#like im in college i don’t have enough money to pay for this :(
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chheese-mmmhh · 7 months ago
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am i hoping for bad things to happen to watcher? no!!! absolutely not!!! i really hope they continue to do great and pull in more people HOWEVER do i foresee bad things happening? yeah for sure…like just on a business level this was a horrible move and i have such mixed emotions because i WANT good things for them but that just…won’t happen
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conflict of sticking with my environmental planning degree plan and a potentially more stable/well paying job vs wanting to go for an arts degree in literature analysis and writing and history and culture because i love it so so much but know it wont be considered ‘useful’. FIGHT
#like. did i pick this. yes.#but only because i like plants#and i like outdoor spaces#and when doing research it was a well paying and open field job-wise#however#while planning my courses i was looking under my ‘dicipline based writing’ requirement#and while i know i need to take something related to my major#oh my god#masterworks of world literature#fairytales then and now#enchanted worlds (course on germanic folk tales)#a course entirely on the age of reformation#a whole course on banned books#world cinema#politics of food and sex#extinction. an entire course on the extinction process. it goes into fossils and cultures and ethnic groups and languages and#endangered species and human extinction. that sounds so fucking cool and also extremely depressing#like. i wanna take all of these. i wanna learn!!!#but noooooo i have to pay thousands of dollars and deal with an extreme amount of stress with competing coursework and thinking about future#career paths. like. ok it’s late and these are late night thoughts. but i wanna be able to just take classes like these. and learn.#why do i have to be working towards a degree. why does there have to be an end goal. why can’t i just learn and write essays#why did they make learning stressful#and like. all of these are awesome. but realistically woudlnt work with my major. at all.#i could take extinction but there’s another course that fits my major way better that i /should/ take#me rambling#i think it’s funny there’s also a course called capitalism and debt. they just tell you don’t go to college because they take all your money#anyways. hoping that i get over it#or that i get a well enough paying job that i can take college courses when im old and still want to learn#edit: THEY ALSO HAVE A COURSE CALLED TALES OF HORROR#HISTORICAL SND POLITICAL CONTEXT OF HORROR STORIES
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txt-trash · 1 year ago
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clever girl | choi soobin
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summary: you’ve only ever viewed choi soobin as your rival in school. he was cute and sweet at times but for the most part he usually acted cold toward you—or at least tried to. out of nowhere you hear about his grades dropping and in an effort to save your only motivation to push yourself harder, you accept his persistent offer to tutor him. you quickly learn he had an ulterior motive to always get you to spend time with him and despite how mean you think you might be, Soobin loved it.
➣ college au, smüt, fluff, enemies to lovers [but it’s one-sided]
➣ academic rival!soobin x f!reader [she/her, afab]
➣ 13.8k words
warnings: smut. oc is kinda mean to soobin. soft jealousy scenes. soobin asks oc to tutor him. really clingy. super cute. the smut is… nashty lowkey. heavy on foreplay. oral [both receiving]. handjöb. oc sits on his face. virgin soobin/experienced oc. oc gets jealous at times too. oc is kinda possessive. sub/dom themes but I swear soobin is a switch. breastplay. missionary. no condom. a lot of plot. multiple orgasm. soobin got that cream im sorry. soobin is a known perv. oc got big boobs. soobin is very obviously a boob guy. oc is lowkey dom, aftercare bc soobin cries. oc calls him a perv, dirty talk. soobin is best boy but also brattiest boy.
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You never considered yourself a particularly smart person. You weren’t gifted — as teachers would say — but you weren’t dumb either. You rode the fine line of somewhere in between but you also studied your ass off to get good grades so you could get a scholarship to the college of your dreams. It’s for that reason specifically that Choi Soobin drives you absolutely insane.
You’ve known him for two years but not close enough to consider him a friend. If anything you consider him the opposite of a friend. For the past two years he’s been your number one contender in class. He’s really smart, like book smart but lately he’s been plummeting his grades and that only seems to piss you off more. He’s the reason why you would push yourself so hard to be number one but now that he’s barely trying it’s not as fun. You’re a competitive person.
So, when he approached you today asking you if you could please tutor him you seriously stopped to think about it. If you tutored him then you could possibly have your competition back but tutoring him would also mean having to help him and he did not need your help. You knew he was smart enough to learn things on his own and he’s just in some sort of stump.
“Why don’t you hire one of those expensive tutors I know you can afford?” You asked him after pondering on it for damn near two minutes. You stood just outside the library where he had practically ambushed you before you could make it inside the building.
Soobin was one of those rich guys you weren’t so fond of. He had money, he didn’t have to work hard to get good grades and he could afford to go to any school he wants to while you have to work double as hard to do anything. Or course it’s not his fault but for him to ask you to tutor him when you know for a fact he doesn’t need you to just really bothers you.
He looked a bit lost by what you said, looking a bit bored like you’re the one holding him up instead of the other way around, “I don’t know, I figured you could help me out since we’re in the same major.”
You huffed out in annoyance, “Am I going to get paid?”
His eyes widened just slightly but you couldn’t if he was in surprise or in disbelief, “I guess, however much you want, I need the help.”
A small sigh left your lips as you rolled your eyes, “No you don’t, but whatever, if you pay me, I’ll think about it.”
“Can I get your number then?” Soobin asked, already taking his phone out. You didn’t say anything as you typed in your number and before he could say anything else, you left for the library.
He watched you leave without a smile on his face, keeping up his unamused act until you turned your back to him and his lips couldn’t help but curl up in a smile. Soobin knows it’s a bit weird for him to ask you to tutor him. You’re just one year younger than him but you take most of the same classes so he figured you were his best option.
And also… maybe he dropped his grades on purpose to have an excuse to talk to you but that’s something he’ll never admit to your face.
It all started two years ago. He had already been in school for a year or so and he was just soaring by. You were right when you said he could just hire some expensive tutor to help him but he never really needed it. He was book smart even though sometimes he lacked common sense in the real world. Growing up he had it all, tutors, piano lessons, private schooling, et cetera. He was a smart kid all the way until his third year of University.
Well… he’s still smart but things are different now. He’s spent the last two years practically racing you in classes you shared to do better like that would impress you but it didn’t work. Then, he tried being cold to you like you were to him but he could never do it right. It only seemed to push you away and after a while he realized the only reason why he did it was because he wanted to get a rise out of you. You just won’t notice him no matter how hard he tries to get you to and if this is the only way he’ll get you to talk to him more then he’s going to do it.
“So, did it work?” Kai asked, walking up behind Soobin and scaring the life out of him. Soobin released a loud yell that heads turning in his direction but he barely notice as he whipped around to face his friend, “Did what work?”
“Your little scheme to get Y/n to talk to you,” Kai said as he walked toward the library with Soobin on his tail, “What scheme?”
Kai stopped and gave him that look that told Soobin the gig was up, “You’ve been working on this for weeks now, you think I wouldn’t notice? You used to tutor me and now you’re saying you need to get tutored by the one person who seems to want nothing to do with you?”
Soobin cut in front of him to reach the door first as he swung it open, “No clue what you’re talking about. I’ve been struggling in class lately, probably stress over the internship this summer.”
“Right…” Kai rolled his eyes following his friend into the library, “Or the stress of getting ignored by Y/n no matter how hard you try. It’s been two years, pack it up already.”
“How do you know Y/n ignores me?” He asked getting into the elevator with his friend to get to the next level where more computers and desks were. Kai shrugs, “I mean it’s pretty obvious.”
It took days for you to get back to him and he waited anxiously to see what you would say. He didn’t want to blow up your phone because he had a cold image to uphold but every time his phone dinged he checked if it was you. By the third day he had almost given up hope until the simple text you sent nearly made him burst into a million fireworks.
you: meet me outside the library tomorrow
He got there earlier than intended but he acted like he didn’t. He had done at least two laps around the tall building just waiting for you to arrive and when you did, you said nothing to him. You only walked into the building and headed straight to the elevators like he wasn’t even there.
“It’s raining.”
Jesus Christ.
So stupid, Soobin thought as he turned away from you. This is what happens when he tries to make small talk with someone who sort of hates him. He still doesn’t get why you don’t like him much but he assumes it has something to do with your grades. You’re both art majors and have to take similar prerequisites so you see each other a lot. You’re both also at the top of the department and practically battling for the same summer internship so he thought taking a step back might’ve made you happier but it seemed to have the opposite effect.
You looked at him for a second and when he wondered if you would say something you just looked back down at your phone like he wasn’t even there. This elevator ride felt like it would never end. He knows it’s only been a few seconds but it feels so suffocating.
“Did you change up your hair? It looks good,” he said cautiously and you finally looked at him again. He didn’t expect a thank you or anything but maybe a smile.
All he got was; “Why are you talking to me?”
“It was like this last time we talked,” you finally said and looked forward again.
The elevator dinged and he released a breath he didn’t even know he was holding in until he was off. The two of you walked down the hall with you a couple paces ahead of him in complete silence.
Suddenly you turned around to face him as he stumbled back a step in surprise when you said, “I like the black hair, it’s different from the blonde.”
He absentmindedly touched his hair as a smile grew on his face, “Thank you.”
Your brows furrowed, surprised that he was even smiling at you. Usually he acts just as cold to you as you do to him and that’s why you barely acknowledge him nowadays. You knew he wasn’t a bad guy but he always had a smug face when he came out on top in class and it drove you insane. He would even laugh sometimes when you would stumble over your words during a presentation and make fun of you, not even caring if you heard or not.
Of course you didn’t know he was giggling because he found you so cute even when you made mistakes.
Soobin happily followed you to an empty table, just happy to be there and ignored the hand you had outstretched to motion for him to sit across from you just so he could sit next to you instead.
You just looked at him unamused as his smile dropped, “What? How am I supposed to see what we’re doing if I’m sitting all the way over there?”
You released a sigh, “Alright, did you bring your last exam?”
Soobin nodded his head, reaching into his huge backpack to retrieve his laptop and work. He quickly opened his laptop and got onto the school website app to find his most recent Psychology exam. He knew you were in that class too even if you took it at different times [he only signed up because of you and got the time wrong].
You looked at his laptop where a fat 65/100 score was typed in red that made you gasp, “Soobin?! How?”
“I don’t know,” he whispered, “I’ve been stressed, can’t pay attention well.”
Soobin was looking at you with soft eyes, unable to help himself from looking over what you wore today. He hasn’t seen you all day aJust as you opened your mouth to scold him, a high pitched feminine voice cut you off, “Binnie?”
You both turned in your seats, a cute brunette with hair just above her shoulders dressed in a cute coquette style smiled at him sweetly, “I thought I recognized you.”
You knew her well too, you used to call her Soobin’s little sidekick in a class you shared last semester. She always followed him around complimenting him over every little thing he did and laughing at all his jokes, even the ones that weren’t funny.
“Hi Jia,” Soobin said as he looked back down at his laptop. Jia smiled before sliding her gaze over to you, “Hi Y/n.”
“Hey.”
She cleared her throat, “So, Soobin, good thing I found you, I’ve been meaning to ask you if you’re free any time soon.”
“Um,” Soobin look at you, “For what?”
“Oh!” Jia blushed, “Um, I’ve been having software problems and I know you’re a game wizard so I figured you might know how to fix it.”
She already had her laptop out and you watched as she pulled up a chair from a different table to sit on his other side and he looked just as taken back to be sandwiched between the two of you now. Soobin didn’t say anything as he took her laptop once she showed him what’s wrong and he hurried to fix it. His lips were parted in concentration yet his dimples still showed and you couldn’t help but look at him over. You never once thought Soobin was ugly, he had to be one of the most attractive guys you’ve ever seen but you would never even think about it. If anything it’s a bit too late to imagine you and Soobin being anything more than rivals or even tutor and student. It would just be too much.
She smiled leaning into him, "Thanks, it's like you're the only one who knows how to fix it."
"Then you should probably learn how to do it yourself for when he’s not around," you responded out of the blue, flashing Jia a tight smile, "I could teach you but it's just a troubleshooting problem and it doesn’t take a brainiac to figure that out."
"I'd rather have Soobin teach me," Jia smiled looking back at Soobin who looked down at his own laptop to hide the fact that he was furiously blushing at how snappy you sounded. You smiled watching him ignore her, the jealous immature side happy he's not giving her much attention but you couldn’t understand why.
“You hear that Soobin?" You asked, nudging him with your knee, he released a breath stopping what he was doing and waiting for you to talk. Just like that, he didn't ignore you at this moment. "Jia wants you to teach her how to fix her own laptop, she’s taking advantage of your kindness, y’know."
Jia went to argue but the damage had been done. Soobin wouldn’t disagree with you, maybe you were right. He did always get bothered by all the girls who asked him to help them with something and he always felt bad saying no. In the end, half of the girls would use it to flirt with him and compliment him every chance they had and it made him uncomfortable.
Even if what you had said was a bit of a lie and probably more beneficial to you than him, Soobin was on your side — even if you sounded a bit mean, "Sorry I'm too busy but if you take it to the tech lab I'm sure they'll help you."
"He's too busy," you repeated smugly looking up at her again. You’re telling "Oh, I understand," Jia sighed, "Soobin are you doing anything? Maybe we can meet up and do some work."
You couldn’t help but scoff, Soobin immediately looked at you as you moved just a fraction away from. You looked annoyed and he knew it was once again because of him. He asked you to tutor him and yet here you are having to watch another girl try and take him away.
"Um, I don’t know, I’m kinda doing something with Y/n right now and I don’t know how long it’ll be," Soobin said mindlessly, eyes glancing in your direction like you would reward him for being blunt, he turned to you, "Can we continue?"
You stared at him in surprise. This is not how you expected this moment to go. You were almost certain that was thrilled at the idea of ending this and leaving with someone he appears to be close to. Sure, you watched him tell her he was busy but she kept pushing and you assumed he would just go with it instead. You were also being a little rude and she was his friend right, why else would they have looked so close last semester? You assumed he would’ve been annoyed by the way you responded to her and would want to end this study session before it could even start.
“I don’t know,” you said, sounding a bit more harsh than you expected, “Do you want to?”
Soobin looked genuinely caught off guard that you would even think that. Why would he not want to? He’s been thinking about this for weeks, he’s worked for this — or well stopped putting in the work so you could tutor him. Do you think he’s going to want to leave to hang out with Jia?
“Yes,” Soobin said looking all doe eyed and you’ve never seen him make that face to you. You looked to Jia, “So, can we finish studying or is there anything else you want to tell Soobin?”
She stared down at you with a glare but you didn’t budge, looking at her unimpressed and not intimidated at all. All you wanted to do was finish this study session, get paid, and go home. Why were they making this so complicated? Was it even worth all this trouble when you haven’t even gotten to reviewing his answers yet.
The more you thought about it the more you realized it was actually really annoying. Would you have to go through this every time you study in the library? Would some girl with a fat crush on Soomin come and try and take him away? Did you really want to put up with that?
Soobin practically jumped in his seat when you stood up, “It’s getting late and we haven’t even started, let’s just try this again some other time, I guess.”
“Y/n!” Soobin’s voice was a little too loud for the people in the library and a few felt perfectly fine telling him to shut up as he ran to the stairs completely forgetting Jin was standing there waiting on him.
The elevator came to a stop on the first floor and you swung your backpack onto your shoulders, head down as you caught up on your notifications. You barely made it past the elevator doors when you bumped into a very hard service. A strong arm grabbed you from the waist as you nearly stumbled back, your phone unfortunately did not have the luck of having someone grab it before it fell. Your hands clung to the shirt of the person and you finally got a good look at him, annoyed huff leaving your lips, “Soobin!?”
“What?” Play it cool, Soobin “I was coming to see where you went after ditching me up there.”
“I literally said we could do it some other day,” you released a sigh as you picked your phone up and shook his hands off your waist. Soobin loomed over your shoulder, “Damn, your screens cracked, when did that happen?”
He wasn’t thinking straight when he said that, all common sense completely left his body as he looked at your phone with pity, only snapping out of his thoughts when he felt you turn your head to look at him. It was then that he realized just how close the two of you were with him leaning down to look over your shoulder. He couldn’t help but attempt a smile noticing just how close your lips are to his and you smelled so goo—
“About two seconds ago, Soobin,” your voice was laced with sarcasm that had goosebumps raising on his skin at how annoyed you sounded, “When you bumped into me, remember?”
He blinked once in realization, feeling his cheeks heat up, “I did that?”
A tired sigh left your lips as you decided to ignore him. You weren’t sure if he was playing dumb to get on your nerves or if he actually was clueless but now you were more annoyed than before. You don’t have the money nor the time to get your screen fixed and you definitely can’t afford a new one.
“I’m going home,” you mumbled as you turned away from him, “Go find another tutor, probably Jia will help—“
“I don’t want to,” Soobin’s deep voice cut you off as he followed you out the door into the outside, “I want you to tutor me, Y/n. I’m sorry about your phone, I’ll fix it but don’t take back your word, you already agreed.”
You groaned, “Ugh, Soobin there’s so many girls who’ll tutor you and for free, you don’t need me and besides, we can’t study in the library if someone is going to interrupt.”
“Y/n it’s been one day,” Soobin said harshly, “Did Jia bother you that much?”
Soobin couldn’t help but feel hopeful and he wasn’t sure why. He knows you don’t like him so there’s no way you were jealous but to see you act just a little possessive over him made him blush. He liked it. He liked it a lot and he was determined to make you admit it any way you can. He watched you roll your eyes, expression laced with attitude, “I don’t care about Jia, Soobin, but if I’m trying to help your studies I’m not interested in others tagging along.”
He couldn’t help but bite his lip as he tilted his head to the side curiously, “So you want me to yourself?”
Once again you rolled your eyes, turning your back to him, “I’m leaving.”
“No,” Soobin grabbed at your wrist softly, “I’m kidding, come on, let’s figure something out, yeah?”
“Like?” You asked, still not sure why you’re willing to put yourself through this when you don’t even like him that much. You watched as his shoulder rose and dropped in a shrug, biting his lip in thought and you released a small sigh to let him know you were running out of patience. He looked down, “I don’t know, maybe we could go somewhere that it’s just us two.”
You could barely understand him from the way he mumbled but once you processed what he said, you just nodded, “Alright, I’ll go to your place tomorrow.”
“Really?” He asked, clearly thrilled at the idea but trying to play it off. You just nodded and he finally let you leave.
What were you getting yourself involved with him?
Soobin couldn’t sleep all night. He went to his classes looking like a complete zombie and for once he had an actual reason for not paying much attention. As much as he wanted to see you all day you made him wait till late because you had work after your last class. It only made him more anxious and he cleaned around his apartment twice, just to be sure you didn’t think he was messy even if he kind of was. The entire time this all happened, his friend watched him from the comfort of Soobin’s bed.
“So what makes you think Y/n would even want to hang out in your bedroom?” Taehyun asked as he watched his friend go crazy. Soobin was acting like he was preparing a date, he saw him put on Chanel perfume about three times, each time saying he couldn’t remember if he put any on. He even styled his hair on.y to mess it up and restyle it differently.
Soobin shrugged, “I don’t know, but my desk is here, Y/n might.”
Taehyun just nodded, not seeming fully convinced but went along with it anyway, “Wishful thinking, bin, wishful thinking, and just speak your truth, what’s the real reason why you want to be in your room instead out in the living room?”
He smirked watching the way Soobin’s face flushed red, “Privacy.”
He chuckled, “From who?”
Soobin didn’t answer him and it only made Taehyun smile in amusement, “I love you, but it’s never going to happen.”
“What are you talking about?” Soobin asked as he checked his phone, already smiling at the text you sent a few minutes ago that said you were already on your way.
soobin: ok just lmk
soobin: I’ll come down if u want
You didn’t respond but he didn’t expect you to, he only just sent the message but he still found himself waiting for those three dots to pop up on the message thread.
“I’m talking about how badly you want to hook up with Y/n,” Taehyun said, making Soobin look up at him completely shocked.
“I hate Y/n,” obviously he didn’t but he didn’t like the idea of his friends knowing he liked you without knowing how you felt and he had a reason for this. If they knew he liked you despite how mean you were to him, they would think he’s a masochist… it’s better they think he hates you too but apparently he wasn’t fooling anyone considering Kai caught on pretty quickly too.
Taehyun let out a laugh, one of those really loud and obnoxious laughs that told Soobin he was actually very amused by whatever was happening. He went as far as wiping away his cheek like a tear had fallen and said, “Good one, almost believed you there.
“I’m serious,” Soobin said as he looked at his reflection in the mirror, fixing a wrinkle in his shirt, “Y/n is mean to me, why would I like her?”
“I wanna know why too,” Taehyun said as he rolled onto his stomach only making himself more comfortable on the bed, “I mean, she’s hot, but she’s mean—wait a second, you like that she’s mean, huh?”
Taehyun was just teasing him at this point and when Soobin refused to respond, his eyes only widened, “Oh my god! You like that Y/n’s mean to you, are you a perv, Hyung?”
He was only teasing, he swears it. He doesn’t care what his friend is into, what he likes is totally up to him but it’s just fun to poke fun at him when he gets so flustered about it. He doesn’t blame Soobin for liking you, like he said, he can agree that you’re attractive, but you’ve blown Soobin off for three years. Did he really like you enough to keep up his charades and if so did he really go as far as failing his classes just to get you to talk to him? God, what will you do to Soobin once you find out?
“I’m not a perv!” Soobin yelled, a little louder than expected. He’s really not. He’s not a perv… he’s just… he just likes you. Yes, he likes that you’re a little mean to him, yes he likes when you scold him, yes he likes pushing your buttons and yes he especially liked it when you do it and he can see down your shirt or look at the squishiness of your thighs but… but he’s not a perv!
