#like in my hometown id even understand

[earanie]

30 degrees to 10 degrees in 2 days climate change let's goooo

[creaturefeaster]

back on ids would characters have disability cards? also on that topic does leon still have the limp he used to?

I think they'd have something like that, if not then at the very least a specialized version of their ID to mention that they may need accommodations. Or perhaps even a marker to indicate as such.

To my understanding, living in the states which has no disability cards as far as I am aware, a disability card elsewhere is essentially a card that says, "I am disabled, this is the level of disabled I am" and it allows for accommodation and access to disability benefits. Correct me if I am wrong.

If my understanding is true, I'd like to imagine the society of Theia is already kind and aware enough to people with disabilities to not have to have a card to convince people you need aid. That's what I'd want for my universe, at least.

As for Leon, yes he does. He has an abnormal gait caused by a severe leg injury when he was young. He got better but the pain and gait remains, especially if he does not take it easy. It is painful to run, though in a life or death situation he's able to do it for a short amount of time. Won't be fun though. He has a cane, but because his hometown is small and is not one he leaves much ever, he doesn't feel the need to use it to get around unless he's having one of those days of exasperation.

[useless-catalanfacts]

I'm pretty sure that ask from a Palestinian family is a bot, i've gotten so many of those in my inbox and I'm 90% sure they're all bots

Look, I'm going to answer this assuming that you mean well and that you're not trying to spread this rumour to take part in genocide and get Ahmed and his family killed.

It is not a bot, it has been checked that he is not a bot. There are people like @/nabulsi, @/el-shab-hussein and @/90-ghost on Tumblr (and others from other organizations and other platforms) getting in touch with all the people asking, checking their national ID card to make sure their names match, and that all their story matches. That's why verification lists exist, because people have put in the effort to verify all these people, even when it's extremely difficult because internet connection isn't stable in Gaza and all of them are already busy enough with trying to survive because Israel keeps telling them to evacuate to "safe zones" and then proceeds to bomb said zones, they have to queue for hours to get some water and some food, and the tents they're being forced to live in reach 50°C. The Palestinians in our ask boxes are doing everything they can to save their families and themselves. Can you even imagine being in that situation? Living a hell on earth, a genocide, your home destroyed, your business destroyed, relatives and friends killed, bombs exploding at any time around you, your hometown in rubble, your school/university in rubble, food extremely expensive and you've lost almost everything you owned, malnourishment and illness all around you and knowing hospitals have been bombed and doctors are being targeted, fearing for your life and the life of your children, your parents, your partner, if they are even alive, hearing how people are getting kidnapped, tortured, and even raped by Israeli soldiers and the state media celebrates it. And on top of this, the only way out is to beg strangers on the internet proving your disgrace with photos and videos of your most vulnerable moments and your children's most vulnerable moments, in a language that's not your own — in some cases, in a language you don't speak or understand, written in a script you can't read, but that someone was kind enough to type a message in for you so that you can re-send it. And on top of all that, people will see your suffering and say you're a bot or a scammer. Can you imagine?

You will never see me post or reblog a donation link to someone who has not been verified, because I know that such risk exists. Most people who are asking and aren't verified are real people in need, because it's difficult to get verified in these circumstances. But I don't speak Arabic, I can't verify myself, so I'm choosing to focus on the ones that we know are verified while those who can speak Palestinian Arabic get in touch with the others and complete the verification process.

I've gotten less on this blog, but on my main blog I've gotten dozens of asks asking for donations and reblogs (I've not counted but my estimation would be around 50) and out of all these, only 2 were fake. The fake ones used PayPal instead of GoFundMe, their stories said they needed insulin (most Gazans are asking for money to evacuate or afford food and medicine, insulin could be needed but it's unlikely to go alone), the photos they used showed up in a reverse image search, and the names once you clicked on their PayPal were not Palestinian or Arab (according to Google, the names of the people I personally got were from Kenya and Uganda, but the same method could be used by people from anywhere else).

Of course it's important to check that any donation you make goes to the person/organization you want it to go to. And that's why I included the verification link. Sending an ask like this to someone trying to get them to publicly post your message spreading the false idea that a very real person with a very real family trying to survive a genocide is a bot or a scam shows, in the best case, that you are careless and didn't think much before acting and, in the worst case, that you are actively taking part in this genocide and contributing to the dehumanisation of Palestinians, to cutting off the little support they get from outside that gives them a chance of survival, and that you are trying to get these families killed. Whether it was on purpose or not, this is what an ignorant message like this —accusing with no proof and where you would have seen it's a real person with only a bit of research—, this is what it does: it contributes to the genocide. It gets people killed. This is a genocide, we cannot afford such mistakes.

If you have a doubt, research before making public accusations. Or ask privately about it. Instead, you chose to send this ignorant ask on Anonymous, meaning that you knew well that I would not be able to answer to you privately and that I would have to answer publicly, using me as a loudspeaker to spread your baseless rumour (a rumour that could cost a family their lives!) with all of my followers.

Of course you've gotten so many of these messages in your inbox. Gaza, even before October, was one of the most densely populated places on Earth because of Israel's apartheid regime and how it pushes Palestinians in an open-air concentration camp. And now they're all getting bombed. What are they supposed to do? Not try to survive? Die in silence? What would you do if you were in their place?

Anyway, let's all go help the family that this ask is accusing. And I recommend you make up for it and donate, too, at least some. They are very close to reaching the goal they need to afford the Egypt travel agency costs to evacuate to Egypt. Help Ahmed and Dina and their children Zeina (7 years old), Eileen (6), Yamen (4), and the baby girl born in June in the midst of war.

(Verification link: number 264)

Let's also help Samer, Shuroq, and their three children:

(Verification link: number 196)

Also please Mahmoud Al Sharif, his wife Soha, and their 4 children (ages 12, 11, 8 and newborn). Mahmoud lost an eye and fingers in the wars he survived before the current one. They are still very far from their goal.

(Verified by 90-ghost here)

"Solidarity is the tenderness of the peoples". Palestine, Catalonia always has you in our heart.

[solar-sunnyside-up]

hey, something i've been struggling with recently is i've been struggling with "finding my people" because i'm a minority in my hometown, and a lot of people... aren't. they don't understand me, and often when i try to get them to understand they seem like they fall back into the old systems they were traumatized with (elitism, classism ect.,). 1/2 -solidarity anon

Im gunna say this at the top, this is so rough and im so sorry you gotta go through this sweetie. We are so isolated and filtered into categories within our current system in order to keep that isolation and to fight solidarity and unity. Now I cannot know for 100% sure what your going through or the extend your suffering. But will say I am from and currently still live in a oil loving, god fearing, anti-LGBT, and very racist city while i was raised wiccan by a poly core family and all my gay aunts/uncles and have been dreaming of an earthship my whole life plus every summer id be stuck in an even more harsh farming community that was so small they gotntheir first street light when i was 9 and the chruch is also town hall (mayor works in a wing off of the building). So there is at least some overlap in the experiences your having.

But that being said, how I got weirdly connected to people and involved in so many projects and stuff might not work for you.

Personally? I just yelled and yelled about the injustice of the system at work, about cool forestry projects and people buying ghost towns to start up Co-loving villages. Sharing discworld and different philosophers with coworkers backed up by their fave hobby. About how terrible the conservative politics are. About how cool transit could be if we funded it. About community art projects and how cool solar glass would make things look. About drags shows and events and did you know there is A SOUP FESTIVAL? I'm autistic and have only really interacted my whole childhood with friends with ADHD so my brain is weird and won't shut up once it starts going.

As a result of my ramblings, I have gotten a lot of responses mostly ones that are positive since if they didn't agree with my absurdist philosophy ramblings or solar project ideas they'd just leave the coffee shop. If they enjoyed it, say they want to join a community garden/event or if someone was as stoked as I was about again UNLIMITED TASTINGS SOUP FESTIVAL than we'd chat about that. The thing is a lot of these things have overlap. Someone who wants to convert their lawn into a pollinators habitate prob also likes little libraries and as a result prob also likes the idea of dark sky street lights. And down the rabbit hole you go.

That being said... my best actual advice is 2 pronged.

RESEARCH and REACH OUT

I personally have done years worth of research on my city. What local events and politics are happening? Even in rural places there is at least garderns, there's engineers, there's usually a LGBT focused club. And from these spaces, you can build a network. Doing research I found out about 5 different organizations in my city (most of which was founded 40 yrs ago??) That where sustainability focused. Doing research made me realize how cool community associations could be and how I could help mine out. It also gives you all those ideas for convos.

