#listening to come as u are bc ofc i am

[edwardsissyhandsthtdanceslikeabb]

Gothic direction & Harry Potter

⋆ ★

Something that really elevates The Series that Shall Not be Named for me is the romantic *(ethereal, evocative, immersive) quality which flourishes the things i most enjoy about it.

Namely Snape, and — as i've come to realize — also my probably tie-fav movie: The HBP (gof slaps fawk the haters).

★

i don't think many ppl would use the word gothic to describe HP, but the HBP is an inherent tragedy

─── · 。ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

It opens doing smth which is shameful that its special in, YA and all, and gives weight to the throughline of harry's trauma, fears, loss and anger, all encapsulated, and their subsequent fallout. and its atmospheric and personal and dark in an uncontrived way so many fail at.

then in swarm the death eaters

and that ornate, theatrical quality persists — from the flair of dumbledore's rings to the insurmountable mass of the dark mark. we are subsumed into hp anew through harry's deadened eyes, blanching flashes. and this remains present still in the sweeping landscapes and wholesale destruction ushered in by excess, theatricality and darkness epitomized: the death eaters.

its all visually and emotionally absorbing, with the movie itself looking like an oscillation between dream and nightmare — like something nearly euphoria-esque if it isn't also shot on film — and conveys tone enchantingly.

narcissa is triumph and relief, power and terror all in one and the poetic, nearly Shakespearean tone of the scene itself is immensely gothic

⋆ ★

the hbp maintains this undercurrent of darkness, later horror, throughout, maturing what had previously been motifs and threats, and before that amateur monstrosities or concepts, into the fabric of the storytelling itself

— its in draco's compensatory nastiness, in giving your flesh to congealing that of another, the angst, rivalries turning violent and bloody, and the existential threat expressly looming in hogwart's very walls. and sets a tone of brooding mystery as the trio spy on narcissa and draco, and one of emotional terror as snape doubles down with the death eaters.

an ultimately haunting, melancholic tone

the later installments navigate tonal extremes with a masterful fluidity, platforming teenage highs and inner conflict with contrasting and yet equal artfulness, but at the heart of it all is the fundamental disruption of canon, the sacrifice of a narrative titan — the final transmorphing of preconceptions which act as much as an existential threat to the core of our main as they do to the world around him. the martyring of dumbledore is inevitable and in that even more tragic, this nigh-omnipotent figure unflinchingly volunteering himself to fate — and its then that we question convention, grapple with forces bigger than archetype and main characters.

its in this uncertainty and betrayal that i think its best explained why im so invested in snape (and would argue he's the narrative heart but i digress). i've heard it claimed that the half blood prince reveal lacks impact bc it wasn't tied to a central mystery, but the reveal isn't an investigatory one, its entirely emotional.

snape is an inherently gothic character, but his story is also immensely romantic, in both senses.

he's dumbledore's closest ally, despite everything, he, as well as the audience through the first movie, have let our guards down, we've seen harry and snape empathise through legililemins, we've seen him tend to dumbledore's wounds, seen them confer over top secrets in the quiet cover of empty towers, we've seen him question dumbledore's objectification of harry through prioritising fate over his safety — and follow him despite that (we may have even seen the depth of his love for lilly or his patronus but i forgor), and even if snape is generally unpleasant, a character we had previously thought unshakeable trusted him, and harry needed dumbledore.

so when harry says that snape betrayed his trust, that dumbledore trusted him (and so he trusted him), i felt it, i felt harry's rage and hurt and floundering, i felt the depth of snape's betrayal, i joined harry in his ache for repentance, for morality, for something — a validation of their time spent, of the magnitude of trust and connection and life. to throw that all away lanced me just as severely as it did harry. to hold goodness and not have it be enough was smth basal and deep. it was epic, with snape revealing he had been a source of inspiration and betterment for harry, that harry had learned from him and equally used him to wound, that this half-blooded boy he had a tenuous empathy for could be someone so reprehensible — someone backdropped by screams and blazing fire and weaponizing his exceeding magical aptitude against harry, remorseless

that was cinema.

for dumbledore to welcome his death at snape's hands, to have almost preempted it and yet seeming unbetrayed.

for dumbledore and snape both to bear draco's cross and protect the innocence of a child, still pure, in over his head. to have dedicated themselves to the youth, to harry's destiny regardless of him knowing it or not, that is the epitome of gothic poetry to me.

so when the reveal comes, that dumbledore hadn't been mistaken, that someone couldn't so fundamentally and unflinchingly betray another, express humanity only as platitudes made cruel by their seeming earnestness. when snape too martyrs himself, and we see his earnestness, his emotion, his sincere love and loyalty, it shakes you with relief, it makes you believe, understand again, no longer so hardened, crumbling just as snape does, just as harry lets his resentments dissipate.

and so, a second act kickstarted by the perversion of canon is restored through snape's sincerity — the knowledge that the force most powerful is indeed love, and stolen youth and innocence allowed are life again, the central theme of heart cemented ultimately, by snape.

a reconciliation of the past and a gratitude for the future and all that was given to get there.

[munadyke]

ok. sometimes I just want to listen to people talk abt star wars but the youtube results are all men and I refuse to do that to myself. found myself on a reddit thread of good sw youtube accounts/podcasts and it's like....for one dollar name a woman:/

[pegasusdrawnchariots]

the eternal question: is scheduling w friends as an adult That Hard or am I just bad at it

[astrxealis]

mood rn is I'm Hungry! i don't want to do my work and i'm slowly feeling overwhelmed and very stressed but also i want to be productive! and i want yotsuyu to step on me (please)

[toastsnaffler]

ohhhhh my god girl i don't careeeee

[xythlia]

wannabe burglar set my house alarm off so now I'm just awake. at 3:30 in the fucking morning

[pupyuj]

[cw: threesome, overstimulation, voyeurism, exhibitionism (i guess?)]

YA’LLLL i swear i was gonna do jho for my first bini drabble after a while but then i thought about how aiahcey are kinda my danjangz but bini… and ya’ll know crazy i am about danjangz and the same is about to happen to aiahcey like HELLOOOO 😭😭😵‍💫🙏

pretty femme dom gfs save me… save me pretty femme dom gfs…

being the breath of fresh air they need amidst their messy idol life aka their pretty little doll who would willingly do anything for them 🫣 stacey calling you in the middle of the night to come over her house and ofc you're so eager to do just that bcs you're whipped as hell! omg she probably likes to fuck you in front of a mirror all the time.. all to see how embarrassed you look seeing yourself get stretched out and have your cunt abused by your friend like this :(( mapang-asar din minsan si staku so i like to think that she likes to taunt you while fucking you 😭 or even full on insult you just to add to the humiliation 😵‍💫😵‍💫 maybe she’d even record sometimes 🤭 laughing at your tears and whines but immediately cooing at you and kissing your face when you start sobbing—she just loves being annoying to you :((

and where do those videos end up?? right on her ate aiah's dms! i like to think na mahilig magpa-inggit si staku LMAOO saying smth like "look what ur missing out on, u workaholiccc 😝" and the video attached is you being a whiny mess with stacey instructing you to moan aiah's name in the background 😭 this ofc just makes aiah drive up to stacey's house in record time, which stacey loves sm bcs that's totally unlike the aiah she normally sees 🤭

in direct contrast to staku, aiah loves to plan out your meetings where it wouldn't be a convenience to either of you! but sometimes she gets needy and hasty too.. don't forget she's just as obsessed with you as stacey is so she definitely fucks you as soon as she has the opportunity to, she needs you!!

now listen.. pussy drunk aiah losing herself in between your legs while stacey whispers the nastiest shit in your ear as she massages your clit.. her even grabbing aiah's head and pushing her closer to your cunt just to get you to moan their names 😩😩 i'm a painslut!stacey believer so she would loveee to feel your nails digging into her skin or scratching her arm when she's doing too much 😭 even goes as far as to admire the marks you leave on her afterwards?? she's a lil freak what can i say!! and then there's your sweet ate aiah being a soft dom at heart 🥺 constantly looking up at you with worry in her eyes bcs she never wants to push you over the edge too much :(( their dynamic is kinda funny to me NOBODY GETS IT.

"staku.. i think she's had enough.. mh.."

"no, no, isa pa. she likes that, believe me. look at her! and look at you! gustong-gusto mo pa.."

aiah absolutely loves it when you make a mess all over her beautiful face! a little embarrassing for you but the satisfied look on her face makes it worth the trouble 🤭 and yk what's even hotter than watching aiah wipe her chin clean and suck your juices with her fingers?? watching stacey pull her close and kiss her, hearing her moan at how you tasted on aiah's tongue.. well, who wouldn't get wet again at the sight of that?! 😵‍💫

expect only the best and softest aftercare the coming morning! both of them are cuddling you and spoon-feeding you food while you all chill on stacey's couch watching teleseryes and movies 🥰🥰 probably until the two of them feel like fucking you all over again which usually only takes about the first thirty minutes of a movie.. 😛

[hxlda-hxlda]

thank u thank u @fiddleleafedfig for the tag !!

nine people you want to get to know better

last song: when i opened the tag, 'alien blues' by vundabar but currently i'm listening to hozier 'would that i'. as of finishing writing this, radiohead. there you have it.

favourite colour: a deep cherry red. the kind that would make a really lovely lipstick gloss.

last movie/tv show: i'm terrible with shows and movies, but i was watching the bowie doco (moonage daydream) the other day, keeping on brand ik. i also love british comedians so 'would i lie to you?' is probably up there as well.

sweet/savoury/spicy: sweet if it is really well done. i'm talking specifically that one pub down by where i live that for some reason makes the best chocolate lava cake ever. if not, savoury forever.

last thing i googled: beatles guitar songs for beginners. i've decided to relearn guitar and i'm back to the absolute basics.

current obsession: concerts! this is a long-standing love but it is very evident lately. the way concerts down here work is that no one comes for years bc of the trek to aus, and then randomly there's this one month period where everybody is here at once and suddenly i have to choose between favs. that has been this month! hard on the bank account but my soul is thriving with a concert every other week. saw noah kahan, it was life-altering.

last book: i'm between the '50 yrs of led zeppelin' biography by mick wall, and 'anna karenina' by tolstoy atm. (adding it) last fic: blends by rvltn909. finished it yesterday and oh my god. the crime that was me putting it off.

looking forward to: still a little ways away, but i'm moving to america for (my) winter-spring!! i've work in the states, which i'm thrilled abt. it also means i am tracking down artists who refuse to concert in aus (hozier for the love of god) and trying to sneak them in as well.

np tags (apologies if you've already been tagged): @fairylittlebitch @alltoounwellll @the-moon-says-hi @just--vi @whyistarchaser @bellaxisworld @feminist-cult-following @none-of-it-was-accidental @svnflowermoon + ofc anybody else who wants to. tag me. let me know you all.

