#maybe i was informed but just forgot?
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Weird hospital… come to think of it, I’m not sure what hospital this is.
#Janet Drake rp#hmm#this doesn’t feel good#they did say i just came out of a coma#maybe I’m just confused#problem is#i don’t feel confused…#maybe i was informed but just forgot?#someone remind me to ask for which hospital this is#i know I’m not in Gotham though…#i need to sleep.#I’ll handle this in the morning#robin tim drake#janet drake#tim drake#timothy drake#tim drake robin#tim drake wayne#dc red robin#dc#dc comics#dc universe#dc rp#dc robin#dcu#batman and robin#batman#batfam#hospital arc
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i'm sure this post has been made before but the "the list of people i trust and things i believe is down to no one and nothing" to "i trust angus mcdonald entirely" journey that taako takes in the span of roughly one in-fiction hour during lunar interlude reunion tour is so important to me. adventuring partners and friends who have saved his bacon more times than he can count? nah fuck em. organization that has protected him and given him a purpose and fresh start? new stone of farspeech who dis. this nerdy ass boy detective? "angus i trust you implicitly and here's the 100% exact truth as we understand it"
#taako is such an enigma. he's sexy he's unknowable he doesn't give a shit he cares more than anyone in the world#his relationship with angus is soooooooooo. to me.#stuff#taz#taz balance#the adventure zone#the adventure zone balance#taako#angus mcdonald#like also i know that taako says that first thing and then continues trusting magnus and merle and even barry kinda#but the fact that his verbal statements on trust just leap from point A to point B#within the span of about an hour maybe less and with like. NOT that much information gained in between statements#taako swift: i don't trust nobody and nobody trust me#taako 5 seconds later: o shit i forgot about boy detective. i trust 1 somebody
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THE USOS REUNITE WWE SMACKDOWN (OCTOBER 25, 2024)
#no useful tags just me bitching lmao#i am SO unmoved#im praying theres more to all this than them just speedrunning this reunion just so certain things can line up in time for ple shows#and so wrestling fans with less than one braincell can get the instant gratification of their favwit tag team together again 🥺#bc oh bite me lolllll#so much of this ~cinema~ is starting to feel rushed and im just hoping theres turns or angles or REASONS for it#but thats asking me to trust wrestling with carrying storylines fully and i do NOT#the things i wanted most from this story were jey getting proper acknowledgement/vindication and apology for his abuse#and explanation for why the family treats solo as they do (and then expect him to be a well adjusted adult lmao)#jey has NO reason to forgive them yet like did they buy him hallmark cards behind the scenes?#and theyve done much worse to him for much longer the new bloodline#you dont get to brag about this being the greatest slowburn long term cinema storytelling and then just....#im HOPING so bad its not just as simple as it looks i am#they keep swearing theres so many more 'innings' to this so idk prove me wrong please literally do#but that still wont make me moved by ✨og bloodline reunion✨#bc what yall mean yall are still the heels in my eyes like why do you have so many family members yall left on the side of the road#while talking about family above all and dont divide family lmao#and i get ~twin bond~ but LORD#actually that twin bond excuse is evil too#solo go bring in jeremiah since hes technically part of wwe canon too and beat their asses together actually lmao#i aint forgot jey saying something like having brothers is great but how being a twin is just different/special#like yeah sure but can you not make your other siblings sound like secondhand brothers or whatever shdhfhjf#ok im done. for now. for this post. maybe.#venting about my interests is fun for me ok#its how i process the information given to me and understand it#and also i like to bitch
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I have the controversial opinion that maybe, just maybe we stop wanting to go after people with pitchforks for getting characters wrong and not reading the comics inviting them to easy and accessible ways of and making our own content with comic accurate representation
people might feel less anxious about starting comics and misinformation won't spread as easily
#but that just me#I'm a batman fan for maybe all my life but just started seriously getting to the comics of half of the batfamily as an adult#let people take their time#some of them just got here#“THEYRE WRONG” you can block them#“THEY'RE GOING TO INFFECT THE CANNON JUST LIME THEY DID WITH TIM AND COFFEE” make accurate jokes then push people who make accurate jokes#interact with accurate jokes#make informative posts#if every time we feel the hit to beat up a comic inaccuracy post we make a funny little comic accuracy post maybe there won't be as much#disinformation peace and love on the planet earth.#never going to forget how much I shit on bad spideypool fanfics until I get to read some of my favorite writers old fanfics and they were#absolutely nothing like the characters#some people take time some people don't know where to start#some people don't have time to read the comics#some people don't have your favorite character whole backstory engraved#“THEY CAN RESEARCH” of course and fannon would be better if they did but have you consider....you have the power to make it better#i just think sometimes we can take the spite and make something beautiful#q rambles#i wrote the shit and forgot to finish LMAO
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don't let an art ed major watch Carmen sandiego 2019 I've been stewing on how they used stylized images of Vermeer's work & discussing the technical strength of the light rendering in them YET they never show real images of the paintings to demonstrate the point. BOOOOOO L L L 👎
