#literally WHERE is he 🔫

[deusfoundry]

i thought the work option for quality time would have sylus actually working 😭 hes still holding a gun 😭😭

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i want nothing more than for Ezra & Thrawn to be not enemies, not friends, but a secret third thing - roommates

[can-i-see-your-passport-please]

Gordon voice I hate Benrey so much if he leaves my line of sight I'm gonna start crying

[chronal-anomaly]

Someone put the doomfist fight on my Twitter timeline time to be annoying

[animmal]

getting a handle on mavis is kinda 😵‍💫 bc on the one hand she's an empath (literally) and is shown to generally have more emotional intelligence/maturity than dr🅰️x/nebs/rocket combined, but at the same time she apparently saw no problem at all whatsoever w kidnapping kevin 🥓 for peter 😭 which is like???? i mean maybe those two things can be true at the same time but like... How. 😭 is she an empath or is she okay w taking people against their will to give as a present to her brother ?

[kn11ves]

yall gotta give other old russian authors apart from dostoevsky and tolstoy a chance. pushkin bunin gorky bulgakov turgenev goncharov and chekhov are all whimpering and crying in a corner im so for real

[verytendou]

Upon reflection i need it posted on the blog itself and not just my tags that if you think any part of nobara’s treatment in jjk was a feminism #win that you both owe me $700 and need to get off my blog

[gyuswhore]

Grease (the tragedy)

“Careful, those marks on the floor aren’t just oil and paint.”

jeon wonwoo x reader

word count: 5.8k

warnings: smut [minors DNI], fluff, angst, mechanic!wonu, annoyances to lovers, blind date gone wrong but then gone right, kissing, clit stuff, oral (f. rec), thigh fucking (oop), this all happens at a desk LMAO, title is a what I thought was a funny spin on how people say "grease (the musical)"....has nothing to do with the musical though but lots to do with actual grease!!!

synopsis: In which you have to sit through one of the worst dates of your life, followed by the insistent tug of fate and compulsion that lead you straight back to where you'd sworn you'd never go.

[a/n]: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY WIFE CAMOTHY @highvern everyone go say happy birthday to cam or ill appear in your room at night 🔫 anygays HAVE FUN READING THIS I hope this is all the sexy wonu content you wanted, I cant wait for your reaction hehehhehe

and also bigbigbigbig thank you to jessifer @the-boy-meets-evil for proofing this for me!!! ily heh

and and to everyone reading this who is not cam, I hope you enjoy reading mechanic!wonu as much as I liked writing him heheh PLS REMEMBER TO REBLOG AND TELL ME UR THOTS it could be in the tags, replies, an ask literally anything!!!! id love to hear what you guys think!!!!

masterlist

 [You]: do you think he died on the way [Liv]: hes still not there??? [You]: what do you think????? [Liv]: let me ask Amelia [You]: dont bother [You]: he can show up whenever he wants im leaving in 5 [Liv]: you promised you’d sit thru this!! [You]: sit thru what? an empty seat across from me???

Liv doesn’t respond immediately, and you immediately know she’s buggered off to ask her cousin why your date still wasn’t here. 

It’s not like you couldn’t have asked him yourself, the sparse textbox sitting just under Liv’s contact. You open it to inspect the contents. 

[liv’s cousin’s something]: Amelia gave me your number [liv’s cousin’s something]: friday night at the sage&salt at 7  [liv’s cousin’s something]: is that okay [You]: uh hey [You]: yeah that’s fine

Today 7:20 PM

[You]: im here?

The first thread of texts were enough to make you feel like this was some cold business meeting instead of a date, knowing wherever this would lead would be either the city dump or off a cliff. Liv was hearing none of it, taking the guilt tripping route, saying she’d already committed and her cousin was irritating enough even without a scuffle.

So when Friday evening came around you’d pulled on the first dress your fingers could find, took all of ten minutes fighting with your makeup to make it look like you did something and left the house with zero expectations. 

Despite that, as you see a man walk into the establishment dressed like he’d gotten into a fight with a squid and a paper shredder, you feel the stone in your chest tank into the abyss. Zero expectations, and he’s somehow managed to strike out anyway. 

The jacket looks like he’s put it on as a weak cover for the grime stains on his shirt and trousers, a couple jet black splatters across the outfit to really pull the whole thing together. It’s not like he looked homeless or anything, his face surprisingly handsome with his hair pushed away from his forehead. Although he remains looking like he’d been playing football in some neighbourhood parking lot before remembering he had an adult appointment too. 

You’d never seen the man in your life, but your gut told you this was the shit texter who’d kept you waiting for nearly an hour. He seems to notice too, eyes locking from across the restaurant as the waitress leads him to your table. 

“Wonwoo,” you greet with a difficult smile, half sure it came out as a grimace. “Right?”

“Yeah,” he huffs as he practically slams back down on the chair, and you wonder for a moment how the legs didn’t give out. He says your name and you nod. “Sorry I’m late, I got a call in the parking lot.”

He’s been in the parking lot this entire time?!

It’s like you’ve been doused in gasoline and lit on fire, yet somehow needing to give him a shaky reply anyway. 

“O–oh, I see.”

The waitress saves you from spitting in his face when she asks if you were ready to order. 

Dinner was off the table, as you discussed with Liv who forwarded it to her cousin to her–whoever it was that set up this god awful date–and agreed on dessert and perhaps a drink. 

“I’ll have the chocolate cake,” you request in an attempt to make this somewhat better. You consider for a moment before asking for a drink as well, “And a dry gin martini, please.”

“Um,” he staggers as he barely skims the menu, ultimately flipping it closed. “I’ll have the same, I guess.”

Deep voice. You might’ve liked that if you weren’t already so peeved. 

The waitress disappears with the menus, leaving you two alone for the first time. 

“So,” you start with an exhale. “How do you know Amelia?”

“Her husband.”

“I see.”

Silence. 

“How do you know her husband?”

He sighs like this is all inconveniencing him, and it irks you to an irrespective degree. Like you wanted to be here either. 

“He brings his car to the workshop alot, became friends somewhere along the line.”

“Workshop?”

He looks a little startled, cocking his head to the side. “I’m a mechanic? Did Olivia–was it–not tell you?”

“No, she didn’t.”

It’s silent yet again as the man across from you refuses to elaborate. You curse as you ask him a follow up question. If there was anything you hated more than shouldering a dead conversation, it was sitting through an awkward silence. 

One hour. You’d sit through this for one more hour and then you’d leave. 

“What kind of cars do you work on?”

“Expensive ones,” he answers. You might’ve kicked yourself if he’d ended it at that, but he continues with a purse of his lips. “Ones that rich people abuse to an inch of the machine’s life and wonder why the dealership gives up on it. Vintage pieces too.”

“Have I heard of it?”

“The cars?”

“No, I mean,” you let out a breath. “Your workshop.”

“Jeon Motors, just a couple streets down actually.”

You did know what he was talking about, not expecting to recognise it through the empty question, passing by it on multiple occasions in this part of the city.

“Oh, I’ve seen it a few times.”

“Yeah, we’ve been there for a while.”

“Family business?”

“Uh–sort of.” 

“Okay,” you sigh in an irritated laugh. This was going to be a very difficult hour. “Keep that to yourself too.”

“Is there a problem?”

Just as you lift your eyes to lock with his, a ready yes, there is actually a problem on your tongue, there’s an intrusion. 

