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avatarmerida · 2 years ago

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Stay

I can’t focus on other thing rn becuse @turquoisespace35’s mythology AU has taken over my brain so here’s a little drabble I wrote for it based mostly on this and this part 💛💚

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“I don’t want you to go.”

He said it as firmly as he could. He had practiced it over and over again but still his voice shook. She had been honest with him from day one and there was still so much he hadn’t told her. He knew it might be selfish, might be impossible, might be too much, but he also knew she wouldn’t want him to hold it in. It wasn’t an order or request or even an invitation, it more like like a dream.

Once the moon entered the sky the gates would open and she would be able to leave. No one had ever been able to leave before. How ironic the one person who could was the only one he didn’t want to. He didn’t have a good reason or solid argument. It wasn’t logical or practical but it was true. He just knew that he wanted her to stay with him, everything else was just noise.

“What?” She asked in a tone Hunter couldn’t quite place. Was she shocked? Offended? Scared? Or had she just not heard him?

“I… want you to stay,” he tried rephrasing it. Maybe this was more honest. He didn’t want to be too honest too quickly because he knew what he really wanted was too much. He wanted every minute of every hour to be touched by her presence. He wanted to experience every sunrise and sunset with her. He wanted to cover his dreary island with vibrant flowers for her and sit beneath the apple tree as they exchanged stories. He wanted stories with her, he wanted to make memories they could revisit and share and have more time together than they had apart. He wanted the complicated simplicity she has shown him for the rest of his days. He wanted to ensure she knew nothing but kindness and gratitude for the rest of hers.

But above all he wanted her.

“But Hunter, I have to go back…” she started just as he knew she would.

“I know, I know,” he stammered, looking at the ground. “I know you do. I know you have a life back there. I know you have friends and your fathers and a future but I just… I needed to tell you. I know it’s crazy but I just needed to tell you or I’d regret it but Willow I just… can’t imagine the island without you.”

She smiled. “I have to go back,” she said again, scooting over to sit closer to him, reaching over to bring his face up to see hers. “To tell everyone how wonderful you really are.”

“What?”

“The emperor can’t keep spreading these lies about you,” she said softly, a few of his snakes nuzzling her hand to help express Hunter’s joy. “You’re not a monster and I won’t let him keep sending soldiers here to hurt you. All these statues, I know they were made out of fear. I know you would never try to hurt anyone. I know you’re kind, and sweet, and smart and me going back alive and unharmed will prove that. I need them to know you like I know you.”

I don’t care if they know me, he though. I only care if you do.

“And when I come back, I’ll bring you the sweet bread my dad makes and we can have a proper picnic when we watch the sunset and maybe figure out how-.”

“You’d come back?” He said breathlessly.

“Of course I will,” she said simply, scratching the closest snake to her on the top of its head. Will, she had said. Will, not would. A promise not a possibility. She didn’t even hesitate. “I’d miss you too much. All of you.”

“But why?” It would be easier to stay away, it would be understandable. He didn’t want it to be true so he wasn’t sure why he wanted her to put more thought into it. He just couldn’t understand how she could be so sure of him.

“Because I like you.” Again, she didn’t hesitate. She didn’t flinch. If she needed to lie she could’ve said anything, but Hunter knew she didn’t need or want to lie. She never had before.

“I… I like you too.” He said softly and the snakes hissed at him to speak up! They agreed! Say it again! Say it louder! Say it with confidence! “We uh, all like you.”

Her hand remained on the side of his face, her thumb gently brushing his cheek. She did this often, saying it help her memorize his features. The fact that she found them worth remembering made Hunter’s heart spin. He leaned into the touch and placed his hand over hers, intending to hold it there as long as she would allow. “So it’s settled then.”

He more than just liked her. He liked apples, he liked to read, but she was more than sustainably or a way to pass the time. She was his whole world.

“But what if they don’t let you come back?” He whispered, feeling unshed tears stinging his eyes. They had sent her here to die and when they saw she hadn’t, what would be next? Would she be celebrated? Would they send her to islands with more to fear to test her abilities? Would they deem her sentence unserved and try to kill her again? “W-what if they don’t believe you or what i-if they-.”

“Hey,” she cut him off and pressed her forehead to his. The snakes rested atop her head and by her checks, her calmness contagious. Their silence gave Hunter a moment of peace, a chance to focus on this moment with her. She was not worried. Somehow she was so sure of everything. She was so sure of him. She was so sure of this. “Have I ever lied to you?”

“No.”

“So when I say I’m coming back, I’m coming back,” she said with confidence. “I’m not gonna let the emperor or the rules or anyone stop me. I don’t know how they’ll respond but I have to try. You deserve that. But no matter what, I will be back with you.”

“I just… want to keep you safe.” He admitted, turning his head to the side to kiss her hand before bringing it down to their side. Their fingers danced together until they delicately intertwined as though they could not be kept apart. He knew she could take care of herself. He knew she was strong and tough and smart. But he also knew how cruel the outside world had been to her and he would do anything to ensure she was only treated the way she deserved to be treated for the rest of her days. He looked down at their hands, how they fit together so naturally. They shouldn’t work, but they did.

“You have,” she whispered, resting her nose beside his. He could feel her breath hovering across his lips. There was something else in her voice, as though he had done something else. As though she knew there was more he wanted and she was waiting and wanting to tell him he had that too.

This would not be his last night with her. They would have more long walks talking about nothing and everything. They would have more quiet evenings making up stories and blissful mornings gathering berries and finding reasons to be near each other. But there was something that a night like this inspired. Maybe it was the chatty snakes atop his head who had been constantly pleading with him to do all of this much sooner. But the sunset seemed to linger to offer them the ambience, as though telling the moon it could not come to open the gate until Willow had a farewell worth remembering. Until she knew exactly what she was returning to.

“I just… want to keep you… because…”

He didn’t give her a chance to ask for him to clarify as the small space between them vanished as his mouth covered hers. His other hand rose up to cup her cheek as he dared to repeatedly press his lips to hers. He wanted her to know it was purposeful. He wanted to give her the chance to pull away, but she seemed just as drawn to him as she titled her head to follow him as he moved.

Their lips had touched once before, after he had shown her the spot where the sunset was the brightest on the island. It has been only a moment and he had convinced himself it was accidental, that she had merely been trying to see him better.

But this, oh he knew what this was. He wanted her to know too. It was all the words he couldn’t say, that he didn’t know how to say, that hadn’t been invented yet. The snakes went crazy and hummed and hissed as they tried to process the emotions he felt. But it was too strong and too new and so they trusted him to sort it out for himself, not wanting to spoil anything. It was every time he wanted to be closer to her but walked away, it was a question and explanation all in one, it was natural and unnatural at the same time. His feelings for her were so simple, but that was what made them complicated. This was a goodbye and hello wrapped into one. This beautiful, building contradiction that she returned with vigor, reaching out to place her free hand on his waist to pull him closer.

“Well I guess I don’t have to leave right away,” she said softly as he pulled away for a brief moment to breathe. Her breathing was labored and her face was flushed as she let go of his hand to wrap her arm around her neck to bring him back down to her as she deepened the kiss. Hunter felt as though he was about to burst, feeling her lips form a smile against his. They were so soft and Hunter was so focused on how comfortable and warm he felt that he relaxed and crashed into her, nearly falling off the bench as Willow proceeded to kiss him with power and eagerness. But Hunter managed to steady them, not intending on letting clumsiness end the moment early as his whole world held him tightly.

He moved his arms to the small of her back, holding her just as tightly as he was convinced he was about to float away and only she could keep him bound to the earth. They both knew that her mission would not be simple, would not easy. They didn’t not know how long they would be apart. They didn’t know what trials awaited them. They only knew what they meant to each other, and they believed that this feeling was strong enough to endure anything and everything.

Willow let out a small laugh, and Hunter didn’t think much of it. He loved the sound of her laugh, the more of her that could be in the moment the better. But then her laugh became louder and a Hunter became worried he was doing something wrong. He had never kissed anyone before but he was fairly certain it wasn’t usually a laughing matter. As he slowly pulled away to see the cause, she followed him not wanting to leave the moment. She laughed again.

He looked and saw the source: the snakes were peppering her face with tiny kisses of their own.

“Sorry, hehe, it tickles,” she giggled as the snakes continued, much to his horror (though he could hardly blame them). But he quickly got over it, as the sight of her laughing in the rosy pink light of the setting sun drew him back in as he lunged forward to reunite their lips.

This time he did cause them to fall off the bench and Willow laughed as she was surrounded in affection. She hadn’t even left yet and already she missed him.

As Hunter and Willow continued to prolong their farewell, they didn’t notice the moon enter position. There was no urgency to act when it did, they had a few hours to seize it. But as the door opener slowly, three soldiers cautiously entered the domain. Swords at the ready, hearts determined, Luz, Amity and Gus walked forward to recuse their friend. A year of training had prepared them for anything, they had no idea what the monster was capable of. Luz scanned their surrounding when a familiar laugh made her cast her eyes down to the ground. She drew her sword and called to the others in panic.

“Oh my Titan, the monster is trying to eat Willow’s face!”

#huntlow #huntlow au #toh au #willow park #hunter toh #huntlow mythology au #huntlow fanfiction #winter toh

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caffernnn · 1 year ago

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Free! Anniversary Fic Recs 🦋🐋🐬🦈🐧 Can you share your fav fics from each year (2013-2023) Free! has been around?

This is a very fun ask!! Lemme root through my bookmarks and see what I can find 😅

2013 - A lot of the stories I have saved from this time are shorter lil one-shots like “Never Leave” by Shimegami (classic mh hug-it-out interlude fic) and “The Sound of Settling” by teke (feelings realization stuff), but one other one I liked was “The Ocean You Gave My Heart” by miaoujones. Smut warning for that one (if that’s not your thing), but something about desert-bound Makoto learning to swim and indulge in water with Haru, thinking upon meeting him that he’s a wonder whether he’s really a mermaid or not, that’s neat!!

2014 - starting to realize the ones I kept any note of from the early years are some of the popular mh fics probably already recommended 10 times over, but there’s a reason why people sing their praises. If you haven’t checked out fics from tide tothemoon like 2/13189000 (mhtokyo my beloved), their writing is *chef’s kiss* delightful. Another AU I haven’t been able to bring myself to revisit was orihime’s reincarnation stories from “I cannot be without you, matter of fact.” There are two different stories, one where Makoto remembers their past lives and a follow up where Haru remembers, and oh that made me ache dude.

2015 - Speaking of suffering, have y’all checked out Heart’s Departure yet? I think we’ve referenced and talked about that story enough for it to speak for itself 🥴 heartbreaking circumstances but still cosmic and so so beautiful. Then, once you’re done crying about that story, hop over to “Shake the Heavens” by Ad_Astra to break down over (what I described in my ao3 bookmark) Makoto and Haru’s “inherently cataclysmic devotion.” I guess 2015 was the year of shoving the boys into tragic AUs and seeing how much they were willing to give up to get back to each other. A whole vibe

2016 - let’s goooo gamers, more AUs!! “I’d Create Oceans For You” by trashness is a fun fantasy adventure that has both tender moments and interesting action (and some banger art from donguris omggg). If you want something more future-fish-flavored that shows that happily-ever-after doesn’t save you from your grief, “Sublimation” by RedScribbler was great. You can find more of my thoughts on that one if you scroll back a bit in my “fic recs” tag — one of y’all sent it in and yeeees it was so up my alley!

2017 - Alright fellas, there are so many to choose from, because now we’re getting into the macbetha years! Who would I be if I didn’t mention “Eyes Wide Open All The Time” tbh?? It’s a long one with its own hard-hitting involved lore and world-building, but Beth builds this unique story in a way that pulls from the characters we know and love so effectively. I’ve sung the praises for this story multiple times (and could so do it again bro don’t tempt me) but I’ll end off with saying that if you’re fascinated in watching deeply-wounded people who’ve been put through hell learn how to make a life in the aftermath, there’s something special for you here. Aaaand, if you want something about 1/10 the length and not as heavy, “159 (Architect/Interior Designer AU)” by intoxicatedcinnamon has some fun moments 😌 that’s another one where you can find more of my thoughts somewhere in the fic recs tag (love when y’all send me stories 💚💙)

2018 - “Coral and Bone” by Macbetha my beloved!!!! Wanna play mermaids and fight the gods? Maybe try to find that summer magic that makes you want to keep going and accidentally fall in love on the way? I am puuushing you toward this story bestie. Everyone’s here and everyone’s having fun! OH ALSO I’m throwing in “Night Changes” by SEMellark because I love stories where Makoto and Haru actually figure out how to talk to each other. (Side note — a lot of these are probably gonna be things I’ve rec’d in the past, so feel free to scroll my tag for more details and consider this list an extra endorsement 😅)

2019 - (drops basket full of love for mutuals) OOPS OOPS OOPS!!! Don’t mind me, just popping in with some “Let’s Get Married” by sagesprouts and “Anthropocene” by testosterogna, nothing to see here but some classic natsunao shenanigans and one of the sickest elemental bender AUs out there 😌✨ I also have some fics from Svana saved from this year, but I’ll be mentioning her again later so hold on okay!!

2020 - alright, now the list is getting longer with everyone jumping back in during the early pandemic days 🏃🏻‍♀️SO FIRST OFF “green eyes, you’re the one I wanted to find” by infinite_always is an absolute FLUFF FEST of a soulmate AU! Unbearably tender moments but who doesn’t love that every so often? OH AND we have another one of my all-time ultimate fic recs here!! “Reaching” by CupNoodles55 has shaped and reshaped how I look back at Eternal Summer in the way I’d want any great canon-compliant fic to. Big love for interlude scenes and extra bits that help recontextualize or deepen what a moment could’ve meant in the show. Gonna end off 2020 with “The Sea Aflame” by Dizzydodo because even though this urban fantasy story is unfinished, I was super drawn in by the prospects of dragon!Makoto and whatever god stuff was going on with Sousuke. An interesting universe I love thinking about again from time to time.