Okay, maybe he’s imagined what it’s like to feel under your shirt and has struggled to pay attention to anything but the sight of you in a short skirt but that doesn’t make him a perv, he’s just an easily distracted guy…
Before Taehyun could rebut, a loud knock was heard on the front door that had both of their eyes widening in surprise. Soobin was practically sprinting toward the door as his friend gathered his things to leave. He meant to leave before you were here but clearly time passed by way too fast and now he’s getting ready to leave just as Soobin was opening the door to you.
You looked at Taehyun curiously as he ran past you and out the door, yelling, “Hi Y/n! Bye Y/n!”
Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you let yourself into Soobin’s apartment, “What’s up with him? Why’d he leave in a hurry?”
“Uh,” Soobin gave you a blank expression that sort of reminded you of a confused bunny and you watched him scratch the back of his head in thought, “You said no distractions and… and he would be a distraction, right?”
“I guess,” you took the chance to look around his apartment, it was huge, way bigger than your apartment and it was so painfully obvious that he came from money. He had a grand piano in the corner for fuck’s sake. There was even a chandelier hanging above the dining table and a fireplace by the tv. Too distracted to notice Soobin move behind you, you nearly hit him in self defense when he began to pull on your backpack to take it off your shoulders. Without bothering with a thank you, you headed toward his marble dining table waiting for him to follow but he just stood in place.
“We’re studying in my room,” Soobin said in voice that radiated confidence, completely opposite of the desperate tone he used to prove to Taehyun that he was not a perv. He had an act to play, he assumed you liked mean guys. He’s heard of some of the guys you used to talk to and they all had one thing in common… they were intimidating and Soobin didn’t feel like that at all so he had to play the part.
You didn’t even question it as you followed him into his room, eyes immediately zoning in on the white cage set on its own stand, two different levels to it and a small hedgehog inside. Soobin cleared his throat awkwardly, “That’s Odi, he’s a hood boy.”
Fuck, Soobin thought, why would he say that about a damn hedgehog?
“Cute,”you said coolly as you took the main desk chair, making him have to pull up a smaller chair next to you. You thought Odi was cute after he called him a good boy? Or did him calling Odi a good boy not affect your thoughts on the hedgehog? Oh god, his mind was completely scrambled.
Soobin didn’t have to be asked this time to show you his most recent exam. He knew it was what you were going to ask to see first and he wanted to show you that he could be a very good listener. He looked to you to see how you would react to his quick obedience but you barely even blinked as you pulled it toward you. You pursed your lips in thought and he watched your mouth closely. Your lips looked so soft, so plump and smooth with light lip balm on them.
He wondered how soft they would be in a kiss. Were you a good kisser? Would you think he’s a good kisser? How far would the two of you go or would it just be kissing? He would someday like to get to a point where he can openly adore you because there’s just so much from your pretty hair to your pretty legs and everything in between.
He had a dirty secret that’s not so much of a secret considering his thoughts from earlier but… he can’t help but always notice your breasts—after your cute annoyed face of course—he wasn’t a complete bimbo. He respects you, he can’t just immediately look at your boobs despite the fact that today you were a low cut fitted shirt. He tried paying more attention to your face as it looked like you were about to talk but his eyes couldn’t help but slowly trail down your neck to your collarbone until he saw just the smallest hint of cleavag—
“Are you listening?” He snapped his gaze back to yours looking completely red handed as he nodded his head, clearly not listening.
You released a sigh as you looked at him in thought. Soobin was smart, you knew how smart he was so why did he seem so clueless right now?it’s like he had no thoughts in that cute head of his an—did you just consider him cute?
You blinked in surprise at your own thoughts and just as you were going to ask him to repeat what you said, you saw in real time the way his gaze seem to drop once more and you finally understood what was going on.
Soobin was trying so hard not to stare and failing yet the attempt was cute, especially when he seemed to let his lower jaw go slack and lips part slightly at the sight. Normally you would immediately be disgusted but it’s Soobin… he’s annoying and a know-it-all but just look at that brain empty expression of his, not caring at all now if he gets caught.
Without thinking you dropped a hand to his thigh, squeezing slightly and making his gaze return to yours, “What did I say?”
“What?” Soobin asked, shaking his head like he was snapping out of a trance, the cold and deep voice was back. You rolled your eyes, “You said you were listening so I’m asking you to repeat what I said.”
You’ll admit this was all a bit out of character but you just had to see if you were right… was Soobin really staring at your cleavage openly, and if so, how did you feel about it?
“Um…” Soobin looked down at your hand, “Um…”
“Um?” You repeated sarcastically, “Can you focus? If not, I’m going home.”
“Yah!” Soobin whined with a low groan, “Stop saying that, you already agreed to tutor me, stop trying to back ou—“
“Then pay attention!” You said back and he practically stomped his foot in a tantrum, just wanting to argue now.
“I’m trying but you—you’re,” he groaned in frustration as the words died in his throat and with a defeated sigh, he mumbled, “I’m sorry… I wasn’t listening.”
You smiled proudly, not at all in a rush to figure out what had him so distracted, and instead said, “Good boy, don’t you feel better being honest?”
The words just slipped and you didn’t think much of them as you went back to the laptop, already writing down answers to the questions he got wrong, meanwhile Soobin is trying to calm the painful red blush in his cheeks.
There was a small sphere in the palm of your hand, it was a shade of dark blue with a white swirl on it and it matched the same one Yeonjun held in his hand. You’ve shared one class with him in the last two years and it’s in the one you’re currently in. The two of you have never spoken a single word to each other and the semester started six weeks ago. He looked just as surprised to realize his partner was chosen randomly by a stupid marble.
He released a small nervous chuckle, clearly just caught off guard by this. He’s almost a 100% certain you’re like the only person in class that he hasn’t spoken to. Now, that didn’t mean he didn’t notice you, you were pretty and never talking to you really did make you seem a bit mysterious to him. He cleared his throat, “Alright, when should we get started?”
You checked the time on your phone, you were supposed to be meeting Soobin soon to study at his place but you’ve just been completely blindsided by this sudden partner project in class. You only had about a week to turn in the research paper and you had to work a couple nights this week. You agreed to study with Soobin on days you didn’t work but now with this on the table, you seriously don't know what to do. Well, obviously you have to do the assignment but you don’t know how to tell Soobin. If you just sent him a text about it you’re pretty positive he will just blow up your phone nonstop because for some reason he desperately needs you to continue these study sessions.
“When are you free?” You asked him trying to figure out what time would work best for you to work on this. You were only getting tomorrow to do research in class and after that the two of you are basically on your own as the unit confíes on in class.
Class has just ended so the two of you walked together outside of the room trying to figure out when would work best. It was hard to ignore the looks you received from some of your other classmates and you knew why. Yeonjun was attractive, really attractive and he was popular too.
Yeonjun brought his phone out too, checking his schedule, leaning a little closer to talk to you, “Um, I could do… well I work tomorrow after class… are you free later to get started?”
Soobin had a smile on his face that he knew soon he would need to drop it, he couldn’t let you know how excited he was to see you right now. He was in a good mood, anytime someone said hi to him he was quick to say it back but if a girl tried stopping him to talk he would excuse himself saying he had to go somewhere.
His class ended a little earlier today so instead of waiting in the parking lot for you, he went to your last class.
Just as he turned the corner, his smile seemed to fall without his control anyway. Standing just a few feet away from him he found you and you looked so pretty today in a pair of jeans that hugged your curves just the way he liked it and… and you were standing with Choi Yeonjun.
He watched you smile at whatever Yeonjun said and he debated if he should just wait. He could wait, of course he can and honestly it’s what he should do. You’re just talking to another guy and it’s not like you’re flirting, right? It shouldn’t even matter to him, you’re not dating—you don’t even like him! So why does he feel bothered?
“Hey,” Soobin’s deep voice surprised you as he came up behind you, so close that you felt him press against your backpack, just looming over you with a hardened gaze. You looked back at him, “Hey.”
“Are you ready?” He asked, trying to keep his voice steady and he couldn’t help but shift his gaze toward Yeonjun, who he definitely wasn’t happy to see was just standing there.
You looked at him apologetically, “I don’t know if I can make it tonight. We just got assigned this project and we don’t have time to do it in class so…”
Your words slowly died down as you watched his facial expression change. His lips turned downward and eyes seemed to sadden, “What?”
You looked at Yeonjun, “I’ll see you in the library.”
He took the hint and left you alone with Soobin who loomed over you with his height looking like a kicked puppy. You’re not sure why this expression really bothered you and you’re feeling really guilty now even if it wasn’t completely your fault. You found yourself saying, “I’m sorry.”
“But we agreed to meet up today,” Soobin said.
“I’m sorry but we want to get at least the outline finish—“
“Then what about after?” He rushed to ask. You looked at him apologetically, “It depends on what time we get done.”
You’re not even sure why the look on his face was making you feel bad but it was. The two of you didn’t even start to get along till just a couple weeks ago and sometimes he’s just so different from the cold side you’re used to. Sometimes he gives you snippets of how desperate he might be to see you but you can’t help but always brush it off. You just can’t tell what’s the real side of him and you’re starting to be affected by his cuter clingier side even if you couldn’t understand it.
“I’ll be waiting,” Soobin said, rushing away because he didn’t know what else to do. He was leaving before you could say that you can’t keep any promises. You rolled your eyes at how pushy he was but part of you smiled, shaking your head in disbelief and clearly amused.
Soobin didn’t lie either. He waited at home playing video games and checking his phone every couple minutes. He would occasionally send you a text, just a little reminder that you can’t forget him.
soobin: what time do u think u’ll be done ☺️
you: I don’t know yet soobin
soobin: :(
*five minutes later*
soobin: almost done?
you: not yet
soobin: 🥺 well hurry
you: …
soobin: 😞
*twenty minutes later*
soobin: 😞
you: what’s wrong
soobin: nothing :)
soobin: did you forget?
you: ?
soobin: study time?
you: no, I didn’t forget
Listen, the texts were annoying. They were so annoying because you and Yeonjun were trying to finish up the rough draft for your outline but Soobin just kept sending you text after text. It was annoying but…
It was pretty fucking cute. Ugh, he was just being clingy and though you found it annoying it was also so cute and it had you hurrying up your time with Yeonjun so you could text Soobin.
you: just finished
soobin: ok 🥰hurry
That’s how you found yourself sitting across from Soobin in his overly large living room trying to talk to him but his eyes were just straying away from your eyes. It wasn’t his fault though, like he said earlier, you just looked so pretty. Your shirt was fitted today and like usual he can’t seem to get over your chest. All of you really, your pretty face, pretty voice, pretty laugh and smile… your boobs and your butt and your cold attitude, it all just turned him into mush.
“Hey,” your voice scared him out of his gaze and he looked up at you blankly and clearly caught off guard, “Can you look at me when I’m talking to you?”
“Okay,” he nodded his head obediently, “Sorry.”
“You don’t even have your backpack,” you said as he looked down at his lap, “You were blowing up my phone the entire time I was with Yeonjun and you’re not even ready to study.”
“I know,” he gulped, eyes unable to help themselves from slowly looking down to your cleavage again. “I’m sorry.”
You released an annoyed groan, grabbing his shirt suddenly and shaking him, “Are you?”
“Yes,” Soobin nodded, “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again Y/n, I’ll be good, I promise.”
“So next time I’m doing schoolwork with Yeonjun what are you going to do?” You asked.
He released a sudden huff that made it clear he was less than happy to say this but said it anyway, “I’ll wait patiently for you to finish.”
Nodding your head you turned toward the small coffee table where your laptop was, “Kay, go get your bag so we can start reviewing this.”
Soobin jumped to his feet, running away with a smile, “So you’re not mad at me?”
“No,” you said feeling him practically squeal next to you, making you only the more confused but couldn’t help yourself from saying, “It was annoying in a cute way.”
Soobin bit back the urge to smile and did as told. When he came out he had a white bag in hand that he handed you watching your eyebrows scrunch together cutely as you asked, “What’s this?”
“New phone,” Soobin said casually and your eyes widened in disbelief.
“Soobin, why would you get me—“
“Because I broke yours,” Soobin said helping you open the box, “I already called your service and asked if you would be able to add your line to it and they said yes. I can drive you if you want me to.”
You shook your head no, “This is crazy, you didn’t have to do that! I could still use my phone, it was just the screen.”
“But,” Soobin looked down, “But it’s a gift from me to you, can’t you just take it?”
“Soobin…”
“Soobin is so cute,” your friend Yuna said one night as you got to Beomgyu’s house for a party.
You’ve been filling your friends in on your past two weeks with Soobin and it was all a surprise to them. You seemed to despise Soobin for some time and suddenly you’re all about hanging out with him. Even Soobin seemed to always act cold around you so for you to tell them that he’s been surprisingly clingy is in fact very cute.
“He probably likes you,” Beomgyu said with a shrug of his shoulders that had you spitting out your drink in shock. It’s not like you hadn’t wondered the same thing but for a while you wondered if you had just been reading too much into it and then you felt stupid for even thinking about it. Beomgyu bringing it up so suddenly shocked you, maybe it wasn’t all in your head.
“You think?” You asked genuinely and Beomgyu laughed out loud.
“Are you kidding?” Beomgyu asked, “He’s been staring at you since he got here and I bet you he’s been trying to think up an excuse to talk to you.”
“I’ve known him for like three years now, there’s just no way, I’m not even nice to him,” you said as you looked around for Soobin only to find him already looking at you as he talked a
To some of his own friends. He gave you a big and energetic wave that had you lifting your hand to wave back too. You smiled a little when he did and Yuna sighed, “You like him too, huh? I mean he’s cute—“
“No! No, I don’t,” you cleared your throat awkwardly, “I mean… even if I did, would it even matter? He thinks I’m mean, right? It wouldn’t be fair to him.”
They both gave you a blank stare and just as you were going to respond, an arm came around your shoulders as a low voice said, “What are we talking about?”
You said a quick hello to him as your friends started talking, “Soobin and Y/n got a thing for each other and neither one of them will admit it.”
“That’s not tru—“
“Oh, yeah, it is,” Yeonjun said with a laugh, “You should’ve seen the look he gave me when we were talking the other day and yesterday he ignored me when I tried saying hi. I even told him he can have you back because our project was over and he just ignored me!”
Your brows furrowed in confusion, “That doesn’t mean he likes me, we’ve just been studying…”
Soobin was not a mean person, he swears it. He’s really nice and gentle and he would never dislike anyone without a reason. He’s too shy for confrontation yet right now he would really love to go up to you and just pull Yeonjun’s arm away from your shoulders. You’re done with your project so why is he s next to you and why is he touching you? Soobin hasn’t even had the chance to hold you so why does he get to? He watched closely as you talked to your friends and Beomgyu trying to make sure Yeonjun wouldn’t try anything. He let Yeonjun take your attention away from him pretty much all last week so why is he still around you? It wasn’t fair, Soobin should be the one next to you. He was such a good listener this week, after you got him in trouble and he promised to be good, he did just that. He only sent you two texts throughout your time with Yeonjun and he didn’t even bother you in class!
“Who are you staring at and are they hot?”
Soobin jumped in surprise, drink spilling down the front of his shirt as he whipped around to find Kai standing there laughing.
“What?” Soobin asked as he looked down at his wet shirt. Kai just sighed, “Nevermind, go clean your shirt.”
If Soobin was mean, he would’ve smacked the kid upside the head but he was nice and nice people only attack with pillows and there’s no pillows close enough to use. He’ll get Kai back soon, just not now, now he has to clean his shirt. He looked back to you and Yeonjun as if making sure there wasn’t any funny business and practically ran to go clean himself off.
He skipped past the line to the bathroom and walked down to the end of the hall where he knew Beomgyu’s room was. His friend was throwing the party anyway and though the room was off limits, he would understand. Soobin rummaged through his closet and went straight to his bathroom so he could at least wipe off some of the intense smell of alcohol, hurrying himself along so he can watch Yeonjun.
The music from the party was loud enough for him to hear a muffled version of it even hidden away in Beongyu’s bathroom and that made him feel nervous. While he’s in here cleaning off the stench of liquor, you were probably out there surrounded by guys hitting on yo—“Ow!”
Soobin’s head whipped back with a loud thud and his hands immediately flew to his nose as pain shot right through it. The person who pushed the door open stood there in shock, “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. Bin?”
A pool of red began to fill his cupped hands and he moved over the bathroom sink with a groan. You visibly cringed as he moved around you and reached for the toilet paper as you stood there shocked, “I’m so sorry, I didn’t know, I—oh my god.”
He finally looked over at you, heart racing as he pulled the paper towel away, blood beginning to dribble again, “Y/n?”
“Soobin, I’m sorry, I saw you come over here and I wanted to sneak up on you but,” your face cringed, “Soobin please, you’re still bleeding.”
“Oh right,” Soobin held the paper towel to his nose again.
“It’s a lot of blood,” you said apologetically, “I’m sorry, Soobin.”
“It’s fine, this happens all the time,” he waved you off with a bloody hand and you bit down on your bottom lip looking hurt, “No it doesn’t, I’m so sorry.”
You sniffled a bit as you looked at your reflection in the mirror while Soobin carefully wiped off whatever mess was left until it was all clean. You struggled to look at him and his red nose even if he was completely clean but he didn’t even notice. He was more excited that you came to see him instead of staying out there with other guys, “So you wanted to sneak up on me?”
“Well you had been staring at me all night and I was just gonna see if you would say hello. I should’ve just waited outside, this is awkward right?” You were rambling a bit but he just smiled lovingly.
He shook his head no as the two of you left the bathroom, “No, not awkward, right? I wanted to say hi but you were busy.”
“Busy?” Your brows furrowed in confusion, “What do you mean?”
You weren’t busy, you were just talking to your friends. Nothing you talked about was serious or anything you just talked about Soobin, he could’ve said hi at any time. Soobin’s smile dropped, going serious for a moment, “Yes you were, with Yeonjun, I saw.”
You blinked in thought, “We were just talking, you could’ve come over any time.”
He released a deep sigh, looking around the dark bedroom happy that it was just two despite the dozens of people out there getting drunk with loud music. Letting his gaze fall back on you, he made a small pout, “Well, how was I supposed to know that? Last time you got me in trouble for not leaving you alone when you’re with Yeonjun an—“
“Soobin, that was just when we were studying, I didn’t realize you were thinking I meant all the time,” you said apologetically. Soobin stepped closer to you, “I was just trying to be good and listen. If I knew then I would have pulled you away the second I saw Yeonjun even come close to you!”
You looked genuinely taken back by his tone, if you didn’t know any better you would say that he almost sounded jealous. Even the look in his eye made it seem like he wasn’t happy and you weren’t used to this at all. The other day when you talked to Yeonjun for the first time, Soobin stormed up to you and took you by surprise when he appeared behind you, so close that you felt his breath on your shoulder.
Now you’re starting to see that it was possibly all because of jealousy.
“Are you jealous of Yeonjun?” You asked him and he audibly scoffed.
He was not jealous of Yeonjun. He didn’t think Yeonjun was better than him, if anything he thought they were pretty much on the same level of attractiveness. Yeonjun was more extroverted than he was but Soobin wasn’t worried about that. He didn’t feel so insecure over things like that so no, he’s not jealous.
He’s possessive. Soobin knows you aren’t dating and he knows that you probably still don’t like him yet but… but you’re his. He’s already called dibs, he’s already put in so much work to make that happen. Obviously he’s not going to be happy if your attention strays away from him, he wants you looking at him and thinking about him all the time, the way he does about you.
“No,” Soobin finally said, “But… but you’re… yknow, you’re mi—“
“Why are you in my shirt?” Beomgyu asked as his bedroom door opened and he stood in the entrance. He looked between you in surprise, “Wait, am I interrupting something?”
You stood there in shock, you weren’t sure what he was about to say but part of you also felt like you had an idea. It really did seem like you had an idea. After all your friends have basically instilled it in your head that he might like you it wasn’t hard to guess what he was going to say but you just can’t bring yourself to fully believe it yet. He was so nice, you can see it now so you just felt bad to think that he might like you after you were mean to him at times. To make things worse, he seemed to be totally okay with you always snapping on him or just ignoring him and you just felt bad because you were genuinely starting to fall for him and you can admit that now.
Soobin shook his head no. He had been watching you the entire time and he can just tell you’re overwhelmed by something right now. He just smiled cutely, “I had to borrow your shirt because mine got wet, sorry?”
You looked up at him, and he smiled wider, eyes crinkling, “I think I’m gonna head home now but I’ll text you.”
Soobin said goodbye to you and Beomgyu and before you could make your leave, Beomgyu pulled you back in, “What happened? What were you guys doing? Were you making out? Ew, oh my god please don’t tell me if you did anything on my bed.”
“What are you talking about?” You asked, clearly thrown off, “No, we were just talking, if you hadn’t interrupted then I would have known what he was going to say.”
He gasped, “I didn’t interrupt, you’re in my room, remember? And why didn’t you just go with him, you like him too.”
You bit your lip, “How do I tell him? I just missed my chance.”
“I don’t know, you’ll probably just have to show him.”
When Monday came you went over to Soobin’s place for your usual study lessons. After the party the two of you have been texting but it wasn't about anything deep. It’s like you were tip toeing around a possible confession that neither of you wanted to do through text. After your last class he invited you over with the intention to just be straight forward and hope that you would want him but he’s still a little scared.
If you tell him you hate him he thinks he might cry so he’s been trying to seem cool and collected this entire time.
He fidgeted in his desk chair as he watched you take your laptop out. With a clear of his throat he stood up, “Um, do you want water? I can get us some.”
“Sure, where is your textbook? I forgot mine.”
He pointed to his backpack and let you get it as he left for the kitchen. Without a single thought, you reached for his huge backpack in search of a familiar textbook. Once you found the book you pulled it out of his overly stuffed bag accidentally bringing a few papers with it too and as you looked them over, your eyes widened.
CHOI SOOBIN
SCORE: 65
You didn’t think about it for a second, he’s been showing his assignment scores and it has been improving little by little bit as you took a closer look you could clearly see a layer of whiteout and the score 98, crossed off. It made your brows furrow in confusion and you looked at the pages finding answers erased and replaced with wrong ones crossed out in red.
