#lgbt questioning

[bunnytown-central]

Posting on a side blog also I’m too scared to ask this in a community chat so I hope this reaches the tag..

Large vent about my own personal identity:

Under the cut bc it is a LOT of explaining/venting

I don’t know where else to put this but I kinda have a weird apprehension with referring to myself/identifying with any less “mainstream” lgbt term. Like I found the term aegosexual and it fit me perfectly, but I felt kind of apprehensive to refer to myself as that like I wasn’t even sure, like I had to meet some criteria to do so ?? It fits but I feel kind of like I’m not actually it, it’s weird!! Maybe bc of how I saw ppl act towards stuff like this, idk

Like right now, I kinda feel like being a woman gives you a lot of constraints on your appearance and how you should act, and I do sometimes wonder what that makes me because I don’t have dysphoria, I just find being a woman tiring, but at the same time I know I’m not a *man*, I just want to do stuff like feel like I shouldn’t have to shave my body hair or wear dresses over pants since fancy dresses that are form-fitting and have cuts for the leg made me feel self conscious, plus pants are more comfortable to me, but I’m afraid that doesn’t make me need a label and like I’m looking for excuses? I don’t even know because I’m so uncertain and feel like I’m looking for excuses to be in a group, but I don’t see that many lgbt people or any groups in Southwestern USA so I have no ppl to compare with so I have no idea!

Like, I sometimes have something happen to me and I have an internal flash of “this wouldn’t happen if I wasn’t a woman” but at the same time I know that being a man isn’t what I want. Like what I really want is to just want to be not held down by feminine stereotypes and only feel like that when I want to. But. I don’t know if that necessitates a label or if I’m just complaining about something ghrgrggrrgrhrggr But at the same time I don’t want to change my pronouns I don’t know!!!

And I get that labels aren’t everything! And many find them restrictive, but this has always been how I’ve done things, I personally categorize things like feelings because it helps me pinpoint and describe what they are better. But I can’t bring myself to do it when it comes to something as integral to your identity as sexuality or gender. It’s too much pressure so to speak

But at the same time I feel like if I do choose a label I feel like I’m not actually feeling it and that I’m just picking one to be part of a group or something and this is really hard 😭 I keep seeing ppl say that when they know they are something, the term makes something in their mind just click, I think im just trying to look for that but im too scared ppl will say im faking or dont count or something. Like. someone accusing me of faking it is a PRIMAL fear I have.

And honestly? That’s how I feel about if I should use the term bisexual! So, there were a lot of times where I’ve fallen in love/had crushes on men, real and fictional. But. There’s also MULTIPLE accounts of me being into women/fem aligned ppl. But the thing is they were all fictional. Like nearly 98% were fictional women. But they weren’t anything short lived, I remember having a crush on one fem character for nearly a year, a legitimate crush, as in reading “imagines”, “x reader” fanfics, looking at art, and listening to fanmade voice acting of the character for days in a row like it was a ritual (if you’re curious, it was Spinel). This also happened AGAIN recently, but with a friend’s OC that I just gravitated to since August of last year, and I still feel infatuated, just to a lesser extent. I’ve made at least 2 lesbian couples as characters when I was in grade school. I still have a lot of feelings for some of my own female characters to this day!

But I feel like that doesn’t count. Like what, I’m bisexual just because I like fictional women but not actual real-life women?? I feel like a NEET, I have to be attracted to IN REAL LIFE women in order to actually consider myself bisexual. It ALSO feels like I’m looking too hard to be in a group when I think this but it’s obviously something if it’s still happening! Do fictional women count if it’s only fictional women and not irl women??? But I also do sometimes find some real life women attractive aesthetically or have attractive qualities to me, but I don’t feel infatuated towards them bc they’re actual ppl… maybe I am aegosexual aldgskdjl I WANT TO GO TO A MORE DIVERSE PART OF THE US THAN THIS SO I CAN ACTUALLY GET A FOCUS GROUP!!!

Anyway yeah, I just needed to get this off my chest because my own insecurities are holding me back from exploring, I wish my mind would just get a grip already and figure it out. Like “hmmmmm I wonder if I’m bisexual or not, I guess I’ll never know :(“ <- (literally thought about making/drawing a butch lesbian ursula character today and yesterday, has said they would date their own masc-aligned nb character) like come the fuck onnn

[buddieinmybeddie]

LGBTQ+ folk what was your gender/sexuality pipeline?

[imiggytheartist]

LGBT in fighting is fucking dumb and I’m super tired of yall’s stupidity. The fascists who run the government do not care that you are “Not like the other queers”. The fascists do not care that you hates it when bisexual women are taking their straight boyfriends to pride. The fascists do not care that you are a gay person who hates trans people with a passion. The fascists do not care that you are a trans person who hates non-binary people with a passion. The fascists do not care that you are a queer person who bullies 12 year old kids on tik tok who use fox/foxself pronouns and identify as fox gender. Hating each other will not make the homophobes go away. I don’t care how many times you say “But these people in the community make everyone else in the community look bad.” Fascists think we are all the same they will not single any of us out just because some of us have the same opinions as the fascists/Alt right. They are not passing anti trans laws because some trans people are too loud and cringey they are doing it because they hate all trans people. They are not passing anti gay laws because some gay people are too loud and cringey they are doing it because they hate gay people. FASCISTS DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR OPINIONS THEY WILL KILL YOU REGARDLESS! FASCISTS DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR OPINION THEY WILL KILL YOU REGARDLESS! FASCISTS DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR OPINION THEY WILL KILL YOU REGARDLESS! Do you understand me?

