#like yall can get mad
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
skywarpie · 3 months ago
Text
The same people in the ghost fandom saying that "you need to respect others boundaries" are literally the same ones making those issues
10 notes · View notes
astrolotte · 2 months ago
Text
listen guys I love Peri a lot too, I think there's a lot about his character worth studying and that he's a good guy but you all have GOT to stop blaming Dev here when Peri is arguably more at fault!
Sure, Dev was mean to him, but Peri was mean back! And Peri is an adult while Dev is a ten year old child, Peri should have the capacity to not complain about him directly to his face, especially considering Dev has been emotionally abused all his life.
Ultimately, I don't consider it to be either of their faults. Sure, Peri was bad at this, but he straight up didn't have any experience except for Timmy, where he took up the role of a brother instead of a parent, a VERY different dynamic. Peri should've gotten like at least 3 different godkids before someone like Dev, to give him a feel for how different kids can be, and how you need to deal with different situations in their own ways. And that's just the lowest I'd advise going, he should've definitely had more.
So I blame the system for throwing him to the wolves fresh out of schooling, especially considering, iirc, Fairy Academy is canonically pretty terrible, as it's more like a military academy than an actual school. He had no proper experience, no way of knowing how to help a kid that doesn't seem to want to be helped...
But if you're going to blame anyone, blame Peri. Not the child that he was supposed to help, the child that he failed.
Mind you, 10 year olds literally don't even have fully developed minds yet, of course his sense of morality is a bit twisted. His brain isn't fully grown!
77 notes · View notes
lyriumsings · 1 month ago
Text
The assumptions people are making on Veilguard bc ALL decisions won’t carry over are insane to me “OH so morrigan won’t mention her ONLY SON!! or her roMANCE??”. We have no idea what context or capacity she’s going to be in the game? In skyhold, she stayed at skyhold for a while, so it made sense to chat her up and ask about her life. Also Kieran was THERE bc he was TEN. Kieran is now in his twenties and most likely living his own life. If we’re saving the world and fighting darkspawn WHY would her grown ass son come up? Esp when she doesn’t even know Rook?? Like i would understand if we had veilguard in our hands and people were complaining bc Morrigan actually had dialogue invalidating their canon but for fuck’s sake the game isn’t even out yet. They’re saying it doesn’t matter as in it’s not gonna come up bc Rook is busy doing other shit, rather than quizzing characters who aren’t companions on their lives. “What about Varric”. Varric seems to have a pre-established relationship with Rook which means you can headcanon that they already had the talk about Varric’s life story considering he called them his “second in command”. Like cancel your preorders, preorder, do whatever you want no one on the internet is the boss of you. But oh my fucking god complaining about something you don’t even fully know about is already getting so old. Best case scenario, you’re right and i guess your bitching is validated yay for you ig. Worst case, you’re wrong and like wasted so much time and energy bitching for nothing. Like I completely understand being upset the choices don’t carry over, it IS disappointing! But we don’t even KNOW what it’s going to affect if anything at all. It’s just so funny how everyone was like “it’s not about the Inquisitor” and now that the focus is confirmed to be pretty much entirely on Rook and the inquistor’s choices barely seem to matter in game and half of everybody has lost the plot bc of it and we don’t even actually know how this will affect the game like ????
56 notes · View notes
rewritingcanon · 3 months ago
Text
my sister and i just yapped for almost three hours and we were just talking about how genuinely weird people in fandom are surrounding characters who have explicit mental illness. like they can never ever be normal. there are characters who are romanticised and glamourised for their mental illness (eren. wanda. joker. kaneki. nico. almost any danganronpa/ddlc character). characters who are consistently ridiculed for their mental illness either because it simply isn’t getting taken seriously (reiner) or because no one takes the character seriously (armin). and there are the characters that get blatantly outright DESPISED for it (basil, harry potter, korra, gale, also eren etc etc). like yes im seeing a correlation but its still so astounding how selective people are about where they draw the line with mental illness and what traits they can accept.
