#like damn mc get some standards

[redo-rewind-if]

I’m imagining my MC right now is so stressed out focusing on trying to play 4d time travel chess that they’re barely even registering August’s flirting beyond categorizing it as potentially useful information; at some point he’s gonna do it when they’re not in the middle of a week long panic attack and they’ll abruptly realize 1. what’s happening 2. oh no i’m into it and get super flustered out of nowhere. It’s cute!

Oh absolutely! MC has so much potential to be such an emotional, stressed out wreck that August's flirting isn't even a blip on their radar.

I absolutely love the image of it just hitting them out of nowhere and MC going "wait... no. SHIT!" Your poor MC lol. They're gonna have an interesting time that's for sure.

[leorafts]

Astrology Beauty Notes 💕

Just some personal views/observations about some placement's beauty and impression.

If God desired to crystallize the whole ocean into a small orb, that orb would indeed be Pisces Ascendant/Mc or Neptune prominent people's eyes. There is something in their gaze that causes you to get mislay in them as if you are eyeing a captivating creation of nature. Their eyes can be the mark of serenity and mist.

An individual who doesn't have the standard beauty or the ideal beauty yet still manages to outdo most by their identity and different aura is surely a person with Aquarius/ Uranus prominence.

Ever seen a woman with the appearance of a femme tale who doesn't have Scorpio/Pluto/Lilith prominent? Neither do I. These are some top placements for presumption if a woman is looking like a riddle and intimating while there are also some other placements for it too.

People you have just met but who just feel like home to you and easily became a comfort-giver for you are just some bunch of Cancerians and Moon-prominent people ( with good aspects and placements).

Everything is okay but Mars-prominent people and their muscles. The fire of Mars is just there to enhance their walking s*x allure. They are the most captivating and that redness in them stands for being hot af.

Ever seen a living example of a cottage core well if not yet just see a Taurus / Venus person. Even if they are not particularly interested in that aesthetic, they will surely nail it. Their beauty is natural and effortless, they can look like a character in fiction.

" I am born special; a star and will be till the end of my life, even if you agree or not" - Leo/ Sun prominent people>>>>. Confidence is their beauty.

Juno in-1 house individuals are the ideal wife/husband material. They just give that damn look, the glimpse of living with you till the end of life.

[lynk-zee]

hey lynnie,

Ok so there's this tweet "(my gf can) dress slutty I can fight" by a guy right. I don't necessarily think he means dress slutty on purpose but like if his gf wants to express her fashion in a more sensual way, he supports and defends her right to do so. Could you do a scenario where MC/reader know she looks good and flaunts it and the lads don't mind? They're also willing to step in and remind any entitled creep to stay in their place. I'm really curious to see Rafayel's thoughts on this but all would be great.

“Dress Slutty, I Can Fight.”

Rafayel always wants you to feel good about yourself. He’ll buy you lavish jewelry, designer clothes, and ask you to give him a fashion show so he can see them on you. That being said, fashionable clothes sometimes is less about the type of fabric and more about the lack there of. And he’s here for it! He walks with you on his arm with pride, wearing whatever you want, flaunting your assets, and strutting your stuff. He thinks you’re gorgeous, like a work of art! And art is meant to be admired.

Though, when it comes to creeps checking you out longer than appropriate, he gets a bit protective. If he notices someone checking out your ass in that skimpy little outfit of yours, he cop a squeeze, smirking right at the perp. As if saying “look what I have that you don’t”

If his glare doesn’t deter the creep from looking at you, Rafayel will call him out in front of everyone.

“Do you mind? I know my partners hot as fuck but keep your eyes to yourself, damn!”

Usually it doesn’t escalate from there, the perp feeling thoroughly embarrassed from being called out like that in public. But if it does, Rafayel will handle it.

“It’s okay, babe. I can fight”

Zayne absolutely loves spoiling you with the money he makes as a surgeon. Which mostly consists of clothes! Whatever you want, just point and he’ll get you it every color. Absolutely loves when you dress however you want. His main goal in life is for you to live as comfortably as possible. So if looking all dolled up in pretty makes you happy, go for it!

When you’re dressed up, he’d always have his hand on the small of your back, guiding you this way and that under his careful watch. He’s gotta keep his baby safe. If someone is staring at you for two long, they’d be frozen solid by Zayne’s evol.

Just kidding. More like frozen solid by his icy glare. Much like Rafayel, Zayne would make it public because he knows that most people will get intimidated by a large crowd.

“Could you not stare at my partner? We are trying to enjoy our night out.”

If the creeps too persistent, he’ll clench his jaw and place his jacket on you.

“Sorry, dear— could you give me a moment? That man over there seems like he wants to talk.”

Zaddy

In all seriousness, Zayne really wouldn’t resort to violence because he has standards to uphold. But he definitely would stand his ground and tell the creep off. Your comfort is his utmost priority. He won’t let some filth make you feel self-conscious.

Xavier’s all for your slutty era. You look beautiful, he’s enjoying the view, it’s a win-win in his books. What he doesn’t enjoy is the amount of unwanted attention you garner when you dress up. Yes, it’s not your fault that you’re beautiful, he would never fault you for that. He’s just sick of the guys staring as if they have the right to. Absolutely not.

So, he marks the shit out of you. Your neck is covered in hickeys, branding you as his. They can look all they want, but with his arm around your waist and his marks on your neck, you’re his and his only. Wear less, he doesn’t care. He’ll just make sure his hand print on your ass peaks out from under your shorts.

If it gets too bad, we know Xavier would step in right away to stop it. He’s pretty blunt without meaning to, so when it’s intentional—sorry to any guy who even breathes in your direction. Sometimes you have to step in though because you know it’s game over if Xavier swings. But Xav will always protect you, so dress however you want. He just wants you to be happy.

“Ignore those creeps, my love. I’ll take care of it.

[jazeswhbhaven]

A Christmas Beneath Heaven | React | Days: 1, 2, & 3

Alright ya'll let's see if I can get myself back into the swing of things with this christmas event which has me all over the place so far lmao.

It's funny how the plot is this cold that causes MC to be overly horny because I'm recovering from the flu and all I felt was p a i n and n o s l e e p

I've been liking the format that I've been doing my reacts lately as I think it's a little easier to read? (Ya'll let me know if it is or isn't or no change)

Summary, Screenshots with unhinged reactions, recap and what I think so far

So let's jump in with that!!

What's going AWN?!

We're in Gehenna for Christmas once again, and this time it seems the decor is more traditional to Earth standards instead of what they did in the angel cards.

MC keeps running off somewhere and it's pretty much confusing everyone. There's a point where Leraye and Paimon suspect it's a bathroom issue and Leraye says some crazy stuff like???

Leraye apparently doesn't mind if MC were to go to the bathroom in front of him or fart in front of him and Paimon shuts him up by saying don't reveal your kinks <3 So confirmed Leraye is that boyfriend you can go to the bathroom while he's showering or brushing his teeth. (see screencaps below for receipts)

Well, the matter of the fact is that MC is running off to the bathroom but it's not for that. It's because they literally have to jack off as if they're going through a second puberty (honestly I don't remember being horny in my adolescence at all....I was annoyed by everyone else being horny lmaoooo)

Like we're talkin' there's a scene where they rush off to a bathroom in Hades to touch themselves (in detail) and they can sense Foras is in the bathroom (he is)

MC tries to relieve the issue by visiting different devils, I'm talking like bouncing off to every country to get their mind off it. Eligos, Stolas, Vassago, Morax...it doesn't help at all because they're finding something erotic about them in every way.

MC decides to take it upon themselves to find a sage to help figure out what's wrong with them. And well when we get to who it is??? It's fucking Jjyu in a poorly disguised costume. I cannot make this up like you can tell it's him and it's so funny.

So, facts are his full name is Jjyursei. He only works 9-5 as Belial's voice (does Belial know that? lmao) and he's a part-time sage. Crazy. And he was being so rude as per usual I'm just like....you're the size of a trinket/candy I can flick you across this room.

It's also revealed by Jjyu that MC has been hella touchy, rubbing up on the nobles during battles but it's not like anyone minds it because it helps with "morale" (what kinda bs....LMAO i'm sorry I was expecting them to be focused while fighting) and that seems "normal" but MC swears this is different than before.

So he gives them a thermometer to stuck up their ass, and they are literally losing their mind doing that. They also had to spit in a jar, take off their sock, and Jjyu was smelling the thermometer (W H A T) The results are...their desire is off the charts indicating a "hell christmas cold"

So another cool fact: A devil's first time masturbating generates 100C of heat, first time they have sex it's 200C of heat, MC is currently at 800C (gawd damn, like if that much heat is generated I wonder what keeps MC from burning up having sex unless it's regulated to where it doesn't hurt them)

So Jjyu calls a meeting and all hell is breaking loose lmao. Beel even showed up. (Lucifer did not, probably had something better to do) And after getting glared at and nearly jumped, Jjyu explains that MC has caught the Christmas Cold. Beleth doesn't know what that is (bless him) and Sitri explains that it affects humans much differently, because if it was rampant on Earth it wouldn't just affect sexual desires but other unsavory desires (think: THE PURGE).

Naturally, everyone is trying to figure out what to do to save MC, but there's another matter that gets brought up. Mammon wants to fucking buy the thermometer that was in MC's ass. 💀💀💀💀

Satan is pissed off, saying he's not letting that happen because it's Gehenna property (we know the real reason Satan but it's not like he's lying lol) Levi is upset because he thinks this is interfering with him getting proper context. Beel agrees with Levi and Asmodeus is over here like "oh let's make this a threesome <3"

Asmo. pls.

Belphie oddly is being serious when he wakes up to mention that he's never seen anyone get it. This being true because devils don't repress their desires, but MC has been? (I find that hard to believe based on events...)

(Also some of ya'll may have noticed a pronoun mix up but Satan refers to fem!MC as "that guy") Satan though does bring up that he has to remind MC to give in to their desires, and that's indeed true. We see it happen. So perhaps MC does repress enough for the christmas cold to be that bad.

BUT there's someone else who had it. Solomon himself! He caught it when he first arrived in Hell and it was bad, but it cleared up for him. Beel suddenly orders Bael to go find the devil that treated Solomon and to bring him back (poor Bael)

So now MC is being held in a quaratine room. There's nobles watching them, and apparently MC has been masturbating so much they lost weight. Also, they can't see the nobles through the one-way glass but they can see them....so yeah when MC starts up their self-play the nobles have a front row seat. WHATS CRAZIER is that they start masturbating too????? HELLO??????? (idk to me that's kinda hot not knowing that they're watching)

Also, Sitri being shown to be the favorite....MC is like "I wanna finger his hole" and Sitri is out here about to bust down doors to get in there and Beleth stops him lol (NO LIKE he was literally about to tear things apart to get in that room)

AND now it appears that Bael has found the devil that treated Solomon. WHICHHHHHH we get to see on day 4~

SCREENCAP TIME

They are so damn cute, Paimon likes scritching Ppyong on the belly and I'm like yeahhhh when Juno's around they probs fuckkkkk~

Leraye not beating the allegations of having a bodily function kink....maybe even a fart kink (that's real btw and I've heard of folks making content for it 💀)

First, the bathroom in Hades look nice asf. Second, when I said in detail??? Yeah this is for fem!MC btw even the masturbating descriptions. MC is down bad like?

Yup his freaky ass was there watching lmao. He did say he was always gonna know what MC is doing and I bet he was having a hard time not jacking off

Satan being like-

He hates being interrupted or ignored so I can just hear him being irritated lmao

Eligos the bby~ seeing how he reacts to being touched on his head means he probably gets going by intimate soft touches. He was being so sweet <3 (even though MC was fucking HAVING A NOSEBLEED ALL OVER THE PLACE)

Don't stare at him or he will f i g h t

I find this funny because you can literally just be standing there admiring him and he's like YEAH SQUARE UP. Silly.

Vassago also just staring like ???? I found this funny because he's probably an eater but will we ever find out??? H O P E FU L L Y

Now MC, this was a damn mistake.

Yeah Morax I'mma need you to stick three fingers in and see if you can find that nice spot that makes my brain go brrrrrr. Thank you.

Uh huh....sure. (though I wouldn't mind a little Juno in my life forealllll)

Asmo would have have a field day, I wish they would have went.

Jjyu if you don't get yo-

Okay but same. Barb is rideable

Okay so when do they even have time to do all that? Real talk when the devils are supposed to be fighting 💀💀💀💀💀💀

I can picture the pose, he got that big D energy.

Beel and that nose of his. Don't let him catch you with anything else that has MC's scent on it....we know how he gets

The husband and wife are present <3 Love them.

Mammon be fr right now p l e a s e (wonder how much he'd pay for feet pics or used panties)

Astra's bf's are fighting again <3 (they do this often anyway in their relationship lmao)

Levi don't threaten him with a good time. This also sounds sexual

Asmo being like: sitri you goddamn cockblocking bitch i was trying to get some dick and here you go ruining it

😭🥺

BELETH MY POOKIE

Anddddd we're doneee~

So basically the christmas cold for MC is being very fucking horny to point of masturbating to death so here we go. Sounds like Solomon was just coughing and doing normal shit and then got healed. Levi even brought up that MC isn't the same so that means that Solomon most likely handled this a lot better than MC.

So far this event is hilariously amusing. Like I know folks tend to not like the consistent "MC is down bad" writing but in this instance I'm just finding it entertaining because what do you mean we're sick and masturbating every time we glance at someone? (it reminds me of that one episode of 1000 ways to die where the gf had a disorder where she had multiple orgasms a day just doing regular chores and the guy she was dating got knocked down the stairs during one of her episodes and he died from a broken neck)

ANYWAYS let's see how the other days go from here....I actually had to omit a couple screenshots from my react list but it's f i n e.

Stay tuned~

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

hi hi hello im back with my ‘raidon beef bs!! can i get kieran and mc having some sort of argumentative confrontation when mc first comes to blueberry that almost gets physical before the mc’s alpha koraidon very angrily gets kieran to back off? -🧃

"[Y/n]..."

Looking to Kieran, your eyebrows furrowed at the hateful gaze he was sending you, teeth gnashed together.

You could tell he wanted to desperately say something to you--for having the nerve to show up at his school after what you did to him back in his homeland.

He was shocked that you came to BB Academy at all, before he saw this as his chance to show you how much he's changed and how strong he became. He even permitted you to challenge the Elite Four directly, growing impatient as he was ready finally crush you in-battle.

You, on the other hand, were a bit irritated at this new "persona" of his.

As far as you're concerned, he didn't need to do all of this. He didn't need to be petty and cruel to innocent league club members who don't live up to his standards. He didn't need to dismiss his sister so rudely and act like she once did.

Of course, you feel bad about what happened in Kitakami. Maybe you could've told him about Ogerpon much sooner and let him have a few wins...but this was too much.

Now he was being a straight-up bully. And you utterly despise those types of people.

"You better not go losing to anyone until our battle." Kieran huffed.

"Pssh, like I'd ever lose.." You lightly scoffed, deciding to match his energy.

Although when you looked back at him, you could see a forced grin forming on his face, spreading from ear-to-ear.

It could easily rival a Gengar's.

"Good. I'm not a little kid anymore. And you'll know it when I show you how the best of the best battle." He vowed, turning on his heel and preparing to walk away.

"Kiki!" Carmine gasped in outrage. "You shouldn't talk to [y/n] like that."

You were about to tell her not to intervene, as you didn't wanna see the siblings' relationship fall into further disarray because of this, but what Kieran said next broke the straw on the Numel's back for you.

"Shut it, sis-"

"Look, you can be mad at me all you want. But don't you dare take it out on everybody else."

His scowl deepened as he stared dead straight at you. "What did you say?"

"You heard me. "You stepped closer to him in challenge, fed up with his attitude. "And you're right. You're not a little kid anymore....you're a spoiled little brat who's mad that he didn't get what he wanted. When are you really gonna grow up and stop this charade, huh?"

For a moment he looked genuinely shocked that you're talking to him this way, but then his eyes darkened. "Don't. This isn't some charade. You made me like this-"

"Oh don't give me that. I didn't tell you to act like a bully. You did that to yourself. I was only trying to enjoy a nice trip away from Paldea until you decided to put me up on a pedestal." The words kept spilling out, and you didn't care that he was fuming more and more by the second. "Then you accuse me of ruining your life??"

"Stop it.."

"I get it, you wanna be like me. You wanna do what I can. But at least I don't go around throwing tantrums every time I lose-"

"SHUT UP!! JUST SHUT UP!!" Kieran suddenly turned around, hands grabbing the front of your uniform as he yanked you in close. His eyes were full of rage. "I'm through with being like you...I'm gonna be BETTER THAN YOU IN EVERY WAY!!! AND MAYBE YOU'LL KNOW HOW I FELT!!"

Although his screams initially startled you, and began attracting a small crowd, you tried your best not to show any fear.

But even so, this new side to him was terrifying to witness.

Maybe you pushed his buttons a little too much.

"Get your hands off me, Kieran." You warned firmly, gently grasping his wrists. "This isn't the time or place."

"In case it wasn't obvious, the battle court's right behind us. So it's the perfect place." He snarled. "And since you're so damn confident, maybe we'll just skip the Elite Four and get to the part where I kick--!!"

Before he could finish, one of the pokeballs attached to your belt popped open on its own, and from it emerged...

Koraidon.

Not the one who was your traveling companion who loved sandwiches, but the other member of its species: the alpha, the paradise protection protocol's defender--and now a very pissed off lizard who was able to jump out of its pokeball without your assistance.

Carmine, Drayton, and the other students gasped as it assumed its Apex build and scowled down at the boy, growling.

Suddenly Kieran didn't feel so high and mighty anymore, as he let you go and took a step away. An uncomfortable feeling of smallness and helplessness overtook him upon staring up at the Winged King's hostile gaze, a hand reaching for his Dragonite's pokeball on reflex.

You were stunned this Koraidon came to your defense quicker than the other. It must've somehow sensed the bullying behavior radiating from your rival.

'I guess it takes one to know one..'

The standoff continued for a few more moments...

Before Kieran surrendered.

"Fine. You made your point. The time for our real battle will come." His gaze went to Koraidon, his expression now cold and devoid of emotion. "Don't think you can always jump out to defend [y/n] like this. You'll see who's stronger."

It only snarled in response, while you remained beside it and frowned. "Kieran-"

"Looking forward to seeing you climb the ranks." Was all he said to you before he finally left you alone, the tension in the air still heavy as ever.

"Giiaa.."

"Thanks, buddy." You sighed, smiling a little as you stroked Koraidon's feathers. It relaxed its haunches, putting all four feet back on the ground so you could pet its snout. "Seems you've turned over a new leaf after all."

"Grraah!"

"Yeah..I can only hope he does, too.."

[writingsoftarnishedsilver]

Playing for Keeps | Sebastian Sallow x Reader

Chapter 3

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Words: ~4,600

Tags: Modern AU, Reader Insert, Seventh Year, Female MC, No Y/N, Slytherin MC, Enemies to Lovers, Trope-y, Slow Burn, Humor, Angst, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Romance, Coming of Age, Body Image, High School Drama

The dim light of the Undercroft flickered against the cracked stone walls, the faint hum of bass vibrating in Sebastian’s earbuds. He lounged in his usual spot in the corner, legs stretched out, his wand twirling lazily in his hand. His phone sat face down next to him, mercifully silent. One of the things he loved most about the Undercroft was the lack of reception. No texts, no calls—just uninterrupted solitude.

Well, almost quiet.

A flick of his wand sent another crate hurtling into the far wall, shattering into a satisfying spray of splinters. The rhythmic destruction synced perfectly with the music pounding in his ears. It should’ve been enough to drown out his thoughts, but it wasn’t working.

Instead, his mind kept drifting back to you.

The duel on Monday had been humiliating. He could still hear the collective intake of breath from the crowd when his wand shot from his hand, spinning uselessly though the air and into your outstretched palm. Your expression had been cool, composed—barely a flicker of triumph as you delivered the finishing blow. The fact that you hadn’t gloated afterward made it worse somehow. It wasn’t the sting of defeat that lingered—it was the way you’d stared him down, steady and unapologetic, like beating him had been nothing more than a formality.

He’d been stewing about for days, but the duel wasn’t the only thing that had gotten under his skin.

All damn week you'd been sparring with him—not physically, though he half-wished you had been, just so he’d have an excuse to throw hexes at the smug look on your stupid pretty face. No, it had been verbal sparring, your sharp wit matching his with unnerving precision.

Tuesday, in Potions, he’d made some quip about "ridiculous Beauxbatons standards" when you corrected his stirring technique. Without missing a beat, you’d shot back with a cutting remark about Hogwarts’ apparent leniency in admitting mediocre students.

Wednesday, in Charms, he’d tried needling you again, deliberately taking the spot next to you during a group exercise. His comments had been just loud enough for you to hear, pointed barbs about your "sloppy wandwork". You’d turned to him, your wand poised mid-spell and said, “Coming from the boy whose technique has all the grace of a troll with a toothache? That’s rich.”

And then there was yesterday. Defense Against the Dark Arts. You walked into class wearing that perfectly polished uniform of yours, your crisp white shirt tucked just so, and your tie knotted with what looked like effortless precision. And when Sebastian had muttered something under his breath about Beauxbatons students being “all style and no substance,” you immediately shot back with “Better to have style than to make mediocrity my trademark.” The corner of your mouth had twitched upward, barely perceptible, but it was enough to set his teeth on edge.

And Merlin help him, the attention you were getting from other guys wasn’t helping. He’d watched Everett Clopton linger a little too long at your table in the library on Wednesday, leaning over your shoulder to point at something in your notes. And then there was Arthur Plummly, with his dopey grin and penchant for rambling, who had somehow managed to get you to laugh—really laugh—at one of his terrible jokes in the Great Hall on Thursday.

But the worst of them, by far, was Leander, who had a knack for showing up just when Sebastian didn’t want him to. Like this morning in the courtyard, when Leander had sidled up to you with his usual infuriating confidence, leaning just a little too close as he spoke. Sebastian hadn’t caught the conversation, but he’d seen the faint smile on your lips, the slight tilt of your head as you listened. And when Leander had reached out, brushing a stray thread from your shoulder, Sebastian’s jaw had clenched so tightly he thought his teeth might crack.

A fresh wave of irritation surged through him at the memory, and he flicked his wrist again, sending a stack of books tumbling off the table with a dull thud.

The sound of footsteps approaching cut through the music in his ears, faint but unmistakable against the stone floor. Sebastian sighed, tugging out one of his earbuds. Only one person walked like that, with those annoyingly measured, deliberate steps.

“Not now, Ominis," Sebastian muttered.

“I wasn’t aware I needed an appointment,” Ominis said dryly, his voice cutting through the music. He stopped a few feet away, leaning against the wall as he tilted his head toward Sebastian. “Though judging by the state of this place, I’d say you need more than just an appointment. You need an intervention.”