[smoshyourheadin]

Maybe u could do a Spencer besties to lovers? Like they've known each other a long time yk

Thankssss no pressure if ur busy ofc <3

It’s Always Been You

cw: reader has a boyf who she breaks up w bc he’s an alchaholic!! don’t read if you aren’t comfortable, i’ll catch you another time ml 💛

a/n: EEK IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG THANK YOU FOR BEING PATIENT ANON 🫶🫶💛💛 also im taking this as smosh spence not cm spence so feel free to re-request if you’d like <33 ps, ive written that he listens to pink floyd here so thats who syd barrett is if you don’t know :))

requests r open!!

///

pairing: spencer agnew x fem!reader

florida, 2002

you and spencer were scurrying around in the freshly mown grass of his backyard, playing tag.

“you didn’t get me, you cheated!” you exclaim, ducking as he reaches out to get you again, tumbling to the floor.

“did too!” spencer retorts, his grazed knees dropping to the floor so he can lean over you. he meets your eyes, pulls a tongue, and hoists himself back up to run to his tyre swing.

all 11 years you’d known, you’d known them with spencer. your moms had been great friends since way before you were born, being in the same book club. or was it an art night? you didn’t exactly know, but you did know that because your moms were best friends, so were you and spencer.

as you sprung back up to your feet, your moms watched your antics through the kitchen window.

“whoever can swing the other the highest gets to have the last red popsicle!” he yelled as you ran over

“oh you’re so on!”

your hands gripped the tyre and you pushed like your life depended on it.

“y’know,” your mom said “one day, they’re going to end up together.”

his mom looked over at yours and smiled,

“i’d be surprised if they didnt honestly.”

los angeles, 2024

you walk through the door of your apartment, and you kick the door closed behind you. your bag slides off your shoulder, and you throw your keys onto the dresser next to the door. you only manage a long groan before flopping onto the couch.

“heya, charlie!” you scrunch your face up as you feel your dog’s cold, wet nose press against your cheek, as he gently wags his tail

“i missed you too boy, work was so tiring today.” you work at smosh with spencer, and have done for the past seven years after you left your job at another channel to join him. it was basically the best decision you’d ever made, every day filled with laughs; practically just a 24/7 hangout. you work with spencer on smosh games, but rarely ever go on camera, even if spencer’s there. you enjoy it anyway though.

you sit up and scratch behind his ears. he wiggles his body contently at your fondness. and then your stomach growls. it made sense, it was currently 6:43pm, and you last ate at noon, so you get up and drag yourself to make some mac n cheese.

as the pasta boils your phone starts ringing.

it’s james.

rubbing your hands over your face, you answer the dreaded call from your boyfriend james.

“heyyy~ sweetheart, y’doin okay? you were hic bein’ a bit of a bitch today, didnt answer my calls, what, you hate me or sumn?” he rambles, most of his words just slurring off.

“james, are you drinking again?” your voice is agitated, hearing the chattering and the low bass of a bar in the background.

you know he has a problem, and you’ve tried to get him to stop so many times. but you just can’t. he just won’t take your help.

“wha- i mean- well- no- but um- well y’r just gonna be mad at me like y’allways are” he stammers, not wanting to tell you the truth.

“no, i’m done with this. you say all this to me when you’re drunk, and then act like everything is fine! i’m sick of it! you spend so much time at the bar, and its the only place we ever go on dates, and i just end up babysitting you! so yeah i am mad! but for the last time! fuck you james.”

you hang up.

you start to tear up, the knot in your chest tight as your emotions come rushing to you, face heating up as tears begin to fall. the hissing of something behind you snaps you out of it.

“shit!” you rush over to to your stove, where the water from your pasta spills over the sides, the flames licking at the bottom of the pan.you take it off the heat and turn it off. it looks done anyway. you add some butter, and, of course, cheese. stirring gently, you sob.

james was so nice to you, always showering you with gifts and praise and love. but it was all for nothing. he just didn’t love you like he loved drinking in the end.

pouring the mac n cheese into a bowl, you call spencer.

“hey lemon! how’s my favourite person this fine evening?” you smile at the nickname.

florida, 2007

“spencer, you’re a boy. why are you so complicated? i mean, its just annoying!” you walk into his bedroom after his mom let you in, clearly pissed off. being 16 isn’t fun, especially when boys you like are rude to you.

“what did he do?” spencer doesn’t look up from his computer, just slightly turn his head.

“he said that i must eat lemons because of how bitter i am. i mean come on!” you lie on his bed and watch him play runescape.

“lemon… hmph” he just smiles and continues whatever he was doing on his game.

“what? nothing to say? ugh! you suuuuuck!”

los angeles, 2024

“yeah, i mean, no. i broke up with james.” you sniffle, and eat a forkfull of your food, elbows resting on the cold marble of the kitchen island.

“i mean- um- yeah thats horrible…” he says

“you’re allowed to celebrate, i know you hated him. and so did everyone. but still. im fragile right now!” you giggle through your gentle tears

“well, i mean, honestly? glad he’s gone. he sucked dude. not sure why you didn’t do it sooner. well, one positive to come of this, your pillows won’t stink of beer next time i nap at yours!” he replies, clearly happy for you.

“yeah,” you chuckle at the memory of spencer falling asleep on your bed, then completing his hair smelt like budweiser “that is true.”

“all seriousness though, are you okay?” his voice is genuine this time, filled with concern.

“no, not really. it’s just… different i guess. but, not much has changed y’know? like, it already felt like he wasn’t my boyfriend anymore…” you begin to ramble for at least 20 minutes, only to be met with the occasional ‘mhmn’ and ‘yeah’ from spencer. mid sentence, there’s a knock at your door.

“oh one sec, someone’s here.” you get up from your table and swing the door open to see a very sympathetic looking spencer, two target bags in his hands.

your jaw is on the floor. you were just crying to him over the phone, and he’d stayed whilst going out to get what you can only assume is things like sour patch kids and vanilla ice cream, which you could see at the top of the bag. your favourites.

“girls night?” he smirked and raised the bags at his sides.

all you can do is smile ear to ear, and wrap him in a tight hug. he leaned into you, basking in your sweet citrusy perfume.

“you’re my favourite, spencie.” you say into his shoulder.

as you both walk inside, charlie comes bounding over to spencer, his favourite person.

“who’s a good boy! charlie is!” spencer was now crouchedby your kitchen island, fussing over your dog as you walked to put on something more comfortable. you slid on some track pants and an old atari hoodie. walking back into your kitchen, spencer has unpacked the bags, and is creating his favourite conconction, The Agnew Sundae. basically the most sickeningly sweet ice cream ever. his dad made it for you both in the summer, and it consisted of:

vanilla ice cream

chocolate syrup

caramel sauce

whipped cream

sprinkles

mini marshmallows

chocolate chips

m&ms

and some crushed oreos to finish.

god, you know you’re going to regret this later, but boy was it a good way to cheer you up.

also strewn on the counter was his switch and copy of animal crossing, a few of his dvd’s for you to watch, and his mom’s chocolate chip cookies.

“spencer, how on earth did you get these? your mom lives across the country!” you hold up the baggie, and raise an eyebrow.

he looks up from his ice cream assembly station, and smirks.

“a magician never- ow!”

you cut him off by lightly jabbing his arm

“okay okay, she visited not to long ago - when she took you to the mall? and she gave me these to freeze and keep for an important event. i think she’d agree this is important.” you cant help but smile at his remark. you missed you moms.

“i’ll have to ring her later to thank her.” you say.

the night goes on, and you and spencer sit on the couch under a blanket watching barbie princess charm school. because what else are you going to watch?

as the movie goes on, and the effects of the agnew sundae kick in; you were dozing off on his shoulder. towards the end of the movie, so does he. he drifts off, comforted by your soft hair occasionally brushing against his face.

you stir awake, the sun beaming into your eyes through your semi-open blinds, and you’re hit by a wave of memory. everything that happened last night comes flooding back.

james’ call.

spencer’s call.

spencer showing up for you.

at the latter, you smile slightly. you prop yourself up on the sofa, and notice the absence of spencer’s warmth by you. frowning slightly, you walk into the kitchen.

“morning sleepyhead” his sweet voice rings through the room

“hey. i thought you’d’ve gone home”

“no, im not that mean! who do you take me for?” he retorts, his attention turning back to the pancakes on the stove.

“pancakes? what time is it?” you come up behind him, putting your chin on his shoulder.

“yeah, and it’s about 10:30.” he leant his head on yours, flipping one. you had to admit, they look pretty good.

