#my family is annoyed by me as well since they dont understand what is going on with me.. again
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skybluekoneko · 9 months ago
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I'm so full of anger. I just want to cry or scream or break everything in my vicinity. I guess the anger is mainly frustration deep down, but that doesn't change the fact that I feel so hateful towards myself and the entire world.
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sky-high-standards · 1 year ago
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Yandere Master x Female Slave Reader
(Warning read your own risk and if you don't like it remember I warned you)
You where a slave of a very wealthy master who treated his slaves very well.
It was a peaceful life you did house work and looked after the pets and you were extremely lucky to have a kind master but the one downside to this peaceful life was Marcus your masters nephew who came to visit his uncle every summer.
Marcus treated the slaves terribly and unfortunately you had to serve him when ever he came, but as the years went by Marcus started to warm up to you.
Marcus: Hey slave come here, lets play house I'm the husband and you're the wife.
Y/n: Yes master.
Marcus: Just you wait when I get bigger I'm gonna make you my real wife.
You never understood why he would say such things to you but you would understand soon enough.
(You are 17 and Marcus is 19)
Summer finally came and Marcus along with it. Marcus had become very attractive over the years but you still saw him as your master's annoying nephew, but Marcus had seen you as much more than a slave.
Marcus: Hello y/n.
Y/n: Hello Mast-
Marcus: Please call me Marcus.
You gave him a confused look but complied.
As you worked you could feel Marcus's hawk like stare on you as if he was ready to pounce on you but you tried your best to ignore this but it only got worse from there, he would now touch you inappropriately and personal space was now nonexistent when he was around so you tried to avoid him but he always managed to find you.
Pretty soon it was clear to everyone that Marcus harassed you relentlessly exept your Master who was the one person who could stop this.
As you where walking down thd hall minding your own business when suddenly pushed you into a dark room and pinned you to the wall it took your eyes a minute to adjust and where surprised to see Marcus
Marcus: I cant hold back anymore I love you y/n I have ever since I was 6.
Y/n: What?
You didn't have time to react when he smashed his lips onto yours you tried to escape but his strong grip kept you in place, he only pulled apart when you were breathless. You took this opportunity to escape by stepping on his foot.
He yelled in pain and you ran straight to your master he told him about how Marcus had harassed you and he was not happy about it. He called Marcus in and they had a long conversation about it.
(Your masters name is Alfred)
Alfred: Marcus why Abuse my slave like this.
Marcus: Uncle you have now idea how much I love her and it took a great deal of strength to hold back for this long.
Alfred: Gasp a relationship between you two would be ridiculous and its clear she's not interested.
Marcus: She will learn to love me and don't care whether it's ridiculous or not.
Alfred: You will never lay a hand on her for as long as I live now go.
Marcus: You can't keep her away from me uncle!!!
Alfred: I said go.
After that Marcus didn't bother you for a while but good things dont last a week later your Master died of unknown causes and because he had no other family besides Marcus he got everything your master ownef including you.
From then on you were locked inside of the master bedroom where Marcus would "show you how much he loved you" if you know what I mean.
"My dear now you see I would even kill my own flesh and blood just to have you, now you belong to me."
Okay my lovely single pringles ik what ur thinking and ik i wrote this in grade 6 and i recently edited>
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ghostyeyestohide · 8 days ago
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Space & Time
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(I Put A Spell On You Part 2)
Pairing: Terrance (Foe) x Valerie (Plus Size Black Fem OC) x Junior (Foe) x Hen (Foe)
Warnings: Buildup (if you got the attention span of a squirrel, DONT READ), some bisexuality (from m and admission from f), caught kissing (bxb), panic attack, masturbation (m), moaning (m), tension, cussing, drinking, emotions, jealousy, angst, mentioning of climate change, mentioning of family (how they met), and Non-Canon.
Summary: Valerie and Terrance go to Junior and Hen’s for two nights, where tension builds up between the quartet, specifically Junior and Valerie.
Parts: Part One • Part Three
A/N: This was supposed to be the one where the threesome happens. But as I was writing this, I realize this is gonna be way too long for it to be one part, hence why I ended up turning this from being a three part series to a four part now. I think I made the best decision as this is like perfect development in my mind (and showing more of my style), so I hope you guys enjoy this one!
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do not copy or repost my work. I do not authorize it.
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Valerie adjusts the top of her blue milkmaid dress as the self driving car, carrying her and Terrance, wearing a matching color suit, drives down this empty road.
Surrounded by puddles and dirt, the climate had gotten increasingly worse over the years, the whole forest in the area died due to deforestation, leaving most towns baring it all in the worsing weather every year.
“Do we have to spend two nights? We’re only an hour away.” she asked, looking at him, who was working on his laptop.
“It’s mandatory since he’ll be home in 96 hours. It’s only just to wind him down so we’re prepared to shut him off.” he replied, not taking his eyes off the screen.
“And how is she handling it?” she asked, looking down the pan of rosemary-vanilla frosted honey pound cake she’s carrying in her lap.
“Not well. She’s still not understanding, but is accepting it slowly.”
“….how are you holding up?”
“……I had better days.” he sighed, trying to not let his emotions out.
She touches his thigh, gently rubbing it. He places his right hand on top of hers, squeezing it.
“You know you can tell me anything, right? I won’t say something you wouldn’t want to hear.”
He looks at her, giving her a small smile before bring her hand to place a kiss on it.
“I’m fine. I swear. It’s…..still brewing. But I think I’ve calm down a bit. He seems even more annoyed with me constantly taking notes and pictures, but I’m just doing my job.”
“Oh, I would know. I was so confused when you were doing that as her memories were being uploaded slowly into my head.” she says, chuckling as he rubbed her hand against his face.
“She was like that when we started the preparation for the trip too. Hated the scans, made sure I was noting what she believed was worth including, self conscious about how you were gonna come out…..” he replied, trailing off with the last word.
Terrance lets go of Valerie’s hand, turning his head back to his laptop. She looks ahead, placing her hand back on the pan, thinking if she made a mistake by mentioning her. He doesn’t get emotional about the accident anymore like he used to, but it’s still a soft spot since that was his wife he lost.
“Can you promise me something, Val?” he asked, breaking the silence.
“….depends on what is it.” she replied, looking at him again.
“Its nothing I would put you through. Unless you want to be.” he said, looking at her.
“I thought I can call the shots when you say that?”
He laughs before kissing her softly, grabbing her face in the process. She responds with kissing him back for a few seconds before pulling herself back.
“As much as I would like to take this to the next level, I don’t wanna drop this cake I worked hard on.” she said, lifting it slightly.
“Mmhm. But seriously: don’t reveal your true self to any of them when I’m not around. Its best to keep it private so they don’t freak out or try to do something that might have consequences for all of us. And watch what you say too. Understand?”
Valerie nods in agreement. He gently pushes a few strands of her hair out of her face as he shut his laptop, placing it in his suitcase.
“So where are we moving to now?” she asks.
“That is up in the air as I have requested if we stayed here permanently.” he replied, grabbing one of her hands and holding it in his lap.
“What? Why? We always traveled to the next one when the assignment is done.”
“You seem to enjoy living here more than the previous locations we were at.”
“How would you know? You were only with me a few times since we moved here.”
“Always remember that one of the things I do great at my job is taking notes. And since we’ve been living here, I noticed you feel more calmer, enjoying the quietness and darkness a lot. I mean, you do sit on the porch and crochet as you watch the stars bloom. I never hear you complain about being overheated, uncomfortable, squished in…I see everything, even when I’m focused on work.” he said, tracing his fingers over her hand.
“But you still have to travel to your next assignment. After you said you would never leave me alone out here ever.”
He smiled, making her look at him in a confused way.
“Except, I’m hoping I won’t be doing that much longer. See, OuterMore’s slogan always mention going to space to improve the future. While I do enjoy helping our customers with having a replica taking care of their spouse while the other is in space for two years, I want to move up in the company as I feel I have outgrown this.”
“Like what? Being a board member? CEO?”
“No, no.” he chucked. “A lab analyst. I’ll be looking at tests, data, new files, old files, watching them make the replicas, disabling the old ones, just to name a few.”
“So. Somewhat similar to what you do now, but you’re at the main headquarters?”
“No. I would be at the regional headquarters that’s on the opposite side of the airport we came in at. Which is a two hour drive, meaning I won’t be gone all day or too far from you, my love.” he said, rubbing her face.
Valerie smiled, blushing at the thoughts of them possibly settling down instead of worrying about where they’re going next.
“Hm. I like the sound of that.” she responded with, nudging her face on his shoulder.
“That’s why you have to hope they’ll approve it. I think they will with how much data I provided them with over these last few years. But, like I said about hiding your true self, keep this between us as well.”
“Understood.” she said, nodding slightly.
The couple sat in silence, caressing each other hands as the car turns on a road.
“We will be arriving to your destination in about five minutes.” said the voice of the car, starling Valerie.
“You have got to get use to the car.”
“Hush. I don’t ride in this usually!”
Terrance laughs as he rubs her hip, glaring out of the window as they get closer to Junior and Hen’s.
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A few minutes later, the car pulls into the driveway of a house on farm, with a man working on it, moving hay around. As it got closer, the man’s visibility becomes clearer, revealing him as Junior, who automatically gets annoyed as he looks at the car. Dressed in a white shirt, blue jeans, and brown boots, he drops the batch of hey from his hands, slowly walks over to them.
“He doesn’t seem to be in a good mood.” said Valerie as she looked at him.
“On cue as soon as he sees me.” said Terrance.
The car parks in front of the porch, turning itself off before unlocking the door and lifting it up. Terrance steps out first, sending a smile towards Junior before helping Valerie get out, fixing the bottom of her dress.
Soft stomps are heard before the front door swings open. Out comes a young, blond haired woman in a peach button top, a brownish plaid long skirt, and brown knee high boots. She looks at them with an emotionless stare, as if they are trespassing and should leave.
“Good to see you again, Junior and Hen.” said Terrance, gently pulling Valerie close to him.
“We don’t have a choice at this point, do we?” says Junior as he stands next to Hen. Terrance chuckles, nodding at the question.
“Patience is key. We still got a long way to go before you depart for your trip.”
“Well, you and your company hasn’t made it easy for us at all. Just different things every time you show up.” said Hen, looking at him.
“He’s just doing his job with getting everything that’s needed for the replica. He understands that you two are very upset about his selection to go to space and how you feel like you don’t have enough time before he goes, but at the end of the day, this is just his job’s requirements and probably wants to get this done faster so he can be out of your hair.” said Valerie, who is now visibly irritated.
Junior looks at her with curiosity as Hen gives her the death stare, making Val feel a bit uncomfortable.
“Oh, where are my manners! Junior and Hen, this is Valerie. My beautiful wife that I have mentioned quite a few times. She’ll be staying here as well as we do a couple more tests, if you don’t mind.” said Terrance, doing a ‘showing her off’ gesture, with Valerie smiling a little.
Hen nods as she looks at Junior, who is still looking at Valerie with curiosity in his face.
“Luckily, the room is big enough for the both of you and your things, so I don’t mind.” said Hen, forcing a smile.
“Excuse me?” asked Valerie.
“Not like that. I meant if you bought a bunch of suitcases for your things……or some random boxes from your husband’s job.” she said, shooting a look at Terrance.
“If it makes you feel any better, she only brought two.” said Terrance as he turned to take out her suitcases and his.
“As long as she’s not doing random tests or taking notes while watching me do anything, I don’t care.” said Junior.
“Makes you uncomfortable?” asked Valerie.
“A little. I tend to lose focus in whatever I’m doing.”
“….makes sense. You fit it well.”
Junior stares at her, slightly turning red, as Hen shoots her a look while Terrance stares at her in confusion.
“And what is that supposed to mean, Valerie?” she asked.
“Nothing. Just an observation. Tend to take after Terrance sometimes. A natural habit.” said Valerie, staring at Junior.
Terrance lets out a ‘hm’ sound before grabbing the suitcases and walking towards the door.
“Let’s go inside, shall we?” he said as he walks up the stairs.
The rest followed behind, with Hen running over to open the door and held it for Terrance and Valerie as they walked in, with Hen and Junior following.
After Terrance places their suitcases in their room, he comes back downstairs to the living room, where he takes a seat next to Valerie as Hen sat in one of the chairs while Junior stands, pacing back and forth.
“So. Do you often spend the night or…nights at his assignment’s house?” asked Hen.
“When I was first accompanying him, yes. But, I guess after he completed enough assignments, they started paying for any place we wanted to live at as he worked. That’s been our routine ever since. But, this is also my first time doing this again.” said Valerie as she looked at Terrance, who smiles back at her.
“So….are you in a different city when he accepts a new assignment after he completes the previous or you two move immediately?” asked Junior, who now takes a seat in the other chair.
“The latter. It’s important that the partner/spouse of the agent stays with them as they wait for the two years to go by, examining whatever’s going on up there close by at home.”
“OuterMore takes it seriously. They too can feel when our workers might feel lonely as they travel.” said Terrance.
“Hm. They understand that, but doesn’t seem anything wrong with randomly selecting people to get put on a rocket ship and sent to space as a replica operates their daily lives as if they’re the actual person.” said Junior, looking at Terrance.
“Junior.” Hen whispered.
“What? It’s not like I’m lying cause it’s not fucking normal and he acts like it is!” he said as he stands up, very heated. Valerie thought ‘hothead’ to herself, noticing a common trait she sees in Terrance’s subjects when talking about this.
“It’s for a better future for the planet. You seen the videos, my explanation, and the many success stories that came out of it. I say it’s very normal as the government approves it.” said Terrance, watching him pace back and forth.
