#my life has purpose again
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#wen qing#wei wuxian#the untamed#wenqing weiwuxian brotp agenda#they are besties#BESTIES#you will have to wrestle my sunshine gay dude x scary lesbian brotps outta my cold dead hands#i will apparently just keep shitposting now#my life has purpose again
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finally seeing barbie tomorrow
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I was consumed by the need to see P in that incredible mask from Lisrim's original music video lmao 💫
#sin scribbles#lies of p#pinocchio lies of p#p lies of p#neowiz#djmax#(can you tell im like gasping for that dlc because i am. im about to turn into dust and disappear on the wind never to be seen again)#(i cant believe this is where life has taken me. but im also not complaining.)#(this is a formal request for neowiz to patch this mask in as a wearable accessory. actually this is not a request it is a heated demand.)#(i am currently sick but ill be damned if that stops me from drawing my wildest dreams i.e this)#(anyway the lies of p version of lisrim slaps like crazy and ive been feral about it since it dropped. AMEN.)#(the moment i saw the thumbnail for the og version of lisrim it was over for me i was given divine purpose and had no choice in the matter.#(you are my soooon YOURE MY SON. BOOGIE WOOGIE WOOGIE.)
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Happy Birthday to Maxwell Car- FUCK THAT GUY Happy Birthday to JACK CARTER CAUSE HE DESERVES RECOGNITION TOO 💖🎂 Post-Constant Carter Family happiness is so fucking important to me they might not have much but they have each other 😫😫
-transparent version under the cut-
#DST#Wendy#DST Wendy#Jack#DST Jack#marso art#listen#LISTEN#Carter family happiness takes up so much of my brain space it's honestly a crime I've drawn it so little#The only remaining family he has left was his daughter who disappeared only to suddenly come back after years of no sign of her existence#his own little miracle :')#When Wendy came back his life had purpose again#And so did Wendy's#They hang onto each other so tightly in the best of ways and have grown even closer than they could ever imagine#Absence makes the heart grow fonder and these two would fight to the death for each other :'))))
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LSTR-S2301 and the maintenance tunnel ARAR are best friends to me even though that Elster was only on sierpinski for a seemingly brief time, they’re bros who fuck around on the clock during work. I think Elster was probably more willing to put extra time in however she’s also very “okay you’ve given me a list of tasks I did them. They’re done and done well. That’s it, my time now.” Whereas I see Ara being more of a slacker (very valid of her) or at the very least just a bare minimum type of gal when it comes to work.
Idk I tend to imagine them fucking off in the middle of shifts to go find weird lonely corners of sierpinski to hang out in. They don’t even talk half the time but they love it.
#listen I know sierpinski Elster has Alina as her lover#I don’t necessarily see Elster/ara as romantic although it could be#they’re just tired work bros to me#u have machine autism and plant autism and they’re both silent types I think they’d click#I’ve seen some fun takes on Lilith and Elster as characters too#to me Lilith Itou is definitely the strong silent type but not bc she always means to be#yes she is an intimidating war veteran but I think part of that intimidation factor comes from her being awkward as hell when it comes#to talking#combo of awkward/ just being a woman of few words anyway#which comes through in LSTRs I think#they don’t say much when they don’t feel that they need to ig#anyway idk if this makes sense I’m just rambling#I was also just trying to think abt LSTR-S2301 bc poor thing#imagine being your own individual replika but you’re brought to this place as basically a sacrificial lamb? of sorts#in that you as you are. it’s not what you need to be for a god’s purpose#but it’s close enough that the parts that aren’t needed can be stripped away#and filled again#she was only ever meant to be a vessel for 512 in many ways#but she was still S2301 and had her own life and friends for a brief moment in time#signalis#this isn’t worded well but gets the tag regardless#I should make a rambles tag separate from my personal tag maybe#lynx rambles#<- new tag ig
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I guess I won’t be finishing my bookclub book today after all… 👀
how even did you get that second paw badge? 🐈
Through perseverance 🫡
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HELP I JUST CAME UP WITH ANOTHER ANT!ANGST PROMPT-
