#look it probably varies from store to store
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foldingfittedsheets · 1 day ago
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Figured id ask since i dont know where to start otherwise (the local mattress store i dont like very much) and i never even thought about, why theres so many different kinds of pillows until you mentioned it. The pillow i use rn is lightly wool stuffed(self-stuffed), so when i lay on it, it goes down to about 2inches or so. Im usually a stomach sleeper and this works for me, but since its wool it gets matted and hard and lumpy inside really quickly, but i havent found any store bought pillows that work as well. Is there anything that comes to mind that you think might work/help?
You’re looking for a low pillow, probably around 4”. Your current one gets a D grade from me cause a pillows job is to stay a pillow and if you need to wake up and mash it back into shape it is failing.
Tragically preferences vary wildly and I can’t really pillow fit someone digitally.
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everysongineverykey · 7 months ago
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begging people to realize that the back warehouse of a grocery store is not a second, secret grocery store that has everything you need plus some extra secret items the first grocery store does not have
#look it probably varies from store to store#but at least where i work the back is a fucking mess.#like. you're imagining neat tidy shelves and specific sections for each product#that is not what the back is. it's a disorganized hellhole with every type of product piled haphazardly on top of each other#wheelers lying around with the most random items.#you have to understand that if a grocery worker were to 'check in the back' for something#it would likely take 10ish minutes if it WAS there.#and like. stuff like produce isn't just going to be kept in boxes in the back either. or meat or seafood.#if they have sellable meat or produce they're not just going to stick it in some deep freezer in the back#and wait for it to become two days away from unsellable before they bring it out.#with those departments especially if they have something you want it is going to be on display#and if it's not they don't have it.#stuff like soda is a bit easier to find usually#but even then there's so many different brands all piled together in crates on the same wheeler#not even opened#and i hate to say it but most grocery workers honestly just have more important things to do#than go rooting around like truffle pigs in the back for the stuff you want.#they might be doing price change or they might be stocking a new product#or they might be trying to fill a central display case#or they might be filling an online shopping order and thus on a time crunch#and even if none of those are the case a grocery worker can get called away to a different task on a dime.#they can't just drop everything to hunt in the back for whatever fucking granola bars you want so bad.#absolutely we can tell you where things are#and we can recommend alternatives to out of stock items. sure. but you'll only be wasting your time and ours#if you ask us to check for something in the back.
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readwritealldayallnight · 4 months ago
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Promises
Captain John Price x Reader
wc: 1.2k words
warnings/tags: fluff fluff fluff
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“You’ll check the doors? Windows as well, aye?”
“Yes, John. I’ll make sure they’re locked before bed.” You reassure the man, holding the phone between your cheek and shoulder as you do exactly that, tugging on the window latches to ensure they’re shut properly, walking past each door to spy the locks are in fact in place. “No one will be coming in and touching your cigars, I can assure you of that.”
“Hm. Got precious cargo I’m more concerned about these days, than cigars.” He quips back, playing into your attempt to lighten the situation. John hasn’t been gone on deployment for a full 24 hours yet and already he’s finding himself missing you more than he thought possible. He knew being apart from you was going to be difficult, especially considering that this mission was likely to take a few months rather than a few weeks, but he hadn’t anticipated struggling so early on.
“Don’t worry, I won’t let anyone touch your scotch either.” You say and he can just picture you adding a mischievous wink at the end. He finds himself suddenly wondering if he has any photos of you where you’re winking at him, and he feels regret creeping into his stomach at the realization that no, he probably doesn’t. Now he’s got nothing but his memory to rely on when he wants to imagine your playful expression.
It’s not as if John hadn’t made a point of taking more candid shots of you once he’d learned about how long this upcoming mission was to take. He wanted to have something tangible, something real he could wrap his fingers around, lay his weary gaze upon and be gifted with the sight of his beloved smiling back at him. And if a thick stack of Polaroids each adorned with varying expressions of your visage find themselves stuffed into the pocket of his tactical vest right above where his heart beats only for you, well then his men had best mind their business about it.
His last ditch effort to capture your beauty, to bring along with him a small fragment of the joy you bring to his life every day he spends by your side, had melted your heart thoroughly. It was sometimes hard to imagine your soft, loving teddy bear of a man, having to turn on his Captain persona and intimidate enemies on a battlefield. But then you’d hear him shouting at the television, going on about how some wanker was making a mockery of ‘The Price is Right’ (a show the two of you watched too often, if only so that John had more of an excuse to slip ‘well ya know, they do say Price is right, after all’ into arguments), or you’d catch him glaring at anyone he felt was looking at you the wrong way in public, and you couldn’t deny he was to be in a position of command.
“Don’t go answerin’ the door for anyone either, love. And make sure that the-”
“John, I’ll be okay. I promise, I’ll be careful.” You attempt to convince him before he spirals further. A man of action, John had been keeping busy in the time leading up to his departure. Trips to the hardware store to buy additional locks for the front door, jammers for the window panes, researching various brands of security systems, even going as far as speaking a little louder in the hallways outside your flat door, letting anyone who lived near enough know that a man lived here as well, not wanting anyone to know you’d be alone and vulnerable.
“I know, m’sorry to keep pestering you love.” The Captain sighs into the phone, running a hand down his phone before glancing back over his shoulder at the room. He knows he doesn’t have much more time to keep talking with you. Really, he shouldn’t have called at all, but John just couldn’t help himself. This is how he gets when it comes to you. Nothing else matters as much when it comes to you. And so yes, he admits he is being selfish by holding everyone else up in the briefing room as they wait for his return, but he doesn’t know when he’ll get to hear your voice again, and what’s the point of being Captain if you can’t pull strings when they matter? “Just wanna know you’ll be safe.”
“Now why do I feel as though I should be the one asking you that question, hm?” Your question brings a soft smile to his face. God, he misses you so much already. “You made it to- wherever you are- alright?”
“I did.” He confirms, casting another glance across the room. He can see them loading up trucks with supplies as you speak. He hates that he can’t ever tell you where he is. Can’t tell you that this base is just one of countless destinations where he’ll sleep in a bed that feels too empty without you by his side. Can’t tell you that each meal portion he eats tastes blander without you sitting across from him. “Though we’re not stayin’ here long. Flyin’ out early again in the mornin’.”
“Hm.” You hum along in response, knowing he can’t give you details, satisfied with any bit of information he can offer you in its place. “You promise me, you’ll be safe John Price. I don’t like those stories of Gaz falling out of helicopters.”
“Well then, it’s a good thing that’s the only story I’m ever lettin’ him tell you.” John can’t help but to laugh along with you, before falling more serious again, knowing he’ll have to hang up soon and leave you. “Trust me love. You don’t need to be worrying your pretty little head over me. There isn’t anythin’ that could keep me from comin’ home to you. Nothin’.”
His declaration has tears threatening to sting the corners of your eyes, treasuring this moment with him, even an unknown distance apart, knowing it’ll be some time until you can speak again. You can hear the background noise of wherever he is increasing in volume. You overhear someone shout his name, no doubt looking for him. You know your time is up for now, and that you’ll have to be the one to bite the bullet. He’s never the first one to hang up the phone with you, and this time is no different.
“I love you John. So much. I’ll see you soon.” You whisper into the receiver, hoping he can feel the love you speak into each word meant only for him.
“I love you, angel. So much. Be back before you know it.” He says, waiting to hear the ‘click’ on the other side of the line before stuffing his phone back into his slacks.
It’s true, what he said to you. There truly isn’t anything, so long as he can help it, that will keep him from coming back home to you. Not when he’s made a promise to do exactly that. Not when he’s got a small box stuffed into three pairs of socks hiding in his underwear drawer in your flat, hiding a shiny little ring he’s been holding on to since your second date. Not when he intends to make his biggest promise to you yet as soon as he’s home and holding you in his arms again, where you belong.
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anyroads · 3 months ago
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✨🪡Leather thimbles!🪡✨
Please enjoy this shitshow of a promo image I made so that I can tell you that holiday sales are now open
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These leather thimbles and also other ones of varying colors and leather types are available in my Etsy store. I also do custom sizing, if you click on the listing that says "bespoke."
(Also this is not relevant to this post at all but look at the gorgeous antique Singer I refurbished myself isn't she preeeeetty? I love her. I hung thimbles on her because irony is edgy.)
Every mail service has been ehhhhhhhh during the holidays the last couple of years so get your orders in early! I'm shipping within 1-3 days right now just in case, but these are made to order so just like, be aware of that.
And because I love y'all Tumblrinas so much I have a special Tumblr discount code for 10% off: enter the code D3VILSS4CRAM3NT at checkout and get a surprise!
(it's 10% off. That's it. It's not really a surprise because I just said it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
Here is the link to the Etsy store:
Here are nice things people have said about the leather thimbles I make from repurposed leather offcuts that are sustainable and comfortable and also aesthetically pleasing:
✨"fits perfectly and is of good quality. would recommend."✨
✨"matches the pictures and description"✨
✨"❤️❤️❤️"✨
And you know what, I'm going to share my two favorite ones too:
This one was in a message a customer sent me that legit made me cry:
"I know this little guy will last me a few years at least. These are simple but mighty. They are so sturdy I could shove a thick needle through 2 layers of fabric without a problem. It is so comfortable that I have worn them without knowing while cooking, eating, and probably gone outside with it (I can’t remember).  Thank you for doing what you do."
Oh and there was this very nice one from ✨BERNADETTE BANNER✨:
✨✨✨"I cherish them"✨✨✨
No joke, it was in one of her videos:
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OK that's it, enjoy the holidays and thank you for boosting this post if you did!
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pressureplus · 6 months ago
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Sebastian Solace Injury Headcannons
Warnings: Mentions of blood, anxiety, and Injury, but nothing too particularly graphic, You show up at his shop hurt and he takes care of you
(The way he cares for your injuries slightly varies depending on your relationship)
◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟
Platonic
• Immediately starts to chastise you the second he can smell the blood on you
• He doesn't have a nose, so how he scrunches it up is beyond you
• Your med kit isn't free, so you definitely owe him and yes, he will remember you owe him
• You can't refuse tho, he's already patching you up before you can really do anything about it
• What are you gonna do, fight him? Fight a thing more than 5 times your size with claws like steel knives? I don't think so.
• He's pretty good at patching wounds, and stays relaxed the whole time he's doing it
• The motions are practiced and easy as he cleans and gauzes and wraps you up
• "Because I pity you, I'll even let you lay on the cot in the corner of my shop, hmm?"
• Understands you are useless and stupid and small, so he guesses he can help you out and demand whatever extra data you have I'm your pockets about a week from now
• He isn't exactly the most concerned with your well-being, but does go out of his way to help you and take care of you sooo...
• You must mean something to him right?
If you're not together but he likes you
• Actually gets a little worried
• He flusters easily, the crush he has for you making it a little bit more difficult for him to think clearly
• That crush making his harsh reactions harsher and his soft ones hard to verbalize
• He grabs you
• I don't have any other way to put this, he literally just reaches out and grabs you before he really thinks about it
• You don't get an explanation, you don't get scolding, he just huffs and gets pissy while he's patching you
• "I thought you were better than this- You REALLY ended up this hurt over something so easy to get away from?"
• Yes, he knows the foul mouth he's got is tanking his chances of ever actually being with you, but he already figures you're never going to want to kiss a fish so why should he care?
• Even if rejection is imminent and unavoidable, and even if he feels the constant need to be mean to you so he can protect himself, he'll still take care of you
• He does like you for a reason- a lot of reasons. And he thinks about those reasons quite a bit... Of course he wants you to be okay
• You're his favorite person, and he would rather die than admit that but also would 100% prioritize your medical care over working his shop
• Him being so fast to grab and tend to your wounds is probably one of the only things you've ever seen from him that's made you sure he doesn't hate you
• Look, there's no way this man would be smoothing his thumb over your newly applied bandages and looking upset at the notion you'd be hurt without you being SOME kind of important
• It doesn't matter how stupid you are, dummy or not, this shit is painfully obvious when he's getting vulnerable over the idea of you getting a nasty enough scar
• Will not let you leave the cot in the room until you're all better, so get ready to be defensively degraded by your favourite shopkeeper for several consecutive days!
If you are together
• Open. Meltdown.
• Panicking, throwing the door on his little store closed and coddling you like you'll fall apart if he's not treating you with the utmost care
• Even scraped knees and bumped elbows get treated like they need full medical, so you can imagine the sort of reactions you're getting to actually bleeding
• Part of him immediately blames himself while he's frantically tending to your injuries, thinking he should have watched you better today, thinking that he should have protected you right
• The next part of him promises he'll be getting whoever or whatever did this to you back for it just as soon as you're all mended and comforted
• He's a mess, a muttering, coddling mess
• You get little kisses to the bandages, as well as some quiet murmurs that attempt to get onto you for not being careful
• The grip you've got around this man's heart is too much for him to be angry, nor pretend to
• You may nearly make him cry if it's bad enough, and his hands may shake at the sight of you so hurt
• Will threaten you if you even THINK about dying, remember he can do worse to you and will if you don't shut up, he can't cope with thinking about losing you shut up shut up shut up-
• Until you're healed, you aren't leaving his bed. He puts you in HIS bed and cuddles up to you any chance that he gets
• You're going to get teased when you're all better and his brain registers it's not a big deal, but until then this is your big, protective fishy husband whether you two have gotten married officially or not
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justadeadreaper · 7 months ago
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These are mainly fluffy headcanons with slight themes of angst due to the nature of long deployments with implications/references of a death that could happen.
One thing people tend to forget about König working for a private military company is that he can still go on long deployments/missions that can take months to even years to complete where he would not be able to see his beloved.
