#living vicariously through your children

[sarahshoots1st]

Dalinar's relationship with Adolin is a textbook example of a parent attempting to live vicariously through their child, making up for the all the lost opportunities they never took or were given. I feel like most people can't relate to having a war criminal as a parental figure, but they can relate to having a parent push you to become the person they, in retrospect, wish they had been themselves.

Adolin naturally feels trapped within the boundaries Dalinar sets on him, and rightfully tries to break free of them. So much of his flippant playboy attitude is a pushback against the rigid ideals to which his father holds him - it's not just cuz he's a bisexual pretty boi. Dalinar insists on always presenting himself (and by extension, Adolin) as the ideal military officer, perfectly in control of themselves - since Dalinar was so often not in control of himself as a youth. Varying his outfit, even within the confines of the military uniform, is a way for Adolin to express himself, find freedom from the constraining expectations his father puts on him. The same goes for the drinking, dueling, and being friendly with his troops.

It's a case of "what's right for one person isn't always right for another person." Dalinar is right to hold himself to these codes - he needs them. But what he's not right for doing is holding other people to these codes uncompromisingly. Certainly the other Highprinces needed the wakeup call the Codes provided, but Adolin is proof that it's possible to be a good person without rigidly holding yourself to the Codes.

And there are times where he's better off for having learned them. In book 1, we get the scene where Adolin comes to understand the importance of an officer dressing properly, to show that they are taking the war and the danger seriously - something many of the other lighteyed officers had forgotten. Adolin doesn't dismiss the Codes outright - he simply adapts them to his own personal needs.

In the end, your ideals should lead to increased self-actualization, not decreased. Ethics should set you free to be the best person you can be. That's one of the thing Stormlight does well - by having different orders of Knights Radiant, it shows how what's important to one person's personal growth isn't necessarily the right fit for everyone. Because Dalinar is so traumatized by the consequences of his previous life, however, he has trouble seeing this with his own son. This is further complicated by the fact that Adolin is one of his last connections to Evi - the woman who he murdered in his rage.

Anyway, this rant is in no way inspired by my own parents' expectations of me. Why do you ask?

[frogroll]

days of color & my gay little skykid

[ofdinosanddais1]

I want kids in life but only when I'm financially well off where I can show them so much love and make sure they don't have to worry about stress and how I can give them the best birthday parties. I really want a fun life where I can host extravagant birthdays for my kids. And by extravagant, I mean fun for THEM. If they just want a little pirate adventure with just family and a couple friends, then I will go all in on making a fun pirate adventure. If they want to pretend to go slay a dragon for their birthday, then hell yeah I'll put so much effort into making a giant dragon-slaying story where they feel like the main character.

I felt like I had to abandon the play that I loved to do as a kid because it was "weird" or "cringe" and I don't want my kids to feel like that. I want their creativity and love for adventure to be embraced. I want nothing more than for them to grow a healthy bond with confidence and creativity and for them to have fun.

Like, any bio kid that I have is very likely to be autistic so if they want a small gathering or not evena party but they want to have an infodump party where they make a big project and use their birthday party to show it off and talk all day about it then I would be crying tears of joy that my kid felt safe enough to do that.

If my kid wants no party at all and just wants to sit up in their room playing video games then that's also fun. I'll make sure to make them their favorite snacks and some cake for them without the expectation that we have to force them to sit around a cake while we sing happy birthday. If they don't want to do that, then we're not gonna do that because at the end of the day, it's THEIR birthday and they deserve a special day even if that special day seems boring to someone else.

For their first birthday, I can do a fun cutesy party that I would want within the limits of not overstimulating a baby but I'll throw the party that I think would suit them with only close family friends and relatives because they're gonna not remember it but after that, their birthday is their birthday.

As for me, one thing I would wanna do if I had the funds to do it would be to have the quinceañera that my family couldn't afford. I want to clarify I would NOT be forcing mt child to do a quince if they didn't want one. This would just be me having a quince with friends and families because I wanna feel like my mexican princess self (and yes, I am Mexican so don't jump on you're cultural appropriation high horse). But if my kid wanted a quince, i would NOT use it to live vicariously through them. That's what my adulthood one would be should I ever become rich enough to have one.

[the-joy-of-knowledge]

25 Laws of power for women

Conceal your goals especially the ones that are appealing. Losing weight, reinventing yourself, marrying wealthy. Instead talk about your altruistic goals - to help children, invest in education, this will chase insecure people with vile intentions.

Do not give anyone your source of power: Was is a book that changed your life? a mentor? a movie? Never give up your secret to success. If forced to do say allude to God, the universe, the a random phenomenon

Use the patriarchy to your favor; we live in a world that is, only associate with men who have power, use that power for good.

