#like what do you mean ew
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
( fucking Astarion saying his idea of fun is sex and literally goes “no with you, ew, can you imagine??” Thanks bud 💀 )
#[chaos mode]&ooc#my girl is fucking hot tho#like what do you mean ew#I’m glad this isn’t my astarion romance pt 😂#At least gale appreciates me#even if he’s talking about fucking his goddess in casual convo with me lmao
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
i think im not a fan of what dc keeps doing with jason because they keep having him, the abused, become an abuser in some way shape or form. and the classism they don't want to talk about (i am being so for real there is a genuine problem of both writers and readers who do not understand jason's background and it pissed me off so bad because it always shapes their opinion of him in the wrong way and they don't care to even try to listen). and how if they were going to have him come back they should have had delved into his identity crisis and the inherent horror of coming back but not knowing how or why or what to do about it and not knowing what you were doing while dead and having to deal with time jumping forward on you and the fact that you will never get the time back and no one will he the same as they were before you died and how isolating and lonely that would be. and they also definitely weren't prepared for the fact that jason was grieving his life and his death and his hopes for his mother and his dad who didn't get there in time and the dc writers are fucking cowards. which brings me to my next point: why do we keep listening to them about shit because they are quite literally always fighting with each other and projecting their own personal biases into characters (i.e. making them worse than they are/2 dimensional/trying to make them iredeemable so their favorite character gets to shine) and also they are all freaks of nature with a consistent problem of being God Awful People who why would we trust them with these characters. jason todd they don't get you like i do
#it's 3AM and i woke up out of a fitful sleep to write this post#i hallucinated jason todd while trying to sleep#(just like them bitches in the comics always fucking do can we point that out. actually. they always fucking hallucinate someone in their#family but mostly jason. when he was dead and stuff#more hallucinations or give me death#i meant that figuratively#the second part#i want more hallucinations or give me someone talking about how that used to happen to them and jason going “wtf r u good ?” or#“ew keep me out of your brain freak”#(second one directed at tim)#what was i saying#ummmm#jason todd#he deserves better#coming from a similar background means i am his number one defender#i have mommy issues too so tack that on there#the way people look at and treat the homeless makes me infuriated because you dont get it#you dont GET IT#until it's YOU mother fucker
350 notes
·
View notes
Text
Nikki Vee in It's What's Inside
#it's what's inside spoilers#it's what's inside#she is so fuckin good in this like I really can't#i mean they all are really#and yes you do have to watch her kiss a guy but alshsjalskl#it's more cringy than anything and I think it was meant to be?#that I'm just gay idk but sam and I both but went ew and then burst out laughing while cringing#ok I'm actually going to bed cuz I'm gonna be draggin ass so hard tomorrow#someone with better editing skills please grab nicer shots of these#for science#alycia debnam carey
196 notes
·
View notes
Text
pirate au??
PIRATE AU!!!!!
@prettyswellaus has an accurate username. those are some pretty swell aus!!!!
have YOU ever tried creating a criminal organization by yourself?? its harder than you think!!!!!
#I DID IT. I DID A FANART. HIYAH!!!!!#what do you mean this is like. 50% original material#it counts#mmmmmmmm thinking about leviathan tom.#GASP AND SIREN MATT..... HANG ON#okay im just fucking making my own au at this point whoopsie <3#piratesworld au#still tagging it tho. bc as far as i know this is canon compliant#my art#eddsworld#sketch#ew tom#ew edd#ew tord#eddsworld au#comic
170 notes
·
View notes
Text
☆ even the gods bleed [ pt 4 ]
{☆} characters arlecchino, furina, lyney {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, multi-chapter, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings blood {☆} word count 3.7k {☆} previous [ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ]
Fontaine was bathed in darkness, not even the moon daring to illuminate where the common man fears to walk. The streets were bleak and empty save for the constant, rhythmic ticking and clanking of machines marching on endlessly, dauntlessly wading where even the bravest dared not to venture. Not even the sharp click of the Gardes boots followed the occasional hisses of steam as they walked the barren streets.
It was haunting, and it'd been like that for days now. It showed little signs of stalling in the slightest, too. Every inch of Fontaine was practically crawling with Gardemeks– like a swarm of rats skittering about.
Arlecchino had secluded herself in the Hotel Bouffes d'ete for days at this point, waiting– biding her time. Her nails clicked against the wood as she tapped at the table in a stilted rhythm, the subtle click of the clock mixing into the clanking outside, weaving in and out of earshot as the patrols slipped by. She reached forward after a moment of thought, reaching for the white king.
She leaned back against the chaise, tilting her head just enough to catch a glimpse of a patrol of Gardemeks as they vanished behind the rows and rows of buildings. It wasn't enough to keep her attention for long, however, her features twisting in disinterest as she glanced back to the chessboard– and the letter neatly resting beside it. The seal was unmistakable and a sobering sight, demanding her attention– the soft hues of blue etched into the shape of a dragon stared back at her in a way that almost unsettled her.