It’s like he was purposely grading himself bad and as you put the papers back away you realized why. He asked you to tutor him and you never understood that. He was always smarter than you so you couldn’t wrap your head around why he asked you of all people to help him. Even when it came down to the actual study sessions, Soobin always got things right away and very rarely struggled to find an answer but then he would come to you and quickly show you his bad score and ask for your help again.
Sometimes, studying was the last thing on his agenda when he was with you and you always found him distracted and not fully listening so now you know he’s been lying to you. He lied to get you to study with him yet all you’ve seen was him stare at your boobs, get clingy, and pretend to get bad grades.
Was all this just a little scheme to get you to hang out with him? If that’s the case then did he really like you and expect you never to find out?
Sure, you’ve come to realize that you like him too but for him to go this far just for you to talk to him… well, you’re not all that happy about it. Did he expect you never to find out and now that you have what was your plan?
Soobin came in with a smile on his face, “I brought snacks.”
“Mhm,” you said, moving to sit on his bed and away from his backpack, “Let’s work on the bed today, I wanna get comfortable.”
He watched you make yourself on his bed and all he could focus on was the way your skirt fluttered around your legs exposing more of your thighs and when he looked up at you, your eyes were already on him, catching him red handed in the act of checking you out. This time around you smirked a bit now knowing that he’s been lying this whole time just to get you to hang out with him. It was cute and he was cute so you can’t be mad but at the same time, he was very bold in getting mad when you had to study with Yeonjun, made you feel guilty too. You gotta let him know you know about his lie but you’re working up a plan.
It’s not no surprise that he likes you, that has become painfully obvious and you like him too but you want to get him in trouble. He lied and he thought you would never find out. How long did he plan on keeping this up? He’s gotta get in trouble, right? Maybe a little teasing, just to see if this really was all just to study or for him to get a good look at you when you’re alone together. It’s not like you never noticed the way his eyes would trace down your body while you’re trying to do homework.
If you’re going to tell him you know about his lie, you’re going to make it fun.
“O—okay,” Soobin stuttered as he sat down with a foot of space between you, “I mean, yeah cool.”
You smiled at his awkwardness, now you can see that he’s not as cold as he wants to to think he is and it only makes him look cuter.
The two of you studied for a bit, you couldn’t come right out and tell him you knew the truth, where was the fun in that? You had to play along a bit and see how he would take it so that’s what you did.
“Soobin, you keep getting the answer wrong and I’m starting to get annoyed,” you said as you watched him hesitate over the right answer before choosing the wrong one, eyes sliding over to look at you every now and then. You were wearing a low cut top again and matched with your miniskirt it was getting hard for him to not get distracted and the two of you are alone in his bed… he just can’t focus.
“Sorry, Y/n,” his eyes lingered on your thighs a little longer than usual and you subconsciously unwrapped them a little, the small gap from where the skirt ended and what covered your underwear, slowly widened. You released a heavy sigh, “Why are you so distracted?”
At that his eyes seemed to fall toward your cleavage, catching himself in the act of staring and looked back down, “I don’t know.”
You had to bite back a smirk and without any hesitation, you moved closer to his side, “Do I need to punish you? Will that get you to pay attention?”
You were half joking but tempted to see what he would say and you could practically see the wheels turning in his head as he seemed to become mush at your words, “H-how?”
You released a deep sigh, “How? That’s the wrong answer, I shouldn’t have to punish you. You should say, ‘Okay, Y/n, I’ll pay attention.’ What are you? A perv?”
Soobin went quiet at that and for a second you thought you might’ve said the wrong thing. His face flushed red and he looked down at his lap sadly but before you could apologize for asking him that, he said, “Maybe.”
“Maybe? So you’re a perv?” Your brows raised in surprise, “You want me to punish you?”
He gave a subtle nod of his head making you grow quiet, well this just got interesting. With a huff, pretending to be annoyed, you shifted even closer taking his hand in yours and pulling it to write on his paper with yours over his, “Start writing.”
“What am I writing?”
“Write: I am a liar and a perv,” you said jokingly and he looked up at you cutely so you helped him write, “I lied to Y/n about needing help, and I can’t stop staring at her boobs.”
His hand froze up mid sentence, “Y/n, how’d you find out?”
You smiled, he didn’t even bother hiding it this time, “Because I found your exam scores, you’ve been lying to me Soobin, after telling me nonstop how good you are,” you said with a stern voice.
“Are you mad?” He asked shyly. You released a sigh, pretending to contemplate, “Maybe? Are you going to listen and pay attention from now on?”
He nodded his head, watching curiously as you moved to sit behind him, turning to stare at you but you snapped your fingers forcing him to look forward again. You scooted close until your legs were spread around his big frame with your breasts pressed against his back that had his breath hitching in surprise. They already felt squishy and your arms moved to hug his waist. Soobin sucked in a breath when your hands rested on his thighs and he immediately looked down, already feeling himself begin to fidget in excitement and nervousness.
“I want you to read the question, and tell me the answer, I know you know it,” you said, making him nod his head, throat too dry to give you a verbal response, “But since you’re a perv, I’m not going to make it easy for you, I’m gonna touch you and if you stop, I stop, got it?”
As if to further explain what you meant, your hand moved toward his groin area making him breath heavier, “Mhm.”
“Yes or no.”
“Yes,” he sighed, “I’ll listen.”
His head tilted to the side when you began to teasingly touch the zipper, slowly pulling it down and undoing the button of his jeans, “Start reading.”
Soobin swallowed dryly, unable to help himself from thinking about the fact that you’re brakes today, he could practically feel your nipples against his back and when your hand ran over the expanse of his growing length, he couldn’t find the right word. You were a little surprised to feel his immediate response to your touch, already feeling him harden before you even did anything and you smiled, “I said, start reading.”
“Mhm,” he hummed with a nod of his head, blinking to try and collect his thoughts, “First question, When a gene is expressed, it means that the protein—ohh.”
His breath hitched in surprise as your hand wrapped around his clothed cock feeling him just continue to get more erecting. You even gave it a little squeeze, “Did I say stop? No, so keep going.”
“Mhm, protein that it codes for is being made by transcription and translation…” his word slowly when your thumb circled around his tip, still not touching him under his briefs, teasing him, “Imagine two genes in a eukaryote. One is gene X. The other is gene A—Y/n, I can’t focus.”
“So did you lie to me again?” You asked, finally sneaking your hand under the waistband or his briefs, “You said you would listen and pay attention.”
Your fingers wrapped around his thick length giving him a soft and teasing stroke, feeling his dick twitch instantly as he nodded his head. The words were bef ninny to get blurry when your palm hugged the head of his cock, twisting your wrist and smearing it in his own precum, surprised that it was already leaking. Soobin licked his dry lips trying to focus again, “In the cells you are studying, gene X is being expressed, and gene A is not being expressed—oh my god.”
He stopped when he felt you lean further against him, soft lips pressing a gentle kiss against his neck, fingers brushing along the underside of his tip and he couldn’t help but buck his hips just a little. You pulled his cock out of his underwear, “You still haven’t even finished reading the first question.”
“I’m trying,” he released a moan, “But it’s so hard, Y/n.”
You glanced down at his dick over his shoulder, nearly joking and asking if he meant his dick or the action. The head was red with need and precum leaked from the tip with a thick vein nearly throbbing everytime your hand stroked him. You gave him a small squeeze hearing him moan freely, “Keep going.”
With an annoyed groan he nodded, still waiting a moment when you began to pump his length using his own excess precum to lubricate him for an easier slide. He attempted to pick up where he left off, “—and gene A is not being expressed—ngh. Which prediction below is most likely true in these cells?”
You kissed his neck again, “Now what’s the answer?”
He released a throaty moan that made you suck harshly against his neck with the vibrations of it, stroking faster, squeezing at his base and flicking your wrist around his tip, unable to ignore the way he raised his hips to fuck into your fist. You put your legs on to of his lap to keep him from bucking, holding him in place, “I’m waiting.”
His head lolled to the side, hissing in pain when you stopped, tightening your fist and looked at him expectantly. He had to use his stupid brain, “Ugh, i—it’s B. There are more activa—oh my god—activators for gene X than for gene A.”
Your tongue licked a long stripe toward his ear, sucking on his ear lobe as you said, “Good boy, Soobin, next one.”
“Mhm,” he whined, feeling his heart leap at the name, “Good boy,” he repeated to himself. Unable to help himself he turned his head to look at you, big sparkly eyes staring into yours and without much thought, you leaned forward, letting your tongue slide into his mouth, never once stopping the jerking of his cock until finally… you felt it.
It was a complete overflow of warmth, thick and creamy cum that wouldn’t stop leaking from his tip as he threw his head back with a loud moan, hips lifting up even with your legs holding him down. It felt never ending, your fist was completely covered in his cum and it drenched his jeans and boxers, you were genuinely surprised. You didn’t know someone could cum this much from a simple handjob.
Soobin released a dry groan as you finally freed yourself from the absolute puddle of cum, looking down at the white cream that coated your fingers, letting him go and watching him fall limp against you. His chest rose and fell with each heavy breath and he looked absolutely fucked out that you allowed him to lie down as you pushed the textbooks off the bed, wiping your hand against his own jeans, tugging them off, “Soobin.”
“Mm,” he hummed, looking completely zoned out but let you undress him. You clicked your tongue, climbing on top of his spent cock watching it twitch with life as you sat down, “Did I tell you to cum, bunny?”
His lip quivered as he looked at you, wordlessly shaking his head no. You released a deep sigh, “So you weren’t listening? Is that good or bad?”
“Bad,” he said sadly, “B—but I couldn’t Y/n, I—“
“You what?” You asked teaching for the end of your shirt, “You just thought to cum soon, like a dumb virgin?”
He stayed quiet, watching and feeling completely hypnotized by the sight of your bare breasts for his eyes only, finally. They were just how he imagined, big and soft with nipples he could see harden under his intense gaze. He was so lost in the sight that he absentmindedly said, “Yes.”
You seemed to stop as you flung your shirt to the floor, only wearing your small miniskirt, “Yes what?”
“Dumb virgin—“
“What?” You asked suddenly watching his face redden and you felt goosebumps raise on your skin, “Are you saying… are you a virgin?”
He nodded blankly, eyes on your boobs and nothing else, his cock coming back to life, “Mhm.”
“Oh my god,” you nearly jumped off his lap but his hands moved so fast to hold you by the waist and stop you. Your eyes widened, “Soobin, I—are you—oh my god, is this your first time getting a handjob?”
He blushed, nodding his head shyly, hands unable to stop themselves from sliding up your sides until they were just under the curves of your tits, thumbs nearly touching, “Yes and my first kiss, bu—“
“I am so sorry,” you tried to move but his hands were suddenly cupping your breasts, a blank expression on his face as he stared at them in awe, catching a feel while you tried apologizing, “Soobin, we shouldn’t. I—I—“
“I want to,” Soobin groaned, thumbs running over your nipples, “Please Y/n, I want you so fucking bad. I think about you all the time, I think about this all the time.”
You couldn’t help but grind against his naked cock at his words, “You do?”
His big hands felt good as they groped you, “All the time.”
It didn’t take you long to realize what he meant, a small smile on your face, “When you touch yourself?”
He nodded, releasing a quiet whisper as your nipples became hard pebbles that he couldn’t help but pinch, you smiled, grinding on his fat spent cock, “When you watch porn?”
Once again he nodded.
“When else?”
“Whenever you leave here,” he confessed, completely hypnotized by the bounce of your tits when you grind on his dick, “I tried using a flesh light but I’m too big, it always rips an—“
Now he was blabbing but it made you so fucking horny. He was big, too big to be a virgin and the territorial side of you was taking over. You’re the only one who’s made this big, stupid cock cum and holy shit, he came so much just from a handjob!
Feeling a bit more confident, he tilted his head cutely, looking up at you, “You’ve got big boobs, Y/n.”
“I kno—“
“Can I kiss em?”
Your eyes widened in surprise and a wicked smirk came to your face, shimmying up his torso, “No.”
His jaw dropped sadly, “Bu—“
“I got something better you can kiss,” you said seductively and he looked up at you with the cutest doe eyes you’ve ever seen. How could you ever dislike him? Just look at him.
“Really?” He looked down at the space between your legs, a thin thong right there between your folds and he could make out a wet spot. Licking his lips his big hands found your thighs, taking the honor to help you move up, “I’ve never, y’know…”
“I know, bunny,” you said even as he moved you closer and closer to your head with anticipation, “I’ll talk you through it bu—Soobin!”
A small squeal left your lips as he nearly knocked you forward, face between your legs, “Wait, I’m heavy, don’t do that unless you want me to suffocate you.”
Soobin wasn’t listening, his face was already against your pussy, nose brushing over the soaked fabric of your underwear, “Is okay, I want you to.”
He licks the wet spot on your underwear, lapping at the puddle with a moan, “Smells so good, Y/n, love it.”
You softly tugged his hair, leaning more and more of your weight onto his face and rocking, “Careful, okay? If it’s too much just tell me to stop.”
Soobin nodded his head against your clit, giving you a thumbs up before he completely yanked at your frail panties making you gasp as he tore into them. You yelled his name once more and he made a pout, “Sorry, they were in my way.”
“Slow down Binnie,” you reminded him, for a guy who’s never done it he seemed so experienced. Maybe it was all the porn he watched. You didn’t have much time to dwell on it as his tongue began lapping between your hole and your clit, sucking on it like it was a fucking lollipop, swirling his tongue around it hungrily. It’s not his fault. If you weren’t so pretty with such big boobies and a big brain and a cute laugh… he wouldn’t be so eager. He felt the moment your strength dissipated, hips no longer hovering and practically suffocated him, and he loved it.
He got sloppy, wanting to stick his tongue into your cunt as far as it could go, bunny eyes staring up as you rode his face now, losing yourself to the feeling, “Oh my god.”
Soobin began a repetitive motion with his tongue against your clit, before fucking you with it, he spread your ass with his big hands but his eyes were on the way your tit juggled with each breath you took and he imagined your clit was a nipple. His cock twitched at the thought, legs moving restless against the bed as he tried finding his own release but he jumped bucked his hips into the air.
You were so close, so so so close, moaning like a bitch in heat and accidentally tugging on his hair too hard, but he didn’t mind one bit. He liked it, it egged him on and he made out with your pussy so good that you couldn’t hold back, cum spilling into his open mouth with your thighs clenching around his head. A low moan fell from his lips and as you tried coming down from your heavy orgasm, his own cock released another stream of cum. You turned to look at it, a puddle of white coating his stomach, culling untouched.
Your jaw dropped as he let you go and before you could offer up a break, he was flipping you onto your back, head immediately going between your breasts.
“Fuck,” you breathed out as his mouth attached itself to your left tit like he wanted to swallow them whole. His mouth was covered in your cum and some drool. His cock lay perfectly between your folds and you just felt how hard he was, bringing your hands to his hair, coddling him, “You love my boobs, don’t you?”
At the feel of your hands in his hair, he groans, teeth gently nipping at the hard buds, “Mhm. Love ‘em.”
“I know, that’s why you always stare at them, naughty bunny,” you teased, feeling his shaky inhale. He kissed your tits and sucked on your nipples as his erecting cock jumped your folds, “Not naughty.”
“Really?” You asked, biting back a moan when he shook his head against your boob just soaking in the softness of them against your cheek, “Just being a perv then?”
“Mm,” Soobin moaned, “Wan’ fuck you, Y/n, baby.”
Your brows raised in surprise as the pet name fell from your lips already feeling his hand sink down toward his cock while tonguing at your sensitive nipple. You couldn’t help yourself at this point, stroking your fingers gently over his nipples, smiling as he shudders at the feel, cock slippery in his hands as you said, “Fuck me then.”
With a quick nod he lined himself up, missing your hole a few times till you offered him help and moaned. His body fell against yours, not sure what to do as the tightness of your pussy completely overwhelmed him, face between your tits, tongue trying to lick you even if he was so far away. He whined, “Y/n, Y-Y/n, help—“
His words died when you grabbed his hips, guiding them back before thrusting them into your own pussy until he got the rhythm. You didn’t even think twice about the fact that you weren’t using a condom. You were on birth control and though it wasn’t fully effective it was safer than not having anything and clearly it was too late. You didn’t expect the virgin to have condoms anyway.
“It’s okay, baby, nice and slow—fuck, Bin,” you moaned softly. Where did this new Soobin come from? He was fucking you now at a steady pace dragging his stupidly fat cock out till only his tip was in and drawing his hips forward till he impaled you. His mouth lazily kissed at your breasts before moving up your neck, humping his cock into your stretched out cunt with moans falling from his lips repeatedly.
Soobin was gasping for air and his grunts became louder and louder, slamming into you like his life depended on it, “So good.”
“Yeah?” You asked, clinging to him, “Love your first pussy?”
He kissed you nastily. Tongue down your throat and you could still taste your cum but it only made you moan. He was fucking you roughly, nails digging into your plump hips making sure you couldn’t escape his brutal thrusts even if you wanted to. It was his turn to lose control and fuck, he was so close.
It was a scene out of a porn video, it reeked of sex and his bed sheets were completely ruined. His stomach was covered in his cum that just soaked yours from the way he rutted himself against you and it was just nasty and horny. You hugged him close, legs wrapping around him, tits pressed against his chest, “I’m close, bunny, you gonna cum for me?”
“Mhm,” he whined fucking you so good you were seeing stars. His dick was just so big and the girth on it was insane, he impaled you over and over again, “Gonna cum.”
You know you should tell him to pull out. It’s the right thing to do but…
But…
Hot ropes of his creamy cum filled your cunt suddenly with a cry as his body shook against yours. Despite cumming twice already it felt never ending and you couldn’t help yourself. The stimulation was just too much, his cock still thrusting into the wet space between your thighs.
Soobin sniffled, face between your breasts, clinging to you so hard you had to practically pull at his hair, “Soobin, bunny, I know it was a lot but you have to move.”
He shook his head, you could hear his sniffles get louder, “Don’t wanna.”
You ran your fingers through his hair, pouting when you found his reddened eyes, “I need to clean up.”
He shook his head cutely but he knew better. He slowly pulled out, watching with starry eyes as globs of cum left your pussy, an urge to finger it back into you strong but he let you sit up in shock at the mess.
“Did you lie to me again?” You asked jokingly but it went right over his head even as you said, “You don’t fuck like a virgin.”
“No! I didn’t! You’re my first, I promise,” he basically followed you out of bed, “Don’t leave.”
“I’m not going to,” you assure him, “But I need to use the bathroom.”
“You’ll come back, right?”
You smiled, “I can’t just stay in there, can I? Lay down, I’ll help you clean up next.”
He nodded his head tiredly, doing just what you asked as he yawned.
Once you were done, hoping you got most of it out you opened the door to his bathroom, nearly screaming when you found him standing just on the other side of it. You gasped, “You scared me.”
“Sorry,” he sniffles and it looks like he’s been crying, “Sorry.”
“What for?” You asked, trying to lead him back to his bed feeling sad. What happened? You’re not used to Soobin like this. You laid him down and joined him, “What’s wrong?”
“Sorry for lying—I—I—I just like you so much and—and,” he struggled with words and you pulled him in for a hug, his head immediately on your chest.
“Don’t worry, it’s okay, I promise,” you said, “I like you too, why don’t you try and get some sleep? It was a lot for your first time, I’m sorry.”
“I liked it,” he said with a content sigh, “Promise you won’t leave?”
“I promise,” you said brushing his hair back but he wouldn’t budge.
“Pinky swear?” He asked hopeful that you smiled.
“I pinky swear,” you said, kissing the tip of his nose, “We’ve gotta talk anyway.”
He pouted once more, “About? Y-you don’t like me?”
“Binnie, I already told you I do,” you said softly, feeling him relax, “But we need to talk about what to do, right?”
“Mhm,” he hummed, finally relaxing against you, “Want you to be my girlfriend.”
“Aren’t I too mean, though?”
“Yes,” he said cutely, “But I like it.”
::.
ok this took me forever 😭😭sorry friends but I hope it was worth it.
taglist: @laylasbunbunny @bangchansbae
3K notes · View notes
luvyeni · 7 months ago
Text
❛GOOD SHOT❜ ( bokseungah )
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p. bestfriend!bokseungah x camgirl!reader w. 4.1k
warnings? threesome, oral ( m. receiving ), handjobs, unprotected sex, facial, nipple play, dirty talk, consensual filming
request: can you do a maknae line smut (skz) please🙏🏼??
authors note. i hope you like it, this is like 4000+ words of pure filth😭 — 𖦹 ( your best friends finding out you're a cam girl and you're not embarrassed ) !
MINORS DON'T INTERACT
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“o-oh fuck.” You moaned out, the thick silicone dildo stuffed inside your cunt. “fuck it’s so big, im gonna cum.” Your moans exaggerated, but the people through the screen didn’t know that, they still paid you. “fuck im cumming!” you gasped— then a song played from your phone; someone was calling.
Who could be calling you at this moment? You made sure to always turn your phone off when you filmed videos— you must’ve forgotten this time, and it could definitely be heard on your camera.
You were a cam girl in your free time to make your living; hiding your face so you won’t be recognized, even going as far as to changing your sheets; you weren’t embarrassed but you’d rather not be in public and have a random person recognizes you as the girl who does porn
Quickly finding the phone turning it off, throwing it somewhere choosing to deal with later, coming down from your high— your fans wouldn’t care, as long as they got off they were worried about the background noise. “fuck that felt good.” you giggled. “came so much.” Pulling the toy out of you, thighs covered in your essence, as you teased your clit with the tip of the toy.
After ending the video, it was time to edit it, using the blur function to blur out your face, hitting the upload video to your account. “shit where’s my phone, i need to post it to twitter.” you search around, now in some shorts and a tank top. “ah here it is.” you picked up your phone, seeing who called you— it was jeongin, one of your best friends, you’d call in him after uploading to twitter.