“And you’re fine with what he’s doing? Coming in the middle of the night, telling strangers they been selected to space, disappearing for a while, and then suddenly returns, saying “we need to your measurements, memories, looks, what time you eat, how you shit, how you eat for your replica” constantly? Then when it’s all over, you move onto the next? That’s normal for you, Valerie? Your agent husband rolling into strangers’ house with a deal of a lifetime as you sit home, being oblivious?” he said, standing a few feet from the couple.
Valerie looks at him with a glare in her, processing what he just said to her.
“Junior, that’s enough! That is not how we welcome guests into our home!” said Hen as she got up, staring very anger at him.
“She’s not a guest. Just someone who follows everything he tells her to do.”
Valerie chuckles quietly, trying to find the right words to say without making this moment even worse.
“That is not how you talk to a wo…” Terrance attempts to get up to confront him, but she pulls him down, signaling him to not doing anything that might get him in trouble.
“You know…..I knew it was going to be you, and I mean specifically you, that was going to utter that.” she said, looking at Junior.
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah. You think everything is perfectly fine here, but don’t realize the people you love are suffering around you. But I’m the oblivious one here?”
“Because everything is fine. I’m fine. Hen’s fine. The house is fine. All of this here? Definitely not.”
“Hen is definitely not fine. You just ignored her pleading to stop. In fact, you ignore everything she wants because you think being home and away from downtown is what makes life worth living.” she said as she stands up, placing the cake on the table.
“Valerie, baby, don’t.” mumbles Terrance as he tries to pull her down, but she snatches her arm.
“Oh, so we’re telling secret information to people that shouldn’t be knowing, Terrance? I thought you valued that.” said Junior as he stepped closer, but Hen pushes him back, mumbling “Stop!”.
“He does because he didn’t tell me. The notes on the file did. At least he knows how to value something instead of blowing it off for their own needs.”
“Valerie….” said Terrance, looking at her.
“Oh, so now it’s my own needs?” asks Junior.
“Yeah. Your own needs since you can’t please Hen’s.” says Valerie.
“Please stop.” said Hen, looking at her. Valerie shakes her head before gently moving Hen out of the way to stand in front of Junior.
“No, cause what we’re not gonna do here is let Junior walk all over you, me, and him because he hasn’t found his happiness yet. Which is why he’s very angry, dismissive about everything, and if anything, too possessive. So tell me. What are you hiding behind this tough guy persona, Junior?” she says as she gets in Junior’s face.
Junior looks her up and down, before glancing at Terrance, who sends a glare back at him. Junior leans near her ear, lowering his voice.
“You know he’s been spending a lot of time with my wife, right? Secret meetings, going in town for something, helping her out. You don’t find that worrying? Your husband being around another woman that’s not you?” he whispers.
Valerie looks back at Terrance, who is slowly getting angry and stands up.
“….I’m not dumb and I think you know that. If anything, you should be very cautious with your behavior because I know everything that she doesn’t know. Mentally, physically, and sexually. Especially that night.” she whispers back, glaring at him.
“You wouldn’t dare.”
“Is that a threat? Or is this your way of getting something you want from him?” she asks in her normal voice.
“Why you little….” he says, getting even more close to her.
Hen and Terrance look at each other before getting between the both of them, separating them. Junior reacts by flipping the chair and storming out, starling Hen. Terrance shakes his head before looking at Valerie, who looks down in an impertinent way.
“I told you to watch your mouth.” he says.
“Nothing gets better if you let someone like him walk over you.”
“He’s just uncomfortable.” said Hen.
“Well, he needs to grow up and be a man.”
“That’s just how he is!” she said, now extremely pissed.
“Oh well. This will all be over soon anyway. Oh, and I made this cake for you guys, if you give a damn.” said Valerie as she picks up the pan and carries it to the kitchen.
“Val!” said Terrance.
“Gee, thanks. That will go well with whatever we’re eating after I go grocery shopping as soon as I find Junior!” she yelled, storming out the house.
Valerie rolls her eyes before placing the pan on the counter. Suddenly, she feels a painful sensation from her stomach, causing her to fall on her knees and clenching it as she lets out a painful groan. Terrance rushes over, kneeling down to lift her up.
“Where does it hurt at?! Locate it to me!” he says.
She grabs his hand and places it over her stomach, breathing harshly. The area has a warm feeling that kept rising until it went away, along with the sensation. He stares in confusion, looking up at her, who now had an uneasy expression on her face.
“Seems like you were overheating a bit, but it went away.” he said, rubbing his hand over to check other areas.
“I probably need to rest. My tab is still half full, so I’ll be fine until tomorrow night.” she mumbled, slowly becoming tired.
“I’ll carry you to the room. But I might be gone by the time you wake up. Get some rest, sweetheart…” he says, watching her fall asleep in his arms before carrying her up the stairs.
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A few hours later, Valerie wakes up, breathing hoarsely. She sits up, looks around the low sun setted room, realizing that this is their bedroom. She turns to her nightstand, which has a glass of water, a pill, and a note, written by Terrance, that says:
“Take this when you wake up. It should calm down the shocks and whatever else is aching. Me and Junior went in town to do the grocery shopping for Hen and find something to eat for dinner since it will be little too late to cook. Behave yourself while I’m gone.
- T. “
She smiles, shaking her head at the last part before placing the pill in her mouth and washing it down with the water. She gets up, stretching herself out, before walking towards the window. She looks at the empty ground, with some puddles sparking from the blueish-purple sunset.
She thought about how peaceful it is out here. Not having to hear loud traffic, feeling overstimulated by people moving around, arguing, having sex, loud music overflowing your sounds. Just simply doing anything you like without having to worry about anything.
Walking out with her book, ‘Parable of the Sower’ by Octavia E. Butler, to indulge in the view of the growing night sky, she sees Hen lying on a massive branch, looking out in the distance. She calmly walks up, waves at her before taking a seat about a few feet away on the stump.
There’s silence between the two women for a few minutes before Hen looks down at her, watching her read quietly.
“What are you reading?” she asked, making her break out of her focus.
“Parable of the Sower. It tells a fictional story of a girl growing up in her poor stricken gated community as the world is going to chaos during the 2020s Los Angeles. She wrote this about 30 years before it actually happened, and before our time. Basically predicting it.” said Valerie as she showed the book to her in a better view.
“Like what?”
“Well. Climate change, the economic crisis, social inequality, inflation, escape from forced slavery, useless government, the collapse of cities by its citizens. Just to name the important details. Ms. Butler unfortunately didn’t live long enough to see it actually happen.”
“Wow. That’s a lot of predictions to get right.”
“Yeah. He got this for me when we were staying in Los Angeles for his assignment at the time. Said I would like it since I tend to read books like this. And he wasn’t wrong.” she says, smiling a little. It was one of her favorite things about him: getting her things he knows she would like.
“Were you downtown?”
“Not really. We stayed Hidden Hills. His assignment lived on Mulholland Drive, so he wasn’t too far from me.”
“Must be hard being alone all day.”
“Oh, that depends on where we’re at. I sometimes visit historic places on my own, go to the grocery store, shopping sometimes, or just drive around. With his awareness, of course.”
“He’s not bothered with you doing that?”
Valerie makes a confused face before looking Hen, who is still laying down.
“No. Terrance encourages me to explore the areas we’re around instead of waiting for him. If I’m comfortable with doing that. And then, he wants to hear about it or see it, incase I bought something, when he comes home because he doesn’t like being the only one explaining what he did today.”
“…..and what do you do for a living?” she asks as she sits up, keeping her eyes on her.
“Stay-at-home wife. I read, I crochet, I cook sometimes, bake a lot, clean if the place is messy, relax, listen to music on our vinyl player, and sleep in if I’m too lazy to do anything.”
Hen stares at her, at a loss for words with the information she gave her. Valerie, in her head, is thinking “wow, he’s keeping her locked up and she’s letting him for his love”, about to continue reading her book before she heard her laugh.
“Something funny, Hen?” she asks, looking at her again.
“That sounds like you’re using him. And he’s falling for it.” Hen replies slyly.
“Excuse me?”
“You do anything you want as long as he’s okay with it while he works? He wants to hear about your day so he’s not the only one talking? Showing him stuff you bought and he doesn’t get upset?”
“Why would he be upset if I told him what I did and he’s aware? He likes hearing me talk about anything even if I didn’t do nothing and if I have concerns or I’m not happy, he wants to hear it so he can reassure me or find a solution. Not just give up.”
“Oh, I find that very hard to believe he would be doing all of that for you.” she scoffs, looking away.
Valerie looked at her in an appalling way, couldn’t believe she’s accusing her of lying about what her and Terrance do after a long day. She shakes her head, getting up to leave, but stops and turns around.
“You know….envy doesn’t look good on you when you’re the one causing it. Because you’re the only who’s trying to save your marriage here, it doesn’t mean you have to put me down to get me to suffer in your misery.” she states, glaring at her.
“Oh, fuck you, Valerie. Pretending traveling all over the country so he can get information to make replicas of people going to space to replace their home life while you do absolutely nothing is not normal. Waste of time if anything!” she responded, not looking at her.
“Oh? But….you’re the one….who wants to explore, right? You’re the one with the idea of walking out on him, leaving him in an envelope with a letter that has nothing written, just to show how you thought of your relationship.”
Hen looks up, with a scowl on her face. Valerie smiles evilly, leaning forward.
“Yeah. I heard that part in the files. You two both come from sad backgrounds, it’s amazing you lasted this long.”
“And you think you and Terrance are gonna last longer?”
“We have. Hence why I’m here, right? He loves his job and loves taking care of me because he actually loves me. And you hate that. Cause Junior loves you, but not how you want him to. And that’s why you’re reacting the way you are because when the real one comes back, it’s not gonna be the same. Just this replica is willing to try to make you happy, I’ll give him that.”
“You don’t know me. You only know what I told your husband. That’s why you think you can stand there, give advice something you have no idea about. Just taking after his writing and whatever else included…..Junior’s right. You do follow everything he does because you have nothing to go home to after you’re done using him. I feel sorry for you, having to adjusting things to his liking.” Hen says, shaking her head.
Valerie’s jaw drops, in shocked at what she said to her. None of this is true, but watching Hen’s anger towards Junior make her believe that she’s using Terrance because she has nothing for herself just woke up something inside her that she didn’t have: overwhelmed anger. She walks back slow, keeping her glare up.
“I understand that you want to explore things that he won’t let you do because he’s afraid of losing you, hence why you’re taking it out on me and Terrance. I would suggest leaving him, but based on how you two met and looking around…….can’t really do much. But I’ll leave you with this: slap him one more time and I’ll fuck you up.” she uttered before storming off, walking to the house.
As she gets closer, Junior’s truck, with him and Terrance inside, pulls up. The men get out the car to unload the bags of groceries from the back when they see Valerie walking, not noticing her anger all over her.
“Hey baby. I see you’re enjoying the beautiful night sky out here.” said Terrance as he pulls down the tailgate and grabs a few bags.
“Your wife’s a bitch, Junior!” she yells, walking past them and onto the porch, swings the door open, and walks inside.
Both men look at each other, very confused on what just happened before resuming getting the bags.
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Valerie is sitting on the couch on the porch, reading Parable of the Sower, with the hanging bulbs being used as her lights.
Soft steps are heard until the front door opens, with Terrance walks out, carrying a tray of food and drinks.
“Hey.” he says, gently walking over.
“Hey.” she replies, not looking at him.
“I thought you might’ve been hungry and a little thirsty, so I brought you dinner.” he says as he places the tray on the table before sitting next to her. She looks at it, moving her book to the side.
“We decided on burgers from this local place, so I got you your favorite: a Spicy Jack burger with jalapeños, pepper jack cheese, chipotle mayo, sautéed onions, lettuce, and no tomato & pickles, of course. I wasn’t sure if you wanted the spicy seasoning on your fries, so I asked them to put it on the side. And I got you a Sprite. I just got a regular American and a Coke. Hope you like it.” he said as he places her drink and plate in front of her.
“Thanks, but I’m not that hungry right now.” she replied, going back to her book.
“That’s fine. Just don’t let it get cold.” he says, beginning to eat his food.
She nodded, still reading the page. There was silence for a few minutes, with the sounds of Valerie turn a page occurring a few times. Terrance watches her for a few moments, taking in her be focused on reading.
“…what happen between you and Hen while we were out?” he asked, laying back in his seat.
“Nothing.” she replied, not looking at him.
“You sure?”
“Very.”
“So why are you being dismissive?”
“….I can’t read after I said I’m not hungry?” she replied, now looking at him.
“I didn’t say that. I’m just saying…..you’re normally talkative. Asking me things. Just….being you.”
“Well, what if I’m not in the mood to be that right now?” she said, going back to her book.
Terrance frowns at that response, looking out in the opening as he thought about his next move that won’t make her mad.
“….did you two do something that you regret? I wouldn’t be mad if that was case, considering you know. We can always erase it.” he says letting out a small laugh.
Valerie, now anger, throws the book on the ground and stands up. She walks in front of the table, pacing back and forth before turning to him.
“Why the fuck would you assume we hooked up while you and hothead were out? Hm? She’s not even my type! Just because you got attracted to her husband, it’s doesn’t mean I’m going for the wife and I hope that’s not what you’re trying to get me to do.” she said, staring very angry at him.
“Valerie, I wasn’t being—“
“Serious? Because wow, that’s a terrible thing to joke about with me. I would never, ever lay next to someone as miserable as she is and you are a disgusting asshole for that…..”
Her voice trails at the end as she leans on the pillar. Suddenly, her chest begins beating fast, creating a painful sensation that it hurts for her to breath. She places her hand on it, trembling onto her knees as Terrance got and races over to her fast.