#at this point I’m just coming up with the most awful ways to basically torture him#to give you an idea of what I’ve come up with#i already have:#trapped in a ravine in a powered down shadow knight that was in stealth mode#shot by a harpoon#trapped on an alien planet#loss of leg (httyd crossover AND a brief hypothetical i made years ago)#dead and then brought back to life with existential issues and crisis#trapped on a deserted island with a bunch of inexperienced kids and angry dinosaurs#kidnapped and isolated (two seperate fics. BY THE SAME MAN)#two different forms of kidnapped and separated from the Nektons for years before he’s found again#<-no wait three#six thousand year back role swap where he’s villainized in the present for ancestors mistakes#brutal transformation into original creature from my original world#alien werewolf transformation that involves a fight with his sister in which she thinks he’s going to kill her#(that one is both ant and Fontaine angst)#and now I’ve come up with ‘stuck and nearly drowns all alone and has to rescue himself’#my Subnautica crossover is like a dozen different angst forms and tropes all in the same fic#I’m sorry Ant I don’t know why i keep doing this to you!#I’m not doing it on purpose it’s just too easy to think up whump scenarios to put you in!#the deep 2015#the deep cartoon#ant nekton#antaeus nekton
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Chef greg delivery just for you. it's a wonder I hadn't bearified him yet, he's my fave greg too 🔪
gays literally only want one thing (to be chopped up and eaten by a depressed man) and it's fucking disgusting
#kabukeo#something to bear in mind#other's art#limbus company#project moon#lcb gregor#r.b. sous chef gregor#namesake#i'm sorry for doing a haha funny joke reply i just like#i spent like ten minutes pacing around my house when i saw this in my inbox i'm not exaggerating#thank you for my life i love him so bad#do i need a gift art tag now i just like. i don't even know what to say#i haven't even made any actual proper posts yet i just made a silly blog i feel like i haven't done anything to earn this#to stop myself from blubbering i'm just going to respond to the tags on your rb#no problem for providing details again i think about this grown ass fucking man too god damn much but it's not a problem.#problems are only problems if you call them a problem. it's not a problem.#thank you for seeing the vision on rhino geg.#since kjh refuses to release him that just means that we can continue to acknowledge this as true and canon and there's nothing he can do#[ignore that he has a cameo in a card in game no he doesn't]#to me rosespanner is like. very much the type of guy that when you're crushing on him you try to talk to him#and then you get him to start talking about stuff he's interested in#and then before long you end up agreeing to watch something you don't care for in the slightest#solely for the purpose of having something in common to talk with him about#meanwhile he doesn't pick up on you trying to flirt with him like at all#anyway i could go on about how badly i need hex nail gregor for both bear reasons and thematic Actual reasons#but i'm pretty sure i'm about to hit the tag limit. so i'll just say thank you again for the cannibal i will treasure him forever and alway#it took me like thirty minutes to type this all out after i sat down to actually do it because i kept getting embarrassed lmao#offerings to beargregor#< gift art tag#that's it. thank you for my life once again. keep fighting the good fight soldier. we'll get this to be common fanon one day. trust.
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One day
One day I hope people realize that Kitsunami already "broke through his programming" back by issue #56 of Idw Sonic
He had an entire mini arc where he dealt with being without Surge for the first time, and in the real world. He met Sonic and his friends directly, tried to work out what his purpose would be without Surge in his life (gave it a shot trying to devote himself to Sonic, seeing him as the next best thing after Surge). And when it was all said and done, he decided after experiencing more that at Surge's side is where he wanted to be.
As of the recent IDW issues, Kit isn't sticking with Surge "because of programming" and "because he just needs for other characters to friend him and turn him into a better person". He is at her side because he wants to be. He protects her and aids her because he cares about her, not just because he's serving the strongest guy in the room. And he's not interacting with others because he's decided not to give a shit about anyone else other than Surge (because from his pov, even the "good guys" are fake. From his pov, everyone is someone trying to lie and manipulate their way into pulling him and Surge to their side)
Kit already has decided what he wants to do with his life. And he decided it on his own. Not because of anyone else's wants or wishes. That's the whole point of his speech at the end of #56.
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He's burying whatever his and Surge's past is and moving forward with his conviction to be with Surge because it's what he wants.