Sebastian rolled his eyes, slumping further into his chair. “What do you want?”

“To talk about your behavior,” Ominis snapped, his pale eyes narrowing. “Specifically, toward her.”

Sebastian tensed but kept his expression neutral. “I’ve been fine.”

Ominis let out a sharp, humorless laugh. “Fine? Really? Do we need to go over all the shit you pulled this week or can we stop pretending you’ve been fine?”

Sebastian exhaled sharply, his fingers drumming against his thigh. “It wasn’t that bad.”

“Not that bad?” Ominis snapped. “The only time you’ve been remotely civil was when you invited her to Crossed Wands, and since she hasn’t shown up, you’ve been absolutely unbearable.”

“It's not like she’s completely innocent,” Sebastian said defensively. "She gives as good as she gets."

Ominis tilted his head, his pale eyes narrowing in a way that made Sebastian shift uncomfortably in his seat. “She’s only defending herself because you’re going out of your way to provoke her. And everyone’s noticed.”

Sebastian’s scowl deepened. “Everyone?”

“Don't play dumb,” Ominis said coldly. “The entire castle is whispering about how the 'great Sebastian Sallow' can’t seem to keep her name out of his mouth. People are starting to think all your jabs and sneers are just your way of hiding the fact that you fancy her."

Sebastian’s head snapped up. “Fancy her?” He let out a sharp laugh. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Ridiculous? Why?” Ominis pressed, leaning forward slightly. "Because she’s not one of those vapid cheerleaders you usually chase after?”

Sebastian’s grip on his wand tightened, his knuckles white. “Don’t be thick, Ominis,” he snapped, his voice sharper than he intended. “I’m not into… bigger girls.”

The moment the words left his mouth, he wanted to take them back. They tasted bitter, like bile rising in his throat, and they felt wrong—so wrong. But it was out there now, hanging in the air between them, and he couldn’t unsay it.

But Ominis didn’t flinch, didn’t even blink. He simply tilted his head, his expression carefully neutral in a way that made Sebastian’s skin crawl. “Liar,” Ominis said softly.

Sebastian bristled, his jaw tightening as he stared down at the floor in front of him. “I’m not lying,” he shot back, though the words came out hollow and weak.

Ominis snorted, the sound filled with disbelief. “You are. And for what? Because you’re embarrassed?

Sebastian flinched, his jaw clenching as Ominis’s words struck a nerve. “Drop it, Ominis,” he muttered, his voice low and warning.

Ominis raised an eyebrow, his expression unreadable but clearly unimpressed. “You've been staring at her all week. Don't think I haven't noticed.”

Sebastian scoffed, leaning back in his chair as though he could physically distance himself from the conversation. “I wasn’t staring.”

Ominis’s lips twitched into the faintest semblance of a smirk. “You were.”

Sebastian ran a hand through his hair, his frustration bubbling to the surface. “Even if I was staring, which I’m not, it doesn’t mean anything. She’s infuriating and entirely too full of herself, and she’s just… she’s annoying.”

Ominis tilted his head slightly, his pale eyes narrowing with an almost predatory sharpness, as though he was dissecting every syllable. “You mean she’s strong, talented, and doesn’t put up with your nonsense? Yes, I can see how that would bother you.”

Sebastian shot him a withering look. “Don’t twist my words.”

“I don’t need to twist them,” Ominis replied smoothly. “You’re doing a fine job of tying yourself into knots all on your own.”

Sebastian exhaled sharply, pushing himself up from his chair in one fluid motion. He began pacing the length of the Undercroft, his wand twirling absently between his fingers. “She doesn’t act like anyone else here. She doesn’t belong.”

“Doesn’t act like anyone else?” Ominis repeated, arching an eyebrow. "Ahhh. I understand now."

Sebastian froze mid-step, turning to glare at him. “Understand what?”

Ominis’s smirk was faint but unmistakable. “Why she’s gotten so deeply under your skin.”

Sebastian scoffed, his frustration bubbling over. “That’s not what I said.”

“No, but it’s what you meant,” Ominis said, his tone maddeningly calm. “You can’t stand that she’s not fawning over you, not bending to your charm or playing your games—it bothers you.”

Sebastian groaned, raking both hands through his hair as he resumed pacing. “That’s not it. She’s just... She’s so bloody arrogant! Every time she opens her mouth, it’s like she’s trying to one-up me.” He stopped pacing, gripping his wand so tightly his knuckles turned white. “And what does it matter if I looked at her once or twice? She was probably doing something stupid.”

Ominis folded his arms across his chest as though settling in for a particularly amusing show. “Once or twice? Please, Sebastian. You’ve been watching her like a hawk. It’s a wonder you don’t walk into walls.”

Sebastian’s cheeks flushed, a rare heat rising to the surface that he couldn’t quite suppress. “I have not—”

“You have,” Ominis interrupted, his tone clipped but unrelentingly calm. “And you act like a complete idiot every time she’s around. It doesn’t take a genius to see what’s happening."

Sebastian hated this. Hated how easily Ominis could dismantle him with a few well-placed words. Hated how his friend’s sharp intuition made him feel exposed, vulnerable in a way he didn’t know how to handle. But most of all, he hated how much truth there was in what Ominis was saying.

“Are you done psychoanalyzing me?” Sebastian snapped, crossing his arms over his chest.

Ominis chuckled softly, his head tilting. “Not quite. I find this whole thing fascinating. In all the years I’ve known you, I can’t recall a single time a girl’s managed to live rent-free in your head like this.”

“She’s not living rent-free in my head,” Sebastian shot back, his voice a little too loud to be convincing.

Ominis straightened slightly, his expression shifting from teasing to mock-serious. “What happened to all that practiced charm, Sebastian? The smooth lines, the effortless charisma? It's like you’ve reverted to the emotional maturity of a thirteen-year-old. Being mean to the girl you like? Really? How utterly... unevolved.”

“For fuck's sake, Ominis, I don’t like her,” Sebastian ground out, his voice tight.

Ominis arched an eyebrow. “You’re right. You don’t like her—you’re obsessed with her.”

Sebastian froze, his jaw tightening as he tried to come up with a retort. But nothing came.

Ominis chuckled softly, shaking his head. “Well, as entertaining as this little therapy session has been, I didn’t come down here just to help you sort out your love life.”

Sebastian shot him a glare, his expression hardening. “Good, because I don’t need your help.”

“Clearly,” Ominis replied dryly, a faint smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. “But no, I’m here because the rest of us are heading to The Three Broomsticks for dinner. I came to collect you.”

Sebastian paused mid-step, his brow furrowing as he mulled over the invitation. His first instinct was to refuse—he wasn’t exactly in the mood to deal with Imelda’s endless teasing or Garreth’s over-the-top antics. But something stopped him, a faint flicker of curiosity gnawing at the back of his mind.

“Is… she going?” he asked, his voice almost hesitant.

Ominis’s smirk deepened, and though his pale eyes couldn’t see the way Sebastian stiffened, his tone was sharp with amusement. “Chouette? Yes, of course she’s coming. Imelda invited her, naturally.”

Sebastian groaned internally, running a hand through his hair as he weighed his options. It wasn’t as if he could avoid you forever. Still, the thought of sitting across from you, your sharp tongue ready to cut him down if he stepped out of line, made him hesitate.

“Well?” Ominis prompted, tilting his head. “Are you coming, or should I tell them you’re busy sulking?”

Sebastian scowled. “I’m not sulking.”

“Of course not,” Ominis said, his smirk widening. “You’re just… reflecting.”

With a long, reluctant sigh, Sebastian flicked his wand toward the scattered debris in the room, muttering a spell to tidy up the splinters and books he’d strewn about. “Fine,” he said, his tone sharp. “But if you so much as breathe a word about this conversation to anyone, I’ll hex you into oblivion.”

Ominis held up his hands in mock surrender, his expression impossibly smug. “Not a problem. Now come on."

Sebastian followed Ominis out of the Undercroft. The conversation they’d just had lingered like an annoying itch in the back of Sebastian’s mind, but he pushed it aside, focusing instead on the growing din of chatter and footsteps as students made their way out of the castle toward Hogsmeade.

Ominis walked ahead with his usual effortless grace, his posture straight and composed. Sebastian’s gaze drifted to his friend’s outfit, a navy button-down tucked neatly into dark slacks. There was always an effortless elegance to Ominis—an innate sense of poise and precision that Sebastian had long since given up trying to emulate.

He frowned, glancing down at his own attire—grey sweatpants that were just a bit too loose around the waist, paired with a faded Joy Division T-shirt. His sneakers, scuffed from countless treks across the grounds, completed the look—or rather, the lack of one.

He grimaced.

“Something wrong?” Ominis asked, his voice light with amusement.

Sebastian straightened, forcing an air of nonchalance. “No,” he said flatly. "Just wondering why you’re trying to make the rest of us look bad.”

Ominis turned his head slightly, a knowing smirk tugging at his lips. “It’s called making an effort, Sebastian. You might want to try it sometime.”

Sebastian grunted in response, shoving his hands into his pockets as they descended the steps leading to the main entrance. A few groups of students passed by, their laughter filling the air. His mind wandered back to you, as it frustratingly had a habit of doing lately. He remembered your sharp eyes flicking over his Smiths tee that first night, your smirk as cutting as your remark about him trying to look “deep and brooding.” He was sure you'd have another comment lined up when you saw him this time.

Soon enough, the Three Broomsticks loomed ahead, its windows glowing invitingly. The muffled sounds of lively conversation spilled out each time the door opened, and Sebastian could already make out Imelda’s laugh among the crowd.

Ominis slowed his pace, turning his head slightly toward Sebastian. “Try not to make a scene,” he said, his voice low but firm. “You’ve already given everyone enough to talk about this week.”

Sebastian bristled but nodded, biting back a sarcastic comment.

As they stepped inside, the familiar scent of butterbeer and roasted food filled the air. Sebastian’s gaze swept the room, quickly landing on the group’s usual corner table. Imelda, Garreth, and the others were already there, and—

You.

You were leaning forward on your elbows, laughing softly with Garreth, your voice cutting through the warm hum of the pub. Gone was the Beauxbatons poise he was used to seeing—your usual immaculate look now replaced by something entirely different.

You were wearing an oversized band tee—The Cure, he realized with a jolt—and black jeans that hugged your figure in all the right ways, making it impossible for him to look away, even though he damn well tried. Scuffed sneakers tapped in time with the music that thumped through the pub.

And then you pushed up the sleeves of your shirt, casually exposing the tattoos inked along your forearms. Sharp, intricate lines traced the length of your skin, telling stories he couldn’t quite piece together but wanted to know. The sight sent a jolt through him, his stomach flipping in a way he didn’t want to examine too closely. Of course. Of course, you’d have tattoos. Of course, your style would mirror his own, as if you’d stepped straight out of a reflection of everything he liked.

“You’re blocking the doorway," Ominis’s voice broke through his thoughts, dry and pointed.

Sebastian blinked, realizing he’d stopped dead just inside the entrance. He cleared his throat and stepped aside, running a hand through his hair in a futile attempt to compose himself.

“You're acting like she's sprouted a second head,” Ominis chuckled as they made their way toward the table.

Sebastian shot him a glare but didn’t respond.

As they neared the group, Imelda glanced up first, her grin wicked. “Well, look who decided to show up. What took you so long, Sallow? Still licking your wounds from that duel on Monday?”

“Good to see you too, Reyes,” Sebastian quipped, finding a place at the far end of the table—conveniently as far away from you as possible. He busied himself by grabbing a menu, using it as a shield to block out the sight of you.

“Hello, Sallow,” came a voice from across the table. Sebastian glanced around the menu to find Leander smirking at him, pint of beer already in hand. “Fancy a drink?”

The tension was immediately palpable, a charged undercurrent that neither bothered to mask.

Their rivalry wasn’t new.

Sebastian and Leander were opposites in style but equals in presence, two sides of the same coin. Fire and Ice. Sebastian, Slytherin's star Quidditch Beater and school dueling champion, with his rumpled style and sharp edges. Leander, polished and preppy, the Summoner’s Court star, always impeccably dressed and composed. And to each other's chagrin, both knew how to charm their way into hearts and, more often, beds. It was an unspoken game between them, a constant measuring of egos and victories.

Sebastian hesitated for a moment before nodding, dropping the menu and leaning over as Leander slid an extra pint his way. “Why not?” he muttered, taking the glass and letting the cold condensation cool his fingers.

Leander took a swig of his beer, his smirk widening as he leaned in conspiratorially. “So,” he started, his tone already suggesting trouble. “What’s the deal with you two?”

Sebastian tensed, immediately knowing who Leander was referring to but feigning ignorance. “Who?”

Leander gestured subtly with his head toward your end of the table, where you were chatting with Garreth and Imelda, your laughter carrying lightly over the ambient noise of the pub. “Chouette.”

“There’s no deal,” Sebastian replied flatly, taking a sip from his pint. “Why?”

Leander raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. "You’ve been staring at her all week like she’s a bomb you’re trying to defuse.”

Sebastian’s grip on his glass tightened slightly, but he forced a casual smirk. “You’re imagining things.”

“Right,” Leander drawled, dragging out the word. “Well, if there’s nothing going on, I might just try my luck.”

Sebastian’s jaw twitched and Leander’s grin turned sly, his pint dangling lazily from his fingertips. “Doesn’t seem like your usual type, anyway, does she? You’ve always gone for the willowy ones.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “But Merlin’s beard, Sallow. That figure? The tattoos? The piercings? Sexy as hell.” He tilted his head, the grin widening. “And sharp as a whip, too. She doesn’t take your shit for a second, does she?”

Sebastian’s grip on his drink tightened, his knuckles whitening slightly. He took a deliberately long sip, the bitterness of the beer doing little to mask the irritation curling in his chest.

Leander seemed to pick up on the subtle shift in Sebastian’s demeanor and leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial murmur. “Tell you what,” he said, his grin turning sharper. “How about a little wager? Fifty Galleons. First one to bed her wins. No harm done—it’s her choice anyway, isn’t it?”

Sebastian stiffened, though he shouldn’t have been surprised by Leander’s proposition—after all, their reputations certainly didn’t put them far above such things.

But even for Sebastian, there were lines he didn't cross. And something about the way Leander framed it—reducing you to nothing more than a prize to be won—felt wrong. Low. But that sting of pride, that unwelcome prick to his ego at the thought of letting Leander bloody Prewett swoop in unchallenged, was hard to ignore. So instead of declining, he leaned back, smirking faintly, falling back into the role everyone expected him to play.

“Fifty Galleons, huh?” he said, his tone light, almost amused. “You’re on.”

Leander grinned, thrusting out a hand. “Shake on it?”

Sebastian hesitated for half a heartbeat before extending his own hand, gripping Leander’s firmly. “Deal.”

The shake lasted only a moment, but as Sebastian pulled back, a flicker of regret twisted in his chest. If you ever found out about this, you’d probably hex them both where they stood.

But his pride wouldn’t let him back down. And besides, it wasn’t like anything would come of it. Right?

Sebastian barely had a moment to process the knot of unease in his chest before Imelda’s voice rang out, sharp and teasing.

“Oi, Sallow,” Imelda called from down the table, her tone carrying that trademark teasing lilt. “Let me guess—another edgy thrift store find?”

Sebastian blinked, momentarily thrown off. He glanced at her, then followed her gaze to his shirt, the faded logo emblazoned across the chest. His smirk flickered back into place. “Jealous, Reyes?”

Imelda rolled her eyes, turning toward you. “Chouette, what do you think? Does our dear Sebastian look like he’s auditioning for a muggle garage band, or is this more ‘serious artist’ territory?”

All eyes turned to you, and for a fleeting moment, Sebastian braced himself. You could easily take Imelda’s bait, throw a scathing remark his way, and earn another round of laughter at his expense. But instead, your expression softened slightly, and you gave a casual shrug.

“I mean,” you said with a casual shrug, gesturing to your own outfit, “we’re basically wearing the same thing, aren’t we? Not like I’ve got room to judge.”

The group stilled briefly, the surprise palpable. Even Sebastian blinked, caught completely off guard by your measured response.

You continued, your tone edged with self-awareness. “I shouldn’t have sunk to his level with those comments I made before—that was petty. It’s not like I’m the authority what people can or can’t wear… even if my read on Sebastian’s absolutely dazzling personality was spot on.”

The table erupted in laughter and Sebastian’s lips twitched, caught between a scowl and a reluctant smile. You hadn’t gone for the easy dig, but you’d still managed to keep your edge intact. It was infuriating. And impressive. Like you’d gotten the better of him again without even trying.

Garreth leaned forward, gesturing toward Sebastian with his pint. “In his defense,” he said, “he does actually listen to the bands on his shirts. Big muggle music fan. It’s honestly kind of annoying—he zones out completely with his earbuds in and taps his quill like mad when we’re trying to study in the library.”

The group chuckled, and Sebastian smirked, clearly unbothered. He raised his pint in a toast to Garreth. “Always nice to have a character witness, Weasley.”

You tilted your head slightly, your eyes sharpening with curiosity as you turned toward Sebastian. “What’s your favorite song right now?”

He blinked, the earnest question catching him off guard. He set his pint down as he considered you for a moment. “Uh... maybe 505 by the Arctic Monkeys.”

Your eyebrows lifted, and then you let out a quiet laugh, shaking your head. “You’re like a 2014 Tumblr girl.”

Sebastian frowned, his confusion evident. “A what?”

Realizing your slip, you hesitated, your cheeks flushing slightly. “Never mind,” you said quickly, waving a hand as if to brush it off. “I grew up with a muggle mum, so I guess it’s… it’s one of those references that doesn’t really translate.”

Poppy perked up, leaning forward with interest. “What’s Tumblr?”

You sighed, clearly debating how much to explain. “It’s… kind of like a chaotic... online scrapbook,” you said, your tone sheepish. “Back in 2014, it was all about indie bands, angsty quotes, and aesthetics. The Arctic Monkeys were a big deal on there. So were flower crowns, oddly enough.”

Sebastian leaned forward slightly, resting his arms on the table, a smirk tugging at his lips. “So maybe my taste isn’t so questionable after all.”

Before you could answer, proprietress of the Three Broomsticks, Sirona Ryan, swept over to the table. "Evening, folks. Same as usual for most of you, or are we branching out tonight?"

The group quickly ordered, everyone going for their favorite pub classics from shepherd’s pie and beef stew to fish and chips. All the while, Sirona nodded along, her quill scratching against the notepad. Then her gaze shifted to you, her smile softening. “Ah. There's a face I haven't seen before. What can I get you?”

Sebastian glanced up at you instinctively, watching as you smiled politely at Sirona, your tone light. “Just a house salad, please."

A salad? While everyone else was diving headfirst into comfort food? Sebastian didn’t say anything, but the choice stuck with him, a faint itch at the back of his mind.

Garreth leaned across the table, his grin sharp. “Fancy a game of darts, Sallow? Or are you scared to lose?”

Sebastian smirked, grateful for the distraction. “To you? Not a chance.” He stood and followed Garreth to the dartboard, grabbing a set of darts as the rest of the group’s chatter faded into the background.

He lined up his first shot, locking onto the bullseye. Darts was his game—Garreth was usually no competition. Tonight should’ve been no different.

But as he drew back his arm, his eyes flicked to the table.

You were laughing at something Imelda said, your shoulders shaking, fingers tracing the rim of your glass. The warm light highlighted the numerous silver rings and studs lining your ears, the strands of hair framing your face. You looked... disarmingly perfect.

His rhythm faltered and the dart veered wide, hitting the board with a weak thunk far from its target.

Garreth burst into laughter, nearly doubling over. “Merlin’s beard! Did you forget how to aim?”

“Shut it, Weasley,” Sebastian muttered, grabbing another dart.

He refocused, narrowing his gaze on the bullseye. Focus. Just throw.

Then you stretched casually, arms over your head, the hem of your band tee lifting just enough to reveal a sliver of skin. His hand twitched, and the dart flew early, landing on the edge of the board.

Garreth howled, slapping the wall. “What is going on with you? Are you trying to throw the game?”

“I’m just warming up,” Sebastian snapped, his ears burning. He grabbed his final dart, determined to salvage what was left of his pride.

Garreth stepped back, smirking. “Sure, mate.”

Sebastian lined up, blocking out the noise. Just throw the damn dart. But as he prepared to release, you glanced his way, your curious expression sending his nerves spiraling.

The dart hit the board—barely—scoring a handful of points.

Garreth clapped him on the back, grinning. “Losing your edge, Sallow.”

Sebastian leaned against the wall, arms crossed, scowling. “Just finish your turn.”

Garreth, unbothered, hit near-perfect throws, finishing with a triumphant smirk. “Better luck next time, mate.”

Sebastian waved him off, muttering about distractions, but the truth gnawed at him. It wasn’t Garreth, the noise, or even the game.

It was you.

 ← Previous Chapter Next Chapter →

[demonlovingsheep]

Which brother has the highest kill count in Obey Me? How and why they kill? This is what I think:

Lucifer. He is very strict, prideful, and very powerful. He caused the most casualties in the Celestial War no doubt. In the beginning of his demon years, lower demons would purposely get in his way to challenge him. The first one who tried did not live to tell the tale. The second one follows the fate of the first one. One by one, thousands by thousands would continue to increase Lucifer’s body count to the millions until lower demons finally got the message that he is not to be messed with. As for human casualties, I doubt there is a lot since he doesn’t like the taste of human flesh. If he was summoned by a cult or something, he is going to have fun manipulating those foolish souls. After all, he is a sadist.

Beelzebub. He is Lucifer’s body guard in the Celestial Realm, a Cherub that is one of the highest in terms of rank. Due to his strength, he can easily crush his opponents. When he became a demon, all his victims became his meal during his hunger rampage. His sin took full control of his body in the beginning and most of the time he wouldn’t know what’s happening until one of his brothers stops him or he has no other food source available. He probably does the same up in the human world when summoned by a cult if they don’t offer him a big enough meal as offering, then they become the meal themselves. When MC meets him in the original timeline, he still tries to eat us and we’re not allowed to sleep or be near him without another brother’s supervision. Even the brothers were afraid one of their toes was gonna be bitten off.

Leviathan. “Keep sending your soldiers. The ocean has plenty of space before it run out of gravesites for your people.” He controls the ocean, just sends out a tsunami or two and wipes every being away and let the corpse fall to the bottom to be eaten. Even if the victim has the ability to breathe underwater, he would summon Lotan to obliterate them. He never has to get handsy to increase his kill count. He does snack on a couple of humans that've been swept into the ocean by currents.

