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#likr in a friend way
neodafloof555 · 1 month
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anyone wanna call and stare at the full moon from a different geographic location than me as well talk for hours into the night as if we're next to each other looking at the same sky full of stars?
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theood · 5 days
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If I could change one thing in my life I'd make it so no one ever commented on food
#elias.zip#im so fucking tired of it!!! joking or not its fucking degrading. just constantly. i get it im so fucking unhealthy all i eat is processed#chemical slop thats gonna kill me at 30 and im the unhealthiest person in the fucking work#world* you dont need to fucking remind me every goddamn day. even the comments that arent bad still make me feel likr shit for eating!!! i#already feel really bad about how poorly i eat. i literally cannot fucking starve myself more basically over this kind of comment.#like damn!!! i sure do have a lot of body issues for someone whos skinny WHY am i even complaining in the first place likr i used to fucking#hate my stomach and its noy when#even* big and i think its gone down bc i eat even less now!!! i cannoy make ANYONE happy no matter what i do or what i cook its always comme#nt comment comment in everything i fucking do. i swear to god im never going to fucking recover from living with them. i would've run away i#f i grew up with them im serious#negative#ihateithereihateithereihateithere#nothing's working out. i csnt make friends. i csnt keep them. im a fucking deadbeat im just like my dad in every conceivable way no ones pr#oud of me no matter what i do and i fucked myslef from any opportunity i had to get out of the system what is the fucking point#i jsut dont knoe anymore!!!!!! its not like the Future even looks good or that i see myself anywwhre but in the exact same spot because all#i ever fucking manage to achieve is self sabotage and whining about how no one loves me. god!!!!!
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ace-with--a-mace · 9 months
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the truth is i actually get so insanely jealous
#not even ab christmas gifts and stuff its likr#idk obvi its christmas ppl will post their hauls but its like damn? more than 3 items person??#every year i get a pair of pjs and something practical. not that im complaining because its shit i use but#we dont make gift lists. we arent asked and arent allowed to want stuff so idk how to ask for it. then ppl ik have 30 plus items of junk an#i donr care ab presents because im a hoarder who doesnt use my shit but they have families who know of their interests#who talk to them everyday and go out of their way to converse. i don't even know my brothers fav color. my mother doesnt know my fav food.#me and my grandma say at most 6 words a day cuz of a language barrier and my father is a baby who doesnt reach out first#i eent to a friends house 2 dsys ago snd the whole family was chatting and the house was so lively and homey#then i go home and nobody says a word to each other. idk what code everyone has that im missing but oh my god im so jealous#im jealous of their relationships their freedom their partners the amount they spend their friendships their personalities#i want to be like them. i want to be them. but im me and the most i said to mom on christmas day was merry Christmas. then get yelled at#l speaks#shut up l#ranting in the tags because i can#its like god took his time making their lives as close to perfect as possible then went to me and was like ehh#he made me odd and offputting enough to make me different then made me 'normal' enough to not raise any flags#then put me in the most virtually normal home environment that at its core is fucked#but idk. its 5 am i havent slept in 2 days merry Christmas happy new year.#posts that couldve gone in the notes app
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flowers-that-sing · 1 year
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didnt think id cry over a fanfiction in which eddie munson has BPD, and steve knows this, and literally outright says that he knows eddie could split over him and say or do or feel very hurtful things, but it doesn’t matter to him and he loves him anyway. fucking God damn
because as much as people have claimed to “not care” that i have BPD, they also make it clear that any symptoms are too much and they can’t handle it. and like, i get that. i do. i know. most people just can’t handle someone like me. i’m probably doomed to be mostly-alone and only have surface-level friendships, barring stitch, for the rest of my life if i don’t get better at hiding it. i’m so fucking lucky to even have stitch. like, even my own parents can’t handle me. i am so grateful for my best friend.
the idea that someone could know exactly what BPD entails, could know what splitting is, could know what it could mean, and instead of running for the hills because im toxic they would actually stay, and love me anyway, the knowledge that it’s possible, that i’m not abusive and evil in the eyes of every person ever on this earth and someone on this planet is capable of loving me anyway even if i never meet them, it’s. oh my God. so many fucking feelings. i wasnt expecting that.