Never appear too perfect but be selectively vulnerable when needed. Only share something that you will be comfortable saying. You might say “I forget my keys all the time,” “I don’t know how to perfectly park a car “. But never disclose something you are not comfortable with just because you are afraid of being perfect.

Maintain distance in relationships. Friends are the best and you need them. But if you feel that they are becoming too dependent, see them at your own will. But also the reverse could be the case. Your friend may keep a distance, and that is the way of life. You have got to move on from it.

Develop your own style that makes you unique, beautiful, and elegant. Avoid trying to fit in the crowd of people who claim to care less about their style yet have too many opinions about other women’s style

Avoid male friends at all cost, you will have male colleagues, male bosses, male acquaintances, business partners. Keep it that way. You do not want a Truman Capote divulging your secrets to the world. Do not keep a man who does not fit your standard.

You do not have to win at every game. Pick and choose what is best for you and leave room for others. And step down if you have attained that level of success, do not let the society do it for you.

Trust people but remember that we are all humans. So trust with discretion!

Confuse people with kindness; people are not always comfortable with beautiful and intelligent women. That power is too intimidating so confuse them by being genuinely generous, curious, kind, and passionate.

Keep your strong opinions to yourself.. if you support a movement, a way of life, do so silently.

We all have dirty laundry, wash them privately, don’t expose yourself. Remain silent when people try to attack you or shame you. Whatever is not confirmed is not true. You are the only one who knows all the truth about you.

Don’t attract pity or praise: People who pity you do not help you, in fact they might think that you are weak and could mock you at their annual gossipping meeting. And if you are doing things for the sake of praise you are wasting your time.

Choose yourself all the time; never put any one’s feelings above yours.

Trust your own intuition if you feel someone is being malicious towards you, giving you back handed compliments then you should let them go

Never speak bad of another woman. Do not lazy around gossipping. Keep your hands clean and your conscience clear.

Avoid women with low self esteem they will bring you down. For some reason they do not like seeing other women who are doing better than them

Be careful who you seek validation from. Not everyone needs to be pleased. If they are in no way capable of contributing to your life in the ways you prefer, then don’t ask them for their opinions or please them.

Do not compete with other women, if you do you are only putting them on a pedestal. You are making the the standard by which you measure your progress. If you do compete, begin digging your grave.

Do not give unsolicited advice, do not share the inner workings of your mind, If your mouth is very charitable you better start journaling.

Be well-rounded and interesting. It attracts people. It also keeps you busy because you are continually improving and learning. An idle mind is an easily subdued one.

Avoid women who want to live vicariously through you; they want to know who you know, shop where you shop, befriend who you befriend, wear what you wear.

Pay attention to the source of your discomfort; get rid of them. You tell them your dreams and they remind you of all your hindrances. They ask why are you dressed so fancy as though fancy isn’t subjective. They undermine you interests and goals. They will also be quick to bring you down because they are afraid of your potential.

Do not fear power or please power. When we see powerful people we try to hard to befriend them, to be close to them but you need to be comfortable without them. Don’t push yourself in the name of friendship, do not try too hard to be in their inner circle. Your independence of mind is the most important. Instead become a powerful woman, aloof to the presence of power but aware of its importance. Be an ingenious and intelligent and use your creativity to uplift yourself. When you do so it will be hard to ignore you. Even the powerful will become an ally.

Enjoy moments of solitude. Use that time to develop yourself, improve your body, learn new skills, create with your mind, read widely, become more elegant, then launch yourself.

Remember the most powerful women are the most intelligent. Inspired by Robert Greene's 48 Laws of Power. Use at your discretion.

[ghavialis]

They should make hormonal cycles that don't affect my opinions on having children

[flowachild]

parents really need their own lives so they can easily adjust when their kids are grown

[adinafay]

I like to think Bhaal spends the entire timeline of BG3 just so incredibly confused and absolutely pissy about why he can't convince anyone - even his most special, Chosen, purest of Bhaalspawn- to murder for simple murder's sake.

Not that Bhaal doesn't appreciate murder more generally, but also how in the hells is he supposed to achieve global-genocide when everyone, even his own idiot kids, keeps using his precious murder as a mere tool, a means to their own ends, ya know?

He has to be a helicopter-parent to Durge about it:

Pre-tadpole Durge is so in-want of connection that they have to be under constant supervision by their specially-assigned butler to try and keep them on task. ("Stop bitching and let me live vicariously through you like all the other sport-parents!")

Then, even that isn't enough to stop them from connecting with Bane's lil shit "Gortash" and eventually starting in with the crown/Absolute plan ("Why in the hells are we using MY MURDER to help fucking Bane with his fucking tyranny?!")

