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alchemyfought · 1 month ago

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! * , (zendaya, thirty, cis woman, she / her) ! * , hey, did you see CARLY HODGINS unloading their boxes from the moving truck? i heard they are THIRTY years old and work as an EMPLOYEE at FULL MOON BOOK SHOP. they totally remind me of RISK by GRACIE ABRAMS, THE SMELL OF TURNING THE PAGES OF A BRAND NEW BOOK and FRESHLY PICKED FLOWERS FROM A GARDEN. they’ll probably hang out at 1924 BAKERY the most if you were looking for them.

𓂅 𐫱 ❛ regarding ; ꒰ basics ꒱

name : carly hodgins

age : thirty years old.

gender : cis woman

pronouns : she / her

height : five feet, ten inches.

tattoos : none.

piercings : ears.

sexuality : bisexual / biromantic.

relationship status : single.

faceclaim : zendaya.

𓂅 𐫱 ❛ regarding ; ꒰ history ꒱

birthday : februrary 18th, 1994.

zodiac sign : aquarius.

place of birth : sacramento, california

parents : richard hodgins ( father ) & estelle hodgins ( mother. )

siblings : none.

criminal record : none.

𓂅 𐫱 ❛ regarding ; ꒰ deeper dive ꒱

personality type : enfj.

temperament : sanguine.

alignment : true neutral.

personality traits : positive ; adaptable , altruistic , hospitable , lionhearted & voluble . negative ; gullible , idealistic , passive , solicitous & touchy.

mannerisms : constantly touches / plays with her hair, frequently plays with the rings she always wears on her fingers & often bites her lip when lost in thought ( which is an incredibly common occurrence )

educational background : graduated high school with a 4.0 gpa and graduated from william jessup university. majored in psychology, but found that it wasn't what she wanted as a permanent career, hence the reason she packed her bags and moved to wilma lane, where she's much more content working at the full moon bookshop.

notable skills / talents : incredibly gifted when it comes to reading others, she's very perceptive and definitely uses it to her advantage. she's also great with flower arrangements and an excellent cook.

phobias : clowns, heights & spiders.

pet peeves : people who stop walking in the middle of the grocery aisle and leave their carts blocking the path, people who do not return their carts to the return area & people who hold up lines in coffee shops by not knowing what they want right away.

hobbies : crocheting little animals , having movie nights with salty and sweet snacks, going to amusement parks to try new foods & watching rain fall while sipping hot chocolate.

dreams / desires : carly dreams of one day opening up her own cat sanctuary, as she's always loved them. she's not entirely sure how to go about it just yet, but she's trying to figure it out.

𓂅 𐫱 ❛ regarding ; ꒰ backstory / tidbits ꒱

carly hodgins is the daughter of two people who were genuinely so in love with one another. hence, she has a healthy concept of what love should be like, and is definitely a hopeless romantic through and through.

she's always been a passionate individual, someone who was heavily encouraged to pursue her dreams by her parents. she's never not known what it was like to have a support system.

carly has many interests, she's an adventurous and open individual, constantly trying to find something new to enjoy.

leaving sacramento was not easy for her, as she's still incredibly close to her parents and is constant communication with them. however, she knew she wanted to experience different things in life, so she decided to go on her bravest adventure yet by leaving home and seeing what the world has had to offer.

despite the example set by her parents, she's yet to find any sort of meaningful romance, though not for a lack of trying. she just has not been lucky in love, which she does find to be kind of frustrating.

she's a jack of all trades of sorts. she carries many interests, and while some have evolved, she's never swayed from her love of reading.

carly has a notorious sweet tooth, she blames it on the fact that she spent every other sunday baking with her mother while growing up. she's not one to turn down a sweet, and is always open to trying a new one.

so far, she's settled in decently well to life in wilma lane. she's doing things she's never done before, and is working on gaining new experiences for herself.

carly loves all things flowers, she plans to one day start her own garden. she gets herself new flowers every couple weeks and tends to them carefully.

she's a music lover, she is someone who appreciates the art behind music and loves to dance. she's incredibly carefree when she's listening to it, and just lives in the moment.

she's known to be a rather sensitive individual, she can easily get her feelings hurt even if it wasn't the intention behind someone's words. she has a huge heart and feels everything intensely, but she's trying to work on thickening her skin a little bit.

carly is the type of person who's kind to everyone, so she has no issues when it comes to making new friends. she's accepting of those around her and, while she might've abandoned her degree in psychology, she still utilizes it and does what she can to be there for others and help them when they need it most.

𓂅 𐫱 ❛ regarding ; ꒰ wanted connections ꒱

neighbor. i'd love for her to have a friendly relationship with her neighbor. perhaps they help one another out with little things and keep each other company on the days where they're both free and have nothing else to do with their time. maybe she bakes for them and they mow her lawn or something ? i think that'd be cute.

new friend. as she's always making friends, i think it'd be fun for her to have a new friend she's getting closer to and spending more time with. maybe they get coffee / drinks together a few times a week ?

a fellow baker. while she opted for working at the book store, she genuinely does love baking, so i think it'd be nice for her to be close to another baker who shares the same passion that she does. maybe they exchange ideas for holiday - themed sweets and try to come up with new and exciting recipes or designs together.

the first friend she made in town. this would be the first person she got closest to, perhaps they gave her the grand tour and they've just remained close since. this would likely be her main confidant and someone she spends a decent chunk of time with.

a small book club with like five other people ? ( 5 / 5 available ) they get together once a week on thursday evenings and discuss their current group novel over snacks and drinks. they're pretty tight - knit and enjoy each other's company.

best friend. perhaps her best friend from sacramento moved to wilma lane shortly after she did as they also wanted a fresh start ? she'd be thrilled to have them around. ( filled. sebastian. )

general acquaintances. ( 5 / 5 available ) people she's familiar with and friendly with, but doesn't know that well, so they can't technically call one another friends just yet.

book shop regulars. ( 2 / 2 available ) these are people who frequent the full moon book shop, so they're people she sees regularly. perhaps they strike up casual conversations and ask her for recommendations on the next books to read.

crush. ideally , this would be a slow burn dynamic of sorts where they take the time to get to know one another and form a great bond.

karaoke companion. someone she can always rely on to get on stage with her at the bar and sing their hearts out together. this person could be connected with her in any other sense as well, i just love the concept of two people thoroughly enjoying singing at the bar and not caring what anyone else thinks about it.

#𓂅 𐫱 ❛ answered ꒰ carly hodgins ꒱#𓂅 𐫱 ❛ starters ꒰ carly hodgins ꒱#𓂅 𐫱 ❛ mirror ꒰ carly hodgins ꒱#𓂅 𐫱 ❛ study ꒰ carly hodgins ꒱#𓂅 𐫱 ❛ prose ꒰ carly hodgins ꒱#wilma.intro

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sargewood · 7 months ago

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IM STARING SOOOO INTENTLY AT canon(ish?), logan loves benny and later sarah but feels like a homewrecker

ok this one i can already tell is going to be my legit baby so here's a few pieces of it so far <33 i'll probably decide later on down the road if benny comes back after he leaves or not but idk yet! i might make him and sarah logan's wags and let elias keep his job lol

“But this is our dream?” (Logan) “No, Logan, this is your dream. I want to be a father. I want to be a family with Sarah.” (Benny) Logan reels back like he's been smacked. “Oh. I get it. I'm not a part of this like I thought I was then.” (Logan) “Logan, I didn't mean it like that. You have to know I didn't mean it like that!” (Benny) “I thought this would be better, but it’s not.” (Benny) “We tried, right?” Logan curls in on himself, feels impossibly small. Just wants Benny to say this ever meant something, anything to him like it did Logan. “We did try.” (Benny) “I know we were waiting to see if it would get better once we made it to F1, but it’s just not getting better. I think we both have to admit that.” (Benny)

“This is hard, but I think you were right. You should go be a dad to Kobe and Nala, spend time with Sarah.” “I won’t stop you, but are you sure Logan?” Logan nods. “Yeah, I can’t keep taking you away from your family. It’s not fair.” “You’re my family too, Logan. Whatever happens, I need you to remember that, yeah?” Logan nods to appease Benny, but he knows that Benny’s just saying that to make this easier, to make Logan feel better about essentially firing his trainer. Knows that eventually communication will peter out to obligatory texts and that Logan has to find a way to cope with that and move on. He can’t keep doing this to Benny or Sarah. He can’t destroy their actual family.

Logan’s phone lights up with the name ‘Sarah ❤️’ and the picture that the three of them took on the beach in Miami in 2023. Logan has a feeling as to why she’s calling, but can’t let it go unanswered. He couldn’t do that to Sarah, so he takes a deep breath and unlocks his phone. “Hello?” “Hi, love.” “Hi, Sarah,” Logan says. “You want to tell me what’s going on?” She asks gently. And something inside Logan breaks. Suddenly he’s sobbing down the phone with shuddering gasps racking his body, unable to catch his breath. “Hey, hey. You’re fine, babes. I need you to breathe for me.” He’s fucking trying, but his body just won’t cooperate. Sarah can hear him struggling, and it breaks her heart. “Do you need me to do anything?” Sarah asks. “No,” Logan chokes out. “Will you just talk? About anything, I don’t care.”

fuck it i'll include the playlist for this one too, it's more infidelity/guilt vibes but there are a few repeats

you signed up for this (maisie peters)

the blue (gracie abrams)

is there something in the movies (samia)

i know it won’t work (gracie abrams)

aeroplane (greer)

the other woman (lana del rey)

triptych (samia)

picture you (chappell roan)

coffee (chappell roan)

why did you marry (nataly dawn)

i don’t sleep well (hello saferide)

i do (reneé rapp)

high infidelity (taylor swift)

right where you left me (taylor swift)

go home (lucius)

don’t tell my mom (reneé rapp)

the kids don’t wanna come home (declan mckenna)

the one that got away (katy perry)

as long as we’re together (the lemon twigs)

why didn’t you say that? (the lemon twigs)

pool (samia)

to me it was (samia)

orange show speedway (lizzy mcalpine)

reckless driving (lizzy mcalpine)

called you again (lizzy mcalpine)

just dumb enough to try (father john misty)

nobody sees me like you do (japanese breakfast's version)

everybody does (julien baker)

your father (the front bottoms)

when u love somebody (fruit bats)

tornado warnings (sabrina carpenter)

things i wish you said (sabrina carpenter)

talking to strangers (maisie peters)

tough act (maisie peters)

bad decisions (bastille)

good lesson (bastille)

make me cry (noah cyrus)

fell in love without you (motion city soundtrack)

rewind (goldspot)

where’s my love (SYML)

meant to stay hid (SYML)

bottom of the ocean (miley cyrus)

not like the movies (katy perry)

grow as we go (ben platt)

same boat (lizzy mcalpine)

illicit affairs (taylor swift)

if you leave (orchestral manoeuvres in the dark)

also probably half of lizzy mcalpine's new album will end up on this list as well because that entire album is about logan and benny

#ask #my writing #logan/benny #care #logan/benny/sarah

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heartpascal · 2 years ago

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i have done it 😎

LOCK IT WHEN YOU LEAVE

(reader)

• all eyes on me - bo burnham

"you say the ocean's rising like i give a shit,

you say the whole world's ending, honey, it already did,

you're not gonna slow it, heaven knows you tried."

• love in the dark - adele

"please, stay where you are,

don't come any closer,

don't try to change my mind,

i'm being cruel to be kind."

• empty space - james arthur

"and i won't hear it,

whenever anybody says your name,

and i won't feel it,

even when i'm bursting into flames."

• soon you'll get better - taylor swift

"you'll get better soon,

'cause you have to."

• set fire to the rain - adele

"'cause there's a side to you,

that i never knew, never knew,

all the things you'd say,

they were never true, never true."

• war of hearts - ruelle

"i can't help but love you,

even though i try not to."

• king - lauren aquilina

"you're alone,

you're on your own,

so what? have you gone blind?

have you forgotten what you have and what is yours?"

"you don't get what all this is about,

you're too wrapped up in your self-doubt,

you've got that young blood, set it free."

(joel)

• home - cavetown

"get a load of this monster,

he doesn't know how to communicate,

his mind is in a different place,

will everybody please give him a little bit of space?"

• slipping through my fingers - abba

"the feeling that i'm losing her forever,

and without really entering her world."

• the night we met - lord huron

"take me back to the night we met,

i don't know what i'm supposed to do,

haunted by the ghost of you."

• i'll be good - jaymes young

"i never meant to start a fire,

i never meant to make you bleed."

"for all of the light that i shut out,

for all of the innocent things that i doubt,

for all of the bruises i've caused and the tears,

for all of the things that i've done."

(eliie and reader confrontation)

• my goodbye - jorge rivera-herrans

"i just like you, why should i be surprised,

selfish and prideful and vain,

unlike you, everytime someone dies,

i'm left to deal with the strain."

"one day, you'll hear what i'm saying,

one day, you might understand,

one day, but not today."

(tess)

• wings - birdy

"we watch the day go by,

illuminates our skin,

it made me think of you."

• i miss you, i'm sorry - gracie abrams

"nothing happened in the way i wanted,

every corner of this house is haunted,

and i know you said that we're not talking,

but i miss you, i'm sorry."

HOWL YOU ARE KILLING ME HERE.

it’s not fair bc i’m the one emant to cause pain ehre NOT BE THE SUFFERER OF PAIN!!! also the way i was shocked, flabbergasted, bamboozled by the inclusion of tess??? MY HEART.

also idc i’m gonna say it ehre and link it to the part 3 anyway. THE READER AND ELLIE CONFRONTATION ONE IS SO SO GOOD. i’ve seen some people not happy with ellie for her reaction and i just want to say SHE IS VALID!!! READER IS VALID!!!

lets think of everything ellie went through on that journey after leaving jackson. she has been through SO much. and she gets back to jackson, to this actual town, to find the reader there. and the reader is angry? angry for being left in this slice of heaven? for missing out on events that ellie WISHES she could forget? she’s angry and she’s hurting and so is the reader and they’re not understanding each other. they’re not seeing the other’s side of the story.

the first lot of lyrics fit r’s perspective SO WELL in my view too, because to her, ellie hasn’t felt the pain of all those deaths before jackson like she has. especially with tess. it’s not the same. BUT THEN, they also fit so well for ellie, especially in the second half of their journey. I CANT CONTAIN MYSELF WITH THAT SPECIFIC CHOICE. ITS SO INCREDIBLY PERFECT.