“Breathe…breathe….breathe.” he whispers to her as he holds her, mimicking a ‘inhale/exhale’ motion.
She follows, wheezing each time as the sensation slowly went away and her breathing was back to normal. Then, she cries, collapsing into him. He pulls her into an embrace, holding her tight as she cried into his chest, letting it all.
“What did she do? Cause this is not normal for you to be crying over and I’m getting very worried.”
She looks up, wiping her tears as she sniffles.
“She said….I’m using you because I have nothing to….to go back to once “this” is done.” she said in weak voice.
“Oh, baby…..” he mumbles, cuddling her.
“I know it’s not true and it’s stupid to throw a fit about…but, my god, it stings! People are so cruel and for what?!”
“It’s just a rough time for them. Just give them some space and they will be apologizing.”
“Fuck their apology.”
“You don’t have to accept it. I’m not gonna force you.”
Valerie lays against his chest, trancing her left hand over his chest before looking at him again.
“How are you so calm about this?” she asks, slightly sniffling.
“I’m used to it.” he shrugs. “If I break, they’re gonna use that as an advantage to do it again and I don’t want. Which is what you need to adapt. Don’t let what Junior and Hen get under your skin more than it should or else, you’re going to be stuck in an endless cycle with it. Ok?”
She nods. He smiles at her before kissing her nose, carefully helping her up and walking back over to the couch, sitting the both of them down.
“Please eat. I don’t want you going to sleep on an empty stomach.” he says, sliding her plate over a bit with her drink.
She smiles a bit before picking up her burger and biting into it. She moans as it still tasted very warm, even after her outburst a few moments ago.
“We have one more night and this will all be over for you.” he says as he picks up her book and places it on the table. He watches her eat as he peered into the window behind him, slightly locking eyes with Junior for a few minutes before he broke them and looked at Hen, who was drinking.
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Valerie is sleeping in the bed with Terrance, constantly moving around as she’s having a nightmare about being separated from him after OuterMore found he violated the policy by sleeping with a subject.
As she’s being held down to the ground by guards while Terrance attempts to get to her while being handcuffed and screaming her name, a man walks up with a needle in his hand. Just as he kneels down in front of her, he begs the man to leave her alone, just take me only. The man ignores, raising the needle high up, and as he is about to inject her..
She wakes up, breathing shakily. Doing the motion he showed her early, she relaxes, with each exhale bringing her back to normal. She looks over at him, who was peacefully knocked out, his light snores filling the quietness of the room.
Feeling very dry in her throat, she quietly gets up and puts on her robe before opening the door carefully and slowly walks down the stairs, not wanting to wake anyone up.
She looks both ways before walking into the kitchen, noticing no one’s around. Opening the cabinet door carefully, she takes out a tall glass before walking to the fridge. Opening the door, she grab the pitcher of water and carefully pours it in her glass, filling it until it’s enough. She takes a sip, releasing a quiet moan as the coolness and wetness hit the back of her throat.
As she turns to walk back up to her room, she hears a sound from the living room. She peers in, looking to see if anything catches her eye. “Nothing.” she said in her mind, turning back to the stairs.
“Fuck.” moaned a familiar voice, very quietly.
Looking back in the room, she scans the room once more before landing her eyes on something bewildering that she gasped.
In the one of the living room chairs laid Junior, whose eyes were closed, but his hands? Stroking himself as the moon shined on him. Recreating a scene Valerie saw weeks earlier where he was stroking himself as he watched her and Terrance make love. As much as she was slowly getting aroused by this, guilt filled her mind quickly and she had to do something or it will be very awkward if Hen or Terrance woke up and saw this.
“Junior?” she said, loud enough but not too loud that it wakes everyone up.
Junior opens his eyes, looks at Valerie, and immediately stands up quickly to pulls his shorts up, trying to make this situation less awkward, but failed. He chuckles shyly, not trying to look at her.
“Whatever you saw me doing……you didn’t see.” he says.
Valerie chuckles before walks up the stairs to her room, quietly closing the door, leaving Junior feeling embarrassed.
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A few hours later, Valerie wakes up again. This time, the sun is beaming into the room. She blinks slowly, running her eyes before letting out a big yawn. She touches behind her to see if Terrance was still in bed, only for cold emptiness to hit her hand. She frowns, hoping he was still in bed.
Rising up, she grabs a washcloth and bath towel before walking to the bathroom to shower. After rinsing her body and wrapping it in the towel, she heads back to their room, taking out a long, cream colored, leg slit crochet dress that had an off-the-shoulder top that she made when they were first starting to see each other. After oiling her body, putting sunscreen on, placing her curls in a half up-half down hairdo, and grabbing her crochet bag, she heads down the stairs to sit on the porch and make something.
Just as she’s about to pass the kitchen, a cinnamon sugar scent hits her nose. She walks in, where she sees Terrance chopping onions as Hen was stuffing the turkey with vegetables. She clears her, causing the both of them turn and look at her.
“Oh! Good morning—well, afternoon, Valerie. We didn’t hear you walk in.” he said, walking up to kiss her. “No issues with anything?”
Valerie shakes her head ‘no’ before kissing him, watching him walk back to his position as she looks at the uncooked food spread out across the kitchen.
“Assuming you two are making dinner?” she asks.
“Yeah. Just a simple roasted turkey, mac and cheese, collard greens, rice, mashed potatoes, and cornbread.” said Hen, not looking at her.
“Huh. You may be miserable but you got exquisite taste in food. I’ll give you that.” said Valerie, very amused at the menu.
“Valerie.” said Terrance, eyeing her with a “please drop it” look as Hen scoffs loudly.
“Well. Ima go sit on the porch and crochet a new piece while y’all cook. Its suppose to be very hot, so I thought it would be a perfect weather to sit out and do something.” she said as she turned to leave.
“You’re not gonna eat? I made you some pancakes, scrambled eggs, and some turkey scrapple since we don’t eat pork.” he said as he opened the oven and took out the plate, handing it to her.
“Oh. I didn’t think y’all saved me anything since I woke up late.” she said, gently taking the plate out of his hands.
“No? I always make sure you eat, even if you’re last. Did you want water or OJ?” he asks as he places a fork and knife on the plate.
“I’ll do a water.”
“Hen, do you mine pouring her a glass?”
“No worries.” she replies, taking out a cup before heading to grabbed the pitcher.
“Hothead not up?” Valerie whispers, making sure Hen doesn’t her farm.
“Working on the farm. He seemed a little off today.” Terrance replies in a whisper tone.
“Technically, he is…that.”
“Yeah, but…..he was being nice? He’s not usually like that.”
“Hm.”
Hen walks over to hand her the glass of water, but Terrance takes it from her.
“I’ll carry this for her. Thank you though.”
Hen nods before walking back to the turkey. Terrance walks to the front door and opens it, with Valerie walking out and over to the couch, placing the plate on the table before sitting down and placing the crochet bag next to her. Terrance hands her the water and kisses her forehead before walking back in.
After finishing her breakfast, she began crocheting her new piece: a sun shaped cone bra with a cloud hanging between. Using the colors, yellow, white, and orange to create a three colored pattern, she begins her piece, moving at a modern pace so she doesn’t mess up.
As she’s doing that, she looks up and sees Junior doing work on the farm. From sweeping up the hay to moving wood logs around, he seemingly focused a lot on cleaning, amusing Valerie a lot. After finishing up, he sees her sitting on the porch, working on her piece.
Cautiously, he walks over, taking a seat on the edge of the porch floor, his back facing her. She doesn’t notice him sitting there until he clears his throat and she looks up.
“Hello, Junior.” she says.
“Good afternoon to you as well.” he replies.
“I see you were working hard out there.”
“Oh really?”
“Mmhm. Seems exhausting trying to keep something clean just for it to get messy by the next day.”
“Yeah. That’s farm life for you.” he says, letting out a stifled chuckle.
She nods, looking down to resume crocheting her bra. There’s an awkward silence between the two for a few moments before Junior turns to face her.
“I wanted to apologize for not only last night, but my behavior towards you yesterday.”
She looks at him, moving her hook and bra to the side.
“I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did since you are only his wife that travels with him on these…..assignments as he calls them. We were talking yesterday as we drove into town and he was explaining everything about you and….I realize you are adored a lot by him. He’s mentioned you a few times since being here, but I never seen him talk about you in a captivating way that it slowly made me think that….maybe I do need to listen to things Hen wants and not put my needs above hers. And maybe this trip to space will save us in the end because I could come back a better husband and caretaker for her instead of fearing of losing her permanently. But, I do apologize and hope you can accept it.” he says, giving her a genuine look
Impressed by this apology from him, she smiles as she thinks of a response. But, the growing guilt of knowing that less than 72 hours from now, the real Junior will be home to rightfully take back his spot, settles in. She feels bad that she can’t tell him, but having the nightmare of being taken away keeps that reminder in tact.
“And, I should check my surroundings before I start pleasuring myself.” he adds, making the both of them laugh.
“Well…..I do accept your apology as it seems very genuine. But, if you’re thinking about taking what Hen wants seriously, you need to do it now before it’s too late. Life’s too short to be distant with each other all the time.”
“Thank you, Val.”
“No problem.”
He gets up and walks to the door. But before he opens it, he looks at Val again.
“….what happen between you last night? You were very….explosive with the bitch part.” he asks.
“All I can say is my intelligence was insulted, which hurts my feelings. And I can careless if her ass gives an apology.” she said, sighing in the process.
“…..I’ll talk to her when she’s done prepping dinner with him. I don’t want your last night here being ruined by what happened yesterday. And I do wanna try that cake you made.”
Valerie laughs, making Junior smile before walking inside the house. Wow. What a change of heart, she thought, resuming work on her piece.
Hours go by and Valerie finishes the bra, which came out very nice and fitted perfectly for her chest. She walks in the house and lays on the couch, deciding to take a hour nap since dinner was currently baking in the oven as Terrance and Junior were upstairs, doing another session. And Hen was….well, Hen.
She was peacefully sleeping when she felt someone gently shaking her, making her open her eyes. As her eyes unblurred, she can tell person in front of her was Hen, now dressed in a red and brown pattern dress.
“Sorry for waking you up. Dinner’s ready and I was wondering if you can go get the men while I set up?” she said, walking back to kitchen.
“Yeah….I’ll get them.” said Valerie, letting out a stretch before getting up and walking upstairs.
She gently knocks on the door, patiently waiting for Terrance to greet her.
No response.
She knocks again, a little louder, thinking this will get his attention.
Once again, nothing.
“Terrance? Junior? Is everything okay in there?” she asks, putting her ear against the door to hear.
Nothing. No movement, no sound, just silence.
She grabs the doorknob, turns it, and hears an unlock sound, signaling it’s not locked. She pushes the door open and walks in.
“Hey, Hen wanted me to tell y’all that dinner is re…..”
Her voice trails off, in shocked at what she sees.
On the bed, against the wall opposite to the window, was Junior and Terrance, passively making out with and rubbing on each other. Junior looks up, sees her standing there, and breaks away, backing up in fear.
“Why did you sto….” Terrance asks, slowly turning his head to see what he’s looking at.
Startled by Valerie’s presence, he gets up slowly, placing his hands in front to calm her.
“Baby, its not what it looks lik—“
“Dinner is ready. She doesn’t want the food to get cold.” she blurted out with a forced smile on herself, holding back tears.
Afterwards, she storms out, slamming the door behind her. She leans against the hallway banister, silent crying. All of those happy memories of them begin playing in her head. From the day they met to their wedding day to romantic dates to making love…..all just coming in to wash over her broken heart.
Wiping her tears, she walks downstairs, heading to the dining room where Hen was placing the turkey in the middle with the rest of the food.
“They….should be down…soon.” she said, clearing her throat as she sat down.
“…..you okay?” she asks, looking at her.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Why?”
“I don’t know. You seen a little…..flustered?”
“I’m fine, Hen. Really….fine.”
Loud movement is heard before both men entered the room, cautiously pretending they didn’t get caught. Junior walks over to Hen and kisses her head as Terrance sits next to Valerie, gently brushing past her.
“Okay, so we should be ready. I’m just trying to figure out what am I forgetting.” said Hen.
“Drinks, plates, and utensils.” said Junior, looking at the table.
“Shit. I knew it was something important!”
“Come on. I’ll help you get it.” he said, pulling her into the kitchen, leaving Terrance and Valerie alone.
Silence fills the room as Valerie turns away, not wanting to see him.
“So…..when do you want to file to end this? After they approve you?” she asks with a cold tone in her voice.
“Don’t say that.” he replies, turning her seat to face him.
“What? You don’t like the sound of it? Being a divorcee? You don’t mind behaving like one.”
Terrance pulls her seat even closer, bringing down the distance between them. He leans forward, placing his hands on her thighs.
“You know….you’re acting the way she did when we butted heads. Distant. Insults. Not wanting to look at me. Sometimes slapping me if I said something wrong. But, I deserved it. Just like how I deserve you acting the way you are right now.”
“If this is your way of apologizing, you’re gonna have to try a lot harder.” she says, pushing his hands off.
“Which I am. You know I do. After everything we been through and yet, we’re still here.”
“For a reason I’m not gonna say cause I don’t want to hurt you. Hell, I don’t even want to hurt me!” she said, her voice beginning to crack.
Terrance leans back, sniffling a little as he hands her a napkin, with her taking it.
“I don’t know it’s because she never felt this whenever y’all were going through it or this is something else, but I just feel….not me. I don’t know if it’s because of what’s about to happen or I’m missing something that I want but can’t have…” she says, wiping her tears.
“Like what? Another person romantically? Being on your own?”
Valerie shakes her head, looking at him, who is now crying.
“….l can never be on my own. Or love someone else other than you, even if I tried. But I have no interest.”
