#life's been brutal
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Sorry I haven't posted any new fics in a while. I had a lot of work and assignments that I needed to finish. In short, life's been busy. Also the fact I've been just done with everything after the cancellation of "Shadow and Bone" as well as the firing of Melissa Barrera from Scream 7. I'll try to post sth before the end of the month.
#life#shadow & bone#shadow and bone#scream#i swear to gawd#life's been brutal#idk#i'll try to be more active#and post#bye
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Sab stops running.
mine, he/him
#thygatrion#illustration#butch#trans#not sapphic just brutal dykes#sab#cyborg#sci fi#trans art#trans artist#idk if i'll get back to this story now that my life's been taken over by a different one#and besides that#read superpose#he/him#i'm also he/him thank you!#trans man#not transmasc just trans man
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[ID: a digital drawing of riz gukgak from fantasy high. in the front is a relatively small drawing of riz juggling books that are falling out of his hand and a phonecall, and he has a huge backpack on. he looks a bit overwhelmed, hair flying in all directions, and has a nervous smile on. in the background is a large shadow of riz, only one glowing eye and a shining gun visible. the background is red, giving an eerie feel. End ID]
Kill your best friend
Cheat your way to your rogue teacher
Announce your presidential campaign
Don't let them know how angry you are
LEARN TO RECOGNIZE A MONSTER
#riz gukgak#fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high junior year spoilers#ik the 'uh oh i fucking miscalculated big time' applies to all the bad kids BUT riz is my little blorbo so#and he was the first to go full brutal in s1 and was likely the one ppl would've seen it coming from the least#i dont need to justify myself i love all their dichotomies. my homicidal blorbos who're on a slippery slide to becoming the villains#as they grow more powerful but still react to threat with a 'no holds barred' approach#wait wait this isn't an analysis post jskdjsdjk art! had a lot of fun with this one#have the funniest 'sketch' for this that i did that was me drawing w my laptop touch pad (? the touchy mouse thing) w notes so i dont forge#the idea back when i didnt have the juices to draw it and was also in the armchair writing fic and didnt want to move stations#im still experiment with colours and now im also figuring out gradients which is super fun! correction layers my beloved <3#also didn't use my usual canvas size and had to keep making it bigger and bigger so its unfortunately compressed#such is life#did some warmup before this for once bcs i felt like working on my no-underdrawing drawing skills#have this beautiful pen brush and a new big (for me) sketchbook so i went to town with some references open#also working on tackling the wretched face angles. why do our faces Do That#anywayyyy the list is from kipperlilly's pov in case it wasn't clear#im looking forward to eventually rewatching s3 and giving her another chance#like i COULD get sick abt her. theres potential there bcs i do love angry annoying women who stick to their shit#im leaving now i simply have to hydrate its been hours#eyestrain tw#sorry for the late tw i work with so many layers of eye protection on my laptop that it took looking at this on my phone to go uh oh
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LOWER DECKS LOWER DECKS LOWER DECKS!
#lower decks#star trek lower decks#beckett mariner#mariner#art block is a bitch#but lower decks saved my life#no joke#also college has been brutal#0/10 would not recommend
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the buddy-buddy act ends now
#ritsu: i am a horrible person and i hate you this is my evil arc#shigeo: *hugs his hurting little brother*#ritsu: *breaks into tears* not fair#GDHEHXGSGDH god God i love ritsu okay#i love the kageyama brothers they mean everything#and ritsu- loving ritsu has just been SO interesting and enlightening even these past months#I'm squatting in his brain#his tendency to catastrophize#his powerful sense of self-importance that coexists with brutal self criticism#his prickly aloof nature and enormous capacity for empathy that he consciously extends to very few#he's a judgy b-tch but only in his head#people adore him but he's not interested#he's Driven by fear and he's brave to the point of lunacy#the LEVELS of gaslighting he did on himself to convert that fear into adoration#protectiveness#anything#Anything else that makes sense#the way he snapped under the weight So Fast when presented with an out eager to test what kind of wicked creature he is under the layers of#paint and consolation prizes#his high morals that he's itching to see crumbled#his 'I've obtained loss' that speaks to me. his 'I just wanted to see what its like being a fool'#his 'i realised what i really wanted: to learn that devotion towards living a fun life and shedding sweat and tears and blood for it.'#g a h#kageyama ritsu#ritsu kageyama#mp100#mob psycho 100#mob psycho 100 fanart#kageyama brothers#this piece fought me every step of the way Jeeesussss but i love it. it was very experimental in the direction i want to keep exploring
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I'm all for viktor manhandling jayce, but let's be real. Jayce is LUCKY viktor chose that path
Had viktor approached jayce in human form, hugged/cradled him, held his face, and soothed him with sweet nothings, that man would have FOLDED like a lawn chair
After months of torture? HIM??? He would not survive
#we already know jayce likes using peoples laps as a head rest LMFAO he would be BROKEN#also i havent finished season 2 yet this is all what i got from spoilers. thanks guys <- guy who ruined his own life#im a good ending for everyone truther but also. a scene like this but with the same ending?? could have been BRUTAL#i want that man BROKEN i want that man GIVING UP for a moment#i want that man almost falling for it because he just went through months of hell and he just wants a hug and a break dammit#screaming crying throwing up etc#having a breakdown while hextor is smiling thinkin about how he won and hes gonna get his partner on his beep boop shit#arcane#jayvik#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#jayce talis#viktor arcane#viktor cult#when youve had such a shit day you can ignore your ex being a cult leader who wants to assimilate you#edging whump w this one boys#yappersville