2021 - Starting off strong with “love on the water, love underwater (and so on)” by rudimentaryflair because we love introspection here!!! Lovely writing style with lines that make me want to scale the walls. This take on Makoto is so so special. Also gonna rec “To Clear Away Today” by suhmayzooka (omg hiiii) if you want to be thrown into another hard-hitting intricate AU with loads of potential. Love exploring what we’ve got to see of the world so far 💞 and OOOH IT’S TIME!! “Extraordinary” by Svana_Vrika is basically canon to me at this point. Svana has a lot of sweet shorter stories with Makoto and Haru (look here, look here), but this one is everythinggg my guy. Similar appeal to “Reaching” mentioned earlier: a story of interludes that bring the story we already know to life in a delightful new way. Required reading for mhtokyo fans forreal. ONE LAST ONE OKAY!! “Teacher” by VeloxVoid is a great future fic with teacher!Makoto and artist!Haru (and I’m not biased just bc it was a gift exchange for me with details fit to my specific tastes wdym🧍🏻). Domestic blisssss

2022 - Ooh we’ve almost caught up y’all ☺️ gonna start with “All This and Heaven Too” by SocksAreArgyle because sometimes the bestie crafts a smorgasbord of smut with a delicious throughline of character/relationship development baked in. If you want your choice of spicy makoharus or some character exploration, you’re SET with this one. Next is “I Let My Heart Go” by martincrieff because sometimes the bestie looks at poor pining Makoto and goes “you know what would be messed up?” AND I JUST !!! So full of love and now full of flower petals. Hanahaki!Makoto my dearest boy!! Aaaand ending off the year with some tender mh (to Ikuya’s detriment) in “The Night Train” by Lizzyboo. They’re so softtt with each other and UGH this story is so nice. Love watching people take the crumbs from FS/FS2 and make a meal 💜

2023 - The year is young! And old! So here’s some more, with who knows how many bangers yet to come 🎉 First going to throw in the Makoharu Week 2023 collection for your perusal because I saw some fantastic stories emerge from that event. If you have twitter, I’d recommend also seeing some of the threadfics posted over there from the event as well 💚💙 and I thiiink I’m gonna close off for now with “just like it was always meant to be” by tonfea because they’ve been putting out banger stories that deserve all the love. Haru introspection is one of those things that isn’t always done very well (which is especially hard to reckon with in older fics) but tonfea’s stories all have an intimate understanding about Haru’s mind and journey that just makes sense.

Alright hello we made it to the end!!! Might’ve thrown in more than expected but I hope makoharu enjoyers find something on this list that fits their fancy 🥲 (and if anyone wants to rec something or ramble about a story here that they loved I’m all ears)

#fic recs #makoharu #oops all makoharu #a wonderful stroll through the past decade #(also I didn’t tag people but quite a few of the people I mentioned are here so uhh hiiiiii)#thanks for sending <3 #anonymous

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waterthecoconut · 5 months ago

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Hello, how r u doing?

wanted to ask if there’s any chance you’ll continue your fics? i know they are finished, but is there any possibility you’d expand on hurts to breathe or should i be kind? or are you writing other fanfics and don’t plan on returning to those aus?

hello! i’m doing okay, thanks for asking ☺️ i hope you are doing well as well! <3

‘should i be kind’ is complete and it’s my absolute favorite and i love everything about it, the sort of mystery and strange ambiguity around it where you don’t know how Lloyd and Harumi are in the relationship that they are in (with her being a ghost and Lloyd somehow adjusting to her) and then how it later ends with them accepting their circumstances and each other. i honestly could go on and on with that world because it is very interesting to me and i loved llorumi’s dynamic in that, but i’d like to leave it alone where whatever happens next is entirely up to your imagination. i think it’s very nice and satisfying that way 🫧

as for ‘hurts to breathe’… i do admit that it ends very abruptly and i apologize for that 😓 i had originally planned ‘hurts to breathe’ to be a pretty lengthy, possibly multiple chapter fic where Lloyd undergoes a harsh and processing mental battle to differentiate this suddenly new and sweet Harumi from the old Harumi that brutally traumatized him in the past, taking llorumi here in a dark direction, and eventually ending with Lloyd learning how to heal… or who knows how it would’ve ended (i’m fickle like that 😌). it sounded really cool in my head, but i also had the idea of ‘should i be kind’ mingling in my head at the same time and i decided i wanted to prioritize one and write the other short and sweet and simplified.

i completely understand the dissatification from ‘hurts to breathe’ because it does end so suddenly and maybe i might revisit it someday in the far future, and i at least definitiely do want to revisit writing llorumi in a really dark setting 😈

as of right now, i’m focusing on writing new fics that i hope i’ll be able to finish soon! thank you so much for asking 💓 and i apologize for how long it took me to reply 😅

#ask #coco writes

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revenantpoet · 2 years ago

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- @RevenantPoet

Text Version:

(scum)

We’re all filth A mesh of flesh and bone and dirt and rot A jagged and crumbling precipice of life and death One a shove from tumbling and ripping and tearing On jagged-sharp stones To rock bottom

There is no good We’re all selfish We want what we don’t deserve We take what we haven’t earned We are the gods of our own universe A projection that matters And exists Only to us

We choose what to care about We put value only on what matters to us We cling to the people we choose Selfish Draining them dry Putting them first only when it suits our own interests After all, they aren’t people They’re tools to only grieve when no longer available

We bend to the whims of others when it benefits us Even when others Are crushed beneath our shifting weight We place our own pain first Our own circumstance above anything else We expect others to trust us When we change allegiance at convenience When we crack and crumble our personal beliefs For profits For safety Even if it kills us in the end We will always follow the path of least resistance Less pain Less trouble

We sink into isolation to save others from ourselves But no one really benefits Except for the one escaping We hide from our truths Our realities Our fears Pretending it’s for our own self-preservation When it’s really our own comfort we chase Our routine Our sanity At the expense of anything or anyone underfoot Our knowledge and safety is a right that’s only exclusive to us Even when it violates the right of another

We blind ourselves to our own faults and feelings To save ourselves Knowing that in return we trample over everyone Even those who reach our way in return Our selfishness saves us at the cost of others Though we know that it’s truly ourselves that we cannot survive To be such a disgusting person That even we have to hide from ourselves We don’t deserve to be able to avoid it But our armor is thick and sharp It impales others without thought Pushing through and shoving down the world around us

We are all criminals Perpetrators of our own greedy needs and thoughts Hands that reach out and take and take and take Except….

Except… When you reach out your hand And you take mine With no ownership With no demand With no driving force With no selfishness With no blindness

You reach out, warm fingers entwined with mine Mine, that are cold Barely alive Only knowing the touch that takes And still, you only reach out Because it’s me Because it’s you And that’s enough

We’re enough

*rises from the grave* Hello again! Life's been hell, but I found an older poem I wrote for this series the other day, shined it up, and thought it seemed a fitting way to close off this little collection. Kind of a combination of where I started and where I am? And touching on the character growth of all the characters, not just the main ship.

Not that I may not revisit the series in the future--I'm still absolutely feral over them. I'm just so very tired, and having so many "unfinished" projects makes me anxious. (I'll probably make a cover/ebook for this one like I did with my Sasaki to Miyano and Sabikui Bisco poetry! If you download the collection through AO3, I think you can add a cover to a file through a free program like Calibre. I'll slap a link here when I make one!) I'll update this project if/when I come back, or who knows! Maybe I'll do an AU fic like my current project.

Thank you so, so much to everyone who's given this collection a chance <3 I hope you're all doing okay on your side of the screen!

#The Night Beyond the Tricornered Window #Sankaku Mado no Sotogawa wa Yoru #sankakumado no sotogawa wa yoru #Hiyakawa Rihito #Mikado Kousuke #Poetry #Poem #Poets and Writers #Poets on Tumblr #Poets of Tumblr #Writble #Writeblr #My words

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ficsyoumayhavemissed · 3 years ago

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it’s only for the brave — sunflower_lwt / @hometothecanyonmoon

2.247 words / Liam x Tom Daley

My love, all I want is to protect you. I gave my heart to you a long time ago and I never got it back. I love you, I adore you, I love who I am when I’m with you.

Always in my heart, Tom Daley.

Yours sincerely,

Liam Payne.

This fic somehow manages to be a journey of emotion in so few words. There’s so much fear and angst over a love possibly lost, a future left uncertain, and a past full of regret. But the author leaves the story open-ended, closing off with a little room for hope.

i’ll meet you anytime you want (in our italian restaurant) — alwaysgolden / @hsmp3

3.239 words / Harry x Louis

harry and louis reunite after ten years in their favorite restaurant, reminiscing about the past and revisiting old feelings.

This absolutely adorable fic is the author’s first published work (thankfully, they have posted more since!) and while it’s fairly short, it’s an absolute treasure. The shyness and nostalgia between the two friends blend into a perfect atmosphere that’s sure to keep you smiling the entire time you read. (Warnings: mentions of death)

It's Poutine Bitch! — @haztobegood

3.950 words / @harryandmenfest / Harry x Mitch Rowland

“What is that?”

“This?” Harry pointed his fork at the plate. “It’s poutine.”

The man gazed longingly at the heaped plate. “Looks good.”

"Go ahead and take one, bitch.”

Everything about this fic is absolutely hilarious! From the title over the narration to the dialogue – it’s absolutely wonderful. Go ahead and read this feel-good-fic if you need something to cheer you up, a bit of a laugh, and a story that will make you feel warm.

baby I'll never leave (if you keep holding me this way) — we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed

6.438 words / @1dclicheficfest / Harry x Louis

His fingers curl around the first thing he can find that would be suitable as a weapon, an umbrella that has a rather impressive looking metal pin at the end. He holds it in front of him the way he imagines people hold a sword, tiptoeing through his living room until he can find whoever’s in his kitchen. He briefly considers calling 999, figures that if someone’s trying to burgle him, he should probably not be a hero and actually rely on professionals to arrest them, but he’s never been the type to sit back and wait, and -- is that singing?

It is singing. Whoever is trying to rob him is in his kitchen, singing an eighties pop song under their breath.

And they made cookies?

All about this fic is beautiful. The author has made a wonderful impression of the character development – plus it’s hilarious and cute. It portrays a ray of hope for everyone struggling with the current worldwide situation bringing an ‘everything’s gonna be fine’ message to the reader. Give it a chance!

It’s Probably Because I’ve Got a Big Lesbian Crush on You — yeah_alright / @uhoh-but-yeah-alright

6.614 words / @wordplayfics / Harry x Louis

Harry's never really concerned herself with being part of the popular crowd. But as the new girl in school the second semester of her junior year, she finds herself unwittingly competing for Queen Bee status against high school royalty Louis Tomlinson. Maybe there's more to their rivalry than it seems.

A not-quite-Mean Girls AU

Are you in need of a sweet, interesting, and funny Girl!Direction fic that you won’t be able to put down? Look no further: This fic has it all! Just the essence of Mean Girls with the perfect amount of the author’s own twists and turns that will leave you smiling all the way through!

sweet music playing in the dark — solvetheminourdreams / @solvetheminourdreams

12.753 words / Harry x Louis

“Just get in.”

“I don’t even know you,” Louis continues lightly, hand already inching toward the door.

Harry laughs, shaking his head. “No, but I’m willing to take the risk if you are.”

Or the one where Harry wants nothing more than to hear From Eden live and Louis just needs to pay off some parking tickets.

This fic is a great mixture of humorous and sweet! Louis’ characterization is just great, and the chaos of the plot is very fun. A must read for those days you need something a little unexpected to make you smile.

light somewhere, in the distance — wordsnnotes / @quelsentiment

26.011 words / Zayn x Liam x Louis

“You’ll be paired up with one partner in each place.”

Zayn frowns.

“A partner?”

“Yes, that’s the way it goes,” the angel nods. “Everyone gets a partner. Sometimes it’s people from your previous life, if you used to be together or could have been together if death hadn’t separated you. But most times, it’s not someone you know. In any case, we’re always very careful about pairing up people who are compatible together.”

Or: a Zouiam love triangle set in the afterlife. Loosely based on The Good Place

This fic is so intense in the best way: it gives you the chance to shed a few tears on a bad day while giving you the warmest hug at the end to make sure you’re alright. The worldbuilding in The Good Place fashion is done fantastically and it matches the relationship developments so well. It’s definitely worth a read.

—-

As always, support the authors by leaving kudos and comments! Happy reading!

If you love a fic that has gotten less love than you think it deserves, submit it to us so we can check it out and add it to one of our recs! We would love to be able to spread more love to underappreciated fics! — FYMHM xx

#hlcreators #tracksintheam #trackinghome #trackinghappily #hljournal #hlsource #fic rec #fymhm #september 2021

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lambourngb · 3 years ago

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a skeleton of something more [2/6]

previously here. malex wip fic. a short serial leading up the premiere.

spoilers for the trailer and promo, will be instantly AU. If I’m going to the trouble of writing a malex fix-it for the season 3 opener, why not fix 2x13 too?

**** THEN ****

After Alex closed Tripp’s journal, he met Michael’s gaze across the table at the Crashdown.

His golden-brown eyes were heavy with pain, the reminder of how his mother’s story had ended was still fresh between them despite the span of months since the fiery end of Caulfield. What had resulted in being the fiery end of them, even though Alex hadn’t known it at the time. The look of sleeplessness in Michael’s face reminded Alex, that outside of this small piece of Nora, he had the weight of Maria still in the hospital recovering from the pathogen Flint had released. The press of the Deep Sky ring in his pocket warred with the hesitation to place one more burden on Michael, would the abacus of their fragile friendship balance out?

He flashed to that last argument in Michael’s bunker, a disaster of his own making, thinking he could believe in his father, but thankfully harm was averted at Crashcon. That recent memory was motive enough for Alex to decide. Whatever happened next, he needed Michael on the same page with him.