#heartpascal says #howl <3 #SOBBING #all eyes on me for reader’s perspective too???? ITS TOO PERFECT.#ITS TOO GOOD #all of the ones for reader are SO SO APT #as always but i just feel especially passionate about the choices for this part #WAR OF HEARTS AND SOON YOULL GET BETTER???#THE LYRICS FIT TOO WELL AND JUST !!!!!!!!!#also you cannot add cavetown in here and expect me NOT to sob and cry #I AM A CAVETOWN LOVER!!!#HOWL YOU REALLY HAVE OUTDONE YOURSELF WITH THIS ONE #I CANT EVEN PUT INTO WORDS.

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angelguk · 3 years ago

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omg so i sent in an ask re angst jock jk n oc ! but then i also realized its highly possible these 2 break up at one point while in uni mostly bc of the "are we dating bc its convenient" kinda dilemma and then it just pushes them apart bc they think theyre losing theirselves while being in such a close relationship,,,cue save ur tears by theweeknd BUT i just know when they grow up a lil bit more, theyll end up together <3

here we go! (the beginning of the end....may be...)

didn’t include save your tears as the soundtrack but may haps for the follow-up :3

pairing: jock!jk and oc

warnings: angst, yes the break-up scene, jaykay being an ass (a very huge one motivated by his own insecurities and selfishness – translation: he’d rather break her heart and carry that weight than be the heartbroken one), chayoung is no longer Seed of Doubt but something else (still up for debate but she’s fairly nice here), not edited but hey atp that’s part of my branding (also i would like everyone to consider that oc is not the greatest gf ever like guys don’t hate jk alone!!)

soundtrack: bags, clairo + stay, gracie abrams + say you know, alina baraz

(titled — honeymoon fades)

Jeongguk’s contact name hasn’t lit up the screen of your phone for six days now and you haven’t seen his face for just as long. It’s weird to go from constant incessant communication to complete and utter radio silence. Not a single meme deposited in your Instagram inbox, no random notification from his Twitter. Just silence, quiet brewing silence.

It breaks two days later when Chayoung finds you coddled under your duvet, mouth stuffed with the saccharine sweetness of mint chocolate. (Jeongguk kept a stash of it at your place but who was around to eat it anymore apart from you?).

“And why do you look like you live in a dumpster?” She’d hummed, ripping open the curtains you’d involuntarily welded shut.

“Because that’s how I feel inside,” you’d retorted, pushing aside your laptop. The screen is stuck with an image of an idiotic character named Nabi kissing the spawn of Satan. You hope for her sake it works out. Chayoung had huffed at your response, fondly whacking your head with a stray pillow.

“Well get over that feeling cause we’re going out tonight.” A declaration, the fierceness in her feline eyes a warning that you’re not allowed to even think of saying no. That doesn’t mean you hadn’t tried – sorrowful eyes and pouted lips as you begged her to spare you. But Chayoung is a force of nature, one that could easily wreak havoc on your delicateness. And she does though, with a string of comments that propels you out of the miserable burrow you’d dug up.

“You’re killing everyone, you know?” She’d supplied, yanking open your closet. “You’re sulking, Jeongguk is shutting down. He’s said like five words since this whole...thing...you have going on.”

You couldn’t help but scoff at that, toying with the corner of the large grey shirt donned on your body. Jeongguk’s shirt. One of his favourites actually. You’d thought about stealing it after spying it on his obsessively neat laundry pile, but after seeing your wandering eyes he’d given it to you instead.

“He always does that,” you’d said after Chayoung had whipped her head in your direction, curved eyebrows perplexed. “I mean, shut down. It’s his emotional response to things that bother him. Complete detachment so it hurts less.”

She had just stared at you, a long meaningful look at left your skin prickled.

“Huh.”

“What do you mean ‘huh’?”

A measured step forward, her body weight sinking into the edge of your mattress a moment later. “I mean, you know him so well.”

“Of course I do he’s my best-friend,” you’d said, indignation coating your words

“No–No you're not getting me. You know him. You know he wouldn’t make the move to reconcile–”

“But he should!”

“You told him to go away! He’s trying to listen to you even though he’s hurting!”

And maybe that was it, that simple implication that you were causing him pain that had you pausing, reviewing the things you’d said to him – the things you’d felt.

“But,” a timid rebuttal, “I just–I just need him to show me that he cares.”

“He does,” Chayoung had returned. “So much. And he misses you. He’s probably just afraid that you don’t feel the same.”

“But I do! He knows this.”

“Does he?” A question in her eyes, one that you’re afraid you know the honest answer to.

You say things and never mean them, he had said, eyes hard.

That had hurt you but perhaps he was right, there are things you hadn’t told him, feelings you hadn’t truly expressed. And Jeongguk had always been good to you, so understanding and caring, trying to fill the places were you lacked. Wasn’t he the one who planned the majority of your dates? Remembered all the important milestones of your relationship while you contributed the bare minimum. You hadn’t even told Chayoung about the surprise he had planned for your one-year anniversary, the shame of your own choice hanging heavy over your head.

So that’s why you’re here, staring at the back of his head forlornly as the music drifts around you, flashing florescent lights bathing him a hazy glory. He hasn’t seen you yet (something you’re thankful for because oddly enough you feel sick to your stomach). It feels like you’re skating on thin ice, waiting for the impending crack to sound through your heart, ice water swallowing you whole immediately. Chayoung is the one who pushes you forward, gingerly plucking the idle drink from your hand, Jimin aiding her efforts with a soft smile your way.

It’s time for you to try the way Jeongguk has, put aside that bumbling ego that oversees your actions and adopt the humility he’s always granted you.

“Go,” she murmurs. “He misses you.”

And God you hope he does because you’ve missed him too.

Except the moment his honey eyes land on you you know he hasn’t.

“Jeongguk,” you mumble. Yoonoh is frozen beside him, concerned gaze flicking between your faces. Your own eyes are stuck on him, the shape of his nose, the curve of his lips, the subtle hint of the dimple in his cheeks.

You’ve missed him, and it slips from your heart and brims in your eyes, vision blurry as your blink those stray tears back inside.

“Hi,” you add, when his silence doesn’t break.

“I should probably go,” Yoonoh lets out, awkward words bumping into the wall of tension standing firm between you to. He settles a hand on Jeongguk’s shoulder, sending him a look that feels loaded. “See you guys later, right?”

You nod, finally noticing the lump clogging your throat. “Yeah, sure.” Jeongguk just hums, the edge of his cup caught between his lips. Yoonoh flees within seconds, leaving you to wade through this alone.

“I–I know you’re not happy with me right now, but please, can we just talk?” He blinks at you, it feels like a premonition. “Please?”

“Okay.” The simple word fills you, like a hollow you weren’t aware of finally found the cure needed.

“Okay,” a small smile on your lips. Jeongguk’s face is still unreadable. He guides you up and away from the deafening sound of the song bleeding from the speakers, into an empty room, the door closing behind him muting the music and giving way to the own pounding in your head. Nobody says anything for a second, both of you navigating this uncharted territory of animosity. Until Jeongguk sighs, melting into the bed at the centre of the room. You follow suit, allocating enough space between the two of you. You’ve ever had to do that before.

“You said you wanted to talk?” Jeongguk finally cuts through it, eyes unforgiving when he glances at you.

“I did! I do–Just Jeongguk,” you can’t help it drifting out. “I miss you.”

Nothing, not even a flicker in his eyes. He eyes shift to the floor instead. “Okay. I that what you wanted to say?”

“No–No not just that! I’ve missed you Jeongguk and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that i went off on you like that and I’m sorry I haven’t been the best towards you and I’m sorry that I’ve made you feel like I didn’t care about you–or made you feel like the things I said or did had no meaning behind them. Because they do–they do because I love you. I love you so so much and I’m sorry if I made it seem like otherwise.” You automatically extend out for him, hoping to grasp on his thing floating to fast away from you. Jeongguk shifts and you hand tumbles down to the empty space between you instead, halted by his hesitance.

His head drops into his palms a second later, a broken exhale leaving his lips. The motion cause the silver bracelet on his wrist to slip down the length of his arm. It jolts something in you. Jeongguk had given you a matching one but you’d ripped it off after the last argument and hadn’t considered putting it back on. But Jeongguk was still wearing his.

“Do you really?”

“What?” He’s staring at you know, doe eyes cloudy.

“Do you really love me?” There, that stupid evil vile question that you thought you had the answer to but the words vanish in your head the longer he looks at you.

“I do–what? What are you implying? Of course, I do.”

“Of course, you do,” Jeongguk echoes. His eyes turn to the window located over his shoulder. You can see his head working through something, and you’re suddenly terrified fingertips itching to wander through his curls and coax those thoughts from his head.

“Jeongguk? What the hell are you talking about? Talk to me, please.”

He sighs again, at it feels like your heart splinters. A sudden shake of his head and Jeongguk twists back to face you, a silent tear falling down his cheek.

“You don’t love me.”

“Wh–What are you talking about? I do! And how can you decide my feelings for me?”

“No. You don’t love me the way you think you do–the way you should.” It feels like he’s saying it to more than you, like he’s saying it to himself. “Maybe this the wrong choice to make. You know. Maybe we shouldn’t have done this.”

You shatter just like that, shards on the floor as you stare him, this person that you thought you knew. And maybe the feeling is mutual because Jeongguk is staring at you in a similar way, searching for the courage to say the words you know lie in his heart. Like a loaded cannon, waiting for the match to strike and leave you lying in pieces.

“I think we should break–"

“No,” you cut him off with an adamance that you didn’t know existed until right then. “No, you’re not gonna say that and we are not doing this.”

His eyes narrow then, jaw set. “This is not about ‘us’, I’m doing what’s right for me.”

“How is that right? Huh, Jeongguk? Don’t you care about this? Don’t you care about me?”

He looks away then, ignoring your questions, his throat stuck.

“Jeongguk...” You reach out again, and he allows it, shoulders sinking with the weight of your hand on them. “Don’t you care about me?”

Another heavy exhale, his eyes blinking hard. “I do. And that’s why this won’t work, not the way it should at least. I really think we should end this, or at least reconsider the reasons why we’re together. You say you love me–you say you always have but really–really think about it. About me and us and what we are. I’m sorry, I really am but I just can’t do this anymore.”

He rises then, your outstretched hand tumbling down to the empty space he’d left behind. You can’t move it, can’t breathe, your heart hurtling out of your chest and onto the ground where it lies, fragmented beyond repair and bleeding bare. You glance up through tears, watch him open his mouth and then it and look away.

“Do you mean it?” You finally ask, and his eyes snap to you. He knows what you’re saying. There’s a pause that stretches out for eternity, coloured by the sound of the ringing in your head.

“Maybe.” It cuts right through you, lodging itself deep with intent. And then you just have to nod, swallow the scream clawing at your throat. He murmurs one more apology before his feet carry him away, and you watch, forlorn as you burn his frame into your memory, as your whole world walks out the door.

#jungkook x reader #jungkook angst #au: jock!jaykay #i really abused the hyphen in this but oh well

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daryl-dixon-daydreams · 4 years ago

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Words: 6,949 Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader Reader pronouns: she/her Era: Alexandria Warnings: Language, violence, gore, discussions of death of a character, sexuality, nudity, typical TWD A/N: STUFF. IS. HAPPENING. This is part of a series! Find the previous parts on the Masterlist! Summary: After the losses suffered during the fight with the Saviors, the communities try to change directions after a couple of plans go awry.

Your name: submit What is this?

The dawn was red as you watched the sun break over the horizon from the guard platform at The Hilltop. With Daryl’s arms around you, you had managed to get some sleep, but you awoke early while it was still dark. You’d crept from the trailer and out into the cool air, forcing in deep lungfuls.

You were staring out over the peaceful morning. The cresting sun set dewdrops on the grass on fire. It was silent and still. It was surreal that the world was still turning despite the terrors of the day before, the losses, the grief.

Your detached musing was cut short by the sound of soft footsteps and you turned to see Daryl climbing the ladder up to the platform. He stepped off and gave you a long look. Of course he knew just where to find you. He thought you still looked dazed, the way you had when he’d found you alone, kneeling at Eric’s grave. You turned back to look again toward the rising sun and Daryl moved beside you, leaning on the wooden wall with his forearms, his blue eyes flitting over your face, looking at the warmth the sun was giving to your skin.

“Aaron is going to take Gracie,” you said suddenly. There was a rasp in your voice, some artifact of exhaustion, grief, tears.

Daryl nodded and turned his attention to a knot in the wood of the wall in front of him. He picked at it absently. “Thas good,” he rumbled.

You turned to look at him again and he saw the same desperation in your eyes. “Why did it have to be Eric?” Your eyes filled with glistening tears. “He was pure good. Like Aaron. He wasn’t a soldier. I should have made him stay in Alexandria. I should have—”

“He wanted to fight,” Daryl interrupted. “It was his choice. Just like it’s yours or mine. He wanted to fight for Aaron. And for you, and for Alexandria.”

The tears broke from your eyes and streamed down your cheeks and you hastily wiped them away, ignoring the sting as the salty water wet some of the cuts on your face, remnants from the car crash the day before.

“We headin’ back today?” Daryl asked.

You nodded. “Yeah. I think—I think I’ll drive Aaron and Gracie. He shouldn’t drive.”

“Should you?” Daryl asked gently.

You straightened up, chewing your bottom lip thoughtfully for a moment. “I’ll be fine.”

Daryl trusted your judgement. “Okay.” He moved a touch closer to you and wrapped his arm around you, his fingers resting lightly on the small of your back. Both of you kept your eyes fixed on the sunrise, needing the reassurance of the rising sun just as much as you needed each other. “Aaron’ll—he’ll be alright. With time.”

You looked back over at Daryl and nodded, though you didn’t look any less sad. “I know.” You clasped his face in both hands and he watched as your eyes closed. You leaned in and pressed your lips to his and Daryl kissed you back softly, smoothing his fingers into your hair, brushing it away from your face. When you pulled back, you managed to give him a small smile. He drew that out of you even in the worst times. “You’ll be careful? On your bike?”

He nudged his nose up in a nod. “I’ll stay right with ya. After yesterday, I ain’t splitting off from ya again. Especially now that we’ve hit ‘em hard. Negan and his assholes will be like goddamn cornered wasps.”

You sighed and leaned into him. Daryl draped his arm across your back and rested his hand on your hip. You were looking back out toward the pinkness of the sky, glowing with the still low sun. “I want him gone,” you said, and this time your tone was hard and sharp. “I want him dead for what he’s taken from all of us.”