She had already parsed through it's contents hundreds of times, but she was met with only vague, flowing script that only served to irritate her more then anything– it filled the page top to bottom yet managed to say nothing at all. Her hand reached out again, but instead of reaching for the letter she plucked the black rook from the board, setting it down with a soft click.
Arlecchino had all the time in the world to sit back and observe her prey, but all that time would be useless if she lacked the information to act.
And he was quite tight fisted about it, evidentially. None of her inquiries or attempts to decipher any potential codes in the letter left her empty handed. She could not act without even knowing the reason for his summons– it was almost worded like a personal affair rather then one would expect for a foreign diplomat. In truth, she'd expected a scalding report on her operatives, but it lacked any mention of anything of the sort.
She was no stranger to people masking hostility behind pretty words and compliments, not that it was ever unwarranted per se– the Fatui did not create connections through honesty and genuine kindness. They have strong armed more then their fair share of people into cooperation to the point distrust is all the Fatui are met with outside of Snezhnaya. Every word was meant to conceal the deceit, every action meant to conceal the price later paid.
So she had been..skeptical of the letter, to put it lightly. She doubted the Iudex of all people would offer a hand to the Fatui without a price attached– a trap, perhaps, meant to lure in the most powerful piece left on the board. Her eyes narrowed, reaching for a white rook and moving it to the right.
Or he was hiding something. Something that he simply couldn't risk getting out to anyone, not even the Divine themself. A tempting prize, whatever it was.
..A dangerous prize, too.
She'd considered burning the letter and forgetting it all together– the risk was great, and she couldn't risk getting caught up by whoever else the Iudex may have on his side of the board. But she could hardly pass up the challenge and the prize that he fought so hard to keep from prying eyes and ears. Even her agents came back empty handed each time. She lazily picked up a black rook, sliding the white pawn aside.
"Lyney," Arlecchino drawled, crossing one leg over the other and turning her gaze to the door as it slowly creaked open. The pale visage of Lyney stepped through, though his siblings were noticeably absent. The weariness that weighed down on his shoulders was apparent in the slightest furrow of his brows and the subtle creak of leather as he clenched his fists behind his back. "Father." He choked out, the title dragged out by the sharp inhale and shaky exhale.
He looked out of breath, she noted.
The silence that lingered after the small exchange was punctuated only by the click of another chess piece being moved. She sets aside the black rook, letting it sit among the dozen other pieces that had been wiped off the board. She can see the conviction glinting beneath the fog of exhaustion, but if he would utilize it was another matter all together.
He had seemed to make his choice quickly, at the very least.
"Our contacts and operatives within the Fortress of Meropide have gone silent– all we have is their final confirmed missive.." His voice is confident, but it is rigid as the words spill from his lips. He takes a sharp step forward, unfolding his arms from behind his back and opening his hands– the small, water stained and messily folded note catches her eye, plucking it from his palms with a half hearted interest. "They believe the Duke left the Fortress of Meropide..and that he may be coming to the Court of Fontaine."
Her eyes narrow dangerously, nearly crumpling the thin paper in her hands– yet just as quickly, she collects herself.
But she cannot get rid of the bitter taste on her tongue, lingering as she sets down the note and slides it to the side, her lips pursed into a thin line.
So the Iudex had shown one of his pieces..she tightly grasps a black rook, tipping over the white rook, letting it roll against the board.
If the Duke was involved, things were much more complicated then she expected– he would be a problem, she was certain. She couldn't blame the lamb for fearing the wolf, either. Whether her agents had been killed or captured by the man mattered little. He had his ways, and he was a force that could instill fear in even them.
Which meant the possibility that her operation was already compromised was far too real.
What had the Iudex so concerned he had gone through the trouble of bringing in the Duke and herself? The Fatui was one thing, but to specifically request one of it's Harbingers..
The Prophecy? The thought had her clenching her fist, but..no. If it were to rear it's head now, the Iudex could simply not afford to waste time on his contacts deciphering his nonsensical script– If the prophecy were to be the issue, there time would be limited to mere minutes in the worst of cases. Which meant it was worth biding his time in order to ensure absolute secrecy.
So if not the prophecy, then what?
Her next moves were..limited. She was already walking on eggshells considering her position and the reputations of the Fatui– especially with a Harbinger in the midst. If they caught wind of her operations, they'd weed out her operatives and be on guards for any snakes that lingered in their garden.
She reached for the chessboard again, picking up one of the white rooks from the board with a scowl. The sharp click as she sets down the white rook and sets aside the black pawn draws a shaky inhale from Lyney as she moves another black pawn, the dull click of the pieces drowning out the distant clinking of machines.
..A draw, perhaps.
The pieces were all falling into place– the players of this game were slowly being revealed. Whether she could secure her victory..she was unsure.
She wasn't even sure who her opponent was. Only that the Iudex himself was but another piece in their game.
