#my things!
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sober thoughts | s.reid
summary: pining!reader makes a drunk call to spencer after going out with friends, and is aggressively trying to flirt with him.
tags: reader is DRUNK! alcohol!! dont read if thats not okay!!, fluffy as fuck, spencer is the most gentle of gentlemen, pining!reader, reader wears makeup/dress/heels, spencer is lowkey bad at flirting but he shows affection in weird ways, one use of Y/N (sorry i know)
a/n: this has been bouncing around in my head for a while. sigh.
word count: 1.9k
masterlist
He was used to seeing you tipsy, if that was even the right word for it.
You were friends, after all. Best friends, even. And the fact that he lived only a few doors down from the pub the team frequented made it stupid not to offer his couch to you after going out with the team.
You weren’t a heavy drinker by any stretch of the imagination. Every now and then on a Friday night, you’d head out with the team and have one, maybe two drinks if you were feeling particularly adventurous–but you still didn’t want to drive home, especially when he was offering his home to you. Truthfully, you just liked getting to hang out with him. You liked getting to exist in his orbit and discuss a random topic late into the night. It had become normal for you, an excuse to do something together that didn’t revolve around work.
What was not normal was the fact that it was a Saturday at 11 PM and you were really drunk, calling him.
Your contact photo filled his screen, illuminating the dark room. You weren’t one to call, preferring the convenience of a text. Especially this late, which worried him a bit. He picked up quickly, tucking the phone to his ear.
“Hey, you okay?”
“Hey, Spencer?” It wasn’t your voice. “This is Molly, Y/N’s friend. I’m sorry to call so late. We’re out with some friends from college celebrating someone’s birthday, and she got… like, drunk drunk, kinda sloppy… and she’s been blabbing about you for a while. She wanted me to call you.”
“Oh,” he sighs. He runs a hand through his hair, preparing himself. “Can you put her on?”
“Yeah. Not sure you’ll get anything out of her, though. Here…”
He can hear the general chatter and chaos of the bar over the call. There’s some rustling sounds before you finally take the phone.
“Hi,” you say, your voice dripping with a certain kind of fondness. He can hear the smile through the screen.
“Hey,” he replies. ”You having fun?”
“Oh, Spencer, I was… I haven’t heard your voice in so long. What’re you…” you trail off, lifting the phone from your ear to answer someone else. “Sorry. ‘S so loud in here.
He chuckles to himself. “I saw you yesterday.”
“Yeah, ‘nd that was… Oh, I can’t do math right now. A long time ago.”
“Are you okay?”
On the other side of town, you were sitting in a barstool, swiping your finger along the beads of condensation rolling down the glass of water in front of you.
“Mhm. ‘M good. Fine. Drunk.”
“Yeah, I can tell,” he smiles. “Are you gonna be able to get home?”
“Uhh…” you pause. “I was gonna Uber… but then I thought that maybe… if you weren't busy… we could hang out…”
He could vaguely make out dialog on the other end of the phone. Some kind of “Girl, this sounds really pathetic,” followed by a “Shhhh!” in two other drunken voices.
“But I could also make Molly order me an Uber,” you added. “‘S okay. Nevermind.”
“No, you're not getting in an Uber inebriated. That’s ridiculous.”
“‘M not inebriated.”
A background voice comes back. “Yeah, you are.”
Spencer sighs into the phone. “Just… send me your location, please? I’ll come get you.”
“O-kay. ‘M sending it right now, jus’ tell me when you-”
The call went dead before you could finish your thought, which he chalked up to some kind of drunken user error. A few seconds later a text came through
You: dropped a pin
You: its molly again. let me know if you got this
He responded, relieved that you had someone looking after you, before getting ready and grabbing his keys.
-
You were sitting on a bench outside the bar. The air was cool and crisp, but you were warm, your skin clammy from the alcohol. You had been mumbling something incoherent about Spencer, he’s just so good to me, Molly, and oh, god, I don’t know what to do with myself, and…
Molly, who had been trying to sober you up (unsuccessfully), was standing in front of you, arms crossed, listening to your incessant rambling.
“...’nd sometimes he talks to me, ‘nd I have no idea what he’s talking about but he’s so hot when he’s smart. You should hear, it, Mol’.”
Cars pass on the street behind you, filling the silence momentarily. Molly looks over her shoulder, scanning the street before turning back to you. “Alright. Be quiet. He’s here”
“Don’t care.”
She puts her hand out to help you up, which you accept rising to your feet. You’re surprised by how unsteady you feel, but you focus on putting one foot in front of the other.