Daryl chewed his bottom lip and nodded. “I know. So do I.” The archer sighed. “S’almost done. We’re in the home stretch.”

“Unless they get out of The Sanctuary,” you said, turning to looked at his handsome face, his blue eyes. “Unless the plan doesn’t work.”

Daryl shook his head. He wanted to ease your fears, but he had the same worries. “Even then. We’ll get him.”

_ _ _ _ _ _

You had to take a long route to get back to Alexandria, making sure no one was on your tail and avoiding the roads you and Rosita had wired up with explosives. Luckily, the trip was uneventful and you arrived home safely with no major issues. Once the gate was closed behind the car, you drove slowly to Aaron and Eric’s house, Daryl just behind you on his bike. You parked and shut off the engine, glancing in the rearview mirror at Aaron in the backseat. He was staring down at the little pink bundle in his arms—Gracie. You climbed out and pulled his door open. “Come on, Aaron. We’re home.”

He looked up in surprise, no concept of how much time had actually passed. You helped him out with Gracie still in his arms and gave him a perceptive look. “Go on inside. I’ll be right there,” you said.

Aaron simply gulped and nodded, heading through the garage, past Daryl, to the door that led into the house. Daryl glanced back at you after tossing the tarp over his bike. “How’s he doin’?” he asked.

You shrugged. “He didn’t say a word the whole drive,” you said, your brow furrowed in deep concern. “Listen, I think I’m gonna stay here with him and Gracie tonight. He might need some help.”

Daryl nudged his nose up in a nod, deeply appreciating how you could be both so badass and yet soft when the moment called for it. “Good idea. I’ll be down at the house checkin’ in with everybody if ya need me, alright?”

“Okay,” you said with a nod. You stared at him for a long moment, your forehead still creased with that little worry line you always got.

“C’mere,” Daryl said, reaching his arm around to pull you in toward him. “It’ll be alright. Aaron is a tough son of a bitch. And now he’s got that little girl to look after.”

You fell against him and breathed in his familiar smell. “I know. I just miss him. So, I can’t imagine how Aaron is feeling. It doesn’t even feel real yet.” Daryl planted a kiss in your hair and you glanced up at him and gave him a small smile before your face turned serious again. “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.”

“Me neither. But it ain’t happenin’.” Daryl gently lifted your chin and kissed you, slow and sweet. “I’ll come by in the mornin’ alright? See how you’re doin’.”

You nodded. “Night,” you said, letting your fingers slip from between his. He took a few steps away and then glanced back at you.

“S’gonna be weird not havin’ ya next to me sleepin’ tonight,” he commented. You nodded. “I’ll miss ya,” he drawled.

You smiled at him again. “Same. See you in the morning.”

You watched him fade down the street until you couldn’t distinguish him in the growing twilight. You stepped into the house and when you pushed inside, Aaron was standing just over the threshold, holding Gracie, and looking completely lost. “Aaron?” you said gently, touching him on the sleeve.

“Huh?” He turned and looked at you, dazed.

“Come on. Let’s get you in and sitting down with her, okay?” You led him by the elbow into the living room, averting your eyes from Eric’s boots sitting just inside the door and his sweatshirt tossed over the back of the couch.

Aaron sank down onto the couch, looking completely exhausted, but staring down at Gracie like she was the only thing on the earth. “Okay. Here we go.” You draped a blanket around Aaron’s shoulders. “I’m gonna go get her bag out of the car. Then I need to see about some more baby things for her. After that,” you sighed, “you need to eat something.”

Aaron nodded, which was more than you were even expecting. You rushed out to the car sitting at the curb and pulled the bag from the backseat. It had a few changes of clothes and diapers in it, along with some formula, but she would need more. She needed a crib, and more clothes and formula, and toys… You set the bag down next to Aaron. “I’m gonna go to the clinic and see what they have for her. Will you be okay here by yourself?”

He gulped and looked up at you. “Yeah. I’m okay. We’re okay…” he trailed off quietly.

You gave him one last parting glance before nodding and heading out to the clinic. You were able to get some more diapers and formula, bottles and even a few toys. You were still missing a crib for her and definitely would need more clothes, but it would be a good start for Aaron. You stopped by the pantry on the way back to pick up something to make for dinner, hoping you could convince Aaron to eat something.

As soon as you got back to Aaron’s, you set out some water to boil on the stove and later threw in some pasta. You got a bottle of formula ready for Gracie and brought it over to him, where he was still sitting frozen on the couch. “Here,” you said, handing it to him. “I’m sure she’s hungry.”

“Thanks,” Aaron said, taking the bottle and almost smiling. You leaned your chin on your hand, elbow propped up on the back of the couch as you watched him feeding Gracie. “Eric and I always talked about having kids but obviously in this world—” he broke off, looking suddenly desperate again, and you reached out and rested your hand gently on his arm, unable to stop tears from welling up in your own eyes.

Aaron gave you a grateful look. “Thank you for being here,” he said. His voice was a raspy whisper. “I didn’t know if I could come back here alone.”

You nodded. “Of course. And you’re not alone.”

_ _ _ _ _ _

Amazingly you had gotten Aaron to eat a small amount before he said he was going to sleep with Gracie in the spare bedroom. Going into his and Eric’s master bedroom would be too hard. You helped him set up an area with clean blankets for her on the floor and you gave him a tight hug goodnight. “I’ll be down on the couch if you need anything, okay?” He nodded and thanked you again and you headed downstairs and flopped down on the couch, pulling the blanket over you and tucking your knife in its sheath under one of the throw pillows. At first your mind wouldn’t quiet, and all you could think about was a never-ending string of what ifs. What if the Saviors showed up at the gate? What if Negan got out of The Sanctuary? What if they brought down the walls? What if you had missed some outposts? But surprisingly, exhaustion from the battles of the last few days, physical and emotional, got the best of you and eventually you sank into a deep sleep.

“You know what I want to hear from you?” Negan’s deep voice drifted over you and your whole body seemed to go numb, except that you could feel his breath on your neck. “I want to hear you beg me.” You could tell he was smiling.

You turned and met his eyes. “I’m not really the begging type. You know that.”

He chuckled to himself and then you felt his hands on your hips from behind, pulling you back against him. “Come on now, Y/N. Don’t be like that. You’re my wife, after all. Don’t you want to please your husband?”

You gulped as his fingers dug into your hips tighter.

His voice next came from right beside you ear. “Or did I make a mistake marrying you? If you’re unhappy with our little arrangement you only have to say so… But you know I wouldn’t be able to give you or your brother any special treatment. That wouldn’t be fair to—”

“No,” you said urgently, your chest heaving. “No. I’m not unhappy with our arrangement.”

You felt his lips and then his teeth on your earlobe. “That’s my girl. So… beg me. I want you to tell me exactly what you want me to do to you…”

“Y/N!”

You shot upright on the couch, absolutely drenched in a cold sweat and when you got your bearings you looked up and saw Aaron standing over you. Gracie was in his arms, crying at full volume. You wiped a shaky hand over your brow and threw the blanket off your lap. “Oh, God. I’m so sorry—I was—it was just a nightmare,” you said, saying it to yourself as much as you were to Aaron.

He was bouncing Gracie in his arms and looking at you with almost frantic worry. “You were yelling,” he said, fumbling in the nearby baby bag for a pacifier.

You squeezed your eyes shut but immediately opened them when a flashback of your dream immediately came forward. You could see Negan as if he was really right there in front of you. You could still feel his fingers digging into your hips and his breath on your neck. You blinked the sensations away and knelt down beside the baby bag, unzipping a side pocket where you had seen the pacifiers. You held one out to Aaron and Gracie immediately latched onto it and quieted. You leaned your back against the bottom of the couch and rubbed your hands over your face. “I’m sorry,” you said again. “This is the last thing you need. Me in your house freaking out over nothing in the middle of the night.”

“Stop,” Aaron said, still looking at you with concern. “There’s nothing to apologize for. Y/N, you have PTSD…”

You looked up at him in surprise. “I don’t think it’s—”

“It is,” he said gently, not stopping bouncing Gracie who seemed perfectly happy and content in his arms now.

You pulled your bottom lip in between your teeth and chewed it anxiously for a moment. You’d never thought about the lasting effects of your past in that context, but you had to admit that he was probably right. The flashbacks were vivid and there were certain sounds, certain smells that elicited completely involuntary terror in you. You pulled yourself up off the floor and sank back down on the edge of the couch letting out a long, slow breath. “Huh… Well, to be fair, doesn’t everyone have PTSD nowadays?”

Aaron gave you a sad look. “Are you okay?” You nodded.

“Yeah. I’m sorry. I didn’t think about this happening because—I haven’t had one in so long,” you said.

Aaron’s worry eased some and his furrowed brow relaxed. “Since Daryl?” he asked.

You caught his eyes a little sheepishly and nodded. “Yeah. Since Daryl pretty much.”

The next moment you could see the look in his eyes shrinking away, and you knew he was thinking about Eric. “I’m gonna go back to bed, okay?” he said gently. “You’re sure you’re alright?”

“I’m good.” You stood and peered down at Gracie, gently brushing a finger over her silky soft cheek. “Goodnight, you two,” you cooed.

_ _ _ _ _ _

The next morning there was a quiet knock on the front door and you went to answer it, Gracie nestled in your arms. It was Daryl. His heart skipped a beat at your little smile and the sight of you with that sweet bundle in your arms.

“Hey. Mornin’,” he said, stepping into the front entryway. “Aaron?” he asked, one of his eyebrows lifting in quizzically.

“He’s asleep, actually. And he deserves it,” you said, turning and leading the way quietly into the kitchen. “I, uhh… had a—nightmare last night. Or a… flashback. Woke him and Gracie up at some ungodly hour.”

Daryl’s hand went reflexively to your waist. “Are ya alright?”

You nodded. “Fine. It was…nothing.” Daryl looked a little unconvinced. You looked down at Gracie’s wide blue eyes. “I’m okay.”

He nodded. “Listen, I ain’t tryin’ to pile more on ya but… Rick ain’t back yet. We were expectin’ him by now.”

You gulped and looked up at Daryl, trying to read exactly how worried you should be based on his expression. “You think something went wrong with the scavengers?”

Daryl shrugged. “I dunno. All I know is I can’t stop worryin’ about those Saviors in The Sanctuary managing to get out, clear of the damn herd, and catchin’ us with our pants down.”

“Yeah… Same. But what can we do?”

It was then that Daryl told you his plan to crash a truck into the building and break the place open, letting the walkers get inside. He’d already talked it over with Rosita and Michonne and they both said they needed to see the place for themselves anyway.

“I just figure the longer we wait, the more time Negan has to figure somethin’ else out.”

You stared at him for a long moment. “Alright. Fine. I’m in. When are we going?”

He anxiously chewed his bottom lip. “Nah. Ya should stay here. If Rosita, Michonne, and I go, ya should stay and keep an eye on things.”

“You want me to stay here while you go back there? Close to Negan? Are you crazy?” you asked him.

“Y/N, listen to me. If shit goes sideways, ya should be here. Rick ain’t here. Who else is there? Besides, Aaron needs ya.”

Your jaw clenched and Daryl watched the muscle twitch. “I don’t do sidelines well,” you said.

For some reason this made him smile, despite the grim topic. “Ya, I know. It ain’t the sidelines. It just ain’t the frontline.”

You sighed and went to set Gracie down on a blanket spread on the floor. You considered the handsome archer again for a long moment before nodding. “Fine. But promise me you won’t get yourself killed. Don’t do anything too reckless without me.”

“I promise.” He moved close to you now and smoothed his hands over your sides before resting them on your hips. You ran your hands up his strong arms and brushed some of his hair away from his face.

“When are you going?”

He gulped. “In like an hour,” he said. He watched you carefully for your reaction but you simply sighed.

“Alright.” You arched up onto your tiptoes and kissed him, your arms looping around his neck. Daryl kissed you back hungrily and even lifted you off your feet for a brief moment, causing you to smile into his lips. When he pulled back you smoothed your hand down his chest. “I’ll see you later,” you said pointedly.

He nudged his nose up in a nod. “Yeah. Ya will.”

He kept his promise. And the plan sounded like it had worked. The truck had cracked open the front of the building and the herd had started to pour in. But now there was still more excruciating waiting, and worse yet, Rick still wasn’t back.

Aaron watched you endlessly pacing across his living room with a sleeping Gracie in your arms the next morning.

“Y/N.” You looked over at him. “I’ll take her. You go home. Go be with Daryl.”

Your brows contracted, leaving that little worry line in the middle of your forehead. “Are you sure? You’ll be okay?”

Aaron nodded. “Yeah. And it’s probably time I let myself really feel it. I’ll be okay.”

You gulped and wished you could banish the empty feeling between your lungs at his words, at the devastation on his face, but you couldn’t. You nodded and handed Gracie over to Aaron. “You know where I’ll be if you need me,” you said gently, smoothing your hand over her soft hair as she settled happily into Aaron’s arms.

“Yeah. I know.” You gave his shoulder a light squeeze and managed a small smile for him.

“Okay. I’ll check in with you tomorrow, okay?”

You left Aaron’s and headed straight for Daryl’s house, knocking lightly on the front door. Rosita pulled it open and greeted you, stepping back to let you inside. “Daryl’s downstairs,” she said. The mood was notably subdued in the house, obviously because everyone was worried about Rick… You were too.

“Daryl?” You called down the stairs.

“M’down here. C’mon down.”

You actually had never been down in his space before. Since you had an empty house, the two of you always stayed there. You moved into the dim space with interest, glancing around and seeing Daryl’s old poncho slung over a chair and a few collected odds and ends scattered around.

He was laying on his bed, drinking in the sight of you. Even in the low light he could see the bruises and flecked wounds on your face from when the Saviors had caused your vehicle to crash. Your eyes took in the space, eventually landing on something familiar he had on his nightstand. “Hey,” you said with a smile. “That’s what happened to this.” You grabbed the familiar scarf and ran the soft material through your fingers. “What’s this doing here?” you asked him curiously.

“Ya left it. That night after ya pushed me into the damn pond,” he drawled. You sank down onto the edge of the bed beside him.

“And you just decided not to give it back?” You teased him with a smile.

He shrugged vaguely. “Smells like ya,” he admitted. You gave him a fond look and replaced it where you had found it.

“You can keep it,” you said. “God, that feels like forever ago. To think I was just walking around, never having kissed you. What the hell was I doing?” you said.

“What the hell are ya doin’ now? Ya gonna lay down here properly with me or not?” he asked.