#nobody in discord cares about my carmen sandiego live watch so you guys get to hear it instead whether u like it or not#its just i cant get it out of my mind how you cant discuss an artwork and like. not show the real thing !!!!#im fine with the sylized version being used in more animated segments to keep everything feeling in the same universe style#but i think for moments like. when they zoom in or that segment where they talk about regional facts shouldve had the real images#theyre like. public domain arent they. why not use them. cmon#i love the look of the show sm but its supposed to also be educational & its a problem if the go all style no function#i kinda even think for the regional facts segments they should use real images & footage#to help viewers connect the information taught in the show to real life#but honestly ive been fine with the stylized little icons and stuff they used for those moments . up until now#and maybe i only noticed this issue in the educational format when it started crossing into what im literally studying for a degree in#rando thoughtz#i forgot to mention i think that when youre literally discussing a visual aspect of an artwork#not showing the real artwork just leaves the point unsupported and thus why i think its a poor art teaching moment in the show
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heartslabyul office au in which you, ace, and deuce are coworkers who are somehow always on the verge of being fired because you’re almost always late with deadlines and can never truly focus. T_T one day you take the fall for ace and deuce thinking ceo rosehearts will be more lenient with you (or so you think he’ll be lenient when vice president trey clover escorts you to the ceo’s office, always so kind in his outlook).
and to your relief and surprise, the ceo is lenient. too lenient. so lenient he actually promotes you instead! now you’re his secretary, many floors above where you once worked, in your own private office space, and with this new proximity you get to know both the ceo and vp. unfortunately, this means you hardly see ace and deuce during work. D: but in the ceo’s eyes that’s much better. you’re where you belong: at his side, away from the bad influences that are ace and deuce.
#meraki mumbles#ace is that annoying coworker who is always asking you to get dinner#by asking he just always assumes you want to get dinner T-T#one day it’ll work and you’ll say yes… one day… orz#edit - I FORGOT CATER WAIT OMG#HE’S THERE…. HMMM CEO RIDDLE’S SECRET WINGMAN??? OTL#maybe it’s a quartet: ace deuce cater and reader :D#and cater’s sharing information he learns about you to riddle so he has better chances of charming you
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not even joking abt the cognitive decline anymore im actually scared. i saw the tv glow hit too hard for me everything has felt wrong and i don't even know since when, do i have long covid brain fog? residual damage from my concussion this past fall? what about my first concussion six years ago? i feel like there are pages missing. i feel the gaps in my knowledge and awareness and abilities. im scrambling around in the dark
#everything's so mentally taxing and maybe it's because im rotting my brain with screens#maybe it's the adhd (7 months off my meds)#maybe it's that im just stupid.#im rereading one of my favorite book series from childhood (fablehaven) on a nostalgia kick#and i have to keep turning back a page bc i missed something. THIS IS A MIDDLE GRADE NOVEL#it's frustrating#today i couldnt remember basic information like i forgot how much my horse's board is and the name of an old trainer#and i lost my way 3 times trying to take my friend on a trail ride on a route i regularly go.#maybe it's also lack of sleep#idk
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I really can't be trusted with definitions of terms cause I will be so petty about people using terms wrong.
#tho funnily this does only apply to some extent as I'd never be petty about the terms a person uses for themselves#except maybe with the exception of neurodiverse vs. neurodivergent#cause that's something ive noticed people just mix up a lot but if it's an informed choice to use neurodiverse as a label#who am i to judge#however i am an asshole about Germans using coming out and outing synonymous#i will stand by a radical definition of neurodivergence and queer#and there was some word that made me make this post but i forgot again
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Why did it take me so long realize that the reason why the angelology in good omens was so different from what I grew up with is that because it's Jewish angelology..... Not catholic or occultist.... I knew Gaiman was Jewish and I stop to think about it 🧍
#i was there like “whys Gabriel the supreme archangel when its usually Michael?”#maybe im just too used to catholic and occultist angelology i forgot the angels exists in judaism too😭#hate to admit i spent nights wondering about this#like i spent nights wondering about this for so damn long 😭✋#now i can FINALLY die at peace knowing this information#gaiman when I catch you Gaiman.#good omens#good omens season 2
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i try not to let it get to me but the knowledge i am always going to be The Stupid One in every situation i’m in just…really, really sucks. sigh. oh well. i stay silly :3c
#cant even blame it on being audhd because everyone else i know who is#is smart and talented and their brains work alright 😭 i'm just stupid and incapable#i feel like i’m the only person out there who does not get to experience any of the benefits or joys of these things#for me it is nothing but brain damage and endless suffering with no brightside or intelligence or anything#but then everyone tells me i’m the bad guy because if there was a magic button that would make me not audhd i would click it immediately#like why am i wrong for not wanting to suffer#everyone else seems to have a special interest or a fixation and they can remember information about those things but i...dont. i can't. LO#i do not experience the autistic joy everyone else talks about. i dont have the adhd focusing on what you like superpowers or whatever#my autism made me barely pass highschool and i couldnt handle community college and i had to drop out and i can barely handle having#an entry level job that everyone patronizes me about#i'm barely verbal and i am losing my ability to function to brainfog and everyone around me treats me like i'm their little pet idiot#but wanting to change that about myself makes me evil and bad or something i guess#sorry to whine on tumblr like the good old days but twitter is sick of my shit LOL 😭#pmdd making me spiral worse than usual#one of those times where i'm realizing that if everyone else experiences these things totally different from me than maybe that was never#what was wrong with me in the first place lol. maybe i dont have an explanation and i'm back to being 10 15 19 24 sobbing wondering why im#like this. why i'm so stupid. not even in a self hating way in a legitimately proven way that i am functioning below average intelligence.#ok im done sorryyyyy god i forgot how good tumblr is to vent on#z
