#look DnD has magic anything can happen

[halfricanloveyou]

yeah. like with harry potter. i read that shit and it was boring as hell. pacing was slow for no reason. characters were predictable and 2-D. little focus on cool wizard battles. written by a racist terf (who i hope dies so she stops actively spending her harry potter money to keep human rights laws from being passed).

twilight held my interest better and i didn’t even like reading those books but at least i felt compelled to see where the fuck that plot was going. (but i also hate that racist author and think she fucking sucks at writing. what the fuck was that plot tho? shoulda ended it at book one.)

the movie? cool wizard battles. actors who weren’t terfs. different directors and writers who emotion put into lines that weren’t there in the book. still didn’t like them that much but at least there was some cool wizard shit to look at i guess.

the reason that isn’t true is because sometimes authors…aren’t good.

book to movie adaptations generally suck, but reblog with ur exception in the tags

[emptyjunior]

mazey and fig's deep dive into the core of Bard Magic literally literally was so good, I'm foaming at the mouth thinking of it?

Like do you level up your bard powers by levelling up your craft? By becoming an accomplished technical musician or a professional level dancer?

Or is it about the feeling? And your magic gets stronger as you practice simply because there's effort and time being put into this act of creation. It's about your pursuit of excellence in your craft, which only coincidentally happens to express itself as fame and technical perfection.

But it doesn't have to for a lot of people!

Like I think in the magical world of dnd, a proficient and powerful bard can look like anything!

Maybe somebody's great uncle on the bayou, who sits in his rocking chair playing banjo all day every day, is nameless to the world, can't read music, would be an absolutely Deadly bard because he has that compatibility with his music. He has a deep and profound connection with it.

Someone who's the life of the party, spends all their time thinking about stand up material just for the benefit of their friends, is a sparkling conversationalist with incredible comedic timing everytime, for them that Is the top of what they want their craft to be. There is troves of magic being created there, and it's coming from their connection to people and willingness to entertain.

A kid playing hopscotch on the street, coming up with more and more elaborate steps and jumps. A hospice carer who sings lullabies for the elderly, using their songs as pain relief. Two best friends who have paddy cake down to a practiced artform where they can Double their attacks if they do it together.

I just loved them talking about the realities of what Bard Magic would look like in the real world, asking if she should be worried about her rockstar career because that's her craft, but then thinking is my loyalty to some label even the music?! Because surely that's not the music, that's not where the magic is.

Just bard magic existing because people have so much raw emotion and power when we create and entertain, when we Sing and Dance for each other that of course in a magical world there is power to be drawn from that.

[randoimago]

I've seen this really silly dnd character meme where it's a warlock whose patron is their parent 😂. So can I ask for Percy cr campaign 1, Fjord cr campaign 2, Gale and Wyll's baldurs gate 3 reaction to their warlock s/o's patron being their dad?

S/O's Patron is Their Dad

Fandom: Critical Role // Baldur's Gate 3

Character(s): Percy De Rolo, Fjord Tough, Gale Dekarios, Wyll Ravengard

Type of Request: Headcanons

Note(s): God the chaos that would happen from this. Especially with the Critical Role characters, it'd just be wild.

Percy

He didn't realize that was a possibility. If he was younger, he would've struck as many deals as possible if it meant his family were still with him. Patrons or not. There's just a touch of bitterness from Percy, but his default mode is bitch so you can't really tell.

Percy doesn't really change anything that he does when he learns that your father is your patron. He has questions, sure, but he's not going to suddenly try and win favors. He's sure your father has other things to do than constantly watch over you.

Sorry if kissing is a bit awkward for you, but Percy isn't going to deny himself the taste of your lips just because daddy dearest might be looking in (he'll have some choice words though).

Fjord

Oh he is sweating when he learns that your father is your patron. Does that mean he's always watching? Is Fjord going to be struck down if he even looks at you in a less than platonic way?

Seriously being so polite and stiff with you for a bit after he learns before he remembers all the things you both have already done and the flirtations that passed between you. And then thinking, "Oh hells, did your dad see that?!"

Seriously, you're going to have to be the one to reassure Fjord and talk to him that your dad isn't constantly watching. You get your magic from him, sure, but he's not constantly around so Fjord doesn't have to keep his eyes and hands to himself.

Gale

Well that's an interesting perdicament you're in. Can't help but ask how that happened. Did your parent die and as a way to not leave you alone, they became a patron somehow? Perhaps you're mixed with some Fey or Fiend or Other Worldly being? Maybe it's-

Seriously, he could just go and on with theories as to how that happened. Especially if you have no idea how it happened, he will get to the bottom of this because it's fascinating to him.

If your patron father does pop in at some point, Gale is sure to give a smile and introduce himself and promise that he's taking good care of you. Would probably pout a bit if your dad doesn't like him, but he can summon magic cats so Gale is sure he'll win your dad over yet!

Wyll

He can't help but find some amusement in the situation. Your father is your patron while his father pretty much kicked him out due to his own patron. It's an interesting situation too.

Now and then Wyll does ponder if perhaps you're part something else. Just because most patrons he knows are fey, fiends, or some otherwordly entity. With how happy you make him, he doubts your father could be some kind of devil.

While he can see why having your father as your patron isn't optimal, he would certainly have taken that over his own patron. But he tries not to be bitter and does his best to be a good boyfriend, hoping your father doesn't mind if he shares a few late night dances with you.

Taglists: @reo-the-leo @unhelpfulnpc

[bunchashapes]

as per your previous ask -- what's your favorite idea for a "twist" on conventional fantasy tropes/races/etc. either in a setting you're working on or just as a one-off thought that has entertained you.

this question is from a while back and i keep forgetting to answer it. i will happily take this opportunity to soapbox about my own setting so allow me a moment to talk about elves. or more specifically, dragons.

Dragons are basically extinct in modern times, but people still recognize them as they appear in legends; big scaly guys with regal wings, covered head to toe in scales, capable of exerting overwhelming elemental power. While this isn’t untrue, dragons are actually more legend than beast. “Dragon” more accurately describes a power that supersedes biology or even life itself. The very IDEA of dragons is an interminable force of nature. As such, anything can BECOME a dragon. A city-shattering hurricane with enough momentum can become a dragon, as can say, an exploding star (even a particularly angry swarm of bees, given enough determination, can become a dragon).

So what happens when ancient humans attempted to attune to draconic magic themselves? That’s where you get Elves! Long-lived, elegant, and intimately familiar with magic, the first elves were the result of an attempt to ascend to dragonhood, some more successful than others. In fact, especially long-lived and powerful elves can grow even closer to dragonhood, taking on any number of dragon-like qualities (this is where you’d slot in dnd-style dragonborn, except these would be EXCEEDINGLY rare) and under the right circumstances, an elf can even pass the threshold to dragonhood…

In terms of visual design, elves are pretty standard fare with the long ears and all (they tend to have long necks like elves in divinity) but also have the potential to have tails! The more “true” an elf, the more unnervingly slender and draconic they look, but in the context of say, a ttrpg, this just means you get a lot of little options for what type of elf you want. anyway that’s elves :)

[vitaeplaysda]

Finally a complete set with all my planned Rooks! It's just a first take, depending on the CC and the game and how I will feel in the next months they will change for sure. Also the clothing is all random. Purple because... it's Rook. Time to go back to Elgar'dad, commissions and other artworks. I will talk about them under the cut!

◆ Nadir "Lil'Rook" Lavellan

Elf ◆ Transmasc nonbinary ◆ he/they Antivan Crows ◆ Orb/Knife Mage (Spellblade)

My little baby, my firstborn, the first Rook I designed. Used to work as a lil kid in Skyhold's kitchen, until he met the demon Enfenim in that abandoned library hidden there, befriending him (it's another OCs of mines, check my pinned!)

