#let's ESPECIALLY talk about trees
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People think Lord Debling is boring, but as someone who is in love with and fascinated by the same things, he'd be the perfect person to info dump with. Then he'd leave me alone for three years and let me live my life and study my own interests deeper? He's perfect.
#Bridgerton#lord debling#lets be naturalist together bro#lets talk about birds#and plants#and trees#let's ESPECIALLY talk about trees#I am begging
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B'Elanna, Neelix, Tuvok and Chakotay needed to star in an episode where they just talked about their different beliefs and approaches to spirituality/religion. Paired off and all together. I need to gain more insight. I need characterization and I need it to be messy.
#B'Elanna's difficulty with Klingon myths and religion (especially due to her internalized racism)#Chakotay's current strong belief in his own spirituality despite his initial complete rejection of it (and how B'Elanna seems to admire#and have talked with Chakotay about it extensively in the past given how many specifics she's aware of)#Neelix's belief in an afterlife being the only thing that comforted him after his entire family was killed - the knowledge that he would be#able to reunite with them again and that knowledge being ripped away from him#Does he still believe? Are there other aspects of his previous spiritual beliefs that are thrown into question?#Just because it isn't 'real' does it make it unimportant? How do we even know whether or not it's 'real'?#He died and doesn't remember reaching that tree and seeing his family - does that mean it didn't happen?#Tuvok's line in 'Innocence' about how he's begun to have doubts about whether or not a katra exists and what happens after someone dies#and his firm ties to Vulcan spirituality and ritual#ALL SO INTERESTING!!!!!!!!#star trek voyager#I don't think it'd be a calm or healthy conversation either - they're not therapists and I don't think anyone but Chakotay#would be particularly careful with his words#and before you say Tuvok's a Vulcan so he would be let me remind you that Tuvok told B'Elanna to her face that he thought Klingons#were basically savages - he is INDELICATE to say the least#Neelix is careful with his words bc he's a people pleaser for survival but also he has a tendency to bother people and be overly pushy#and I think he'd do a lot of research and be the one leading the conversation/the reason they get on the topic and continue on it#B'Elanna wouldn't want to talk about it. She wants to talk about it the least. But she must!!!! Bc the episode demands it!!#st voy
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HTTYD AU idea that I’ll never write because I have too many projects, one a personal rewrite of the HTTYD universe following a potential outcome where the kids all follow Hiccup into exile via dragon back, and speed running the events of RoB, DoB, and RTTE in the span of a few years. ANYWAYS
Snotlout and Hiccup are cousins, but Spitelout, being Spitelout, starts dropping earworms in Snotlout’s ears about how Hiccup will never be Chief, being too small and sickly and un-vikingkly. Only this is when Snotlout and Hiccup are smol, and somewhat close-ish, as little kids tend to be before they get older and start developing an awareness of their surroundings.
Baby Snotlout hears this and comes to the five-year old child logical conclusion that he must protect his smaller cousin from everyone who might hurt him, so he can have the chance to grow up big and strong like everyone else, and be the bestest chief ever!
Snotlout earns a reputation of biting any adult or child who comes within three feet of Hiccup. Not even Stoick is safe from this treatment. Snotlout bit and got into a five-year old child’s equivalent of a fistfight with a sheep that accidentally knocked Hiccup over. No one’s safe. He insists he is protecting the tribes future awesome and amazing chief.
The years pass on. Snotlout is still stubbornly protecting his cousin, but as they get older it’s different. He grows to learn that his cousin is just small, but Snotlout is adamant Hiccup will be a great chief. Because he has a witty tongue that leave adults flabbergasted, and is slippery when the other kids start picking on him, and Hiccup will have Snotlout, who will obviously grow to take his own fathers place as general, and so that means he can just protect Hiccup from all the bigger scary stuff like rival chiefs and dragons so Hiccup can be Chief without worry.
Hiccup does not get relentlessly bullied because his brawny, overprotective cousin throws hands at any slight insult to Hiccup. Hiccup learns how to talk down people from other tribes who aren’t so persuasive much earlier than he does in the show because some boy from another tribe gave him a funny look and his stupidly loyal cousin ran across the room to try and throw him into a table.
When Hiccup thinks he shot down a Night Fury, none of the kids say anything mean spirited about the chaos that followed, because Nsorlout had made a reputation. When they start dragon training, Snotlout and Hiccup get the lowest marks at first because Snotlout heard “Grab a shield” and decided to use himself as a shield for Hiccup, which his cousin does NOT like
It is not Astrid that gets taken out on a flight on the back of a Night Fury, but Snotlout, who wondered where his cousin was spending his free time, because Snotlout at least understands privacy and isn’t hovering over Hiccup 24/7, but also saw how pissed Astrid was at losing and came to find his cousin before she did so she wouldn’t try anything. It is Snotlout, clutching his cousin and screaming as a dragon tries to kill him on his back, because his cousin is his best friend and he has decided he doesn’t want to share. Snotlout is nervous later about the Monstrous Nightmare that his cousin leads to his open hand, but he trusts his cousin, and so touches the dragon.
Snotlout and Toothless do not get along at first, Snotlout protective of his cousin and Toothless protective of his best friend and neither of them wanting to share with the other. Hiccup walks around a corner to see the pair of them going at it with each other, because they couldn’t agree on who was going to follow Hiccup and make sure he was safe. The day Toothless and Snotlout finally start getting along is the day Hocvup realizes he will never know peace again, because there is a Night Fury and his stubborn cousin who’d fistfight Odin if he so much as looked at Hiccup wrong, and of course a Monstrous Nightmare, because Hookfang isn’t going anywhere without Snotlout, so he too is also following Hicvup and making sure he’s safe. Hiccup eventually reminds himself of the alternative and forces himself to live with his two and a half protective, self-appointed bodyguards.
Snotlout is stubborn and loyal and has a very hard time letting Hiccup defend himself in a physical manner at first, but learns to let Hiccup fight his own battles. So long as Snotlout and Hookfang are nearby in case someone fights dirty or cheats or Hiccup has a bad day and decides to let his cousin have at it. He doesn’t once think of trying to become Chief, and Spitelout doesn’t know what to do with a son that refuses to try and take leadership because he’s too darn determined to make sure his scrawny fishbone cousin grows to be Berks Chief. And he can’t complain about it because it’s kinda all his fault anyways.