64 notes · View notes
carnivalcarriondiscarded · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
another Unnecessary Purchase sorted and jarred!
191 notes · View notes
themintman · 2 months ago
Text
I hate those posts that are like "who remembers this ?? 😝😝" And then it's a clip of mcsm with a burning passion but I saw one earlier that just takes the cake.
"Lukas is the most underrated character in this game" WHO??? LUKAS??? the. The blonde one. The perfect, charming guy that everyone loves. The one who is in 90% of all fanart. The one who is in jesskas, the most popular ship in this fandom. That Lukas???? BITCH ARE YOU STUPID???? DO YOU HAVE A SINGLE CELL IN THAT SMOOTH BRAIN OF YOURS, YOU FUCKING INSECT
40 notes · View notes
screamingwiththewolves · 2 months ago
Text
If the lodgers don't forgive Jekyll, for something that is debatably his own business, then I riot.
42 notes · View notes
flowerflamestars · 4 months ago
Text
Haunted holy and divine snippet
“I’ll bring you something,” Azriel murmured. Allow me, let me, my black stained hands were made for such work. He back away first, before standing, wings melting into shadow to allow her space. “You’re safe here. I promise.” An arched brow, her expression a wound long-festered. “What kind of safe, this time? Should I expect to be drowned, or beaten next?” Azriel had been made to kneel to lesser men his whole long life. There was no resemblance to the gesture when he slid to the ground at Nesta Archeron’s feet, Truthteller unsheathed. Pure and right darkness- it hurt, unexpectedly, her surprise. His blade did not bite, mournful. Azriel slowly, gently, wrangled her shocked still hands, until Nesta understood to wreath his grip in her own. Only then did star steel drink deep. “What are you”- She swallowed the sentence when Azriel raised his head. “I made my vows to Rhain. Rhysand inherited them. Yanked like they were leading strings my whole life. No vow is true without blood.” Black climbed through the silver of her eyes, pupils expanding. She could smell him bleeding. Not a monster, not a human, and not a faery either. “You will be safe,” Azriel whispered, drip of blood an echo, “I will keep you safe.” Nesta swallowed. “Why?” It was a question he deserved, though it made the sting no less. She let him meet her gaze. Stare. Morning skies and endless fire, corpse-pale dead and dreaming blue. Azriel told the truth. He would do nothing less, before her. “Because I cannot stand to do anything else.” “Fine,” Nesta exhaled, temper only in form, “Fine.” She pulled on his hands, as though to raise him. Nesta, who’d been a lady once- did those mortal lords render themselves supplicant for her favor? Had she ever accepted even one? “Rise.” She did not let go. Azriel could not stand without being near, so close the shadows hung still, silenced by Nesta’s gaze flickering over him. Her cold, brittle hands, hooked tight on his soul. A vow he had chosen. A vow he would keep. 
38 notes · View notes
to-be-a-dreamer · 22 days ago
Text
A brain dump of thoughts after Agatha All Along ep 6:
Okay but like. The parallels between Agatha and Billy that we get to see now????
Both of their mothers chose to protect other people, complete strangers, over their own children??? Like. We know Wanda made the right choice, sacrificing her family for the greater good, but in her own twisted way did Evanora believe she was doing the same? Did she ever love her daughter? On some deep level, beneath the anger and hatred and warped sense of justice did it hurt her to try to kill her own child? She believed Agatha would bring countless death and destruction, that she was destined to be evil. As warped as her justifications were did she see it as a selfless sacrifice like Wanda's? Does that make it right? Does Billy have as much reason as Agatha to be angry with his mother for choosing to let him and his brother die? Do her truly selfless intentions matter to a child was just desperate to survive? Will he be able to forgive Wanda before that resentment is used against him? Is Agatha just trying to manipulate him by taunting him about Wanda or does she truly see a bit of herself in a child whose mother tried to kill him? (Edited)
Both of them were forced to do something horrible just to survive??? Agatha had to murder her own family. Billy had to steal the body of a boy who had just died. He had to pretend to be the child of these poor unsuspecting parents who just want their son back. Who have no idea their child is dead. The Kaplans will never get to bury William. He has to look them in the eye every single day knowing he's not really their son but what else was he supposed to do? He hates what he's doing to these people but what choice did he have? Could he even control it or did his soul instinctively seek out a new vessel to protect itself? Agatha was just a child who didn't want to die. Billy was just a child who didn't want to die. Were they selfish? Could they control it? Can we truly blame them if they could?