Second, I reached out to those groups about weird ideas I had, about if I could hang up posters for them in my local area, if I could buy groups worth of tickets in advance, and than also reaching out to the ppl I already talked to and had these ppl interact. My fave example of this is T. T is an engineer who built a fully functioning solar car during his degree program but specializes in hydroponics (how we ended up talking was over plants) he than gets shown my fave farm near by and now he's building the farms hydro system and Seedling house. Writing in to newsletter ppl and showing off weird layout design. This is ultimately very anxiety indusing. What if I'm bothering them? Why should I be spamming them like this? But the secret here is-

No one will ever be mad about you showing interest in their interest once you find those ppl. They want the interaction just as much as you do.

[tojisun]

im not very knowledgeable when it comes to hockey, particularly not canadian hockey, but i've noticed a lot of people seem to not like austen matthews, why is that??

my love i will try to be impartial as i am a big fan of auston matthews but even then, take everything i say with a grain of salt. not only that, but im still not as intimate with the Leafs franchise to understand the whole reason but here's what i do know:

not including leon draisaitl's recently signed contract, auston matthews is currently the highest paid player in the NHL. a lot of people think he does not deserve it because he is (apparently) not a good enough of a player to earn what he is paid.

they said that he is inconsistent. he is an aggressive player in one game, then he is 'quiet' in another. this inconsistency has of course long-term ramifications both in the regular season and the playoffs. it is this reason why people didn't like it that he became the next, and current, captain of the leafs.

i have seen many fans, like as in leafs fans, wish it had been william nylander who had been made the next captain because they believe that willy can push the team farther than matty can.

apparently, he never gets his hands dirty which means that according to them, matty doesn't do a good job at defending his team if need be (causing a scuffle, basically.)

these are kind of the centric reasons i've been exposed to as i navigate myself around the franchise. but here's a flipside to it:

(again, this is based on hearsay) toronto is difficult to impress. the leafs are one of the titans of hockey, housing incredible players and even the cup multiple times in its franchise history. their expectations are difficult to meet - they can and do turn on their own players because they demand better than good.

that is not to say that auston matthews is the only one who faces the vitriol - hometown hero mitch marner gets it too.

despite all that, auston matthews is an exceptional player. last season, he scored 69 goals in the 81 games he's played. in his debut game, he sunk in 4 goals. he shoots from the left but also forces a goal from the other side, which forces a goalie to make a difficult adjustment. he is quick to change a shot from scoring to making a rebound, and he is able to rally the puck from their zone to their offensive zone.

also? he's hot. as hell.

i hope this answered your question!! im pretty sure i said a load of nothing because i wrote this in one seating but yea!

(now if im asked about mitch marner. well. id need a page break atp)

- this is a monologue from a part-time hockey fan, and a full-time yapper <3

[player-1]

Hell's Chicken recap (post Canto 4)

Not sure if anyone rewatched the Hell's Chicken cutscenes (especially after Canto 4), but I love the multiple hints and pain to any future Cantos. In semi-order, here's a few moments I caught:

-Yi Sang w. Samjo's infodump on the multi-winged/legged chicken delicacy of K Corp: Oh yes, I'm already aware of this (BECAUSE DONGRANG TOLD THEM IN Lo9!!)

-Don w. Bongy!Heathcliff: (Sniffles sadly) And here I was hoping to dress him up like Fixers del Artedecer Ardiente (Burning Sunset Fixers/Fixers of the Burning Art (Liu Assocation??)), there's no need to insult him so!

-Me on 20:57-22:13 after skimming Dream of Red Chamber's Wikipedia: Wtf, Hong Lu!? Now I know your family life sucks, but you don't be to be so blasé about it! You're just brushing it off like Don!! (Just check out Liu and Base ID Hong Lu for the hint :)

-Meursault w. Outis violently slapping Bongy!Heathcliff: The force of impacts is similar to a soldier interrogating a captive enemy (Outis...wtf kind of soldier were you!?)

-Sinclair w. Ryoshu insulting Gregor's cooking skills on the battlefield: :O She's speaking with full words for once! -Gregor getting a headache after Ryoshu threw down the Mr. Krabs insult.

-Outis prefers instant-made food...Enough said.

-Also Gregor: Come on Ishmael, don't listen to Rodion. You and I were as thick as thieves in the early days (Veteran bonding? Another hint of Dante going MIA before the main story or them being in the company for years before?) [25:43 Sees Ishamel join Ryoshu's side, easily hearing the pain in his voice] -I...-I feel so betrayed right now.

-Sinclair immediately understanding Ryoshu's acronyms down to a T without question (CHICK: Chirping hesitation isn't cool, kiddo and RAFTS: Restaurant already fated to shut) And many more). It's honestly ironic since book/Limbus Sinclair explains art and emotions extremely heavily while Ryoshu shortens it, but they still have that artistic appeal.

-Ryoshu channeling her inner Yoshihide and traumatizing any poor soul who witnesses her "artistic talent" (ie. Don witnessing the horrors she committed on the chicken kebab that she refuses to explain with words).

-Yi Sang getting nostalgic over spoiled milk he drank the day before and not getting sick from it, but also getting embarrassed if anyone implies he eats terribly-cooked food on a regular basis (mostly likely ate spoiled food in his captivity and probably not remembering how to cook for himself cause of Gubo): Oh honey :(

-Sinclair taking the mantle in Round 2 w. cooking (hassled by the mom group excluding Ishmael), probably because he cooked for himself (terribly though) after his family got prosthesis replacements: Oh honey! :(

-Everything about Yi Sang's potato monologue (and 48:05 for the nervous panic in his voice when Don throws it away), also his reference of shredding chicken with his hands as a custom in his hometown at 39:47 (S Corp/District 19, but there's no further info on it's culture or Singularity).

-Meursault after verbally butchering Don's dish: Yi Sang, if this is your particular taste in food, I personally ask you to throng my teeth and prong my tongue this instant. Yi Sang: ...I have no excuse. (Also on par with book Meursault being an accountant and being extremely thorough on explaining things with brutal honesty)

-The Limbus gang actually succeeding in turning a Distortion back into a human through sheer luck and bullshittery (even if it's w. Dante and Heathcliff's help, Taii and Moses will definitely have an aneurysm if they ever found out).

-Vergi spacing out the second Don kept explaining the story past going into Eubong's, and Charon taking the Bongy plush and puts it on her window! :D

If there's anything else I might've missed (or not wanting to clog up the post with a full list), feel free to comment.

[95jezzica]

Your replies are closed, so I'll send this as an ask instead. I strongly agree with your idea of "Canon-Canon Nyo Nations", where the male and female characters represent regional cultures within the same country instead of making the female nations a "dream universe" gimmick. Expanding on this idea, what do you think about OCs who represent regions of the same nation? I would think it's a logical next step because 2 characters per country still wouldn't be enough to represent all regional cultures.

[Picture ID: Jamtland send an additional ask which says: "Whoops, I forgot to include this part in my first ask about "Canon-Canon Nyo Nations". What are your ideas for which regional cultures the female Nordics would represent, and what would the differences between them and the male Nordics? Picture ID End].

Oh yeah, sorry, the replies are still turned off. I have a post which seems to summon a lot of hateful idiots, so eventually I got too annoyed by it and turned off replies.

For the rest I will preface my answer with the fact I saw you're also Swedish on your profile, but I'll likely leave some extra information for any non-Swedes who might also read this, since I mostly use Sweden as an example. Also, fair warning to everyone: Long Post. [Below "Read More"].

For simplicity sake I've also choosen to just call nyo!Sweden Svea, and our canon-canon Sweden for... Well, Sweden.

Now, I personally don't make a lot of OCs unless they're humans or I'm making a human AU. (For an example I made Finland some "AU Parents", because I got REALLY tired of people always making Finland the orphan with no other family). With that said making OCs for regions and the likes is obviously still valid.

I also agree 2 personifications are too few for many countries, but I also understand why Hima wouldn't want to draw 3-100 characters for every country. Identity within a country is complicated too, because it depends a lot on who you're talking with as you describe your own identity.

If we take myself as an example. If I was talking with someone from another country I'd probably just say I'm European and/or Swedish, and perhaps mention I live on the west coast if they ask and/or seem more familiar with Swedish geography. If another Swede or Nordic asked I'd probably mention I live pretty close to Gothenburg - and if they live nearby I might go into more details, because my lil' hometown is small enough that there's no chance even other Swedes has heard of it unless they live somewhat close/have family in the area anyway.

My point is that it'd be difficult to make a representation for all kind of national-/regional-/state- identity within a country.

However, if we once again take Sweden as an example, I think (hws) Sweden would likely represent a lot of the middle/pretty far up in the west coast. Think the old Goths, and/or possibly Dalsland, Värmland, Dalarna.