#just give me stupid and still Snotlout but a Snotlout who is ride-or-die for his little cousin#I full-heartedly believe Snotlout’s the older of the pair#and not because it adds to the effect of this AU#Hiccup still has a hard time making friends. and it’s still because of his cousin#but it’s because his cousin is glaring from around the corner and stressing out the person hiccup is talking to#he’s even less subtle with toothless#especially once Astrid and Hiccup start dating#Astrid can feel Snotlout glaring with toothless from the trees and she can’t say anything about it#because hiccup will just pick whichever tree he thinks his cousin and dragon are hiding in and starts yelling at it#she wants to enjoy their dates dang it#not spend half of it listening to her boyfriend yelling at his cousin and dragon about letting him enjoy a date for gods sake#hiccup haddock#snotlout jorgenson#httyd#httyd au
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all this talk about wanting to fight bosses in their prime in the dlc is so annoying istg. “i want to fight prime godfrey” brother that was prime godfrey he isn’t getting any stronger. just go fight him rl1 with no stat boosting and a +0 weapon. there you go, prime daddy loux.
#it’s like the whole pre nerf radahn bs#yeah cool you fought him when he still had trash hit boxes congrats#literally they didn’t even nerf him they just fixed him#and accidentally tweaked his health in the process but they put it back to what it should be in the next patch#the way folks talk about it you’d think he was a completely different fight#the funny thing is though i still remember ppl complaining like fuck about him before that fix#anyway would really rather not have repeat bosses from the main game#especially the main bosses#imagine waiting two possibly three years for a dlc only to fight the same guys again but this time they have a few new attacks#besides you just know that if they add bosses from the main game it'll be things like tree spirits or avatars lol#or more watchdogs and godskins#oh god lets not speak that into existence#elden ring
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Margaret of Anjou’s visit to Coventry [in 1456], which was part of her dower and that of her son, Edward of Lancaster, was much more elaborate. It essentially reasserted Lancastrian power. The presence of Henry and the infant Edward was recognised in the pageantry. The ceremonial route between the Bablake gate and the commercial centre was short, skirting the area controlled by the cathedral priory, but it made up for its brevity with no fewer than fourteen pageants. Since Coventry had an established cycle of mystery plays, there were presumably enough local resources and experience to mount an impressive display; but one John Wetherby was summoned from Leicester to compose verses and stage the scenes. As at Margaret’s coronation the iconography was elaborate, though it built upon earlier developments.
Starting at Bablake gate, next to the Trinity Guild church of St. Michael, Bablake, the party was welcomed with a Tree of Jesse, set up on the gate itself, with the prophets Isaiah and Jeremiah explaining the symbolism. Outside St. Michael’s church the party was greeted by Edward the Confessor and St. John the Evangelist; and proceeding to Smithford Street, they found on the conduit the four Cardinal Virtues—Righteousness (Justice?), Prudence, Temperance, and Fortitude. In Cross Cheaping wine flowed freely, as in London, and angels stood on the cross, censing Margaret as she passed. Beyond the cross was pitched a series of pageants, each displaying one of the Nine Worthies, who offered to serve Margaret. Finally, the queen was shown a pageant of her patron saint, Margaret, slaying the dragon [which 'turned out to be strictly an intercessor on the queen's behalf', as Helen Maurer points out].
The meanings here are complex and have been variously interpreted. An initial reading of the programme found a message of messianic kingship: the Jesse tree equating royal genealogy with that of Christ had been used at the welcome for Henry VI on his return from Paris in 1432. A more recent, feminist view is that the symbolism is essentially Marian, and to be associated with Margaret both as queen and mother of the heir rather than Henry himself. The theme is shared sovereignty, with Margaret equal to her husband and son. Ideal kingship was symbolised by the presence of Edward the Confessor, but Margaret was the person to whom the speeches were specifically addressed and she, not Henry, was seen as the saviour of the house of Lancaster. This reading tips the balance too far the other way: the tableau of Edward the Confessor and St. John was a direct reference to the legend of the Ring and the Pilgrim, one of Henry III’s favourite stories, which was illustrated in Westminster Abbey, several of his houses, and in manuscript. It symbolised royal largesse, and its message at Coventry would certainly have encompassed the reigning king. Again, the presence of allegorical figures, first used for Henry, seems to acknowledge his presence. Yet, while the message of the Coventry pageants was directed at contemporary events it emphasised Margaret’s motherhood and duties as queen; and it was expressed as a traditional spiritual journey from the Old Testament, via the incarnation represented by the cross, to the final triumph over evil, with the help of the Virgin, allegory, and the Worthies. The only true thematic innovation was the commentary by the prophets.
[...] The messages of the pageants firmly reminded the royal women of their place as mothers and mediators, honoured but subordinate. Yet, if passive, these young women were not without significance. It is clear from the pageantry of 1392 and 1426 in London and 1456 in Coventry that when a crisis needed to be resolved, the queen (or regent’s wife) was accorded extra recognition. Her duty as mediator—or the good aspect of a misdirected man—suddenly became more than a pious wish. At Coventry, Margaret of Anjou was even presented as the rock upon which the monarchy rested. [However,] a crisis had to be sensed in order to provoke such emphasis [...]."