“Then what do you think it is?”
“…..maybe it’s a memory I never seen that she wants me to unlock. Maybe I have to see something to get there.”
“I think I can help with that. I don’t know how, but I’ll try.”
“Do you think that’s enough?”
“I know it’s not. It just means I have to prove myself in order to earn your trust back.”
She looks away, wiping her face with the napkin as Terrance looks at her. She exhales, looking back at him.
“…..he was there.” she confessed.
“What?”
“The night we made love, when you asked if something was out there that I kept looking, it was him. Junior. He watched us.”
He lets out a surprise laugh, covering his mouth. He wipes his face as he looked to see if Hen and Junior were coming.
“What the hell……”
“And I liked it.”
“You’re telling me this now?”
“You kissed him. After telling me you had control over your urges. And I’m pretty sure that wasn’t the only time with the way you and him were going at it.”
He doesn’t respond, just nods. Confirming it. She rolls her eyes, not mad, just disappointed.
“….do you want him? Like in a romantic way?”
“No.”
“….me either.”
“But you want to fuck him.”
“……yes.”
“…….I’ll keep that in mind.” she replies, turning away from him.
He about to ask her what she meant when Hen and Junior walked back in with the missing items, placing them on the table.
“Sorry for the wait. We were debating which ones to bring out!” said Hen, putting plates in front of them.
“That’s fine. We’re just having a conversation.” said Terrance, fixing himself.
“Oh, is everything okay?” asked Junior, with a concerned look on his face.
Terrance and Hen look at Valerie, who feels the pressure building.
“Yeah, Junior. Everything is fine.” she replies, smiling at him.
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A/N II: trouble in paradise? or is the paradise about to cause some steamy trouble in the bedroom? A little long, but I liked it! Part 3 should be out some time next week, but have a good night/day everyone 🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
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Taglist: @urfavblackbimbo @blyffe @literallegendicon
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swanshapedheart · 5 months ago
Text
Poorlittlekoi’s statement
Disclaimer. I, the poster, am not Koi
I am someone putting her thoughts and response to her situation into the public as I was encouraged to do so. I feel it is also necessary to bring this up as well.
I do not want to be affiliated with controversy any further.
——————————————————-
“this whole situation has messed with my head to the point where i cant even send a text to most people without worrying they are gonna leak it or use it against me in the future,, svlvnsore was just bored and found me really annoying shown in screenshot one…. not only that they also called me out for heavily referencing or tracing when they reposted an artpiece thats doing the same thing. Svlvn said they are on my ass because i didnt credit who i referenced, when the person they reposted didnt do the same either proof in screenshot two three and four. Another thing i caught on to is that they SPECIFICALLY said they didnt care that i self harmed or did horrible things to myself when they posted about me. i have anxiety, i overthink! of course im going to do bad things to myself, im mentally unwell. proof in screenshot 5… and for screenshot 6, this is only an assumption, but saying that svlvn "didnt know" is something that really throws me off. when someone makes a callout post on someone else, there will OBVIOUSLY be harassment. thats just my thought, i feel like they knew what they were doing since him and his bf arent very good people either. especially holding onto old dms and gathering them up to use it against me, when they could have handled the situation privately with me, rather than hide it behind my back.
all of this could have been prevented if they handled it differently, and that goes for me as well.
im fully aware im in the wrong, but these people are wrong in some places too. and i want people to realize that.
many artists in tcc trace, reference, all the time. i dont understand why im slandered for heavily referencing something, not tracing. theres proof of an artist doing this FROM THE ORIGINAL ARTIST BTW in my dms right now but i dont get them involved
am i handling this situation immaturely? maybe, but arent they doing the same by harassing me? absolutely.
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when it comes to someone being racist/homophobic, people feel the need to harass this person to make them feel worse about what they did. this isnt how you handle a situation. harassing someone to the point they attempt suicide is just as bad as what i did, possibly even worse.
now i have recover slowly until i have the chance to even feel comfortable with myself again. i understand what i said and did was wrong, and im sitting here attempting to change and apologize to the people ive offended and hurt, but throwing that apology under the rug and making it seem like im guilt tripping is ridiculous.
so they cant say i didnt try to apologize, but nobody is guaranteed to accept my apology and thats okay. but putting it out there as if im guilt tripping when im giving reasons why i said it is not even giving me a chance to change
when it comes to growing up with a HUGE racist family, these words and beliefs become apart of my vocabulary and thoughts. its very hard to change that especially when i was always told "its just a word" and i hear it daily! growing up with these slurs has become so normal for me to say it just slips out with no worry, but ofc im seen as guilt tripping when i say this.
its different for each person, i saw a comment saying they grew up in a southern family and they dont say it, but thats them, not me.
people at school and during family events would peer pressure me into saying this slurs multiple times because they found it "funny." i slowly believed that as well.
i was a young teen being taught the wrong things, and seeing other people in tcc say it made me feel like i should say it as well to fit in and be edgy, since thats what the community is like
this situation is another lesson for me to learn, but other people in it need to learn that harassing someone isnt okay, either. especially when im trying to change, it doesnt make it any easier.”
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am-i-the-asshole-official · 8 months ago
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This is pretty low stakes and no matter what, everyone likes each other a lot. So it's not a huge problem. But also, I'm steadfast on this...
I live with my sister a several roomates and we all consider each other family. It's a very cozy living situation. However, that doesnt mean we always get along and X and I butt heads on plenty of occasions.
X is a wonderful person but they're also extremely sensitive. They're autistic and dont like certain sounds or behaviors but also they run around screaming a lot or will walk up up and start talking randomly about something. I dont mind it, it can be really annoying when I'm trying to work but understand it and usually hear them out. However the running around screaming "CUM" and "I'M GONNA KILL YOU" can be pretty grating.
Anyways, I really like singing. I have a high soprano voice akin to a victorian childs ghost and I sing when I do the dishes and X haaaaates it. They always tell me to "fucking stop or I'll kill you" (they just speak in an extreme manner as a joke or out of habit it's not threatening just annoying) or "stop, I cant take it". I sometimes stop but sometimes I tell them to get over it because 1) they scream cum like 24/7 2) our other roomate sings until 3 am (deep husky voice very epic to celtic songs) and nobody complains and 3) idgaf. They tell me I'm mean and I tell them they're being overly sensitive, and then they say that they're autistic.
On one hand I understand that they have sensitivities, our other roomates and my sister are autistic as well and have certain things we need to keep in check. I also recognize that I can be overly harsh at times since they have a hard time understanding boundaries (I have issues with people touching me or invading my business so I have very short temper I that area). On the other hand they are the kind of person who cant take their own medicine, even if they're joking the CUM screaming and constant "I'm gonna kill you" really wears you down. I feel pretty justified in my snapping, like when they kept a walking into my room and caught me changing and said "why dont you put a curtain up?" (I had to reiterate that its MY ROOM!) Also when talking with my other roomates we dont have these kinds of problems and we understand what compromises we need to make.
Anyhow, I was singing These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things and X asked me not to because it gives her bad memories and I said I wouldnt, I sang a Neir song and X asked me not to because it's scary and I said alright, i was singing Lullaby of Birdland and X said something and I said GET OVER IT YOU SISSY and they got really sad. I was going to return to piano playing so I can learn Malo from Turn Of The Screw which is possibly the creepiest victorian child song you could sing, they probably wont like it but nowadays I just say "I literally dont care" and continue.
I know im really harsh and probably being rude but the double standards are very annoying and my other roomates think I'm fine. They say I'm mean but they think everything is mean. We are friends regardless. AITA
What are these acronyms?
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lorre-verie · 2 years ago
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I LOVE LOVE LOVE your avatar modern a-z list and ur neteyam series! I was wondering if you took requests by any chance? like could you do something with aonung with fem reader maybe enemies to lovers? sorry if u dont!
no way, tysm for this! I haven't even put out anything specific saying ill do requests and the fact that you wanted to see more of my writing means so much to me 💚 tysm anon for giving me this chance, i hope it won't disappoint you! There was no specification so I hope me taking creative liberty with this was okay!
: ̗̀➛ “I hate you.” “Love you too.”
word count and approx. reading time: 2.5k words, 8 minutes?
pairings: ao’nung x fem! omaticayan! reader
notes: - reader is neteyam’s twin sister - when someone says something in english it’ll be in italics but not all italic dialogue is english it may just be for emphasising the word - I’m pretty sure the na’vi have their own curse words maybe - I tried to make it seem like you (the reader) is talking to..well..an audience, in the beginning. but i realised thats also you. so to seperate it, the indented text at the start is you talking to yourself.
warnings: kissing, literally making out, teasing, a lot of cussing at the start, neteyam being a protective brother (not a warning ik)
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Meeting someone that is so stupidly annoying, so much that you want to kill them on the inside, is common. Its alright. No biggie. Happens to all of us.
But if the same person makes you feel all giddy inside with their stupid smile and their stupid face and their stupid hands on your shoulder and their stupid mouth, so giddy that you want to shut them up by kissing them, then you’re gonna wanna sit down for this, cause it happened to me, too. 
“Ao’nung, I swear on Eywa if you don’t actually help me with this right now I will pull out your hair and send my ikran after you, you piece of shit!” you practically shriek at him after being stranded by the ilu. 
It had been a month since you and your family first landed in Awa’atlu and started training with the metkayina.
After mastering your breathing, the next step of training consisted of the metkayina helping you and your siblings learn how to ride the creatures, but Ao’nung was being uncooperative as usual.
He didn’t adjust any part of your riding position, insisting that you were going to be fine and that your posture was already “perfect.”, to which you gave him a suspicious glare. And stupidly, you trsusted him. That ended up with you being stranded in the middle of the blue ocean, being practically blown away by the water, ilu leaving you in the dust. 
He laughed, his ilu gliding across the water with him on its back, going in your direction. “That was hilarious. You didn’t actually believe me when I said you were going to be fine, did you?” he chuckled, eyes silently judging your messed up and sopping wet hair. 
You glared at him, exhaling deeply. “You’re such an annoying bitch, you know that?” you mumbled under your breath, saying the word in english so he wouldn’t understand. He had been messing with you for weeks now, always laughing at you if you’d messed something up and never actually being helpful.
As you swam forward, water level at your shoulders, to get onto the back of his ilu, he extended his hand, offering to help you up. Hesitantly, you took it. Once your hand near his, he reached forward and grabbed your forearm, pulling you up and leaning down into your face. 
“You know, for such a pretty face you have such a foul mouth.” he muttered with his deep voice, amused eyes searching your face for a reaction. He really didn’t know exactly what the word meant, but he definitely had a guess.
You were shocked, your hand held high up in the air. He was so strong that his grip on your wrist lifted up the rest of your body, yet it didn’t hurt you at all. Your waist was still submerged in the water,
Your eyes narrowed into slits, he thought he could get the best of you? Even though you were suspended in midair you still came up with a comeback. “Wish I could say the same.” you whispered in mock pity, bottom lip jutting out in a small pout. 
He rolled his eyes with an entertained smirk, lowering you back in the water. “Please, you wish you had my beautiful face.” he said as you mounted the back of his ilu, sitting directly behind him. You were about to respond with another insult when the ilu suddenly dove under the water, and quickly you shut your mouth and took a deep breath in so you wouldn’t pass out. 
It was all so sudden that you didn’t even realise what you just did; wrapped your arms around his abdomen, clutching it for dear life to avoid being thrown off the ilu for a second time. Once you came to your senses, however, you couldn’t bring yourself to pull away. 
Partly because you were just shocked, but also because you could feel his abs. Damn. He certainly was well built for his age, you thought to yourself before snapping out of your momentary daze. You quickly repositioned your hands to hold his shoulders instead, wanting to slap yourself in the face for the thought you just had. 
Sure, you had had a few...maybe romantic thoughts about Ao'nung, especially the first time you two met. He stalked up through the crowd with such confidence and assurance in himself that he caught your attention immediately, but your little love at first sight moment was quickly crushed when he and his friend Rotxo started making fun of your brother's tails, right in front of you.
He was strong, tall, confident, and the Olo'eyktan's eldest son. The whole package. Who wouldn’t like a guy like that? For you, it was much easier to resist, because he was a complete and total asshole to you and your family.
You were pretty sure he had the biggest, stupidest grin on his face right then and there because you knew that he knew that you could feel his muscles. He moved his left arm, placing a hand behind your thigh to secure your position on the ilu as he made a sharp turn around a rock in the water. You were going to have a seizure at this point.
Being Neteyam’s younger twin sister had its perks and definitely its downfalls; your older brother refusing to let you date anyone and side eyeing the hell out of any guy that dared to approach you. 
“Hey, it’s not like you’re going to mate with any of them now! You have the rest of your life for that!” he always said in defense whenever you would get mad at him for scaring a little crush away. 
Granted, he was definitely right. Little kid love wouldn’t have suited you and you probably would have broken up with your boyfriend in a week because you were bored. But then at least you would have gotten used to male attention that wasn’t your family. Well, except for that one time, but that was so long ago you had already forgotten the feeling. 
You felt blood rush to your cheeks at his touch, stomach doing backflips. You took a hand off his shoulder to pinch his on your thigh, a silent warning since you couldn’t speak underwater, causing his hand to jut away and return to holding the rein at the front of the ilu. 
It wasn’t like this was his first time touching you, he’d placed his hand on your shoulder and flickered your forehead, sure. But this time felt different. It was more gentle. More caring. But you hated him. And he hated you. At least that's what you thought.
Your mind wandered to when you were lying in a shallow pool of water with Kiri, chatting away about how Awa'atlu had been for you both so far. "So, how's your little crush?" she smirked, twisting and playing with one of her little braids dangling over her face.