#sonic the hedgehog#idw sonic comics#perverted bond#surge the tenrec#kit the fennec#kitsunami the fennec#idw sonic issue 56#to be honest I actually despise the fandom's overuse of 'Starline's programming'#because they treat Surge and Kit as people whose entire selves have been dominated and controlled by a set of code that makes them as robots#Essentially they treat Starline's hypnotism and 'coding' as a strict set of rules that's hard af to break#When the truth is that they're more of a set of heavy suggestions and guidelines to fall back on when they have nothing else to return to or#nothing else to compare to their own experiences#You can visually see in the comic as they ''diverge from their programming'' simply because it clashes with their personal wants/feelings#(For instance‚ how after actually meeting Surge in Imposter Syndrome‚ he is never again the dutiful fox that would do anything she asked#ever and the happiest he could be about handing his life to her on a silver platter no matter how she treats him. rather‚ he falls back on#serving her because he has no other purpose to fall back on‚ but he performs it unenthusiastically without receiving positive reinforcement#and to the bare minimum‚ as if he's just doing his job)#This topic is a bit nuanced‚ but I think IDW is less focused on them fully 'breaking their programming' as a robot storyline might go#and more focused on them solidifying just what it is they want to do with their lives and how they live it#Many people miss that Kitsunami has had his defining moment and knows what he wants to do with his life now because they don't think it's#possible for him to live a future he wants/needs unless he 100% rejects everything Starline did to him and Surge and chooses a purpose#completely separated from any 'programming'#And I'm sorry but I think some of you need to ask if a future as a good boy fox hero who gets entirely new friends and family outside of#Surge and is barely associated with her and is also just a normal sweet guy is something that he actually wants/is projected to receive#or if YOU specifically decided what's best for him. Bec#Because 'If I was in his position obviously I would want X' or 'If he was my kid I would want him to become like X for the sake of his own#happiness'#It's fine if that's your headcanon or your au and you own it. But recognize that this current Kit likes who he is and he knows what he wants#to be. He's a smart fox‚ and he doesn't need anyone out there to pledge to save him and fix him. He doesn't want fixing. He wants to spend#the rest of his days with Surge making her happy (because it makes him happy). He doesn't want for himself what everyone else wants for him.
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It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry
( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)
(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)
#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him#I always knew he was a parental figure for me#but now I connected the dots#How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life#that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so#and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life#ofc ud become attached#i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him#he occupies most of my thoughts honestly#But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life#i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an#bloom and be free#and that's what ill try to do#but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness#its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired#somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea#how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi#g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if#lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways#sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay#yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le#go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk#how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate#my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t#me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol#so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest#y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t#ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti#ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd
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I am way too tired/jetlagged to make this post right now, but the reason Armada Starscream is so specifically well done to me actually isn't just the way he's got more depth than just wanting to take over Megatron. It's the way he falls back on this image he has of himself as someone who is solely focused on Megatron. And he is obsessed with Megatron, but the disconnect between Starscream and his image of himself is what gives him actual depth.
The reason this is so cool to me is like, that self-image--that he is single-mindedly obsessed with Megatron and will sacrifice everything else for that goal, no matter who gets hurt--is pretty close to what every other Starscream is. (The selfishness you associate with Starscream is a little more subtle, but it's there in the "no matter who gets hurt" clause imo.)
So if you go into this as a Transformers fan, you're already expecting Starscream to betray Megatron and try to best him and rule the Decepticons. But so does Starscream, even when he's demonstrably proven to both his peers and the audience that he's more than that. It's almost like his past incarnations--or the audience's expectation of him--haunt him. It turns his own internal man-versus-self conflict into this really cool man-versus-narrative conflict.
And what's crazy about this is, through the last moments of this arc, Starscream does grow beyond the narrative we'd expect from other Starscreams! But he never admits that to himself, because it's easier for him to cling to the idea that he's laser-focused on his hatred of Megatron. Every time he helps the minicons--every time he helps the humans--even in his last words, he LIES to himself and everyone around him that everything he did was always about Megatron. Because it's easier to simplify himself than to grasp that he might be a complex character. Because he's a person and he has all the messy conflicts that come with that. He falls back on the same ideas every single other Starscream did, and THAT is his undoing. Not that he is self-centered because he's Starscream. Not that he is obsessed with Megatron because he's Starscream. That he THINKS he is all of those things and he will not LET himself be anything else.