Long story short he gets adopted by my Lavellan after his magic manifested, in the kitchens. Near boiling oil. The left side of his face and shoulder is covered in burn scars. Still he grows up to be a great but VERY unlucky mage, to the point he considers himself bad news and slowly starts to embrace this side of him in a selfdeprecating way. After yet another incident, he leaves her mother and their community, deciding he wants to make just one single good thing for her: finding Solas. Hiding his identity he ends up joining the crows, finding out he's quite good as an assassin. Relationship wise I brutally ship him with Elgar'nan, but more specifically he's in a weird... double triangle romboid (?) relationship with also Sulenan and Bellara??? (aka Sulenan also has a relationship with all of them but Bellara and Elgar'nan don't deal with each other.... unless the game will state otherwise >:D) He's hella young, in his early twenties, but usually fakes his age and tries to pass as someone older. He's also the shortest elf you'll ever meet.

◆ Saara(?) "Rook"

Qunari ◆ female ◆ she/her Veil Jumpers ◆ Bow Rogue (Arcane Archer)

She's meant to be the real Rook, you know, the one who Varric recruits. Qunari who was taken in by a (very open minded) Dalish clan. I'm still unsure if she was born in the Qun or not, in any case she embraced the elven culture as her own. She can be considered diplomatic and understanding, a good bean. The idea behind her is linked to the Qunari having metallic like skin... I wanted to make a golden one since they're usually grey in games. I'm not sure about the name Saara just because I remembered now Sera has a very similar sound. We shall see if I'm going to change it.

◆ Sulenan

Elf ◆ Male ◆ he/him Shadow dragons ◆ Two handed Warrior (Slayer)

I idealized him as a... mortal form Elgar'nan would use to mingle and learn the hell has happened while he was gone but he became a whole unique character. A Liberati of dalish origin, he's one of the angriest characters I have, hating humans for what they've done to his people and their rotten society, hating the chantry for its comforting lies, hating the elvhen gods because... well apparently they're evil now. In the end he's just very lost and heartbroken, desiring only for things to get better. Alas he's also practical and knows you gotta make your hands dirty if you wanna achieve anything. Headcanon wants Elgar'nan can control him through Vallaslin, I also fantasized about Sulenan sharing the same blood of his god. He feels comforted by Bellara's presence tho, his "Official" relationship it's going to be with her. For the headcanon chaotic one check LilRook above 👀

◆ Anarca

Qunari ◆ Agender nonbinary ◆ they/them in game but any pronoun works Mourn Watch ◆ Staff Mage (Deathcaller)

It's just... chaotic. Take the Dnd core rules and turn them into a person. They're unpredictable, at times taking a kind choice, while another time they will act in scary ways. It isn't like they don't like rules and push against them, for Anarca rules simply aren't part of their world. Beside their peculiar behavior, Anarca loves to experiment but mostly they want to have *fun*. You want to see the skeletons dance? You'll have that. Look wise people are always scared as they're extremely tall, most of their face half covered by hair with just their horns poking out.

◆ Veronica

Elf-blooded Human ◆ Female ◆ she/her Grey Wardens ◆ Shield Warrior (Champion)

Melancholic gal whom had to join the wardens in order to survive not so different from the Hero of Ferelden and also the token human (?) of this group. While she has a rooted sense of duty which made her a good warden, she still misses and fantasizes about the kind of life she would have gone through if she stayed among nobles, instead she had and still has to fight monsters and to come into terms with her Calling being closer than not. The idea was to have her romance Emmrich, letting her coming to term with the concept of death through him.

◆ Raibeart

Dwarf ◆ Male ◆ he/they Lords of Fortune ◆ Daggers Rogue (Sabouter)

The cheerful and funny guy of the group but also the most clueless one. Honestly he doesn't know why he joined the Veilguard... he probably doesn't even know he's part of the Veilguard. Still, he isn't one to ask complex questions to himself or others, somehow he's able to work with whatever is at hand, navigating through every situation, hopefully bringing a smile on people's face in the meanwhile. He's goofy but still charismatic and enthusiastic, a disney princess in the body of a burly pirate drawf.

[raeynbowboi]

HOW TO PLAY AS THE BELCHERS IN DND 5E

Today, we're going to explore how to build the Belchers as a DnD Party. Plus Teddy. We're not really going to touch on stats. Let's be honest, the Belchers aren't really great at anything. If we were building them accurately, they'd all be super low level and/or with terrible stats. But it's your character and your campaign, so you can make them more or less optimized as you see fit. They're also all basic Humans, so we're pretty much just focusing on their classes and subclasses.

BOB BELCHER

PALADIN OATH OF DEVOTION

Bob is largely defined by his principles and values. As Tina puts it, Bob is a good business owner, but a bad businessman. He cares more about providing a quality service and succeeding his way than making money. And in Little Hard Dad, he's shown to say "It's the principle of it" way too often. This to me reads as a Paladin. Given his belief in quality service and moral principles, I label him as an Oath of Devotion Paladin.

VARIANT BUILD

FIGHTER SAMURAI ARCHETYPE

Bob is pretty boring and straightforward, which makes Fighter really fitting for his personality. If he was going to model himself after anyone, he'd choose Shinji Kojima/Hawk. Thus, the Samurai archetype. However, if we're leaning purely into the boring practicality and straightforwardness of Bob, I might suggest Champion instead. It's the most Fighter-y Fighter you can build.

Regardless of his class, make sure to pick up proficiency with Cook's Utensils or the Chef Feat.

LINDA BELCHER

BARD COLLEGE OF DANCE

Telling Linda Belcher not to sing or dance is like telling Tina not to talk about horses or telling Bob not to cook. It's just not going to happen. She loves the theater, she sings all the time, and she was once in an amateur garage band. All the makings of a classic bard. Given her love of dancing, I went with the College of Dance.

TINA BELCHER

CLERIC LIFE DOMAIN

Tina is the family member who puts the most stock in things like fate, true love, karma, and damnation. She is also one of the characters that mentions religion more than anyone else. More specifically, she strikes me as a Cleric of Sune, the Faerunian Goddess of Love and Beauty. Sune's virtues include following your heart wherever it leads, championing love and romance at all costs, taking any risk in pursuit of love, being true to your heart and your passions without shame, and trying to make the world a more beautiful place. As such, Tina is the perfect candidate for a Cleric of Sune. Sune has two domains: Life and Light. Given that Tina has at least some interest in nursing, the Life Domain seems more in-line with Tina's values as a follower of Sune.

GENE BELCHER

SORCERER WILD MAGIC ORIGIN

I know, I know. It's a sin that he's not a Bard. But Gene and Linda are very similar characters, and both work as Bards. The best thing for a party is diversity. So, I looked at Gene's personality beyond just his music. And the core of Gene is whacky nonsense. Usually, when Gene tells stories, it's an excuse for weird imagery. The Banana-fullo, Fart School, radioactive pizza sauce. Thus, the Wild Magic origin for Sorcerers spoke to me. Gene loves whacky randomness, so he would be drawn to Wild Magic. Plus, he's not really a good bard. He hates practicing, he's unfamiliar with the concept of a workbook, and kind of just expects a music career to be handed to him. Hell, when he got cast in a play and had all of two lines, he didn't memorize them, and wanted to ad lib every take. Gene's a sorcerer with the Entertainer background, but he is NOT a bard. He doesn't take his craft seriously the way Linda does.