Both of them do terrible things when they feel backed into a corner or overwhelmed or emotional??? Things that they come to regret as soon as the emotions clear??? Billy looked horrified when he finally realized what he had done to Lilia and Jen but he's an intensely powerful and traumatized child who was overcome with grief and anger. Do we really think every single one of Agatha's kills was 100% self-defense? Do we really think she never killed someone in a fit of anger only to regret it after? And maybe Agatha has come to accept and embrace that now but she must have been like Billy when she was young. (Billy is literally the same age Agatha was when she killed her coven and was even younger when he took William's body) She must have been horrified at her power, at the things she did when she felt trapped. She must have bent over backward trying to defend herself and justify her own actions before realizing no one would believe she didn't want to do those things so she might as well embrace her power to its fullest potential ("I'm not that nice").
Both of them are walking the road for someone they lost??? I know Agatha says she's on the road for her power back but that's not how the road works, right? It doesn't give you what you want it gives you what you're missing. I think if Agatha was really able to get anything at all in the world, it wouldn't be her magic. Agatha is looking for Nicky. Billy is looking for Tommy. I don't know if either of them will really get that at the end but they are absolutely in this for the same reason.
I know there are mixed responses to this episode (at least when I first scrolled through the tag) but I for one really enjoyed it. I was really worried they were going to half-ass the explanation for why Billy was being Like This and fuck up one of the only queer Marvel Comics characters but comparing his actions to Agatha's and showing us this kid who is SO MUCH like how Agatha must have been when she was his age is so much fun actually. Like, it would have been really great but pacing-wise we probably couldn't have spent the necessary time going back into Agatha's past and diving deep into her progression from "scared child who does horrible things out of desperation for survival" to "cutthroat witch who is more than eager to hurt and betray others for her own personal gain". But we get to see it happen to Billy over the rest of the season and maybe even multiple MCU projects!!! Or maybe we'll get to see him make different choices. Maybe Agatha will be able to give him the chance no one gave her. Maybe history doesn't have to repeat itself. Maybe Billy's journey will give Agatha the chance to change her own story once and for all.
Idk this is really rambly and maybe my opinion will change as I think about it more but my first reactions are positive. Yeah on a meta level it sucks that the wlw couple is moving so slowly in their own show while the young, conventionally attractive mlm couple got to kiss within their first few minutes of screentime and they probably could have put in the effort to intentionally combat the miserable lesbians trope. But on a story level, I'm personally glad they're not rushing Agatha and Rio's arc. They're definitely going to get their moment but the reason they're so compelling is because of their history and the tragedy between them. We don't have all the details of what really happened between them yet but I don't think it's something you can just kiss and make up about. Billy and Eddie are teenagers with no real baggage between them. Agatha and Rio have possibly centuries of hurt and anger and betrayal to work through Let Them Cook! It'll be that much sweeter and their relationship is one of the CORE overarching plots of the show you don't want them to rush it. (Also I personally am too ace for the "we're gonna make up by having hot sex about it" type of conflict resolution and would have hated if Agatha and Rio were intimate before sorting at least some of their shit out but that's just me ik a lot of people would have enjoyed it and I'm sure it could have been really compelling but I actually cannot stand those kinds of plots most of the time.)