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tubzozone · 2 years
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any time ppl comment about how they lovr true crime and eat it up on posts about how so much true crime shit treats devastating tragedies and victims lives as entertainment and money opportunities an angel loses its wings btw. liek shit you can enjoy hearing about crime scenes theres nothing wrong with that but there Is something wrong with how fucking desensitizrd people have become to tragedy and how the true crime genre has so so many peiple who will use that to their advantage. people fucking died. be respectful you pieces of shit their lives arent entertainment learn how to respectfully learn about murder stories w/o being all yep thats me i listen to that 😊 whenever someone talks abt how fucked up it is that minorities get brutally murdered just for the media and some detached youtuber to throw all respext out the window so they can get some content
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nomairuins · 3 months
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i want to watch the things on my watchkist but i also never do its rly tragic
#i have plenty of time i always could but instead im like idk what abt laying in bed#whatever. im having a stupid gay moment so i have to like do that instead. <- this judt means i have to sit here and go God i want to be#loved god i wabt to hold somebody i need to be held i should buy a revolver. not elaborating on the last one there are several ways you can#interpret it.#DJFBFJFNFJGNGN#IT JUST. SIGHHH. SIGHHHHH. its my fault for engaging with romance media bc it always makes me so lonely. which sucks#bc it also makes me giddy at times like i like it. but then im likr I dont have this and then i get all emo#its whatever one day when we spontaneously grow and become a real person maybe we will be able to like go out and do like. i dont know#something#almost 1 year its crazy yk. idk.. sigh. i need 2 get my ged#not rly related to any of it but it is ged is the Thing i need to do so i can do everything else#like i need a ged to get a job i need a job to fix my life (itll force me to keep a schedule again) and to get money and i need money to#do Anything at all. sigh#i miss alcohol but also drinking alone sucks. but i cant drink with ppl anymore bc i get too sad. not like my friend edibles who never make#me sad At least not abt that. there was that post abt like humanity through the ages that i cried at RLY HARD for a full hour bc i kept#crying until my screen turned off and then calming down a bit and then turning my phone back on and seeing the post again and immediately#crying again DJFNJF#anyways ive been thinking and i rly wish there was likee. sigh. unfortunately ignoring the mushy stuff i need a partner for utility purposes#1 finances 2 i cant drive and i dont think ill ever be able to . ik i should just try and learn but the thought makes me real life nauseous#but i also uppn reflection would like to live in the countryside maybe. idk i change my mind constantly#bc city is convenient and i havent lived in Cities very much i dont like suburbs bc you cant walk anywhere and theres nothing 2 do#cities you can walk everywhere country you cant but you get to be outside and i want to start being outside again... creek rly solidified#this. my dream house it has a creek nearby#in fact its kind of exactly the same as the creek at granny n papaws house. but without leeches LOL. and maybe less cow shit#but ya. thered be a creek... well in one of my dreamhouses at least#my dreamapartment there isnt a creek bc the apartments in a city with lots of food options. which is a requirement#but maybe there is a little creek in the park in the city but i couldnt swim there i bet. unfortunately.... sigh. but this is where partner#with car clmes in in both situations is in rhe city they could drive me out to a lake . we would go together and maybe wed paddleboard#or we could get one of those little boats that you umm. with the umm. feet. what the... what r they called#whatever we had those at family reunions w papaws family when i was a baby. they were fun. paddleboat???????
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lovecatsys · 6 months
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trying to figure out exactly what it is about watxm's portrayal of Quentin that makes him so unlikable and annoying
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my brain will come up with the most terrifying body horror concepts in the entire world just to scare me specifically
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strawbebyjam · 10 months
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:)
#realized im never getting over my ex. time to play apt 502!#HDJDJDJDJDJ#i’ve gotten better at not like. giving in to the part of my brain that begs to talk to them or ask about whether we’re still gonna stay#in contact / be friends / keep checking in#like. i’ve realized that i’m no longer doing it for the good of anyone. i havr no way of knowing whether it’s making things worsr or better#for them the more i do it but i feel like hearing from me at all mudt feel gross or repulsive on some level#so i’m doing my best to like. fight my brain JDJJJDJD#hurts! but if i give in to my brain’s demands it’ll go from hurting to stabbing. likr i’m making things worse for everyonr#need to focus on like. not failing another semester and getting my degree for once HDKDKDJD#but. i can treat myself to a little well written interactive fiction. even if i dont really deserve it. HDJJDJDJ#mano.mindtalk#neg#i keep yhinking im handljng yhings better and im always wrong. just yhis morning i thought i was doingbetter than yesterdayand now im doing#so much worsr and everyday jm further behind. and jm terrified. and im sl heartbrokenand i dont know what im trying yo do anymore#and i sre family and ftiends and everyone getting so muchjoy and i am so happy for thembht it breaks my heart#and i wannatry to get help but its so hardand all the times i have tried it hasntworked#i wanna get better so badly. i wanna be good so badly. and i keep getting furthe and further from it and saying horriblethings yo myself and#veing so hopeless and it makes me so sad i dontknow how i endeduo like this again