Dalarna has the bonus of having a strong identity of their own in their region, and all three are placed close to (irl) Norway. It'd make sense how (hws) Norway and Sweden got to know each other early on then, but also how they might have met (hws) Denmark early.

Svea at the other hand is someone I view more as being further north-east, likely the literal ol' Svea, and someone I headcanon to have been among the first Swedish personification(s) to get into contact with the Finnish personifications.

It's weird though, because neither Sweden nor Svea really gives off "Stockholm vibes" (sorry non-Swedes/Nordics, I have no idea how to describe what "Stockholm vibes is) - but then again they are all based on Japanese stereotypes about the Swedes, so I guess it makes sense. x)

Another possibility I can imagine is the Swedish personifications in modern days being divided into something like this:

[Picture ID: A map of real life Sweden cut into three parts. From up to down: Norrland in strawberry red, Svealand in autumn leaf yellow, and Götaland in bright sea blue. End of Picture ID].

... with perhaps an additional personification for the far north and south. However, we have to keep in mind a lot of the far north of real life Sweden's lands would still be in the ice age early on and/or simply not be Swedish - and parts of what today is the real life far south Sweden would be with Denmark instead.

[Picture ID: An edited version of the previous picture, now with almost all of Norrland and the far south of Sweden faded out, since they weren't part of real-life Sweden at this point. Only a small part of south-east Norrland remains, now coloured and part of Svealand. The names are now also edited to say "North Swe" instead of "Norrland", "Svea" instead of "Svealand", and "1p!Sweden" instead of Götaland. End of Picture ID].

The picture above is a quick edit made by me and should by no means be used as a picture of research, so obviously not exact accuracy or anything, but it's a rough estimate of what (irl) Sweden would have looked like very early on, and also roughly what I headcanon (hws) 1p!Sweden and nyo!Sweden to represent/have represented respectively.

In history the Svea people more or less forced a union with the goths, but I headcanon (hws) Svea had absolutely no interest in working with the humans leaders and basically dumped all the responsibility and work on our (hws) Sweden instead. While Sweden was forced to work more closely with royals and leaders, Svea set to truly live like their people. That's not say say (hws) Sweden didn't interact with the "common people" at all, because he's a rebellious shit in his own right, but he was still forced to take on a lot of the responsibility and work with his leaders.

It didn't help that once Christianity was brought up in Scandinavia together with a less favourable view of women, 1p!Sweden no longer had a real choice than to take on the work. I think (hws) Svea moved back in with Sweden around the time Christianity became more common in Sweden (the lands and people), too. Partly because she felt guilty over having just dumped all the work and responsibility onto (hws) Sweden, but also because it was safer to live with someone she viewed and could claim as her brother. Svea would also have started out to (secretly) help Sweden out with work around this time, which only became official closer to modern days.

For the rest of the Swedish personifications I don't have a clear picture of what they'd look like, but the personification of "south-south" Sweden (in old days more viewed as "east Denmark") is likely around the same age as Denmark, Sweden and Svea, while the personification of Norrland is much younger than the rest of the Swedish personifications. I'd say (hws) Norrland likely didn't pop up until the Swedish population grew much bigger in the north and the Sami people were pushed further and further out in their lands by the Swedish population.

.

(cough). So I know I've basically only covered Sweden so far, but this post is already getting ridiculously long, so I will cheat a bit and refer you to @ifindus for Norway's regions instead. xD

[Again, art and OCs of the Norwegian regions made by @ifindus .]

Findus fully uses OCs for the regions to be fair, so I'm not entirely sure what I would make nyo!Norway represent since I really like Findus' OCs. x') . Maybe nyo!Norway could be more specifically the Oslo area? Because Oslo Norwegians are very different from Norwegians in the rest of Norway.

As generalization I'd say most of the Nordics probably have at least 3-5 personifications though, with one of them being the nyo. For an example Denmark might be divided into Jylland, Syddanmark, Sjælland, Hovedstaden - or it'd go a bit more detailed like cutting up Jylland in North & South like most maps.

(The Faroe & Greenland would obviously also have their own personifications, btw).

.

Hope this was helpful, and sorry I didn't get to cover them all in the post! x)

If inspiration hits me I might make another posts with the rest of the Nordics in the future. \^w^/

[meltedbluecaterpillar]

Oh, yeah. I relate to that,,,I had 2 medium sized coffees today because I only slept for four hours..lets both keep ourselves hydrated and,,alive..

But yes..Ruggie not being in the hometown event gives me high hopes for his own little time to shine. We'll totally meet his grammy too,,and surely learn more about him..who would ruggie ever want to take with him in the case of a (ruggie ver) hometown event?..i dunno, id have to ponder.

On the ship topic,,,I really agree. I admit I also have a really bad habit of enjoying angst or devious(?) themes?..I love Jamil..(couldn't have possibly guessed that one huh..) so..i like devious. I really like how you explained that though. I agree now. I never really saw the ship as anything as romantic as rookvil..because I like the drama.

Now I'm lost in thought. I could go on and on for so long,,but I'll spare everyone that torture,,writing about this on my (yet to exist) new blog might suffice - 🐍

Good evening Viper... I had started my original greeting with such vigor and excitement, my eyes widened in shock. I had just finished a Monster Energy drink. I regret it only a little. We must do our best. Our health will depend on it.

I think for a Ruggie hometown event, he wants to take none of them. He cannot stomach 'dead weight' on his trip back home to make money and run errands. But based on personal preference... I would like to see Deuce, Rook, Malleus, and probably... Jamil? Deuce especially because he grew up with not amazing living conditions. Ruggie would take him along for errands since Deuce is a professional grocery shopper. I think it would be fun. The others are more... I want to see how they do in their circumstance. I know Rook is just excited to be invited... I can't remember a single hometown event he was invited to yet... Actually... Rook isn't in many events...

Oh, I understand you. I love devious ships where it is all just awful. But I also love more complex ones. It is the delicious slow burn where I cannot imagine the outcome as one or the other. So I have to wait and see. I love it. I am excited to see your blog when it is ready. I want to hear your thoughts. I want to know... I will wait patiently.

[redwoodrecords]

Oh Looordddd....whelp, now i see who's behind the card declination. And due to the amount of embarrassment I felt, as just the reader, I've chosen not to feel bad. I will not forgive that man. nope, nada.

Like who even does that and NOT tell the person? How do you just not inform them that you've been digging in their money. You literally left MC there; not a heads up before the trip, not even a heads up at drop off...just- left. them. there to just find out in what could be the most humiliating way possible for many people.

Had he said something beforehand to MC, id feel bad and understand. But he literally just...

Deep breaths it's just a story, it's just a story, it's just a story...

Lol oh yeah, this is the same person from that last ask about being embarrassed for MC. I think I subconsciously turned on anon for that one though

i think a lot of people chose not to forgive him which is very interesting to me? i truly understand it though because if i was mc i would have gotten a lift back to my hometown and demanded my dad give me a full explanation as to why and how it all happened. like no way in hell am i dealing with this alone when i didn’t even do anything wrong 😭

[quokkabite]

🐰 🐝 💗

🐰- do you believe in soulmates?

the way i was actually hoping id get this question. i have thought about this so much in say, hey, the last year and a half, and i’ve decided yes. i do believe in soulmates. platonic or romantic - i don’t think it even matters. people who feel like they were meant to be in your life no matter what, and who understand you on another level, id like to think it’s something cosmic.

🐝- describe your aesthetic in emojis

🖤

💗 - who do you miss?

listen, i miss so, so many people. i basically spend my life missing people. and i fear i am stating the obvious here, but… you and lizzy. like all day every day i miss you guys sm. i also miss my best friend in my hometown because life hasn’t allowed us to sync up lately. and last night i had a dream about a really important person to me and i haven’t seen or talked to him in so long and i miss him all of the fucking time. (he is supposed to text me soon but like… here i am… still waiting 😭)

[alivehouse]

(While sending this ask I've accidentally found out what cool wallpapers (literally) you have on your desktop blog theme.)

Well, good day, my dearest horror podcast Virgil,

I, surprisingly to myself, actually finished "I am in Eskew" and enjoyed it quite a bit (which, I guess, could have been deduced by how much I spammed in the tag) even more surprisingly, considering I'm absolutely not a horror person - I substitute horror movies with their wikipedia retellings. Unironically.

Anyway, firstly, thank you! I definitely would have never discovered it without your recommendations!

Secondly, maybe you have something else like that stashed up your sleeve? I definitely need some time to recuperate, but I would like to explore more cool podcasts. (The only two limitations: short-ish - not much longer than this one, the view of a hundred+ episodes scares me; not gorier than this one/no actual jump scares - again, I'm a scardicat.) I remember you talking about "Mabel Podcast" and at the first glance it seems neat, but I'd like to hear your comments on it first.