“Here are your chocolate cakes,” the waitress places the cakes down, and then the drinks. “And your dry gin martinis. Do you guys need anything else?” By the time the waitress is gone you’ve somewhat forced yourself to put that sudden surge of flames out, to a degree at least. 

“Okay,” he sighs, grabbing his glass and downing nearly half the contents. He emerges, wiping a bit of a spill from the corner of his mouth. “Let’s get this out of the way.”

“Hm?” He’s speaking to you with a very weird surge of intensity, and it confuses you.

“Neither of us wanna be here. You’re clearly trying to be hospitable but I’d really rather you not, especially when we’re both doing this to get our respective ticks off our hides.”

There isn’t much you can do but stare at him. 

“Have I misjudged your advances?” he asks over his glass, sharp eyes piercing. 

“No!” you yelp, reaching for your drink yourself, taking big sips only to emerge sputtering and heaving. 

Your date looks like he’s rising out of his chair when you raise a hand to stop him. 

“No,” you repeat, less jumpy this time. “I guess we could’ve cleared that out from before.”

Did he…snort?

“Sorry.” Dropping his chin to his chest, he composes himself. 

“What?” you ask, remaining annoyed as ever. 

“Nothing.”

That does it. You slam your now empty glass down on the table, slipping your fork out of the napkin a little forcefully, the metal glinting in the light of the restaurant. You dig into a corner of the cake and shove it in your mouth. 

If he was gonna be rude, you could be too. 

“I don’t know about hospitable.” You swallow. “But I assumed not being an ass was kind of an unwritten rule for any situation really. Including the ones you’d rather not be in.”

Wonwoo stares at you with a blank face, his cake untouched. “I’m being an ass. My laugh couldn’t have offended you that much.”

“So you did pick that up,” you comment. “With the way this conversation’s going I would’ve thought it flew right over your engine.”

“I’d argue your laugh was the least offensive thing you’ve done tonight.” You plunge your fork into your cake again. “But clearly we’re in different realms of etiquette.”

Your eyes meet the rough stains on his attire, and then his own that bore into yours like a challenge. The cake isn’t too sweet, rich just the right amount and texturally sound. Maybe something good did come out of this fiasco. 

“Okay fine,” he announces, sitting up straighter. “I apologise.”

“For laughing?”

“And for being obscenely late.”

“And?”

“And…” he genuinely looks like he’s struggling to figure it out, but catches your eyes flickering to his tattered and stained outfit. “And for my entirely inappropriate dressing sense. You’ll have to forgive me for that one, oil and grime are my spoils of war.”

“Wear it like a badge, mister mechanic, but perhaps somewhere it’s appreciated.” 

Wonwoo has already finished his drink, his cake remaining untouched. “You’re quite adamant on disliking me.”

“And you’re quite adamant on being a horrid conversationalist.”

The corners of his mouth lift the slightest bit. Opening his mouth to respond, you cut him off. “Cars don’t talk? Or perhaps, machines are easier to understand?”

“More like I don’t care to be personable.”

“That can’t be good for business.”

“The cars speak for themselves.”

He’s a weird one. Even more so when he offers to pay the entire bill, promising you he wasn’t lying when he said he was good at what he does, and to “make up for lost personality points.” You manage to pay your half anyway, considering the circumstances. 

“Can you at least let me drive you home?” Wonwoo asks as you both step out of the establishment soon after. 

“Depends.” You fix the strap of your bag. “Will it fall apart on the highway?”

The blaring white of the restaurant's outdoor lights backlight Wonwoo to make him look like some sad angel. He turns to you, the same slight smirk that seems to be plastered on his face. “Why don’t you find out?”

“What do you mean sell it? I got this thing a year ago!” 

There isn’t much you can do but sigh loudly as you listen to Olivia talk about the state of her car, the one that cost too much to justify but she seemed to use and abuse like a very replaceable toy truck. 

Leaning against the hood of the darn thing, you talk to her. “The dealership is giving you a shit deal to take it off your hands, you might as well try your luck.”

The look on her face is easy to read as she silences. Not convinced in the slightest, waiting for the conversation to end just so she could figure it out on her own. Sighing loudly, you look back to the dark beauty with a crate of issues that make it spit and sputter to a stop every few weeks. 

“How much did you say the repairs cost again?”

“Enough to put me on food stamps,” she whines through her frustration, tears pricking against her eyes as they glisten under the neighbourhood streetlights. “Why are you smirking like that?!”

“It’s just,” you pause as you consider your next words, pressing your lips together. “This is a little bit your fault.”

Lies, it was entirely her fault. 

Liv stares like you’ve just offended her, which you’re sure you have.

“Care to share how this possible bankruptcy could be my fault?"

“Because you drive the thing like you have a secret reserve buried somewhere in Tenerife.”

“My apologies for making a habit of not being a public nuisance and going forty on a national highway.”

“Your speed-o-metre is not the issue here.”

“Yes, of course, everything’s my fault.”

“Liv, please!” You groan loudly. “Just…let’s try putting up a listing tomorrow. Consider the prospects and you can decide from there.”

Sagging her shoulders and stretching her neck, Liv decides to simply trudge back indoors in silence. You take it as a begrudging yes, and follow her inside. 

That very night, when you were at the very cusp of falling into the dark space of sleep, your brain re-awakens before your eyes do. A jolt as the memory comes back to you of the many months ago, sitting in that restaurant across from a man who was too handsome for the personality he seemed to sire. 

“Expensive ones,” he had said. “Ones that rich people abuse to an inch of the machine’s life and wonder why the dealership gives up on it.”

How fitting. 

“Are you going to explain or should I explode instead?” 

You’d mentally prepared for the bombardment of accusations from Liv, her questioning perfectly right as you yourself cringed at the thought of showing your face here of all places. The one last one that’d officially banned her from ever setting you up with an individual of her choosing ever again. 

Hearing only silence as her answer, she appeals; “I thought he was the worst date of your life.”

“Nothing to do with his skills as a mechanic,” you mumble, refusing to make eye contact. 

“And everything to do with this being a horrible idea anyway!” Liv stares up at the sign on top of the garage. Jeon Motors. “What makes you think this guy can fix my car?”

What did make you think he could fix Liv’s car? If you’d known you might have given her an answer, but as you stare at the giant signboard that you’ve driven past for longer than you can remember, you can’t help but feel this place has been haunting you. Just a little. 

You can’t help but feel the tingle of goosebumps rise on your skin, the hairs across the expanse standing up at the thought of walking inside. There was no way you could differentiate the reaction from plain nerves or from the cringing drills that sound all the way outside the establishment. Regardless, you make an attempt to look confident as you make your strides into the pungent of the workshop. 

The first thing you note is how…clean everything is. Cleaner than any other workshop you’ve walked into anyway. 

The interior is bigger than it looks from the outside, the ginormous hall hosting about a dozen cars within your eyeshot alone. One side of the great hall holds an array of parked cars in different stages of dismantled and deconstructed, while the other side is lined with contraptions that look like stripped and enlarged elevators. 

Once you’ve inhaled a beyond recommended amount of smoke fumes and listened past all of the clanging, banging and sparks, you register the people that are elbow deep in the hoods of the vehicle they’re working on, enough to leave you and Liv standing at the entrance of an establishment that you can barely make sense of. 

“Can I help you?” A man in stained beige overalls approaches your wide eyed pair, face half covered in his baseball hat and hands occupied with a rag. 

To your slightest dismay, it isn’t the man you’re looking for.

“Uh– is Wonwoo here?” you ask. 

