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yamayuandadu · 3 months ago

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was mithra/mithras worshipped in mesopotamia like was his worship introduced into this area during the achaemenid and later periods? what about cities near mesopotamia like Palmyra and dura europos? also was he syncrestised With any local gods? maybe shamash

I’m sorry but due to space constraints and lack of sufficient familiarity with (or deeper interest in) most Roman mystery cults I can’t help much with the dissemination of Mithras and Mithraism on the eastern periphery. There is no evidence of his cult being present in Palmyra (Javier Teixidor, The pantheon of Palmyra, p. 106) but on the other hand it was definitely present in Dura Europos (the mithraeum discovered there is notable enough to have its own wiki page, apparently); I’m not really aware of any attestations from even further east. According to Encyclopedia Iranica, “though represented virtually everywhere in the Roman empire, it was much stronger in the Latin speaking West than in the (predominantly) Greek-speaking East”. As for Mithra proper: the oldest datable attestation of him - or a derivative, at least, since we are dealing with a highly divergent oddity with a plural name, it seems - is technically at least Mesopotamia-adjacent.

The treaty between Suppiluliuma of the Hittite Empire and Šattiwaza of Mittani (c. 1330 BCE) lists “the Mitra-gods (d.MEŠMitraššil; the determinative signifies plurality), the Varuna-gods, Indra, the Nasatya-gods” (translation courtesy of Gary Beckman, Hittite Diplomatic Texts, p. 43) among deities invoked as witnesses on the Mittani side. As stressed most recently by Eva von Dassow in Mittani and Its Empire (published in The Oxford History of the Ancient Near East), their position is not prominent, and they do not appear anywhere else. People who try to make this attestation into a big deal are basically automatically untrustworthy. The Mitanni rulers, regardless of their origin, were culturally Hurrianized to such a degree the presence of some derivative of Mithra in a single treaty is borderline irrelevant - and it might not even be strictly speaking Mithra, but rather generic “treaty gods” (hence the plural). I’m not really aware of any Achaemenid, Arsacid or Sasanian efforts to introduce the strictly Zoroastrian version of Mithra to Mesopotamia.

Whether it’s possible to speak of any connection between Mithra and Shamash is a complex matter so that’s addressed under the cut. The material from Hatra pertains to that so it’s covered there too.

To begin with, I’m not aware of any clear case of identification between Mithra and Shamash. It’s a suggestion which sometimes pops up in scholarship, but without any conclusive evidence, as far as I am aware. It’s not entirely implausible, though.

Typically the comparisons depend on sharing both judiciary and solar roles, but it needs to be stressed here that Mithra didn’t really have strong solar associations until relatively late. This aspect of his character is absent from the Avesta, and according to his article in Encyclopedia Iranica there’s no clear evidence for him having a solar role predating Strabo’s account of Persian beliefs. Therefore, it probably only developed at some point in the Achaemenid period.

One relatively recent example of seeking possible connections between Mithra and Shamash I’ve stumbled upon is the article Mesopotamian Influence on Persian Sky-watching and Calendar. Part I. Mithra, Shamash and Solar Festivals by Krzysztof Jakubiak and Arkadiusz Sołtysiak (accessible via De Gruyter). Some quite bold claims are made there, with the supposed influence going all the way back to the Bronze Age. However, the authors provide basically no archeological evidence for early Iranian-Mesopotamian contact (they also don’t address the fact early Iranians would very obviously encounter Elamites first when moving westwards); and some of their sources indicate that a thorough survey of literature wasn’t made (in many cases outdated generalist publications are the only sources consulted). I’m reluctant to recommend it as a point of reference for this reason. It seems much more sound to seek possible influence in the Achaemenid period or beyond. However, matters are complicated by the fact that Mithra is essentially absent from some of the earliest available sources like the Persepolis fortification archives, and largely just appears in theophoric names before the reign of Artaxerxes II.

Margaret Cool Root suggests in Defining the Divine in Achaemenid Persian Kingship (published in Every Inch a King – Comparative Studies on Kings and Kingship in the Ancient and Medieval Worlds, accessible via Brill) that there is already evidence for Persians being familiar with the iconography of Shamash and his association with royal power and legitimacy during the reign of Darius I. However, she doesn’t propose any connection with Mithra, only with the semi-divine king and Ahura Mazda, and relies just on motifs in monumental art. More sound evidence is available from the early centuries CE. Michael Shenkar (Intangible Spirits and Graven Images, p. 102) notes a figure on the relief from Tang-e Sarvak might be either Mithra depicted in a similar manner to Shamash or just outright Shamash. He also proposes that an unusual depiction of the Kushan emperor Vima Kadphises rising from between mountains with rays/flames emanating from his shoulders is patterned on Shamash’s iconography (Royal regalia and 'Divine Kingship' in the pre-Islamic Central Asia, p. 58) and that Iranian and adjacent groups might have associated the images of Shamash rising from between mountains with the customary description of Mithra as responsible for surveying the world from atop Mount Harā. He points out Shamash was still depicted this way in the second century CE, as indicated by works of art from Hatra. I personally found these arguments convincing at least in terms of iconography. The situation in Hatra is somewhat unique, and requires some additional explanations, though.

A good recent outline can be found in Aleksandra Kubiak-Schneider’s Hatra of Shamash. How to assign the city under the divine power? (there is a small mistake on p. 799 though - referring to Ereshkigal as a sister of Shamash is a questionable syllogism at best, and even her sibling credentials wrt Inanna are questionable as recently stressed by Alhena Gadotti). She argues the city god, Maran/Maren, was essentially a derivative of Shamash - or Shamash under an Aramaic title, something like “our lord”. Some of his local features are unique - for example, his symbol was an eagle, but Shamash was never associated with this bird elsewhere in earlier periods (it was mostly Zababa’s thing). Kuciak-Schneider suggests this might be an evolution of depicting him symbolically as a winged solar disk (p. 798). A slightly different view can be found in an earlier publication. Ted Kaizer in his 2000 overview article Some remarks about the religious life of Hatra states that it cannot be determined with certainty if the Shamash worshiped in Hatra was derived from the Mesopotamian god, or instead from the Arabic sun goddess (p. 234). He also the local pantheon combined “Mesopotamian, Arab, Syrian and Graeco-Roman elements” (p. 230) - but not Iranian. This obviously requires partial revision, since Lucinda Dirven in her fantastic My Lord with his Dogs. Continuity and Change in the Cult of Nergal in Parthian Mesopotamia does demonstrate at least a degree of Iranian influence on the worship of Nergal in Hatra. However, all I dug up in the case of Mithra is a handful of Iranian theophoric names listed by Enrico Marcato in Personal Names in the Aramaic Inscriptions of Hatra: Daosha-Mithra (“Mithra is my friend”), Mithra, Mithra-bandag (“servant of Mithra”) and Mithra-dāta (“given by Mithra”). It doesn’t seem these have any deeper implications than that there were some people with an Iranian background in Hatra, though. Marcato states that the presence of an actual cult of Mithra in Hatra is implausible (p. 167) and has been already disproven in the 1970s by Han J. W. Drijvers in the article Mithra at Hatra? Some remarks on the problem of the Irano- Mesopotamian syncretism, which I tragically failed to find online. For what it’s worth, he also notes some of the same theophoric names occur in material from Palmyra as well.

#mesopotamian miscellanea #iranian miscellanea

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soleiltac · 2 years ago

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Okay, recently I found out the information from Disney Wiki that AUTO from WALL-E is the only non-sentient robot in the movie. And I don't feel like that. :(

I am aware that he is meant to be an antagonist, the "villain" of the story as he follows his directives like there's no tomorrow. But, I didn't think this trait should define ALL of his personality. Like, he clearly had emotions and showed them in a restrained way. Or at least I thought he did?

I decided to rewatch it.

Warning: spoilers, potential grammar, punctuation mistakes. Excuse me, english is hard!

***

Why do I think AUTO is a sentient robot? My observations.

• Every bot on this ship is capable of emotions, when why an intelligent steering wheel isn't?

• Well, why, he actually has them! You can tell it by his body language and a tone of deep synthesized voice.

He expresses:

1. Frustration, annoyance.

- "CAPTNNNNN D:" – AUTO said calmly.

2. Surprise.

- He is genuinely shocked to see WALL•E with 'the p l a n t' on his head. I actually laughed at his reaction.

- "n ot pos sible! 0:" every now and when.

3. He is persistent and blutantly stubborn. Strict on himself. Some people can be like that without any directives.

- Captain McCrea needed to give AUTO 'a stern look' for him to share the information about directive. AUTO reluctantly obliged. (At least he tried to reason with Captain.)

- "sir, i INSIST you give me the plant." (Dutch Van der Linde voice here: "he INSISTS...")

- (And the whole plot obviously.)

4. Anger, fear. McCrea: – You want it? Come and get it, blinky.

Auto: – N O.

- "E N ouGh" 😡 *flips the ship around impulsively*

- "NOT POSSIBLE D:" but with more panicking tone.

- "NoOOo..." when he gets deactivated.

• The whole sequence with manual is... interesting.