Also just keep in mind that the only other named queer characters we've had in the MCU literally ever are Phastos and Ben in the Eternals and like. Yeah it shouldn't have taken this long for a queer lead but the massive jump??? We went from one character (out of like ten mains) whose partner has minimal personality traits and like five minutes of screen time to a show with two main character on-screen queer romances!!!! In the Marvel Cinematic Universe??? And one of them is a season-long complex and interesting story that is a central plot of the series and not just half-baked fanservice!!! And one is just sweet innocent love between kids who care about each other!!! I do wish wlw stories didn't always have to come with attractive cis gay men but do y'all understand how huge this is for the MCU????? It shouldn't have taken this long and we can definitely criticize the negative tropes the show falls victim to but net positive progress is always something to be happy about. If you're not familiar with the greater MCU and the history of Marvel in general just understand that this is actually insane for them and I'm so excited for the doors that just opened for future queer storylines, but that can only happen if we show Marvel that, yes we do want queer characters being openly intimate on screen. Be happy for Billy, keep being happy for Agatha and Rio during all stages of their story and maybe we'll get to see more of this!!!
#i am literally gnawing at the walls about billy and agatha they're soooooo yes please give me more of this#yes this is agatha's show and she should be the center of it#yes we needed to see billy's backstory for his character to be fully-formed and to do the comics justice#two things can be true at the same time#again it is really frustrating on a meta level that the wlw couple had to get sidelined for an entire episode on their own show#but i also would have been really mad if they'd butchered such an important queer marvel character as billy kaplan#yes it's a very common trope of the wlw characters always suffering and fighting while the mlm characters just get to be happy#and the writers should be called out for it and we should be upset about it because they really should know better by now#yes billy and eddie are a monumental moment for the mcu and we need to celebrate that#because if they only see us angry about the SECOND EVER QUEER MCU COUPLE they'll use it as an excuse to cut queer storylines in the future#if y'all give them an excuse to think the reason you didn't like billy and eddie was because they're gay#and we get another twenty years of queerbaiting in marvel because yall couldn't be happy about baby steps for once i'm going to start bitin#ALSO ALSO last thing i swear but agatha harkness is not queer in the comics they GAVE us a new wlw relationship PLEASE be happy about that#agatha all along#agatha all along spoilers#agatha harkness#billy maximoff#teen agatha all along#mcu
20 notes · View notes
cchapsticck · 10 months ago
Text
A couple things: 
The first album he ever owned that he got to choose on his own was Master of Reality when Wayne handed him 5 bucks at the used record store after he picked him up from foster. And he’s pretty sure Children of the Grave changed his brain chemistry. Like something in him got hard re-wired and soldered in place. Like there’s no unfixing that fix.
The first song he ever learned to play on Wayne’s old beater acoustic was Here Comes The Sun, but if anyone asks he says it was Smoke on the Water, which was actually second but the truth is possibly humiliating, considering his curated reputation.
He cannot read music. Which is funny, considering he’s had a “band” since 7th grade. He just kind of picks at shit by ear. Which he’s pretty good at, thank you very much. It's why he likes shit with solos, he can pick out a riff better than he can pick out a chord progression.
Said band did not lock down members with any kind of permanence until 10th and no one had any kind of electrified instrument until 11th because Jeff and Phil and Gareth might be better off than he is - drug money notwithstanding - but tuns out parents aren’t keen to just drop that kind of money so one’s kid can fuck around in another kid’s garage every couple weekends for that kind of price tag
Metal shows are few and far between in Roane County, considering all the ways it is. But the couple no-name bands that have breezed through town at the dive-iest of bars the county has to offer well - he doesn’t want to say, changed his life but - but he’s never been so glad to have been elbowed in the face because everyone’s having a good fucking time and without the accompanying “faggot” attached to the act, which he’s had a repeat performance of just. Generally. In his life outside of the shittest bars in Indiana.  
He’s not saying Zepplin II made him gay but Robert Plant’s face pasted onto that German soldier’s body made him feel some kind of way at a formative age and that’s maybe just something he’s going to take to the grave even if apparently the shittiest of shitheads just decided that was a true thing about him on their own.
