#like a whole fucking lot

[ezrisdax-archive]

Beauty and the Borg – A B7 Shipper’s Manifesto

So. We’ve come here in my life where I just need to talk about ships I love and everyone has to see this. Only not but whatever. I’m gonna try to break this down old school in how I remember shippers manifestos in livejournal days, complete with images. And thus to begin:

What is Star Trek: Voyager?

Unless you live under a rock you’ve probably just heard of Star Trek, maybe not watched it but heard of it. Starting in 1966 the Original Series was released, ran for three years, was canceled due to an infamous error in Neilson ratings and established the franchise. There was an animated series people often forget about, six movies for the Original series, and then in 1987 they brought it back as a live action show called Star Trek: The Next Generation. It did so well and engrained itself in the conscious of many people that they often refer to it as the best Trek but believe me that’s a debate on it’s own. And thus had it’s own spin off, Deep Space Nine in 1993. While not as popular as TNG it’s grouped into what people call the 90s Trek. With the last one being the last spin off in 1995: Star Trek: Voyager.

Where DS9 introduced the first black captain (though it took three years for him to get that promotion, boo), VOY introduced the first female captain lead of a Star Trek series. The premise of the show was that on a hunt for some resistance fighters both ships are pulled through the Alpha Quadrant to the Delta Quadrant. Approximately seventy-thousand light years from home. Due to the choice made by the captain, Kathryn Janeway, they are then stranded there and the crews of the ships band together on Voyager to make their way back to the Alpha Quadrant and get home.

That’s an extreme simplification but basically Lost in Space for Star Trek.

And that leads us to the characters of this essay:

B’Elanna Torres - The Engineer Who Built This Society

A half-human, half-klingon Maquis born to John Torres (human) and Miral (Klingon). She and her mother were the only Klingons on the colony where they lived and as such B’Elanna was teased and made fun of at school. Her father eventually couldn’t take being married to a Klingon and left her and her mother, an incident which left B’Elanna worrying was her fault being half Klingon.. She was then raised on the Klingon homeworld until she left to join Starfleet Academy…

And quit it.

Basically she couldn’t find herself fitting in yet again and left to once again find her place which brought her to the Maquis.

The Maquis were a group of resistance fighters, depending who you ask of course, that fought for the freedom of species, mostly Bajor, from Cardassian rule. They were considered to be a threat by the Federation and hunted down by both Cardassians and the Federation. B’Elanna was only in the group roughly for a year before the incident that stranded them in the Delta Quadrant occurred. She did think of that group as her family though and felt both indebted to them and loved them.

While on Voyager she became Chief Engineer and was damn fucking good at it but let’s get into the heart of her character here. B’Elanna suffers from depression over the course of the series and self doubt when it comes to herself while not at the job. She pushes people away while simultaneously hoping they’ll stay anyway.

She pushes herself to her limits, trying to see if she’s enough and never really finding that answer. She also struggles with a connection to both her parents and her cultures; coming more to terms with the Klingon culture as time goes on and also striking up conversation with her father again. She’s also a big romantic who reads romance novels.

Tragically that kicks off her romance with Tom Paris and they eventually get married and have a kid together and even then B’Elanna worries for her child who will still look Klingon. She doesn’t want her kid to have to go through what she did and suffer for it. In the end she chooses to accept her child will look like her as a Klingon but it’s clear the thought will linger on for her regardless.

She’s blunt and sarcastic and brash, takes no shit, and loves her friends very very deeply.

 Seven of Nine - What I Want is to be Useful

Seven of Nine didn’t come in until season 4 of Voyager. Basically here because of sexism and the writers wanting that sweet sweet sex appeal. She was a human, once called Annika Hansen born to Magnus and Erin Hansen. Her parents were scientists who were studying the Borg and took their daughter along with them for…reasons. Look it wasn’t very smart. 