Shortly after that Durge goes and gets merc'd and tadpoled by the other one... ("Have I taught my children nothing!? Orin really should know well by now that it's not 'murder' if they survive...")

... And then - clearly still prone to frivolous connection - they fucking gang up with a bunch of weirdos only to head home with other, new bad habits like "thinking for themselves" and "the apparent intent to entirely trash the plan they insisted on making with Gortash!" ("If you didn't want to play you shouldn't have had me sign you up for the team! Get your ass back in the game! You already got your Deathstalker uniform and everything! Now stop embarrassing me and maybe I'll even give you a slayer form.")

And, while Durge is being a rebellious lil Bhaalspawn, Bhaal also has to contend with:

His cultists, who are apparently killing mostly just for notoriety and/or safety amongst themselves. ("Quit playing around! I assure you I do not give a single fuck which one of you did it or how clean it was so long as the murder(s) did happen.")

Orin, who is playing at being an artist and completely absorbed in her exploration of murder and maiming as novel media to express her innumerable daddy issues ("Yes, I DO still like your lobotomized bloodkin more; at least they never wasted my time asking me to put all their shitty artwork up on the fridge.")

And Bane and Myrkul, who are presumably laughing their godly asses off and/or absolutely raging at Bhaal's inability to keep anyone at heel and how it's interfering with their mutual plan.

TL;DR: Life is hard when you're The God of Murder and neither your employees or your children properly respect the family business and your frenemies mock you for it.

[grandwretch]

nah bc I feel like we give Murray way too much credit and underestimate how much Steve hates being told what to do. if Murray tried to sniff out steddie the way he did jancy, Steve's mean girl would jump out immediately.

"you are giving me relationship advice? I'll tell you what, next time I wanna know how to be a bald, alcoholic fuck who can't keep his noses out of children's love lives, I call you. Until then, maybe you should work on the crippling trust issues that stop you from having your own relationships instead of living vicariously through everyone else's."

and Eddie is in the background cheering him on the whole time

[mrkeatingsblazer]

The Prophecy [Oh, Was It Punishment] Part Two

Apollo x Child of Hermes! Reader

Part One Part Two Part Three

It has been six months and seven days. Six months and seven days since the war against Gaia. Six months and seven days since Rachel has made a prophecy. Six months and seven days since Lord Apollo has been missing. Not even his children have heard a whisper from the God, not even a glimpse in a dream and while Demi-Gods are used to being ignored by their parents, it is never to this extent; it is never with this God.

You’ve found yourself with the three Apollo campers a lot, trying to comfort them during such a peculiar and unknown time. No child should have to worry for their parent. Will Solace especially has taken the blunt of the hardship. Being so young and taking care of both the wounded from the war and his cabin since the Battle of Manhattan has taken a toll on the kid. You find yourself relating to the younger boy immensely. When Luke left and you were finally claimed, Chiron made you the head of the Hermes cabin. Though unlike you, who has been out of camp more often than not and was allowed to appointed the Stolls the title of Co-heads, Will has been burdened with being alone with his responsibilities since he was 13. You watch him now, folding and unfolding bandages repeatedly out of a nervous habit. The frown on his face was subtle but still there. He could have been finished up with inventory an hour ago but chose not to.

“I think we’re done Solace,” you say from atop the infirmary counter, letting your feet swing back and forth.

“You can head to dinner, I’m fine here. Thanks for the help,” his tired voice mumbles in response.

“Kid, you’ve rewrapped that one bandage like 8 times now, I think it's been wrapped enough,” you say quirking your brow.

Will sighs, placing the bandage down before turning to you, “will you stop it with the kid thing, you’re only 2 years older than me.”

“2 and a half,” you point at him with a scalpel that was lying beside you and smirk, “and I’ll have you know I’m a legal adult William.” He looks you up and down and snorts. His expression quickly converts back downtrodden, as if that momentary joy was a mistake. Along with the fact that his father is gone M.I.A, camp has been more depressing than usual. Kids were going missing, and no one understood why; one of these kids being your little brother and Will’s best friend, Cecil. You watch as he shuffles around like a stray kitten, you’d never pity him not when you can relate. Hopping from the counter, you walk over to him and seize his arm, yanking him towards the door. It was a comical sight, with Will being almost 2 heads over you.