- At this point of the story AUTO ordered GO-4 to steal the plant from EVE to make her look defective in Captain's eyes.

- I felt how much AUTO and McCrea are tired of each other's presence. AUTO is patiently anticipating McCrea's attention, he is eager to do his job.

(- Captain tries to imitate jogging in his seat and AUTO for some reason looks at him with puzzled and uncertain look. )

- AUTO keeps pretending like he doesn't know anything...

• Which is actually not a common thing for robots. "Lying is a human emotion." (c) HAL 9000

And yes, hiding the truth is considered to be lying too.

It's not like he was instructed to lie by his superiors, they didn't care. But rather it's the tactic that he learnt while being active for 700 years. I bet he understands it would be much easier to secretly yeet the plant into space without bothering captain with a decision. I suppose it required some thinking in his mechanical brain.

When why does he show the captain an operation manual? Good question. My personal headcanon: he loves doing his job so much, it doesn't matter for him if it can increase risks towards his global goal. That is why I can tell it wasn't a programmed, logical decision of the machine. If non-sentient perfect AUTO knew about A-113, he wouldn't let captain see the possibility at all. He hasn't considered that his domestic human pet might get interested in whole "Earth" thing. And he hasn't considered sentient WALL•E and EVE as serious obstacles. He did a crucial mistake to satisfy his ego... Or... Or maybe not? It's a headcanon, after all. Maybe it was a part of protocol. Or maybe he tried to entertain McCrea. AUTO seems to care about him in some way as he didn't push him out off the power until the last moment. (uwu) Choose whatever you like more. It's a thought-provoking subject.

• That aside, have you noticed that there is not a single character in the movie who would not be terrified of having to leave the comfort zone? It's only AUTO, who is opposing this idea for the sake of survival. Recolonizing nearly-dead Earth is not an easy work, someone can get really hurt and, well, die. And knowing that AUTO is based on famous computer HAL 9000, who is, in fact, killed people because of his panic attack (he didn't want to be deactivated/murdered), this situation kinda gets a new meaning? It's an interesting perspective to look at AUTO's character, too. AUTO, like HAL, at the start of story was okay and non-hostile towards others. Eventually, as the story progresses, AUTO becomes more and more impatient, eager to complete his primary task, thus taking violent measures. In AUTO's eye WALL•E & EVE are rogue robots anyway, defected and dispatchable. But attacking the captain? AUTO's final step to AI "madness" was fighting the man he is designed to serve. And though I believe he wouldn't kill him, we can imagine AUTO was panicking at this moment. So, no programmed logic there either, pure emotion of fear and reckless behaviour, almost like HAL. And HAL is 100% sentient and conscious entity.

*** Well...

Maybe it's just me and my anthropomorphizing tendencies on non-living fictional objects. I can be self-projecting too much, so if you disagree, let's say it's my headcanons and leave that at that. After all, AUTO is a direct representation of BnL – heartless company, that destroyed life on Earth and continued destroying it in space. They made humans, their customers, helpless like babies! And I am afraid it could only be worse in the future, if it wasn't for WALL•E and EVE.

It's quite a tragedy that AUTO can't escape from this never-ending system of least resistance and comfort. He is the system. He is made to be an autopilot of Axiom, he IS the Axiom, programmed to do his job fully dedicated to the mission of saving mankind. And if he was really fully-sentient... well, it would've made his life even more miserable. What's the use of the steering wheel on Earth surface? It's not like they are gonna fly into space again. Captain's dead and woah, hello eternal loneliness, next generation forgets about your existence or decides to ignore it like a bad memory about containment. Even AUTO's closest henchman GO-4 is forever destroyed... *sigh*

I am overthinking too much, aren't I? Gosh, this wheel NEEDS a redemption arc. And friends. My heart bleeds for him, really.

#AUTO is a sentient being #with poor life choices #nevertheless #give him a chance to be nice #I made it angsty in the end #analysis?#text #wall e #wall e auto #my thoughts #ai

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plutorine · 8 months ago

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Thoughts on Demons (2014)

this was originally going to be part of my demons (2014) thread on my twitter, but i'll just be dumping my thoughts about the series here on tumblr. i'll continue where i left off from where i closed the thread.

spoilers below the cut. there will be triggering content as well (suicide, mention of blood). don't expect this to be coherent. also i haven't read the book yet (oooh when i tell you about how desperate i am in getting a copy here in the PH), so yeah.

long read ahead.

okay. the last scene i watched last night was liza nikolaevna (and mavriky) getting beaten by the townspeople after the death of the lebyadkins due to her connection to stavrogin (and stavrogin being the main suspect of the siblings' death). did they really have to beat the poor girl? why must a woman (yet again) suffer from the misdeeds of a man HGKJDGFJGHDK

also pyotr,,, maniacally dancing in the pig pen....

man. the whole thing about shatov finally getting the chance to be a father and live with a family of his own only to be shot in the head by pyotr is just. :((( my jaw was on the floor i tell you. i was devastated and utterly wrecked.

the thing with demons (2014) is that it's on a different level of insanity than, say, c&p. c&p is depressing. demons wrecked me from start to finish. i cannot stress how many times the hairs on the back of my head stood up whenever pyotr would manipulate and rope in stavrogin in his plans.

it has the vibes of like,, trying so desperately to wash off blood from your hands but the blood just "magically" keeps on getting redder and redder and it doesn't really come off

also what the fuck was that pyotr??? mans just shot shatov in point-blank range and has the audacity to eat chicken (without washing his hands, to boot)??? like OH you going to HELL hell.

this scene with kirillov's lines:

i mentioned in the thread that i had to brush up on russian history before i read/watch demons because otherwise, it would just completely fly over my head

it was pretty interesting watching how this movement that pyotr was trying to mobilize fit the existing narrative then within the context of 19th century russian politics; demons was essentially dostoevsky "warning" of what could possibly be if people who thought like verkhovensky would get the upper hand in deciding the course of the russia's future

i admit i can't really speak about this because well, i'm not russian, but i deeply appreciate the how dostoevsky was able to weave all of this in his novel in such a way that leaves even me, a foreigner, in deep thought about what the implications of such an ideology would have on a wider context outside its country of origin

ok kirillov wtf HAHAHAHAHA ang gago niya XD

stavrogin's confession.

VILE. stavrogin you VILE, VILE, MAN. i don't have any words for it at all. raskolnikov ends up looking like a saint when i put him next to stavrogin.

on another note maksim matveev's teary-eyed face in that scene is so fucking beautiful i almost cried along with him

i seriously want to ask dostoevsky why he insists on making beautiful the characters that we're supposed to dislike/critique

heck even that notion warrants much introspection

like he's about to k-word himself but he still looks so hot? okay i need to stfu

i like the bit here with tikhon talking about revolutions and such:

this reminds me very much of my country's very own EDSA Revolution (there's EDSA Uno and Dos, but I'm talking more about EDSA Uno here because it's probably more relevant to the political state of my country rn). i won't go into depth about it, but you can check the wiki of it to get an idea of what i mean.

(they can be *gets shot*)

the ending scene. okay.

i talked about this w my twt moot and according to her, the most accepted theory is that the kid there (with dasha) is stavrogin's, and verkhovensky's reaction to seeing them there was like him getting the idea to continue his failed twisted plan, but with the kid in the place of his father. just. what the fuck man. leave that kid alone.

i was also told that this scene wasn't really in the book? yeah. so there's that.

concluding thoughts:

at this point i'm quite used to ruslit plots wrecking my mental state and subjecting me to emotions that make me want to stare at a wall, so this experience with watching demons (2014) was not as jarring as i feared it to be XD as expected, there were really some scenes that left me like "huh??? 🤨🤨", but really that's because i haven't read the book. what i plan to do is once i get the book, i'm gonna read it as i revisit the series.

also maksim matveev? yeah. that man is HOT hot. i could stare at his stavrogin all day if i could.

that's it for me! thank you to everyone who engaged with the thread, it made the experience of watching demons (2014) more enjoyable.

my next target watch on the dostoevsky adaptation list is the italian tbk film!! that or the 1968 russian one. will definitely make a live commentary thread about either on twitter as well.

