#lgbtq rants

[under-loch-n-key]

Not fanart today everyone, sorry. I will be uploading some within the week though!

I just need to vent and rant a bit.

I was feeling a bit rough today & made a venting self portrait piece for Pride Month. I've been out as trans for four years this November (26th of November) I’ve been on T three months and four days. I love who I am and my identity and wouldn’t change a thing, but sometimes I’m so tired.

I just want to love who I want to love. I want to wear what I want to wear without thinking “could this outfit that I wear today get me killed or harassed because it’s not in the norm?” I get fed up with having to conform to cisgender and heterosexual norms out of fear. I want to wear a dress and other pretty stuff again. I am cis passing so I’m privileged. I was cis passing before even starting T because I have naturally high T. So, me wearing feminine stuff scares me because I don’t want to get harassed for it. I have developed internalised toxic masculinity because of it. If I dye my hair I “may look gay” or “would people be able to tell I’m trans?” When in reality, I LOVE being queer, I LOVE being trans. It’s just hard. Being me is hard.

If I were to change my gender marker where I am, and if I were to get ovarian cancer and be in need of a hysterectomy, it wouldn’t be covered by insurance here because I am a man.

I am entitled to love, freedom, healthcare, happiness, marriage, not being turned away by businesses, or by churches/places that are meant to help all and help the community. I and everyone in this world is entitled to love, comfort, and living happily.

We have lost so many LGBTQIA+ people from this bigotry and hatred. It only seems to have spiralled even further since the pandemic or maybe because I came out in 2020 I’m just paying attention more…There’s people dead who should still be alive enjoying their favourite foods, drinks, films, etc. The people who bitch about how we are harming children, they’re “doing this for the children”, well guess what, every time you introduce more bigotry, you are killing a child. Not helping one. So, you can take the “help for the children” and shove it up your arse.

I sobbed tonite in my restroom because Nex Benedict and Brianna Ghey came into my head. They were so young and they are DEAD and for what? Because some fucking assholes just couldn’t handle the fact that LGBTQIA+ exist.

I’m TERRIFIED of dating people. Especially (cis) men because my brain goes to “Okay, is this person really interested in me or am I a fetish to them?” “If I go on a date with this guy tonite, will I come home later?” “What if he’s just trying to lure me somewhere and hurt me?”

THESE THOUGHTS SHOULD NOT BE NORMAL. I AM NOT A FETISH. I AM NOT A KINK. I AM NOT PROPERTY. I’M A HUMAN BEING.

Why can’t I just be human?

Why is it every time in the media there’s a criminal case and that person may or may not be gay, trans, or both, they hardly focus on the act itself but only on the fact that they were gay or transgender.

I am just SO fed up. Living in the states right now is a nightmare. I acknowledge that I’m privileged in ways that not many people have. I am in a blue state (for now), my mother is supportive, I have access to HRT and medical needs, I am white, I pass as a man. I am extremely privileged in those rights. I will never be able to even imagine how our gay and trans people of colour are treated. My heart breaks for them.

How many more of us is it going to take until we’re seen as people?

We’re not ped0phil3s, we’re not gr00mers, we aren’t out to harm your children, we didn’t steal a fucking rainbow from The Father Over Yonder, we aren’t working for Lucifer & if we are, I haven’t gotten my fucking pay cheque, we aren’t taking away healthcare from women, we aren’t taking over sports, etc. I could go on & on & on about this.

I can’t change who I am. Ironically, I loved being a woman. I loved my hair, my dresses, my makeup, my jewellery, the way some guys looked at me, I loved me. Although, something didn’t fit. I loved being a woman but something wasn’t right. I dressed goth, and then when I got home I dressed masculine. Even then, something didn’t click.

Then one day I was in middle school and I saw this girl named Maddy in my class. She was joking with a few of the boys in our class. She put her hair in her hat and made herself look like a boy and all the boys went “Woah! You really do look like a boy” and I was like “Huh, I wanna try that.”