As Isobel moved to leave the table, explaining to Michael that she needed to check on Max, Alex held Michael’s gaze deliberately. Then he folded his fingers down, until the last three fanned out in a downward W.

“After what happened with Maria, maybe you should come with me, Michael. You can help me shake some sense into Max,” Alex heard, tuning back into Isobel’s voice. Her eyes moved back and forth between them, a crease of suspicion wrinkling her upturned nose, as she stopped on him. “It’ll be a good distraction.”

Without looking at Isobel, Michael’s eyes remained trained on Alex’s hand. “No, thanks, I’m good here. I’ve had my fill of stubborn ass people who don’t want to listen to sensible advice from me, so I’ll catch up with you later, Isobel.”

She made a dismissive huff but did not argue, leaving with the barest semblance of a polite goodbye to Alex, but that was typical Isobel Evans. Michael waited until his sister was on the other side of the door, before speaking quietly, his gaze finally moving up from Alex’s hands to his face. “I haven’t seen you flash that sign to me in years.”

“Glad to know you haven’t forgotten it.”

“You, making the ‘wait for me, I want you now’ signal? Nah, that’s been burned into my brain over the years.” Michael said it with a faint trace of bitterness. “I guess news travels fast, Maria only dumped my ass this morning.”

Alex winced and looked down, swallowing the surprise and spark of hope that welled in his throat at that disclosure. It was better to concentrate on the unique talent he had of stepping on landmines around Michael, than wonder about what had happened with Maria. It looked like he was still good at causing harm without intention, judging by the stung bite in Michael’s voice. “Fuck, I’m sorry, I didn’t know. I wouldn’t have-”

“No, I’m sorry,” Michael cut off his apology firmly with a wave of his hand, calling a time-out. Alex waited, his teeth pressed into his lower lip as Michael rubbed his eyes with a weary half-smile. “I’m being an asshole right now, and that’s not fair to take it out on you. It’s been a shitty day already, and — anyway, … you definitely know how to get my attention, Alex.” He tilted his head, self-deprecation on his face, “for better or worse, you’ve always been good at that.”

It had been the sign they had developed whenever their paths had crossed over the years while Alex had been on leave in Roswell, but it had started that summer after high school. After Michael’s hand had healed poorly from Jesse, the last three fingers had been left frozen in a claw, it had been a shared fuck-you to his dad to use it to form their own secret communication. A three-fingered W, turned upward meant it wasn’t a good time, and he would find Michael later; turned downward, well, that meant it was safe to approach him, and it had often ended in a hurried blowjob in his car. Perhaps he should have used more care in using it now, but Michael wasn’t the only one running on the fumes of insomnia and stress. “Sorry, I needed to talk to you, and I wanted to make sure you didn’t leave with Isobel-”

“It’s fine, really. It’s not a bad memory either, remembering that we had our little secret language.” Michael wiggled his fingers in reassurance, his left hand still wrapped with a bandanna. “I can make that signal a hell of a lot easier now, too. But anyway, what did you need?”

There was still a voice inside Alex’s head that said ‘you’, no matter how long it had been. He shoved that down deep, along with his curiosity about Maria, and concentrated on his purpose. “Your advice on something, and then if it’s not too much to ask, your help.”

“Anything.”

Alex blinked, nonplussed by the easy acceptance.

Michael gestured encouragingly, “seriously, anything, just tell me what’s going on because the way you’re hemming and hawing, it is freaking me out.” Suddenly, all expression washed out of Michael’s face as a horrible thought occurred to him. “Did you get deployed or something?”

“Not exactly, not how you’re thinking,” he winced at the earned glare from Michael as he continued to stall while the words still tripped and fumbled around his mouth, heedless to the mounting frustration between them both. He sighed, and regrouped. Pushing the closed journal aside, Alex dug into his pocket and laid the signet ring on the table before Michael. “Let me start at the beginning, I found this in my dad’s things.”

“Jesse never seemed like a jewelry kind of guy to me.” Michael picked up the ring, examining it closely with a sarcastic smirk. “Other than parading around town with that wedding ring, when everyone knows your mom left him back during the Bush years, Dubya that is.”

“My father is all, was all, about appearances.” Alex placed the photo of the group on the table, sliding it over to him. “That ring marked his membership in this paramilitary group called Deep Sky. Every man in that photo worked at Caulfield, at one time or another.” He tapped his finger over the face of his father, then moved it to the right. “That’s my dad, and that is Ricky Long.”

Michael frowned, pulling the picture closer to squint at the faces. “Wyatt’s dad?”

“No, Forrest’s.”

“Nazi guy? Seriously?” He rubbed at his chin, the stubble longer than usual painting his jawline. Alex dragged his eyes away with effort as Michael considered that information. There was a reluctant understanding in his eyes, having recalled that Forrest Long wasn’t just ‘Nazi Guy’ to Alex, but someone who had expressed interest in Alex. Personal interest. “I guess that’s something you guys have in common then, dirtbag dads.”

He didn’t look thrilled to admit that to Alex, but it was a mark of how far they had both come as friends that Michael had said it anyway regardless. It was kind of him. It was the same type of empathy Alex had extended toward Michael, when he had expressed interest in Maria. Cut open, bleeding under his skin from all the ways he had squandered his own chances, he had said something similar to Michael once upon a time. That was what love was all about. Then he had kept saying it, until he believed it most days because wanting Michael to be happy was the easier ask.

It was a gracious sentiment that was entirely wasted by Michael when it came to Forrest Long.

“It would be, uh, something to bond over, if I hadn’t noticed that Forrest wears the same ring now.”

Michael’s eyes sharpened. “Family heirloom or do you think he worked at Caulfield?”

“I don’t know, but he is an ex-Army vet.” Alex tapped the photo of the members gathered together, “That was part of what I’ve been looking into, identifying everyone who worked at Caulfield right until the end. As for Deep Sky, I don’t know if it’s military service, Caulfield, or a family legacy that ties every member together, I just know that Dad kept in touch with those who were involved at the prison.”

“Makes sense, Jesse was able to get a hold of the atomizer and pathogen that Charlie developed from somewhere. For all of his strutting around at Crashcon with a uniform on, that didn’t look like it was an official use of government property.”

“Right, it definitely wasn’t, and before you tell me to leave it alone-” Alex began, remembering Michael’s response to the investigation into 1947. He had considered Alex’s actions back then to be an act of futility, something that could only hurt by being revisited. The past being the past, unable to be altered.

This time Michael cut him off, “No, I was wrong about that. I, um, I finally realized that just because I don’t see you connected to that place or the rest of your family, doesn’t mean you don’t. And while I wish that you didn’t, Alex, if digging into this gives you some sort of peace over it, then do it.”

Alex looked down, feeling the weight of relief that Michael understood. After his father’s body had been removed, after the questions and lies had been spun, he had spent the entire night sleepless over having been made into an effective weapon to force Michael’s compliance. Helena had known where all the weak spots were thanks to Flint, and had armed herself with a depowering agent. Once Flint was recovered, there was nothing stopping him from employing a similar tactic in the future.

“If anyone’s going to destroy me, it might as well be you.” Michael had once declared with a bold carelessness that had infuriated and terrified Alex at the time, but that was nothing compared to now having a lived experience to back it up. His mind had easily used the memory of Maria’s collapse after the faintest exposure at the Crashcon and had exchanged her with Michael, being torn apart molecule by molecule, by an invisible threat.

Give him an enemy that he could see any day, especially one that bled.

“I’ve been fighting so long, I don’t know what peace looks like anymore.” Alex held out his hand for the ring, and Michael gently laid it in his palm, brushing his fingertips over Alex’s skin. A lifetime of controlling himself kept the reaction off his face as he rubbed his thumb over the raised emblem of Deep Sky. “But I have learned recently that when something seems too good to be true, it is.”

Neither of them mentioned Jesse and his performance from the last few months, but Michael frowned again, “Wait a second, you think Forrest targeted you on purpose?”

“A member of a secret paramilitary organization just happens to ask me out after I was involved in the destruction of Caulfield? You really think that’s a coincidence?” Alex raised his eyebrow skeptically at Michael, before looking out the window to watch the pedestrians on the street.

“I think you’re the hottest guy in Roswell, so I’m not surprised he asked you out.” Michael flushed a little when Alex turned back to stare at him in surprise over the flattering comment. “Seriously, you’re a catch, but I will agree, it’s not a good look that he’s got that ring. But maybe it’s crap he wears because of his dad, and he’s got no idea he’s parading around?”

“You’re being awfully generous.”

“Isn’t that what you want? Because last time I checked, you were the one telling me that I should have faith in people, even if they give me no reason to.” Michael flattened his hands on the table, drawing Alex’s attention to the bandanna on his hand again. That damn fight kept echoing between them to Alex’s dismay, but Michael didn’t let him linger over it, “While I stand by what I said about Jesse, ‘cause he messes us both up, all I know about Forrest Long is that he is way too interested in Nazi history and he has good taste in guys.” Michael wetted his lips, nervously to tack on, “I also know that I trust you, and your instincts, so if you say there’s something not right about him, then I believe you.”

“There’s something not right about him,” Alex repeated seriously.

“Then I believe you, so what do you need me to do?”

“He wants to get close to me for some reason, probably related to what I know about aliens, so I’m going to let him. And I need you to back me up in case something goes wrong, and maybe use that lock pick you have in your brain?” Alex waited until Michael nodded in agreement, feeling the swell of gratitude at his support. Anyone else would probably think he was being paranoid, or that this was a delayed reaction to his father trying to kill them, but Michael, for all of his previous counter-arguments, had never truly believed in the good of humanity. Maybe in a few days, Alex would feel guilty in relying on that. Maybe in a few days, his suspicions about Forrest would be eliminated.

“He’s involved in running the open mike night at the Wild Pony with Maria, so I thought maybe I could perform a song or something? He drives a Prius, and while he’s listening to me sing, you could slip out mid-song and insert this into the code reader of his car.”

On the table was a small device that mimicked a thumb drive, small and black. It was the type of technology that Alex had used in the Air Force, tracking terrorists abroad. It had taken a fair amount of searching to purchase the equivalent stateside to have on hand. Michael picked it up curiously, turning over his hands.

“It’s designed to download the GPS history of his car,” Alex explained, before rubbing the back of his head in thought. “That’s how I uncovered what my dad was up to, first by tracking his movements. If I let Forrest take me home, I can gain access to his laptop and phone.”

Michael furrowed his brow in concern, “You’re really willing to go that far? And what if he is involved in something shady, what then?”

“My father and brother both used me to get to you, there’s really nothing I wouldn’t do to keep that from happening again and if it means playing along with this guy, letting him lead me to the members of Deep Sky? Then I will.” If anything, his words only deepened the concern on Michael’s face, but Alex had been committed for a long time. Since the red level threat. Since the short ride to the recruitment office. Maybe as far back as his guitar going missing in the music room.

“I’ve slept with guys for worse reasons.”

CONTINUED HERE

#Malex #roswell new mexico #malex fic #alex goes undercover #not forrest long friendly #getting back together #Season 3 speculation

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drarrymybeloved · 4 years ago

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for the romance

i’ve been toying with the idea of sharing a few fics i've read for easy access to my faves + author appreciation, and i finally decided to just get off my ass and do it!

this is, in no way, a comprehensive list (it is also very subjective-not a rec list although you're welcome to use it as one!) & i’m sure i’ll be making a part 2 to this at some point in the future. also, these are my interpretations of the fics, so maybe for u it's not the romance that pops out in these & that's okay!

as the title suggests, these are fics i read for the romance <3

1. Turn by Saras_Girl

you knew this would make it onto the list. of course it would. i think we’ve all wondered at some point or the other what would happen if we had done that one thing differently & Saras_Girl explores this concept of actions and their consequences so intricately, i could lose myself in it (and i have. multiple times) the characterisations too are original yet spot on- blaise was such an ebullient surprise! i thought about putting it on my 'for the plot' list too for sheer length + fleshed out plot, but at the end of the day, i come back to this when i want to read a soft familiar romance

2. The Courting by the Pureblood Who Only Has Five Milligrams of Romantic Intelligence and Thinks He’s Real Smooth by @cibeewastaken

read this fairly recently and what a treat!! two idiots pining after each other, a relationship-but-not-really, super earnest draco & a harry that is so completely gone on draco- what more could you want?

3. Little Deaths and How to Avoid Them (or Draco Malfoy’s Guide to Stop Dying and Start Living Instead) by dustmouth, nerakrose

a soft & sweet fic i’ve revisited so many times. featuring harry working in an archive & draco researching death (ways people have died not the actual concept, it’ll make sense i swear) in said archive. i loved the exploration of draco’s anxiety & the way he deals with it & harry understanding his asexuality. also really appreciated the underlying emphasis on communication & consent between partners.

4. The Kisses Don’t Count, If No One Else Knows by oldenuf2b

friends with benefits to fake lovers to actual lovers?? delicious smut streaked through with aching tenderness?? sign me tf up. featuring quidditch player draco, minister for magic harry, under secretary hermione & (scarily competent) head auror ron. this fic gave me everything i could ask for & then some more. 42k has never felt shorter.

5. Right Hand Red by @lqtraintracks

a classic drarry fic, this was one of the first i read and i was immediately enamoured. the slow build up of tension between draco & harry eventually reaching a fever pitch- not quite a slow burn but the effect is the same- keeps you on the edge of your seat, just waiting for the collision you know is coming. the balance of fluff & angst is ideal, with the angst leaving you yearning for the sweet ending more than aching through the angsty bits, if that makes sense.

6. A Song, Incomplete by RurouniHime

this is a fic with layers to it- it features middle aged draco & harry and is essentially placed in present time. it’s left to the reader to pick up on the information given by the author & piece together the backstory of the characters post-war, something i thoroughly enjoyed. the relationship between draco & harry before the events of this fic is hinted at so you know the basic outline of what happened but it’s not so thoroughly fleshed out that there’s no room for subjectivity (again, something i love). the characterisations are so rich, albus especially was so interesting to me, both as a character & the nature of the relationship he shared with his father. the balance between plot and romance is fairly even, but the slow build is just so intense & rife with emotions, it really feels as if the plot is background for draco & harry’s relationship. this is an achingly sweet fic as opposed to a feel-good fic, but definitely one i've revisited many times.