LOUISE BELCHER

ROGUE ASSASSIN ARCHETYPE

One of Louise's main skills is her ability to pick locks. Bob is literally afraid to go into her room as he expects boobie traps to hurt him. She's a clever tactician, masterminding several heists and revenge schemes. She's good at tricking people and lying to their faces to get what she wants. As for why she's an assassin, in the episode where Louise is uncertain of her future, one vignette paints as a John Wick style Wedgie-Sassin. She's also a fan of Francine, a Special Girl doll that spied on the Russians during the Cold War. She's not typically a fan of girly things, but she does like the one that's a spy. She's definitely the family member who would be the outlaw punk of the group.

RANGER GLOOMSTALKER CONCLAVE

In more recent seasons, we've seen a newfound interest in archery, with Louise even making a zombie movie centered around her blossoming hobby. The Gloomstalker/Assassin multiclass is also a very good multiclass in combat, which is why I felt it was the most fitting for Louise. She's also pretty accurate with other ranged combat like spitballs and throwing things at people.

TEDDY THE HANDYMAN

ARTIFICER BATTLE SMITH

This one pretty much goes without saying. He's a mechanic and handyman, he's used to moving and hauling heavy objects, plus he's burly, making him a great fit for the party's tank. The Battle Smith is an artificer built for the front line, and they get to be joined by a mechanical ally. Teddy would absolutely take a hit for any of the Belchers. The guy also fell off a roof and walked it off, so he's definitely got the highest Constitution score of the group.

I think this party turned out alright. Bob and Teddy are on the frontlines, Linda and Tina are the primary support, Gene is a ball of pure chaos and uncontrolled energy, and Louise is sniping people from the shadows. Everyone's doing what they should be doing to work as a unit, and also happen to be a fairly well-balanced party as well. This is an especially good party for low stakes and silly campaigns, but probably not the kind of party you want to bring to Barovia or Avernus.

[alexitheslayer02]

My Inane OC Ramblings

Why are Ning Yun and Wukong are a thing? Cause I said so! Okay, in all seriousness from a story standpoint. I do adhere to the same headcanon this person @newkatzkafe2023 has. That if someone gives Wukong a run for his money in a fight, that he will interested. One look at Ning Yun's design and people will no doubt have questions as to how in any world Ning Yun can apply to this rule XD Fair question (that no one asked). Your friendly neighborhood fox and monkey lover shall explain.

------------------- I always tend to look through an RPG lens, cause I'm a gamer girl as well as writer hhh So *pulls out DnD stats* How I see it- Wukong has most of his stat points in strength, dexterity, and a few in arcane and intelligence. Ning Yun's stat points are mostly in arcane, intelligence, and wisdom with a few in dexterity. Polar opposites. Basically the classic warrior and wizard/sorcerer tag team. Also take in mind, I don't know how many people heard of this show, so if you know, you know. Ning Yun is basically my Frieren. (Kinda funny, since that anime has "Beyond Journey's End" in the title) Ning Yun was the Archivist for the Celestials. His library contained thousands to millions of books and tomes from across the known, and unknown, world, gathered by his fox spirits, right at his fingertips. Ning Yun is certainly not stupid. So of freaking course he would take advantage of this. Studying these books cover to cover, time and again, often repeatedly. Imagine all the books on the occult, on magic, on the practices the invoke such magic. Ning Yun, having lived for centuries to millennia, has practiced, perfected, and even fine tuned what he has learned, like Frieren in her respective world. Now, the magic in Jttw is kinda... hard to grasp sometimes for me personally. From what I gather, it is deeply rooted in Chinese philosophies (Taoism is one of the ones mentioned, the other I keep forgetting, please remind me. I think it was Daoism?). I don't know a lot about Chinese culture, I am still learning. So what I take from is mainly from media related to it, like Black Myth or Wo Long, mainly Wo Long. So that is my main reference. Yes, I said that Ning Yun's main specialty is illusion and shapeshifting. Those are his default skills as a fox spirit turned celestial fox. (from research I learned that in folklore, foxes are often associated with illusions and shapeshifting. And yes, I also know they are commonly associated with women. According to what I looked up, SOME legends speak of male foxes in Chinese lore. Either way THIS IS FICTION!!)

From his library, he gained more magic. Sealing, offensive, curses, and so on. So, what about a fight? Firstly, depends on what you mean by fight. Are we talking duel? Sparring? Fight to the death? If duel, what are the rules? If the rules restrict magic, Ning Yun is getting his ass beat, no question about that. If it restricts hand to hand or with weapons, then Wukong might face defeat (if he follows those rules that is). Sparring with both holding back? I don't know. Fight to the death. Wukong can't die XD Ning Yun will get worn out and get himself beat. But in all seriousness, it depends on how they both take that fight. They have their own strategies. If Wukong gets touched, and Ning Yun thinks fast, Wukong might be faced with one of Ning Yun's direct nightmare illusions, and find himself fighting a mental breakdown >:) (if you read my thing about that, then you know exactly what I am talking about) Again, it all depends on how they react to each other and their respective capabilities. Anything can happen in a fight. Ning Yun is at a physical disadvantage. His strategic thinking and magical capabilities however, could win Wukong's respect however.

[spacebarbarianweird]

Hi, saw your Archfey warlock headcanons and since I made a foul mouthed elven durge who was a great old one warlock can I have some headcanons for Astarion x Great Old One Warlock? Wrote that the eldritch patron relies on her making blood offerings for their pact.

I am playing the Great Old One Warlock in one the DnD campaigns and I am a sucker for Lovecraftian Horror! Couldn't resist to write it!

There is a list o Great Old Ones you can choose as your patron. Ghaunadaur, Dendar, Zargon, Kezef, Moander. All equally ancient, evil and insane.

Masterlist

Headcanons

Astarion x Great Old One Warlock!Tav

Your patron is a mysterious entity whose nature is completely alien to the fabric of reality.

Unkillable and utterly insane.

An eldritch abomination.

You have been cursed with the pact when you were a child.

Something saved your life and made you a warlock.

Erasing your memories in the process.

You have no idea who your patron is.

What is the price of your abilities?

And what will happen to you once you are in debt?

You were cast away from your home.

"You reek of unimaginable horrors," the elders said. "Begone!"

You want to suppress your magic, you don't want to use it.

But here and there you have to protect yourself.

And the creature you belong to grants more and more spells for you to use.

Phantasmal Force, Dominate Person, Summon Aberrations...

In exchange, you lose your sanity.

The madness grasps your mind and forces you to do awful things - murdering, torturing, and using the most disgusting spells on people you love.

By the time you are kidnapped, you've become a hermit, barely speaking to anyone for ages.

"You have this aura of desperation," Astarion notices, trying to get past your guard.

"No way," you bitterly chuckle.

But you like having someone by your side, to forget madness at least for a night.

The patron casts nightmares upon you forcing you to see the Abyss and dimensions so terrifying a mortal mind can't apprehend it.

One night you wake up restrained in Astarion's tent.

The vampire looks terrible, he has burns and bruises, and his hand is broken.

You attacked him in your madness and he barely survived.

"Now you tell me everything. Everything you know," he orders.

You want a break-up. You can't let him die from your hands. He won't become a sacrifice to your evil master.

He brushes it all off. He will help you. You are in this together.

But you need to find who is your master.

Astarion teaches you Abyssal - the language of the evil deities and demons of the Abyss.

"I actually was thinking to summon one of those evil bastards to set myself free. But the language is so profane and cursed I never dared to use it."

You fear to see your master. You have been looking for answers all your life but you know you won't like them.

You make a treaty with Rafael to betray the Emperor but once you try to sign the papers with your blood, the devil refuses to keep the deal.

"You are already bound with the force I don't want to have anything in common. Cazador's profane ritual is just fae magic in comparison with your servitude."