“He’s in a meeting right now. Are you a friend?” 

No, just a failed love interest.

“He,” you falter. If you weren’t a friend…then what were you? “He gave me his card.”

“Do you need help with your car?”

“Mine, actually,” Liv pipes. “It’s outside if you wanna take a look first.”

With one sweeping look across the warehouse, your eyes land on one of the few doors on the left. You register the plain look of it for barely a moment before joining Liv outside. 

By the time her car has been rolled and parked inside for a more thorough inspection, it’s taken you every last grain of your willpower to not stalk back out and wait in your car. For whatever reason, you can’t help but feel a very familiar spasm of irritation spark through you. Here you are, left anxiously waiting for the same man for a second time, merely feet away but remaining occupied with more important things. 

At the very least, the multiple hands prodding around the car’s engine were being somewhat of use, attempting to survey the same issues that had been looked at about a dozen times before. You silently promise to be a better person if this trip wouldn’t be for vain.  

“Am I late for something again?” 

Your throat is suddenly clogged as you open your mouth and no sound graces your presence. The face that meets you has his eyebrows raised as he stares at you in expectation, a ghost of a smile on his face. 

“W–Wonwoo, hi, um.” You clear your throat loudly, heat cursing your cheeks. “No, of course not.”

“To what do I owe the pleasure after…four months?” he asks, hands on his hips and his back straightened.

“I…my friend’s car needed to be looked at so…”

“Ah, of course!” He turns to where you’ve motioned, looking at the popped hood of the car his employees are working on. “I’ll take a look at it myself, don’t worry about it.”

He’s already walking away, towards the car and leaving you a ways away from the action. You stare at his back; the overalls tied at the waist and the stained white T-shirt that clings to his form from the humidity.

Wonwoo remains a man of a few words, and you remain at wits end about it all. 

A loud honk gives you something to do as you jump at the sound so up close, scrambling to move away from the smack centre as another car pulls into the garage. 

“Careful, those marks on the floor aren’t just oil and paint.” Wonwoo snickers from his place hunched over the hood as he cranes his neck to look at you. 

You walk over to where he is to get out of the way. “Was that meant to sound like an innuendo?”

“I was talking about the occasional running over someone’s foot,” he answers. “Not sure what you were thinking.” 

Ignoring the jab, you note that it was now only you and him crowding the car, “Where’s Olivia?”

“Went to look at spare parts.” You watch him as his gloved hands reach further into the enclave and yank at something hard. 

“So you can fix it?” 

“The car? It’ll take a couple days but it’s not really an issue.”

Furrowing your brows, you press on, “But the dealership—”

“Dealerships are the spawn of the devil,” he grunts as he finally wrenches out a spare nut or bolt or something that’s covered in oil. “Let me guess, they wanted her to sell it back to them?”

It’s your turn to raise your brows. “Yes. They tried fixing it, but it'd just stop again.”

“Because they’ve been fixing the symptoms.” He raises his eyes to meet yours, hands occupied with rubbing the part in his hands relatively clean with a rag. “They haven’t bothered to do anything about the actual problem.” 

“Because that’s gonna cost…?”

“Couple hundred, give or take,” he announces nonchalantly, turning his focus back to the engine. 

“But—” That’s it?

“Fifty extra for every question I have to answer after this.” You briefly wonder if Wonwoo’s eyes were always this piercing, boring into your soul like he didn’t need words to know what was going on with you. 

“Fine,” you huff, moving to drag a chair over, mostly just so you could have reason to break eye contact, and plop down as you watch him work. 

The more you think about it, the more you can find yourself unbothered by his strange behaviour. He wasn’t bleak, but nowhere near one of the more interesting people you’ve met. Taking the opportunity to really scan the man head to toe, you can’t say you find anything truly concrete to be this put off by him. 

Not much of a talker, but with the times you’ve prayed for a man that knew when to shut up sometimes, you wonder how much you can actually complain about this boon in particular. 

Besides, he was a looker, and you were completely content shutting your trap if it meant you got to shamelessly ogle at him from this close. 

“You know, this place looks bigger than it does from the outside.”

Wonwoo stares pointedly. 

You raise a shoulder in nonchalance, “Wasn’t a question!”

He simply huffs as he mumbles, “More length than breadth I suppose.”

“What are those things called?” you ask as you watch a sedan get lifted into the on some platform on the other end of the row. 

Glancing back, he answers, “Post lift, car lift, whatever you wanna call it.”

“What does it do?”

“Take a wild guess.”

“Touché.” 

Glancing back at him, you catch sight of his stained shirt once again. “Is that the same thing you wore to our date?”

Chin to chest, he registers what he’s wearing, hands still working on pulling bolts and boxes out of the hood. “Have about twenty of the same shirt, I can never be too sure.”

“You’re impossible.”

He smirks, “Touché.” 

You questioned if this was a mistake. 

Olivia could pick up her car herself, so why did you insist to be the one that did it? As you pay the taxi driver, you feel your ankles lock for a moment as you move to slip out of the cab. Frozen, you hear the driver ask you if everything was alright, to which your legs seem to work again, finally foot to gravel in front of the dreaded workshop.

The Jeon Motors sign blares the same as it always has in the afternoon light, glinting as it encourages you to walk in and do one of the stupider things you’ve done in life. Other than the ridiculous outfit you’ve put on, of course. 

But alas, as you hand over your slip to one of the many mechanics in the workshop, you find yourself praying he wasn’t here after all, that perhaps you could miss him as you leave and never have to see him again. 

Somebody yells out his name, and the dream drifts away like smoke. 

Finding the courage, you look up to where the man shouted for him, and immediately wish you hadn’t. 

Wonwoo remains in his overalls, the same ones that he had tied to his waist the last time you saw him. His undershirt however…

The tank top is revealing too much for you to pretend you don’t care, his hair remaining pushed back and away from his forehead as he walks over to you in what feels like slow motion. He takes the slip that he does not need, smiling at you as he says his hellos. 

“Car’s all fixed up, just need some papers that need signing and you’re all set.”

“Oh, but Liv isn’t here today.”

“That’s alright, you can sign them too,” he reassures, motioning for you to walk with him towards the car. “The car was alright in the test drives, revving hasn’t caused any problems either.”

He halts in front of the now (supposedly) fixed black sedan and pats the hood lightly, “If anything happens tell her to bring it straight here, although it shouldn’t have any more problems.”

“What’s your rate of return on customers?” you ask, a slight smirk on your face.

He thinks for a moment, “Pretty crap. But I guess that means I’m doing something right.”

You consider yourself something of a helicopter parent when it comes to your own car, but perhaps you’d change that if it meant you’d get to come here a little more often. 

Goodness, what’s gotten into you.

Wonwoo’s smiling too, and for a brief moment the silence is nearly awkward. A pause before he proposes leaving. 

“Shall we go to the office then?” 

Nodding eagerly, you trail behind him as he leads you towards the other end of the workshop, passing by even more cars in all their stripped or constructed glory. Glancing in front, you catch sight of Wonwoo’s back, ensnared for a moment before you snap your head away, reciting every curse word you know like a mantra. 

“It’s less hot in here too, keep the air on all the time.” Wonwoo stands in front of the plain doors, hands on the handle to wrench it open. You recognise it as the same door you had noted a few days ago. “Would you like anything? Coffee, tea?”

“Um, just water is fine, thanks.”

It’s quite plain, beige and leather against cream walls and unfittingly white lights. There’s a desk on one corner that’s beyond cluttered with more papers than you can register, pens and other office supplies mixed into the disorganised chaos of the large tabletop.