König may be an extremely cocky man, which is something no one can deny from his voice lines. On the surface level he may think that no other person is skilled enough to kill him, but deep down that is not the case. Even if his anxiety does not actively affect him on a level you would truly notice it is still rooted deep in his brain as it spews out harrowing ideas that he can not get rid of as they nip at him while being made bigger by his trauma and past experiences. This causes a deep-seated paranoia about the idea of him dying on the field and leaving you all alone with your last memory of him being a sad one haunts him, or even worse in his time gone you completely forget about him and move on to someone new that could fill the hole he left behind.
This leads him to make the day before his long deployment the best of your life while he puts together a surprise to ensure you always have pieces of him while he is apart from you.
The day before he makes sure you have the best date of your life so far. It first starts with breakfast in your shared bed after he lets you sleep in until late in the morning, it is all your favourite breakfast foods and some of his own as he lets you splurge a bit and have your favourite dessert items as well while he eats his waffles with pistachio and strawberry ice cream. He loves to cuddle you and just stay in bed with you for a couple more hours to bathe in your love and warmth as you brush your hands through his hair before massaging his scalp before gently kissing all over his face, paying special attention to his scars. Once you finally get out of bed he takes you on a little shopping spree through your favourite stores letting you buy anything you want without worrying about the price even if you have to go to the sketchy game place that smells of death and sweat so he can get more figures or knives or guns or mangas for his collection. To end your adventure he would either take you to an aquarium or museum of your choice later in the evening so that fewer people are there just so you could have your moment together that looks like it is straight out of a movie. Before you leave you drag him towards the gift shop and he buys you whatever gifts you want  then he takes you home as he secretly calls your favourite takeout place so you can eat it together once it arrives as another surprise. Then to finish the day you spend the whole night cuddling and watching movies until you fall asleep. 
On a more spicy note, if you want children and do not have any yet I can see him trying his best to get you pregnant that night as he feels and loves you one last time just so if you lose him you will at least still have a part of him with you to help you pass through the years before you are reunited again.
In the morning he probably leaves with no word to you at all as he would hate your last memory to be one of heartbreak. Only a letter on his side of the bed. The first few pages are him apologising for leaving without a goodbye with the explanation that he is going on a long deployment before detailing how much he loves you, then he explains how he took a few of your shirts to use as a mask so he could always have your smell with him as he battles and a photo of you that he keeps above his heart so you can still be close to him, and finally on the last few pages are a detailed scavenger hunt with clues that lead you all over your shared homes with each clue leading to a spot with the clue being based on an important memory that was in that spot.
The items he would put in these spots varied and each time changed (unless it was his last time) but it was always the same types of items every time even if the spots changed.
In the first spot would always be some of his shirts, jackets, or hoodies that smelled of him so that when you were around the house you could wear them and be comforted by his scent as they would always smell heavily of his cologne. Every time after the first time he did this he would put different clothes in his place so you never got bored of the options he chose.
In the second spot would be a mixture of letters and USB sticks. There would be a letter on top explaining that the letters with white lily petals on the front and USBs with white lilies painted on them were for if he died, they have a gold writing on top that labels which life event of yours it was for and if you had children they would have the same and even if you did not have kids yet he still made some for future potential children, and the letters with forget-me-not petals on the front and USBs with forget-me-nots painted on them were for when you missed in and were struggling to deal with your life and different emotions without him there, and USBs with pink carnations painted on them that were just recorded videos him talking about different topics just for when you wanted to hear his voice talking about topics he found interesting. He explains in the top letter that the reason he wrote the letters and recorded videos that he put on the USB was due to the fact that in the letters he had to be concise and direct so he could get to everything he wanted to say while the videos are for him to be able to express all his emotions and not be confined to what would fit on the page as you see him be himself in the photos. Every time after the first time he did this he would put new letters and USBs in the place of the old ones to add to the collection with new responses to situations, topics, and emotions he thought of.
In the third spot would be a bear from Build-A-Bear (specifically the Pumpkin Sparkle bear due to it being ginger like him) that has multiple voice boxes in it that has recordings of him saying “I love you” or different compliments or nicknames he would usually call you with a custom heart too that bumped in the rhythm of his heart. The bear would be dressed up in a mini version of his normal uniform he wears on contracts as it holds a bottle of his favourite cologne just for you to use. Every time after the first time he did this he would put new clothes you could dress the bear up in based on his other outfits he wears on his contracts or at home or from when he dragged you to conventions.
In the fourth spot would be a scrapbook of your life together next to the small journals he took on deployments or used when his insomnia overwhelmed him which made it impossible to sleep. The scrapbook would have photos of all your dates together and important dates such as birthdays, promotions, holidays, etc. with petals and small drawings decorating the pages while the journals would be filled with countless pages filled with drawings of you, poems directed towards you or wrote solely about you, and ramblings about how he felt about you and everything he adored about you. Every time after the first time he did this he would create new scrapbooks that could be paired with the old that shows off more of your life events together and more journals that are filled to the brim with you.
In the fifth spot would be two books he made himself, the first is a cookbook bursting at the seams where he has handwritten all of the recipes that have been passed down his family over generations upon generations but alongside it are also recipes of all the dishes you enjoyed together or recipes he knew you loved even if you had never had the time to share them together, while the second is a book of all the jokes and puns he has told you or he wanted to tell you or he wanted to use when he was finally a dad or the kids were old enough to understand. Every time after the first time he did this he would write down new pages of jokes or recipes that he thought of that could be added to the books.
Apart from the scavenger hunt I also imagine him doing other things for when he is gone. The second most prominent thing is the little glass animals that he has hidden all around the house with a tiny scroll wrapped around their body or neck with a cute ribbon that matches the colour of the animal to keep it attached; once the scroll is unrolled it reveals it is a note about how much he loves you and how beautiful you are or compliments in general or motivation just so you can be reminded everyday of how much he loves you as if he never left, like he was still there with you. Something that could be considered as condescending that comes from his cockiness, and the undiagnosed autism I think he has, is how he writes down instructions and reminders for everyday he is on deployment for you to use as normally each morning he writes a chore list for the day with reminders for both of you to eat and drink. If you showed him how an Alexa worked he sets up the Alexa to do the reminders too but for the next 30 years just in case he dies.
When he is on deployment he will try to send back letters at any opportunity he gets as he collects trinkets to give you once he gets home. If you did have cameras set up around the house, whenever he has free time he is watching them to see how you are and what you are doing, and you can bet that if a speaker and microphone is attached to the camera he is using it to talk and have conversations with you even if they are short due to the nature of his work.
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clonerightsagenda · 8 months ago
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Thank you for applying for a library card!
We are a large metropolitan library with twelve branches here in the city and a consortial agreement with ninety-seven different timelines (and counting). Your card is your ticket to our physical and digital collections, where we have something for everyone.
You’ve indicated that you are licensed for time travel and regularly travel in time or between timelines for work purposes, so you are eligible for our trans-timeline borrower’s card. Please read this document carefully to ensure you’re using your new card to its fullest potential and in compliance with library policy.
Our services:
The library has a floating collection, meaning items remain at the branch where they were returned rather than being sent back to the lending branch. However, we do return inter-timeline loans to their home universe to minimize temporal strain. If you’re browsing the shelves and see a book phasing in and out of existence, alert an employee. It’s probably misshelved.  
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You asked, and we listened. Our new online catalog displays reviews from patrons from all relevant timelines on items exceeding a 90% similarity score. We request that patrons keep debates over the superiority of their timeline’s version to venues other than our catalog.
Although our staff members are not medical professionals, they have been trained to recognize signs of temporal instability. If you are experiencing characteristic symptoms (faintness, disorientation, physical and/or mental age changes, etc.), a staff member can administer grounding agents until emergency services arrive.
The library has a robust inter-timeline loan system. If you’re looking for a book or article not published in this timeline, fill out our online form or ask at the circulation desk. The average wait time for an ITL request is five business days. That’s shortened to three if you’re requesting an item stored at the James Patterson Interdimensional Warehouse. (Note: This estimate may change as the warehouse continues to expand under its own power, or if our courier gets lost there.)
Our policies:
We do not accept returns before the publication date (month and year). Cataloging books paradoxically created through stable time loops gets too complicated. You can check a book’s month of publication in a review journal like Booklist, which we make available online and in our non-circulating magazine collection.
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If a book is damaged beyond repair, lost in a Time Hole, or overwritten out of existence by timeline changes, you will be responsible for the replacement cost or a flat fee of $30, whichever is lower. We do not recommend attempting to rewrite time to avoid losing or damaging the book, as we would prefer to purchase a new copy rather than tear a hole in the fabric of reality.
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The library respects the personhood and autonomy of patrons no matter their timeline of origin. However, this respect is not always universal. If you need to know what the laws are for time travelers/alternate selves/dimension-hoppers/“timeclones”/etc. in this dimension (or the terminology used to refer to them), stop by the reference desk.
Violence is against library policy. If you are about to battle your alternate self from another timeline because you ran into each other in the cookbook section, take it to the parking lot.
In conclusion:
Libraries are committed to free access to information, and with the resources of dozens of timelines available to us, our mission has only gotten bigger. In fact, we’re hiring! If you’re looking for somewhere new to apply your time travel certification, we’re looking for team members in our inter-timeline loan department. Entry-level courier positions do not require an MLIS. Familiarity with James Patterson is a plus.
We can’t wait to see you in our library. (Maybe we already have.)  
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mssalo · 4 months ago
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safety - Part: III
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Summary: After years of isolation, Joel Miller's life revolves around control and keeping danger at bay, his past as a soldier leaving him constantly on edge. But when a sweet, soft-spoken young woman starts working at the supply store, her innocence stirs something inside him. Despite his efforts to remain detached, Joel becomes obsessed with keeping her safe from the dangers he’s certain are lurking everywhere.
As his protective instincts morph into darker desires, the lines between safeguarding her and possessing her begin to blur.
Warnings will vary by chapter depending on the content.
Warnings: Dark!Joel, 18+ MDNI, Obsession themes, Stalking, Panic episode/Paranoia, Joel has major Trauma/PTSD, he sees stuff that isn't there, Mentions of war and combat-related trauma, Emotional manipulation, Power dynamics, Noncon/dubcon elements, Unstable mental state, Reader feeling conflicted. Joel needs a hug and therapy. As per usual.
10k
Enjoy!
Part I Part II Part IV Part V
· · ───────────𖥸──────────· ··
The soft afternoon sun filtered through your curtains as you did one last sweep of your small apartment, making sure everything was in place before heading out.
Your camping gear—neatly packed and checked twice—sat by the door, ready for another adventure.
This one felt different, though.
Maybe it was because you’d never gone so far out, or maybe because the spot had been suggested by Joel, the rugged, quiet man who came by at the supply store.
The thought of him made your stomach do a tiny flip, and you smiled to yourself, biting your lip.
Joel.
He was... intense, that was for sure.
Handsome in a way that took you by surprise—older, gruff, with that scruff on his jawline and those eyes that seemed to see right through you.
He’d been kind of closed off whenever you tried to talk to him, always giving short answers, but there was something about the way he looked at you.
You shook your head, grabbing your bag. Don’t get carried away.
Sure, he looked at you sometimes, his gaze lingering just a second longer than necessary, but that didn’t mean anything.
You were probably imagining it. After all, he was always so reserved, so hard to read.
And you? Well, you were... you.
He probably thinks I’m just a kid, you thought with a small sigh.
Cute, maybe, but nothing more.
You laughed at yourself, shaking your head as the trees closed in around you.
Stop it. Focus on the trip.
You weren’t here to daydream about handsome older men—you were here to camp, to prove to yourself that you could handle this on your own.
He was just... nice, in his own way. That was all.
You couldn’t help but smile as you tossed your gear into the backseat and slid behind the wheel, already feeling the excitement buzzing in your chest.
The open road stretched ahead of you, leading to the spot Joel had mentioned—someplace out past the ridge, quiet and secluded. It sounded like heaven.
The drive was peaceful, your fingers tapping the steering wheel as the scenery shifted from city to countryside.
The trees seemed to grow taller as you left the main roads behind, the air turning cooler and cleaner with every passing mile. You loved this—the sense of leaving the noise behind, of stepping into a world that was all your own. Out here, you could breathe.
The road eventually narrowed into a dirt path, and your car rumbled over the uneven ground as you followed the directions Joel had given you.
The sunlight flickered through the dense canopy above, casting dappled shadows on the forest floor.
It was beautiful out here—quiet, untouched, with the kind of peace you could only find miles away from anyone else.
When you finally pulled into the small clearing, you felt your breath catch in your throat. Wow.
The space was perfect.
The trees formed a natural border around the clearing, their branches swaying gently in the breeze. The ground was soft with pine needles, and the air smelled fresh and earthy, with just a hint of woodsmoke from somewhere far off.
You stepped out of the car, your boots crunching on the ground, and for a moment, you just stood there, taking it all in.
This is exactly what I needed.
You popped the trunk of your car, the warm breeze rustling through the trees as you grabbed your backpack and gear.
The sun was beginning to sink lower in the sky, casting a golden glow across the clearing, but you had plenty of time to set everything up before dusk settled in.
With a smile tugging at your lips, you slung the pack over your shoulder and took a deep breath of the crisp, earthy air.
It smelled like pine and moss, with just a hint of the nearby sea.
Perfect.
First things first—the tent.
You dropped your backpack onto the ground and knelt beside it, unzipping the side pocket where you’d stashed the tent poles.
Your fingers brushed over the cool metal, and you couldn’t help but chuckle to yourself as you pulled them out.
These damn poles always give me trouble.
You spread the tent fabric over the grassy spot you’d chosen, carefully laying it flat and adjusting the corners.
The fabric crinkled under your touch, the sound almost lost in the hum of the wind and distant birdsong. The air was still, quiet, as if the forest itself was holding its breath while you worked.
With a determined sigh, you grabbed the poles and got to work.
The metal clinked softly as you tried to fit the pieces together, but as usual, they resisted you. You grumbled under your breath, fumbling with the last stubborn connection.
