#mysterious kitchen

[jisungarchive]

[SKZ-BEHIND📸]

han, lee know & i.n for mysterious KITCHEN🍴

[lq-skz]

[shanklin]

Sentient Mystery Shack, who is really biased towards Stan, so when Ford tells Stan he has to give it back after the summer it’s on sight.

Ford keeps tripping over nothing, nothing is where it's supposed to be and somehow he keeps running into closets when he tries to go outside.

But the worst part, the WORST part is that Ford's lightbulb just won't. Work. No matter what he does it keeps flickering and exploding.

Ford is spiraling. 

There is no reason why it shoudln’t work. All his trial runs work perfectly. He’s already checked the Shacks wiring three times and relearned this dimensions science from the ground up. 

Nothing works.

The Rift? Bill? The impending apocalypse? Eating? Sleep? Who cares about that. 

WHY. WONT. THE. LIGHTBULB. WORK???

It doesn’t help that Stan keeps laughing at him.

“Then you do it!” Ford eventually snaps at Stan.

Stan shrugs and with a little song under his breath screws his own lightbulb in. It works perfectly.

Stanford screams.

[mapofsouthdakota]

If you were to run a kitchen with the LADS guys…

I’m rewatching The Bear (yes the series) and my brain just exploded—like a proper “wait… wait… WAIT” moment. AU, who? Just… bear with me, heeeh. Omg, sorry.

Details: 1500ish words of my creativity just going completely bonkers. This became a pilot! Yaaay

🔪 Xavier – Kitchen Assistant / “The Quiet Backbone”

🩷 “Tell me what you need. I’ll handle the rest.” Said barely above a whisper, while slipping fresh gloves into your hand mid-rush. He didn’t wait for thanks—he was already gone.

Station: Not technically a cook—floats between prep, cleaning, organizing, managing back-of-house chaos. Exceptionally bad at cooking.

Description: Xavier is… not a chef. Everyone learned that quickly, after The Incident With The Eggs. But what he is, is the person who keeps the place from crumbling. He keeps stock rotated, ingredients labeled, knives sharpened, and people from losing their minds.

He doesn’t say much. Always calm, always focused. He moves through the kitchen like part of the architecture—quietly fixing things, cleaning messes before they spread, handing you what you need before you ask. He’ll offer you a rag when you’re bleeding and a chocolate when you’re about to scream.

He’s incredibly bad with flavor—puts sugar in sauces, burns toast—but he’s strangely brilliant at tasks that require repetition and quiet focus: peeling, organizing, cleaning fish (if someone else cooks them). He’ll never be on the line, and he’s fine with that.

He’s a calming presence for you. A quiet safe space. And he always offers you the best bite of whatever he is eating, like a quiet little ritual.

Vibe: Steady. Awkward. Gentle. The heartbeat of the kitchen no one sees—but everyone needs.

Xavier calls

Caleb: “Boss.” No frills. No question. Caleb runs the kitchen, and Xavier follows. Simple as that. Occasionally: “Captain.” When Caleb’s in full command mode.

Rafayel: “Loud one.” Observational. Said like he’s describing the weather. Sometimes: “Glitter.” When Rafayel’s mood and outfit both shine.

Zayne: “Sharp one.” Respectful. Quiet. Rare praise. Occasionally: “Edge.” For when Zayne’s intensity gets a little too pointed.

Sylus: “Other Boss.” Always with a neutral tone. Not sarcastic—just factual. Sylus hates it. Once: “Red tie.” The one time Sylus broke his all-black look. Xavier logged it like a system update.

Xavier calls you:

“Chef.” Neutral, respectful. Used in front of others, especially during service. Occasionally: “Second set.” His personal nickname for you. Quiet, private. It means you’re his other half in the kitchen—his extra pair of hands, eyes, instinct. It’s not about rank. It’s about sync.

🔪Caleb – Head Chef / “The Machine”

🧡 “I’ve got the kitchen. You just breathe.” Said like an order—but only to you. Said during chaos, when the printer won’t stop and the pans are burning. He didn’t touch you, didn’t need to. His steadiness was enough.

Station: Runs the whole kitchen. Controls the pass. Oversees every dish, every second.

Description: Once a rising star in fine dining, Caleb burned out in the brutal world of elite gastronomy—and rebuilt himself into something sharper, more contained. He doesn’t yell—he commands. Every dish goes through him. Every mistake is his to erase. He’s fire, held tight under pressure, and his perfectionism is legendary. If something’s off, he’ll fix it before you even realize.

He walks the line like it’s a battlefield. Sees everything. Misses nothing. Speaks only when it matters.

Except to you.