-Nicola Coldstream, "Roles of Women in Late Medieval Civic Pageantry," "Reassessing the Roles of Women as 'Makers' of Medieval Art and Culture"
#historicwomendaily#margaret of anjou#my post#henry vi#yeah I don't necessarily agree with Laynesmith's interpretation (that it was essentially Marian with an emphasis on shared sovereignty)#which she herself says is 'admittedly very speculative'#as this book points out that interpretation tips the balance too far on the other side and has a somewhat selective reading#It's also important to remember that this interpretation was not really reflected across wider Lancastrian propaganda at the time#which isn't really talked about - let alone emphasized - as much by historians but remained focused on the King#For example: look at the pro-Lancastrian poem 'The Ship of State' which hails Henry VI as a 'noble shyp made of good tree'#and emphasizes how he was widely supported and defended by many great Lancastrian lords and the crown prince#but not Margaret who was entirely absent#also look at the book 'Knyghthode and Bataile' (presented to Henry) and Fortescue's various pro-Lancastrian texts in the 1460s#even the recording of that Yorkist trial which was iirc reported in the 1459 attainder#all of these were entirely conventional and highlighted the presence and importance of the King. Margaret was not emphasized.#so either the Lancastrians were impossibly inconsistent about what message they actually wanted to convey about the role of their own queen#or the Coventry pageants were not actually meant to emphasize Margaret in the lieu of Laynesmith's interpretation#and would not have been viewed in such a manner by contemporaries#I think we should also keep in mind that we don't really know what Henry VI's condition was like at the time of MoA's entry to Coventry#we know he had been injured in St. Albans and had only just recovered from his second illness#this is especially important to consider since we know he had also arrived at Coventry before Margaret but much more discreetly#and was not welcomed by any pageants that we know of. This is VERY unusual and can be best explained if we consider the fact that he#may have simply not been in the right state (be it physical or state of mind) for it at the time#in which case the pageants for Margaret should be viewed as more of a improvisation/cover-up/temporary measure to bolster prestige#or Henry may have deliberately taken a more discreet role to emphasize the position of his heir - especially important after the long wait#imo I think Kipling's interpretation (ie: that they addressed Margaret but really referenced the prince & heir) makes a lot more sense:#'Coventry [...] regarded Margaret's entry as a kind of triumph-by-proxy: the Queen entered the city but Coventry received its Prince'#though I think he tends to view Margaret as more of a cipher (and has a very questionable view of Henry VI) which I also don't agree with.#The pageants very much DID focus on and reference her but they most prominently emphasized her 'motherhood and duties as queen'#ie: I think Kipling and Laynesmith tip too far on opposite sides and I think this interpretation takes the most realistic middle ground
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Major respect and gratitude to all these wonderful artists and logical people!! I'm an amateur artist myself who has never seen the appeal in AI art at all, or just AI in general, but I never really thought too much on how the situation affects people with disabilities. This thread though shows me and other regular people how free and creative art is. And how "Art" as a concept really doesn't have any limitations! You don't need a robot to do something that only a human can truly understand, and you shouldn't have to!
Thanks for sharing all your POV's on this situation and I'm glad we still have some sensible people in such a shitty world. <3
Plus, AI just sucks overall.
"ai is making it so everyone can make art" Everyone can make art dipshit it came free with your fucking humanity
#Storytime in the tags lets gooooo#So! I actually never used to have much of a hatred towards AI art#especially when it was first starting out back in late 2020.#I was actually fascinated at the prospect of someone just being able to plug in a few prompts and then having a masterpiece in like.#2 seconds.#I still find amusement in taking a quick peak at free art bots from time to time. But that's all just for shits and giggles.#I don't really consider that “Supporting AI.” I just find it fun#Anywhizzle. All of this changed for me back in I think 2021 or 2022. I can't remember which year :p#I was watching a video discussing the discourse behind AI art and how much it was growing. Back then I was starting to see the flaws in AI#and how destructive a robot with sentience can be. It's like taking that one joke about workers being replaced by robots and making it real#So when I watched this video and they started talking about this odd anime movie I'd never heard about and how all the backgrounds were-#-done in AI. I was pretty pissed. Never before had I heard of anything like this. A whole fucking movie. With beautiful backgrounds that-#-shouldn't even be possible to draw. Was done in AI.#I looked back at all the real art I'd seen over the past like 3 years that I'd been on the internet. I have seen livestreams where artists-#-that I looked up to (And still kinda do) spent 2 whole hours on backgrounds for just one single comic page!#I read Evan Stanley's fan comic and knew that all those beautiful and geometrically accurate backgrounds were drawn by hand!#I HAD GONE THROUGH THE ENTIRE PROCESS OF GROWING MY ART STYLE FROM SCRATCH OVER THE COURSE OF TWO WHOLE YEARS.#I LOOKED AT ALL THESE ARTISTS THAT I LOOKED UP TO AND SAW THEIR BACKGROUNDS AND THEN LOOKED AT MINE AND-#-I THEN REALIZED HOW FUCKING DEDICATED THEY ALL WERE TO PULL OFF SUCH MASTERPIECES.#I KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO JUST DRAW A TREE. OR A ROCK. OR A HILL THAT ONLY GETS 1/4 OF IT SHOWN IN THE FINAL PRODUCT.#And then I looked at the AI art in the background of the video... And I was PISSED.#But I didn't realize the full extent of my anger until the narrator in the video discussed what the credits for the movie said:#“AI - Human”#They... They didn't even give credit to the person who operated the fucking robot.#This STUPID LITTLE KID'S MOVIE DID NOT EVEN GIVE CREDIT TO THE GUY WHO GENERATED THE BACKGROUNDS IN THE FIRST PLACE#THEY JUST USED THE WORD “Human” INSTEAD OF GIVING EVEN AN OUNCE OF CREDIT TO THE VERY REAL HUMAN BEING THAT TOOK-#-TIME OUT OF THEIR BEAUTIFUL DAY TO GENERATE THEIR STUPID FUCKING BACKGROUNDS.#So yeah that's how I learned how to hate AI art your welcome and thank you.#I'm not sorry for all those tags#blog/ask stuff
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i do not pity israel. never have, and never will.
each night that gaza experiences is deadlier than the last, as idf soldiers record propaganda tiktoks, make rave parties and grwms and fit checks, gloat over having food and water, and film themselves deriving sadistic pleasure from torturing their hostages and victims and desecrating the dead.
Palestinians have to display their martyred before the camera for you to believe the atrocities that the zionist entity has subjected them to. they cannot even mourn in private. the apartheid entity murders them in cold blood, and you deliver the killing blow by doubting them.
babies whose families have been killed will never get to know their own name.
i can't reshare a tenth of the videos and photos that cross my timeline. i have seen more dead children in the past month than i have known death my entire life.
israeli settlers burn olive trees, bomb bakeries and fishing boats, shower white phosphorus and earthquake bombs on the captive civilians of gaza. you already know about the disastrous effects of white phosphorus, but earthquake bombs were last used during ww2 to wipe out entire cities.
how holy is the land that seeks to be built over the mass graves of thousands of children? is it holier than the miracle of a child being born in this hypocritical world?
all 11 universities in gaza have been bombed. academics should be agitating right now, especially those who call themselves "decolonial thinkers." destruction of universities is a sinisterly deliberate act to sabotage the Palestinians who will survive this great catastrophe.
the act of cleansing your hands before prayer is extremely important to muslims. no part of us can remotely comprehend the grief of the mother who refused to wash her hands from the blood of her children after losing them in a zionist airstrike over gaza. "I swear I won't wash them, I won't wash my hands, how else am I supposed to sleep near my kids."
it is only both moral and right when one side defends itself. the other side are the price of war, no better than insects and cattle and sheep left to die within the four walls of the slaughterhouse.
this situation should not be up for debate, but let me finish with one final thing : do your research about Palestine. HOWEVER. you do not need a degree in middle east studies to object to an ongoing genocide. if someone outwits you in a debate about historical details and every nuance of a subject, you were and will remain entirely correct in objecting to a genocide.
may those martyred rest in peace and be reunited again with their loved ones in heaven's eternal vastness.