After a few minutes of struggling and a minor battle with the pole that just wouldn’t line up right, you finally secured the tent frame, the fabric puffing up as it took shape.
Not bad, you thought with a satisfied grin, stepping back to admire your handiwork.
The tent stood proudly in the clearing, and you wiped a bit of dirt off your hands, brushing them against your jeans.
You weren’t done yet, though.
With the tent in place, you moved on to your cooking supplies. You pulled out your small camp stove, some pots, and a few basic utensils, setting them neatly near the fire pit.
Everything had a place, and you liked knowing where everything was. Organization was important to you—it gave you a sense of control, made you feel prepared for anything.
It was comforting, like you were creating a little slice of order in the middle of the wilderness.
As you set down your cooking gear, your gaze flicked up toward the treeline, where you could just make out the glimmer of the sea through the trees.
The light reflected off the water like tiny diamonds, and you felt a pull in your chest, a desire to sink into that cool water after all your hard work.
Soon, you thought, grinning to yourself.
Just a little longer.
You double-checked your setup, making sure everything was where it needed to be.
The tent was secure, the cooking supplies organized, and the fire pit was ready for later. With everything in place, a sense of accomplishment washed over you.
The silence of the clearing felt peaceful, almost sacred, as if this place had been waiting just for you.
You took another deep breath, letting the air fill your lungs, and as you exhaled, you felt lighter, freer.
It was just you and the wilderness now, the weight of the world falling away. And with that thought, you couldn’t resist any longer.
You straightened up, glanced back at the sea shimmering in the distance, and a surge of excitement bubbled up inside you.
Without thinking, you raised your arms toward the sky and let out a loud, joyful, “Wooooohooo!”
Your voice echoed through the trees, the sound dancing on the wind.
You couldn’t help but laugh as the echoes faded, your heart pounding with exhilaration.
It was a small victory, this moment—being here, in this beautiful place, by yourself.
“Thank you, Joel!” you called out, a grin stretching across your face.
You weren’t sure if you were talking to the wind or to yourself, but it didn’t matter.
He wasn’t here, but somehow, it felt right to thank him.
After all, he had recommended this place, and you couldn’t be more grateful for the suggestion. You stood there for a moment longer, letting the silence settle in again.
Then, with a smile still tugging at your lips, you turned toward the path that led to the sea.
It was time to reward yourself with a swim, to feel the water against your skin, cool and refreshing.
This is going to be a good trip.
And who knows? you thought, maybe I’ll come back and tell Joel all about it.
· · ──────
Joel had been watching her since she arrived, hidden in the treeline, his gaze sharp and steady. His truck was parked a ways back, well out of sight.
He’d walked the rest of the way, making sure to stay quiet as he moved through the brush, his boots silent against the earth.
He was always careful—old habits from his time in the military never died, and neither did his instinct to remain unseen.
Joel watched her step out, wide-eyed and eager, like she hadn’t the faintest clue about the dangers lurking in a place like this. Even though he’d told her where to come, seeing her here alone had set him on edge.
He had to protect her. Make sure she was safe.
She started setting up her camp, fumbling with the tent poles like he expected she would.
His lips twitched in amusement as she muttered to herself, the poles giving her more trouble than they had any right to.
He watched her struggle, clumsy but determined, and despite himself, he felt his chest tighten again, that same damn feeling that had been gnawing at him for weeks.
He shouldn’t be here, shouldn’t be watching her like this, but the more he told himself that, the more his feet stayed planted. He crossed his arms over his chest, leaning against a tree as he kept his eyes on her.
She was smart—he could see it in the way she double-checked everything, making sure the tent was secure, the cooking gear laid out just so.
She wasn’t careless, not exactly. Just… naive.
Still, something about her innocence, her softness, drew him in, despite his better judgment.
As she finished up, he was about to move, maybe head back to his truck and give her some space, but then she did something that made him freeze.
She raised her arms to the sky, her voice bursting out of her in a loud, joyful, “Woooohooo!”
Joel tensed, his instincts flaring, his hand instinctively hovering near his belt. The sound had startled him, snapping him into high alert.
He scanned the area, eyes narrowing, but there was nothing.
Just her. Alone. Safe.
Relief washed over him, but then he felt something else—a strange amusement creeping in.
She wasn’t screaming out of fear. No, she was celebrating, shouting into the empty wilderness like it was hers to claim.
She laughed, carefree and so full of life that it almost… unsettled him. His chest loosened, and before he could stop himself, a low chuckle rumbled deep in his throat.
She had no idea he was there, no idea how close he was.
Then, to his complete surprise, she threw her head back and shouted, “Thank you, Joel!”
Joel’s eyebrows shot up, the words hanging in the air between them, the sound of her voice almost too sweet.
His grip on his belt relaxed, his pulse slowing as he realized she was… thanking him.
For this. For bringing her here.
His amusement deepened, and he couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth. A soft breeze rustled through the trees, and Joel leaned forward slightly, his voice a low murmur as he whispered under his breath,
“You’re very welcome, sweetheart.”
He watched her for a moment longer, her happiness infectious despite himself. She was something different, that much he knew. Something soft in a world that had long since hardened him.
And as much as he knew he should leave her alone, he couldn’t. He wouldn’t.
Not now.
Not when she was out here, completely unaware of the dangers that could surround her at any moment. Because that’s what he was here for, wasn’t it?
To keep her safe. To make sure nothing happened to her.
Joel watched her from the shadows, still on high alert as she busied herself around the campsite. His amusement had faded, replaced by that familiar tension coiling in his chest, the constant need to keep her safe gnawing at him.
It didn't sit right with him, her being out here all alone.
She had no idea what kind of dangers lurked out in the woods, no clue just how vulnerable she was. He clenched his fists, eyes narrowing as he kept his distance.
She was endearing, sure.
Sweet, even.
But that sweetness was going to get her killed if she wasn't careful. And as much as he wanted to keep his distance, to leave her be, he couldn't. She needs to be protected, he thought, his jaw tightening.
She doesn't even realize how easy of a target she is.
He kept his eyes on her, watching every movement with a careful precision. It wasn't just about keeping her safe from wild animals or the natural dangers of the wilderness.
People-men-could show up.
She was vulnerable in more ways than one, and Joel knew just how ruthless the world could be. His mind was spiraling again, his paranoia threatening to take over, when he saw her heading toward the small lake just beyond the campsite.
His eyes followed her, every muscle in his body tensing as he realized what she was doing.
She was undressing.
Joel's breath caught in his throat as he watched her pull her shirt over her head, her soft skin catching the light of the fading sun.
His mind screamed at him to look away, to respect her privacy, but his body betrayed him, his eyes glued to her every movement.
She dropped her shorts next, standing there in nothing but her underwear, the curve of her waist and hips on full display.
Joel's chest tightened, that familiar, unwanted heat rising inside him. He swallowed hard, his grip on the tree next to him tightening.
All the blood rushing to his cock.
But then she did something that made his blood boil.
With one fluid motion, she unclasped her bra, letting it tall to the ground.
His eyes locked onto the bare skin of her back, the soft curves of her body now fully exposed. She bent down, slipping out of her underwear, her entire form now vulnerable and exposed to the world.
What the hell is she doing?
A surge of anger flared up inside him. She was defenseless, naked, out in the open with no protection.
If anything-anyone-were to show up, she wouldn't stand a chance.
His mind raced with worst-case scenarios, the kind of things he'd seen during the war, the kind of things that made his skin crawl.
She's making herself a damn target.
Joel's jaw clenched, his fists tightening as he took a step forward, every instinct screaming at him to go to her, to tell her to put her damn clothes back on, to stop being so careless.
But then he froze.
His eyes swept over her again, this time with less anger and more... something else. The tension in his chest shifted, the fire in his veins cooling to a slow burn as he watched her step into the water, her body moving with a grace he hadn't noticed before.
Her bare skin glistened in the fading light, soft and smooth, the curves of her hips and the lines of her back almost too perfect.
She moved so effortlessly, her body swaying gently as she waded into the water, unaware of the eyes on her.
Joel's breath came out in slow, uneven bursts as he watched her. His anger faded, replaced by a twisted sense of admiration.
She was beautiful-there was no denying that. Her body was soft, untouched by the harshness of the world. His eyes traced the curve of her waist, the way her plump ass shifted as she walked deeper into the water.
Joel's chest rose and fell, his breathing heavy as he watched her.
His hand twitched at his side, his mind warring between the desire to protect her and the desire to... take her.
Take her - right here, right now on the forest floor.
His gaze followed the curve of her back, the way her hair floated around her in the water.
She was so oblivious, so innocent, completely unaware of the dangers around her.
And that was what enraged him—the recklessness, the vulnerability.
She had no idea how exposed she was, not just to the world but to him. The thought gnawed at him, tearing at the edges of his resolve.
He should have been disgusted with himself for standing there, hidden in the shadows, watching her like this. But the desire twisted deep inside him, growing stronger the longer he stared.
Joel swallowed hard, his throat dry, as his eyes roamed lower, taking in every inch of her.
The tightness in his jeans was almost painful, his cock pressing hard against the denim, aching in a way that made his breath catch in his throat.
The war inside him raged on.
His mind wavered between the desperate need to protect her and the darker, more primal urge he had no right to feel. He wanted to shield her from the world, from the dangers lurking just beyond the trees.
But at the same time, he wanted to take her in all ways possible, to claim her as his. To fuck into her small body. To make her understand just how much she needed him.
No. Stop.
Joel leaned against the tree, his knuckles white as he fought to steady his breath.
His breath hitched as she resurfaced, water cascading down her bare skin like liquid silver.
The way the sunlight danced across her damp figure, catching on every curve and hollow, made her look almost unreal—like something ethereal, pulled straight from a dream.
Her skin shimmered in the fading light, her hair slicked back, clinging to her neck and shoulders in wet strands that only accentuated the softness of her features.
She didn’t belong out here.
She looked too delicate, too pure for the wildness surrounding her.
The contrast between the untamed wilderness and her serene, almost angelic form sent a shiver down his spine.
She was grace in motion, completely unaware of how vulnerable she was.
Each movement she made, each ripple in the water as she waded further in, was almost hypnotic, drawing him in deeper.
He had seen a lot in his life—too much.
The ugliness of the world had hardened him, left him numb to the softness it still had to offer.
But now, watching her, something in him cracked.
It wasn’t just the lust. It was something else.
Something about the way she seemed to glow in the dying light, so peaceful, so unburdened by the weight of the world.
She was everything he wasn't—everything he’d lost a long time ago. Ethereal, untouchable, and yet here she was, right in front of him.
Joel felt the pull again, that urge to protect her, to shield her from the darkness that had consumed so much of his life. But more than that, he wanted to keep her for himself, to have her softness against all his rough edges.
And in that moment, he realized, there was no going back.
Joel's jaw clenched as she started to wade back toward the shore, the water slipping down her body, revealing more of her as she emerged. The way the droplets glistened on her skin, made it impossible for him to tear his eyes away.
His pulse quickened, the primal urge to keep watching nearly overwhelming him.
But then, Joel forced himself to look away.
Not yet.
His fists tightened at his sides, nails digging into his palms.
He wanted to see her fully, to drink in every inch of her-but not like this.
In due time.
The thought stirred something deep inside him, the hunger gnawing at him even more fiercely.
He swallowed hard, his breath coming in shallow, uneven pulls.
Joel exhaled slowly, forcing himself to calm down, forcing his gaze back to the safety of the trees.
· · ────
The sun had finally dipped behind the trees, casting long shadows across your camp.
You moved around with a sense of contentment, the cool evening air wrapping around you like a comforting blanket.
Everything felt peaceful—the kind of peace that you didn’t often get to experience in your daily life.
You set about lighting the small lantern, but as you reached for your flashlight to help navigate the growing darkness, a frown crossed your face.
“Where is it…?” you muttered, going through your bag again.
You checked each pocket carefully, but no flashlight.
You’d been so sure you packed it.
With a sigh, you knelt to check your gear one more time, shaking your head at your forgetfulness.
But then, there it was.
Sitting right in front of the tent flap, the flashlight gleamed in the soft light of the lantern, as if it had been there all along.
You blinked, rubbing your eyes in confusion.
“I swear that wasn’t there before,” you whispered to yourself.
It didn’t make sense.
You hadn’t seen it when you set up the tent, and you definitely would’ve noticed it while sorting through your gear. But after a moment of hesitation, you shrugged and picked it up, flicking it on to make sure it worked.
The beam cut through the growing twilight, casting long, gentle shadows over the campsite.
You felt a little silly for doubting yourself.
Maybe you were just distracted—too caught up in the excitement of the trip.
“Good job, brain,” you muttered with a grin, brushing off the strangeness as you moved on.
As you dug through your pack to prepare for dinner, your hand paused mid-search. You realized something else was missing.
Your lighter.
“Oh, come on,” you groaned, slumping your shoulders in frustration.
This was supposed to be the easy part.
You sat back on your heels, glancing around camp, trying to figure out where you might have left it.
But before you could even get up to start looking, something caught your eye.
A lighter.
Sitting near the fire pit.
You squinted, taking a step closer. It wasn’t just any lighter.
It had a goofy design on it—bright colors with some sort of cartoon character.
You raised your eyebrows, picking it up and turning it over in your hand. The lighter had a ridiculous picture of a grinning, cartoonish frog on it, wearing sunglasses. Beneath it, the words “Coolest Camper Ever!” were printed in bold letters.
You burst out laughing, the absurdity of it breaking through your earlier frustration.
“What the heck?” you giggled, flicking the lighter on and watching the small flame flicker to life.
“Well, guess this’ll do,” you chuckled, tucking it into your pocket.
You had no idea where this thing came from—it certainly wasn’t yours—but it was too funny to care.
Besides, a free lighter was a free lighter.
You couldn’t shake the feeling of oddness, though. Finding the flashlight and then this strange lighter? Maybe you were just a bit more scattered than usual, but still… it was weird.
