#lmao LMAO

[spirk-trek]

I ALMOST SPIT OUT MY DRINK HE REALLY WENT "aww... anyway bye!"

[deklo]

i’m at a point where i’m considering going to the doctors because i keep getting headaches. that’s crazy. i simply don’t wanna go through all of that again 😭

[zharizard666]

cutest Idol group!

[carinelian]

sometimes i forget that writing is a way to self-reflect because now i'm just noticing that i always, always have a scene of my characters being cramped into tight spaces and i can be so fucking dogshit in anywhere else in the story BUT lock in for that specific scene

like i know constraint drives creativity but my mind took it literally and now aside from that random discovery i am thinking back into my childhood where i coped by using tunnel vision completely tuned out everything else in favor of One Objective

[thislittlekumquat]

Corrin like "instead of interrogating randos, let's find an old man to talk to! Much better :)"

Even in Birthright she thirsty....

@dirtyoldmanhole

[nirikeehan]

Happy friday! "sharing food" from the fluffuary propmts

Thanks, Blue!

Came up with some post-Barovian nonsense for shady besties tonight for @dadrunkwriting

WC: 792

---

She puts the pie down in front of him, steam wafting up from the flaky crust. Metrion’s eyes go wide, as if he’s never seen a shepherd’s pie before. They’re brown in the dim light of Herald’s Rest, but she’s grown used to his many disguises. And his true appearance, his exotic background. She had assured him he wouldn’t need to hide himself at Skyhold, but he’s done it anyway, taking on the part of the unassuming, tan-skinned human. It will take some time, she thinks. 

Thalia hands him a fork and sits on the bench across from him. She stabs her side of the pie with her own. “So. First impressions?” 

“That this is bloody better than wolf jerky.” His voice is muffled by a full mouth, his head bowed over the dish, hair hanging down in his face. He eats like a prisoner might, she has noticed: hunched and frantic, afraid each meal may be his last. Her heart tugs with a little pang of pain.

“I meant Skyhold.” She eats a forkful of gravy, meat and peas, wonderfully seasoned. The cooks know what they’re doing. It’s so good to be home. 

Metrion shrugs. “’S big. Busy. Full of people.” He glances at her quickly. “They all defer to you.” 

Thalia nods. “I am the Inquisitor.” 

“Yeah, but you never really explained what that means. I think I get it now.” He looks away, to the casks of ale Cabot rolls out from a back room. He taps his empty stein on the table between them. “Be a love and get me another pint, will ya?”

Thalia laughs, but she does as he says. This catches the eye of many in the tavern, but she ignores them. When she returns with the frothing mug, he takes it from her and slings it back. He wipes his mouth, though through the illusion, no foam stands out on his lip. “Is it gonna be a problem?” 

“Is what going to be a problem?” Thalia breaks off a bit of pie crust and chews on it. She has a feeling she knows what he’s getting at, but she intends to make him say it. 

“Me being here. Think there’s at least a dozen blokes ready to defend your honor because I dared make the Inquisitor serve me ale.” He switches mid-sentence to the accent he uses to impersonate nobility. 

Thalia takes a breath. “You’re here because I invited you. You’re under my protection. If anything, you deserve a medal of valor for helping me escape Barovia alive.” 

Metrion chortles into the ale stein. “Sure. Right. Like anyone’ll pin a medal on my chest.” 

“I can,” Thalia retorts. “I will, if you want. In the main hall, in front of everyone.”

“While sitting on your throne, your highness?” 

“It’s technically your worship,” Thalia reminds him. Metrion scoffs, burying his face in one hand. 

She chews her lip. “You don’t have to stay, you know.” The words are painful in her throat, even worse rolling off her tongue. “I just thought, after everything we’ve been through, I didn’t want to you to have to…” Return to old habits, she wants to say, but that feels too judgmental. She’s adamant about not judging him, not the way her team did. Not when he understands her in strange, unexpected ways no one else has, and would have died for her several times over. 

She’s worried, though, that this was perhaps too idealistic of her. That removing Metrion from the environment that exacerbated his worst impulses isn’t enough to break the cycle of shame she’s observed in him. Some behaviors he’s slid right back into. One she’s aided herself, by giving him the ale he requested. 

 His hands don’t shake anymore, at least.

“No, no, no, no.” Metrion waves at her dismissively. “Don’t get me wrong, this is loads better than the streets of Waterdeep or Neverwinter. Just. Takes some gettin’ used to, all right?” 

He digs into the pie again, eating very deliberately while maintaining eye contact, as if to appease her. He has an intense gaze when he wants to, a way of making it seem like she is the only person in the room who matters to him. She knows this is a trick of his, a way to butter up a target, but he does it enough unbidden she suspects it’s also simply the way he is with people he likes. 

They eat in silence for a while.

“This meat really is superb,” Metrion comments, licking his fork clean. He glances at her, a smug smile tugging at his lips. He looks away, feigning wistfulness. “Not as good as Ismark’s, but. You know.” 

Thalia groans with laughter and throws her napkin in his face. 

[deepcuts]

Still never will be over the fact my mom, and multiple other, older, people told me when I was a literal child that I had ‘evil eyes’ (literally autism stare) plus the fact I have brown eyes that get mocked just as often made me so insecure about my eye’s and eye color, also probably what lead me to dying my hair to black so it wouldn’t match my eyes anymore. I’ve embraced the evil of my eyes, the evil of my soul.

[damage-incorp0rated]

happy early birthday to me from me

[virtue-and-beneviolence]

bitch (affectionate)

Bitch

[bauliya]

AGAIN

kendrick lamar wrecked drake’s shit so hard he’s trending number two on the white fujoshi website 😭😭

[casualfoxwitch]

since facebook nixed fact checking some really cool things are being shared and I am totally here for it

[slightly-gay-pogohammer]

pokèmonize yourself!!!!

spin this wheel to see your pokemon type

spin this one to see how you'll look like

[gophersdomain]

something something despite the all horrors and tragedies of the world, love was there and that's all that matters

[lrndvs]

compliments from girls go hard

[eliotquillon]

if house md were running in 2024 there would be an episode with a patient who identifies as an ‘online content creator’ (cagily) where house agrees to take the case primarily because when he offhandedly refers to her as an onlyfans model both cameron and cuddy get really offended and say it’s a sexist assumption so he doubles down and becomes committed to finding the patient’s onlyfans and proving it. at some point it would be revealed that chase actually is an onlyfans model and started doing it as a stopgap after his dad died and he suddenly got disinherited but he makes so much money off it that now medicine is basically just a hobby. cameron and foreman both disagree with the concept online sex work but it turns out they disagree for different reasons (cameron thinks it’s exploitative and not-feminist, foreman finds it distasteful and thinks people should get ‘real jobs’) and spend most of their scenes together arguing about this while chase gets continually more shifty. they break into the patient’s house and there’s a full ringlight and camera setup which seems to confirm house’s suspicions. while trying to find the patient’s onlyfans house accidentally finds chase’s onlyfans instead and considers publicly embarrassing him about it like he did with wilson’s sex tape but soon realises that most of the staff at the hospital are already subscribed to chase’s onlyfans so makes fun of him for that instead. it then transpires that the reason why the patient is so cagey about being a content creator is that she’s an ASMR artist and all the soap she’s been shaving on camera has irritated her lungs. cuddy is about to make house give her 20 extra hours of clinic duty as recompense but at last minute it’s revealed that the website the patient uses for some of her bonus commissions is, drumroll…onlyfans, because she’s been banned from patreon. how does house know this? wilson is subscribed to her because the soap videos sometimes soothe him to sleep. something by cigarettes after sex plays. roll end credits.