But you can't allow the Emperor to control the Absolute.

You summon your patron, spewing words in Abyssal.

The world around you disappears.

You are floating in the primal darkness.

And you finally see it.

Your master.

Zargon.

The Devourer in the Depths, the Invincible Tyrant.

You aren't told the reasons, the purpose. It's all beyond your comprehension.

You are given the powers to save the world from Mindflayers, but it comes with a price.

Zargon the Returner is back to the Prime.

With you as its loyal devotee and priest.

You lose yourself to madness.

You remember who you are. Who you were. But there is nothing left of the person Astarion fell in love with.

You are someone utterly evil, someone he can't even recognize.

"Are you even the one I loved?"

You force him to stay with you. You can do it as Zargon's warlock.

You stripe Astarion of his freedom, his free will, making him your consort and forcing him to see the horrors you at your patron's orders.

He runs away. At least once a year. You let him do it before sending one of your slaves after him.

"It's not real you. It's not you"

Decades pass and the cult of Zargon spreads through Faerun with its unholy rituals.

Astarion still hopes the person you once was is locked somewhere. He just needs to set you free.

Even if it means challenging the Great Old One.

--

Tag list

@tugoslovenka @marcynomercy @wintersire @vixstarria @not-so-lost-after-all @ashiro20 @theearthsfinalconfession @herstxrgirl @starlight-ipomoea @micropoe10 @astarion-imagine-archive @veillsar @elora-the-slutty-songstress @fayeriess @lumienyx @tallymonster @caitlincat-95 @tragedybunny @valeprati @lynnlovesthestars @marina-and-the-memes @waking-electric @ayselluna @connorsui @asterordinary @darkarchangel96 @locallegume @brainfullofhotsauce @coffeeanddonutscafe

[markerofthemidnight]

Abstracted Heart, Mind and Soul

Art I kinda pushed out of an AU/concept that I need someone to write for me because I have too many WIPs.

I call this the “Abstraction AU” (unrelated to the Amazing Digital Circus, but does share some similarities), and here’s how it works:

The Basics

Inspired by Core Suppressions from Lobotomy Corporation

Basically, whenever one of the three undergoes extreme stress, they “Abstract” into one of these forms

The Headspace basically stops working the way it’s supposed to until the transformation is reversed: the way it’s affected depends on who’s Abstracting

The transformation only wears off once the side passes out: which sounds like it would result in a big boss fight or something

BUT, luckily for them, since Abstracting is basically letting out all your emotions and strength and fighting with all you’ve got, it is EXHAUSTING

so once it’s happened they’re typically not conscious for any more than an hour

Contrary to what you might guess at first, the side is still “themselves” while Abstracting: it’s just difficult to tell since the stress that causes the transformation also makes them act irrational and overly violent

Despite this, post-transformation, the side typically doesn’t have memories of what happened during the fight… until a few hours after waking up

It can happen to the same person more than once, but to Abstract for the first time you have to be pushed PARTICULARLY far

After that it gets a bit easier for it to happen again, like you’ve given into your inner monster

To further emphasise that, they all get “battle scars” from their first time Abstracting that stay with them for the rest of their lives

And to go into what the first time abstracting was like for each individual:

Heart

Abstraction is usually caused by intense stress.

While this is still true in Heart’s case, since being emotional is his job description, he needs to be pushed further than the others in order to Abstract

(because if that wasn’t the case, he would Abstract all the time)

Anyways, his first time probably came after days on end of extreme trauma

Specifically, trauma that neither Mind nor Soul did anything to try and stop

He likely Abstracted out of view from the others, and they didn’t even notice until Soul was like “wait why isn’t my trident working”

As Heart is… the heart of the Headspace, when he Abstracts, magic stops working there

His design was obviously based off of biblically accurate angels, as well as a Beholder from DND but without eyes so it would look like a heart

You’d think he’d be biased towards Mind while like that, but no- he goes after Soul.

He expected Mind to ignore him, but Soul? It’s his job to make sure things are alright with him, so why’d he just abandon him?

Even without the benefit of the Trident, though, I imagine Abstracted Heart wouldn’t be all too difficult for them to take down if they really tried their best, so he goes down rather quickly

After he wakes up, his head’s basically just in one big blur for a while until the memories start to come back

Then he just starts shaking and hugging them while constantly muttering apologies (even though he still has EVERY RIGHT to be mad)

”Battle scars” take the form of purple(-er) wings, fangs and a halo

Mind

Mind’s is a pretty different case

While his was also caused by days of repeated trauma, as Abstractions tend to be, his problem is that he kept trying to bottle it up and only started to show even the tiniest cracks just before the transformation

(after all, I don’t think they’d take a chance like that again after what happened with Heart)

He likely Abstracted right in front of Heart and Soul

His design was based off of UFOs, obviously, as well as a brain and spine. The eyelashes are meant to look like the sun’s rays

When he Abstracts, all laws of physics in the Headspace basically stop working and the place gets even weirder than normal

Despite having the advantage of Soul’s trident this time, taking him down is a lot harder since he’s metal: the key is to tire him out

When he wakes up after the fact, he’s even more of an asshole than usual, but mainly because he’s still tired and stressed

He gets all quiet once the memories start to come back to him though, like he feels bad about attacking them so violently but doesn’t really know how to express it

”Battle scars” take the form of rhombus-shaped pupils and back spikes

Soul

If you’re a time loop fan, then Soul Abstracting is typically what restarts the loop

He was designed to be the most humanoid to show that he was the closest to Whole, with three heads because… you know why

When he Abstracts, he fuses with his trident, the Headspace becomes black and white, and starts slowly to fall apart

Heart and Mind do not stand a CHANCE in this fight, hence why his Abstraction is inevitably what restarts the loop

However, if by some chance they lasted long enough for things to go back to normal, I imagine Soul would be… surprisingly nice after going back to normal

It’s like finally letting it all out made him calm down a bit. He’s still pretty awkward around them, but better than you might think

Even when the memories come back, sure he kinda shuts himself in for a bit and avoids talking about it, but he’s not as closed off as Mind is

Battle scars take the form of his right eye becoming normal (as in not identical to his left eye as seen in the art), and the left side of his face being covered in black (to match his face in his Abstracted form)

[y-rhywbeth2]

So, that last reblog about Ilmater and a few of your other cleric-related posts reminded me of a question/issue that has bugged me for a while and that I haven't found a good answer for. (Don't worry, it's not about BDSM, though I am very ??? about Ilmatari sexuality. But I digress.) As a more casual DnD player, I don't have many of the source books, so I mostly have to rely on what I can find on the internet, which is very … *gestures vaguely* let's say, hit or miss on reliable information. I also know there may not be a "canon" answer, even if just to leave room for DM/player shenanigans, but maybe you might know or have an opinion.

So, my understanding is that priests are people who enter the clergy (voluntarily or not) and learn the doctrines, how to perform rituals, etc., while clerics are basically people that a god points to and says "I want that one," and may not ever have or have had anything to do with the official clergy/religious hierarchy. But to me, it seems like the clergy would have some process to establish that a person who claims to be a cleric of their god is actually legit.

The extremist cult mentioned in that other post happened during the Time of Troubles, so that wasn't exactly normal circumstances, but it seems like that sort of thing would be a concern all the time. I know the gods aren't supposed to directly meddle in each other's affairs, but it seems like some of them would try anyway if they thought they could get away with it. (Looking at you, Shar.) And I'm sure there are plenty of other entities that would deceive, brainwash or mind-control a mortal into thinking they're a cleric so they can slander a god. A truth-serum doesn't seem like it would be enough, because the person may genuinely believe it.