7. Good to Me (And I’d Be So Good To You) by AWickedMemory (TeddyLaCroix)

such a sweet 8th year fic with harry determined to make friends with a subdued draco & then falling for him along the way. i love how well both boys know each others tells & draco’s reluctant acceptance of harry’s attempts at friendship is so endearing. special mention to an apparently oblivious hermione who was (in true hermione fashion) not oblivious for a second & was in fact the reason harry confessed his feelings for draco. definitely a fic that’ll make you smile!

8. if you've changed your mind by warmfoothills

mamma mia au!! need i say more? though i suppose it's not so much an au as it is draco just going full donna-from-mamma-mia post-war. complete with an island, a son, and an embarrassing diary found by said son.

9. Way Down We Go by @xiaq

(this is going to go on my 'for the plot' fic list too because Reasons) this has all of my favourite tropes oh my god. i love xiaq's take on werewolf!harry; it's so refreshing to see were!harry that isn't like, a big dramatic thing. less beast of the night, more cuddly silly large dog. on that note, draco figuring out that harry is a werewolf in like, 1 second, is so spot on lmaoo. the slow burn is so good (so much domesticity!! so! much! also hurt/comfort). it has a dash of angst which is balanced out so well by the fluff. i've read it recently so i'm waiting for it to settle into my memory a bit (do y'all do that? is it just me??) but this is definitely a fic to revisit.

#drarry #fic lists #is that a thing?#now it is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#for the romance #part 1/?#no one asked for this but it's here anyway #<3

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umisabaku · 3 years ago

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Hi! I'm a huge fan as of a week ago when I discovered designation miracle and speedread through all of it. I really love your writing so much, so I had to ask: please please write a reki/langa piece? It can be AU/scifi/fantasy anything you like, and doesn't have to be long but I would so love to see your fic/minific! also, i saw that you had posted about tying the kuroko fantasy AU together -- have you thought of looking at 1001 nights instead of grimms, they have a lot of nested stories

It doesn't take him long to figure out that 1) he died and 2) apparently reincarnated in the body of Kyan Reki, minor trash character in Ice Infinity, long-running web novel series he used to read because his younger sister made him. Which, holy shit, he did not think that actually happened, and apparently he should have paid more attention to transmigration web novels instead of skating. (Nope, that wouldn't have happened. He loved skating. Still loves skating. This is clearly his little sister's fault, for being fond of dark fantasy harem novels instead of transmigration novels.)

He tugs his floofy red hair and thinks that this isn't the worst possible novel to wake up in, but it's pretty bad. At least he's familiar with the story line. Protagonist Hasegawa Langa, aka Prince of Ice and Snow, was cursed as a baby (although he doesn't know it) to have a frozen heart. He competes in a (very long, drawn-out) magic tournament, and becomes super awesome magic ruler of all time, but each battle brings out a darker side of him, and the more evil he gets, the more the world begins to ice over. This is, in part, due to the manipulations of Demon Lord Adam, who wants Langa's powers for himself. Meanwhile, various women try to "unfreeze the prince's heart" or whatever, with the implication that if someone managed to melt his broken heart, the world wouldn't be destroyed by ice.

(Reki gave his sister so much shit for liking this story. It was still ongoing, and the world was almost destroyed by ice. There'd been, like, fifty different women who were potential love interests throughout this saga, and the Prince still had a frozen heart. Also, he was pretty evil at that point. Reki's not sure what the appeal is, although now that he's in the book, he's at least grateful that he knows what's coming.)

The problem is, Kyan Reki dies in the first chapter. Killed by Langa, in fact, which Reki (now that he is Reki) does not appreciate. Reki was a brash, arrogant jerk, with low level fire magic. He was Langa's first opponent in the tournament, and had insulted the memory of Langa's dead father, which is what provoked the killing. Langa hadn't meant to kill Reki, but the accidental murder is what started the long path towards evil, frozen heart, and the end of the world.

So now that Reki knows what's coming he thinks, Well, I'll just not do that then.

Seems simple enough. He comes up with a Plan of Survival: He won't compete in the magic tournament, he'll stay away from the Ice Prince, and maybe move to a tropical island or something. He doesn't like the idea of the world freezing over, but that seems like a problem far in the future. And hey, this world doesn't have skateboards, but it has all the materials he needs to make skateboards, which means it's not so bad, as fantasy worlds go. Fire magic is pretty cool too.

Step one: withdraw from tournament. Easily done! Everyone looks surprised when he announces his withdrawal. Shadow says, "What are you talking about?? We're supposed to have our grudge match! Weren't you telling everyone that you were going to kick their asses?"

Wow, that's embarrassing. Reki wishes he woke up earlier in the book, before his character made stupid brags. "Nope, I'm good. Have fun, though!"

Step two: Stay away from the Ice Prince. This also seems like it should be fairly easy, since Reki isn't going to the magic tournament.

Except the very next day he practically runs into Langa on his newly made skateboard.

"AH! Ice Prince!" Reki says from the ground.

"What?" Langa says.

Oh right, no one calls him that yet.

"That's, uh, the name of my skateboard," Reki says. He gets up and dusts his pants, and then moves to retrieve his board. He spins one of the wheels and then, mostly to himself, he says, "I think I need to adjust the balance."

"Your what?" Langa says, looking over Reki's shoulder.

Reki tenses, feeling very close to death right now. Don't insult his dead father. Don't insult his dead father. "My skateboard," he says. "For skating." And then, because he can't help himself, he brags, "I made it."

"You did?" Langa says. His voice doesn't reveal a lot of emotion (frozen heart, and all) but he sounds impressed. "Is that what you were doing earlier? With the loops?"

"Oh, you saw that?" Reki says, embarrassed.

"Do you have wind magic?"

"Nope, just fire," Reki says. Then, remembering their fight to the death, hastily adds, "Low level fire magic. Very low fire. Practically nonexistent, really."

"And you still flew in the air like that?" Langa says.

"Because of the skateboard!" Reki balances on the board and circles around Langa so he can get a good look.

"Is it for transportation?"

"It's for a lot of things! But mostly, it's for fun!" If he accomplishes nothing else but introduce skateboarding into this fantasy world, Reki feels like he'll have made an important legacy. Then, because Langa still looks intrigued, Reki says, "Do you want to try?"

"Can I?" Langa says, sounding surprised by the invite.

"Sure! Anyone can skate." Reki hops off the board and shows Langa how to get on, all the while revisiting his Plan for Survival.

He doesn't really want the world to freeze over. And that Adam guy is a dick. Langa probably wouldn't have killed so many people if Adam hadn't been manipulating things in the background. Maybe... maybe Reki should stick around Langa, show him how to have fun, introduce him to some nice girls, and keep him from turning evil and destroying the world.

He completely misses the marveling look Langa is giving him, like he's just seen something wonderful.

A/N: Thank you, anon-friend! I'm glad you enjoy my stories. I've been wanting to write something for SK8 but wasn't sure what kind of AU I should do. Since I've been reading and watching a lot of Isekai lately, and I've never written that as an AU before, I thought this would be fun! Hope you enjoyed! (also, I kinda want to stick with Grimm, but would consider branching out for other fairy tale stories!)

#Mikki writes #sk8 the inifinity #lanreki #tumblr fic #fic I wrote #isekai au #I have asks! and I'm answering them!#this is my anon tag #long post

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anika-ann · 4 years ago

Text

The 5 Times Steve Felt Betrayed - Pt.3

and the 1 Time He Felt Like He Was Betraying You

Type: mini-series to a series (part 1 & part 2 & Part 3), Avenger!reader AU.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader, Matt Murdock & reader

Word count: 2750

Summary: The airport battle comes to pass. Steve is not impressed. However, his major facepalm is coming in 3, 2, 1...

Warnings: violence, language, angst, physical pain, mention of human experimentation

A/N: This part of Melting Hearts’ verse follows the events of CA: Civil War, sometimes only referencing them and kinda expecting the readers to know what’s up ;)

Posted in double chapters (1st &2nd time, 3th & 4th, 5th+1)

Previous part

────── ·❆· ──────

5. (Turning Tables)

When Tony showed up at the airport, just according to their plan… you were side by side with him.

Steve felt sorry for not burning the letter when he had changed into the uniform. He had promised himself that he would definitely read it when having the time, so he had secured it into a zip-zap bag and hid in the pocket of his pants instead. Now he knew that every word you must have written into the letter was poison and his right leg felt a ton heavier than his left one.

Steve knew that for the most part, it was the feeling of betrayal talking – but he was revisiting every single interaction with you, all of your words replaying in his head, and wondered, where he had gone wrong. What he had missed. How could he not see you as you truly were? A traitor. A liar. A coward, because while you were standing right next to Natasha, you weren’t even able to meet Steve’s eyes – unlike the spy.

He desperately wanted to meet your eyes. To look deeply into your soul and see if you were ashamed at least. For leading him on for so long.

The truth was, you were; ashamed, horrified and a little bit proud. But Steve didn’t seem to know that – which meant he either was as good as you were, or he hadn’t even touched the letter, which was pretty understandable actually.

“You’re gonna turn and come with us. Because it’s us! Don’t you see what you had done?! You tore the team apart – you even drove the woman who had ridiculous amount of trust in you, who loved you for god’s sake, away from you!” Tony yelled at him, apparently losing his nerves.

It made Steve’s blood boil.

“You don’t talk about my relationship with her like this! You have no business in that!”

“Yeah, and what about her? Does she have any business in that? She apparently has more reason than you do! Try to use your brain for a goddamn second, Rogers!”

“Tony…” Natasha whispered warningly.

It was the exact moment Sam’s voice sounded in Steve’s ear, informing him about the quinjet in hangar five; their plan of escape.

Despite the bitterness of this reunion, he couldn’t help but feel a bit of hope and satisfaction. He raised his tied hands above his head and a second later, Clint’s precisely aimed arrow freed him of the strange organic cuffs that dangerously reminded him of an actual cobweb.

It was time to punch their way out of this one, only to do a lot more punching later if they succeeded.

────── ·❆· ──────

Steve was really busy trying to keep T’Challa from Bucky, too much to keep an eye on you. But when he had a second, he sought you on the battlefield subconsciously, checking if you were alright. He didn’t even have the energy to feel like a hypocrite with his own action, with the annoying habit.

He only found you staying out of the fight, keeping a careful eye on each of the individual combats – but never interfering.

His stomach rolled over, his vision blurring for a moment as his head spun. You were standing aside, watching your friends and him getting beat up. Like a coward.

What else were you? A back-up for if Tony and his friends would be losing? The ace in their sleeves?

Steve felt the bile rising up his throat at the thought. How had that happened? When?

It was only when Vision appeared that you looked up, all of your attention focused on the android who had entered the fight and literally drew a line between the two teams.

You joined the line created by Tony, Rhodey, Natasha, Vision, T’Challa and Spider-kid, standing against Steve’s team. Seven versus six – Steve was outnumbered.

And that was on you.

For the first time since you had encountered him at the airport, you met his eyes for a split second. Steve was shocked when he found the windows to your soul, usually so sincerely open, perfectly locked, your expression unreadable. He couldn’t bear it and looked away as he eyed his team and started jogging towards his former teammates and friends. And fiancée.

The opposite side broke into a run too.

And then you abruptly stopped, your hand hitting the ground hard, creating a thick layer of ice under your supposed teammates’ feet, knocking three of them off balance. And the remaining three who had managed to get in the air – Vision, Rhodey and Tony – were soon busy avoiding icicles shot from your hands.

Steve froze and it had nothing to do with your powers.

Wanda seemed unfazed by your action, throwing herself into a fight; the ice seemed to be conveniently melting under her feet as if she was the one controlling it. Which was impossible. It must have been all you. Which… what?

“Alright, does that mean Miss Iceberg over there is on our side now?” Scott yelled after everyone and it snapped Steve from his trance.

Well, it looked like it now. Steve didn’t spend much time pondering about it and rather went after Tony, who was getting dangerously close to him.

“She always has been!” Wanda cried out in response, sending Vision crashing into a plane.

“SHE WHAT?!” Steve shouted over the roar of the fight, punching Tony’s metal-covered face. The mechanical voice had asked the same question and seemed stunned – it bought Steve enough time to shoot you a look.

Oh, you were definitely fighting on their side with the way you trapped Spiderman’s hands in an impressive column of ice growing from the ground. It reminded Steve of their own arrest and confused the hell out of him.

Wanda threw away T’Challa who had come down on Bucky with a battle cry. “The letter! I was trying to tell you!”

It felt like a punch to Steve’s gut and only a second later, an actual punch followed.

Really? Was that what was written there? That you were on their side? What, the whole time? But that was impossible! You had sabotaged their escape, you had held back at every other occasion, you hadn’t come with Wanda! You had signed!

…but had you? Had you really signed, or had you just been stalling? Didn’t the fact you hadn’t arrived with Wanda give you the advantage of knowing Tony’s plan, learning any possible aces in his sleeves? Had there been a reason why you had helped the agency to get Steve and Bucky too? What kind of game had you been playing?

Steve quickly shook off the confusing thoughts. You would have to be playing Tony and everyone from the beginning. Or maybe you had changed your mind during the process?

An iron fist hitting his jaw brought him back to reality very quickly and he decided the reasons you had weren’t important – not now.

But before he could block another punch, Iron Man was gushed away by what looked like a cubic meter iceberg. Steve only gasped, his head snapping to the source. You gave him a quick smile and nodded.

“You need to go. I’ll help with holding them off.”

“But-“

“Go, Steve!” you cried out, your voice urgent, your sincere eyes glaring into his.

He saw it now. He saw you. His heart skipped a beat with the realization; you truly were fighting for them. For him. But how?

“You owe me an explain-“

“That can wait! Just go!”