Satan: He unleashed hell when he was born, being the embodiment of wrath itself. He was separated from Lucifer and his other brothers when they fell. Since there is no one strong enough to hold him back, he wreaked havoc on anything and everything. He set the area around him into a green fire graveyard until he was eventually found and gets chained and shoved in a locker. He gets ticked off when summoned, and if it was for a stupid reason. If they mistaken him for Lucifer, which is pretty often, no one would live to tell the tale. It took decades for them to learn that he is not that damn arrogant bastard.

Asmodeus: Personally, I was conflicted between him and Mammon, but Asmodeus can snap more easily than Mammon. Even though he is the avatar of lust, he still has standards and boundaries. Most lower demons think he is easy to manipulate. Just compliment him, take him to a motel or bar, and get him when he’s vulnerable. The thing is that Asmo knows, and he has his own wicked plan in mind. Depending on his mood, he can either toy with the other demons for such a long time that the other demon will actually develop some feelings for him, all for it to crumble in the end. Like a heartbreak, but with their hearts literally removed and in Asmodeus’s hands. Asmo will still laugh and feign innocence like he hadn’t just gone sicko lover mode. Or he just snaps and completely loses it, charming the other person to bash their own skull against a wall until they are dead. He still refuses to get his clothes or nails stained.

Mammon: He wasn’t initially greedy, but he slowly grew to be the Avatar of Greed as he is. Mammon perhaps fakes his personality, just like how Satan would cover up his wrath with a smile. After all, how would one approach to make a business if he gives off a threatening aura. Maybe centuries as a shady business demon made him lose his sense of dignity along the way, but keep in mind he still knows his title as an Avatar. He flaunts it too, it’s just that it’s very hard to push him to the point of violence. So most demons don’t take him seriously. Money makes the world go round, but it’s the quickest way for someone to seek vengeance when someone doesn’t pay back what they own. Mammon generally plays by the rules even though he himself gambles in illegal places, but he still has business standards. If someone tries to cheat him out of his winnings, they will earn themselves a one way ticket to Mammon’s blacklist, which most of the time has four or five people in the waiting list so one shouldn’t count on time to delay Mammon’s wrath. He will make them pay. No amount of begging or bribery will work, by then the only way of paying back the “debt” is with one’s soul, which is worth even more than anyone can ever imagine. Hell, perhaps he deals with selling organs on the black market too after he finishes seeking vengeance. Organs are worth a good amount of money, either for hungry cannibalistic demons looking for a demon kidney as dinner or for mad scientist demons to run experiments on. Either way, business.

Belphegor: He is too lazy to kill, that’s all I can say. If you think it’s hard to get on Mammon’s blacklist, it’s even harder to get on Belphegor’s blacklist because he just doesn’t care…unless someone messes with his dear twin, Beelzebub. There will be no more peaceful rest for that person for the rest of their short life because Belphegor will make sure that they die in agony. He will curse the person so that whenever they are about to fall asleep, they will be jolted alive by some weird electric feeling. It’s like the feeling when you trip in your sleep (Hypnic Jerk), except it’s not an angel accidentally dropping your soul when bringing you to heaven, but a demon draining your sanity to live. It’s no brainer that sleep is very important as it keeps one’s mind and body functioning. For the victims of Belphegor however, they will never sleep again. They can try but are always jolted awake whenever they are on the edge to dreamland. Until many days has gone by where the person is basically a walking zombie at this point, they pray and try to fall asleep once again expecting for the same jolt feeling, except it didn’t happen. The victims can finally sleep, but this sleep feels more…permanent.

Author’s note: I started writing this draft like a year ago, and took it out today. I forgot what im exactly writing. It’s so shifty of what it’s meant to be. Think it was kill count and why, but it gradually moved onto killing methods of each. Don’t take it too seriously 👉👈. Hope y’all enjoy.

[carionto]

Predator mode

Big Thrasher was not a happy camper after his first encounter with Humanity. There is a certain exponential curve to simple ballistic weapons, whereas shields, which start off way above, progress on a geometric line. E in = E out (mostly, some charge is lost in conversion) vs E=MC^2. He learned that the hard way when three of his toughest cruisers were reduced to space dust by, as he later learned to his horror, a mid-sized transport ship using Human standard issue rail cannons.

Someone smart would move on and avoid Humanity. Big Thrasher isn't a complete idiot, but he is a prideful and narcissistic pirate captain. Thus his ability to make sensible decisions is handicapped severely. Now he has made a most dubious one indeed:

Infiltrate a Human science station and steal all their secrets and use them to get sweet, juicy, delicious revenge!

Finding one was disturbingly easy, there's so many of them. Like, at least one for each star system within eighty light years from Sol, one for each planet within thirty, and then it just gets ridiculous within Sol itself. Oddly enough, despite their size, typically there are no more than ten people aboard, almost all Human, only a few are joint Coalition.

Thinking long and hard (something Big Thrasher is not a fan of) he decided on his target - a lone station on the very outskirts of publicly known Human activity and furthest away from any major Coalition systems.

When his reconstructed fleet arrived behind the local gas giant, the station was sitting in mid orbit of the inner rock planet and was broadcasting something strange on open channels - a melodic chant of sorts:

"..live on a Yellow Submarine! A Yellow Submarine! A Yellow Submari.."

whatever that meant. No matter, Big Thrasher's fleet was moving in on the target, stealth drives on, weapons ready, numbers on their side, element of surprise - the perfect ambush.

...

Where did the station go?

Before Big Thrasher could register neural activity to try and answer that, it appeared. Behind them. And a small explosion happened moments earlier where it used to be, but the main concern was the station firing its stabilizer thrusters to rotate it at incredible speeds, then a long blade slicing one of his ships in two. Then it disappeared again. And another small explosion.

Once more, it suddenly reappeared behind another one of his ships and did the same thing, but this time used its thrusters to quickly move towards the vessel and impale it on a massive spike. Disappear. Small explosion in its place.

Three. Four. Five. They're losing ships by the second. A literal space station sized target and they can't keep track of it, let alone land a single hit. How is it teleporting? What are those explosions?

WHY IS A SPACE STATION ENGAGING HIS PIRATE SPACE SHIP FLEET IN MELEE COMBAT!

WHY WOULD ANYONE THINK TO DO THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE!?!

WHY IS IT WINNING!?!??!

Big Thrasher once again order an emergency retreat, what remained of his fleet scattered to randomly selected quick hyperjump coordinates, and would regroup in a few weeks time.

_______________________

Aboard the experimental development station Tree of Grating Whispers the crew of seven were hastily putting out fires and trying not to throw up from all the gee forces they just endured, kinetic dampeners be damned.

A few hours later, all in their environmental suits, as the life support system was dead, they convened for an after-action report:

"Right, so, good news and bad news. Good news - short range teleporter works perfectly. Bad news - each unit doesn't teleport with us and just explodes, further data has been unrecoverable so far.

Good news - rapid action thruster and kinetic combat mode works. Bad news - can't have biologicals onboard and even moderately durable systems break after a few swings.

Overall, I'd say this has been a success (unanimous nodding). Let's get to working out the kinks and we'll have a presentable version for the military. We'll also have to thank those pirates for not masking their engine heat trails, this was a great field trial guys, real proud of everyone!"

The chief says, while high on painkillers (and so is the rest of the crew), as another part of the station self-immolates.

[sashaisready]

This Must Be The Place: Chapter 8 - Born with a weak heart

Biker!Bucky x Femme Reader

Back at your beloved late grandmother's home to pack up her house, you have a run-in with the town's biker gang 'The Howling Commandos' and find yourself entangled with the metal armed President.

Series Masterlist

Warnings: Just smut! a smidge of reader insecurity

I'm back! Onto the smut. I'm sure this new arrangement won't come back to bite anyone in the ass...

(gif doesn't represent how reader looks)

The make-out session continued, at some point Bucky even managed to unhook your bra without you noticing until your straps began falling down your shoulders.

You gave him a little teasing smack on the chest as you continued to kiss him. “Bad boy,” you whispered as you struck him lightly.

“You know full well saying stuff like that is only going to encourage me,” he grinned devilishly as he pulled you into him and deepened the kiss.

“Friends don’t do this…” you protested futilely as he began to kiss the column of your neck.

“I dunno…this feels pretty friendly to me,” he chuckled as you could practically feel his wicked smile against your skin.

Every red flag was waving, every warning deep in your gut was screaming at you, but you were unable to stop. He was like a drug, and you couldn’t resist coming back for another hit. You told yourself it would be fine…after all, this was the perfect solution, right? No attachments…no drama…just a little fun while you were in town. That’s all.

Right?

As your inner monologue spiralled and you tried to (unconvincingly) assure yourself you had everything in hand, Bucky surprised you by picking you and raising you above him. You squawked at the sudden change of pace as he manoeuvred himself out of the passenger seat and into the driver’s, placing you down in the passenger seat where he’d been. He grabbed the keys and nonchalantly tossed them from one hand to the other, then started the engine.

“Bucky…what the f-,” you scoffed in disbelief.

“Taking you to my place,” he replied cutting you off as he began reversing out of the lot, his hand pressed against your headrest as he looked over his shoulder.

“Excuse me??” you replied shrilly.

“What? We can go to your place if you like…just figured it might be weird as it’s your grandma’s and all”.

“Very presumptuous to assume I want to go back to either,” you jibed.

He shrugged as he pulled out onto the road. “Do you not…?”

“…I mean I do. Yeah. But I don’t like you assuming,” you admitted stubbornly. “…And I didn’t give you permission to drive Sally”.

“I’m a very careful driver. And Sally is fine with it, aren’t you girl?” he cooed as he patted the dash.

You looked over at him from and could see he was grinning. Like the cat who got the damn cream.

“Fine,” you sighed, admitting defeat. “But your place better be nice. I have standards, you know”.

“Of course, Sugar. Don’t you worry, you’ll get the full VIP treatment. Guest of honour”.

*

Twenty minutes later you found yourself on Bucky’s bed, your shirt buttons undone and your jeans half off.

It had all happened so fast.

He had driven you back to his place (in your car) and practically ripped you through the front door. Turns out he had an apartment above the auto shop the MC owned. It was…surprisingly nice. You had expected half empty beer bottles and motorcycle grease…but it was…neat. Monochromatic furnishings and stripped back wooden floors. Nicely framed bike prints adorned the walls. As long as you didn’t think about how many girls had likely crossed that same threshold…it was pleasant.

“Don’t look so surprised, Sug,” he had ribbed as you took in the space. “I’m not some frat boy. I take care of my things”.

“Is that so?” you challenged, raising an eyebrow as his hand found your lower back.

“Oh yes,” he purred as he pulled you into him. “I’m very much a man, not a boy”.

“Big boy, huh?” you giggled as that dangerous mouth of his moved to your ear.

“You’ll find out…”

And then your earlobe was between his teeth, and suddenly you were both on his bed and both his and your jeans had been unzipped. And you knew it would all come back to bite you hard in the ass - but you were unable to swim against the current, so you just let yourself drift with the stream.

He yanked at your top, pulling it over your head and discarding it onto the floor. Your bra quickly followed suit and he took a second to admire your now revealed breasts, looking at them with a degree of awe as you felt your face flush at the intensity of his attention. You instinctively went to cover them with your hands, not used to being looked at like that, but he frowned and ripped your fingers away as if you’d greatly insulted him. He took one of your breasts in his mouth and gently the caressed the other with his hand, and you laid back and mewed as his tongue danced along the bud of your nipple.

“Beautiful,” he muttered as he kissed you on the mouth once more.

As the two of you kissed you tugged on his t-shirt, signalling that you wanted it off. He enthusiastically obliged and you helped him pull it over his head. You nearly gasped at the sight of his bare chest, taut and wide and impossibly sculpted. An MC tattoo adorned one of his pecs. He watched your face carefully as you soon found the scar tissue where flesh met metal, a stark reminder of his trauma and his past. You thought you saw a moment of anxiety in his otherwise ravenous eyes. Unflinchingly, you ran your fingers over the still-angry red welts where they jarringly swam into metal. You tenderly kissed the scars and across the cool steel and turned your face back to his.

“So are you”.

That glimpse of apprehension in his eyes or whatever it was suddenly disappeared forever. He smiled, and suddenly he was the same cocky Bucky he always was. He pulled you back down to the mattress and you revelled in the sensation of his warm skin against yours as your breasts pressed against his chest. He shimmied your jeans off and peppered your thighs with butterfly kisses as you wriggled and pushed against the sheets.

“You still good?” he asked inquisitively as his fingers wrapped around the sides of your underwear. You looked up at him and nodded eagerly with your consent, causing him to grin and pull the fabric down past your ankles – carelessly throwing into the pile of everything else he’d removed from you.

You didn’t have much time to react before he buried his face between your legs and unleashed his tongue. You squeaked and writhed at the sensation, instinctively pulling back, but he merely tightened his hold on your thighs and pulled you closer against him. You were unable to contain the embarrassing squeal you let out when he found your clit, circling his fingertip in your essence and exploring every part of you. He slowly added a finger inside of you and sent you dizzy. As he lapped at you greedily, you threw yourself back against the pillows and closed your eyes. Your hands fisted the sheets as you bit your lip, everything going a bit fuzzy as your muscles started to slacken and sag one by one. You realised you were making whimpering noises, but they seemed far away – as if in a different room.

You felt yourself near closer and closer to the precipice as he began to vary the pressure and speed, humming triumphantly as he took you apart. Bastard. He was enjoying this. If you had the strength to look up, you knew you’d see him thrilled to reduce you to a gibbering wreck.

He added a second finger and that seemed to erase any final coherence you held. Your climax hit you fast and you cried out as your head rocked against the pillows, pitifully gyrating against his hand as you bathed in the warmth of the sensation. He quickly moved his face away from between your legs as he continued to work you over with his fingers, unable to resist enjoying your orgasm along with you as he aligned his hips with yours and pressed himself into you – his jeans still halfway down his thighs. Through your haze you felt the outline of him through his boxers, sending an urgent siren into the lizard part of your brain, you needed this man badly. He was all you needed. He kissed you sloppily, the sheer lewdness of your climax still dusted across his lips causing another aftershock as everything stilled and slowed.

Panting vigorously, you sat up, but he gently pulled you back down.

“Easy, tiger,” he grinned as he pulled you against him, “no sudden movements”.

You rolled your eyes but were quietly grateful for the reprieve. “Oh hush,” you chided, “let’s dial the ego down a little…”

He smirked and kissed your cheek, holding you in his arms and pulling you flush against him as you laid together. The two of you were still, serene, and for a moment you weren’t just two ‘friends’ unable to deny your physical chemistry. No, this felt intimate. Close. You traced a finger down the side of his face, carefully exploring his features, his freckles, his scars. Memorising it all as if you’d need it for later. He watched you intently and did the same to you, the stark frigidity of his metal digit a contrast to your flushed skin. Nothing was spoken, but nothing needed to be.

You found yourself lost in those cerulean eyes of his. It was almost…soothing. You weren’t thinking about Granny, or the house, or your grief. You weren’t agonising about where you stood with Bucky or what you ‘were’ together. You weren’t preparing your next quip or jibe for him. You were just existing quietly. It had been so long since the buzzing noise in your head was quiet. You’d almost forgotten what it felt like to feel peace.

It seemed to happen both quickly and slowly at the same time. He moved on top of you as he continued to smother you with kisses, no inch of your body untouched. Suddenly he was between your thighs, his jeans discarded. You moved to place your hand inside his boxers, but he caught it and gruffly whispered, “another time,” as he moved your hand back down, “I can’t wait any longer” he told you with urgency. He parted your thighs and then he was between them as he rustled his underwear off, he gave you another deep kiss as he gradually pushed himself inside. You gasped at the feel of him, his size and his fullness a shock (despite your suspicions…) He held you tightly but moved gently, muttering whispers of praise and admiration for you as he sheathed himself entirely inside you. You’re beautiful. You’re perfect. You look like an angel like this.

His nose met yours and he scrutinised your face carefully to ensure you were on board. Then he began to thrust…slowly at first but building his strokes up to a faster tempo as you bucked your hips in time with his. You gasped and sighed and moaned as he moved, and he greedily devoured each sound you made as he shared his own with you in return. It became more frantic, hands tangled in hair, fingernails scraped down backs, saliva glistening on skin. You shifted and turned him, moving so that you were in his lap while he was still seated inside. He smirked at your initiative and his hands gripped your waist. One hot, one cold. You began to bounce, building and building as you huffed and mewled. He aided the rhythm by moving your waist in time to your tempo, but let you set the pace and conduct. It all felt so good. So right. You were on fire but in the best possible way. You didn’t care how your body might look, if you might be sweating or what kind of noises or facial expressions you might be making. Nothing mattered except how it felt and being in this moment with him.

You came hard, digging your fingers almost brutally into his shoulders as you closed your eyes and let out a low moan. He joined you, his forehead against your chin as he groaned against your neck. His hips stuttered as you felt the warmth of his release fill you, vulgar but so desperately needed.

You both stayed as you were for a moment, regaining your bearings and letting your heavy breaths plateau. He tilted your head with his finger and gave you a kiss so tender and chaste you could almost forget you were dripping with his spend. He looked up at you and smiled.

“I’m glad I hired you…”

[serpentsillusion]

*Mild language, sexual and suggestive content warning* 🤭⚠️ 🔞 a little humorous too. I live to make you all giggle a little.

The Silver Trio hanging around Hog's Head Alley and Sebastian apparently has a "soft item" kink...but he will never admit it, knowingly... MC is being her cheeky and feisty self (like always), and Ominis just puts up with both of them. MC is a veteran of their boyish games at this point and can joke around in a vulgar manner with absolutely no problem. (She was raised by her -wizard military- father mostly) one of the many things Seb absolutely adores about her. Her tough and cocky yet awkward and rather somewhat feminine side caught his eye in DATDA class when she royally served his ass in front of everyone.

✨🐍

Please let me know what you guys think! I literally just started writing, and I'm quickly realizing that I actually enjoy it! What do you want to read next? Do you want to see my MC? Ask me anything and give me a follow! I would very much appreciate the spirits and the support! 😁✨

Enjoy!

*Ominis, Sebastian and MC walking around, hanging out in the shady part of hogsmeade together*

MC: Why does it always smell like urine and ass, over here?

Sebastian: Maybe because it mostly is?? Do you ever think about that MC? No. You don't, because you only think about yourself.

MC: *is shooketh* How dare you... At least I don't beat my dick into a fuzzy blanket every night...

Sebastian: *gasps* HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT?! Who told you? *Sebastian shoots a sharp glare straight through Ominis*

Ominis: HA!

MC: You're not denying it Seb.

Sebastian, (obviously lying): pfft..I don't USE a fuzzy blanket, I use my HAND, like a man... Ominis is lying to you.

Ominis: I never said a word.

MC: He's right... he didn't say anything Seb.

Sebastian: Argh! He didn't have to!! I can't go around telling all my secrets can I? And if I DO, I tell only one person. And that's Ominis.

MC: so no fuzzy blanket then?

Sebastian: OH MY MERLIN!! 💢

Ominis: Will you two just stop bickering like a married couple for two seconds and just kiss each other already!! Get it over with! I'm growing increasingly tired of having to listen to you two spat all the time!

*Sebastian and MC look at each other quickly and look back at Ominis shocked by his very statement.*

MC: You want me and Sebastian to kiss?! Right here? Right NOW?

Sebastian, (silently to himself): OMG. yus

Ominis: *stopping in his tracks* If it will get to guys to stop fighting all the time then yes. ALSO, MC! The blanket he "does" in fact "use" happens to be mine by the way. *he glares over to Sebastian's direction* It WAS a gift from my Aunt, until some freckled little rat stole it. It also used to be called "Mr. Fuzzy"...

MC: *snickering* Mr. Fuzzy.. kinky but okay. Glad to finally know Sebastian's got a Kink. ✨Heh heh.

Sebastian: Hey!! I'M NOT KINKY!

MC: *shoots finger guns at Seb* heh. Kinky. I knew it! *Finger gun noises* heh heh.

Sebastian, (trying to act cool): I'm not kinky, I'm pretty standard actually..😒

MC: standard huh? Is that what you call it? Well Damn! I honestly took you for a pretty "well rounded" type of guy 😏... Weird.

Sebastian: *realizing what he just said, and what MC is hinting at* OH! that's not what I meant!! M-Maybe I-I am well rou- Argh! Why are you being so cheeky MC? (Seb is getting flustered btw)

MC: I got it from my parents probably. Idk. *She shrugs*

Sebastian: Are your parents as difficult as you are?

MC: Nah. Worse..

Ominis: *turns, leans in, and whispers* Maybe if you actually told MC how you felt about her Sebastian, how you wanted it to be her, then it WOULD be HER you were "using" for your freaky little sexual fantasies.. instead of MY old blanket!

Sebastian: OH here we go again, Ominis.. I'm over here.

Ominis: wtf. 

MC: I heard all of that. 

Sebastian: What did he say?

Ominis: Merlin's beard! I can't help it if you guys stand so insufferably close together!!

MC: I'm not going to say a word to him about it Ominis. Lol

Ominis: shush MC

Sebastian: Why are you guys whispering? STOP TALKING ABOUT ME! 💢

*MC straightens herself and very quickly looks back and forth between Seb and Ominis not knowing what to say, she can feel her cheeks getting hot from the literal whole tea pot Ominis just dumped on his best friend*

MC: We we're uh talking about that cat over there. Also, *she starts panicking* I'm changing my name to Mr. Fuzzy.

Sebastian: wait what?

Ominis: What?

MC: what? 😳

MC, (to herself): why am I like this? 😭

Sebastian: Ominis can't even see, let alone a stray cat.. stop being sus MC. What about Mr. Fuzzy?...Btw that's a really dumb name for a blanket Ominis.

Ominis: Rude.

*Splishing-splash sounds are heard around Ominis' feet*

Ominis: You guys.... I think my left shoe is wet..

Sebastian: Oh.. your standing in a puddle of urine probably Ominis.

Ominis: *immediately pukes*

Sebastian: How lovely! Now it smells like urine, ass AND now Ominis over here.

MC: probably smells better than Mr. Fuzzy.

Sebastian: OH FOR MERLIN'S SAKE!!💢

[lizzybeth1986]

Hana and Madeleine: When You Reward Your Favourite Bully with One of Her Victims

Series - TRR's Alternative LIs: The "Romances" That Didn't Happen

Previous - Maxwell and Penelope: When You Like the Side Character So Much, You Gift Her A Shiny New LI

A/N1: Apologies, again, for the length of this. There was so much damn retconning to wade through that it felt like a rollercoaster to write. There is also not going to be a lot of Hana in this, as I needed to unravel so many inconsistencies in Madeleine's writing. I also didn't want this to become a repeat of my essay series on Hana (which you can read here).

CW: Descriptions of bullying and intimidation, as well as dismissiveness of the same both in canon and from fandom. A mention of the 'infertility' plotline written for Hana in TRH1. Mentions of parental abuse and neglect.