Arlecchino reached for the board again, yet this time she hesitated. Perhaps she could still swipe the win from beneath them, if she played her cards right.
She would simply have to capture the king– or, if need be, let it end on a draw. Either way, she would not concede. She could not afford to concede. Down to the last piece, she would drag out this match until she was in a position to force their hand into the outcome she desired.
She stood slowly, picking up the king piece and observing it for only the briefest of moments before she set it down on the table, taking measured steps around the table and across the room. She was hunting a much more dangerous quarry today– it would be no simple runaway traitor this time.
"Do you remember the directive?" She inquired coldly, her hand lingering on the door for that long, tense moment. "..Yes, Father." Lyney faltered, taking a hesitant step back and bowing at the waist. "Then do not stray."
All that was left was the silence and click of the door shutting behind her as she disappeared down the hall, her boots clicking harshly against the floorboards. The rest of the agents knew better then to linger in her path as she stepped down into the lobby, adjusting the cuffs of her sleeves. She barely even acknowledged the Fatui agent standing at the ready by the heavyset doors, their gloves hands held out with her cloak held loosely in their palms. She quickly snagged it from them, tugging it over her board shoulders and clasping it around her throat.
With a quick tug, she brought the hood up over her head to conceal her sharp features, lifting her hand and placing a neatly folded note within their waiting hands. She had only one chance to make the right moves and secure her victory– no matter the cost.
Each piece had it's purpose.
Oft, that purpose was a bloody and horrible end– but for the grand goal of the Fatui built on the backs of the dead, it was an honor.
She didn't bother speaking a word as she dismissed them with a wave of her hand, pushing open the heavyset doors and stepping out into the barren, damp streets. The rhythmic clink and whir of Gardemeks was still distant– she needed to move. Her boots clicked and splashed in the rain soaked stone of the streets as she slithered between the buildings, ducking through the openings in the patrols.
It was almost too easy.
She tilted her head back, taking in the towering Palais Mermonia with a scowl, her hands clenched into fists. The final moves were being played– the king was within her reach, yet she felt no more confident then when she began.
The air carried a sense of unease, thick and heavy, filling her lungs until she felt her breath still in her chest– listening to the empty, bleak night that seemed so..quiet.
She'd done her fair share of research, had more then her fair share of her agents try to peer into the Iudex's office or the Archon's supposedly hidden chambers, but every attempt was a failure. She had to give them credit, they were quite elusive when they wished to be. Though now she only thought about it bitterly– this was all a risky gamble, in the end, and only time would tell if it paid off.
With minimal effort, she'd managed to pull herself to the flat, tiled roof, eyeing the massive tower peaking out of the center cautiously. At least here the wandering patrols down below weren't likely to notice her..she could hear them passing by the spot she'd been in only a few minutes ago, just beneath her. She pulled the hood further over her face, peering through the sheer darkness of the night for any oddities, but it was almost impossible to see in the dark.
Her boots clicked softly against the tiles as she approached the tower jutting out from the Palais, her hand gliding along the smooth stone, pressing against odd indents or crevices. If it was for the Archon's chambers, she doubted they made it very difficult– she'd only met the woman once, but she doubted the Iudex make it all that complex just from a brief glance. And it surprised her little when one of the stones sunk into the wall, gears whirring as the walls split open to reveal a stairwell straight into an inky black hall. Only the barest hint of light peaked under the door at the bottom, but it's occupants must have heard her, considering it went out not a moment later.
She cautiously stepped down into the small crevice, her breath visible in the bitter cold air– her shoulders tensed at the subtle sound of muffled footsteps behind the door, her vision flaring with a molten heat between her shoulder blades as she reached for the worn handle of the door. The heat of her vision was enough to just barely heat the metal, her vision flaring like a quickly building inferno.
Arlecchino was prepared for a fight, if it came down to it.
The door creaked as she pressed against it, shoving it open with a grunt of effort and surveying the room with narrowed eyes and a biting remark on the tip of her tongue– the lavish opulence was expected, she supposed, but the lack of the towering figure of the Iudex was not.
Yet before she could get a word in or even take in her surroundings properly, the light flickered back on and she had to squeeze her eyes shut with a hiss at the sudden brightness. She could hear the door being shoved closed behind her, the hurried footsteps retreating just as quickly as her eyes adjusted to the light.
..This was a joke, wasn't it? It had to be.
She'd expected the Iudex, perhaps even the Duke if she'd been unlucky, not the Hydro Archon. She had half the mind to test her worth as an Archon then and there, her temper flaring like an uncontrollable blaze, barely kept at bay. It took all her self control to force herself to smile politely at the woman rather then snarl.
"Miss Furina," She sneered beneath her hood, x shaped pupils locked onto the startled, trembling Archon with thinly veiled contempt. "What a..pleasant surprise. You'll have to forgive my manners, I assumed I was meeting with the Iudex." She observed her body language carefully– the way her eyes darted about like a frightened rabbit seeking escape, the slightest tremble of her lips..