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I can’t even remember the last time I did fanart for something I wasn’t hyperfixated on but this image just came into my head and wouldn’t leave so I had to draw it
also lovingly dedicated to @soliusss
#I’m sure it’s been done but like. it’s so funny to me#anyways these guys were also soley responsible for getting me through the longest most brutal homework session of my life. so.#i feel like they deserved a little doodle at this point#malevolent#malevolent podcast#art#my art#tw blood
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I write fragile on a dozen boxes salvaged from recycling I forgot to take out before I knew I was moving and my hand shakes even more each time. The lines bleed off the box corners and into me. I'm fragile, you see.
#poem#poetry#spilled ink#spilled thoughts#long story short i have made choices in my life such that my only option when i hit this present juncture#was to move home and i am not handling the lack of choice well#in my first year living here especially i bought beautiful fragile things because i love beautiful fragile things and because i thought#i was on the path that my next move would be my last one. i was going to buy a home and that would be it and i'd only need to pack up#my whole life once more and so i could justify the vintage vases and such. but the past couple of years have been brutal on me#and i've made choices that i stand by and choices that i don't and now i'm moving home and it's less than ideal but i'll make it work#perhaps this is short story long#anyway. before i first moved in my roommate texted me from home depot because she and her boyfriend were at home depot#and i was at work at the time. and she wanted to know what color i wanted my room because they were gonna paint my room that day#and i didn't have time to make a decision and she's an artist with a great eye so i sent her my pinterest decor board and said maybe a gree#like this kind of green? and she got this gorgeous green reminiscent of a paris green that looks amazing with all my art on the walls#but i just had to take the art down. i'm in the middle of the task actually. and now it's just this big green expanse#and i'm not feeling so good about leaving this place#but the way i felt so safe and so loved when i got that text and when i got here and saw that the room was painted bc they wanted me to sta#the past few years have been not so good in a lot of ways like i said but this place was an island of peace for me when things were rough#anyway. fragile. thanks for listening
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you used to be such a baby.
#marking this for . Violence.#Uh. Ask to tag.#Been hesitant to post this and i might delete it if i get embarrassed . Whatever.#If it isn't obvious. Gordon's not really there .#I will do more rambling. Past the tags#Blood#cw blood#tw blood#violence#gore#that man has been. Brutalized. Eeeyikes !#Barney Calhoun#half life#gordon freeman#Barney's supposed 2 be a little younger here . Maybe in his 30s#something something seeing the specter of your long gone companion from a time you can never go back to judging your every move#because youre doing this because of him. Youre doing this for him.#Youre doing this for everyone. and he looks exactly the same as you get older#and your clothes become drenched with blood rhat isnt your own and why have you survived this long when others havent.#(You know why)#and then he does come back. for real. Not a ghost#not a figment of your imagination.#And he looks exactly the same#Or something. Lol#LISTEN . sometimes you get caught by a CP and they're gonna blow your cover and get everyone you love killed.#What're you gonna do.#I don't think Barney is a violent man. Far from it . I just think bad things happened. And I think he had to do bad things#WAVES MY HANDS. I ALSO JUST KIND OF WANTED TO DRAW BLOOD . and Barney is my Guy of the moment .#I think about him alot . I should talk about it more. Whaterver
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I know we're ignoring canon right now, but can. Can we just talk about Dabi's ending for a second? Because like. What the fuck? This guy's been suffering his entire life. From being abused by his father, to being kidnapped and experimented on while he's in a coma, just to escape and go home to find out his worst fears have come true, his family abandoned him, they never really cared. Then, he spends the next 8 years homeless, where he damages his body so much to the point he's being held together by staples? How painful was his daily life?? No wonder he wanted to die. His life was hell. And now, he spends his last days alive trapped in a fucking fish tank, in excruciating agony (you cannot tell me he isn't in any pain. He has no fucking skin left, along with his other injuries. Not to mention the emotional and psychological trauma once again inflicted on him). He doesn't get to choose whether or not he wants to keep living through this nightmare. He doesn't get to choose whether or not he wants Endeavor to visit him every day. No one asks him his opinion on any of this. They decide for him, and he doesn't have the strength left to protest. He can't move, can't talk, can't do anything. All he can do is sit there, watching on helplessly, with the knowledge that after his death, his family will once again leave him behind and forget all about him. He'll never see the League again, the only people in the world who actually loved him unconditionally and never saw him as a problem or a mistake. He has to die with the knowledge that he failed. His family won't ever truly see him as a person, and he never, not once in his life, got to be happy.