In every other essay in this series, it's been important for me to analyse the potential of the pairings TRR went for. No matter how badly PB handled them later on, one could find promise in the possibilities of these pairings, and if written well they could result in a sweet, happy ending for the LIs we didn't marry. With a better sense of balance from the writers and less vitriol and double standards (in some cases) from the fandom, they could have worked.

Not so for this pairing.

In the case of Hana and Madeleine,it would have been far far better if this pairing had never happened at all. The problem wasn't just in the development; the roots of such a pairing itself were rotten.

(White) Female Antagonists

Before I delve into the characters involved in this pairing, it's important we take another deep dive into a narrative practice we often see with PB. Their blatant favouring of specifically white female antagonists.

Now, it's not as if white men in antagonistic roles don't get favourable writing from their teams and adulation from sections of the fandom (one has to only look at some of the posts Gaius Augustine of BB, Caleb of Hero, and Kane of TE got - just to name a few). But we also often see fans of such white women decry the (very little compared to their black counterparts) condemnation that their faves get for their actions in comparison to both antagonistic and romanceable white men. Such readers often neglect to acknowledge exactly how much the narrative bends over backwards to accomodate them, in a way that they never have done for even mildly hostile/wary black and brown women. And often this is with ample support and encouragement within the fandom itself.

One cannot even pretend this is a recent development. The early books had their fair share of white-woman-adulation and you can see some of the patterns that would solidify in PB discourse already take shape in their early books.

One excellent example of this is TCaTF. Compare the treatment that white women like Helene Leventis, Hex and Zenobia Nevrakis are given, to what Rowan Thorn - a black woman - gets. Helene is allowed to escape never to return, or join Kenna, despite being the woman who killed her mentor and close friend Gabriel. Hex is well known in the series for her sadistic torture devices and for destroying an extremely prosperous kingdom. Yet, she is captured - alive - and there are two options that allow her a bit more mercy, and only one that recommends the harshest of punishments. Rowan in the meantime only betrays Kenna if the latter is an absolute tyrant to her, and letting her go if she betrays her is touted as a failure. Her loyalty doesn't ensure she will live like Diavolos' does - you can in fact leave her to die if you don't have enough diamonds/prestige points.

The Freshman was an improvement on this: even if Becca Davenport started out as a classic college mean girl, her redemption arc involved her needing to work to regain trust with the group and her best friend Madison, regardless of the MC's fondness of her. Her housemates immediately set her straight when she lashes out at them at the beginning of TS, and Becca has to plan for almost a-book-and-a-half to get her friendship with Madison back to normal again.

Sadly, this is something that rarely ever happened again. Discrepancies in character treatment became more and more obvious as the years passed. Books where black and brown women behaved even mildly unimpressed or catty with the MC, showed them either suffering grievous fates or written out of the narrative (eg. Scarlett not even getting a proper future in the VoS bonus scene) or being mistrusted and misunderstood constantly by the MC and their friends (Aurora). Books where white women could cause grievous harm depicted them being let off without so much as a slap on the wrist (eg. Aunt Mallory of RoE being rewarded with a happy life, a man and reconciliation with the niece she tried to kill and the daughter she emotionally abused).

(Screenshots from SavageLordBarlow's YouTube channel)

Perhaps the worst and most obvious case to date was that of Vanessa Blackwood of MoTY, who called a young child "guttersnipe" within minutes of encountering her, outed a lesbian teacher, encouraged her son's bullying, provided legal counsel to the MC's ex husband just to see the woman suffer, and engineered a plot to frame the MC for theft so she could lose her job. Once Vanessa had crossed her limits, PB ensured they laid on the sympathy narrative thick, having her show sad faces when the MC scolded her in a paywall scene, punishing only her brown lackey (both the white people involved - Vanessa and Guy - are never named when Tallulah is exposed, even though she literally stole jewellery and framed the MC for them). In the series finale, Vanessa was rewarded with a cushy diamond scene where the MC can choose (in what is the understatement of the century) to call her "classist and a little bit racist" - all she is given at the end of the book is an extremely softball form of criticism.

Compare this to Xanthe of ACOR, who had far less power, who was repeatedly slut shamed by the MC and others for doing her job, and whose end was met in a "comical" scene that implied she'd been sold into sexual slavery while two black members of her scholae gloated over her plight (in a manner so uncharacteristic of them that even players who didn't necessarily like Xanthe were shocked. I would highly recommend you read @cassiopeiacorvus' excellent essay on her, "Xanthe: Courtesan, Rival, Pawn").

In an essay I'd written years ago, I'd noted the following:

"Check out who the narrative rewards you for treating well, as opposed to who will be made to support you either way.

You're allowed to show basic decency to a black or brown woman. But you're expected to show kindness, understanding and empathy to a white woman, and richly rewarded if you do. In some cases you will also face consequences if you don't. (Fandom - take note of the difference, and be sure not to forget it)."

Madeleine Amaranath is probably one of the best examples of this - with blatant retcons, unfounded adulation and obvious pandering lasting over five books.

Rules of Engagement

When we look at the full cast of TRR, we find at least six characters who are callbacks to its sister series, Rules of Engagement. Leo, Constantine, Regina, Bastien, Madeleine and Rashad (the last one was an addition from TRR2 onwards). Part of TRR's appeal as a series was its ability to reference the earlier one through these characters, but this time from the PoV of Leo's younger brother instead.

Madeleine appeared in only 2 chapters in RoE. She was Leo's fiancée, in an arranged match that not only their parents but their citizens expected, unfazed by the "commoners" Leo brought to his bed and secure in the knowledge that no matter who he slept with she would eventually become his Queen. Leo dashes these expectations, however, by abdicating his claim to the throne - whether the RoE MC chooses him or not.

At this point - when TRR was barely even a concept - Leo was a clear fan favourite. Players liked the idea of romancing a rogue prince from a fictional European country; it meant they could revel in the luxury of touching royalty, while being away from all the hard, unsavoury parts. The Madeleine angle provided them with a rival to fight off, and at the time that was all that mattered.

Was Leo's behaviour in RoE, towards both the RoE MC and Madeleine, dishonest? Definitely, but not many seemed to care much at the time and it hardly created a dent in his fanbase (most of the criticisms against him and his cheating ways and irresponsibility would emerge later - when the Leo stans became Drake stans, and it was more convenient to badmouth Liam's family).

Jeffrey Herdman, a Junior Game Writer with Pixelberry for over 7 years, was a part of both the RoE and TRR teams, and proudly admitted in the TRR2 pre-release interview, to being the one in charge of writing Madeleine:

Q: Very funny. (Just so we're clear, Jeffrey is joking. Sort of.) Out of curiosity, who's your favorite character to write in The Royal Romance?

Jeffrey: Madeleine. It's fun to write someone who's constantly trying to spin a situation to their benefit, and making power plays along the way. I've actually been writing for Madeleine since her appearance in Rules of Engagement: Book 2, so we're practically besties.

Excerpt from The Royal Romance: Book 2 Interview

(If we were to compare this adulation of the character from Jeffrey, to the person who wrote Hana - head writer Jennifer Young, you'd find a surprising difference. In this very interview Jennifer talks about enjoying the process of writing Hana, but pointed to Drake as her favourite LI - "In my personal game, my love interest is definitely Drake, and I totally make Kara write him just so I can read his scenes and enjoy the romance. =)".

Perhaps if Jennifer had spent less time fawning over Drake, and more time doing Hana's story justice, that LI wouldn't be stuck in a situation where the team constantly erased her experiences and history to benefit their favourites)

When you look at Jeffrey's open admiration of Madeleine, and trace her fairly choppy and largely incoherent narrative journey through the books...a lot of things begin to make sense.

TRR1 - Would a TRR1 Madeleine Have Been A Better Fit for Hana?

When you look at the first book, you can tell that the possibility of any of the other alternative pairings besides Liam and Olivia wasn't really entertained. There is no buildup at all for Maxwell x Penelope, Drake x Kiara - and not even a single direct interaction between fellow competitors Hana and Madeleine. In fact, TRR2 often had to cover up for the lack of interaction in certain cases by making the alternative LI come up with justifications for why they weren't approaching the LI before.

There is maybe one implied interaction between Hana and Madeleine, that I don't think even the writers paid much attention to at the time. In the pie baking scene in Applewood, Hana is assigned to Madeleine's team if the MC doesn't take her along. Whichever group Hana is in, she is in charge of the pie design.

In the diamond scene, she takes the MC's suggestions and gives her advice on the amount of apples required for the filling. Given that she gives credit to the MC (in front of Queen Regina) in this option, and doesn't not do the same for Madeleine, it is likely that she was allowed to decorate for the other team, but not with much input from the captain.

This pie has a rose design, which is beautiful but lacks the intricacy and the challenge of the Cordonian Royal Seal, which the MC can suggest in the diamond scene. It's possible that by default, Madeleine handled the baking herself (since Penelope couldn't even boil water and in fact is so distracted she unwittingly helps sabotage the pie), and Hana was assigned strictly decoration duties. But even these possibilities rely on conjecture and guesswork, with no real dialogue or interaction shown.

There are no other scenes where the two women talk or do anything together. Hana may be present in one or two scenes where Madeleine is speaking (such as the dining scene in Ch 17 where Madeleine tells the court ladies about the upcoming Engagement Tour), but the two never directly engage with each other. It's more likely that (like Maxwell and Penelope, or Drake and Kiara), the writers may have thought of Hana and Madeleine only in the second or third book - more likely the third, but there are possible hints in TRR2 if you squint.

Hana is an interesting anomaly among the cast of TRR. She is both Cordonian and foreigner; the ways of the Cordonian court are, in equal parts, both familiar and confusing to her. This serves as an double-edged advantage to the MC - Hana is both skilled and knowledgeable enough to ease her into the culture, and isolated and vulnerable enough for the MC to step up as a hero on occasion. We also find out in Lythikos (TRR1 Ch 7) that she was so deep in the closet that she couldn't fully articulate her struggle to love the romantic English noble who wanted to marry her, in the presence of the woman she was slowly beginning to love. Within the competition itself, Hana is shown having a hard time finding people who will associate with her, often shown left out of events and her yacht party abandoned during the Regatta. The broken engagement could have a hand in making her appear to be struggling in the competition, but tbh Olivia is the only one who brings it up. Overall, she does well in the competition, but gets little credit for the same.

Madeleine is the polar opposite of this. Even though the ladies of the court initially view her with a mixture of pity and respect (due to her broken engagement with Leo, and her position as a Countess and winner of the previous season), their views on Madeleine once she enters the competition range from anger (Olivia), to speculation (Kiara and Penelope), to indifference and later suspicion (the MC).

Madeleine comes into the social season with several advantages: her pedigree and her years of experience at court. Both Bertrand and the MC note that Madeleine hails from a "powerful family" and "is immersed in the intrigues and maneuverings of courtly life", and therefore the MC is cautioned by Applewood to pay more attention to her than to Olivia. If the MC fails to win court favour, both Penelope and Kiara show allegiance to Madeleine. Where Hana is shown to be vulnerable despite her skills, charm and intelligence, Madeleine is meant to be viewed with respect even by her peers - and expected not to return that respect to others unless they're the king and queen.

I often view the Madeleine of Book 1 (and early TRR2), and the Madeleine of the latter half of Book 2, as two separate people (more on that in the next section). Early Madeleine was depicted as a clear threat. While she does nothing too out-of-pocket during the competition, her threats to the MC once she is (optionally) the favourite frontrunner, her singular focus on only the king and queen (and largely ignoring the Prince), and inability to respectfully lose, ensure that the reader registers her as a figure of danger early on. The first time she (optionally) faces an obvious loss and sees the MC crowned as Apple Queen, Madeleine tells her to "savour these moments. You may never hear the phrase again".

Her very extreme attempts to belatedly win Liam's favour after ignoring him the entire season (we later find out that she barged into his sleeping quarters the previous night and suggested the arrangement that Liam speaks about in TRR2), earns her speculative looks from the MC and wariness from Liam himself. Given that the outcome was so different in TRR2 but the buildup to said outcome was so rushed and chaotic, there is a 70/30 chance that Madeleine's buildup in Book 1 was meant to highlight her as someone with the capability to harm the MC, rather than just as a red herring. At the very most, Book 1 would highlight her as powerful, with the intention that Book 2 would follow through with showing her as a cog in a very vicious machine.

But because Madeleine's actions in TRR1 don't result in any direct harm, it's honestly hard to envision her as dangerous beyond the subtle threats (that people could brush off as basic rivalry) and rank classism.

Would Hana's pairing with the Madeleine of TRR1 have worked? It's equally hard to say. If we take only Book 1 into account, and ignore the very real possibility of a threat that Madeleine represents, there's a sliver of a chance that such a pairing could work...if Madeleine works on herself. At this point she hasn't manifested as a direct threat to Hana in a way that, say, Olivia has - and all the MC has at this point are theories and speculation. You'd have to probably change half of Madeleine's characterization, but it could be workable if the foundation for such a pairing was mutual respect from the start.

Still, when you take into consideration that Madeleine being involved in the plot against the MC was a very legitimate possibility, it's hard to see any opening for this pairing. Even Penelope - whose coddling from the narrative knew no limits - was no longer entertained as a potential alternative romance for an LI the moment her role in the plot was uncovered. If any harm was done to the MC, and Madeleine was found to be behind it, there is no way Hana would even be allowed to entertain the thought of her as an alternative LI at all.

You see - hurting Hana is no big deal. But hurting the MC and still getting an LI to show interest in you? Now that would be beyond the pale!

Madeleine: A Red Herring...Or A Villain Retconned?

As I have mentioned earlier, there is one writer - who has seniority in the company because of his many years there, who has always been in charge of Madeleine's writing, and who has always loved writing her. On close inspection one can say for certain that Jeffrey Herdman had a fair bit of sway in the team itself, especially from the fact that one of his weirdest writing suggestions - the MC's supposed obsession with hats - was retained in the books as a gag for a very, very long time (TRF finale livestream interview). When you take both Jeffrey's sway in the team, and the writing of Madeleine in TRR2 and 3 (and beyond), one can make several educated guesses about what Madeleine was built up to be, and how that changed midway.

Plenty of fan posts written in the gap between TRR1's finale and TRR2's release, took for granted that Madeleine would have some role to play in the plot against the MC. While one may assume this was due to "jealousy" from players or "hate for a bitchy character", there were enough signs in TRR1 and 2 that this was the route the narrative was initially planning to take with her.

The MC does voice suspicions of Madeleine in the first book - mostly after Madeleine herself voices threats to the MC during the Apple Queen ceremony. Madeleine also looks apprehensive at the (optional) public support Liam shows towards the MC at the Beaumont estate, and even shows him a suspiciously huge amount of attention at the Coronation. The MC even confronts Madeleine during the Coronation festivities when she gets a note threatening her to withdraw from the competition, believing it was sent by the latter. But beyond this, Madeleine's own words in TRR1 often sound ominous and laced with subtle threats. Still - going by just TRR1's evidence, Madeleine could still work as a good red herring, since she's not exactly crossed a clear line with anyone yet.

TRR2 seems to go in one direction when it comes to Madeleine's arc, then makes a sharp pivot in the opposite direction post Chs 7 and 8. The first half of the book has both the MC and Liam regard her with doubt and suspicion, especially when the MC learns that Madeleine had come to Liam's rooms the night before the Coronation, and insisted he continue the relationship with the MC on the sly while making her the queen. The book presents several contrasts between Madeleine and the MC, presenting their possible ruling styles and envisioning how each woman would fare as a future queen.

In a diamond scene in TRR2 Ch 4, Liam asks the MC how she would handle a plate of curry chicken falling on someone - an incident that has already occurred in some playthroughs to Madeleine (who got recognizably frustrated and called the whole episode "a disaster"). In contrast, the MC can claim she would either defuse the situation with humour or help clear the mess - both of which establish that unlike Madeleine the MC knows how to adapt to different situations, and prefers to find a solution rather than take her frustrations out on everyone else. Liam points out the differences between the two women as the MC "having perspective... every gaffe isn't a disaster".

Multiple scenes in the story focus on Madeleine's rigidity, her inability to adapt, her hunger for power, her belief that becoming queen gives her a free pass to be a tyrant, her hubris that allows her to outright harm some of her ladies in waiting and believe she will never face consequences, and her overall lack of real impact during her own engagement tour (only if the MC fails miserably does the Italian statesman Francesco even mention Madeleine). A lot of this buildup indicates that she won't be as effective a queen as other characters claim she will be.

Her overall behaviour in the first half of TRR2 seems to highlight overconfidence, and a willingness to overstep every possible boundary in the belief that nothing will now prevent her from getting what she wants ("the best part about being Queen is that I don't have to explain myself to anyone. Including you."). Even though she isn't queen yet, both Madeleine and everyone around her behave as if she has already been crowned! That kind of overconfidence - especially from someone who should know better than anyone that winning the competition doesn't necessarily mean she'll be crowned - makes more sense when she is aware that there are powerful people (like the former king and her aunt, the former queen) to back her.

There is also the fact that Penelope's involvement in the plot never got any proper buildup. There is just one scene, in TRR2 Ch 6, where she speaks about feeling uncomfortable at parties and balls, and how much she hates crowds. The reveal of her being the culprit is in Ch 7; the reveal of her social anxiety is in Ch 8. Before this, you have zero indicators of her being involved in this level of deception - even though her history of "social anxiety" should have ideally made that kind of subterfuge difficult, and she should have been able to leave a few tells, signalling her guilt. It is very clear on rereads that Penelope's involvement in the plot was a last-minute narrative decision.

But perhaps the strongest evidence that TRR2 was originally meant to establish Madeleine as part of the plot against the MC, is a line from the very first scene of the book. When a confused MC asks Bertrand how it's possible for Liam to break his engagement, Bertrand mentions a constitutional provision:

"The king is able to change his selection in specific cases for the good of the nation". The MC being proven as framed and unfairly disgraced achieves very little in this context, because the focus is clearly on the king's final choice. This means that the engagement cannot be voided on the basis of the MC being innocent, but on the basis of Madeleine being unfit for the role.

What happens to this "constitutional clause" once Penelope is declared the culprit among the court ladies rather than Madeleine? It disappears completely. If she was really meant to be a red herring from the start, the team would never have added this line in the first place. Nor would they have left the "buildup" for Penelope's anxiety till Ch 6, just one chapter before her reveal. If Madeleine was really meant to be a mere red herring from the start, there would have been more than just one crumb presented for that trail.

It is highly possible that the team had plans for Madeleine to be involved in the plot, or in something shady enough to justify breaking the engagement. It is just as highly possible that Jeffrey, the writer in charge of her character, allowed his favouritism for that character to dictate his writing of her, and convinced the team to change the trajectory of the story to benefit her.

Hana and Madeleine - The First Half of TRR2

Most of the interactions between Hana and Madeleine in TRR2 are overshadowed by one incident in Ch 7 - the one most popularly known as "the chocolate incident". Madeleine was already not too popular as a character when this scene came out, but her admission that she wanted to break Hana crossed enough of a line that a number of players would bring it up as a reason for why they couldn't ever like her, no matter how often she was retconned in canon.

A common misconception made about the "chocolate incident" from Madeleine lovers and haters alike, is that it's viewed as a singular episode rather than as an escalation in an ongoing pattern of threats that Madeleine was already making to Hana.

Viewing it as an isolated incident is precisely what allowed both Madeleine stans, and the canon narrative itself, to severely downplay what Madeleine did, and what she openly declared she would continue doing to Hana. Therefore, it is essential to look into Hana and Madeleine's interactions before Ch 7, as well as the context behind Hana's return to court and the very real and grave threat that Madeleine represents to Hana specifically.

To do this, we must first look into how Hana's return to court (after her parents forced her to leave post Coronation) is depicted. There are two versions of this story - Madeleine's version...and the truth.

Madeleine's Version: "If it wasn't for me, she'd still be on the other side of the world. I've heard dogs remember those who feed them. I hope you'll keep this in mind and remember that dear Hana is here by my personal invitation". This is a half-truth at best and ironically, this is the version Hana sticks to. She is never allowed to tell us differently.

The truth, as said by Liam to Hana post Coronation: "I am the King of Cordonia. I'm sure Lady Madeleine knows that if she wants to keep our engagement, she'll have to give me something. Perhaps I can convince her to make you part of her court". Hana never gets to tell us this. That honour is given to Drake!

Even after the MC (optionally) gets to know this truth, she never talks to Hana about it, and Hana is never allowed to veer from Madeleine's narrative even in private. In the process, Madeleine gets to use her half-truth as a form of blackmail - threatening Hana at least twice to send her back to China if she paces even one toe out of Madeleine's arbitrary line.

In TRR2 Ch 4, Madeleine is shown antagonizing her entire court (ordering Penelope to get lemonade and comparing her to dogs, telling Kiara to exoticize herself by not speaking in English [which itself has colonial/Orientalist connotations]). But none is more ominous and disturbing than her subtle threat to Hana before introducing her to the two suitors:

Being sent back to her parents is a terrifying prospect for Hana...for two reasons. For one, Hana is committed to being there for the MC, to contributing to her investigation (and she does! Massively. Perhaps more than anyone else in the group). For another, she is just beginning to realize what a damaging environment her parents' house is, and she also knows they are already growing suspicious that she hasn't found another suitor yet. By the end of this conversation, Hana is visibly distraught... to the point of needing moral support (something she rarely asks for herself).

Remember - this is an arbitrary rule Madeleine comes up with, that applies only to Hana. In the same conversation, neither Kiara nor Penelope are placed under this kind of pressure. Though Penelope claims in Ch 6 that her parents won't allow her to come home if she doesn't get a suitor, Madeleine doesn't levy any other threats of this nature on her (she harms Penelope in other ways).

Madeleine is aware that Liam was the one responsible for Hana's return. It is implied that she is also aware that neither Liam nor Hana can say this in public. By this coin, she'd know that she shouldn't be the one who can take a call on sending Hana back - Liam is. Yet she issues this sort of a threat, and worse still...is allowed to get away with it through Hana and the MC's silence, both in private and in public.

Unlike the MC and Olivia, the other three ladies of the court are present in official positions to the future Queen, and are expected to publicly pledge loyalty to her. The narrative of TRR2 alone seems to give the King's fiancèe powers and influences similar to an actual Queen Consort's. And Hana, Kiara and Penelope aren't just random "court members" - they are Madeleine's ladies-in-waiting. They cannot even speak to certain people unless she approves of it (Ch 1), she orders them around with the disrespect that many in that nobility reserve for their servants (Penelope in Ch 4), she publicly humiliates and insults them if they make a single mistake (eg. Penelope not getting a metallic dress in time for the bachelorette), and she can get away with causing them grievous harm (Hana). There is no actual point to any of this behaviour - it achieves nothing and (by the narrative parameters of the third book) is actually foolish, because Madeleine's actions could cost the royal family their relationship with the Great Houses. Neither the MC nor Liam (the actual monarch), would be allowed by the narrative later to abuse their power the way Madeleine can, in a position that isn't even hers yet!