#shut up rin #fyodor dostoevsky #demons (2014)#devils #the possessed #russian literature #rin's stuff: ruslit commentary #nikolai vsevolodovich stavrogin #pyotr stepanovich verkhovensky #ivan pavlovich shatov #alexei nilych kirillov #darya pavlovna shatova #lizaveta nikolaevna tushina #maksim matveev

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atv-migrated · 6 months ago

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lil rant about how i've been feeling as of late, a state of the union address if you will

i love being here i love my muses here. being in this fandom has always been an incredible drain on my mental health and i've had to completely abandon it multiple times because it's just not been good to me or for me. i wish i could be here 24/7 and thrive but that's just not the case and the closer we get to ho/td s2 airing the worse i know it's gonna get.

i'm gonna be so very fr and say i've never felt good enough to be here. i've always felt like respect in this fandom is earned by how well you remember the books and how much you dislike the show, immediately followed by how good your aesthetic is. and that's just not me. i've got the aesthetic thing down but that absolutely came from feeling like i had to make up for what i'm lacking. i've read the books, i listened to the audiobooks while i was painting during the pandemic but like i do not remember them and it feels fucking shitty to constantly feel like because i don't remember super specific details from the books or because my muses are generally show based that i'm not good enough or that my writing just isn't enough. i don't have the time or energy to be rereading these books and taking notes in the margins like i'm in english class. the wiki is my best friend.

and i used to just interact with show based blogs but more and more i'm finding those just don't exist and i fucking get it. the energy here is rather unwelcoming at times. trying to write here feels like taking a test a lot of the time and i'm just barely passing. i feel like im getting a C maybe at best.

honestly i'm jealous y'all can retain this amount of information about the books and i probably could if i tried, lord knows i did it for h/p and marveI movies and pj/o back in the day. but i had more time then and it didn't feel like life or death as much as it does now.

idk what i hope to get out of this i just have been having a hard time being here and writing and pretending like i feel okay with the space i take up in the fandom when i don't. i love my friends i love y'alls passion it's just a lot and its an intense experience being here and i feel like no one really ever talks about that and maybe no one's experiencing it like i am and i'm just more sensitive cause i've also had a lot of like interpersonal problems with this rpc but i had something to say thats being bugging me and i've said it. and you don't have to like it but it's how i feel.

#negativity tw #nico stfu #this is the same reason why as much as i loved the faIIout show im not joining the rpc i know how i feel here and i cannot fight this battl #on more than one front #*[ OOC ] . . . growing strong

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decarabiandivorce · 9 months ago

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According to the genshin wiki, amos’s name translates to “burden” (or at least the hebrew version of the name). Any thoughts on the implications of this?

oh i have thought about that a normal amount. Usually, I love tying it into my backstory of her c: An archer needs to be strong and I imagine her taking care of her community a lot. It was her burden to carry, now that she was an archer without prey. It didn't feel right to not do anything. It could never feel right. In her heart, she was an archer waiting to strike- but stagnation for too long was something she could never fully accept. She has carried many things in her lifetime, from secrets to fears.

A burden is a responsibility that one can not abandon; a pressure from external and/ or internal matters. Physical and metaphorical I do think that Amos acts from the heart. She is so full of love that it's the only thing that could really damage her. She will take on the world for the people she cares about. (And the realization of who she really should be taking care of happens much too late)

It's one of the reasons she fell for Deca. A person that could carry her burdens for her. But life without improvement was a different sort of stagnation. To eternally dream causes muscles to weaken and minds to soften. Surrounded by a sea of grey, were her eyes as sharp as they were before?

Ough this is giving me inspiration to write more of Amos's thought process when it comes to her relationships with people :p I wonder what I should nickname this one, either Violetgrass (Bluebells by another name) or Endymionis somnum dormire

Amos was a strong person. She hunted in the woods beyond the city, brining back meat to share with her friends and family. She did not ask for much. She did not have much. Amos the hunter was her name. Her last name? She never cared for it. Being a hunter was nice. Staying still for the perfect shot. Just for her patience to be rewarded in one quick swish.

Her parents taught her the way of the bow. They urged her to put it down as well. To settle with someone that could take care of her. One day her bones will tire and her wrists wouldn't be able to withstand the arduous tasks.

Amos was strong. She cared for her parents til their final breaths. She cleaned the now empty house by herself. She had many friends she loved to help. Any burder they had, she could take on.

She taught the children of her friends how to be an archer. She did her deliveries and as the rumors of war broke out she didn't worry. It was a matter between gods.

Then the winds began to storm and her dreams of green were no more. Her tasks were no more. Still those she helped so long ago took care of her.

She felt like a burden. A hunter without her prey. All she could do was sit by the armourys of old and keep up the upkeep. The other hunters and soilders have already gone home. No one to inspect at the city gates nor a chance to take their own somewhere else. The greenhouses at least gained new members.

Despite her many years of waiting, she felt restless. There must be something she could do! Much like a maid knight in the future, at a simple call she would be there in a second. "Amos, could you please help with this?" "Amos could you please help with that?" She loved to help. The belt on her side was no longer filled with arrows, only lists and letters.

Like the mint plants that weave through the concrete cracks, she survives. She always had.

Day and night held no meaning to her. Task after task. She could do it all. She could do anything.

Her face grimaces as she notes the bottom of her shoes needing to be glued back in. Her boots were getting old and she would need the support of a clan to purchase a new pair. Tailor Skyle still owed her that favor, she could ask her later.

Walking past the kids playing in the streets, she smiled. They waved at her before going back to play their game. They had made a show out of the information coming from the few outsiders. Words about the Wolf King's newest strategy or rumors of how bad this war across the world has been. The stone gate's leylines protected them from the wrath of geo, but the anemo in the air had to have a victor.

The tower in the center of the town was the only place safe from the storm. Its sturdy walls stayed quiet. Season by season the number of guards lessened as the few who found themselves of use to their king wished to conserve their coin.

The tailor greets her, holding the hand of her wife Riza. The baker had made her beloved a container of soup for lunch and had dropped by to see her. Amos smiled as the trio talked and Skyle did calculations.

"Red looks good on you," She could hear her friend mutter to her wife.

"Everything looks good on me." Riza smiled back. Her hand playing with the edges of a napkin. She was wearing a crimson bracelet on her hand. "Hey Amos, you like it? It's our anniversary present to each other."

The tailor sighed, "I can't believe Mr. Whisker would betray me like that. How dare a fluffy face like his tear my bracelet to shreds the moment I place mine down. Our perfect anniversary ruined by that adorable bastard. It's going to take so long to remake the pattern."

As she looked closely, she could see the slightest pattern of flowers. Roses if she remembered correctly.

Riza bent her arm to give Amos a closer look, "It's based on a tale from my side of the family. My father was eager to share the tale of the red string with his future daughter-in-law." She kissed her wife and Amos looked away.

Her eyes wandered as the two began to talk. She knew the guy they were telling her about, how he would gift her parchments and books from the lands south for the holidays. He was a nice guy, but she blanked on his name at the moment. Her eyes rested on the harp in the corner of the shop. She had one of those big ones back at home, but it was way dustier than this one. The feeling of string in her hands that needed to be plucked at the right moment... Yet before she could say anything, her friend was finished.

She thanked them and embraced the storm outside. The kids were gone, perhaps off to their homes for lessons or mealtime. Besides the regular rumble that surrounded the city, it was quiet. Trees and flags rustled like instruments and she made her way back to where she was staying.

Tomorrow was the same. So was the day after that. And the day after that.

Of course, there were new developments. The person that used to take care of horses fell in love with the butcher's son. One of the head clan's harpists was arrested for murdering her rival. She was invited to the wedding of one of the kids she used to carry on her shoulders. Still, she was.

She was.

Content.

Her eyes and body tired as she put on her best clothes. It was a humble affair, a family friend of the groom was one of the Lawrence and allowed them to use their home as the venue. Everyone was in pairs. Some people even more.

She wore a violetgrass in her hair, one of the rarer plants in the greenhouses' glebes. It costed her a pretty coin, but she couldn't help but splurge.

The event was nice. The couple spoke their vows and their kin held a toast to their happiness. Til death will they part.

She smiled. She laughed. She was so proud of her friend.

Someone tossed something into the air, and on instinct she caught it.

Roses so red and Celcilias so white. They smelled fresh, but the bouquet felt heavy in their hands. Crimson splashed against the bone-white and faded grass. Yet there are cheers around her. Smiles and jokes. "Oh, when is the wedding for Ms. Amos?" "It's a sign for you to settle down Amos dear!" "Want me to make a dress for you like I did them?"

She smiles. She laughs. She steps aside. "Come on you guys! It's their wedding! We should tease them more instead!". The violetgrass feels heavy on her head.

The beginning of the end starts with such good intentions.

"Ms. Amos!" one of the children squeaks. She had just finished fixing a post one of the animals knocked over before she felt the small hands of her neighbor's daughter on her dress. "Don't tell Lance but I wanna marry him when I grow up!"

"Is that so?" Amos pats her on the head. "What about that Charles boy that likes you? Or Amelia?"

Her face scrunches, "They are so borrring. And Amelia hasn't returned my ribbon yet! Lance is so cool! He can use a catalyst!" she pulls on the hem as the kid jumps up and down. "When are you getting married?"

"I don't plan on it." is her usual answer.

"That sounds lonely." was the usual reply.

Amos smiled, "I won't be lonely. I have you guys!"

Her neighbor's child frowned at her. At least this one was honest about their thoughts. "You sure? Cause I think that would be sucky."

The pale-haired lady lowered her eyes, "It's time for dinner. I think I saw your father get fowl today at the market. You should get going."

"Okay, Ms. Amos! Can I be flower-girl at your wedding?"

"Bye!" Amos says back.

She closes her eyes. The party a couple weeks ago was nice. Everyone was enjoying themselves and reminiscing on old times was lovely. There was another invite in her mail. An engagement announcement right next to it. The Bakers down the street were having their 2nd child. The Smiths were having triplets.