To be honest, I haven't been able to find much at all about where clerics fit in with the clergy. I'm sure some gods would be fine empowering people who wanted to serve as long as they're doing the things the god's clergy or clerics do. Other gods, like Bane, no doubt demand that a cleric undergo training in doctrines, etc. and have a clearly established place in the hierarchy. But even beyond what the gods themselves feel about it, I imagine the clergy would want some verification process for anyone who would represent their faith.

Is this a thing, or are we just supposed to head-canon it however? I know it's a sort of nitpicky issue, but it seems like it would be important thing to know for anyone wanting to play a cleric -- for backstory reasons if nothing else!

(By the way, if you answer, I don't mind if you snip this ask into whatever pieces you want to respond to. I realize it's a little long.😔)

-

So, my understanding is that priests are people who enter the clergy (voluntarily or not) and learn the doctrines, how to perform rituals, etc., while clerics are basically people that a god points to and says "I want that one," and may not ever have or have had anything to do with the official clergy/religious hierarchy.

Everybody working at the temple doing the daily chores and dedicating themselves to a life of worship is a priest, but the priests in charge and the ones leading the rituals and speaking for the deity are the clerics (or druids). A cleric/druid does have to be part of the faith, and if a god wants this mortal as a cleric they’ll typically direct them towards the nearest actual cleric/druid and place of worship for that guidance and training. (Favoured/Divine Souls, as the spontaneous casters, are the annoying bastards who fuck up the hierarchy, but they’re rare. Don't need to follow the rules or pray for your god's power when you simply have it by existing.)

As far as I'm aware a god can't force a person to be a cleric/druid/paladin/ranger; divine magic requires some degree of faith and willingness to serve, even if for selfish reasons on the mortal end. They can bestow their power on a mortal, but the classes require a certain dedication. You can psychologically condition people into willingness though.

But to me, it seems like the clergy would have some process to establish that a person who claims to be a cleric of their god is actually legit.

For a random, already initiated priest you've never met before: Aside from a series of rites and secret handshakes or whatever - plus the assumption that few are going to be suicidal enough risk pissing off the gods - they do, it’s called asking the god.

The extremist cult mentioned in that other post happened during the Time of Troubles, so that wasn't exactly normal circumstances, but it seems like that sort of thing would be a concern all the time.

It kind of is is. Not even just enemy gods disguising themselves, but different religious leaders having different interpretations of the same deity.

I know the gods aren't supposed to directly meddle in each other's affairs, but it seems like some of them would try anyway if they thought they could get away with it. (Looking at you, Shar.) And I'm sure there are plenty of other entities that would deceive, brainwash or mind-control a mortal into thinking they're a cleric so they can slander a god. A truth-serum doesn't seem like it would be enough, because the person may genuinely believe it.

There’s a couple of factors, one being that pesky free will that mortals have to have, plus faith remains true to its definition (because even when gods are demonstrably real ‘I don’t need empirical evidence for what I believe in to believe in it’ still stands).

Even within a single faith there are heresies and splinter sects: worshipping their god in different ways, interpreting doctrine differently, and getting mad at each other over it.

The god then has a choice to make: cut off one of the sects, losing followers and power and leaving that sect to potentially be picked up by an enemy god who will empower them (possibly masquerading as them) but not causing disunity in the church or potentially altering their own nature; or empower both, maintaining their power (maybe creating a larger pool of potential worshippers with new avenues to the faith), but decentralising their power on Faerûn as the faith fragments, and potentially changing themselves as mortal faith ‘evolves’ them.

Sometimes gods treat heresies – even if they’re born of a masquerading enemy - as tests of faith for the misled mortal, or think they can get something out of it.

To be honest, I haven't been able to find much at all about where clerics fit in with the clergy.

They’re the authority, as handed to them from on high. The hands and eyes of the god upon the mortal realm in a way that a lesser priest is not. A cleric/druid is intimately and inextricably tied to their god; They have the god’s ear and speak and act for them, and the rest of the faith follow. A priest who isn’t a divine caster serves the temple and god out of faith, but doesn’t wield divine authority. It’s not quite the same thing, but imagine that the non-divine casters are volunteers helping the people running the place, and the divine casters have taken oaths and have to live according to a set of ecclesial laws the rest of the world doesn’t have to. I mean most clergy took rites and responsibilities, but nowhere near the level a divine caster did. Picture the difference between a fighter and the old fashioned LG paladin. Perhaps both may serve Tyr faithfully, but the paladin has a code, powers and mythos that the fighter doesn’t.

You don’t really get into the higher ranks of the clergy without divine casting.

But even beyond what the gods themselves feel about it, I imagine the clergy would want some verification process for anyone who would represent their faith.

They often – maybe always – do have that, assuming the god hasn’t singled you out for service in which case the clergy are getting sent divine omens that say ‘this is my new cleric/druid’ and then they shut up and do as they’re told or face divine punishment (clerics and druids are not to refuse their god’s commands).

If you’re just a standard acolyte looking to take vows and serve the faith, the Ilmatari have an example:

The senior priest takes you for a quiet walk where you discuss your views on life and your desire to join the faith, ending in a meal where you voluntarily allow yourself to be drugged into a trance where the priests will examine your mind for any ulterior motive or anything hidden that makes you unsuited to their life. If all goes well: welcome to the faith, if not tough luck.

There are also vetting processes for climbing the ranks, which both mortal tradition and the god is involved in: 'Clerics in the service of a god will advance only if they please the god, by remaining faithful to the god's rules and aims, and acting as the god wishes.'

Non-clerics usually fill the bottom ranks, maybe never prograssing past acolyte or having their own vows idk (non-divine caster priests are generally overlooked and recommended as npcs only). Ascending ranks usually means divine caster, and involves a greater level of study, rites to pass, and getting further and further involved with your god (meaning more loyalty required and harsher sentences for betrayal and failure). Spell levels 1-2 come from training, like wizards. 3-5 are being granted by divine servants and messengers of the deity (solars, elementals, fiends, etc). 6+ are coming straight from the god.

Priesthoods tend to be extremely secretive about their inner workings, a good example found in how they treat their holy books*: those are often warded to high hell to make sure the wrong people (alignment, religion, intentions...) can’t get near them, and will insist on putting outsiders that want to see them through an obstacle course of tests and tasks and then still want to stand to the side and watch the visitor like a hawk while they read, ready to act if they do anything sketchy or blasphemous.

*Not like standard parables or the occasional history, like the really important sacred stuff straight from the deity, full of divine spells handed to their most holy. Holy relics and etc.

[utilitycaster]

speaking of jasmine bhullar, she and brennan had a great convo about min-maxers and i was wondering what your own thoughts on min-maxing were? i'm new-ish to actually playing dnd and i still worry about making myself a problem to the dm as opposed to an asset.

First off as someone who enjoys Adventuring Academy but never has the time to watch the full episodes, thank you for bringing this up - I watched just the debate, and it was incredible and hilarious.

This is a good question. I am 100% in agreement with Jasmine here and she said it better than I could: min-maxing simply means that you read the rules to D&D and decided to use them to your advantage. Reading the rules to D&D is great and everyone should do it (in fact, this a reliable way to be an asset to the DM: know how your character's abilities work). There are a few cases where it sucks but most of those aren't actually due to min-maxing so much as shitty player behaviors that can occur in min-maxers.

I think one reason people dislike min-maxers is that the stereotypical min-maxer builds a character who truly can't do anything except for massive damage, and that does kind of suck, but I also think that that is really hard to build in 5e. You're going to have some other abilities. I think it was much easier to truly min-max in 3.5e, and perhaps in older editions you could really break things (in fact, having listened to some pathfinder 1e actual plays, I know you could).