“okay done.” You said hitting the upload button to twitter. “okay to see what jeongin wanted.” you searched for his number, hitting the call button. “pick up you fox.”
Jeongin searched for his phone which was ringing, trying to pause the tv with the other. “what the hell are you doing?” seungmin said; felix looking up from the tv upon hearing your name— jeongin picked up his phone. “its yn.” He said, finally hitting pause. “she must be calling me back.” Seungmin watched the boy answer the phone with a huge smile. “jesus just say you want to fuck her and call it a day.”
“don’t say that— no not you yn, seungmin being seungmin.” He said, felix laughing. “tell yn i said hi.” He said, his phone buzzing. “you too, how about you both fuck her instead of jerking off to twitter porn.” Seungmin said, felix flagging him off, ignoring him, seeing the notification for twitter. “he’s just upset i paused the tv when you called.”
“ah so he’s being a hater as user, tell him I said tighten up.” You laughed, hearing seungmin fussing in the background. “so why’d you call me?” you asked. “oh, um do you want to watch a movie tomorrow?” he asked. “we haven’t seen you in a long time.” he said. “sure, let’s do it.” you said. “you guys can come here, my tv is bigger.” seungmin spoke up again. “not everyone can afford shit, we aren’t even sure how you’re paying for shit, you don’t even have a job.”
Believe you or not you and seungmin were also best friends, you were best friends with all of them; you met them during your first year of college, you and jeongin were dorm mates, and he introduced you to felix and seungmin— you eventually moved into your own apartment once you made enough money from caming, the boys moving into the their own shared apartment for second year of university.
“you guys can argue tomorrow, we’ll bring the food okay?” you heard felix say. “i have extra beers, you guys don’t have to bring those.” jeongin hummed. “okay , see you tomorrow.” he chirped. “okay, bye innie!” you hung up.
“be careful innie i can see your boner.” seungmin teased the boy. “jesus you’ve had three years and you still haven’t fucked her, even felix has gotten somewhere with her.” felix rolled his eyes. “we were drunk and it was truth or dare.” He defended. “don’t bring me into this.” He said. “and it's still further than innie here has.”
Felix ignored them arguing back and forth, still scrolling through his twitter, coming across his recently new favorite account; a cam girl he’d came across — a new video had been posted, the video automatically playing, moans playing from his phone. “are you seriously watching porn right now?” they turned to the boy.
“no of course not, it played by itself.” He tried to turn it off. “well turn it off.” Jeongin said. “im trying the phone is frozen.” He knew should’ve bought a new one. “jesus your phone is stupid.” seungmin got up talking the phone, about to turn the phone off when a song played from the video— he knows that song, that was your favorite song, he knew that because it was also your ringtone; and those sheets, you had those sheets, and the heart shaped birthmark that on your lower hip that he saw when he accidentally walked in on you getting dressed one day when you still lived with jeongin; those same sheets in your bed.
That was the first day he ever thought about fucking you, much like his other friends.
“jesus are you seriously watching it to” jeongin said. “at least do it in your room.” he scrunched his nose in disgust. “shut up.” seungmin said, trying to see if the girl in the video would speak, is she spoke it would confirm his suspicions— and then you did and it confirmed just as he thought as soon as he saw that birthmark. “that’s yn.”
“what?” jeongin got up, looking over the boys shoulder. “you can’t even see her face, how can you tell?” he said. “I’ve watched a ton of her videos, I would’ve recognized if it was yn.” Felix said. “I doubt you’re thinking about her voice when she’s naked, bouncing on dildo.” He said flatly. “this is her voice, she owns those sheet and she has that birthmark.”
Felix turned the phone off, trying to come to terms with the fact he’d been jerking off to his best friend for the past few months. “how did you remember all this?” jeongin asked seungmin. “when you both lived together; i accidentally walked in on her getting dressed, I saw that birthmark, and she had those sheets.”
“and you remember?” felix said. “and you know her voice, seems like jeongin isn’t the only one who likes her.” He smirked, seungmin rolled his eyes. “says the one who only got a boner after finding out it was his best friend he’d been jerking off too, seems like you’ve thought about that kiss longer than you’ve should have.”
“so all of us want to fuck our best friend.” Jeongin sat back. “we’re terrible people.” He said. “not really, I mean she’s hot , anyone with eyes and a working penis would have these thoughts.” Felix said. “and fuck you can’t tell me this video wasn’t hot.” He said. “boys and girls can be friends, but i know what i want.”
“i doubt she’d want to do anything, i mean we’ve been friends for three years and she hasn’t made a move.” Jeongin said. “please she flirts all the time, you’re just stupid.” Seungmin said. “as many times she’s given you fuck me eyes and it’s completely flew over your head.” He scoffed. “its almost pathetic.” Jeongin face turned red, the thought of fucking you had always been there, but seeing that video just fueled that fire tenfold.
“how do we even tell her?” felix thought with his brain for a minute and not his cock. “that we know what she does, and that we—” his voice trailed off, seungmin finished it. “all want to fuck her? Just tell her, come on it’s yn she’d had if we held this in anyway, when we see her tomorrow there’s gonna be obvious tension, and she’s gonna be pissed if she feel left out.” He shrugged. “and by the look of those videos i doubt she doesn’t want to.” He smirked. “i can bet on it.”
The next day you got ready for the movie, sitting out the beers on the table along with a bowl of fresh popcorn— dressed in a comfy pair of shorts and a top; waiting for your friends to arrive.
“leaving your door unlocked knowing anyone could come kill you it crazy.” seungmin walked through the door. “please if the 86 year old woman across the hall manages to not break a hip while trying to murder me then she deserves it.” Standing up, grabbing the snacks from his hands. “why are you two just standing there come in and sit.” You told the boys who stood behind seungmin timidly. “I don’t know why they’re acting like they haven’t been here before.”
“literally we do this all the time, sit make yourselves comfortable, i’ll get some glasses.” you made your way into the kitchen, leaving the boys alone. “stop acting like a bunch of timid virgins and be normal for once in your lives.” Seungmin said, sitting back as you came back with a few cups. “everything alright?” felix nodded smiling. “y-yeah were fine.” You tilted your head. “innie?”
He turned to you, “you sure, seems like you can barely look me in the eyes.” You furrowed your eyebrows. “what’s up with you guys, did something happen?” you hated feeling out of the loop. “just tell me don’t have my anxiety up all night for something stupid.” you sat on the couch, sitting the cups down on the table, giving them a quick glance at your boobs, really not helping the situation.
“spill now.” you said, jeongin decided to say something. “yesterday we saw something.” He said. “and me and felix don’t think it’s true.” Seungmin scoffed speaking up. “are you a cam girl?” he said, if he was gonna be thrown under the bus, he better get something out of it. “seungmin.” Felix said, turning to you. “you don’t have to answer— yeah.” They were stunned, you answered so quickly. “really?” felix took out his phone, clicking twittet, and you’ve put two and two together. “ah so you’ve found it.”
“so that’s you.” Jeongin said, felix pulling up the video. You grabbed the phone, the recent clip you uploaded to twitter playing in front of it. “I post this one yesterday, this was new.” Seungmin smirked, the other two baffled that you were so nonchalant about it. “I told you it was her, that birthmark is too specific.” He said, you turned to him.
“you? how’d you figure it out before him.” You pointed to jeongin. “we’ve lived together, we seen each other naked plenty of times.” you questioned. “yeah well felix has been jerking off to you for the past 3 weeks and hadn’t figured it out, clearly im the only smart one.” Felix face turned red. “why would you tell her that, yn I swear I didn’t it was you until yesterday.” He said, but it didn’t bother you. “felix im not embarrassed about what i do, i make content for people to watch.”
“but im your friend.” You shrugged. “the only reason i didn’t show my face is because i didn’t want to, not because i was afraid to.” you said. “did you like it at least?” his eyes widened. “huh?” you smirked. “did you at least like it?” he shyly nodded. “you looked good.” He said. “I know, I did.”
“you’re really cocky.” Seungmin spoke up. “its annoying.” You rolled your eyes. “whats annoying is instead of using your words and just saying you wanna fuck me, you try and get under my skin.” you bit back. “its been three years minnie , im not dumb, at least jeongin tried to hide it.” jeongins face turned read. “it took me a little longer to figure him out, but you, you don’t even hide it, you just try and hide it by petty bickering with me like you’re a kid.”
“yeah?” seungmin stood up from the chair, his body towering over your sitting one, you looked up at him, a smirk that he desperately want to take off painting on your face. “is that what gets you off when you’re fucking yourself with those toys, the thought of your best friends wanting to fuck you.”
He words slightly threw you off, because he wasn’t wrong, there was a few times on and off camera were you came to the thought of one of closest friends fucking you— it was him time to smirk. “what I tell you guys, girls like her are easy to read.” he said, his hand coming up to your hair, you allowed it, it was actually turning you on especially with the audience. “always desperate to be fuck, no matter who it is.” He said. “you’d fuck your viewers if you could wouldn’t you?” you whimpered as his hand tightened in your hair. “lets make the sluts dreams come true, felix is a viewer no?” he turned to the boy, who was shifting in his seat watching the scene go down. “felix get over here.”
He released your hair, his hand coming to the strap of the tanktop. “take it off, it's let doing much anyway, we can see your tits through the shirt anyway.” He moved to the side, allowing you to take the shirt off and for felix to move in his place. “go a head, suck him off you know you want to.” It was clear who was in charge of the whole thing now, and it wasn’t you.
“yo-you don’t have to.” Felix said, as hard as he was, he didn’t want to force you to do anything you didn’t want to do. “but i want to, I really do.” you said. “you heard her, so get over here and stop being such a pussy.” Seungmin said; felix got up replacing his spot, standing in front of you, his bulge in your face. “don’t just stare at it, take it out and suck him off.”
You undid the strings to his sweat, putting your hand in his pants, fishing his cock out. “fuck.” He sighed, as you stroked his cock. “you’re so big.” You kissed his tip, giving it a few kitty licks. “please put it in your mouth.” He moaned, his hands flying to your hair as soon as you took him into your mouth. “fuck.”
Jeongin watched this all play out and he was definitely not okay, watching you suck his friends cock did more to him than he thought it should, his cock ready to be freed. “yn.” he reached for your hand, seungmin watched him put your hand on his boner, you squeezed him through his jeans. ““don’t forget your precious innie, we all know how much you want to fuck him.” He said.
Jeongin unbuckled his jeans, pulling them down along with his underwear. “shit, stroke it for me.” He sighed as you moved your hand up and down on his shaft. “fuck.” He groaned, the living room filled with felix and jeongins moans; along with the noises coming from you as felix fucked your face. “fuck your mouth feels so good.”
“how about we film this?” seungmin said. “since you like being on camera so much.” He took out his phone. “I bet your viewers would love seeing you all slutted out like this.” He hit record on his phone, recording you having your face fucked your best friend while you slowly jerked off your other best friend. “there we go our own little yn loves being fucked on camera.”
You felt felix speeding up, the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat, making you gag around him. “fuck im gonna cum.” He whimpered, pushing your head down, making you take his cock all the way down to his pubic bone. “shit im cumming.” He grunted, his cock twitching— ropes of his cum shooting down your throat. “shit.” He pulled his cocked out your mouth, letting you finally breathe. “that felt so fucking good.”
“here hold this.” Seungmin handed the phone to felix. “i want this slutty cunt first.” He said. “lay on your side.” He commanded, you compiled; jeongins cock in your face. “why do you get to fuck her first?” Seungmin glared at felix.
“earlier you both were about to throw me under the bus and im the only one who hasn’t acted like a pussy this entire time.” He said. “now hold the camera right.”
He pulled your shorts off your legs, along with your panties. “look at that wet cunt.” He lifted your leg. “show the camera her slutty wet cunt.” You felt his fingers brush across your cunt, as felix moved closer with the camera.
“so fucking messy.” He finally freed himself from his pants, lining himself up with your hole. “gonna stretch this cunt better than those toys you fuck.” You felt him entering you. “fuck seungmin.” You moaned. “jesus this cunt is so tight.” He grunted, holding your leg up, straddling your other one as he fucked you. “those dildos must not be working.”
Felt jeongins hand on your boob, playing with your nipples; your head in his lap, right where his cock was. “suck him off.” Felix said, his eyes much darker than before, and now full of lust. “fuck, you heard him do it.” Seungmin said, you took him into your mouth, he squeezed your boob, groaning as you took him fully. “oh fuck.” Jeongin held your head down, seungmin fucking into you much fast, forcing you on his cock more, gagging around his length. “shit im gonna cum.”
Seungmin on the other hand felt his orgasm approaching, vigorously fucking your cunt. “fuck im gonna cum all over this cunt.” You moaned around jeongins length. “fuck, do that again and im gonna cum down your throat.”
Felix watched through the phone, his cock getting hard again. “shit this is so hot.” He groaned, watching you struggle to fit jeongin into your mouth due to the angle while seungmin fucked you. “fuck im cumming.” Seungmin groaned, pulling out as his cock twitched, as he came all over your cunt. “shit such a messy slut.” He slapped your cunt. “fuck felix you’ll have fun with her, real tight cunt.”
Jeongin bucked up into your mouth a few times , grabbing the back of your head. “fuck im cumming!” he finally released himself in your mouth. “shit.”
Felix replaced seungmin, handing the phone off to jeongin, rubbing figure eights on your clit. “wanna make you cum first.” He stuffed his fingers inside you. “fuck you really are tight.” He scissored you open. “fu-fuck lix, please make me cum.” You whined. “you heard her lix , make the slut cum.” He removed his fingers, replacing it with his cock. “lixie!” you squealed, he shut his eyes as your cunt squeezed him. “oh fuck your pussy feels good.”
“lixie im gonna cum.” You moaned out. “go a head, show the camera how you cum.” Hearing those words from the boy who was too shy to do anything a few minutes ago was all you need to make you cum. “oh fuck you’re squeezing my dick.” He grunted, fucking into you faster. “shit im gonna cum.” felix pulled out, stroking his cock, letting him cum spill all over your stomach. “fucking hell.”
The camera still rolling as you took a few breaths. “you want more?” seungmin said, taking the camera back, you nodded. “let’s give the whore what she wants then.” You sat up, jeongin grabbed your waist. “show the camera how you ride, do to me what you did to that stupid toy.” Jeongin said in your ear, his voice low. “come on, sit on my cock.” He held your waist, letting you slowly engulf his cock. “oh fuck.” He groaned, as you fully sat down on him. “move for me.”
You began to move up and down on his cock moaning out his name as his hand came up to your boob, squeezing. “look at the pretty slut.” Seungmin grab your face, the camera on you. “want you to suck me off.” He said, handing the camera back to felix. “come on open that mouth, you can take one more cock.” He said tapping his tip of your tongue. “suck.”
Felix got up, his cock still rock hard, bobbing against his stomach as he held the camera in his hands. “can you help me out?” you hummed , your mouth full of seungmin, taking him into your hand , letting his fuck you hand. “fuck squeeze it just a little.” He moaned out, fuck your fist. “fuck im gonna cum all over your tits.” He groaned.
“look at the slut, so cock drunk.” Seungmin said, jeongin bouncing you on his cock. “letting us use you like this -fuck- gonna let me cum all over your face.” His hips snapped against your face, making you take his cock all the way down your throat.
You moaned out, clenching down on jeongin as you came for the second time ,he hissed. “oh fuck , im gonna cum.” He groaned, you clenched again. “fuck get up.” he lifted you off of him, just in time too, cause soon he was cumming, some of it getting on your stomach and thighs. “fuck.” He rubbed your clit. “fuck cum for us again.” He grunted in your ear.
Felix came second, cursing out as he came all over your tits. “sh-shit so pretty.” His hands came to your boobs, toying with your nipples while jeongin played with your clit. “cum one more time for the camera.” Felix coaxed you. “you can do it, pretty go ahead and cum.” You gasped out, letting the knot in your stomach snapping. “fuck.” You felt your juices spray out of you. “fuck she squirted.”
“good slut, gonna cum all over your faace as a reward.” Seungmin pulled out of your mouth a trail of spit following as he stroked his cock until he came covering your face with his seed. “look at you all covered in cum.” He scooped a little bit of cum off your lip, pushing it into your mouth. “suck.” He said.
Felix stopped the camera, finally letting you rest. “you okay, do you need anything?” he said. “A shower.” Your voice was gone. “jesus we did number on you.” Seungmin teased, you shot him the finger with a eye roll. “oh really, think you could go for another round right.” Your eyes widened. “stay away from me.” You said.
Felix helped you in the shower, jeongin knocking on the door. “I need some pants, you made a mess on me.” Your face heated up. “so-sorry, there’s some sweatpants in my drawer that are way too big for me in my drawer.” He smiled. “and don’t worry about it, i would’ve been upset had it been anyone else.”
“i got you some clothes out to wear.” Felix said, all of them now standing in your bedroom as you walked out. “thank you lix at least you care about my wellbeing.” Seungmin scoffed as you kissed felixs cheek. “well how about I call the food delivery back and tell them not to come.”
“and I picked your favorite movie and got it all ready so we can watch it in here so you don’t have to sit on your uncomfortable couch.” Jeongin said now in a pair of sweats. “hmm, well thank you.” You changed into your clothes, climbing into bed. “I found your draw of toys.” Seungmin opened the drawer. “jesus you are into some crazy shit.” He said, picking up the various toys. “se-seungmin put those down and come sit down.” Felix said with red ears. “fine.” He picked up the vibrator one last time, lifting his eyebrow to show you, you covered face. “seungmin.” Jeongin pulled him to his seat. “im done, im done, jesus she just took three cocks on camera yet she’s all shy now.”
“send me that video.” You said, felix feeding you some of the chicken seungmin ordered. “why?” jeongin said. “memories innie.” You said sarcastically. “why else?” you said. “she gonna post it.” Seungmin said. “but your face is in it, you sure?” felix said, you shrugged. “I don’t care, it’s hot and I don’t have to film next week.” you said. “you guys don’t mind it right? I mean I can blur you out.” You said.
“I don’t care.” Jeongin said, felix agreeing. “I wouldn’t have filmed it had I not wanted it to be posted.” Seungmin said. “good, I’ll edit and post it next week, now I don’t have to film.” You said. “I can’t believe seungmin was the one to find out first, I always knew you were staring too hard that day you walked into my room.” You smirked, he scoffed.
“you were naked , of course I was starring.”
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©️LUVYENI
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marrycv · 7 months ago
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dealer!ellie x reader
warmings: smut, car sex, drug talks (weed), dom!ellie, sub!reader, kinda public sex?, swearing, no use of y/n just nicknames. i think thats pretty much all, tell me if i missed something
summary: Ellie has sold you weed a few days ago, you still haven’t give her money and ellie was growing impatient. She needed that money and you needed a new bag of weed. shes not gonna make this easy.
you were searching everywhere for some money, somewhere.. you had to have some left?! Today was the day Ellie said you’d have to pay her back or else- you don’t wanna think about it.
Ellie was the dealer of your college, well not the only one, but the only one who wasn’t super expensive and she looked good, so she was your favourite one. She always had that brown leather jacket and those dirty boots on her. Like she had some kind of attachment to it, she always wore it. What was even more attractive was that she had some dirty smudge eyeliner. not too much but not like it was not enough.
Plus, ellie played guitar and she was one of the rare lesbians in your school. Everything in your type… huh?
you were still looking around your dorm like you just lost something that cost 20K. As if.
Panicking, you received a text message from Ellie.
Ellie 🚬 : im in the parking, come in my car.
you : omw
You took vest and put it own and got out of your dorm. When you arrived in the parking you realized you still didn’t have any money… you were in serious trouble.
you saw Ellie’s old truck and got in. you greeted her with a small ‘hi’ and you look ashamed. Ellie knew that look.
“you dont have the money? is that why you’re so quiet?” Ellie asked.
she saw right through your mind.
she always did
“i know.. im sorry you said it was my last chance.. i just really dont have anything right now and- i dont have weed anymore. no money, no weed… im so sorry” you said as you were feeling so dumb to not pay her back
“fuck.. i really need that money, i gave you two weeks, which i usually dont do” Ellie said, like she was fucking disappointed in you.
“i’d do anything to pay you back, i swear!”
Suddenly, ellie checked you up and down. she had to think for a minute. everything was everything.
and she needed something.
“anything huh?” Ellie repeated
“please i just dont want you to sell me to some freak…” you were saying some kind of nonsense, like a 19 years old would do that
“C’mon, you know i’d never do that to you” she replied
your eyes widened. she was sending goosebumps to your spine.
you sighed, relieved.
“what can i do to pay you, ellie?”
she nodded her head toward the back of her truck “sit back there” she said looking at you with her emerald eyes, piercing through your soul. she had that kind of power over you, and she knew it.
you did as she asked, no question asked either. just did as she told you to, like the good girl you were for her. Ellie smirked at how easy it was to make you do something, she smirked to see how much of power she had over you now that you would do absolutely anything to pay her back. but you also had the choice to just go back home and… her just, taking everything that would come as money for her. taking your tv or something, you owned her a lot of money.
ellie joined you in the back seat, manspreading, her knee touching yours.
you suddenly realized what was happening. like the dumb fool you were. now, your skirt felt too small, your crop top felt too revealing, your palms were sweaty and there was no turning back.
“so how much do you wanna get rid of that depth you have for me, doll?” That nickname made your heart skip a beat.
everything was happening so fast, at first you were saying how sorry you were and now..? ellie wanted to fuck you dumb, as a mother fucking punishment and for her own guilty pleasure.
“you’re gonna need some kind of consequences to your actions, you know that, right?” ellie asked you as she put a strand of hair behind your ear.
“mhm.. yeah” you tried to master. ellie was just making you insane.
she lighted up a joint and started to inhale some of it. her long and veiny fingers were around that joint, making your underwear slightly uncomfortably wet. you looked away when you catched yourself staring. staring like a fucking dog in heat. whatever, it wasn’t something new for someone like you when you were with someone like her.