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lateseptemberdawn · 10 months
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The way this one friend has been annoying the shit out of me these days like...insane. iTS DRIVING ME INSANE JANDJANSKSK
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folklorepridebitch · 1 year
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So I saw a yt video 'explaining alcohol to an alien' or something like that a while ago and it was all like yeah we poison us for fun har har and like Yes but also now I'm thinking
What if there's an alien race that's just... Not as intelligent as humans are. There are some plants they eat that make them able to focus better for a short while, and as their society grew they used these and made drugs to basically sharpen their minds for work purposes, like just the ones doing the more complicated jobs, and during off hours they're still just dumb and having fun
And when they meet humans and learn about alcohol sure at first they're like Wtf you poison yourselves for fun?? But then they learn more about it and it sounds like drinking alcohol has the same effect on humans as Not eating their own drugs has on the aliens
And they're likr
WtFfff you are just like that All of the time no wonder you need to dumb it down sometimes to deal with reality
Edit: I've an addition lmao
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(not reblogging from the person who tagged that bc I think calling them out would be kinda mean but)
HOw do you miss the point of a funnypost about fictional aliens so completely lmao
Me: 'what if there are aliens who are just Dumb. Like way dumber than humanity, in general. Dumb to the point where they need drugs for everyone doing complicated jobs so their society can advance'
Them: 'but we have that it's coffee'
'We have that'? We have what? We, humans, are dumber than humanity and absolutely nobody can do complicated jobs without caffeine because coffee equals braincells????? Lmfaooooo
So just to clarify because apparently it's needed xD I'm thinking rly animal like aliens or if you want to go IQ points 50-70, until they stumble across a plant that unlocks sth in their brains so they get to IQ 100 or so but only directly after eating it, and with that they figure out the skill to harvest the plant and turn it into a drug that puts them on par or above human average intelligence and creativity etc. But they're not used to being like that full time! They're used to thinking about food and sex and friends and sleep, only being more complicated when it's necessary for work, and the thought that we humans are thinking deep thoughts All The Time about philosophy and politics and maths and the future and whatnot actually sounds terrifying and horrorlike to them
...if you want to reblog this without the addition there's a blank here
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prettylittlels · 9 months
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Special Night
summary: while performing your latest song, Houdini, at the Golden Globes, your performance drives people crazy.
(tom blyth x singer!reader)
a/n: this song has been stuck in my head for the past few weeks and i needed to make a scenario w it. hope you like it!
ps: i'm akso running out of ideas so please send requests!!!
🪻🪩🌃🔮🎶
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Tonight, I'm going to perform at the golden globes gala. My latest song, Houdini, has captured everyone's attention and soared thorugh the billboard Top 100. The problem isn't performing the song: I know every lyric and practised every detail of the choreography to the brim. The problem is who I'm performing it to. Hundreds of celebrities I admire and thousands and thousands of people around the world are going to be watching me sing.
-Y/n!- my manager interrupts my thoughts -You're on in two-
-Thanks, Diane - I say back, and start my vocal exercises.
In the middle of my preparation, I listen the host of the night announce my appearance. I smoothen out my little black dress and, slowly, I make my way to the stage. The lights are low and I still can't see anything farther than the edge of the stage. My earbud informs me the song will start in 3, 2, 1...
I come and I go
Tell me all the ways you need me
I'm not here for long
Catch me or I go Houdini
The crowd immediately starts roaring as the song plays for the first time. My choreography is catching everyone's eye. I feel the confidence soaring inside of me. This wasn't so bad as I thought it would be, huh?
I come and I go
Prove you got the right to please me
Everybody knows
Catch me or I go Houdini
The celebrities in front of me stand up one by one and dance to the rythm of the music. Since I was well known for interacting a lot with fans during concerts, why not do the same thing now?
Time is passin' like a solar eclipse
I descend the stairs in one of the stage's corners and the crowd screams even more. Searching for someone to dance with, I find first Anya Taylor Joy, dressed in a beautiful pale blue gown, singing along with me.
See you watchin' and you blow me a kiss
It's your moment, baby, don't let it slip
Come in closer, are you readin' my lips?
I make eye contact with her and blow her a kiss, following the lyrics. Her cheeks go red and laughs with me. I go closer to her and keep on singing along, until I signal to her to look at the camera and strike a pose with me.