Arlecchino opened her mouth to offer another scathing remark, but her jaw audibly clicked shut as her entire body seemed to lock up. Even her vision went cold against her back, a chilling feeling creeping up her spine as someone, or something, crept up behind her. Their footsteps were almost silent, the slight rustling of their clothes the only thing she could hear over her heart pounding against her ribcage.
Arlecchino had always prided herself on being on the other end of that sensation– she was the monster, and her target was the prey frozen like a deer between the hunters crosshair.
It was a chilling feeling to have the dynamic shifted on it's head.
She couldn't even swallow, her jaw clenched so hard she could hear it creak as she tried to reason with her quickly splintering mind– a futile effort, her joints locking up almost painfully. Black spots were quickly swallowing her vision from the lack of air in her lungs, the sound of shuffling behind her barely audible over the ringing in her ears.
For a moment – a moment too long to have only lasted the seconds that it did, yet so quick it gave her whiplash – she thought she would hit the floor dead before she could even glimpse her assailant.
And then it was gone. She came crashing back into reality with a startled inhale, her lungs burning and her knees nearly buckling under her. The instinct to lash out and kill whoever had done it was intense, yet she couldn't bring herself to move even a finger– it would be so easy to twist around and ignite them with searing flames, but her feet were rooted in place.
She almost didn't notice the surprisingly gentle hands unclasping her cloak, tugging it off her shoulders, if not for the sheer intensity of the presence still lingering behind her. Her mind was still fractured, struggling to right itself after the ordeal, and it had her seething.
"..Are you certain you held back enough?" Furina croaked, the normally soft lilt raspy and almost hoarse. "Not– not that I doubt your capability, most Divine!"
Arlecchino felt her nails dig harshly into her palms, heat swelling beneath her skin– Divine? Had she lost her mind? The Divine was..
The Divine was upon their throne where they belonged. She'd seen them!
"Hm. Well, maybe? Sorry, I didn't think it'd affect you too." Their voice was sickeningly soft as they stepped around her like she wasn't even there, focusing their attention on the Archon who seemed more then delighted about it. "What gave you that impression, most Divine? Aha, I..was completely unaffected, as you can see! Perfectly fine."
Furina let out a small squeak when they pinched her cheek, but the almost affectionate smile that tugged at their lips revealed the lack of malice behind the action.
"You're a bad liar, Furina. You might want to sit down..please?" They didn't take her protests for an answer, gently pushing her to sit on the bed before abruptly turning to face Arlecchino once more, a forced smile on their lips. "Oh, good, you're..uh, not dead. That's good. I thought I fried your brain. Sorry?"
..Had she hit her head on the way here? The Divine should still be on their throne, yet she couldn't shake the weight of their stare– it felt tangible. She felt like she was standing face to face with the stars– galaxies and constellations bearing down upon her.
She grit her teeth and clenched her hands until she felt the sting of her nails against her palms, grounding herself in the pain through the sheer overwhelming nature of their existence.
"You.." She croaks, reaching out with a shaky hand and grabbing them by the collar of their shirt, lifting them up until their feet left the floor– she pays no mind to the startled protests of the Archon. Arlecchino would crush her like a bug before she even got the chance to intervene and they both knew it. "You shouldn't exist– you aren't them, and yet you..you're the imposter, aren't you?" Her grip tightens yet they face her without an ounce of fear, meeting her unyielding glare with a pondering look.
Arlecchino wanted to make them bleed just to see if she could, the urge to sink her teeth into skin welling up in her chest to the point she visibly snarled, her mask of politeness long . "You're the imposter." Her expression falls for a moment before she schools it into one of apathy, setting them back down and holding them there for a moment, finally releasing them after a tense moment. "Or you were supposed to be."
Hers brows furrow– she wants to demand answers, to throttle them for damning them to being nothing more then dolls for the supposed Divine to break at their whim, but none of the words come to her.
"..Why now? The current Divine has been in power for years, yet you descend now?" Her shoulders tensed, lips pursed into a thin line– it's impossible to ignore the truth that lay before her. The Divine is a fraud and this..imposter is the true Divine. How many years had they been in power, now? How many years were they waiting? Why did they wait? Was the suffering of Teyvat not enough? Was the blood that painted the steps of their stolen throne not enough?
She'd personally been on the wrong end of the Divine's wrath– she wonders..had they watched? Had they seen the cruel hand of their imposter and turned their back on Teyvat?
"I.." They hesitated. It made her seethe, her hands clenching into fists at her sides– her vision flickered, flames swelling within it's casing just to be smothered by the presence of the Divine. But once that spark had been lit, she refused to let it go out. "I didn't know."
The answer does not satisfy her. There is an itch beneath her skin that she cannot scratch, a fire that burns in her chest so hot it scorches even herself.