DO NOT STOP TALKING ABOUT PALESTINE.
glory to Palestinian resistance. from the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.
#free palestine#palestine#gaza#free gaza#gaza under attack#gaza genocide#genocide#decolonisation#gaza strip#from the river to the sea palestine will be free
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When Things Turn Green Again
SYNOPSIS: Hoping to mend the pain of your broken heart and bury the memory of your failed marriage, you turn towards the woods. A cabin was left in your name and it’s the exact distraction you were looking for. What you didn’t anticipate is meeting a quiet, ruggedly handsome man along the way who helps you heal.
PAIRING: Logan x fem!reader
WC: 11k
WARNINGS: smut 18+; mdni; angst; mentions of cheating/divorce; emotional trauma; fluff; sexual innuendos; brief mentions of drinking; dirty talk; slight dom!Logan; oral (f receiving); fingering; doggy style; cock warming; sex with feelings; unprotected p in v
A/N: I pictured either Origins!Logan or Wolverine!Logan, but I think you can envision any Logan you’d prefer. And again thanks to @joelsgoldrush for the support through writing this ❤️ I really do love this piece I wrote and I hope you do too. Feedback is always welcome and appreciated! And thank you to everyone who has read, commented, liked and reblogged both Soft Edges and Til The Sun Turns Black—I never imagined either of those stories reaching over 1k notes.
The gravel crunches under your tires as you roll down the long driveway. Memories bloom deep in your chest as you near the cabin, of times simpler than this, unburdened by trappings of real life. You spent your formative years out here in the woods with your grandfather. Summers spent learning how to fish on the lake; how to recognize the poisonous berries from the nonpoisonous ones; and making fires, roasting marshmallows long after the sun had gone down.
Your grandfather had helped build this cabin. He’d always preferred the outdoors and solitude from people—with the obvious exception of your grandmother and mother—and he’d often come here to escape. Especially after he lost them both.
The cabin comes into view through the trees just starting to unfurl their spring foliage. Patches of snow still dot the landscape but the wet brown of winter is losing to spring’s verdant hues. The structure has seen better days, last having been lived in over ten years ago.
A stab of regret pierces your chest. The cabin was willed to you when your grandfather died, but this was your first trip up here since the funeral. You planned to, of course, but as the old saying goes, life happened. Now, you’re hoping the old place can give you something to sink your energy into besides thinking about your failed marriage.
You park the truck and step out, surveying the property. The shrubs and flower beds are overgrown and choked with old growth and weeds. Years worth of leaves rest upon the roof and clog the gutters. The front porch has several loose or missing spindles and you’re almost afraid to step up onto the old boards. Proving yourself right, the wood groans and creaks beneath your feet, certain spots threatening to give way.
“That’s going to be a fun project,” you mutter to yourself.
Opening the front door, you’re met with the damp mustiness of a long closed up space. A layer of dust seems to coat nearly every surface and cobwebs linger in the corners. You’re hoping the repairs needed inside the cabin are more cosmetic than costly.
You open up the old blinds, letting the early morning light filter in the room. It’s not a large space, an open kitchen, living room and dinning area with separate bedroom and attached bathroom. A small set of steps leads up to a loft, which also doubles as a sleeping space or bonus area.
You unload your belongings from the truck, tucking them away inside the bedroom, before opening all the windows to let in the fresh air. Thankfully, the glass and protective screens are in relatively good repair—a few need replacing, but an easy enough job. You feel a sense of purpose flourish within you, something you haven’t felt for months and you wonder if this is just the reprieve you need to find yourself again.
+++
You spend the morning taking inventory of the repairs needed around the cabin to make it immediately livable. Jotting down a list of supplies, you hop in your truck and head into town to hit up the hardware store.
The owner, George, recognizes you from previous trips with your grandfather when you were younger. He greets you warmly and helps you find everything you need. As you’re checking out, he asks, “Run into Logan yet?”
“Logan?”
He nods his head. “Shares a property line with you. Has a cabin of his own just about a quarter mile north of yours. Asked him to keep his eye out on the place.”
“Oh, well, that was nice of him,” you comment, stuffing your receipt in your purse.
George shrugs. “Figured it would give him something different to do. Doesn’t interact much with people.”
“Guess I’ll just have to introduce myself then,” you say, lifting your bags up off the checkout counter.
“Good luck with that,” George responds with a huffed laugh. “He’s not one for small talk.”
You give George a polite smile and leave the store, bags in hand. But the conversation sparks your curiosity and you find yourself thinking of the man who shares the woods with you. You promised yourself once you were settled, you’d make the short hike towards his place and introduce yourself.
Arriving back at the cabin, you park the truck and hop out, stopping short when you spot a lone figure walking around from the back of your property. You can’t stop the prickle of anxiety that zips up your spine as the figure comes closer, but he doesn’t see you yet, his eyes on the ground as he walks.
You shut the truck door with more force than necessary, the sound echoing off the trees. He looks up then and you suck in a short breath as his rugged features come into view—well trimmed but scruffy beard, wild dark hair and a fit muscular frame you can see even under the flannel of his shirt.
Butterflies flutter in your stomach and you can’t remember the last time you’ve felt like this. You can feel a blush creep across your face and you grip the bags in your hands tighter just to feel something other than the hammering of your heart in your chest.
He stops short of where you’re standing and jerks a thumb behind him. “Turned your electrical breaker on,” he says without introduction and you can only stare at him.
“Oh,” you say dumbly. “I, uh—thanks.”
He tilts his head and looks at you and you feel like you’re on fire under his glare. It’s an inquisitive one, like he can’t quite figure out what you’re doing in a place like this and you shift uncomfortably under his gaze. And yet, you don’t want him to stop looking at you.
“Right,” he says, reaching into the pocket of his jeans for something. He fishes out a key and holds it in your direction. “This is yours.”
You shift the bags, so you’re holding them all in one hand and reach for the key. Your fingertips brush against his just briefly, but it’s enough to set sparks along your skin and you can feel the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end. As he steps back from you, you blurt out your name and then immediately wish for a swift death at your awkwardness.
God, this was embarrassing.