You laughed and immediately sunk down on top of him. His arms wrapped around you. “Hi,” you said softly.

“Hey.” He gave you a more serious look. “How’s Aaron doin’?”

“He’s—he’s okay. I think. He told me to come home.” Daryl nodded and chewed on his bottom lip. A look of worry seized him again. You smoothed your hand over his chest, your brow drawing low over your eyes. “You’re worrying about Rick,” you said. He nodded.

“Those scavengers… I dunno…” he trailed off. “Got a bad feelin’.”

“Rick is a tough son of a bitch,” you said. “I’m sure he’s fine.”

Daryl nudged his nose up in a nod. “Yeah. I ‘spose.” He gently moved his hands underneath your shirt so he could feel the softness of your skin. It sent goosebumps rising up your arms. “Ya gonna stay with me tonight?” he asked hopefully.

You nodded and ran your fingers through his hair. Daryl’s eyes closed at your touch. “If you’ll have me,” you said softly. The archer could hear a smile in your voice and was glad for it. Things had been so dark since Eric’s death.

He opened his eyes and blinked up at you. “Oh, I’ll have ya, alright,” he drawled, a mischievous look on his face. The next thing you knew he’d swung you over onto the bed and you were underneath him, laughing in surprise and then sighing as he kissed your neck.

You looped your arms around his neck and gave in happily, glad to disappear with him into a blissful bubble, even just for a short time.

_ _ _ _ _ _

Several days later

Still no Rick. And the group was gathered together trying to decide what to do. Everyone was in agreement that something had to be done, but the details were up for debate.

“Something is definitely wrong,” Michonne said. “I think it’s time we head there for ourselves.”

You straightened up from your place leaning against the kitchen island. “We can’t just all go. It’d leave Alexandria even weaker. And what about The Saviors?” You glanced at Daryl, shaking your head. “I think it’s time we do a little check-in, don’t you?”

Michonne sighed, but nodded. “Fine. Then I’ll go after Rick. Alone.”

“Michonne, that’s not what I’m saying,” you said sympathetically.

“I know. But you’re also right. There’s too much to deal with and too few of us. Someone should check-in with the other communities and we definitely need to figure out how much longer it’s going to be before Negan and his asshole starve to death in there. So, I’ll go alone. It’ll be quiet, too. It’ll be good.”

“Are you sure?” Rosita asked her, clearly worried. “I can come with you,” she said.

“I’m sure. I’ll leave now. Stay here and keep this place safe. I’ll bring him back,” Michonne said.

“Be careful,” you said, giving her a nod.

“Who’s going to pay The Sanctuary a little visit?” Rosita asked.

“I want to see it,” you said urgently. “I mean… I haven’t seen it since the fight. I just—I need to see it.” It still didn’t feel real.

Daryl gave you an understanding nod. “Alright. You and I will go. We’ll take my bike. See if there are any messages from Dwight. Rosita, get extra watches on the walls and make a radio call to Hilltop and The Kingdom.”

She nodded. “You got it.”

So, you set off to The Sanctuary, both nervous and feeling tense with anticipation. You were hoping that seeing the place all hemmed in by walkers would give you some sense of satisfaction, lift some of the angry weight on your shoulders, but you knew that was probably wishful thinking. That weight wouldn’t be gone, the flashbacks wouldn’t be gone, the anger and anxiety wouldn’t be gone until he was gone.

But as soon as the building had barely come into view, you knew something was very wrong. Your arms tightened around Daryl’s waist and he hurriedly pulled his bike into a hidden spot alongside a building. You stumbled getting off as fast as you could and immediately had your hand on your rifle, rushing to get to a spot where you could look through the scope. Daryl was hurrying to get his bow off his bike, frantically watching what you were doing.

He heard you murmuring to yourself as he arrived next to you at the vantage point. “No, no, no… No! No, that can’t be—Daryl, tell me that—”

He lifted his binoculars and peered at the building. He didn’t need to look long. His jaw dropped partially open and then he lowered the binoculars from his eyes. He glanced at you. Your face was contorted a little with a slew of emotions; disbelief, anger, confusion, surprise, fear… all of them blended into one shitty milkshake you felt like had just been poured down your throat. Daryl’s blue eyes were narrowed in a glare and you watched his jaw clench.

You raised the scope of your rifle to your eye again and stared at the stacks of walkers that had formed a protective barrier around the double doors. “This was fucking Eugene,” you growled, “This was Eugene.” You dropped the scope from you eye and Daryl was worried for a moment that you might actually collapse. You leaned heavily against the brick wall and sank down to the ground. “He’s out. He’s fucking out…”

Daryl gulped and took another look at the building. Was this his fault? Had crashing the truck in somehow made this possible? “Fuck,” he growled. He let out a few angry breaths and considered punching his fist into the wall, and maybe he would have if you weren’t there, reeling.

“Fuck!” you repeated, shutting your eyes and leaning your head back against the wall. “What the fuck do we do now?”

Daryl glanced down at you and shook his head. “We go home. And then we come up with a new plan.” He hesitated and anxiously chewed his bottom lip. “‘M sorry,” he said.

You looked up at him in surprise. “This isn’t your fault,” you said softly. “This is—this is fucking war. It’s just how it is…”

_ _ _ _ _ _

“He’s out there and we don’t fucking know where!” you yelled. “Listen to me, Daryl. If we don’t want him to hit us here then we have to make sure he’s somewhere else. And right now we have no clue where the fuck he is!”

“Yeah, no shit. How the hell we gonna do that, huh? Go out there? Thas suicide! We don’t know how many of them got out. Obviously, they’re still pretty well fuckin’ armed!” he growled back.

You sighed heavily, getting near to it now. “There are three people Negan is guaranteed to show up for. Rick, you, and me. Out of those three, there’s only one person he wants alive.”

Daryl’s eyes narrowed as he looked at you. “No. Hell no! Ya ain’t goin’ out there as bait!” he roared at you.

“This is the right call,” you said urgently. “You know it is! If we tell him that I want to talk about a truce we can lead him away from the communities and—”

“And give him the perfect opportunity to get his goddamn hands back on ya!”

“That’s not gonna happen. We just need to get him somewhere we can control and then—”

“No. I ain’t lettin’ ya do this! We’ll figure something else out!”

“How? We’ve already lost so many people. We’re low on ammo and guns and supplies…” But your jaw was set and your chin was inclined. “I don’t need your permission. If it was anyone else besides me who was going to bait him out, you know you’d say this was the right call. Hell, if it were you, you’d be out the door already!”

Daryl paced angrily in front of the bed, rubbing a hand over the stubble on his face. “Nah. It’s insane. Ya ain’t doin’ it.”

You heaved a sigh. “You can’t stop me, Daryl. I want this over! I just need this to be over!” Your eyes were a bit wide and desperate. “I’ll use their radio and call him up. I’ll tell him I want to bargain a truce. I know how to manipulate him. I’ve done it before, remember?”

He let out a scoff. “And then what? Ya think Negan is just gonna waltz in to a meeting unarmed? Ya think he ain’t gonna roll up with a crew?”

“We’ll have more time to plan than he will. We set a small crew of sharp-shooters ahead of time. We get everything set up and then I give him a tight deadline for the meeting. He won’t have time to put some crazy, elaborate scheme in motion. If I do it right, he won’t be able to resist. Hell, I might even be able to convince him to come alone! Either because he really thinks we’re gonna cave now that he’s out, or because he thinks he’s going to—to be able to have me again. It wouldn’t be completely unprecedented for me to do something completely self-sacrificial…” you trailed off, avoiding Daryl’s eyes. “He won’t kill me. You heard it from his own mouth. But you? He’ll gladly put a bullet in your head the first instant he sees you.”

“If he gets his hands on ya, it’ll be worse than ya bein’ dead,” Daryl growled. Daryl felt sick just thinking about you being in the same goddamn state as Negan, let alone this bullshit. “I can’t let ya do this. If it goes wrong—”

“There’s no other way. If you can come up with a plan that doesn’t end up with a whole lot more of our people dead and all the communities destroyed, please let me know. Because that’s what’s coming if we wait. They’ve got Eugene. I don’t even want to think about what they’re gonna make him do next.”

Daryl rubbed his hands over his face and gave you a long look. His expression was somewhat tortured. “If you’re goin’ out there to do that, then I’m gonna be right there. And don’t even try and argue. I’m gonna be the one to line his head up in the crosshairs and pull the goddamn trigger.”

You stared at him for a long moment, seemingly frozen, before you nodded. “Fine. If that’s what it’s going to take for you to let me do this… But I mean it. You have to stay hidden. If he or his men see you—”

“I know. But there’s no way I’m lettin’ ya go out there without me. If somethin’ goes wrong and I’m not there…” he trailed off.

You nodded. “Okay. Okay…” You hesitated only a moment. “Let’s figure it out.”

A short time later, you and Daryl were leaning over a map on your kitchen island. “Right here,” you said, pointing a spot that was almost halfway between The Hilltop and The Sanctuary. You knew the landscape was patchy woods and clearings. “It’s sort of neutral ground. Probably open enough to make him comfortable that we’re not hiding a huge force somewhere too close.”

Daryl nodded. “Alright…” He glanced up at your expression, which was steely. “You’re sure you want to do this?”

You met his blue eyes and nodded. “I am.”

He sighed heavily and shook his head. “So, that’s it? You, me, and Rosita. And you’re just gonna walk up to him unarmed,” he said.

“It doesn’t matter that I’m unarmed as long as I can get him somewhere for you or Rosita to take the shot. I need him to feel comfortable enough to actually stay for a minute. I can’t roll up with a goddamn rifle.”

“He ain’t comin’ unarmed,” Daryl said. “And I doubt he’ll come alone.”

“It’ll be fine,” you said.

Daryl’s stomach was already churning. “I hate this,” he muttered angrily, pushing up on his hands and moving away from the map.

You leaned back against the kitchen island. “I know.”

“Then why the hell are we doin’ it?!”

“Daryl, we’ve been over this… what’s the alternative?”

“I don’t know! I don’t know, alright! But there’s gotta be somethin’ else—"

“There isn’t,” you said, surprisingly softly. “So, just… just come upstairs and let me have my way with you before I start this insane thing tomorrow.”

Daryl stared at you with that classic Daryl Dixon glare. “If ya think sayin’ that is somehow gonna make me forget this is happenin’ you’re wrong.”

“I know,” you said, straightening up and crossing the space to him, reaching out and gripping his sides. “I’m not asking you to forget. I’m asking you to come upstairs so we can pretend that it’s not for a little while…”

Daryl’s face softened a little and he studied your face for a long moment before sighing. “Fine. Ya know I can’t say no to that.”

“Good,” you breathed, arching up onto your toes and kissing him hard, looping your arms around his neck.

_ _ _ _ _ _

“Well, suck my dick and slap my ass…”

You rolled your eyes as Negan’s voice drifted back to you through the two-way radio. “Yeah, I’ll pass on both of those actually…”

His laughter came through next. “Gotta say, Y/N. You’re about the last person I expected to hear from. Old Rick the Prick? Sure. But not you. I have to say, I am intrigued.”

“This has gone on long enough. We’ve both lost enough people. I want to talk about some sort of arrangement so we can end this for good,” you said.

There was a long silence on the other end. “So, that’s why you’re callin’ me up. I bet Rick the Prick doesn’t even know you’re doin’ this, does he? Because he is hellbent on my extinction. Or haven’t you noticed?”

“You want to talk about Rick or do you want to talk about ending this?”

Another long silence before he answered. “Some people would say that the fact you’re even offering a compromise means I’m on the right track, means I’m winning…”

“Some people might say that. Others might say it’s because I’m just sick of all the death. And I know deep down you don’t want to see any more of your people dead. So, I guess the important thing is what do you say?”

You didn’t know that at that moment Negan was biting his lip, smiling, listening to the strong tone of your voice. “Y/N, you know I’ve gotta tell ya, you takin’ charge like this is really turnin’ me on. I can’t tell you how much I would just love to bend you over the nearest table and fuck your brains out…” Beside you Daryl shifted angrily and clenched his fists. A brief crackle of static came before Negan’s voice sounded from the radio again. “I would really love to see you again, honey. I know you ran away from me twice, but I just can’t help myself! You are like the drug I can’t quit and maybe some delusional part of me thinks I could tame that wild streak of yours…”

You avoided Daryl’s eyes. He looked like he was about to lose his shit and call the whole thing off, but in truth, this was going better than you expected. Some part of you was realizing that, holy fuck, you might truly be Negan’s weak spot. You felt like he was about to propose a meeting.

And you were right.

“I tell you what, you come talk to me face to face and I’ll entertain the idea of a truce,” he said. “But just you. No army, no honey-bun Daryl, no goddamn bullshit.”

You paused for a moment as if you were thinking his offer over. “You really think I’m just going to walk into some trap you have set for me? And I suppose you want me to come unarmed. Should I put myself in handcuffs for you too?” You tried to sound scornful.

“Well, only if you want to cut straight to playtime, doll,” he said with a chuckle. “As for the weapons, yes I do expect you to come unarmed. We’re just gonna talk, right?”

“So you’re gonna be unarmed too?”

Another laugh through the radio. “Hell no! I will be packing. You, along with those losers you’ve attached yourself to for reasons I still do not understand, have already tried to kill me a few times! Tried and failed, but tried nonetheless. But you know I could never, ever really hurt you… Even though you’ve been such a bad, bad wife…” Daryl flinched when Negan said ‘wife.’ “But you’ve got nothing to worry about, doll.”

Just then you felt a twist in your stomach, some surge of nerves now that this was all becoming so real. You shook it off. “And you’re coming alone?” you said. “How could I possibly trust you, Negan?”

“You name the time and place and I’ll be there. No bullshit,” he said. His deep voice was calm, confident. This was working way better than you anticipated.

You paused and looked at Daryl again, heaving in a few breaths before pressing the button down on the side of the radio to speak. “Fine. I’ll come alone, if you come alone. But listen to me, Negan, if there is so much as a blade of grass that looks out of place, I’m gone.”

Another laugh. “I’d expect nothing less, clever girl. Just name when and where.”

You gulped. “Tomorrow. One o’clock. Partway between Hilltop and the Sanctuary. There’s a field just past mile marker 31.”

“I will see you then. And I’ll try to be on my best behavior.” You could hear the smirk in his voice.

“I mean it, Negan. I just want this over with,” you said. That wasn’t a lie. You did. It just wouldn't be on his terms.

“So do I, Y/N. I know you think I’m a heartless bastard but… I do care about people.”