“Sorry about the mess, I can never find time to sort through it.” To your surprise, the light tinge of his cheeks suggest he might actually feel a little embarrassed. 

Cute. 

There’s cabinets that line on one of the far walls, and you watch him take his gloves off to open it and reach for a cup. The white porcelain emerges stained with an ashy grey as his fingers betray him. He looks flustered, glancing at his hands and back up to the cabinet. 

You can’t help but laugh a little, moving forward to help. “It’s alright, let me.”

“Sorry,” he apologised again, with a sheepish look on his face. “I’ll, um, wash this off.”

“Go on, I’m here,” you reassure as you move towards the water dispenser in the corner to fill your clean cup. 

He returns with significantly cleaner hands and apologises one last time. “Seems all I do around you is apologise.”

You have the good humour to chuckle, “So I’ve noticed.”

He does well to clear out most of the clutter that’s on his desk, leaving enough room to set down a few pieces of paper as you take a seat on the opposite side. 

As you scan through the papers, he attempts to make sober conversation. “You should…bring your car around for inspections if you want.”

“Oh? Even if I ask a million questions?”

“I can make an exception or two,” he grins. 

“And if you charge me double?”

“Might not charge you at all.”

“Might?” you question as you lift the pen he’d given you to sign the first space. 

“Might.”

“And what’re the conditions for that?” 

He doesn’t answer as he ponders and you fill in the second blank. “I’ll have to think about that.”

You snort before you can help it, your last signature coming out a little wonky as your hands shake. Turning the papers over to him, you continue, “Well then, let me know when you figure it out.”

He stares pointedly as he accepts the papers before dropping his eyes again, “Can I?”

“Hm?”

“Can I? Let you know?” 

It’s like you’ve been frozen over, the typewriter in your mind jamming as it punches out the implications of what he’s saying. 

“It seems, at least to me, that we may have gotten off on the wrong foot,” he continues. 

You hesitate. “I think so too.”

“I…I don’t want to put anything like pressure on you but–” 

“Would you like to try the new gelato place downtown this week?” you ask finally as you save him from his misery. “If…you’d like.”

He looks stunned for a moment before he’s scrambling, “Oh–of course! Yes, anytime is fine with me.”

“Great,” you smile, lifting from your seat. “It’s a date.”

“I’ll promise to wash my hands this time…and my shirt. And I won’t be late.” 

“Let’s not make promises we can’t keep,” you tease. 

You’re nearing the door as he follows behind, and just as you’re about to pull down on the handle, you hear him say your name. 

Turning around, almost too eagerly, you look up at him in expectation. He’s close, almost right behind you as he looks like he’s debating whether opening his mouth is a good idea. 

“Are you doing anything else today?” 

“Um,” you stutter for a moment. “I don’t have to drop off the car till later tonight, that’s all really.”

He swallows. “Do you wanna stay? Just a little while. We can stay in here, nobody comes in anyway.”

You aren’t entirely sure why you said yes, because you did actually have dinner plans with Liv later tonight, but the teeny tiny voice in your mind egged you on anyway. Besides, Liv wouldn’t mind, not if you were cancelling for this.

This entailed the very friendly contact of Wonwoo’s tongue in your mouth, and the extremely cordial way it seemed to caress your insides. If somebody asked you how it led to this, you don’t think you’d have an answer. Not that you care, especially when his hands are grabbing your waist and hips like that.

He’s already locked the door, reassuring you that nobody would find their boss and client in the smack dab middle of the devil’s tango. You take his word for it, relishing in the way his hot breath hits your skin below your ears, his mouth sucking under your earlobes as you whimper ever so quietly. 

Your hands are on his exposed biceps, feeling him up all to your heart's content. “Do you–Do you always wear stuff like this?”

He emerges, wet lipped and eyes trained. “So I wasn’t imagining it.”

“Imagining what?” you ask as you let him unbuckle your trousers.

“Please. Like you weren’t stripping me with your eyes.”

If you were warm before you, you're boiling up now. Were you being so obvious?

“It’s alright,” he reassures as you feel his fingers make contact with the crotch of your panties, pushing in to put pressure on your clit. “Wouldn’t be here if I hadn’t picked up on it.”

You feel his fingers push the dampening fabric away as his fingers make contact with your hole, coating his fingers in the arousal that’s made itself known. It’s hard to not hiss at the way he begins to circle it, thanking the universe that the loud noises of the workshop outside were masking whatever evidence of the heinous crime you were committing inside. 

Back against the couch in his office, you settle into the cushions once you feel him rub at your clit, one hand spreading your lips apart as he continues to massage your own wetness onto your throbbing cunt. 

When he retreats you almost cry out, but are smothered when he plunges two fingers into your hole instead, curling them almost immediately inside you. The consistent brush of the tips of his fingers on your walls are making it difficult to keep your eyes open, and absolutely impossible to keep your moans at bay. 

“Wonwoo, that’s so good, fuck.”

Through your closed eyes, you don’t note when Wonwoo gets on his knees. But you do feel him yank your trousers off entirely, and you definitely feel him place his wet mouth flush on your lower lips, sucking at your clit as he continues to pump his fingers in and out of you mercilessly. 

That’s all it takes for your noises to become increasingly high pitched, hands buried in his beautiful hair as he continues to pleasure you beyond imagination. 

“I’m so close, keep going, please, it feels so–”

He somehow buries his face in deeper, sucking harder, licking faster, and it’s enough for you to finally feel yourself collapsing on the inside, your composure dissolving as you moan so loud you’re sure they can hear it outside, even through all the clanging and revs of cars. 

There’s no way for you to know how long you lay there slumped against the couch cushions, but when you hear Wonwoo speak to you in your ear, you answer. 

“Was that okay?”

“More than okay,” you say as you grab his face and pull his lips to yours, tasting the tang in his mouth from your arousal. “Do you have a condom?”

“I–fuck,” he thinks for a moment. “I don’t think I do.”

You try not to feel too disappointed, but you sigh into his mouth anyway. 

“Can I fuck your thighs?” you hear him ask, and you might have just orgasmed again, untouched. 

“Fuck, yes you can.” 

With a yelp, you feel yourself lifted off the couch as you wrap your arms around Wonwoo’s neck, letting him guide you to his desk. “Wonwoo!”

You hear a loud crash of the desk being stripped of all its inhabitants, and your back hitting the cool of the table top. 

Wonwoo unties the arms of his overalls around his waist, letting the legs pool to the floor before slipping his hard cock out of his boxers. 

You don’t see it as you feel him lock your knees together and lift both your calves to rest on one of his shoulders. But you do feel it as he pushes the head into the seam of your thighs, watching the indent as the pink of his dick appears before you through the skin of your thighs. 

Wonwoo’s face is contorted as he pulls back and pushes back through again, this time brushing against your still sensitive clit. You gasp at contact, and immediately feel him thrusting faster. 

“Wonwoo,” you grunt. “Lower.”

He obliges, pushing his dick lower so it can rub flush against your clit as he begins to roughen up his pace. 

You moan as you feel his free hand that isn’t holding your legs trail to the ends of your shirt, caressing over your stomach to pull it up and reveal your bra clad tits. He pushes his hands under the nearest cup and begins to grope you so wonderfully with his big, warm hands. Rolling the bud between his fingers, you can only grasp onto his wrists as a handheld to keep you down on earth. 