Lo and behold the Borg caught on to the fact they were being watched and assimilated Seven and her family. At the time she was only six and thus spent most of her life in a borg cube, as such she has a…unique take on cultures.

She ended up on Voyager because Voyager made a deal with the Borg to get through their area of space. Then Janeway cut her connection to the Borg and Seven was left floundering and suddenly alone. The Borg are a hive mind type species and she’d had that for over twenty years of her life. The shock left her reeling though she’d hardly admit it.

Seven is a complicated character in a lot of aspects, the series generally tries to explore her gaining her independence and learning about herself and where she fits in. It’s not perfect and often clumsily written, especially when it comes to the Doctor teaching her. They do push a lot of gender ideas as well which haven’t aged well. And leave her in those terrible catsuits. She also, due to her stubbornness, butts heads with a lot of the characters as she’s trying to figure this out.

(Seven also shows up later in the Picard series but I am only talking about her as she pertains to Voyager in this essay.) 

Unlike B’Elanna she’s not really a romantic though the show does give her romance options including setting her up with Chakotay right at the end for…also reasons. And where B’Elanna only takes the mother position towards the end of the show Seven actually has a character who is like her son, another ex-Borg named Icheb introduced in season 6. As well as looking after Naomi Wildman (first baby on Voyager, we all love her) who she admits is family.

For all the imperfect writing they have about her I’ll give them that.

Seven is logical and cold, sure in her abilities and has a drive for perfection.

A Collective of Two - B7

To say these two don’t get along at first is an understatement. B’Elanna is mistrusting of Seven and Seven looks down on B’Elanna. They both see each other as stubborn and rude and want the other out of the way while they work (See Scientific Measure in which they argue in a Jefferies Tube and Message in a Bottle where B’Elanna does a full call out on Seven). At one point (Day of Honor) B’Elanna even asks Seven if she regrets everything she did as Borg, assimilating other cultures, and Seven says no. Granted if she asked that again to season seven Seven (har har) the answer would be far more complicated. 

Seven comes to value her independence and individuality across the series. She comes to see the Voyager crew as her collective. In one episode (called One, I’m on a roll here, let me have this.) Seven is left alone while the rest of the crew is in stasis. The EMH is around but even he gets disrupted and Seven is by herself on the ship with only her hallucinations and herself to talk to. It’s the end of the episode that stands out here.

In the beginning of the episode she approaches B’Elanna and Harry and well, annoys them. She doesn’t see an issue with this and is not here for friendship. The end of the episode she approaches them again, and I guess Tom is there too, whatever, and asks to sit with them. When they say yes she sits down next to B’Elanna and admits she felt the need for companionship. It’s a huge step with Seven seeking others out. 

On the other side is B’Elanna the episode right before that, Demon. She isn’t allowed to go down to a planet to look for her friends because Chakotay is worried she isn’t a ‘cool head’ that’s needed for this assignment. After a bit of a fight it’s then that B’Elanna requests Seven go then in her place, after all “Nobody’s head is cooler than hers”. An insult and a compliment in one, B’Elanna and Seven’s relationship in a nutshell. But the point here is that B’Elanna has come to trust Seven. Towards the end of season four there’s a measure of respect between them and acknowledgement of each other’s skills.

(Also see Message in a Bottle, when B’Elanna first approves of a plan Seven sets forth. And waits till no one is in the room to see her do it.)

Which brings us to the end of season four. Voyager has potentially found a way home (spoiler alert: there’s three more seasons. They have not.) and at one point B’Elanna and Seven are working together on the other ship which prompts a conversation about Earth. Seven during the conversation points out that B’Elanna seems eager to return, which B’Elanna denies. Then as Seven says it “You were a member of the Maquis. Starfleet Command will no doubt hold you responsible for a multitude of crimes. You will find nothing on Earth but adversity.” And we get the following scene:

Of course then B’Elanna plays it off as a joke later but the line still stands out to me. It truly does show how the two of them view themselves. B’Elanna isn’t accepted because she’s half-Klingon or because she’s a Maquis. Seven isn’t accepted because she’s ex-Borg or, in the words of B’Elanna, she’s rude. While they’ve carved out an area of acceptance on Voyager that doesn’t mean it extends beyond that. 