I would argue that that's a bigger theme in Armada, as well. Optimus and Megatron more or less spend their final fight coming to terms with their story roles in Transformers. I really feel like if you sneezed on them, they would realize they do this in every universe and in every timeline. Starscream's is the most interesting example to me, though, because he's such a departure from other versions of Starscream; hell, he acts (and looks, lol) a lot more like some incarnations of Thundercracker. But he's still got classic Starscream in him in this roundabout meta reference. He's like an homage to his namesake. It's so cool! And it works perfectly with the story he's a part of.
#transformers armada#armada starscream#so. this part goes in the tags but. if you know me or recognize my url you may be going ''half life fan take''#especially given that this is by far my favorite starscream that i have ever seen#I am beating zero half life/valve gaming allegations with this one#but imo this is a reminder to me that like. the best meta media is always the kind that doesnt shout it out#i mean. generally the more you have to handhold your audience on what the media is about. the more it is bad#unless it's specifically really dialectal media aimed at young children and the directness is like. The Point#(wild robot being a good example of very obvious media meant for kids that is still clearly like. fantastic)#but in general i think meta media (metagames and the like) kinda lose their impact when you have to explain them#people forget that half life doesn't really hold your hand about this#because valve games are so entrenched in internet culture#it goes beyond ''the one free man'' as an icon - the game is about the horror of being a video game player character#and especially of being a silent protagonist#gordon's helplessness in the plot and the way he's ''the one free man'' but not free is a commentary on how games funnel you through their#stories while acting like the player character has any agency#gman's ability to teleport players around various environments and even to/from stasis is similar to how gamedevs load/unload characters#and teleport them around cutscenes and environments when the player cant see them#he gives them just enough freedom to feel natural while keeping tight control over their purpose in the story he is telling. like an author#SIMILARLY. this is why you can't do myhouse.wad again#part of the horror of myhouse.wad is the familiarity of it and the subtle offputting changes from standard doom mapping FOR DOOM PLAYERS#even down to how it was released#it isnt just a silly meta internet horror game everything about it was purpose-built to send goosebumps specifically to doom modders and#classic doom enthusiasts#ANYWAYS. ARMADA IS LIKE THIS TO ME#behind all the anime nonsense and the like 20 filler episodes in the start there's a genuinely clever commentary on like#transformers as a franchise and as a story that keeps getting retold#THERE'S MORE TO IT THAN THAT BUT YOU GET MY POINT.
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Every day I get closer to making an unhinged behemoth of a post listing all of the things about Kaeya and his possible connections to mythology & stuff that I notice but NOBODY ELSE SEEMS TO BRING UP IN THEIR THEORIES
(edit: OMG I reached the tag limit I'm so sorry)
#genshin impact#kaeya alberich#the unhinged behemoth of a post would also include all the reasons I DON'T think Kaeya is up to anything nefarious#if I see 1 more “kaeya will betray us” or “kaeya is allied with the abyss” theory ISTG I'm gonna break something#also WHY. WHY IS NOBODY AND I MEAN NOBODY MENTIONING THE POSSIBILITY THAT#EVEN IF KAEYA IS WORKING “WITH” THE ABYSS ORDER#IT'S AS A DOUBLE AGENT?!?!!?#LIKE HE'S GETTING INTEL FROM THEM FOR THE PURPOSE OF FEEDING IT TO THE KNIGHTS OR TO DILUC OR SOMETHING#AND HE'S ALSO STABBING THE ABYSS ORDER IN THE BACK#IT'S A SNEAKY TACTIC THAT'S NOT EXACTLY HONOURABLE AND PUTS HIM VERY MUCH IN HARM'S WAY BUT IT'S FOR THE SAKE OF KEEPING PEOPLE SAFE#HOW IS THAT NOT THE MOST KAEYA THING EVER?!?!?#WHY AM I SEEMINGLY THE ONLY ONE THINKING ABOUT THIS?!?!?!#I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS#also why is no one bringing up Kaeya's possible connections to king Arthur???#I mean HELLO?! secret possible royal lineage raised as a ward/foster child/adopted child of a noble family alongside an older brother?!!#and why aren't more people talking about Kaeya's connections to Lord Krishna???#again spirited away from his actual family to be raised in another family alongside an older brother figure who has less chill than him???#not to mention peacock feather imagery and being pitted against an evil uncle#if you believe that Clothar is Kaeya's uncle rather than a direct ancestor#there is so much more I could bring up and I'm not even an expert in any of this nor am I the best at research#but I should probably save those for an actual post#plus I don't want to flood these tags more than I have#I have so so so many things to say about Kaeya#he lives in my heart rent free he makes me feel and think so much he is truly the most beloved of all my beloveds#truly the blorbo of all time for me#if even 1 person expresses interest in all my theory-esque thoughts on Kaeya I will have won at life#this is an invitation guys please ask me to talk more about kaeya
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I have no new art as always except maybe this drawpile doodle of quark that I like. Hi. And goodbye I guess if I disappear for another month or two.