So, I went home that day and messed around with it for a bit. Something felt better in me. I couldn’t explain it because I didn’t know what being trans was or what it meant. I went out like that any chance I could, unless I was around a boy or any preppy girls because I didn’t wanna get made fun of.

Eventually, one time in the store when I was walking away with my cousin from the register (still cis and in denial. Still an egg) the man at the register went “Have a good day, boys!” and we looked at each other and started laughing. Like omg, they called me a boy but I’m not a boy, right? It felt good & right.

You see, it wasn’t the dysphoria that made me figure out I was trans but the euphoria I felt from being called a man.

We have this heavy focus on the dysphoria (which I completely understand for people) but people forget about the euphoria too. I felt like something finally clicked but I couldn’t explain it.

That was until I started getting flooded with Trans TikToks and JammiDodger in my YouTube FYP and I was like “Haha, this is me. Wait-“

I didn’t realise I was trans until about 2020. Before I came out, (Oh, god, help me.. idk what egg me was thinking. I was so obvious..)I asked my mother while we were pulling into Walmart if I could get a binder and she’s like “What’s that?” and I said “Oh, to keep my chest flat. Since you know I love acting. So, do you think I could get one for when I play male roles? That way people couldn’t see that I’m a girl? Since you know I’m a girl who wants to play a male role.”

“Hmm, well sure, we can definitely do that. We’ll just have to see what I have to work with.” I was like hell yeah! I didn’t technically come out to my mother while I was in high school. She sorta just found out because she noticed everyone called me by my first trans name that I picked out and I was like “Uh- IT’S A NICKNAME BECAUSE I LOOK LIKE A CERTAIN ANIME CHARACTER WITH THE SAME NAME-“ I literally panicked.

Eventually, I kinda became like THE trans guy at my academy and since she was my English teacher, she found out through the words going around the school. It took her a while but she made it. We went and got the big chop. My hair was about three feet to four feet long and now it’s in the same style as Tony Stark’s hair or maybe even Shawn Spencer’s. Just that category of hair style. Lol. It’s very short now. I remember when she let me borrow her phone and I saw she changed my phone contact from my deadname to my old trans name. I took a picture of that and I still have it.

My name has since changed and I don’t have the same trans name I started out with. She’s still trying to switch over to using Anthony. She’s better than she used to be. I don’t mind being called by my old trans name per se but I just wish my name currently would be used more if that makes sense.

My mother is fully supportive of me now and we even got a pride cake a few days after my birthday (17th of June) because some dipshit at a store a town over threw a fit and destroyed a baker’s Pride cakes. Yeah, call US the snowflakes and yet you throw a fit about a rainbow on a cake? Yeah, okay. Lol. We got it from my mum’s friend who was giving pride cakes away to queer families after she found out about the incident.

Knowing that I have such supportive people means the world to me, but I know in some places that I go in the world, they won’t always be there to protect me. So, with that I’ve had to keep my guard up and protect myself.

I hope one day society will get to a place where we view everyone as people and that we’re all human. The LGBTQIA+ people we’ve lost will never be forgotten and we’ll always say their names. Please research our queer history. We could all learn stuff from each other.

If you’re ever feeling like your existence means nothing and that the world would be better off without you because of who you are, you are wrong. Your death isn’t something that just happens to you, it happens to everyone around you too. You would be missed because you’re loved and cherished. Knowing that you are also apart of this community with me, already makes me happy that you exist because we need more LGBTQIA+ voices. Our light and colours burn and shine brighter together so please do not go anywhere.

Thank you for existence. I love you. I’m proud of you for coming this far and we’ll go even further. We just have to make it through today. One day at a time. Everything will be okay and everything will turn out the way it’s supposed to.

If ANY of you are in need of immediate help please seek out The Trevor Project. They offer immediate help. It’s completely free and you can either text or call. I’ll leave a link for you below.

If you’ve made it to the end of this HUGE vent/rant, I’ll be sure to fluff some pillows for your eyes and get them some nice blankets because they must be tired as hell after reading this.