You shook it off, letting the humor of the situation lighten your mood as you went back to your tasks.
· · ────
Joel moved like a shadow through the trees, his steps soundless on the forest floor. Years of survival had taught him how to blend into the background, how to become invisible when needed.
This wasn’t his first time sneaking up on someone—far from it—but something about doing it now, with her, made his chest tighten.
It wasn’t the same as before.
No enemy patrols, no immediate danger. But there was a weight to this, a tension that hadn’t been there for years. He was on edge, his senses heightened, every muscle in his body coiled like a spring.
She hadn’t noticed him yet. Not once.
That fact gnawed at him, frustration bubbling under the surface. She was so damn easy to watch, so completely unaware of the world around her.
It bothered him how vulnerable she was, how easily someone could sneak up on her like this.
Like he was doing.
But that's different.
As he moved closer, crouched low among the trees, he caught sight of her bent over her bag, her back to him as she searched for something.
nice view.
Joel quickly dismissed the thought.
He narrowed his eyes, watching her every move, assessing the scene like he had a hundred times before in far more dangerous situations.She was clumsy, fumbling with her things, but she didn’t seem to care.
Didn’t seem to realize how exposed she was.
Joel moved closer, his heart beating steadily in his chest, the thrill of sneaking up on her stirring something dark inside him. He reached into his bag, picking up the flashlight with ease, his rough fingers brushing against the cool metal.
He considered leaving it there for her to find but decided against it. She didn’t deserve to fumble around in the dark. Not on his watch.
Instead, he stepped toward the front of her tent, staying just out of her line of sight.
He placed the flashlight down carefully, making sure it was in a spot where she’d see it right away.
Then, he stepped back, blending into the shadows, watching her from his cover.
The satisfaction he felt when she spotted the flashlight was immediate, that small spark of pleasure flaring up in his chest as she picked it up, her face lighting up with a smile.
She thought she’d just found it by chance, like it was some kind of lucky accident.
Joel’s chest tightened at the sight of her, the tension in his muscles easing for a moment as he watched her laugh softly, holding the flashlight like a prize.
Sweet, sweet girl, he thought, his lips twitching into a small, satisfied smile.
Helping her, watching her without her knowing—it stirred something in him, something deeper than just the need to protect.
He liked seeing her happy, seeing that soft, innocent smile on her face.
And maybe, just maybe, he liked knowing that he had a part in it.
But as she continued with her setup, completely oblivious to his presence, Joel’s satisfaction turned to frustration.
She was too trusting, too naive. Anyone could sneak up on her like this—hell, anyone could do worse. The thought made his stomach churn.
She was easy prey. He could see it. Anyone with the wrong intentions would see it.
That didn’t sit right with him. She should have been more aware, should have been on edge, watching her surroundings like he was.
Instead, she was just… carefree.
Smiling to herself, humming that soft tune, completely at ease.
Joel’s hand clenched around the lighter in his pocket, his thumb brushing over the ridiculous cartoon frog on the side.
He almost didn’t bring it—didn’t want to be caught with something so ridiculous—but it was the only spare lighter he had on him.
He’d groaned internally when he fished it out earlier, irritated by the childish design. But now, watching her, it felt like it fit. She was the kind of person who would laugh at something like that, who would find it cute instead of stupid.
Joel moved again, slipping the lighter out of his pocket and placing it by the fire pit while her back was still turned. He retreated quickly, his heart pounding a little faster as he watched her from the shadows.
Her reaction was immediate. She spotted the lighter, her eyes widening in surprise as she reached for it.
She held it up, inspecting the cartoon frog, and then let out a soft laugh.
Joel shifted slightly, his eyes still locked on her as she moved around the camp, still smiling to herself, still humming that soft tune.
A mix of pride and something darker twisted in his chest.
She’s doing alright, he thought, his eyes softening for just a moment.
She’s managing.
But it didn’t change the fact that she shouldn’t be out here alone. So damn easy, he thought, his grip tightening on the tree next to him.
She wouldn’t be easy prey for anyone else.
Not while he was around.
· · ────
The night had grown darker, the soft glow of her campfire flickering against the tall trees.
The shadows seemed to stretch and shift as the wind rustled through the leaves.
She was oblivious to how exposed she was—how vulnerable. Joel could see it, though, with each breath he took, his eyes fixed on her.
Then it happened.
A sudden thud and a sharp, startled yelp echoed through the still night air.
His body reacted immediately.
Joel’s heart lurched, and his mind instantly raced back to those moments he tried so hard to forget—those moments where a single sound could mean life or death.
His pulse pounded in his ears, drowning out everything else. His hand reflexively reached for his knife, muscles coiled, his senses heightened. Without thinking, he moved forward, his feet silent against the earth, ready to act, ready to fight.
His breath came fast and hard as his eyes locked onto her form.
She was sitting, clutching her knee, her face twisted in a mix of pain and frustration.
“Stupid root,” she muttered to herself, clearly frustrated.
She wasn’t in any real danger—just a small cut, a scrape from tripping over one of the tree roots near her tent.But Joel couldn’t process that right away.
All he saw was blood.
And in his mind, that blood meant danger.
His fingers twitched around the handle of the knife, a shuddering breath escaping his lips as the past threatened to swallow him whole. Memories slammed into him—the screams, the gunshots, the sight of bodies crumpling to the ground.
He couldn’t lose her, too.
His mind flashed back to another time, another place, where he couldn’t protect someone. Someone who depended on him.
No. He wouldn’t let that happen again.
Not with her.
She shifted, wincing as she gingerly touched her scraped knee, bringing Joel back to the present.
His chest heaved with heavy, erratic breaths as he forced himself to focus on her—on the here and now.
She wasn’t hurt. Not really. But she was vulnerable. Alone.
And she had no idea how easily that could change.
Joel gritted his teeth, the panic still clawing at the edges of his mind, even as he crouched back into the shadows, watching her, making sure nothing else was lurking in the dark. His grip on the knife loosened, but only slightly.
Her yelp still rang in his ears, echoing in his mind like the sounds of explosions, of soldiers calling out for help, of people he couldn’t save.
He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to breathe, trying to pull himself out of the spiral, but the need to protect her—to keep her safe—burned hotter than anything else. It consumed him.
Joel blinked, his eyes snapping open, refocusing on her.
She was bandaging her knee, her movements slow but steady.
She didn’t realize how close she’d come—how easy it was for something to go wrong.
She never did.
Joel swallowed hard, pushing the memories down deep where they belonged, forcing himself to stay in the present. She finally stood up, brushing herself off with a soft sigh of relief, and Joel let out a shaky breath of his own. She was okay. For now.
But that fear, that suffocating terror of losing her, lingered in his chest, gnawing at him, refusing to let go.
As Joel watched her by the fire, his mind began to drift, despite his efforts to keep it anchored in the present.
He should’ve been focused, alert, scanning for threats the way he used to on patrols. But tonight, his attention wavered, his thoughts tugging him back to a place he’d rather forget.
The darkness around him wasn’t just the night anymore.
It felt like the blackness from years ago, the same emptiness that had swallowed him whole when the world had gone to hell.
The firelight flickered against her face, soft and warm.
A shadow of something ugly crept over his chest, a weight pressing down on him as memories surfaced.
Old sounds echoed in his ears—the screams, the gunfire, the deafening silence that always followed. He blinked hard, trying to shove it all away, trying to stay here, in the now.
But the harder he fought, the more it pressed in. His jaw clenched as he inhaled deeply through his nose, his fingers digging into the ground beneath him, grounding himself.
He wasn’t back there. Not anymore. He was here, with her.
Watching her.
Focus.
But the silence around her, her obliviousness to what could be lurking in the shadows—it made him feel the same helplessness he had felt back then.
It crawled under his skin, a sickening reminder of what happened when you let your guard down, when you trusted too much.
His heart pounded in his chest as the old memories of blood and failure threatened to overwhelm him.
He couldn’t lose control. Not here. Not now.
He was responsible for her, for keeping her safe. That’s what mattered. That’s why he was out here in the dark, crouched behind trees, sneaking around like a damn ghost.
But the sight of her, so unaware, so damn vulnerable, gnawed at the edges of his mind, warping the lines between past and present.
A flash of something dark ran through his mind—her, crumpled, broken, hurt, blood on her soft skin. He blinked hard, squeezing his eyes shut, fighting off the images.
No.
Not her.
It was just his mind playing tricks on him. The way it always did.
He forced his eyes open again, and there she was—still sitting by the fire, completely unaware of his presence. Alive. Unhurt. Fine.
But the fear wouldn’t leave him.
He’d seen too much, lost too much. And he couldn’t shake the thought that she was going to slip through his fingers just like everything else had. His muscles tensed, his hands shaking slightly as his breath came faster.
He had to stay calm, had to stay in control. But the firelight flickered against her skin, and the memory of another fire, another moment he couldn’t change, flickered in his mind.
He was back there, just for a moment—back in the dirt, the weight of the gun in his hands, the scent of burning wood and flesh thick in the air.
He blinked, shaking his head, trying to drag himself out of it. His fingers curled into fists, grounding himself in the rough texture of the earth beneath him.
She’s not them, he reminded himself again, his breath coming fast and ragged. She’s not them. She’s here. You can protect her.
But the fear was relentless.
His need to protect her was more than just that. It was the only thing tethering him to reality, to something other than the nightmares.
If he could keep her safe, if he could make sure nothing happened to her, then maybe he wouldn’t have to drown in the guilt and the memories that haunted him every night.
Joel wiped a hand across his face, the weight of it all pressing down on him as he forced himself to focus on her again.
His chest rose and fell with shaky breaths as he stood up, retreating back to the shadows. He would watch her, make sure nothing happened to her.
And maybe, just maybe, that would be enough to keep the nightmares at bay for one more night.
· · ────
Joel’s breath hitched as he crouched in the shadows, his eyes darting toward every shift in the wind, every rustle of leaves.
Something wasn’t right.
The air felt thick, oppressive, like it was charged with danger, and his gut twisted painfully. He clenched his fists, trying to steady his breathing, but the nagging fear only grew stronger.
Something was out there. Someone was watching.
His mind flickered back to the war—how quiet the enemy could be, how they could slip through the trees, undetected until it was too late.
He was trained for this. He knew when something was lurking, waiting to strike. But this wasn’t like before. This was worse.
Joel’s jaw clenched as he scanned the treeline, eyes narrowing at the dark silhouettes of the forest.
The shadows moved, shifted in ways that didn’t make sense.
His heart pounded in his chest, a cold sweat trickling down his neck.
They're out there. They want her. They couldn't take you - now they want her.
They’ll take her if you don’t move now.
The thought gripped him like a vice, and before he could stop himself, Joel was on his feet, moving toward her camp.
His hand was still wrapped tightly around his knife, his breath heavy and ragged as he stepped closer. His heart hammered against his ribs, every step bringing him closer to the firelight.
He could see her now—still by the tent, oblivious to what was out there, what was coming. He was sure of it.
The shadows… they were moving too fast. Too wrong. The enemy was here. He knew it.
His eyes widened, panic swelling in his chest. Move faster. Move before they take her.
“Joel?”
Her voice was soft, surprised, and completely unaware of the danger as she turned to face him. Her brow furrowed slightly, confusion flashing across her face as she stepped toward him.
But all he could see were the shadows.
Circling. Closing in.
Joel lunged forward, grabbing her arm with a firm, desperate grip. “We need to go,” he growled, his voice rough and frantic.
“What? Joel—”
“They’re here. Right there in the trees,” he rasped, eyes wild, scanning the darkness behind her. “We need to leave now. It’s not safe.”
She froze, her eyes wide with confusion as she looked around, trying to see what he saw. “I don’t—there’s nothing out there—”
“They’re coming for you,” Joel cut her off, his voice urgent, the raw panic clear in every word. His grip tightened on her arm, and for a moment, the fear in his eyes startled her more than his words.
“Joel, wait,” she said, her voice shaky, but she didn’t pull away. She could feel his hand trembling against her skin, his breath coming out in heavy, uneven bursts.
Her heart raced in her chest as she realized something was wrong. Really wrong.
There was no one in the trees. There were no shadows creeping toward her.
But Joel—he believed it.
She could see it in his eyes, in the way his muscles tensed, the way he scanned the darkness like a man hunted.
He wasn’t seeing what was real. He was lost in something else—something dark and terrifying.
Her stomach twisted with a mix of fear and empathy.
Joel wasn’t trying to scare her. He wasn’t trying to hurt her.
He was trying to save her.
But from what?
Joel’s eyes were wild, scanning the tree line as if any second something was going to leap out and drag her away. His grip on her arm tightened, his knuckles white, and his breathing erratic. She could feel the tension radiating off him, his whole body taut like a coiled spring ready to snap.
The way his gaze darted around, the sheer panic in his voice—she could tell he wasn’t seeing the same world she was.
“They’re here,” he repeated, his voice barely more than a growl. “Don’t you see ‘em? They’re in the trees, waitin’ for their chance. They’re comin’ for you. We gotta go, now.”
Her stomach flipped. She couldn’t see anything. The trees were still, the night was calm—nothing moved except the gentle sway of the branches in the breeze. There were no shadows, no figures lurking in the darkness.
But Joel… he was seeing something. Something awful.
For a moment, panic swelled in her chest, the weight of his fear pressing down on her like a heavy stone.
She wanted to pull away, to run, but she couldn’t leave him like this. His mind was trapped in whatever nightmare had a hold on him, and the only thing that seemed real to him was her.
He thought he was protecting her.
“Joel, listen to me,” she said softly, even as her heart raced. “There’s no one out there. It’s just us.”
But he shook his head violently, his eyes wide, unblinking. “No, no, no, you’re wrong.” His voice was strained, and for a second, she thought he might completely lose it. “They’re watchin’… waitin’. I can’t let ‘em take you. You have to come with me now.”