"Crush? I don't have a crush, Kiri." you rolled your eyes. "Are you kidding me??? What about that douchebag Ao'nung?" she stopped playing with her braid, eyes widened. She wasn't mocking you, she actually thought you had a crush on him.
"Ew. Barf. Why would I ever like him? I have taste, sister." you scoffed, pretending that you weren't considering it inside your head. He infuriated you, made you to want to slap the stupid cheshire grin that was constantly on his face.
But when he did keep his mouth shut, you couldn't help but admire his strength. And his better than average face. "I'm too good for him." you said, snapping out of your little daze thinking about him. Kiri raised her eyebrows in amusement, but you didn't notice.
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At the end of the day, your family and Tonowari’s gathered for dinner, having a friendly chat about how things have been going lately. Your mother was doing well in Tsahìk training with Ronal, and your father had mastered riding a skimwing. Your ilu training was taken over by Tsireya who was MUCH more helpful than Ao’nung was, and everyone had made good progress. 
But the real elephant in the room? Lo’ak and Tsireya sitting in front of each other, always making shy eye contact as they ate, her giggling sometimes when she saw his ears turn purple. 
You felt sick to your stomach seeing the interaction. Ronal and your dad didn’t seem to notice, but Tonowari and your mom definitely did. Neytiri hid her smirk by continuing to eat, and Tonowari had a big smile on his face finding that his daughter had found someone (Toruk Makto’s second eldest son, no less!)
Ao’nung wasn’t there to witness this, cause apparently his dad sent him off to do some errands and he was running late. You shared a strained look with your sister Kiri, who made a fake throwing up expression. Neteyam and Tuk honestly couldn’t care less.
When Ao’nung finally arrived, he took the empty seat on Neteyam’s right; in front of you, even though there were 2 other vacant mats he could have sat on. Kiri broke the half amused half disgusted and half oblivious silence, with a “Lo’ak, please stop staring at Tsireya like that I’m literally about to projectile vomit all over the floor.” 
“Kiri, shut up!” he groaned, avoiding Tsireya’s gaze in embarrassment. “Yeah, it’s getting weird and I’m losing my appetite.” you commented, stating the truth but teasing your brother at the same time. By this point, both pairs of parents + Tuk decided to ignore you guys' conversation and talked about their own things. 
“You’re just jealous you never had anyone that liked you!” Lo’ak accused you, you gasping in fake hurt. “Well that’s not true.” Kiri said, shoving her mouth with more food. Your eyes widened, your head turned to look to your right, directly at your sister. Neteyam looked up at this. 
“Oh– right– uhm forget I said anything.” she played it off, temporarily forgetting that you both kept that a secret from your brothers. “Hey no nonononono, I wanna hear more about this guy!” Lo’ak said, eyes flickering between you and Kiri. Ao’nung and Neteyam were also listening intently. 
“I don’t think that’s really necessary.” you said nervously, looking at Neteyam whose eyes narrowed. “No. You will tell me.” your older brother spoke, as you gave him a pleading look. “You know you have to tell him sooner or later.” Kiri rolled her eyes as you slapped her arm. 
“Okay! Fine!” you sighed, an exasperated expression on your face. “It was Viawli! He confessed to me with some flowers and then we dated for a while. Behind Neteyam’s back.” you finished, burying your hands in your face. 
“Honestly you should’ve listened to how annoying she was when they dated. Oh Kiri he’s so sweet he got me flowers- Oh Kiri, he's so funny, Kiri he’s so handsom–” you slap her own hand around her mouth to stop her from talking, your entire face purple at this point. Lo’ak howled with laughter as Neteyam continued eating, expressionless, his annoyance and protective urge probably bubbling up and waiting to explode once your both were out of sight from your parents.
Your eyes met with Ao’nungs, he seemed very shocked at this news, but you decided to ignore it for now. You had more important things to deal with; Neteyam’s wrath.
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After receiving a painful earful from your brother, you opted for a little walk along the beach, enjoying how the ocean looked after eclipse. The sand underneath your feet comforted you, and you liked kicking some of it into water just for fun. As you were doing so, you noticed someone who was waist deep into the water. Strange, you thought. Who would be swimming in the cold water at this hour??
You decided to get closer, and then you noticed the bun. It was Ao’nung. You waded in the water, the ripples from your movement alerting him that someone was near. He turned in your direction, making eye contact with you. 
You wanted to say something to mock him, but your resolve dissipated once you saw the look on his face. He looked like he had been deep in thought, something you’d never seen before. All you could do was wave hi. He nodded his head a little, indicating it was okay for you to be there. 
You waddled through the cold water, standing next to him. He continued staring into the horizon, and you pursed your lips in silence. This was kinda awkward, but you also didn’t want to ruin the moment. You two were so close, if you moved your left arm just a little you could hold his hand. 
Wait what? No! You weren’t supposed to be having these sorts of thoughts around him, he was supposed to be annoying! But you couldn’t help yourself, you looked down to see your hand and his, dangling lonely next to each other. You resisted the urge to take his hand, instead marvelling at the size difference. His hand was huge compared to yours. 
When you looked up, you noticed he was already staring right back at you. But instead of a smug smirk, he had a gentle smile on his face. A genuine smile. Your lips parted, confused as to what he was thinking. 
“So,” he finally said. “This ‘Vialli’ guy. Did he treat you nicely?” he asked, stopping looking at you and instead turning his gaze back to the horizon. “It’s Viawli. Not what I was expecting you to ask but alright. I mean he treated me really well when we dated–” you stopped suddenly, noticing how his ears twitched in annoyance when you said “we dated”.
Holy shit. Was he….jealous????? Your heart raced at this realisation, realising maybe you weren’t hallucinating earlier today and maybe he actually was touching you with care. You decided to test your theory, with a small grin on your face.
“He brought me tons of flowers, he was so sweet, he always complimented me and he always took me out on dates.” you pretended to gush about him, even though you’d already forgotten entirely what your little dates were like. 
“He was super good looking, I was so happy that I scored practically the most handsome guy in the clan–” you were interrupted when Ao’nung pulled you by your chin into a heavy kiss. Your eyes widened in shock, before you closed them and melted into the kiss as well.
Your teasing didn’t quite yield the results you expected, but it got you something even better. You wrapped your arms around his neck and his hands snaked around your waist to pull you even deeper into the kiss. 
The entire time your brain was just screaming at you, telling you to pull away. That it was wrong. He was supposed to be annoying. But your heart urged you, begged you to not let go of him.
You both pulled away at the same time for air, and you were stunned at what just happened. You just made out. With Ao’nung. And you enjoyed it. The world was truly going to end. 
He placed his finger under your chin once more, turning up your head so you’d look at him. He searched your eyes, your face, searching for any sign that you reciprocate his feelings. “I,” he hesitated, “I see you, Y/n.” he whispered.
You didn’t say anything for a while, just looking at him, and that made him concerned. He was about to back away when you finally placed your hand on his cheek gently. “Ao’nung. I see you.” 
His smile grew wide, and he leaned in. You thought he was about to kiss you again, but instead he put his mouth near your ear and mumbled, "I can treat you so much better than that skxawng ever could.", the huskiness of his voice making your knees buckle.
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“You know you look ethereal in the night, right?” he said, as you both sat down on the sand with legs outstretched, hands holding. “Oh shut up, will you? It’s going to get weird.” you huff, feeling slightly embarrassed that you went from shouting at him and calling him a bitch to kissing him and holding hands in just one day. 
“It’s not weird. I don’t feel like anything’s weird.” he smirks, a glint of mischievousness in his eyes, “Why? Do I make you feel weird?” 
You pause, before taking your hand away from his and pinching them together. “I’m this close to throwing sand in your face.” you deadpan.
He squints, looking at your fingers. “They’re touching–” he realises what that means and he takes off running, you following closely behind him with a handful of sand. 
Eventually you catch up to him, being faster since you were much more agile than him on land. You tackle him from behind, pushing him down as he yelps. At this point you no longer have any more sand in your hands and you can’t bring yourself to take any, cause you’re too busy laughing and heaving.
You let him go and sit cross legged in front of him, smiling as he pulls himself up, panting for air. “I,” he breathes out, “I hate you so much–” You snicker, amused by how tired he is and place your hands on your cheeks. “Love you too, Ao.”
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tysm for reading this, in case anyone has any requests and would be willing to give me a chance to fulfill them i'd be glad to! i had so much fun making this and i hope you liked it anon! reblogs and feedback are most most appreciated 💚
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darkacademicvibes · 9 months ago
Text
We Think Similar Thoughts
Part three
Lonely!Fem!Reader x Lonely!Remus
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"The fuck did you just ask her?"
You glance nervously at James, and James shakes his head, unsure how to help as Remus steps in front of you. Sirius continues to speak, "I swear to merlin, if you ever think about asking her out again before you pull your head out of your arse and stop using girls for your own personal amusement-" Remus places a hand on Sirius' shoulder and gently pulls him away, clearly angry. "Dont touch her, don't talk to her, or we'll find you, and we will make your life miserable" Remus threatens quietly. Peter wraps an arm around your shoulders and turns away, the other three boys following after you two.
Remus wraps his arm around your waist, tugging you subtly out from under Peters arm as James laughs, pulling Sirius into a headlock as they walk, which Sirius wrestles out of easily.
"Merlin Pads, I don't think I've ever seen you so defensive since I told you I might fancy Reg" James teases, and Sirius rolls his eyes, cringing, "that's my baby brother, Prongs, I'm still not over it" he quips.
"Thank you, Sirius, I know we aren't that close-" you begin, and Sirius waves off your words easily. "Don't be ridiculous, you were there for Remus. You also told me to get my head out of my arse, and managed to make me listen" Sirius jokes. "You're family now" he tells you, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. James, Peter, and Remus share a look, surprised by his sudden acceptance. "Besides, you remind me of Pete's little sister" he hums, and everything clicks into place.
You smile softly, "little sister?" You ask, and Peter pulls a picture out of his notebook, handing it over. It's a picture of him, clearly from this summer, with a young girl. She also has y/h/c hair and y/e/c eyes, but she still looks so unlike you. "She likes the rain as well, and we can never get her to put down her books, and she hates puzzles but never gives up once she's started" Peter informs you, clearly spotting the slight confusion on your face as you all walk.
You begin to understand, "I see, she's very cute, how old is she?" He grins, taking the photo back. "She's five tomorrow, I'm going to see her and my family at Hogsmeade" he tells you.
You talk of his family for a while more before the both of you are dragged into seperate conversations, Peter with James and Sirius, and you with Remus, mostly about your plans for the Christmas holidays coming up. You don't have any.
☕︎︎
You'd left Remus alone for two hours, an hour and forty minutes at most, and he managed to land himself, Lucius Malfoy, and Corey in the infirmary. You walk in, clearly fustrated, and make your way over to Remus.
"For merlins sake, Remus, I ask you to keep yourself out of trouble while I study for our N.E.W.Ts, and you end up in the hospital wing! What part of 'out of trouble' did you have difficulty understanding, exactly?" You scold, and Remus flashes you a guilty smile. "He was talking about you, they both were, I wasn't gonna let anyone talk about my friend like that" he admits softly, his uninjured arm reaching up to scratch under his eye lightly.
You sigh heavily, "This is the second time today we've been to the hospital wing" you state, still slightly annoyed. "Both times because of me, and I won't stand for it, I can take perfectly good care of myself, and I couldn't give less of a care about what mindless fools say about me" you tell Remus, crossing your arms as you sit beside him.
"Next time you end up here because you got into a fight before exams, I will continue studying, I hope you know that" you hum, and Remus laughs, tossing his uninjured arm around your shoulders. "I do, thanks for checking up on me, even if it was only to tell me off" he jokes. "But y'know what prongs says, 'only the great die young', right?" he teases quietly, and you roll your eyes playfully. "Yeah, yeah, did you win at least?" you joke, and he nods proudly. Dork.
You help him up gently and he follows you to the library after you both thank Pomfret, who sends a distracted smile to Remus as you leave, muttering out a hurried "no more fights, Remus" warningly under her breath.
☕︎︎
Mock exams, of course it has to be the day where you're busy with practice exams that Lilly Evans bumps into you, crying her eyes out. Thankfully, you both had the Charms exam next, it was a simple timed essay, with no talking, and no cheating - obviously - but when Flitwicke saw Lilly's tear-stained cheeks, he didnt say anything about the way you reached forward to hold lilys hand as she sat at the desk in front of you.
You could feel James' eyes on you both as he sends worried glances at the girl of his dreams, trying to catch your eye to ask silently about the pretty redhead.
The moment Flitwicke dismisses everyone, James is on his way over as Lilly speaks lowly to you.
"Thank you for being so kind, I know we aren't exactly close" Lilly mumbles, wiping her her face with her long sleeves as you dig through your bag, finally finding the face wipes you have and handing them to her gently. "No, of course, you're Remus' friend" you smile softly.
She takes the wipes greatfully as James stops at her side, his hands gently tipping up her head to make her face him, "what happened Lils? Is everything okay?" He murmurs softly, his hazel eyes searching over her for any sign of injury. Lilly hiccups, "my cat died" she sniffles, and sympathy strikes at you as your hands immediately wrap around her, hugging her lightly, your hand rubbing soothing circles on her back.
"I'm sorry, Lilly, I know how awful that is" you hum, and James relaxes, gently brushing Lilly's red hair back from her face as he gently takes the wipe from her hand, cleaning her tears without smudging her eye makeup. Regulus stops by, frowning softly as he takes in Lilly, "are you alright, Evans?" He asks quietly, and Lilly nods, repeating her heartache. Regulus' eyes fill with a soft sympathy and he nods slowly.