Earth is an unknown for the both of them at this time. They’re more alike and are starting to see that even if they won’t admit it. Yet.

Of course, they’re also still not about to admit it in season five.

Season five has a…bad episode in it called Infinite Regress that regrettably I have to talk about. In it Seven is taking on other personalities from people who she assimilated over the years. At one point she takes on a male Klingon and, well. Tries to mate with B’Elanna which includes biting her on her cheek. The only saving factor of that episode is that it starts the Seven and Naomi friendship and also this line:

That’s it.

Honestly season five isn’t the best for B7 stuff, there’s a few scenes like in Extreme Risk when B’Elanna is going through some major depression and Seven comes to her to discuss a project or even in the Course: Oblivion episode though sadly that’s not actually them but clone selves. And I say that with an absolute straight face even as a snicker about it. Turns out you can forget you’re a clone but can’t forget you’ve got chemistry with each other.

Sure girl. Tell her that after she just got married, just say you wanna open her relationship to include you already. 

There is however one fun and stand out scene towards the end of season five, see it turns out Seven has been stalking B’Elanna (and Tom) to study mating rituals. Honestly, worst choice there, Seven. Needless to say, B’Elanna notices and doesn’t take this “study” well.

It’s nice to see not all the antagonism is gone. But they still have time to reach an understanding! Sorta. Also that episode is Someone to Watch Over Me. Don’t watch it, that’s the only good scene.

I gotta add one scene however from Relativity even if B’Elanna isn’t in the scene herself. Tom approaches Seven to team up for a ping pong match and of course Seven isn’t interested. Until B’Elanna is brought up.

Like Seven. Babe just say you wanna impress B’Elanna.

And thus we go to season six.

Okay I’ll be honest, this season doesn’t have a lot for them either. Season four and seven are standouts in their interactions imo. And since this is my essay it’s all my opinion. I blame the het ships they were both forced in. 

But in Survival Instinct they do get a nice scene together. In the episode Seven is suffering having come into contact with her old unimatrix and remembering something she did. She can’t fully piece it all together and it’s shaken her up. At one point B’Elanna tries to comfort her while they’re going over data and Seven snaps back that she has no feelings about the past. And then clearly regrets it, something season four Seven absolutely wouldn’t care about.

It’s a show of how far they’ve both come. B’Elanna offering comfort to Seven and Seven acknowledging that her words hurt B’Elanna. It’s a small subtle scene that makes me really happy.

There’s a few other scenes here and there too, in The Voyager Conspiracy Seven once comms B’Elanna right as she wakes up and I just find that funny. Like sure, don’t wait till you’re on shift. A moment in Tsunkatse where B’Elanna jokes about Borgs and fun to Seven. And then in Fury when Kes gets to engineering there’s a blink and you’ll miss it scene where B’Elanna reaches back to pass Seven a phaser and they’re both just very in sync in the scene. And then B’Elanna dies and Seven sees it :( at least it’s all undone in the end. She’s fine. Death in Star Trek: Voyager is a punch card honestly; punch it ten times and get a free replacement from another reality. (Sorry Harry)

That ties up that season in a tragically low point for them but that’s okay because it’s season seven.

Season seven was the last one Voyager had. B’Elanna marries Tom and gets pregnant, Seven gets into a bit of a rushed relationship with Chakotay right at the end. Voyager finally gets home but these two are gay between them and the joke’s on the Voyager writers. Unlike them I can pretend Tom/B’Elanna never happened at all.