She grits her teeth as she makes her way back into her empty house. The dust was getting worse. She would need all day tomorrow to tidy the place up.

Yet instead, she chooses to fall face-first onto her bed. The blankets were in the same position they were when she woke up. The wood underneath her creaked as she squirmed. It would be nice to have someone in her arms. Have someone hold her. Have someone greet her when she comes home. It would be nice to have someone to share her burdens with. To greet with a hug. To whisper the vows to.

Yet the only one in her bed was herself. She was never an imaginative person, only able to build upon memories. What would it even be like? How would it even work? How do you even meet someone like that? How do you know this is the person you would devote yourself to? How would you know you were attracted to them? Was it like that Red String her friend told her about, a moth drawn to a flame?

She knew what a pretty person was! She had eyes! Yet. It was always surface-level. She could never imagine sharing a life with that pretty boy at the southern gate. Nor the scribe who doodles hearts on her receipts. She didn't know them. She felt no connection to them. That's what attraction was... right? A connection?

She gripped her pillow tightly.

She needed rest for tomorrow. She could think about this another time.

The storm was quiet today. It ebbed with her lord's mood, but today seemed different. Perhaps she had been imagining things. Sap from dying flowers needed to be crafted into glue. The arrows she'll never use again deserve their tail feathers.

Washing her hands, she tidied the armory's workspace. Clearing away the stuff on the desks was her first task- she wouldn't want the violetgrass's poison to stain.

The soft chime from the door was barely audible. Turning around, Amos noted the person a couple steps away from her had green eyes. No pigment could describe the hue, only barely comparable to the crystalflies or perhaps seelies. A cape on his right shoulder and an even longer cape on his back. Stormy grey hair and skin sickly pale.

Who the heck was this guy? He didn't have the features of any of the townspeople. Was he one of the wealthier people that lived in the tower? Even then she would have heard rumors of such a person. There were only a handful of people with silver hair and she was acquainted with all of them.

A foreigner would make sense, but only if he had arrived before the storm. The gold accents on his pauldrons and clothing seemed flawless- and he did not look like the man who knew about metal upkeep. Wait. Then why was he here in an armory?

"Good day." She greeted as calm as she could be. She was not worried. Surrounded by her old companions, she had spent hours wielding and testing each one of them. Sure she may not be the best at a claymore or a simple short sword, but any one of them would do in a battle.

"Hello," His voice was calm.

"Looking for something?" She asked. He placed his gloved hand on his side, his movements almost like that of a marionette.

"No."

"...Well okay then?" Amos tilted her head. His voice had an accent? That odd way of speaking the Mason family had, with some breathiness to the vowels. Time flowed once more as she tried to concentrate on her work, but this guy was still there. She kept looking back, like they were playing a game of Ochs am Berg.

"So stranger what's your name?" she asked, but got no reply. "... I see. A quiet one, are ya?" The arrows were done, time to clean up and then move to the shields.

"Yes. I am a quiet person." came the short response.

Socially it would be a good move to laugh it off, perhaps add some lip service, but this guy was giving her nothing to go off on. Maybe he did want to just sit and watch, a cat laying on a windowsill. Perhaps she was standing in his way. Or worse: it meant nothing at all.

"Cool." She muttered.

Somehow this became a habit. The two of them, never really introducing themselves to the other, would spend a portion of the afternoon in the armory together. Occasionally, the green-eyed man would comment on the abandoned armors and weapons. The unsaid question of why she continued to do this task on his lips. There was no need for anyone to fight. There were no fights. Everything was at peace. So why was she standing in a room ment for battle.

She never answered him. How could she put into words that this was her choice. Her old friends. Relics from the times she would have hunting partners side by side. Artifacts of campsites and friendships. It was illogical.

Yet, the silence was nice. The silence could make one pretend the other understood the other.

One day, he handed her a cloak that matched the one he wore. "It's cold." He spoke, his voice soft and gentle. As she placed it around her shoulders, she could not help but smile at its warmth. So light yet so strong. Not a single stitch was loose and her only complaint would be how the accents shimmered in the light. Still, she had hung up her bow- so stealth need not be an option.

Her mistake.

"Oh, is this a courting gift?" Came the questions. "Are you finally settling down?" they asked. "Who's the lucky person?"

She takes the cloak off.

But he looks at her with such concern. She does enjoy his company, whatever his name is. She likes talking to him. Sometimes she finds things throughout her day that makes her want to show him it.

She wonders what it would be like to meet outside the armory. She feels like she wants to impress him, to take him out of the city and show off her sick moves in action. She dreams of them patrolling the area together, maybe even becoming neighbors.

The cloak is in her hands now. It's so soft. Would his hand be this soft? Would his chest? She never thought of it before, but she wants to run her fingers through his hair. She wants to hold him and laugh with him. To see that sunny smile peak through his clouds.

Yet, she tells herself. They are barely friends. She barely knows his name. His story is his to tell, and while she had confessed the circumstances of her life... he has always been her green-eyed mystery.

It's so heavy, all of it. The mutterings. The attention. This dance was tiring. She wants to rest. To ignore the questions and stop acting happy. Amos just wants to be Amos. It's not like she can be Amos the archer. She.

She.

She hates this. Can't they all just get off her back! Go away! What she is up to is none of their business!

They are just concerned about you, her mind whispers. Her heart aches. She knows they just want what they think is best for her. That they belive that she will be lonely for the rest of her life. That's absurd! She has them! Do... do they not consider themselves as valuable to her as they are?

The rustle of the storm hums around her. Like a lullaby, she can feel it drowning out her thoughts. Her friend had been giving her more violetgrass once he learned they were of her favorite color. Purple. Such a lovely hue. Imports of those dyes cost a pretty coin, but these flowers lived near the stone gate. Useful towards pests and can even be made into some medicines. "Should you ever turn one inside out, you would win your true love!" A common saying among the hunters.

Win your true love. What a joke. If love was a game, she did not want to play. Was she supposed to bring an inverted flower wherever she went? Or was the game set by the time the contested meets their prize.

It was bad luck to bring this bouquet into her house. The neighbors will talk. And so will the neighbor's neighbors. But that's all they ever do. Talk talk nag nag. It's just some flowers! It's just a gift!

"Decarabian give me strength," She muttered. Not one to be a nun, she only knew the basics for events. "I do like the guy. But. I don't even know him. It would be so much simpler to learn about him. I could tell the Masons or the Peggs that his family doesn't like me! I would be free from their questions."

But what if she does like him. That this yearning to watch stars with him was what they would call love. That the urge to sit around and do nothing- to be by his side and vice versa... what if that was love.

Why did she feel so lonely after making this connection? Why does she want this? Why does she want to give into the pressure and sink into his arms? Have that heavy weight upon her heart to go away once and for all.

Despite her many years of being alone, she felt restless. Was this fear, love? Was the desperation to have someone to talk to when she came home, love? Was the yearning for him to wipe away the tears rolling down her cheeks, love?

She felt like a burden. An archer without her bow.

Amos closed her eyes and pulled the cloak close. It still smelled of him. If there was anyone she would be safe sharing space with... she guessed he was okay.

#what do you get when you take a touch starved person who longs to be needed and add in a touch starved being who longs to have her be safe?#miscommunication and tragic a-spec ness #MWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAA #this was probs wasn't what you thought my response was going to be but eheheheee i love thinking about Amos #Decmos #steel text #Amos genshin #genshin #amos is so bluebelll core its insane and luckiliy violetgrass is a thing!#decarabian #genshin impact #man i really should come up with a fic tag or smth. steel text is usuable for now tho #slight ocs but they are just there for flavor

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idioticbat · 10 months ago

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hey i like your art, have you ever messed about with transients and filtering to try and make some of the e(v|bh)or consonants as sounds?

Thank you! Also I've never heard about that; I suppose you mean something like creating a voice synthesizer? I have the phonology of their language defined according to linguistic terminology and using the IPA, alongside other things on a wiki that runs on my computer, it looks like this:

this is the current version, the old version was essentially the same thing, but much more convoluted as I tried to use consonant/vowel harmony as a way to create room for sound change and make a language I could evolve into various dialects, then daughter languages; Things were not defined clearly as I wanted to have it feel like Proto-Indo-European, but then as I started developing the world more and more and felt like I wanted to use the Ebhor's language to write things like myths and poetry from their perspective, and a "mysterious not fully known proto-language" wouldn't do, so I had to start again from a more well-defined proto-language.

I think a voice synth (if that's what you mean) would be cool if I wanted to have a faithful representation of a highly non-human anatomy and have sounds that are unpronounceable by humans, but that was never the case; instead, I want my constructed languages to feel naturalistic and be fully usable by real-world people like myself; When I want to convey that some people from my world have long snouts or beaks, I can give their language many series of closely-articulated sounds that would be easier for them to distinguish than for us (such as having /t͡ʃ,c,k,q/ on the same language, even though those already occur on some real-world languages); Maybe I can omit labial consonants like /m,p,b/ because they don't really have lips or something; Maybe I can use bidental consonants; The thing is, all of these can be accurately represented through the IPA and pronounced by real-world people, which is really cool when you think about it, suddenly these languages spoken by aliens is not too different from our languages and their experience of the world is not too different from our experience of the world =)

I have plans to maybe do a showcase video for this language, which would include reading words/phrases/text but first I need to finish the morphology and syntax, as I'm still not fully satisfied with it.