The desk beneath you is rattling with noise, the full drawers making themselves known as Wonwoo pounds into your thighs like he would die if he stopped, mouth coming in contact with whatever skin of your legs he could reach, his breath fanning the side of your knees. 

You’re close again, and you know he is too with the way his thrusts are beginning to grow sloppy. 

“There,” he pants. “Almost.”

You orgasm for the second time, the throb your clit beyond comprehension as the rough of his dick slides across your clit mercilessly. 

“Cum like this, Wonwoo please I need to see you cum.”

And he does, shooting the heft of his load to cover your already wet cunt and thighs, landing on your stomach as he continues to ride out his high between your legs. 

The back of your head hits the table as you take in gulps of air through the aftermath of it all. Wonwoo is putting his weight on the back of your thighs, holding onto the table for support. 

“Oh, Liv is never gonna let me live this down,” you pant, lolling your head to one side as you register him. 

He peers up at you through his hair, the stupid smirk on his face, “Do you care?”

You’re smiling a little too when you answer, “Not really.”

And then your legs are off his shoulders as he nestles between them instead, diving in to lift your head and kiss you. 

And you let him, although you wouldn’t really call it too much of a kiss—not when the both of you were smiling like idiots through the clash. 

[oldmanontumbler]

God, Lobcorp Tumblr must go CRAZY...

〔3 notes〕

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🏓 wandering-cunt Follow

whyyyyyy is like everyone here they/them NB im not transphobic i swear i just miss WOMEN 😩

🧃 shrimply-put Follow

Lol there's literally a ton of women??? Like 75% of Wellcheers Club is girls.

🏓 wandering-cunt Follow

OUT OF MY WAY GAYBOYS IM BOUT TO GET IT

🏓 wandering-cunt Follow

WHY AM I ON A BOAT

〔53,209 notes〕

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🪼 tamedandwilling Follow

For the last time, there is no such thing as an "inferior" or "unimportant" abnormality. There is beauty where your foolish minds cannot seek it. What's most important can't be seen by the eye.

🦢 morally-grey-swan6 Follow

the mushroom chunk wont fuck you bro!!!

〔235 notes〕

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🛀🏻 yum-yum-12345 Follow

Hey guys just a friendly reminder to always trigger tag pictures of your abnormalities!!! You dont know if a low level agent could see em or if you could just end up hurting someone so please be mindful!!!!

🪇 ass-iyah Follow

you literally have bloodbath as your pfp.....

🛀🏻 yum-yum-12345 Follow

And I recommend you fall into it!!!! 🥰🥰🥰

❄️ transmasc-ice-queen Follow

This site is free. But god do we pay for it.

〔762 notes〕

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🪇 ass-iyah Follow

🌌 memory-of-emily Follow

My brother in Blue Star they are BOXES

🚦qlipothocary Follow

why r u named ASS-IYAH if u don wanna fuck the ASIYAH sephirot...

🪇 ass-iyah Follow

you can't make anything from "briah"

🧃 shrimply-put Follow

You can make "Brian!"

🪇 ass-iyah Follow

no one is named brian

🪞 born2weak Follow

Hi. - brian

🪇 ass-iyah Follow

go make your own post -> -> ->

〔2698 notes〕

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🍣 magicalgirlpussy Follow

What do you think happens if you drink a bottle of enkephalin and then a can of wellcheers and then forbidden tree sap and then get stroked by porccubus 🤔😏🤯

🍣 magicalgirlpussy Follow

bad news guys they transfered me to Safety for this post 😔🤕😵‍💫

🍣 magicalgirlpussy Follow

What happens if you make a playlist of fragment of the universe, silent orchestra, theresia, and singing machine? 🥵😈😳

🍣 magicalgirlpussy Follow

I don't need sleep I need answers

〔944 notes〕

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🌌 memory-of-emily Follow

PSA

If you see something that looks like THIS

Do NOT go near it!!!

That is NOT a flower that can KILL you!!!

REBLOG TO SPREAD THE WORD

💝 laetittiesss Follow

Nah that's just a flower 🥰

🌌 memory-of-emily Follow

You can't be this wilfully ignorant when peoples LIVES are at stake that is Meat Lanterns BREACHING FORM!!!!

💝 laetittiesss Follow

Actually I work for Information Team and thats just a pretty flower!

🌌 memory-of-emily Follow

STOP REBLOGGING THIS POST YOU LITERALLY FUCKING HAVE BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS

💝 laetittiesss Follow

Nah all i have on my hands is the pretty smell of a flower :))

❄️ transmasc-ice-queen Follow

Hey Lae what do you think this is

💝 laetittiesss Follow

Flour 🥰🌸🌺🌷

👤 palehorse-deactivated04959

Is this like??? L corps version of the 'sharks are smooth' joke???

💝 laetittiesss Follow

Dreaming Current? hes a smooth boi!

👤 palehorse-deactivated04959

Im goi ng to thro w myself into the blue Star

〔4302 notes〕

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________________________________

[😎 anonymous asked: ]

[Pale damage isn't even that bad???]

\_______________________________/

🫦 smashorpassabnotourney Follow

Go here.

🧜🏾‍♀️ m3lt1ngg-l0v3rr Follow

waŋna raıse mƴ 😟😐 to a 😀?‽ 💦 perform attachmeŋt worƙ here ❤️‍🔥🙈🙉🙊 ww.do31o9

🫦 smashorpassabnotourney Follow

Not right now Melting Love I'm sending death threats.

[red-viewe]

general lilia x reader thoughts 🔫 (part two✌)

COLORED TEXT IS FAE LANGUAGE (tw: metions of bl99d, swearing)

Part 1 part 3

---

'Fuck my life.'

Here's the tea. You found a half-dead but sexy asf fae on your sidewalk and decided, 'Hey! Let's bring him in, warp him up and fall asleep!' Which was a stupid decision, because now, you're leaning against Mr. Hot Guy's head, pretending to be asleep, because right now, THE FAE GUY IS AWAKE AND HE MIGHT KILL YOU.

After about 5 minutes of awkward silence, this happened.

"I know you're awake."

He said, as he slowly started to get up from the couch. "W-wow, i didn't think you would notice..." God, get yourself together, dude.

"Where am I?" He says, turning to the very sweaty(?) you. God, this man is so hot.

"You're in my house...in the woods, a-and you shouldn't stand up right now, you're still injured.

" You abruptly stand and gently push him down back on to the couch.

"I'm Y/n L/n, by the way... " Mr. Fae still seemed to be om guard.

"Why did you save me? Don't you know about the war going on right now?" He asks in a stern tone (which was kind of hot...).

"Well, war is stupid when you can literally solve everything without death." You say as you walked away into the kitchen.

"...Is that so.." He mumbled.

---

It toke time for the fae to tell you his name, you respected that. You wouldn't tell a stranger your name either. (Expect you did, but we ignore that) Afte a while, he finally said to juat call him Liliy. Being shot in the stomach with an iron arrow, it toke Liliy time to be able to actually move, but it was progress.

Your days suddenly became more interesting, as you spent more time with him, learning more and more about him.

Like how he's insanely good at games, even when he doesn't try, or when he sometimes helps you prepare for the day before you open the bar.

---

"I'm not playing with you anymore." You cry in a joking tone as you lose yet again another game of chess.

"Pft, if you'd like, perhaps you'd desire an easier game? May i suggest rock paper sissors?" Liliy says with mischievous smirk on his face.

"Oh, screw you."

'Is this man trying to poison me?' Was the first thought you had when you opened the lunch Liliy attempted to make for you.