With you, the rules shift. His attention lingers. The corners of his mouth soften. The warmth he keeps locked down for everyone else flickers through—because you throw him off. You disarm him. You make the pressure feel like something else.

And that scares him more than failure.

Vibe: Smug. Controlled. Scalding beneath the surface. Always watching.

Caleb calls

Rafayel: “Art Project.” Sharp and short when he’s annoyed. Once, in exasperation: “President of the Drama Club.”

Zayne: “Precision.” Said with grudging respect or flat annoyance, depending on the day. Sometimes: “Blade.” Used quietly, when Zayne pulls off something flawlessly under pressure.

Xavier: “Ghost.” With low-key fondness. Xavier’s the only one Caleb doesn’t try to control. Occasionally: “Inventory,” when things go missing and he blames Xavier anyway.

Sylus: Doesn’t nickname him. Just clenches his jaw and mutters “Boss.” Always flat, always loaded

Caleb calls you:

“Chef.” His constant. Used when he’s focused, when he’s tense, when he’s trying not to look at you too long. Occasionally: “Hotshot.” Said with a raised brow and the faintest ghost of a smile. Used when you challenge him—and win. Rarely: Your actual name. Only during quiet moments. And only when he means it.

🔪Rafayel – Pastry Chef / “The Art Freak”

💜 “If it doesn’t make someone feel something—rage, lust, joy, hunger—then what’s the point?” Muttered while throwing out an entire tray of flawless soufflés. Said it like a dare. Like a creed.

Station: Pastry and dessert. Shows up when he wants. Plates like a gallery opening.

Description: A dramatic menace with sea salt in his veins and sugar under his nails. Rafayel treats food like an art installation—and you like a canvas he wants to ruin just to repaint. He’s barefoot half the time, covered in edible pigment, purring “puh-lease” while plating sugar sculptures that make grown chefs cry.

He skips shifts to “meditate by the ocean” or “chase inspiration,” but no one dares cut him loose—because his creations sell out every night.

Charismatic, chaotic, and probably in love with you in twelve different metaphysical ways.

Vibe: Effortlessly beautiful. Loud, flirty, deeply unsettling when he wants to be.

Rafayel calls

Caleb: “Maestro.” Dripping with sarcasm. Occasionally: “Chef Supreme,” “Dictator de Cuisine,” or when he’s feeling truly bold: “Daddy Discipline.”

Zayne: “Icebox.” Consistent. Flamboyantly sung whenever Zayne says something dry. Sometimes: “Slicer.” Used when Zayne’s knife skills make him feel dramatic.

Xavier: “White Rabbit.” Because Xavier vanishes and reappears like a magic trick. Occasionally: “Whisperer.” Usually while narrating Xavier’s movements like he’s on a nature documentary.

Sylus: “Daddy Deep Pockets.” Bold. Loud. Said within earshot on purpose. On quiet nights? “Mystery Merlot.”

Rafayel calls you:

“Flame.” Always. Teasing, flirty, reverent in his own chaotic way. Occasionally: “Little flame” – used when you’re either adorable or frustrating. Never uses your name unless things get very serious.

🔪Zayne – Sous Chef / “The Scalpel”

🩵 “If you flinch at the truth, you shouldn’t be in the kitchen.” Said without raising his voice. Cut sharper than any knife in the drawer.

Station: Second-in-command. Oversees prep, quality control, plating precision.

Description: Everything about Zayne is sharp—his eyes, his knives, his expectations. He doesn’t tolerate sloppiness. Doesn’t indulge drama. But he will step in if you’re falling apart… and do it so quietly, it feels like dignity instead of rescue.

The staff respects him. Fears him a little. But you? He lets his guard down around you. Barely. Sometimes. A sideways smirk. A hand over yours when you’re shaking. A quiet “You’re better than this.”

His loyalty is absolute. So is his judgment.

Vibe: Clean lines, cold eyes, warm core. Gets shit done. Holds secrets close.

Zayne calls

Caleb: “Pressure.” Said only when Caleb’s pushing too hard or when something about him makes the kitchen feel just a little too tight. Not mocking. Just true.

Rafayel: “Theatrics.” Dry, unbothered. In emergencies? “Get out of my station.”

Xavier: “Inventory.” Half joke, half truth. Stuck after Xavier labeled everything one night. Sometimes: “Quiet.” With a rare note of appreciation.

Sylus: “Owner.” Always formal. Laced with cool disdain.

Zayne calls you:

“Chef.” Direct, even-toned, deeply respectful. In private: “Ace.” A personal nickname. Quiet praise. Never explained.