“[reader]- Hey!” he gently tries to get out of your grasp but fighting two wars made your grip nothing less than steel. You continue to push the boy towards the door

“Don’t even Solace,” you scold as he tries again to get away from you, “we will be going to dinner and after that we will be going to the campfire whether you like it or not.” you yank open the infirmary door and shove him out, “and hey, maybe a certain son of Hades will be there,” you smirk as the blonde turns bright red. He grumbles, rubbing his arm but compiling and following you to the dining pavilion. It was adorable to see the kid with his crush, especially due to who it was on. You’ve known Nico since he was an annoying but excitable little 10-year-old and Will even longer, neither of them have had a good childhood, most demi-gods never do. In a way, you were living vicariously through them. You did that a lot. With Annabeth who got with Percy, your old crush, Piper and Jason, Hazel and Frank. You couldn’t help but wish you had what they had or in the case of the former, who they had.

You remember your days on the Argo. When there were no battles or group meetings, you were subjected to sit and watch the love emulating around you. For a while you thought the countless couples around you meant something, that because they were all members of the crew and got together, that for sure meant you were to get with the last single member, Leo. He thought so too. After his little thing with Hazel, that even now you don’t try to understand, you felt as though something was forming between the two of you. At one stage you found yourself hanging off him more than you were around Percy and Annabeth. You couldn’t help but be attracted to his mind, his creativity, his light. Your two best friends encouraged the blooming relationship between the two of you, even with Percy not liking Leo a whole lot, and so did the rest of the crew.

Everything changed after he came back from Ogygia. He came to you first after he returned, making you feel special in a sort of pitiful way. Expecting a grand reunion, you were instead greeted by his starry eyes as he spoke about another girl- no not a girl, a Goddess, who had him returned to you utterly smitten. Your heart broke as he told you he was planning to find her again. When you were given the truth by Eros, it made sense in the end. Leo being sent to Calypso was the Fates way of ensuring you remained loveless and killing him was just a way for them to remain cruel.

You sat through dinner at the Hermes table, which was smaller than it ever has been in years. Connor was beside you flinging peas at Clovis who would jolt at the impact before dozing off once more. Nico Di Angelo was sitting at the Apollo table, next to a blushing and, surprisingly, flirting Will Solace. You sighed looking around at all the missing campers, be it they left for college, died during the wars or as of late, were lost to Gods knows where. Even the rising moon seems dimmer than it should have been. You wonder if that was on purpose, was it Lady Artemis’ way of showing her sadness for her twin brother? Was she also in the dark as much as all of us?

By the time the campfire rolled around, you just wanted to retire to your cabin, but chose not to, for the sake of your sibling, Will Solace and yourself. As Austin was doing his cover of ‘My Sweet Lord’ by George Harrison, you heard rustling coming from the forest behind you. At first you passed it off as nothing more than a noisy nymph. It was when you heard a yell did you twist your ring, transforming it into your sword. The object was gifted to you before you even knew of your parentage, by an original member of the Argonauts, Atalanta. You recall the words of the swift footed women, who aided you during your mission to save both Lady Artemis and Annabeth; “never let a man take you unless he can keep up,” she winked before racing off. Many other campers joined you in seizing their weapons, Nico and Clarisse come to either side of you, swords ready. Two figures stumbled out of the forest, neither were recognizable. The taller seemed to be giggling and relying on the smaller to carry their weight. As they came closer you could make them out. A small Asian girl with black coke bottle glasses was cursing the taller brunette boy. He was gangly and average; you deemed him instantly not a threat.

“Hold! Who goes there?” Chiron boomed.

The boy gave a wobbly grin along with a shaky wave and replied, “oh, hi! I’m Apollo!” before collapsing to the ground

[helaintoloki]

hi can you do a ben hargreeves x reader where you comfort him after a mission because you know how he doesn’t like to you use his tentacles and how feels like a monster. Just major fluff I miss ben

a/n: i love writing ben fluff your wish is my command anon <3

warnings: brief mentions of blood, lots of comfort and fluff

Blood cakes itself into the crevices of your finger nails as you diligently scrub the metallic scented stains off of Ben’s favorite sweater. The sound of the running water from the sink fills the somber silence as the boy sits quietly and watches you work. He hasn’t said a word to you in over an hour, but you know better than to push him. This isn’t the first time Ben has sought out your company after a miserable day, and you surely doubt it will be the last.

You’ve lived across the street from the Umbrella Academy your whole life, and ever since you were five the Hargreeves have always been your closest friends. Despite their lives being full of heroism and extraordinary power, they enjoyed the normalcy of your life and relished in being able to live vicariously through you. They loved to hear you recount your day at school or your trip to the local mall; they asked about a million questions regarding your family and what it was like to have a real mom and dad. You were their window into the real world and the person that could keep them grounded even on the toughest days. As a result, whenever one of the children was having a particularly rough day they’d seek solace in the refuge of your bedroom.