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#art#Tagging archival purposes this is more just a ‘Hey! How are you! I’m alive!’ post while life beats my ass once again.#I am trying desperately to have some time to do some comics or stuff but I’m also my own biggest hater so it has not been working well!#I say this to everyone though if you have the time and you want to create something you should do it no matter what….#You will enjoy life much more if you are creating methinks.#Anyways uhhh see ya. I have projects I need to do. I will try my best to have a post again soon 💔
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Obviously, I can't ignore the funny pics of AFO either
AFO getting insulted for the first time on the web be like:
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He looks like his fingers would be flying across a keyboard if he were on the internet.
AFO went and made himself into a troll face, man.
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"MOMMY LOOK AT WHAT I FOUND!"
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YEAH BOY, YOU LOOK REAL WEIRD BUT YEAH! RAISE YOUR TROPHY
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MA! AN ALLIGATOR GOT INTO THE TRAILER AGAIN!
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AFO's that arm being pummeled into the ground.
[All Might Doesn't Know How to Fucking Hold Back Against Kids: Case 47]
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Feat. Accidentally twink-ifying AFO to the point he's become a twig
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NEWS: AFO fails again, "Desperately trying to play it cool", All Might says, for at least the 3rd time in this fight
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AFO tried being so cool with the "Shigaraki—my other self" and failed instantly. Livestreamed all over the world. Ugggghhh. The embarrassmenttt
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Proceeds to split his face to smile, saying "I'll have to do the legwork myself".
As if to them, he didn't just go "Watch me do this. Come now, my other self. ........ I'll have to do it myself."
"Look how cool I am" *fails* "I CAN DO IT PROPERLY I MEAN IT"
He flip-flopped so hard here that if it were me, I'd give All Might the finishing blow to end me of my embarrassment. The world saw it. My life is over
AFO's ego is just so big and he's trying so hard to play it cool and keep his pride in his fight.
As if he hasn't been running around half-naked in a cape this whole time
#ik ik my sense of humor is bad#the alligator is a monsters inc reference#afo#all for one#bnha#mha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#all might#toshinori yagi#spoilers#i said in the prev post tags that i wasnt going to stroke his ego#afo is actually a loser (affectionate)#afo: I DIDNT KILL YOICHI.#kudo: yes you did.#afo: *cries and kills kudo*#afo: *hates kudo so much for reminding him that he kills kudos bloodline and goes crazy at someone who looks like him*#afo later: they were crocodile tears so i could manipulate you#afo: *fails instantly on live television* oh well. *tries playing it cool* i'll just do it MYSELF!#yoichi: *dies a second time*#afo: *rises from another death just bc of that* Mine last kin hath been shattered liketh the fine shards that rain of a glass window#afo: gray is thy world that mine brother has departed from yet again. the purpose in life and this plane we call existence hath been#stripped like a nail stuck too crookedly. mother this world hath proven truly unjust and I Shall Throw A World-Shattering Tantrum™#image limit
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day 25: karma 3
to love life through companionship
#rain world#rw art month#rw hunter#hunter rw#rw survivor#survivor rw#rw monk#monk rw#rw honeystickfam#i was gonna do something a little more grand for this but. too caught up w the pearls piece#this simple thingy works nicely anyway#i have a Lot of feelings abt hunter and karma 3#both in the context of my interpretations of canon and my au#but for purposes of this drawing. hunter only living for these younger slugcats who picked her off the ground and gave her a reason to#and then slowly but surely learning to love herself again and enjoy every little bit of life she has#i fuckign love hunter
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