Thanks in advance. :)

(thank you! its a william morris thing i edited a little lol) glad you liked eskew! its been fun seeing your thoughts on it popping up in the tag, not spammy at all.

i do want to mention that the creator of eskew also has another podcast called The Silt Verses, personally i havent listened to it for weird brain reasons so not sure how well it fits your criteria but ive heard its also very good

mabel podcast is another favorite! the creators of mabel and the creator of i am in eskew were both inspired by shirley jackson's the haunting of hill house to an extent iirc, so even though the stories are very different some elements of them have a similar 'feel' to them imo. i will say that mabel is very different stylistically though (especially the earlier episodes) which in my experience people seem to either love or hate. whereas in eskew you get a pretty continuous narration from david or riyo, in mabel youre mostly listening in on a series of somewhat disjointed voicemail messages. id definitely recommend at least giving the first few episodes a go, dont get discouraged if you dont feel like you dont understand whats happening right away. all you really need to know about the story going in is that youre following Anna, whos a live-in carer for an old woman named Sally. Anna is trying to contact Sallys next of kin (the titular Mabel), but shes strangely out of reach.

ok i know you said youre not a huge horror person but if you ever are feeling a little more daring id suggest trying out The White Vault. theres a small amount of gore (descriptions of finding hearts and teeth) and some uh. wet ripping sounds in it but its really not that bad all things considered, just know that it is straight horror though. its a found footage podcast that follows a group of people whove been hired to check out a remote outpost in northern norway thats gone dead, but a storm leaves them stranded there, and as time goes on it becomes clear that they arent exactly alone. this ones a little longer i think, but tbh ive only listened to the first two seasons, it felt like a natural place for the story to end to me

and then on the complete opposite side of the spooky podcast spectrum, if you want something thats a ghost story but really not horror at all imo, i just finished listening to Midnight Radio a few weeks back. this ones *really* short, like 10 episodes that are ~20 minutes each short, so its definitely lower commitment. in this one youre listening in on a radio show hosted by Sibyl, who died decades earlier but can still be heard waxing poetic about her hometown in the dead of night.

ok LAST ONE havent finished it so wasnt sure if i should rec it but a lot of people on my dash hype up Archive 81 so i thought id mention it at least. guy is hired to listen through a bunch of creepy tapes in some archive out in the middle of no where. classic horror podcast stuff. similar to eskew in that it pivots from mostly being mostly anthology into an overarching plot as you go on

[holly-fixation]

Three... Guards? Ch 5

Summary: Tifa finds Cloud at the train station in Sector Seven. It’s the first time she’s seen him in seven years. But he’s not alone. Three silver haired boys protected him. Three silver haired boys that triggered memories of her hometown. Of steel through her chest. Of SOLDIER First Class. Of Him.

Their determination to protect Cloud was far greater than she was ready for.

Inspired by this prompt by @im-totally-not-an-alien .  

Please Enjoy!

Chapter 5: The Mission

They knew no matter how well they prepared for this mission, new road blocks waited for them ahead. First it was Jessie’s fake IDs failing on the train, making them walk along the rails to try and find their way to Sector Five’s plate on foot. Cloud wasn’t sure how many times he was willing to follow the ‘AVALANCHE dog’ before he looked for his own path. However, Tifa and Barret convinced him to keep going. And it’s not like he’d ever say no to Tifa. He would complain about it though, but even then he was far more pleasant and accommodating than he was when they were kids. He was still kinder than she expected, yet that didn't reflect his swordsmanship in the slightest. 

Cloud was a beast on the battlefield. 

Every enemy in range met their end quickly with their little party of three. Barret even made a joke of ‘where were you on our first mission’ before giving him a hearty laugh. Cloud rolled his eyes, but the smallest of a playful smirk played on his lips. Things were starting to get back on track before they wasted even more time trying to understand and activate the correct sunlamps to continue their way. Who designed something like this? This probably wasted more energy than it saved. 

Luckily, things looked more familiar when they entered the reactor. Various elevators, twisting paths, endless rooms filled with security robots and personnel, all expected obstacles they were well practiced in taking down at this point. Cloud’s SOLDIER healing was absolutely something else. At very least, Tifa swore she saw bullets that didn’t break his skin. He wasn’t a perfect fighter, but he was leagues better than any mercenary in the slums. Shinra’s defenses had certainly changed since the last mission though. But since this was Cloud and Tifa's first one, neither noticed the difference. 

Despite their skills, Cloud found himself looking back after nearly every battle. This may not be the stealthiest operation, but he kept seeing things moving at the very end of his periphery, only to completely vanish when he turned. He was understandably on edge in general, but this only added to it. If Shinra wanted to attack, they would wait until they were vulnerable, especially after destroying every machine thrown at them. And yet, he brushed the feeling off as they entered the mako chamber, convincing himself it was just first mission jitters. 

He was wrong. Very. Very. Wrong. The blobs from the corner of his eye finally slipped into sight after failing to silently climb down the ladder in mako storage. Correction: one of them failed, landing with just enough force for Cloud's SOLDIER enhanced hearing to catch. The other two were still on the ladder, but they instantly realized it was too late. 

They were supposed to be at the bar. 

They were supposed to be watching Marlene. 

They were supposed to be under the Sector Seven plate without causing any trouble, like they all agreed to. 

“What the hell are you doing here!?” Cloud’s voice boomed up the high walls of the reactor. Only after hearing Cloud’s call did Barret and Tifa turn to assess the threat. Neither one of them expected to see the three boys that saved Cloud in the middle of the mission. 

“What is wrong with you three?! Did you abandon my baby girl!?” Barret yelled next. “Are you three tryin’ to die an early death? Because if she has a single scratch on her-”

The brothers stood silently, looking at Tifa for the final questions to be thrown at them. However, the eldest’s eyes were already watery from the scolding. 

Tifa just stared in shock at the three silver haired boys in black within the mako glow of the chamber. Her hands started shaking, her eyes on the sword the youngest used. 

When they realized she wouldn’t respond, they answered the father’s questions first. 

“We left Marleen with Marle to be safe… They’re both at the apartments…” Yazoo answered first. 

“We told you we’re protecting Big Brother,” Loz spoke after swiping off his tears. “No matter what.”

“And do you have any idea how easy it is to follow you guys when you take out every security measure in the building?” 

“Don’t be smart with us,” Cloud scolded, fury in his eyes. Yes, he was kind to them before but it was borderline suicide for three ten year olds to go on an ecoterrorist mission, no matter their skills. “You could’ve been killed. Can be killed.” 

“By what- all the broken machines?” 

His mako glare sharpened. “What did I just say?!”

Shoot. They really pissed him off. His increased emotions were acting against them now. They needed to be careful with their next words. 

“We just wanted to protect you…” 

“Y’all ain’t protectin’ anyone if Shinra kills you boys!”

They all looked away, shutting their mouths from the next snippy comment to come out of their mouths. 

Cloud growled a sigh, frustratingly accepting this absolute mess of a scenario. Yet before he spoke, Tifa grabbed the back of his arm, her hands still shaking. He looked at her and all his anger vanished. Her head was down, blocking his eyes from hers with her head and her hair. She was nearly cowering, clinging to him in protection. “Tifa…?” He spoke as softly as he could. “Are you alright…?”

She should’ve been the angriest after everything these three put her through. She should’ve scolded him for his ridiculous ‘eye for an eye’ mentality, to protect them because they protected him no matter what they did. She should’ve thrown them to the first orphanage she could find long before this mission began, but he was the one that stopped her from trying. Yet she was quiet and trembling, not an ounce of frustration boiling in her. “Let’s just finish this… Please…”

I’m sick of this…

I’m sick of all of this!

The memory hit Cloud like a truck and he wrapped his arms around her in comfort. Their hometown. The fire. Her father. The reactor. 

“Let’s just set the bomb…”

He wanted to obey, but he glanced back at the three boys that weren’t supposed to know any of this. 

“It's too late now. Just set the bomb and let’s get out of here,” She steeled her voice against her emotions. 

“Okay… Yeah…” Cloud hesitantly agreed, trying not to upset her any further. “We’re too deep in this now. We have to pull through.”

“You three are gettin’ one hell of a scolding when we get back.” Barret glared at the kids again before setting up the bomb. 

“Is it a timer or do you have a remote?” Cloud questioned. 

“Remote controlled,” Barret stated almost proudly while holding up the controller. “Gives us plenty of time to get out. Especially with this extra cargo.”