And that’s exactly why it didn’t surprise you to come home after school and find Ben waiting awkwardly in the center of your room as he tried his absolutely best to avoid getting blood on your carpet. He didn’t have to say anything for you to know why he was here in the middle of your bedroom, and you didn’t press him for details as you immediately got to work cleaning the mess.

After some time you’re able to get his sweater perfectly spotless and hang it to dry before joining your friend who sits somberly upon your bed. He’s too ashamed to look you in the eye, but he doesn’t push you away when you carefully wrap your arms around his figure and pull him into your chest for comfort. Out of all the Hargreeves siblings, Ben seeks you out the most, so you’ve come to learn that all he usually needs is a soothing hug during times like these. It isn’t long before his shoulders quietly begin to shake in time with his sobs, his fists grabbing handfuls of your shirt to ground himself into the present as you reassuringly rub his back.

“You had to use your powers today,” you prod gently, though your words come out as more of a statement than a question. You already know the answer based on his demeanor, but you feel this is something you must voice aloud anyway.

“I’m a monster,” he cries miserably into your chest prompting your heart to ache painfully in response. You hate that he sees himself in such a way; Ben is perhaps the kindest boy you’ve ever met, and you wish he could view himself through your eyes and realize just how special he is in spite of his abilities.

“You could never be a monster, Ben,” you assure him with a tight squeeze before pulling back to see him eye-to-eye. “Every day you and your siblings fight to keep the world a safe place. You are so selfless and kind and important, and the portal in your chest doesn’t change any of that.”

“Is that really what you think?” He utters meekly, sniffing back his remaining tears as he slowly loosens his death grip on the fabric of your school uniform shirt.

“I would never lie to you, Ben” you reiterate with sincerity in your tone. You offer him a kind smile and use the pads of your thumbs to wipe away his tears before confessing, “I love you too much to do that.”

His breath hitches softly in his throat at your words, and he’s quick to swallow down his nerves before stuttering out a rushed, “I-I love you too.”

Your room grows silent until the only sound that fills the space is your quiet breathing. A look of understanding is shared between you then, and now it is Ben who pulls you into his embrace for the tightest hug imaginable. While he had once feared having you anywhere near the monsters’ den, he now held no trepidation at having you so close to his chest. He loved you, and you loved him in spite of the thing he hated most about himself, and in the safety of your room he could finally feel whole and at peace with his flaws.

Ben will always come to you in search of comfort, and you will always be there to give it to him.

[cyborg-squid]

Slept and reflected on my Canto 7 thoughts some more and stumbled some themes regarding the original Don Quixote and the themes of parent and child they have with Sancho and the Family; this was sparked by DQs panic effect which was something like 'Duty/Responsibility to the Family' (can't find the exact text).

And, while this might not be something I personally agree with, there's this idea and trope that parents, when they have a family, have to give up some of their hobbies or aspirations or the like; we can see that, by the end of DQs story, he has accepted that he has to give up his heroic dreams in order to take care of his Family, believing now that the two can no longer coexist. And knowing, rather accurately, that it was his dream that put his Family in this position to begin with; at the start, his Family didn't really believe in his dreams of human and Bloodfiend coexistence and heroic Fixers, but they were willing to go along with it because they love their Father.

It's a little painful to type this, but the assessment of his dream as being naive is pretty accurate, at least in it's manifestation via La Manchaland, because while he has been able to maintain strong self-discipline in refusing to drink from humans, his Children didn't have that same quality and didn't fully know what they were getting into with being a part of La Manchaland, and the deprivation they would end up being subjected to, all for a cause and dream they didn't truly believe. It's no surprise, then, that they ended up breaking. The Children, even though they're not being forced per se, go along with it in order to make their Father happy, without fully knowing what it would entail.

And by the time of the final boss fight, DQ knows this, sees the suffering his childish dream has wrought upon his family, and is now ready to bear the responsibility of taking care of them, as well as the responsibility for their sins, which (in his eyes) means the final abandonment of his long held dream. Our Don Quixote has most often been depicted as a childish one, but it is La Manchaland's Don Quixote that now has an arc depicting a reaching of maturity, albeit a stunted sort. Like I said earlier, the idea that being a parent, starting a family, means letting go of your past dreams...

...but he really didn't need to. Because DQ's dream of peace, tomorrow, and of Fixers, which he first inherited from Bari, were successfully passed on to Sancho, even if she didn't recognize it at first. It's not something that grew naturally in her, it seems, as she ended up being the more 'realist' one than DQ in the past (in the present Canto these positions are reversed), but they're present nonetheless, and that belief is stronger in her than it is in others of the Family, likely because she was the one with a stronger bond to their Father Don Quixote, as well as becoming closer to Bari, the originator of said dream.