If you could reblog this so other LGBTQIA+ people who feel sad this pride could feel seen or just wanna reblog it for pride, please do!

If anyone can reblog this too with any other stories about their queer & trans experience or any other helpful info for LGBTQIA+ people & youth, that would also be really helpful!!

You are always safe on my blog. 💛⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🇵🇸🇸🇩🇨🇩

We can all benefit from helping each other, so also if you are able - please donate and help Operation Olive Branch for the people of Palestine, Sudan, and Congo! Remember, no one is free until we’re all free!! So, I’ll leave the link to their link tree here -

Link to Trevor Project here! They provide a lot of good info if you wanna research stuff too! -

[3scapethevoid]

Does anyone else just .... Casually ... Not feel platonic attraction at all

Like it's not even necessarily that you're antisocial, have social anxiety, are introverted, or whatever,

You just don't experience those feelings so it's hard to make friends

But you're lonely because you have no one to talk to so you make online friends instead but because you don't feel platonic attraction, the friendship is more alterous and/or queerplatonic in nature on your end because at a point, you know you feel something for them but it's something different than what they feel.

Erm... This turned into a mini vent /silly I was js asking if anyone related, my bad 😭

[queer-is-future]

so when straight people ask me why I say I’m “queer” or “gay” instead of sharing my actual identity as a panromantic demisexual non-binary sapphic queer I just tell them “ok look, when you’re talking to someone who isn’t local and they ask you where you’re from and you either say the name of the largest city nearby or ‘town name, suburb of large nearby city’ so they can get some geographical context of where you’re located right, bc they’re probably not going to know the name of the little town you actually live in.”

but if you’re talking to a local you can say the name of your actual town bc they have a greater chance of knowing where/what that is.

ok well when I’m talking to a straight person I start with queer bc chances are they aren’t as familiar with the context of all the little towns in that big queer city and need gps (gay positioning system) to find me.

if I’m talking to another queer person and I say I live in a suburb of gay city in a town called panromantic on the demisexual side of the tracks which is in the county of queer and I live off the intersection of non-binary and sapphic, they’d probably be able to find me with little to no problems, make sense?

[respectissexy]

Tumblr is currently serving me an ad for "Voda, the LGBTQ mental health app" offering "daily meditations, self-care and AI advice" and as a therapist I am begging you not to download an app where an AI tries to help you with your mental health. Please do not. They tried to have an AI chatbot counsel eating disorder patients and it told them to diet. That shit is not safe. Do not talk to an AI about your mental health please. You don't need to talk to a professional but talk to a PERSON. Edited to add: OK, it's been a long day and I wrote this when I only had the information that was in the ad. It looks like they may not actually have a chatbot, but something that just... churns out pre-programmed advice? That's genuinely a lot safer! But calling it "AI advice" feels a little misleading. This app may be perfectly fine and safe to use, but should probably stick to the fundamentals that people want from a mental health app and not try to use AI hype to market, since the intersection of AI and mental health support is VERY DICEY and bad shit has happened there before. And you should probably do further research on how they are using your data, since that is also an area where mental health support apps have gone bad before.

[ghostlyfroggy]

Why would I care if other people my age are dating? Other people my age are in jail.

Stop pushing your heteronormative ideals on me, I just want to watch silly cartoons and cuddle with my cats.

[a-rabbit-obsessed-queer]

Aspec men deserve much more respect and recognition in the aspec community than they receive. They often face a different form of aphobia specific to them ("men are naturally sexual they can't be ace" "all men are unromantic that's not unique") this rhetoric is spouted by many, even members of our own community and I hope for a day where that is no longer the case. As an ace and demiro woman (demigirl but that's beside the point) I want to encourage folks to take the time to give the aspec men in their lives support and to the aspec men reading, you are who you say you are no matter what people say and you deserve the world. I'm sorry for the ways in which toxic masculinity has harmed you. You are a valued member of the aspec community and the queer community as a whole. No ace or aro person is broken and neither are you. I'm sorry if anyone has ever told you otherwise.