The youngest brother nearly hissed, his eye twitching once at his frustration towards them and the truth he couldn't reveal. The other two just glanced away like disobedient children. 

After they set up the bomb and double checked everything worked, they headed back to the lone ladder they all came down. But the ladder quickly lifted up the second they were in reach. 

Shinra was watching them. The director of security, Heidegger literally laughed at them and put the group on the news, stating that they were not only the ecoterrorists responsible for destruction surrounding Mako Reactor One, but that they also used child soldiers as backup, brainwashing and forcing them to obey. Of course none of the boys cared about the comment, but it absolutely painted AVALANCHE in a deadly light. The director sentenced them to death and told them exactly where it waited: the only exit in the reactor.

As a group, the six members made their way through the remainder of the facility, sending sections of the incomplete mech to a defective equipment room in order to limit its attacks. The boys tried to climb directly on the rails guiding the remaining equipment to destroy each one directly, but the adults all informed that messing with the assembly line itself could let Shinra catch wind of their plan, so they jumped down and hunted for key cards in every room they entered. 

Everything was relatively normal until they all finally made it to the catwalk on the way out of the reactor. Multiple drones suddenly flew past them before projecting a cyan hologram of President Shinra himself. Regardless of the weapons before them, the three brothers surrounded Cloud and nearly growled in their battle stances. Guns out, blades in hand, fists at the ready. The drones scanned each of the adults first to give the president a perfect view of his enemies. 

“Oho. The eyes of one who has bathed in mako…” Clearly Cloud caught the president’s attention. “Which would make you a SOLDIER?”

Cloud drew his blade, the slightest scowl on his face. “Ex-SOLDIER.”

“Once a SOLDIER, always a SOLDIER. Though not, alas, for very long.” The president continued as Tifa looked to Cloud in concern, “Accelerated cellular degradation being the most common cause of death by far. This is classified, of course, but every SOLDIER knows the truth.”

Cloud’s eyes hit the ground before he forced them back up with a glare. “...That’s right.”

“Yet knowing that, you still…” He cut himself off, clearly recognizing something. “...How did you find these children?”

“It doesn’t matter how,” Kadaj snipped. 

“It most certainly does. Those are more than mako eyes. You three should go back to the lab, where you belong.”

“We’re staying here!” The eldest barked.

“We’re not your property…”

The president scoffed. “Everything involving him is ours.”

Kadaj immediately slashed the closest drone in two, rage already staining his breath. He was very tired of everything in every world circling back to him. “We’re not his either!”

The reaction made him raise an eyebrow, far more than anything else they got out of him. “Still, you’d make fine additions to SOLDIER. Where you belong.”

All of the boys nearly hissed at that.

“Think you forgettin’ someone!?” Barret finally pulled the president’s attention away, going on his usual rant about mako, the planet, and the Lifestream. The president brushed him off as pawns, his company’s propaganda spinning AVALANCHE’s little story as he saw fit. 

Despite Barret’s back talk, the time for talking was over. Heidegger took over the hologram and released the Airbuster, giving the order of execution barring the three silver haired boys. The children were to be taken alive. 

They instantly broke into pairs to take down the massive mech. Its attacks constantly shifted from destroying them head on and charging large attacks while barely within targets of long ranged weapons. Yazoo paired up with Tifa to make up for her lack of ranged options. Loz paired with Barret in order to do more damage when the mech was on the ground. Kadaj used their ‘take them alive’ order and his height to his advantage by attacking its hover engines underneath it. However, he could not survive under their heat for long, so he constantly shifted sides despite his obvious intention to stay by Cloud’s.

Was fighting alongside three small children against a mech on a terrorist mission extremely strange? Yes.

Was it as difficult as they expected it to be? Yes and no. 

Despite their intentions, the combination of their weaker weapons and their inferior strength barely allowed any significant damage. However, against a foe like this, even the slightest damage mattered over time. All six of them couldn’t fight this thing forever, and they knew more security would be on its way if the machine looked like it was failing. The faster its death, the better. However, the boys needed to be extremely careful with the downgrade of these child-like forms. One dead on attack and they’d be lucky to be out of commission. Gods this was frustrating. 

They didn’t know if they lived or died when the machine’s self destruction blew the team apart. A large section of the catwalk was destroyed in the explosion, five of them flung towards the exit, but one dangling on the opposite side. 

“Cloud!”

“Big Brother!” 

All of them ran to the closest edge to see the blonde SOLDIER holding on, unable to drop the massive sword in his other hand. 

“We don't have long to get clear,” Barret stated the dark truth first. They didn’t have the time or ability to save Cloud now.

But he was more concerned with them than himself. “Take Tifa and the boys, and get outta here!”

“We’re not leaving!” The eldest brother yelled and was immediately pulled back by Barret. “No matter what!”

“This ain't the end of the line for you or me!”

“What are you doing…?” The middle brother asked.

The surviving drones began shooting before he could answer. They didn’t have time to think before thr bomb in the reactor detonated and fire wooshed out of the entrance. Cloud had no choice but to let go. 

“CLOUD!”

None of them were ready for something like this, and only one thought fast enough to succeed. Cloud tried to use his grappling to save himself. 

Yet when it failed, Kadaj jumped. 

Both of the boys yelled their brother’s name while holding onto the only two adults that remained, reaching but unable to will their instincts and bodies to let go and chase after their brothers. Barret lifted the eldest up and grabbed Tifa’s arm.

“We have to go. Now.”

She shook her head quickly and tried to focus on protecting what she could, even if it was the boys that looked like the man who killed her father but saved her childhood friend.

* * * 

Everyone was quiet. No one spoke a word until they were ‘safe’ again with Shinra finally off their tails but at what cost?

The boys had no idea what was supposed to happen on that mission even in their own world. They failed. If they're the reason their big and even little brothers died, through this butterfly effect, then what the hell were they supposed to do now? They didn't know what to do in general, let alone with this… feeling that wouldn't go away, one that kept their eyes down and their movements sluggish. 

Tifa certainly had more of this odd status effect than Barret at least. It seemed Barret's little affirmations that Cloud would be okay only did so much to soothe her. 

Even if Cloud survived the fall, the chances Kadaj did too were little to none. Not in these bodies. Not in this world. It wasn't like they couldn't function without each other. But Loz couldn't stop tears from falling and quite honestly it was just annoying to him at this point. He wasn't sobbing or incapable of doing other tasks, but his eyes and his throat were cursed with these stuttering emotions. Yazoo simply couldn't break out of somber silence, sitting at the bar with his arm supporting his head, his silver hair brushing the counter with his occasional shift. 

Neither Barret or Tifa scolded the boys for going on the mission. They already knew exactly what they did. And Loz had a nearly soaked sleeve to prove it. 

“Come on,” Tifa pushed, placing a meal closer. Some kind of egg dish that normally looked so appetizing to them. “You gotta eat.”

They shook their heads and stayed quiet, occasionally moving a chunk of food around the plate with a fork. 

“Biggs is on his way. He'll be here in twenty,” Barret informed, finally giving them the distraction they needed. “Says he's got some info for us.”

Tifa nodded, trying to force her mind on the next task rather than the boys in front of her. She should take them to the orphanage in Sector Five. It would absolutely be better than anything she can provide while working with AVALANCHE. 

“Are you going to abandon us too…?” Though extremely small, Yazoo’s question cut deep into their hearts. Neither adult answered. 

“Why don’t you eat, and then we can talk, okay?” Tifa tried to avoid the idea, but they clearly noticed her dodge. In fact, they dropped their forks entirely and huffed into their own hands. Tifa and Barret just sighed. It wasn’t like force feeding would help either. 

Luckily, the doors to the bar opened, but they were all confused. Biggs was absolutely too far out and the sign clearly said they were closed-

Tifa’s eyes locked on the man that entered. 

He’s alive. 

He’s alive!

She ran out from behind the bar to greet him in a deadly hug for doing something so stupidly risky. But she stopped herself. 

It was Cloud, blonde spiky hair and all but… he looked different. He wasn’t wearing the SOLDIER uniform anymore. That wolf earring was definitely new, so was the wolf on his shoulder pad. And why was he carrying so many swords? He would never part with the Buster Sword. 

Only the two Remnants knew exactly who they were looking at. It was Cloud. But it was the one they knew. From their time. From their world. They recognized him instantly. And he absolutely recognized them. 

.

.

.

.

Thanks for reading!

Author’s Note: I almost googled what AC Cloud looks like before I suddenly dashed across my room. I finally found a purpose for my Cloud amiibos.