Because with Sancho, the belief in the dream isn't innate or 'natural' to her, we see that the world of the City is not an easy place for dreams of peace and justice to exist in, but she believes in and loves her Father (and dear friend Bari), who believed in that dream, and thus she will continue on that adventure in his stead. Because there is also this idea of parents living vicariously through their children, or children carrying on the legacy of their parents. La Manchaland's Don Quixote, as shackled, by duty and responsibility, to the past as he now is, is unable to move forward as he once could, but Sancho, our Don Quixote, is still able to, thanks in large part to the gifts and dreams he gave her (as well as the aid of the Sinners, in helping her realize that the dream is not yet ended), and will now move forward in his stead.

[randomness-is-my-order]

pjo twitter and fandom (especially the younger side of it) are PISSING ME OFF SO BAD again. all the continuous discourse and speculation regarding the cast and their friendships is so insidiously parasocial as it forces upon these kids – let me emphasise again – these KIDS certain narratives that we have absolutely no business being concerned about. if it’s not shipping walker/leah and projecting your percabeth dynamics onto their REAL LIFE FRIENDSHIP, it’s doing a 180 and posting about how they hate each other and micro-analysing the cast’s online content to stir the pot and create unnecessary drama. are people this bored in life? is it soooo difficult to leave them the fuck alone?? and it’s not just the “hate e/o” crowd that goes overboard, it is also the crowd that INSISTS the castmates must ALL be the absolute best of friends as if this is some pjo fantasy they want to vicariously fulfil through these kids!!! it’s weird and disgusting and puts unnecessary expectations onto the cast. let them breathe and interact with each other, however they see fit. a post (or lack thereof) doesn’t reflect the reality of their friendships. the way people are so emotionally attached to the cast’s irl dynamics and closely monitor every minor interaction between them is disturbing afff and i’m bummed to see so little effort to curb this nonsense (ik atp pjotwt is a resistant echochamber–not that tumblr/reddit aren’t, mind you). also the fact that people are putting these children and their friendships onto pedestals is just. ugh. let them be!! that’s all i ask into this void of the internet. so sick of seeing the obsession with their real lives become normalised within the fandom.

[physalian]

Take A Risk and Don’t Write a Chosen One

This trope stands the test of time for some very good reasons: Audience wish-fulfillment as they live vicariously through the hero, automatic plot-induced agency for your protagonist, and automatic legitimate reasons for your protagonist to join the whirlwind adventure of the day.

I like chosen ones. We all have our favorite famous chosen ones and I’m not here to say the concept of a chosen one is bad at all.

However.

Those “automatic” windfalls that come pre-packaged with the trope can lead to the author taking shortcuts, or not thinking they have to put in more effort to write a compelling character, because they’re the “chosen one,” what more do you need?

Not writing your protagonist as commanded by the powers that be to participate in the plot forces you to get creative with why they’re here, what they want, and how they entrench themselves in the story. And most importantly, if the gods haven’t chosen them to act, they must now choose themselves to act.

—

I have never read Harry Potter and after its author-who-shan’t-be-named flushed her reputation down the toilet, I never will. I’ve seen the movies, they’re ok. I have no nostalgia-driven love for this franchise, and most of that comes from watching Harry be an incredibly boring protagonist.

Book readers correct me, but Harry is the poster child of “only exists so the audience can live vicariously” with generic heroic traits and nonexistent or at least unimportant side quirks and distinguishing hobbies, interests, or personality tics. He’s “brave” and “courageous” and “determined”... as most child protagonists of children’s books should be. He has zero flaws that come back to bite him in the ass. He acts the way he’s supposed to, not the way he should want to, as an independent being.

He’s the least interesting character in this entire cast, and I can’t stand Movie Ron. Ron, Hermione, Neville, or Draco would have made much more compelling protagonists and so much of this relies on the “Harry is important because the plot demands it” crutch.

Why is he the chosen one? Because his birthday happened at the right time of year? What is the story trying to say about the dichotomy between him and Voldemort? What about his personality, his wizard-societal stances on the many faux pas in this series, or the choices he makes, that makes him the chosen one? Why should I care?

You know who’s a great chosen one? Percy Jackson. Why? Because he understands the screwed up world he lives in on page 1. Being a demigod isn’t everything he ever dreamed and despite what Disney + wants you to believe, he’s got a crap bio dad who’s as disappointing in book one as Percy expects him to be.

He’s not even the chosen one by the end of the original series, and what a fantastic twist that was.

