#lymphoma tw

[ultfan]

komaeda doesn’t blush often, if at all. his paleness isn’t due to lack of sunlight, but rather anemia (a common thing for people dealing with lymphoma + there’s no way he has enough iron in his diet with how he eats). it’s another health issue, so it’s not that he wouldn’t blush — he just doesn’t have enough color in his skin/red blood cells/iron in his blood to do so.

me fighting the blushy/drooly komaeda fanon one step at a time.

[drkinhome]

Hey, it's the Nagito that wanted a shufflemancy, I just wanted one with my relationship with Izuru! Sorry that I confused you

He Loves Me Not, the Flowers Told Me / Backseat Vagabond

———————————–

Sittin' on a swing set

I know it's awful childish

But there is pollen on my fingertips

And there are tears in my eyes

Sweet roses and honeysuckle

Buttercups and sunflowers

It's always the pretty ones

Who come with thorns

He loves me not

He loves me not

He loves me not

He loves me

He loves me not

He loves me not

How many petals must I pick

Till he'll love me?

———————————–

It’s possible that rather than (or in addition to) lymphoma, you suffered from Hanahaki disease due to your attachment to Izuru. You were deeply in love with him, but he didn’t reciprocate. You idolized him, but he hurt you by rejecting your advances. You were succumbing to your illness, unable to get an “I love you” from him.

[acknowledge-reigns]

So I know next to nothing about Halsey, their career or who they are as a human (other than they use they/them pronouns if I'm not mistaken and are known for singing?) but I just wanted to send love and support to their fanbase. Roman Empire has been there, we see you. We know exactly what you're feeling. How it hurts to see your hero go through something like this. Healing vibes to Halsey and strength to their friends, family, fans and loved ones durring this time.

[k1tty-b0t77]

For all of those without a father, or ones being abused, neglected, etc, I'm so fucking sorry. You don't deserve that. Take care of yourself today. Fuck what he wants today. Today is your day, I've decided. Eat something yummy, take a shower, take a walk, watch something funny or comforting. You deserve it for putting up with that shit. I love you and happy You Day.

[lesbianslovemorgott]

Every day for months now I've been terrified that I'll come home to my dog dead or dying, or that she'll suddenly start dying in front of me. She's had lymphoma since about last August, so it's already crazy that's she's still living and doing well, because the prognosis for that is usually a few months. She's really skinny and has lost a lot of muscle mass but she's still so peppy. I just don't really know what I'm going to do when the time comes

[stick-arms]

Hey folks, our Beloved Professor Science, my last remaining son, has just been diagnosed with lymphoma and given a very bad prognosis. He's doing okay right now, but there's a big doomsday clock hovering over my family now that none of us can ignore.

We're looking at chemotherapy for as long as we can get away with it, then palliative care. It's gonna be gritty and it's gonna get expensive, but everyone is on the same page of "keep him as comfortable as we can for as long as we can."

My grandmother is also undergoing chemo, but with a significantly less grim outlook (no timer on her, if she cops it we'll all be shocked.) But it should be noted that my family is quite small, so getting hit with the Big C twice in the span of a month or two is rough.

So if I vanish from here, or get really weird and moody, this is why. Losing Dangerclaw suddenly back in 2021 fucked me up real bad, so we're doing what we can to ease into this new situation while we still have our heads on straight. The clock is ticking.

If anyone has candid experience with lymphoma in cats to share, I'd be interested to know.

Otherwise, idk. I don't share a lot on here anymore, so can't commit to any conversations, but I know enough of you are cat people and a lot of you have loved him over the years, and might want to know.

Here's our boy, looking bitchy in a sun beam, radiating gay energy.

[rin-the-cat]

I was going to edit and add this rant to my previous post but it got so long I decided to give it its own post.

I don't understand how Doctors get a way writing up their notes like they do. At the vet clinic where I work, if a doctor doesn't examine something on an animal they put in the record that they did not examine it, but this never seems to be what human doctors do. Lets use my recent visit to a Rheumatologist. I will begin by prefacing that, in this case, I did not come away from the visit feeling like he had done a poor job. He did an exam that I felt was adequate for the situation and he asked all the right questions. However, the notes that he put into my legal medical record do not reflect the exam that he actually did.

Warning: very long rant ahead.

TLDR: Doctors lie in legal medical records all the time and sometimes it can have major consequences, but apparently not for the doctor or they wouldn't keep doing it.