“10:30!?” you lift you head in surprise, looking at your phone “shouldn’t we be in work?”

“nope, i called us in sick. said my mom was having surgery. which she is, but i made it sound dramatic so we could stay off.” he looks at you, and smiles slightly.

“well, send her my love! i think i’ll go get dressed now.” he hummed, and you left the room.

opening your closet, you pick out a yellow baggy t-shirt and some grey sweatpants. you pull on some fluffy socks, and slip on a zip up hoodie. walking back out into the living room, spencer walks in with two plates piled high with pancakes, drenched in syrup and strawberries

“so,” you say, a fork full of pancakes in your mouth. “whats the plan for today?”

he looks over at you, and shrugs slightly. “not sure, we could go to the book store you like?”

“ah, you know the way to a girl’s heart“ you put a hand over your chest and giggle a bit.

a few hours later, you walk into the store, door creaking just a bit as a small brass bell chimes overhead. the air is filled with a comforting mix of old paper, leather bindings, and a hint of freshly brewed coffee from the corner cafe that you and spencer like to get tea from. you breathe it in deeply, a sense of calm washing over you. as you walk over the creaky wooden floorboards beneath you, soft warm light filters down from antique lamps, and cast a gentle glow over the rows of books. you ghost your fingertips over the cloth spines while the quiet murmur of whispered conversations and the occasional rustling of pages create a soothing background noise, almost like a lullaby. through spencer’s airpods, syd barrett serenades you both, and his voice blends seamlessly with the ambiance of the store.

“anything good today lemon?” spencer says as he shimmies up next to you in the aisle of towering book shelves, his voice like honey rolling off his tongue. his hair was unruly as always, but he looked so pretty in this light. his face was littered with freckles that you wish you could kiss. he’s smiling at you, and it snaps you back to reality, and reminds you of the fact you’re staring at him

“uh, yeah, i think i’ll get this one” you smile back, holding up a copy of memoirs of a geisha by arthur golden

“cool, shayne likes that one i think. but he likes every book so…” he smiles at his own remark “um, you want me to grab our normal seats in the cafe while you pay for that?”

“yes, please!” you reply eagerly, smiling as he walked off.

you walk up to the cashier, an older lady who always gives you a bookmark.

“thank you m’darlin’, have a lovely day!”

“you too mrs bryson!” you reply, heading over to spencer who’s sat in some plush leather armchairs. as you sit in comfortable silence with him, time seems to slow down, and for a moment, it's just you, spencer, the books, and the comforting atmosphere of this charming bookstore.

“i got you your sweet tea.” he says, handing you a plastic cup filled with your favourite tea.

he remembered.

fuck.

you were in love with spencer agnew, and it took you him handing you your favourite tea to realise it.

“thanks spence.” you say, still grasping the feelings in your chest.

while you read you book and drink your tea, you feel your attention drifting to him. you can't help but glance up from the pages every now and then, watching him as he sits across from you, his focus on his own book. his fingers absently tracing the rim of his coffee mug, his brow furrowing as he reads. the way the sunlight filters through the small window, casting a warm glow across his hair, highlighting the subtle streaks of lighter brown among his dark curls. you find yourself smiling at the sight of him, wondering when these small, mundane moments began to mean so much to you. the bookstore is quiet, aside for the murmur of others reading or talking in hushed tones. yet, with spencer sitting just a few feet away, the world feels like it's faded to the background. it's just you and him, sharing this space, this moment. you watch the way his lips move slightly as he reads, how he occasionally tilts his head in concentration, and the way his eyes light up when he finds something particularly interesting. as he looks up and catches you watching him, you feel a rush of warmth spreading through your chest. he smiles at you, a slow, easy smile that makes your heart skip a beat. he raises an eyebrow, and you quickly look back down at your book, feeling your cheeks flush. but you can't help it; your gaze finds its way back to him, like he's the most interesting story in the room. he seems to notice the shift in the air between you. he closes his book and leans forward slightly, his elbows resting on his knees.

“everything okay?” he asks, his voice gentle, his eyes filled with genuine curiosity.

“yeah,” you reply, trying to sound casual, though your heart is racing. “just... glad to be here with you.”

he nods, his smile growing a bit wider. “me too.”

as he settles back into his chair, you realize that this simple exchange has changed something. the air feels lighter, the connection between you stronger. you may have come here to read and relax, but now, sitting across from spencer, you know you've found something else entirely - something you never want to let go of.

as you leave the store, you’re panicking slightly as you realise you don’t know what to do. so instead you make up an excuse.

“i forgot my keys ," you blurt out, looking back at the bookstore. it's a thin excuse, but spencer doesn't seem to notice. he simply nods, a hint of concern in his eyes.

"do you want me to wait for you?" he asks, already reaching for his phone to check the time.

"no, it's fine," you reply quickly. "you can go ahead. i’ll just be a minute."

spencer seems reluctant to leave, but he nods, offering a warm smile before stepping out onto the street. you watch him walk away, his figure blending into the crowd as he heads toward the main crossing. your heart sinks a little as he disappears from view, and you take a deep breath, trying to steady your racing pulse.

the bookstore feels different now. the warm glow and soft murmurs are still there, but without spencer, it's like the color has faded a bit. you stand by the door, uncertain of what to do next. you could go back outside, catch up with him, and just say it. tell him how you feel. but the words seem stuck in your throat, and the thought of laying your feelings bare feels like too much, too soon.

you step back inside, pretending to look for something you might have left behind. the stacks of books seem to stretch endlessly in front of you, a maze of comforting distractions. you wander through the aisles, hoping to calm your racing thoughts, but all you can think about is spencer - his smile, the way his eyes crinkle when he laughs, the warmth of his voice.

eventually, you find a quiet corner and sit down, closing your eyes for a moment. you know you have to do something. you can't just let him walk away without knowing how much he means to you. but the fear of rejection, of changing everything, feels overwhelming.

you realize you need time to sort through your feelings, to figure out the best way to approach this. with a heavy heart, you decide to make your way home, hoping the familiar surroundings will bring clarity. as you step out onto the street, the cool breeze brushes against your skin, and you take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm of emotions raging inside you.

on the journey home, you replay the moments with spencer in your mind, each one a bittersweet reminder of how much he means to you. you know you can't keep hiding your feelings, but you also know you need to approach this with caution. as you unlock the door to your apartment, you make a silent promise to yourself—to take the time you need, to listen to your heart, and to find the courage to follow where it leads, even if it means risking everything for him.

when you get home, spencer tries calling you as he paces around his bedroom, his phone pressed against his ear. the ringing continues, but there's no answer. he frowns, feeling an uneasy twist in his stomach. maybe you're still in the bookstore. maybe your phone is on silent, or maybe you're just busy. he tells himself there's a reasonable explanation, but the doubt lingers.

as he walks to his kitchen, he dials again. this time, the call goes straight to voicemail. his instincts tell him something isn't right. the keys excuse felt odd, and your hurried departure only amplifies his worry. he takes a moment to think, then leaves his apartment, jumps in his car, starts the engine, and drives toward your apartment.

the streets pass in a blur as he navigates through the evening traffic, his mind racing with possibilities. he finds a parking spot near your building and heads to your door. the hallway is quiet, save for the distant sound of a tv from a neighbouring apartment. he takes a deep breath and knocks.

nothing.

he knocks again, this time a little louder. the knot in his stomach tightens. what if something's wrong? what if he's too late? he knocks a third time, and this time, he hears a faint rustling from inside. the door opens slowly, and there you are, standing in the doorway with a look of surprise and confusion.

"spence?" you say, blinking at him as if he's the last person you expected to see.

"i - i was worried," he stammers, rubbing the back of his neck. "you didn't answer your phone, and i - i didn't know if you were okay."

you tilt your head, trying to process why he's here. his eyes search yours, and you can tell he's anxious, almost desperate to explain himself. "i'm fine," you say, "just had some stuff to think about."

he nods, but you can see he's not entirely convinced. there's something else, something deeper. he takes a step back, as if he's about to leave, but then he hesitates. "i - i have to tell you something," he blurts out, his words coming out in a rush. "i like you. like a lot. like i think i love you? and i know it might be weird, and i don't want to mess things up, but I just had to say it - because i couldn't keep it to myself anymore.”

he looks at you, his eyes full of emotions you can't quite decipher yet. you nod, urging him to continue, even though your own heart is racing. there's something in his gaze that makes you realize this isn't just any confession - this is something that's been building for a long time.

"i've liked you since we were kids," he says, almost breathlessly. "i mean, you were always the coolest person I knew. you didn't care what anyone else thought. you were smart and funny and just... so genuinely kind. i remember when we used to ride our bikes around the neighbourhood, and you'd always be the first one to try something new. like, remember when you climbed that huge tree in mr lawson's yard just because you wanted to see the view from the top? i thought you were so brave."

he chuckles softly, his gaze softening as he reminisces. "and then, when we got older, you were always there for me. when my parents split up, and i felt like everything was falling apart, you were the one who came over with a pizza and just listened. you didn't try to fix it; you just let me talk. that's something i've always loved about you. you're a great listener, and you care about people. like, really care."

he shifts his weight from one foot to the other, his eyes locking with yours. "it's not just that, though. It's the little things, too. the way you laugh at the dumbest of angela’s jokes, the way you get excited about your favorite books, and how you always know the right thing to say when I'm feeling down. you make everything feel... lighter, you know? like, even when things are tough, you find a way to make it better."

spencer pauses, his voice growing more earnest. "so yeah, i've um, been holding onto this for a while, and i just, couldn't keep pretending that i didn't feel this way. i like you - a lot. and i don't know if you feel the same way, but i just couldn't not tell you anymore."

he takes a step back, the tension in his shoulders indicating that he's prepared to leave if needed. "i don't want to make things weird between us. if you don't feel the same, that's okay. i just had to say it, because you're the best thing in my life, and i can't keep acting like you aren't."

his confession takes you by surprise, but as he speaks, you feel a surge of warmth in your chest. the words you were struggling to say are suddenly so clear, so obvious. you watch as he starts to turn away, his shoulders slumping in resignation. before he can take another step, you grab his arm and pull him back, your lips pressing against his in a gentle, yet desperate kiss.

he freezes for a moment, stunned by your sudden action, then his arms wrap around you, pulling you close. when you finally break the kiss, you look into his eyes, and there's no doubt, no hesitation.