There is also, as Jasmine points out, a false assumption that min-maxers aren't interested in RP or won't do it. This is very clearly untrue and a few examples off the top of my head from Actual Play that are debatably min-maxed are: Deadeye Cybin (played by Brennan, natch) in NADDPod (damage dealer); Laerryn Coramar-Seelie of EXU Calamity (optimized for survival, especially against non-magical foes); Caduceus Clay and Deanna Leimert of Critical Role (both optimized to be healers, incidentally); Orym and Vex, also of Critical Role (optimized to have a stupidly high perception score), Theo Gumbar of A Crown of Candy (optimized to tank and have a stupidly high AC). These are all fantastic characters with profound RP scenes who happen to also be really, really good at a narrow band of things, but they're also not just good at that. Many of them also can serve as the brains or the face of their party; many have utility spells far beyond their area of specialization.

Another reason people dislike min-maxers is they have a reputation for being ungenerous - for swooping in and stealing the spotlight. The above characters, played by some of the most generous people in actual play, show that's clearly not the case. Also, to be honest, a spotlight hog doesn't have to be min-maxed. It's just a shitty "hey, hey look at me" player. I think attention hogs might be a bit more inclined to try to build a character who is really really good at something (again, usually damage more than say, healing) but that doesn't mean that everyone who builds a gunslinger is here to steal all the glory.

Specialization also isn't bad! The reason D&D is a game where people are in a party is because not everyone can do everything! There are a small handful of characters who are a utility knife who can basically do a little bit of almost everything (Keyleth, Fjord, Moonshine) but they are the exception rather than the rule. Barbarians, for example, are a class that usually is structured around tanking and doing damage. This is fine! You probably don't want a party that's all barbarians because it is useful to have healers and ranged attackers and people who can sink all their high stat rolls into the mental side of things because they don't live and die quite so much by their physical stats, but it sure is nice to have a barbarian in the mix to balance out the glass cannon wizard, isn't it?

If you show up to a table where there is a clear gap in party composition (eg: healing) or there's a clear story the GM wants to tell (eg: very social, requires a lot of diplomacy) and you decide not to fill it because you are too busy building Guy With Stealth Bonus of +20, then that's a problem, but that's ultimately a failure to collaborate. Min-maxing for something that doesn't really help the party is simply the way in which you happened to fail that compromise.

I'm sure there are edge-case, dark corners of D&D Reddit builds that do suck, but honestly most of them suck in that they are actually not good (eg: coffeelock). Your typical case of dumping one stat to max out on another? totally normal, totally cool.

Anyway to get to the part of your question regarding not being a problem: you probably aren't! You're thinking about how to not be a problem to your DM, which people who are problems tend not to do. However, the big takeaways of the above are 1. read the rules of your character and 2. build a character who fits into the world. In the session zero, build a character who has a reason to be doing the things the DM outlines in broad strokes, and who complements the other PCs. If you do that, then it doesn't matter if you min-max or not.

[maluspumilaa]

word ramble about the southerngothic farcille au bc im too tired to draw rn + i want to get better at talking about my fandom stuff on here !! below the cut since im still a bit shackled by cringe

so i had an entire whiteboard but its gone now because i am Not paying for premium but thats okay

this is pretty unstructured but i really like chewing on this au brainstyle

i think that imogen and laudna met on the island after separately being adventurers for a little bit (personally i think laudna wouldnt have had the best luck getting jobs, with the whole scary/off-putting thing about her, but still would be scraping by) – no magic academy, sorry farcille lovers

in terms of the bells hells: im honestly not sure !! i think that it would be cool to have them just be an adventuring party and all have ventured down to save laudna but i dont know how that would work, since it gets dangerous to adventure with a party larger than six or so... maybe someone joins after laudna dies, senshi style? i dont know how much meshi will be in the dungeon meshi au tbh

a lot of this au is me building around the fact i went "what if lesbians from one fandom were the lesbians from the other one" tbh

the treant that laudna is chimaeraed up with is definitely meant to do the same job as the red dragon from dunmeshi . im thinking about a crazy large treant btw. like a hulking monstrous mass of gnarled branches that shambles with alarming speed. bark so thick it seems like fire doesnt do anything except anger it. all that

also !! @/sharkodactyl 's comments on my first art post about this au made me insane (/pos), i def think that the imagery of replacing some of laudnas bones with parts of the treant is awesome... something something it ground up some of her bones to use like bone meal for itself and its not like they can just fix that damage

so they use parts from the treant in the ritual hoping that the absorbed bone will be okay to use . and it turns out fine (no it doesnt) !

ABOUT THE RESURRECTION: i think mashing the dnd and dungeon meshi resurrection scenes would be beautiful to me. i deeply enjoy laudnas resurrection in c3, maybe with the ancient magic ritual there has to be some calling of the spirit to beckon it forth or something?? i just want imogen to talk to laudna before the ritual . feels like it raises the stakes or something

also!! if you look at my au art youll see that laudna still has her ear cuff things. that is because i gave her different trauma for this au ♡

until there was some event like what happened in falins backstory, but after laudna was an adult, leading to worse, more direct treatment from her village/city – i was thinking that due to the general anti-elf/anti-magic attitude in her village, individuals deemed especially "dangerous" or suspected of practicing dark magic would have their ears cut to resemble elves (similar to the canaries but. worse i think)

from what ive gathered, a lot of tallman communities in dungeon meshi (specifically what ive seen of laios and falins northern village) are to some degree intolerant of magic, not super open minded, and to me laudna hails from a village or city around there (or somewhere similar to there) and ended up leaving because, like falin, she had an affinity towards seeing ghosts and performing magic and suffered for it

generally, she was a little bit of an outcast even as a child because she was just kind of scary? she had that weird girl swag but nothing that made her stick out all that much

SO BASICALLY thats why she has those ear covers. she doesnt like looking at the scars . maybe they also tried to hang her ? i dont know

also alsoo imogen in this au does have her lightning markies. frequently i forget those. i think theyre more subtle generally (to the point of looking like really pronounced veins) and restricted to mostly her wrists/hand area but they do glow when she uses magic (not a lot ! maybe a lot during the resurrection scene but thats for my enjoyment more than anything)

her lighning markies + hair color is still from her being ruidus-born. it has some sway over ley lines/mana in some way but the attitude in this au is very much the same as in exandria in cr (represents negative things to people, not seen as a good omen, and generally isnt focused on). it still flares and such, but the flares affect stuff with magic – something something it makes magic more volatile/is linked in some way to ancient magic

i think imogen (+ her mother) would have been fairly ostracized by the small village she grew up in (but not as severely as laudna) due to their unique appearances as a result of being ruidus-born. liliana still leaves relvin and a young imogen but not before introducing lifespan angst into her daughters mind

i think. ruidus flares fuck with peoples lifespan. generally elongates them by a good bit? since it has that connection with ancient magic which is from a time of longer lifespans and such

anyways. imogen ventured out from home to find out where her mother went + learn more about her ruidus-born status and such. she came to melini (or. the exandrian equivalent to it?) for research reasons, maybe to make money before setting off on her travels once again or something

and then met laudna and was charmed a normal amount by her on first meeting and decided to stay dungeon diving with her (and bells hells? for a little while after)

also dont ask about pate i dont know either. maybe he is just a little inanimate puppet made out of dead things or maybe hes a regular rat that wears a bird skull sometimes . maybe he has wings . hes a familiar he can do what he wants

if you made it this far, thank you for reading !! i would love interaction about this au :3 sorry if any of this got really long or ramble-y i have many thoughts LOL

[strayheartless]

DnD AGSZC. You know you have HCs. Sharing is caring.

oh well, twist my arm why don'tcha!