It is easy to view Madeleine's interactions with Hana and Penelope especially, as just some regular mean-girls shit, with all the excuses, justifications and crocodile tears that the fandom can shower on said white/white-passing mean girls. Canon itself encourages this reading when they use the word "hazing" to describe what Madeleine put Hana through. But when we speak of Madeleine's behaviour in her engagement tour that way, we miss a very important aspect of her dynamic with these two women. They are no longer competitors or mere allies. They are not just people she knows in court.

They are not Madeleine's equals. They are her employees. She is directly in a position of immense, unquestioned and unchecked power over them. Publicly, she has the authority to invite them into her court, and to throw them out of their jobs. It is from that lens, that we must view her behaviour, especially in Ch 7.

The "Chocolate Incident" and Its Aftermath

Another reason to believe Jeffrey's favouritism for Madeleine allowed for an actual change in the story, is the way this above scene - and the ones preceding it - were handled immediately in both the immediate and long-term aftermath.

Often dubbed "the chocolate incident", this scene takes place in Italy (the first stop of the engagement tour) during Madeleine's bachelorette. For anyone who has forgotten the incident, Madeleine's ladies-in-waiting are supposed to organize different fun activities for her bachelorette, and the MC uses each event as both a PR exercise and an opportunity to check the credit cards of the ladies.

The final activity is Hana's, an intricately-planned chocolate fondue party complete with chocolate-themed games and treats. If one reads too much between the lines, one could maybe notice the tiniest sliver of a romantic hint in Hana's conversation with the MC over her confusing an actual bachelorette party with the show The Bachelorette (It is just as possible tho - if not more - that this is a comic aside pointing to Hana's lack of exposure to modern media).

However, things take a turn for the worst at this juncture. Madeleine heavily berates Hana for not knowing that she is "allergic to chocolate", accusing her of an attempt to murder and even threatening to remove her from her position in court. This leaves Hana so distraught that she ruins her own dress in the process, and is damn near inconsolable. The MC can - if she chooses - comfort Hana along with their friends. At the end of the night, a heavily drunk Madeleine gleefully admits she lied about the allergy and gloats about wanting to keep hurting Hana till she breaks, because she "wants to have a little fun".

She claims, when asked why, that it's because "everyone wants something, but the nice ones like Hana don't even have the decency to act like it". Which sounds like the sort of sick logic that fandom often happily accepts from their favourite white antagonists, where they can project whatever sob story they want to make such a reasoning palatable. Such attempts ignore the fact that Madeleine is torturing someone for supposed "duplicity" when she is herself well-known for being insincere.

Later, when it was convenient for the fandom to hate on Hana, she would be either blamed for the torture Madeleine put her through (because she was "weak" or "too nice", or that she was "spineless and deserved this treatment". I even saw posts that claimed it "wasn't that bad" (in the case of one particularly memorable instance, a Madeleine stan went so far as to say, agreeing with a post expressing a fondness for Madeleine: "...before anyone mentions the chocolate prank: Did Hana die, tho?"). Some also tried to reason that it was fair for Madeleine to target Hana, either to showcase her "wiles" or because of her sad sad childhood.

As I pointed out earlier, every single one of these takes tend to downplay Madeleine's bullying/abuse so that it sounds more like a schoolyard squabble that happened only once, rather than a person in power consistently placing their employee's job under threat, with the stated intention of harming them mentally and emotionally on a regular basis, until they experienced a breakdown. The center of this conflict isn't about different people with different approaches. Nor is it about court maneuvering or wiles because honestly, nothing worthwhile was achieved through Madeleine's abuse, and she had no purpose for doing those things beyond deriving a sick pleasure from other people's suffering.

It isn't about nice vs tough, nor ambitious vs generous, nor "naive" vs "jaded". It is about a gross power imbalance. An imbalance that results in the exploitation of the more vulnerable party...which is later brushed aside by the one who claims to be the latter's "friend" like it means nothing.

Structure wise, one can see striking similarities between this chapter, and TRR1's Ch 7, where the MC can view Olivia in a new light in the first half of the chapter, but be disturbed by her vindictive nature by the end of it. Here too, the MC comes into the investigation of the credit cards fully expecting to see Madeleine as the culprit. Over the course of the evening she finds Madeleine treating her ladies-in-waiting badly, but also calling out the press for targeting only the MC but staying silent on Tariq's involvement (ironically, Madeleine herself didn't exactly believe the MC if she tells her she was set up). She is also shocked when she realises Madeleine isn't the culprit at the club. Still, the court is given a rude shock when Hana is accused of putting Madeleine's life in danger.

Clearly the aim of such a chapter was to make the MC soften a little towards Madeleine, while still keeping some of the antagonistic tension. However, the more direct impact of Madeleine's huge ego trip on Hana made the harm far more visible than Olivia's jibes towards a woman who was far away...plus the scenes that followed in the former sequence centered Drake, far more than the ones in the latter that involved comforting Hana.

Madeleine's bullying also clashes - quite conveniently - with the reveal of Penelope's betrayal, so that the latter overshadows what Hana went through altogether.

It is important to note at this point that the MC is the only person not directly tied in an alliance to Madeleine (besides Olivia and Maxwell, who are then missing at the fashion show backstage scene in Paris) who knows Madeleine's intentions towards Hana. She is the only person present at the event in Paris, who knows that Madeleine intended to continue harassing her until she broke. Hana herself is never made fully aware of this, and if she is left in a vulnerable, dangerous position while on her mission to support the MC's investigation - then the fault lies to a large extent with the MC for keeping silent, rather than protecting her friend from someone who fully intended to hurt her.

I say this because in France (Ch 8), the MC's exposing of Madeleine is by choice, rather than default (this essay has a full breakdown of said scene). Moreover, the option where the MC can "expose" her will result in Madeleine lying about the act being an "official hazing" she does for all her ladies-in-waiting. Not only does the MC neglect to contest Madeleine's claims (or even tell Hana the full truth in secret), she also parrots Madeleine's lie in a conversation with Adeleide in NY, as if it were the truth (Ch 14).

Remember how I mentioned Jeffrey - the writer who was in charge of Madeleine's scenes and sang her praises in TRR2's pre-release interview? His influence here is obvious in the way the narrative sharply pivots away from Madeleine's characterization so far, to engage in a full-blown pity party.

The abuses of her power (towards Hana and Penelope in particular) stop. The parallels that canon makes between Madeleine and the MC as future Queens, stop. No reference, ever, is made of her actions before Ch 8.

For over seven chapters, Madeleine largely fades into the background - sometimes there will be scenes where she is present, but without any dialogue or actions. Sometimes she may make a catty move like getting the MC to pick up her wedding ring, but from a safe distance. Because she doesn't openly antagonize anyone or show up much in Chs 9-15, the sense of distance could allow some to soften in their memories of her. Especially when the only strong reminders of Madeleine in these chapters come from Adeleide, her mother.

Adeleide is an important cog in the machinery that resulted in the retconning of Madeleine's character in TRR2. Without her, Patriotic!Madeleine wouldn't have become canon. Adeleide sets the stage for this extremely inaccurate reading of her, with complaints on two occasions about how Madeleine is "putting too much pressure on herself" and working too hard. Which contradicts her very real actions in Applewood and Italy, where she regularly antagonized her entire court and where she doesn't get much notable approval from foreign dignitaries (Signor Francesco) unless the MC is that bad.

The narrative, at this point, expects us to view her with sympathy, as someone who could have been "an excellent queen" (Adeleide's words, not mine). The stage is clearly set so that we pity her when Liam calls off the engagement and she loses this position, that we can see her loss as "unfair". It ensures that there is an overflow of sympathy for Madeleine's plight, especially since she had already lost her chance to become Queen once before with Leo. By this point, many readers had actually forgotten the "chocolate incident" altogether, and were more than willing to view Madeleine as a patriot who wasn't given her due. A description that, ironically, more accurately fits Hana.

Is Hana Really Just A Nice Girl who Never Fights Back?

As I mentioned before, Hana's "niceness" and "weakness" were sometimes presented in fandom as justifications/reasons for Madeleine's bullying of her, often in an attempt to shift blame or make it sound like Madeleine's stated "reasons" (in TRR2 Ch 7) to hurt her were legitimate. Almost as if to say that Hana was targeted because she presents herself as an easy target.

To be clear, I don't subscribe to such a train of thought myself. Different people react to bullies and abusers in different ways - and not being able to push back aggressively in tense situations doesn't make anyone a lesser person. In fact, canon itself doesn't mind providing a "weaker" person protection against someone like Madeleine...as long as that person is Penelope. So we cannot even claim that Hana's "weakness" is why Madeleine targets her, or why the MC shouldn't have to protect Hana better.

Canon also doesn't help much in this respect, especially with their preferences for the meaner white women. In fact the narrative doesn't even allow Hana the chance to speak up in private against Madeleine's half-truths about her return, and she is made to easily accept Madeleine's "hazing" excuse. Let's not even get into how she speaks about Madeleine in TRR3. Additionally, no one in Hana's own friend group provides adequate protection or support - they stay silent where it counts.

But is Hana really that incapable of fighting for herself? According to the finale of TRR1, no.

Even though the scene is hidden behind a paywall, Hana's pushback against Olivia's treatment of her during the social season is strong, decisive and done entirely on her own initiative, with no prompting or involvement from the MC. She is honest about the ways in which Olivia has hurt her, but also makes it clear that Olivia's opinions and vitriol no longer matter - effectively reclaiming her own power in the process.

Such a scene is a clear indicator that Hana is capable of pushing back, and isn't afraid to speak truth to power - as early as TRR1. While one could say that as a diamond scene, it is possible that it can't be fully shown as canon - there are ways the writers know how to incorporate such things. Often, they have managed to write in similar scenes or the same information into free scenes later on (eg. the selling of Liam's bachelor party photos, which wasn't even that important to the story of TRR2). Hana could have had a free pushback scene with Olivia if the writers really wanted to give her one.

That aside, it's safe to say that there is a precedent for Hana being able to fight back before TRR2, and canon could have found ways to ensure that she could safely do so with Madeleine too. Or at least have more protection and care from her friend group, if her position as lady-in-waiting prevented her from speaking out. Penelope got to demand protection later on, after all - and she wasn't even our friend.

We must also take into account the positions of power that Madeleine, Olivia and later even the MC hold. Madeleine is a countess in line to become queen in TRR2. Olivia is a duchess, and the MC herself is given this honour in Book 2. Hana - despite her skills, knowledge and charm - never gets lands, nor a title unless she marries the MC. Hana's experience in Cordonia isn't just about "other women" being mean to her with the MC being "not like other girls" - all three of the above women are in positions of power over her, and even the nicest of them uses her more often than she helps.

TRR2 doesn't exactly build Hana and Madeleine as a pair. In hindsight one can read romantic hints into Madeleine's mocking usage of the word "darling" around Hana, Hana's attempt to replicate The Bachelorette for Madeleine's bachelorette party, and read parallels into both their toxic family histories (particularly Hana with her mother and Madeleine with her father). But there is no actual romantic content there that one could find with the other three pairs, which leads me to believe that Hana and Madeleine was only taken seriously as a romantic prospect in TRR3.

How did Madeleine become the final romantic choice for Hana, and no one else? Because the relationship was never made Hana's benefit - it was for Madeleine's. Given all the evidence laid out about TRR1!Madeleine, TRR2!Madeleine and including hints that she may have actually been written as the villain at some point, it's more likely that Madeleine's main writer ensured some changes in the writing of his favourite character midway into the story, resulting in her staying longer in court and several retcons that painted her as a tragic heroine and completely erased any actions that contradicted such a narrative.

This specific narrative also seems to draw upon a narrative trope that is seen sometimes in certain stories featuring queer couples - the Armoured Closted Gay. It is employed often enough, mostly to show the pervasiveness and immense pressure heteronormativity can have on some queer people - that sometimes, they hate themselves for not adhering to the norm and therefore project that self-hatred onto people like them. PB had done a similar kind of story in TF and ILITW - with Zig and an aggressive teammate Manny (but with discussions on sexual harassment and about being closeted) and with Lily Oritz and her crush Britney. Unlike Zig's and Lily's cases though, this sort of narrative hardly centers on Hana.

Hana is hardly treated as a person in her own right in this narrative. She is treated as a "consolation prize" for Madeleine's "good behaviour" and "hard work". Which is still a really, really hard story to sell when one of the characters states outright that they'd abuse their power over the other till she breaks.

So how does PB get back from that kind of cruelty, and convert it into an actual romance?

Madeleine in TRR3 - The Royal Retcon

(In order: MC complimenting Madeleine to Godfrey (Ch 3), response to Madeleine's "send my regards to Hana (Ch 9), Madeleine asking for a dance (Ch 16), Optional response about memories of Madeleine's bachelorette in Hana's Vegas diamond scene (Ch 16))

By gaslighting an entire fandom, of course.

TRR3 requires us at the very start to do two things - to recruit Madeleine into replacing Justin as our press secretary, and to convince her family to join the Unity Tour so that Cordonia knows its nobility stands with the Crown. Until this point, we've only had hints of Madeleine's so-called "patriotism", mostly from Adeleide. TRR3 Ch 3 goes full force on this reading: having Madeleine claim (in the most positive option) that all her efforts to become queen was "for my people...it was always for Cordonia", having Hana claim that Madeleine "would mostly likely take a bullet for Liam... because you'd never leave Cordonia without a King". Coupled with Godfrey and Adeleide's toxic family dynamics, the story is set to push forward a narrative where we are meant to sympathize with her and preferably downplay her behaviour from the previous book.

Throughout Madeleine's tenure as press sec, we are expected to laud her "work" - even though the truth is that she makes our work harder by giving us heavy folders and 100 note cards of materials just minutes before our meetings, and leaving out important information (like Zeke) for us to scramble about and find. Where during her time as future queen, her ladies-in-waiting were expected to have every detail perfect as per her desires otherwise face her wrath - as our employee, we are expected to appreciate efforts alone, and be lenient when she doesn't follow our rules (eg. wearing gold for our bachelorette when she was supposed to wear muted colours, trying to sneak in a white dress to our wedding). Most of our responses to her "work" involve fulsome praise, or at most a very light criticism that still claims she's good at her job (she isn't). And it isn't just the MC - even Justin (who recommended her) and Hana are made to sing her praises.

Having canon claim Madeleine does a good job when she actually doesn't is... frustrating, but not as awful as the retconning they do for her past behaviour. But it is part of a pattern that whitewashes Madeleine altogether so the readers can consider her deserving of the rewards that the narrative so badly wants to give her, whether her actual conduct matches up to these fulsome praises or not.

One clear tactic that is used to achieve this, was to have the person she harmed the most, speak of her in glowing terms. In TRR3 Ch 3, you have at least two instances during the "Cordonia's Most" game where Hana uses the game to compliment Madeleine. Here, she compliments Madeleine on knowing how to "charm a crowd...her confidence and poise", and claims her to be very patriotic. If the MC refuses to coddle Madeleine during their private conversation, the onus to be kind to her rests solely on Hana's shoulders, where she is required to say, "maybe it's time to see if you can catch more flies with honey". Hana is also shown wanting to include Madeleine in group activities (TRR3 Ch 6, before going to the spa), in the same way she tried to include Olivia in TRR2. When we're shown a Hana who is not only willing but enthusiastic to speak to Madeleine, it further encourages the reader to befriend her - almost as if to say, "if Hana doesn't mind being friendly with her, why should you?".

And this wouldn't be possible at all if canon was honest about Madeleine's conduct in TRR2. So much about Madeleine's advice to us in TRR3 directly contradicts her own behaviour as future queen in TRR2 ("having an entourage isn't about vanity...it's about support"). Had canon actually been honest about her conduct, this statement would be viewed as extremely ironic, a huge portion of the blame for Penelope's reluctance to return to court would be (rightly) placed on Madeleine's shoulders and we would be able to call her out specifically on her tyrannical behaviour as future queen, as well as her inability to adjust her work to suit her client now. We would not be placing Madeleine on a pedestal ad nauseum, or paying much attention to her childish complaints that her "efforts" are going unappreciated.

Whenever the early part of the engagement tour is referenced, it is spoken of in the vaguest, most milquetoast terms. The narrative will speak vaguely of "meanness", but never actually specify what Madeleine did. The closest we get to any sort of confirmation of this is in the Costume Gala (Ch 9) if the MC warns Madeleine to stay away from Hana...and even there, the MC just says she did "mean things". Which is the mildest possible way I have seen of someone describing a person who gloated about breaking Hana. Like the word "hazing" from the previous book, all these vague references leave it to the readers' faint memories, or imagination, to figure out what Madeleine did.

But all of these are just hints at best, and most of what we could assume of the writers' intentions came largely from guesswork. There was constantly a sense of something not being right, but many of us at the time couldn't completely articulate it. That is, until Ch 16, and only if we pressed a specific option in the Vegas diamond scene, in just Hana's playthrough:

Unlike the previous scenes - which were mostly attempts to obfuscate the events of the previous book - this scene replaces what actually happened with blatant lies. Not only does it wipe out entirely what Madeleine did, replacing it with a casual comment from Hana about her "fun side", it also smears Kiara for something she didn't do at all during the bachelorette (for clarity, Kiara found out she was a great dancer, and looked quite annoyed if the MC chose a wrong dialogue option as an excuse to see her card. The MC never saw her lashing out at Penelope during this event). Even if the MC and Hana were so drunk that night that they wouldn't remember events clearly (which isn't how they're depicted at all when the "chocolate incident" took place), it wouldn't be replaced with things that never actually happened. The writers were more than ready to throw Kiara under the bus to make Madeleine look better, and have those lies come out of Hana's mouth (and mind you, Hana liked Kiara so much she chose her to be her MoH in Ch 18 of her playthrough, so it can't even have been spite towards Kiara on her part).

In contrast, Penelope is allowed to be open about Madeleine's mistreatment of her. In fact she cites it as the main reason for her reluctance to return to court, and even complains at the MC if the latter asks her if she didn't get the memo on the bachelorette dress code in TRR3 Ch 16 ("oh no, no, it's like Madeleine all over again!"). The group is required to protect her from Madeleine; in Ch 4, when Penelope is upset at the very sight of Madeleine, Drake comes to her rescue and reassures her ("She's with us, Penelope. We won't let her bite."). While Madeleine herself is protected from any consequences for what she did to Penelope (besides an optional tiny jibe in Ch 4), the MC and her group are required to reassure her that they will never allow it to happen again. In a very disgusting contrast, the narrative pushes Hana at the forefront of the diamond scene with Madeleine, without ever considering her comfort or safety around the person who wanted to break her. Not only does the group involve her without ever asking her if she wants to be part of it - Drake and Maxwell safely distance themselves when the time comes for Madeleine to speak personally about her troubles, and the MC can choose not to be sympathetic in certain dialogue options. Which means that the onus to comfort and persuade her is largely on Hana's shoulders. We must also remember that, unlike Penelope, Hana is deprived of the full truth of Madeleine's intentions in the last book too.

Where the writers were ready to at least admit that Madeleine's behaviour affected Penelope deeply, they went to the extent of completely rewriting the narrative of her TRR2 bachelorette to erase what she put Hana through.

The "Romance" in TRR3

(First four screenshots from my playthroughs, next four from the Adventure...Romance...Thrills YouTube Channel, and the final row's screenshots from the Annabelle Lee YouTube channel and the Skylia YouTube channel)

The Hana and Madeleine "romance" is hinted at in 5 scenes (4 in other playthroughs, and just one in Hana's own). As with most of the other romances, Madeleine's feelings are the most prominent. To the more romance-coded overtures, Hana's reaction is usually shock and disbelief, with a small suspicion over whether Madeleine is doing this to trick her into humiliation later. But the narrative gives her very little opportunity to even talk about anything related to Madeleine, especially anything negative. You do have a scene at the finale that is meant to provide closure, but not in a romantic way. This scene is very different from the others, and in some ways puts an end to the possibility of this relationship happening anytime soon.

How did we get from those scenes to this final one in Ch 22? It would be useful to look at the scenes, within the timeline of TRR3's release and with the context of fandom reactions.

1. The "Cordonia's Most" Scene (Ch 3)

This diamond scene is written to give the MC/reader a bit of background on Madeleine's past and family, which will prove useful later when she has to convince the Amaranths to fix their relationship with each other. It is set against the background of a drinking game where an asker can quiz everyone else about who would be the most likely to do a particular action. Hana references Madeleine twice in the game (in a very complimentary manner), and Madeleine references Hana once. It was her comment about Hana being "stupidly sweet and perfect" that caught the attention of some readers and made them wonder if that was the route PB was planning to take with Hana. This dialogue shows up in Hana's route as well.

In later chapters, we see instances of Hana trying to include Madeleine in group activities...such as in Ch 6 where she invites the latter to come with them to the spa after the football match with Jiro and Camellia.

2 and 3. Cross-Referencing Each Other at Costume Gala (Ch 9)

This is a very interesting development, at an equally interesting time. Around the time Ch 9 released (end-April 2018), PB announced that TRR's team would be taking a hiatus, mostly to work on "some exciting stuff" during that break. It also gave them the time to work on certain things the fandom was demanding, and do away with others due to stan vitriol (Kiara's attraction towards Drake being one of them). The next chapter would only appear a month and a half later (mid-June).

Ch 9 sneaked in a scene that hinted at Hana and Madeleine as a romance option, but in a way that made it very hard for players to notice on a casual read. The scene is split in two parts: the MC can choose to speak to either Hana and Olivia, or Maxwell, Justin and Madeleine. Hana and Olivia's scene shows the two commenting on Gala outfits, which kickstarts a conversation about diplomacy vs bluntness. The latter option explores a variety of topics, mostly revolving around an appreciation for Madeleine's "great work".

Both Hana and Madeleine reference each other in their scenes. Hana's dialogue depends on whether the MC is her fiancèe or not; in other playthroughs, she admires Madeleine's costume, the compliment on her good looks very personal. In her own playthrough, she compliments Kiara's outfit but in a more distant fashion ("subtle and clever, just like her...very well-chosen"). In Madeleine's scene (which is the same across playthroughs), the ending involves her telling the MC to "send my regards to Hana", in response to which she can choose a line of questioning (which ranges from "protective towards Hana" to largely indifferent. In all three options, thankfully, the MC can close with "don't let me catch you antagonizing her", but that really is one small mercy in a pile of blatant retconning.

What marks Hana's dialogue about Madeleine as an LI-specific option, is that she says something entirely different if the MC is getting married to her. This is an indication that the dialogue was intended to be read as romantic, and that it couldn't be said by an LI who was already in love and ready to marry the MC. Pretty much in the same way that Olivia in Liam's playthrough cannot hold his hand in Applewood or dance with him in Vegas.