“Then come with me!” he blurted out hastily, which only made you shook your head.

“Here, I can buy you some time! Go!”

“Goddammit, Snowflake, I’m not leaving you! They— I don’t know what they’ll do to you!”

“Duh, what else is new. Just move your ass, Captain!” you yelled and tiny icicles came at him from his left. He shook them off, only to realize they were fragments of the cobweb, frozen and useless thanks to your quick reaction – you had just prevented a whole new set of sticky trouble coming at him.

It made him sick all over again, because he just didn’t know what was happening, what had been happening. He shot a you a desperate glance.

“GET OUT OF HERE!”

He set his jaw tight, his feet as if frozen and itching to run at the same time. Before he could make up his goddamn mind, a wall of ice appeared, shielding him from you and his assailant.

You had decided for him. And as much as he hated it, as much as he felt like a complete ass, he had to admit you were right. He had to go.

And so he did.

The quinjet was already in the air when you fell to the ground with an agonized scream as the sharpest pain you had ever felt attacked the base of your spine and paralyzed you for several moments. You blacked out only seconds after you found a way to move your fingers; the last thing you saw was Natasha’s worried and pissed off face.

────── ·❆· ──────

+1 (The Reversal)

The hum of the quinjet was so low no ordinary man would hear it; but now, it was two supersoldiers in it, Steve piloting, Bucky sitting beside him, and at least one of them found the white noise comforting. It muffled Steve’s loud thoughts a little. But sound could never prevent his emotions from coming at him and since he didn’t have to fight at the moment, he was failing at pushing them away.

"What’s gonna happen to your friends?" Bucky’s low tenor cut the silence like a knife, directing Steve’s thoughts exactly the where he didn’t want them to go.

His eyes absently traced the sky, his mind getting all too loud. For a moment, he didn’t even know what to say. He didn’t know the answer and he wasn’t sure he wanted to. And it wasn’t just his friends he was worried about. Even your fate was in the hands of people who didn’t really care; those who might still care must have been furious with you and their hands were tied by the stupid document that had divided the team in half anyway.

Steve had no idea what the future held; the only certainty he had was that whatever would happen, it wouldn’t be pretty.

"Whatever it is, I'll deal with it," he replied instead, trying so damn hard to keep his voice even.

"I don't know if I'm worth all this, Steve.”

As if something truly broke in Steve, he cracked a sorrowful smile. Worth. Worth fighting for. Worth saving. Worth a chance at redemption. Steve couldn’t help but wonder if it was just him being a magnet for people with self-worth issues of if it came with the job description.

"What you did all those years… it wasn't you. You didn’t have a choice."

"I know. But I still did it."

The sentence was hanging in the air for a long time, too truthful to be disproved. Steve knew all too well he couldn’t change the past – but what he could always do was to fight for a better tomorrow.

"Even so, you still deserve a chance to redeem yourself."

"At what cost?” Bucky asked, his voice heavy with regrets. The knot in Steve’s stomach tightened. “This gal of yours-"

"Bucky, don't-" Steve pleaded silently, tears pricking in his eyes at the mention of you.

"-she seems... nice. I honestly have no idea whose side she was on, but she saved our asses there, kicking everyone else's.”

"I... I don't know either,” Steve admitted honestly, sighing.

What he did know for sure was that leaving you there was wrong. It felt like betraying the trust you had put into him; no matter the fact you had been the one who had told him to get out of there.

“She's good. Pretty. Badass fighter. I sense a pattern," Bucky brought up with a hint of a joke. The corners of Steve’s lips barely twitched.

"It wasn't like that when we first met."

"What do you mean?"

"Her... being like this."

Steve didn’t know what had possessed him to give in – perhaps it was the kind of talk he missed, mixed with Bucky keeping him company. With Bucky, who cared for him, who was curious about what he had missed from Steve’s life.

"What was it like then?"

"She was… alone. Scared of what her powers did. She gave me a frostbite the first time we met – without intending to. She was wallowing in guilt, because she hurt people, not knowing how it happened. Terrified she would hurt more. How's that for a pattern?"

Steve was confident Bucky had noticed the obvious nudge at their resemblance, but he didn’t take the bait. His friend lived to surprise; he snorted silently.

"You have the weirdest taste."

It brought an honest smile to Steve’s face, a warm feeling he wouldn’t expect filling his chest. Bucky continued though.

"You called her something, when we were fighting. It was cute. It was... what was it?"

Steve cleared his throat awkwardly. Bucky was cool and all, but the he would never let Steve live down the nickname he had given you.

"The whole team— what used to be a team, they all have a nickname for her.... Thor, you haven't met him, he calls her Lady of Ice."

"Oh wow."

"The public... they call her Frostbite. She doesn't like it much. Stark-“ and the name tasted way too bitter on Steve’s tongue, “-calls her Elsa – it's from some new fairy tale."

"Cute. Speaking of fairy tales, anyone calls her Snow Queen?"

"No. But... uhm… a friend calls her Gerda."

"A friend, huh?" Bucky emphasized knowingly, making Steve actually blush a little. There was no way Steve could ever supress the feeling of jealousy towards the man in the Devil costume or the lawyer he was disguising as in the daylight.

"They went on a date. Right before... before we got together."

And for some reason, she had sought him out after the mission in Nigeria.

"No way,” Bucky laughed excitedly, his mood shooting up towards the stars. Steve couldn’t hold back his own smile at the happy sound. “Did you have to like... fight him to win her favour or something?"

"No. She... she picked me, without a fight."

"Ah, I can feel your ego boosting."

"Yeah, well. She… she chose me and...”

Steve thought of what Bucky said before and what he said to him – about a pattern. He thought about him almost dying when he had been injected with the anti-serum and you had almost dying, pushing yourself to your very limit to save him. About you saying no to Matt. About you pulling Steve behind you when he had laid down his shield, which had left him somewhat unprotected. About you deciding to stay with the Avengers instead of disappearing off the grid with your parents. About you running away in attempt to keep the danger from him. And now about risking everything – including his trust – when turning against Tony while standing by his side.

You had always chosen him. And this was how he was repaying you. With leaving you behind.

“And I guess she always has,” Steve stated softly, his expression missing the flicker of happiness he felt just a minute ago; the dark thoughts swallowed it all. “Worked for her well."

"What happened to dealing with what's to come?"

Steve sighed, gripping the stalk tighter. There was a lot to come and he had in fact no clue how to deal with it.

"I'm glad you have someone like her, Steve," Bucky announced, patting Steve’s shoulder brotherly.

If I still have her, Steve thought bitterly. Even if he was about to get you out of the lurch he had left you in… there was no guarantee you would forgive him his ignorance.

He didn’t say any of that out loud though.

"Yeah. Yeah, me too. It's just..." he said instead, his voice trailing off rather than finishing the sentence.

"You will deal with what's to come. You're too stubborn to give up, punk."

That he was.

"I'm not giving up on you either, Buck."

"Thanks, Steve… but that was cheesy as hell."

Steve couldn’t but chuckle. It was good to have his friend back. He just wished the circumstances were way different. If nothing else, he wished the attempt to save Bucky and take care of the potential Winter Soldiered men didn’t come with the price of leaving you behind. Leaving you with the mess he had caused and betraying you – just like he had thought you had been doing for the past few weeks.

The universe had a very twisted sense of humour. But it was something Steve would have to deal with later.

────── ·❆· ──────

Bonus chapter

────── ·❆· ──────

That would be it – six chapters are kinda the point of 5+1 stuff.

BUT there’s a bonus coming, for much needed closure. Pretty much a cheesy one too, set after the rescue one-man mission from at The Raft. Because me and my brain apparently don’t understand the concept of a 5+1 work. Also, it offers a bit of Reader’s insight, so… hopefully it’s not such a capital crime.

Worse things have happened, right? You can always just cut it here ;) (please don’t, I mean, if you have made it this far… :D )

Also, Snowflake’s hurt at the airport was caused by the fail-safe she was installed with in Hands Too Cold, in case you forgot :-*

#fanfiction #steve rogers x reader #avenger reader #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers x you #captain america x reader #captain america imagine #captain america x you #ca:cw #steve rogers #captain america #steve rogers fanfiction #captain america fanfiction #5 times steve felt betrayed #melting hearts #anika ann

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myaekingheart · 3 years ago

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20 [Fanfic Writer] Questions Game

Thank you so much for tagging me, @lemony-snickers! This is tons of fun, I love answering these kinds of big questionnaires 😂💕 Also putting mine under a cut because there’s a lot of questions and I like to ramble.

Also gonna go ahead and just tag whoever wants to do this! 😅💕

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

As of August 27, 2021, I have a total of 77 works on my AO3!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

Funny enough, I was just looking at this, specifically, earlier today and kind of laughing about it. Right now, my total word count across all my works is 1,148,941 😬

3. How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

Apparently 12, but some of them I don’t really consider “big” in my fandom repertoire. Naruto is my greatest fandom with a total of 60 fics so far, followed by The Chronicles of Narnia and Rise of the Guardians. The rest are ones I either did crossover fics with or just did one-off little pieces with--The Incredibles, Tangled, Brave, How to Train Your Dragon, Arthurian Mythology, Disney Princesses, Fairy Tales and Related Fandoms, Back to the Future, and Frozen.

4. What are your Top Five fics by kudos?

The Scarecrow and The Bell (Naruto) - 470 kudos The Day Kakashi’s Mask Slipped (Naruto) - 139 kudos Sunflowers (Naruto) - 92 kudos Sakumo the House Husband (Naruto) - 81 kudos Someone to Lean On (Naruto) - 67 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I always try to respond to comments, because I like to acknowledge when people respond to my work. I cherish comments like nobody’s business, especially when they’re kind and reactionary. I just really love seeing/hearing what people think of the way a story is progressing, or what they thought of a one-shot. Comments keep me going especially when it comes to longfic so I want to be able to let readers know that I do in fact see their comments, that I’m acknowledging what they’re saying, and that I appreciate them. Plus, it can be kind of fun to tease upcoming events in a fic through responses to people’s comments, too. Because I’m mean.

6. What fic have you written with the angstiest ending?

Definitely Hothouse (Rise of the Guardians/The Incredibles; Jack Frost x Violet Parr; American Horror Story AU). This was the first multi-chaptered fic I ever wrote to completion and I honestly cringe when I remember it exists both because it’s so poorly organized (and full of nasty plot holes) and because I just went ham on the gore factor. It definitely has a really bittersweet and heartbreaking ending to it, too.

7. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

I think I’ll definitely have to say Temptation. The story itself was kind of a ride, and it’s only the first installment in a series, but it follows the plot of The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe but remixed due to the presence of an original character, but the ending is still roughly the same as the original: they defeat the evil, the Pevensies are all crowned kings and queens, happy days. Reading the last few paragraphs of the last chapter honestly still gets me all up in my feelings.

8. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I used to be more of a crossover writer due to one of my main ships being a crossover ship. They weren’t super crazy, though, because they were both CGI-animated films. The craziest crossover I’ve ever written is an in-progress/unfinished multichapter piece, Kakashi, Enchanted, that sees our favorite Copy Ninja get kamui’d into the Disney princess dimension and has to help the likes of Snow White, Cinderella, and Rapunzel on his journey to find a way back to his own world. It’s a super weird premise but definitely one of my more lighthearted works and fun to revisit when I need to decompress.

9. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

I don’t think I’ve ever received hate so much as I’ve received criticism. The closest I ever got to hate on a fic, I think, was someone left an overly personal and mentally disturbed comment on a chapter of my main fic that made me convinced they needed to seek therapy and deal with their own personal issues rather than take it out on a fanfic about animated ninjas.

10. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Maybe 👀 I’m super vanilla when it comes to smut, though. I think the wildest thing I’ve ever written in smut is breeding kink.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of, and I hope I never will.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not yet! I had someone ask to translate a one-shot of mine in Russian but I never got a response back when I laid out my terms and conditions.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not! I used to do paragraph-style roleplay which was kind of like cowriting fanfiction but writing is so personal and sacred to me that I don’t know if I could ever actually cowrite a fic with someone. I like brainstorming with other people, but writing for me is more of a deeply personal and independent endeavour.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Oh god, this is a tricky question because it depends on fandom. I absolutely love New Dream (Rapunzel x Eugene, Tangled) and have for the past ten years, and my love for them as only grown since watching Tangled: The Series/Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventure. I don’t write or even really read a ton of fanfiction for them, though. I’m also still highly dedicated to my favorite crossover crackship, Frostfield (Jack Frost x Violet Parr, Rise of the Guardians/The Incredibles) and to this day, if you search for that ship on AO3, I am the sole provider of every single fic about them so far. I’m not as active with them as I used to be, but they got me through some really rough times back in the day and still mean so much to me. A lot of my favorite ships across fandoms, though, are honestly canon x OC ships of mine because I am a self-indulgent bitch who needs to project. So Peter Pevensie x Eilonwy (The Chronicles of Narnia) and Kakashi Hatake x Rei Natsuki (Naruto) are really important to me and I’ve poured so much of myself specifically into their stories. I think it’s safe to say Kakashi and Rei is my all-time favorite ship across all fandoms, though, just because of how much their story means to me. The Scarecrow and The Bell is my magnum opus, my pride and joy, and I’m sure it will be my biggest fandom footprint of my entire life. I’ve dedicated the past three years to this story and these characters and I intend to continue doing it until it no longer brings me joy (which I hope it always will). There’s just so much I could say about this story and Kakashi and Rei’s relationship but I don’t think we have enough time or space in this post for that 😅 Just know that they mean the world to me and I will always hold them in the highest regard as a beautifully messy, flawed, passionate, soulmate-y ship that I love with all of my heart 🥺

EDIT: I also feel obligated to tack on some of my absolute favorite Naruto ships because I may not have written for all of them (yet) but they still make me unbelievably happy or I find them really compelling and enjoy the idea of exploring them:

Naruhina is precious happy sunshine and The Last honestly felt like a wonderful Disney princess movie to me, it was so cute and the romance was so on-point, Naruhina just makes me so incredibly happy and I love them with all my heart.