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i find it interesting how many people seem to be primarily mentioning tragedies in palestine and the like exclusively for the purpose of putting down other issues in the world, some genuinely less relevant (a tv show) or some that are like, also genuine issues (domestic terrorism??? i saw someone complain that people are concerned about another january 6 right wing riot when palestine is happening when like.... both things are worth discussing???)
#i assume Maybe they meant people (dems) are hypocrites for bashing domestic terrorism while ignoring/supporting the genocide#but that was Not how it was phrased#im generally more drawn to reblog informative posts with links and guides about things that help people#not posts that just.... use peoples deaths to put down a tv show. lmao.#like you guys know the reason ofmd made its goal faster is bc its One fundraiser and there are Many gaza fundraisers#so the same people donating to ofmd donating to all those fundraisers would mean each one is less likely to meet its goal#also nobody outside of tumblr is prioritizing ofmd over gaza. i dont think most people know what that show Is.#i forgot it existed until i came on tumblr recently and it became exactly what i knew it would be someday#(a weird pawn treated with the same power as literal real life crimes bc ppl think tumblr = life)
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Damn the New Moon and Full Moon drama CDs are honestly some of the most interesting P3 related stories/titles out there, the information we get on the Kirijo Group and Mitsuru's mother (along with the story) is so juicy.
#reading the script of new moon atm and yeah actually its so fire#like not only did they give us really good information on the group and stuff but it also gave us kikuno who i absolutely adore#so glad they added her in arena#shame im gonna have to like. rewrite an entire section of my au though because i forgot like half of the group lore from this 😭#but thats a me issue LMAO#seriously though they're on youtube if people haven't listened to them already#alos the story?? crazy but in a really good way#reading through the script of new moon rn because i was trying to remember what was said about mitsuru's mother#kinda wish we got a little bit more on her because i really want to know more about her relationship with mitsuru and this illness she has#but hey i'll take what i can get#i just realized i said the same shit twice maybe its time to go to bed 😭
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i really wish my memory was better so i could actually retain and recall more knowledge about the things i enjoy.
like wdym i spent hours looking at my fixations and delving into details and facts and watching hours of video essays and whatevr but my mind goes blank when anyone asks about it??? or even just on my own???
#i know its gotta be in there#if i re-read info its like...ok i already knew that. it doesn't feel new as if i completely forgot#i just can't fish it out of my brain#i could be bursting witj so much information if i could just Remember#maybe its the osdd. maybe its undiagnosed adhd. or mayhaps i am actually stupid
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hi i have to rant about a VERY SPECIFIC TEACHER *inhales sharply* but i will do it in the tags read at your own discretion etc etc
disclaimer: i love teachers i admire teachers i think they're more important than most other jobs and i would be a teacher when i graduate if the working conditions rn weren't horrible. I don't have anything against most teachers, just this specific one
#Yeah we are talking about you Mrs [redacted]#you absolutely could have taught us that stuff but the reason you didn't is because you're a) unqualified for this position#and b) you don't care enough to even learn more about this subject despite teaching it for multiple years now#like you say you love this subject but i am more knowledgeable than you are you fucking hypocrite#the assignment you gave us was way out of the scope of this class and you're only doing this because you either#dont want to teach it or can't and look#if it was your first year I'd forgive you but you've been doing this for a few years now you have no excuse#to not know the class content when the materials are RIGHT THERE for you to learn but you simply won't#that's what you get for being an anti-intellectual and a teacher at the same time#Like maybe if you actually cared about this subject instead of acting like Jesus is your blorbo from your shows you could be a good#and informed teacher who loves engaging with her students at a deeper lever#but instead you don't know anything and when you have students who actually WANT to engage with you#you shut them down and you hate them for it#i hate you you insufferable hypocritical sorry excuse for a teacher#you should not be teaching or influencing young minds at all with your severe lack of critical thinking and anti-intellectualism#oh and don't forget bias#don't think i forgot how you spent 3 days talking about how bill nye isn't actually credible DESPITE HIS POSITIONS ALIGNING#WITH THE CLASS'S JUST BECAUSE HE IS AN ATHIEST#YOU FUCKING PREJUDICED JERK#you would rather denounce science than admit you might agree with an athiest#quit teaching and get out of my life
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[and the rest of the post!]
...... but her circumstances have recently changed.
by cutting frank out of her life (both because she wants a future he's not offering and because she wants to punish him; i have plenty of thoughts about that too), she has eliminated her only source of friendly human contact. she and frank bonded over being hated by everyone else! they encouraged that in each other! but now... she’s all alone.