I wrote an essay on this at the time - both on the possibility of the pairing and why it was a bad idea - and the overall response I received at the time was mixed. Those who remembered exactly what went down at Madeleine's bachelorette and weren't her fans hated the prospect, but some weren't as convinced and some refused to believe it would happen. So there was some pushback for it, citing Madeleine's "chocolate incident" (thankfully, since there were players who had forgotten about it), but it was very low-key and didn't gain much traction.

4. An Offer to Dance in Vegas (Ch 16)

The most obvious indication of Hana and Madeleine being a romantic possibility was in the Vegas chapter. It was impossible to miss for people who didn't romance Hana. This scene, again, featured only in playthroughs where Hana wasn't getting married - which meant that many Hana-romancers didn't get to know of this pairing unless they were told by a friend or saw any such posts on their dash (some even found out years later, to their shock and dismay).

The mild pushback from Ch 9 resulted in a scene where the writers could be emboldened to continue writing this pairing, but confirm (in the vaguest possible way) that Madeleine treated Hana badly. Madeleine's non-apology "apology" really reads more like an attempt to get into Hana's pants than actual regret, and is followed by a reaction from Hana that is confusing in its mildness. Hana is surprised at the offer to dance, asking Madeleine whether she's trying to trick her. While the mild suspicion is a slight improvement from Hana's fulsome praise and enthusiastic attempts to involve Madeleine in group stuff in previous chapters, it still downplays what Hana suffered at Madeleine's hands by making her present the weakest, most milquetoast examples of "fooling someone", examples that pale miserably in comparison to what Madeleine actually put Hana through.

With both the "stupidly sweet and perfect" dialogue and this scene, you'll notice that Madeleine is not only the one who initiates the conversation, but is also the only one with an actual voice in these exchanges. Forget having an opinion on whether she wants to have anything to do with Madeleine or not - the narrative doesn't even give poor Hana the opportunity to properly react beyond mere shock.

There was a stronger reaction to this scene than to the Ch 9 one, because it was way more visible (though you could avoid it just by letting Madeleine stay in her hotel) with Madeleine's romantic intentions on full display. Her asking Hana for a dance immediately after the no apology made it pretty obvious. Players who didn't see the Ch 9 scenes or who didn't believe the divergences meant anything, now couldn't deny that this was positioned as an alternative romance. Additionally by this time, those who forgot about the "chocolate incident" did get reminded of the exact scene, so the vagueness with which Madeleine "addressed" her actions in TRR2 felt criminally inadequate for a number of readers.

Most of us, however, didn't know about the retcon in Hana's Vegas scene, until years later. Those who didn't do Hana's playthrough would have had no idea, and those who did more likely chose the more romantic options.

5. "Jealous?" (Ch 20)

This scene is unique in that the option shows up across all playthroughs, but the specific reaction only shows up in two of them. It's understandable that Hana stans would have missed this - the dialogue is an option, the response is very fleeting and you would have to look through the same option in other playthroughs to recognise the variations.

In the cases of both Drake and Maxwell, Madeleine's response to this jibe from the MC is "ugh, please". Dismissive, almost mocking the idea that she would have any interest in them. In Liam's and Hana's cases, she appears shocked for a minute, then composes herself and gives a more neutral response ("I...I refuse to dignify such a ridiculous question with a response"). In Liam's case, one can safely assume that even though she had no romantic interest in him, she was still on the verge of marrying Liam and that alone would make the situation awkward. In Hana's case there is really no other reason for her to feel that awkward besides having lingering feelings that she cannot suppress.

While this version of the scene doesn't feature in playthroughs where she is single at all, it's still a very strong indicator of authorial intent. Even in the face of backlash against the pairing, the writers clearly wanted to continue hinting at the possibility, if they were slipping in hints of Madeleine's feelings for Hana as late as Ch 20 (just two chapters before the finale). The most plausible theory for this inclusion would be that the backlash was a lot more than it was after Ch 9, but not entirely enough to do away without the pairing completely...yet.

6. "I Wanted To Break You" (Ch 22)

No one knows what happened between Chs 20 and 22, and there's little I can think of that would account for such a quick change in such a short span of time. The finale has a scene featuring Hana and Madeleine, that begins by drawing more obvious parallels between the two women and their families (until now, the parallels were not as pronounced. It's not exactly a great parallel to begin with, since Madeleine has at least one supportive parent and doesn't get punished to the extent that Hana has been, if she openly protests against her parents' methods. But in TRR3 the narrative sometimes does use Hana's toxic parental situation as a parallel to garner sympathy for Madeleine's).

However, once the parents are out of the picture, the attention then turns to Hana and Madeleine, setting the stage for either a romantic confession or a full apology. This time, canon opts to go for the latter.

Unlike all the others, this scene is bluntly specific not just about what Madeleine did but what exactly her intentions were. It has her use the word "break"; it has her actually say the word "sorry". It allowed Hana, for the first time, to fully hear the truth about the harm Madeleine planned to wreck on her. And most importantly, it also allowed Hana her own voice in response to Madeleine's revelations, making it very clear to her that her forgiveness needed to be earned, over a period of time.

The dialogues used to talk about Madeleine's bachelorette in the finale are poles apart from the language they'd used earlier ("hazing", "put my ladies through their paces", "mean things", "refuse to coddle", "wronged"). The finale scene was a more accurate return to the original language and purpose of that bachelorette scene. In fact it sounds less like what canon had been attempting to gaslight their readers into believing thus far, and even seemed to borrow verbatim from the language of the readers who closely followed this issue.

One could call it a good closure scene on the surface level...but there are many, many problems with it.

One was the reaction of the MC. Her angry "excuse me?" in response to Madeleine's confession is still a very obvious retcon. It may have been done to preserve the myth that the MC is a good friend/wife to Hana, but reads as extremely dishonest when you remember that canonically, the MC knew the truth about Madeleine's intentions the whole time and just chose to leave Hana in the dark. It's an attempt to make the MC seem protective that ultimately rings false.

Another is the excuse Madeleine gives for why she targeted Hana. "I wanted to push Hana too far, and for her to drop the nice-girl act once and for all! Only, it isn't an act, is it?" My response when I first read this was "if Hana was faking it...so what. So fucking what. Who was she harming". Coming from the reigning queen of duplicity herself, Madeleine is really not in a position to be judging anyone for putting up a front. This also ties into the hollowness of the motives PB tried to belatedly cook up for TRR2 Madeleine's bullying - no matter what canon says to whitewash her actions, her attempts achieved nothing, did no good for Cordonia, and would likely have led to a very fractured court if the Unity Tour was held while she was queen.

Ultimately, the possibility of this pairing becoming canon was laid to rest in the final chapter. One could interpret Madeleine's promise of a starting gesture ("know that if anyone at court gives you trouble, I can make them regret it") as a possible opening to something more, but considering the earlier backlash, that was unlikely.

TRH - Madeleine Gets The Penelope Treatment, Hana Gets Her Entire Childhood History Retconned.

An interesting development that came up when TRH dropped was the departure of Jeffrey Herdman from the team, most likely because he was heavily involved in the writing of its Renaissance-era spin-off The Royal Masquerade. He would return, by TRF (he is part of their finale livestream), but by then his pet favourite character was likely gone.

TRH has a different set of circumstances, and different power dynamics. The MC is settled into marriage and trying for a child, the LIs are working in the council, Olivia is upgraded to cosplaying spymaster and the side characters go on with their lives. The first book of TRH seemed to do a surface-level recognition of some of the complaints certain readers had in previous books, but their favourites and the people who wouldn't get much attention or appreciation, remained the same.

TRH1 was a time when the writers praised Hana and claimed in a livestream that she was the kind of LI they would love to marry, but also where they gave her a condition that (inaccurately) made her unable to safely carry children (just for the MC to be the mother of the heir) and forced her to be immediately okay with that fate. As the sequel series progressed over the course of 4 books, the erasure of all that Hana was in the past was subtle and insidious - the narrative often compared her to Olivia and found her lesser, she was never allowed to even mention her home place China and worst of all - the writing completely retconned the emotional abuse she suffered at home by claiming it emerged from loving protection, from wanting to keep their daughter away from a cult. And even though Hana's discovery of her sexuality was described by Kara as a "journey that she's still on", no attempts were ever made to show her exploring what she likes romantically, or to show her dating. We don't know if she's involved with anyone, we don't know where she lives, we learn very little of her interests beyond what benefits the MC at any given moment, and the narrative never fails to remind us that they like Olivia more than they like her. Hell, they still encourage Olivia to keep insulting and degrading Hana! Hardly the behaviour of writers who love a character so much they would marry them irl, honestly.

On the other hand, Madeleine wasn't very prominent in TRH1, but gained notoriety in the next two books. The first book has her occasionally engage in inappropriate, invasive badgering of the MC to get pregnant quickly, and she continues to pretend that her doing whatever she likes without ever consulting the person in charge is professional behaviour (eg. Setting up the presscon about the MC's pregnancy announcement. She never even considers whether the MC would be comfortable announcing this pregnancy or not at this time). She gets to deliver a small bit of foreshadowing in the second half of the book (an early hint about Queen Eleanor's pregnancy, though Madeleine's awareness of it hardly makes sense when you look at the entire TRH series, and it never comes up as a point again). Her father being exposed as the traitor who poisoned the former queen builds up to a storyline that benefits her the most in the long run.

Hana is given one chapter where she can call Madeleine out on her entitlement (Savannah's bachelorette). She doesn't insult or berate Madeleine in TRH1 Ch 7, but is refreshingly no-nonsense and will not put up with Madeleine's constant whining about an event she had invited herself to. It's a small, cold comfort, since Hana's actions here are tied to making Savannah's bachelorette a success rather than for herself - but it's still gratifying to see Hana in a position where she can call people out without having to worry about the repercussions. Especially when the narrative disrespects Hana in so, so many other ways for the rest of the series.

In the same chapter, the ladies of the court are given an opportunity to talk about their love lives. Of the four, two women can speak about the people they like (Penelope about Ezekiel by default, and Olivia about Liam if you choose), and one only mentions him by name if the MC is married to someone else (Kiara, about Drake, if you choose to ask her over Madeleine). Madeleine doesn't mention anyone at all, insisting that marriage is something she will only consider for the benefit of her country or estate. This was a relief to players who feared that PB might attempt to push the possibility of romance between Madeleine and Hana again.

Though Madeleine doesn't get the romance that PB so desperately wanted to gift her in the last series, and she isn't given any further romances...the narrative clearly wasn't done pandering to her, even though Jeffrey was not officially a part of the team.

Remember how in the previous essay, we explored the levels to which PB encouraged players to coddle Penelope? Entire chapters would be spent just making her feel comfortable and safe, in encouraging her to help us. No actual initiative or enthusiasm from her end, even if her actions caused the problem or there were lives and reputations at stake. No, Penelope's comfort and happiness should be front and center.

Now think of that treatment, but on steroids and lasting for two whole books. That's what Madeleine's story - starting from TRH2 - looks like.

TRH1 ends with the reveal that Madeleine's father, Godfrey, was involved in the assassination of Liam's mother Eleanor. So a certain amount of narrative focus on Madeleine was expected, perhaps. But the second book doesn't stop at just that.

We are not merely asked to be kind to Madeleine. No, kindness towards Madeleine is expected of us. The warning issued in TRH2 Ch 4 promises "consequences", which means we know straight off the bat that we will be punished if we're not nice enough. It insists we take note of her "fragile state", and give her the mercy and compassion she had never given to anyone in her court.

To give Madeleine the smallest of credits, she acknowledges this just two chapters prior to the oath ("in the past, our positions were once reversed and I was...unkind to you. I had no reason to expect any kindness from you..."). However, this admission does sound disingenuous in the face of the narrative's implicit demand that we treat her nicely. Because if she did recognise her own past behaviour in TRR2 esp as hurtful, and herself as not exactly deserving of kindness, then it makes no sense for her to judge people for behaving exactly as she expected. A genuine redemption arc would have been one where she understood no one owed her kindness after what she'd done, and still determinedly forged ahead to do good for her country. After all, the narrative wanted us so badly to believe this woman was patriotic, right? If her "patriotic spirit" was so tied to her ego that you needed to pamper and praise her every five minutes, just for her to not support such an obviously-foolish tyrant as Bartie Sr, then it can't have been as strong as canon so vehemently claimed.

TRH tracks our "treatment" of Madeleine over 2 books and 10 distinct scenes. Of these, 6 scenes allow us to choose between kind responses and unkind ones, 2 others require the player to choose one among multiple options of people, and 2 scenes are check-in dialogues rather than actual choices (which means that the player doesn't choose an option, they just find out through such scenes whether they are winning Madeleine's favour or not). I imagine that the first category is the most important, with the second being options that you don't necessarily need to choose Madeleine for if you want to go for one of the others, as long as you pressed enough "kind" options.

To elaborate, here's the breakdown:

Kind/Unkind Responses

- House Amaranth's pledge (TRH2 Ch 4). Notably, the "most hurtful" one doesn't even accuse her of anything - it just tells her that the family needs to earn back the Crown's trust. Compare that to Madeleine's accusations to Hana that she was trying to kill her and deserved to lose her position in court. You know, the cruel treatment that some Madeleine stans claimed "wasn't that bad".

- Carrying the Heir's train at Anointing Ball or not (Ch 5)

- Deciphering Madeleine's conversation with Godfrey on his boat (ie whether she is betraying or helping the MC) (Ch 6)

- Acknowledging Madeleine's help in capturing Godfrey, at the Gratitude Ball (Ch 7)

- Gently encouraging Madeleine into being Penelope's bridal attendant, rather than mocking her (TRH3 Ch 2). There is no longer any need to acknowledge Penelope's earlier fear of Madeleine - we are expected to forget entirely that she was the main reason why Penelope didn't want to return to court in TRR3.

- Trusting Madeleine to help with investigations at Fydelia (Ch 6)

Choosing Among Multiple People:

- Speaking about loyalty before making a pledge to the Heir. Other ladies of the house are also presented as choices (TRH 2 Ch 14)

- Babysitting the Heir during Fox Hunt. Other choices are Regina and Savannah (TRH3 Ch 10)

Relationship Check-in:

- The way Madeleine greets you at Fydelia (Warm Welcome/Cold Front) (TRH3 Ch 6)

- Whether Madeleine helps you escape with the Heir in Ch 13, or allows the child to get kidnapped by Godfrey in Ch 15 (Desparate Times/What Goes Around)

The ending of TRH3 has Madeleine either thriving and inheriting her mother's estate, or being merely fired from her job in Royal Communications (a better punishment would have been to strip the entire Amaranth family of their lands, but I digress). She is notably absent in TRF, possibly because she wasn't entirely very popular to start with and two whole books of coddling her didn't exactly help matters either. As one of the junior writers in the TRF team said, "some people exiled her so..."

The first few opportunities to win her over, notably emerge from attempts Madeleine makes to assure the Crown/MC of House Amaranth's loyalty, and you will find that even at an early stage she expects to be included in sensitive discussions that call for discretion, and to be constantly praised for her efforts. Let me give a reminder, again, that she hardly ever gave any praise to the women working for her, and in fact punished them just to keep them constantly in fear of her.

I know it sounds like I'm labouring too much on this point, but it's important to understand just how much effort the narrative had put into coddling this one woman. Chapters and chapters of branch coding, writing two routes, title cards, dialogues, rewards and consequences.

This is similar to the way the narrative encouraged kindness and sympathy towards Penelope, but it's now over a lengthier period of time and with more drastic consequences. We were required to coddle Penelope over a chapter each in three specific books, or be deprived of her support/help. We are required to constantly shower Madeleine with praise and sweet words over the course of 31 chapters, or she will help an unscrupulous Regent-Elect kidnap our child. She will even openly accept that the only reason she put a mere child through that, was because we weren't nice to her ("Wouldn't you have done the same to me? You've made it abundantly clear you see me as the enemy").

But if the MC deserved a punishment this cruel for just mocking Madeleine at every turn, then what punishments should Madeleine get for what she put her own ladies-in-waiting through? What should she get for planning to "break" one of her courtiers? A second broken engagement doesn't seem entirely enough by such parameters.

Then again - as I said before, the narrative deliberately shifted the goal posts for what a potential royal could and couldn't get away with, in the time between Madeleine's engagement tour and the MC's marriage, for this very reason. So that Madeleine would never have to face the kind of constant censure the MC and Liam would face regularly. Among characters in canon, or among largely biased stans in the fandom. Speaking of which...

Fandom

Madeleine's popularity has always been a mixed bag, ever since TRR2. By TRR2, there were people who loved her for what they thought were her craftiness and wiles, some who suspected her to be involved in the plot against the MC, and a number of Liam stans had reactions that ranged from stanning, to indifferent (after all, both Liam and Madeleine showed a mutual disinterest towards each other), to slightly jealous (after all, she was still his fiancée).

But it was Madeleine's treatment of Hana in Ch 7 that definitely crossed a line for quite a few. It was so unwarranted, and her justification for this act so inarguably cruel, that it turned several people off her immediately. The way canon dealt with this was to make her feature less in the story until the memory of the "chocolate incident" was faded and almost forgotten, and then encourage fans to sympathize with her.

The gamble definitely worked, with plenty of help from hardcore Madeleine stans who often downplayed what happened to Hana ("a prank", "making Hana cry just once" were some of the terms used to describe it). By TRR3, I recall having to remind some of my mutuals what actually happened in this scene - their own recollections of it were that vague. The Hana and Madeleine ship would have died a far quicker death if more people remembered this incident as it was shown, and not as narrative wanted us to remember it (and also, if more people cared that it was Hana being hurt, rather than their fave white girl/boy).

Madeleine gained some popularity among the wlw crowd - a couple of them did have a soft spot for stoic, aggressive or women often labelled as "bitchy" (I know a few who also showed a similar amount of love for ACOR's Xanthe or BB's Priya, to be fair...but the adulation for the white female antagonists was a lot more), and Madeleine clearly fit that bill.

A point that often came up from Madeleine stans who were wlw (and reiterated with other mean-girl characters) was that grey-shaded and villanous male characters weren't subject to as much censure as their favourites were. While there is truth to such an argument, it fails to take into account the role race often plays in the way some "mean" women are loved and certain others are scorned. Madeleine clearly did not have the scale of hate that a Xanthe or even a Kiara (who isn't even on the same level) got. In fact when it suited them, many in the fandom were more than ready to view Madeleine as a victim when Liam broke his engagement with her.

Madeleine's "patriotism" - as I've now clearly established - was a retcon made to erase the worst aspects of her characterization. Sometimes it was used to make people feel sorry for her losses, other times it was made to cover up her actual behaviour in TRR2. But there were very few readers who didn't consider it an undeniable fact. Even among those who were indifferent towards her. For instance, in an anon ask that compared Madeleine and QB's Poppy, a poster responded that "the difference between the two was that Madeleine had a sense of duty, and Poppy was just petty". In TRH3, players who claimed that "we can all agree Madeleine is fully redeemed" when she worked with the MC to protect the child from Bartie Sr, stayed mysteriously silent when the other consequence (her helping in the child's kidnapping because she didn't like the MC's pettiness) showed up.

And while these responses could be attributed to the way canon gassed Madeleine up in TRR2 and 3, some of these players had no problem nitpicking the political savvy or work of certain other (CoC) characters, esp Liam (often bashing them for "throwing parties every day", even though the general populace was depicted as being happy with their rule and influence. Mind you, no prompting from PB was necessary to bash these characters). So why were these parameters never applied to Madeleine? Why was practically no one asking what the political relevance of her bullying (as future Queen) was, or why we were expected to sing her praises for poor time management or terrible work ethics towards her boss, or ask what work she actually did in canon as Royal Comms Director? (There is a reference or two to the position, but you aren't shown that many instances of her doing much work). For quite a few, the fact that she walked around with a job title in TRH was more than enough (somehow Kiara never got this kind of fandom treatment despite being part of the Diplomatic Liaisons department).

How does this adulation for such a heavily retconned character, affect the way the Hana and Madeleine ship was viewed? For one, it meant that readers bought into the retcons easily enough that Hana's pairing with her was seen as an extension of her "redemption arc" by some.

Take the example of the various posts that argue in favour of this pairing, or fic that features them as a couple - a lot of them center Madeleine: her pain, her history, her reasons, the correctness of giving her a reward. Hana is barely mentioned or given much attention in these arguments - and often when she has any sort of voice, it is only there to humanize Madeleine. Supporters of this pair often took stances that were either ready to throw Hana under the bus, act like she hardly mattered, or treat her like some sort of blank slate to scribble their adulation for Madeleine over.

Hana is often viewed as less worthy of a focus - she is often the benevolent saint who forgives Madeleine because she "worked so hard to be better". Often it never matters to get into detail why Hana thought Madeleine earned her forgiveness, what Hana's perspective was, what journey she went through to get such a point. Because if Hana's journey really mattered in such a ship, the most pressing questions would revolve around why Hana should ever trust a person who wanted to break her in the first place. Why she should feel safe around such a person. Why her own friend group wouldn't want to protect her from such a person.

Some readers would bring up their parallels as daughters brought up in families that didn't value them, but neglect to take into account the nuances of those dynamics (Madeleine's mother at least wanted to be supportive, and no matter how bad things got, Madeleine was never in danger of being disowned. Hana was, repeatedly). Nor is it fully honest about how Madeleine was comfortable being a perpetrator of abuse, in contrast to Hana's own deep discomfort with the idea of controlling her partner.

In certain cases, I can maybe see this attitude in fandom emerging from an acceptance of the narrative's retcons as truth. But I also think there were as many readers who were just inclined to liking the mean white girl, and finding justifications and excuses for her behaviour.

Fandom's attitudes towards Hana herself often played a small role in how Hana's end of this story was ignored too. When TRR3 fucked up her arc phenomenally (by rushing her parents' turnaround from disowning her to supporting her in Ch 15), it became popular to view Hana as a lesser character, and the "meaner" white women as better. People who wanted other options for female LI often took their frustrations out on her, calling her "weak", servile and submissive, dismissing her honest accounts of the treatment she faced even from her own parents as "whining". If that was the way people preferred to view her emotionally abusive childhood...then what can one expect from such a fandom when she was being outright bullied?

Fandom was already comfortable with the idea of erasing Hana in their content, or replacing her with either their fave white girl (or an equally white OC esp in their fanfic - but more on that in a future Hana essay). So neglecting to center her in what would have been her only canonical alternative romance wouldn't be too difficult for some people.

Which merits the question...is there a way to write about (or write fic for) such a pairing, in a way that centers Hana, respects her story, makes it clear that she has the right to never forgive Madeleine no matter what she does to "earn" it - if that was what she wanted? I highly doubt it. You'd have to completely change Madeleine for that to happen, and that would more likely result in a situation where you were too busy working on her as a character, to give Hana the attention and focus she deserved.