Ellie handed you the joint, which you welcomely accepted. bringing it to your lips, making eye contact with her as you inhaled the smoke in your lungs. something you could never be tired to feel.
that tension. that tension that could be broke with one word.
you two just, smoked that joint in a painful quiet awful silence. you could hear the noises of your neighbours doing some kind of frat parties or some drunken men in the streets. your heart beating like crazy, you were sure she could hear it too. you were sure she could smell the nervousness out of you.
the way this all seemed normal for her to smoke with one of her untrusted clients. you would never give her the money at the time asked, ellie knew that obviously.
“sit here” ellie finally spoke as she finished her joint, and tapped her lap. you looked at her up and down, she was still manspreading. she was so mesmerizing, hypnotic, you just did as she asked, without asking for any questions. just like when she asked you to come sit in the back of her car.
you would actually do anything she asked
you sat on her lap. putting your hands on her shoulders to steady yourself. you felt something hard from her pants. which made you gasp.
ellie, would just fucking smirk
“i knew you wouldn’t have that money, princess. i just guessed that i had to find something else to make you useful to”
you felt your checks burning and your heart racing faster than it already was.
“you brought your-” before you could continue ellie cut you off
“my cock? yeah.. guessed you needed it to learn from your fucking dumb behaviour”
“i-“
“you dont have to say anything, doll..” she said as she shushed you. her slang finger cupped your lips, which she started to force it to get into your mouth. you opened wide for her, sucking on her fingers. moaning at the taste her fingers felt on your tongue, you could taste sweat and weed. you found yourself so fucking addicted to it.
she then, kissed you. into a sloppy french kiss, her tongue already in your mouth, dancing with yours. you could feel you wanting more, you could feel ellie wanting more- the way she was grabbing your neck with one hand and your hip with her other, to make you closer to her, as it was even possible. you moaned against her lips, which made ellie fucking crazy.
“so needy huh?” she asked more to herself than at you
her kisses went down to your neck and you found yourself titling your head to the side to give her more access and you also started rubbing yourself against her thigh. needing to add something on your clit that was aching in attention. you were in heaven yet, you wanted to go higher.
she felt you rubbing against her which she took both of her hands on your hips and helped guiding you. you were a whimpering mess and she was kissing the fuck out of your neck- probably making purple marks on it which you absolutely loved to feel. you loved to feel how she made them so you just didnt care if you would wake up tomorrow all purple.
“ellie..” you said, in a whine, needing more
“what? i need your words angel, speak up.”
“i-i need more, please” you were so desperate, you didn’t know how much more you could ask her but you wanted all of what she reserved for you.
“see? you’re such a good girl when you can baby” she said as her hands went on your thighs, making its way under it and under your underwear. But she obviously needed to take her time with you, she loved to tease you. your hips your rocking over her fingers that still haven’t even touched your clit. that made ellie go so fucking confident. the weed started its effects and you felt yourself so much more in need of her touch. you were 10 times more sensitive, ellie the same as you. she was literally holding herself to not stretch you open with her 7inches dick she got just for you.
her fingers did its way under your underwear. running your juices everywhere on your pussy- making you jolt in pain. you just couldn’t take it. you just couldnt endure all that torture.
“ellie, fuck… please”
“dont be so impatient, you fucking deserve it- you little fucking slut, thinking you’ll get that as a reward, yeah? nah, your fucking wrong. so so wrong. your gonna have to wait, princess”
her nasty comments were just making you wetter and wetter. you just could moan at her words as her fingers were everywhere but your clit.
she finally decided to add some pressure on it. making your back arch at the sudden pression you desperately needed.
after a moment, she turned you, making your back face her. she took off her pants and took off your skirt and underwear. you were a bit curious but at the same time you knew what you were about to get.
but you were still surprised when the tip of her strap entered into your hole. making you gasp.
“take fucking it” ellie said whispering in your ear as she started to trust into you without any mercy. she wasn’t soft, didn’t let you adjust for her. it hurted so good.
“ellie! fuck” you moaned out, the pain was turning into pleasure as you started to trust your hips with her trusts.
as she was fucking you dumb with her dick, she brought her hand against your clit and did circle motions against it, which made you cry in pleasure. you needed to be quieter or the whole city would wake up.
Ellie placed her free hand on your neck and threatened you to be quiet while we mouvements were going surprisingly faster as you thought that wasn’t even possible.
she had no mercy and your cries made her only rougher against you. the strap was hitting just perfectly on her clit which made some grunts escape from her beautiful lips.
“els! im gonna- im gonna cum!” you said as you felt your high approaching.
“dont you fucking dare!” ellie said as she was trying to reach her orgasm with trusting in you harder and faster.
her mouvements started to stutter and she was slowing down, she was reaching it
“fuck cum with me yeah?” ellie said as you both then came together.
“fuuuuuckkkk!” you moaned as she was still in you, riding out your orgasm. never had one that powerful, it felt like fireworks. she made you feel something none else could ever make you feel.
“you did so good for me doll.”
you smiled as you both cleaned each others up
this is my first fanfic here, i hope yall enjoyed it 😭
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chosotallgf · 2 months ago
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DOUBLE IDENTITY #2 - TOJI FUSHIGURO
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🔙 previous chapter Next chapter🔜
SYNOPSIS y/n is a third year college student who is about to intern for the top business company in Japan in a week, what happens when she unknowingly cross paths with her future boss not knowing he's hiding a secret.
WARNINGS mafiaboss toji x fém!reader, geto x fém! reader, alcohol, moderate au, sexual activity, criminal activity & behavior, naoya is his own warning, angst & fluff (not really lol) not proof read
p.s my work is only on A03 & tumblr!
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Fast forward arriving at the club, shoko usually gets us in faster by talking to the bouncer. So happen she found out he was the guy she fake flirts with at the gym she ‘occasionally’ goes to. She said he landed a job here not so long ago, that he needed the extra money and was helping out a friend. Finally stepping into the club it was pack as hell no wonder utahime wanted to get here as soon as possible.
This is one of the main popular clubs in the city, surprisingly it’s not just made up of college students in the area but locals come here as often too. As i squeeze through the crowd trying to keep up with my girls I can feel the loud bass of the club music in my chest. turning around shoko grabs my hand “come on I hear the the DJ is playing lots American of music tonight” she said while smiling. I haven’t listen too much to American music in my life time but if I had to pick it would be ‘Les’ by childish Gambino to be played at least once.
Reaching the other side of the club where the bar is utahime puts in a few orders of drinks than shoko, we usually always order something stronger each time we come here. not paying attention to what she was saying I happen to look down at the bartender hands, oddly his knuckles were bruise and you could tell they had been bloody by how dark they were from his pale skin but I guess that’s what happen when you work at a popular club with crazy drunks who don’t care. snapping out of my glaze when he clears his throat and utter “and what would you like ma’am?”
Now Looking up at his face trying to get out of my head “um can I have 3 margaritas and 1 rum coke pls?” I rely but soon enough utahime & shoko look at my funny they both know I have a low tolerance when it comes to drinking but I still do it anyways.
“What?” I question them “aren’t we suppose to have fun tonight like we planned, so I say fuck it” utahime smiles wides “you sure? You know you can just start off-“ but she gets cut off by the bartender guy “if she wants to have that much to drink let her life short” I nodded in agreement with him “see? nothing wrong that’s tomorrow me problem” “fine but don’t call us when you feel miserable from a hangover” utahime mumbles. “You should go find us a free section, we will bring the drinks out and find you” shoko slaps my shoulder from behind.
Off and further from where I left, I can’t find a free section maybe ‘maybe I should try the other side this club is huge tho’. Not looking forward I bump straight in to the chest of a man? I tumble backward but luckily before I could fall he catches my back. Now we are super close chest to chest i get a clear vision of his face despite the all black hoodie he’s wearing. dark dead eyes with a noticeable cut on one side of his lip. He’s staring back into my eyes This feeling of closeness is getting intimidating I wonder if he realizes his hands are clutching more firm on my lower back. I start to panic
“Omg I’m so sorry” I can feel heat in my face now. I can tell he was lost in thought too because as soon as I said that he quickly turned his face and pulls his hoodie down over his eyes and let’s go making me find my balance again. “Pay attention next time” he speaks in an aggressive but low tone. “I know I know I was just looking for a sect-“ he cuts and moves me out his way saying “tch, whatever” he mumbles as he walks to the private section area. how fucking rude I think.
Im surprise the club didn’t kick him out for being suspicious with a hoodie on in here, they honestly should after that. next think I know shoko is now in front of me yelling over the loud music clearly trispy “y/n stop standing around and come over here we found a spot” shoko starts pulling me along with her.
I get to our own section i assume but see two guys, both of them I recognize as utahime and shoko childhood friends. “since you couldn’t do a simple task I had to ask this dickhead here to let us sit” “you should be lucky, I wasn’t even planning on being here tonight, my usual dealer been Mia and I need stuff for next Thursday party” he wines.
“Anyways let’s get to drinking we’re wasting time” I grab and drowned the 2 cups of margaritas “well someone is in a hurry” I hear the other guy next to gojo say “I’m suguru geto” he reaches his hand out to me to shake. I do the same “I’m y/n and yeah I just wanna let loose tonight” his hands are so soft and firm I wonder if his long hair feels the same. “No judgement here me and satoru are about to do the same” “sooo shall we finally get started or what?” shoko utter as smoke leaves her mouth.
author note ~ if you are seeing this when it’s first posted I will post chapter 3 later on during the day it’s 5am rn for me and I can’t sleep lol. if you wanna be tagged in that just lmk :) 9/8/24
likes and reblog are appreciated
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badasmuse · 10 months ago
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“Homewrecker Pt.3”
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Bada Lee x Reader
Warnings: 18+ (MDNI), language, lowercase intended, angst, fluff- yeah
Summary: bada hires a babysitter.. but you own a daycare, why does she need one?
you and bada have now been together for about seven months now. you finally opened your own daycare and you have never loved anything more (besides bada and chae of course.)
your life has been great recently, except for the fact that bada has hired another babysitter.
it’s not that you were insecure about it. you know that saying how you get them is how you lose them, but that’s not the problem. the problem is why is she paying for a babysitter when her girlfriend owns a daycare? this was an argument you had a few times a week.
“y/n why are you so upset about this?” bada asks, taking off her makeup from the day.
“bada do you understand how dumb it is to pay a random to watch your kid when you have a girlfriend that owns a daycare? you don’t even have to pay me and chae loves me. she’s comfortable with me. why the fuck would you bring a stranger around her?” you say with a ‘the fuck’ look on your face.
“it sounds like you’re scared i’m gonna do to you what i did to howl.” she says.
“im not worried about that. i know no bitch will fuck you as well as i do. you’re too scared to look at other girls. why would i be scared?”
“i fell for you because you were sweet not cause you fuck me good.” she mumbles.
“doesn’t matter. like i said, you’re too scared to look at other girls. females approach you and you hide being me. i don’t think you’re gonna do anything i just think you’re dumb for wasting money. you could be putting that shit in chae’s college fund!” you say frustrated.
“don’t you get tired of having this argument every night?” bada asks.
“don’t you?” you reply. “if you’re tired of it then fire the bitch. put chae in my daycare.”
okay the babysitter isn’t a bitch she’s actually really nice but you’re pissed so anything is gonna come out of your mouth at this point.
“goodnight y/n.” bada says changing and laying in bed.
you look at her in disbelief and grab your pillow and a blanket before walking downstairs to the couch.
this goes on for another week. you started staying at your daycare longer than you needed to which pissed bada off.
it was day six of you staying till nine in the daycare when bada snapped.
“we’re closed!” you called out, doing some cleaning. you could’ve sworn you locked that door.
“is this what you do? sit here and clean to avoid having to see me at home?” bada says, leaning against the door.
ah right, she has the spare key.
“bada i’m busy.” you say putting the toys in new areas.
she sits on the couch, “chae is with her grandmother. i have time.”
“every talk is an argument bada. why would i want to come home to that?” you say angrily.
“because you argue with me! you start every single argument we have. over absolutely nothing!”
“because you’re still paying for a babysitter when you have me!”
“y/n i understand your frustration but there’s a reason i-“ you cut her off, slamming the toy box against the wall.
“what reason? what could possibly be valid enough to waste money like that?” you raise your voice.
bada doesn’t respond. she bites her lip before nodding her head and leaving.
you decided to stay the night in the daycare after that.
——
after about a week of spending the night in the daycare, you went home. you and bada need to have a talk. you sigh walking into the house when you hear sniffling.
“and i’m not sure what to do. we’ve just been arguing.” you hear your girlfriend say. “she hasn’t been home all week i just…”
“maybe you should break up with her. you’re sitting here crying over someone that doesn’t care about you.” you hear the babysitter say. you walk closer and see them sitting on the couch. you want to interrupt but something tells you not to.
the babysitter, you don’t really care about her name, leans closer to bada, wiping her tears. “you’re very pretty, you shouldn’t be crying over her.” she whispers before leaning in attempting to kiss the crying woman.
you step out but bada backs up. “woah,” she sniffles, “i might be crying over my girlfriend but i’m still very much with her and in love with her. i mean the whole point in me hiring you was cause i didn’t want chae spoiling the proposal. i love my girlfriend.”
“proposal?” you say out loud, cringing after you’re caught.
“baby…” bada says quietly.
you hold your hand up, “you need to leave.” you say to the person sitting on the couch.
“whatever. i could’ve treated her better.” she says standing and grabbing her stuff.
as she walked out of the house, you pushed her before slamming the door in her face. not knowing (or caring) if she fell.
“y/n.” bada sniffles.
“you were.. gonna propose to me?” you question.
“well yeah. chae… chae can’t hold water. remember when she spoiled your birthday necklace? it was convenient having the babysitter cause she can get all the energy out and by the time you get home she’s sleep or she forgot all about it.”
you feel tears hit your eyes, “bada.. fuck i’m the worst girlfriend ever.” you pull her into a hug.
“you’re not the worst ever. but you kinda suck.” bada says making you guys fall to the couch then cuddling into your chest.
“i’m so sorry.” you whisper into her hair. “i love you so much. i promise i’ll spend forever making it up to you.” your hand rubs her back.
“mhm.” she mumbles. she closes her eyes enjoying the feeling.
then chae runs down the stairs. “mommy!! oh.. hi y/n!! did mommy propose to you already?” she asks climbing on bada’s back after noticing the tears in your eyes.
bada groans, “see what i mean?”
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Taglist (open! comment to be added!): @waveartistry @sun-nyy @yngtort @elliesblkgirlfriend @jennamc75 @m0r0s1111 @seungxstar @badasbebe @lil-elliesgf @currentfications
a/n: this is gonna have like 2-3 parts😭love y’all
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drunkwhenimadethis · 7 months ago
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I was confessing my absurd fears to my bf with things along the lines of being betrayed or him finding other women sexually attractive and asked if he had any similar fears. He said he did, and it was that I was only with him for his money. Essentially: I am a gold digger. I have always refused monetary gifts and him paying for things. However I’ve been staying with him for three months after he got me kicked out of my last rooming house because Im in college and couldn’t find a place quick enough, and was extremely adamant about it but he insisted. We’ve been together for almost a year. He said that the thought of me using him for money is recurring, but he’s unemployed and his parents pay for everything besides his groceries. What do I make of this? It’s really offput me that he thinks of me this way
Disclaimer I love to remember that the English “advice” comes from the Latin “videre” to see so if I give you this advice it is not a prescription, it is only my way of looking at things in this moment
I think one thing I would like to point out is that you wrote: “It was that I was only with him for his money. Essentially: I am a gold digger.” There are a million ways of interpreting a single statement made by someone that we care about, and since so much of life creation begins with storytelling in the mind, you want to be quite meticulous about the interpretations that you align with and carry forward. I don’t think that “Essentially: I am a gold digger” makes the most sense logically nor in terms of experiencing what you want, which I assume is love, commitment, trust, and closeness
Why essentially are you a gold digger? Did he say that or did he say that he has an absurd fear that you might be with him for reasons other than who he himself is? “Money” —the word—and its associations make us react emotionally and indignantly “How dare you!!!!” but he said the same thing that you said, he shared the fear he has that maybe he alone is not enough for you
When you shared that you’re fearful of him being attracted to other women, did he say that essentially you are calling him a dishonest whore with no dick discipline? Would that make sense to you if he reacted that way or would you feel like hmm, this man is really making my fears about himself?
Your fears are yours and yours alone
I am guilty of wanting the perfect words or actions to assuage me but it never works out that way. You need to go into yourself and pour love on your fears and kill them
He can tell you everything you want to hear and then what happens when he’s out of sight?
What happens if he has to leave the country? What happens if you can’t have eyes on him?
Are we doomed to constantly revert back to fear?
See yourself as the only one 
Don’t entertain competition in your mind
Don’t dwell on these fears. Your subconscious can’t reason with you
Remove the negative imaginary conversations—not only are they a waste of time, they are by nature of reality active forces 
Be happy for him that his family takes care of him, not everyone gets that and it’s good
Imagine he will take care of you like his family taught him to. Imagine sturdiness and dependability. Imagine better than what you know
Wish him the best on his job search, remove safety-seeking in the form of judgment
You are deserving and you’re allowed to accept gifts from your boyfriend. Work on this asap, I think there's something in you that just doesn't feel worth it and you can't outrun that and nobody can appease that for long
And don't tell yourself that he got you kicked out of your last rooming house, even if it seems true. If you can choose any belief and create life with it, since you’re creating even when you’re not consciously aware that you’re doing so, why don’t you choose something that serves you both more? Why not tell yourself that the universe is conspiring to bring you closer to each other?
Loving and fearless! Avanti!
“The beautiful idea you awaken in yourself shall not fail to arouse its affinity in others.”
94 notes · View notes
days-until-burnout · 4 months ago
Note
I was wondering if maybe you could write a bit of gribeans? Sperate from the bad boys I mean. But totally fine if im asking too much. Love your fics sm!!
i can! i very much can! i am willing to give a try to any hermit or life series member (even some from empires, even thought i dont know much from them aside from overlapping members). and dont worry, you arent asking too much :] feel free to request whatever you want, because i am an adult and i know how to adult with content lastly, thank you, glad youre enjoying the fics<3
_____
📧 Day 28 -
Characters - Grian/Joel ft Jimmy, Scar & Bdubs Words - 1,520 Time - 45 mins Content - College AU
Grian looked himself over in the mirror for the twelfth time, meticulously looking for a flaw or hair out of place. Normally, he wouldn’t bother with unimportant things, but one didn’t go out with some rich guy every night, so he had to make an impression. He gripped the edge of the sink, pressing his lips into a thin line, almost desperate to find something wrong. He hadn’t even eaten anything to make sure he had nothing in his teeth, and for once, he had been going to sleep at a reasonable time for a week to avoid getting bags under his eyes. He had brushed his teeth three times in the morning, twice in the afternoon, used mouthwash and floss in between to avoid bad breath. He even showered twice, once when he woke up and one recently. And his clothes, although not new, he had washed and ironed them and kept them pristine the day he convinced Joel to go on a date. 
Okay. Alright. Fine. He was doing too much. But this was important. Very important. Because Joel had money, and Joel seemed fun, but more importantly, Joel had money.
He could hear his flatmates making a loud mess outside, the walls were thin. They could probably even hear him overthinking and how desperate he was. 
When his hand slipped from the sink, he finally snapped out of it. He grabbed his phone, checking himself on the room a final time before stepping out of the bathroom to the noise. He walked the corridor to the living room, plopping himself on the couch as Jimmy, Scar and Bdubs played like they were at the Olympics. With practice, he turned out their screaming and screeching and cheering, turning his attention to his phone. Twenty past six, ten more minutes until Joel would arrive. He unlocked his phone and decided to finally answer messages, freezing when he came face to face with his chat with Joel. 
Something so small like a wink, it was just a semicolon and a close parenthesis, yet it made his heart and stomach overturn like he’d never been on a date before. 
He slid his thumb across the screen to exit the chat, glossing over the unanswered messages. His peace, however, lasted a total of half a minute, because the room suddenly plummeted into silence, and Grian knew it was bad. Very bad. 
“Sooooo,” Jimmy said first. Grian glanced at the top of his phone, subtly looking at Jimmy who was facing him, no doubt grinning like the idiot he was. “Excited? Nervous? Do you want us to follow to make sure this random guy doesn’t break your heart?”
“Oh! Yes, we should!” Bdubs jumped in, which at least assured Grian of the thought that they had somehow discussed this between them. 
“Oh, god, no, don’t you dare!” He looked up from his phone, glare instantly finding Jimmy. He glanced at the other two, finding matching, bright and sparkly eyes. If time travel ever became available, he would pay whatever it was needed and stop his past self from flatting with this trio. “Plus, you three, against him? No chance. No chance.”
“Oh, come on, G. You don’t have to hype him up!” Scar said, and the other two nodded. Dogs. They were all dogs. And Grian so, so regretted not having moved in with Cleo and Scott. Maybe next semester. Yeah. That was a plan. He would do that as soon as he could. “Also! You need to remember, Joel is shorter than us. And we are three against one. It would give you enough time to run away, at least.”
Grian scoffed, turned his head away as he got up. He walked to the kitchen, cringing when he heard them standing up, footsteps following him. As calmly as he could, he grabbed a glass and poured some water into it, trying to calm his nerves or try to not throw the water on their faces. 
They continued to talk, loud voices that he made white noise. Then his phone pinged, and he quickly grabbed it, smiled at the notification. Nonchalantly, he walked out of the kitchen then out of their flat, quietly closing the door behind him. He speed-walked the side of the building to the street, a sigh of relief escaping him when he found Joel’s car parked right there. Without thinking or waiting for him to get out, he jumped in, rapidly clicking his belt on. 
Joel laughed, “Couldn't wait to see me?”