hawkeye is now in the business of making digs on frank's behalf, and that's another social avenue closed off. she was becoming friendly with both hawkeye and b.j. — they're the first people she told about her engagement! — but (largely because of how clueless and obnoxious she was in that episode) frank got the swamp rats in the divorce, so to speak.
so she's lonely to the point of distress, but she's so boxed-in by her inflexible belief in power structures and has been terrorizing everyone since we met her, so she can't easily walk that back without... abandoning her hold on those power structures long enough to apologize (which i noticed she doesn't do in this episode, but when in her whole life would she have ever seen an authority figure apologize?). and taking a cheese grater to her ego, because it's not like people are going to immediately embrace her, so she'll deal with rejection while she tries to change.
and what if they make fun of her to her face instead of behind her back — which is worse??


i find it telling that they call her 'hot lips' when she's not around — and i'm sure she knows they do. in the script, the act one tent scene is much longer, and the nurses debrief the O.R. shitshow and then drag margaret for a page and a half before she arrives:


and then on-screen, when mary jo tries to protect gaynor (the one on the top bunk with dark hair):
sorry for the gazillion caps; i swear this is actually the readers' digest version oh my god












having this episode right after "lt. radar o'reilly" is such a brilliant accident, because dear sweet radar just put words to the tragedy and loneliness of military success. radar was jealous of the officers in theory, but is so much happier back among the grunts, because it's better to take disrespect and abuse from above together than to take it from below while isolated and alone.
from season 5 "lt. radar o'reilly":