Steve Harrington has been hot since, like, junior high. Which is horseshit. Because like, first of all. He sucks. Like, he’s a douche. But Barb Holland died and he ended up in the hospital because apparently those two things are related events and rumor has it he got kicked out of his house and he shaved his head about it and there are a shocking number of scars hidden under that disco hair and that, unfortunately, does not make him less hot or less of a douche. 
Another thing: Dustin Henderson is fucking annoying. Like annoying in the unremarkable way all nerds are annoying that he’s a little dead to (like sometimes he catches himself mid-tirade and thinks ‘damn, I’d kick my ass too’) so he gets it but also. He’s fucking annoying. He’s fucking annoying about Steve Harrington in particular which like. Hilarious. Go figure. 
And he’s got a lot of annoying ammunition in that particular annoying gun, because apparently Harrington’s been living in his basement. So the kicked out thing is probably true. A lot of what he’s got to say is anecdotal. Lives in the basement. Pays rent. Makes dinner for Henderson’s mom. Drives him to school. Owns a bat with nails in it? Which. Alright? That makes about as much sense as anything else going on. The weirdly dense law enforcement presence in the wake of the Holland murder (and those are feds, like, he knows cops, he grew up around a lot of cops - thanks Dad - these are not cops) and the ever evolving whatever-this-is of Steve Harrington which he is for sure paying a normal amount of attention to and not unloading his guts at Gareth and Jeff who for sure don’t want to kick his ass about it because are we all seeing this shit? It's been like 5 years of high school and this is a puzzle he is no closer to solving, as he is no closer to graduating. And it's not because he’s being a dipshit about Harrington’s gradual transformation no matter what Gareth keeps insisting. (he’s being a dipshit about graduating because he’s a dipshit - separate problem)
But like, something is for sure going on with Steve Harrington. And fuck him dead because he is desperate to pick it apart. It's got nothing to do with the horny goblin in his brain barking about the, shall we say, aesthetic realignment here (which maybe, like, is coming for the integrity of his own genre cred but like. Come on, man.) and it's got everything to do with someone like Steve Fucking Harrington willfully abdicating the throne to throw himself amongst the Maligned With Problems The World Will Make Your Fault. Like he had to have known the flavor of hell people like him and Hagan and every other one of those silver spoon fucks made of his life. And not just his, just like, anyone remotely adjacent in the social order. 
There’s this kind of unspoken truth at shows. Like metal, hardcore, whatever, any genre within a genre that fills up bars like this, like he’s pretty sure the punks even have this rule, this remains true: the more normal the guy looks the more fucked in the head he is. That guy is dangerous. That guy is working through some shit you cannot even begin to conceive of and this is only outlet he’s got. Like that guy will straight murder you if you come at him wrong in a pit and everyone knows it. You do not fuck with that guy. You do not make eye contact with that guy. So Steve Harrington in his tightass Levi’s and bright white fresh out the 3-pack t-shirt hugging the back wall of the Hideout on a Thursday night sure is a red flag. But red’s always been his favorite color, so-
So he buries his shoulder blades in the wall right next to him and hits him with a of all the gin joints and Steve just squints at him like he’s got no fucking clue what he’s talking about. Figures. Harrington always seemed like a philistine. Steve just runs his hand over his shaved short head, and Eddie swears he can hear the rasp of Steve’s palm over the noise of the bar. 
“You come here often?” And it's not not a come on and he’s a little prepared to get decked but it's also a genuine question. 
“It’s work.” Steve says, not unkindly but not really looking at him either. Like he’s not really interested in the conversation or Eddie at all.
“It’s work?”
And that gets Steve looking and he does not look impressed. It's cute. Which probably says more about Eddie’s ability to turn disdain into some semblance of private affection but we’re not going to unpack that bag we’re just going to throw the whole suitcase out. 
“Well, I can’t work the bar so I just pull people out of the pit. Work the door sometimes.” Steve says over the noise of the bar, by way of explanation.
“How about that?” he says with no small amount of genuine awe. “Mall work not cutting it for you, then?”