[magicstar16]

Everyone… I think I’m Nebulasexual

For those that don’t know, Nebulasexual means you can’t tell if you experience sexual attraction due to neurodiversity, and considering how much I’ve been wondering if I’m ace or just “haven’t met the one” yet, I think I fit the bill. Plus I’m audhd so… yeah.

[incognitopolls]

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[cookthepenguin]

is this fr? do people really use pickup lines?

[cuntnikida]

btw the a+ in lgbtqia+ stands for a+ as in a really good grade so remember to do your homowork and get good gays.

disclaimer: i accept and support asexual and aromantic people. please stop sending me hate anons calling me aphobic and telling me to kill myself.

[sw33tm0urningl4mb]

Deep/Fun Questions to Ask!

Do you like watching sunsets?

Have you ever started a rumor?

What makes you laugh hard?

What's the last concert you went to?

If you believed in it, what would you be reincarnated to?

What's your current vocal stim?

What shirt are you wearing?

Who or what is on your mind?

What are your favorite pair of shoes?

What would easily win you over if someone gave you it?

What three words describe you?

What's a funny memory you have?

Do you have any drunk stories?

What's one thing you own that you're sure no one else has?

Do you have any superstitions?

What is your guilty pleasure?

What weird thing do you do when you're alone?

What is the worst food you've ever had?

What fictional character would you bring to life if you could?

If you could join a career immediately, what would it be?

What keeps you going during the day?

Current song on repeat?

Funniest inside joke?

What's your favorite piece of jewelry you own?

Favorite niche topic?

What fandom are you currently in?

Most controversial take?

Favorite ship and why?

Do you have any piercings or tattoos, and what are they?

What is your worst & best quality?

[myreblogssss]

plz reblog for bigger sample, I'm genuinely curious, sorry there's no middle ground

[r3golith2]

Transphobes hate us whether or not we go by neopronouns. You are not quirky or cool because you hate neopronouns & the people who use them.

We will never meet their expectations, so accusing certain trans people as being the problem makes you just as bad as transphobic people.

You don't have to understand it to be respectful. Calling someone "xe/xem" or "bun/bunself" isn't going to make you combust into a million pieces. As long as they aren't hurting anyone, let them live.

[publicbreath2020]

Phew 😥

She accepts me, yay!!! 🎉

[touratoura]

I would like to make a probably invisible poll for the LGBTQ people of Tumblr. Sorry you can’t do multiple, just try and choose the one most important to you! Gray-anything fits here too.

[bloomshroomz]

So, we're ten days into pride month. Things are a bit confusing for me right now. I’m trying to figure out what I want, or what I need.

I know that I’m aromantic, but…

I want companionship. I want commitment.

I want to kiss someone. I want to make out with someone.

I want to cuddle and watch a movie with someone.

I want to spoil someone. I want to be spoiled.

I want to love someone. I want to be loved.

I want emotional intimacy. I want physical intimacy.

I want these things with multiple people.

I don’t see any of that as inherently romantic… Maybe it would be easier if I did? Something about that feels wrong, somehow. Why do I have to slap a romantic label on it by default, when I know that none of these things need to be confined to romance?

People aren’t usually committed to you unless you’re their partner. I’d like to have a few partners. Do I want that to be romantic, though? I mean, I know that I don’t want it to be romantic, because I don't want anything to be romantic. But, am I opposed to it?

I don’t know. I can’t tell.

Most people would call these feelings romantic. Why does it feel so much more complicated to me? Why do I have this weird disconnect?

Sometimes I feel like it would be easier if I just tossed out the aromantic part of who I am. Just being bisexual would make things so simple. But I don't think I can just flip a switch like that. Can I?

Do other people feel this way?

Is it just me?

Edit - 6/20/2024

A lot of people have been giving me the same advice over and over, and while I appreciate the sentiment, I've probably heard it before. Like, a lot of "you should look into QPRs/cupioromanticism/bellusromanticism/etc." when I've already known about those things for years.

Please read this post before giving advice or input, especially if it involves labels or attraction/relationship types. I know a lot about labels and attraction/relationship types; my struggle isn't coming from a lack of vocabulary. Thank you.

[incognitopolls]

Obergefell v. Hodges is the US Supreme Court case in which the Supreme Court ruled that same-sex couples have the right to marry.

–

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[marzipanandminutiae]

brought to you by "The Myth of Lesbian Impunity: Capital Laws from 1270 to 1791" by Louis Crompton

when you first start studying queer history: sapphic acts have basically never been criminalized in any western society! so queer women have always had it easier than queer men!

when you delve even the slightest bit deeper: why do we still believe this

(OP cannot control who does and does not reblog this post, but she firmly believes that trans women are women)