And that's a real pity, because there's plenty to explore about Hana if you actually take the effort to look.

Conclusion

In a lot of ways, once the team had decided upon making Madeleine into a more positive character, they tried to draw a little from Olivia's arc to replicate its success. You can see some of these parallels in the way TRR2 structured the bachelorette as a semi-callback to the childhood- reveal-mocking-Savannah sequences in TRR1 Ch 7. Both chapters gave you reasons to start seeing these women in a different light, while still feeling free to dislike them. In both chapters they also targeted LIs - the only difference was that Drake's diamond scene post that confrontation centered him, and Hana's parallel diamond scene a book later...centered everyone else.

That attempt in TRR2 didn't work for several reasons - the timing wasn't right, Madeleine's cruelty had gone too far for some, the retconning hoodwinked quite a few people but not enough.

So when they tried to pair her up with the victim of her bullying, and twisted canon to make it happen - enough readers emerged to call it out, enough people pushed back by Ch 16, and the possibility of this alternative pairing garnered enough dislike that not only did the writers have to backtrack, but they also had to wipe away their past retcons and write in a scene where Madeleine gave Hana the full, unvarnished truth about the "chocolate incident". Hana was, thankfully, given a chance to give Madeleine her most polite "no".

And although that ship would never be brought up again, the team (even without Madeleine's top writer Jeffrey) still attempted to make pampering and uncritically praising her a narrative priority. She gained a bit more popularity during this time period - quite a few were inclined to feel sorry for her (especially considering the way her father's crimes affected her social standing) and saw only what happened if you were consistently nice to her.

But there was also a significant section of people who were tired of the constant coddling, and who didn't like that it was demanded of the player (when there were far more deserving WOC in the same book, who didn't get this level of kindness). It was significant enough that Madeleine wasn't given any scenes in the final book, and the writers cited her lack of popularity as a reason why.

As a Hana fan myself, it was a relief to see Hana not be paired up with her bully. But it was also immensely disheartening for me to see that "ship" get as far as it did, and to see the narrative do so much more work for Madeleine, than they did for Hana even in the follow up series. It was even more disheartening to see so many in fandom follow suit.

--

By now, we have explored 3 out of the 4 alternative pairings that TRR put forward for the LIs. They all vary in terms of buildup, attention, and payoff. But there are several things that are common about them. They all have either significant histories with the LI, or the narrative thinks they share something in common. The moment an "alternative" option ends up harming the MC, they are no longer suitable as an option because of the LI's loyalty towards her.

But perhaps the most common factor among the three women we have explored so far is how the LI is expected to treat the alternate, no matter how jealous the MC is allowed to get, no matter what the alternate themselves may have done in the past. The alternate is supposed to be treated well. With respect, with kindness, with compassion.

Betrayal doesn't allow an LI to treat their alternate badly. Bad behaviour doesn't allow an LI to treat their alternate badly. Disregarding consent doesn't allow an LI to treat their alternate badly. Classism doesn't allow an LI to treat their alternate badly. Not loving them back doesn't allow it either. Not even extreme levels of bullying...allows an LI to disrespect them.

In the next essay, we will see if any of these rules apply to our last alternative LI - Kiara.

Next: Drake and Kiara.

[mskinkyafro]

The Natasha switch up is CRAZY.

I feel like I need it to be explained to me like I’m stupid bc I’m having a hard time with understanding how she’s snakey for chatting and pursuing Stefan.

Especially, if 👏🏾you 👏🏾don’t 👏🏾want 👏🏾him. 👏🏾

*And this RANT is for people who didn’t even choose Stefan or want him. Bc I’m seeing most of this take with them. Vs someone who is on her route. Natasha Stan’s I feel for you. It sucks.

I keep seeing three big reasons why she’s the “worst.”

1) She’s obsess with Mc and Stefan. And gladly is second best to Mc/wants Mc’s leftovers.

Okay, in order to relate it and make common ground with Mc is to tell us that “hey, we were both the same season. Except I was a casa girl. And oop, we might have similar taste, I tried grafting/dating your ex but he was so into you.”

“And overall, y’all appeared so perfect and cute. I admired your relationship and want to have a relationship like yours or have someone be that interested in me.”

(if we go off appearances. Bc Mc can say that everything isn’t what it seems. )

Like clearly she is our exposition/lore character to help us understand what is the status quo BUT narratively, you can infer the questioning especially as we get to Casa is to make sure Mc FOR SURE is done with Stefan. Bc let’s be honest. Ppl be seeing their ex’s and old feelings be coming up.

And they all here for a second shot at love. Plus she has history with Stefan, whether you believe it’s as strong as Mc and his, is beside the point. It’s Casa and she’s single, and he is too. She has the right to explore that.

2. If you’re on a Stefan route, she pulls him for chats knowing I’m interested.

Once again it’s love island. Step your pussy game up if you’re scared of competition. Like it’s chats, BFFR why are we acting like she’s stealing your man, being so vicious and talking bad and sabotaging you behind your back.

I feel like there’s nothing wrong with having chats and still exploring ALL available options.

I get the argument of “if we been spending most of the time with one li, why should she step in and talk to him.”

But at that point it’s the final chats before recoupling, I see no harm in getting final graft time or check in with all casa boys and villa girls to make sure you didn’t overlook anyone. It’s no different than the casa boys, trying to sell Mc about themselves before recoupling. Is that them moving snakey? (to Marshall in my game) And either way, Mc always chooses before Nat so you can still choose him. She can’t fuck you over.

3. It’s just shady behavior how she’s moving bc shes’s been pressuring us about him and saying we are couple goals. But she turns around and grafts and brings him back. Why not just say you want him from the jump?

We as in-game characters didn’t know he was coming back. I mean I feel like it goes without saying she was interested in him from their season. But it was pointless. So fast forward now, idk about others but her talking with him before and after our own clear the air chat. That was clear she is going for him. Go for it girl, I can’t be mad. I don’t want him. And it’s no girl code rule break bc she didn’t even know Mc before this show.

I ain’t gonna hold her to some dumbass standard when we all signed up for a show where we are literally sharing men. I just fail to really see the snake behavior.

To me it differs from Kat who takes your li unprovoked for a chat and heavily tries to flirt and make moves just because. Knowing damn well she’s full of hell and just wants to make her partner jealous, and she chooses yours because she respects Mc the least. 😭

Now if Nat was moving like that with Stefan or your li you actually wanted. We could talk, but girlie literally did what she’s supposed to do on the show.

Make a connection, lock it in and is bring him back. Idk I just find more and more of these overreactions in the fandom so annoying and exhausting from players.

Like damn no one can be competition no more. No one wants to work for their Li affection. They all should worship the ground Mc walks on and never acknowledge any other girl ever. It’s boring af.

Final thing, which just speaks to her overall personality or character traits. Some are holding on to her “shit talking” from the PDA Awards.

But was she wrong?! No! Kat IS and ALWAYS will be ANNOYING and a whiny ass bitch.

Calling Kelly basic was shots fired and Kelly def caught a stray but I mean…Kelly does have more of simple vibe compared to everyone else who embodies the *That bitch* energy. Still all love for Kelly though.

Like y’all please. The “shit talking” was some of the most tamest shit ever. And let’s be for real, if Mc said this shit or has options to be even more bitchy or cuntier, we call them all kinds of Queens, Savages, and Icons. But with Natasha she’s shady.

I’m sorry I REFUSE to let y’all slander Natasha. She be riding for Mc. Remember she was one of the only ones on our side during the PDA debacle with Finn. Whether you did mess with him or not. Like Natasha is a rider.

Even with the drama that Melissa brought, that was Melissa twisting things to be messy. Not Natasha trying to be hurtful. Idc this rant was for her bc I hate how yall switching up on my girl. It’s WILD!

[2d-reality]

Study Buddy

characters: Satan, GN!MC content/warnings: Satan being a smarty-pants and helping you with Devildom Law. You also ponder about him... Fluff <3 word count: 2606 notes: Not only did I not edit this past halfway, the edibles kicked in towards the end. IF you can tell no you can't.

RAD was the single evilest thing Diavolo had ever done. High school, eternally. You weren’t a fan of high school (or high schoolers, for that matter) when you were in it, and the further you progressed past it, the more grateful you were that it was over. 

As if being chucked on your head into the Devildom wasn’t bad enough, on top of everything that had happened over the last year and a half, you were forced to endure the hell that was everything about traditional schooling. Getting up in the morning, making sure you hadn’t forgotten any assignments, navigating the cavernous, echoing halls of RAD, sitting through lectures on topics you still didn’t entirely grasp, making sure what the cafeteria served wouldn’t cause you a painful death, student council meetings, homework... the list went on. Even the student body behaved like high schoolers. Albeit they were magically adept, inhuman high schoolers who could float through the hallways or burn their desks to ashes, but they cliqued and gossiped just the same.

You were thankful, at least, that Lucifer had gone out of his way to ensure you were accompanied by one of his siblings at all times. Though your class roster changed every semester (Diavolo’s way of freshening up the classrooms, lest some of RAD’s less than amiable students get too unbearably annoyed with each other), you were seated beside one of your guardian demons in each lecture hall. 

You were particularly thankful for Satan being your seatmate in your Devildom Law course. The emerald-eyed fourth-born was smart as a whip, and the reputation surrounding his hair-trigger temper meant even those students around you who were not afraid of a lifetime detention sentence didn’t try anything untoward when the two of you were together. 

Home Ec, Art, and even Mathematics you could shoulder well enough, but the additional Devildom-centric courses had thrown you for a loop. Magical Potions was much like Chemistry, at times, and Seductive Speechcraft could arguably be studied just as easily by watching political debates or taking a mid level Psych class. Curses and Hexes had grown on you, the Anti-Lucifer league’s help notwithstanding, but Devildom Law had you absolutely, hopelessly lost. 

You weren’t keen on politics much back in the human realm, having never really grasped the contrived flannery of things that seemed really very simple-- betterment for the good of all, and what have you, but humans were just... prejudiced like that, you supposed. Demons were, pun not intended, a completely different breed. For one, they lacked any amount of urgency in their decision making. When one lives for thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of years, one apparently doesn’t feel much need for speed and efficiency. It was a little difficult to have a research project ongoing for upwards of a hundred years when you hadn’t even been around for a blink of that time. Secondly was the caste system. Demons were sorted, it appeared, by very rigid standards-- their point of origin, be that parent or manifestation, age, their physical and magical power, and their scope of influence in both the Devildom and the human realm.

The longer you spent around the brothers, the more you realized just how powerful they were, and not just physically (that you were well aware of), but socially-- and politically. The student council ruled as pretty damn close to a governing body, even if it was dressed down with an innocuous name. Occasionally, you would be reminded that Levi was a Navy leader, that Lucifer was the very backbone of Devildom society, and Mammon made quick, intelligent financial decisions for RAD and the surrounding realm. 

And yet still, something that always negged at you, they were once angels. Stories would fall from them every now and again, quips at each other about their time in the Celestial Realm, and though they were no longer, there seemed to be some innate intricacies of demon behavior that they didn’t quite fully... get. Their divinity clung to them still, in little ways that weren’t always apparent.

Satan, on the other hand, had always been a demon. He had told you once, after a quiet, intimate night, that he sometimes felt out of place amongst his brothers. How he felt undeserving of his rank, how sure he was that the only reason he had been sorted in the middle and not on the tail end was because of just how much sheer power Lucifer bore even after his fall, and how the only reason Satan came to be was because the eldest brother had him violently ripped from his being. How he felt like an ugly, broken thing amongst the shining jewels of the heavens. 

But to you, Satan was a warm ray of sun in this realm of eternal darkness. In learning to quell the overwhelming anger inside himself, he learned how to douse it in others. He was, in your opinion, the most observant out of the seven of them, and the most receptive to your moods. Any time a comment was shot too loudly across the dinner table, or a designer purse was thrown at a target past your head, or someone sidled into your personal space on the couch in the common room, Satan’s eyes were on you, watching. Reading the tension in your shoulders, the change in your expression, the speed at which you switched between apps on your DDD or sighed. He would suggest you join him in clearing the dishes, or happen to remember there was a book he wanted to recommend to you, in his room, if you would, or remind one of his brothers they had things to be doing that didn’t involve buggering you. His presence proved to you that sometimes, things could be calm in this whirlwind.

Which is part of why you appreciated him being in this class with you. The other, sometimes seemingly larger part being the fact that his brain seemed to work twice as fast as yours. He could answer all of your questions without hardly a moment’s pause. You had joked with him once, that his head was a steel trap. 

“Provided something interests me,” he had replied, expression unreadable. You were pretty sure everything interested him.

Satan was the best tutor around for Devildom Law, aside from maybe Diavolo himself. Despite how carefully his acquaintances trod around him, Satan had hundreds of them, in every aspect of the realm you could think of. He was out of the house almost as much as Asmo, attending soirees, launch parties, company milestone celebrations, even somewhat regular dinner parties as a special guest. Satan had an air of familiarity about him to the residents of the Devildom, one that you thought you might recognize in your familiarity with Solomon. Where the other brothers had helped shape humanity, and were now demons, they weren’t human, and had known more than their sins, whereas you and Satan had never known anything more than what you were. You had a kinship with the other human exchange student in a way only two humans could, and Satan had it with other natural-born demons.

He knew designers, nobles in the upper echelons, executive chefs, newspaper editors, bus drivers, and every stray cat in a twenty-mile radius. Some of which you weren’t convinced were just cats. Demons came in all shapes and sizes, after all. 

Your plight for a Devildom Law tutor was helped by the fact that you had managed to endear yourself to the fourth born. Sometimes you could compare his investment into your tutoring sessions to that of a wildlife ecologist teaching an animal to perform simple tricks, but you were willing to take the help wherever you could get it. You had always been an adaptive person, and you would prove everyone in this infernal place that you-- frail, mortal little you-- could. You could handle anything they threw at you. 

Or, you thought as you stared into the print of your Law textbook, that’s what you wanted, at least. The words had long since gone blurry, and your pen had fallen from your hand as you had been lost in thought. Papers were scattered across your desk, some of the edges crinkled under open books, and smudged with highlighter. The screensaver on your laptop had switched on, and you swiped your fingers across the mousepad to wake it. 

The sudden, harsh light made you draw back, and both a shoulder joint and the middle of your back popped. Even with the tableside lamp on, you were getting drowsy. Your class was performing mock trials this semester, and had been split into pairs, with each pair taking on the role of defense or plaintiff for their own trial. Yours and Satan’s turn was later this week, and you felt like you were no closer to gathering your arguments than you were when the whole ordeal was assigned. Of course you weren’t given the exciting embezzlement or human sacrifice (!) cases-- you were stuck with a property dispute between two mid-level demons in the fourth circle. An avarice demon wished to add the property to his swollen scope of dominion, and a prodigality spirit with alleged ties to Dante himself wanted it for its quick-selling real estate tag. 

You were supposed to argue on the behalf of the prodigal Ar’gig. You felt like an unmoored buoy drowning in the reading material you had been given-- most of which you somehow had to translate from its native Infernal, which was another mountain to summit in itself-- and the longer you stared at the sea of papers before you, the more they swam in your vision and truly resembled crashing waves.

You sat back in your desk chair, stretching your creaking body. More joints protest, and your head spins for a moment with the rush of blood. Blinking to clear the spots, you cross your arms over your textbook and rest your head on your forearms. The sigh you heave smells like old paper and ink, and faintly of hopelessness.

Maybe just a few moments... if you closed your eyes, you could visualize better...

~

The book under your head being shifted woke you. You blinked, having not even realized you fell asleep. A flash of chartreuse caught your eye, and you turned your head to see Satan in a chair beside you. He regarded you fondly for a moment, and you realized Satan’s presence wasn’t all that was different. Your papers had been arranged, rescued from under your laptop and textbooks. The computer was sitting to Satan’s left, open programs layered neatly. In his hand was a pen, and the paper sitting in front of him was mostly his clean handwriting. Peering closer, you realized he had written in his own notes below the few scant lines you had started. The page was now nearly full. 

“I thought you said you’d never do my homework for me,” you teased. Satan lifted one shoulder in indifference. 

“Good morning to you, too. This is a group project. Besides, Lucifer said if you don’t do well on this midterm, you’ll not be allowed out of the House until you make up the grade, and I promised Nysrogh that you would be attending his next dinner party. I can’t have you making me look like a liar.”

His tone was clipped, bordering on apathetic, but you saw right through it. It was nothing for Satan to make up an excused absence, and he had always been staunch in his refusal to do any of the actual legwork for you-- something about experience being the best teacher. You didn’t press the matter.

“Clearly you understand this better than I do,” you settled on stating the obvious to steer the conversation in a productive direction. With Satan’s help, you felt like you could actually tread the waves. “Anything I should know? Aside from... all of it?”

Satan pinched his lips in the way he did when he was thinking. “This translation is wrong.” He pointed to a bit of text in the middle of your paltry paragraph of notes. “The original meaning has less to do with Melchom’s prior holdings and more to do with his reputation. It changes the argument slightly.” 

You scrubbed at your face, resting your palms over your eyes. “Infernal is so... infernal.” 

Satan chuckled, reaching out to smooth his cool touch over your hair. “Maybe we could squeeze some lessons in on weekends. I may know a simple speech incantation that could also help.” 

“Only if it’s over coffee,” you bargained, peering through your fingers. You were pleased to see a slight flush come to life on Satan’s nose, and he turned away from you to type something on your computer.

“Deal.” 

“Awesome,” you had meant to say, but instead, out of your mouth tumbled “I love you.” 

Satan’s fingers froze over your laptop. It took him a moment to respond, “I’m not -ahem- not helping you to bargain for your affection--” 

“I know.” You doubled down on the sudden confession, delighting in how flustered it made him, despite it being far from the first time you’d said it. “As if you have to bargain for it in the first place.” 

Satan cleared his throat again and shifted in his seat, but didn’t say anything further. You chewed on how best to express your next thoughts before speaking. 

“I appreciate the effort, nonetheless.” You rested your chin on the heels of your palms and tested the waters a little more. “I don’t think anyone else could help me understand this stuff... aside from Lucifer.”

You caught the flash of Satan’s eyes and bit down on a grin as he ground out, “As if that selfish, patronizing bastard would ever lower himself to tutoring. Nevermind that tutoring actually being of any help.” 

“All of you do more for me than anyone thought you had the capacity for.” You saw Satan’s jaw tick. “But you’re probably right. At any rate, he doesn’t have time to help expand my tiny human comprehension.”

“Your comprehension is perfectly adequate. I love your mind, anyways,” Satan grumbled just over his breath, almost as though he hadn’t meant to say it out loud. He slid your laptop across the desk to you, and placed the page of your combined notes atop the keyboard, as well, speaking with purpose this time. “Let’s test that comprehension. Hopefully I’ve laid this out in a way that’s easier for you to understand. The better you grasp the basics, the better you’ll actually be able to make headway on this project. I won’t have you dragging my grades down with you if we fail this, in addition to making me look like a liar.” 

“Hey,” you whined, crossing your arms over your chest. “What happened to being my hype man?” 

“When, MC, have I ever resembled anything close to a, quote, hype man? Or have you mistaken me for one of my brothers all of the sudden?” 

You chose not to respond to that, save for half-heartedly glowering at your demonic study buddy. “Never figured you would kill a romantic moment like that.” 

The flush returned, but Satan had already begun shifting to teacher mode. “Nysrogh’s dinner party will be plenty romantic. When you pass this. And you ruined it first when you mentioned Lucifer. Now, read, and tell me where we need to start.” 

You huffed, and let your arms fall dramatically to the desk. “Fine. boss. Meter’s running.”  

Satan offered one last charm, accompanied by a fond smile, before you began. “We’ll get you where you need to go.”

[thewritingmagician2022]

Chronically Ill MC - Dateables

As someone with multiple chronic illnesses (including one or two  that’s tried to take me out), fantasy is one of the few things that gets me through my bad days. With that in mind, I was inspired to talk about how the brothers/dateables not only handle dating someone with chronic illness but also what one little thing they do to help.

Lucifer

Lucifer may not seem the like the most empathetic partner to someone with a chronic illness. Lucifer does a lot every day and he expects the same from the people in his life. He keeps high standards and there aren’t many things that will considered a valid explanation for not meeting them, even sickness. However, he’s not totally unreasonable and once he learns how truly sick you are, he dedicates himself to readjusting those standards/goals and makes sure that you aren’t pushing yourself past your limits.  The main thing that Lucifer does to support you as your partner is going to appointments with you. When you’re chronically ill, it’s almost impossible to not have regular appointments, usually with multiple doctors. The other uncomfortable truth about those visits is that the doctors typically aren’t too great. It’s all too easy to get brushed off, talked over, and not taken seriously, especially if you happen to be a female or person of color. Lucifer being there not only calms your anxiety but also makes sure that you are better seen and heard in the appointments. He is not letting that doctor leave without doing their job properly. 

Mammon

Mammon keeps up his typically uncaring personality in front of people where he can tend to tease you or downplay your sickness; however, he is also fiercely overprotective. He doesn’t let anyone else near you and is constant checking in to see if you’ve eaten, slept enough, have everything you need, etc. If anyone bothers you about your illness(es), he’s 100% going after them. You may be a sick, pathetic human but you’re his and he’s not going to let you be slandered by anyone!  As his nice thing that Mammon does for you and your chronic illness(es), is buying you all sort of things that might help. He definitely didn’t google what sort of things to buy your chronically ill partner or anything and then buy everything off those lists, whether or not it applied to your illness(es). Those damn Buzzfeed lists will be the death of Goldie at this point. He makes sure you want for nothing. Most of the time he won’t even give the items to you like a normal person, he’ll just leave them in your room or in your bag or address the box to you as if you’ve ordered it yourself. He doesn’t want you to know how badly he wants to take care of you. 

Levi

Levi is a nervous Nelly, only because he cares. He definitely does some research like Satan, though he’s much more invested in the message boards than doctors studies. He definitely joins a support group for caregivers to get a better idea of what to expect and what he can do for you. He’s happy to always stay home with you when you’re not feeling well; in fact, it really works for his life style if you want to stay comfy and cozy in his bedroom most of the time while he keeps you company/entertains you.  Speaking of which, Levi’s one thing he does for you is keeping a basket full of stuff in his bedroom for you. As a gamer who can hole up in his room for hours (or even days) at a time, he prepares for this. He’s got his little fridge and microwave for you and a large basket of everything you usually need: heated blankets, heating pads, water bottles, medication, arts and crafts, sleep masks and headphones, etc. He’s even got a little gaming station set up for you in there in case you want to play some cozy games when you’re not up to chatting with him but still want something to do “together”. 