“I’ll make fun of you for this tomorrow,” she says.
You only have a few seconds to grumble in protest before Spencer reaches you. He scans you quickly, chuckling to himself.
“You are a mess,” he says, amused.
You feel slightly infantilized watching Molly hand over all your personal effects to him. You weren’t even sure when you’d put down your wallet and keys, much less where, but you’re thankful she picked them up and not someone else.
“Good luck,” She tells him. She pats your arm before turning back to the bar, leaving you alone on the street with him.
“You okay?” He asks. You watch him shuck off his jacket, which he helps you slide over your arms.
“‘M fine,” you reply. “Warm.”
“Because you’re drunk.” He keeps his eyes trained on the zipper of the jacket, or really anywhere that isn't you in that dress. “Alcohol is a vasodilator. So you feel warm. But it's forty degrees outside, and hypothermia doesn't care.”
You pout at him, watching as he pulls the zipper tab up enough to shield you from the cold. Only then does he really look at you.
“I wanted you to see my pretty dress,” you pout. Your words come out slurred still.
You meet his eyes for a split second. He opens his mouth, seemingly about to reply, but quickly decides against it. He shakes his head as if to clear the thought.
“Come on. We gotta get you home.”
“You don't like it?”
“I didn't say that.” He tucks a hand under your arm as you begin back down the street, keeping you steady.
“So you do like it?” You look over at him, your face more excited than he was expecting.
“It’s very pretty,” he replies.
Your shoulder bumps his as you walk, seemingly unable to maintain a straight path along the sidewalk. The click of your heels against the pavement is uneven, despite your efforts to maintain some kind of composure, and unfortunately for you, he’s right, and it's freezing outside. You make steady progress down the block, placing all your focus on not falling flat on your face. Thankfully, he doesn't live all that far.
“D’you think I look pretty, too?” You ask, approaching the steps to his apartment.
“What are you trying to do?” he asks, looking down at you. He takes in the slight flush of your cheeks as the effects of the alcohol battle the chill in the air.
“I’m trying to flirt with you. And you didn’t answer my question.”
“Oh, you're going to be difficult all night, aren't you?” He sighs, ignoring the question. He pauses outside the door, keys in hand, and unlocks the door before guiding you inside.
“You don't ever want to flirt with me.”
The door falls shut behind you with a clunk. The room is dark, with only the distant light from a lamp somewhere across the room illuminating it. You squint when he turns on the big light.
“That’s not true,” he says, quietly. If you weren’t hanging on to his every word, you might have missed it. He carefully unzips the jacket, tugging it off your shoulders and setting it on the table.
“So why won’t you flirt with me right now?”
“Because you’re drunk,” He guides you towards the couch, his touch still careful as ever.
You flop down onto the cushions. The leather sticks to your legs as you sit. Being the gentleman he is, he has already left pajamas out, his pajamas, you’d since claimed as your own, with the blanket you steal every time you stay over.
“So what?” You begin working at the clasp on your heels, fumbling with the leather straps to no avail.
“So, you’re drunk.” He repeats, reappearing in front of you. He sits on the edge of the coffee table in front of you, and hands you a pack of makeup wipes. “Do you need help with your shoes?”
You nod. A soft breath of laughter escapes him as he leans in to help you take them off, setting them on the carpeted floor.
“Spence,” you look at the pack of wipes. “Why do you have these?”
“Because every time you’re here you forget them,” he replies.
“Oh.” You rip them open. “You don’t have a secret girlfriend?”
“No,” he replies, lowering your foot back to the ground.
“You don't let other drunk girls sleep over?” You paw at your eyeliner, effectively smearing it around more than removing it.
“I don't let anyone sleep over,” he says, taking the wipe from you. “Just you. Close your eyes.”
“Because you love me?”
His fingers find the underside of your chin, gently tilting your face towards his so he can finish swiping away the last of your eyeliner. Maybe you’re blushing as a result of the alcohol warming your bloodstream, but the more likely answer is him, at this proximity.
As soon as he’s done wiping your eyes, you open them again to look up at him.
“You’re bold when you’re drunk,” he says, smiling. He sets the used wipe down on the table.
“Mhm. You didn’t answer my question.”
“I’m not going to,” He says. “Sorry. Go get changed.”
“That wasn’t a ‘no’,” you say. You collect the clothes off the couch and slink across the apartment into the bathroom to change. You don’t bother shutting the bathroom door before slinking off the dress you were wearing and sliding on the pajamas he’d left for you. Once you finish, you collect your dress off the floor and make your way back towards the couch, settling right into the cushions as you frequently did on nights like this.