“You have no idea,” he joked with an eyeroll. 
Soon enough, they were driving off. 
>>>
Turned out, Joel was more than a pretty face. Joel was a pride monster, boastful and loud, and he’d probably fit right in with Jimmy, Scar and Bdubs. That aside, Joel liked showing off, and Grian couldn’t even be mad, because Joel had reasons to show off. After yet another strike and loud cheer, Grian wondered if he somehow rigged the whole bowling lane. Joel had that kind of money, and liked to spend it like that too.
“Aw, don’t look so salty, Grian. I’ll buy you some ice cream to cheer you up.” Joel giggled, but his lips were twisted into a smirk, and even that was… Ah, it was whatever. He smiled back at him, eyebrow raised as Joel grinned innocently. 
“How generous.”
“Plenty.” 
They grabbed their empty plates and cups, throwing them away as they exited the lane. The place was full and bustling, and Grian was glad to have reserved their time. In an act of bravery, Grian leaped and grabbed Joel’s hand, relaxing when he noticed him blush. He smirked to his surprise. 
“Wouldn’t want to lose you in the crowd, now, do we?”
Joel blinked, then huffed, smiling, “Sure, sure. Just admit you want to be by my side. I don’t mind.”
“You’re as rich as you’re self-centered.”
“Aw, you think I’m charming?”
Grian scoffed, but they walked hand in hand, and that was enough to counter his pounding heart. 
>>>
They walked about in the mall, chatting about their courses and their friends, giggling about work and their flatmates. One time, he yanked Joel from walking into a stand, their bodies crashing as his back hit the wall. They stared at each other, blinking a couple times before breaking into a fit of giggles. Their hands stayed with each other, shoulder to shoulder, and it was nice. Very nice. Grian almost thought he should’ve asked him out sooner. 
At some point, they stopped on some grassy bit with bean bags and chairs, fake grass under shelter, probably somewhere for kids to play but there were none so they sat down. They shared a bucket of cotton candy, talking about all the annoyances of life. Usually, Grian kept them bottled up for nights with a drink, but Joel’s petty suggestions and cute faces made it worth it. At least he was letting it all out, which was good to an extent. And Joel seemed to trust him enough to share too, stories he promised to keep secret even if Joel hadn’t asked that of him. It felt like a teenage dream, talking and laughing with his crush so openly. 
Grian got brave again, heart beating on his throat, he ripped a piece of cotton candy while Joel was talking, then raised it to him but not fully to his mouth. It was a risk, a big one, and he pushed down the trembles when Joel stopped talking, looking at him with curiosity. 
Joel’s lips brushed the side of his finger, his face lighting up in heat as Joel kept eye contact before leaning back, cotton candy on his tongue. He watched him pull his tongue back, closing his lips into a smile. He swallowed, eyes flickering between his bobbing Adam’s apple and lips, back and forth before looking up to his eyes. Joel stared back, amused and content, almost mischief in his eyes. 
“You wanted me to shut up so badly?”
He shook his head. He barely heard the words, once again fixated on his lips. It was too early. Much too early. 
Oh, whatever. 
Grian pushed himself up, getting on his knees with a hand on the fake grass, hovering above him before pressing his lips on him. A hand crept to the back of his neck, reassuring as Joel did the actual kissing. Joel smiled as he did, tilting his head slightly to be more comfortable. It was just a couple seconds, but long enough that Grian would never forget. 
Grian jumped back in fright when he subconsciously recognized the gasps. He turned and looked up to see the troublemaker trio looking at them with wide eyes. Still at a distance, but quickly getting closer. His head snapped to the side when Joel grabbed his hand, the other grabbing their cotton candy bucket, quickly tugging him to his feet. He got up clumsily, wanting to yell at his friends but his attention was on him, on his mischievous, sparkling eyes. 
“Whe—”
“C’mon, my car’s faster.” Joel grinned, and Grian knew he was in good hands. 
_____
so.... lots of 45mins writing lol what a coincidence. anyhow, i said im revealing who i am on day 100, well, i have a surprise for day 30! and that's gonna be that im taking a week break lol i have to do some writing for events and i have personal writing to sort out too. but worry not, i will be back. seven days is not that long honestly in the meantime, i guess, feel free to send requests if you want. there are currently 6 asks waiting (all will be answered after the break, most likely), so feel free to send more :]
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getwhore · 10 months ago
Text
Come & See Me
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❀Summary : Nothing major, just loverboy connie & his girlfriend.
❀cw : None really, whooole lotta fluff (barely any smut, very subjective at the end.)
❀Notes : YALLLL...I'm back (prolly not for long.) had a long hiatus, college is no joke. decided to put something together while im on break. not proofread so ntm. like always if u enjoy plssss like & reblog. asks are always open my loves <3
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“Amour, when are you finally gonna come ‘n see me? Been missing you.”
Hearing his soft, but deep voice emitting through your phone’s speaker made your stomach flutter.
Connie had been in France for a few weeks now for ‘business’. Most men can handle being away from their partners for months or years at a time. Connie does not fall into that category. He’s definitely on the clingier side, not being able to handle being away from you for longer than a couple of hours. He’d been begging you since the day he left to come with him, but every time you turn him down.
“I told you Con, I gotta wait for my paycheck.” You sighed as you curled the ginger colored hair around your curling iron. “Tickets to France are not cheap. And I’ve been missin’ you too, a lot.”
“Then lemme pay for your ticket. You be actin’ like imma make you pay me back or somethin’.”
You set the iron down and face your phone. Seeing Connie’s face in that lighting truly did make you wonder how you bagged that. Connie looked at you still, waiting for your response. You knew Connie had more than enough money to pay for your ticket, maybe even your whole family’s ticket if you wanted him to. You just hated having him spend so much money on you and you can barely afford to spoil him back. Even though he refuses to allow you to, you still want to give him as much love back as he’s given to you.
“Connie no. You already do too much with that spoiling shit. I wanna get it on my own, you know that.”
He sighed, rubbing his eyes in frustration. “Damn mami, stop being so damn stubborn. Just lemme help you.”
You picked up your curling wand again, twisting the ginger loc of hair around it. The more you thought about it, who were you to deny Connie? You knew if you said no, he’d just keep asking. That’s how you got the new Birkin hanging from your wall, and the bouquet of flowers sitting on your dining table, and the ginger lace you’re curling as you look at his puppy dog eyes. Finally, you give in. 
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yes. You can buy the ticket.”
“Merci, mon amour.”
“Just don’t buy me no first class shit Connie. I’m serious.”
He just chuckled as he booked your tickets on his computer. A few minutes later, you got an email. Looking at the message, you saw Connie had booked a ticket for early the next morning, and it was first class. You rolled your eyes and removed the wrap from your head. You fluffed your hair and fixed your edges before walking to your closet for an outfit.
“Matter of fact, iré a buscarte yo mismo.” Connie mumbled under his breath.
“What’d you say Con?”
“Lemme call you back mami.”
You said goodbye and heard the dial tone a little after. You continued searching for an outfit, finally finding one. When you finished getting dressed, you grabbed your phone from your vanity and headed out of your room.
As you made your way to the kitchen, your phone rang. Picking it up was like holding up a mirror. You saw Connie’s contact at the top of your phone, but took the time to adjust your hair a little. After a few seconds you accepted the call, waiting for the reception to pick up before seeing Connie’s face in the camera. You sucked your teeth.
“Damn, Connie. You close enough to the phone or what?”
He chuckled, pulling his phone farther away from his face. He set it up on his desk before rummaging through his room. He was out of view, but every few seconds he’d throw a pile of clothes in the opposite direction. You squint your eyes, waiting a few seconds to confirm that what you were seeing was what you were really seeing. After a moment, you saw another pile of clothes fly in and back out of view again.
“Connie, what the fuck do you have goin’ on over there?”
You damn near choked on your water as he walked back into frame. He was shirtless, sporting a pair of sweatpants that were slightly too big for him as they sagged at his waistline. He bent over to look at you through the phone, flashing a smile. Damn near blinded you.
“Regarde-toi, tu es belle, bébé.” Connie muttered, licking his lips sensually.
You didn't completely understand what he was saying, but you knew enough to know what he was saying. It made your face heat up a little. You cleared your throat, maintaining your composure.
“Merci, Connie, but what are you doing over there?”
“I said it earlier, miel, I’m gonna come and get you.”
“Come and get me from where, Connie?”
“From the airport, duh. Cmon mami, I know you aren't that slow.”
You rolled your eyes, flipping Connie off before grabbing your keys from your kitchen counter. You locked the house up and started up your car, setting your phone in the phone stand beside the steering wheel.
You and Connie went back and forth during your drive. He complained about you not letting him buy your clothes, you complained about him begging to buy your clothes, and then complained about yourself being ‘too nice’ by giving in. 
“Sabes que no quiero que pagues por nada, cariño.”
“Ingles, Connie. You know my Spanish ain’t good.”
“You know I don’t need you payin’ for nothing mama, it’s all on me.”
You rolled your eyes, turning the engine off and stepping out of the car. You locked the doors, heading to the entrance.
“What store you at, mama?”
You giggled, walking into the front door and greeting a few employees. “Well, since it's on you, I need some more Fenty. I’m at Ulta, baby.”
Connie quietly winced, packing a few buds into his grinder.
“Pace yourself, you know how you get in Ulta, and Sephora, and all these other places.”
You rolled your eyes, walking to the foundation aisle. You picked up and tested multiple bottles of foundation, finding the right shade. Dropping it into your basket, you continued to wander around. You got to the hair product aisle, looking at the hair curlers and blow dryers. You picked one up, looking at the box before hearing Connie’s nagging on the phone again.
“No lo compre. You have enough curling irons.”
“But I don't have enough blow dryers. You know what Connie, how are you gonna tell me to buy what I want, but when I do issa problem.”
Connie coughed after taking a rip from his bong. He set the glass on his table, looking at you with small eyes.
“Not a problem, baby. Just tryna teach you better spending habits, that's all. But, if you want the iron then buy it, amour.”
You finished up your shopping, moving from Ulta to other clothing stores in the mall. Once you finished, it was almost 4PM. You took a quick trip to grab some food before finally making it home. You tossed your bags onto your bed, shuffling to the kitchen to pour yourself a glass of wine. As you plop onto the sofa, glass of wine in hand, you finally let yourself relax. Connie was still on the other line (and had been for hours) but he was silent aside from the occasional background noises. You stared at him on the screen, watching as he paid close attention to whatever game he’d been playing.
You sigh loudly, making Connie’s head turn in your direction. He pauses his game and turns his attention to you. “Qué pasa, baby?”
“Nothin, Con.” You yawned, sighing again as you set your wine glass on the table before you. “Just sleepy.”
“You gotta stop stayin’ up so late, baby. That shit fucks with your head eventually.” He scolds you (but not rlly). 
You snuggle up under the blanket on your sofa, moaning from the comfort. You don’t respond to his semi lecture, just allowing yourself to relax. It doesn’t last that long though and you’re interrupted by a knock at the door.
Grumbling curses and complaints, you shuffle to the door and open it. You look around but nobody’s outside. Instead, a box sits on your welcome mat. You grab the box and close your door. Flipping the lights on and making your way back to the sofa, you see Connie’s back on the game. You call him, putting the box in the camera.
“Connie, did you send this?”
He squinted his eyes at the box, his eyes widening immediately. He smiles and leans back into his chair, one hand combing through his hair while the other nurses a neatly rolled blunt.
“I bought that like two months ago. Was supposed to be for our anniversary, but it'll definitely come in handy for tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” You try to piece together his hints. You’d honestly forgotten all about your flight the next morning.
He chuckled, taking another inhale from his blunt. “Don’t stress out about it, mama. You’ll find out tomorrow.”
“Yeah alright, Connie. Don’t make no promises that you can’t keep.”
He scoffed, ashing his blunt in the tray. “What exactly does that mean, baby?”
“The last time you were talking about some ‘tomorrow’ you passed out as soon as we got to the hotel. Talked allllat shit and spat all that game, just for me to not get no dick.”
“Ah, that’s what you’re worried about? Ne t'inquiète pas, bébé. Je te baiserai bien demain. You won’t even know what to do with yourself when I’m done with you.”
It was your turn to scoff this time, rolling your eyes. “Aight, if you say so. But when I have you begging for me tomorrow, I don’t wanna hear nothing.”
He laughed, mocking your words while you looked at him irritatingly through the camera. You took the gift box, wine, and your phone to your room to begin packing. Connie ended the call shortly after for a meeting. You took this time to listen to some music and pack your suitcase. The multiple glasses of wine had you feeling extremely relaxed. You’d find yourself distracted, singing along to whatever song was playing or dancing to the beat (or both). It took you two hours to thoroughly pack your suitcase, having to take many dance breaks and trying on multiple different outfits. 
Once you knew what you’d packed tightly into your suitcase was what you were taking, you grabbed the box cutter from your desk. Carefully, you slice through the thin tape over the box, setting it aside afterwards. You open the box slowly, your eyes widening as you look into it. Before your eyes was a somewhat elegant white lingerie set. It included the one piece lingerie and a silk robe to match. You picked it up out of the box, admiring the frilly pieces attached. Under the robe was a pair of heels to go along with the ensemble. Finally, you picked up a small pouch. You opened it, finding a note inside.
‘Feliz aniversario, mi corazón. Can’t wait to see u in this later. -Con’
You packed everything into a small bag, which matched with your suitcase. You’d finally finished packing. It was almost 11pm, so you decided to put your bags in front of the door for tomorrow. You placed a pair of sweats and a hoodie out for your airport outfit tomorrow. Finally, you turned off all the lights in your apartment, scheduled your alarm, and curled up under your blankets as you fell asleep to the soft murmuring of the tv.
Early the next morning you’re up an hour before your 4am alarm. You use this time to do some last minute arrangements to your luggage, fix your hair if necessary, and do a little makeup.
Your flight was at 6:45, so you needed to be out of the house by at least 5:30. You didn't leave until 6, meaning you’d have to speed to the airport and try your best to get through and on your plane. Luckily, you made your flight on time (only because of a delay) and took off safely. You sent a text to Connie before turning your phone on airplane mode before drifting to sleep.
You woke up to the flight attendant softly nudging you, letting you know you’d be landing shortly. You thank her and get yourself together. When the plane lands, you make your way to the baggage area. You text Connie, confirming your arrival before you grab your bags and head to the front to wait. As you made your way to sit in a nearby chair, you heard someone call your name. You looked to your left, then to your right, but you didn’t see anyone. You heard it again, but this time it was closer. You turn behind you to see Connie jogging towards you. Immediately, your bags are abandoned and you meet Connie, finally getting to feel his touch and inhale his scent after weeks of going without it.
Connie pulled away, kissing your temple before stepping back. “Damn ma, you look so good. Tu m'as manqué, bébé.”
“I missed you too, Con.”
“Your French is getting better I see.” He teased. You smacked his chest, walking to grab your bags. Connie tsk’s as he takes your bags and carries them himself. The gesture was just bare minimum behavior, but it still didn't keep the butterflies in your stomach from forming quickly.
When you stepped outside of the airport, you didn’t expect to see the night sky mixing with the near setting sun. When you asked Connie for the time, you didn’t expect to hear him say it was 4pm. You were still adjusting to the time adjustment so your brain was somewhat foggy. When you made it to his car, he opened the door for you first and allowed you to get comfortable before putting your bags in the trunk. When he gets in the car, he can't help but to lock the doors and kiss you. He missed you way more than you knew, but you knew that he’d do anything possible to make it up to you.
“Cooon, not here..” You whispered breathly in his ear. He just groans and pulls away from you.
He kissed you one more time, then turned on the car. The drive to his hotel was somewhat silent. You’d think he’d be more talkative because of how badly he missed you. Instead, he kept a firm grip on the steering wheel, only speaking a few times the whole ride. 
When you arrived at his hotel, he opened your door again. You fought with him to carry your duffel bag up to the room while he carried your suitcase and the room key. The hotel was beautiful to say the least. When you walked into the room, your heart fluttered and thumped in excitement. The room was dark except for the candles flickering. When you flipped the light switch, you inaudibly gasped. He had petals on the ground leading from the walkway to his bed, where a few boxes laid on top.
“Connie..you didn’t.” You felt tears brimming your eyes, looking up at him. He held your duffle bag, urging you to go inside. When you get inside, he closes the door behind you (and makes sure to hang the ‘Ne Pas Déranger!’ sign on the door handle).
You waited until he stood in front of you to open the biggest box (as he instructed). Inside was an assortment of toys and a set of handcuffs and a blindfold. You looked up at him with a ‘really?’ look. He simply shrugged.
“Don’t act like you don’t love when I use toys on you. Open the last one now, baby.”
You rolled your eyes, but picked up the box. You unwrapped it and looked at the small, black box. Hesitantly, you open it. Inside was the most beautiful ring you’d seen. When you went to look up at Connie, he’d already been kneeling in front of you. Your face scrunched up, trying your hardest not to cry as he holds one of your hands in both of his. He inhales, swallowing tears of his own. 
“Do you remember the day we met, baby? You were working at that coffee shop on campus.”
You giggled, wiping your tears with the back of your hand.
“Yeah, and you asked me some stupid ass question about-”
“How many grams of protein was in the bagel and the cream cheese you’d just given me.” He interrupted, laughing with you. “You gotta give me credit, baby, it was the only way I could think to talk to you. You were way outta my league.”
You scoffed. “Nah, you were out of my league. But you still got my number though..after waiting like two months.”
“Yeah, you’re a stubborn one.” He looked away from you for a second to collect himself. “But that’s what I love about you.”
“You know what you want, and you make it known that you’ll do whatever to get it. When you said we could be friends, you have no idea how excited I was. I made sure to text you every morning, between classes, and before bed. I knew you were busy, but I wanted you to know I was gonna be there for you always. When I broke up with my last girl, you were there for me. When your ex cheated on you I was there for you. Even though you stayed longer than I’d like, I still showed my support for you.”
“Through all that, I saw how much trust you put in me and how much you let me into your heart. Two years after we met I asked you to be my girlfriend. Of course you said no, because you’re so damn stubborn.”
“Connie you asked me to be your girlfriend in the Wendy’s drive thru, of course I was gonna say no.”
He held his heart as if he were hurt by your comment. “It wasn't even about allat. I loved you and I knew if I didn't at least try I wouldn't be able to live with myself.”
“But I eventually said yes, didn’t I?”
He nodded, kissing the back of your hand. “Si, you did. And now I’m asking you to be my wife.”
“In a hotel.”
He rolled his eyes. “Oui, but a hotel in France.”
“I’m joking, Con. I’ll marry you. Doesn’t matter where, when, or how. I love you.”
“And I love you, cariño.”
You handed him the box and watched as he slipped the ring on your finger. He stood to his feet, embracing you tightly. When he pulled away, he wiped the tears from your cheeks, sighing at your complaints of him ‘ruining your makeup’. 
“You think it’s ruined now? Just wait until I get you naked on this bed, mami.”
You roll your eyes, wrapping your arms around his neck. “You can’t not make a sex joke, can you? It hasn’t been 2 minutes since you proposed and you’ve already got sex on your mind.”
“It’s what I’m good at. Besides making you scream..”
“Connie..” You walked away from him, walking into the bathroom to touch up your makeup. He followed, letting his hands grab at your waist.
“Baby, can you grab that box out of my suitcase?”
“What b-oooh that box.”
He smirked at you through the mirror, leaving a kiss on your neck before walking away to rummage through your luggage. Through your peripheral vision, you could see Connie tossing article after article of clothing out of your suitcase and behind him onto the floor. You rolled your eyes, poking your head out of the door to scold him, but it was almost as if he felt you staring daggers into the back of his head as he muttered a quick ‘désolée’ before finding the box. He stood to his feet, walking back to you with a smile on his face. You give him a sarcastic smile back, pushing him out of the bathroom before shutting the door and locking it.
No longer than 10 seconds and he was already complaining on the other side of the door. 
“Mamiiiiii, do you really have to have the door closed and locked? Tu es si dramatique”
“I’m not dramatic, Con, you just can't control yourself.”
You rolled your eyes as he sighed dramatically on the other side of the door. You slipped into the lingerie set, not quite being able to reach behind to tie the string. Grabbing two towels, you wrap one around the top half of your body and one around the bottom, leaving only your back exposed. Unlocking the door, you open it to find Connie leaning against the doorframe. Sighing, you turn back around, facing away from him.
“I need you to tie the string.”
He tilted his head in confusion. “Why all the towels?”
“You can’t control yourself.”
He scoffed, taking both pieces of string in his hand to pull them and tie them tightly and properly. Turning you back around, he looked in your eyes, then down to your stomach, then back up to your eyes. You watched as he basically eye fucked you before closing the door again. Sitting on the lid of the toilet, you slip your feet into the clear heels he’d also gifted you, tightening the strap on both. Slowly, you stood up, walking over to the mirror to fluff your hair a little and adjust your breasts. Finally, you slipped on the robe, tying it around your waist. 
Flipping the switch, the bathroom quickly lost light. You took a deep breath, feeling your anxiety bubble up in your chest. 
“‘Kay, I’m coming out. Close your eyes, Connie.”
He giggles, covering his eyes with both palms. “They’re closed, baby. Amène ton cul sexy ici, bébé.”
You twisted the knob on the door, slowly opening it. You walk over to Connie, your heels announcing your every step as they knock on the floor. Connie knows when you’ve stopped walking. Not just because your heels stopped hitting against the floor, but he could smell you. Keeping his eyes closed, he removed both hands from his eyes, pulling you closer between his open legs. He smooths his cold hands over your body, groaning softly as he tugs at the silk fabric. You shudder at that, trying your hardest not to moan.
“You can open 'em now, Con.”