You rolled your eyes again. “Just be there,” you growled into the radio.

“Oh, I will be. See you then, darlin’.”

#daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon twd #the walking dead #twd fanfics #daryl dixon drabbles #daryl imagines #daryl dixon x reader #fanfics #writers of tumblr #twd drabbles #sacrifice

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ddixons-angel · 3 years ago

Text

Fated: Season 8

Summary: Gloria Rhee narrowly escapes Atlanta with her brother as the outbreak reaches the city. Luckily, they find a camp outside the city and together, they fend through encounters with the living and undead.

Starts a little before Season 1 and then follows the main storyline of the show.

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Glenn Sister!OC

Warnings: major TWD spoilers, language, violence (the typical TWD stuff)

A/N: and here we are... the FINAL (temporarily anyway hehe) chapter of Fated! It’s a pretty bittersweet feeling since I grew so attached to this series, I don’t really want it to end, which is why I have plans to continue it with the next few seasons of the show! And I know that the gif I used for this chapter was from season 6... but it was so hard to find any gifs of Daryl smiling... which is sad :( ANYWAY, let’s go forth with the last chapter!!!

Chapter 10

It was mid afternoon at the Hilltop, people were going about their lives and doing their chores around the community. Gloria lies in her bed with a tired smile as she watches Daryl cradle the newborn baby girl in his arms, cooing at their daughter she had just given birth to mere hours ago.

“Hey,” Gloria calls out as she sits herself up on the bed, “haven’t you hogged her enough?”

Daryl looks at her and scoffs playfully, “ya’ve had her for nine months, and ya say I’m hoggin’ her.”

“That’s not even the same thing! And for the record, I didn’t even know I had her for the first four months.” she argues with a pout.

“Tha’s yer fault.” Daryl replies with a smirk then looks down at the baby girl in his arms, “isn’t it? Hm?”

Gloria isn’t able to hide her smile as she sees Daryl talking to the baby, she then opens her arms in his direction, “can I at least get some affection from my husband then?”

Daryl looks at her and smiles at her words, he steps towards the bed as Gloria scoots to the side, making room for him to sit down. Cradling the baby in his arm, wrapping his other around Gloria who snuggles into him. She leans her head on his chest as she smiles down at their daughter.

“How did we make something so innocent and pure like her?” Gloria says softly, not wanting to wake up the sleeping girl.

“She gets all that from ya,” he says, pressing a kiss on Gloria’s forehead, “she wouldn’ be here if it weren’t for ya.”

“You say that as if you don’t know how babies are made,” she chuckles, making Daryl roll his eyes.

“I mean it,” he looks at her sincerely, “ya carried her for 9 months, yer body protected her, even from the Saviors and ya didn’t even know ya had her. If ya weren’t as tough and strong as ya are, she might not’ve made it.”

Gloria smiles at his words and brushes their daughter’s cheek gently with her finger, “I can’t take all the credit for that, she’s a little fighter too, I just did my role as a mother, even if I didn’t know it yet, my body for sure did.”

Daryl hums in agreement, “an’ I’ll protect ya both, like a dad’s supposed to.”

Gloria looks at Daryl at his words, “hey,” she calls out to him in a whisper as she caresses his face.

There was a sadness in Daryl’s voice and Gloria knew where it came from. She knew very well what kind of man Daryl’s father was and what he did to Daryl and Merle when they were kids.

“You’re gonna be such an amazing father, I can tell.” she says with a soft smile.

“Can ya?” he lets out a small chuckle.

Gloria nods, “just by the way you hold her, you’re a natural. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you had more experience, and I’m not just talking about Judith.”

“Hmm... maybe I do an’ jus’ never told ya.” Daryl teases with a smirk.

She eyes him playfully, “you’re lucky I love you.”

“You’re right, I am,” he says, pulling her in for a kiss, “I’m the luckiest man alive.”

Gloria giggles into his lips and kisses him back tenderly. Their kiss is interrupted by a knock on the door, the two pull away from each other as Maggie opens the door with a smile.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” she asks.

“Not too bad, given that I just popped a baby out of me,” Gloria says with a chuckle.

“Are you able to walk?” Maggie asks, “Carol’s downstairs with the others, if you’re too tired I can let them know.”

“I think I’ll be okay, I may need you to help me down the stairs though,” Gloria smiles.

Maggie chuckles and nods, going over to Gloria as she gets off the bed, “since you got attached, you hold onto her,” Gloria says to Daryl.

He scoffs playfully and gets off the bed as well, not denying that he did get attached to their daughter fairly quickly. The three of them make it out the room with Daryl carrying the little girl in his arms as they go down the stairs. Maggie gently holds onto Gloria as she takes each step and finally they’re on the ground floor. Gloria turns into what she considered the lobby of the Barrington house and she’s greeted by delighted smiles of people from Alexandria and the Kingdom. Carol is the first to go up to hug her.

“We came as soon as we heard it was happening,” she says as she pulls away from the hug, “how are you feeling?”

“Tired, exhausted, can’t wait to sleep,” Gloria says with a chuckle.

“I have some bad news for you then,” Rick says with a teasing smile, “you and Daryl aren’t gonna have a good night’s sleep for a while.”

“I don’ sleep much anyway,” Daryl mutters then turns his attention to their daughter who had woken up, “right? You’re gonna keep us up, aren’t ya?”

“I’ve never seen Daryl like that before,” Aaron says in awe as he watches the two.

“He was like that with Judith,” Michonne grins at the sight.

Daryl looks at the others who are staring at him, slight blush creeping on his cheeks, “what?”

Tara shrugs, “I just don’t think I’ve ever seen or heard you be so... gentle before?”

“Yeah, it’s amazing what kind of hold she has on you,” Rosita grins as she teases Daryl.

Eugene nods as he stands beside her, “I have to say, witnessing Daryl as amiable as he is right now is really a sight to behold.”

Daryl purses his lips and looks to Gloria for help and she chuckles as she shakes her head, “alright guys, that’s enough, you’re embarrassing him.”

“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, Daryl,” Ezekiel smiles warmly at him, “I believe what the others are trying to say is that you are a natural with your kin.”

“You’re a natural, dude!” Jerry chimes in cheerily.

“Thanks..” Daryl mutters, his face still a light shade of pink.

“So!” Jesus starts, clapping his hands together, “Have you two decided on a name for your little girl?”

His question turns their immediate attention to Daryl and Gloria, patiently waiting for their answer. They all look eager to chime in with suggestions if needed. Gloria smiles at this and glances at Daryl.

“Go ahead,” he says with a small smile.

Gloria nods then looks at the others, mainly focusing on Maggie and Carol, “we decided to name her Sophia Bethany Dixon.”

Grateful smiles light up Maggie and Carol’s faces as they hear the name given. Gloria lets out a breath of relief when they thank her with a deep hug. She and Daryl had discussed it when they found out they had a daughter. Gloria thought it was only fitting to name her after Sophia and Beth to honor the girls.

---

Sophia is now a few days old as Gloria places her in the crib beside Hershel’s. She’s finally drifted off to sleep after a crying fit. Gloria lets out a soft sigh then goes to check on Hershel and smiles at his little sleeping figure. She tucks them both in to make sure they’re sound asleep then leaves the nursery. She makes her way to Maggie’s office and knocks three times before opening the door.

“Hey Maggie-” Gloria says as she opens the door but cuts herself short when she doesn’t see her sister-in-law in the room.

Instead, she’s met by Jesus standing by the door, Rick leaning on the desk, Daryl sitting on one of the chairs placed along the wall, and Ezekiel and Aaron standing by the chairs facing the desk. Gloria blinks as they all turn to look at her.

“Everythin’ okay?” Daryl perks up when he sees his wife in the doorway as if he’s ready to ditch whatever conversation is going on.

“Yeah, I’m just looking for Maggie, wanted to let her know the kids are out,” Gloria smiles at him then glances around the room, “so what’s going on here?”

“Nothin’-” Daryl tries to speak but he’s interrupted by Rick.

“Shouldn’t she have a say in this?” Rick says, gesturing to Gloria.

Gloria furrows her brows in confusion, crossing her arms and leaning on the door, propping it open, “have a say in what?”

“We’re trying to decide who Sophia’s Godfather should be.” Aaron informs her.

“Godfather?” Gloria lets out a chuckle, amused, “let me guess, you all have amazing reasons for why we should pick you?”

“I’m a King!” Ezekiel exclaims.

“I saved your life,” Aaron reminds her.

“Daryl’s my brother.” Rick says matter-of-factly.

“Come on, you call me Jesus.” he says, giving Gloria a knowing look.

“Ya see what I had to deal with in the last hour?” Daryl groans.

She shakes her head as she lets out a laugh, “okay... Ezekiel, you’re gonna be too busy taking care of the Kingdom and looking after Henry. Aaron, as much as I am very appreciative of you saving my life, you have your hands full with Gracie, already. And Rick, being Daryl’s brother means you’re already her uncle. Plus, all of you are busy in your own communities anyway.”

Jesus looks at her with a grin, “does that mean I win?”

“I can’t say I don’t like calling you Jesus and being her Godfather. ” Gloria tells him.

As she speaks, the main door to the Barrington house opens and Maggie, Carol, Rosita, and Tara walk in. The women glance at each other as they see Gloria standing in the doorway of Maggie’s office, propping open the door with her body.

“What’s going on?” Maggie asks as she walks towards her office.

Gloria turns to look at Maggie, “the guys are fighting over who’s Sophia’s Godfather.”

“My bet’s on Jesus.” Tara chips in, “his name, it’s Jesus!”

“Thank you!” he exclaims from inside the room, then grins cheekily, “and you were about to name me Sophia’s Godfather before they walked in?”

“Well, no,” Gloria chuckles as he pouts, “I was about to say that you’re going to have to fight Carol on the Godparent position.”

Gloria had this conversation with the women before Sophia was born. Maggie and Gloria had an agreement that since they were directly Hershel’s and Sophia’s aunts, it wouldn’t be fair for the others to give each other the title. Maggie had appointed Tara as Hershel’s Godmother. Rosita was perfectly fine with being their aunt. Daryl was more than accepting of Carol being his child’s Godmother.

Rick, Jesus, and Aaron groan in disappointment, knowing that it was impossible to beat Carol in a fight, as Ezekiel grins happily, “oh glorious day! I have been named Godfather of the lovely Sophia Bethany Dixon! Haha!”

The others look at Ezekiel in confusion while Carol freezes at his words. Gloria glances over at Carol and notices her cheeks flushing a light pink. A grin spreads across Gloria’s face and her grin is noticed by the other women and they all turn to look at Carol. She looks at them nervously and fidgets, making the other women giggle.

“Congratulations, Carol.” Gloria chuckles, patting Carol’s arm.

She rolls her eyes playfully at her and smiles, “thank you, now if we can stop him from announcing it to the world, that would be nice.”

They laugh at her words as Ezekiel says his speech, announcing his relationship with Carol, earning a groan from her. Everyone except for Carol is immersed in Ezekiel’s poetic proclamation of love for her when a baby’s cry catches Maggie and Gloria’s attention.

“That’s Hershel,” Maggie says, instinctually heading towards the nursery, then a second cry can be heard.

“And he woke Sophia...” Gloria sighs as she follows Maggie into the nursery.

---

A few months have passed since Sohia was born. She is now able to sit up with some assistance as she plays in the nursery with Hershel beside her. Gloria sits on the other side of her in case Sophia loses her balance and falls. Maggie comes into the nursery with two bottles of formula and sits down on the ground beside her son.

“Here,” Maggie says, handing a bottle to Gloria, “just so they don’t whine when they’re hungry.”

She chuckles and nods, “thanks, we both know how impatient these two can get.”

Maggie smiles and hums in agreement as they watch their children. Hershel and Sophia were both busy playing with the toys in front of them. As the two of them reach for the same toy, Hershel reaches it first but lets go of it when Sophia grabs it and lets out a small whimper when she isn’t able to get it. Hershel watches her as she giggles when she is able to get the toy then he gently reaches over to her and pats her head. The sight of brotherly affection brings tears to Gloria’s eyes as Maggie smiles in awe at the two.

“Did you see that?” Maggie says, her voice full of delight.

Gloria nods, sniffling slightly as she tries to hold in her tears, “Yeah...”

Maggie looks over and her brows furrow in concern, “Gloria... what’s wrong? Talk to me.”

“Nothing... he just reminds me so much of Glenn...” she says with a soft tearful smile.

“There’s more to it than that,” Maggie reaches her hand out and holds Gloria’s, “there’s been something bothering you even before the war ended, don’t think I didn’t notice.”

Gloria looks at Maggie and sighs deeply, “I disappointed Glenn...”

Maggie frowns at this, “what makes you say that?”

“I let revenge, hate, and anger get to me, I killed a lot of people-” Gloria is cut off by Maggie.

“We were fighting a war, what did you expect?,” Maggie tells her.

“I became a cold hearted killer, Maggie...” Gloria lets out a breath, “I killed a lot of people on my own because I wanted all of the Saviors to die to avenge Glenn. I wanted them all dead so I did what I thought was right, I thought they were all bad people... but now I see they can be people we can even trust, like Alden, Laura... what if I killed people who didn’t deserve to die?”

“That’s the unfortunate thing about a war, people die. A lot of people die, even those who don’t deserve it, you were protecting what was yours, taking back what belongs to you. You did what you had to do.” Maggie tries to comfort her.

“What if I didn’t have to kill all those people? What if I only thought it was what I had to do because I was blinded by rage? What if I made the wrong choices?” Gloria says as a tear rolls down her cheek.

“Then you admit that you made a mistake,” Maggie reaches out and wipes the tear away, “admit that you made a mistake then fix it.”

“How? I killed a lot of people, Maggie... how do I fix that?” Gloria asks.

Maggie ponders for a moment then smiles softly, “do you remember back at the farm when I was mad at Glenn for telling everyone about the walkers in the barn?”

“How could I forget? You egged him.” Gloria says with a slight chuckle.

Maggie chuckles and nods, “I did, but then afterwards, you came up to me and gave me good reasons to give him a chance to explain himself. Did he ever tell you what he said to me?”

Gloria shakes her head, “he didn’t, and I never thought it was my business to ask.”

“He told me that he knows he screwed everything up with me by telling everyone about the barn, and that he knows there’s no going back in time to undo it, but he believes that he can make up for it by doing the right thing.” Maggie explains.

“That is such a Glenn thing to say...” Gloria chuckles, “do the right thing... how do I know what’s the right thing to even do?”