You were formulating another complaint about his lack of reciprocation, but your thoughts were interrupted as he pulled the blanket on his couch over you. Your blanket, or at least one you’d claimed as your own during one of your nights spent here. He had already turned off the ceiling fan, which you’d always insisted off when you slept over. You followed him with your gaze as he turned the lights off, swapping them instead for a smaller, softer light somewhere in the kitchen, remembering the way you’d always insisted he leave a light on somewhere, just for you. Your phone was already charging on a side table, your heels sitting nicely by the door, your keys on his key holder, evidence of you, everywhere, details that were distinctly for your comfort. Maybe you had missed his signals.
“I think you do love me…”
He reappeared a moment later, crouching in front of you with that look. He rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. “Go to sleep.”
“And I love you. And I called you because I wanted to tell you that.”
“You really need to sleep it off. You’re saying things you don’t mean.”
“But I do mean it,” you whined. “I swear. Ask me again tomorrow.”
“You won’t remember this tomorrow,” he laughed.
“But I will. I promise,” you replied. “No bedtime kiss?”
Of course, this time you did pick up the way he looked at you.
“No, honey. Maybe tomorrow.”
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where's that masterpost of quotes that have no right going as hard as they do. I'd like to submit "Protagonism is best left to teens and the insane"
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writing advice for characters with a missing eye: dear God does losing an eyes function fuck up your neck. Ever since mine crapped out I've been slowly and unconsciously shifting towards holding my head at an angle to put the good eye closer to the center. and human necks. are not meant to accommodate that sorta thing.
#like it started with me just holding things more towards my right#but the things started shifting more towards center and my head turns instead#like. when im driving especially i have to keep my head turned so i can see on coming traffic#and when im around people ive noticed i position myself so my body is facing them and then turn my head to get them actually#centered in my now very right biased field of view#so anyways draw blorbo bleebus cheated to that 3/4s angle without guilt#at least one one eyed fucker actually does that
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slow down for your disabled friends. thats like a bare minimum kindness that we shouldnt have to ask for. i love that youre so quirky and walking fast is a cool personality trait to you and all that but i bet you can count your physically disabled friends on less than one hand
#in a perfect world the move im gay meme would be about being fat or having a mobility aid and people just standing in your way in public#my bemoanings#debated posting this but itd be nice to have some solidarity where my mobility aid users at who have not a lot of good outside friends#also if youre a friend of mine who is worried that you might be the person in the comic im gonna be real#MULTIPLE ppl have said this exact thing to me and id rather you just slow down next time. dont come to me asking for forgiveness or smth#also straight up the person in this comic i havent seen for years because they were mean to me anyways
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presented without comment
#this is perhaps the worst thing i’ve ever made#so now it gets to terrorise people outside of my private discord server#enjoy#gravity falls#billford#gideon gleeful#dipper pines#stanley pines#stanford pines#bill cipher#the book of bill
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As gen-AI becomes more normalized (Chappell Roan encouraging it, grifters on the rise, young artists using it), I wanna express how I will never turn to it because it fundamentally bores me to my core. There is no reason for me to want to use gen-AI because I will never want to give up my autonomy in creating art. I never want to become reliant on an inhuman object for expression, least of all if that object is created and controlled by tech companies. I draw not because I want a drawing but because I love the process of drawing. So even in a future where everyone’s accepted it, I’m never gonna sway on this.