Quickly, his eyes shot open, taking in everything he saw before him. The sight of your hair pinned back, just to keep the strands from in your face, the way your tits sat up beautifully through the see-through silk robe you had on, your painted toes peeking through your heels. Everything made Connie insanely hard. He knew he should take his time, but it was hard seeing you so…nude, but not even nude. He brought his hands up to your waist, toying with the ribbon. Your silent whines let him know all he needed to. Slowly and calculated, he unties the ribbon, letting it fall. The robe opened up just enough for him to see your belly piercing in front of his face. Placing a soft kiss on your belly, he pulled the robe open, exposing the rest of your front. He could finally see those thighs on full display, wanting nothing more than to mark them up and make you cry. 
“Take it off, mami. Go ahead, don’t be shy. You was talkin’ all that shit yesterday, what happened?”
“Shut up, Connie.” You slipped your arms out of the robe, letting it drop to the floor behind you. Connie looked you up and down again, licking his lips seductively before turning you around. Roughly, he placed both palms on your hips, squeezing them enough to have you groaning. The sounds that left your mouth made him twitch in his pants. As much as he wanted to tease you, he was tired of waiting to have you. It was so much easier when you weren’t standing in front of him.
Quickly, Connie stood up from the bed, cupping your face in his hands. The way he towered over you made you feel so small…so submissive. Softly, he moved his hands from your face to your shoulders, softly pushing down on them. You quickly received the hint and got onto your knees, placing your hands on top of them. You watched intently and quietly as he slowly unbuckled his belt, removing it completely and tossing it on the bed behind you. When you reached up to unbutton his pants, he softly slapped your hands away.
“Almost forgot. Go ahead and grab those cuffs in that bag next to you.”
You reached into the bag, grabbing the matte black handcuffs and handing them over. Once you set them in his hand, Connie moved behind you, cuffing both of your wrists behind your back. Once he had you confirm the cuffs were tight, he moved back in front of you. He held a slight smirk, placing his hand on your head while he looked down on you. He lightly tapped the side of your face with his other hand, sighing heavily.
“You know what your safeword is, right?”
You nod. “It’s __.”
“And what’s my name for tonight? What are you gonna call me when I’m digging in it?”
“Daddy.”
“Or…?”
You bite your lip in concentration, fingers fidgeting behind your back while he looked at you impatiently. His intense look made your eyes twinkle with realization.
“Papi…or sir, but you don’t really like sir like that Con, do you?” You ramble. He chuckles lightly, shaking his head.
“And in the event that you’ve got my dick or sum in your mouth, what do you do when you wanna stop?”
“Three taps, pinches, or slaps on whatever I can reach."
He didn’t respond, just nodded. Finally, he kisses your forehead, unbuttoning his pants. He keeps them at his waist, leaning down to whisper in your ear.
“I’m gonna beat that pussy up, baby. Gonna make you cum until you cry.”
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joyinunderland · 5 months ago
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Hi! I hope I’m not much of a bother but I would just like to ask for some help.
I’m a self-supporting college student and the money I earn is barely enough to pay rent and feed myself. I need to undergo a surgical tooth extraction due to a tooth stuck in my gums. I also need a checkup with a gynecologist because i have not had my period in months and ive been experiencing pelvic pain.
I don’t know where else to ask so I’m trying my luck here. So I would like to ask if you would kindly help directly or reblog my donation post pinned in my profile and also linked here ( https://www.tumblr.com/loversdoom/746650792037072896/help-me-get-costly-dental-procedure-and-an-ob )?
Thank you so much and have a great day!
Of course, let’s get you some visibility!
Also, for anyone who’s wondering, she has posted this:
“im not a scam and i won’t force you to reblog my post or give me money. i understand how it may come off as off putting that im asking help from strangers but all you need to do is block me to get rid of me. no need to send me long winded messages about why you wont help me and why even if you had the money, you wouldn’t give it to me. it’s so degrading and isolating. so please be kind.”
I hope this can help you ♡
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princessb4mbi · 2 years ago
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MESSAGES I CAN’T SEND
꩜ tags black!reader, therapist!eren, college setting, age gap (reader in 20s, eren in 30s), power dynamic, not so protective sex? mentions of death [not proofread]
꩜ synopsis isn’t it obvious to hide your private life better? or was it not obvious when a video of you dry-humping a pillow was sent to your therapist.
@ word count 3.6k
story below the cut !!
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ever since you’ve lost your mother to old age, your mental health has spiraled downwards a little bit. you’ve had the privilege of knowing when she WOULD die and at-least died in a proper place rather than somewhere shitty, so that’s cheered your spirits up a little bit. she was your best friend though, and losing your best friend is painful. you went to her whenever you could, talked on the phone for hours, and slept in her bed every night as if you were still five years old. 
you weren’t the only one suffering though, your childhood friend sasha couldn’t stand watching you wither away. even though she did everything she could, she knew she was capable of oh so much. 
you weren’t the only one suffering though, your childhood friend sasha couldn’t stand watching you wither away. even though she did everything she could, she knew she was capable of oh so much. 
“do you want me to hook you up with my therapist? he’ll seriously help you clear all cloudy thoughts away y/n,” sasha says caressing your cheeks
you move your face away from her hand, “they aren’t cloudy thoughts sas, im just grieving my mother..” 
“i know baby, i know.. but i don’t want to grieve YOU if you die of a heartbreak. i want you to get better, physically and mentally.” sasha looks at me emphatically.
she pulls out her phone and scrolls through her contacts until stopping at a card called “dr.jaeger”. “listen, give him a call please. his prices are cheap and his place is nice. it’s not like those dull white offices with an ugly long chair and a monotone person.” 
you sighed, reluctantly agreeing to her copying and pasting the number to your phone. “okey, i gotta go now babe, but PROMISE me you’ll give him a call, he’ll help you, and if he doesn’t i’ll play for any of your bills ok?” sasha says packing up her stuff. she kisses your cheek before leaving the quiet study area, leaving you alone to your own thoughts. 
you stare at the contact card, pulling dr. jaeger’s name up on your laptop and scrolling through his website. sasha was right about one thing, his prices WERE cheap. about $65 an hour and he also had packages where two weeks of therapy would be about $350 in total.   
the prices however, weren’t enough to convince you fully, as your scroll down to see the reviews.  
“dr. jaeger saved me. after the loss of my wife, i never felt like so lonely, but my daughter told me about him and he’s helped me heal properly and not turn to anything crazy. he’s an amazing person with amazing talents as such a young age. 5 stars” 
ok.. that was something. not that you were going to invalidate them, but that seemed just.. fake. you decided to read another one.
“oh my gosh. no one would believe how amazing someone is at listening and understanding a person’s thoughts. dr. jaeger was nothing like those terrible therapists who make you pay $100 for an shitty hour call. oh how i wished i can say more, but the character limit is fu” 
you giggled at that one. maybe i should give him a call. with a deep breath, you called the number. 
“hello? my name is y/n, i’d like to speak to dr. jaeger please.” 
— 
it’s been about a month since you’ve scheduled a session with dr. jaeger, only having to wait that long due to “heavy traffic”. sasha is currently driving you to the building. 
“you know, i’m really proud of you for calling. i was scared you were going to stay depressed forever.” sasha says over her 80s radio playing. 
“let’s not get too happy yet, he could still be shit at his job..” you say cutting down any happy thoughts. 
“you’re STILL doubting him y/n? i get that some people are money hungry, but i promise you he’s not. if he was, do you think ME of all people would be recommending you to him? i mean c’mon, have some faith please.” 
“i’m sorry, i just nervous ok. my stomach is doing backflips at the moment.” 
“hey man, if you feel like farting, ill park somewhere and you can walk the rest of the way.”
you two pull up to the parking lot, fancy with a modern style front. the office itself if very modern and 2 floored. 
“k, i’m gonna drop you off here, call me when you’re done ok?” 
you walk out of sasha’s car, waving her goodbye while she drives away. you walk into the sleek office, with painting from what you the assume were from the last two centuries. 
the receptionist greets you with a nice smile “welcome, how may i help you today?” you give her your name. “ah i see, you right on time then, ill have this guard guide you to dr. jaeger’s office.” just then, a semi tall man with a black uniform from comes in-front of me. “right this way.” 
he leads me into the elevator, where he then leads me into a hallway with lots of rooms. there’s multiple therapists in this building, all with different ways. as i look through the glass windows, i see pet therapy, group therapy and even massage therapy. the guard finally stops at a door, with a name tag having “DR. JAEGER” on it. “here’s your room, have a nice day.” he says as he’s walking away. you give him a quick thank you and knock on the door. 
a deep “come in.” follows shortly after, and you enter the room. first impression of when you enter the room was that sasha was right. the room was anything from boring, and didn’t have white walls but instead had a mix of brown and auburn. there was lots of old-style decor too. a record player, cd’s and even the tv was kinda old. 
however you were greeted with the most shocking thing of all, dr. jaeger himself. he looked away from his papers, to look at you and gave you a warm smile. his visuals was… something you didn’t expect. most therapist are middle-aged men and women, that are sort-of not the most attractive. but that was ok, because they wanted to help you, not seduce you. dr. jaeger on the other hand was extremely beautiful. he has dark brown hair, put up in a semi-messy bun, the most luscious green eyes, and very kissable pink lips. 
i guess you were admiring his facial features for too long to notice dr. jaeger looking at you weirdly. “maybe un-responsive.” he mutters to himself, typing down on his laptop. upon hearing his words, you apologize and scurried to the seat in-front of him. 
“or not. . . my name is dr. jaeger, if you’ve haven’t gotten a chance to see on the door.” 
“i did, sorry for not responding earlier.” 
“it’s ok, its common for most genders to be shocked at how i look.” dr. jaeger said in a non-concerned voice. you were took aback a little by his comment, most genders to be shocked at how he looked? you were wondering if he was just annoyed at the common occurrence or just knew that he was an attractive man. “pushing that aside,” he sighed “sasha has told me a lot about you.” he says looking up at you. 
“she did?” you question.
“mhm, she cares for you ms….” he looks at the paper look for your last name. 
“y/l/n.” 
“ah, thank you. sasha cares for you ms. y/l/n. she talks about your recovery, and wants you to best happy for her.” he says maintaining eye contact. you can’t respond to such kindness. all you can do is nod your head and smile. 
“but as a therapist view-point, the death of a loved one is one of the hardest battle we have to overcome as a human being. no matter how emotionless a person may be, the death of anything else to them will always cause someone to break. that’s just how we are, we humans . . . after all.” he says empathically. 
“my job isn’t to make you forget your mother, or forget the pain you feel about her. you always feel pain lingering about her, and that’s ok. i’m just here to help you reduce that pain.” 
you were shocked. cheap prices, handsome therapist AND a good one at that? maybe it’s good to stay faithful after all. 
— 
it’s been about 3 weeks since you’ve had daily therapy sessions with mr. jaeger and he’s honestly been helping you a lot. you had different kinds of sessions, like walking around and even some pet therapy. today was for a usual one-on-one walk around the building beautiful outside landscape.
as you and dr. jaeger walk around, you wave to the other clients with their own therapists. “see how social you’ve gotten? when we first came here, you were begging to stay back inside due to all the people,” he jokes around. “now, you’re friendly with them. it’s good progress.” he smiles to himself. 
“it was only because of you, dr. jaeger. i don’t think i’d be the way i am without your help.” 
“ah. . . don’t flatter me too much. let’s sit right here yea?” he says pointing towards the swinging wood benches. “it’s beautiful outside, isn’t it ms. y/l/n?” he turns to look at you. 
“yea, it really is.” you turn back to stare at him. god, you can stare into his eyes for hours. it’s something that about that were so addicting, that you couldn’t look away if you wanted to. to break the silence, you decided to follow up with a cheeky comment. “say dr. jaeger, you really know how to keep a client.” he moves his head to the side, confused. “i like to believe that my clients stay with my due to how i help them and not my looks.” ah fuck. it was not received well at all, and you just profusely apologized to him. 
“but, if my looks did make people stay, that wouldn’t be all too bad huh,” he says giving a hearty laugh. “but tell me now, ms y/l/n. does my looks make you stay?” you were at a loss for words. one part of you wanted to say “fuck yes” while another part of you wanted to say “absolutely not”. and you of course went with the latter. 
“whatever your answer is, it doesn’t bother me either way. . . but it looks like our time is up ms. y/l/n.” you look down at your phone for the time. it was up after he exclaimed. the two of you head back to his office to pick you up your stuff. 
that night later, you were chilling in your bed, getting ready to dose off. you however, couldn’t sleep without thinking about a fantasy. it didn’t matter what type, other than it having to be something interesting. you close your eyes, your mind shifting to dr. jaeger, and the moments between you two that drove you insane. like that one time he wore a turtle neck, showing off his clothed six-pack abs. you imagined yourself touching them, feeling the rock-hardness of them. you open your eyes again, looking around the room. to be honest, you haven’t.. you know what, in a while and you thought it might be time to do it again. 
you move your bedsheets closer to the edge to give you more space. and moved all your pillows away except for one. you pulled your phone out and started to record. it might seem weird to other people, but you like to record yourself, in the time that you couldn’t find anything good on twitter or reddit. 
you start to rock your hips back n forth on the pillow, assuming it the body of a male. maybe it was dr. jaeger body you could’ve been assuming it off. either way, it turned you on, seeing how you started to move faster on your pillow. one of your hands grip the pillow, as the other hand massages your boob. you move faster, enjoying the friction your clit is getting between the pillow and your soaked panties. you close your eyes, imagining dr. jaeger guiding your body with his big, veiny hands. as you’re about to climax, you can’t help but subtly whimper his name. 
once you’ve finished, you end the video. while you’re cleaning up, sasha enters the room. “hey girlie, i was thinking of getting some drinks tomorrow night? wanna come?” she says exciting. “i would but i have a session with dr. jaeger tomorrow.” 
“boo, you’re boring.” 
“whatever, i’m going to the shower, so let me know if anything happens ok?” 
“yea yea boring y/n.” 
you go to the bathroom and take off your clothes, hopping inside the shower. you turn on the water, letting the lukewarm water hit your skin. you are alone with your thoughts until sasha comes inside the bathroom. 
“not to be nosey, but dr. jaeger texted you.” she says. 
“mhm really? what did he say?” 
“i didn’t look at it properly, but something about a daily wellness video?” you knew right away. dr. jaeger usual makes his clients make videos of themselves with positive affirmations, then with their consent, he’ll use it on his website for future clientele. 
“ahh ok! just send him the most recent video.” you photo gallery takes forever to update, so there’s a chance it’ll take forever to show the video of your “naughty time”. 
“ok, sending right now… and it’s sent. if he wants a further conversation, i’ll let you know.” 
“thanks sash.” 
as you walk out the steamy bathroom, and get ready for bed, you check your notifications for any new ones. you go into the chat between you and dr. jaeger, seeing if theres anything new. you took a look at the video of your affirmation, seeing the shirt you wore today as the thumbnail. you clicked on it, expecting your face to zoom out, as you were testing the camera quality always. to your shock, you camera didn’t zoom out. but instead was your body moving back and forth on something. your heart dropped. it couldn’t be. you’re praying it wasn’t. you skip some of the video to see if it was truly what you think it was, but the video suddenly changed to a more in-depth shot of you humping the pillow with your panties being in view. 
your heart start to beat faster than usual. you click off the video to delete it right away. dr. jaeger didn’t respond to it, and it said it was ‘delivered.’ you wanted to tell yourself that he hasn’t seen it, and probably watches those videos early in the morning. you weren’t going to stress yourself out though, you were just gonna go to his office per usual, and get counseling per usual.
— 
you take a deep breath and knock at his door, hoping it all ends well. you hear his “come in” but it sounds different from before. his voice went an octave lower. you walk into the room, seeing a more “messy” side of dr. jaeger. at-least he didn’t look at cleaned up as he usually does. his bun was a lot more frizzy from before and he had two buttons undone on his button up shirt. 
maybe he had a rough morning. you think to yourself. “good morning ms. y/l/n. how was your night?” you stopped for a second. such a simple question was something so dangerous to you. “it was fine, dr. jaeger. how about yours?” 
“oh. one of the best i’ve had in a while.” 
“ah. mine was the worst i’ve had in a while.” you mumbled. 
“really? i would’ve assumed you’ve had a very nice night ms. y/l/n.” 
you stare at him confused. what could he mean by that? yea, you fixed your hair a little better than usual, and your eye bags have gone away overtime, but you truly did have a sleepless night yesterday. dr. jaeger gets up from his chair, to lean on his desk, standing in-front of you. he stared down at you with his usually lighter colored eyes now displayed a dark-green. and his pupils were more extended. 
“i don’t know what gives you the impression that i’ve had a nice night dr. jaeger.” 
he bends to to match the height of the chair, and put both of his hands on the rest, restricting me from mounting off of it easily. “let’s cut the crap, y/n. i saw what you sent me.” at this moment, it felt like 100 daggers were suddenly lodged into your chest. 
“i wondered why you asked what you did yesterday. i thought to myself ‘maybe she thought i was attractive’, but i see it was more than that i see,” he says not breaking eye contact. “you see, as a human, we see something we like, and have many kinds of thoughts about it. and i see the thoughts you have towards me are stronger than what i expected.” 
“i’m truly sorry dr. jaeg-“ 
“call me eren, seeing as that is what you called me in the video.” 
“i’m sorry eren, truly. i don’t want to do anything to make you uncomfortable or hurt this relationship between us.” i say holding back my tears. 
“hurt? uncomfortable? those words are out of the park right now,” he says standing up. “to be honest, tell me why you came today y/n.” 
“to have a therapy session with you.” you meekly say.
“is my looks standing in the way of you healing with the death of your mother?” he says standing behind me. 
“not at all, dr. jae- eren.” 
“so then what provoked you to send me a five minute long video of you fucking yourself to a pillow in the imagination that it’s me?” you were at a loss for words. he was right. your heart sank as his word dug deeper into you. and you couldn’t hold back your tears anymore. you started to quietly sob, feeling large hands down your shoulders. you feel a hot breath near your eyes chill down your spine. “don’t cry, not in this manner at least,” he says in your ear. 
“cry because you can’t handle it, y/n.” 
you stopped and turned to look at him. he had a devilish grin on his face. “handle what?” you say, not catching his gist. 
“you’ll find out soon enough.”
eren lifts you up by the arm and spins you around to face him completely. you didn’t know what was going on, but you didn’t want to push away. your faces was a mere 4 inches away from each other. “can i? y/n. . . can i give you what you want?” 
you look at his eyes then his lips then his eyes again. fuck it, you nod your head and eren kisses you passionately. he stops kissing you for a moment to push the chairs aside. you look at his desk to see his usually messy papers cleaned up to the side. he planned this probably . . . eren picks you up and places you on his desk. 
he places a hand on your chin, rubbing it gently. “open it baby,” he says as his kisses you again, but placing his tongue all over the inside of your mouth. his hands tug on the bottom of your shirt, signaling for it to be removed. in between each kiss, you both take off a piece of clothing until you up to your undergarments. eren slips his large hand under your breast, fondling with it while he leaves wet hickeys on your neck. with the other hand he unclasps the bra, throwing it the ground. he kisses you again, muttering “nice tits”.
you pull at the band of his underwear, “want you in me ren’.” you whine. “patience baby.” eren says sliding your panties off to the floor. 
“are you on any pills by any chance?”, he says rubbing ur slick all over your cunt. “m-mhm ren.’”
“good. so i don’t have to hold back.” 
eren slips his underwear off, revealing his long, veiny and girthy dick. you want to guess it’s around 6-7 inches, but it was gonna tear you up regardless. he strokes his dick, ‘lubing’ it up with his pre-cum. he inches closer to you, having his dick and your hole just one insert away from each other. you open your legs wider and lay down on his desk, giving him more access to yourself. “didn’t even have to ask.” eren said.
he teases the tip of his dick on your clit. your whole body tingles in response, arching your back off the cold desk. “please ren’…” you beg, desperately wanting his dick buried into you. “please fuck me eren.” 
“as you wish.” with that, eren aligns himself with your entrance, slowly pushing himself in. the both of you moan simultaneously from the pleasure you both felt. eren starts to push his hips back and forth into you, keeping a firm grip on your waist. eren keeps a nice pace, making sure to satisfy both sides. suddenly, eren lifts your legs, wrapping them around his waist. you jolted from the tingle he gave you. you were trying to conceal your moans, but every time it was getting louder than usual, eren made sure put his hand over your mouth.
eren’s pace starts to unstable, moving fast at times and then slowing down to grind himself on you. you can tell he was close to his climax, seeing how desperate and shaky thrusts were. 
“‘m so close baby. . .” he grunts. 
“‘ren please! mhm.” you whine, begging him to release. 
“at the same time? what a good girl..” he barely breathes out. 
eren picks you up by the waist to pull you closer to him. there wasn’t enough space between you too, but he didn’t care. eren grinds his dick into you, feeling his dick throb in your walls. then, you feel a warm liquid pour inside of you, while at the same time cry out from your orgasm. 
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rad2025 · 3 months ago
Text
Politics = Poly (many) + ticks (blood sucking insects)
Why?
I still don’t understand. I have spent a good amount of my past 43 years trying to understand why people think as they do. Im not a psychologist, nor do i have plans to be one. However, i have many intelligent friends that honestly seem to believe the DJT may well be the best president ever.
i have spent more than a little time considering this possibility. Let us consider some subjective research.
1. DJT was in the news repeatedly in the 1980s and 1990s for not paying his workers/contractors/filing for bankruptcy protection.
2. DJT wrote a book that i enjoyed, The Art of the Deal. He discussed his numerous purchases of NYC real estate when others were not buying, but selling somewhat low, and creating buzz about luxurious properties in order to ultimately gain a profit.
3. I enjoyed the first wildly successful season of The Apprentice on TV. So much so, that I interviewed for the second season in Seattle, WA.
4. Atlantic City, for better or for worse, was recreated by DJT.
5. DJT has had, prior to 2016, a lot to say about then current leadership of US Government.
6. DJT seems to enjoy coal, fossil fuels, and non-environmental friendly energy production in order to further increase oil and gas industry profits.