"Oh.. I'm sorry to hear that" he murmurs, smiling sadly at James and hesitating before nodding at you and continuing onwards. You watch him for a moment, the threes dynamic slowly fitting into place in your mind. Curiosity and slight amusement fill you as you wonder about how the next stages in their relationships will work out, if they'll end up together or not.
"Are you coming, y/n?" James hums, and it yanks you back to reality. You nod, hurrying after the two, wrapping your arm around Lillys shoulders as you walk, James' hand gently rubbing up and down her back as she sniffles softly, explaining her cat and how wonderful he was.
☕︎︎
You practically sprint to the room of requirement after dinner. Things have been rushing so quickly and the days seemed so much shorter, and you felt so thrown off.
I need a place where everything is slower.
The door appears and you make your way in, immediately heading right towards the very back of the huge room, a library, tearoom, music room, and living room all combined into one. The grand piano is tucked away between two of the large bookshelves, and a few small tables littered with kettles, and sugar, and cream, and cups with saucers are hidden few and far between the shelves as well. You reach the back of the room and fall onto one of the couches, a few chairs and couches all huddle around the large fireplace, the soft, antique, red persian rug laid across the floor, warmed by the fires heat.
You sit up and look towards the small rack in the corner of the room, mostly hidden away, with changes of clothes. You make your way towards it and look through the items, deciding to change from your uniform into comfortable leggings and a large sweater, kicking off your shoes before browsing the shelve of candles. One peculiar one catches your attention.
𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒎 𝑵𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒔
𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒄𝒐𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆, 𝒄𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒃����𝒓𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒔𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒐𝒐𝒅
You hum and gently take it from the shelf, lighting it before you slip a book from the shelf and settle into one of the armchairs, curling up by the fire as you allow the tension in your shoulders to slowly lessen, until you've practically melted into the chair.
You're halfway through the book and the candle when you hear the door open, a soft voice calling for you from the entrance. "Y/n? Are you in here?" James sounds exhausted, and a shuffle of footsteps make you lift your head, "back here, James" you call quietly, not wanting to disturb the peace as the sunset shines through the windows, the golden light highlighting the small dust specks in the air as the fire sends a darker light around the couches, warmth blooming through your bones as you stretch for the first time in hours.
Remus and James round the bookshelf and pause, "it's so weird seeing the sunset at one in the morning" James mumbles sleepily, wearing his pajamas. Remus gazes softly around the room. "It's nice" Remus murmurs, moving over to lean on the back of your armchair, gently slipping his fingers through your hair soothingly. "You're so tense" he hums and James watches Remus, clearly judging, "liar" James huffs, collapsing onto the couch and tugging a blanket over him.
"Classes are canceled, started storming, a few classrooms in the dungeons are flooded and there isn't enough room for the potions students anywhere else, not for them to study safely, said there was a ghoul in the abandoned corridor" James mutters, closing his eyes as he tosses his glasses onto the coffee table.
Remus gently combs his fingers through your hair, his thumbs gently slipping down the back of your neck. "You alright dove? You been hiding away since dinner, I was worried" he hums, and you nod, quietly admitting how things have seemed lately. Rushed, busy, and torn to bits, sometimes you felt unsure of what day it was.
By the time the sun sets in the room, Sirius and Peter have joined you, brining along Lilly who easily slips into a comfortable chair with her book, and a cup of tea.
The room is now lit by oil lamps like the ones in your grandparents home, and the letter Sirius said came for you when he dropped onto the floor by the fireplace is now beside james' glasses as he sleeps peacefully, occasionally sniffling in his sleep.
You finish your book, eyes filled with tears, and you meet Remus' eyes hesitantly. He moves smoothly, settling in beside you and allowing you to babble on about the book as you cry quietly, Lilly, the person who recommended it to you, sends you an apologetic smile as you flip her off half-heartedly.
You easily relax against Remus' chest, and something feels hauntingly familiar.
He smells like chocolate, and cranberries, and sandalwood. He smells exactly like the candle that had made you relax the most as you did what all candle lovers do; sniff them until you find one that provides you with the perfect type of calm you want.
You were sure, if the room of requirement could talk, it would be cackling at the way your stomach dropped at the realization. You're starting to feel things a friend shouldn't feel for a friend, and the thought of losing Remus makes you curl closer to him, which doesn't help your racing heart.
There's no winning, you suppose. But at least you can see the stars, and at least you aren't quite so lonely anymore.
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anon-imuz · 2 months ago
Note
Yandere Jodio X childhood friend reader who moved away before Jodio set that bus on fire because her dad got a job in Ohio and she comes back to visit her relatives in Hawaii when she's in High school and she decides to surprise visit Jodio and Dragona and their mom. Jodio isn't willing to let her go a second time.
your probably have no idea of how MAD i am i literally finished writing this and my phone crashed so I have to do it again... idk if it was longer or shorter before since it got magically deleted
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not a gif but idc
Pairing: Yandere!Jodio Joestar x Fem!Childhood friend! Reader
Warnings:Yandere behavior and imprisonment
Type:angst with a bit of psychological horror
Notes: i dont condone dddne irl and English isn't my first language so there might be spelling mistakes. I'm also not good at psychological horror but I tried anyway
Your dad after a long day of work, knocked on your door.
"Hey can you open? I've got something to tell you."
You got up, placed your phone on the nightstand, walked up to your door and opened it.
"We're going to Hawaii for a few days to visit your relatives. I hope you're happy, and if you are, start packing your bags!" Your dad said, but closed the door before you could even say anything.
You picked up your suitcase and started packing it, putting all the necessary things inside.
When you woke up, your family settled to go back to your childhood place, you were excited to meet your relatives, but also someone else.
When you arrived, all your relatives met you with sweet phrases and hugs, only to then let you go set off all your stuff and come to the table to eat something.
After that, it was almost late evening so you decided to go surprise your friend with a visit. You explained everything to your parents only to leave off with a:
"Yeah yeah don't worry, I'll call you if something happens!"
You then went to the florist to buy some nice flowers for his mom, and went to his house.
You knock on the door,
"Who's there?" His mom asks.
"Guess who!" You respond in a playful tone.
She then greets you with a hug and various compliments, also thanking your for the flowers.
Once you've entered his house, you tiptoed to his room, then knocking.
"Come in..." He said in an annoyed tone, only to then widen his eyes when he saw you.
"Hii!" You greet him with a cute smile, sitting on the edge of his bed.
Finally. Finally you came back. Finally you could be with him forever.
"Oh hi, didn't expect you here." He played it off cool with a neutral face.
"Only a hi? it's been a while since we last met you know? asking anything is okay." You say, strange out by his behavior.
"Did you miss me?" He hesitantly asked.
"Well yeah, but growing up I've also made some other friends, you know..."
What?
Friends?
Wasn't he supposed to be your only friend? Wasn't he supposed to be the only friend you'd rely on? The one you loved the most?
He didn't know how to answer, but then sighed and said:
"If that's what you're looking for..."
You didn't understand his phrase because as soon as he finished it you were knocked out.
When you woke up, you felt tightly held by some ropes,on your wrists and ankles. When you got conscious, you realized you were trapped and couldn't do anything about it.
You screamed for help but the only thing that replied to you were your own echoes.
"You're disgusting. After all the time I spent waiting for you, after all the hope that I lost thinking of you, of our memories, thinking you still cared about me, the only thing you're able to tell me is that you've made new friends? With some random annoying stupid scumbags? I should be your only friend. There should be no other one but me. I'm so disappointed by you..." He said, almost scolding you.
What? Was he serious? He really was the one who did this? This felt surreal. There was no way this wasn't some nightmare caused by the stress from school.
"W-what? A-are you crazy? LET ME GO! NOW!" You screamed in fear, but only received a giggle as response.
"Me? Crazy? I'm the crazy one? Do you even know what you're saying?" He asked.
"LET ME FUCKING GO YOU PSYCHO! NOW!!!" You screamed, as loud as you could, but nobody answered.
"Your words are very rude, Oh by the way, I really wanted to say that your parents are so loving. You have no idea how many times they've called your phone. Then they called my mom, she asked me where you were. I said i didn't know because after a while you just left and I had no idea where you were or went. But guess what? I was lying, of course. Now we're going to be best friends forever and nothing will do us apart. Hey, perhaps you'll even develop some feelings for me. " He said, cupping your cheek with his hand, with a light grin on his face.
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mikewheeleranti · 1 year ago
Text
you're losing me
sebastian sallow x reader
sypnosis: you're left to do nothing but watch as the boy you love goes on with the new fifth year looking for his sisters cure. angst, implied slytherin reader.
wc: 1k
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a/n: you're losing me by beloved ts BROKE me and then i realized its so sebastian coded.
you know there's no possible cure for anne, you realized that months ago when becoming aware of her quickly spreading disease. there was, at least, no cure that could be attained in an achievable way. you've prayed to anything that a cure would come in time for your old friend, but now you fear it won't. it was a fact that this was hard on sebastian. he grieved, he mourned, and almost every night he would cry into your shoulder while you had nothing to comfort him with anymore. until he didn't.
recently, sebastian had become cold and then extremely excitable. he was always in some kind of rush, almost like he was on an adrenaline high. he distanced himself from you, which was understandable. he was grieving. he was aching, and didn't have time for a relationship. so why was he always so close with the new fifth year?
you finally had a chance to talk to him, sharing hushed whispers nearby the undercroft. you were telling him you wanted a time to talk to him about something that's been paining you, trying to see why he looked like he wanted to be anywhere but there with you, like he was waiting for something. or someone. the undercroft was you, sebastian, and ominis' precious secret since first year, which is why you gaped when sebastian's new friend came up to you both and started talking about it.
"sebastian! come quick, i found something in the undercroft!" completely disregarding your presence, they push past you to drag sebastian away.
"you told them about the under-"
"sorry, no time to talk! i'll see you later, probably." and he was gone. running down the hallway with them, the air quickly filling with loss as your heart drops. your pain was an imposition to him, he has more important things to deal with. you think of what you used to roll your eyes at when an older relative would tell you. 'you don't know what you've got until it's gone.'
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you and your new friends, sebastian, anne, and ominis, were laughing down a hallway. it took a while to get ominis to talk, but you could tell these would be your friends for the rest of time. once you all got to the common room, you decided to sit on the side of the room with a window outlooking the black lake.
"do you guys think mermaids actually swim past these windows?" you hear anne ask the question after hearing 6th years talk about them.
"i wonder if mermaids are scary like i've heard in stories."
"sebastian, how would a mermaid be scary?"
"hey! you never know what they could look like, i heard fairies are actually terrifyi-"
"ahem." you and ominis had been hearing the siblings argue for 10 minutes now about mythical creatures, not that it truly annoyed you. you were glad to be hearing more of sebastian, noticing whenever he did speak, your heart fluttered. you're sure anne is well aware of this by now, not missing the way you stumbled through your words around him. she teased you about this crush constantly, and you were not safe from it that night in your dorm.
"so... my brother?"
"oh, shove off anne!"
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you would forever miss the playful conversations you had with anne when you both were young. you knew anne wouldn't be able to be cured, and if one came it would be too late. what you didn't realize was that you have nobody anymore. sebastian was always gone and ominis had this on top of everything else going on with his family. you never felt the need to make other friends, because they would be yours forever. forever felt so much shorter than it did when you were 11.
you finally see sebastian days later in the common room, and you dont miss the fact he's talking to his fifth year friend with a smirk.
"sebastian! i haven't seen you in weeks, where have you been?"
"oh, sorry. we've been busy." the fifth year answers the question that was meant for him, and you once again feel it. your heart can't flutter when you look at him anymore. if you get butterflies around him, it's out of nerves.
"oh. well, can i please talk to you seb, alone?" when he finally obliges and walks over to what used to be your spot, he looks bored. he never looks bored around them, always having that glimmer in his eye that was once reserved for you.
"what did you need to talk about?" he sounds exhausted, though he was just in a great mood around them. you really shouldn't resent them in the way that you do, but all you've ever done for the sallow family is be there. putting your own feelings aside immediately for anne and sebastian. solomon thought of you as his own child, always calling you his bravest soldier. you didn't feel so brave anymore standing here in front of him.
"where have you been running off to lately? i never see you anymore and it worries me."
"i'm fine, i've just been busy with... studying." you saw him look into his lap and start fidgeting, a tell-tale sign he was lying.
"see, sebastian! what is this? you're lying to me about something and telling some random person you just met everything. it's like you're replacing me for them."
"don't call them that." he was stern with his tone, looking straight at you. never with that boyish look he had in his eyes months ago anymore, but with a cold, reserved one.
"excuse me?" you're a bit shocked that when you confided to him about how you were feeling you were met with him defending the fifth year. you really knew nothing about him anymore, and didn't particularly know if you wanted to. you were about to say something else when you saw him walking away.
"seb, wait." he kept walking.
"please." only then did he turn around to look at you, waiting for you to finish.
"please, talk to me. all i've done is be there for you, i just want you to see me. it's all i've ever wanted, please. do something, risk something, for once. seb, you're losing me."
"i'm sorry, they're waiting for me." and for the last time your heart dropped to your stomach for him. for the last time you realized he had lost you, and you had lost him. your heart wouldn't start for him anymore, he didn't choose you.