"it's always been you," you whisper, your voice soft but sure. "you're my person, spencer."

he hugs you tightly, his grip firm and comforting, as if he's afraid you'll disappear if he lets go. you rest your head on his shoulder, feeling the steady beat of his heart against your cheek. it's a perfect moment, one that feels like the beginning of something new, something beautiful.

and as you stand there in each other's embrace, you know that everything's going to be okay, because you have each other. and that's all that matters.

[plutonian-moon]

☆° persona charts observations ! ☆°

take what resonates leave what doesn't ! ☆° yes i come back after a long time of not posting anything <3 i was just having a very hard time with my mental health and physical health but i am kinda doing better so yeah ! :D

mercury in venus persona chart can show u how u r expressing ur love by using words etc its can also indicate if u have issues w/ expressing love verbally, some examples ☆° :

mercury Rx / mercury-saturn (hard aspects) : can indicate that u have some issues showing love verbally ☆°

scorpio mercury / 8H mercury : u can like having deep conversations with ur loved ones and u can expressing ur love very deeply & sometimes obssesive tbh ☆°

pisces mercury / 12H mercury / gemini mercury / 3H mercury : u can expressing ur love by writing love letters etc just words of affirmations can be important love language here

asc + 1H planets in venus persona chart can show u what type of beauty u have for example ☆° :

scorpio rising / 1H pluto : magnetic, dark beauty maybe u look good with red & black color vampire vibes fr ☆

virgo rising / 1H mercury : earthy, youngtful beauty, u can look pretty with brown & forest green colors ! ☆

leo rising / 1H sun : first of all u can getting many compliments bc of ur hair they can be very good looking, u can have this very glowing and shining aura, u can look so fine with gold, yellow, orange colors ☆

moon in venus persona chart is what u need emotionally in relationships ☆° :

virgo moon / 6H moon : acts of service can be important for u, u can like when someone does small things for u ! ☆

pisces moon / 12H moon : DEEP CONNECTION!!, u want someone who is emphatic, helpful and who will listen to u when u need it ☆

gemini moon / 3H moon : def words of affirmations can be somethig u want, u need someone who is good at communicating bc dry texters can makes u feel unwanted etc, u need someone who likes to joke and is matching ur vibe ☆°

mercury in mars persona chart can show u how u expressing ur angry verbally/by using words, some examples :

pisces mercury / 12H mercury / cancer mercury / 4H mercury : yall tend to be more on the passive agressive side tbh, probably will also stay silent with 12H mercury its can indicate that u will most likely hide ur thoughts durning argument hm

aries mercury / 1H mercury / leo mercury / 5H mercury / gemini mercury / 3H mercury : will be the ones who are more argumentive and confident durning arguments tbh.. can say alot of things that will hurt peoples even without realizing that lol

nemesis (123) is asteroid that talks about enemies looking at nemesis persona chart is very interesting esp take a look at the 12th house (hidden enemies), 7th house (open enemies) and ascendent\1st house planets + ofc ur nemesis zodiac sign, house, aspects and degree all of this can tell u about ur types of enemies that u have , example in ur nemesis persona chart :

7H cancer \ 7H moon \ 7H neptune \ 7H pisces \ 1H moon \ 1H neptune \ pisces rising \ cancer rising : open enemies that can be very passive agressive, can have victim complex and use gashliting alot, when u have 7H neptune \ pisces rising probably their actions that they do are confusing for u for example someone can one day be ur enemie and acts that they hate u annd the text day love bombing u (since neptune is planet of confusion)

webb (3041) persona chart will tell u how others see u on internet esp take a look at ascendent \ 1st house planets \ ruler of 1st house

chance of 12H moon \ 7H ruler in 12H person in venus persona chart of telling u that they have a feelings\crushing on u are very small😭 they are good at hiding feelings for someone, can be very scared of rejection thats why they will not tell u abt it

saturn 1H \ 7H saturn \ venus-saturn (hard aspects) in venus persona chart indicate a hard lesson in love in this life time, probably many karmic relationships, in love can be very awkward, saturn 1H and venus-saturn (hard aspects) even asc-saturn (hard aspects) indicate that u dont know how to take compliments, possible low self esteem, in general very beautiful but insecure peoples

[redr0sewrites]

Hi, I love your works! Can you write a hazbin hotel Lucifer x gn punk reader? Like, they dress punk, listen to punk music and are pretty rebellious anarchists? Tysm

YESSSS OFC!!!! also random rose lore but i am such a big green day fan and my mom once went to a green day concert and she talks ab it all the time-

🥀Cw: fluff, Lucifer being a sweetie

🥀HCs:

Lucifer was probably a little confused about your style and ideals when he first met you

he would ask you soooooo many questions about your outfits

hes a little awkward, but he means well 😭

he definitely asked you for music recommendations because you seemed really interested and invested in your style of music

when you started talking all excitedly about your favorite bands and music taste, Lucifer found himself enraptured by your love for the things you enjoy

Lucifer admires your individuality and how you stay true to the things you enjoy, and he also loves your spunky attitude

deep down, he despises heaven and authority figures as much as anyone else and he thinks its hilarious that the two of you are dating

an anarchist and the literal king of hell

once u start recommending your music to him, hes hooked

suddenly every rock or punk song he listens to reminds him of you, and he adores it

i think he'd really enjoy green day, maybe x ray spex too, but he'll ultimately listen to anything u want him too

lucifer ADORES your style too

if you wear studded patch jackets, vests, etc he DEFINITELY designs patches and studs for you

he would give u a little duck or apple pin to put on your jacket!!!

lucifer will help you out with your hair too, he loves detangling it at the end of the day and washing all of the hair spray and spiky styling out

would def help you dye it fun colors too

i mentioned this in my goth hcs, but if you wear a lot of jewelry he loves to fiddle and fidget with it while he's bored

like he'll just be standing next to you and all of a sudden he's playing with the chain necklaces you're wearing or poking the spikes and studs on your jacket just bc he's bored

overall, he's super supportive and sweet

"are you ready, duckling?" Lucifer called, waiting for you to finish getting ready. he had decided to take you out on a date tonight- not to a fancy establishment, no, but to a more hell-born central part of the pentagram to visit some knock-off theme park you'd mentioned weeks ago called LooLoo Land. the both of you thought that the obvious copyright of Lu Lu World was hilarious, and what better place to go on a date than a shitty theme park?

"I'm coming Luci, give me a sec!" you shout, "i'm just finishing up with my accessories". Lucifer hums in response, soon bursting into giggles as you come hurdling down the stairs, tackling him in a hug. you both pulled away after a few seconds, and Lucifer stepped back to admire your outfit. "Is it just me, or have you gotten spikier?" Lucifer chuckled, poking a stud on your jacket as you roll your eyes. "C'mon you, we have to go!" you smile, dragging him out the door as he admired your determined expression. "driving or teleporting?" you ask, and Lucifer shrugs. "you're no help," you grumble, but take his hand. "let's teleport, it'll be quicker." with a smile, Lucifer opens a portal. "Whatever you wish, dear ~"

RAHHHHHH💯💯💯 this one required a bit of research cuz idk as much ab punk culture/music as ik ab goth stuff, but it was still sm fun to write!!!!!

[satoruzlove]

- attractive things he does

suna rin , atsumu miya , kuroo tetsurou , sakusa kiyoomi

! the word d3ath, boys inlove, gn reader !

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

≈suna rin

•he talks about you extremely often

god bless anyone who asks ab u when u n rin r together,, holy shit. rin notices a lot of things about u, and even the tiniest , littlest details about u are so precious to him. u stick ur tongue out when ur focused? noted . ur good with kids? he’s absolutely inlove with u and thinking of u when he plays with or sees a child at one of his games. the boys will ask him yk, how’s yn, and all of a sudden they’re stuck for 1/2 hrs listening to tim talk about u.

“oh yeah how’s yn? it’s been a while”

“atsumu -”

*cracks knuckles*“ i am so glad you asked.”

he literally cannot help it , he doesn’t even realise that he’s talking sm bcus he just has so much to say about u? everything u do is just precious so now the guys just know not to ask or they’ll be screwed , lmao

•always makes eye contact when talking / loves eye contact

it lets him show u that he’s listening , since he’s not a huge talker . he doesn’t want u to think he’s bored of u speaking , or what ur saying , so he’s always, ALWAYS looking you in ur eyes when you talk. he does expect the same from u, ofc. if he’s talking and he catches u looking down he’ll stop, and when u ask why he’ll just flatly say ,” you weren’t looking so i assumed you stopped listening😐 ” and you just look at him like 😦 because it was only for like FIVE seconds .he truly doesn’t care what ur doing , he wants u to look at him when he’s talking - if you give him the eyes he will start stuttering 😔his gaze is always half - lidded, lazy almost, but it makes you feel like he’s seeing right into you. sometimes he’ll raise his eyebrows or scrunch them- but his main thing is eye contact.