Her pulse thrummed in her ears, her breath quickening as she watched the battle raging behind his eyes. He was lost in something she couldn’t reach.
She glanced at the woods, her eyes scanning the same tree line, trying to see what he saw. But there was nothing. Only shadows and silence.
“Okay,” she said quietly, forcing herself to stay calm, though her fingers trembled as she gently placed her hand on his. “We’ll go. We’ll leave, alright? But you have to calm down.”
He blinked, his breath coming in harsh, ragged bursts. His grip on her arm loosened, but only a little. His eyes flickered between her and the darkened woods, uncertainty clouding his face.
“Just breathe, Joel,” she whispered, keeping her voice steady, even though the fear still crawled beneath her skin. “We’ll go. I’m right here. Just breathe.”
For a moment, Joel seemed to hesitate, his gaze shifting between her and the unseen threat in the trees. His body was still rigid, his muscles coiled with tension, but her voice—her touch—seemed to reach him, if only just a little.
She squeezed his hand gently, her heart pounding in her chest.
“We’ll be okay, Joel. But I need you to calm down. I need you to help me. I can’t do this without you.”
“You’re the only one who can save me,” she whispered, forcing the words through her tightening throat.
He swallowed hard, his breath hitching as he looked at her, really looked at her for the first time since this episode started. His eyes were still clouded with panic, but there was something else there now—something raw, almost vulnerable.
She was giving him what he needed: a sense of control, of purpose. If playing along helped ease his fear, she’d do it. She’d make him feel like he was saving her.
She didn’t let go of his hand. “Let’s go, okay? We’ll go to the car, and we’ll get out of here.”
Joel hesitated for another beat, his eyes darting back to the trees one last time before he nodded slowly. “Alright,” he rasped, his voice strained but quieter now. “But we need to move. Now.”
“Okay,” she agreed, giving him a small, shaky smile. “We’ll go.”
Her heart was still pounding, but she felt a wave of relief as his grip on her arm loosened.
The whole time, Joel’s eyes remained locked on the trees, his paranoia still burning beneath the surface.
She didn’t know what had triggered him, didn’t know what demons had clawed their way into his mind. But she knew one thing for certain—Joel wasn’t in control right now. His fear was.
And as they made their way toward the car, she glanced up at him, her mind racing.
He wasn’t just scared. He was terrified—terrified for her.
But she didn’t let go of his hand, squeezing it gently to pull him back, to ground him in the present. and uncertain, “ I can’t let them take you.”
“They won’t,” she promised, even though the terror in his voice made her own heart race.
“They won’t because you’re here. But I need you to focus on me, alright? Focus on keeping me safe.”
Joel’s eyes flickered again, his shoulders stiff with tension, but he nodded slowly, as if trying to pull himself out of the dark place he’d fallen into.
“I’m sorry,” he muttered, his voice barely audible.
She shook her head, brushing it off. “You don’t need to be sorry. Just stay with me, okay?”
They reached the car, and she gently guided him toward the passenger seat, her hand still resting lightly on his arm. He hesitated, looking back at the woods one more time, his brow furrowed in deep suspicion.
But when she opened the car door, he finally climbed inside, his breathing still uneven, but not as frantic as before.
As she slid into the driver’s seat, she glanced over at him, her mind racing.
She didn’t know what exactly had triggered him, but she knew she had to get him away from here, had to bring him back to some kind of safety.
He needs help, she thought again, her heart heavy with the weight of the realization.
And despite everything, she couldn’t help but feel the strange mix of fear and concern that tied them together in this moment.
· · ────
Joel’s fingers twitched, his hands balling into fists in his lap as he stared out the windshield, still scanning the woods. The shadows played tricks on his mind, flickering with movement that wasn’t really there.
His chest was tight, his pulse still pounding in his ears.
But when he looked over at her, sitting there, waiting for him to calm down, something inside him clicked.
He couldn’t let her drive. Not like this. Not when the road might not be safe.
“Move over,” he muttered, his voice rough, but less frantic now.
He reached for the keys in the ignition, and she blinked in surprise, her brows furrowing as she glanced at him.
“Joel—”
“I’ll drive,” he said, his tone final, leaving no room for argument.
His gaze flicked toward the dark trees again, the unease still crawling under his skin, but there was a steady determination in his voice now.
“I need to make sure we get outta here.”
For a moment, she hesitated, her eyes soft with concern as she studied his face.
But then she gave a small nod, understanding that he needed this—needed to feel like he was in control again.
Wordlessly, she slid over to the passenger seat, and Joel settled behind the wheel, his fingers gripping the steering wheel tightly.
He didn’t waste any time, starting the car and pulling onto the narrow dirt road.
The tires crunched over the gravel as they drove away from the campsite, the darkness closing in around them, but Joel’s focus was sharp now.
His jaw clenched as he kept his eyes on the road, his mind still racing, still half-expecting something to jump out from the shadows.
But there was something grounding about the feel of the wheel beneath his hands, the engine rumbling under his control.
“She’s safe,” he reminded himself. “I’m getting her out.”
The thought repeated in his mind like a mantra, pushing back the lingering panic that had gripped him so tightly just moments before.
He wouldn’t let anything happen to her. Not now. Not ever.
He glanced over at her, just for a second, seeing the way she sat quietly beside him, her hands clasped in her lap, her eyes flicking between him and the road.
She didn’t say anything, didn’t press him, but he could feel her presence calming him, bringing him back to the present.
But beneath the surface, the fear still simmered, the paranoia still gnawing at him.
He couldn’t shake the feeling that something was still out there, watching, waiting. And that made his grip on the wheel tighten even more.
“I’m sorry,” he muttered under his breath, his voice barely loud enough for her to hear.
She glanced at him, her expression softening. “You don’t have to apologize, Joel.”
But he did. He had to apologize for putting her in danger, for not being able to protect her. He wasn’t enough, not in that moment. And that thought alone ate at him, twisting in his gut.
The road stretched out in front of them, the trees looming in the distance, and Joel’s mind remained focused, laser-sharp, as he drove them toward safety.
Toward his home.
Where he could keep an eye on her.
Where he could make sure nothing would ever hurt her.
· · ───────────𖥸──────────· ··
well…. that was intense.
(she’s better than me I would’ve ran away screaming)
Horny, people - I hope you can forgive me for not having real smut in this yet.. next chapter is going to be heated, get ready - it’s finally happening.
Again - comment if you want me to remind you when there’s a next part!
xoxo
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daytaker · 1 year ago
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The Gang React to You Giving Them Chocolates on Valentine's Day
And other Valentine's Day miscellanea. I'm going with MC giving store-bought chocolates. I know in some places, it's more common to give homemade chocolates, but I for one do not have any idea how that is done and it's not something that's common where I live, so I'm going to go with what I know, which is very little. Enjoy! (Mostly below the cut.)
The length of these varies. Some are quite short. I just wanted to put out some sort of Valentine's Day themed Thing, even if I'm almost two days late.
Lucifer
"How thoughtful. I don't suppose there's anything deeper I'm meant to read into here?"
He's so smug. Unreasonably so. More than you would expect. Yeah, guys, he got chocolates from MC. But his pride doesn't allow him to flaunt the fact. He has to just hope and pray people actively ask him whether he's gotten anything or where those not-so-discreetly placed chocolates sitting on his desk happened to come from.
Lucifer is very traditional in his treatment of you. When it comes to events like this, he's almost painfully predictable. He'll certainly have roses for you, and depending on your relationship, he might reserve dinner for two at a high end restaurant. And if your relationship is at a certain level, you can expect a trail of rose petals leading to the bed. It's kind of cringeworthy but he means well.
Mammon
"O-oh... Ahem... Is it Valentine's Day? Ha! I thought I was forgettin' somethin'. Heh, uh... thanks, human."
Obviously he didn't forget; he's been stressing over this day for the past week. He needs to get you something, but it can't be anything that's too cheesy or anything that makes him look cheap, so he's probably broken the bank to get you some sort of jewelry that he'll spend the next century paying off, but it's worth it.
When he gets chocolates from you, he plays it off like it's no big deal, but actually, he's so excited to reciprocate that before he has time to think it over, he's acting like he just so happened to have this expensive piece of jewelry on his person so you might as well take it for him. He spends the rest of the day kicking himself because now how in the world are you supposed to know that this was actually a very tactful and expensive gift from the greatest demon in the Devildom?
That, and he'll probably spend the entire day glaring at his brothers and the dateables from the corner as they shower you with gifts and attention.
Leviathan
"Wh...? For me? This isn't a prank, right? Because I'm not gonna forgive you if this box is full of tide pods!"
It's not full of tide pods, so all is well. He's so embarrassed to have doubted you that he tries to just shove his gift into your hands and push you out of his room, but it won't take too much persistence to get him to back down.
His gift is some sort of merch relating to an anime, manga, or game the two of you have particularly enjoyed together. Preferably something cute and evocative of the holiday. He doesn't know. He's never done this before. Why would he? Nobody would ever think to give him anything on Valentine's Day, so why would he bother with gifts? You do remember that nobody likes him, right? He doesn't like them either, so it's fine, but---
Let's just thank him for our gift before he falls too far down the self-hate spiral.
Satan
"I had hoped I might receive something from you today."
Satan is glad to get something from you, no matter what it is, but to be honest, chocolates probably aren't the best choice for him. He'd rather have something a little more heart-felt, that seems like you picked it out with him in mind. Literally anything cat-themed, or a book of some sort (bonus if it's a romance novel).
He's probably gone and done something stupidly romantic like buy you flowers and a book of poetry with certain parts highlighted.
But don't be fooled. Satan's favorite part of Valentine's Day is talking about its gruesome history, from the martyrdom of St. Valentine to a whole host of brutal murders that have taken place on the day. Catch him trying to figure out how to shoehorn the Chicago St. Valentine's Day Massacre into a casual conversation.
Asmodeus
"Oh, for meeee? You're such a sweetheart!"
He adds it to his enormous pile of chocolates, cards, flowers, and love letters. But of course, it's special, because it's from you.
He loves it, but... he's another one who would probably prefer something a little more personalized. Being who he is, he's a very popular demon on Valentine's Day, so seeing you put in a little effort to get him something with a bit of Asmo-flair would thrill him.
Beelzebub
"Chocolates...? This is the best thing I could have asked for. They'll taste even better knowing they're from you."
Well, obviously he loves them. He probably tried to get you chocolates too, but it doesn't matter how much he loves you. Beel's gonna Beel. The box is empty. He's shocked. He was sure he left some.
Belphegor
"...Wait, it's...? ...Thanks, MC. They look really good."
Belphie stares down at the chocolates in his hands, looking tired and mellow, while he internally panics because holy shit, it's already February 14? When did that happen? He doesn't have anything for you. He hates Valentine's Day. Why does it have to exist and lay bare all his inadequacies, like being a procrastinator and forgetting to prepare for things in advance even to the slightest degree?
Diavolo
"Ah, for Valentine's Day! It's a delight to receive this in person!"
Diavolo probably gets plenty of Valentine's Day presents from admirers (and suck-ups) around the Devildom, but most of them come in the mail or are otherwise delivered in an impersonal manner. So when you approach him directly to give him some chocolates, he's reminded why you're everyone's favorite human (himself included).
Also, you'd better clear out your schedule, because Diavolo booked out all of Ristorante Six for a dinner date tonight. Yes, the entire thing. Yes, on Valentine's Day. No, he's not worried about the dozens of disappointed couples who had probably been hoping to eat there.
Barbatos
"Any gift from you is satisfactory in my eyes."
It's kind of embarrassing to give regular old chocolates to someone like Barbatos who's a complete whiz in the kitchen, especially when it comes to sweets. But you figure he'd appreciate the gesture, and you'd be right. Of course, he will turn around and present you with a variety of immaculate, handcrafted artisan chocolates, tailor made to your personal taste. But sure, those store-bought candies you got in the heart-shaped box are completely fine, so stop stressing out about it.
Solomon
"Aw, thank you, my adorable apprentice! I have some homemade chocolates for you! What? Aren't you going to try some?"
Solomon tries to kill you on Valentine's Day...with love, obviously! But seriously, aren't you going to try the chocolates? He put his whole heart into them. And the hearts of several unique Devildom species. They're not toxic, stop worrying.
Simeon
"The fact that you thought of me means more than you realize."
And he means it. The fact that you thought about him, and when thinking about him, made the active decision to buy him something for Valentine's Day makes him stupidly happy.
Simeon strikes me as a flowers kind of guy. He got you flowers. Maybe some homemade treats too, but definitely flowers.
Luke
"Thanks! I got you something too. Happy Valentine's Day!"
Luke made cookies. They're delicious. Befriending this kid is the smartest thing you ever did.
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sickhabitt · 1 year ago
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modern ellie head cannons!
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- Ellie would definitely do photography, i mean we SAW photos of dina in her art room and around the house, the photograph of her, Jesse, and dina, i think she'd LOVE to do photography! just as a fun hobby. she definitely has one of those small 60 dollar grainy cameras that she carries around, snapping pictures of anything
-speaking of photos, she definitely would snap pictures of you! she would hang them up around her room, next to her bed or in a small little frame. Like, you standing in the kitchen, sleeping, if you play an instrument, studying, kissing, anything.
- I also think she LOVES hiking, camping, anything involving the wilderness. She could definitely live out there if she wanted too.
-again, topic of wilderness, she probably just grabs random animals and bugs. Like those people who are genuinely NOT scared of the everglades, shes just casually picking up a snake and grinning like she won a TROPHY.
-this might b a reach but, since shes an artistic person, she would probably be super good at makeup. not that she wears it as often, and if she does its just black eyeshadow, maybe blush and her brows. but theres definitely been a few times shes done your makeup and its turned out BETTER then you can even do it.