#also I need to become brave enough to record my voice on what would be at least a ten-minutes-long video ahahah x.x #conlangery #not exactly art #?#answered #ask

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itsmeeleanorstill · 2 months ago

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I promised i will make a post about explaining what the scp fundation is because i think not many people are familiar with it but i mean most people who haves been around the internet enough have heard about it but we can never get the cannon information, can we?

Thats because there isint but kinda is cannon information! The scp fundation is an online wiki where people can upload stories about all kinds of cool creatures they can think of on the wedsite scp-wiki.wikidot.com

The only thing that really ties these stores togeder is the name S. C. P. wich is short for secure contain protect and the sistem that haves been aplied to these creatures based on how much of a danger they are and if corse much more but thats for anouther post lets get into the easy stuff and those are and those are

NEUTARILZED - no longer anomalous

SAFE - easy to contain not gonna kill you

EUCLID - was a bit hard to contain can be a danger just be carefull treat it well and everything will be fine

KETER - will not hasitate to kill you it is a danger and it was hard to contain so if it gets out we are fucked and it can get out of hand

We got the basics down lets get into the unversal lore stuff thats not but at the same time cannon

The scp fundation captures creatures that does not look or act or do anything that is not very fitting for our normal human world and studies them to know how they got to be that way or to just get them away and protect normal people

There are researchers and scientist (two different things wich i didnt knew)

Scientists focus on developing theoretical knowledge, while researchers concentrate on practical applications of knowledge to answer questions or solve problems. (Copied that straight from google yall i dont know the diference eather but they are diferent)

So the scientists gather informations about the scps take tests basicly try and figure them out in any way possible

And there are the personels/solders those two words just basicly mean the same things here its depens really on the person they are the people with the guns who contain the scps keep the staff safe and make sure everything goes in order almost like security guards but a like more cool (people who like the cool swat solder look but dislike the military or for any reason they need something thats similar this is a great option)

And there is the D-class basicly human sarcafise am sorry i cant say it other way they are there to die they help with the experiments for exaple see how an scp would react to humans begin locket up with them all kinds of stuff honesly

#scp fandom #scp #scp foundation #secure contain protect #d class #scp secret laboratory #scp scientist #this post is just me purely yapping about nerdy shit

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delicateartisantrash · 4 months ago

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aaaaAAAA: Author Struggle Bus

(If you don't want to see my personal posts, my tag for these is "#dat rambles")

Not me pulling at my hair smacking my forehead on the desk because I am well into the next chapters of Gladiators of Kaon; and I am unsure if my representations of the Precious Beans are accurate enough because confession I haven't actually watched all of G1 yet I've seen like 1 episode and a half and then I got distracted writing fanfiction and reading o o p s but the story floooooows

(author ramblings continue after the cut)

and now here I am with many chapters and it's adorable and I love it but also p a n i c because it's my first time writing them. I hope ya'll don't have specific expectations for characters because OPE I SORRY I AM JUST WRITING WHAT I SEE. And reading a lot of wiki pages. (Whoever does the captiosn for images on that site, oh my goodness, they are SO WITTY. I LOVE IT. Sarcasm, puns, sattire, my sides are hurting from how much i've laughed while reading up on transformers i've never actually heard of or met before and researching lore ideas to yoink for the world building of this story's universe and setting)

I have read a stupid amount of wiki pages.

still though

it's like

my favorite chapter rn because ADORABLE SPARKLINGS UGH EEEEEEE and it's so friggin' cute I can't stand it (comfy chair and blanket acquired, one parrot loose and one happily eating noms \o/). I hope it goes over well but if not oh well

writing Soundwave when he's not in Perfect Composure Mode is an entertaining and endearing experience.

#dat rambles #Gladiators of Kaon #Fanfic #Transformers #I figure Soundwave's a tired dad #that's a LOT of Sparklings to be taking care of solo holy hecc

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decreare · 9 months ago

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I made a magic system that addresses sexual dimorphism: Part 1, a c&p Discord rant

(DISCLAIMER, I looked into fate lore some more so I do not know if I simply reinvented the wheel due to my lack of proper understanding. but I will still question about Natsu's choices, like why circuitry instead of the countless examples of chi pathways). "Imagine if true magic is like going to the dmv that is the root that gives you a card that basically says "I can do this forever now" lol"

"The reason I hate Magic Circuits the most is because they aren't actually explained. instead, they are simply a power-level stupidity. That and the actual difference between magecraft and magic (yes I know about the root and the 7 and mystery and the fucking old man and the clock tower but that is NOT what I mean. I mean what is the difference between someone casting fireball with root-granted true magic and whatever eugenics bullshit magic circuits and mage crests is supposed to be).

I hated it before but this anger has been reignited because I figured out a way to make SENSE. This means my dumb head cannons beat out a dumb mushroom and his friend obsessed with blonde swordswomen.

Magic is inherent to all, mage circuits are simply a way to express the magic within (women on average have more magic circuits but this was originally for a personal setting so let us not get into that). The lack of useable magic circuits does not mean an inability to use magic however, rituals and worship could grant people the ability to cast minor miracles in the age of mystery. So church, religion, mediation, etc, that kind of stuff, creating the best spell of all time, hardening. Simply because less mage circuits means less of an ability to project magic meaning any magic cast was weak and close to the skin.

Magic itself is bargaining with the world, gaia and alaya. Due to humanity's collective lack of capability, humanity was allowed to use magic to its very limits if they didn't burn out their soul from using their mana wells for whatever spell they were trying to cast. Think of magic as cash a mage has to pay the world for an ability. Thus proper spells are born (the church had a form of spells but at a much smaller scale) to do wording shenanigans to let the world allow them to cast whatever spell they want.

Now mystery wanes, Alaya and Gaia now know of humanity's competency and can outright REFUSE whatever a mage asks. ("Go buy a lighter you nerd"). You can still try but it's not really worth of. Now personally I am not going to apply mystery as a concept to my personal setting becasue magiteck is fucking cool and fate doesn't allow it becasue the two concepts throw a hissy fit from being shoved together and Chaldea existence is an anomaly granted by a grail wish." (P.S. I know about how Kiritsigu became a mage because his dad was a holy man) (P.P.S. someone please send how Rin explained magic to Shirou because I am more of a wiki diver)

#fate series #fate stay night #ramblings #rant post #fantasy #magic #witches #discord stuff #fake fan alert

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mlobsters · 1 year ago

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supernatural s7e11 adventures in babysitting (w. adam glass)

when this started i was like. is this... going to be a twilight new moon reference...

which is my favorite scene in the series, it's my favorite adaptation of how the book did it (a blank page with just the month name for 3 pages in a row), and it's one of my most favorite and memorable usages of music in a movie.

youtube

while the circumstances are less permanent, new moon really hit for me with grief. and in fact i made a little parallel thing with this scene in spn s2e3 bloodlust (sera wrote that one) when sam and dean are in the thick of john just dying.

i wrote a little bit (under the cut) about my own parents deaths in the last episode and as ever this show pokes at my dead parents feelings and i'm not sure this episode is gonna go down with me. john dying was rough on me in that stirring up personal grief way, i'm hoping to not have a repeat of that experience.

(minor music rant, i think why it gets to me so much is because i am such a pushover and so easily emotionally manipulated by tv/movie music. *usually* if a show wants me to fell sad, they're gonna hit that button with music if nothing else. and i dislike it when i feel like i'm being manipulated. so to have a show not be able to hit that low bar, when i am already extremely emotionally connected to the show, THAT is notable. and not good. because like i said, i'm a cheap date. like just for a second there i felt that real sadness with this generic sad piano score happening as we go from sam and dean arguing and deciding to work different jobs to sam knocking on the kid's door. it was right there! but it petered out as soon as it came. -- edited to add: not surprisingly, it's a jay gruska ep)

wolverine, is that you?

teen wolf s3e8 visionary - madison mclaughlin as paige krasikeva

i thought the kid looked familiar, paige in teen wolf?? baby derek had to mercy kill her

surely dude would have a scarred up arm by now, with the number of times he's slicing himself. on the same wavelength again, i also suggested this little test back in episode 6 :p

FRANK Do I look like I know? You think it's easy to see this deep into what's real and also be bipolar with delusional ideation? There is no pill for my situation, sweetiepop, so, yeah, best guess – the bigmouths are onto me. Next question.

cue reading the delusional disorder wiki page, i didn't realize delusions could come without other symptoms of psychosis

so i think i've seen stuff he's been in but nothing jumping out worth grabbing a picture of. but he keeps pinging a) tom sizemore b) that he's somehow related to mark sheppard/crowley c) patton oswalt.