So to start, Sephiroth is one of THOSE players. You know the ones: makes broken characters that seemingly can do anything by level five; consistently has a rather depressing backstory that drives their character to be a dick to everyone for the sake of "roleplay". one of THOSE PLAYERS (see also: the Chocobro... or as Salty has pointed out to me, the Genebro.)

Likes to dable with his Characters. Though his favorite remains his Dragonborn Oathbraker Paladin, named Azriel who turned on the party in one paticular campaign to join forces with a powerful female Dragonborn Litch... I don't thing I really need to tell you why.

Angeals a pain because he wants to play "correctly". he's not competative but heis a rulebook warrior. Cloud has banned the Player's handbook from the table for this very reason. Angeal complains about "house rules" and the "rule of fun" all the time, even while activly enjoing the game. He's a pain.

He usually plays a Paladine and his drive for adventure is always "to avenge/ make his father proud. he once pushed the boat out at Clouds behest and broke his oath, and it didn't go... Well. to put it lightly everyone at the table cried (esspecially Zack) and Angeal had to make a new character.

Genesis is predictable to the point of hilarity. always a Bard or a Warlock. Always a Tiefling. Always gender ambiguous. if the games not starting withthe party finding Gen drunk and bemoning exsistence in a tavern then are they really playing DnD? He will always be playing a College of Tragedy bard (Thank you Matthew Mercer.) He's never pushed the boat out once in all the time they've played and if he can squeeze a loveless Quote in where he can he's gunna do it.

Genesis is however the table flirt and the Horny player. he's rolling to seduce the dragon. Cloud has Vowed never to let them play Curse of Strahd... EVER.

Zack is never predictable in his Character build. In the beginning he went similar to Angeal except a human young fighter with dreams of being a hero, But now he likes to dabble with his classes sometimes and mess around in terms of race. Cloud likes Zacks approach to DnD cause it keeps him on his toes.

His Favorite build thus far is his Halfling Rough/Monk multiclass he based off of a little girl he met in Wutai (you know who.).

When Kunsels Available to play he plays as a College of Lore Bard. He knows everything and Cloud is pretty sure He's been spying on his notes between games.

They are all suprisingly big on Roleplay which is fine by cloud cause it makes his job more fun. He's made them cry multiple times with his storylines, and His NPC voices are unparalelled. concidering he's not expressive in his day to day, he comes alive as DM.

There has been some massive in jokes that make other people question if they are sane or not. things like all the boys mimicing Clouds voice yelling "DON'T FUCK THE DRAGON!" everytime they gointo monster dens. Or looking Angeal up and Down and saying "I don't have the hit points to clinb you like a tree," .

Genesis begs Cloud to make a LOVELESS based Campaign... Cloud doesn't want to admit he already has one, hes just afraid Gen will pick holes in it.

Zack is a bastard for casting Fireball when he doesn't have the hit points to survive his own spell. the one time he played a wizard he cast it, did 39 points of damage and only JUST survived by one singular hit point.

Kunsel has the magic touch where dice are concerned. He constantly rolls consistently high rolls.

Cloud is absoloutly sure Sephiroth uses loaded dice. but he can't prove it.

Angeal always seems to end up getting attacked by mimics. doesn'tmatter how many times it happens, he always has too much trust in everyday objects.

[mimsier]

what up, I'm camille, I'm 33, and I never learned how not to include second chance romance in every wip

lately, I've been all about fantasy and I blame that fully on falling in love with dnd last year. I've dabbled plenty in urban fantasy (when branching out from contemporary romance) but dnd especially has given me an appreciation of more subgenres, plus lots of inspiration

current wip: the madness and the blade it's more goofy silly than the title implies because the title came first and shit happens!! I wrote my 50k for nano, and in the weeks since, I've just been in sandbox mode, getting to know the characters and the setting better. when I'm ready to shift back into the main story, I'll do an intro to wip series

briefly, I'll say it's fantasy adventure romance about a thief Retrieval Specialist roped into a scheme to recover a magical artifact, and the ragtag group of weirdos assembled to assist, including not one, not two, but THREE former flames plus an estranged spouse (fake relationship/real married)

writing is my hobby, not my job! it's fun and I've deliberately carved out space for it in my life, but I'm not chasing a finish line with anything I'm working on. it's all just vibes, baby ✌🏽

I follow from @figueroths (multifandom gifmaker), where you can find a masterpost linking to other blogs/socials if you're curious!

thanks for reading!! I'm looking forward to being more active here and getting to know more of you 🫶🏽

[harrarthellix]

Why I love Bg3's translation and its horny scenes

Haarlep's Scene.

First of all, the opening quote

"A thief in the night, greedy and here to take"

The first part is the exact translation (but with a diminutive, so it's more of "little thief" instead) but the second has nothing to do with the meaning. "Greedy and here to take" would be more of " Avaricioso y aquí para llevarse ", which is quite a more open sentence. The actual match in English would be more like:

"A little thief in the night, their ambition has reproach/rebuke/blame"

Huh, quite different, but not in a bad way, I actually love finding things like these. This sentence implies punishment ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

------

"hmm... Raphael, all but spent himself to get that hammer. And you want to take it off him?"

Not really a dirty thing but the phrase "Se dejó la piel" means literally "Left his skin" which in my opinion is way more visceral than "Spent himself". Idk this is just taste because it's a set phrase, not literal. They could have gone with " lo dio todo" which is another set phrase for the same, but they picked the cooler option

------

"This is very naughty. Whatever are we to do?"

Okay, this one makes me laugh so hard. "Cochinada de las gordas" is a very non-elegant way to talk about stuff in general. Yes, it means the same but in a more colloquial tone. Has nothing bad, just shocked about the tone.

Also, the part about "de las gordas" implies a very big naughty thing.

------

" I'm Haarlep, Raphael's personal Incubus, glamoured and transfigured to look like him"

"This one is tricky. "Glamoured" itself does not exist in Spanish. You can use "Glamuroso", but it's an adjective, not a verb. The word "Encantado" is more similar to "Charmed". In dnd's translation "Encantar" is the translation used for "Charm".

This might mean the use of external magic to alter Haarlep's appearance. "Encantamiento" can be translated as "Spell". This word has more meanings depending on context but let's go to the next one.

------

cw: rape and abuse

"His violating stare sees more than all of you, sees: potential"

Okay, this one is hardcore shit. I'm not sure about the implications of the word "violating" in English but it's translated as "violadora" (adjective), wich literally means Rape as in sexual abuse.

I actually like a lot this translation because it could have been softened with "mirada intensa" (intense stare) but the point of this phrase is very much that Haarlep is already thinking about how it's going to use your body after this encounter. It's not trying to go around about what is happening and it's very on-brand with other bg3 moments. 10/10, would not change anything about this implication.

------

"Sometimes, when he is feeling more adventurous, Raphael asks me to change into the Archduchess Raphael"

Here is something weird. They translated "Adventurous" with "Audaz", which are different words, having a literal translation "Aventurado". "Audaz" is more like "Bold" or "Fearless" or even "Cunning".

But sounds nice I love the word "Audaz"

------

"Some last thought whispers in your skull, vacated by everything else but rapture"

Here we have two interesting things. First of all, the word "Whisper" is exchanged with "resuena". "Resuena" is a word used for a noise that repeats itself inside your head, but in poetry is used also for feelings that you can't get rid of. Super cute translation imo.

Second, the word "rapture" is replaced by "extasis". Hear me: In Spanish, you can use the same word when you are about to cum and to express that the power of god is inside you. And that is fucking magic. Yes, Rapture has another religious connotation but trust me when I say it's not the same thing. Rapture is more about leaving one's body in spirit, not about cum.