Right at the start is the episode Imperfection where a Borg implant Seven has is failing and she must face the fact she might die. In response she chooses to work, as she says “What I want is to be useful.” And for that she chooses not to go to her usual post in Astrometrics but to hide out in Engineering. So I could infer that Engineering, and thus B’Elanna who is in charge of it, is a safe space for her. That’s made even more clear when B’Elanna finds her and they have a talk about life and legacy.

It’s an incredibly soft and meaningful scene, where B’Elanna expresses that Seven has made an impact on everyone (herself quietly included). It’s interrupted by the Doctor finding them but that leads to B’Elanna coming to Seven’s defense and saying she can stay in Engineering. B’Elanna will keep an eye on her.

Unlike at the end of season four where B’Elanna lumps them together as outcasts and then jokes about it, this time she is completely serious. She has Seven’s back, they are “[the] difficult patients” who are in this together after all. Sadly that’s the last they interact this episode however brief it was it really goes to show how they’ve come together as a unit and a friendship. 

There’s a few more scattered moments in season seven episodes, in Drive Seven is the one who convinces B’Elanna to accept Tom’s hobbies. Like she needs to. Look I’m not bitter (lies). In Lineage when B’Elanna finds out she’s pregnant and stumbles Seven is the one to reach out to steady her and deliver that news to her. It’s almost funny that Icheb is also there and once had a crush on B’Elanna, like wrong ex-Borg Voyager writers.

This does lead us to Human Error though, which has quite a few more moments with them but also sadly the last time they really interact. 

In the episode Seven has been taking advantage of the holodeck to imagine different moments, including herself without Borg implants. One of the moments is B’Elanna’s baby shower though they don’t interact there. Instead Seven misses the real baby shower and awkwardly arrives at engineering with a belated gift for B’Elanna.

It’s cute, Seven’s really trying to connect here. And then keeps trying to connect.

Girl…I don’t have time (okay I do) to explain how gay this is. Seven could have chosen anyone on the ship and choses to try to connect with B’Elanna here. Including noting her appearance and asking about it. Of course the funniest thing is B’Elanna’s side eye after the fact.

Of course the scene is meant to be humorous, look how Seven once again struggles to connect to people but I chose to take it at face value here. Every other time it’s been B’Elanna reaching out to connect with Seven and this time it’s Seven reaching out to connect with her. They’re both trying in their own weird way. 

The episode ends without further interaction but there is one moment at the end:

Like the Tom moment above I just think it’s funny that people are out here like ‘no Seven you should come. B’Elanna is there :)’ 

And that’s it. That’s the B7 in canon moments broken down. So let’s talk more about them because I can’t shut up.

Okay so like…why? 

For the past oh…seven years I’ve been talking about B7 on my blog probably too much. I just think they’re neat! But now comes the time to explain that and I’m not the best at words but I’ll try.

For me it’s about the mirror they are to each other. Both are characters struggling with identity and where they fit in in a world that doesn’t want to fit them in. They’re extremely capable and smart but flawed. Whether the show writers realized it or not they made these two characters so similar and set up exploration of that and then just…never delivered.

I want the exploration there, I want to dive into what it means to see someone as a reflection of yourself but then acknowledge the good parts they have like when B’Elanna encourages Seven about her legacy and what an impact she has. Does she know that she has that same legacy? Does she even know she has those same doubts?

For two characters who are vastly different in personality there’s just so much they share and can share. They’re both disillusioned with Starfleet and people and yet trying. They’re put into boxes by society and just can’t fit. They’re done bad by the writers in pretty fucking horrible effect. 

There’s a trilogy of books called Voyager String Theory, really only the first two are important in the context of B7 though. In the first book they crash land on a planet and at one point Seven has to give B’Elanna some borg nanoprobes to help her heal.

“We would be the collective- a collective of two.” Seven tells her. That alone struck me as how the two of them could be. Outcasts together. Difficult Patients. A Collective of Two. 

(Also that book has a lot more gay points in it, please read it:

Like, c’mon.)