[hungeringheart]

i love how you consider that games without a space/time player /can/ be won somehow instead of immediately shutting all options down! i understand the need to follow 'canon' too, but i just can't help but think of things like, "in what ways can we bend sburb? what things could we possibly exploit in order to win without following the normal route to winning?"

one of my favourite things to ponder is what classpects would be needed to win a game without a time/space player, because there's so many choices you can go with. you could utilize witches, thieves, rogues, maids, pages, et cetera... and then pair them up with aspects like doom, hope, life, void, et cetera to create combinations that could alter the game and make it possible to win without having to follow the usual structure of a game!!

sorry for going on a ramble here, i just love how you view classpects! oh! and to top it off, what classpects do /you/ think could optimally win a sburb game without utilizing space/time players?? id love to hear what you can come up with!

Aw, thank you, for taking the time to write and for the lovely ask!

Here's the thing: I think almost any combination of classpects could hypothetically win, if you wanted them to. Narrative intent is a powerful thing! The operative concept is, what do you want to say with it exactly?

Given that "unwinnable" sessions are a statement by the game or Skaia itself towards the characters ("your timeline is doomed", "your session is void as if it had never been played"), it's really about what you want to say to that.

Some things are narratively less interesting to me than others, or I just am not sure yet how they could achieve "I refuse! I am a living person!" yet, but I really do think you could win with almost any given pair of classpects if you gave it all some thought from the POV of the characters.

Even just in two player sessions, Blood and Breath are very obvious candidates for stories where a major theme is that you can do anything if you reframe the situation and work together.

Doom and Void are great for situations where you want to examine what it actually means to lose and be destined to fail, and what it looks like to figure out some sort of path to not doing that, despite the odds, despite the sense of hopelessness.

Even Heart and Mind could accomplish it -- identity, faculties, persona and decision -- if you wanted to tell that type of story!

It's a little harder if you want to put together esoteric and unusual combinations like Mind and Rage or Light and Heart in a two-player session, but even then it's not undoable -- Mind and Rage would be a story about choices and the crushing sense that nothing is worth it, about how sometimes picking a path and trusting it is the best thing you can do; Light and Heart would be about how knowing yourself and knowing the world are intricately interconnected, and both essential to growing up and finding the way you need to be going in life.

The thing to know is really just that SBURB is a metaphor for growing up -- that's why it's rigged, that's I think the point of Lord English, he's a terrifying outside force meant to shape how you play and respond and live your life. It's possible to read him as the spectre of violence and selfishness in particularly American society, which seems particularly accessible to me because I live in the hood in Huss' hometown and, like, I get it.

The good news is you're not really ever done, and an adventure is self contained enough that it can just be growing through any period of your life (you could've done The Babadook as a SBURB game if you wanted). There's not actually an age limit for players -- nor a number limit save for what you can comfortably write. Canonically it is said that it's easier to win in numbers, and I think that says something important about community -- the kids start as weird little nerdy shits in what feel to them like inescapable bad situations, and Earth C is the product of a very long time spent learning how to live and interdepend together. (Then the epilogues blow ass all over this, but then that's what happens when the author doesn't even want to write an epilogue.)

There are basically two approaches to picking what's in your game, though, all told. One is what I'd like to call the roleplayer approach, where you think of a character first and then throw them at other people's, and all of you picked a classpect off of vibes, so now you have to figure out where to go from here. You gotta really know each other well for this to go well, otherwise it turns into playground shit -- you can't have a This of That, it's too powerful, power creep, I feel outclassed and outgunned, don't write your guys so competent, it threatens me!

But if you can get past all that, then you're all on one team telling a story about everyone's ocs that congeals naturally and organically compensates for whatever classpects y'all picked (the story will go where the story goes). The problem being of course that people are haunted by the demon ghost of pushy groupmates even when writing alone. Repeat after me: your guys are pawns of the narrative, and if you are any good at crafting narrative, it doesn't matter for the dramatic tension at all if they're all fuchsia lords and muses! "They're too OP" is a neckbeardism, what matters is that there are still difficult things to overcome!

The authorial approach is difficult because then you're doing it all alone, you don't have that randomness or really the desire to persevere if it looks weird. You've got to think about symbolism instead of stumbling into it, and that's rough! That means that you have unrestrained space to be self-critical. But you also get to decide what you're saying, and you can say it with singularity of purpose, in as many characters and scenarios as it needs.

You basically just look at the whole aspect wheel and you think, ok, what do I want to say is true about the world? Where am I going with this? How are these characters going to react? What are their arcs, how do they interrelate, what does that say about, yknow, these concepts they're enacting? What does it actually mean that canon insists there are these prerequisites, mechanically, and how can we play with that? What does that say about whoever designed the game?

Big things to wonder about! Much easier to just yes-and with your friends, but you get more control over the narrative if you buckle down and make the spreadsheet.

Thanks again for the ask! It helped me refine and think through some things as well. <:

[thelazyhermits]

since we've gotten more questions about twst itself, i've got some: have you pulled on any recent banners, and how did it go? are there any upcoming ones you're looking forward to? and do you have your fc listed anywhere? (though you might not be comfortable sharing it, which is totally understandable)

Oh yeah, last month was a busy one for me thanks to the Glorious Masquerade event and Jack's birthday. I naturally went after my best boy first and then I pulled for GM Idia and Malleus. Normally, I just pull for my fav four (Jack, Leona, Jamil, & Idia), but I'll make exceptions every now and then, wtih GM Malleus being one of them cause he's so pretty XD

Anyway, regarding how it went, I got all the cards I wanted thankfully. I had to hit 100 pity for Idia, but fortunately, Jack & Malleus both came home under 50 pulls.

There are plenty of banners I'm looking forward to since the events that the ENG server hasn't covered yet are all so good. Plus, I've got Idia's birthday in Dec, and I definitely want that card since I love ponytail Idia. Plus, his duo is with Leona, which will make his vignette a fun read haha

I definitely wanna go after the Leona SSR for his hometown event, and I'd like to pull for Sebek's New Year's SSR cause I love him. Plus, I've heard that we'll need plenty of good Sebek/Silver cards for the later parts of Book 7 which will japparently be like those titan battles from Book 6 but even worse if you can believe that lol 😂

I'd love to pull for Kalim's tsum SSR when the second tsum event comes to the ENG server since those cards are all so adorable, but I probably won't since I need to save for other cards.

The bunny Deuce SSR for his hometown event is also incredibly tempting, but depending on when it comes to the ENG server, I might have to pass on it.

Even though Lilia/Floyd aren't in my favorites list, I will definitely pull for the Stitch event SSRs, more specifically Floyd's, cause Lilo & Stitch was my favorite Disney movie as a child, and I still have a huge soft spot for Stitch. That's probably the event I'm looking forward to the most ^^

I don't have my player ID listed anywhere since no one has ever asked for it until now and it honestly never crossed my mind that anyone would wanna add me as a friend lol

But I'm totally fine with sharing it! It's: BRDutJDy 😊

[valiantponds]

[ID: Image 1: A reddit post in r/relationship_advice, by u/ThrowRA62459182.

Title: “My (25F) boyfriend's (26M) sister is weirdly obsessed with him, he's taking her on holiday and I don't know how to convince him it is super weird?”

Post: “I have been dating my boyfriend "Mike" for just under 18 months. Our relationship has become really serious, we have even started to discuss things like marriage, children, etc. We moved from England to Wales about 6 months ago because I got a job opportunity that required us to relocate. He was able to covert to working from home so has stayed employed by his old company.

We now live about 70 miles away from our hometown. Because it's so far we rarely visit home, maybe once every 6 weeks or so. Whenever we visit we stay with Mike's parents and every time we go his sister is incredibly obsessed with Mike and won't leave him alone. It's to the point where it's really weird and almost like she has some weird romantic feelings for him. I've brought this up to Mike and he says I'm being crazy, but l'm not. For example, she will snuggle up to him on sofa, so I have to sit somewhere else. She will ask for him to take her shopping to places that I don't like. She'll make him take her to restaurants and they'll have fancy meals together. It is SO weird how she treats him like a boyfriend.

They have a holiday to Spain booked for this summer holiday to the town where Mike grew up, they booked this before we were dating. But it is just them two going and it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. I first asked for him to change the booking so I could come along as well, I said I would pay for the extra obviously. He said he contacted the travel agents but they weren't able to change the bookings anymore and that they couldn't book a separate package for me because the hotel was booked up.

Yesterday, I told him I think it is really weird that he wants to spend two weeks alone with her in a foreign country and when I said this to him he blew up at me and kicked me out the house. Like genuinely kicked me out the house for just questioning him about this which has made me feel it's even more weird than I thought. We ended up having a huge argument, like the biggest we've ever had. And now I am considering booking a separate hotel nearby the one they're staying at just so I can keep an eye on her. I have been texting him and ringing him and he hasn't answered or responded to me at all.