which is exactly what's happening here!! margaret has wanted this promotion all her life, but she probably didn't picture having it in the middle of nowhere. she has no family waiting at home for her at night, no peers she can relate to, not even a terrible boyfriend in her tent anymore. she barely knows her absent fiancé; would she dare send him an honest letter about her day that isn't all sunshine and idealized presentation?
so with all that, whether or not she deserves it, i love that the nurses offer her an olive branch at the end.
earlier, margaret started the professional reconciliation by finally allying herself with the nurses and protecting them in front of colonel potter. it's long overdue; up until now, we have only seen variations of the opening O.R. scene, where she criticizes them in public instead of rising to their defense. this part of their dynamic is entirely on her to mend — no one else can help her.


and then, later...



the nurses are far more emotionally aware than she is. this is the best possible move they could make — it defuses another potential standoff, and it's their way of thanking margaret for letting baker off the hook. it shouldn't have to be up to them to change the culture and improve their relationship with their supervisor, but they're honestly more capable of it. and it's very sweet how margaret immediately responds.
the nurses are all adult women who value their social connection with each other, and they recognize someone in distress who doesn't really know how to initiate kindness, and took a chance to show her. <3 <3


i hope this improves things for everyone! i think it will! and i definitely hope margaret thinks long and hard about all this, because if she lets it, it could really change her life.
tl;dr: poorly socialized feral cat domesticated by the mortifying ordeal of being known and one (1) cup of terrible army coffee.
[i reblogged the tumblr post where i found the script here.]
i know some of you have been pressing your faces to the glass waiting for me to see this one in particular SO i saw "the nurses" the other night and am still thinking about it!!
i love love love it when characters get pushed to a point where you can almost see their childhood selves pop out, like are they even talking about what's happening right now? or are their 12-year-old hearts just screaming?? i love that margaret's outburst is both irrational (the hostile work environment is coming from inside the house; i was yelling at my tv "baby it's your fault!!!") and so so honest.


[this turned into a bit of a character thesis, so not only is there a readmore, there will also be a reblog soon with the rest of the post because i maxed out the image limit!]
this whole time, margaret has treated her subordinates with a heavy hand because she thinks it's the right and fair thing to do. the rules say this is how it works!
she maintains a high standard of excellence in brutal circumstances, but she's also reactive, moody, and unforgiving. she's often shown on the edge of losing control and authority, she inflames situations by overreacting, and the thing she punishes most egregiously is disrespect (toward frank, toward the army, toward herself). she intentionally underlines the distance between herself and the other nurses at every turn.
from season 3 "there's nothing like a nurse": [all IDs in alt]




really, everything she thinks and does comes from a place of "they're not supposed to like me," but the childish part of her that is completely unable to see her own behavior is confused and hurt because "i'm just doing my job so why don’t they like me???"




it's her job to maintain discipline, but especially here in 4077-land, she doesn't have to lead with the whip. henry was beloved because he was an overly permissive clown, which will never be her speed, but colonel potter has all the same training as she does. he's loved and respected as the Good Regular Army Guy because he leads with discernment and mutual respect.
it's easier for him. he's more experienced, he's respected and supported from above and below, and he has a calm temperament — which isn't nothing.
from season 4 "the interview":


whether she's aware of this as a problem or not, we at home can see how margaret's inability to control her emotional reactivity causes her as much grief as her inability to control other people.
if she were capable of laughing off small slights, hawkeye and trapper wouldn't have used her as a chew toy so much, and henry might have taken her real concerns more seriously if they weren't lost in the noise of daily fits, you know? she rarely started it, so i'm not blaming her for the hostile chaos circus of seasons 1-3, but i am saying she would have had a better time if she knew how to take a few deep breaths.
this description from the script, after the near-brawl in the nurses' tent in act one, is basically her character thesis statement:
and here, when she's reacting fully emotionally, the truth comes out! the reason that she won't be flexible and show compassion to the nurses isn't because of the rules, but because they're mean to her!!