"It can't be that bad..." You say out loud, slightly gagging when you scooped up some of the meal(?) onto your spoon.

---

And...sweet moments, which made your heart beat a little faster and your cheeks warm up.

---

"Sleeping late, beastie?" Liliy said, as he toke some of your hair into his hands and started combing playing with it, making you blush when you felt his breath a little too close.

"Mhm, I'm doing some stinky taxes before i go to bed." You said, writing down information. After a while of liliy playing with your hair, you started to feel drowsy and fell asleep, waking up the next day on your bed, with a half asleep liliy next to you, staring at you with half closed eye lids and a blush on his face.

'How are you so freaking fine?'

---

You honestly did not know when you and the fae started getting so comfortable with each other, but are grateful for your friendship with Liliy.

---

The some of the buildings were set ablaze, others half torn apart, and human bounty hunters were tearing the town apart looking for Lilia Vanrouge. Rumours of the infamous general seeking refuge with someone spread far and wide, wide enough to reach the ears of the royal family. The bounty on his head was more than 9 million thaumarks, and bounty hunters were eager to find the fae.

'Fuck, fuck fuck fuck fuck' You screamed on your mind as you swiftly ran back to your home in the woods, running from the danger.

"LIliy!" You burst into your home, praying that your fae would still be there.

"Y/n." Liliy was dressed in the armour you found him in, with his gargoyle mask on this head, carrying his weapon. "I have something to tell you, beastie."

"That you're Lilia Vanrouge, I know." You're not stupid. You saw the bounty posters. Bro.

"Are you leaving..?" You silently said, eyes meeting his.

Lilia stepped closer, his voice now low and soft.

"I have to. If I don't I- You- my queen needs me, and it's too dangerous for me t-" You hug him, eyes watering. Lilia's arms gently embrace you, and he kisses your forehead. "I swear I'll be back, my love"

Tears fall down your face, as he slowly releases you and leaves, turning back for one last glance of you.

'Please come back'

--

Authors note

This one was a bit sad😭 maybe if i finish part 3 i can make some side stories with crack and stuff 😭🙏Would you like that ?🤔

(Also just comment if you want to be tagged if theres a next one)

(Tag list: @anonima-2)

[queers-gambit]

Bullet Train masterlist

requesting rules and masterlist

requests are OPEN where to watch: Netflix, Hulu, Disney+

Perpetual L's and Overwhelming Dubs

slutty stranger bathroom sex on a train.

word count: 3.7k+

🍒 author's favorite 🧸 mild fluff 🥰 romance 💦 smut 🔥 NSFW 🙊 general language warning

read here

part two:Shower Shenanigans

midnight callers turn your quiet night upside down, but at least it ends with you riding your stranger in the shower.

word count: 4.7k+

🙊 general language and content warning 💦 smut ❤️‍🩹 literal hurt and comfort (i guess?) 🥰 romance 😵‍💫 wonky brain goes wonky 🩸 depiction of injury and blood

read here

Love What You've Done with the Place

he's never been a man built for relationships, until you come into his life. now, the house feels like a home.

title citation: song by Rascal Flatts

word count: 1.8k+

🙊 general language warning 🔏 NOT edited 🧸 fluff 🥰 romance

read here

Blue Bunny

you and the Twins show up to collect the same debt.

word count: 4.4k+

🍒 author's favorite 💸 technically Mafia AU 💍 kinda established relationship 🥰 romance  🎭 drama 🎀 Daddy's Girl trope 🙊 general language and content warning 🥊 depiction of physical violence and / or aggression 🍑 character with given nickname [ Bunny ] 🩸 depiction of injury and blood ☠️ depiction of MINOR character deaths 🔫 handguns 💛 requires maturity and caution

read here

part two:My Date With the President's Daughter

your father finds out about Tangerine in the worst way during a charity gala before marauders try to rob it.

word count: 6.3k+

💸 Mafia AU 🎭 drama 💔 light angst 🥰 romance ❤️‍🩹 hurt and comfort 💦 limited, interrupted smut 🔥 NSFW 💍 established relationship 🎀 Daddy's Girl trope 🙊 general language and content warning ☠️ depiction of MINOR character death and other dead bodies 🥊 depiction of physical violence and / or aggression 🥂 alcohol consumption 🔏 barely edited ✝️ Lord's name in vain 🩸 depiction of injury and blood 🔫 guns 💛 requires maturity and caution

🚩 supposed to be 🍑 character with given nickname [ Bunny ] but Cherry NEEDS to make this edit officially

read here

Let the Bodies Hit the Floor

what happens when Tangerine's little lady is targeted in their home?

word count: 9.1k+

💸 technically Mafia AU 🎭 drama 💔 angst 🥰 romance ❤️‍🩹 hurt and comfort 🍒 author's favorite 🙊 general language and content warning 🐍 small small small toxic family 🥊 depiction of physical violence / aggression 🔏 not edited 🩸 depiction of blood 🔫 guns 💛 requires maturity and caution

read here

Menace

in essence, "drabble about Tangerine going to the bathroom and texting Reader 'come here'."

word count: 4.4k+

🧸 fluff 🥰 romance 💦 smut 🔥 NSFW 💍 established relationship 🙊 general language and content warning 🥂 alcohol consumption 🧠 discussion of mental health (anxiety) 🔫 handguns (it's Tangerine) 🥊 mild depiction of violence (again, it's Tan...) 🔏 barely edited

read here

Fine Line

going after the same silver briefcase, you and Tangerine exchange more than a few blows. pun intended.

word count: 5.2k+

🎭 drama 🥰 small romance 💦 smut 🔥 NSFW 🥀 enemies-to-lovers ⚠️ small spoilers 🙊 general language and content warning 🥊 depiction of physical violence and / or aggression 🍑 reader with given nickname [ Peach ] 🩸 depiction of injury and blood

read here

The Blood of the Covenant

being raised alongside the Twins, you naturally fell on path to become a contract killer - much to Tangerine's chagrin. when you're recruited onto the Bullet Train, too, emotions cum into play - get it?

word count: 9.1k+

⏳ AU timeline ⚠️ small spoilers, too 🧸 little fluff 🎭 little drama 🥰 romance 💦 poorly written smut 🔥 NSFW 🙊 general language and content warning ☠️ minor character death 🥊 depiction of physical violence / aggression 🔏 not edited ✝️ Lord's name in vain 🍑 character with given nickname / codename [ Olive ] 🩸 depiction of blood and injury

read here

All Mine

you and Tangerine break up, and the man you date after is a serious downgrade. on a night out, Tangerine decides your story isn't yet finished.

word count: 7k+

⏳ assumed AU timeline - Tangerine lives 💔 angst 🎭 drama 🥰 romance ❤️‍🩹 hurt and comfort 🔥 small NSFW (it's really mild, but better safe than sorry) 💣 relationship angst 😭 break-ups 💍 established relationship 🩶 morally grey!reader / mean!reader / cheater!reader 🚬 smoking indoors 🥊 brief domestic aggression and depiction of violence 🔏 not edited

read here

requesting rules and masterlist

[count-alucard-tepes]

Op hotties get a sudden call from this estranged S/O…😅

S/O: “I’m pregnant and you’re the father…”

Kizaru ✨: he is surprised by the whole situation but he is civil about it and doesn’t question his S/O. He asks them how they feel and when he could come over to see them so they could talk more about it in person. He definitely would be involved now that he knows he has a child on the way.