It shows the potential of them and while Picard really killed, hm, a lot of things, I always wanted to imagine a future where they got back to Earth and were that Collective. Dealing with this new area together. Oh sure they’d get on each other’s nerves, part of the fun for me is that I don’t think they’d ever really lose that antagonism, but after everything they’ve been through you can see how they’ve come to respect and count on each other. 

TL;DR…90s trek writers accidentally made it gay again.

Supplemental

I’ll be honest, I have a tendency not to read fics of pairing I myself write because I’m terrified I might subconsciously take something from another writer without even realizing it in that same area of fanfic. So instead I’ll rely on two others fic rec lists:

https://trillscienceofficer.tumblr.com/post/706359122066636800/trillscienceofficers-belannaseven-fic-rec-list

https://punkbxt.tumblr.com/post/622585834575626240/b7-fics-that-i-read-over-and-over-again-without

I am in fact on there twice (favourites and you’ve got my number are mine) sooo feel free to ignore those if you’ve had enough of my writing at this point.

For other things I’d suggest punkbxt on tumblr for their amazing b7 art and comics. Again please read Voyager: String Theory at least the first book. It is gay. 

There are also far far better people at putting things into words then me on good old hellsite dot com so honestly just go through the b7 tag. I wouldn’t recommend the character tags themselves though. Trust me.

If you made it this far then thank you for reading and I hope I could nudge you a little bit in the B7 direction (and thanks to @trillscienceofficer​ for all the help on this). Live fast and prosper~

[ink-the-artist]

Love the contrast between the Americans’ “Apollo” and the Soviets’ “Sputnik.” You got the Americans naming their rocket after a Greek god trying to communicate the grandness and importance of this rocket. And you got the Soviets naming their rocket “fellow traveler.” Like a friend you go on an  adventure with together. This rocket is our little friend lol 

[st-hedge]

To the temple in the woods

[keferon]

Did you think I was done? Ahahahaha no, I have more.

Because chapter 70 of MOMU gave me the very dynamic between them that I missed so much, I just blacked out and started drawing uncontrollably lmao

Also. ALSO. I noticed a while ago that Prowl has the habit of..like…constantly frowning. So. I did a bit of research and made this graph.

In 70 chapters, Prowl frowns rougly 104 times. And the intensity of this gesture is very clearly correlated with the development of his relationship with Jazz, as you can see ahahahahah It might be wrong tho don’t take me seriously I’m not good with graphs

[yanderespamton78]

Edit since a lot of people seem confused - your "real" name is the name that you want to be referred to in real life. It doesn't have to be your legal name. So if you're trans and you have a different name to whats on your birth certificate, even if not many people call you by the name, it still counts as your real name.

Edit 2 : Holy shit guys please stop reblogging this post my poor inbox im getting like 20 notifs an hour asjfhkajshdkh /lh /srs

[lesamis]

If you're up for it could you explain what is making the Germany government stuff so funny? I can find news articles about it (a coalition is dissolving? There's been tension for a while?) but they're all fairly serious. Thx!

ohhh, sure thing! i'll do my best!

i'll say upfront: this is a pretty serious thing to happen. our chancellor fired our minister of finance, Lindner, which definitively breaks up the governing coalition. germany will likely have snap elections at a moment in which far-right parties are polling extremely well. if news coverage about it seems like people are Worried, that's because, well, they are.

however. the reason it's funny is because our minister of finance was fired. ministers aren't really... ever fired. like, it's not a done thing. i'll fully admit i didn't even know it was an option until yesterday. and our minister of finance wasn't just anyone, he was one of the most mocked and hated figures in politics to germans who vote anywhere left of center.

the coalition that governed until yesterday was made up of the green party, the social democrats, and the neoliberal party (FDP). the FDP is infamous (and i mean, my parents already raised me to hate them for that) for playing kingmaker in coalition governments: they never get all that many votes, but they get just enough that whoever they agree to form a government with will probably succeed. they then tend to force extreme concessions from their coalition partners, because hey, if we walk off, you can't govern at all! so you better play along!