that's obviously a very bad place to lead from. she has enormous institutional power over them, including controlling their freedom of movement, but she feels like all the other girls in school are hanging out together and they hate her. because they are! and they do! the fight in act one boils over when they make fun of her hair, and that sent all of them back to middle school.
and in many ways, that's where margaret's emotional maturity is stuck (which is, i think, why i find her so endearing). she can't see herself. she knows they don't like her, trust her, or want her around, but she doesn't understand how she dug this hole herself, or how to get out of it.
to add insult to jealous injury, one of the nurses (mary jo, who gets between margaret and baker to stop the fight and takes care of the others in different ways) is margaret's age, and the others look to her as their chosen leader and personal support.
and i'm sure margaret had NO IDEA this was the messy truth until she heard it come out of her mouth.
and her emotionally breaking on the "one lousy cup of coffee" in particular…


i wonder, how often does some version of that first tent scene happen? does she deliver their assignments every night? she walks in already defensive, they immediately stop laughing, and then... she either finds a reason to scold them or they ice her out until she leaves. (and they probably start laughing again as soon as she does!)



from her perspective, when she arrived for the dreaded sleepover and they turned out the lights the minute she walked in, it's like they cancelled the nightly coffee klatch just to avoid spending one social minute with her.



i also think the nurses are right when they assumed that she wouldn't have accepted an invitation to hang out with them (and might even have snapped at them for being inappropriate for asking). she doesn't cross that emotional line, even when she should — she didn't know gaynor was spiraling after losing so many patients in a row, and didn't respond compassionately when she learned.
has she ever invited them for coffee or a friendly chat? no.



...... but her circumstances have recently changed.
[reblog coming soon with the rest of it!]
#whew!!!!#apparently i think about her a normal amount#i want you all to know how very restrained i was actually in keeping this to the episode and not pouring out all my ill-informed headcanons#since i have seven seasons left of character knowledge still to go#but i can't help imagining what margaret's experience was as a junior officer herself because i suspect it was the time of her life#and maybe she had a supervisor who was also super strict (which would help her thrive!) but was more fair about it#(and probably didn't have a frank burns around to constantly defend on the job)#so margaret would have loved this supervisor and seen her colleagues do the same even though they got tough love in return#and so margaret just doesn't see the difference -- so is stuck in the 'why don't they like me?????' and can't see the answer#(even though the answer is so! obvious! to everyone else!!!)#mashblogging#margaret houlihan#<- in case anyone is coming from afar and sees this i don't usually use character tags it's all just a mashblogging junk drawer#so feel free to dig around the rubber bands and paper clips#mash#edit: whoops forgot two caps they're in there now#deep dives
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Oh my god. I just wrote an essay in the comments of a fanfic and I was like Wow, I sure had a lot to say.
And then I remembered I actually took my adderall this morning XD
#may rambles#ah yes - my sudden ability to communicate and have thoughts#there you are#it’s so nice to see you#well in my defense - the author also was pondering about what is essentially a special interest for me in their authors notes and invited#commentary on it… so. you know. the unlocked my unskippable dialogue WHILE I’m on adderall. I cannot be blamed#:3 the topic of course being fandom and sexuality#and asexuality and gay slash ships and the female audience#fascinating stuff and it’s very complex#i loooove when there is not right answer and ultimately peoples feelings are valid on both ends and there’s long sociopolitical histories#playing into everything and the more you learn the less clear everything is#YEEEES#god being an acafan is so so fun and I kinda forgot because I no longer have a reason to engage with fandom in that way#but it brought me back to writing that long research paper for my global sexuality class and it makes me want to go find it again and read I#*read it#I wonder if it was even good#I FOUND IT.#lol - you can tell I rushed the ending a bit but I did get a perfect score on it so oh well#I had forgotten the specific topic was Lesbian Voices in Fandom#I think I presented a lot of interesting information but I don’t think I tied everything into a compelling argument very well#i kinda forgot what my central thesis even was by the end#so actually maybe it was primarily the ending where I failed at that because I did present a lot of evidence#I just could’ve brought it all home a lot better#you can tell it was the only long research I ever wrote I think#got a little lost in the sauce#oh well :3 it was fun and enlightening and I got a lot out of it#and im sure the professor could tell#I liked him a lot#soooo sad I was graduating when I was - he was looking to take on student researchers and his areas of research were EXACTLY the stuff I’m#deeply interested in
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