•doesn’t treat you like everyone else

we all know rin is emo ☹️,so he does tend to give people the cold shoulder a lot . but u? never. if he’s stone walling his friends and you come up to him, he’s all smiles and ‘ hi, baby’ s . you just make him so so so happy. he’ll never call u annoying even as a joke like with his friends or act aloof- he expresses himself as much as he wants with u bcs ur his favorite </3 even his sister was so shocked when she over heard- y’all talking cus hes never that sweet to ANYONE. he’ll be clingy, he hugs u as soon as he sees u ( atsumu asked for a hug and rin flipped him off 😔😔😔✊), he wants u to know how much he loves u 24/7 cus you fr are special to him.

≈atsumu miya

•tucks your hair behind your ear/ brushes it out of your face

tsumu listens to u very tentatively when u talk, like he’s memorising everything that ur saying - the way ur saying it- what he’s feeling as u say it. he genuinely does wanna keep every moment with u tucked into his brain, so that when he’s lying awake at night thinking of u, he can day dream about u. when you glance up at him, chirping happily about your life to him, he can’t help but hesitantly move a large hand to your face and move away any hair in your face. his eyes flit away only for a moment- he’s still looking at you- just at a different part. he’ll blush a little when he does it for the first time , mumbling a ,” sorry, it was in your eyes.looked like it was botherin’ you.” truthfully,he wants to see your face properly, especially if you have bangs or something, tsum is moving it so he can see the way your eyebrows shoot up in excitement or knit together in frustration. he drinks in your expression, the story, everything in that moment he captures like a polaroid bc he just loves you so so much.

•doesn’t hold your entire hand- just a few fingers

because tsumu is tall it is kinda hard to lose him in a crowd. he will NEVER STOP using that excuse when it comes to holding onto u tho. he loves how your hands feel in his, the squish of your fingers, the way your fingers curl around his entire hand ( or attempt to. cus he’s so bloody large for absolutely no reason) without a thought. if your hands r smaller, he finds it so precious how your tiny little fingers are kinda just like , SWALLOWED by his hands . he thinks it’s so cute. if your hands are bigger/ the same size - it just makes him feel like a little kid to be holding a couple of ur fingers . bonus points if u run ur free thumb over his knuckles , he’s internally dying

•IS SO GOOD WITH KIDS AAA

if you have little kids in ur family they adore tsumu bcus he knows just how to entertain them lol. if he randomly gets tagged while theyre playing tag you best believe he’s SPRINTING. if they’re playing sally in the saucer , he WILL be sally and he absolutely will cheat and choose whoever he wants to be sally. secretly likes playing with nerf guns and is rly dramatic if he gets shot😔 he’ll fall on the floor and hold his ‘wound’ and choke out “ tell ,,, tell my yn,,,,, that i love them,,,,” “uncle tsumu it was a foam bullet🧍🏽” “shhhh hush yer trap” LMAOO he’s rly good with kids . also is amazing at calming down babies when they cry, like he’ll cradle them and make the most stupid noises, nuzzle them and all of a sudden they’re the happiest child alive.

≈kuroo tetsurou

•quips back at sarcasm

if there is no banter, tetsu doesn’t want it. keep ur relationship ✊😔. he literally adores the attitude, if he’s bullying you and you bully him back he’s already SMITTEN CUS WDYM ‘ you would be short too, if you weren’t made up of 90% bed head’ ?? WDYM BRUH THATS SO???🤭 if you tell him to stfu he’ll start giggling he’s literally insane. tetsu cannot help the goofy grin on his face when you don’t even hesitate to hand his attitude right back to him 10x worse, because it feels like you’re just his best friend having fun with him. it also shows him that y’all are similar and can relate to eachother, he rly eats it up. he’ll start pulling out scientific facts to cover up that he’s losing lmao💀

•knows you like the back of his hand

kuroo can read u like an open book, u can hide NOTHING from him. if ur upset he knows , if ur sad he knows, he knows when ur lying. you often times don’t even need to tell him if ur feeling uncomfortable or sad bcus he can just tell and will do anything to fix it. he understands ppl really well without them having to say much, he’s very perceptive. you being his partner means that he can do a lot more than just tell when you need some comfort- but he also knows exactly what you need to hear. so if ur upset, and if you’re comfortable, he’ll settle you down and ask what’s up. he’ll listen, comfort you and then tackle the problem. he is also ready to throw hands if someone’s upset you

•is a lovesick idiot with zero shame

when kuroo likes you, he likes you💀 the whole world, their mothers, their fathers and their sisters know about it , because of the way he acts around you. his face will contort into a sappy grin accompanied by dreamy eyes whenever you’re in the room, he’s always a lot more bright when you’re around, and suddenly when you’re around, everything is funny. even in a room of people he knows, you still get his undivided attention even if you aren’t speaking. everyone knows just how much he cares for you, and the best part is that he doesn’t even express anything verbally, it’s his actions that showcase the pit of admiration he holds for you deep in his heart . kenma’s heard everything about you atp, his grandma is SICK of hearing “ today yn and i-,” ,” nana you wont believe what happened with yn today-!” ,” nana, yn said i looked handsome today, can you believe it?”,” yn laughed at a joke i made today, they’re so smart, it was literally a college level chemistry joke and- HEY DONT ROLL YOUR EYES AT ME NANA”she’s EXHAUSTED 💀

≈sakusa kiyoomi

•pulls his mask down real quick to kiss you

as much as kiyoomi is stoic, it’s just because he isn’t super comfortable around a lot of people and he HATES anything socialising. it makes him feel icky, like everyone is watching him and it’s just too foreign. seeing you in a crowd makes it a lot easier for him, because he’s made you aware of his boundaries and discomforts, and you respect them as well as protect them. he values it a lot when people don’t see him as weird but rather particular. it’s honestly more of a comfort to him to be near you in public, but he would absolutely never say that. he’ll spot you, walk up to your group, put a firm hand on the other side of your head and pull his mask down☹️places a little peck on your forehead, muttering ,” hey , you” and then pulling it up again. you smile at your friends and take him aside - he swears you’re an angel for not making him talk to your friends. it’s a little gesture, but truthfully that’s what being with omi is. little gestures full of care, tenderness and understanding </33

•gets excited about small things

okay nOW listen to me . it isnt just any small thing . if the flower he planted sprouts a rose, you’ll hear a shout of ‘ YN, COME OUTSIDE RN’ coming from the yard and you SPRINT BCUS OMI RAISING HIS VOICE?????? but when you get there and you’re HUFFING, PUFFING , BLOWING THE HOUSE DOWN . his eyes are wide and he’s holding his phone up saying ,” yn, look. my roses are blooming,” he says in a tone that’s seemingly floating between excitement and wonder. your posture relaxes, seeing your 6’3 scary dog boyfriend fawn over his yellow roses just warms your heart </33 when you guys get a new cat together ( he is a cat person argue w the wall) he feels a part of him explode when the cat rubs it’s head all over him. he KNEELS to the floor of the adoption centre and holds the kitty’s head in his hands, stroking the little flat area in front of it’s little ears. he glances as you, eyes smile as he’s smiling behind his mask. ☹️☹️☹️END ME.

•picks up on small things

omi is observant as hell , so even when you guys are just friends he picks up on tiny things u do. when u make a weird face when u touch a weird texture or the way u try so desperately to end a convo with someone you ‘ like ’ he absolutely knows what’s going and he’s like “ huh, didn’t know they didn’t actually like that person” but doesn’t say shit. next time that person is around he magically remembers he needs new wet wipes for his gym bag and funny enough it’s on the OTHER SIDE OF THE MALL😔🤞🏻 oh you don’t like the yellow lemony candy in the bag?? that’s weird, funny how it’s all of a sudden omi’s fav one and now he’s eating it all from the bag so u don’t have to. ( he puts in his wedding vows that he actually hates them too but he did it cus he ‘ unfortunately is inlove with you’ , lmao)

raine’s thots ୨♡୧;;

the rose thing was inspired by my mother, she’s a cutie):also maybe one day i’ll proof read this,,, 🤭who knaaaurrrss n e ways this was fun, byebye <33

[sugar-omi]

good lord I was trying to study but out of nowhere I know where🩸this came into my mind:

having a night in at ur grown up house w cove derek and baxter (only dating cove) and everyone gets wasted asf so they sleep over and late at night the other two can hear u and cove in ur bedroom 👀 ykwim?

the smut and angst potential of them getting off to listening to u two from their respective guest rooms and the irony of both ur guests doing it omggggggg 🫣

in the morning neither of them can properly look at u two out of shame and u and cove r just embarrassed cause u think it’s just cause they heard u (and ofc ur only half right)

these ideas fr come to me at the worst time lol

-🗑️

I AM SCREAMING. YOU'RE SO BRILLIANT I CAN'T.... derek would really try not to, but i feel like it'd end up seeping into his dreams and he just can't resist. and baxterrrr omg... he'd be so embarrassed n ashamed, i dont think he'd be able to sleep the rest of the night at all, even once you n cove are done... pls you sent this at the perfect time bc i was about to start writing n i cannot focus until i write this now, i must have this in a fic.. n ik it isn't what you're talking about, but this is also so good n i instantly thought abt this scenario. i will take ANY chance for derek n baxter to fall in love or into bed LOL

tags : NSFW, baxter x derek, one night stand (UNLESS), you and cove drink, auralism*, oral (derek receiving), top/dom baxter, bottom derek, derek has a crush on you/MC, baxter has a thing for both of you or maybe he's just a kinky bastard

*to be aroused by sound. (can be compared with voyeurism)

synopsis : baxter and derek are staying with you for an extended vacation (much needed for both of them.) and while you two have been considerate and lovely hosts, you're a bit loud... not that it's a problem. quite the opposite actually..

imagine baxter is pouring himself a glass of wine, unable to get your and cove's muffled moans out of his head.

he's generous with his pouring, since everyone already had a lot to drink during dinner, being reserved is unnecessary.

baxter tips back his cup, licking his lips, savoring the sweet taste of this wine, humming at the taste. not bad..

he's checking the label, wanting to remember the brand so he can add it to his shelves at home.