MinaKushi also gets me all up in my feels and I adore them with every fiber of my being. Their romance also gave me Disney princess movie vibes which I love, their story is just so damn sweet as is their character dynamic and I am still so heartbroken that they never got to be a happy family with Naruto because you know what? It’s what they deserved!

SasuSaku is so compelling to me and I really feel like we were cheated out of seeing their relationship develop and evolve postwar in the same way The Last did for Naruhina. They’re my favorite angst ship and while I don’t think they were written that well in canon, I love the possibility and potential of them together and am excited to explore them more in-depth in my own writing.

NejiTen is just too cute, I really love the way Neji and Tenten’s personalities compliment each other? I don’t have much else to say about them except that I really love them together and think they have so much untapped potential that I also can’t wait to explore in more depth in my own writing.

15. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Paper Hearts and Impromptu Bookmarks, probably. I love the premise of this story a lot and I have so many interesting ideas for it but at the same time, it also feels kind of cheap and cringey to me, in a way? It takes all of these ideas I probably would have had if I had been into Naruto when I was a kid and kind of compiles them all into one big story. Kakashi and Aiko’s relationship and story is still really important to me and I want to continue it someday but for right now, I just haven’t had the motivation or desire to write any more of it. I think I’m just so overwhelmingly preoccupied with writing Kakashi and Rei’s story that I can’t imagine writing any other Kakashi x OC fics right now.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I want to say that I’m really good at capturing complex emotion? I don’t know, I write a lot of angst and mental upheaval in my fics which can be really difficult to try and capture, but I think I do a decent enough job of it? And just writing difficult subjects in general. I think it’s really important to address difficult topics such as mental illness and relationship difficulties and everything but I also want to try and write those topics in a way that is both authentic to the experience while also still tasteful. I don’t want to drive readers away with heavy subject matter but rather present a situation that feels real and authentic while also still being digestible. I may not be doing a very good job of that during the current arc of my fic that I’m working on, but I’m trying haha

EDIT 2: I also want to add onto this to say that I’m really proud of my organizational techniques for writing longfic. It’s not necessarily a strength in terms of the prose itself but it’s something that’s taken me years to really get a grasp on and find a method that works perfectly for me and so far, it’s been extremely helpful and beneficial to me. I don’t know where I would be now as a writer without these essential tools in my pocket.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I feel like I do a really bad job of the “show, don’t tell” thing. It can be really hard to balance descriptive prose with straightforward writing that moves things along. I don’t want to dwell on mental dialogue to the point where you lose track of what’s going on, but I also don’t want my stuff to read like “Character A did xyz. Character B said abc. They went to 123″, whatever. Another thing I struggle with is sentence variation. I always fall into the same patterns when I’m writing prose and I get really self-conscious about it because I don’t want to sound repetitive or disrupt the flow of the writing. One of my favorite things about prose is focusing on the cadence of the words, I think it’s one of the most beautiful things about writing in general, but it can just be really difficult to get a good grip on that. I’ve been told in the past that I apparently have a really good grasp/control of the language or whatever but sometimes I just find that really hard to believe when I look at my work with such scrutiny. I think one of my biggest pet peeves with my own writing, too, is feeling like I start all of my sentences the same five different ways. I’ll read other people’s works and they’ll write sentences like “Glass-blue water lapped against the shores of a deserted beach as a lonely woman gazed off into the distance” and I can just never figure out how to realistically write sentences that start like that in the context of my prose and it drives me fucking crazy, like I’m definitely jealous 😅

18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I’ve never really thought much about it before, but I think there are pros and cons! For bilingual/multilingual readers, I think it can be a really enriching reading experience because they know what’s being said in both languages. For people who only know one language, however, unless a translation is provided, I feel like it can be really alienating. I think the best use of that for both worlds is using it as a means for miscommunication humor. Other than that, I think it can be a slippery slope that depends on what kind of reader you are and how it’s written.

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

The Chronicles of Narnia! My very first fanfiction was a Narnia fanfic that I barely remember except that it laid the basis for Temptation and my Narnia fanfic series as a whole. I never posted this first iteration anyway, but I remember it was 2008/2009 and I wrote a solid 80 pages (which was wild for me at the time) and had gotten halfway through remixing the events of Prince Caspian when my computer crashed and I lost absolutely everything. I’m still heartbroken that it’s gone forever, not because I’d want to go back and read it necessarily (since I’m sure it was actually hot garbage) but at least for nostalgia’s sake. Either way, like I said, this long-lost fic laid the basis for the very first fanfiction I ever posted, the first published (and never finished) iteration of Temptation back in 2011 on deviantART and the since-defunct Figment. I fell out of the fandom around 2012/2013 and left the story alone for a while before ultimately deciding to completely redux and rewrite the story when the fixation swung back around again between 2016 and 2018.

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Despite the fact that it’s still in-progress, definitely The Scarecrow and The Bell. This fic just genuinely means so damn much to me and I will cherish it for the rest of my life because of how much it’s given me, how much love and passion and time and even parts of myself that I have poured into this, and also just how expansive of a story this is. Not only does it touch on some very dark and heavy topics, but I’ve also created so much of my own characters and meta for this story that it’s almost an entire universe in and of itself. I’ve just contributed so much additional world-building and created so many new OCs to fill important roles in this story and in Rei’s life, and they’ve all become so deeply important to me as they’ve developed further over the years. I’ve come up with so many interesting ideas for everyone and their lives, which are all slowly becoming so rich and varied. Not to mention that it’s my most popular fic to date as well as my longest fic at 632k and counting. I’ve really just genuinely poured so much of my heart and soul into this story, it’s my absolute favorite thing I’ve ever done and I really mean it when I say that I will cherish it for the rest of my life.

#tag games #ramblings

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gukyi · 5 years ago

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ice prince (post-script) | jjk

summary: you travel the world together as the country’s favorite ice dancing couple and celebrity romance, but you can’t help but wonder what the future has in store for you and jungkook.

{established relationship!au, ice skating!au}

pairing: jeon jungkook x female reader genre: fluff word count: 1k warnings: none a/n: thank you to @sopseokjin for commissioning this piece and donating to the #blacklivesmatter movement!! i had so much fun revisiting the ice prince couple. if you remember me writing the entire 22k fic in 4 days, you qualify for a veterans’ discount.

There is something different about hotel windows.

They’re always enormous, always spanning the size of the wall, a big Plexiglass screen separating you from the world outside. They always come with two curtains, a semi-transparent one that lets you see into other people’s rooms, and a thick one with the pattern of an old wallpaper or vintage couch.

And they always make you feel as though you’re both looking out into a sea of lights, into a city slowly beginning to fall asleep, and as if you were trapped inside, the window being your only source of contact.

It’s no wonder you always find yourself staring out of it, wrapped in a white robe after hopping out of the shower, a long day of competing and skating behind you. Normally, you’d soak your feet in the bathtub as well, letting the water wash away of the soreness, but you feel quite light tonight.

You gaze out into the city, looking over the roofs of buildings, over the air vents and grey cement that covers all of the skyscrapers that surround you. The yellow glows in the top-floor windows of the buildings are your stars tonight, lighting up an otherwise empty navy blue sky. It’s such a shame that there isn’t a cloud in the sky, and yet you cannot see a single star. Your window doesn’t even face the moon.

“A penny for your thoughts?”

You look up to see Jungkook standing behind you in the reflection of the glass, soft brown hair tousled and messy, like he just got out of the shower and let it dry as is. He’s wearing an old shirt from your home rink and some shorts. Comfort clothes.

“Just looking out the window,” you tell him, letting him come over and watching your reflection as he wraps his arms around you, swaying softly.

“It’s pretty,” Jungkook meets your eyes in the window.

“Is it weird that, no matter what city we go to, I always feel the same when I look out the window?”

Jungkook pauses for a moment, then says, “No. I feel it, too.”

Does he?

Does he feel the way that even if the world changes you feel as though your place in it has remained stagnant? Feel like you’re trapped repeating the same few days over and over and over again? Ice skating is perhaps one of your truest passions in life, something that you seldom dread doing despite all of the injuries over the years. But it is as though you do not exist without your skates. That your sense of belonging is defined by being on the rink rather than off of it.

You wouldn’t know who you are without ice skating. It’s brought you so much joy, so much love. It carried you to Jungkook.

“I shouldn’t be complaining.” you say with a shake of your head, pulling yourself out of his grasp and settling down on the side of the bed. The sheets are tucked into the bed frame so tightly you’re half convinced that they might rip if you pull them any further. “We get to go to so many nice places and stay in fancy hotel rooms and skate for a living.”

“That doesn’t mean you can’t find negatives in what we do,” Jungkook says with his eyebrows turned down as he joins you on the bed. “You can be grateful and critical of things at the same time.”

“I just feel like…” you sigh, unable to find the right words. You aren’t by any means discontented with your life, with what you get to do. Every morning you wake up and look forward to what the day has to offer, look forward to tugging on your skates and getting onto the ice, look forward to seeing Namjoon and Hoseok and Taehyung and, especially Jungkook. “Like we’ll be stuck doing this forever.”

“You know that’s not true,” Jungkook tells you, reaching out to take your hand in his own. He strokes the back of it with his thumb, calloused fingers pressing against your skin. “We can dp whatever we want with our lives.”

“I don’t really know what I want,” you admit. You’ve always been rather indecisive. It is one of your greatest flaws.

“You don’t have to know,” Jungkook assures you. He has always been so driven, so focused. He looks to the future fondly, rather than in fear. His heart guides him through each and every day, and even if he makes a mistake he knows it will never steer him in the wrong direction. “You just have to see where life takes you.”

You turn to him, watch his eyes grow bigger as they stare into yours. “Where do you want life to take you? When this is all over, what do you want to do?” When younger skaters far more talented than you will usurp you, will achieve far more complex jumps and challenging lifts, effectively sending you on a slow decline out of the top leagues. When the spotlight will no longer shine on you, lighting up your path on the ice, when no more medals will hang around your neck and no more trophies will be placed into your hands.

“I’m not sure,” Jungkook says. “I’ve always wanted to learn piano.”

“You can do that now,” you remind him.

“Not with our schedules, I can’t,” he says.

“There’s a piano in the lobby,” you remember. It’s an upright, nothing too fancy, but no staff seems to play it and barely anybody spares it a second glance. “You can try.”

“Maybe some other time,” Jungkook says with a laugh, letting you rest your head on his shoulder. You’re still facing the window, but it’s different when you’re sitting down, further away from it. Like you’re watching a late-night movie. Like you’re not a part of the scene at all. “I’d also coach, maybe. Like Namjoon and Hoseok, I think that’d be fun.”

Ice skating will never leave him.

“You think we’ll still be together after all of this?” You ask. It’s a weird, hopeful sort of ask. Like you hope he says yes even if the odds are against it. There’s a part of you that fears, that has always feared, that ice skating was your only link, the only thing keeping you connected. You would not have known Jungkook without skating, and you know him now as someone who is just like you. But what will happen when all of that ends?

You feel the way Jungkook sits up straighter, feel how he stiffens, making you look up at him. It’s an honest, candid question. What does the future hold for the two of you? Is there even one to begin with?

“What do you mean?” He asks. “Of course I do.” A pause. “Do you… not?”

“No!” You tell him. There is nothing you fear more than being away from him, than losing the last part of your life that preserves what little personality you have left. “I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I just—I wasn’t sure.”

Jungkook reaches his other arm out, both of your hands wrapped up in his own, and he squeezes tightly, making you look at him. He’s got that steely, certain look to him, the same determination you see right before a competition performance.

“I don’t know what goes on in that head of yours,” he begins, “but you have nothing to worry about. Not about ice skating, or competitions, or our future, or me. Because I love you, and I’m proud of you, and I know that whatever you end up doing will be beautiful and meaningful to all of the people whose lives you have touched. And I will always stand by your side, even when we stop skating, even when we are cranky coaches, and even when we are old and lazy.”

The words are music to your ears. A soft smile draws itself on your face, and he lifts a hand up to press it under your chin, leaning in to place a soft kiss on your lips. It’s incredible, what he makes you feel.

“I’ll marry you, one day,” he promises. “And we can live wherever you want. We can have cats and dogs and plants and, maybe one day, we can have kids too.”

“If we do have kids, I hope they don’t inherit your ego,” you tease, making him laugh.

“No,” Jungkook says, shaking his head. “They’ll inherit my devilish good looks, instead.” You giggle, and Jungkook shuts you up with another kiss, taking away all of the breath in your lungs, making your skin tingle. “I love you, did you know that?”

You grin. You did, but you love hearing the words anyway. “I love you, too.”

↳ links are broken, but don’t forget i’m still taking commissions!

#jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #bts fluff #bts angst #bts scenario #jungkook scenario #bts imagine #jungkook imagine #bts au #jungkook au #w: ice prince

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ad1thi · 4 years ago

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frequent (emergency room) flyer | AU-gust Day 6: Hospital AU

AU-gust masterlist

i wrote this a while back, and a couple of people seemed interested in more, so here is another piece in that AU. tagging @m-e-i-c-h-a-n, @severelytinyeagle and @warmachinesocks (who was the original prompter) and im sorry if you asked for a continuation and didn’t get tagged. note: this can be read a stand-alone fic (but reading the original ficlet will help)

I’m begging you, please help me out here and get me something edible, I’m so tired of hospital food (from this prompt list)

After his first visit, Bucky isn't expecting to see Tony again. Despite how garish the burns had looked on his arms, the actual injury itself had thankfully not been that bad - and Tony only needed to come in one more time for a check in, just to make sure everything was healing well. It was a short visit, nothing to write home about and Bucky privately wished that the injuries had been a bit more severe.

Not too severe, because he didn't want Tony hurting himself, but severe enough that it warranted a couple more visits. Of course he kept that particular inclination to himself, because it wasn't normal to want your crush to be hurt and it was unbecoming for a doctor to want an injured patient, but it was there - in the back of his mind.