They say I come and I go
Tell me all the ways you need me
I'm not here for long
Catch me or I go Houdini
I come and I go
Prove you got the right to please me
Everybody knows
Catch me or I go Houdini
Moving on from Anya, I walk up a couple tables more. Next, I set my eyes on Pedro Pascal, dancing to the rythm with his eyes closed. I look surprised and the camera points towards where I'm looking. The crowd laughs as we dance together.
If you're good enough, you'll find a way
Maybe you could cause a girl to change her ways
Do you think about it night and day?
Maybe you could be the one to make me stay
Pedro spins me around sloppily and I sing and I give him a kiss on the cheek and continue walking down the carpeted hall. The choreography makes an appearance again, with a sexy twist: I drop to my knees suddenly and sing the bridge. I get up again and the most beautiful man fills my vision.
Everything you say is soundin' so sweet (ah)
But do you practice everything that you preach? (Ah)
I stare and get closer to him while singing. He sends a big gummy smile towards me and I try to keep my composure. I notice he's sitting next to Hunter Schafer, my good friend. I make a mental reminder to ask her about it later.
I need something that'll make me believe (ah)
If you got it, baby, give it to me
I walk a little more until I'm looking down at his face and bend down while still singing. Out of impulse, I grab his chin gently and bring him in closer so it looks likr we're kissing. Our lips graze each other's and I feel like an electric discharge electrocuted my entire body. I pull away at the last second and continue walking and dancing, trying not to come back to him.
They say I come and I go
Tell me all the ways you need me
I'm not here for long
Catch me or I go Houdini
I come and I go (I come and I go)
Prove you got the right to please me
Everybody knows (I'm not here for long)
Catch me or I go Houdini
Everyone's mouths are open after my little stunt. I smirk to myself and I decide that's it for today.
If you're good enough, you'll find a way
Maybe you could cause a girl to change her ways
Do you think about it night and day?
Maybe you could be the one to make me stay
I go up the stairs one last time to finish off the performance. The people are cheering for me again. But right now, I only care about one of them now. I search for the mystery man with my eyes all over the place, he's nowhere to be found.
I come and I go
Tell me all the ways you need me
I'm not here for long
Catch me or I go Houdini
I come and I go (I come and I go)
Prove you got the right to please me
Everybody knows (I'm not here for long)
Catch me or I go Houdini
Screams and shouts fill the space when I finish the song. The camera focuses on the people who I've danced with and projects it onto the screens. First, Anya appears smiling and waves to the cameraman. Later, Pedro is still giddy from dancing and whoops loudly. Finally, Tom Blyth, as it says on the bottom of the screen, is clapping like everyone else. There are rests of a blush in his cheeks, but when he looks at the camera, he winks at it and lifts his hand with his pinky and thumb up, signaling a phone, mouthing the words "call me".
The camera switches back to me. I blow the last kiss to the audience and, before leaving, I make a "T" with my hands, and after a second I create a heart.
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eviltomatoe · 2 months
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So like after reading all these twst x reader (yuu) fics I rlly tought about it like tbh Idk bout yall but if it were me I would never get into a relationship with any of them (not that theyd want me either but like hypothetical 😭) no matter how much I like them cus like yuu would have to go back to their world at one point, so what would be the point of starting a relationship knowing yall would have to break up anyway, like in most of the fics yuu just decides to just stay in twst, but like I would NEVERRR, like imagine staying in a whole another world, that would be dangerous, yuu would just be putting themselves in danger that way, like imagine the government finds out i doubt they would just let them walk freely, also imagine all the world/biology difference, yuu could never go to a hospital or anything cus first of realistically they would have a whole difference biology compared to them, and also the whole magiv thing and culture different, the history (also since I hdc earth folks to be extremely weaker compared to the twst folks on average, likr a 10yo twst kid could beat up a grown man from earth)(also magic "allergy") also another reason yuu might wanna go home like homesickness also their family and friends imagine yuus family thinking their missing and looming for them everywhere not knowing that all their efforts it pointless cus their not even on Earth, (also another hdc twst food and water is different from earth so yuu would have to figure out which food is ok for then to eat and which is dangerous, etc) also imagine how different morals in twst are things what we conside immoral might be moral in twst and vice versa, but also imagine it's one of the rich guys like Malleus/kalim/vil/leona that confess, NEVERRR like not only bcs they are from another world but also bcs of how popular they are (idk the other word so I just say popular) like I feel like that would be too much responsibility, and everyone would know about it, also it would be difficult since they are so famous, imagine if you guys break up or smth the puplic would go wild ANNND bcs of how famous they are it would be even more difficult for yuu being an alien and they would prob be discovered even sooner, also as someone who's terrified of childbirth and pregnancy, imagine marrying kalim or Malleus, kalim wants a big family and Malleus is pretty much self explanatory
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kurosstuff · 1 year
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Hello, how are you doing? :)
Since requesrts are open and your writing is marvelous, I wanted to request an Azula x gn reader oneshot/fic where reader is a childhood friend who grew distant to Azula over time, but is now chosen to be her fiancé in an arranged marriage.