Akainu🌋: he immediately takes time off to go and see his S/O, he tried to tell them to come to him…but they’re stubborn. He wants to know how his S/O and their baby is doing.

Ryokugyu 🌱:

Fujitora 🐅: he is relived to hear from them and even happier to hear that they would now have a child. He immediately wants to be with them.

Sir Crocodile 🐊: he’s like ‘look what the cat dragged in…and are you sure it’s mine…’. He’s gonna be an ass about it and get a paternity test because he doesn’t trust anyone really. Once he knows the baby is his, he makes sure his S/O gets whatever they need but he’s not gonna be the supportive partner…however, he’d be the best dad ever.

Doflamingo Donquixote 🦩: he doesn’t question his S/O at all and asks them to come back to him. I mean no one is gonna openly lie to Doffy about something serious like this. He cannot wait to be a dad.

Benn Beckman 🔫: it’s a lot for him to take in at first but he immediately sets off to see his S/O so they can talk in person and he can be there for them. It takes him some time to accept that he’s gonna be a dad.

Katakuri Charlotte 🍡: he’s beyond excited but he contains himself and asks them to come home soon so that they could reunite.

Killer🔪: he choked up the moment he heard their voice and the mention of a baby made him even more excited. He always wanted to be a dad.

Kaido🐉: he’s the happiest he’s been in days and demands that they come home immediately. He wants to pamper them and love on them.

King 👑 : he is shocked by the news and only says, “…I’m on my way, angel”. He just wants to be with them and rekindle the love they’ve had. He’s excited to be dad.

Queen👑: he cannot stop crying because all his freedom is gone, he knows he needs to be there for them though.

Izou🔫🔫: he’s concerned about where they are and wants to be with them, he needs to know they’re okay. He’s beyond excited to have a baby with them.

Dragon D Monkey 🐉🐒:

Oven Charlotte 🍞: he’s so happy and demands that they come home so that they can be a family.

Buggy🤡: he’s literally is crying happy and concerned tears, he doesn’t know how to keep it together and begs his S/O to come back to him.

Marco the Phoenix 🦅: he’s beyond excited and immediately sets out to find them. He cannot believe he’s going to be a dad.

Eustass Kidd🤘🎸: the responsibility of it all slaps him in the face and he goes silent for the first time ever. It takes him a few days before he can contact his S/O to say he wants to be involved in his kid’s life.

Rosinantè Donquixote aka Cora-San💕: he literally is crying the moment he hears their voice and wants to know where they are so he can come and see them. He is so happy that he’s gonna be a dad.

Who’s-Who ❤️‍🔥👹: he’s arrogant at first but he knows his S/O isn’t lying to him and makes his way to see them and talk about what they plan next for them and the baby.

Gecko Moria🦇: he’s taken back by it all but after it settles in, he asks them to join him so that they could be a family.

Iceburg💜: he’s surprised as he didn’t think he’d be a dad but he’s happy anyway and invites his S/O back home with open arms.

Gild Tesoro⚜️🏅: he’s arrogant and wants to know if they only contacted him because they wanted his money. After getting cursed at and the line going dead, he starts to panic that he might not be able to see his child if he loses contact with his S/O so he tries to find them and apologizes for being a dick.

Rob Lucci🐆: he’s pissed off that his S/O contacted him after a while of not seeing each other but then sets off to see them. He wants to know if the child is his but deep down he knows it is.

Karasu🐦‍⬛: he immediately sets out to see his S/I as he wants to be there with them and take care of them.

Koby🦸💘: he’s already crying since he heard his S/O and when he heard he was gonna be a dad, he lost it and was sobbing on the floor. He’s just so happy.

Douglas Bullet🚅: he’s annoyed at first but then he hears that he’s gonna be a dad and beyond excited. He tracks his S/O down and automatically assumes they’re back together since they’re having a baby now.

[sockmeat]

Okay, hear me out

Total Drama fanfic where the reader is dating Mike and the alters (minus Chester) and it's really just the series + the reader

I haven't written anything like this so it'd definitely be a challenge... I think I'd probably replace a character or make her a surprise character (honestly, I might replace Anne Maria out of everyone simply because I don't want her near my man🔫)

Imagine all the cute scenes oh my god ??

Vito fronting and immediately looking for his babe aghagha

Mani holding onto her waist so she doesn't wander off and get hurt while in the caves AAAAA

Svetlana helping reader with challenges so she can show off ❤

MIKE BEING A SWEETHEART AND FREAKING OUT OVER HER KISSING HIM

Mal being a sour puss about not being able to love on the reader like everyone else can, so the second he is finally able to, he runs off to find her and will literally not keep his greedy paws off her. He tries to play it off as being Mike, but reader knows her baby well and he's never this assertive... Suspicious hmmmm

And no I will not be doing that "erasing the alters" bs I hate it SO MUCH. WHY IS THAT CANON

[trekmupf]

"We're all mad here" 🐇👸🔫🐯

Pro

The famous massage intro

Sulu and McCoy taking a lovely little walk together

Sulu is such a botany nerd; I love these small character moments

McCoy thinking he's loosing his last marbles

Spock literally thinking that humans go on shore leave to run up and down meadows like dogs

The way Kirk smiles when he thinks Bones is pranking him is lovely

Kirk's facial journey when he realizes McCoy and Spock played him

The first time Kirk calls McCoy Bones

The way the running is filmed and the way they run – and boy do they run in this episode

Sulu, gun enthusiast

The easy friendship between Kirk and McCoy- the way they joke and laugh with each other is so beautiful

McCoy is so beautiful in this episode, I could screenshot every second. He smiles so much and is so at ease, I mean

Continuing what we know from E3 Kirk wasn't the super cool Bro at the academy but actually the bookworm people bullied

Kirk saying that Ruth hasn't aged a day since they last were together ages ago, and the actress being the same age as Shatner when we see her... canon Kirk being into older woman okay.

McCoy rolled a natural 20 on charisma

me @ yeoman Borrows being super into McCoy's flirting: same girl same

Also I actually like that for once McCoy is the one having a little romance and getting to flirt / be desired, which is rare (because he's older and not the leading man; Tumblr, of course, disagrees)

every time the tiger is on screen I remember that Shatner literally wanted to fight it and it makes me laugh

fake character death trope! (also Bones is a beautiful corpse)

Spock like no offence lady, I'm to gay for this, Spock out

“Did you have fun guys?” “Yes we did Mr Spock” wink emoji implied, like you guys know it sounds like you had group sex right

the setting and scenery is beautiful and a nice change

the score underlines the whimsy and lightness of the episode

the premise is so silly but works well. I miss episodes like this on modern TV, just some downtime with no large scale danger, war or plot, just silly crew shenanigans that gives us more time to spend with our guys

sometimes Sci-fi has great special effects, and sometimes they just hold an antenna really close to the camera and call it a day and I love that

I'm Yeoman Borrows; Look at him being all happy

Con

McCoy's death has no lasting impact on anyone, it's just a short time plot device and then gets shelved for more adventure / silly time; Even though he does come back, I wish it wouldn't have been so trivialized here

weird wind chime sound effects of the planet

Finnegan as a character is super obnoxious and too over the top (which is saying something in the episode with Alice in wonderland)

especially the second confrontation takes ages, especially as we now have more pressing matters in the narrative

treatment of yeoman Borrows (We already know weird things are going on based on what McCoy saw, yet Kirk doesn't believe her and shows zero empathy towards her distress), also her main purpose is damsel in distress