Steve just kind of one shoulder shrugs. Not cutting it in the sense that the mall like, fuckin’ burned down but. Y’know. Speaking in kind of a general hypothetical kind of way. Looking for a new career path kind of way. Less about the mall directly. Or at all. 
“Yes and no. I got punched less by skinheads at the mall.” and that almost sounds like a joke, like Harrington isn’t totally hating this conversation. Delightful. 
“And you’d willingly go into this line of work when Henderson says you can’t win a fight?” he says it like he means it, like he’s actually surprised. Because he is. Because getting laid out at a show is just some shit that happens sometimes. Assholes with something to prove, the wrong guy took an elbow at the wrong time, a drunk got in the pit and doesn’t know the difference between a good time and a fight, like, shit happens. 
Steve’s scrunched up face of repulsion and offense is additionally cute. 
“Yeah well, Henderson says a lot of shit about you too.” 
He may have been operating on the assumption that Steve actually had no idea who he was. And was just some weird guy who, for some reason, had a lot of personal information about him that was in no way reciprocated. Just kind of figured he would have been beneath Harrington’s notice in a big picture kind of way. 
Fuck you, Henderson, how dare you. 
“Only glowing reviews, I’m sure.”
“More or less.”
Alright he’ll take back point two, then. You’re on thin ice, Henderson. 
“Is that where the uh-” and he kind of gestures limply at the pit and then towards the thick, formerly stapled up scarring in Steve’s hairline. Like he’s come home from a show with a bloody nose or a black eye or two but nothing like that.
“No.”
It's the finality in his tone, when he says it that makes him suspect he’s fucked this up and the conversation is over.
And it is. 
So he hangs around the bar for the set and then he leaves and its not really all that interesting. 
But he thinks about that for a while, that something rattled Steve Harrington’s cage so hard he’s this now. Somewhere in the realm of quietly fucked up, and on the edges of good sensibility and good taste because its more comfortable out of a spotlight. Even if the dark on the edge of that pool of light is more than a little dangerous, but at least there’s a place to hide. 
And then Chrissy Cunningham dies on his ceiling and he has to keep hiding.  
72 notes · View notes
tetzoro · 2 months ago
Text
goooood morning and happy friday friendz !!!! we made it to the end of the week heheheee i hope today is a wonderful start to your weekend !! yipeee !! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و
Tumblr media
25 notes · View notes
morallygreykoifsh · 1 year ago
Text
So little au idea for HoTD hear me out...we give alicent a medieval nuke(a dragon)...but not in a Targaryen!Alicent or Valyrian!Alicent way but a Canon divergence way where completely hightower Alicent claims a dragon..!
Like a concept that my 3 braincells fist-fought in a Danny's parking lot for- anyway as I was saying imagine for whatever reason maybe for Aegon and Helaenas wedding
For whatever reason the family goes to dragonstone and Alicent gets more than a little stressed out during the welcoming feast (Viserys,Aegon,Rhaenyra,Daemon one or all of them are probably a factor to her frustration lets be honest) and so she retires and asks Criston to watch over the children because of where they are is dangerous, and she walks towards her chambers but ends up outside on the beach and just strolls along the sand eventually taking a break and sitting on the ground for a bit...and ends up dozing off
Eventually realizing the sun is rising and deciding to go back to the keep before the day breaks only to feel like shes being watched/stared at, she starts to hear and feel breathing she turns around and boom a giant dragon right there watching her mouth covered in blood and flesh(human?) and her fight or flight kicks in but she freezes and the dragon gets closer and closer soon fave to face with her
It nudges her and when she doesn't respond it picks her up by the back of her dress and puts her on its back. And when she snaps out of it she realizes what it did and a different fear overtakes her as the dragon lifts off the ground taking her with it, she of course holds on for dear life and is screaming in terror bowing her head on its neck as it soars
Unconsciously she brings it towards the keep and maybe lifts her head as it flies over the bridge and whoops with joy...she just got abducted and is now a dragonrider whether she likes it or not this dragon picked her up and went 'Ohhh ur mine now little dude lol' and when it lands in a field close to the keep and her family comes rushing to her asking if she's okay and what happened? where was she? was she just riding a dragon by herself? what the fuck? The dragon meanwhile looms menacingly behind her as she answers their questions
Vizzy T,Rhaenyra and Daem*n come to them rhae rhae scared daem#n pissed and disgusted and Viserys just confused why the duck alicent could claim a dragon
(Yada Yada non Targaryens can't claim dragons Yada Yada why would a whore like her be able to ride a dragon) -darmon probably
129 notes · View notes
whump-captain · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media
A summoning won't succeed if the vessel is not empty
[ID in alt, click for better quality]
85 notes · View notes
koicrimes · 2 months ago
Text
i think if you think someone is a bad person simply because they view/portray a character differently than you do, you need to take your ass outside and talk to real people. this is ESPECIALLY true when yall know that you're almost entirely projecting who YOU are as in individual onto these characters. you cannot expect people to portray a character as you with better hair-- none of us know each other. we're all strangers. your story- the one you use to try and force parallels with your fave- is nonexistent as far as the next person is concerned.