An infamously self-chosen protagonist has her own iconic hero quote: "I volunteer as tribute". Katniss is a nobody. She's not the evil president's daughter, she's not the child of a famously martyred revolutionary, she's just a girl who refuses to bow down to the reaping, refuses to let her sister get slaughtered, and volunteers for a death match that historically sees anyone living to survive another year cowering in relief. Yeah, she has some convenient skills in her archery and survival knowledge, but those matter because her district is starving, she learned through necessity.

Every second of her story, Katniss is fighting for her right to exist, and she only becomes a "chosen one" dragged around by the powers that be when she becomes marketable to the grand scheming of the actual revolutionaries, when, before, she didn't care about politics, she just wanted to save her sister. She matters because she chose compassion in a world where survival demands only serving yourself.

—

It’s so, so easy to start planning your book and make your cool fantasy world and figure out how your protagonist fits into it. So easy to say “well they’re the long-lost princess and the only heir to the throne” or “this magic amulet from her great great aunt is the key to saving the world” or “she’s the villain’s secret love child and the only one who can stop him because blood magic” or “this vague prophecy picked this little desert slave boy to bring balance to the Force”.

None of these stories are at fault for writing chosen ones.

But push yourself to let go of that crutch and come up with other reasons for why your hero is the hero. Usually this character has been isekai'd into magical-fantasy-land or magical-hidden-fantasy-urban-underbelly and you can still write that character.

Refusing to make them the chosen one demands one thing first and foremost: How is this outsider going to fight for their place to exist here? What do they bring to the table with their hobbies or interests or unique skillset that happens to be mighty applicable and useful in this new world? What is it about their personality that draws these strangers in? What do they want from this new world, and what are they willing to do to get it?

This choice demands you give your hero agency (though whether you give into those demands is up to you).

More importantly: I think it gives your audience agency, as they still live vicariously through their hero. Sure, lots of kids have lost their parents and live in horrid conditions like a cupboard under the stairs, but none of us will ever be “chosen” by omniscient wizard prophets. Harry would have immediately been a more compelling protagonist to me if he’d stumbled upon magical shenaniganry and fought for his place as some forgotten nobody mudblood.

Harry would have shown us his courage, instead of the story insisting he has it, we promise, just don’t think too hard about it.

Stop giving me characters who accept their destiny because God said so. Give me characters who fight tooth and nail for a destiny they discover on their own and I’ll root for them to succeed even more than someone compelled by force. Not everyone can be a chosen one, but everyone *can* choose themselves and decide to act.

—

With that said, I have an announcement! I have a new book in the works bereft of a prophecy-ordained hero. It’s time I put all my sagely writing wisdom to the test in a shiny published paperback myself. If you’ve learned anything from my blog in your writing journey, please subscribe for updates on the upcoming novel!

[eretzyisrael]

Prior to October 7 most of those who today worship Sinwar and Sinwarism were not interested in Hamas. It is BECAUSE Hamas massacred 1,000 people and kidnapped children and elderly that INSPIRED their adoration of Sinwar. Support for Sinwar is genocidal and it’s why they support him. They support him because he committed a genocide. This is the sole reason. Take away October 7 and these folk would not like Sinwar. One has to see Sinwar supporters as Nazis who were solely inspired by the murder of civilians. 

You can test this by seeing how many of the folk posting about Sinwar today ever cared about him before October 7. They adore him because of mass murder. They never backed two states they only back genocide and he helped them on their path; he was a proxy for them. 

We have to understand that today the Palestinian Authority or peace seeking two state supporting Palestinians do not inspire the pro-Palestine cause. October 7 was a game changer that shifted the cause entirely toward genocidal support. If there was no October 7 then you’d have the normal spectrum of voices, most of whom didn’t admire Hamas before Oct 7. 

It’s important to understand that todays cause has also been hijacked by the powerful media machines backed by Doha and Ankara pumping out pro-genocide propaganda to the western pro-Palestinian activist audience which now adores Sinwar 

We have to understand Oct 7 as a turning point that unites the far-left and far-right in the west where they saw 1,000 people massacred and this inspired them. They were programmed to like extremist acts and this gave them a historical genocidal act to latch onto 

We have to understand that these people abroad who adore Sinwar live vicariously through Hamas’ genocidal acts. Before October 7 most of them didn’t care about Hamas. Afterward they did. 

Another piece of evidence is when people compar Sinwar to fighters from their own country, such as I saw posts comparing him to Samurai or even Irish rebels. My question to these folks is always "did your folk heroes massacre 1,000 civilians in a day or kidnap children." 