"oh."

baxter looks up, tired eyes wide at the sudden guest. he's met with derek's wide eyes, equally tired..

baxter gives a lopsided smile, trying to be friendly with his new friend. he gestures to the barstools across from him, "care to join me?"

derek rubs his neck shyly, "ah, i wouldn't want to impose. i just came for some water.."

baxter shakes his head, leaning back on the island, taking a sip of his wine. if he knew he'd have company, he wouldn't have poured so much at once.

he licks his lips, trying not to eye his glass to see if it looks like an reasonable amount of wine. trying to preserve his put together image is fruitless anyway, baxter is a hot mess walking and you could probably smell his issues all the way from france.

"nonsense, i wouldn't mind company. the best conversations are best shared under the stars, i'd say. although, i won't blame if you're going bak to bed." baxter laughs to himself humorlessly. "probably a better idea than getting drunk again."

derek laughs, "well, if you don't mind the company then.." and goes about grabbing some water before sitting across from baxter, trying to be quiet when he drags out the barstool.

there's a stretch of silence between them, the two of them sipping their drinks and baxter plays off his awkwardness by admiring the photo collage in the hallway, visible through the wide doorway.

baxter turns back to derek, who's holding his water with both hands, dozily looking into the glass. he looks up and is surprised to meet baxter's sharp gaze, but plays it off with a smile.

baxter speaks lazily, his movements languished and his bones heavy. he's feeling warm from the wine, and a bit chatty. "couldn't sleep either, huh?"

derek laughs, "that obvious?"

baxter shrugs, speaking around the lip of his wineglass. "i figured we're in the same boat."

derek stills, his cheeks slowly filling red, and he looks up, trying to figure out if he's trying to say he also heard you and cove doing... it. the other night.

baxter bounces his eyebrows, and that makes derek flush brightly, looking down. "y-yeah, i guess we are.."

he laughs, covering his mouth to muffle the noise.

derek seems to relax a bit at his amusement, and eventually they relax a bit more, and baxter goes on to tell derek more of his wedding horror stories when he asks.

they're laughing, trying to muffle the sound with their hands when they get too loud, and baxter is leaned over the counter, rambling to derek as softly as possible.

baxter signs and shakes his head, a smile still on his lips as he takes another sip. he's definitely getting buzzed again.

and at some point baxter even sits next to him and derek seems to greatly enjoy baxter's open laughter and his wide gestures as he narrates his stories, even throwing up his own chaotic stories about what it was like growing up with his brothers.

"hey.." derek calls, and baxter hums curiously in response. "does that taste good?"

baxter raises his brow but tips his glass towards derek. "it is. it has notes of peach and honey... wanna try?"

derek glances between baxter's eyes and the wine, nodding, taking the glass from his hands and taking a long sip...

baxter's eyes are stuck on derek's lips, his eyes following how his throat bobs when he swallows and his tongue dashes out to lick the wine running down the corner of his lips..

baxter snaps his eyes back towards derek's, who's already looking back at him.

the silence seems long, and the distance between derek and baxter's lips seems even longer, and he feels antsy even though they're both leaning in, their lips meeting in the middle in a soft kiss.

derek deepens the kiss, leaning into baxter, and humming into the kiss when baxter starts rubbing his thigh, his fingers sliding down th fabric of his sweatpants until he's touching his inner thigh, dangerously close to his bulge..

a moan echoes, and baxter and derek break apart, panting and their lips wet and swollen. then they hear it again, and some muffled talking.

they look into each others eyes, unable to move. they're both wide awake now, both because of that hot kiss and the sounds of cove's deep, and futile muffled moans.

their chests rise and fall, tension in the air, mingling with something else...

derek speaks first, taking baxter's hand before he can pull away. "do you... should we go to your room?"

baxter blinks owlishly, shocked and flustered. but really fucking turned on.

"yes, yeah, yeah okay.." he stumbles his words, totally knocked off his feet by the way derek looks at him, his green eyes deep with lust, and the whole turn of events.

derek leads him down the hall, and baxter is grateful he didn't somehow knock over the barstool or the flower vase in the hall.

they walk past your shared bedroom, baxter's designated room for his stay, at the end of the hall.

baxter tries to ignore the way his cock throb when he hears cove curse and growl, "fuck, you're so warm..." he tries not to think about it, but the idea of what you two are getting up to, how you both look and sound, what you're doing to each other...

he's trying not to let his mind run away with him but he's admittedly, a weak man. and so is derek, if the way he clutches his hand tighter and all but shoves baxter through the door and closes the door a bit louder than he should.

you and cove always drown out all other forms of life when you're together, and baxter doubts it's much different in the bedroom, if not "worse."

derek pushes baxter to sit on the bed, standing over him, his legs on either side of baxter's lap and he pulls off his shirt, throwing it on the floor.

baxter licks his lips, his hands sliding up derek's waist and stomach, his body thick and toned with muscles... "goddamn..." baxter exhales, all but drooling at the sight.

derek laughs shyly, lifting his arm to rub his neck (a nervous tick baxter has come to realize) and the muscles in his arm stretches and flex. baxter has a distant thought about derek being able to manhandle him...

"is this okay?" derek asks, suddenly shy now.

baxter nods, leaning in to kiss along derek's bronze stomach, his lips trailing down his happy trail to his bulge. "more than okay.."

baxter tugs on derek's sweatpants, looking up at him. "let me know if you want to stop..."

he tugs down derek's pants and underwear, letting his cock spring free. baxter strokes his cock to full mast, and derek holds onto baxter's hand for support, his other hand coming up to muffle his moan.

baxter wraps his lips around derek's flushed tip, sucking and circling his tongue over the head.

"b-baxter..." derek gasps, his thighs shaking.

baxter takes him deeper down his throat, keeping eye contact as he swallows around his cock, reaching down to palm his own bulge through his satin pajamas.

he groans, the vibrations sending shivers up derek's spine and derek mumbles, his fingers finding their way to baxter's hair, clinging onto the already messy locks.

baxter tears his hand away from his hard-on, to undo the buttons on his pajama shirt, the buttons slipping through his fingers until his shirt is wide open.

"mhm-!" baxter startles, gripping onto derek's thighs, his hips bucking up into his warm mouth.

derek moans shakily, "oh f- i'm sorry. sorry.." he babbles, pushing back baxter's fringe, his thighs twitching and his muscles clenching under baxter's hands.

baxter hums around derek's length, patting his thigh. his tongue drags along the underside of his cock, baxter's lips pulling off him with a pop, his lips wet and puffy.

baxter's sharp, lustful eyes meeting derek's equally horny gaze. derek's flushed cheeks are a feast for baxter's eyes, he can't wait to have him in bed..

"do you.. wanna go further?" baxter asks, his hand making obscene wet noises from all the pre-cum and spit, as he strokes derek's cock in his fist.

derek nods, his throat bobbing as he tries not to fall to his knees or cry out and alert you and cove to what they're doing in here.. "yes, please.."

baxter pulls away, standing up to tug off the rest of his clothes while derek tugs off his pants, almost tripping when the leg gets stuck on his ankle but baxter ignores it since he's not very elegant either, the wine still buzzing through him.

he throws his clothes on the floor, all but throwing himself into the bed with derek, straddling his lap as he captures his lips in a kiss, his tongue slipping past derek's lips, guiding his tongue to move with his own.

derek grips baxter's waist, his hands pulling him down to grind him into his lap, their cocks sliding together.

baxter breaks the kiss, his lips falling to derek's neck...

"cove- cove- cove!" your cry is heard through the wall, followed by muffled moans and whimpers.

"ah!" derek moans, his fingrs digging into the plush of baxter's hips when he bites down on his neck.

"oh- sorry. did i hurt you?" he worries, kissing the area soothingly. he didn't expect you to.. cry out so loudly. not that you aren't allowed to be loud in your own home, or anything like that. he just didn't think you'd sound so hot.

he's trying not to think about if he wishes it was his name on your lips, or what cove is doing to make you call his name so loudly and lewdly...

derek shakes his head, or tries too with baxter under his chin. "i mean, it hurt but.. it wasn't bad..." derek admits shyly.

baxter smiles, pulling off his neck to kiss his lips again, smiling too much to kiss properly but they have all night for that anyway...

he leans over the edge of the bed for his bag, fumbling through the open inner pocket for a condom and lube.

it's not that baxter planned to get laid on this trip, it's just bad to be unprepared.

"do you want to be on top?" baxter inquires, pointing the condom at derek.

he flushes, licking his lips and glancing off to the side. "um.. if you don't mind, you can be on top..."

baxter raises his brows, a blush high on his cheeks.

ohh derek really is interesting.

"not at all." baxter purrs, fixing their position so one of derek's legs is on his shoulder, and the other over his thigh.

he slowly sinks one, then two, then three digits into derek's hole, scissoring his fingers and rubbing derek's thigh soothingly. he's such a mess just from his fingers alone, derek's face half buried in the pillow and his hips bucking up and his thighs shaking.

"that's-" derek pants, swallowing thickly. "that's enough... put it in.. please..." he gasps, peeking at baxter through his lashes.

"fuck..." baxter curses, his stomach dipping with lust.

he fumbles, trying to open the condom but his fingers are covered in lube and he ends up ripping it with his teeth impatiently. baxter rolls it over his length, leaning over to pull derek into a kiss as he sinks into him.