im not saying there's anything wrong with projecting on to your faves. TONS of people do it-- which is why, you're not always going to find people who view the character the exact same way you want them to. because their projection looks different from your projection.
if you want a character to be portrayed exactly like you want them to, if you want a character that shares your likeness (whatever that means to you) create your own original character. no one can "take that away from you" because it's your own creation and you dictate what's true or not.
everything else is all entirely up to the individual's interpretation that's consuming the media, same as you.
9 notes · View notes
spectrumgarden · 7 months ago
Text
Okay so I've never really joined the whole "small talk" argument that's been happening increasingly over the last years because I tend to just not agree with anyone I see discuss it. Like no I dont think people who use it are evil or making things hard on purpose, I also dont think it makes them lesser, ... I Also dont think that someone who refuses to use it / cant use it is automatically worse and will not make friends.
Importantly i also dont think everyone can learn it. I should know because I spent multiple years with professionals trying to teach me how to have a conversation At All and I still am actually nowhere near what would be expected at my age group. (Most recent reports usually go something like "makes slight improvements in having a two sided conversation" - because I can say nothing, or I can ramble on and then not react to your answer. The rest? Struggle time, to this day, in every aspect) No matter how many intricate guides you write, if I fail at the basic concept of a conversational structure very frequently then I will not succeed at small talk either. And additionally I also genuinely can not tell what might be too personal for this other person.
A lot of these people who get upset when people say "I cant do small talk because I'm autistic and I cant learn it, I tried and failed" and go "of course you can!", just sort of like. Ignore that a lot of the developmental delay in conversation and / or (nonverbal) language never closes up for many of us, the way a lot of us generally never reach the developmental level of our peers (in some areas). and it's not because we have not seen enough complex flow charts or not practiced enough. when so many of us literally spend so much additional time of our youth sitting in front of whiteboards and workbooks and such, being explained over and over how to talk to someone at all. I am 22 and after years of explicit teaching I still have to ask for verbal confirmation and explanation of any nonverbal cues that I think were used by my conversational partner, but do not know what they mean. Which is pretty much all of them. And I probably miss a lot of them existing at all. You can scream "just practice until you can recognize the other persons little cues on if they want to deepen or end this" until you turn blue but it will not actually make me accomplish it if the fucking people who've been spending their whole life teaching it didnt make me figure it out. On account of, you know, the developmental delay.
Sure some people can learn! That's why they try to teach us after all! Cause it has been successful! But generally stop with this shit of "everyone can learn this you're just choosing not to!"
I will never be rude to someone for engaging in small talk, I will obviously fail at their attempts to engage me in some, which usually makes them stop trying (thank god). But I will not tolerate others talking shit about it that is uncalled for (implying malice from every user, making fun of people who seem to crave it, ...).