When Steve pages him a month later and tells him that he's got a repeat customer, and he ducks into A&E to see a familiar mop of hair; he's secretly pleased.

"What are we looking at?" he asks Steve, holding his hand out for the chart. Steve passes it over with a grim face, "His roommate brought him in. He was unconscious. Apparently he's been locked up in his lab for the past week, and when his roommate went to check on it - he was slumped against his desk. We managed to get him conscious again, and it looks like a case of a lack of food and drink."

Instantly, Bucky regrets the way he felt when he first found out that Tony was back in A&E. He nods sharply at Steve, and pulls back the curtain to see a pale Tony on the bed, and a black kid who can't be more than a few years older than Tony standing near the side of the bed.

"Bucky!" he croaks when he looks up, lips stretching out into a wide smile. He pulls at the black kid's sweater, "Rhodey look - it’s Bucky!"

"I can see that Tones," Rhodey says in a wry tone, and holds his hand out for Bucky to shake. "James Rhodes, but this punk likes to call me Rhodey."

"Doctor James Barnes," he says back, "also cursed with a bestfriend who gives out terrible nicknames. You must be James the original."

Tony gives him an indecipherable look, "You remembered."

Bucky can't tell him that he's played the weekend that Tony was in the hospital in his mind on repeat, revisiting the memories like they’re treasure, so instead he clears his throat and asks, "So what brings you to my neck of the woods this time?"

Tony opens his mouth to reply, but Rhodey beats him, "He doesn't know how to eat. Don't even start with me Tones you know it's true. Doctor," he turns to Bucky with pleading eyes, "maybe you can knock some sense into him. Explain to him that human beings need sustenance three times a day and they can't survive on coffee and ramen."

Bucky frowns, "You've only been having ramen and coffee? Tony you need vitamins, you need protein. While it's possible that you just fainted because of hunger, I'm going to keep you around for a couple of days. Run some tests to make sure you haven't given yourself scurvy."

His lips twist into a pout, and Bucky has to tamp down the urge to lean down and kiss it off his face. "This is all your fault," he glares at Rhodey mulishly, "I'm stuck in a hospital instead of at my lab like I should be. All you had to do was splash some water on me and this whole thing could've been avoided."

"I did, you didn't wake up" Rhodey says, obviously not rising to Tony's bait. He oddly reminds Bucky of himself, back when Steve wasn't a hunkering man made of muscles and Bucky had to wrestle his four foot ass in bed because he couldn't go five steps without dissolving into a coughing fit. "Besides, what're you complaining about? Now you've got all this free time to ogle at the doctor you've been talking my ear off about for a month."

Tony's cheeks pink, and Bucky excuses himself before he does something he's going to regret.

(Like find out exactly what Tony's been saying about him to his bestfriend)

Thankfully, Tony doesn't seem to have any serious illnesses apart from a mild case of dehydration and malnutrition; but Bucky keeps him under observation to be sure just in case. He's heard horror stories of students cracking under the pressure at MIT and almost starving themselves to death, and he's got a special interest in making sure that Tony doesn't become one of those horror stories.

Besides, he's fairly certain that Tony can afford the medical bills.

The downside of Tony not being at high risk of death is that Bucky can't justify visiting him often. So he does the next best thing, he assigns Steve to Tony. It's standard hospital procedure to have a nurse dedicated to their VIP patients, and it soothes something inside Bucky to know that Stevie is looking out for him.

What he fails to take into account, is the fact that Steve and Tony are remarkably similar people, and are therefore bound to clash.

"I can't take it anymore!" Steve bursts into his office, interrupting what was promising to be an extremely rewarding fifteen minutes of sleep at his desk, "He's so - UGH!"

Steve tugs at his hair, and Bucky gestures at the couch in his office, wincing when Steve slumps against it face-first.

"Use your big boy words Stevie," he says in what he hopes is a calming tone, "Who's got you so worked out?"

"Your ickle Tony," Steve props his head up and says in a scathing voice, "Is the most infuriating person I have ever had the misfortune of meeting. It's like he wants to die. I don't know what you see in him Buck, honest to god, he drives me crazy."

"What did he do?"

"He refuses to eat!" Steve moans, but when he notices the expression on Bucky's face he backtracks a little, "He eats, but like ridiculously small amounts. His tray is never empty, and one time - I even caught him shovelling food under his plate to make it look like he'd eaten it. The kid is going to kill himself if he goes on like this."

Bucky wants to go over there right now, but he's got patients that can't wait. "I'll visit him after my rounds today," he promises, "find out what's going on."

When he enters the suite that they've put Tony in, he's in the middle of a very heated conversation on his phone. His skin is no longer pale, flushed full with colour, but he's still too skinny for Bucky's comfort.

"No Pep I -" he looks over when the door slides open, and his face transforms into a smile, "Bucky! Pep, let me call you right back."

Whoever it is on the other line is clearly not happy about Tony cutting the line on them because he hears the beginning of what sounds like yelling - but Tony ends the call before they can get anywhere. He cocks his head and bats his eyes at Bucky, "What can I do for my favourite doctor?'

"I'm your only doctor Tony," Bucky says with a chuckle, "Nobody else is willing to treat you." It isn't a lie, but it isn't the complete truth either. Bucky is Tony's only doctor, but only because he put dibs on any future Tony related visits. So it wasn't that nobody else was willing to treat Tony, it was more that Bucky wasn't willing to let anyone else treat Tony.

"So, what's this I hear about you not eating food? Keeping you under observation for malnutrition is counter-productive if you're not eating Tony." Tony frowns at that, his face twisting like he's had something sour.

He hears out and clasps Bucky's hands, looking up at him with wide eyes, "You have to help me. You gotta get me out of here. They keep trying to make me eat hospital food," he says 'hospital food' in a hushed tone, like he's worried Stevie is going to jump out with a tray and shove it down his throat.

(Knowing Stevie, it was completely possible)

"Tony," he says gently, "You have to eat. It's for your own good. You're dangerously low on vitamins and protein, and if we don't get that stuff in your system you could be running the risk of serious illness. Then you'll be shackled to a hospital room for the rest of your life, with no choice but to eat hospital food."

Tony contemplates that for a second, brows furrowing in concentration. "Okay, how about a compromise? I'll eat hospital food, two times out of the day, if you smuggle me in a cheeseburger for lunch."

"How about this? You eat hospital food all times of the day, and I'll buy you a cheeseburger when we discharge you?"

"You mean like a date?" Bucky suddenly becomes intimately aware that Tony is still holding his hand, "You asking me out on a date Doc?"

Bucky wants to say no, he knows that he's supposed to say no, but what comes out is, "Not yet."

Tony's face twists at that, before smoothening out in comprehension, "It's because I'm your patient isn't it. There's rules about this stuff, ethics or whatever."

"I could lose my license over it," Bucky admits, "not to mention that you're still in college."

"I'm a master's student," Tony says breezily, "I'm older than I look. I turn 22 this May. So how long?" Bucky makes a quizzical noise at him and he explains, "How long until it's okay for you to date a patient?"

"6 months," Bucky rubs the back of his neck with his free hand, "There's a bit of debate on it, but six months is pretty standard."

Tony nods, "I can do six months. I can wait six months."

"You have to stay out of the hospital for six months," Bucky says weakly, "No malnourishment, no lab accidents, you can't even get a scrape on your elbow, otherwise I could get written up."

"I can do that," Tony says confidently, and Bucky knows that he should talk him out of it, but he smiles toothily at Bucky, and he's gone, "I can wait six months for you. Can you?"

"Six months," Bucky says back, and it feels like a promise.

Fin

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shadowsong26fic · 3 years ago

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Coming Attractions!

A day late, but ah well...

As usual, we’ll go ahead and do an Open Question Night. Which basically means that, while my ask box is always open, tonight I’ll be keeping an eye on it and answering things as they come in. Any fandom or work I’ve talked about here (or posted on AO3) is fair game, as are general questions about writing, etc. I do accept prompts, but I am. Not very good at filling them in a timely manner unless they Immediately spark something, lol.

So, yeah, what’s on your mind?

Also, since I don’t think I have for a couple months, plug for my Discord server! It’s pretty quiet, mostly intended to be a slightly more interactive extension of this space, but you’re welcome to check it out!

Anyway, the usual Coming Attractions details are behind the cut!

PodTogether 2021:

I participated in this challenge for the first time this year, and it was a whole lot of fun! Of Other Suns is a SW/AtLA crossover, and I think it turned out pretty well! My reader/podficcer and I worked pretty closely together during the initial brainstorming process, working out what we wanted to do, and also bounced off one another during the whole editing/finalizing process. There’s a lot that I didn’t end up putting into the fic (because time and length; I am a. Uh. Very wordy writer; the aim was for 6-12k words, we ended up with nearly 15k as it is...), so I might poke more at this specific AU, or crossovers linking up at a different time (either a different point in the SW canon, or in the AtLA canon, or both). I...definitely have extensive headcanons for SW characters as benders of various elements (or nonbenders), and there are at least two Force-sensitive AtLA characters who were outside the scope of the crossover.

Anyway, if you want to check it out...click this link XD (and definitely listen to the podfic too!!! It’s really great)

Precipice:

So, between the final push on PodTogether and some origfic stuff I got done, I...did not get anything finished and posted for this, alas. But! I am saying it here in the hopes that doing so publicly will for once get me to actually stick to a deadline, which is that I will get either the first Protectors chapter or the next Preludes one-shot (or both!) up by this Sunday, September 12. The Protectors chapter will be mostly scene-setting, establishing where various characters are when we open, six years after we last saw our heroes. The Preludes segment will involved Hondo contacting Obi-Wan (and Anakin, who’s with him when he gets the call) about something Relevant To Their Interests.

I will for sure get that Prelude out this month, and hopefully at least two Protectors chapters, but we’ll see how things go at work and how much brain that takes, which is always a factor...anyway, with any luck, I’ll start establishing a Rhythm. I don’t think I’ll be doing weekly updates, the way I did for the first few arcs of Precipice (in part because there are some other longform projects I intend to start putting out and if I am going to do Weekly Fic Posts, I’ll probably alternate), but we’ll see how things go.

AtLA Fic:

Again, I didn’t finish what I wanted to (other than the aforementioned crossover for PodTogether), but I have been working on stuff in the background and, while I’m not going to commit to a Specific Deadline like I am for Precipice, I do plan to post at least the opening chapter of the still-untitled Avatar Zuko AU I’ve been working on this month, so watch this space!

Other Fic Projects:

I’m poking around at what to do for next years SWBB (if only because my wordcounts have been Steadily Increasing and I’d like to get a head start in anticipation of that happening again this year, lol). Still considering exactly what to do, whether I pour all my focus into OFLAM, like I consider every year, or see if I can work up Bail Unfucks the Timeline or another half-plotted AU I have in the back of my head, or go with a different prompt/storyline that occurs to me at some point between now and then, but I’m starting to Actively Ponder things.

I do have that BSG1 crossover outline in the works, I swear XD I’ve got...uh...maybe half to two thirds of the first third of the overall storyline written up? XD It’s a. Uh. Long one. I might go ahead and release it in three parts, just for length/convenience, and because it does more or less have three distinct sections (the initial contact/New Caprica fallout and establishment of the Haven settlement which makes sense in context; the second contact/algae planet; and then an adventure on a resurrection ship to retrieve a Specific Boxed Five and possibly walk away with Ellen because that would just ruin Cavil’s day and I do so love to ruin Cavil’s day, lol). ...I’m going to go ahead and post a preview snippet at the bottom of this post, as Motivation XD

I think that’s all the fanfic stuff I have specific updates for. There’s generally always stuff noodling around in my brain (lately, for Star Wars, AtLA, BSG, or some combination of the three), it’s just how much of it materializes, lol.

At some point, I plan to revisit some BSG epics I had going on (Serenissima; rewriting For Sorrow Sung or doing a slightly different storlyine with the same concept; The Other Battlestar; a few others), but no concrete plans as of yet.

I also kind of want to explore a far-past AtLA setting I designed for a challenge community way back? But I’m not sure if that would work better as an original work with the serial numbers filed off, if I could figure out how I wanted to do that (I have done it before, as I’ll talk about below, but this concept, while not directly involving any characters from Avatar canon as it’s set 2000 years prior to Sozin’s reign, does to an extent lean on the Avatar specifically as a concept, in a way that the other fic I did this with did not).

Original Fic:

Due to a challenge on rainbowfic, I actually got. Quite a bit written? Most of it was not super plot-relevant, but I dropped some Hints about a character in Lux and I got to play in some heads I don’t very often. I might go back to the Regency AU at some point, and there’s a specific reveal I want to write up for a secondary character in The Farglass Cycle, but I haven’t quite figured out how to structure that one, so we’ll see how it goes.

Had an interesting discussion the other day about the way original fiction sometimes starts as fanfic with the serial numbers filed off and...well, a lot of my original stuff starts that way? Or has some roots there, anyway.

Lux doesn’t quite as much, but I definitely ported in at least two characters who started as fanfic characters (leaving aside that this is, y’know, The Apocalypse IN SPACE so, like. Various fandoms that deal with that probably influenced things, plus several key players are Public Domain Characters sooooo), plus some of the way the world is constructed draws on the Native Tongue trilogy and I flat-out stole a concept from Queen of the Damned, though the way it works in this world is different (also, to be fair, I think I’ve seen it in other places, too; but I personally got the idea from there).

The Farglass Cycle and Untitled Intrigues Story, however, straight-up started as fanfic concepts. And I don’t think it’s obvious unless I point out what the source materials were? Farglass, in particular (it’s the AtLA fic I mentioned earlier), because it started as an alternate future and then the map and magic system got reworked, plus the Avatar themself wasn’t even super involved in the original fic context, and while certain characters are very loosely based on AtLA characters, by now they’ve been so altered by the setting that it’s...I used the same archetypes, if that makes sense?