"hmmn!" derek mewls into the kiss, his arms coming to lock around baxter's neck.

baxter slams his hips into derek, a loud slap sounding through the room from baxter's hips meeting his ass. baxter breaks the kiss, hissing.

that was definitely too loud, but it's also been so long since he's been with someone, and derek is so charming, that he's not sure he cares..

derek moans, trying to stifle it by biting his lips.

they pant, letting derek adjust to his length and for them to catch their breath, baxter feels like the air has been knocked out of him with how derek's hot walls are wrapped around him, his hole clenching and flutter around him, trying to take him deeper.

"mn, y/n-" cove voice is muffled, keeping them from hearing the rest of his sentence. although it was probably cut short, if the deep groan they hear through the wall is anything to go by.

baxter pants, "i'm.. i'mma start moving..." he gasps, moving so he's sitting up again, his hand pushing derek's knee up towards his chest.

derek covers his mouth with his hand, baxter's cock dragging so slowly against his walls, his eyes rolling and fluttering shut when his tip bumps against a sensitive spot in his walls, dangerously close to his prostate..

"harder!- ha- oh fuck!" you curse and moan unabashedly loud, followed by your bed frame thumping against the wall.

it quiets down to some creaking, with dull thumps every now and then.

baxter picks up the pace of his thrusts, spurred on by all your sounds from the other room and derek's lewd expressions.

derek whimpers, his moans and cries barely muffled by his hand and when baxter's hips slam into his repeatedly, he can't hold onto his barrage of moans and whines, babbling nonsense.

baxter leans over him, forcing his legs against his chest so he can whisper in derek's ear, stuffing his fingers down derek's throat, his middle and ring fingers pressing on his tongue.

"shh, darling. they'll hear us..." baxter purrs, although he laughs and nods his head to the side, "although, i think being quiet is a bit useless for all of us at this point."

derek whimpers around baxter's fingers, drool pooling in his mouth. he closes his lips around the digits and sucks, swallowing, dragging his tongue along baxter's fingers seductively..

"god." baxter grunts, his face scrunching up in pleasure.

his hips thrust up into derek's g-spot, his thrusts shallow as they both get closer and closer to finishing.

baxter pulls his fingers from derek's lips, a string of spit connecting derek's lips to the digits before it breaks, his hand slipping between their bodies to stroke derek's weeping cock, pre-cum pooling along the valley of his abs...

baxter captures derek in a sloppy kiss, neither of them really trying to hold back their sounds anymore. and from the sounds of it, you and cove aren't worried about being quiet either, your moans more frequent and totally unrestrained.

"i'm gonna-" derek pants, his nails dragging down baxter's shoulder.

"go ahead. cum. cum for me." baxter growls, his hand abusing derek's sensitive tip, making short strokes.

derek's legs shake on either side of him, his eyes rolling as he cums into baxter's hand. baxter groans, his hips stuttering as derek clenched around him, filling the condom.

they melt into each other, their chests rising and falling, and their heavy breathing match.

baxter turns his head to the side, seeing the sky turn from night to early morning..

"i'll.." he pants, pushing himself off derek's chest. "i'll run a bath... wanna join me?"

[willowser]

haiii willow!! i was reading through your work (as i usually do when I’m on here) but i wanna know your thoughts on whether young, early 20s bkg - who currently has a thing for reader - would he feel this impending urge of sexual attraction?? i feel like at that point of time he wouldn’t be having much sex, if any at all but ofc reader is beautiful and sweet and gorgeous!! do u think he’d ever have moments where he’s ogling or he’s just back in his bedroom and all he can think are perverted thoughts and he’s like, “fuck.”

i will continue stalking ur page and reblogging so that’s all! love u🩷🩷🩷👼

oh i am smooching you smooching i say, bc i love this scenario it is my freaking bread and butter 😌✨️🩷

i think he definitely would !! not a total clueless virgin, but he's not really feeling it with anyone, and maybe hasn't for a while—if ever. and maybe he's just like, eh i've got more important things going on rn than who i'm having dinner with i hardly have time to have it with myself 🥺

bc i imagine early 20s bakugou very specifically, especially after what's going on in the manga, so i can completely see him being so sidetracked and not even interested in romance—and then you come along 🥺 and i think it would take him a while to get there, honestly, like. he's got you in the back of his mind for a whole year, even. doing his best not to think about it, but every now and then when things are quiet, his mind is wandering until he's thinking about how you wish him a stupid good morning ! every day and always make small talk with him about all kinds of random shit 😒🥺 he resists the idea that you give him butterflies and tries to tell himself you make him sick LOL

but then—something happens. something small, i think, that is such a non-event but it launches you to the forefront of everything, all at once. maybe you say something funny that makes him do his little evil smile or ask him a question and really listen to what he's saying with big beautiful eyes or you wave at him as you pass each other in the hall and kirishima is with him and then turns to him, grinning so fucking wide, and he's like "bro....why're they smiling at you like that ?? 😏😏😏" and that has bakugou thinking to himself.....oh shit........are they smiling at me like that ??? and then he's so totally gutted by the fact that—he wants you. oh man, he wants you so bad. and i've said this before but i think because he tries to fight that feeling for so long, once he finally accepts it, he's like full speed ahead. he opens that door and it's like the floodgates, the dam has broken, he's neck deep the minute he stepped over.

and i really think bakugou's attraction to someone—like his deep, genuine, heart-achy kind of attraction to someone—is based on who you are, and so the more time he spends with you and the more he thinks about you and the more he gets to know you, it just builds and builds and builds LOL and then that sexual attraction comes bull-dozing in, i think. and i love to talk about this but he thinks he's so not a meat-head that thinks with his dick but he definitely catches himself checking you out and is SO MAD LMAOOO

he's also such a—make a plan, make it happen kind of person, so once he decides he can't stand doing nothing, he's trying to figure out how to make you his. and in trying to plan that out, he's going through scenario after scenario, thinking about what differently he could do when he sees you and how you'll respond, imagining it late at night, dreaming about what you'd say and what you'd do.....what that would lead to, eventually AND HE FEELS LIKE SUCH A PERV LMAOOO he's such a dork

god i literally could go on and on about this forever you don't understand akdhfjskkq this is one of my favorite scenarios for him it's just my default thinking state this point LOL hiiiii friend !!! tysm for asking !!! 😌🩷✨️

[luckybunny555]

Secret admirer

You receive a strange gift and find out the identity of your secret admirer.

Amber Freeman x GN!/Fem!Reader(no pronouns but for sapphics)

Warnings: creepy behavior, stalking, cursing, usual Ghostface behavior, a little bit of trust issues, being "attacked" but not harmed, mentions of murder and violence(no big description tho), a little suggestive in the end(as a treat ;) )

a/n: Part 2. No bad ending, again. I mentioned a song at some point and if you don't listen to it while reading ur not getting the whole experience, disappointing. also, this one's a bit scarier than part one(at least in my opinion). I'm sorry if ur not actually a scared little bitch like I am, but I made the readed very scared because yes. I didn't proof-read the end bc I used every single brain cell I have to finish this today. I might read it later but no promises.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Because you were texting Amber, you didn't worry about walking home alone. The sun was setting, but you were reaching the front door already.

Amber

I can't believe you fell for that

You

Wha-

Mindy had a straight face when

she said that

I thought she just remembered

the movie better than me

Amber

I literally made you watch it a

hundread times

how could you not remember

also, lmk when you get home

You

what did u expect

I also closed my eyes a hundread

times bc I got scared

I'm already unlocking the door

Amber

ok good

told u you'd be safe with me

;)

You felt a warm feeling in your chest, stupidly staring at her message. The smile on your face was an evident sign of how whipped you were for her. Stepping into your home, you lock the door again, not taking your eyes off your phone.

Amber

I'm throwing a party saturday

My parents will be out, they

got a wedding or smth

ur coming, right?

Your smile grew. "Mom?" you shouted, your voice echoing through the empty house. You finally looked away from your phone, scanning the space around you. The house seemed empty, which was unusual. By that time, your mom should be home. All you could hear was faint music, which your mom probably forgot to turn off before she left the house. You walked towards the kitchen, answering Amber's text.

You

ofc, I never miss ur parties

Amber

Liar

You've missed 3 of my parties

You

ok true, but it wasn't on purpose

I don't have plans this saturday

You find a note on the fridge, "Meeting w/ client @ 5pm". Right. That's where your mom was. You place your phone on the counter, opening the fridge and looking for something to eat. Your phone vibrates again, another notification from Amber

Amber

brb, I'm gonna shower

You read the text from afar, still standing in front of the refrigerator. Grabbing a few ingredients, you place them on the counter, turning off your phone screen. More attuned to your surroundings, you recognize the song playing in the background. "We Belong Together" by Ritchie Valens. You didn't remember where you heard it, though. It was just familiar. And nice to listen to while you cook.

Focused on preparing your food, you're startled by the doorbell. You look at the door with your heart already racing. It was a mundane situation, but does anything feel normal when there's a masked killer around?

Slowly, you approach the door. But instead of opening, you look through the window beside it. No one was there. You can feel your heart pounding in your chest, but you try to brush it off. "These fucking kids," you mutter to yourself, walking back to the kitchen.

You

I'm so stupid lol

Some dumb kid just ding-dong

ditched me and I got so scared

Not so long after, you hear the doorbell ring again. You try to convince yourself it's just a stupid prank. A terrible one to play when Ghostface is a threat, but kids are like that, right? This time, you quickly approach the door, determined to catch the person, opening it even though your hands are shaking.

Still, no one is there. But you find something. There's a box on the floor, with a pink bow on top and a note. "Sorry for scaring you :(". You hesitate, but take the box and lock the door again. You put it on the counter, unsure whether or not you should open it. Could it be from that admirer? Or was it from someone else? Before opening it, you decide to get a second opinion.