Kirk is a bit slow to unravel the mystery and almost stupid at times? It might be excused by him using the opportunity to let go of his responsibility and being with Angela / letting out his anger with Finnegan

the amount of references and jumping between visions is too jumbled and all over the place, which is why the pacing is off. some bits are so short, they'd better be cut (Rodriguez side adventure) and some just go on (Finnegan)

Counter: Shirt rip Kirk

Quote: "You've got your problems, I've got mine. But he's got ours, plus his, plus 430 other people" - McCoy about Kirk Moment: Opening Scene, where Kirk thinks Spock is massaging him and being super uncomfortable when its a female crew member

Summary: Silly and light episode with no deeper meaning but some great character moments, funny scenes and further development of the interpersonal relationships

In another universe this is a classical painting

Previous Episode - Next Episode - All TOS Reviews

[flodaya]

My turn to threaten you 🔫 write that dissertation 🔫

okay okay i'm doing it

maybe i lied because now that i'm trying to put it into words it's just intelligible screeching in my head

okay but trying my best: when i first watched that moment on twitter not really expecting much because like okay whatever i love spidey i love Z so i'll causally follow press tours, right? but then this moment hit me like a truck because i've seen Z in interviews before but i've never seen THIS side of Z before, where was this completely unguarded woman coming from? like she was teasing and flirting with tom openly loudly PROUDLY right in front of running cameras?????? knowing full well it would go viral

and it's not just how very charged and flirty the thwip moment is but also how attentive tom is looking at her the entire time, and how when he realized she was flirting he got so giddy, like a little school boy who got his cursh's attention

and then the second half (that everyone keeps cutting off for no reason) of him literally having to completely reboot because this woman is driving him insane and how smug she looks, she knows EXACTLY what she's done, she knows she got him wrapped around her pinky finger, and after a second of recollection he shifts even closer to her pressign their shoulders together because "physical touch is my love language" SIR we know

[chiara-klara-claire]

funny idioms

My personal selection of idioms collected here and there. my posts - resources masterpost | aesthetic idioms | words with cute literal meaning

Icelandic 🇮🇸

Ég borga bara með reiðufé 🐑💰 - I only pay with an angry sheep: Okay, but I don't have to like it

að taka einhvern í bakaríið 🥯 - to take someone to the bakery: used as a threat, often in sports, when your adversary is about to experience a heavy defeat.

Finnish 🇫🇮 @finnish-sayings

kissanristiäiset 🐱 - a cat’s christening: an unimportant event or holiday

nakki ja muusi 🍲 - in the year sausage and mashed potatoes: long ago

Ilma on kuin linnunmaitoa 🥛🐦- The weather is like bird’s milk: The weather is wonderful.

Hänella ei ole kaikki muumit laksossa - he/she doesn’t have all the moomins in the valley: they’re crazy

Norwegian 🇳🇴 @hazel3017

Nappe seg i løken 🧅 - Yank the onion: a man who masturbates

Høy på pæra 🍐- High on pears: someone who is arrogant (head gets so big it looks like a pear)  

Det er helt Texas! : That’s completely Texas! That’s crazy!

Swedish 🇸🇪( @escapenorth-blog )

Den är paj 🥧 - It’s pie. “It doesn’t work.”

du är ute och cyklar! 🚲 - you’re out and riding your bike! “You don’t know what you’re talking about!”

Fårskalle 🐑 💀 - sheep skull ; hissen går inte gela vägen upp- the elevator doesn’t go all the way up: stupid

släng dig i väggen - throw yourself against a wall: take a hike 🌲

Danish 🇩🇰 @vikinglanguage

der er kommunister i lysthuset*- communists are in the funhouse: when someone has their period 🩸🏠

skide grønne grise 🐖 💩 - to shit green pigs: be extremely frightened 😰

gåsevin 🍷🦆– goose wine: Water

pølsetysker 🌭 🇩🇪 – sausage german: a very German German or just a way to call Germans you dislike

ikke helt appelsinfri* 🍊 - not entirely orange-free: drunk 🤠

at tale flydende svensk* 🗣🇸🇪 - to speak Swedish fluently / tale i den store hvide telefon**☎️- talk in the big white telefon / ringe til Ulrik** 📞 : to call Ulrik: to throw up 🤮

at skyde papegøjen 🦜🔫- to shoot the parrot: to have luck

Dutch 🇳🇱

Helaas Pindakaas 🥜 - too bad peanut butter (“peanut cheese”): too bad, which rhymes with pindakaas = 🇩🇪 Schade Marmelade: same as Dutch, but with jam

German 🇩🇪 this post by @for-the-love-of-wolves-studies and this @moami

einen Clown zum Frühstück essen/frühstücken 🤡 🍽️- eating a clown for breakfast: not behaving decently/having bad humor

bekannt wie ein bunter Hund 🐶 🌈 - known as a colorful dog: someone known all over town

fuchsteufelswild 🦊 - fox devil wild: super mad

einen Vogel haben 🐦 - to have a bird: to be crazy

Ich glaub mein Schwein pfeift 🐷 - I think my pig whistles: I think I’m dreaming  

die Gurkentruppe 🥒 - cucumber brigade: bunch of bunglers  

Durch den Kakao ziehen 🍫-  throw someone into chocolate: to make fun of somebody or something, to roast someone

die beleidigte Leberwurst spielen 🌭 - to play the offended liver sausage: being very resentful

Hans Wurst 🌭 - Hans Sausage: name to call a stupid person (both m/f)

jetzt haben wir den Salat 🥗 - now we have the salad: look at this disaster that we now have 

jemanden hinwünschen, wo der Pfeffer wächst 🧂 - wish somebody would be where pepper grows: to want somebody to be as far away as possible

nah am Wasser gebaut 💧- built close to the water: someone that is easily moved to tears

italian 🇮🇹

Cascare dal pero 🍐 🌳  - fall from the pear tree - find out about something when you were supposed to know it

Far venire il latte alle ginocchia 🥛- make milk come from one’s knees: being a pain/ annoying,

Andare a rane** 🐸 - go (as) frogs: something like online connection is lagging

fare la figura del cioccolataio 🍫 - make a chocolatier’s impression: to make a fool of yourself, be responsible for embarrassing cockups

Che pizza! 🍕 - What a pizza!: “Nuts!”/ used Wien you are bored or annoyed at something

Essere alla frutta 🍎 🍌 - to be at [the moment of] fruit: when the situation is very bad (meals usually end with eating fruit), to emphasize this some people might say al caffè, al dolce ☕️ 🍰(coffee, dessert time)

Un limone 🍋- a lemon: a make out session

French 🇫🇷 this

Chanter en yaourt - sing in yogurt: singing in gibberish, random sounds pretending to sing in [English]

Poser un lapin 🐇 - to put a rabbit: To stand someone up

Avoir le cafard 🪳 - to have the cockroach: To be depressed

Tomber dans les pommes 🍎🍏 - To fall in the apples: To faint

Donner sa langue au chat 👅 🐈- to give one’s tongue to the cat: I have no idea/I give up. used to say you don’t know about something and are unable to give an answer.

Polish 🇵🇱 @pol-ski this post

można z konie kraść 🐎- you can steal horses with him: a trustworthy person

co ma piernik do wiatracka - what does gingerbread have to do with a windmill: it’s irrelevant

*: apparently not used much but wanted to include them cause they’re hilarious; **: maybe regional/use limited to an area

Thanks for contributions: @dasloddl (de), @tetsunabouquet (nl)