You don't have to write it, but I still hope you likr the idea!
Have a great day ^^
Hi! I'm doing better at least! Thank you so much♡ It means so much to me to hear you like my writing!
I'd like to apologize for not writing this sooner- was taking a break with long fics- and idk how accurate azula is still- haven't watched fhe show in so long-! Also hope I got Ozai ok? Never wrote anything with him in it before I don't think
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I got carried away♡.. this came out as more of a reconnection type thing? Eh- maybe that's good?
Summary: read ask♡
Warnings(?): azula being azula, reader freaks out/panics alot, ozai, soft(?) Azula(she's like kinda nice sometimes); slight angst. Misunderstanding(but not really), friends to strangers to lovers(?), both reader AND azula are oblivious on how they really feel,
Azula x G/N reader: arranged
Being azulas friend had its ups and downs
Mostly downs
"Oh, come on, Y/N. Don't such a kid, " Azula grumbled, trying to get you to stay still. She read a trick where if someone still stays, a firebender can hit the target above the person's head without any injury. In a book for children for whatever reason. "I'd never hurt you," which is partly true - Azula wouldn't hurt you on purpose, or she would - you weren't actually sure
But like time- friendships come and go.
As you grew older, you saw how awful of a person Azula was turning out to be. How cruel of a person she truly was - how little care she had for another being - even her own brother. Seeing how she was amused and not concerned for her brother during the Agni Kai- you decided enough was enough.
This 'friendship' was becoming too dangerous too frightening. You were aware you can't just up and end the friendship you decided to distance yourself from her. Feeling confident, she wouldn't notice the change
-
You weren't sure if she ever noticed- if by chance she did. She never said or gave the indication she knew. After a couple of months, you stopped coming around to hang out.
You felt bad, but you believed this was for the best.
It's been almost a three full year when you received the letter. One you'd overlook if it weren't for the very specific golden charm closing the envelope showing it was from the royal family. Usually, being given this letter is either an honor or.. something much worse. Swallowing down your nerves, you sat down staring at the envelope for almost an eternity. Opening it carefully, you begain to read.
Everything seemed normal in the letter besides the fact you are to be summoned to the Fire Lord himself for something. Totally normal. Not like your gonna die or anything. Be shipped off to war maybe? You'd 100% are not worried.
Nope.
-
Rushing to get ready, you practically jumped in the air in Fright when you heard the knocking on the door. Your nerves were shot, and this whole thing was just making it worse.
You almost hoped to not see her there. But that'd be impossible since she lived there. Opening the door two guards stood infront of you looking at you sternly.
"Are you Y/N?" Nodding your head yes- you didn't trust your voice at the moment. They turned and gestured to follow "come. We will escort you to the Palace"
-
You don't remember anything on the way there - it was all a blur - you blame it on your nerves, but it did help distract from the imitating Palace. Until you got there. The two guards stepped out and opened the door for you - following them the huge door to the Palace opened slowly with a creek. You took a deep breath and stepped in- turning you watched as the doors closed, sealing your fate. Locking you in - A sound of someone clearing their throat caught your attention
"This way," following closely, you dared not speak, not trusting your voice - and for the fact your throat was so dry a word couldn't get out when if you wished it.
Being led by two fully armed guards was almost as unnerving as the lack of decorations in the halls leading to the Fire Lords office. It was devoid of anything to show the human side of him - if there was any. The only lights shown were from flames - obviously, one's from the Fire Lord himself probably made. The only sounds you could hear was the sound of your heart beating harshly in your ears and the metal taps of the swords on the guards.