Is the reason people admire the Samurai because the Samurai kidnapped kids? I don't think so. Therefore the attempt to make Sinwar into something he isn't is part of the whitewashing to hagiography 

It's important to recognize that anti-Jewish hatred is what unites the extreme left and extreme right in adoring Sinwar. That is why October 7 was required for them to like Sinwar. It is only because Sinwar was able to massacre 1,000 people, similar to one day in the Holocaust, that they adore him. For admirers of Sinwar he is a reincarnation of Hitler and they subconsciously are attracted to Hitler but they use Sinwar as their vehicle because they know in most circles openly liking Hitler isn't acceptable. 

The false AI-produced images that show Sinwar with an AK or M-16 in hand fighting the IDF are as removed from the reality of what he did then if one showed Hitler on the frontlines...it's false but it's intended to try to pretend Sinwar was a fighter, rather than a genocidal murderer. 

Seth Frantzman

@sfrantzman

[kasaru-chan]

So something that I find interesting about Chapter 99

and do pardon me if I'm not being very eloquent in my thoughts I woke up out of a dead sleep to say this.

Donavan here is in middle school and he doesn't have the imperial scholar cape yet. Even though Demetrius has one at around the same age.

Now while that might mean that Donavan may get one eventually (and Demetrius is basically a prodigy) I'd like to propose another theory:

Donavan was never an imperial scholar.

Quick edit: I completely missed it, but Donovan was an imperial scholar. Thank you to @peanutjinan for pointing that out

But clearly he wasn't a super genius like Demetrius is. Just your average student with a pessimistic world view (that is admittedly very understandable considering the times he's growing up in, it just goes to show the negative impact of war on children and how it perpetuates a cycle of violence)

End of edit.

It brings to mind a concern I have regarding Demetrius. You know how parents do that thing where they pressure their kids to take up acting or sports because its what the parents wished they could do and they are living vicariously through that child. I think Demetrius is going through that right now.

I think Demetrius genuinely has no thoughts in his head outside of studying and grades (the only thing he can think to bring up to his little brother is a discussion about his grades not... you know, the bus hijacking!!) and that's a little sad to me. We haven't had much but from what we can see, he has no friends, he has no hobbies, he has no meaningful relationship with his family (Yo Endo what does his mom think of him!?)

I just hope it changes for him.

[wu-sisyphus-gang]

Ruby: Penny!

Penny: Ruby! You weren’t in your rooms when I came by. Did something happen?

Ruby: It definitely did. We rented out a hotel room because the beds at the academy are too small.

Penny: Ruby! I want details!

Ruby: *giggles*

Weiss: Not too many details, I hope.

Penny: Of course not. Just the bare minimum. I live vicariously through Ruby.

Ruby: Penny! You don’t say things like that even if they are true.

Penny: You already knew that. Or at least I thought you did.

Ruby: There are principles to the thing!

Penny: What do you think Weiss? Jaune?

Jaune: Girl talk. None of my business.

Penny: Of course it’s your business. You and Weiss are most of what we talk about. How could it not be?

Jaune: The girl talk is none of my business even if I’m the subject of some of it.

Weiss: I never would have pegged Penny as a gossip.

Penny: Is that what I am?

Ruby: Well we have our mission so you two play nice.

Jaune: Sure thing sweetheart.

Weiss: If she’s sweetheart then what am I?

Jaune: Ice Qu-

Weiss: If you finish that your very next words will be ‘you punched me in the groin.’

Jaune: Princess just because I don’t say it…

Weiss: *smacks him with the back of her hand gently*

Jaune: No? Didn’t like princess either? I’ll come up with something. Ruby is easier to give petnames to.

Weiss: Maybe if you didn’t use ‘princess’ sarcasticly. You ruined it.

Jaune: Dang it. So close.

Weiss: Gods…

Penny: Is this how you flirt? Because I like it. It’s cute.

Jaune: Only when she lets me. Weiss is a tough nut to crack.

Weiss: Flatterer.

Ruby: Who would want to be tough?

Weiss: Who would want to be easy?

Ruby: Because it’s sweet when he tries. It’s sweet when you try too.

Weiss: He better do more than try.

Ruby: Oh psh! You weren’t giving him that this morning.

Weiss: *blushes* That’s different.

Ruby: Not that different. You were letting him have you for breakfast.

Weiss: Ruby!

Ruby: What? It’s just us girls.

Jaune: And me…

Ruby: Yeah but you were there. Weren’t you. And it’s just Penny. I tell her basically everything.

Jaune: How much is basically everything because some things should stay just between us girls.

Ruby: You’re really hung up on that.

Jaune: Kinda…

Ruby: It’s just girl talk. You know?

Jaune: Penny what’s the most risque thing you and Ruby have talked about?

Ruby: *sends Penny a pleading look*

Penny: Well we once talked about the size of your-

Weiss: Okay! Okay. The three of you are children.

Penny: I’m four.

Jaune: *laughs and high fives Penny*