ENT examined for oral mucositis, moisture, thrush, nasal deformity, external ear redness, deformity.

He did not look into my mouth and I don't think he was sitting close enough to me to get a good look from me just talking.

Abdomen examined for softness, tenderness, obvious organomegaly.

He never touched my abdomen

Neurological examination done for alertness, speech, facial symmetry, tone and power in upper and lower extremities, and gait.

He never checked tone or power in my lower extremities. I'm not sure that he examined the tone or power of my upper extremities now that I think of it. The only opportunity he had to see my gait was the two steps it took for me to get to the table, and I was very obviously limping.

The joint examination is performed for swelling, tenderness, warmth, erythema, and range of motion in the following joints: DIPs, PIPs, MCPs, wrists, first CMC's, elbows, shoulders, hips, knees, ankles, feet; spine for range of motion and paraspinal muscles for tenderness.

He did feel the joints in my hands (the reason why I was there.) but he didn't check range of motion on any joints or feel anything in my lower extremities.

The salient normal / abnormal findings are appended.

I suppose this line is supposed to excuse the fact that everything above it was a copy/pasted generic normal exam findings...

She is tender in the PIPs especially ring middle and index fingers, she does not have definite synovitis in any of the palpable joints. She does not have dactylitis. There is no nail pitting or onycholysis. She does not have a rash on her face there is no sclerodactyly periungual erythema. She has minimal if any tenderness across trapezius along the paraspinal regions. She did not have any significant tenderness in the trochanteric areas

This is the exam that he actually did in its entirety. Why type this out and include the copy-pasted bit that reports normal exam findings for things you didn't examine? What if you put this in my medical record today and tomorrow I ended up in the ER with a giant abdominal tumor that you somehow missed when you supposedly palpated my abdomen. It seems like you could/should get in serious trouble if something like that happened.

And that is basically what happened to my mom. She went in for pain in her back, over her ribs. The doctor didn't touch her except to "hit" the spot that hurt (her words, not mine. I do know that the spot that was hurting was so tender that a tap could have felt like he smacked her.) He declared that she had a broken rib, sent her to x-ray then sent her home. However the exam notes he put in her record read just like the ones above. The next day the pain was so bad she ended up in the ER where it was discovered that she had stage 4 lymphoma. It would not have been possible to do the exam that his notes claimed that he did and not realize that there was something more than a broken rib going on. This is a pet scan of her upper body. For those unfamilure with looking at CT scans or PET scans. the gray area at the top is her brain, the scan goes down to her mid-waist, and her arms are held up above her head. All of those bright white blobs are enlarged, involved lymph nodes.

On a normal person, you would only feel one node on each side of the neck and one node in each armpit area There are more there, but they would normally they would be too small to really feel. You can see on this scan that if he had palpated her neck, he would have felt numerous lumps. If he had felt her armpit (which you might not normally do, but if there were a bunch of enlarged nodes in the neck, you would probably feel the armpits next), he would have felt many lumps there too. If he had done the thorough exam that his medical exam notes claimed he did, he would not have though this was a simple broken rib.

Now would it have made a difference if it had been caught 24 hours sooner? Absolutely not, but that's not the point. The point is that Doctors lie in their patients medical records every day. Lying in a legal medical records is grounds for losing your license so why is lying and saying you examined something that you did examine given a pass? Why would doctors take the risk of doing multiple times a day, every day?

I like the way our medical records software is set up at the vet clinic where I work. There is a check list of all the systems that are typically examined. If a Doctor examines a system and it's normal they check a box but don't enter any notes. If something is abnormal they check the box and put in their notes in the text box next to the chart. If they don't examine a system (say there's an aggressive dog in for a routine exam, they might skip looking in the mouth.) then they don't check the box. When they are done it auto-populates the exam findings and for any system not examined it lists it as not examined. And that's now it should be, if a doctor doesn't examine something, they shouldn't be reporting normal findings. And here's the thing, the doctors that I work with actually do do a thorough exam, nearly every time. Doesn't matter if the dog is in for a well check or because they are sick, they look in the ears, eyes, mouth. they feel all the lymph nodes. They check range of motion on all four limbs. They feel the spine and check for neurological deficits. They listen to the chest. They palpate the abdomen. And that last one is a big one because dogs tend to get these primary splenetic tumors that are totally asymptomatic until one day it ruptures and the dog bleeds out. There have been many times where these tumors were discovered at an annual well check and the spleen could be removed while the dog was healthy instead of it being an emergency surgery on a critically ill dog. And the vet does all this so quickly and with a practiced ease that you might not even notice them doing it.