It’s like you’ve never interacted with humans before.
He gives the barest hint of a smile. “Logan.”
“Nice to meet you, Logan,” you say, just so you can taste his name in your mouth.
Logan nods and turns to head down the path that leads away from your cabin and deeper into the woods. You watch him go, his figure fading further into the distance and you can’t help but think, I’m in trouble.
+++
You spend the rest of the day keeping busy around the cabin—wiping down dusty surfaces, sweeping up cobwebs, replacing broken light bulbs—but your mind never strays far from Logan and the inexplicable pull you have towards him.
You’ve dated. You were married. You weren’t a stranger to the opposite sex and physical attraction, but this felt like more. Like an unavoidable pull between you and him and you’ve just been spun into his orbit.
And that attraction terrifies you.
Over the next few days, you try and shove him from your mind. It helps that you haven’t seen him again, but your eyes inevitably dart towards the path leading away from your cabin as if you’re expecting him to come walking through.
Then, the idea comes to you late one night as you’re sitting in front of the fire, watching the flames lick higher. No matter how hard you had tried, Logan remained firmly planted in your mind, his roots stubborn and unyielding.
Your grandfather always said your grandmother’s cooking was always something that warmed his heart.
But as you walk the small path towards Logan’s property you briefly wonder if you’ve lost your mind. You carry the small pie dish in your hands and as his cabin grows closer you’re actually contemplating turning back and forgetting the whole thing.
Who the hell bakes pies for people any more?
His cabin is smaller than yours, a little more rustic and worn, which seems fitting based on the little you know about him. Several piles of firewood line the roofed porch and at the opposite end, a single chair and table sit in front of the window. With one last shaky inhale, you climb the steps and rap your knuckles against the door. From inside you hear heavy footfalls and then the door opens.
Logan looks down at you and then towards the dish in your hands, an odd expression crossing his handsome features.
“I made you a pie,” you blurt unceremoniously and you instantly wish for the ground to open up and swallow you whole.
Logan just continues to stare at you and you think you see the slightest twitch at the corner of his mouth. But maybe not.
“I, uh, my grandfather lived in the cabin next to yours and it’s mine now. I’m fixing it up, because…well, just because and he taught me to pick berries as a kid? So, I did that and I made you this,” you finish in a ramble, flames of embarrassment licking across your skin.
Jesus fucking Christ.
His eyes flick down at the dish in your hands again and you hold it up a bit higher, nudging it closer towards him. As he reaches out to take it, his fingers brush against yours and you again feel electricity tingle down your fingertips. If he notices it too, he says nothing, not that he’s said anything since you showed up on his porch.
Logan tucks the dish closer to his body and gives you a slight nod. You take that as a good sign and step back to leave. “Okay, cool, cool. Well, um, enjoy. I made sure all he berries were the edible ones so you don’t end up throwing up everywhere.”
At that he actually huffs a chuckle. “Good to know,” he finally says, his voice warm and rich and just a bit gruff.
“Right, well, enjoy!” You turn to leave and can feel his stare against your back and it takes all your remaining functioning brain cells to walk normally.
You spend the next few days trying to forget all about your ill-fated attempt to play neighbor, figuring if he didn’t want to know you before, he definitely didn’t after that.
You’re coming back from a hike when you spot Logan through the trees walking away from your place, hands tucked deep within his pockets. Your heart quickens in your chest as you walk up to the front door and find the baking dish sitting on the old welcome mat. It’s freshly washed with a folded up piece of paper sitting inside—Thank you.
You’re certain your smile could rival the light from the sun.
+++
It becomes a routine over the next few weeks—you bringing him food and him returning the dish, all without exchanging any words. You’re thankful he’s not much of a talker because you can’t seem to stop making a fool of yourself around him.
And you don’t know why.
He’s a handsome man, that anyone can see, but you’ve never been so flustered around a beautiful man before.
There’s something else about Logan you can’t pinpoint that sets your heart fluttering behind your ribs. He seems lonely in the same way you are, and you wonder if he’s out here to lick and heal old wounds just like you. You have an inexplicable want to help him, even if that means sharing your food leftovers with him and trying to chip away at the wall that surrounds him.
A part of you is hoping he can help break down your walls, too.
You’re waist deep under the kitchen sink when a knock on the door drags you from fixing the leaking drain.
“Ah, fuck,” you curse, trying to maneuver out of the space while also not spilling the stagnant water left in the sink trap. As you set the old drain down you call out, “Just a second!”
You wipe your hands against your thighs and swing the door open to find Logan standing there, your glass baking dish from yesterday in his hands. For a second you blink silently at him, unable to think of anything but the fact that you’re wearing grease stained overalls and probably smell like a swamp.
“Logan, hi,” you finally say, brushing your hair out of your face.
He gives you a strange look as he hands the dish back to you. You open your mouth to speak when he interrupts you, “Why do you feed me?”
His question hangs in the air and you freeze. Of all the things he could have asked, you weren’t sure why you didn’t expect that one. His voice is a little gruff, but underneath there’s something that makes your heart race. Something vulnerable.
You swallow and grip the edge of the glass dish. Logan stares at you, his gaze intense, and you feel exposed. Like he’s trying to dissect you with just a look.
“Oh, well, I don’t know,” you finally admit. “You just…seem like you could use some kindness.”
He raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t say anything else. The silence stretches between you, heavy and charged, and you can feel your pulse quicken. “I can stop if—if you want.”
“No,” he says, his voice rough, but with an undercurrent of tenderness. “No, you don’t have to stop. Just not used to people doin’ things like that for me.”
His admission catches you off guard being the first real piece of personal information he’s shared with you. You’ve gleaned certain things from George—he’s told you about Logan being a mutant and a few pieces of his past—but you know there’s still a world of history hiding behind his loner facade that he keeps hidden. You’re hoping eventually he lets you take a peak inside.
“Everyone deserves kindness, Logan,” you say.
His gaze flickers, a shadow of something crossing his features that makes your heart ache. He shifts on his feet and stares down at the dish in your hands. “I’m not so sure of that,” he replies.
“Well, I am.”
Logan’s eyes drag back up to yours and you try to calm the nervous energy that bubbles under your skin as his stare presses into you. He gives you a small nod then before turning to leave.
He pauses as he hits your driveway and looks back at you, cursing lowly to himself. Scratching at the back of his head, he walks back up the steps and pulls something out of the pocket of his jacket. “I, uh, here,” he says uncertainly as he hands you the small cloth bag.