🔪 Sylus – Owner / “The Boss”

❤️ “Perfection is never loud. It just waits for the room to catch up.” Said over wine, once, to you. Calm. Sure. Like the truth was something he’d invented himself.

Station: Doesn’t touch the line—but he owns the building, funds the staff, and secretly curates the entire wine list under everyone’s nose.

Description: Sylus is the kind of boss who never needs to raise his voice. He walks into a room and the temperature drops—not because he’s cruel, but because he never enters without a reason. He doesn’t cook anymore, but when he does pick up a knife, the precision is terrifying. Not because he wants to impress anyone. Because he can.

While the kitchen burns itself out nightly, Sylus hovers just outside the chaos—glass of wine in hand, watching with faint amusement. Everyone assumes the wine pairings are the work of a nameless sommelier. No one knows the handwritten notebook of perfect, sometimes suspiciously intimate flavor pairings is his.

He doesn’t tell them. Why would he? Let them struggle. He’s always five steps ahead.

He calls you “chef” like it’s a compliment and a threat. And when he does offer advice, it’s always helpful… and always laced with something you’ll be turning over in your head long after the shift ends.

Vibe: High-functioning menace in a three-piece suit. Refined, unreadable, devastatingly well-paired. Owns the place, owns the game, and might just be playing you.

Sylus calls

Caleb: “Chef.” Always calm. Always strategic. Once: “Starboy.” No one’s recovered.

Rafayel: “Pixie Dust.” Used once during a wine-fueled jab. Rafayel loved it. Caleb did not.

Zayne: Doesn’t bother. Just meets his eyes and lets the silence work. Occasionally: “Sharp.”

Xavier: “Efficient.” Said like a metric. One-time only. It stuck.

Sylus calls you:

“Chef.” His go-to. He says it like it’s yours to live up to. Occasionally: “Darling.” Only when he’s being particularly smug—or trying to get a reaction from you or Caleb.

——————————————————————————

Writer’s note: Sooo… I was rewatching The Bear while doodling Chapter One of the Coffee Shop, and suddenly this whole thing just unfolded on my keyboard. For some reason, I thought, “Huh… Bear’s kinda like Caleb in some ways.” I might’ve written a whole chapter about it… or maybe not. Heeeeh. Edit: Forgot to mention that I’m a wine and dine nerd, so there’s definitely a personal touch to this AU too. Bless my poor brain. Okey then, thank you for reading! 🫶🏻

[lunarharp]

scrappies cause HE'S BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 📖

[bumbleboyart]

sweatertown real

[souenkun]

I think what drives me the craziest about yorishima is how he still looks so young despite being grandpa-aged instead of how handsome he actually looks 😭

[rayyanishere1]

one day in the backupsmore uni dorms circa 1970 something

stan: if life gives you lemons, what do you do?

ford: life never gave us lemons. lemons are a manmade hybrid of other citrus fruits. if life did give me lemons, i'd ask where they got them from.

fidds: if life gives you lemons, give them to someone else 'cause you hate lemons.

ford: what about you, stan? what would you do if life gave you lemons?

stan: eat it.

(taken from a very funny convo i had with @sharkiewyu [fidds] and @nazchokey [stan])

[formosusiniquis]

caught flour handed

For the @steddiemicrofic challenge Prompt: cake | WC: 311 | G | no CW A Dustin POV steddie discovery, everyone's fave

Steve has been up to something for weeks. Dustin knows the only way to find out what he’s been up to: sneak in and go through his shit. He’s calling it sneaking too, because if he knows where the key is he doesn’t think it can be called breaking and entering.

He twists the front knob slowly so it doesn’t click in the latch, even mostly deaf Steve always knows when someone’s at the door. Eddie would say crouching before he’s even through the doorway is a dead giveaway that something’s up. But what does he know?

“There are more helpful places your hands could be.” Dustin freezes in place; his hand still on the front door.

“There are less helpful places my hands could be.” That’s Eddie’s voice responding, but his van hadn’t been in the driveway.

“You’re the one that said you wanted cake.” He’s too far from the kitchen to tell, but Dustin would bet Steve has his hands on his hips.

“What if I said I actually wanted beefcake.” 

Steve can be a bit of a ditz sometimes, but Dustin can’t imagine him getting cake and that confused. What would beefcake even be, meatloaf?

“I would say you should have said something before we got up.”

“I would’ve but y’know how you get when your mind’s made up, Sweetheart.”

“No, I don’t actually. Want to share, Edmund?”

“Only that delicious cake you’re making.” Dustin can hear Eddie’s feet moving on Steve’s tile flooring. He’s creeping up on the doorway now, but has to assume based on the giggling that Eddie was moving out of smacking range.