I don't understand how he doesn't see this is weird, especially considering how obsessed she is with him as I mentioned earlier. It just makes me feel sick and I don't know what to do. How do I express to him that this is not normal? How do I show him there is something weird about how his sister treats him?”

Image 2: Under the read-more on this tumblr post is another screenshot, this time of comments under the original reddit post.

helendestroy asked, “how old is the sister?”

OP responded, “She's nine, but will be ten this year.”

This response is at 915 downvotes. End ID]

[pwblogarchive]

December 2006

December 3, 2006

“status”

yesterday i fell backwards through a window- sure it was sugarglass and light wood.still felt the nerves slip.been sleeping 3 hour nights.i love watching people sing and speak and write about the people and things that they love.it makes me feel regular again.gave up on love when i started seeing about it in gossip rags.gave up on god when i realized one day my father was gonna die.gave up on myself too many times to count- you could trade mistakes for sheepand count me away forever at night.thanks for never giving up on me.even when you truly should have.and most of our incoherrent thought is wasted on whether it will mean more to stay or to go. if we can get home before the light hits our bedroom.

December 3, 2006

“a penny for your thoughts”

im sensing some antidote in the way the world has been speaking to me.but im all heart with these fingers stuck in my ears-playing scenes from my childhood so loud that i cant hear whats happened to me.you cant fly these wings, you cant sleep in this box with me.somewhere theres a backroom for us to be swapping spit in. a ditch for me to be forgotten again."there are plenty of fish in the sea" quip pretty fisherman on boats in stocked lakes and fish farms.do you think about me when you see the moon in the afternoon?"shape up or ship out"im nailed and boarded up in a box addressed to somewhere else.of all gods jokes, i am the most cruel- i will make you forget your headand your rulesand your friendsand your faithwe are bricks on gas pedals.we are the ink on forged checks.i will make you mine and then forget you.my head is too crowded for the company.can we go back to how it was?before there was a world out the front door that got off on being down.stockpiled good fortune and am ready to wait out the storm.i want you in my after 12am veins.lately it all just feels like looking up through ice in a frozen pond at red cheeked families skating, carefree.to be honest, even though im nodding off in airport lounges-id rather lay my head on a curb somewhere with you than any of the rest of it.and the universe doesnt care about luck or headlines.someone whispered "make yourself" in my ear once.steal me away from all of this.make yourself.

12/03/06 Q&A

question

I was just wondering, how much profanity can be expected on the new album?

answer

not too much more than what you hear in “arms race”- though i have a mouth like a sialor. i tend to write in more hyper sexualized metaphors- nothing that would warrant a sticker or anything tho…

question

who you like better.. old pete or new pete?

answer

people always seem to be in a constant state of flux. noone stays the same forevr but the change never seems to happen overnight. old pete got grounded alot and stuff but to tell you the truth ive never cared too much for either. in all honesty.

question

pete, you guys owe the midwest big time you tottaly skipped us on the FOE tour…you arent playing a show in iowa or chicago… =[

answer

duh like wed ever space out on our hometown, like we dont have something super special planned just for you that is NOT part of the tour—- that goes for a couple of places we are “skipping”- have a bit of faith. we try not to let you down…

question

Push-up bras: in or out in 2006?

answer

im not wearing them anymore this year, so i guess no.

December 4, 2006

i want to fall in love with someone who can speak parseltongue.

- xo

December 8, 2006

minus : bill and teds excellent adventure was almost halfway done when i got home. and i wasted my night thinking of someone who will never understand me.minus/plus:i cut off my hair and jumped through a sheet of glass for our new video. plus: when napoleon eats the huge banana split in bill and teds: ziggy piggy ziggy piggy. i got an igloo dog house and fake snow for hem to play in. way more fun than whatever else i oculd have been doing. going to see panic tommorrow.

- xo

December 12, 2006

5:31am

i cant explain the feeling that has been exactly the same since the first moment you bobbed your head, had your spit shoot out of your mouth when singing along, or been crush on the railing on the front of the stage.everything else aside. the flashes, the numbers, everything- i hope i am judged and remembered only by how you have felt and sung along.it is a testament to who i wish i was and am always striving to become. because as much as we saved you- you have saved me.the shows feel the same. i was worried. but a smile or a wink reminds me that we are still part of the same machine that noone else understands.sorry if this is corny but these were the thoughts going through my head as i iced my back today after the show. if i fall apart, if we didnt sell a single record- this was still the best adventure story ever written. and i am endlessly grateful for that. ill now go back to being a douchebag.i think youre gonna like the new video.... let us know if youre hearing arms race on the radio by you.... just putting the final touhces on the record- yeah we know its like shopping for presents on xmas eve. but oh well. we dont want to let anyone down, not ourselves or you.xo.sleep fast, dream hard.ps i miss my dog.

- xo

Dec 14 2006 

02:26:00

dear you,

sometimes we get caught up in riding the moment, good or bad. mental health or our bodies. usually its never as bad as it seems in our own heads or in those seconds when it seems like noone else can empathize. but the truth is, as reluctant as we are to admit it- there are strains inside of us that make us exactly the same. together and alone all at once. crashing thoughts like chemistry. playing these club shows has been like heaven for me- its the closest i can get to being that little band again- and i love every minute of it. its exciting and crushing- pins and needles everywhere in anticipation. seeing the same old faces on the barricades but with new smiles. i have high hopes that you will come with us on this record if only because i feel like i/we owe it to you. i listen to the songs over and over again and hope that they hit you in that same spot but in a brand new way.

post video: my back will be okay,so will my hair (haha as okay as it ever was), i am in love with my band more than anything else on the planet. i hope you like the video.

i feel like a hack giving advice to you on the q & a when the truth is, i dont really have a clue to get through life on my own.i havent been able to sleep since we left on tour this week- my question to you- what do you do to fall asleep?

thanks for always being there. even when you probably shouldnt.

it puts me at ease knowing that someone else doesnt get it as much as i dont get it.

December 14, 2006

“be my unholy, my one and lonely. (the inside of my head, unfiltered).”

computer broke. back broke. love broke.

but the ship is gonna look pretty at the bottom of this sea.

my memory is a steel trap.

your face has been filed away- to be scrutinized later.

to be despised.

to be loved.

to be sought.

to be dreamt of.

i am the inside of "i dont care".

right in the middle.

staring at you.

i have you read before you even say your name.

except when im wrong

and my whole world tips on end.

"i loved everything about you that hurts".

everything i love about you is a mess- is the reason you cant get through your days.

i keep the tv on loud in hotel rooms so i dont feel alone.

i wear scarves and hoods cause theyre the only poker face ive got left.

in my head i smash mirrors and break palm readers' hands.

i love to write of sex and bodies pressed against eachother- but i am not a closer and never will be, i cant get my mind to shut off long enough to make moves. id rather remember the smell of your hair and the way you faked like you were too drunk to drive home.

id rather break you down.

i dread human contact but cant stand to sleep alone- two parts of me that are constantly at war with each other.

every single mirror is a trick mirror. not just the funhouse ones. we see what we want.

i wish i could live a billion years just to evolve beyond love.

only the science of that doesnt really add up, and besides i am addicted to it.

if you cut me open i am the single most regular person that has ever existed.

it scares me.

it electrifies me.

i have put my belief in god in a sort of holding pattern- i close my eyes hard and want to believe. just because this cant be it. but im not ready to commit. keep flying. one of these days were gonna run out of fuel.

the famous < the infamous.

i want to become better than i am.

i want cures instead of houses.

and hope instead of hype.

only its all so big that i dont even know where to start.

birth and death are just the bookends, no one explains how to find happiness in between.

my mood changes before i finish whole sentences. hence the fragments.

if anyone ever knew the whole truth im pretty sure they would lock me up and throw away the key.

i dont like to talk or play certain songs because they are just an unhappy blur in my life when somewhere inside of me i was sure id be dead before anyone ever heard them.

i wish jimminy cricket was my best friend.

i think hed keep me on track.

its no fun hating someone who hates themself so much more.

youre just an amateur.

you cant complain about your back and then jump off of high things.

well you can but then you just look silly.

my attention span, my temper, my faith and my height are all pretty much just short.

if i ever really had three wishes i am sure id waste them on ruining three peoples lives.

disappointing people is my thing baby, find a new gig, this town aint big enough for the two of us.

i have a love/hate relationship with being forgotten.

i fall asleep on the keyboard all the time, i think it is of some comfort to me.

i cant wait to meet the person i will want to grow old with.

posted by xo @ 12:29 AM

December 16, 2006

2:57am

Have heart, willing to travel.