- her artistic talent has definitely lead to her doing super cute projects, gifts, and activities. Her gifts are 80 percent of the time hand made. she could definitely make some really nice rings, necklaces, everything out of random stones. she would come across something on pinterest and save it into some folder which is filled with things.
- facebook user.
-now if shes working i feel like her jobs could really vary. definitely not a barista because she doesn't like coffee, she prefers tea for sure, but she's definitely in something more artistic or musically involved. Like a record shop, guitar center, book store, maybe a pottery shop where you can MAKE your own pottery, or a jewelry store.
- her room would be a mess. jewelry everywhere, clothes tossed around, random shit tapped to her wall, anything you can think of its THERE.
- a million people have said it before but.. she shit posts like, crazy. She might have a main account for her instagram and she either shit posts to her main story or close friends. OR she has a private spam account, mainly used for stirring shit up with people.
-shes a tea girl! like sweet tea, iced tea, chamomile, green tea, chai, anything TEA wise. she owns it. she probably has some dumb cup specifically for tea, like cups from Spencer's.
- i feel like shes a collector, like bottle caps, pennies, gems, or guitars (if she has that money, but she's definitely broke.)
- definitely a stoner
- as stated like way before, she likes the wilderness, she would LOVE the beach.
- has a old vans shoe box, filledddd with shit from you if youre the gift giving type!
- wears vans or converse, but doesnt even skateboard, just likes the look.
- nails are constantly painted, dark, earthy colors tho, she wouldnt have long nails either, theyre trimmed short because, 1. she hates the feeling of long nails, 2. playing guitar with long nails SUCKS. 3. 🏳️‍🌈
first and maybe last time ill ever probably do smth like this... literally only did this cuz im sick 🤒
HOW CAN YOU HELP PALESTINE? 🇵🇸?
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foldingfittedsheets · 6 months ago
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When deciding who to work for there is a sliding scale of employers that goes from lil mom and pop shops up to corporate monoliths. I have worked at both ends of the spectrum and I can pretty definitively say that tiny businesses are hands down the most insane employers.
The sweet spot is a place that has like 10-20 stores; that’s the best possible work environment. They’ll be polished enough to have protocols that make work structured, but not so bogged down with bureaucracy that nothing can ever get done.
This story is not from that sweet spot. This story is from my time working at Oil and Vinegar. Now, like many little franchise stores, the idea was solid. There was on tap imported olive oil and vinegar and it was really delicious. Top shelf. Unfortunately, each location was like the Wild West because owners varied wildly.
My owner was the human embodiment of Mr. Krabbs. His eyes were just constant dollar signs. Throughout my training he informed me of the price of every single piece of equipment I touched and how much it cost to replace it.
He had cameras set up to watch us, and an app on his phone to access the live feed. He’d call us to ask what we were doing when he’d just checked a camera to make sure we were being honest.
Now, the trouble was he had two locations. His location further south did amazing. It was way more centrally located and got three times the foot traffic. The one I worked in was in the snottiest mall possible in Arizona and consequently the rent was through the roof.
It was not going well for my store. We didn’t get as much traffic, so there was only so much I could do in a day. I could dust, sweep, and wait for customers. I read a lot and was frank when he called to interrogate me. I always asked for additional tasks but he never had any. What could I do to prop up a failing business?
But this man was convinced there was some Secret Reason that the store I was in was doing worse. He crunched numbers, looked at staff, and eventually hit upon the most insane possible solution.
We used too much toilet paper.
We were probably stealing toilet paper! Bleeding him dry one single ply square at a time! How dare we need to use the bathroom?! His south location used half as much toilet paper as we did, we must be thieving little monsters!!!!
Friends. The south location was populated entirely by men. My location had three people on staff who had to sit to pee. It was so blindly transparently the source of the discrepancy but this man was convinced we were making off with toilet paper to bankrupt him.
So he implemented what he believed to be an entirely reasonable response to this base treachery. We were allowed to have one roll of toilet paper. At any given time, one roll was permitted to us. This was so transparently unhinged that we protested but he insisted. If we were low on toilet paper we needed to call him to drop off a roll that he brought from his home. Smiling jovially, he assured us he lived so close by that it would be no problem!
When we needed to call him often for more he started tearing his hair out. What were we using toilet paper for?! Why wasn’t his genius plan to stop our scandalous waste working??!
Finally, the manager, the only man on staff had to pull the owner aside and be like, “Look, man, their bladders are smaller. They need to wipe every time they pee. They need to pee even more on their period. Is this really the hill you want to die on?”
Yes. It was. The manager was fired unrelated reasons and denounced as a traitor. The toilet paper ration lasted until I quit and probably until the store closed six months later.
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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 2 months ago
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Raven pls help a fellow out🙏 Do you know any website that sells cheap but good enough twst merch? I can't find any decent ones that aren't just pins:(
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Wow, Mr. Fellow Honest himself is coming to me asking for help?/j
I don't normally give this kind of advice, but I figured I might as well since it's the holiday season and maybe people are looking for Twst merch to gift to themselves or to others. I included pros and cons along with each suggestion. Whether you decide to look into that particular method or not is up to you!
(Note that most of the time these are second-hand options, which will usually be cheaper than buying directly from Twst and/or collaborating companies at retail price.)
Book-Off
Pros: (generally) cheaper than other locations that import anime and manga goods, easy to find pins/badges and plushies here Cons: because the items are often unsold merch... quality may vary (check item before you buy), may not be able to find merch of your desired character, physical store locations are not organized by series so you'll probably have to spend a long time digging for what you want
Mercari
Pros: more variety of merch avaliable (including rarer stuff), can haggle the price and speak with individual sellers to negotiate or bundle goods Cons: may need to pay for delivery + other additional fees, price of item may be more expensive depending on the rarity, some items may not be brand new (check listing description; it will generally indicate the condition), item may be shipping from other countries so DOUBLE CHECK where it is shipping from before committing to the purchase or you'll be slapped with an expensive shipping fee to pay
Suruga-ya
Pros: excellent variety of merch, merch is often listed in yen so the price tends to be cheap, shipping is relatively fast (it doesn't take like A Month to get to you), quality is generally good Cons: shipping can be very expensive (unless you catch the site during a period in which they offer free shipping and/or do a group order to split the shipping costs with others)
fan artists!!
(Totally biased opinion, I recommend them the most 🥰)
Pros: you get to have a more unique piece of merch that's made from another fan's passion and love for Twst, you support a small independent creator
Cons: may not be financially feasible in some cases (for example, fanmade plushies may be more expensive than the mass produced official nuis are), fan artists are limited in the types of merch they can create if they don't have the means for bigger projects (like apparel, bags, etc.), you have to do your own research on who sells Twst fan merch (there is no centralized list or platform where all Twst fan merch sellers congregate)
Hope this helps, and best of luck with the merch hunt~
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trashmouth-richie · 1 year ago
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master list
eddie! x fem reader
summary: 3 years later; happy birthday
I can’t believe this is almost the end. It is so bittersweet to be uploading this and thanking you all for the continued support on this story. I hope you will miss eddie + tooty just as much as I will. The epilogue is next and then a fun little surprise for you all.
trigger warnings: fluff, sweet sweet fluff 💕
Crinkly paper streamers twist down into even boughs along the cedar planked walls.  A homemade banner crafted with the best paint Melvald’s could offer, hung over the sliding patio door, freckled with glitter and deep hues of scarlet and onyx. 
  Carefully stenciled uniform letters spelling out a greeting for the birthday boy, line the banner— perfectly positioned.  
  Looking at it now, you can nearly feel the backache it caused from the leaned over pretzel position you were tangled in while attempting to make it look store bought. Instead it took hours and a ruined shirt to paint each letter with precision on your living room floor. 
  Red plastic cups were stacked in a corner on top of a cheap plastic table cloth adorned with paper plates and plastic utensils. A smaller card table from the Wheeler-Byer’s held a two tiered homemade cake, dolloped with sticky whipped strawberry frosting. His favorite.
  Polaroids of the birthday boy were placed, in no particular pattern, with sticky tack to the wall above the card table holding the presents. 
  Various shots from the past year capturing adventures big and small. He had wanted that.
  Wanted to remember every detail— an important step to moving forward, leaving the past in the dust and enjoying the second chance at life you had both been given. 
  The pictures were mostly candids, snapped in the blur of a moment, memories to be cherished for a lifetime to come. And although some of them were cheesy, or horribly cliche; they held delicate moments of the past two years of you and Eddie, together at last.
  You suck the sticky remnants of frosting from your thumb as you carefully arrange a framed picture of his graduation day just so on the table, stepping back and admiring the hard work and weeks worth of planning you had done.  
  Your fingers dance along the sharp edges of the selected photos you had given Jonathan to print for you. 8”x10”, 5”x7”, colored, sepia tone, and even black and white you had wanted to give it more of a collage feel to the project, and Jonathan did a great job. 
  The pictures varied from moments that probably didn’t need to be remembered and ones that should have been taken by a professional, but it was perfect, exactly the way you had envisioned it. 
  A snapshot photo of Eddie’s plump lips wrapped around a brown beer bottle after a night of helping Wayne paint the outside of his trailer, his signature middle finger in the air, the rings glittering with the flash— was propped next to a candle.
  One of Wayne and Eddie hugging on Christmas last year, a small tree tucked into the corner of the yellowing smoke stained walls and part of your finger covering the lens, and another one right after the first of them both looking shocked that you snapped the picture. 
  A picture of you and him, holding fishing poles on the bank of Lover’s Lake. His arm wrapped around your waist, your pole holding a sizable fish, his line snagged on moss and a tattered beat up tennis shoe, a proud smile on his face as he looked down at you, you mid laugh as Wayne teased Eddie behind the lens.
  Another of just him in black and white, asleep on the bed you shared his dark tattoos looked piercing against his bare chested. Long angelic lashes closed against pinked warm cheeks, the silver scar barely visible on his bottom lip. 
  One with Eddie and the boys, sitting in the backyard, the tails of the fire licking into the sun fading sky, his hands wild in the middle of explaining a campaign idea. 
  A candid of Steve, Eddie, Robin and Dustin wearing their tuxes and running into the ocean. Shoes snug into the sand and socks left forgotten. Steve’s white jacket thrown into the air, half of a laughing, Leighanne all dolled up and beautiful on their big day. 
  A photo from the same day, but of only you and him, your lips perched on his cheek as he held you in his lap in the back of a limo. His other cheek sparkling with the residue of a lipgloss kiss, one hand holding your strappy lavender heels, the other wrapped around your waist. His dimpled smile wide and toothy.
  And finally, your favorite one: one of just you and him, dressed in your homemade costumes as Mario and Luigi. A felt mustache falling from under your nose,his white gloved hands holding up rock n’ roll. Right before you two had won the Halloween costume contest at Nancy and Jonathan’s house. 
  Wayne had brought baby pictures that he had dug out of an old box in the forgotten storage shed when you had moved in. Dust lining the frames showing a brown haired baby with doe eyes, drooling over a washcloth while in the sink for a bath. A curly haired toddler with a big smile while on the swings at a park. And many more that were placed around the house. 
  The most special of them all sat on Eddie’s bedside table: a woman with soft honey muddied curls sweeping down to the middle of a white blouse, sunglasses pushed into her hair atop her head, kissing the forehead of a baby swaddled in a blanket.
  “Tooty!” Gareth called from the kitchen, “phone call!” 
  You set the napkins next to Nancy who was meticulously adjusting the m&m dish  into its correct place. Trying to balance out the clashing colors with the black and red theme. 
  “Looks perfect as always, Nance,” you murmur as you squeeze her arm gently when you pass her. 
  She huffs in disapproval, sweeping a permed curl behind her ear, her finger to her lips as she tuts, “it’s missing something.” You squeeze her arm again and trot into the living room. 
  Gareth is holding the blue phone by the long cord twirling it around like a pair of nunchucks, shoving the last bits of a hot dog in his mouth, ketchup wedged into the corner by his lips. “ it’s Hig D,” he announciates horribly, “somthin’ about heddie— shit that’s good— something about them just getting ready to leave work.” 
  laughing at him you can only roll your eyes, “you’ll make a good whore someday deep throatin’ like that,” you tease, taking the phone from his hand. 
  Gareth chuckles and shoves your shoulder, “haven't had any complaints yet, Oh! By the way, I need a three day extension on rent. Cool?” 
  Rolling your eyes again, a smile escapes your lips as you flip him off. 
  Of all of Eddie’s friends, Gareth was the hardest one to crack, but now he was easily your favorite. He reminded you a lot of Eddie in high school. A wild haired mess, always down for a crazy adventure to surely land him into trouble. But a big ol softie when it came down to people he cared about, especially Will. 
  Curling your fingers around the telephone cord, you talk into the receiver, “hey D, what’s up?” 
  —-
  Argyle and Jonathan arrive through the front door, smelling like purple palm tree delight and balancing pizza boxes in their arms. 
  Robin spins at least a dozen times trying to find a place for the tower of cheesed pie and nearly knocks into Jonathan in her pursuit of frenzy. The boys slide them into place onto a card table against the kitchen wall, a photo of you and Eddie holding the keys to Hop’s cabin with wide grins on your faces hanging above it. 
  The brisk May breeze flows through the house, flickering the candles and making the helium balloons bump into one another in a lazy staticky dance. 
  A blur of red stalks into the house holding two bottles of liquor in each hand, a baseball hat backwards on her head, “hope Eddie likes whiskey because that’s all Walt would sell me,” she says heaving the bottles onto the counter in a clunkered manner, wiping the sweat from her freckled forehead, sporting a fresh new bob cut all thanks to you, “stubborn ass, he charged me nearly double,” she huffs, folding the paper sacks haphazardly, “son-of-a-bitch wouldn’t even let me use my employee rate!” 
  “Thanks for getting it Maxi-pad,” you say over your shoulder stifling a giggle from the old nickname you hadn’t called her since middle school, “Eddie’ll drink beer from a boot as long as he got a buzz from it—let me know what I owe you.” 