------

"Devote yourself to pleasure. Stay with me. This can be forever.

Another one with Religion stuff mixed in. "Consagrar y Devoto" are two distinc words in spanish. Devoto is about you being a believer, or giving yourself to a cause, but "Consagrar" its ritual. When something is "Consagrado" it means a priest has blessed it. it's the word used in catholicism to refer to the Transubstantiation (idk if it's written like this in eng). This implies here that sex is a ritual, in this case, to let Haarlep take your body.

Look, I love this shit, some religious kink swept in there

------

"You have laboured enough, pet"

Small thing, but instead of "Pet", Haarlep calls you "puppy" or "Doggy" In Spanish.

-----

AAANNNDDDD That's all I'm willing to do now. Enjoy this and remember to misuse this information.

[galesdevoteewife]

20 TAV/OC QUESTIONS

Please consider yourself tagged if you are interested in building these details for your tav/oc! Feel free to @ me as I would love to read them ///

Thanks so much for the tag from @anderwelt I am so glad you asked about my spider baby (ﾉω･､)

[ Slightly suggestive dark/sexual content warning, and her romanced companion is Gale ]

Zilvera, my spider baby, a Lolth-sworn Drow runaway, swords bard with rogue subclass, most loyal and devoted lover

I. what do they smell like at their freshest? (and/or after a tenday. your choice)

My Zilvera has very low HP and her life depends on stealthiness, so she has been extra careful to keep her scent subdued. She tries to stay as dry as possible and maybe applying some mixture paste of local plants.

II. what would their blood taste like to vampires?

Pure, cold, sharp, iced vodka. Comes with a soothing string that numbs emotions/pain/disgust/fear like tranquilizer.

III. how would they kiss their LI?

As a drow woman she has a mindset that she is expected to take the lead. She likes to gently kiss their eyebrows, forehead, cheeks, neck, carefully worshipping. If for lips, she prefers a soft, dry caress.

Unless she wants to build up tension, then there would be very long and persistent kisses involving tongues and teeth. She would aim to make her partner feels she is desperately craving them. She maintains a deliberate contrast between occasions, it’s her tease and give strategy.

IV. how do they sleep with their LI (what position, does one steal the blankets, is one too hot/cold, etc)?

Zilvera is the embodiment of paranoia. She trances in a sit-up, poised for action, with daggers and loaded light crossbows at her fingertips. She wouldn't allow anything to happen to her LI.

But she has a submissive kink. If she is too worn out she would seek shelter and comfort. Clinging to their arms, resting in the crook of their shoulder, cocoon herself tightly in a blanket—whatever the situation and her partner allows.

V. what does their tent area look like? where do they prefer to pitch their tent (next to water, covered on three sides, etc)?

Darkest spots away from everyone. Drow design, sun-blocking tent, and total darkness inside, faintly illuminated by Underdark mushrooms. She has her tiny mushroom garden in her tent.

VI. if they had a set of dnd dice, what would they look like?

With black silk string inside

VII. do they collect anything (gems, bottles, keys, etc)?

She collects intel—notes, journals, letters, poking into minds for secrets. She also gathers alchemy materials. After entering her relationship with Gale, she starts collecting music scores and cooking recipes.

VIII. if either, are they part of the astarion/gale book club (magic & literature) or the wyll/shadowheart book club (trashy romance novels)?

She likes educational books, especially those with pictures. Zilvera's education primarily focused on practical combat/ survival/ manipulation techniques and Lolth propaganda. She's an avid learner and she feels both excited and unsettled in this alien aboveground world, but she buries those feelings deeply and never shows them. She is trying to learn as much as she can, so she is actually grateful for Gale's oversharing.

IX. if they had to be put in a “get along shirt” with a companion, who would it be?

Ohh it'd be Minthara. Although they would team up and life-threaten whoever dared to force them into that shirt.

Zilvera's ego wouldn't allow her to give away even the slightest hint that SHE ENVIES HER. The daughter of the first house, a member of the royal family. Menzoberranzan is far behind, but she hates, HATES that the part of the urchin, the nobody in her still bends to authority. Minthara is everything a drow woman should be. She feels very uncomfortable whenever Minthara is teasing—or talking to, or looking at—Gale.

Note: I cheated so my playthrough had a full house companion with both Minthara and Halsin xD

X. do they prefer speak with dead or speak with animals?

She uses both all the time. But if she must choose, it would be speak with the dead, usually the information is more useful.

XI. what are their thoughts on clowns?

She doesn't get it at all xD Zilvera has a very dark sense of humor, mostly about sarcasm regarding tragedies or morals. Maybe only a killer clown would crack a smile to her face.

XII. their companions are gossiping about them behind their back! who is it and what are they saying?

Astarion would annoy Gale with hints and information as if he slept with Zilvera, although he didn't. In my world, Zilvera and Astarion sneak out together a lot after everyone else rests—for blood hunts, stealing, murdering, scouting—anything that risks disapproval from the good guys. He is just sowing discord for fun. Although they never share beds, he does know a ton about her, just as she knows him.

Jaheira/Karlach/Shadowheart would openly mock her obvious lovesickness.

Halsin is worrying about some of her self-destructive traits, and he tries to bring it up to Gale.

XIII. what makes them laugh? what does their laugh sound like?

Victory over worthy opponents, gaining powers: perks/powerful objects/exp/skills etc, successful tricky plans, and sarcastic stories make her laugh with a soft smirk. Something like Gale's "worth less than an adolescence handkerchief" comment on battlefield prayers would make her chuckle. Or Lae'zel's sudden loyalty to Orpheus right after she shakes off her queen's leash.

XIV. do they have any inside jokes among their companions?

Not really. Astarion would share quite a couple with her, but Zilvera only ever cares about Gale, then Astarion, then nobody. She doesn't care enough to make fun of anyone else.

Note: Just to make her narrative more dramatic, I like everybody xD

XV. what’s the description of their camp clothes in the inventory menu?

It bears the scars of numerous critical tears, yet it has been skillfully mended as if nothing ever happened.

XVI. what’s the description of their underwear in the inventory menu?

Silky, breathable Drow design with an abundance of strings. It leaves one wondering how to solve the ties to put it on—or take it off.

XVII. how do they celebrate their birthday?

She would laugh at the idea of celebrating such a day. In her mind, being born is the worst thing that could ever happen to a person.

Note: Lolth-sworn drows have a concept that they are born as Mother Lolth's meat, in life and in death.

XVIII. what modern day tv show would they binge over a weekend? do they get their LI to watch with them?

She would prefer artsy, poetic movies (mostly sad). She would cry to them, go to bed, and wake up with all the sentiments buried 9 layers deep in her heart. And no, she would never ever ask any soul to watch them with her; it's a moment that's most private to her.

Something like the movie "100 Yen love". Great movie by the way!

XIX. do you have a playlist for your tav? if so, what’s the title + description?

I don't. But I think Monsters (feat. Xeah) by Tommee Profitt is matching what I am picturing for her background.

Run away 'til I hear no sound/ Run away 'cause I have no choice/ Are we the hunters?/ Are we the hunted?/ Who can you trust? /Are you one of us?

XX. if you were to try pickpocketing them, what would they be carrying?

Zilvera keeps some jewelries and gems as an emergency fund, sewing them to the inner layer of her armor. These would be very difficult to steal. In her bags, she carries many types of arrows, potions, poisons (she favors Crawler Mucus), alchemy materials, poison/antidote-filled syringes, and pick lock/trap disarm tools.

If you've read all the way to here, both my spider baby and I love you ღ (´･ω･` ღ)