- xo

December 16, 2006

come on just let me make out with one of your friends and we'll call it even

caged all the free spirits.lets make them shiny so we see them glisten on the ocean bottom.well take your flaws and polish them as good as new-that is except for jealousy, theres been a recall on that one.expect version 2.0turned the corners of my eyes out as though they were my pockets, as i pass by men sleeping in boxes looking for loose change.fix me or forget me. at this point im going for whichever is easier.im guessing i look like i just got off a bender cause everyone keeps saying "you really should get some rest".like that was the problem.it feels like a surgeon who cant cut himself open to save his own life.going AWOL from ghost towns.look into mirrors-"wipe that smile off your fucking face."my dreams are all backyards in the suburbs and you.and whatever happens in between just make sure our plots are matching and next to eachother.its kind of tough being a people pleaser when you arent too fond of people in general.on steroids for the back- no, not the cool kind. though one of the side effects is dementia.living out of a suitcase changes your outlook on the world.its hard to imagine a time when any of this made sense.a flight.fizz of tonic water.clicking of hotel room keys."ive never done this before"s.you need oxygen tanks to climb the mountains i have made of these molehills.keep me away from the inside of your head.

December 16, 2006

here's to fresh starts

Today was one of the longest ever for me.I have no explanation. Except that relief can come from the last place you'd ever expect.Sometimes the people you expect to be there are no shows. Especially when you're on the tile floor heaving.I am ready to be me again.I miss my puppy. I think you dreamt me alive.

December 18, 2006

love/hate

I am sur ei have been loved. I have obsessed over love. the kind of love of getting in and out of trouible. I have hoped for love that is beyond you beiung caught by me or me trying to slip through the cracks. I hope for a love that is like astronomers who desribe distant planets. Even as experts it is a too far off to even properly calculate no matter how much you adore it. And I am no expert. When was the last time you felt proud of me? Ask myself when was the last time I did anything worth your pride? When was the last time I was moved, not like a piece in a board game but truly moved. When was the last time I didn't see the world in an "you always stick your neck out" or "can't catch a break" kind of way. You are the kind they cut off ears for and start wars over. You are a distant planet, noone would get from afar. You are the dream that I can't remember but can't forget. You are the trap door magicians never reveal. You're my last trick. You're my grand finale.

December 18, 2006

“diamonds into coal.”

i am a terrible typer on a sidekick as proven in the previous post.

i hate hotel room life.

i hate doing interviews.

i hate reading interview i have done.

i am overdramatic.

i am overly pessimistic. i only see the worst in everything.

but i smile and nod along anyway.

i dont believe a word anyone says to me.

but id really like to believe in everything.

this list is boring. i miss my dog.

December 19, 2006

being in new york brings back strange memories of fall. i am really excited for everyone to see the new video tommorrow. though i am completely bummed out to see people selling tickets for ridiculous amounts of money for the friends or enemies tour. the whole point of this tour was for us to play some small rooms with our dedicated fans. i dont really think there is anything we can do legally about people who are taking advantage of this. the only thing i can think of is that we will go around venues before the show and try to give out a few tickets for free (i doubt we will have many extra as most have sold out). dont feed into this. we will keep playing smaller shows and secret ones- as well as a bigger spring tour. i promise you will get a chance to see us. we are going to go everywhere. please dont let these vultures get you down.

- xo

December 20, 2006

to only you:there was this girl- a doll. hanging and dancing on strings. black hair and smiling. she lived just off of a town called naivety... some place i have driven through from time to time. and i never had an idea. cut the strings so we could run down the street under trees and roll in the grass. never meant for it to become what it did in so many different ways. never meant to always leave the driveway headed one direction and never knew what waited when i returned. only that her eyes were the lights in the windows that i pulled up to in the snow. slipping off the ends of icy roads at nights racing home through the night no matter what. and the miles got father and farther in between. and i couldnt ever figure myself out to save a thing. but now i cut those strings and she is forever dancing or lying or waiting in the lit windows for vans and buses that came less and less. and i wrote the harshest words and she wrote the harshest words. she turned from a doll into a girl and i from a boy into a monster and back into a boy now and again. eyes always red and puffy. pride always on the line. things were much simpler when she was on strings for her i think. things were much simpler when the van only went so far. before i had to press a picture of her and paste it on dashes and inside of bunks everywhere. i cant explain how i got here. it doesnt make any sense. she could follow the articles and videos or my pieced together stories. or a dog. or a dream. or words that make half sense sent in the middle of the night. and even when im telling the truth it doesnt matter cause the phone is always dead. and i am always 30,000 feet in the air flying somewhere. but i keep the warmest memories close to my heart even when im at payphones and want to cut my insides out,, dry them up and mail them to her. "im sorry" doesnt matter anymore. the words have no meaning. im sorry i cut the strings and ran away. now when i come to look for her i dont know where to begin. its hard to not say "its all my fault" but it goes through my head over and over so i cant sleep with out the AMBIENce of my bed and the puppy. bane songs. boomerangs. badnews. arkansas. goodbye love i didnt know you well or maybe too well.

- xo

December 24, 2006

they say this thing between us is getting old, but i think of it more like vintage love.

im like one of those movies you buy in a hotel with every button but rewind.have at it.your jokes.your ring tones.it doesnt matter.i cant ever get the right words to the right people.lying on the side, tears fall from your left eye into your right.filling it and spilling over. and so on.spilling out. but not pretty like in the movies.phones are always dead.white lights hanging on houses, breath in the air-everything about right now reminds me that i am all alone.and how terrible i am because of the thoughts that run through my head.like im pretty sure i could get some sleep if you were dead and gone.but not in a "drop dead" kind of way, more like you couldnt fuck with my head anymore.a snow day on giving a fuck about anything.sit here and stare at the television because thats what im supposed to do.forget to eat.sit in the roped off corner of a club because thats what im supposed to do.forget to care.and i just want to write a story or a song that makes everyone forget their troubles but im not too sure that i have it in me.hot spots become luke warm.i just want one person to know me completely before i die.i want maternity wards on stage for the delivery.spent the afternoon in an mri- its like preparation for lying in a coffin forever. it was a fear i havent experienced since i was young. the shaking and the sounds and the closeness of it all. everyone loves an underdog. every dog will have its day. top dogs. all dogs go to heaven and such....

December 25, 2006

he said "i brought the hoody back all them other boys dont know how to act"

when i was little i wanted to be max from where the wild things are when i grew up.kind of bonkers, cause he was just a kid too.

12/25/06 Q&A

question

is it true you and andy had a fight? and now fall out boy is breaking up?

answer

nope. not breaking up anytime soon. contrary to whatever stupid things have come out of any of our mouths near journalists. we are currently doing better than brad and angelina- no break up in sight.

12/28/06

question

dear pete i hope you liked your christmas i know i did i got the clandestine bag i wanted and tickets to the red hot chili peppers concert i just wanted to say i look up to you because you let me down every time i needed help i asked you because i didnt know who to turn to my older brother being the jerk he is never helped me in any way and you never answered any questions with any substance anyways i dont know how many times i posted my questions but i digress i learned that you cant depend on the people you look up to, to help you out with advice i learned to help myself out and just face my problems and if i make a wrong turn well ill learn from that too so i just wanted to thank you for making me that much more independent i still love fall out boy sooo much too much in fact or so ive been told im not just another fan that listens to you guys and asks you stupid questions i am a fan that loves your music and i know not to depend on you for advice cause you cant help me i can only help myself sorry if im dragging on but im trying to get my point across im not sure if you will ever read this one im pretty sure you wont and im okay with that cause that will prove my point ill give you three trys to answer cause i dont know how your answering process works three cheers for questions with no substance -sincerely me *strike two*

answer

glad you had a good christmas. as far as answering questions- i miss alot of them- either do to timing or that i didnt feel capable of answering or whatever. usually i answer whatever sticks out to me. sometimes goofy ones, sometimes serious ones. we as a band try to be role models the best that we can. im sorry that you felt let down. its great to be independent and i think its awesome that this question wasnt a “fuck you i hate your band cause you didnt answer my question”… it sucks to feel skipped over i know that. im glad that it sounds like youre doing well. hope your family situation has gotten better.

question

i was watching release the bats and was wondering if your parents had seen it and what they thought of it. i was oddly fascinated yet disgusted. nice job

answer

i think my mom thinks its funny. my brother and me have been doing stuff like that since we were little- so its not too shocking.

question

Since your famous to some people. Would you ever like Wierd Al to make a song about you and the rest of the band? If so, what do you think he would sing about you and the band?

answer

we grew up on weird al. we’d love the honor of being mocked in a song of his- i think maybe “where is your beer tonight? i hope it is a heineken”