But I also do not care to learn it anymore at this point? It's no goal of mine. I have made multiple friends, most non autistic, without ever using small talk. Including in adulthood. We simply skipped that stage. We went from "hi!" "Hi!" Immediately to "heres when it went wrong in my life (humorous but still often dark / personal). Also these are my political opinions. Sure I want to hear about the girl you dated for years in excruciating detail. Let me retell you the plot of this old indie movie you will never watch for 20 minutes and why I enjoy it. Let's go to a concert together after talking slightly in depth like this twice". Is this the way that you creep everyone out in everyone's friendship acquisition theory I've been seeing? Sure! It's been working perfectly fine, enough of the times for me, though.
Will this work in like a work environment or something? Most likely not, which is why I generally plan to keep to myself. Does this mean I still confuse every stranger who approaches me trying to small talk? Sure. that's why I'm still fucking disabled. But I have created meaningful relationships as an adult without small talk. I have genuinely tried learning in many ways and failed. And I'm done apologizing for that, either you take me with my inability to small talk or you wont.
23 notes · View notes
andreal831 · 24 days ago
Note
Your opinion on Bamon?
Tumblr media
I'm just knocking all of these out.
Like most of Damon friendships/romances, it's just not my cup of tea.
I do think Bonnie is one of the few people Damon truly cared for and was the only person he actually changed for.
That being said, he was still terrible to her.
Damon is one of those men that can be a good friend but once you put him into a romantic relationship, he's terrible. And saying Damon is ever a good friend is a stretch. We never once see Damon be a good romantic partner. He is possessive and controlling, yet always putting himself and his desires first. He is even that way with Bonnie in their friendship.
Damon has a bunch of his own issues so he throws himself completely into love to the point of it being scary and dangerous. He loves so fully that he no longer leaves space for the person he loves because he is so desperate for someone to love him. He no longer cares to respect their wishes or autonomy because he feels he knows better and that he is the only person that could possibly keep them safe. This is narcissism and abusive. Not love.
Their Season 6 friendship was good, but it was only possible because Damon was isolated from everyone else. Damon is only able to be a decent person in small doses or in a vacuum. But when things get complicated, he can't maintain it. We see this pattern play out in various scenarios.
We finally got to see some growth with Damon when he saves Bonnie multiple times when I saw sure he wouldn't. I actually thought they were going to improve his character. Bonnie is probably the only person that Damon actually works to save. Like put in actual work. Even with Stefan, he was quick to give up if there wasn't a simple solution. Their reunion after the prison world was sweet.
But then he forces her to see Kai after she nearly killed herself because of Kai, while he was one of the few people to truly know what Kai did to her. But again, we see some growth when he actually apologizes (I don't think he's ever done that) and when she tells him to leave, he actually listens (another first, also the fact that he didn't go on a murder rampage is an improvement). Then Bonnie just magically gets better and Damon is able to forget about it. Damon falls back into the same old habits of only communicating with Bonnie when he needs something. The prison world was the exception, not the rule.
I like that there are moments Damon actively chooses to save Bonnie, knowing it will prevent him from seeing Elena, but what is that worth when he leaves Bonnie with a note knowing that he would never see her again all because he missed Elena. Bonnie was devastated that she wasn't even worth a goodbye. But Damon was never good at the difficult emotions. Even with as much as he cared for Bonnie, he was not capable of being a good friend, let a lone a good romantic partner. If they could have lived in a prison world where nothing difficult happened, sure they could work. But Damon, in reality, would always take the easy way out and end up hurting Bonnie over and over again.
Damon didn't need to be in a relationship. He needed to learn to be on his own and value the other relationships in his life just as much as he valued his romantic relationships.
And no, this isn't a "Bonnie deserves better than toxic men" post. I mean she does. But even if Damon was just toxic to everyone else, I could get behind it. But Damon is also awful to her. Just less so than he is to everyone else. Bonnie had to constantly worry that Damon would betray her or choose Stefan or Elena over her. She never felt secured in their friendship because Damon was never able to value her over or even equal to Stefan and Elena. He was obsessed with them. Just as he had been obsessed with Katherine for nearly 200 years.
Thanks for the ask!
12 notes · View notes