FRANK Got the equipment arranged. Come and get your costume on. We can scoot. DEAN "Costume"? What?

okay, that was cute.

not cute for me, the bumbling around on the cherry picker -_-

SAM (on phone) Dean, hey. So I think this guy was hunting a Vetala. Um, Dad took one down back in the day. Silver knife to the heart, twist, they're done. He says they're maladjusted loner types – like to knock a guy out, drag him home, feed slow. So, if Krissy's dad got grabbed, there's a chance he might still be alive. Be nice to get this girl's dad back home to her, you know? All right, I could use your help. Call me.

hitting us over the head with the point again. GOOD TO GET A DAD BACK TO THEIR KID HUH

you just said you could use dean's help.. but you went alone anyway and got jumped (very easily i might add) and bitten? great decision making, sam

DEAN How long was I out? FRANK 'Bout 36 hours.

excuse me WHAT. what a cheap way to add a bunch of tension and conflict that's also completely not believable. i don't care how sleep deprived he was, unless there was some medical condition happening there IS NO WAY.

FRANK Did I mention you look awful? DEAN Yes. Maybe because somebody I cared about just got shot in the head. And this is like shoving a rock up a hill. And – screw you. FRANK Here's my advice you didn't ask for – quit. DEAN What? FRANK You want to keep going? DEAN I want Dick Roman on a spit. FRANK But you're gonna drive yourself into the ground first. Good plan. DEAN I'm not gonna quit. It's not even an option. I'm not gonna walk out on my brother.

not totally sure how quitting equates to walking out on sam, but okay. oh wait, was he saying quit hunting altogether? (that totally went over my head, i just am realizing now after finishing the episode and rereading before posting lol)

KRISSY My dad left, and he didn't come back. Sam left, and he didn't come back. I give you the info, you leave, you don't come back.

she makes a good case and we get awkward roadtrip with kid for dean

DEAN Because I hunted one that turned out to be two a couple years back. KRISSY And you never told Sam? Wow, thanks. How 'bout sharing that with the rest of the class so we don't all get killed? DEAN Sam was away at Stanford, smartass.

okay but what? if sam was at school then john was alive and somehow dean never got that information to john so he'd update his journal? i don't think there's a gap that this could have worked in when john was dead but sam wasn't with dean for long enough to do a hunt/not talk about it. weird.

anyway probably just a segue to bring up college with the kid.

KRISSY So... Guess I'm retiring – one and done. DEAN Really? How you feel about that? KRISSY Who knows? Maybe I'll go to Stanford like Sam. KRISSY We're so lame. DEAN Yeah, we are. Take care of yourself.

that was sweet.

SAM You know what? Good for them. DEAN Yeah. It's nice to walk away from someone and feel like they could be okay. How about you? How you doing? You all right? SAM No. I'm definitely not. But, you know, I mean, um, I think, maybe... I just want to work. SAM Should I even ask? DEAN I'm fine. SAM "Fine," meaning...? DEAN You're right. We should just... work, right? And figure out a way to kick Dick Roman's ass. Well, hey, we are the professionals.

obstinate as dean can be about some things, he sure will take other people's advice to heart and start implementing it. though faking the smiles for that long while driving was creepy and sad

is it too much to ask for sera gamble to unironically like twilight???

#supernatural #spnwatch #spn 7x11 #sideburns #twilight new moon #spnhiky #hiky #madison mclaughlin #teen wolf #paige krasikeva #Youtube #adam glass #lykke li #chopsurveillance #spn musical score #jay gruska

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anthonypanics · 1 year ago

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I was tagged by @grey-automa. I haven't done one of these in.. a while I think. so here goes.

were you named/named yourself after anyone?

Supposedly my name was a combination between my parents names. I don't see it myself.

when was the last time you cried?

Last October. Death in the family.

do you have kids?

Not unless you count cats.

do you use sarcasm a lot?

A lot more than you'd would be typical of one officially diagnosed with a syndrome named after a Nazi collaborator. I do wonder if I actually have autism or if I've got some misdiagnosed form of ADHD.

what's the first thing you notice about people?

Consider this as one part my own projection and one part my general observation: I think everyone's set up with their own worlds. Everyone sees and hears what they want most of the time and says what they find amusing at that moment. Everyone's got their bubble of knowledge that's expanded so far that it becomes hard to empathize with when things aren't part of their bubble or that other people aren't aware of things in said bubble. Everybody's simultaneously cursed with the knowledge they've accumulated overtime and hindered by a reluctance to accept the unknown, including that sometimes things will always be unknown even in our current age of (mis/dis)information.

So I suppose the first thing I notice is whether or not a person's willing to participate in the discourse of the unknown or if they're just going through the motions that's already set for them. Which I guess is just a pretentious way of saying I notice when a person only wants to listen to their own voice or if they actually want to talk with other people and both contribute to and get something out of a dialogue.

what's your eye colour?

kinda green I think?

any special talents?

Hyper-fixation is a blessing as well as a curse. Once I'm on a track, it's damn near impossible to get me to off it.

Surprising people with tricks I've picked up from childhood exposure to theatre has been kinda fun too.

scary movies or happy endings?

The two aren't mutually exclusive, but to not be a dick about it and get at what I think this means; depends on the mood I'm in. For most movies, I just want a feel good time, and every once in a while I'd like to explore the deeper and darker end of the pool and see what's lurking in there. A good ending isn't always a happy ending after all, but a good happy ending can do a world of wonders for the soul.

where were you born?

Flint. Yes, that Flint.

what are your hobbies?

drawing, tabletop gaming, video gaming, writing, diving into wiki rabbitholes

A lot of these overlap more that I'd like them to.

Occasionally I read a book, but not as much or as often as I'd like to admit. Tried to read Earthsea for a bit if anyone wants a recommendation.

have any pets?

Yes, my two beautiful cats Randy and Dunken

what sport do you play/have you played?

Not really a sports ball kind of person.

how tall are you?

gnome sized

favourite subject at school?

Funny enough, I enjoyed math and science classes more than arts and literature. Though I did have a really good writing teacher for one year in high-school that I wish I can look up and give her my thanks for changing my view on writing.

dream job?

The market for it is grim and I'm self conscious about my capabilities for it at this point, but I've always wanted to design some kind of official game that a lot of people would play and make their own thing with it. That or make a really cool looking animated project. Not much of a job as it's kind of a goal I wanna do.

tagging: @catmemer @monster--boyfriend @p-r-i-c-e-r @furbearingbrick @jthepearlord @citrucee

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knife-moth-mc · 1 year ago

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With the music asks, I'd like to ask prompts: 1, 3, 11, 19, 23, 26, and 30!

1:A song you like with a color in the title

3:A song that reminds you of summertime

11:A song that you never get tired of

19:A song that makes you think about life

23:A song that you think everybody should listen to

26:A song that makes you want to fall in love

30:A song that reminds you of yourself

1: It's All Over Now, Baby Blue by Bob Dylan, but specifically this version. I haven't formally posted my Haven music playlists anywhere (I will do that.... soon......) but this is one of the first songs on the arc 1 playlist. You can think of it as Anathema and C!Moth's meetcute song : P

3: The Beast of Pirate's Bay by Voltaire. A girl I went to summer camp with... gosh, at least a decade ago now--taught it to all of us since we didn't have access to music that wasn't us singing. I also learned about Homestuck and bisexuality from her, so, you know, pretty much all the good parts of my life I found originally through meeting her that summer. Wiki, if you're still out there, thank you.

11: I could be wrong, because I haven't known it that long, but I think I'm going to go with Blacksoul by Onya. I could say more about it but honestly just listen to it. It's beautiful.

19: God Fearing, Sea Faring Man by The Accidentals. I listened to the album this is from a lot back when I first stumbled onto it, and while I think the band has now largely disavowed it it remains very deep in my heart. This specific song has stuck with me especially, I think because there's a kind of... the word that's coming to mind is grace, it feels like there's a kind of grace to this song. It feels like a moment of clarity. If I had to claim the meaning of life was buried in any one song, I would pick this one.

23: I'm going to cheat here and say an artist, because so far as I know they only ever released a handful of songs, most or all of which I try to link people to every so often because they're not otherwise available. I'm talking about superedge, who was a fanmusician back in 2015 or so. I hope they're still creating somewhere, but they've left behind some of my favorite songs in the world and I'm grateful that I happened to find them when I did.

26: Ben Caplan's cover of Lovers' Waltz by A. A. Bondy. The original is also solid but something about Ben Caplan's version really particularly speaks to me. I think according to the lyrics this song is actually about dying together? Which makes this a weird choice I guess but it feels in a way comforting, and I think fits the prompt better, because I have lots of people I love! I don't need a generic love song! But this song feels deeper and more permanent, in a way that's at least as appealing as it is scary.

30: You know, I have a whole collection of books that are me; you'd think I'd have a collection of songs that are me. But I don't. I think I have a tendency to shift songs from me to my (or others') characters, or to strongly associate songs with the circumstances under which I first listened to them. I've been combing through my library trying to think of anything and I could make some cases but most of them are weak. So I'm going somewhere very personal and emotional, and I trust you'll understand.