"And what about now? Are you content to cower like prey in the safety of the Palais Mermonia?" She snapped, taking a step forward, her brows furrowed and her glare intense– she can see the slightest bit of worry in their eyes. She revels in it. "Will you let them use your acolytes like pawns? How many more need to be broken on the steps to your throne before you act?"
Again, her vision flares and dims– it refuses to be used against the Divine that created it.
"Have you no answer?"
The room is silent. They do not speak and neither does she.
Even the world itself seems to quiet in the face of her accusations, fury boiling to the surface so hot it incinerated all it touched.
"I will kill them myself."
Their words are quiet, but they are not soft– there is a vindictive, searing anger that explodes out like dying stars within their eyes. The sight of constellations replaced by a void that would not be . The smell of ichor grows stronger– to the point she feels almost lightheaded.
"..I am aware that I have failed in preventing this, but I had no choice in the matter. Still," They muse, their voice like the tolling of bells. A solemn melody that stills the swelling fury burning in her chest, if only for a moment. "I will rectify it– I will tear down their throne of lies and let not even the earth tarnish itself by burying their corpse among it's soil."
They pause for a moment, holding out their hand– scarred and bandaged by the weapons of the devout, yet still they take upon the burden of dirtying their hands to save those who did not save them.
"Do you trust me, Arlecchino?"
Did she?
"Will you help me?"
She exhales heavily, meeting the starry iris' of the Divine with a scowl still tugging at her lips. Arlecchino trusted no one but herself.
"..Yes."
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#fic tag#imposter au#genshin cult au#genshin impact cult au#arlecchino#lyney#furina#you do NOT wanna know what i got put thru writing this fic#trying 2 find out where arle was in the few times we DO see her and going down a rabbit hole of fuck fontaine and its layout actually!#I spent like 3 hours looking it up and checking in game it gives me a migraine thinking abt it. ew#anyway trying to write a really smart character is surprisingly difficult when ur as dumb as rocks#also used an actual chess match for this and gave myself an even worse migraine trying 2 make sure i didnt repeat moves or smth#furina doesnt get a spotlight yet just imagine her sitting in the corner trembling like a wet kitten you found on the side of the road#arlecchino goes thru a crisis more at 11#shes a tired single dad shes isnt getting paid enough for this okay#hands u a fic over half the length of the other THREE PARTS#ehe :]#is arle actually on ur side??? is she gonna double cross u???? who knows!!!!!#shes unpredictable she might stab u for funsies#anyway im gonna go nap in a ditch now this took SO LONGGGGG OH MY G-D#also just think acolytes who arent buddy buddy w reader and even resent them is so tasty#bc how r they supposed 2 know reader was a human vibing 5 minutes before their got eebied 2 teyvat..#reader gotta roll up their sleeves and get 2 WORK sometimes murder IS okay#they gotta fix some shit around here and that means committing several crimes all at once. sometimes more#a group can be g-d (just got here) their dragon (neuvi) their cat (archon) their dog (wrio) and their wolf (arle)
465 notes
·
View notes
Text
ultimately!
#ELIIIIIIII YOU CANT SAY THAT ELIIIIIIIIIIII#audiof from not even emily latest video go watch literally its so fuckingfunny#dont even ask me how eli fits in hance' 5'2 dad's clothes pls ok#my art#digital art#oc art#anthro art#not even gonna lie i thfought i wasnt gonan finish this but we pulled thru#if quality gets murdered i will cry#swhy are all my favorite drawings baby sugar and eliyah interacting#i like themb#i was gonna add fucking comical cartoon slipping noises when her antler popped off but imovie literalsly. it didnt work it wpuldnt let me#vid too biggy#also noahs ark esque announcement for ppl thta read my evil ramble tags i miiight nuke sanguinary univers bc i love my ocs too much to like#like i dont wanna marry my first idea and i love them too much to box them into a project I PERSONALLY FEEL LIKE I FUMBLED LIKE#OK LITERALLY NO INSULT WHATSOEVER TO ANYONE WHO MIGHT LIKE IT BUT IT WAS my firsy ever comic and i feeeeel like i can do betteeerrr a#meowweooww#like if it was small things i wanted to change i could juts panel edit but its like. major things like when i started chapter 1 i had#LITERALLY NO PLAN JUST MY nerdy vampire obsession. which is still present. giggle h#breaking news boygirl learns that they arent rlly proudof the writing in comic thye started when they were a teenager#ALSO I LITERALLY HAVE LORE THAT IVE. BEEN MAKING THAT CONTRADICTS THINGS (? PROBABLY) SO ok trust me ok just trust m#also yes this is what i’ve been working on except that animatsuon i mentioned with eli crying because priorities or someth#not except wtf i mean insyead or some other shit#also i just looked at this wall of text on mobile and like ew shut up little gay
124 notes
·
View notes
Text
I do think its really important to remember that SY was suppose to be the villain character but its only because of his kindness and newly gained life that he didn’t end as one. In the very beginning of the story we learn that Peerless Cucumber Bro often left comments on how SJ didn’t get his dues and needed to be punished more, and only after he transmigrated did he acknowledge how awful of a death SJ had. He also made point to explain that he only read the book for LBH, which he noted to enjoy his decisive actions and deft ability to kill. Markedly, he liked his brutality and personality over the erotica that the majority of PIDW fans enjoyed. Peerless Cucumber Bro is someone who loves action and the ability to cut right to the chase, something that he does not do and most likely has difficulty with in his world.