for the past three years, this behaviour has been extremely frustrating for germans who voted for greens or social democrats, because policy from their faction was constantly being blocked by the FDP and often by Lindner personally. the FDP received 11,5% of votes in 2021, but to many of us, it felt as if they were the only party who really had any say in the governing coalition. it made the green and social democratic coalition partners look spineless and passive.

and now, i invite you to imagine how on the day of the US election results, the day the whole world rolled their eyes at the sheer fucking stupidity and pointlessness of it all, at NINE IN THE EVENING, just as germans are getting ready to settle in to bed to dream of nightmare global politics -

the news suddenly breaks that our notoriously invisible chancellor just decided to fire Lindner for that exact behaviour. this chancellor comes out and says, on camera, to the entire sleepy nation, that acting the way Lindner did - blocking necessary policies, refusing to approve budgets unless his party's interests were met - was childish, selfish, irresponsible, and unfit for government, so, whoops, he had to go. shame. coalition over, i guess.

so, politically, that was a long-needed but never-expected moment of triumph for those of us who think the FDP is a clown show made up of human TESLA shares, and it came at a hysterically funny moment.

on a personal level, i can barely explain how uniquely hateable Lindner has always been. he's what would happen if a stock index graph came to life. he hates poor people with a relish; he mocks welfare recipients and would ax minimum wages in a second. he's everyone's business major roommate who shows up in boat shoes fresh off a yacht to discuss NFTs with you. throughout the entire time that he's used his rich boy policy blackmail strategy, he's been smug about it, and he was never taken to task for it, and millions of germans have been longing to throw rotten fruit in his face since 2017. and now we finally get to do it. via memes. on the day of trump's election win.

so that's why it's funny.

[lucabyte]

i feel like people are sleeping on the occam's razor situation of how buckwild it is to outright accuse a guy of being a clone of your friend even if you DO have a lot of circumstantial evidence. there's other options is what im saying. they could just be like. a guy. that's a sensible deduction. you should explore that deduction. ignore my shirt that reads I <3 RED HERRINGS.

i still think odile has the correct theory on lock but she's smart enough to know it needs like... a real smoking gun to be able to bring it up without sounding insane.

anyway. (mirabelle voice) i know its rude to speculate but has anyone else noticed the grieving? they seem to be grieving. does anyone have any thoughts on the grieving? i have some thoughts on the grieving.

[vivitur-moritur]

Fanart for @artsarasp's amazing System Possession AU!!! I told myself that I was just going to make a quick little sketch then I animated it??? Wild. Anyway, I really love artsarasp's au, it's fascinating and it Compels Me!!!

[bixels]

Taking the current topic as an excuse to ask you to tell me all the reasons you love Rarijack. Your art for the ship is so sweet and intimate I'd love to hear any in depth thoughts you have.

Breathes in.

I think what makes their dynamic really strong is that they have opposing personalities but aligned values. It's deeper than just "opposites attract." Rarity's fancy, prissy, and femme while Applejack's modest, rough, and "masculine." But both value hard work (to the point of being workaholics), their families (both have guardianship over their little sisters), running successful businesses, and eventually each other. Their relationship can be boiled down to, "Despite our differences/disagreements, I still like you because we value the same things."

We see their relationship develop so much. In the first season, they can't stop bickering about surface-level differences. By season four, they still bicker, but will mend their relationship because they can't help but do nice things for each other. In Trade Ya, they start off arguing over personality differences (Applejack likes old junk and Rarity likes useless crap). Then they pivot and start arguing that they value their relationship more than the other. In the end, they mend things by sacrificing their needs and buying each other a gift. Even if they don't understand it, they know it'd make the other happy. And that's all that really matters. It's a genuinely sweet moment that shows how arguing can be healthy and necessary for relationships to strengthen.