“I asked him the same thing when he said it, and can you guess what he said to me?” Maggie says.

Gloria ponders for a moment, “that his heart would know.”

Maggie widens her eyes in awe, not expecting Gloria to actually be able to guess, then smiles and nods, “exactly.”

Gloria smiles at Maggie then she looks at Hershel and Sophia as they share toys with each other. Sophia coos at Hershel as she hands him a building block and Hershel responds with a babble. Gloria’s heart had her answer, she’d start by properly raising Sophia and protecting her, making sure that she would know the right choices to make. That’s only the start but that’s how she would be able to make it up to Glenn.

---

“Hey, she’s almost a year old,” Gloria says over her shoulder as she sits on the bed with a notebook propped open.

“Already?” Daryl responds, sitting on the bed and leaning on the headboard with Sophia bouncing in his lap, “you’re growin’ so fast.”

“Mhm, today’s day three hundred and fifty,” Gloria says as she writes the number on the top of the page.

She’d been keeping a journal since the day that Sophia was born. Gloria wanted to be able to keep track of her daughter’s daily progression, and to make sure she didn’t lose track of her birthday; if the adults weren’t able to have a birthday, at least her daughter would be able to have one.

Sophia lets out a babble and points to Daryl’s face then begins to giggle. He raises his eyebrow at this and playfully eyes her.

“I think she’s laughin’ at me,” he says, earning a chuckle from Gloria, “are ya laughin’ at me? Huh? Ya laughin’ at yer dad?”

“Dada!” Sophia squeals.

Daryl freezes in place as Gloria snaps her head back to look at the two, “did she just... call you Dada?”

“I dunno...” he says in a whisper as he stares at her.

Gloria puts the book on the nightstand beside the bed then moves to sit beside Daryl, “Sophia, did you say Dada? Can you say that again?”

Sophia looks at her mom and blinks, letting out a few incoherent babbles. Gloria remembers that Harlan told her babies tend to babble things that sound like mommy or daddy when they’re around Sophia’s age but they might not have any recognition of what those sounds mean. She decides to test it; she waves her hand in front of Sophia to get her attention then points to Daryl.

“Dada!” she says again.

“You’re her first word!” Gloria exclaims happily.

Daryl grins and leans down to kiss her forehead, “knew ya were a daddy’s girl.”

“Don’t ruin the moment,” Gloria rolls her eyes playfully.

He chuckles then leans back as Sophia decides that she’s going to plop on Daryl and snuggle him, “Dada.”

Gloria smiles at the sight and kisses the top of Sophia’s head then moves up to kiss Daryl’s cheek. She adjusts herself so that she’s lying down beside him.

“I guess this is how you’re sleeping tonight?” Gloria says as she sees Sophia closing her eyes.

“Guess so.” Daryl says softly then carefully moves his arm to wrap around Gloria, pulling her close to him.

For the last two and a half years, life had been hectic for Daryl and Gloria to say the least. The outbreak that caused the end of the world was a blessing in disguise as they had only found each other after the world ended. Many would and have considered them an unpredictable couple, but together they fought through the odds. Whether it was fighting the walkers or the people who turned into monsters because of the outbreak, they would get through all of it together. They belong together. They are fated to be together.

---

This was literally just a chapter of pure fluff.... AND I LOVE IT. I couldn’t really think of a better way to end this series, but like I said before, this is only a temporary end! I have some ideas for the next seasons ^^

I want to say a huge THANK YOU to everyone who’s supported this story, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so so so so much for reading, commenting, liking, and just being there for me throughout this story. I love you all so much! You guys are the best!

Please let me know what you thought of this chapter, I always love hearing from you~!

Taglist (please let me know if you’d like to be added/removed!):

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shimmershae · 3 years ago

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My thoughts on Episode 7--Promises Broken

Placed behind a cut for those of you that would rather escape my babbling, lol. You’re welcome.

The episode opens with Maggie, Elijah, Father Gabe, and Negan.

Right away I can’t help feeling disappointed because the emotional core of last episode (Kelly and Connie’s reunion and the aftermath) seems like it’s being ignored and punted further down the road so we can waste another hour getting piece meal progress on the Reaper front, but I’m going to try to push my misgivings away and enjoy this episode for what it is, so.

“Daryl just told us to go home.”

And save your hides and keep the rest of the community safe? I can’t argue that Negan might have an actual point here, lol. But Maggie sure can.

Not gonna lie. When Negan came back with “I think he was being subtle. He said they were armed with lookouts” I had to LOL.

“We will never be even.” I mean. Maggie been frustrating me with her stubbornness in this suicide mission, true. But she right. They will never, ever be even.

“Ya’ll know Blackbeard, too?” I admit it. I laughed. A little.

Okay. I don’t know if this bodes well for this episode or not, but the cold opening in this episode? Was the most underwhelming cold open of this season.

At least the opening credits still give me that old familiar rush of the heyday of TWD.

Fake Stephanie and Eugene are on Walker clean up duty. Hmm. I think I’m going to refer to Fake Stephanie as Fifi until she gets a real name for brevity’s sake.

Fifi handles herself surprisingly well with the Walkers. Is she one of Mercer’s stormtroopers working undercover maybe?

Somehow I doubt it’s true that our friends can trust “Lance” but whatever, lol.

I hate to admit it but I’m already kind of bored with this episode. We’re barely over 6 minutes in.

I didn’t recognize Princess without her fluffy pink coat!

Zeke is definitely struggling.

I do like that these two have been paired up. They have taken to each other quickly and already have a good rapport. There’s something endearing about their scenes together.

“Never been afraid of hard work. Kinda anti-friends who die from stubbornness.” Have I mentioned lately how much I love Princess? Because I really, really do.

So it’s been days. Has it been days that Maggie and Negan and Co. have been outrunning the Reapers? I’m talking since they left the safe house. Does that mean that it’s also been days since Kelly and Connie’s reunion? This timeline is so slow and yet they keep telling us it’s been days and making me think we’ve been missing time. Like I can’t even.

You know Carol’s “Pookie is in danger” senses have to be big-time tingling by now if it’s been DAYS.

Also? Alden almost certainly has to be dead.

But I digress. They obviously don’t want us getting hung up on the apparent time warp between ASZ, Meridian, and the Commonwealth. It’s like the Bermuda Triangle of the ZA.

“A person with your pedigree...”

Okay then. Commonwealth is full of uppity assholes. Good to know.

Yumiko looks classy! I say that in my best Princess voice, lol.

Well. At least they’ve given Daryl Dog back. Has Dog come to his senses though? That is the question.

Daryl sharing a smoke with the enemy to gain some intel. Or maybe just the keys to food storage.

So. Another redshirt (Elijah’s sister’s friend) we don’t know bites the dust. Meh. Including that tidbit in the trailer was purposefully misleading, lol. Not that I want people to die, but still.

“But the one? He’s mine.” Let’s take bets. Was it Carver Elijah has a beef with because it just seems like it was. Could also be that his name is the only one I know, lol.

Where is Maggie sending our hobbled Father G?

“I kept my mask for practical and sentimental reasons.” Negan? You almost had me. He really can’t help his inherent asshole-ishness can he?

But seriously. Yuck at what they about to do because I assume Alpha and Co. at least cured the nasty skins.

I wish I could say I give a damn that they’re attempting to give Leah some more likeable layers but it’s a cheap cheat so naw.

There’s that damn river that symbolizes the great divide between Daryl and his love and his family. At least it’s pretty.

I’m with Daryl. Is Pope just looking to cleanse the earth of those he doesn’t feel belong or what? Wheedle the truth out of her, Daryl.

“You never needed anyone to make you strong.”

Think our guy has ever said this to his real girl?

It’s kinda funny that the Whisperer flunkie is now the herding Whisperer tutor.

Is that the Reaper’s version of a priest? Sorry. I swear. I’ve been trying to pay attention during their scenes. But my mind wanders because it feels like Woodbury and the Sanctuary all over again. The Whisperers at least were elevated by Samantha Morton, Ryan Hurst, Thora Birch, and yes, Jeffrey Dean Morgan. Like I love Norman Reedus and the character he’s crafted in Daryl but he’s not enough to have me enthralled with Leah and these dudes. I don’t care if they were all Calendar pinups before the ZA.

Truly. A+ casting with Yumiko’s brother.

Yeah. Something’s definitely fishy about Tomi’s reluctance to go back to his old life in the Commonwealth, but the desire for a slower, less stressful existence is definitely relatable so I’m not going to hold that part against him at all.

What did Maggie say after Elijah asked if Negan had changed? Because I replayed it a handful of times and still don’t know.

This Lancy Hornsby dude reeks of slimy politician.

Too much one on one Daryl and Leah in this episode. Without any kind of chemistry at least these two drag each other and their parts of the episode down. Leah’s character is a fail for me and it has nothing to do with shipping reasons. She’s just not believable or authentic to her role as a mercenary.

“If I could do it all over again, I’d have killed every single one of you.” Damn. Well. He’s being true to himself, I guess. Unapologetically Negan.

Again. I can’t say Negan’s wrong exactly but shit does he deliver some uncomfortable truths.

Princess’s childlike delight over treats is <3.

Look at Eugene running toward danger! OG Eugene would never. Abe would be so proud.

Eugene and Fifi actually work pretty good together but it all feels so staged. I feel sorry for our guy.

“This guy was being, well, an asshole.” LMAO @ Josh’s delivery. The asshole definitely deserved that punch and his date deserved to be eaten.

Real Stephanie is so pretty.

Aww. She’s concerned about Eugene.

Oh shit. Eugene punched Pamela Milton’s little entitled prick of a son. This feels like the ASZ Monroes all over again. Sorry. I can’t remember their names.

Poor Eugene. Have I said that already?

Is this Lance Hornsby guy the lesser of two evils or...”

All the chances you’ve gotten, hmm? Seems to me they’ve been set up for some failure too, though.

Maggie and Negan leading a herd where? Meridian?

That poor woman. Just wanting her family safe and spared of seeing her meet her maker.

So Leah’s not completely cold. Okay. Doesn’t mean she’s able to be saved though.

At this point, Kang is just yanking Daryl’s chain and ours in the process.

Even hidden behind that skin mask, Elijah made me tear up when he saw his sister.

No previews? What a copout.

Not Kang correlating Maggie and Negan to child and coach, lol.

The narrative they keep pushing about the villains having families and FEELINGS doesn’t change much for me, Angela. Gracie was the only innocent in that outpost Team Family attacked. I’m not saying they should have done it but stop trying to make the bad guys sympathetic. It isn’t earned.

Interesting how she mentions Gabe is trying so very hard to hold onto faith.

If Leah’s the frog boiling in that pot? They better be serving frog legs to the starving community she’s hunting. Just saying.

Overall impression of this episode?

It was boring. No seriously.

I wish I could say I liked it better but it was just meh. I can’t even muster up any words because I just feel blah about it and that’s not a good feeling to have going into the first final (mid? half? tri? I don’t know what to call it) episode of the season.

Withholding the previews further adds to the doldrums because what is there to actually be excited about here after that episode? At least try to pique our interest, Angela.

#The Walking Dead #Season 11 #TWD spoilers #things that make me smile and cry #for reasons

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twdmusicboxmystery · 3 years ago

Text

TWD 11x05: Out of the Ashes - Details

Okay, let's talk details of 11x05.

***As always, spoilers abound below for 11x05. Don’t read until you’ve watched!***

We start with Aaron's dream. First of all, there's the full moon. Remember that Still had a full moon at the beginning, and every time we saw Beta on the outside, such as singing or walking with walkers, it often showed a full moon. In Beta's case, it's probably because his nickname as a singer was Half Moon, but he also had a lot of Beth symbolism around him. I think it’s likely that the reason they gave the name Half Moon was to indicate Beth symbolism.

Then, Aaron says to Gracie, "we’re almost home." Part of the home theme, and also kind of showed me that this was a dream. There's absolutely no reason why Aaron would randomly be outside the walls with Gracie at night. I don't have a whole lot more to add to the scene than what I said yesterday. I do believe it's a foreshadow of something happening with Gracie, but it also may be a foreshadow of other things that are coming, including stuff with Beth.

This is kind of a funny detail, but I have to say that I love the Jerry bit at the beginning. We see him tiptoeing over people, trying not to wake them on his way to the bathroom. So, we have an entire sequence that can be summed up as, "Jerry pees.” ;D

The next thing we saw was the Commonwealth video. The really cheesy one with Lance Hornsby that we saw in the trailer. Some of the symbols we saw in that video were interesting. Such as a bunny cake (rabbit theme), someone playing a guitar (Beth played a guitar in 5x09),

ice cream (both Eugene and Stephanie talked about ice cream and it became sort of a Bethyl theme, especially because there were so much Bethyl symbolism around them during those conversations; also, Daryl had his “I never” about frozen yogurt in Still). We see a plaque that says, "The Great War,” (probably a reference to World War I, but also part of the Revolution/War theme).

There was also a blond, Beth-lookalike nurse in blue scrubs. 👀

I also noticed that the Commonwealth badge looks a lot like the UK flag. Not so much in its shape or design, but rather the colors. It's got the same red and blue shades as the United Kingdom flag. Remember that we saw the UK flag around Juliet Ormonde's character in the world beyond. So, we think it's a symbol of the war to come with the CRM.

When Yumiko goes into the bakery looking for her brother, there's a song playing called “Three Speed Girl.” It was just the three that caught my attention. (Look up lyrics). They all a lot of apples in the bakery. Not real apples but glass, decorative ones. Not only Apple theory, but specifically what apples represent.

I've theorized before that the apples could represent separation between loved ones. For example, in 6x14, we see Michonne and Rick wake up together in the room and they both eat an apple. I came to believe that was a foreshadow of Rick leaving in S9 and two of them being separated. @frangipanilove, however, explained it differently. She says that rather than them being separated, she thinks apples represent them coming back together. As then, a reunion after the separation.

I know that sounds like the opposite of what I explained, but really all amounts to the same thing. The kind of separation that I mentioned is what we see with Rick and Michonne being separated, Beth and Daryl being separated, perhaps even Carol and Zeke being separated (if he does, in fact, get a death fake out). And that's always going to result in a reunion down the road. So if we explain as a separation, it will always lead to a reunion. And if we explain as a reunion, it in order for reunion to take place, there must've been a separation first. See what I mean? You can explain it either way.

So, the apples make total sense in the scene. Yumiko has been separated from her brother for a long time. She said it's been years because the two of them were somewhat estranged, even before the apocalypse happened. And now, in this episode, we see a reunion. So, I think were spot on about the Apple symbolism.