Speaking of, it is something to note that Peerless Cucumber bro is rich. He had head chefs, he could pay for a 6k+ chapter book of erotica in 20 days, he noted that he could not understand SJs envy and ambition for power since he lives well, and he even noted to himself that his family was well off. He is incredibly wealthy, and it shows. Which is important to note because he, not once, showed any guilt or remorse on dying and leaving his family behind. Yes, he sometimes refers to people as being similar to his family but he never showed any pain for losing that life like he did when he lost LBH. This is important because I genuinely think SY was depressed and self destructive to himself, which goes against popular HC that he was chronically/terminally ill (I do like this HC and like how its portrayed in fanfiction). It would explain how he ended up dying all alone by himself, and how blase he was to his own life and death.
SQQ is a self destructive force who ended up dying three times, and didn’t feel anything about death itself. He was worried about others and the effect it had on them, but for himself it was up and on again like it never happened. He does not care for his health, had self isolated as SY to the point he died alone, and has a horrible self esteem to the point that he continuously agrees when other people put him down and often calls himself the villain. Even though we have seen the evidence of someone who is always being thrust into new situations and awful plots, he calls himself lazy and easy going. He hides his thoughts and feelings behind his fan and has a remarkably thin face. At the very base of his actions and his thoughts, he is self destructive, powerful, and smart. This is the set up for a villain.
However, when shown the actual people in front of him and forced to act as SJ did towards LBH and his disciples, he flinches from it. He notes that it happening in front of him was different. His entire self soothing comedy monologue went quiet when he had to enforce the Endless Abyss scene, and grieved for the childish innocence he killed from one of his favourite people. SY was set up to be the villain and obviously thinks of himself as one, but can not act as one. If he had the choice LBH would have been his sticky sweet white lotus disciple for as long as LBH wished to be.
His kindness, as seen in the book, is what turned him from being “the scumbag villain” to the protagonist we see in the novels. Which, yes, he is a protagonist! He even has the protag halo that LBH has and its very funny in the meta way for SQQ not to realize this, but thats for another post. But he loves his disciples, he loves his peak lord siblings, he loves his Binghe, he loves his new life, and he is kind. That is what kept him from being the villain he sees himself as, his kindness and love for others. Whether that be romantic, platonic, or familial, he loves the people he has met and he treats them kindly. That is why it is important to remember that he was set up as the villain by everything in the story we do not see, but what we do see is him continuously changing the story to fit a new genre that lets as many people as he can save live. Sorry sorry, I just think about SY being set up as a villain so much. It changes a lot of views I have on the series when I remember the duality of SYs story and character development.
#SVSSS#scumbag self saving system#Shen Yuan#shen jiu#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#Meta#I think?? Haha I dont usually do metas but I dont know how to write fanfic for this series#so Im just writing down my thoughts on the characters#Like how if we see this from the PIDW characters POV SY is truly a villain#Its just something that makes me laugh because he is a villain just as much as he isnt!#what a wonderful complex character to write for. This type of story.#I wonder if Peerless Cucumber Bro would forgive me for writing meta about him?? I think he would be kind of happy but utterly disgusted#ew fans that actually think im complex even though Im a really simple person with no hidden motives -SQQ probably#I love this fucking idiot so much I relate to him on a spirtual level and think he was probably depress to the point of having A Plan.#if you know what I mean#because I still think him reading PIDW entirely in 20 days marks a special occasion for something and if its not for the final chapter...#Anyway#I love this stupid sweet potato of a character#Oh! New tag!#Sweet Potato SQQ#for archiving puproses on meta for him#Probably not good meta I didnt even add quotes or page numbers Im just talking out my ass from what I remember#Watch me write an essay on this lmao
582 notes
·
View notes
Text
every time I hear someone say "oh you have to listen to Dear Evan Hansen it has such good mental health representation" I cry in Next to Normal