7. Revenge appears to be DJTs language of late. 8. I enjoyed reading Dr. Mary Trump’s book, Too Much, and Never Enough, about her Uncle. In summary, DJT Seems a Narcissist, and lies whenever possible to get ahead.
9. I have watched several PBS Frontline episodes about DJT’s time in office, and his fruitless and inaccurate allegations of voter fraud.
10. After obtaining my dual major in Business and Economics from a well known SUNY college, my Series 7, 66, Life and Health insurance licenses, Certified Financial Planner Designation, CEPA designation, and being the president of multiple for profit and non-profit, entities i feel i am in a decent position to honestly evaluate DJT’s business, financial and leadership qualities. He appears to have exceptionally few skills in 2024:
1. Bullheadedness
2. Unwavering convictions that he is always right.
3. Excellent presenter/public speaker.
4. Incredible persistence
5. Disinterest in others problems if he can claw above them to advance his agenda.
This begs the question: What’s to like here? That he is a Republican? Dont most republicans believe in the rule of law and the constitution? He certainly doesnt. Fake news, fake courts, fake allegations, fake ballots, nothing seems real to DJT. 11. He has been convicted in multiple courts for sexual misconduct, paying a pornography actress hush money to prevent political backlash prior to the 2016 election, and much more.
12. He sided with Putin instead of the CIA, in public, regarding allegations of voter interference.
13. He failed at many business ventures over and over again.
14. Without Fred Trump’s incredible success's in real estate, political influence, and business savvy, DJT would have been dead in the water decades ago.
WHY DO PEOPLE STILL WANT TO VOTE FOR DJT???????????????????????
Ps. First time Tumblr user/post ever here.
#djt
#politics
#democracy
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we-are-inevitable · 1 year ago
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from the burdened prompt list: “i know it’s selfish.  but i wish someone would just take care of me.”
davey struggling, having to work longer hours bc his family needs more money this month and jack finds him and davey accidentally lets this hidden “selfish” desire slip out
respectfully y’all are SO jacphobic if you don’t leave a comment on ao3 for this one (im joking (a little))
i hope you guys like this one !!
————
For the Jacobs boys, nights at the lodging house are a rare treat.
They always start the same. One of the boys at the lodge would tell Les about a game they were playing, or an event that everyone was chipping in on. A birthday, most often; birthdays at the lodge were apparently a big deal, since it was the one joy some of these kids might have. The boys who could afford to would offer up a few pennies to buy something nice. A dime novel, maybe, for the boys who liked to read, but usually the gift would be as much candy as a few quarters could buy.
Les, ever the social butterfly, loves being a part of these nights, and always tells their parents at the dinner table. Esther usually allows him to donate a penny or two, especially if this birthday was for one of the littles or a boy around his age. It wasn’t always like this, of course; the first time Les asked to stay the night, it took a long discussion before Esther and Mayer agreed, and they only agreed if David would stay, too. It was a little easier to convince them the second time, and again for the third, and fourth, and fifth, and now the boys don’t even have to ask: if they have a free night with no work at home to be done, they can go, but only if Esther and Mayer know ahead of time.
Once Mayer is cleared to go back to work, though, nights like those are few and far between.
As promised, as soon as their father finds a new job that will be easier on his health, Les and David are back in the classroom, learning literature and arithmetic as though their summer hadn’t been taken over by the strike. David had considered it a miracle, and Les had dreaded it since the start, but school was in session and David finally had structure back in his life.
That was what was missing, right? Structure. A clear plan. No roadblocks, no mishaps— a guidebook to the rest of his life, one he had made up when he was far too young to worry about such things. To David, school is structure. School leads to college, and college leads to a career, and a career means that David can provide for his parents, and his eventual family, and he will never have to worry about not doing enough or not being good enough because he will be enough and things will work out in his favor.
School is structure, and structure is uninterrupted, until it is.
When Esther pulls David aside one morning before he’s supposed to walk to school, David feels his stomach drop. “David,” she starts, her voice ever soft, calm, “Dear, your father and I have been thinking.”
“About?”
“Your schooling. We know how important education is to you, but, darling… You’re a smart young man, so I’m going to be honest with you. With your father’s new job, we’re still struggling to make ends meet. It doesn’t pay as much as his old job, and—“
“Do you need me to stop going to school? So I can work?”
“Oh, dear, we would never ask that of you,” She assures him, gently cupping his cheeks. “You have a brilliant mind, son. You are going to do amazing things one day, I’m sure… I want you to understand that we- your father and I- hate asking this, but,” She pauses, and David can see her frown pinch like she’s in pain, like asking this is hurting her. David hates seeing this expression on his mother. She closes her eyes for a moment, then meets his gaze with a sad smile. “Would it be possible for you to go to school, then sell the evening edition? Just until we can get back on our feet?”
Against his better judgement, David says yes without even thinking it over.
His family needs him. He can manage this. He’ll still be in school, and he’ll be making money, and it doesn’t matter that he already comes home from school dead on his feet because he’s so tired, because this time he’s helping his family and doing something for himself to make something of himself, and isn’t that the point of all of this?
Besides, it works.
It works for three weeks, at least. For three weeks, Does it, no problem. He goes to school and rushes through work so there’s less to do at home, and he’s still getting good marks on most of his assignments. Once school is done, he walks Les to the halfway point between the tenement house and the lodging house, tells him to take his bookbag and put it next to the door, and to give Ima and Aba a big hug for him. He watches Les walk for about a minute or so, just to make sure he’s okay, and when Les rounds the corner of the block, David takes off like a shot to get to the lodge in time.
That’s his every-day for three weeks. He doesn’t make much money only selling one edition, but he’s helping- he can see that he is. His parents aren’t as stressed anymore, and he’s still getting an education and holding down a job, and surely that means something, even if he comes home from work late and misses dinner with his family often and rarely ever talks anymore because he heads right to bed after eating.
Three weeks, and Esther finally sits him down one Friday morning before school.
“David,” she says softly. “Why don’t you stay at the lodge tonight?”
David it’s his head, brows pinching together. “You’re sure?”
Esther nods, and squeezes his hand, something she’s done since he was a child. “I don’t want you having to worry about walking home so late, darling. Besides, you don’t have any school tomorrow, and you haven’t stayed over in a long time— I insist, really. Have some fun with your friends.”
“…Okay,” David says after a moment, nodding. “Okay, I can do that. I won’t have to get up so early for the morning paper tomorrow.”
“Skip it,” Esther say, and runs a hand through David’s hair. “Take a weekend off, baby. Please?”
“But—“
“But nothing,” She interrupts. She has that look on her face: a mother’s look of concern, one that says she knows he’s overworking himself, but it’s not like he can just stop now. “You’ve been such a big help, dear, but you’re still a kid. Have fun, and be with your friends. Don’t worry about work.”
And David knows she’s right. She almost took it back, saying that David could work and go to school, after the first week— David was the one who said that he was fine, that he’d keep it up until winter and see where they were financially. If they were well off, he would stop working after the winter holidays. If not, he would continue. Mayer had said it was a good idea. Good work ethic, his boy; that’s what Mayer brags about to coworkers, and that’s the praise that David keeps square in his chest. Good work ethic.
Good work ethic.
That being said, David is appreciative of being given the weekend to be a teenager again. Everyone has been asking when he’s going to stay over again, and he hasn’t had an answer for them, but now he’ll be able to have a good night again.
The evening headline is a good one, too. Something about some bigshot in Brooklyn being killed. David knows that Spot Conlon and her girls are going to have a field day with this one, that’s for sure, but David is just happy that it was a big enough of a deal to make Manhattan’s news too. The papes sell fast, and David gets to the lodge even faster. Walking through the doors, he’s immediately met with the familiar chaos, and it brings a smile to his face.
“Dave!”
The voice comes from his left, and before he’s able to turn, he’s wrapped in a hug by Racetrack. It only lasts a few seconds, but David laughs and rolls his eyes as Race shoves him almost immediately after.
“Where’ve you been?” Race says with a grin, raising a brow. “You ain’t been here in ages.”
“I just spoke to you an hour ago,” David reminds him. He had seen Race walking back to the lodging house while he was selling. From the looks of it, Race had been walking back from Brooklyn, so odds are that he had been selling across the bridge all day. “I’ve been busy with school, but I’m stayin’ here over the weekend.”
Race nods his head, that signature mischievous smirk reappearing on his face. “Ya don’t say,” He says, teasingly. “Y’know, Dave, Jack’s been throwin’ fits without you bein’ around here so often. You should go talk to him. Does he know you’re stayin’?”
“Not yet,” David replies, shaking his head. “Is he okay? Have I missed something?”
“Oh, no, he’s fine,” Race says quickly. He pulls his cigar out of his shirt pocket, then the lighter from his pants pocket; he offers them up to David, but David shakes his head again and Race nods to himself. “He’s just been missin’ you, I think. He ain’t ever gonna admit it, but…” He trails off, giving David a knowing look, and, yeah, okay.
Okay, maybe Jack and David have a thing going on. There’s nothing really there, not yet, but the chemistry is undeniable; David had at first assumed he was making it all up— he’s never really understood this romance thing— but then Race pointed it out one day, and since then, David has gone to him for every burning Jack Kelly issue his mind could think up. How he wants to kiss him, but he’s never kissed anyone, but Jack has kissed a lot of people so what if David isn’t anything special? Or how it’s unfair that Jack can look so good in nice, tailored clothes, since he has that big job at the World now, you know, so he has to look nice and it kind of drives David mad, and how—…
And how David hasn’t really been here in weeks. And how David has only been selling, then heading home immediately after selling his last paper. And how he can’t remember the last time he had a good conversation with Jack, who should probably hate him by now.
David takes a deep breath. “Where is he?”
Not even five minutes later, his hands land on the last rung of the ladder to the rooftop, and Jack Kelly is there in all his glory: laying on his back, basking in the August sun. Once David has both feet solidly on the roof, he sees Jack’s eyebrow quirk up, though his eyes never open. “Crutch? You good?”
David clears his throat. “Uh— Yeah, but I’m not Crutchie.”
Instantly, Jack sits up, eyes flying open. His look is nothing short of delighted, and he grunts as he pushes himself up to his feet. “Davey! What’re you doin’ here?”
An oddly chipper reaction, considering they haven’t actually talked in a while. Back over the summer, David and Jack were fast friends, and even faster… whatever they are now. They sold together nearly every day, played cards between editions, sat next to each other during every meal, talked for hours and hours on end without ever tiring. They were a package deal.
“I’m staying the night,” David says with a nervous smile, pushing down the thought of this is ruined and he hates me. “It’s been a while, so I figured I could come back for a bit, if that’s okay? I have enough to pay for a bunk, I just—“
“You’re kiddin’ me, right?” Jack asks, walking closer. “Dave, this might be one of the last nights we get on the rooftop ‘fore it gets too cold. You’re stayin’ up here, with me,” He says, and that smile— god, that smile— shines full force. “C’mon, sit down. How’s school been?”
David follows Jack’s lead, eventually sitting next to him on a pile of blankets near the outward corner of the roof. “It’s been alright,” David answers, leaning back and bracing himself on his palms. “I’m still no better in math, but grammar is kind of fun. My teacher thinks I’m ahead, though, whatever that means.”
“That’s good, though, right?” Jack nudges David gently with his elbow. “Means you can take it easy.”
“I guess,” David nods, and lets out a soft sigh. Taking the easy road, it’s never been David’s strong suit. He supposes Jack is right; he can take it a little easier in school and not push himself so hard, that way he can pace himself while selling. Maybe he wouldn’t be as tired then, but… “I don’t think so, though. I’d rather just get school over with so I can focus on working.”
Jack is quiet for a moment. David stares straight ahead, resting along the ledge behind him, until he feels Jack’s hand on his shoulder. “Dave,” He stares, tilting his head. “What’s goin’ on? I thought you loved school.”
“I mean, I do,” David says quickly, though he doesn’t meet Jack’s eyes. “I want to continue my education so I can be a- a doctor, or a business man, or something, but right now… My family needs me right now. If I go faster with school, then I can help them, and—“
“Is that really fair to you, though?”
The question stops David in his tracks. Is it? Not really, no, but then again, what is? If life was fair, his father wouldn’t have gotten hurt. If life was fair, his father wouldn’t even have been working in that damned place anyway, and instead he’d be rich and successful like he had always been working towards. If life as fair, David would be able to focus on school, and wouldn’t be mocked and ridiculed all day for working a job. David knows he’s better off than the rest of the newsies, but at school, it doesn’t feel like it. Most of David’s friends don’t even have to work a job. They get new shoes every year, too, instead of waiting until the old pair gets too small or falls apart. If they rip their clothing, they can mend it and make it look seamless, not patchy, or they just buy new clothing all together. David doesn’t have that luxury. Life isn’t that fair.
He takes a deep breath, then says: “No. It’s not.”
Jack nods. The silence between them is uncomfortable, but only until Jack gently slings his strong arm around David’s waist, pulling him closer. David sinks into his touch, letting himself relax, letting himself lose the rigid tension running along his spine.
“I wish I could help,” Jack says softly, and shifts, allowing David to lie back with his head against Jack’s chest. “But, hey… soon, you’ll be outta school, and you ain’t gonna have to worry about that anymore. Right?”
“Until I decide to go to university,” David amends, “but at this point, I don’t- I don’t know if I can afford to go. My teacher is telling me I should, but it’s going to cost $150… I don’t have that kind of money. None of us do. And- And maybe I could save it up, but not when all of my money is putting food on the table— I can’t just… focus on myself right now. I have a family to feed.”
Jack rubs circles against David’s hip with his thumb, and sighs. “You deserve the chance to focus on you, Davey…”
What breaks David’s heart is that he knows. He knows he does. But it’s not in the cards, not now. David stays silent for a long while, and Jack does too; they listen to the sounds of the city bustling beneath them, the boys’ laughter filtering out from an open window, music playing in the distance.
Neither of them say a word, until David sniffs, and wipes his eyes. “I- I know it’s selfish,” He starts, his voice barely above a whisper, “but I… I wish someone would just take care of me. I know that’s not- it doesn’t work like that. I know. I’m supposed to take care of everyone else, but it’s so fu-fucking hard to just… push myself to the side.” As he speaks, his voice catches, and the next thing he knows, he’s wrapped in both of Jack’s arms. Jack’s hand rubs his back, and David finally allows himself to let go. Not a sudden outburst, no; this is a gradual accumulation of tears until David’s shoulders shake, but he’s silent, because outbursts are unappealing and sadness should be polite.
Still, David finds Jack’s voice grounding him.
“I know, I know… Let it all out, Dave, you don’t gotta be strong right now. I’ve got you, I’ll take care of you… You’re safe to let it out.” And how Jack always knows exactly what to say, David will never know.
David will never know how Jack knows just how to hold him, just how to run his hands through his hair and just barely tug on the strands to reign him in. He’ll never know how Jack knows to kiss his temple, his forehead, his cheeks, all while squeezing his hand or wiping away his tears. He’ll never know how Jack knows that humming calms him down, whether it’s his mother’s Hebrew lullabies or the melody of one of Medda’s songs from the last show she put on.
What David does know, though, is that he’s safe, and he doesn’t have to shoulder the weight of the world. Not around Jack.
When David calms down, he’s still resting against Jack’s chest, letting out a few heaving sighs. “Thank you,” he whispers, tilting his head up to look Jack in the eyes. “I— I didn’t mean to cry, but… thank you.”
“You don’t gotta hide from me, Davey,” Jack murmurs back, tucking a strand of David’s hair behind his ears. “You don’t gotta explain yourself, either… When you’re here, my job is to take care of you, okay?”
“Jack, no—“
“I’m serious,” Jack cuts him off, raising a brow. “You got so much on your plate, and you know that. Right? … So let me help, wherever I can. I want to.”
David takes this in for a moment, before sighing softly and nodding. “Okay. I… I appreciate it.”
Jack smiles gently down at him. For a moment, they stare into each other’s eyes, and as soon as Jack cups David’s cheek, it’s all over. David leans up and Jack closes the gap, and the kiss is short, but sweet, and good, and right.
The weight of the world isn’t so heavy after that.
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safety-pin-punk · 1 year ago
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Hi!
I’m sort of still getting into punk and learning about everything. You’re blog has been really helpful with resources and everything. Plus your cool.
Okayyy, now my question. I’m a junior in high school and I want to go to college. Pursue further education and all of that stuff. Learn more about the world and critical thinking. But I don’t want to pay a ton of money to a bunch of old ivy dudes.
What’s the right direction to go in for this? Is college a good option if I want to learn? What schools are good places? Where do I learn more about this stuff?
Sorry if this is a lot. Thank you though!
Hey! Thank you for your kindness!!
First off, Im going to stress that you are a junior and you have PLENTY of time to think about this. So dont stress too much right now.
Secondly, I want to preface this with the simple fact of college isnt for everyone. There are SO many ways to survive and thrive in life without it. And thats okay, good even! That being said, this post is just gonna be me talking about college. Under the cut of course
OKAY! So, is college a good option if you want to learn? My answer is yes! I learned a lot at college, both inside and outside my classes. I learned a lot of life lessons, I met people from all over the country (and a few international students). And I learned how to challenge my own beliefs and try to see things from perspectives that I didnt even know could exist prior to college.
But Im sure you were referring to the educational aspect. And truth be told, this heavily depends on both your school and you. Some examples: My school had a phenomenal chemistry program. You couldnt walk out of that program without having learned things if you made it through. But my school also had a very poor fine arts program. And to be quite blunt, I often wondered why any art student chose to stay. But going even further, it depends a lot on the individual as well. I was admittedly not the best student. I wasnt that interested in lab or research compared to some of my classmates, nor did I apply myself as much. And the difference is clear to see when others could rattle off different solvents and what reactions would occur from memory and I would be sitting there dumbfounded.
Next question, what schools are good places? Again, that fully depends on what you want to go to school for. But I’ll tell you what I did and how I chose my school. When I was a junior in high school, I found a list of every 4 year university in my state (I knew I wanted to stay in state, but you can do this for wherever you want to go). I then went through and gave each school a ranking out of 5 (based on vibes, chemistry program, education program, cost, and surrounding area). Once I had it narrowed down to only a few schools, those were the ones I toured. And I chose where to send applications from there.
Though, I cant stress enough how beneficial community college can be. A lot of people get all their gen eds out of the way either before they enroll in a university or over summers. Doing this will save you money and time. Literally not a single person on a university campus would look down on you for this. If anything, they will praise you for being smart. I took a few classes over the summers between semesters just to get them out of the way (and also avoid certain professors).
Where to learn more? Google. Google schools near you. Google schools where you want to go. Google schools ranked nationally in xyz. Google affordable universities. Google universities that have good financial aid programs. Just google so many things. From there, spend time exploring university websites. Read about their community and their academic programs. See if they have virtual tours uploaded. Check out their student activity board social medias to see what it would be like to be there as a student. Sign up for tours. Do an overnight visit if you can!! Or even, just walk around the campus without a tour guide
Best of luck to you on your academic journey! Hope I was a little helpful here
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nerves-nebula · 1 year ago
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was wonderinv who to ask then saw ur poston art school and went . yo!
anyway can i ask hows art school? like . is it worth it?? whats the experience and everything like + do u regret ur decision to go there? (dont feel forced to answer any of these) (for context + incase it wasn’t obvious ive been wanting and thinking of going to one if ever given the chance)
Oh man, where to start. Well first of all some of the main reasons to go to art school are the resources and the connections.
If you wanna get into furniture for example, that’s a lot easier if you have access to a whole workshop with tons of different saws. I’ve learned to use three different book binders as well as done hand binding myself, which is great fun for me but idk how I’ll make money out of that.
The thing is that depending on your major/department, a lot of the stuff you do in art school you could theoretically do on your own as well. So if you think you have enough willpower to make your own schedule and find your own resources then I’d say do that, and work on building your portfolio so you can show it off if you ever get the chance. especially if you don’t really have the money for college (I’m incredibly lucky to have someone help me cuz otherwise I’d be screwed)
If I’m honest, I didn’t really want to go to college at the time of me applying. I was kind of interested in learning how to wrap cars, and I wanted to take a course in that, if you can believe it. but all of my parents kids have to go to college no matter what (as in my mom forced me to apply to college and then sent me off like “I can’t help you pay for college btw good luck!”) so it was inevitable that I was going to go to an art school. which is fine because i've also always kind of wanted to go to a school, i was just stressed about not being able to afford it haha.
THEN there's what kind of art school you're going to. I'm at one of the most prestigious fine arts schools in the USA, because though I got admitted to others, I couldn't afford to go to others. the one I'm at offered the most money, because they could afford to. Idk what I'm gonna do with this degree but im in graphic design rn so I'll probably do something in that field. and it helps that the name of my school is renowned.
but if you, say, want to get into animation you're probably going to NEED to go to an art school. even if you cant get into an animation school specifically, any art school at all is better than none when it comes to animation (I think, idk for sure i'm not interested in animation as a job. my friend is tho so maybe I'll ask him)
now, HOW is art school? WELL. I've heard this isn't uncommon, but the first year was literally actual torture. it was really really bad. it made me more suicidal than I'd been since I was 12 and it ALSO made me start cutting for the first time ever. but I survived it, and the second year was way better! (if still stressful) the first year is for where they try to kill you, and the second year is where they go "haha just kidding ok lets get into what you want to know" at least that's how it is at where I am.
DESPITE the pain, and despite how even now I'm anxious about going back, I don't regret it at all. I really like my classmates and I love my professors. I love a lot of the work I've done and the skills I've learned. I liked living on campus and being so close to all that Art Stuff, even if i was too tired all the time to ever go out to any of the events.
plus on a more personal level, anywhere is better than living with my parents. so even if it was hellish the first year, i'm at least happy that i got things done and i wasn't wasting away at home with my mom.
hope that answers all your questions :)
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