#personal#im still fighting it but im also a realist so I’ve accepted that this will be our future#rant#gen ai is fucking boring#I hope this doesn’t make me sound like a ‘going against the crowd. not like the rest of society’ type (it would be depressing if it did)#but yeah even in a world where it’s considered totally fine to use ai to make art I’ll still be using my bare hands#because I like it and nobody can take that from me#if you’re a young artist interested in or already using ai. just know that the thing you rely on to make art can be taken away at any point#all of it. and there’s nothing you can do about it if they decide to. it doesn’t belong to you
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good thing from jp twitter this week is queen of old man yaoi michiru sonoo discovering the term old man yaoi





update: somehow it got impossibly more wholesome



quick translation: おかえり: welcome home あ 終わった 終わった: ahhh, it's over! it's done! コーヒー? お茶?: coffee? tea? コ~ヒ~ ありがと: coffee, thank you~ ネクタイレア★★ ネクタイ取るレア★★★★: seeing him with a tie on, rarity level ★★, seeing him take a tie off, rarity level ★★★★ にあうな~: it suits him~





also please do follow: AraigumaSha: sensei's twitter account marureviere: maru, who does such valuable work highlighting bl manga for an international audience
#'this is my old man yaoi masterpiece' <3333#soooooo cute she is SO excited and pleased about it and so giddily interacting with international fans about it#and marvelling to japanese fans like: did you guys know about this??? old man yaoi \o\ \o/#psttt michiru-sensei you want to do a severance doujinshi soooo bad. please.#meanwhile foul thing from jp twitter this week is the man boasting about how he made deepfake p*rn of his girlfriend's best friend#because he couldn't stop thinking about her#and also he thought he was being such a Good Boyfriend he actually told his girlfriend about it#and he was furious she was furious#he was like women........ i'm doing this for the good of our relationship but women never understand our (men's) sacrifices#you know all those doombait articles about how japan is going to go extinct#maybe that should happen.#anyway. let old man yaoi heal you until then.#michiru sonoo#manga#yaoi#twitter#old man yaoi#queer#gay#long post#lgbt#japan#japanese
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shoutout to the guy who after unsuccessfully hitting on my sister and being politely declined asked her "is it okay if i ask your brother instead" and when she said yes gave me a long and searching look before sighing and going "no. i am not drunk enough to go for a dude. but you look like an angel" happy bisexual pride to this man and this man only. hope you figure it out soon king
#interestingly not the most harrowing thing that happened tonight no that was#getting recognized from a podcast. i hope that never happens to me again thats so fucking scary#fuck me and my wretched life why do i always end up exisiting in the public eye while detesting the consequences
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shoutout to everyone who wants to infodump but cant string together coherent thoughts to form sentences and instead just look at you like this
#and by 'everyone' i mean me. im just hoping other people relate lmao#someone asks me about a thing i like and im just like h..................#been thinking about The Character for a solid 6 months+ and let me tell you. expldoeing soon#this is about ffxv btw . how am i supposed to say how much it lives in my brain . i cant think#text#1k#5k#10k#15k#20k#great googly moogly#30k#40k#50k#60k#boooy what da heeel#70k#80k#90k#will this be my first ever post to hit 100k... it remains to be seen#good lord. we did it#100k
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Spencer who learns that he loves when you play with his hair, and it's a total accident. He's so adamant that he doesn't like physical touch from the majority of people, and so the first time it happens, you're sitting together, watching a movie, and it's a mindless thing that you don't even realize you're doing. He probably shoots you a really confused look at first, like he's halfway ready to protest, but then he realizes oh actually thats kind of nice? and shuts up about it.
And after a while he learns to come to expect it from you whenever you're in close proximity, like maybe in bed or when he's reading at home. You never explicitly offer the gesture, and he never asks, but you kind of fall into a pattern that he just gets used to.
And then maybe one day you fall asleep before him and he's just lying there in bed like ??? uhh wait a minute??? because he's so used to falling asleep to you the feeling of your nails running across his scalp and he just has to sit there and remember how on earth he would ever fall asleep before that started. And then he would probably give in and try and get you to wake up by pretending that he's pulling you closer or something just to get you to stir enough that hopefully, you'll just do it on your own and you'll fall asleep like that, one hand still tangled in his hair and you just can't fathom that once this same man that rejected a handshake because germs requires physical contact to function.
#drabbles#Spencer Reid x reader#my things!#spencer reid fluff#fluff#spencer reid fanfic#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfic#spencer x reader#spencer reid
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Oh jayce
#jayce talis#viktor arcane#arcane viktor#arcane#jayvik#in case you didnt know meme redraws are my fave thing to do#ro draws
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stuck between "psychological horror statement" and "objectively the funniest thing you could say to your real flesh and blood dad" in the father's day card aisle
#🐉#im not gonna send either of them to my dad because i value my peace and safety but i really was tempted by the second one#'why do you have to send a card to your dad i thought you hated that guy' well the thing is one time i forgot#when i was like. ten. and his reaction was not something i ever want to relive.
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yesterday's halloween piece
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Bro thinks she could just thug it out
#this is so stupid#worst thing i've ever drawn i think#disappointed in myself for this lowkey but I'm gonna post it anyways#art#my art#fanart#mouthwashing curly#mouthwashing fanart#anya mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mw#curly mw#captain curly#curly mouthwashing#mouthwashing#wrong organ#mouthwashing meme#queen never cry#artists on tumblr#clearlydusty
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(college stuff) everyone give it up for the humble arapaima
#art#my art#doodle#drawing#digital art#illustration#fish#arapaima#man college really has done great things for my ability to color. gotta give it that
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