#next to normal#and yes this is based on a true story#generally I dont try to juck anyones jum so I of course didn't tell that person what I was thinking at that moment#and if someone found Dear Evan Hansen a useful text in terms of their own mental health journey who am I to discredit that#but this is the internet and I am back on the ntn train#in a way it is my saf autumn musical#and yes I am a survior of the 2017 Tony Awards why were you asking?#no but seriously#it is so interesting how many narrative devices Dear Evan Hansen took from Next to Normal#but turned them into a less complete piece#like Gabe in ntn is a representation of unadressed grief and trauma and the family has to accept that he will never be really gone#and connor is just...idk not fully thought out?#idk I'm rambling#but also#how the love story between Henry and Natalie means something#Natalie sees her parent's relationship and desperately doesn't want that for herself and Henry at the same time also stand for#a piece of normalcy that seems attainable#you don't sit there and think hu why is there this completely separate love story thrown in there?#it mirrors the problems#and dear evan hansen#do I even have to say it#I thnk the thing I resent it most for is that it has a love story#naja#I'm of listening to net to normal some more#sorry I someone who really likes deh stumbles accross this#I feel like espechially musicals can be something that can be so personal#and I don't actually want to contribute to more stuff like#ew why do you like this when theres xyz that is so much better or morally purer or whatever#I guess what I do want to say is: if I had a nickle for everytime they made a musical about mental health where theres a ghost on stage and#the sister of the dead kid falls in love with a funny guy while her family is falling apart
33 notes
·
View notes
Text
🍷<3
#when i got hashtag sick i was in hospital and i was doing my regularly scheduled call with my dad#and i really had no plans of telling him bc ive done that before and its not like he can scare the MS away or anything#i dont know what happened. maybe because it was such a fucking bad episode. maybe because i was so tired. maybe it was a secret 3rd thing#but one minute was like fine then i just burst into tears and i was crying so hard which is MEGA EW BC IM NOT A CRIER LIKE THAT#and my dad freaked out and he was like whats wrong and i didnt wanna tell him but I also sounded insane bc i spontaneously started sobbing#and he was getting more alarmed and i was upset that id upset him and so i just spat it out i was like 'listen king'#'its no biggie but my body is trying to kill me again and im just a little sad atm' and he replied 'baba why wouldnt you tell me?'#and this man who has a very big serious job literally dropped everything and took a 20 hr flight over#and he genuinely just grabbed one of his work suitcase because he showed up with nothing but dress shirts and his laptop#and i think maybe it healed me a little. i mean it def also made me sad too but mostly healed me#and he'd been here for a couple of weeks and he left today and i feel shit about being sad about it#again because he has a very big and very serious job and i genuinely dont understand how he even just showed up like that#so I felt guilty throughout#anyway i dont think he drinks anymore but i was like king have a sip of wine with me and he did and it was lovely#and I hope I become my fathers daughter and not my mother's child. praying to both our gods#heres to healing ❤️🩹
40 notes
·
View notes
Text
thunderhowl doesn't even like to lick mechs (he'll sometimes lick rocks or random objects to help decipher what it is if his smells can't help with its history) because he likes to keep up his elegant knightly air but. also. he likes seeing that seemingly impenetrable wall of soundwave's superiority complex Crack a little with the impudence of Utter Disgust
#i call this 2 second doodle HERE TAKE IT#i have to feed my two thunderwave fans and one of them is me LMFAO#i did not use a ref if u could tell by them looking like absolute nothing LOL#idc take my yaoi#LOL#take my godawful yaoi and do with it what u will#(write.... fic .... draw..art... talk abt it.. with... me...)#joth(jock goth) nerd vs goth theater nerd#4EVA!!!!!!!!!!#th: pardon my inquiry but are you trying to relay to me that your previous significant other#willingly expired himself to turn everything... evil..? in the ALL. SPARK ?#sw: yeah :/ lifes a bitch. he sucked anyways it's whatever ( has been listening to emo edgy songs loudly ever since)#<- lowkey adopted a one eyed cat stray#th: ... egads.#th: that is.. rather.. The Cool.. as you say#th: ... NOT YOUR LOVED ONE PERISHING HIMSELF I- I MEAN THE ATTEMPT TO- HOLD MINE HORSES- UM#sw cackling: no-youre good mech. it was pretty cool. for a nerd he was pretty bada- pretty fi- he. he was somebot. um.#sw: guess i could say pretty similar to you too#and even tho soundwave quickly looks away he can hear thunderhowl's tail thumping excitedly as it wags#soundwave#transformers#maccadam#tf cyberverse#tf#thunderhowl#thunderwave#sketch#soundwave saying ew like he doesnt groom himself like a cat while others arent looking
45 notes
·
View notes
Text
the exhausting slog of listening to anecdotal horror stories where rednecks are continually villified even if they dont do anything. "he was just so creepy... one of those fat mullet redneck types" ok and? ok and? and? ok? and the premise of the story is he smiled at you in passing? ok? and? there was one by someone who lived in the same kind of area i grew up but they were very proud to say they were middle class so you can imagine how many digs they took at the broke people around them that are systemically left to rot by the government. wow he only had two teeth? and theyre brown? are you going to step down out of your gold plated horse drawn carriage to pay for this man to go to a dentist? bc he sure as fuck couldnt afford to even if he wanted to. oh that guys fat? hes fat AND he has a mullet? doesnt he know only skinny middle class gen z kids are allowed to have those? what a disgusting perv. dont even get me started on old men who, oh god. wear flannel and have a truck. jesus fucking christ put them down already
#shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up#so called leftists when someone is poor and rural: oh god but what if hes got COOTIES? kill it kill it now before it looks at me ew ew ew#its like the hills have eyes out here its like deliverance all of these scary mean inbred hillbillies with no teeth and old cars ew ew eww#GENUINELY do me a favor and KYS#universal basic income and human rights for everyone except those uneducated racist smelly perverts who live in the mtns#except the mountains kind of go off and i like their stories and ''cryptids'' very marketable very demure very queercoded very removed#from all cultural context#oh you like appalachia? you like ''cryptids''? can you name a single community that the oral histories and stories came down from?#no and i know you wont because individually you would be terrified of any of those people if you saw them walking down the street#jesus fuck dude im so heated over this right now sorry
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
I cannot BELIEVE people are asking me to work while I'm at my job
#what am I some sort of worker?#I got an email (ew) and it was like 'this looks good but can you change one detail'#and the detail is literally an easy fix but UGH now I must do it#which means opening File Explorer and then navigating to the pdf and then opening it in Adobe and then editing the text#Tyler Talks
35 notes
·
View notes
Text
just went through the second part of the AQ and to put it mildly, im not handling these sad Victorian children well
#By not handling it well i mean im crying#LUMINE WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU#You worried about fucking CHILDE but not the actual CHILDREN we got in prison?????????????#Who cares if childe is dead or not freminet the actual child nearly got dissolved like mentos in coke!#Who cares about childe here??? Lynette nearly had her ptsd triggered lyney DEFINITELY got at least a panic attack#THEY ARE AT THE FUCKING PRISON WOMAN GET IT TOGETHER#also why are we having visions about childe ew and why are they fully cinematic?? Who is filming???#Like childe funny as a meme to observe but don’t actually get him that close don’t test me know ur place#When did we even become that close with childe??? Im sorry what???#I can’t keep seeing them kids in life threatening situations on trial then this????#Arlecchino you are on a THIN FUCKING ICE#Im watching you!! Im watching you you better not turn into an abuser by actual standards#*break into genshin codes* stay right were you are sweetie im coming rn im going to get you out of this game into a loving family#Im not handling this well#genshin impact#freminet#lyney#lynette#yes I know im the last human on earth to do the quest leave me alone it been a busy time#Im going to kill anyone that get between me and the safety of these kids CHILDE GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY PLOT YOU ARE MAKING THIS TAKE TIME
87 notes
·
View notes
Text
i honestly hate it when people just interact with me, even though im LITERALLY in their dni. I dont know how they dont realize it, even when they liked/reblogged my posts more than once. Seriously.
please. JUST BLOCK ME!!!! OR DONT LIKE MY POSTS?? It makes me feel guilty of what im doing!
#aimed at someone btw#toazty rambling#im too scared to tell them though caude wtf?? what if they just go like 'EW!!! why are YOU interacting with me then?!?!' like vro...#if im in your dni or something. just block me. dont just interact with my posts knowing that im in your dni. it makes me feel GUILTY!!!!!!#like?? how do i explain to them that im not supposed to interact woth them?#eithrr way. i also would feel guilty if i also didnt tell them/block them. cause huh? it'd be MEAN of me to do that! im not that mean to#just block someone if they did nothing wrong to me!!
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Funny that chilchuk has a thing for pretty blondes and ended up on a team that's half pretty blonde... Mr tims do u have anything to say for urself...
#i think he enjoys the eye candy and hates it#like before the laios monster hyperfixation reveal and the party getting closer do u think the touden siblings were like#chilchuks kinda hot coworkers that like... he's not interested but at least they're something nice to look at while you listen to them say#just the dumbest thing and its technically a labor violation and against your contract and you know its not bc theyre bad but#like. fr guys read thw damn contract#until you realize that you are trying to use your contract to get out of a company barbecue that honestly sounds kinda fun#they just aren't allowed to ask you what you're using your time off for even if its for planning#anyway.#he def likes big tiddy blondes and I mean. laios and falin are definitely that. interesting 🤔#im a chillaios enjoyer tbh#dungeon meshi#and marcille is also very pretty and blonde but I honestly think his dad instincts kicked in as soon as his ew elf instincts faded for her
28 notes
·
View notes
Text
I have scars on both my knees, my left one looks like a purple blotch because there's two more scars there that are relatively new. I think the whole mess of scars looks like a weird moth shape. Women in my family, all above the age of 45, mind you, have advised me remedies, to make sure I don't have permanent scars. Because "as women, scars on our body just don't suit us. Iykwim" and now I can't stop staring at my scars.
I don't think you find yourself ugly unless someone tells you you are.
#tho again to resestablish i do not find my scars bad or ugly unless they hurt#but yk what i mean here#who's gonna look at my elbows and see two long scars and be like ew yuck i hate you#and if they actually do have reactions like that do i really wanna associate with them?#suffer ye suhana nahi#desiblr
9 notes
·
View notes