Stopping in front of huge double doors, they turned to you unblinking. "He's inside." Was all they said before they opened the doors for you. Once you stepped in they shut loudly the candles blowing out closest to you leaving you alone in the dark- minus the glow of flamed down the hall. Clenching your hands you took a deep breath and tried to relax-
The closer you got to the flames- the more the urge to run as far as you could got worse- alarm bells ringing in your head at the thought of this all going wrong. Something practically 100% possible. Even on his good days, he would be cruel. Stopping in front of the flame wall blocking you from the full view of the man himself - Fire Lord Ozai. His face covered in the shadows from how he sat, but the flames didn't hide how terrifyingly huge he looked - bowing in respect you were about to great him- before he put his hand up to stop you
"Do you know why I asked you here?"
It took you a moment to gain the courage to respond - surprisingly, he allowed you the moment - as if he thought you actually knew the reason. "No, Fire Lord Ozai. I do not. " A deep hum was all you got in return - fabric moved, glancing up, you gulped.
He stood up.
Walking towards you, the flames moved, almost glinding out of his way like a door - he stood before you. Moving his hand in a gesture, you understood to stand straight up , your eyes cast away in respectfear. Walking around you in a circle.
Like a predator hunting his prey. He stood in front of you again after a moment. "Yes. You are perfect." The odd complaint from him did nothing to ease you - seeing your confusion, he hummed."There's an arrangement. Obviously, your Father never told you." The look you held did nothing to stop him,"the arrangement was. His firstborn was to marry my firstborn." The words he spoke caused a mixed sense of emotions in you- confusion, anxiousness. And fear from what was your next thought.
His firstborn was banished.
"But. Giving the events that unfolded with my firstborn. The agreement changed a bit. You will marry my second born."
Clicks of footsteps echoed behind you. You didn't dare look behind you.
"You are to marry my daughter- Azula. Whom I was made aware you were friends of sorts." Turning away, he walked back to his throne. "You will be Wed in two months."
Behind you, someone cleared their throat, turning around, and froze. Azula stood arms crossed, staring at you - almost glaring from how narrowed her eyes were. The same smug smirk from years ago is still present. She almost didn't seem to change much but all the more terrifying. Even if deep down you were happy to see her
"Well. Hello Y/N, " she spoke, voice coming out in a condescending purr. "It seems like we have some catching up to do." Turning, she gestured you to follow her
-
You followed Azula to her room. You've been in it once before, but that was years ago. Before you felt comfortable - now you felt uneasy - tense about the whole thing. Standing far away from the bed but close enough, you looked around the room - it looks the same as it did, but with some added things such as plants and a new dresser replacing the old silver one she used to own.
Azula sat on her bed, pulling some books out to go through every once in a while, looking up at you - face unreadable. Shows how much has changed before you could tell what she was thinking even if she wouldn't show it - now it's like she's a new person - and in a way, she is.
"What's the matter with you?" Azula asked(more like demanded), looking over at her- Azula seemingly growing frustrated at the books in her hands- what about you weren't sure. Turning towards you with eyebrow raised an annoyed look on her face. You haven't answered her yet
"Oh- uh, nothing. Why?" Humming she placed the book down on her lap- gesturing towards the bed. Getting the message you sat down on the edge. She sat silent for a moment before sighing.
"Look." She started after a while. She took a second to think her response through - it was an odd sight. Azula glanced at you- raising an eyebrow at the unnerved state you were in. Standing up, she walked to her counter. "I get it. The situation we're in is weird. " Pulling some object out, she turned to face you. Handing it to you. It looked like a squishy turtle duck
Seeing the confusion on your face when you took it, she sighed, facing away from you once the look of realization hit you. "You always needed something to hold to calm down when you got like this." She spoke, sitting down beside you. Turning it around the squish toy was the same one you were given- and forgot about years ago. When you and Azula were close. The same accidental burn mark on the shell of the toy. You still remember how she gave it too you
-
Sitting on the bench, you held your hurt, burning hand crying. Clutching them close - you knew you shouldn't have let Azula talk you into doing such a trick.
A dangerous trick - yet she did. And here you sat hurt.
And alone.
Hurried footsteps came from behind you - you knew those footsteps. Sitting upright, you used your uninjured hand to whip the tears away harshly. You didn't want to give Azula another reason to tease you.
"There you are" she spoke. Sitting next to you she held something behind her. Face slightly flushed from either embarrassment or what you didn't know- nor gave it much thought once a toy was shoved in your face "here- I. I heard from the towns people that a thing called a 'squishy' helps calm people down. Brings comfort or whatever. So take it. It's yours" Holding it in your hand you smiled tearfully. Azula looked like she practically softened before she turned to your hand- huffing she gestured for it
"we need to clean this."