Satan

Satan is the king of research. The moment that you open up about your illness(es), he’s taking notes and getting ready. He’s going to spend a lot of time figuring out what’s going on with you, what it means for your human body, and what your treatment options look like. He’s going to be collecting firsthand information from you as well so he knows exactly what your symptoms and daily life are like. He’s that person who will keep a planner with your appointments, manage your medication, and stay completely up to date on any new research that comes out about your illness(es). He’s sort of like your own mini nurse at this point.  For his main supportive trait (as if he doesn’t so enough), Satan is always making sure that you’re utilizing the best coping skills possible. This includes enjoying fresh air and, when possible, getting movement. He sees how much research supports those things, including sunlight and the company of animals. He’ll have a sun light from Akuzon on you while he hangs out with you in the gardens or takes you out on the town for a little walk. If you’re not allergic, he also brings cats to hang out and purr on your lap so you can de-stress while petting them. 

Asmo

Asmo struggles with having a chronically ill partner. It’s not because he doesn’t care but he can be thoughtless about your conditions and he’s someone who always wants to be going out and doing things. Sometimes you have to remind him of your limitations and then he’s going to tone it down and pamper you at home like it’s reason for living. He’s gonna make sure you’re doing all the self-care and whatever you can’t do, he’ll do for you.  For his one special habit, he’s going to take you to the best spas and salons where you can get all of the relaxation that you deserve. You’ve had a long day with him and you’re probably tired and sore so best believe that Asmo has signed you both up for massages and facials and getting your nails done. You’ll be relaxed and ready for a good night’s sleep once they’re finished with you. Asmo seems like he would set up weekly or biweekly visit to these places under the guise of trying out new places/new treatments but really he just wants to make sure you’re being pampered like you deserve and those massages will hopefully help with the body aches.  And if you can’t manage to go out for those things, he’s going to do them all for you at home where you can be as comfortable as possible. 

Beel

Beel can be a little overprotective of his chronically ill partner. He hates the idea of you being sick and suffering; it’s a constant reminder of how delicate and vulnerable you are as a human. It triggers his Lilith PTSD just a little because he’s more afraid of losing you, especially to something that he can’t fight or protect you from. He tends to wait on you hand and foot, and he’s always making sure you’re fed the best foods and drinks the Devildom has to offer so that you keep up your strength. The thing that Beel does for you to support you is provide you with massages and/or pets. As an athlete, Beel knows how important it is to keep the body stretched, soothed, and strong. This means that he’s actually very proficient at giving massages. Beel will lead you through a series of stretching whenever you’re up for it (who would have guessed that he’s so skilled at yoga and not just all muscle?) so that you’re able to get in some kind of daily movement. Then he’ll rub down any sore muscles and work out any kinks that you may have. If there’s a time when you’re so sore you can’t stand any strong touch or movement, Beel is more than happy to rub your back or pet your hair to help soothe you to sleep and keep you calm. 

Belphie

Belphie struggles a bit with a chronically ill partner simply because he is a very sleepy boy which makes him lazy and not totally capable of being a caretaker. He relies on his older brothers for a lot. But the good news is that he does transfer that skill over to you. You both get spoiled quite a bit by the other brothers who have accepted you as someone to be loved and protected the same way they do for Belphie. Additionally, Belphie never makes you feel bad for spending your down time resting. You guys have fun in mellow ways and you don’t have to worry about being fun or entertaining, you can just be yourself.  The best thing about having Belphie as a chronically ill person is that he is the best napping and bed rotting companion out there. You will never have a partner more excited to make sure you’re well rested. Belphie will spend all day with you in bed without a second thought. He’s got movies or music for entertainment, he’s got the comfiest bed and pillows and blankets, he’s got fans and heating pads, he’s got bottles of water on his bedside and snacks too so he doesn’t have to get out of bed for them, he’s got lavender oil to spray to help you get better sleep. You would never be more comfortable anywhere else and he’s going to snuggle you the whole time, assuming you’re up for that. 

Diavolo

Diavolo is a very courteous boyfriend to a chronically ill partner. He’s incredibly busy and he feels terrible that he’s not able to spend more time with you but he’s always happy to have your company while you rest. He lets you sit in on meetings or while he does paperwork. You’re quiet and diligent and he’s so impressed by how much you manage to not only do but do well while you struggle with your illness(es). You get your RAD work done and wrangle the brothers and always make sure to have time for Diavolo even when he’s whiny and cranky. He loves and respects that about you and so he does his best to always show you that same kindness and support.   Diavolo has the habit of sending you gift baskets when he’s not able to be around. They’re full of both treats and necessary supplies so that there’s nothing you could want for. He also lends Barbatos to you. It can’t be all the time unfortunately, since Barbatos has quite a lot of his own work to do, but if there’s any long gaps in your ability to see Diavolo, he makes sure you have Barbatos to keep you company and wait on you hand and foot for at least a few hours. Barbatos is one of the few people Diavolo trusts totally, especially with something as important as you, so you feel special to have him assigned to you. 

Barbatos

Barbatos is such an attentive boyfriend to a chronically ill partner. He’s used to serving Diavolo and essentially being a mixture of servant, nurse, valet, therapist, etc. so stepping into the role of caregiver is natural and easy for him. He relishes the idea of taking care of you. If you’re someone who truly hates the idea, he’ll back off and just play the role of doting boyfriend but, unless you’re actively fighting against it, he’s going to dedicate himself to making sure you’re taken care of. He’ll help with doctors, scheduling, accommodations in the Devildom, and making sure you have ample emotional support, including making sure the brothers aren’t causing you any undue stress.  The one thing Barbatos does for you that he enjoys most and excels at is keeping you well nourished. As we know, Barbatos has an affinity for tea and he has hundreds of kinds from the Devildom, celestial realm, and human realm alike. He will brew you a type for every symptom or illness, and some that may just help your anxiety or help you sleep. He keeps notes of what you enjoy most and stocks up so you have some at the HoL as well. If you hate tea, he will find other beverages or broths that are equally helpful and good for your body. He’s also a fantastic cook and can modify the recipes to anything your body needs. Allergies, intolerances, taste preferences - he takes all of it into account and therefore creates the perfect meals and snacks for you. He regularly sends you home with food and will make sure there’s always something for you at RAD or the palace. It’s the most basic way to care for someone and it makes him feel great to know you’re taken care of.  

Solomon

Solomon is a good partner for someone chronically ill because it’s impossible to phase him. He’s seen it all, all types of illnesses and injuries and accidents. There’s nothing that grosses him out or is too stressful to deal with. He may get a little introspective sometimes because it makes him think about your mortality in comparison to his and he knows that, once upon a time, he may have been just like you. He does his best to make your life as easy as possible, even offering magic items or potions to help. It doesn’t matter if it’s just offering you temporary relief from your symptoms or making a specific task easier for you, as long as he can help, he’s happy. Plus he’s been studying the human body and health for a long time so he’s the most knowledgeable and has a wide variety of options and ideas for you.  Speaking of studying the human body for a long time, Solomon has been conducting his own research and experiments for almost as long. He’s been around for multiple plagues and diseases across the globe and throughout time and, even though they can’t affect him, he’s kept up with the science behind it all. He’s been helping develop cures and vaccines for a long time; regularly passing off his findings to people who can actually put them into action. That means once he knows what’s ailing you, he’s going to turn his focus towards it to see if he can speed up the discovery of a cure. He doesn’t want you to have to suffer for a minute longer than necessary and he’s got every possible resource at his fingertips to help change that for you (and others like you) so he’s going to more seriously dedicate his time and energy towards that goal. 

Simeon

Simeon is the kind of partner who helps you keep your wits about you and keep your spirits up when you’re dealing with chronic illness(es). It’s so easy to get swept up in a chronic illness: the symptoms, the appointments, the doctors, financial responsibilities, socializing, school or work, the future. Sometimes it can feel like you’re drowning and it’s impossible to pull yourself out of the negativity and the hopeless feeling. Simeon is always there to hold out his hand and pull you out of the water with his calm, soothing tone and support and encouragement. He holds your hand every step of the way and brings positivity to your life. He highly encourages you to utilize meditation and gratitude, without pushing so far as to go into toxic positivity. Sometimes he’s the only thing that keeps you holding on.  One of the best ways that Simeon supports you is by helping you with basic tasks that you may be too embarrassed to ask for help with normally, including bathing. Simeon is always happy to run you a hot bath and will put in epsom salts or essential oils or vitamin drops as needed. Hell, even if it’s just for fun, he’s happy to make it a lovely bubbly mess for you to splash around in and relax. He’s the kind of partner who will happily either climb in with you or, if there’s no room, he’ll sit behind you or to the side and help wash your hair, being so careful to keep soap out of your eyes and ears. He’ll wash your back and feet and face, with such smooth and gentle hands as he talks to you so sweetly. If you can’t take a bath, he’ll make sure you have a shower bench/chair or at least him to hold onto while you shower. It’s always the highlight of your day when he does this for you and you feel so close to him. 

[vampxrebarbie]

in an effort to not completely stagnate with my writing and in lieu of having any actual plot ideas i decided to write some short-ish LaDS drabbles

here's a short thing about xavier being jealous of a (not so) dead man

~2k words, features my named MC since this game gives me a full excuse to unabashedly self-insert

Being jealous of a piece of jewelery is not something Xavier ever would have anticipated in any of the many years he suffered walking the slow path down while searching for her.

So long, so much time stretching out between the last breaths she took in his arms a lifetime and a planet ago and now, when she’s finally within reach again. Here, just as breathtakingly beautiful as he remembers, just as magnetic.

It kills him inside knowing—from several hesitant attempts at sparking recognition—she doesn’t remember a thing.

If she did, maybe there wouldn’t still be so much distance between him and her even after first ‘meeting’ nearly a year ago. Maybe he’d be falling asleep with her in his bed or him in hers instead of a cold floor separating their apartments every night.

Maybe she wouldn’t be wearing that damn necklace.

Nothing but a simple chain featuring a pair of dog tags and a cute apple-shaped charm, the latter of which dimly glitters every time she shifts in her seat and it catches the light streaming in from the UNICORNS office windows. It loops around her neck, settled against the pale, milky expanse of her neck and exposed collarbones—the charm and tags resting, seemingly innocently, just shy of the dip between her breasts.

That she never particularly liked the standard Hunters Association uniform (much like him) and was talented enough for the Captain to let her get away with the style deviation and show more skin had been both a delight and a frustration to him early on.

(he loves drinking in the sight of her. he hates that it allows others to drink in that same sight.)

Now? Now it’s just frustration.

No, not just frustration—it makes his blood boil. Infuriates him because every time he sees those dog tags around her neck it reminds him that in this life another man etched himself onto her heart before he got the chance to.

Reminds him that even though he’s so close to calling her his again, her mind and at least part of her heart remain with a dead man. Not Xavier. Not the one who promised her lifetimes ago that he’d find her and they’d watch the stars fall together again.

Because she doesn’t remember.

He tells himself it’s fine because he’s waited this long already, but his hands itch to feel the softness of her skin again, and he wants to kiss her breathless more often than the handful of times they have the last few months. Her magnetic pull gets harder for him to resist every single day.

He even bought her a gift in the hopes of helping her realize she could let go of a ghost who’d been cruel enough to leave her, that someone who would never hurt her like that was right next to her.

Xavier’s eyes shift from that apple pendant to the bracelet encircling her delicate wrist, a paired set of charms, a moon and sun, dangling and softly clinking together when she moves. She loved the gift, he knows—she’s laughably terrible at keeping her heart off her sleeve—and yet…

…she still won’t stop wearing the necklace.

What does he have to do to pull her away from the dead man whose grave she still visits, still spends an hour speaking to like he’d rise from under the earth to listen as she recounts what’s happened since the last time she came around? What does he have to do to convince her she’s meant to be his?

He barely represses a twitch of the eye at the frustrated thought.

Xavier almost wishes Caleb Xia hadn’t died in that explosion a year ago—he’d be able to make sure the man knew Quinn had promised herself to Xavier to all the stars that night lifetimes before Caleb had even been born. He’d get his point across violently, if need be.

“You can say it.”

He blinks at being addressed; taking a moment to ensure his expression is on the best side of his usual calmness, Xavier scratches his cheek and averts his eyes. “You already know I think it’s a bad idea,” he softly replies.

“It definitely is,” she agrees, her voice laced with exhaustion. Despite this, her hands are steady and sure as she fills out the information needed for a long ‘vacation’ request the Captain promised to approve.

Something viscous and oily slithers around within his chest at the response. He picks at the sleeve of his uniform. “Then don’t go,” he says.

Her hands freeze above the holographic keyboard in front of her. After a beat of silence she says, even quieter than before, “I have to, Xavier. This is the first time something like this has happened since—” she struggles to force the rest of the statement out, then decides to sidestep it entirely rather than speak it aloud, “—I actually have the chance to look for answers before the trail goes cold. I have to.”

Is she trying to convince him or herself?

“No, you don’t,” Xavier insists. “Let the Fleet handle this like they want to. Wait for whatever their investigation turns up. Stay here.” With me. Where you’re safe.

A wash of rage threatens to boil up under his skin when she closes her hand around the dog tags and apple pendant around her neck. The simple gesture speaks volumes—the dead man has a grip on her the same way she grasps the necklace that once belonged to him, one tight enough that she can’t help but choose chasing a ghost instead of the alive and breathing man right at her side.

He swallows it down. The taste is bitter on his tongue.

She resumes filling out her leave request. “I’m going.”

“The Captain told you she disapproved.”

“She also said she wouldn’t stop me.”

“Then let me come with you.”

The request earns him a soft, appreciative smile from her, but she shakes her head and refocuses. With a tap of the enter button on the keyboard, she finalizes and submits the request. “I know what I’m risking doing this,” she says, running a hand through her snow white hair. “It’ll be easier to go unnoticed if it’s just me.”

Is she forgetting how easily he had slipped into their faked identity when investigating the wanderer attacks on the university campus?

If anything, he’s better suited to do what she intends to do—but that would require him giving a damn about someone who posthumously earned Xavier’s loathing, and, at best, all he cares about is the fact that she looks and sounds like she hasn’t slept in the two days since Jenna told her about the explosion in Skyhaven and consequently given her a reason to stay rooted in a past that’s been buried for a year.

The frustration he feels must have finally slipped through the cracks and is visible on his face, because her expression sharpens as she watches him. “You weren’t this adamant about me not looking for answers in the N109 zone. You helped me get there.”

“Skyhaven isn’t the N109 zone,” he says. “In the N109 zone everyone is too focused on their own goals and power struggles to pay much attention to an outsider who knows how to blend in. The Farspace Fleet is organized. They’ll pay attention.”

“I can take care of myself. I know how to keep my head down.”

There are several facts he could use as counter-arguments: she’d been found by the leader of Onychinus almost immediately after finding her way into the N109 zone, she’d been present during an illicit protocore auction that ended explosively, and she landed herself in the crosshairs of the zone’s most violent power struggles by—for some reason—choosing to trust and work with a monster whose hands had been soaked with blood before even arriving on this planet.

He bites his tongue around each of them because they all reveal he’d been keeping a close eye on her the entire time she’d been there.

(it’s not that he doesn’t trust her. he doesn’t trust Sylus.)

(and he sure as hell doesn’t trust the Fleet or its secrets.)

“Let the Fleet handle it,” Xavier tries again, his brow furrowed, and he leans as far into worried desperation as possible to hide his anger. 

He can’t allow himself to be angry with her (even though he is, even if that anger is directed at a dead man through her) because he knows her—the more aggressively he pushes, the more she’ll close herself off and stubbornly dismiss his concern. 

The more she’ll want to go through with it just to prove him wrong.

(she doesn’t need to prove anything to him. he just needs her by his side.)

She stays silent.

He leans forward, scooting his chair closer so he can reach out and brush his fingertips against her cheek. “Please.”

The pleading touch garners no response, either. She doesn’t lean into his palm or acknowledge it at all—she just watches him, and for once he can’t fathom what’s going through her head. Her lips part slightly when his thumb ghosts over them and she lets out a quiet sigh.

For a moment he thinks she’s about to acquiesce.

“I’m leaving for Skyhaven tonight,” she says, instead, gently lifting his hand away from her cheek, turning back to her desk and beginning to gather her things, seemingly oblivious to the fact she’d just driven a dagger of betrayal between his ribs.

You don’t need him, Xavier wants to tell her, he doesn’t deserve this loyalty. He left you. The bastard that necklace represents left her to pick up the pieces of herself all alone. Xavier never has. Never will. He never stopped looking for her, and now that he found her again he never intends to leave her all alone the way Caleb had.

But still she’s choosing a dead man over him.

That black and oily something in his chest churns nauseatingly. Turns venomous. His jaw clenches. 

Withdrawing his hand and averting his gaze from her once again, he scoots back and stands. “Alright,” he says, his voice deceptively soft and soothing considering all he wants to do is drive his blade through something. “Please be careful. And if you need me, just…just say so. I’ll always be here for you.”

An edge slips into the last statement, more than one meaning—most of which will fly over her head so long as she doesn’t remember—hiding within it as he steps away to leave.

“Xavier—”

He taps into his Evol to teleport away before she can say anything more. He doesn’t want to hear it unless it’s her listening to him and not doing this.

His subconscious lack of a specific destination brings him to a peaceful location completely at odds with the viciousness rushing through his veins. A gentle breeze whispers through the branches of trees and carefully maintained greenery surrounding the rows upon rows of stone markers and plaques stretching around in all directions; though the cemetery rests within city limits a bubble of serenity seems to ward away the noise of city life.

To Xavier, the stillness of the air feels oppressive. Smothering.

He looks around to get his bearings, then turns and moves with purpose through the maze of tombstones. He’s only followed her here a time or two—unbeknownst to her—but he knows the way; she always takes her time. Drags her feet like she’s unwilling to face the reminder of what she lost that day. 

In a way, he gets it. He hadn’t wanted to face stone reminder of when he lost her…he isn’t even sure how long ago it was anymore, and the ache still has a home in the cage of his chest. He’s had enough time to let the grief dull, to get used to it, but it never left.

The elation he felt the day he woke up in that protofield, stunned speechless to see her there in front of him had tempered the pain that threatened to well up again when he realized she looked at him and saw a stranger.

Xavier slows to a stop and faces the grave he’d been looking for.

Caleb Xia

2021 - 2048

Forever in flight in my heart.

He feels the ache again today, but it has a different taste in his mouth. Today his grief tastes like rage.

An urge sits somewhere in the back of his mind. That rage making him wonder if all it takes to make her forget the person symbolically buried here is to erase every possible reminder of him. The grave, the necklace, photographs, even her phone—if he destroyed all evidence that ‘Caleb’ existed at all, would she move on?

(it’d only be fair, wouldn’t it? Xavier had been forgotten once already.)

“You’re lucky, you know?” Xavier says, his hand twitching at his side. Seeking his blade. He won’t do it—it would hurt her, and he would never hurt her—but it’s tempting. “I bet you had no idea how lucky you even were before dying. Consider yourself lucky now that you are dead.”

Because if you weren’t, I’d kill you myself.

[alt-wannabe]

MCSR D&D

Reign's sheet is FINALLY done and as per the poll I also included his character mini.

The Genie (Efreeti) Warlock 8 / Oath of Glory Paladin 7

Chat I tried my absolute best for a streamer I don't know as well so hopefully this one makes sense and is up to standards :)

So in the polls it was a pretty damn clear consensus that his highest stat would be charisma. Class wise that left me with bard, sorcerer, and warlock as charisma mains and out of those I felt warlock made the most sense. With Con voted the second highest stat, I figured I could get away with a martial multiclass so paladin ended up being one of the better options. Oath of Glory also ended up having a bunch of class features that make sense in my mind so it worked out. Finally I picked Pact of the Blade for a warlock pact in order to give him a bunch more utility as a martial attacker.

We've got two spell lists since both paladin and warlock get spells. This one was a LOT more based in utility than characterization- both because I'm not exactly confident in my ability to characterize Reign and also because this multiclass is a little funky so I can't just go all in on gimmicks. I tried to give him a pretty large amount of charm spells (ie Command, Charm Person, Enthrall) in order to reflect the super high charisma score in a way outside of just pure ability modifiers. Some other smaller references include invisibility (get it like the potion omg so im so smar- *gunshots*), Dimension Door (my mind is pretending this is like the nether and end portals even though utility wise it's infinitely closer to an ender pearl cause it's a teleport), Locate Object (spawner locating), and Enhance Ability (basically can be used for a variety of effects kinda like potions). The biggest stretch reference is Summon Fey and that pick was ENTIRELY because in this AU silverr is fey adjacent.

Here are the picks for the inventory- congrats Reign on being the first person to get a hella rare artifact yippee. A lot of these are slap in the face references: scale mail from the dragon, the brazier sounds straight out of a nether fortress, flame tongue greatsword is basically just a fire aspect sword, and I've been trying to give all the speedrunners something movement based so I added the gloves. Fun fact when you pick the warlock class you get to pick an arcane focus and one of the options was a rod so that's got double utility as a MC reference and also a spellcasting focus. Like the other sheets I gave him pearls but also note that he has a folding boat cause these speedrunners love their mf boats.

This is just the utility of the orb of dragonkind to give y'all a bit of understanding as to why I picked it.

Okay we've got a lot of features coming up so just like be prepared lmao. The top image is just ripped straight out of Tasha's Cauldron guidebook; I thought I'd let yall read about the subclass and judge if I picked right or not. Divine Sense is akin to finding spawners imo, and I picked interception as the fighting style because of the duos runs Reign does.

These are some more features from his paladin subclass that seemed fitting for specifically duos speedrunning. The big one here (and basically the whole reason I split the multiclass 50/50) is the 7th level feature Aura of Alacrity, which deadass just increases the speed of all allies nearby.

Finally here are the warlock invocations I picked up. Agonizing Blast just adds damage to eldrich blast (warlock cantrip aka an attack that doesnt use spell slots) based on your charisma score so it's an ESSENTIAL pick for a warlock (like genuinely if you make a warlock you need this invocation). Tricksters Escape gives freedom of movement which is essentially just a spell that prevents you from getting stopped by difficult terrain- really fitting for a speedrunner imo. Eldrich smite was just so perfect since he's multiclassed into paladin, giving him access to traditional smites.

And to go along with the character sheet I've also got the mini made!

Features I'm Proud of:

The sword is supposed to look like it's made from the ender dragon's jaw, and it's aflame like his sword from the character sheet

The paws/claws that are featured on his gauntlets (they're technically lion paws not bear but shhhhh)

The wand on the ground I colored like a blaze rod (I was trying my best guys there's no just plain rod)

Looking at his MC skin I have no idea what the thing on his head is so I just made it a circlet.

The teal thing is supposed to be the Orb of Dragonkind but with an eye of ender type of color palette.

The thing on his back is technically a vial pouch but I'm hoping it looks like a strap where he could put his sword when it's not in use- all of the sheaths were too small.