#is this stupid and incoherent? probably. im just so pissed.#the brutality of dabi's narrative is horrifying and uncomfortable#he never had a chance and the narrative blames him for it#even at the end he gets no relief. Only a horrific painful death.#oh well. maybe if he was born with a better quirk his life wouldn't have been an absolute nightmare from the moment he opened his eyes :(#sucks to be him right? anyway lets go look at the heroes smiling again :D#so disgusting that the disabled and mentally ill character ends up like this#while his abuser continues to be celebrated and supported by literally everyone#as a fellow disabled and mentally ill person: bbygrl you deserved so much better#bnha#mha#my hero academia#bnha spoilers#bnha manga spoilers#league of villains#todoroki touya#bnha dabi#bnha critical#bnha rant#anti endeavor
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i think a lot about how the roman thermae and bathing culture is presented as a sign of how Civilized and Advanced the romans were but one of the essential parts of the thermae was the caldarium, essentially a sauna, which was heated up through the floor.... under which slaves constantly had to toil to feed the fire while suffocating in the heat and steam that would rise through the floor to make free romans and the slaves' masters get a nice sweat, free to move on to the cold baths in the next room whenever they wanted.
#'roman citizenship was given to every free man in the empire' sure! but not only was that very late#but a very considerable portion of the population of the empire at any given point was a slave. most slaves lived horrific lives.#i mean i want to be clear rome wasn't like EXCEPTIONALLY brutal or bad to slaves compared to its neighbours#by which i mean that it was just as callous as most ancient mediterranean civilizations when it came to the treatment of slaves#and the scale of roman's brutality towards slaves matches the scale of its size and timeframe.#athenians were a much smaller population of the ancient world but slaves in the silver mines of laureion had a life expectancy of five year#that's still thousands upon thousands of people who suffered horrific deaths and lived the rest of their lives in miserable conditions#all to make the city rich#anyhow i don't think rome is like a particularly evil empire in the sense that all empires are evil#people love to imagine themselves ancient roman aristocrats but you would not have been one. you would be lucky to be a /domestic/ slave.#who still had shit lives tbc but exponentially better than working on the latifundiae#eli talks
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just saw ur post about the odyssey and how fucking cool your mom was about it and um. almost cried! i love her please let her know how cool she is next time you talk to her. or like. thank her for being cool about this specific thing, i guarantee it'll make her day. wahh i love it when a parent encourages the weird shit their kid is into, not every parent is like that!! that's just SO GREAT, man
My mother is THEEEEE biggest nerd I know and I'm seeing her in two days to play D&D so that I can try to kill her and my partners with vampires. I had to interrupt my Odyssey tirade on Christmas to tell her to wait with her LOTR rant to see if I covered her point (actually I think I said "give me a fucking minute, I'm making a point here") and she immediately cracked up and went "I am SO proud of you actually" and I think it confused my in-laws even more than the fact that I had an Odyssey tirade locked and loaded. When I was a kid she told me that if I didn't like LOTR then I had to lie to her for the rest of her life. She fucking rules.