-
The memory brought a happy smile to your face. Looking up, you saw the quick look of relief on Azulas face before it hardened. "..you kept it?" A shrug was all you got in response for a moment
"Of course I did." Azula mumbled before clearing her throat, brushing you off without a word. Turning away from you - Azula was silent as you messed with the squishy in your hand. Turning towards you, she opened her mouth before shutting it. This caused to pause - Azula never hesitates, nor does she stop until she gets what she wants. Somethings wrong
Before you could ask, a knock came at the door. After giving permission, a maid came in bowing, "My lady, your training room is ready for you." A wave of her hand and the maid ran off hurriedly down the hall.
"You're coming with me." Azula spoke standing. She walked to the door, glancing back at you - an eyebrow arched. Obviously she was waiting for you to follow. Trying to swallow your nerves you jumped up putting the squish on the bed before turning to follow Azula.
The walk was quiet
-
Entering the training room a couple test dummies stood around the room. Arms stretched out like you used to see from the target practice dummies you'd come acrossed before.
"Sit there- I'll be back" Azula pointed towards some benches a bit far off- you sighed- it's better to just let her do what she says half the time anyways.
After you sat on the bench, Azula moved to the changing room. Her mind jumbled. Scattered around, and she couldn't think of a good reason as to why. Pacing back and forth, she clenched her jaw angrily
Azula was panicking on the inside - ever since she found out it was you, she was to marry. Even worse when she saw you. Would she be a horrible wife? Be like her father and treat her spouse horribly to the point of another abandonment? No. She won't be like him. Azula refuses to treat the one she's bound to in such a way - even Azula isn't that cruel of a person. She's not soft - she's not kind either. She knows the reason why you left her even if you didn't say.
It was her fault
Learning the first choice of who you were originally gonna be married to didn't help her feel good at all. Did you know you were gonna marry her brother? That you left cause of that? The selfish, selfish side of Azula prayed that was the real reason you left. She knows it's not, but it's just easier to think
She wants to prove that she's the best choice - the only choice. Of course, the arranged part of the marriage didn't make her feel happy made her feel horrible. If you were to marry her, she'd want it to be of your free will - not be forced.
Azula stopped pacing. What? Why is that the thing she's focused on. Blinking she crossed her arms. Of course the thought of someone being forced to marry her set an uneasy feeling inside her, but. The thought of marrying you wasn't bad at all-
Why is that? It makes no sense why Azula was and still is hung up on a loss of a friend. The loss of you since the beginning was horrible. It made her sick- she'd admit it only to herself now that she missed you- but.. why does she feel relief from the thought of marrying you? Was it cause she knew you?
Shaking her head she quickly got dressed
-
Fiddling with your thumbs, you glanced around the room - thankfully, in a more relaxed mood. Your heart no longer felt like leaping out of your chest. The whole area was spotless- which wasn't a surpise given how certain people would react to a messy training hall. You shuddered at the memory.
Looking over when the door opened, your face flushed a bit. Azula was already looking your way when she came out. Without a word, she stepped up and moved the dummies a bit before she begins she started to stretch. Standing straight she smirked back at you.
"Keep those eyes on me," she begain her training. Hitting the dummies far back with a punch in the air- blue flames came out in a flicker illuminating her air and passing some of the training dummies closest- but surprisingly never touching them. Only hitting her target
It wasn't much of a surpise on how good of a fighter Azula was- but you can't help but you can't help but still be surprised at how well she can control her flames. You've seen fire benders fight and train before, this wasn't the first- but it was the first seeing just how different she was to the others. If anyone else tried this. Tried to hit the target from the farthest to the front. 100% the flames passing the others would be hit and burned, but for Azula- it was like it never touched.
The more she hit and kicked, the more in awe you were in watching. If anything, it looked like a dance you'd see from how fluent and confident Azula moved to attack.
As quick as she began, the training ended. Azula walked towards you, and she didn't even break a sweat- even her hair was kept in place even though she was hitting and kicking. Standing infront of you she crossed her arms almost smirking. "Well?" She spoke with an eyebrow raised
"You were perfect! How did you even do that?"
"I'm a natural. No trouble at all" Azula spoke smugly- she wasn't gonna tell you how long it took for her to get the attack right when she was younger. Everything needs to be perfect. Azula hummed, interrupting your praise for a moment. "..We added more flowers to the garden. I'll show you" she spoke almost oddly. The praise you gave her felt weird- but it filled her ego. Of course it was perfect.
This was Azula
Nothing less than perfect no matter what.
She turned to leave to redress ignoring your call.