And then Untitled Intrigues Story started as a fusion between two wildly different fandoms, and while one character is a pretty clear expy if you know where he comes from, and another character kept the same actress in my head, I don’t think it’s very clear other than that.

...anyway, not sure where I’m going with that, other than it’s been in my head lately, lol.

...I think that about covers it! What about you guys? What are you all working on? Slash any questions, etc.?

Teaser for BSG1 AU outline, as promised:

So, anyway, SG-1 is prepared for rain and mud and a survivable-but-kinda-unpleasant environment. They’re also prepared for the usual shenanigans--Goa’uld, cranky local politics, weird alien tech that Daniel really should know better than to touch but sends him into another dimension anyway...

Just. Y’know. A normal mission.

They’re...not quite prepared for what they actually find when they step through.

Which is a very tense and now slightly Confused crowd of people, and a firing squad made up of very large killer robots, with a teenage girl as their target.

(One of the large killer robots is. Uh. Well. Half a large killer robot now; that particular Centurion was in the wrong place at the wrong time and got kawooshed in the face. As one does.)

(Said Centurion absolutely wins the ‘Weirdest Death’ pool for the week in Download City, because that is clearly a thing that exists because it entertains me)

There’s a beat where everyone just stares at everyone else, trying to figure out what the hell is going on.

The wormhole disengages.

Daniel takes half a step forward, opens his mouth to start the ‘we are peaceful explorers from Earth and y’all seem to be having a Moment here, sorry for interrupting, but, uh...’

And then the moment end and absolute chaos erupts.

#coming attractions #open question night #shadowsong writes star wars #shadowsong writes atla #shadowsong writes crossovers #shadowsong writes original fic #feedback greatly appreciated

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gwoongi · 5 years ago

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(abandoned) it’s late, just stay

john wick / reader genre: sugar daddy au rating: general, mature themes words: 2.4k warnings: sugar daddy relationship, slight john wick 2 spoilers i guess a/n: this 1 is for me. i wrote her in a heat,,,she’s literally not finished. but im adding her to my online portfolio 4 the memories. Also fyi the profile was made before i indulged in seeking arrangements and as a sugar baby i know that ur not allowed to mention 90% of brooklynbaby’s bio in ur bio but who cares man this is fiction and im making it up

At that, she tossed her head back with a laugh and leant forward. “And since when are sugar babies a relationship status?”

Sometimes, John doesn’t really know how he gets himself into awkward situations.

The first few occasions, he figured it was merely a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. While, actually, this always worked out in his favour, John began to notice that it was more frequent that he ended up at a bar with some people he didn’t really know, or being invited to a baby shower as the date of a woman he had never even met before. Granted, John enjoyed company whenever he could get it, and whenever it avoided conflict; however socialism has never been his strongest asset. No, he simply prefers silent gestures or glances across rooms, ‘eye conversations’ where he says hello and nothing else for the remainder of the evening.

“You just need to loosen up a bit,” is what Addy had told him, whilst slipping him a glass of straight Bourbon. It had been a relatively quiet evening in the Continental, and just when John thought he could have five minutes of peace and quiet, Addy has slipped in his line of sight. “You know, go out. Make new friends.”

“You’re my friend,” John replied. He made no room to elaborate on that statement, swallowing the contents of the drink and pushing it back to her with a short nod. She sighed and rolled her eyes, doing her job.

“No, you know what you really need?” He didn’t answer, glancing at her through his hair as she filled his drink and rested her weight on her elbows. Instantly, John didn’t like the feeling in his stomach when Addy raised her eyebrows suggestively, tugging on her bottom lip with newfound excitement: “I think you need to get laid.”

And when John scoffed with humour, she tried again, “and not like, laid as in you have a one night stand. No- hear me out, John! You should invest in a sugar baby. You know, someone you can spend time with when you’re not doing the dirty work for everybody else. It’s fun, and frisky, and also means you can start spending some of the millions you have stashed somewhere not being used.”

She tutted like a scolding mother, “Selfish boy.” Addy then smiled, “Maybe instead of retirement, what you really need is something to help you unwind.”

John scoffed, gulping back the Bourbon. “I’m married.”

At that, she tossed her head back with a laugh and leant forward. “And since when are sugar babies a relationship status?”

That’s really all the thinking he had done on the subject of John- John fucking Wick- investing in a sugar baby. He simply took it in stride, almost complimented by the assumption that he was attractive and rich enough to have someone leaning on him for money and sex, and stored it away for future thought when he was lost and drunk. John never actually considered the possibility of “putting his bills to good use” until fucking Santino D’Antonio decided to light a bonfire inside his house. Having lost virtually everything related to Helen, he found himself back at the Continental, back to listening to Addy sympathetically give her condolences and five seconds later, introducing him to Seeking Arrangements.

John doesn’t know why he’s doing this, staring at the laptop screen that smiles at him. For circumstances, Addy had loaned him her laptop for the evening he spends at the Continental, and he’s too busy browsing the elaborately made profiles that he barely registers the fact that he is still wearing his suit. He pulls at the cuffs of his blazer and is midway through taking it off when he stumbles across a profile- one of which is oddly amusing- titled brooklynbaby. He racks his mind for the reference but can’t seem to place it.

“A sugar baby suggests that I sleep with them, and as I said,” John had mentioned back in the bar, “I’m married.”

Addy had grabbed his hands and groaned, “Look- you might surprise yourself. And, I’m not suggesting that you throw your wife away for somebody new. I’m just saying you need to...make use of yourself. Honestly, you’re too sexy to be stored away like this. Most sugar babies are dumb and unobservant, they won’t even know who you are.”

brooklynbaby makes an adorably hilarious first impression, and John is hesitant to browse her profile. If he wanted to “make use of himself” by investing all of his personal time into somebody who in truth wanted him for his dick and his bank balance, then it needed to be somebody at least near to his wavelength. Somebody who was smart, but clueless at the same time, and somebody who was the complete opposite of Helen. The last thing he needed on top of a handful of a baby was the guilt of moving on. But still, even when he pinned her tab and returned to scrolling through the profiles, John realised that most sugar babies were simply trolls hidden behind pretty pictures, or girls who wanted money for pleasure and not for need.

He went back to brooklynbaby. Three times. Three times, before he pinched the bridge of his nose, muttering a quiet, “Oh, fuck it,” and favoriting her account, and pressing to send a message.

Even online, John was never great with words. He typed, and backspaced, and typed again, trying to come up with something interesting to make up for the bland profile he made around thirty minutes ago.

From: johnwick So. You like dogs?

If Addy were here, she would have slapped him.

Almost immediately after it sends, John lets out a frustrated noise and tears his gaze away from the screen. Dating just wasn’t like how it was when he met Helen. Why did everything have to be so complicated, and mysterious, and why the hell does he even have to waste his money on somebody when he could be saving this money to eventually, whenever the day comes, retire? John wrestles with the dilemma of deleting the whole account when a notification bell rings through the laptop speakers.

From: brooklynbaby yes, I love dogs!!! :D (typing) do you have a dog?

John breathes a sigh of relief.

From: johnwick Yes. I do.

From: brooklynbaby oh, great. :) (typing)

John’s leg begins to bounce quickly, the table wavering with the glass on top, like an earthquake. Suddenly, brooklynbaby stops typing and John stills. Why did she stop? Did he do something wrong? Honestly, women are so hard to please nowadays.

From: brooklynbaby want to be my sugar daddy?

Never mind.

From: johnwick I would.

From: brooklynbaby cool

Neither him or brooklynbaby says anything for a few moments, and John doesn’t notice. After-all, he is still a working man, busy with life and revenge and trying to stay alive for more than three seconds. When he goes back to the laptop and sees no reply, he frowns.

From: johnwick I am sorry. I really don’t know what I’m doing. What am I supposed to say?

He makes a mental reminder to have words with Addy later.

From: brooklynbaby /(*u*)/ you’re cute we could make dinner reservations and talk over terms if you’d like!!! i say reservations because they’re fancy and if anything goes wrong, we can pretend we’re… business partners? discussing business?

Without even really realising, John finds himself laughing shortly, settling back into the chair. All of this feels weird, as in typing to a stranger he’s planning to spend his money on and occasionally fuck. John quickly revisits her profile and spends four minutes analysing her profile picture. If this is her, then she’s really very beautiful. A steal.

From: johnwick When are you free for dinner?

From: brooklynbaby hmm well i’m dogsitting tomorrow, but i can be free for the day after!!!! is that okay ^_^

From: johnwick That would be fine. [Address] at 7pm, does that work for you?

brooklynbaby pauses.

From: brooklynbaby omg am i gonna have to dress fancy?

From: johnwick Don’t feel pressured. I only own black.

From: brooklynbaby well….guess i’ll bring out like one of my old uni party dresses :( but you have to promise not to judge me!!!

John laughs again. At some point during the evening, he ends up with a planned dinner reservation at one of the most expensive restaurants in Brooklyn, and he’s also 2 grand poorer thanks to the generous donation in brooklynbaby’s bank account for a nice evening outfit.

When John returns the laptop to Addy the following morning, he was admittedly expecting the rant that followed. She had glared at the laptop being handed back over the bar and refused to serve him until he came up with a reasonably valid excuse as to why he wasn’t putting himself out there for a bit of company. John had blinked with an unimpressed look and drummed his fingers.

“I have dinner reservations with someone tomorrow at 7pm. Also- can I have a drink?”

But of course, with work being as tedious as ever and with his whole day being completely ruined by a blood stained shirt and poor room service for the first time in his many years of frequenting the Continental, John didn’t amuse himself with brooklynbaby until he logged onto the site on his phone, and saw that she had messaged thrice during the day. He almost felt guilty, until he saw a string of numbers at the end of the last message. He deemed it less necessary to read her above messages and instead went right to texting.

brooklynbaby ok. so should i just ask for mr john wick when i get to this restaurant??? sorry for so many texts im just kinda nervous

me Yes. I booked under my name and I will be waiting for you when you arrive. Why are you nervous? Didn’t you ask me to be here?

brooklynbaby well if we’re going to be technical then YOU asked me to dinner first :P and im nervous because i have nooo idea who you are send a picture?

John sank into bed.

me Maybe I like the element of surprise.

brooklynbaby seems a lil unfair that you get to see me but i dont get to see you :( ive seen ur dog before you thats saying something

me You could have used any image. If we’re going to be technical, I don’t even know your name, or if that is really you in the image.

John really hadn’t been expecting a full blown nude image at 4:15pm in the afternoon, but he will admit that it was nevertheless what he needed to break some steam. He had arrived at the restaurant twenty minutes earlier than expected, but that’s okay, Mr Wick. Right this way! Now that he was sitting here, at an empty table overlooking Brooklyn and the lights, with an already ordered bottle of wine, John could understand and relate to the first date nerves. He hadn’t felt this way in a long time. Not since-

brooklynbaby uhhh im kind of here like ten minutes early should i wait outside for you :3

He laughs, mostly to himself.

me I’m already up here. I ordered a rosé, is that alright?

brooklynbaby YES IM RUNNING

And, surprising himself also, John had clammed up and reached for his glass. Thankfully, the owner of this restaurant knew John by face and order, because, after-all, this had been his go-to with Helen. These days, he doesn’t have time to go out to new places and eat new things, and so had panicked, and picked a place with sentimental value, and a history of good food. He gulped back his glass of Bourbon and waited until the door at the other side of the room opened meekly, and he tried to appear vacant as the waiter led a woman across the room and towards him.

“Your date, Mr Wick.”

He left curtly and brooklynbaby followed his body as he left, her feet firmly glued to the floor as her head looked back over her shoulder. John took this as an opportunity to look at her body, covered in a beautiful dress he felt proud of paying for. Finally, brooklynbaby looked towards him and paused, observing him and his clearly surprising appearance. John then remembered the gash on his cheekbone and the way he probably looked very off-putting with an unshaven face and long hair, but brooklynbaby smiled softly and raised her brows, beating him to helping her in her chair as she quickly sat down and looked at his glass.

“How did you know I liked beards?”

John didn’t say anything for a moment. “I didn’t.”

brooklynbaby rolled her eyes with a grin. “Of course you didn’t.” She looked up, then, properly taking in his face. John did the same, looking at every feature present and coming to the quick conclusion that yes, she was definitely the woman in the pictures, and yes, she was one of the most gorgeous humans he had ever seen on planet Earth since Helen herself.

“You’re not what I expected,” she said honestly. “But, more than my expectations. I don’t believe I’ve really introduced myself- I’m Y/N. Y/N L/N.”

He tried it out in his head. Y/N. Y/N L.N, Y/N L/N, Y/N Wick-

“John,” he replied and she sniggered and rested her chin in her palms.

“You’re seriously so handsome,” she complimented. “Are you sure you’re not married, or something?”

Her gaze panned to his hands where she noticed the wedding band, and for a moment, she hesitated. John wasn’t ashamed of the ring, nor embarrassed to be seen wearing it. He toyed with it on his finger, looking at her from across the table. “It’s complicated.”

Y/N nodded meekly. “I see.” She cleared her throat, “divorce? Planned divorce? Affair?”

“No, I’m widowed,” he tried out a joke, but she only looked more uncomfortable. Her mouth gaped and she fumbled for words.

“Oh, John, I’m really sorry- no, really, I’m so sorry,” she stumbled, and John watched her carefully across the table. “God, how fucking insensitive. Sorry, I guess that just. Wow, that never really crossed my mind. That sucks, I’m sorry.”

“It’s in the past,” John said, finding finality in that sentence. “I’m trying to move on from it.”

Y/N nodded sympathetically. “No, yeah, wow, I get it. Completely. I...hope I live up to great expectations, then?”

John smiled and looked past her, noticing the waiter rounding the corner with the bottle of rose. “You’re getting there, Miss L/N.”

#imagine if i was good and finished this it would be glorious #john wick #john wick x reader #john wick scenario #john wick imagine #john wick smut #john wick sugar daddy #john wick 2 #unfinished #gwoongi

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