As for Beth, we didn't actually see her eat an apple. I think that would've been too on-the-nose. But, given the Snow White symbolism, or template of her arm falling, remember that Snow White ate an apple, which was poisonous, just before we fell she fell and we saw her arm. So, if TWD is using the apple to represent separation, we didn't actually see Beth eat one, but her arm falling like that represents the Snow White template, and right after that, we see her separation from Daryl and the rest of TF. I think it lines up rather well.

When Eugene and Stephonie are walking around, we see a white horse drawing a mail truck. It's a combination of several very potent symbols. We talked about white horses before and how they represent Beth, and life. Then there's the mail or Communication theme. We've seen so many mailboxes on the show, and this was a horse drawing a mail truck. I’ll talk more about the mailbox theme in a few days. Just keep this in mind for now. They're very purposeful symbols and they do represent specific things in the show.

I also noticed that Stephonie is wearing red rimmed glasses. Remember how last week I talked about how Norman was wearing some funky glasses on TTD? Sorry to keep teasing but this is another thing I’ll post about later in the week. I was going to anyway, so seeing the glasses here jumped out at me. For now, just notice that Stephonie is wearing these and they’re red.

When Stephonie decides to help them talk on the radio, they go into the train station. Of course, there are no actual trains running, but the train is a very potent symbol. It's actually being used more as a civic building, and the group tries to be innocuous, though it's obvious they're up to something. Stephonie and Eugene walked calmly through the building while Princess and Zeke take up positions down in the common lobby area. Meanwhile, Mercer is watching them.

Princess tries to head him off and we have a humorous moment where she tries to flirt with him, and tells him he has beautiful eyelashes. It is not exactly the same thing as the eye theme, but I could almost see them going for the eye theme, but twisting it for the sake of humor, because, well, it's Princess. So, she goes with beautiful eyelashes.

Eugene does manage to get on the radio with Rosita, who tells him the Whisper War is over. They only talk for a moment or two before they lose the feed. Once again, I think that was very purposeful on Commonwealth's part. I think they allowed him to connect with Rosita, but only for a short time before interrupting the feed and bursting into arrest him.

Meanwhile, back in Alexandria, I noticed that Judith asks, "Is he gone?" I sat and thought about this line for a little bit. Obviously, it's the “gone” theme. Usually, the way TWD always uses someone being "gone" to mean that they have disappeared for short time but will return. Very often they are presumed dead. That's why Daryl's, "she's just gone" about Beth is so important. Also, her line to him, "you're going to miss me so bad when I'm gone."

In this case, I don't think either Judith or Rosita suspect that Eugene is actually dead. She just means did they lose him on the radio feed. And here's something that occurred to me what was thinking about this. It's actually very common when someone loses communication with someone else via radio or walkie-talkie to use the phrase, "get them back." So, something like, "see if you can get them back," or, "I'll get them back." In that context, it just means to raise them on the radio again and reestablish a connection so they can communicate.

The reason this is interesting is that Daryl has said this more than once about Beth or people who were kidnapped. In 5x06 when he was with Carol, he was talking about Beth and said they would observe Grady and then do whatever they needed to do to get her back. I know they also said something similar about Sasha when she was taken by the saviors, and Sasha had massive parallels to Beth during her death arc. So, that had never occurred to me before, but it's almost like they specifically took that line about “getting them back” from radio lingo and are applying it to Beth.

When talking about whether to go to Hilltop, Aaron mentioned that he didn't want to abandon ship. So, a water/ship reference, but it's also close to something Abraham said in 5x05 about going down with the ship.

When they get out Hilltop, I noticed that we have a shot of the water tower, which is now burnt. When they start questioning Keith, he says that Alpha is dead, and someone says that all that does is prove that “he has eyes.” Earlier in Alexandria, Aaron said, “Eyes open.” I know these are really small potatoes references, but there were a LOT of eye mentions in this episode.

A couple of things where Negan and Maggie are concerned. When they get to this house, the cars out front are really interesting. There's a red car out front, which reminded me a lot of the red car that was seen during the filming of the missing 17 days in season five. There are also just a lot of cars with doors or hatchbacks open, which represent the door being opened in 5x09, when Beth disappeared. The hatchback being open can represent the trunk being open. So, just kind of some interesting symbols.

I also thought it was cool that Judith is teaching other kids how to fight.

I think that’s it for Details. Anything I missed?

#beth greene #beth greene lives #beth is alive #beth is coming #td theory #td theories #team delusional #team defiance #beth is almost here #bethyl

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elroymeg · 3 years ago

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kafkasmelomania · 4 years ago

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May 22, 2021: The Greatest Mistake of My Life by Holding Absence

*Bandcamp here

Did you know that The Greatest Mistake of My Life takes its name from a song from the 1930s? When lead vocalist Lucas Woodland gave his grandmother a copy of Holding Absence’s self-titled debut album on vinyl, she remarked that it was the second vinyl recording done by anyone in the family. She then told him that his great-uncle “went into Cardiff one day and recorded himself singing. It was like the equivalent of a photo booth where they press it on a small 7’ record and it would have been cheap as hell. She said that it was a song called ‘The Greatest Mistake Of My Life’. So I quizzed her a bit more and all she could remember was the lyric, ‘The greatest mistake of my life was saying goodbye to you’.” (Emphasis mine.) Woodland later looked up that lyric online and discovered a 1939 song by Gracie Fields called “The Greatest Mistake of My Life”. Not only did the band decide to name their sophomore album after the song, they covered it and used that cover as the closing track, which is so cool. As Woodland puts it (emphasis mine):

“I think longevity is truly the greatest achievement a band can accomplish. Some of the best albums of all time weren’t popular when they were released. I’d like to think that this music will last a long time. That’s kind of the point of using “The Greatest Mistake of My Life” as a reference. This song is 90 years old! And now some emo kid from Britain has named an album after it! Everyone involved in that original song is probably not around anymore. But that’s part of what makes it cool. So, if in 90 years’ time, a progressive lo-fi jazz trap band wants to name an album after a Holding Absence song, that would be wicked!”

Longevity comes up more than once in interviews, especially with regard to the Gracie Fields song. For example, from Loudwire (emphasis mine):

“This song has definitely made me realize just how special longevity is in every walk of life! Even things as simple architectural history or the etymology of everyday words. Just seeing how small things can trickle through time and what impact they have is really cool and kinda the ultimate goal as somebody trying to create art.”

Holding Absence took inspiration from a wide variety of places; the Gracie Fields song was just the start. According to Woodland, the song “Beyond Belief” is “the band’s attempt to channel The Cure if they were a 2000s Emo band.” (Emphasis mine) Additionally, “‘Afterlife’ was originally inspired by Mipha off of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. It’s because whenever you die, she brings you back to life.” I thought that was so cool. That whole Aesthetic Magazine interview is really good, by the way; if you liked this album, I highly recommend that you give it a read. One thing I learned from that interview is the origin of the ghostly monologues that appear on several of the tracks (emphasis mine):

“This part was recorded by an American actress with a lovely voice. The things she is saying are passages of poetry that I’d written. I kind of paraphrased comments on a Reddit thread which asked “what are the greatest mistakes of your life?” There were loads of comments and I picked three very different ones and turned them into poems. Then we got the actress to speak on the album. It’s kind of meta and over the top if you think about it, but I just liked the idea of no one having to listen to this album alone. This woman is always there and processing things with you. She’s one of the whispers at the beginning of the album and is also at the end.”

Isn’t that so interesting? Anyway, The Greatest Mistake of My Life has been getting rave reviews and for good reason. There was something in particular that Kerrang said that stuck with me (emphasis mine):

“During the past year, many have tripped over themselves to label certain albums the perfect distillation of the times we’re in. The Greatest Mistake Of My Life is prime for consideration. At a point when our world has been reduced to the walls around us and our thoughts have turned inwards, to lives we may have only half lived before the pandemic began, it’s a document that reminds us not to short change ourselves and seek the happiness we deserve before it’s too late. Nowhere is this sentiment more explicitly captured than ‘Die Alone (In Your Lover’s Arms)’, which agonisingly laments a life spent with the wrong person.”

“[...] to lives we may have only half lived before the pandemic began.” What a fantastic way to put it. Listen to The Greatest Mistake of My Life today!

If you’d like to get involved with stopping the atrocities against Palestine, here’s where you can start (text in bold for readability):

This Carrd is full of information, petitions, and places to donate.

Here are some organizations to which you can donate. This post now includes a list of corporations to boycott.

Here is some information about the Palestinian Children’s Relief Fund and a list of other organizations.

This is a list of actions you can take (somewhat UK-specific). This is a reading list of texts with more background information.

UK petitions: This is a petition for the UK government to formally recognize the State of Palestine. This is a petition to introduce sanctions against Israel. This is a petition to condemn Israel for their treatment of Palestine and Palestinians.

Here’s the Wikipedia overview of the current iteration of the crisis.

If you’re curious about the United States’s involvement: this is a report about U.S. foreign aid to Israel. This is the Wikipedia page for Palestine-United States relations and this is the Wikipedia page for Israel-United States relations.

Here are some perspectives from on the ground in Gaza. This is also explains why spreading the Palestinian point of view. is so important.

This is one Jewish person’s explanation of the conflation of Jewish identity with the modern Israeli state. They mention the Nakba, which is important – per Wikipedia, “the Nakba, […] also known as the Palestinian Catastrophe, was the destruction of Palestinian society and homeland in 1948, and the permanent displacement of a majority of the Palestinian people.”

Black lives matter and here are some ways you can get involved in the fight against racism, specifically anti-black racism (text in bold for readability):

This Linktree and this Carrd are full of ways to confront and fight against anti-black racism: places to donate, advice for protesting, educational resources.

This post is specifically about Daunte Wright and how to help his family. This is Daunte Wright’s memorial fund.

The Minnesota Freedom Fund is doing good work, and since so many people have been recognizing that work and donating to them, they ask that you instead donate to Families Supporting Families Against Police Violence, the Racial Justice Network, Communities United Against Police Brutality, the Minneapolis NAACP, the Council on American-Islamic Relations in Minneapolis, and the Black Immigrant Collective. You can also donate to the Bail Project, which operates in multiple states.

Other organizations to which you can donate are the Black Trans Advocacy Coalition, the NAACP, the NAACP Legal Defense Fund, the Okra Project, the Solutions Not Punishment Collaborative, For The Gworls, G.L.I.T.S., the Marsha P. Johnson Institute, the Black Trans Travel Fund, the Sylvia Rivera Law Project, and the Black Trans Femmes in the Arts Collective.

GoFundMe: Justice for Breonna Taylor, In Memory of Jamarion Robinson, Rent Fund For Black LGBT Family, Esperanza Spalding’s BIPOC Artist Sanctuary, Help the Williams Family Get a Set of Wheels, Survival and Gender Affirming Needs for Black Enby

(via https://open.spotify.com/album/4qY3S2Iz6VpAa2EzhWkrpo?si=m1iGdkTwRFWZk1Lv_3H_BQ)

#holding absence #the greatest mistake of my life #post hardcore #emo #emo music #post rock #alt rock #alternative rock #2020s music #2021 #english #english language #wales #welsh music #album of the day #music rec #album rec

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beyoncesdragon · 5 years ago

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Graham Norton (Harry Styles x Reader)

Requested: No.

Warnings: I've written this ages ago. that should be warning enough.

My Masterlist this can also be found on my Wattpad

The Boys of One Direction were recently on Graham Norton, and I was the last guest he would call on stage. I was slightly nervous, my palms wet and I had to prevent myself from chewing my lipstick off. I had been looking forward to that show and also sharing my time with the boys of One Direction. I had seen them only once and very brief, backstage at the VMA's last year and since then they but also my career had skyrocketed even more. Which was very nice, sure, but it also added a bit more nerves and pressure. Adding to that, I had just released my second studio album which I had not talked in public before. I rubbed my palms over my pants. My eyes trailed nervously through the room I waited for my cue, landing on the large mirror. I got up and carefully pushed untameable curls back. I had them pulled into a tight ponytail, so that they just gently touched my shoulders and wouldn't give me the opportunity to play with it. Which was a nervous habit of mine and my media-trainer had told me many times to stop with it. My critical eyes wandered down my outfit: simple white, double breasted pants which accentuated the waist nicely. The silky tie-neck blouse with the button cuffs was tucked in and the light creamy pink colour went nicely with my hair and the pants. For shoes I had decided on heels, subtle ankle-strap beauties in a nude rose. The whole outfit was elegant but not too muh, still comfortable and pretty much wardrobe malfunction proof.