We even see them dropping their hang-ups about each others' personalities. In Made in Manehattan, when Rarity runs off in dramatics about someone's fashion, AJ doesn't roll her eyes or scoff, she smiles. Oftentimes, their conflicts are very common domestic conflicts romantic couples face. Applejack's Day Off is about a woman's inability to balance work and life and find time to properly spend with her partner, causing her partner to feel neglected.

By season seven, they're actively participating in each others' interests. Any problems or conflicts that arise are dealt with, and they come out the other end stronger and closer. In Honest Apple, AJ pretty much spells out why their relationship works so well: even though she doesn't understand fashion, she can recognize and appreciate how much work it takes and wants to respect that. When she realizes her mistake in the episode, AJ goes above and beyond to fix things and apologize to Rarity. They care about each other so much.

The two go out of their way, sacrificing their personal desires and beliefs and doing things they normally wouldn't, to make the other happy. That's just love.

There's Simple Ways, where AJ gets stuck in an unwanted love triangle between Rarity and her hipster crush. And her frustration and anger can be so easily interpreted as AJ finding herself in a terrible position; the girl she loves wants another man, and that man wants her.

I dunno. I've always had a preference for opposites attract ships, but Rarijack's stuck with me like a brain worm because they have the perfect chemistry. The way they show they care, or do things for each other, I've always read it as the truest representation of romance in the show.

[autisticrosewilson]

You're all fucking wrong about Catholic Jason he wouldn't feel guilt about Jack shit, ESPECIALLY not killing. He would get the All-Blades and be convinced that this is God's go ahead and divine confirmation that he's right about everything and all of his opinions are valid and everyone who opposes his worldview is a moron blinded by idealism and naivete.

[anime-academia]

I am going to fight everyone who has turned Sherlock Holmes into this edgy, rude, arse of a character. This man is kind, caring, sympathetic, and knows how to interact with people (even if he'd prefer to avoid doing so).

I get the whole genuis-who- can't -relate- to -the -way- normal -people- function, but y'know what, he's not condescending about it. He doesnt necessarily think himeself to be above the masses. He admits to being beaten without throwing a tantrum about it.

Being a genuis doesn't mean or necessitate being cold and unfeeling

[raiiny-bay]

Love, Dhes

Parker,

It's unfair how time with you feels so short. How the last 10 years have felt like no time at all. I like to think there are other versions of us out there, somewhere. Maybe in another timeline, another universe. I like to think we find each other no matter where we are or what we're doing. That we're together and happy and I get to love you in a dozen different lifetimes. That's what I hope, anyway. And I hope when this lifetime ends, we get to start over and do it all again. Because once just isn't enough. Not for me. Not with you.

I hope the next 10 years pass slower.

Love, Dhes

[princema-k]

so draw your blade, you wretched fiend and let's you and i fight like the dishonourable dogs we are savage, violent, yet free and when the curtain calls, let me put you out of my misery

[gunstellations]

In the world I love

_

In a different world

[journal-from-the-heart]

i think, for trauma survivors, especially those who were emotionally abused, invalidated, or gaslit, it is really important not to underestimate the significance of speaking bluntly about what happened to you. Forcing yourself not to beat around the bush, not to downplay what you went through with your words. say what happened, without any caveats, without any “but it could’ve been worse”, “but i might just be being overdramatic”, “but it wasn’t really THAT bad,” and so forth. sit with the discomfort until you can begin to let yourself realize that it WAS that bad, you WERENT being overdramatic, and even if it could’ve been worse you still didn’t deserve it. It’s almost like a form of reclamation, taking back your memories, taking back your life, even the difficult or gross parts, and refusing to let anyone change the narrative or tell you how you should feel anymore, even yourself. and it hurts and it’s scary and it feels weird and awkward and sometimes you want to convince yourself you’re lying, but i think sitting in those weird feelings and letting yourself admit that you really did go through trauma puts the power back in your hands to process things and be compassionate to yourself while you heal

[monkayy]