You can only stare as you take the bag from him, the gift surprisingly light in your hand, but the gesture heavy with unspoken emotion. Your mind races as you think of what could be inside and your heart hammers loudly in your chest.
Logan stands there, eyes not quite meeting yours as he waits for you to open it. Your fingers tremble slightly as you undo the drawstrings and peer inside, finding a mixture of different seeds. You can’t help but trail your fingers through them, feeling the faint warmth they hold from where they were nestled against Logan’s body.
“Oh, Logan,” you murmur, your voice thick with emotion.
You glance up at him and he’s looking at you, scratching at his beard, the faintest hint of blush staining his cheeks. “They’re wildflowers. Don’t know what kind. But, I dunno. I thought you could use them for your garden.”
Your chest tightens as you pull the strings close and tuck the bag in your pocket. “I love them, Logan,” you say, offering him a smile. “Thank you.”
For a moment, you see the tension in his shoulders relax just a bit as he exhales. “Just seemed like something you’d appreciate,” he mumbles, more to himself than to you.
Something has shifted between you and you find yourself itching to touch him, but you don’t. Not yet. The thread holding you two together is there, but thin, and you don’t want it to fray. “I really do appreciate it,” you say softly, stepping just the tiniest bit closer.
Logan nods and his mouth tugs into something that’s not quite a smile, but close. He looks at you for a long moment, the weight of his gaze pressing into you. “Okay. Good.” Shoving his hands in his pockets, he turns and jogs down the steps.
“Guess I’ll see you around then,” you call after him, a smile spreading across your face.
He glances back over his shoulder. “Yeah. I guess you will.”
And maybe, just maybe, the walls around him are beginning to crumble.
+++
Sweat beads across your brow as you work, but you pay it no heed. Your attention keeps slipping to Logan as you pry another nail loose from the rotted board. You’ve fallen into an odd relationship with the elusive man whose property line you share, yet you still barely know anything about him.
It’s been a week since he stopped by and gave you those wildflower seeds. A warmth still spreads in your chest when you think about it. And true to his promise, you do see him around, albeit not as much as you’d like. He seems wary, as if his gift opened up a part of himself he wasn’t ready for you to see.
But at least he doesn’t drop off your clean dishes and run anymore.
As you pry the last nail free, the rotten board comes free and you toss it down onto the grass along with the others. Thankfully, the porch isn’t terribly large and you figure another hour or so to remove the remaining boards before you can start laying down fresh lumber.
The crunch of gravel pulls you from your work and you look up to find Logan walking down the path, a large leather bag in his hand. You look up at him, wiping the sweat off your brow and lean back onto your heels, trying your best not to stare at his forearms.
“Oh, hey, Logan,” you say, wiping your hands against your jeans as you stand. “What brings you to my side of the woods?”
He actually smiles at you and nods towards the porch. “Need help?”
You hate the little flutter you feel pressing against your ribs. “I couldn’t ask you to do that.”
“Well, it’s good thing you’re not asking. I’m offering.”
You blink, caught off guard by his directness. “Oh, well, if you insist,” you say, trying to calm your nerves. “It would be nice to have a second set of hands.”
He sets the leather bag down on the porch with a thud and you catch a glimpse of the tools nestled inside. Logan notices you looking and comments, “I know a few things.” His smirk makes your legs feel like jello.
“Oh, I bet you know a lot of things,” you blurt, and your eyes widen at the double entendre of your words, heat flushing across your face.
Logan laughs, a real laugh, his eyes crinkling. “Well, it’s always good to be well educated,” he says with a wink.
Fuck, you feel like you’re going to spontaneously combust.
Shoving down your raging embarrassment, you lay out your plan to fix the porch and Logan gives a small nod. He starts at the opposite end, prying loose the first board with ease. You try not to stare at the way his muscles move and how his skin begins to slick with the first beads of sweat. You work in silence for a while, the only sounds those of the forest around you.
“So, what actually brought you out here?” Logan finally asks.
You glance over at him and watch as he tosses another board onto the grass. He looks at you expectantly and you sigh. “I got divorced,” you answer honestly. “And I needed something pour my energy into other than wondering where the fuck I went wrong.”
You can’t bring yourself to look at him, your openness leaving you feeling raw, and instead focus on the board in front of you. Anger begins to simmer in your veins at the thought of the last couple of years and you grab the next plank with just enough force to wedge a splinter deep into your palm. A loud curse falls from your lips as you drop the board.
You feel Logan next to you and you suck in a deep breath as he reaches for your hand, his fingers curling around yours. “Lemme see,” he says, pulling you close and you can smell the earthiness of him, like damp soil and campfire smoke. You find yourself staring at him, his proximity intoxicating, as you drink in his long lashes and the slope of his nose.
He tilts your palm towards himself, his fingers pressing gently yet with firm enough pressure to push the splinter out of your skin. Pulling it out the rest of the way, his eyes flick up to yours. “Somehow I don’t think you’re the one that fucked up, sweetheart.” His voice is warm and you want to melt into him.
“Well,” you start, clearing your throat, “I certainly wasn’t fucking his mistresses.”
Something in his eyes darkens and a shiver runs down your spine. “He’s a fool for losin’ you,” he growls, and his words hit you with more force than you’d care to admit.
His hand still lingers on yours, steady and reassuring and warm and for a moment you think he might lean closer. You desperately want him to. To press his mouth against yours, to feel his breath against your skin, to have his taste against your tongue. But he pulls back, his expression one of thin control, but you can see the storm behind his gaze.
“A damn fool,” he mutters under his breath and you can’t help but wonder if he’s talking about himself or your ex.
Logan lets your hand go, turning back towards the porch and you mourn the loss, your skin still tingling from the contact. You swallow hard, trying to shake off the intensity of the moment. It’s Logan—quiet, gruff Logan, who never really sticks around for a real conversation and yet here he is, offering help and showing that maybe he’s not entirely as unaffected by you as you thought.
Your heartbeat drums in your ears as you watch him go back to work, prying up the next board, his muscles flexing beneath his worn shirt. His jaw clenches and there’s a focused determination in his movements and you can’t tell if he’s working out some anger or trying to keep himself in check.
You work in silence for several more minutes, the only sounds being the prying of loose boards and creaking lumber. There’s a tension between you now, more so than there was before, something palpable.
It’s enough to drive you mad.
“What about you?” you finally ask, your voice somewhat hesitant. “You don’t talk about yourself much.”