[itsbansheebitch]

Rants at the Hairdresser

her, behind me trimming my hair: "it's so wild how big cars are. Seems a bit dangerous, ya know?"

me, enjoying the smell of the stuff she sprayed in my hair: "Yeah, apparently that's because it's cheaper to have a car classified as a 'light truck' since you can get past safety regulations and they have different frames."

her, who has paused working on my hair: "Wait, are you serious?"

me: "Yeah, apparently it's a lot cheaper for companies to do that. And it really sucks since driving one of those cars is super dangerous, but it's even more dangerous for other people, especially if they're in a smaller car. Since it would be more safe to be another driver if they ALSO have a 'light truck,' everyone is caught in a cycle of getting bigger and bigger cars. All of which are extremely dangerous and have made being a pedestrian even more dangerous."

her: deep in thought, silent.

me, happy that someone is letting me rant about this: "Oh, the new Cadillacs are the size of tanks. That's not an exaggeration, by the way."

her, stunned: ???? "what the actual hell???"

we're silent for a bit

her, hesitantly, since I look like white trash and she has at least 10 piercings and pink hair: "I feel like America has been that way for a while... ya know?"

me: "Oh yeah, I totally get what you're saying, like, putting profit over people's safety?"

her, assured now that she knows we're both too commie pilled for this kind of conversation with someone else: "Yes! Exactly! It really sucks, right?"

me: "God, tell me about it"

I was very happy with my haircut, btw. She's so good at her job. :D

[luzxii]

Btw please block me if you think any varient of aromantics, asexuals or aroaces don't belong in the LGBTQ community (including cishet aros and aros/aces/aroaces who feel attraction.. my god y'all they don't get a free pass to exclude)

I'm not aroace myself, but I will NEVER stand for the blatant aphobia present in the community.

[k-is-for-potassium]

i feel like many people use "straight"...wrong

it's used a lot to mean cis, het, allo, perisex, etc.

basically just not lgbtq+ at all

but that's not true

trans people can be straight and lgbtq+

intersex people can be straight and lgbtq+

neopronoun users can be straight and lgbtq+

arospec people can be straight and lgbtq+

acespec people can be straight and lgbtq+

polyamorous people can be straight and lgbtq+

genderfluid, bigender, and other gender non-conforming people can be straight and lgbtq+

people who are biromantic, panromantic, etc. and heterosexual or vice versa are still lgbtq+

and there are so many more identities that can absolutely be both

straight does not mean not lgbtq+

[messy-di-voce]

Just a reminder that you (yes, you) are always queer enough. While yes it can be a spectrum, if you fall anywhere on it you have the right to identify as such. There’s so such thing as being more bisexual or more asexual than someone else. You also can’t be a bad aromantic or a bad pansexual.

You just are. And that’s enough :)

[happypotato48]

This Is A Gay Asian Rant About BL Comments Made By Some Queer Westerners I See Sometimes.

So you know of those gays (usually white) that made dumb tiktok dancing to list of countries that legalized same sex marriage and list of countries that discriminate against LGBTQIA+ poeple as a way to say something racist. yeah i kinda got the same vibes from some comments regard how asian BL is homophobic just cause they don't live up to queer western standard. look, i'm not saying that some BLs and their creators don't deserve criticism regard how they capitalized/exploited queerness for an easy cash grab.

But people need to understand that Asian countries despite recent progress are still very much culturally conservatives. so when people says that thai bl is homophobic and all the characters looks like bunch of straight guys, which is true for some olders thai BLs i'm not gonna denied that. but after all this time and newer BLs generally being very queer and most of creators being out queer themself and poeple still making these comments, i'm annoyed.

And don't get me start on the actors. you don't know them! why are you making assumption and calling them queerbaiter just cause they acts in bl. like maybe they're straight, maybe they're not but what they're definitely doing is making queer content for you know, queer people here. so when you made halfass comments about their sexuality what do you think that made other queer people who still in the closet feels. and when you add the nationality to that, "these thai bl pair are this and that, this korean actor is so ungrateful for his bl past", etc. when our societies are still very much still in progress regard LGBTQIA+ acceptance. it make us living here feels fucking awful like somehow we're lesser queer than people in the west just cause we don't have citibank at pride or some shit.