When I was 17, I was in a really bad place. It was, I think, the worst year of my life bar none. I'll spare you the details, but one day after a really intense couple of weeks, I played nice until I was given back my ipod. The moment it was in my hands, I grabbed my bike and fled to the library. I cried the whole way there, and I listened to this song, The Bust from The New Albion Radio Hour by Paul Shapera. This wasn't the song I came to identify with at the time--that would be The Wasteland, from the same album--but to this day, I can't listen to it without remembering that scared teenager.

#asked and answered #ask meme

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number1villainstan · 1 year ago

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AtLA Analysis Rewatch: S1E8: Winter Solstice Part 2, Avatar Roku

Intro: I've given up on trying to do this specific episode, at least, all in one day. I'll probably lose some of the overarching plot stuff this way but at least I'll actually do it.

Lot of spiritual, Avatar-specific stuff in the Previously section--talking about the Avatar's past lives, and how to connect with them. Also some crucial details about Crescent Island. Perfectly natural for this episode. I expect to pick out a lot of details about the Fire Sages and religion. (Did you know that Agni is a fanon deity, not a canon one?)

Opening scene is Aang trying to drag Appa into flying, without Sokka or Katara. Stubbornness and a sense of protectiveness over his friends; but also, in the same breath, a feeling of invincibility. Although he considers the possibility of his friends dying, he doesn't seem to understand that he could also die. Katara's line "The world can't afford to lose you to the Fire Nation. Neither can I." might foreshadow their later romance, but it also might be taken as purely platonic here.

Mayor (?) guy from last episode says that it's a "long journey to Crescent Island." a) How does he know that? b) How fast can Appa fly? c) How tiring would the journey be for Appa? The geography/pacing of these episodes are weird. Speed of plot and all. I also wonder exactly what's in the pack Mayor gives Aang, and why it's got a stick on top. What fabric is it using and where did they get it from? Is it just big leaves? But where did they get the leaves? Why is it tied like that?

Why was Zuko just...waiting outside Mayor guy's house? Why did he think shoving him back inside would be a good idea?? Also, he jumped straight from "Having trouble sleeping?" to "Seen the Avatar lately?" That's hardly impactful dialogue. Your mother would be so disappointed that you can't even think up proper villainous dialogue. ...Also, naked Iroh riding a Komodo rhino to the side. I had to go back to last episode's analysis to remember the context of that. :P Zuko's shove, I noticed, looks similar to a firebending move, with him drawing his arms back and placing his hands so that the palms face the 'opponent' (using that word pretty loosely here) and the fingers point up and down. Firebending training showing up here?

The sun seems to rise real quick in the Avatar world. Much quicker than in our own. It also seems to come with an already day-blue sky, rather than the red/orange/pink colors that come with sunrises and sunsets in our world. ...yet another case of astronomical inaccuracy.

Iroh actually gets mad at Zuko for daring to sail in FN waters--enough to raise his voice to a yell when he reminds Zuko that "the Fire Lord" banished him. Why is Iroh talking about his brother so impersonally? (I know why, but that's the Doylist explanation. I want the in-universe one, the Watsonian one.) I also believe that this is the first time in the series that someone has said that Zuko was outright banished, and not just dishonored. Right after Iroh yells, he softens his voice and indirectly asks about Zuko's welfare--"What if you're caught?" Zuko says he has no choice (he does, he could plan/strategize and try to predict where the Gaang would exit FN waters without actually entering them, this is just his impulsivity) and that his father will understand. (Zuko, you poor naive little boy.) (Iroh agrees with me here in this scene.) Iroh also refers to Ozai as 'my brother,' and I can't remember if this is another first time or not.

Fire Lord Ozai casts a large shadow over these two characters, even as he hasn't shown up in the show yet in any real capacity, not even as the shadowy figure of the Big Bad Villain. (I checked the wiki; apparently his first appearance is in this episode.) He casts a large shadow on the whole show. But we don't get a lot of canon characterization for him beyond Big Bad Villain, and what we do get we have to infer and debate based on tiny scenes and scraps.

So, Zuko is at the telescope himself during this talk, trying to look for the Avatar. Lack of trust in his crew? Self-initiative? A combo of both, probably, knowing both Zuko's bull-in-a-china-shop character and his royal (classist) upbringing.

So, the flaming ammo for that catapult. And the catapult itself. Are all FN ships outfitted with one? It came up from under the deck--where is it stored? How is it maintained? Who maintains it? Also, for the ammo--we know that the gray flammable gunk smells bad, thanks to Iroh (does he not know how this works, with his preference for 'something more fragrant'?) and we know that the brown fabric-tied stuff underneath is also flammable, but what's in the bundle? And what's the gray gunk supposed to be, oil or something? (Also, on another note, what sort of cultural details can we glean from Iroh using a fan, even a plain red one? I thought that was a feminine thing in Japanese or Chinese cultures, although I may be wrong.

It looks like the smell/fumes of that 'hot stinker,' as Katara calls it, are also a part of the attack. I wonder if the Gaang's eyes are watering?

What's up with the blockade? Why there? Is it specifically around Crescent Island? How much manpower is it using? I wonder what life is like for the soldiers on that blockade.

So, both the Gaang and Zuko decide to run the blockade. How late in the day is it? How far away is Crescent Island? How long would that detour to the North have taken?

And Zhao's back, in all his oily, awful glory. What is he doing on/at the blockade, though? The captain(?) he's talking to is concerned about Zuko's ship, although he doesn't seem to realize that it's Zuko's. Also, why is Zhao calling Zuko a traitor? Is it because he's about to run a FN blockade, or does it relate to The Scar Backstory? (What even was the official public explanation for that? Who even knows about that?? What kind of gossip is going around about Zuko while he's gone?)

(Okay, going to go through the blockade scene and then stop for the night.)

Zhao's ships, which look to be the blockade itself (again, what is he doing there? Inspections? Trying to guess where Aang's going? Does he know about the solstice and Avatar cycles and Crescent Island and whatnot? He does seem to mess with the spirits a lot.) seem to have more than one catapult per ship (three, it seems?); an upgrade to weaponry in the years Zuko's been gone?

Appa's real good at dodging those hot stinkers. (Also, I wonder how much of Appa's grunts Aang can understand, and how much of Aang's commands Appa can understand.)

Zuko's warned by an engineer(? Could just be an experienced crewmember, he looks pretty old) that they need to stop because the engines are damaged, and he still says "Do not stop this ship." Makes me think of Azula's "Do the tides command this ship?" Maybe it's a royal thing, being entitled jackasses even in the face of uncircumventable realities. Also, if the engines are damaged, shouldn't they be slowing down or stopping or turning?

Appa pulled off some serious speed skills to save Sokka. Also, Aang seems to be trying to 'drive' Appa the same way someone would drive a car; dude, Appa's an animal. He can see that Flaming Balls Bad. Appa can dodge on his own.

So, when Aang burst apart that flaming ball it broke into chunks. No fabric, and it looked like dirt? Dirt's not flammable. Although maybe it doesn't need to be? But where are they getting dirt in the middle of the ocean? (Unless...it's not dirt? Solid human waste isn't exactly in short supply. Gross, though.)

Okay, so Zhao's not on the blockade because he knows Aang's headed to Crescent Island.

So it did look like Zuko's engines were stalling, or his ship was slowing down. Although just cutting the engines for Zhao's ships wouldn't immediately stop the ship, would it? I can only imagine what's going through Zuko's head as he's looking up at Zhao. (Zuko's ship is a whole lot smaller than other FN ships, yet again.)

Finished blockade scene. Got 8 min 21 seconds in. Current word count, including this paragraph, is 1458 words. Jesus, this is going to be another long one.

Starting this again, a few days later. I hope I'll finish the rest of it today. That's probably not going to happen, though.

So, it seems the passage of time is being measured by the tint of the sky, not too bad of a choice, and Appa seems to grow more tired--head and legs hanging down. How many hours was that? Where was the blockade supposed to be? What the hell is AtLA geography, anyways?

"I was talking to Appa." "Well I was talking to Momo." God, they're such siblings. Also, does Momo's reaction mean that he can recognize his own name?

That's a long way up. Also, was that balcony constructed? Why? Also, if FN officials knew the Avatar was back, why didn't they put any guards at the temple?

Why specifically five fire sages? I know that Chinese(?) mythology held 5 elements, but this world has four elements and this is a temple dedicated to one element. Also, how exactly did they know that Aang was the Avatar? Did they get a drawing? Did they have some sort of vision during that scene when all of the temples lit up when Aang went into the Avatar state for the first time in the show?

Only three of the sages threw fireballs (too large a chance of hurting another sage if the two in the back fired?) and Aang is apparently so fast in escaping that neither the sages nor the viewer see him go. Impressive.

What on earth is the floor plan for the temple? Because it looks like it's a grid pattern but also a massive maze?? And the walls are made out of metal like it's a military construction?? Or is it wood/paper/actual building materials that I can't tell because the animation didn't put those details in??? Probably the second one tbh

"Firebenders aren't our friends." It's kind of an odd/simplistic way to phrase that, since potentially nonbenders from the Fire Nation/loyal to the Fire Nation cause would also not be their friends--indicative of a simplistic worldview from living in the South Pole and having little contact with the rest of the world?