#MY MOM RULES ACTUALLY#and everyone she meets agrees with me#she's everyone's best friend within 30 minutes of meeting them#literally everyone in her neighborhood meets me and goes 'oh i know your mama!'#yeah bro i know you do#some of the people in her neighborhood heard that my dad was moving and went TO MOM to go 'hey do you need help moving'#and she went 'uhhhhhh no i am staying here'#and they went 'oh cool' and DID NOT extend the offer to my father#which is like. absolutely fucking brutal but also exactly the effect my mom has on Everyone.#rip to my dad because mom's getting their entire social circle in the divorce.#anyway i love her SO much and she's healthier than she's ever been in my life and i see her like at least once a week lately!!!!#i am thriving#anyway anon my point is that i tell my mom how great she is VERY REGULARLY but i will remember to mention it this week#before i try to kill her with vampires#also fun fact that the first time my mom played dnd she turned to me with this absolutely GRAVE expression on her face#and went 'it is so good i did not know about this when you were a child because i would not have remembered to feed either of us'#god she's such a fucking nerd. i aspire wholeheartedly to being as much of a nerd as she is when i'm her age.#asked and answered#anonymous#hi mom i know you're reading this and you fucking rule actually
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I almost forgot to post these sketchies! born from me and my friend fawning over the "baby clothes" that im getting for my plush baby coming in december
#i really cant wait for the wally darling plush#i cant wait to dress him#i forgot to post these cause i been fawning over groovy and such ahahah and life! in general!!#and being so! in general!#oooh staying up into the night lovingly lining#i rly rly love lineart u guys#now to go play a murder mystery game#i forgot a hair heart!!#how dare!!#i forgot tags!!#jazzsketches#wally darling#welcome home#whps#welcome home wally#i swear i have smth nice coming#holidays are brutal tho i love them SO!!
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Shigaraki/Tenko wanting to destroy the false sense of peace All Might and Heroes created
.⬇️.
Shigaraki/Tenko wanting to destroy everything that lead to the existence of that house, which he conceptualizes as the embodiment of rejection and injustice in the world. Be a Hero for the Villains.
.⬇️.
AFO basically literally created that house
.⬇️.
Shigaraki/Tenko helps defeat AFO
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Deku telling him 'you already destroyed it' is... apparently Shigaraki/Tenko having finally gotten rid of the true cause of (his) rejection and injustice? main antagonist's big problem that represents an overarching major issue of the story/in-universe society... solved? (main antagonist's big problem that represents an overarching major issue of the story/in-universe society not actually being the problem he thought it was but now also solved?)
.⬇️.
No longer a need for there to be a Hero for the Villains, Shigaraki/Tenko dies.
.⬇️.
Heroes not to be blamed in the first place. also fuck everyone else and all other 'actual' outcasts I guess.
#i understand that Tenko not having 'supposed' to be rejected doesn't mean the rejection didn't occur for the other League members#but taking that away from Tenko/Shigaraki - leader of the League of Villains - wanting to be their champion#symbolically being their collective grievances and wills condensed into one#taking that away makes the story a lot weaker#GOD what happened#nalslastworkingbraincell#honestly making everything AFO's fault#and making Tenko's main issue being his despair toward himself (created by AFO)#allowed for the (seemingly for now) clean resolution of 'get rid of the both of them' possible#It's AFO's fault? Kill him! Problem solved#Tenko's issue not actually *harm caused by other (non-AFO) people* but instead *harm caused by his self-conceptualization/his own self*?#Tenko's projecting his own self-loathing and anger onto the world and causing trouble for everyone and making his crusade meaningless?#let him die too. Pity but problem solved!#AFO gave him the specific quirk that was Decay because it was such a brutal and deadly quirk that would guarantee rejection#you cannot tell me he could've been fine after manifesting Decay if only AFO wasn't there to tell him he has an innate need to destroy#not after what we've seen of Shinsou and Toga#other 'normal' people would not have let him live a normal life#that *is* also very much a problem that should be addressed#but it was AFO who gave him Decay and Decay was also actually not naturally existing#so everything's fine! no changes for anyone!#all this could've been saved if this was transferred to AFO - AFO also seen as a victim of societal apathy#especially since he was BORN A TRASH RIVER RAT ORPHAN#but he's just a lonely guy who was too unpleasant to form real relationships#so. only real issue Hero Society ever had that needed to be addressed was civilians being too hard on Heroes#gotta love them more and demand less of them#yippee
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starlight
gunter/corrin
#fe14#gunter fire emblem#life has been brutal the last week but i promise i am drawing still. them. ;_:
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been binging tf outa Avatar the last airbender bc ive been puking my EVERLOVIN guts out since yesterday and hear me out
#remy would probably get cool weapons or somethin but honey im so sorry it would be the reality#sk8 squad#ollie#ponti#oscar#abio#kari#vinny#remy#im Just Now feeling like the worst is over but holy fuck talk about misery#and i Have to go to work tomorrow anyway since i had to call bc today was supposed to be the recovery day but nOOO body said fuck u#cause this is like the 3rd time this has happened this year alone like i refuse to believe its just a bunch of food poisoning instances???#i been eating the same for years and i know my immune systems been shot ever since covid but that was 4 years ago now somethin aint right#pray for my downstairs neighbors they had to hear me fighting for my life every 30 minutes PFFFT EEUUUAAGHGG HUFF HUFF HUFF yeah#although i will say all this shit has really toned down my emetophobia now everytime i gotta puke i just let out a long disappointed sigh#but goddamn still brutal tho
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