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shallah-insfelimna · 5 months ago
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a cry for help from the near-forgotten and invisible people of gaza - DAY ???
hello again, i have returned briefly thanks to a new friend's allowing me to utilize their wifi hotspot- (thank you deranged_abberation2443 on reddit!!) and i wanted to also say thank you to everyone who has helped even by simply reblogging my prior posts as even if you are unable to donate, any amount of visibility is not only helpful but neccesary.
i come to you now happy to still be alive- head hurting from the explosions - despite the hell we have all endured so far- this morning we said our prayers and it was as if for a brief moment- nature itself stood with us- i reminded myself to admire the present moment for my sanity would wane without these small moments of gratitude.
we have endured.
it is far from over.
since last posting, i have known 5 people whom were incredibly close to me to either be killed in the rubble or succumb to their untreated wounds. it is hell on earth. in heaven, there is another gaza, one filled with our fallen friends and family, all smiling and happy and free- waiting with open arms for the rest of us to finally come home.
for us still tasked with our time here in gaza on earth- we absolutely still need your help. if there is anything you can do- do it. friends in the western world- protest, bring light to this hidden horror, call it what it is- a genocide. disturb the comfort and peace so easily used to forget the truth of your neighbors crying for help, disturb public events with cries of gaza' s need, it is not rude but necessary- tell anyone who will listen and shout it at those who will not- we need you our brothers and sisters of the human race. please help us be free from this rampant and horrific inhumane injustice to our people. we are victims of someone elses perception of wrongdoing. we have nothing to do with the people killing us, we are just being made an example for some unrelated and greedy or monsterous need.
if you can reblog this please do, visibility is essential. donations help immensely in any amount. i have had my dear american friend who is the very reason you are able to read this post now- to make me a new paypal account and if i am not mistaken a crowdfunding account of some sort as well- i give her my utmost thanks- without her i would be as most of the rest of my people are- invisible.
ok it turns out that paypal is being annoying as hell so im gonna have to ask for crypto currently as i have no other way of receiving the money.
DONATE HERE:
ETH: 0xD8819EE9179e839859C1410b544110dB9B5E8991
BTC: 3QDuXseMQTXRvh2dVmdjcbfFUj3DoL4nJu
SOL: Fi5d3X4Xzcxzw5gAstLmbaxf655xWzEsYm6Z5rgBiUjN
USDT: erd10zh2scz8aaz000kmz8huj7fewkx4jht5an2npp2gwc7ex9800m2ssrz0na
i will also include the cashapp of my american friend though it is also probably going to be a bad move because like paypal its gonna shut down or lock which risks losing all donations. the best way to do it as of right now is more than likely through crypto. yay, the future? i still dont fully understand it but i know it works.
cashapp: $jaybeelerclt
once again thank you so much for your time, please donate if you can, it will help us survive. maybe even escape. i will stay until the very last drop of blood is shed though. my mother and brother were martyrs.
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the-s1lly-corner · 11 months ago
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Uhh i request you
<-forgot everything about creepypasta after stopping reading fanfics
Uhhhhhhh
Um
...slenderman uhhhhm meeting reader who is the same.. species? Found family????? Reader being chipper and welcoming?? Artistic and calming?? Basically um. I dunno. They also live in the woods and collect poor souls, helping them cope and detach from this world??????
I am.. stoopid.
Slenderman x slender-person!artistic!reader ! (found family)
dusts out my slenderman hcs as well as my au ideas on him aheehee ahoo speed running this since i just put my first round of macarons into the oven and im too impatient to wait until theyre done baking for me to write this NEVER BACK DOWN NEVER WHAT
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okay but im getting this idea out of the way before i forget. imagine the reader, instead of doing paintings and stuff for the "artist" thing they make little structures and statues and stuff and have them around in your area. of course theyre all made with forest material; mud, sticks, pinecones, ect ect i dont know, i just love the nature aesthetic with this idea and rrrraaaaaAAAAH
for some reason or another, you make your home in the same woods THE slenderman lives in; or perhaps it was the otherway around? regardless, it doesnt take long for you to become aware of one another....
okay but how funny would it be if you guys bonded over your annoyances over people collecting your stuff. people taking his pages, and people taking your art projects (at least the ones that are portable). like!
though i cannot think of any lore reasons for slendermans pages in my au.... i will one day i promise, i feel like thats too much of an iconic thing to just cut out
it DOES take a long while for slenderman to get used to you, much less foster a friendship with you... but a family bond? i mean yeah sure, hes very reclusive... but thats not just with humans. he doesnt like interacting with other creatures, either
pats your shoulder
my moot
my dear moot, allow me to go on a tangent about my take on slenderman
basic summary is that he and all other demon/most nonhuman creepypasta characters were made by zalgo in my funky au; basically to bring disorder and that kind of shit. but like in a "this is just a part of this universe's nature" way. thus making slenderman himself in my take the be a simple fact of life... thinks.. and he resents his own existence, i think. i mean how cruel is it that he was made to cause issues, in fact he cant live without it (eats people) but he was granted the ability to be able to grasp the complexity of morals and emotion. like thats fucked
i love it
anyways, theres that and him just naturally being reclusive! hell even his supposed "brothers" (splendor and trender, i refuse to touch the third one) hes still.. distant
basically what i mean to say is that you guys probably arent going to be.. outwardly close... if that makes sense. like hes not going to be very affectionate; so dont expect many familial... things... and its not often that he would seek conversation out... though
as i write that, if i recall correctly i did give him the vague craving of connection, and while i usually save that for traditional x reader stuff, i think this would still apply to found family stuff! so actually, i think he WOULD eventually start seeking your company out, just for the fact of having someone else to talk to who doesnt resent his existence the same way he resents his own
sits
given my silly hc i do think he would have some understanding with your relationship with humans/lost souls. would he do it himself? i think it really depends on the situation... like if hes not actively hunting he usually just drives people out of the woods, no sense in wasting.... things... you know?
sits
im all jumbled all over the place my apolocheese im just excited to write for slenderman again
will get annoyed if you snatch away his "meal" since AGAIN, he was cursed to feed on people . like he understands why you did it, and he has mixed feelings around eating human (like not in a "im distressed and i hate it" way more so "its not totally desirable but i cant survive without doing this" way)
sits
i think
im gonna toy around with my slenderman hcs... this ended up being more of a hc dump than a x reader, my apologies
its also that as im typing this i realize how similar my takes on eyeless jack and slenderman are... which is funny because they live in the same woods in my au but they fucking HATE each other
territorial stuff you know
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camp-vamps-radio-b1tch · 10 months ago
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Gonna make headcannons for my favorite characters because WHY NOT! >o<
Alejandro
He was born in Spain and lived there for about 5 years before moving to Canada
He has a 3 year age gap with José (he’s 19) and a 9 year age gap with Carlos (he’s 25)
Alejandro gets mad easily if he’s annoyed because of José. When he was younger If kids at school annoyed him he would express their anger, but soon he realized that kids didn’t like that about him, so when he moved he just got silently upset and would just ignore them if he got angry at them.
When Alejandro was 10, Carlos turned 19 and moved out to go pursue his soccer career
Since Spain Schools are so much different from Canadian schools (I mean in Spain the get to go home to eat lunch) Alejandro didn’t like the schools in Canada (he’s used to the schedule now)
Alejandro likes to put eyeliner on (sometimes mascara) and he has like this whole skin routine too
Alejandro straightens his hair almost every day, but when it gets wet it curls up. (His hair is more wavy then curly though)
Obviously he likes Carlos more than José. And since José never really liked him, Alejandro wanted to make sure that Carlos liked him. So whenever he did something that would upset Carlos, Alejandro got really upset at himself
Alejandro speaks Spanish to his parents most of the time, but talks to his brothers in English.
José beats Alejandro in pretty much everything, so he hates when he loses to other people. When he was younger he would get upset and almost cry, but now he just gets mad.
Alejandro listens to a good amount of Spanish music. Idk who he listens to exactly (despite me being Latina lol) but I feel like he’s listen to Selena
Alejandro doesn’t have many genuine friends. He’s using them all in some way. But he gets closer to Tyler and Lindsay. They annoy him sometimes but he starts to actually enjoy their company
Duncan
Duncan said he has brothers at one point in the show (so I gave him two) Duncan is the middle child. He has a decently big age gaps between his brothers too (idk how many years exactly but yeah)
His older brother (Dexter) was what inspired Duncan’s punk fashion and demeanor.
Dexter was a troublemaker as well, which influenced Duncan. When Dexter realized that he toned down what he did more, because he didn’t want Duncan to go too far down this rabbit hole of like crime and stuff (it didn’t work. Duncan is like worse actually)
Duncan is a major dog person. He loved his dog and cried when he ran away (he like never cried as a kid)
He got Scruffy when he was 13
Pretty much his whole family is disappointed in him (and Dexter) because of how much they act up.
The whole family went crazy when Duncan got sent to Juvie
Duncan knows that most of his family doesn’t like him, and that his dad doesn’t like him that much either.
His dad actually favors his younger brother (haven’t decided on a name yet) because he a good kid and doesn’t cause trouble and Duncan sees that. He doesn’t hold a grudge against his brother though because he understands why.
He loves giving nicknames to people (especially people he likes)
Probably a Mama’s boy
He collects lighters, and when they run out of fluid he puts them in a drawer. He has like a shit ton.
I’m a Duncan smokes kinda gal
Duncan steals clothes like a lot because he doesn’t have any money lmao
Physically he’s pretty weak. I mean he can throw a punch but can’t take one
He wears those over the ear headphones and covers them in stickers
DJ and Geoff are his best friends, but Duncan never pressures DJ into anything too crazy because he knows that DJ isn’t like him when it comes to crazy stuff (whether that be like smoking or vandalism)
He actually really likes hanging out and talking to Gwen. And why he does find her attractive, sometimes he kinda regrets dating her (SORRY I DONT SHIP GWUNCAN)
He doesn’t mind being friends with Zoey because he can drop his tough guy act a bit and she won’t judge (actually he can do that with DJ and Geoff too)
Since I’m a Malcan shipper lol I like to think that Mal and Duncan didn’t talk that much (bc Duncan didn’t recognize him at first in All Stars) but they interacted a few times. They both found the other attractive and kissed like once.
Sometimes he hangs out with Heather. It’s like a like-hate friendship where they genuinely hate each other sometimes but when the time is right they hang out together and have fun
Mal
(I did some research on DID so I hope the fronting stuff his accurate)
He was created by Mike when he was very young, protecting Mike from physical harm and abuse
Since he would front and get exposed to violent acts, he quickly learned how to fight back, which is why he’s so violent
He holds a lot of Mike’s trauma
He does not trust anyone, and he doesn’t care about anyone
Sometimes when Mike stressed about stuff that involved his parents, Mal would front. Usually during that time, Mal would find things to do that were kinda violent
As Mike got older, Mal started getting more violent. Mike didn’t like that
Mal found hurting his abusers very satisfying, so eventually violence in general became fun for him
Not so much Mal, but Mike’s closet is full of all kinds of different clothes for all his alters. Mal’s clothes are more dark and grungey
The reason Mike got sent to jail was for assault. Who he assaulted idk but neither Mike or Mal liked them.
Mal fronted pretty much the entire time in juvie because Mal thought that Mike couldn’t handle some of the people in there, and because Mal had gotten them there in the first place.
Once Mike realized what Mal did in juvie, and everything he did before he pushed Mal into his subconscious as he did not want Mal to front anymore. That made Mal extremely upset but he found himself not being able to front anymore
The reason he’s just straight up evil in All-Stars is because he was concealed for so long and felt that it was unfair and had bottled up anger
All the alters knew that Mike needed to leave his house, so Mal also tried to win the Million for all of them, because no matter what happened, he was created by Mike to protect him. Of course Mal was his own person but that in a way was a part of his purpose
Okay! Yippie! This took like 3 hours to write everything so if you read all this ily <33
I love these little goobers so much GRAAA
I might add things every once in a while based off other peoples headcannons so yeah just thought id say that lol
Maybe if I come up with enough I’ll like reblog this and list some more :3
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abysshare · 15 days ago
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Normally i don't do this because like. While I'm well aware i can have my own opinions, i still don't want to make anyone feel bad for me being a disliker ( maybe hater? ).
Spoilers / talking about the new Venom movie below. If you liked it I'm glad you did! If you want to explain in why in comments, feel free! /genuine
I'll start with: i had a bad-ish day so maybe everything soured my mood and i wasn't ready i. The end. I also picked the wrong ticket and had to watch it in 3D < not a 3D fan due to being sensitive to flashing lights.
What i did like:
Implications of being bonded since v1
Knull ( surprisingly, i hate the comic story though I'm gonna be so real. But its been awhile since i looked up the plot/story ).
Agony and the Christmas themed Symbiote
Horse.
Dancing.
The blue symboite and that fire symbiote ( so pretty?? I loved the different powers and such. I want to draw both of them ).
The symbiote hunter, shes gorgeous.
What i Did NOT like:
Toxin being erased entirely.
They killed of Carnage and Cletus in 2 so this whole thing flopped without them IMO
You can see where Disney or Sony whoever wanted this or that but when Tom or whoever didn't want it, it got scrapped and had messy left overs.
Too much action and too much comedy ( the dancing was fine, but the hippie family deal went on a bit too long imo ).
Why was Agony introduced but not the other three? Specifically Scream at least?
Knull having his own thanos moment for sony, a spin off or whatever they're doing.
Eddie's ENTIRE attitude.
That Montage was ASS. Hate that song too.
Too much going on imo
I would have loved to have a genuine queer moment, a kiss, a "i love you", literally anything. I can MAYBE understand if they tried but Sony or Disney said no ( fuck them ) but still. And no i was one of the few that hope there wasn't fucking or kiss with HARD tongue ( i am ace and also these two are my dads to me, it would've been awkward ). Yeah i see some people saying "Its textual" !!!
Yea sure thats nice but aren't you tired? It doesn't have to be queer baiting but like. I'm so tired.
Even if you remove that um? Its not.. that great.