Moving even closer, Dustin can see Steve facing the oven. Two perfect, white handprints on the ass of his jeans. “Your child is lurking,” Steve says, “do you wanna tell him what you’ve been doing to his babysitter, or should I?”

[kennico]

a bit of harry brainrot honestly idk how I ended up here

[jisungarchive]

[SKZ-BEHIND📸]

han, lee know & i.n for mysterious KITCHEN🍴

[stellewriites]

HES ON THE TRAIN AND OFFICIALLY MOVED OUT

[captainrufflebanger]

Me: what an exhausting day of work I'd sure like to lie down on the couch and rest for a bit.

Dad: ok I'll make dinner :)

Me: thanks. But you're not gonna burn anything on the stove, right?

Dad:

Me: Right?

Dad:

The stove:

[ccaptain]

At this point, it feels imperative to start dwelving deeper into my own self-made piece of lore, the beings of Enigmata.

It has already been tackled Mythus creations come from a simple human being and meets a ''de-evolution'' in order to, then, evolve into a creature of Enigmata. 

We have, however, not explained how the idea for these eternal beings who speak in riddles has come to the Aeon of Enigmata. And to explain this, we need to address the fact that ''rumors'' can't be born from nothingness.

Even the Aeon of Enigmata, Master of Illusions, needs a base to start working on. Lies are not conceived out of thin air; they need a foundation to start, a catalyst to spread the rumors that will ultimately made the listeners stray further and further away from the Truth. In order for the lies to deceive, the foundation set must be truly terrible. It needs to instill terror, to submit someone to terrifying life changes, for someone to indulge in the sweet lies and refuse to take off their eye covers.

So, here it comes:

What are beings of the Enigmata, and how are they created?

Beings of Enigmata start as common human beings, and undergo a long process where their previous identity is burned away to the core, leaving a blank slate to work on. And this is the foundation that Mythus worked on, originally- a corpse, with the most basic of consciences surviving into it.

In order for the transformation into a ''being'' to be complete, the base of an human body needs to be used as a catalyst for said transformation. Once this has been obtained, the Truth of its origins can be shrouded in mystery as the most basic human functions it once operated on are substituted with the functions of its new identity. The Enigmata imbues new powers into it, and shapes them into the uncanny human-like presences that populate the galaxy per my lore.

However, as much as I try to simplify the process of it, it's not a simple process at all.

What Mythus intended to do was alter the original nature of a species into another, aka a transmutation from biological being into an artificial one. The result of changing something like this to the core is bound to give some pushback, in some way, as it's an alteration that clashes with how an human being was originally created: biologically.

You are trying to fit a square into a circular form- it may mold and stick to the newly found form, slowly. it's destiiny is to follow the whim of its molder to fit into the circle, and with time it'll start shaping like the mold- but it'll rebel, at first. It was never supposed to be a circle, in the first place.

This is the clash between the beings new, artificial nature born from a biological one, there's going to be some resistance. This defiance is a ''condition'' that many beings have, a decoloration of some of their extremities along with the partial loss of feeling in the area affected by the ''condition''. It will usually affect the areas the being most uses to let the power of Enigmata flow out of them. The more power used, the more the ''condition'' will spread across the area.

The condition can be called with its proper name now: ''decay''.

Kaeya's hands are not cold because of his element, Ice: those are the body parts he uses the most with his power as Emanator, and thus the most permanently affected by the decay derived from the clash of natures the being-yfication has created.

The power of Enigmata keeps it at bay, somewhat, but also it's the power that has altered the nature of the human body that was once the catalyst for process of being-yfication. Thus, the more this artificial power is used, the more it speeds up the desperate decaying of what's left from their original, biological nature.

No being has ever used an excessive amount of power to try burning away their artificial identity, so far. It is unknown what would happen in this case.

Mythus has crafted ways, particulary substances and objects, to keep this facet of THEIR beings at bay. This is the eternal solution THEY have found, and it seems to work as said objects/substances are found within the Archive of each being, a zone accessible to them. The water from the Misty Sea that makes the decay retrocede in Kaeya's hands will never run out, as the sea just below the mist replenishes itself with lies and deceit among his riddles.

Mythus is often accused of being distant and uncaring; but with the fact that THEY have altered alchemical rules and the biology of humans to make THEIR creations, and went to length to give each one something personalized to keep the side-effects of the being-yfication at bay, would this statement still be considered Truth?

[tiny-breadcrumbs]

When his blunt kitchen knife start to get into your nerves

[eleanornicholemiller]

“CRIME SCENE KITCHEN IS BAAAACK!”

“The new episode premieres TOMORROW!”

“HYPE HYPE HYPE HYPE!”