Logan glances at you from the corner of his eye and his brow furrows, as if he’s weighing whether or not to answer. “Not much to tell,” he grunts, pulling up another board with more force than necessary.
“Somehow, I doubt that. You don’t just wake up one day alone in the woods with forearms like that.”
Logan looks over at you and smirks. “Maybe I’m just really good with my hands.” His voice dips low and you can’t help the warmth that pools low in your belly at his words.
You swallow, your throat suddenly dry. “Yeah, no…yep. I’m starting to figure that out.”
He’s silent for a few moments as he goes back to work and the air between you hums with something charged. “You really want to know?” he asks, his voice rough. “I’ve been around for too long, longer than anyone should. Done things I’m not proud of.” He tosses another plank aside and all you can do it watch him. “I’ve…I’ve hurt people I care about. People I’ve cared about have hurt me. I’m not really sure I belong anywhere, so I just…drift.”
There’s something raw in his voice, something broken and vulnerable, and it catches you off guard. For all his outward strength, there’s man deep down inside who’s lost, and your heart aches for him.
“You belong here,” you say softly.
He doesn’t look at you, but you can feel the tension shift as the weight of your words settle between you. Another board gets tossed aside. “Yeah, maybe.”
He finally raises his gaze to yours and for a moment the world quiets—the forest, the porch, all of it—as his eyes lock onto yours and his expression softens. You offer him a warm smile and then return back to the porch, hesitant to push him any further.
You work comfortably together after that. The old boards removed, Logan helps you place and nail down the new ones. Your conversation is limited to the project, but you don’t mind.
As Logan packs up his tools, you glance over at him. “Thank you.”
A half smile plays at the corner of his mouth. “You’re welcome,” comes his reply as he steps off the porch and heads down the path back towards his cabin.
“Logan!” you call, lightly jogging after him before he slips out of view. He pauses and turns back towards you. “Can I make you dinner?”
He raises an eyebrow. “Haven’t you already been doin’ that?”
“No,” you say shaking your head, “I mean, yes, I have, but like a proper dinner? Fresh from kitchen to table. I can come by you, if you’d like.”
Logan studies you for a moment, his gaze intense and you can feel your heart beating against your ribs. He’s silent for so long you wonder if you’ve overstepped and you open your mouth to speak when he says, “Alright. Come by tomorrow, six o’clock.”
You can’t stop the smile that spreads across your face. “Tomorrow it is.”
+++
You’re up before the sun, your nerves a tangle of raw edges. You lay there, staring at the ceiling and wondering what the fuck you’ve gotten yourself into.
You weren’t expecting to meet someone out here in the woods. You were hoping for tranquility, a distraction to quiet the voice in your head that kept nagging you for how your life veered off course. That maybe if you worked more, did more, loved more you wouldn’t be a thirty year old divorcee.
Instead, you find a mysterious man who sparks within you a flame you long thought extinguished. A ruggedly handsome man who’s somehow wormed his way into your life and has you wondering if maybe he can’t help mend the pieces of your broken heart.
Except you don’t know if that same spark is ignited within him and if his gesture of dinner is simple kindness. A response to the kindness you’ve shown him over the last two months or if he’s feeling that same attraction you do.
God, you hope he does.
You spend the morning cleaning, trying to pour your nervous energy into something productive other than worrying about what the evening may bring. Driving into town, you agonize over what to make even though he’s been eating what you’ve made without complaint for weeks now. You opt to keep it simple—pasta with homemade meat sauce, a nice loaf of bread and a couple bottles of wine.
While the sauce is simmering on the stove you get ready. You dress for comfort, a simple pair of leggings and a flowy top that hangs slightly off your shoulders. You catch your reflection in the mirror and give yourself a silent nod of encouragement. Despite this just being dinner, the night brims with the possibility of maybe something more.
Once the food is prepared, you carefully pack everything in a large basket and begin the walk to Logan’s cabin. The night is cool, but still holds the warmth of day and the promise of summer to come. You feel your anticipation heighten the closer you get to his place and your stomach drops when you see it appear up ahead.
It’s just Logan, you remind yourself.
Stepping up onto his porch, you give a hesitant knock at the door. He greets you almost instantly and you suck in a deep breath. Logan looks good and your heart does a flip as you take him in—well fitting jeans, a clean white shirt underneath a soft red flannel button down, his hair is still slightly damp from a shower.
“You’re early,” he comments, standing aside to let you in. You catch the slight frown tug at his mouth as he notices the basket. “You coulda cooked here, you know.”
“Oh, well, I didn’t know if you’d want me invading your space,” you reply, following him deeper into the cabin and setting the basket down on the counter.
Logan turns back towards you, bracing his hands against the counter. “I don’t mind you in my space.”
His words hang in the air between you and you can feel your pulse quicken. You glance up at him, and the way he’s looking at you—steady and unflinching—sends a thrill down your spine.
You clear your throat, trying to settle the nerves in your chest. “Next time then,” you say lightly, hoping he can’t hear the slight waver in your voice.
Logan’s lips quirk into a half smile. “Next time,” he agrees.
He reaches into a cabinet above him, pulling down a couple of plates and glasses, setting a small table in the corner of the small kitchen. You keep yourself busy unpacking the food, arranging the bread, pasta and sauce on the table, working around him as he uncorks the wine and pours both of you a glass.
Logan joins you then, raising his glass and clinking it gently against yours. He nods in a silent cheers and tips his head back as he drinks, his eyes never leaving yours. You can’t suppress the shiver that shoots down your spine.
Setting down his glass, he serves you and then himself, commenting, “This smells amazing.”
“Family recipe,” you reply, taking another sip wine. “Remind me to make it for you when I have fresh tomatoes. It’s even better then.”
“I’ll have to do that,” he says with a smile.
Conversation starts off slow, but not awkward, as you both test the limits of what you’re wiling to share. Logan’s answers are often short, reserved, but what he does reveal helps bring into focus the outline of the man before you. An outline you’re hoping he’ll let you fill in.
“George says you’re a mutant,” you start slowly and you don’t miss the way his posture stiffens, his fork scraping harshly against the plate.
He goes still and you wonder if you fucked up. Crossed a boundary he wasn’t willing to cross.
Eventually, Logan’s eyes flick up to yours and he lets out a small hum. “He did, did he?”
You nod, chewing. “It doesn’t bother me.”
He’s quiet for a beat. “It bothers most people.”
“I’m not most people,” you reply, your voice soft.