  She spins on squeaky sneakers and grabs a slice of pizza from one of the leaning boxes, squishing the greasy cheese between her teeth, talking with a mouthful “quit— we’re square for all the times you’ve come over since moving back.” 
  A sad expression falters behind the mask on her porcelain complexion. But she’s quick to shove it all away. It had been months since she’d been back in Hawkins, and your friend since elementary school was just starting to get her life back into order.
  “Eddie’s offer still stands by the way,” you gently whisper, turning away from placing candles into the pink frosting to give her a quick squeeze, the fringes of your friendship mending together after years of not really speaking. 
  Holding Max at arms length you raise your eyebrows at her, “I’m serious,” a clip in your voice that even Nancy would envy. 
  She shrugs quickly and looks back with wet blue eyes, not willing to let her guard down on the eve of a party, “I’ll think about it,” her jaw set tight. 
 “Let's have fun tonight, okay?” she begs, “it isn’t every day Eddie’s old decrepit ass turns forty.” 
  The giggle she was hoping for to ease the tension tickled your throat, “he’s twenty nine, Maxine,” you tease back. 
  “Oh-ho-ho,” she chuckles, crossing the linoleum to the fridge in a swift motion, throwing open the door and leaning into the illuminated box, fingers dancing along the brown neck of a Bud Light, a smug smile on her salmon lips, “government names huh, T? I’ll remember that.” 
  —
  Will and Mike were in charge of moving vehicles behind the north tree line away from the driveway and out of sight. Each car owner silently held their breath and the litter of anxiety rising higher as Mike got behind the wheel of each car. 13 tickets by Hopper’s deputies hadn’t slowed him down yet. 
  Leighanne, and El had just finished hanging the decorative white lights on the back deck and around the trees. The backyard looked like a little cozy oasis. And it warmed your soul to see it all come together. 
  It was rough when you had first moved in here. Hopper had a buddy who owned the cabin you now call home. It was far from town but hadn’t been renovated in years. Nothing a little elbow grease and nights after work wouldn’t fix, it took six months with help from just about everyone you knew, but the place was perfect. 
  And after everything that happened in Hawkins, Eddie’s promise stuck. 
  He got you both out. Started a new life away from the wandering eyes and whispered lies. Even after he was cleared, people still wouldn’t let it go. 
  But, the cabin was everything you could imagine and more. Perched into a thick grove of trees. Secluded. Secretive. Exactly what you both needed. 
  It was  heaven. 
  Lounging on blankets in the soft grass, bare toes curled into the soft comforter, the girls sat back and laughed as Steve nearly tipped over the entire pan of grilled burgers and hot dogs.  
  “Yeah laugh it up you two!” Steve scolded playfully, tugging and shoving a hand into the thick tuft of hair on his head, “you won’t be laughing when there’s nothing to eat!” 
  “Such sass from The Grill Master,” Leighanne giggled, covering her mouth with a delicate hand, a large diamond on her ring finger.
  Before Steve could whip up something cheeky, Arygle’s smooth baritone voice broke amongst the laughs, “Damn my dude,” he chuckled, leading Eden’s small frame through the patio door, “smells good out here.” 
  Steve huffs again, “Thanks, I’m just doing what I’m told, don’t mind the peanut gallery back there,” he gestures with his spatula to the two giggling gals on the blanket. 
  The keg was perched on the small back deck, ice melting slowly around the tin base. Steve had been grilling burgers for the last half hour, smears of grease rubbed on the bottom of his red apron embossed with fancy lettering, kiss the cook.
  “And you’re doing it man,” Argyle salutes him as a fellow culinary soldier, “it’s art what you’re doing dude, pure fuckin art—like Picasso if he was a chef… piSteveo.”
  “Okay man—yeah, I get it,” Steve says all in one breath, rolling his eyes and cracking a grin back at his bride who was biting her own cheek and trying not to laugh. “Dustin and Susie ride with you?” 
  “Yeah,” Eden scowls, crossing her legs and dragging Argyle down to sit on the picnic bench, her black pixie cut fluttering in the light breeze resembling a real life goth tinkerbell, “that four eyed little shit kept going on and on about the ecosystem and methane gas or whatever, so yeah they’re here— probably terrorizing everyone else about the election or some shit.” 
  Steve snorts and flips another burger onto the grates, the sizzle of charred seasoned beef signaling the first signs of summer, “sounds about right.” 
  “Alright guys,” you say stepping through the sliding patio door, the sun close to setting in the west taking the warmth with it, “D said they’re just leaving so everyone get in position.” 
  -
  “..I’m just sayin’ is all,” D barks, finishing wiping the grease from a gas station bean burrito on the back of his hand from his pudgy lips, “I’ll give you top dollar for it.” 
  Eddie took another sip from his Mt. Dew, barreling down the highway and thumping his thumb along the steering wheel, contemplating heavily on what Big D had been asking of him. 
  “fuck I dunno man… it’s like a part of me y’know?” 
  Eddie rubs the beginning of his scruffy chin, unable to grow a full beard even though he’s nearly in his thirties, Peter Pan syndrome hitting him square in the jaw. 
  “had it since I was fifteen, fixed it all up with my uncle,” he mumbles lighting a cigarette between his teeth, “it’s a staple to the Munson name.” 
  D rolls his eyes and tosses the foil wrapper to the floorboards of Eddie’s truck. “that was like twenty years ago man, you don’t even drive it anymore.”
  Eddie chuckles through a cloud a smoke, turning the steering wheel to the right down the hidden driveway, overgrown grass on both ends of a rotted through fence post, “easy there asshole— ‘sides, thought you were buying Jeff’s mom’s car?” 
  D slides belches loud and throws his chubby hand out the window, fresh air wiggling his fingers slowly, “I did, just gotta fix it up, but the van would be my daily driving chick magnet.” He wiggles his eyebrows like two black caterpillars dancing a tango. 
  Eddie smiles to himself, memories of past times booze cruising to Rick’s and hauling band equipment to the Hideout. Times long gone and fading like the moon into dawn. 
  A time when he was ruthless, chaotic and hungry for the world’s shittiness just so he could add his own fucked up version to it. A big fuck you to anyone who ever doubted him. 
  A time before you were officially his. 
  Nowadays the bear inside of him was tame, licking its paws in laziness, hibernating with the sounds of a calm beating heart. Fed and cared for, content. 
  “We’ll see,” he replies, blowing smoke out of the corner of his mouth, “you still owe me $40 for that service you gifted to that waitress last week, fucker.” 
  “Pffft,” D says lighting a cigarette, “take it out of my check boss man.” 
  Eddie cranked his lips into a smirk, it still didn’t feel real.
-
  The roar of Eddie’s diesel truck echoes along the tree line, vibrating against the fallen branches from the late winter storm that snapped full grown Red Oaks like matchsticks when the ice built heavy onto its branches. 
  The cabin lights were dim, curtains pulled tight to barely show the glimpse of any crack of light. It wasn’t unusual, your lives were kept pretty private after everything that happened, doors always locked. 
  “The hell?” Eddie grumbled, wiggling the stick into neutral with the palm of his hand and killing the engine, the old dodge sputtering out to quiet, “thought you said Gareth was comin’ over to practice tonight?” 
  D fumbled for words, reaching for the metal door handle “no, yeah he’s here— maybe Will dropped ‘im off.”
  Eddie quirked an eyebrow, the exhaustion from work taking over his features as he let out a loud yawn and arched his back against the velour seats, he climbed out of the pickup, lunchbox in tow. 
  “alright man, ‘m just gonna shower quick,” he hooks a thumb behind his shoulder, walking up the stone path to the front door, “think Tooty still has the hose hooked up if you wanted to rinse off.” 
  D stomps around the truck, leaning a thick arm onto the hood, “don’t make any special accommodations for me dude, I’m cool.” 
  “Yeah yeah you’re pretty cool alright,” Eddie said climbing the two steps with heavy footsteps, and putting a brass key into the knob, twisting it in his grasp, “why’d you think I had the window dow—”
  Eddie is almost knocked back into the wall by the room full of his friends shouting surprise! as he entered the cabin. 
  Shock and a racing heartbeat wash away to a dimpled smile and squinted eyes. It was worth the weeks of planning and aligning everyone’s schedules to make it all work out. And in the end, the crowd turned into a blur when you peaked your head behind the kitchen wall grinning wide at the handsome man at the door. 
  His girl. His one and only. Spoiling him with a surprise party. Mouthing “happy birthday baby,” from across the room with a warm smile that still was able to tinge his cheeks in the prettiest shade of bashful. 
  Backs were slapped and shoulders clapped as Eddie made his way around to the guests. His smile was wide and toothy, lighting up the room with his deep laugh and dimples. 
  He hugged friends like he hadn’t seen them in years, pressed cheek to cheek and apologizing later for grease smudges left on their shirts. 
  “Shit,” Wayne breathed, as he stepped into the doorway, finding you immediately and looking sympathetic, “sorry we’re late, the missus was wrappin’ a last minute gift.” 
  Nancy and Mike’s mom stood tucked beneath Wayne’s arm. Four gifts wrapped tight and pristine, held in her arms. The alimony from Ted was still treating her more than well. 
  “Wayne,” Karen giggles like a schoolgirl, a long manicured hand to his denim jacket, dismissing him with a wink, “here Tooty,” she gleams, walking towards you with her arms outstretched, embracing you in a hug, “it’s just a little something for the two of you, saw it at the mall and couldn’t resist!” 
  It was an adjustment for the youngest Wheeler when Karen left Ted. Nancy and Mike didn’t seem to care, having already been moved out of the house and living their own lives. But Holly took it hard, refusing to see her mother at all. 
  “It’s perfect thank you Karen,” Eddie said, sneaking around you, his fingers dragging along your lower back  and down your hip, sending shivers to your core. A quick wink to you as he grabs the gifts from her and Wayne. 
  He was happy for them, he had never seen Wayne with someone who treated him so well before  in his life, he gave his shoulder a squeeze, “next time put your glasses on so you can see while driving, might get here on time, old man.”
  Wayne rolled his eyes and put Eddie in a headlock, “I ain’t here to see you anyhow, came to see my favorite daughter in law to be if you’d just marry her already, didn’t even know it was your birthday you little punk.” 
  “Yeah yeah,” Eddie scoffed, “that’s why it says ‘Ed’s birthday’ on the calendar in your office, right? Because you didn’t know?” 
  Wayne releases Eddie and gives him a side hug, “been celebratin’ this day for twenty-three years with y’ boy, I ain’t never forgettin’” 
  Karen was always like a mother to you. The Wheeler’s held such a special place in your heart, and you’d always be grateful for the kindness both her and Ted had shown you when you were growing up. Seeing her now with Wayne surprisingly wasn’t that odd. They balanced each other well. 
  Wayne pulls you into the other side of him, keeping you and Eddie under each arm, “looks real good in here darlin’” He says, looking down at you with icy blue eyes, “sure am glad  y’ learned how to tame this wild li’l shit.” 
  you smile up at the Munson’s and Eddie sticks out his tongue at you. 
  “Now,” he says addressing only Eddie, “I swear on my mama and daddy’s graves, Ed, you better marry this girl someday or ‘m gonna hang y’ from your toes by that clothesline out back.” 
  Eddie rolls his eyes, but before he can speak, Nancy  waves at her mother and stands atop a metal chair.
  “Alright everyone, let’s go out back and we can start eating.”
  Once the room emptied it was just you and Eddie. The tension was always thick in every room you were in with him, electric in ways that buzzed between your legs and made your head feel fuzzy. 
  You waited your turn patiently. 
  Eddie coins a coy grin behind his plump lips, walking with his hands behind his back and moving his shoulder low, cocking his head. 
  Your hands, busy themselves with arranging presents, fingers slipping between the silky ribbons and plucking the ends to watch them curl.  Warm arms surround your waist and you act surprised and let out a squeal. 
  He sets you down and pushes the collar of your shirt to the side, pressing his lips like angel’s wings to the skin on your shoulder, relishing in the way the goosebumps crawled across your flesh. 
  “Eddie,” you hum, working your fingers behind you to pull on the tendrils of sweaty hair tucked behind his neck. 
  “Hmm?” He breathes hot across your neck, working his way up to the dainty gold necklace, the same one brandishing the ring he gave you for Christmas in 1992, nothing compared to the one he was eyeballing at the jewelry store in the mall. 
  Rubbing the underside of your chin with the bulb of his nose, you shudder and feel his grin on your skin, “all of this for me?” 
  You nod and whine when a large hand dances across the waist of your jeans. And almost let out a moan when he nips at your earlobe. 
  Eddie’s work days were long but the nights spent between the sheets were longer, both of you never getting enough of each other. The passion and static was always there. 
  “Wanted to surprise my birthday boy,” you breathed as your head fell back into his shoulder, and he bucked his hips into you, pushing you into the rickety table and shaking the presents. 
  “You’re too good to me,” Eddie whispered into your ear, his fingers digging into your hips. “How am I ever going to thank my pretty gir—?”
  “Hey you guys comin’ or what?” Steve asks, hands on his hips and a scorch mark on his apron, “Nancy’s making a fucking seating chart out there, and I really hope you have liability insurance because Argyle is trying to teach Dustin yoga.”
  Eddie takes his lips from your neck and turns to face Steve, “I mean, we coulda been if you hadn’t barged in.” 
  “Eddie!” you laugh, slapping his chest lightly, and straightening your shirt, “we’ll be right out Steve, just going to give Eddie his birthday present.” 
  His eyes sparkle in mischievous wonder, “oooh you think we have time?” He says unbuttoning his work blues, “I like the way you think dirty sweetheart.” 
  You roll your eyes and tug him down the hallway to your bedroom. 