I think part of the reason that this is standard practice at any (decent) vet practice is because animals can't tell us where it hurts or how they are feeling, and I suppose human doctors assume we will be able to tell them if something is wrong. But here's the thing, that's not always true. Someone might have had a problem their whole life and assume that it's a normal thing. I tend to clam up at the doctor and forget what I wanted to say (It's really annoying, take the rheumatology visit for an example. My hands have been a major problem for me lately, the pain interferes to some degree with nearly every daily task that requires dexterity, but once I'm sitting in the office I sound more like, "My fingers hurt a little I guess... I don't know, I guess when I open jars 'n stuff" and mean while the doctor is probably thinking, "wtf is she doing here?" and I know the solution to this should be to write a list but when I try to do that my mind goes blank. My mostly nonverbal autistic 7 year old certainly isn't going to be able to tell the doctor what the problem is. I can't even get him to point to where it hurts when he hurts himself, i just have to wait and see where the bruise pops up.

[baellielurk]

dreamt w my old cat who passed last october. she was sleeping on a pillow in the new house i was moving into (in the dream) and i got to pet her - i think it was a thing where i could bring her back to life for a bit each day - and she stretched and showed me her tummy even. the boys were there, too, having a nap too, and she even curled up next to the one she did know. I'd like to think this was her visiting me now that she's spent sufficient time curled up with her previous owner. im glad to have seen her again ❤️

[hansel-and-grendel]

[healingheartdogs]

Heavy content concerning cancer and euthanasia ahead.

Need to call the vet today. We made a follow up appointment for a month out the last time we went in but I'm thinking that was probably an overly optimistic time frame. When she called to give the cancer screening results she asked us about whether or not we were potentially interested in chemo and we said we needed to talk about it and she told us to take our time and that he should be okay for as long as this round of meds he's on (2 weeks). The swelling in his face, legs, and throat is already back though and he's starting to lose coordination again, although he is still up and being more active so far and walking on his own which he couldn't last week. He's also starting to not want to take his pills but only the antibiotics, he still is taking the three pain meds he's on easily enough. He is especially avoidant of the amoxicillin which I have to give him twice a day and it's becoming a struggle. I think he must have decided it's making him feel bad.

Those few good days after he got antibiotic shots at the vet last week really had me getting hopeful for a moment, but now seeing him start to get sick of his meds and deteriorating again I'm wondering how I could possibly maintain his QOL to put him through chemo. Especially because he is fear reactive, he is a bite risk, he is terrified of the vet office, and he has seizures when he gets stressed out. Our last vet visit was short and sweet and painless so it wasn't so bad for him, but I can't imagine the care required for chemo would be that way. And what would the end goal be? Just keeping him alive longer? From what I've read remission for lymphoma tends to be very temporary, and everyone I know who has lost a dog to lymphoma is telling me they regret prolonging life as long as they did for their dogs.

I keep going through this over and over in my head and talked about it with Selene and we both agree that we have doubts about our ability to keep his QOL up for something like that. Logically, I know what the choice that will cause the least suffering in the long run is. But there's such a loud voice in my head screaming furiously at me that I can't give up on him yet because he wants to live and that if I don't try everything first I'm failing him. I think no matter what choice I make here I'm going to be filled with a crushing amount of regret, either for waiting too long and prolonging suffering or because of all the what ifs of making an earlier decision and the more active role that makes me play in choosing for him to die.

[ultfan]

RANDOM KOMAEDA RAMBLE #1.

komaeda has pretty abnormal eating habits. he tends to only eat certain foods, most often things high in carbs. these, of course, being pretty common symptoms of bvFTD. it's definitely a behavior that started in his late teens. however, as a side effect of his lymphoma he has a decreased appetite, often feeling full after hardly eating. it's shown both in game and in his art book that it isn't rare for him to just have a single piece of plain toast for breakfast.

i do think that's something that got worse during his time as an ultimate despair. especially when he was working as a servant for the warriors of hope— i remember reading somewhere that they didn't feed him and he messed up their food on purpose because it was the only time he'd be able to eat something. even if it was gross.

in a post-dr2 world i do imagine komaeda would be lucky enough to beat cancer with the proper treatment— which i can't imagine wouldn't be provided to him given all the effort that's gone into the rehabilitation of the remnants. after that point i feel like komaeda would start developing a habit of binge-eating, doing a bit of a 180, and probably gaining a sweet tooth that he didn't have before. that would be something that happens over the last few years of his life as his symptoms get worse. given that he's lived way past his original life expectancy, i think komaeda would probably end up at the later end of the average life expectancy. which would get him to 25-29 at the latest. so he'd have 3-7 years left after the neo world program.

this was just supposed to be about eating habits and then i started talking about his life expectancy... oops.