And the shittiest in my humbled opinion are comments regard censored chinese bls. people do know like, that the creators making these bls are risking their livelihoods for this. that these shows getting make at all are miracles. yes it sucked that they're censored but they're still very much queer shows making by queer people who want to express thier queerness despite the chinese government being the chinese government. when people dimissing these shows as not belonging in queer media, you're also dimissing their creators and audiences as not belonging in the community.

Look what i want to say is that we're trying our best over here, and maybe our best are not up to your liking. the ways we talk and express our queerness maybe still can be perceived as problematic by western queer standard. but these media are our house and you're the guests. for people aren't shitty we appreciated that you're here engaging and loving our media, this is your home too and you're welcome in it. i can speak for myself that i very much love being here on tumblr and interacting with people from all over the world who love BL. but for people who are being shitty sometimes about asian bl.

YOU'RE THE GUESTS, BEHAVE!

[sapphic-sprite]

A reminder that lesbians need abortions too. There are tons of reasons why a lesbian might need an abortion so kindly stop saying we are lucky we don’t have to worry about the current state of the US. It’s stupid that I even have to say this and I’m tired of seeing the take that we shouldn’t have to worry about abortion access being taken away in many states.

[blairelythere]

If you're into sissy stuff, more power to you. There is nothing inherently wrong with it, and it has its own place in the kink community.

However.

If you directly compare having a sissy kink to being transfem, you're hurting a whole lot of people.

I'm a woman.

I go to work as a woman.

I have dinner as a woman.

I file my taxes as a woman.

I drive to doctors appointments as a woman.

I have sex as a woman.

Nothing about what I do is for pretend or for guilt-induced pleasure.

When sissy porn blogs like and reblog my pictures, I am directly compared to people who have a kink for being forced into feminization as a man, typically by other men.

Do you understand how invalidating that is?

I don't belong in that space. By putting me there, you are saying that I am just a hyper-feminised man, which I am NOT.

If you want to support the trans community AND have a sissy kink, don't fucking reblog my shit onto your sissy porn blog.

We don't belong there.

[your-local-crypt1d]

Oh so when a priest takes an oath of celibacy he's "a man of faith", but when I say I'm Ace and sex-repulsed I'll "change my mind" and "haven't found the right person yet" 🙄

[1mlostnow]

HEY! Hey. hey. hey..

If you’re an mlm shipper. Listen to this…

It is blatantly homophobic. To always make. One of them. The twink. And one. The bear. It is homophobic. To always make. One of them. Feminine and sub. And one masc and top. Quit doing that. It’s. Just. Homophobic. To always want one to be the ‘woman’, and another to be the ‘man’.

Yk how most gays hate being asked “who wears the pants in the relationship?” Yeah? Think about it. That’s exactly what you’re doing. This goes out to many different communities. And also applies to wlw/gnc relationships.

Will Graham is not as feminine as fics and Art like to make him seem. Neither is Castiel. Or James Wilson.

There doesn’t always have to be a ‘man’ and a ‘woman’ in queer relationships. That’s the whole fucking point. RB if you agree because I am so mad rn.

An edit to the original post : please check out all additions and reblogs. I have made multiple edits and adjustments through rbs after receiving feedback on this post :))

Another insert : key word is always. We see it less recently, but it’s still prevalent and still a harmful stereotype to push queer relationships into.

Third and hopefully final addition : please don’t explain your kinks to me. I’m a minor.

[theautisticfroglord]

I genuinely hate when people invalidate demiromantic/demisexual/other labels in general by saying somethin like "OMG!!!! why do these labels exist that's how every relationship is!!!!! what has this generation come to?!!?,!?!!"

some people out here are dating someone they just met two days ago. while it literally took me two whole years of getting to know someone before having a crush on them. can y'all please not find excuses to invalidate aspec/arospec people. thanks