  “Jesus Christ,” Steve mutters under his breath, shaking his head and making his way through the patio door, “nah don’t worry I’ll entertain the guests,” he says in annoyance, “maybe we can play parcheesi or hotdog Jenga.” 
  —
  “Don’t peek!” 
  “Oh c’mon!” 
  “Eddie.” 
  “Ugh fine, but you better be naked or I’ll pout.” 
  “Such a brat...”
  “Don’t act surprised babe.” 
  “Alright open, but I am very much still dressed, that part of your present is later tonight.” 
  Eddie had showered and was getting dressed shoving his feet into a worn pair of converse when you waltzed into the room, a small oblong box behind your back. 
  Dropping the carefully wrapped present into his awaiting hands, he holds the box like a carton of eggs. One eye peeked open, “well,” Eddie says rubbing the corners of the box with the calloused pads on his thumbs, “this doesn’t feel like a puppy.” 
  “You poor boy,” you tease with a shove to his shoulder, and a kiss to his cheek, “how will you ever live?” 
  Eddie tears the paper with a hook of his finger where the tape joins the pieces, wet tendrils of hair dripping water marks onto the wrapping, “it’ll be hard but I think I’ll manage.” 
  Biting your lip in anticipation you watch as Eddie tears the paper in boyish glee. And you aren’t sure who’s smile is wider when he finally opens the small rectangle shaped box. 
  It took awhile to save up for it. Cutting countless heads of hair in the renovated room above Master Mechanic’s, the auto shop Eddie co-owned with Wayne in Bridgeport, and earning a small wage by cleaning houses for a few hours on the weekends. 
  But every scrubbed toilet, every rolled perm rod was worth it when Eddie opened his present. 
  “It's about time you saw them live, yeah?” 
  Tickets to Metallica, the same gift. But this time with the promise of actually going and witnessing their magic. 
  “Oh baby,” Eddie nearly cried, running his fingers over the inked words carefully, he set the tickets down on the comforter and wrapped his hands around your waist pulling you into him, “why are you so good to me?” 
  And just like the first time he asked you, years ago, before you were his and he was yours. When you were just roommates exchanging gifts on Christmas. You told him what you should have then. 
  but you don’t fight to find the words anymore, or wonder if it’ll sound dumb. Everything you've been through with Eddie you could never imagine living life with anyone other than him. 
  The words come easy, and it’s one of the truest things you’ve ever said. 
  “Because you’re a good man. Because you’re the reason I wake up smiling every morning. Because I have never loved anyone the way that I love you, and I’ll always, always regret not telling you sooner.” 
  Eddie smiles with a quivering lip and you lean down to wipe the tears from his eyes, his arms wrap around you tight like a vice grip.
  Looking into his eyes, he somehow looked better with every year passing, truly aging like fine wine, and you were drunk on him.
   “Don’t cry on your birthday baby, it’s supposed to be a party,” you smile warmly at him, bringing his chin up a bit
so you can press a gentle kiss to his lips. 
  Pulling you into him so you’re straddling his hips, he whispers an I love you into your ear with your real name attached at the end, all satiny on his breath like a Hershey kiss.
  You don’t hear your God given name very often, having hated it for as long as you remember. Stubbornly telling everyone at a young age that your name was Tooty. Even writing it on all of your school papers as early as kindergarten. 
  But when Eddie said it, it set your soul on fire. Like a secret kept finally being told. Like another wall breaking down with him holding the sledge hammer. Like the first bite of a warm brownie from the oven. It felt good. 
  He presses slow kisses into your neck and moves his large hands to rock your hips against him, “you’re never gonna get rid of me, you know that right?” 
  “Fuck I hope not,” you whisper as you nip at his bare  shoulder,  “I made your favorite cake for tonight and everything.” 
  “Mmm,” Eddie purrs against the column of your throat, “strawberry?” 
  Gathering skin between your teeth you suck a small bruise into his pale neck, tongue swirling soft then firm, his pretty noises filling the bedroom walls. 
  “Yep,” you breathe with swollen lips, and popping the ‘p’, “extra frosting.”
  “Lady evil at it again,” Eddie teases, capturing your lips into a hungry kiss, his hands scoring down your back and bringing your hips impossibly closer to where you were both aching. 
  You giggle as he breaks away, and tickles your sides. He flips you onto the bed. The bulb of his nose wedging between your neck and shoulder as his hips hold you in place, his fingers dig into your armpits, and your ribs. 
  You laugh until your face is red and your neck is slick and painted with a stain of raspberry teeth marks and the lap of his tongue licking the bites better. 
  He gives you a wicked grin, out of breath and his lips swollen, his demeanor changes into something serious. 
He holds his hand on your cheek, sweeping your skin delicately with the pad of his thumb, holding you so gently as if you were made of porcelain, “I’m gonna make you my wife.” 
  Your fingernails scratch lightly down his chest, skipping over the tattoo of little angel wings and a halo for the unborn child you didn’t get the luxury of holding, matching the one on your inner arm. The date etched below in Eddie’s own handwriting. 
  It wasn’t the only new tattoo he had gotten since that day.
  He also had a mockup of a cartoon lady, devil horns on her head and a long black demon tail wagging behind her, that sat on his bicep. A pout identical to yours on her pretty little face, arms crossed in a fit.  ‘my girl’ in old English font beneath her little stiletto heels. 
  Your fingertips trace the lines of blank ink on his chest. And you lift your eyes to his. 
  Opening your soul to him for the millionth time, spreading its wings and joining with his into that dream land he swore he’d take you to, dancing on the rings of Saturn, bathing in the springs of Jupiter. 
  He smiles softly and so do you, heart soaring and beating fast, “about damn time,” you whisper softly just before his lips close around yours.
  Although your life would never be the same after that awful day, the one you were crafting and coloring outside the straight black lines with Eddie by your side, was pretty damn great. 
  And you wouldn’t change a thing.
🤧
🏷️
@bebe07011 @dashingdeb16 @hiscrimsonangel @luxaeterna13 @enam3l
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anistarrose · 26 days ago
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Some interesting locations, phrases, and visuals from the end of today's Drawtectives episode! (moderate visual spoilers for Midnight Alley below!)
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[ID from alt: spread shot of Midnight Alley and its businesses with neon signs. On the left, there's "Bug Bites" graffiti and the "Night Owl Books" store, and on the right, there's "Keeper's Guild," "Papa's Pizza," and the "Night Hotel". End ID.]
First off, there's lot of businesses that were alluded to in other parts of the cinematic — Night Owl Books, the Night Hotel, and Papa's Pizza, the latter of which was also in the trailer. I assume they're probably future locations being previewed here!
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[ID from alt: a hand turning on a lamp, next to a brochure titled "Night Hotel." A "We're open!" sign, in the window of a bookstore decorated with owl posters. A food service booth window opening, with a menu overhead. End ID.]
The other interesting thing to me is the "Bug Bites" graffiti, on the left side of the alley. (It gets cut off once, but the second appearance makes it clear what it says.) That said, I don't know if it's actually graffiti, or just a stylistic choice for advertising another venue of Midnight Alley! It does seem to be leading inside a doorway (the one with the mushrooms), and in another shot, there's a group of people dressed in varying degrees of sexy bug costumes:
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[ID from alt: a person with a fly mask, a shirtless person with a beetle mask and a harness, a wheelchair-using person with a black antennae headband, and a person in a white leotard with a moth antennae headband. End ID.]
Both "Bug Bites" and "Night Owl Books" have a nocturnal animal motif. This compares to the already obvious "snake" and "rat" motifs throughout the city — are they just for fun, or are they competing factions? I assume probably not, since the Alley cares so much about community, but there could always be a few outliers... Rats seem evocative of Midnight Alley as a whole, while "A snake has entered the rats' nest" implies the snake represents the antagonist.
Anyways, there's a lot of recurring posters throughout the city, but this one in particular is inexplicably everywhere and it makes me laugh. It seems almost threatening. He will teach you gittern!
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[ID from alt: a poster titled "Dan Stitch Will Teach You Gittern." There's a man holding a stringed instrument who looks eerily like a stock photo. The poster is seen in multiple places. End ID.]
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xxgoblin-dumplingxx · 11 months ago
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I’m loving so much the new disowned verse omg, it is so good, you are a genius.
But I’m curious, how did reader and jason met?
The apartment was in a cracker box of a building with thin walls. His neighbors were a young couple that fought about money 25/8 and an elderly 'Nam Vet who liked his porno but- he could cope.
It was different than Gotham. There weren't constant gunshots. And that was weird. But. He knew better than to think his PI license wouldn't make him some money. Even out in the sticks. There was always a contentious divorce. There was always something not quite right. Cops in over their heads.
And he'd have down time. He could read. Work on his bike. Fuck. Maybe even actually go see a movie... Sure. He knew eventually he'd get bored but. For now, he was looking forward to it.
He shut the door and locked it behind him, frowning just slightly and making a note to get a better lock while he was out. He doubted he could find anything super great in town- he'd probably have to order something but. He'd passed a hardware store in town so... it might be worth checking out. If he made friends with the old guy that probably ran it he could probably get some special orders if he needed it.
So he set off that direction, wandering on foot down the sidewalks and taking note of the other houses. It was the middle of the afternoon. And the lunch whistles at the old factory still sounded at nood and then 30 minutes later. Tucked away from the tree-lined main drag, the houses back here varied from run down to better homes and gardens.
That tracked.
They got better closer to the front. The older show homes outweighed the eyesores. American primitive lawn decor. A surprising number of pineapples- and he snorted, wondering if it had come from a big box store or if it was a signal. Or both.
Still.
By the time he made it to the hardware store, he was reasonably certain he could stay busy. All was not as Leave it to Beaver as the Town Council would have you believe. And the first place he was gonna leave a flyer was in the beauty shop. Those old biddies HAD to have some shit to stir up.
He shouldered the door open and a bell, an actual bell, chimed. And he smiled a little taking a deep breath. The smell of dust, tools, and old well-maintained wood hit his nose and he exhaled. Definitely not going to find any high tech locks here. But, he had a soft spot for independent shops.
"Be with you in a minute!"
The voice made him jump. Not the gruff voice of a grumpy old fuck he expected. And it made him search of the source. Curious. "No worries," he said, walking a little farther towards where he'd heard it. Finding a young woman on a ladder stocking some boxes of bolts on a shelf. A pink canvas gardening apron tied around her hips to hold more boxes. "You got door locks?" he asked.
"Aisle 5 next to the paver catalogs," you tell him, steadying yourself so you can turn and glance down at him.
"Perfect," he said, "Thanks."
"Mhm, let me know if you need anything else," you tell him.
Jason paused and looked around, "Think you can put a tool box together for me I just moved and-"
"Ah, yeah. One Bachelor special," you tell him," Jumping down from the ladder, "I think I can get you fixed up. At least enough to get you started. You'll be smashing your thumbs in no time."
"Got a first aid kit too?"
"Right up at the counter," you snort. "But if you want anything special, you gotta see Adam at the Pharmacy. Mine are pretty basic."
"I can deal with basic- at least until you sell me a band saw-"
"Oh lord."
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genderqueerdykes · 3 months ago
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hi, im on partially diy hrt for nearly a year. i do not leave in the usa btw.
i buy the drugs from just some guy who deals it, i learned about him from one of my trans male friends, if you want to start diy hrt really consider asking if someone in your community does it also. i live in a country where lgbt+ and transitioning is practically outlawed, but there is still community out there, especially in big cities (over 1m people).
but if he dissapears i turn to resources for cis bodybuilders. idk it's pretty googleable, ive checked. again, always ask people in your country.
check your local laws, where i live buying t illegally isnt punished if the drug is bought from your country (its not contraband) and you do not plan to sell it. in this case if someone IS going to be punished, its your dealer.
for safety: check the ingredients of what's your buying, in the best case you should buy a drug that is the exact same as in drug stores, also ask what other people in your shoes are usually buying.
also if you can - buy in bulk. rn me and my partner have 9 months worth of t on our hands. this way you have more time to find other dealer if yours dissapears, and also it's much cheaper often.
also gel is generally WAY EASIER to buy without a prescription (even though you need it on paper)! many drug stores don't ask for a prescription to buy it, and you can go to multiple of them. also if you preorder it online and only go to the drug store to pick it up they are less likely to ask for the prescription. it's all still not 100%, but at least you don't have to look for a dealer or a bodybuilder website
needles are usually pretty cheap and do not require a prescription in a drug store. if you NEED to make something up why you need them - some of the common pain killers come in the form of injections
so, about the blood tests and stuff like that!
personally, i consult with an endocrinologist approximately onse a year, but i don't have any complications. you can make a visit online with a t friendly endocrinologist from another country - this won't show on any of your medical records and doesn't bare any legal weight. this way they can't write you a prescription, but thos us about diy hrt anyway.
ask about what tests you need to have done beforehand!
you can do all the tests in a private clinic and not tell them anything about your trans status. mostly they don't care. it costs money, but its more safe
but also you can tell some bullshit in the government clinic so they prescribe you some of the tests, at least the most general stuff. if they prescribe you to return with the results or go to an endocrinologist - you can just ignore that and JUST NOT GO. they are most probably very busy and understaffed, they dont care.
you should find a general guide to what levels of what you generally should have. id link what i use, but its all in a language other then english.
generally all of the things should be in the norm, except for testosterone and estradiol. prolactin should be in the norm.
of course it varies a lot and might be different for you if you have other health stuff going on, that's the reason you should consult with a doctor if you can. but it is possible on your own.
i really think people are way too scared of diy t many times. this therapy is often very straightforward, and there ARE ways to do it, you can even consult with a doctor while transitioning illegally. where i live transitioning, whether legal or medical is outlawed, but plenty people do it anyway. be careful and midfull, but go for it
sorry if my english isnt very good, i don't use it irl and its my second language
thank you so much for your help and don't worry, your english is plenty good for this kind of thing! thank you for all the help, if you think of any more information you wish to share feel free to ask!
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