You

they left a box at my door

there's a note, "sorry for scaring

you"

should I open it?

I think it's from that stalker, but

idk

You wait a few seconds, but she doesn't read your texts. Maybe you should wait longer, but you're curious. It could be great, it could be horrible. Either way, you wanted to know. Maybe your mind was just being dramatic and this was actually a genuine apology gift. You shake the box, trying to make out what it could be, but it doesn't make a lot of noise. Must be something soft and light.

With your hands slightly trembling, you open it. It takes you a split second to understand it, but once you recognize it, you bring your hand to cover your mouth, your breath catching in your throat. Your favorite stuffed animal, one from your collection, with its head cut off. Beside it, another note. "Why didn't you write me back? >:("

Your head was filled with questions, "did they break into my house?", "how did they get it?", "are they still around?". Your phone rings, snapping you out of your momentary trance. It's Amber's number. She probably read your texts and her protective instinct kicked in. Your right hand was still covering your mouth as you reached for your phone. "Amber?"

"Hello, [name]," you don't recognize the voice. It wasn't Amber's, it was a male voice. And then it hits you: Amber's phone was cloned. By Ghostface. At that realization, you gasp, feeling your heart pounding as if it's trying to escape your chest. "Did you like my gift? And my sweet letters?"

You're too shocked to answer. Frozen in place, your only movements are involuntary. The trembling of your hands, the rise and fall of your chest, the accelerated breathing and heartbeats. An uncontrollable fear takes over you. Your eyes are glued to the torn out toy in front of you.

"Will you forgive me for loving you so much that I'm willing to protect you from everything… and everyone?" They speak again, and you slowly remove your hand from your face, supporting your weight against the counter, feeling weak in the knees.

An ounce of rationality is still left in you, despite the terrifying situation you find yourself in. "Where are you?" You ask with your voice shaking, a satisfying sound for Ghostface.

"Don't worry, I'm not inside... yet," the implied threat makes you shut your eyes instinctively, wishing that everything would disappear. But it isn't the brightest idea, so you open them again and look around, trying to stay alert. "Let's play a game, I'll give you three chances to guess who I am. You have to play by the rules. No calling for help, and don't close your curtains. I need to see if you're playing fair."

The last sentence sends a shiver down your spine. They could see you. Your gaze shifts to the window, terrified to see what you'd find. But hopefully, or not, you only saw the sky turning dark. "No..." Your voice shakes again, and you try to hold back your tears of desperation, "I know better than to play games with you."

"Oh, you don't want to play?" They sound displeased, which fills you with dread. "Let's skip forward then, I'll show you who I am," they say impatiently, "Open the front door."

By that time, the tears were falling to your cheeks. Your pants and gasps were audible through the phone, and it felt like your heartbeats were too. You couldn't move, and you obviously didn't want to let them in, but maybe the choice was merely an illusion. Your cries become more evident through the phone.

"Open the damn door, [name], or I'll get in myself and I won't be as nice as I would be," the caller threatened, and you are completely taken over by fear, filling every fiber of your body.

"Please, don't hurt me," you sob, begging for mercy as you turn around, facing the door a few steps ahead of you. You slowly walk towards it, continuing to plead.

"That's not my plan, sweetheart," Ghostface replies on the phone, "as long as you do what I say."

Your hands never trembled as much as they did once they touched the doorhandle. With a deep, shaky exhale, you open the door, facing the terrifying tall frame, covered in black and hidden behind the Ghostface mask. You let out a whimper as more tears fell to your cheeks. You gasp once your eyes meet the shiny blade in their hand.

In a startling, quick move, you were trapped against the wall, with the knife pressed to your neck, and you drop your phone on the floor. Instinctively, you scream, but the gloved hand covers your mouth before you can make a sound loud enough to be heard. They close the door with their feet, the loud noise making you jump in place. You shut your eyes, not wanting to face them.

The two of you were silent for a moment, the faint music filling the eerie atmosphere along with your sobs and loud breaths, followed by Ghostface's amused chuckle. They slowly removed the hand from your mouth, allowing you to breathe more easily, and you open your eyes, scanning the view in front of you. You didn't make a sound, and you tried your best to steady your breaths as much as you could before you had a heart attack.

"I told you I wouldn't hurt you if you behaved," they break the silence, and amidst the turmoil in your mind, you question their intentions and reasons. What made you different to them? Why hadn't they attacked you immediately, like they did with Tara and Vince?

Well, for one, all their love letters and gifts. Somehow, you had Ghostface in love with you, and you just realized that. Two people in one. And now, you could figure out who they actually were.

"Curious?" They ask, noticing the expression on your face, how you bit your lip, making it seem like the wheels in your mind were turning. "Go on, turn it off," the command, tapping on the voice modifier from the mask with their free hand. Your sobs had momentarily ceased, but your hands were still shaking when you hesitantly reached to press the button. You hear a low chuckle behind the mask, "recognize me now?"

It took you a moment to believe it. To make sense of it. Your eyes widened, and the look on your face was clearly of shock. Subconsciously, your lips part slightly in disbelief. How could it be her? "Amber?" you whisper, your voice faltering with hesitancy. You earn a mischevous giggle from the girl in front of you.

Her free hand reaches up, taking off her mask and throwing it on the floor, once again making you jump at the noise. There's a wicked smile imprinted on her face, staining her image in your mind. Noticing your furrowed brows, her expression changes slightly to one of pity, or remorse.

She pouts, her gaze meeting yours with a sympathetic look, "Aw, baby, I'm sorry I had to scare you," her tone changes to a sickingly sweet, an implied mocking of your position and reaction. "I just find it so cute, y'know?"

You weren't expecting that to be her motive. Deep down, it was starting to make you angry at her. But this feeling was buried by the sensation of the cold blade against your neck. And she still had a lot of explaining to do.

"Remember the first time I made you watch Stab?" She asks you, her voice laced with amusement, and a smile growing on her face. "I mean, it' wasn't even such a scary movie, but you were so terrified," she laughs, and even in that terrible moment, you love the sound.

Imperceptibly, she placed a hand on your hip, keeping you in place and maintaining her control. She looks at you with a sweet, satisfied expression. "It was so adorable. I loved how scared you got," she confessed with such a natural, charismatic demeanor, as if she hadn't planned a whole terrifying scene, just for you.

“You were clinging to me and you wanted me to protect you so bad. And I realized, I wanted that too.” With a wide smile, she chuckles mischievously. Her eyes observe you attentively, taking in every detail, every subtle movement. She loved to see your tear-stained cheeks and glossy eyes. It was terrible, and she knew that, but didn't you look impossibly beautiful in that moment? "That night," she continues, her face getting closer to yours as her eyes find your parted lips, "you begged me to let you stay over and to sleep with me. It was fucking cute, seriously," her eyes meet yours again as she lets out a low chuckle. Even though you hated that moment, how scared you were, you still found the genuity in everything she was saying.

"I could barely sleep, because it felt so good to hold you close, and I really felt like I was protecting you, y’know?" Her tone escalates with passion, emphasizing the sincerity in her words. "From what? Nothing. But it was nice.”

It was infuriating to hear everything. To go through all that terror, just because... she liked it? Why would she go so far to scare you?

“But with time you got over it and you didn’t need me anymore. And I still wanted that. I wanted you to need me to protect you," she continues her monologue, a classic after villain reveals. It was really starting to feel like you were in a stupid slasher movie that she likes so much. "I needed some threat, something dangerous to scare you."

You finally find the courage to cut her off, "That's why you did all of this?" Your tone gave away how irritated you were, although still fearful, "Because you wanted me to feel like... I was in a fucking horror movie?" Your voice becomes slightly bolder, in spite of the risk. You couldn't believe her.

She feigns being offended, then exhales with a quiet chuckle. "Sweetheart, the threats were already there," she responds, her grip tightening in response to her growing intensity. "Like that Vince guy. Gosh, he was a weird fucking creep. And you were scared of him, I know that, but he could actually hurt you. And I would never let that happen," she continues to explain her twisted motives. "It couldn’t be anyone else, because I never wanted you to get hurt. I wouldn’t trust anyone else."

At that mention, you recall his murder. You were with your friends at that bar the night he was killed. You were worried about your safety. He was into Liv, and you could very well be his next target. Amber had noticed the way you held her hand in that moment, tightly with worry, but the threat was real, and she wanted to protect you. Which is exactly what she did. What better way to keep you safe than to eliminate the threat? That's how her mind worked.

The slightest hint of understanding was appearing in your expression. A hint that Amber didn't miss, ever so attentive. "Do you get it now?" she asks genuinely, as if everything she did was right. "It had to be me. Because I would never hurt you. Because other people would," her tone is so sweet and caring, you forget she is the one holding the knife to your neck.

Actually, it doesn't matter. She might be holding it, but it means nothing. The girl in front you could've killed you long ago, yet she was confessing everything she did for you, without drawing a single drop of your blood. She might as well be holding the blade against her heart, because the girl is crazy for you, quite literally. If you got hurt, by any means, it would break her. From the moment she fell for you, protecting you was a necessary act to protect herself.

With that understanding, the clarity of your realization, your anger gradually faded. Her elaborate, sick and twisted web had the purpose of protecting you. She was poisoned with love. Could you blame her for her whole performance? (You totally could)

But you didn't. For the same reason you answered your stalker's letters, and opened the gift box. For the same reason you let Amber convince you to watch Stab a thousand times, despite hating horror movies. Yes, you have terrible taste for lovers. But you love the thrill. With her, you'd have security, protection, a little bit of action and lots of excitement. It was a twisted game, but you knew in the end it was safe to play. Because she was completely, head over heels in love with you.

[...]