[celestavamp]

round 3 of chemo this one is a different sauce but similar side effects so that’s chill PEMBRO GVD vibes for today

This cancer is trying to resist but we aren’t going to let it -.- FUCK CANCER

[cruentaquevivere]

For Nikki

Head still pounding,

but I’m awake,

and by all estimates,

you’re probably gone.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

I hope you finally

aren’t in pain,

and that your last hours

were full of peace.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

I hope you gave

a hug to your mom

and told your daddy

he doesn’t need to be strong.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

Your brother will feel this

for years, I know,

but he’s a good kid

and he’ll survive.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

Your boyfriend and I

never got to meet

but your smiles

meant everything to me.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

We’ll never again grab ice cream

or watch movies all afternoon.

I won’t have the chance

to see you in a white dress.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

You won’t ever have children

for me to love as my own,

nor will I ever again

receive one of your hugs.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

I thought you’d stolen my spot

when I was away from school

but instead you just added a new spot

and became my friend.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

You knew what to say

when I was falling apart

calling my marks my gills

before they even scarred.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

I made a point to visit

at least once a year

I wish I could have been there

more this past year.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

Eleven months since I saw you

or heard you laugh.

Eleven months and now

you’re past away.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

It was supposed to be treatable,

take a year of your life,

but ultimately be beatable.

It took you away.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

I hope some day,

I will see you again,

but at least you died knowing

I really love you.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

Your parents will mourn

but even they will find smiles.

Your brother will love his life

even with you not by his side.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

It hurts us all a lot,

and pin isn’t a competition,

but while we may always hurt,

we will relearn to exist.

What do I do?

What do I say?

Will I ever

feel okay?

We will relearn how to smile,

and what makes us happy

if not just because we’ve grown used

to the pain then for you, my dear.

There’s nothing to do,

and nothing to say,

but someday in the future,

we’ll all be okay.

17 November 2022

[churrothezanyrabbit]

i’m glad it has a high survival rate but

my friend got diagnosed

with um

hodgkin’s lymphoma, a type of cancer

she starts treatment next week but god i’m so fucking scared for her i hope she okay and she will thrive through it

im genuinely sobbing

so yeah 👍

[dreamycloud1]

Hey guys, I don't want to be disruptive but I needed to put this out there. My youngest brother was diagnosed with lymphoma (cancer in the lymph nodes) in early December. He's only 11 so my parents have been taking off a lot of time at work to be with him and they're constantly going between the hospital and home. I know people see these posts all the time so I'll keep it short but any amount in donations would be so so so helpful. If you can't donate that's okay but a reblog or spreading it to friends outside tumblr even would be so appreciated. I just want to get this spread around. Thank you everyone.

[rollinsland]

⚠ Urgent ⚠ Long story under the cut TW cancer mention

Hey guys, thanks so much for reading this!  My name is Crissy. I'm 37 years old and in need of some assistance My older sister, younger brother, and I lost our sister recently due to lymphoma. Her and our younger brother are on disability, and my older sister and I are/were their caregivers  They (SSA) have not told us yet if my younger brother will be receiving any of her disability check as survivors benefits, so we're $500 short on rent and have no way to get that money

Our parents are deceased, so it's just us  If you can send anything our way so we can keep our home it would be greatly appreciated  The landlord is always late picking up the rent, but we have to tell him by the 5th of the month that we have it ready 

Please boost this and donate anything if you can  I know times are tough for everyone right now, so if you can afford to give anything or even just a boost, we are extremely grateful.  Have a great day and be safe in this hard and crazy world ♥♥♥ PayPal

*that's the only thing I have a card for to withdraw the money to give the landlord cash Can show death certificate and last months rent receipt, if you need proof of death and cost email is partychick.ch@gmail.com if link doesn't work