Okay, the walls sound like metal. Also, how does the mechanism for that secret door work? And why does it lead into the mountain? Again, what is the floor plan here??

The sage says his grandfather knew Avatar Roku, and that he formed passages out of the magma, and that he once called the temple his home. But if Roku was a traitor to the Fire Nation, why would a temple be built on his home? Unless it wasn't? Questions for S3. Also, what was the grandfather's relationship with Roku? Because I'm not sure the timeline works if they were the same age. Also, why did Roku make those magma passages? But if 'many generations of Fire Sages' attended to the temple, that would mean that the temple was built before Roku, so it must have been that Roku lived in the temple for at least some period of time?? And then what about Sozin? There's no way this sage was alive when Sozin declared war on the Air Nomads. NOTHING ABOUT THIS MAN'S TIMELINE MAKES ANY GODDAMN SENSE. FUCK.

How long did they spend inside the temple? It feels like it has to be after sunset by now, but maybe that's just me pausing and unpausing to write this.

Is there any other way into the chamber than the secret passage (or the windows)? IIRC later in the episode Zuko and Zhao will both get into the chamber outside Roku's chamber, likely through other entrances.

Okay, so Friendly Sage's name is Shaiyu. (I think that's how it's spelled? Shy-you, if we're using words.)

"The sanctuary doors! They're closed!" Uh...duh? Why would they be open?

Ended at 12:55, through finding out the sanctuary doors are closed. Not including this paragraph, word count is 2079 words. And I'm only a little over halfway done with this episode.

What's up with those pillars in the background, with the dragons? I mean, I know what's up, they're there for structural support and probably decoration, but who put them there, how did they think up the design, etc etc.

What's the design/functionality of that firebending lock? Also, is there really no firebender powerful enough to create five separate fire blasts? Two feet, two arms and a mouth, that seems enough to me. Would hardly be a dignified move, but if you're alone and/or desperate, it could probably work. Unless a regular firebender couldn't make all five fire blasts powerful enough? (What's the trigger for the locking mechanism dependent on?)

...I bet Ozai could unlock the door alone. Or Azula, with a bit of practice/more and specific training.

The little 'ding' and the zoom out to the lantern above Sokka's head was hilarious. Loved it.

Speaking of lanterns, how did it get that red glow? Probably just through red paper, but what's inside? Is it just a candle flame? Wouldn't that snuff out after a while? Because that lantern looks pretty airtight.

Okay, so I thought Zuko was just being stupid when he decided to let Zhao follow his smoke trail, but no, apparently he's got an actual decent plan. Where did that mini boat come from? What's its capabilities? Is it supposed to be a life boat, a tug boat, a boarding boat? Probably the third, given that this is a military ship. When did the crew find the time to put in the upkeep for that ship?

Lamp oil in an animal skin. It's a good idea (and probably what the lamp shot was referencing before), but I think if they want the fire to go into the lock it's facing the wrong way--it should have the opening going into the hole. Although maybe then the fire wouldn't get enough air?

Would lamp oil really explode like that? (At least now we know how the lamps work.) Seems dangerous for a lamp to have exploding oil. Also, would the twin/rope they tied the bags with really have that sparkler effect? I know they're supposed to be bombs, but the components seem wrong for that.

"Did the definition of genius change in the last hundred years?" lol

I saw from one of the shots that Crescent Island is legit basically erupting. Lava flowing, smoke pouring out. That's...that's not how real volcanoes work, is it? I'm pretty sure we went over that in our geography unit. Generally lava is supposed to stop flowing once an eruption has stopped, since an eruption is from the buildup of pressure in the magma. Like one of Earth's pimples. Anyways.

Aang's tantrum here is...interesting. I don't think we often see Aang angry in the show, but he still reacts with yelling and throwing blasts of air at a door (although, thankfully, not at any person). Clear frustration, one of the few times we see it from Aang in the show iirc.

Sokka is the one to come up with the fake firebending idea, but Katara's the one that realizes what effect the fake firebending's effects on the lock would have. So it's not just Sokka that has ideas. But also, does this imply a difference between the way they both think? Sokka with engineering and things, Katara with people?

...Seriously, with all of those moving parts--how the hell does that lock work??

"Crawled through the pipes?" There are pipes connecting the chamber to the outside, where the doors are?

Those Sages are agile for a bunch of (presumably) old men. Also, how and where did Zuko get in? Is he familiar with the temple and its layout? He'd presumably have the right to be, but it's been three years since he was in the Fire Nation and had access to the temple, and to a sixteen-year-old three years is a long fucking time. When did he arrive on the island? He had to have had time to navigate the temple and get to the chamber.

...speaking of time, when the fuck is the sun going to set? I swear the AtLA planet is rotating at the speed of plot.

So, the Sages are helping Zuko? The banished and disgraced prince? Why? What motivation do they have for that? They're probably pretty high up, socially speaking, unless Ozai and Azulon and Sozin all started discrediting them, as part of the propaganda FN citizens are put through as part of schooling. Even so, why would they not hear about Zuko being banished and disgraced? On the surface, you could say it's because he's a royal, but like...Zhao's actively competing with him, and he gets promoted. What's going on inside their heads? Also, when did they even talk to each other?

Patience, Aang, the sun is (finally) setting. Just wait for a few seconds for the light to match up. Although--why sunset, and why on the solstice (winter, I'm guessing)? As well as the murals on the floor--where are those from, and what do they symbolize? On the other hand, there's kind of the question of why there's a temple at all, much less such a massive and ornate room dedicated specifically to Avatar Roku, when Roku was, what, declared a traitor to the FN by Sozin for not being gay back saying that he couldn't do an imperialism? Possibly it was at first to keep the Avatar sympathizers/more spiritual side of the nation calm, and then possibly it was forgotten about? God only knows.

So, Shaiyu invokes duty as a moral, as in the duty of the Fire Sages. Part of me wants to pick that morality apart and compare it to Zuko's honor. And then Zhao comes in, having somehow spotted and followed Zuko's tiny tugboat, and applauds the guy for his 'heartfelt speech' (that was two sentences long, that's not a speech!). So Zhao at least professes a plan to take Shaiyu to Fire Lord Ozai (although who really knows what's going on in that conniving head of his). Shyu, actually, I looked it up.

I remember one of the character pages a friend shared on a discord saying something about Zhao having the feel of a slimy sycophantic corporate ladder-climber, and...yea. His 'two traitors in one day, the Fire Lord will be pleased' bit really plays into that.

"Sooner or later he has to come out." a) So Zhao is patient when he wants/needs to be in order to achieve his goals. b) There are so many gay jokes you could make with this.

Why the mountainous and foggy setting for the vision? Why that specifically? Is it because it's familiar/like home to Aang?

Oh! Yes! This is the very first appearance of Ozai in the series! Shadowed face, surrounded by fire (even if the lighting would realistically let us see his face), and shirtless. Why is your waist so small, Ozai? So that other men (Zhao and also Hakoda) can grab it? Gayboy. And a drama queen with that mouth fire blast. Now we know where Zuko got it from (if it isn't like...the entire nation).

"Finish the war once and for all" is really fucking vague, my dude.

So Roku outright warns him that if Ozai succeeds (in using the comet) balance will be un-restorable, and yet I remember that at the beginning of the finale the Gaang minus Zuko decide to just wait until after the comet. So did Aang forget that warning? Did he never tell the others?

I believe this is the episode where the time limit is set (summer's end, when Sozin's Comet comes). Also, that (mastering all four elements) is a hell of a task to ask of a twelve-year-old.

I wonder what the choir-chant music is supposed to be (scene switching back to Zhao awaiting Aang outside the door). Zhao commands his soldiers to go full throttle--does he anticipate the Avatar State? More importantly, why do I ask questions that I know will be answered if I just hit play and wait a couple seconds?

Damn, Zuko got chained up too? Rip. Also, spikes on the door. Ouch. On the other hand, with the light, Zuko looks away and I think so do many others, but Zhao doesn't, and the soldiers don't. Wouldn't that hurt their eyes?

Okay, so the chamber is at the top of the temple. And the wall was fucking destroyed apparently. Also, how did Roku heat up those chains without burning anyone severely?

Katara refuses to leave without Aang. I think Aang's going to be fine...although it would be disheartening if he woke up and was alone.

Oh dang, Katara was right to be worried. Also. How the fuck is no one fainting from heat stroke? Did anyone get caught in the lava? This should have a lot more casualties than it does.

Okay, so apparently I was wrong before about the Sages having a high social status, if a commander (which is canonically lower than an admiral) can arrest all of them so easily and with such confidence.

And that's all! Final word count, including this paragraph, is 3,684 words.

#atla analysis rewatch #atla analysis #atla meta #atla #avatar: the last airbender #s1e8 winter solstice part 2 #atla zuko #atla aang #atla katara #atla iroh #cw swearing #atla ozai #atla roku #atla sokka #atla zhao #admiral zhao

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