I snapped up when I suddenly heard Graham's slightly muffled voice saying my name. Carefully I walked towards the door, staring into the still dark hallway towards stage. I had asked for privacy until my cue, means that my manager wouldn't have to stick around please. Just a young woman who had introduced herself as Gracie and would pick me up at my cue, but she wasn't even in sight yet. Graham seemed to simply talk about me to the boys... „She is waiting, yes. Don't worry Harry, we will bring her out soon." Loud laughter and whistling broke out and it swallowed the young mans answer. "So you guys now her? Except for Harry, obviously." Again, muffled laughter. "Yes we know her. As you said correctly, especially Harry. You could say that he's a fan." I heard Liam say, and the crowd awed. I felt my cheeks heating up slightly, a nervous chuckle escaping my lips. "Yeah it's been known..." Harry now said, sounding a bit embarrassed. „She's amazing; I can't blame you Harry. Wonderful voice, and wonderful face!" Graham said. A small smirk stole itself on my lips. "She is." Harry agreed. „She just recently started to follow him on Instagram. The lad almost started to cry." I could heard Louis and the crowd awed again. "I didn't!" Harry exclaimed quickly, embarrassment clearly evident in his voice. "You did. When he heard that she's on show with us, he totally freaked out. Stop lying." I meant to understand the heavy Yorkshire accent of Zayn. "Oh really? Well we can surely get you her number if you want to...or do you want to break into her dressing room...?" Graham jokingly suggested and I grinned. That wouldn't even be too bad...I mean it was Harry Styles. Pretty wonderful boy inside and out, everyone disagreeing was just in denial. Loud laughter was the reaction. "Oh good lord..." I could hear Harry groaning. "Shoot your shot mate!" Louis cheered jokingly, but Harry seemed not to answer anything on it. At least not something I could hear. "She can't hear us, right?" Niall asked and I felt like I could hear him grinning. A shocked gasp from probably Harry was heard. „She can't right?!" he then asked in turmoil, sounding clearly stressed out. Oh if he only knew...In this moment Gracie appeared in the hallway, waving at me. I quickly took a deep breath before mincing nervously towards her. "Wait here." Gracie said with a calming smile, pointing at a corner. The audience was now loud and I could see light falling from on stage into the dimmed hallway. "Well..." I could hear Graham say. „There's only one way to find it out. Please everybody welcome the absolutely gorgeous..." This second Gracie was back, shoving me gently around the corner towards the curtained doorframe. "Watch the step and don't trip. Good luck!" she whispered and I could only quickly thank her before stepping out into the spotlight. The crowd had rose to their feet, as well as Graham and the other guests. Even though the sudden bright light blinded me and prevented me from seeing the crowd in its full number, I could hear how loud it was. There must be many people...Graham rushed towards me in excitement, greeting me how exactly I saw it on the many interviews I had watched on YouTube. "Ooh, ooh it's beautiful to have you!" he said excitedly, smiling bright before embracing me in a hug. Laughing I returned his hug, kissing his cheek softly. „Thank you for having me!" I said loudly, my microphone was now on. I quickly glanced back towards the crowd, seeing now how many faces were watching me. I waved excitedly, a honest smile on my face. The boys were all still standing for me and I quickly turned towards them to greet them. Harry was first in line so I went up to him firstly. The hug was accompanied with loud cheering and I grinned softly. Especially when Harry kept his arms around me a bit longer than I expected him to, but I didn't mind at all. Despite my heels was he taller than me, way broader and smelled exceptionally good. Just as I thought that, I already inwardly scolded myself, even though it was not something unusual to think. I had talked about that with my bestfriend often enough to know that I surely wasn't the only person on earth, to which a good smell was a sign of attractiveness. After maybe five seconds Louis and Zayn started to whistle and Harry let go, his cheeks slightly flushed. Cute, very cute actually. After I hugged Louis, Liam, Zayn and Niall, I froze for a second, not knowing where I should sit. The couch was pretty stuffed already and I had no idea where they wanted me to fit in. But before I could even to start panicking, Zayn and Niall scooted apart and offering me to sit between them. I gave them a thankful smile, trying to sit down as graceful as possible. „So welcome, welcome! How are you feeling?" Graham asked excitedly after everyone had taken their seats again. „Oh I am feeling very well. Was a bit nervous before, but I heard you talking about me so nicely when I was backstage..." I teased, glancing over at Harry, whose face dropped before a smug smirk flit over his lips. The crowd went ballistic at that and Graham chuckled amused. "It's not soundproof then huh." Harry remarked, a hint of a blush on his cheeks. "Nope." I popped the p with a little grin, slowly shaking my head. "Means that your plan on taking her backstage won't quite work now." Louis remarked, a lazy grin on his lips as he leaned back. I laughed out loud like everyone else in the studio. Except Harry of course. He had his face buried in his hands, shaking his head. "Just sod off Louis, sweet Jesus." Graham had his lips pursed, sending him a look. "The right thing to say would've been 'no I wasn't planning on doing anything like that' but you didn't. Does that mean you agree?" Harry just stared at him. "I want to go home, please somebody help." I chuckled amused, scanning the little table for my drink. I had told Graham's manager that I would just like some iced water. When I found it I leaned forwards, at the exact same second as Harry leaned forward to grab his drink. "Look at that...they now act the same. Ladies and Gentlemen we aren't even ten minutes in with our last guest and we already have all this..." Graham struggled to find the correct word, but a smug Louis was quick to help out. "Tension?" he suggested and Graham nodded in agreement. "Exactly, this tension in the studio! Amazing, truly." I felt heat creeping up my cheeks as I shook my head. "Moving on!" I said before taking a big gulp from my water. Everybody chuckled amused and Harry shot me an apologising look. I just shrugged slightly, giving him a warm smile. "Hey, no soul-mate communication here!" Liam exclaimed dramatically and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "Alright, let's not ignore your wish, shall we. How about we talk about your new album?" Graham suggested, immediately inserting the cover shoot of my album. "Called Aubade, I hope I pronounced that correctly. It looks amazing however." Graham said and a agreeing murmur went through the room. "Thank you, and yeah you said that right." Graham tilted his head. "What does it actually mean then?" I sat up straighter, placing my hands neatly on my lap. I was really nervous about talking about the album now. "Well an aubade is a love song, sung at dawn. It's like the contrary of a serenade which is a love song sung during evening twilight for example." Graham's face lit up in understanding. "I feel a bit embarrassed that I didn't knew that but oh well. So what is it all about? I mean there aren't only love songs, just a few actually." I nodded slowly. "Right. It's actually...well its also a very melancholic album. There are many very personal songs on it, very sensitive and not always relying on something positive. But I feel like love isn't always positive as well, so that's quite alright." Graham and the boys wordlessly started to clap after my statement. "Very true. Have you got a favourite song for yourself?" Graham asked and I shrugged. "I don't even know...I mean, I love all of them. I think that it very much depends on the mood you are in." Graham nodded. "Question for the boys; have you listened to the album already? And you don't have to lie." He added playfully and I grinned. "I actually really have. Honestly, I think its pretty bloody brilliant if I may say so." Louis spoke up and I gave him a thankful smile. "Thank you dear." Graham rose a warning finger at me. "Ah Miss, don't you start flirting with Louis, Harry might get jealous." Harry scoffed, looking up in fake annoyance. "God's sake can you lay off of it already!" he sighed and I grinned. "I am sorry darling." I added with a teasing smile, which he returned nonchalantly. "No problem. I, by the way also think that the album is brilliant. I think my favourite song on it is 'minutiae'. It's really beautiful." I gave him a surprised smile. "Really? I like that one as well, greatly. Wonderful song to write and warm your voice up." Harry nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah I can see that." Graham watched up amusedly. "For everyone who hasn't listened to the song yet; does one of you want to explain...?" I exchanged a quick look with Harry. "You do it. I am curious on how you interpret it." I then said, seeing Harry nervously shuffling his feet. "I mean if you like...okay. So in my mind, minutiae is a song about paying attention to the little, more hidden details in life. Like for example the tiny specks of colour in everybody's eyes, or those subtle facial expressions that don't last for a second but still are there. Or maybe the melody of somebody's voice, or how they talk when they are excited about something. Or all those nervous habits you might pick up when you watch closely...I am sorry I trailed off." Harry ended, a slightly embarrassed expression on his face. But I couldn't help but stare at him in adoration. All the things he had mentioned were so true, never had I ever heard someone talking about a song I wrote, recorded with my voice, and being so passionate about it. "Dear good, look at her, completely in awe." Graham laughed amusedly and I quickly hid my face behind my drink. "That was beautiful, exactly like I would've had explained it." His eyes sparkled happily a blissful smile on his lips. "Oh come on lovebirds!" Zayn suddenly exclaimed before he grabbed my your waist and carefully picked you up. He then placed me gently next to Harry, giving us a fake annoyed look. Niall laughed and nudged Harry's shoulder. „A dream came true...and now hug, will you!" he added with a teasing wink. I grinned, feeling very nervous once again. I then slowly and very, very cautious leaned towards Harry who immediately pulled one Arm around me and pressed me against his chest. I giggled and everyone was awing and applauding. Niall coughed, faking a hurt expression „Now, I feel lost. I love you and your music too" he said as, stretching his arm towards me. „Aw no..." I started and reached out to his hand. But Harry snatched it and didn't let go of it. „Nah. Mine." he snapped. Everyone laughed.

#Harry Styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #one direction #one direction imagine #fanfiction #multifandom #I wrote this ages ago sorry if its bad #Niall Horan #zayn mailk #louis tomlinson #liam payne #queue are my sunshine

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loveactionsspeaklouder · 4 years ago

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dangerous love - erling haaland & jadon sancho fanfic

Part 1 - Beginning

Grace had spent the last thirty minutes pacing around the bedroom, within that time she had almost covered every corner nearly five times and changed outfits over three times. It wasn’t that she was nervous about what was happening today; she was more an emotional wreck. She hadn’t been to a football stadium in over a year; after her first and last break-up, Grace promised herself she would leave football behind and she did just that, until now.

Grace didn’t know whether she should be happy or sad about the situation she was in. She had only been living in Dortmund for less than a year and in that time, she had managed to bag herself Borussia Dortmund’s star player as a boyfriend. Jadon Sancho was the rising star of the Bundesliga; he had speed, tricks, goals and most importantly to him, he had Grace.

The two had met a month after she had arrived in Dortmund, a normal night out ended up with the start of a blossoming friendship. That is all that Grace wanted, it was still only a few months since she had her heart broken by the person she trusted the most. But Jadon somehow managed to change the blondes mind, it was a shock to her as well. Now here she was seven months into the relationship and patiently preparing to attend her first Borussia Dortmund home game.

“Babe, are you ready to go?” Jadon called. He entered the bedroom and placed a soft kiss to the forehead of his nervous girlfriend. He had never questioned Grace about her past, she told him what she wanted and he was okay with that. He knew as time went on she would soon fully open-up to him.

“Is it too late to back out? I think I’m coming down with something” she lied. Grace knew Jadon wouldn’t believe her, but it was worth a shot.

“Please Gee, you haven’t been to one of my games yet and you promised!” Jadon pouted. “Just one game then I won’t pester you again, please?”

Grace rolled her eyes. Technically he was correct, she had promised him she would watch a game live but only one. The first step was promising him she would watch a game on TV, she managed to complete that one but she was sure that this one was going to be a lot tougher.

“Fine! One game and that is it. I know I promised you Jay but I’m being serious, I’m not happy doing this” Grace sighed. “I promised myself when I moved here I would leave football alone, you know how much pain it caused me.”

“I know and I totally understand but this time isn’t going to be the same. I promise you I won’t hurt you” Jadon softly smiled. He slowly placed both her small hands in his, gently grazing his thumbs over the top of them. “If you start to feel uncomfortable then you can always leave but you’ll have your family with you so there is nothing to worry about.”

Jadon was right. Grace was thankful that her parents and Emily had agreed to go with her. She had met Emily a few days after she had arrived into the country, she partially blames her for the reason she met Jadon. As she gazed lovingly into her boyfriend’s eyes she realised that this time it would be different, she had grown into a strong woman during the past few months.

“Okay let’s go, don’t want you to be late and we unfortunately miss the whole game!”

“Baby that was amazing, I’m so proud of you!” Grace squealed, she ran as fast as she could leaping into the arms of her sweaty boyfriend who spun her around at a rapid pace. “I think I definitely picked a good game to go to!”

The match had finished 5-0 to Borussia Dortmund, Jadon had scored two goals and got himself an assist. Grace managed to watch the whole game with a smile on her face, she didn’t realise how beautiful the stadium was. The fans spent the entire game singing, chanting and jumping up until the final whistle.

“See I told you it wouldn’t be that bad, I think you might be my lucky charm!” Jadon smirked. It was the best game of his career and it was made even more special that Grace could witness it. “I’m so happy you were there, I could see your cute smile in the stands! So, you coming to the next one?”

“Hang on superstar, baby steps!”

It had been five months since Grace had been to her first and last Borussia Dortmund game live. This wasn’t because she was scared but her own career had started to develop. She had finished her studies and was now working for an interior design company, a passion of hers from a very young age. She was working long hours which meant she had no time to attend the games nor pay attention to news of the club. But this didn’t bother Jadon, he was happy that she was doing something she enjoyed.

Grace finally had a weekend off, she hadn’t told Jadon this but she was going to surprise him at the home game the next day. She decided to treat him with a home cooked meal, she knew he would be exhausted from training. She felt bad that she hadn’t been paying attention to his football, every time they would try to communicate Grace would always be distracted by work, but she promised that this weekend belonged to Jadon.

“Hey, is that my beautiful girlfriend?” Jadon grinned. It was a lovely surprise seeing Grace during the day, he had gotten so used to welcoming her during the night-time. “What did I do to deserve this? It must be Christmas!”

“Oh wow, did you quit your job and become a comedian?” Grace laughed, a little shake of her head when she saw the big grin Jadon was wearing. “I thought because I’m home extremely early on a Friday we could have a movie day and I could cook you a meal?”

“That sounds perfect but I promised some of the guys from the team we could hang this afternoon, but I’m all yours this evening!” Jadon nervously smiled, he knew Grace must have put a lot of effort into organizing the day for them.

“Actually, that’s a better idea because I don’t know what I’m going to cook yet!” Grace giggled. She wanted it to be a special dinner so she needed to prepare, luckily, she knew Jadon would be distracted by his teammates. “Anybody interesting coming over?”

“Yes, Mats is coming over so you can put your tongue back into your mouth!” Jadon glared. He had completed his mission of getting Grace to attend a game, now he had to figure out how to get her to stop obsessing over Mr Mats Hummels. “Just the regulars, Mario, Marco, Roman and some new faces, if you behave I might introduce you to them!”

Grace was preoccupied looking at cooking recipes when the boys arrived. Her attention was soon turned to Jadon who called her over. “Everybody this is my girlfriend Grace, so you can stop with your jokes as you can clearly see she exists!” he laughed. Jadon was excited this moment was finally happening, he had to endure countless jokes about him having a fake girlfriend for weeks. His team mates didn’t think he could be dating someone as smart as Grace.

Grace started introducing herself to everybody, she had learnt so many new names she was sure she would forget them in a few hours. She focused her gaze on Jadon who was talking to a player she hadn’t met yet, he was a lot taller than Jadon with bright blonde hair. She started walking towards him when he began turning around, they were soon facing each other when their eyes met and that was when she realised who he was.

She had once loved gazing into the brilliant blue eyes she now found herself staring at. She had gotten so used to having him around that when he left nearly sixteen months ago, she was left heartbroken. Grace couldn’t believe how quickly he could leave her life, they were only young but they had created a wonderful life together. That day was forever in her mind, it was the main reason she had kept her guard up, she didn’t want to go through that again and here she was staring at the man that gave her that memory.

Grace didn’t realise how long she had been stood staring until she was distracted with Jadon’s hand waving at her. Her attention soon turned to her laughing boyfriend who gave her a small kiss on her cheek before turning around to the blonde-haired boy.

“Grace I’d like you to meet Mr Erling Haaland.”

“Hey Gracie, it’s been a while!”

a.n: i am back!! and i have a new story, it’s only a few parts but i am so excited to share it with you! enjoy x

#erling haaland #jadon sancho #fanfiction #fanfic #football #Borussia Dortmund #norway nt #england nt #Football Fanfiction #imagine #erling haaland imagine #jadon sancho imagine

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