I'm WILLING to watch it again and read positive sides. Because my mood just may have soured.
i think my biggest issue if i take everything away what i just said, is Eddie just going back to being annoyed at every little thing Venom does or wants. ITS OKAY to be concerned about being found by the hunter, but even before then hes just so done. And even during? He should've been concerned. Or Yeah he CAN be annoyed / irritated, but it should be with care. This felt like he was back to thinking of Venom as a tumor, something he just needs to get rid of.
It was vastly upsetting as someone who has partners. Like.. it would be okay if this was the second or first- but it isn't!!!!! And yeah couples fight, but they didn't even do that. Couples have disagreements! But they didn't even talk it out or anything.
Also like? One of my things that bugged me was, when Eddie was complaining about his feet, and we knew Venom couldn't fully take over..... why didn't Venom just yk. Cover his feet for him and walk? That would have been a subtle sweet gesture while they could've still been bantering and so on.
If they had like. Argued, fought, had an emotional moment at the end, Eddie was upset he never got to apologize- i could see it. But thats another thing- he wasn't even THAT upset...
Its fine to not be a super empathetic person, fuck i dont always cry appropriately either. But he didn't show Nothing and not in a "i'm a no empathy person" way.
Idk!!!!!!!! My brain is scrambled.
People have said a lot of what i have problems with already but idk i just!!! Feel the need to put it out there.
Also i missed the second end credit scene :,)
Note: I'm not angry or completely a hater. More so neutral and not a huge fan of some things.
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catboylister · 29 days ago
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Hi! You asked for iwbft angst and I'm just back from the club so I am here to make myself sad :)
All I can think of I'd jimmy and his sister and the headcanons I have about that. So here you go
It's not that jimmy was the favourite of his grandparents but he needed a lot more tlc than his sister did. With coming out as trans at a really young age and that needing advocated fir, and his anxiety/paranoia, and him being like a music prodigy (and also him height just Youngest Child tm). His sister had classic oldest daughter syndrome and just had to go along with all this when it seemed like nothing in her life was as interesting. (Also she probably remembers a time where their parents were together more than himmy but I don't have thoughts about that)
When she was going to university she choose the farthest place she could. She loves her family, but she needed to distance herself from them (and jimmy specifically). When in school all she was known as was "Jimmy's sister" weather that was a good thing or not, and she wanted the chance to be her own person
Jimmy on the other hand is desperate for her attention/approval! Je doesn't make it public thay he has a sister ciz she doesn't want that but he will bring her up to people who know all the time.
"Oh my sister loves lasagne" "my sisters favourite colour is purple" "Oh my sister is studying that in America" etc etc
When the ark start doing shows in America jimmy very hopefully messages her to ask her to come. She...isn't fussed, but says something like "Yeah, maybe, if I'm free", and to Jimmy that is a undeniable yes! And he's ecstatic!
Rowan and Lister (as Jimmy defenders through abd through!) Have complicated feelings about her.
I feel like her and rowan are very similar, but because they grew up together worh jimmy hes like a second brither, but rowan is also very stubborn and especially when ut comes to Jimmy so she is the worst in his books (compensating because Jimmy can't see it). Lister Ron the other hand, I feel like she clocked listers crush from the get go and very much h does not approve of the relationship. Not that Lister cares, he can see right through her just as easily, lister knows what it's like to have difficult siblings relationships, so they have their own understanding.
Lister is the one to actually convince her to come see them perform. Nit that jummy needs tk know that.
She crys during Joan of Ark.
Okay that's all I hot goodnight 🥰
AAAAA i loove all of this !! we actually have such similar ideas about her ?? me and my friend talk have like turned her into an oc together lolsies weve been calling her naomi hehe
and i sooo agree with the older sister syndrome. i feel like she would've had a big inferiority complex when it comes to jimmy, since he becomes successful at such a young age, and while shes doing well in school, its just sort of average compared to him. also with her being older im sure she has more memories of their parents, so the move between living with them and their grandparents may have been harder for her. and jimmy not really understanding why she seeks their approval so much when their not even around for them.
but even though their relationship is complicated she does care about him. like she looks out for him in school from the sidelines and i think she really does not get a long with lister after the suitcase incident. rowan was kinda scared of her growing up because she just seemed annoyed by everything 24/7 bless. also i can imagine a younger jimmy being like can we play mario kart :( can we play just dance :( can we play minecraft :( like hes just always been the annoying younger sibling even though if she were to bring it up hed be like well i dont remember it like that so ur being dramatic :/ (shes just saying it how it was)
also i when shes older i think she travels a lot for work !! in my head shes a sports journalist and i totally did not make this a thing so i could make her and kou matsuoka (that one girl from free) lesbians together. i think she comes out to him or the gujarat family holiday and hes like 'no way ur dating an olympic swimmer ????' and shes like. 'even better. an olympic swimmer's SISTER !!' also in my head she looks like camilia from 'i love amy' but with curlier hair
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pseudowho · 10 days ago
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Hi Haitch 🥺 I’ve never sent an ask in but I really need some guidance with how to deal with the adults in my family
To cut it down into simple terms I’m in my early years of studying psychology and I’ve just about had it with the taunts I get in response to that. I have to preface that my mom has never taken part in this, she encouraged me to study this in the first place, but she also doesn’t speak out against it ever
From the day I applied, my family (specifically my dad and brother) has been really .. i dont even know, just off about it.
I remember them being like “are you /sure/ you want to do it? why not do something else? why dont you want do to [blank] instead? think about your personality… do you think you can handle dealing with people like that?”.
Throughout my first year they kept on checking in on me like “do you /still/ want to do psychology? have you considered switching? its /really/ hard”
It’s like this curse I’ve placed on myself? Every time I get angry or upset or emotional, or just about do anything that isn’t what aligns with what they want the response is “you’re a psychologist, you should change the way you think” “people are going to sit in your office and say something and you’ll end up crying instead.” “if you’re so sensitive how will you become a psychologist?”. Another instance is that I’ve always been a picky eater and it was never an issue, but ever since I started uni it’s been a constant “you’re a psychologist. why don’t you like this? please, fix yourself” as if I didn’t hate those foods since I was like 7 or 8. I can’t understand if I’m truly overreacting or not.
Whatever I started out of self interest and (however limited) passion is now twisting into hate and anger. In the beginning I used that energy to continue with spite and prove them wrong but I genuinely dont have the bandwidth to deal with it for another 4 or 5 years, especially considering we’re not a culture that moves out of the house.
Sorry for the overload Haitch, but I don’t really have anyone else to talk to about this. I hope you’re having a good day!
Counterpoint:
If you're not sensitive, how will you be a psychologist? I should think that with emotional sensitivity and empathy, you'll be able to uniquely connect with and understand people in a way that could only be enhanced through an education in Psychology.
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Let's break down the systematic way your male family members oppress the female ones in your family.
Your mother was all for it at first; now she's not. Why? Because your father has bullied her into submission, and to toe the line to be 'concerned' that you cannot do it. You can help your mother, if you like, once you have helped yourself. Let's focus on you, now.
Your brother has learned how to be a 'man' from your father, whose cock fragile ego can only feel big if the women and girls in the family are beneath him. So he treads on them. He makes them feel small, and ensures their self-esteem is quashed. Often, this walks hand in hand with demeaning their academic pursuits as well.
He failed at stopping you going into Psychology in the first place. Yikes! He's afraid you're going to get an amazing education and subsequently be above him, and unsquashable.
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So what's the next step? Ah! Convince her that she's too emotionally weak to do it. This is a great tactic, because undoubtedly, your emotional reactions have been systematically (and at points, I'm sure, simultaneously) diminished and told that they're over-reactions. You've been taught that your emotions are weak, and annoying, and fragile, and simply wrong.
It's a brilliant tactic, because he has rendered you and your mother fragile and bullied over the years. Welcome to Gaslighting 101! Please remember, if you are systematically abused to the point where you believe this is normal, this is the behaviour you would come to expect from a romantic partner, too, and that generational cycle will continue.
You are made of porcelain and covered in cracks, so he seeks to apply just enough pressure to crush you. Your brother, who has learned how to be a 'man' from your father, is doing exactly what he's been taught. Men like this are afraid of powerful women, and education is power.
So now, you repair yourself with gold. View their words for what they are; bullying, and an attempt to oppress you.
Get your education. Access therapy and counselling services, because you need to unravel how this systematic male oppression has woven itself into you. There are roots in you, and they're rotten, but they can be remedied. YOU are not rotten. YOU are not weak. YOU are a threat to your father and brother; wear that as a badge of honour.
Physician, health thyself.
These weak little men are threatened by you.
Right now, they are winning. Don't fucking let them. You have a choice here; get sad, or get strong. The path you choose will determine the fabric of you as a person, and you are in charge.
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Come on, kiddo. That little central part of you is telling you that they're wrong, and it's absolutely correct. That's why you Inboxed me, right?
I wish I could be there to tear them apart for you, but this ball is in your court. The majority of the men in my family are like this, too, and you will find even now, as a powerful woman, they attempt to belittle me. It doesn't work and it is met with scorn, and god, it's so satisfying to watch these men shrivel.
I swear to god, work for this. You dedicate your time to yourself and your work. Absolutely smash this degree. Learn, and learn, because knowledge is power. Understand yourself, and forgive yourself.
You can do it, baby.
Be strong.
Love,
-- Haitch xxx
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thegeminisage · 7 months ago
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whoops, i almost forgot about the star trek update. tuesday we watched tng's "firstborn" and "bloodlines" and last night we watched ds9's "the wire" (honorific)
firstborn (tng):
i was actually bracing for this one to suck ass bc everyone says worf is a bad dad. and i dont think he is!!! like, it doesn't come as easily to him as it does to sisko, and he sometimes forgets to be gentle or kind with alexander because he's so laser focused on how things SHOULD be he forgets to the importance of taking others' feelings into account, but that's how he is ALL THE TIME with EVERYONE not just his kid. considering the circumstances i'd say he's doing well
before we get started, GREAT cameo from the duras sisters. i was initially really annoyed with their tit windows but im becoming rather fond
i really liked "the family protector guy "k'mter" at first because he said all the right things to alexander...like, it's scary not being able to defend yourself, etc. then he also was a dick to alexander and i was really exasperated...but then he IS alexander so that totally fixes it. he's angry with himself and conflicted and just wants a HUG FROM HIS DAD and that FIXED it!!! like when he said "nobody will look at you and see a human you are alone on this ship" initially it felt like racism but it being like, not quite self-loathing but just bitter experience...that's actually so clever
this is the only episode where they brought up alexander's mom kind of hating ""klingon stuff"" and how that could possibly have negatively impacted him and it only got two lines of dialogue but still. i think it's really damning that she hated her own heritage and also brought her kid up to hate it and now he's sort of out here...pretending to be human, almost, to the point where he doesn't want to participate in hsi own culture or even bond with his own father (a klingon). like it sucks so bad for him
i was afraid that the plot twist would be "k'mter talks alexander into wanting to be a warrior after all just when worf realizes he doesn't have to be" which would have been sad but a real "oh shit" of an ending. mixed feelings about them not doing that but i understand why they wanted to properly wrap things up for s7
i almost forgot but rare w for picard for bending the rules a little bit to give worf time to go to the klingon festival with his kid. credit where it is due
bloodlines (tng):
i have never been so BITTERLY DISAPPOINTED.......................
they gave. picard. an affair baby.
THEY GAVE HIM AN AFFAIR BABY!
what have i been saying since farpoint! he has an affair baby! AND THEY GAVE HIM ONE
AND THEN TOOK IT AWAY
what was the POINT OF THE EPISODE
if that's not his fucking affair child
pussy ass little FUCKS couldnt commit to changes...
i can't even remember what else happened in this episode i was so disappointed about this plot twist
oh yeah actually i do remember picard made a bald joke which i THINK was the only time he's done that in seven seasons? i think the only time ANYONE'S done it? please correct me if i am wrong but i was so shocked it got a big laugh out of me. also a rare w for picard. if he made bald jokes more often i'd hate him less maybe
oh yeah i'm coming back to add this later but it was really hilarious that picard was so torn up over his not-son being a little criminal. his horrific unforgivable spelunking crimes. so true.
the wire (ds9)
ooohhhhhhhhhhhh my god. oh my GOD. let's fucking...get into it
i rly thot garak was just a guy but not only is he a former assassin he's a current junkie. A JUNKIE! he's just like me fr
also, he can act? like that scene where he was withdrawing and saying horrible shit to julian......i was on the edge of my seat.
i love that he gave us 3 different stories about how he got kicked out. i'm gonna be honest, i looked it up, and apparently we never find out the truth? that is a bold fucking move. a daring choice. we, like julian, will never have any certainty. like, sure, i WANT to believe he released some kids from being tortured, but it's also equally as likely that he killed civilians or did a number of other horrible things
like, the fact that he can lie about it even while under significant distress.........king. like you could say oh that's the true one because that's the one where he was physically unwell but he also referred to "elim" in that one which gives it the ring of a potential falsehood
julian forgiving him anyway, even after all the horrible stuff he said, even after being physically ATTACKED (WHICH WAS SCARY!!! i was scared of him!!!!!) for "whatever he did," just because garak said "i need to know someone forgives me"..........AUGHGHGH JESUS CHRIST
THE FACT THAT HE WON'T TALK ABOUT IT. he won't tell even US what he did. eliot spencer core actually. i am beside myself about it all
maybe he's right and it is all true. maybe he destroyed a ship and framed a friend AND let some kids go. it's literally none of business though like he's not gonna tell us
anyway, i heard the term "brain implant" and nearly died on the spot, so 10/10 episode
honestly, they should have just upgraded this guy to a regular. he is so good
NEXT TIME: tng's "emergence" and ds9's "crossover" AND YES I KNOW THAT'S MIRRORVERSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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