"We'll go once I come back"
-
The garden wasn't totally different from how it was since the last time you saw it. The tree in the middle has grown much older but still hanging strong - a knew bench was placed near it, giving the tree and pond underneath. The sun hitting perfectly in-between the leafs and from the rocks below made it have almost a glow to it.
Looking around, the bushes nearby were cut in the specific square way the Fire Lord himself seemed to prefer rather than the rounded ones. Stopping once you heard quaking noises. A smile came over your face, walking to the center pond. You knelt down, looking at the turtle ducks
"Here. You can feed them if you'd like" Azula spoke, holding a small bag of bread out. Thanking her you took it and started to break them up. Azula watched her eyes softening at the sight.
Azula couldn't put her finger on what was wrong with her. Was it her nerves? Why does this scene in front of her make her feel off? The way you're kneeling in front of the turtle ducks the way you gently fed them. The way the lowering sub hits your face. Blinking, she scowled, looking away from you. Looking out to the pond on the other side
"Do you want to feed one, Azula?" Not getting a response, you looked over, frowning at what you saw.
Azula looked almost troubled by something. "Azula?" Calling out to her gave no help. It was like she was here but not here at the moment. Calling out to her again in a softer tone to not startle her- she blinked at you slowly before registering where she was. Standing up, you watched her closely
"Azula. Are you ok?"
Azula just nodded slowly. A moment passes before she bits her tongue. A question on the tip of her tongue. She doesn't want to ask. But she has to. She needs to if she really wants to not be like her father. Not in this way at least
"Are we still friends?" Azula asked before she could stop. "Like I know this is an arrangement but. Are we?"
You didn't responded right away. Just stood there thinking. The way she looked at you- you couldn't tell what she was thinking. It was like looking at a new person. Slowly nodding your head "yes we are." You bit your lip in thought "can we have a do over? From how things ended-" it was a selfish thing to ask. To pretend you didn't just disappear from her life.
Azula nodded her head
"Then.. we can start over?" You said, looking away from Azula for a moment - turning back to look at her - her gaze was on the pond in front of you both.
"Don't see why not. We're not getting married for a couple of months, so we have time"
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karmautistic · 11 months
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My favorite brand of torisai is Toritsuka realizing hes Not Straight after rumors spread around school that Saiki's dating some guy
It's not true but he's like l. Trying obnoxiously to be a good ally (for girls to likr him and see him as a "sensitive" and "kind" guy) so hes like hey Saiki. If you swing that way, I totally support u man. Always♡ if I was gay, id totally date u. Thats how cool u are
Nd Saiki is like what the fuck are you talking about. Also please never imply I'd date u ever again.
And then the rest of the plot is Toritsuka tsking it way too personally and watching him interact with every other guy like "uhm IM NOT GAY but if I was WHY WOULDN'T SAIKI DATE ME. OH HE THINKS HES TIO GOOD FOR ME? IM GONNA PROVE HIM WRONG" and spends the entire episode trying to one-up all his friends with romantic gesture
And then it ends with Saiki explaining it was just a stupid rumor that spun way out of hand, but now the rumors have ebtirely changed to Toritsuka having a giant annoying crush on Saiki
And I mean well... if he doesn't stoo them from spreading he was just "busy" or "didn't notice" ok?♡
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kuruk · 3 months
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sorry to feminists and sll I'm sorry but I genuinely would kind of love an adtually sort of crazy possessive girlfriend but the problem is everyone who says they're obsessive and deeply romantic like that usually isn't even because like I see your girl posting about having sex with an ugly actor and the graphic details of her anime boy harem for everyone to see and you still haven't killed yourself. just becayse you have a petplay kink doesn't mean yuo can make such claims. you may want to jumin han it up and lock your girlfriend in a cage but thwts just because it's hot you don't even gaf like that really truly just where is the passion. whqr was I saying. well I need somekne who's genuinely a little bit unreasonable not because I want her to feel bad but because I naturally keep that sort of thing in mind anyway and well it shouldn't be for nothing I'm soo considerate and for what literally for whqt... I don't take pride in my partner's jealousy that sort of thing makes me so sad I just would do such a good job at preventing it is all... I don't mean in a way that's like controlling over matters like my friends or something but I want to have to think twice about how I talk about the otome game I'm playing or something sorry help like iwould love unreasonable requests and rules about things that truly aren't a big deal. I adtually love altering small behaviors to make my gf comfortable but no one even gives a care likr that I'm too attracted to the aloof so it's simply not needed but I so want to take care of things like that god whatevevr Whatever.
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