Something in his face softens then, the furrow of his brow a little less pronounced. A slight smile plays at his lips. “No. No you’re not.”
You feel a warmth bloom in your chest and your face flushes. Taking another bite, you ask, “Can I see?”
Logan studies you for a moment and you can see him deciding whether or not to show you that part of him he’d rather keep hidden. He sets the silverware down and he flexes his fingers before resting his palms back on the table. Then, he unsheathes his claws and you can’t stop the gasp that falls from your lips.
You see him flinch at your reaction and he goes to retract his claws and you reach for him. “Don’t,” you say, your fingers hovering just above the blades.
As he relaxes, you gently rest your fingertips against the metal, finding it surprisingly cool but still holding a faint warmth from his body. His eyes drop to where you’re touching him as you slowly begin to trace each blade with your fingers, following the slight curve down to where they emerge from his skin. You look up at him, finding his gaze fixed on you and you shiver under the intensity.
“They’re beautiful,” you whisper. You feel him shudder beneath you as he retracts his claws, leaving your fingertips nestled against the skin between his knuckles.
You pull your hand away from his, mourning the loss of his skin against yours. Logan clears his throat and pulls his hands into his lap, glancing down at them as if they’re foreign, something he’s never taken the time to notice before. He flexes his fingers once more before dragging his gaze back to your face.
“Do they hurt?” you ask quietly.
He shakes his head. “No. Not anymore.”
“Thank you,” you say quietly. “Thank you for showing me.”
Logan studies you for a long moment, searching your face like he’s trying to figure you out. You know he’s probably not used to this, someone seeing him as something other than a mutant, an aberration, someone who should be hidden away. Then, his face softens.
“People don’t usually ask,” he says quietly.
You smile gently, feeling that flame inside you burn just a bit brighter. “I just want to know you.”
He leans back in his chair, his gaze still steady, but more open, as if some of those invisible walls he surrounds himself with have started to come down. If only just enough to let the light shine through.
An unspoken tension simmers, thickening the air, and you know he can feel it too, but it’s not uncomfortable. It’s heavy with promise. You turn your attention back to your plate and for a few moments, neither of you speak.
“So,” you say after a beat, “Do you ever use them as forks?”
Logan huffs out a laugh, the sound surprising you and his eyes crinkle in genuine amusement. “I can’t say that I have,” he replies with a smile.
You grin. “You should give it a try.”
“If I do, you’ll be the first to know.”
The rest of dinner passes with easy conversation and you feel your nerves begin to settle, just a bit. Logan seems less guarded too, more at ease than you’ve ever seen him.
You help him clear the table, ignoring his request that you just sit and relax. As you stand next to him, emptying the leftovers into a container, you feel his eyes on you. When you hand him the container, your fingers brush again, but this time he doesn’t immediately pull away. His fingers linger just a bit longer than necessary and your breath catches in your throat.
“Thanks for dinner, he says quietly, voice low. “And for…understanding.”
You nod, feeling that unmistakable pull between you, the tug that’s kept you orbiting closer and closer to him. “Anytime, Logan,” you answer softly. “You don’t have to hide from me.”
There’s a flicker of hesitation in his eyes, like he’s been burned before and is still figuring out if he can trust what you’re offering him. And you understand his turmoil, trust having shattered your heart into pieces, pieces you’re still trying to pick up and reshape.
Logan steps a little bit closer then and before you can say anything else, his hand gently reaches out and tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. The gesture is simple but intimate and it sends a shiver down your spine, heat pooling lowly in your belly.
“C’mon,” he says. “Let me walk you home.”
He grabs your basket before you can protest and you follow him out into the night. There’s a full moon hanging heavy in the sky, illuminating the path in front of you, yet you remain close to Logan. You curse to yourself as you trip over an exposed root and then you feel Logan reach out for you, his fingers wrapping securely around your own. The heat of his palm against yours is almost overwhelming.
Your cabin comes into view and Logan slows, his fingers slipping from your grasp as he sets the basket down on the porch.
“Good night, Logan,” you say softly as you walk up the steps.
As you turn from him, he reaches for your wrist, his fingers curling and pressing hotly against your skin. Your breath hitches as he climbs the steps to join you on the porch, and your gasps dies in your throat as he tilts your chin up and forces you to meet his gaze.
“Do I make you nervous?” His voice is low, breath hot and damp against your skin.
“Yes,” you breathe, somehow inching closer to him, your fingers reaching for the hem of his flannel and twisting into the fabric.
“Why?” He brushes his nose against yours and you chase after the touch.
Swallowing hard, you look up at him from under your lashes. You tilt further into him, your mouth hovering just over his. “Because I haven’t felt like this in a very long time and I don’t want it to go away.” Don’t want you to go away.
Logan nods and whispers, “I’m not goin’ anywhere.” And then he presses his mouth to yours.
It’s soft, barely a hint of skin against skin, but when you whisper, “Please,” against his lips, Logan growls and then he’s everywhere. His kiss claims you, his tongue licking in your mouth and you whimper as his fingers curl along the nape of your neck somehow pulling you impossibly closer.
You wind your arms around his shoulders, your fingers tangling in the short strands at the back of his head. Your entire world is focused down to the feel of his lips on yours and the press of his fingers against your jaw as he pulls you towards his hungry mouth.
Logan’s grip on you tightens, one hand splayed across your lower back and the other pressed firmly between your shoulder blades, anchoring you to him. The heat between you is palpable, each movement of his lips setting you further aflame. You lose track of time, lost in the sensation of his beard scraping against your skin, leaving a tingling trail in its wake.
When he finally pulls back, you’re both breathless and his forehead rests against yours, your shared breaths mingling in the space between you. His eyes are dark and intense as they search your face and you feel untethered, Logan being the only thing keeping you grounded.
“You okay?” he asks, voice rough, but surprisingly tender as his thumb traces along the line of your jaw.
You nod, swallowing the lump that’s formed in your throat. You don’t trust yourself to speak.
His lips quirk into a small smile. “Good.” He brushes a stray strand of hair away from your cheek, his hand lingering at the side of your face. He presses one last soft kiss to the corner of your mouth before he steps back and walks down the path back home.
+++
You can’t stop thinking about the kiss—Logan’s lips against yours, the taste of his tongue, the press of his hands against your skin, hot and heavy, yet gentle.
You want to live in that moment forever. Want to know only his kisses for the rest of your life, for him to be the first person you kiss good morning and the last person you kiss goodnight. For him to kiss you just because he can, because he misses you, because he can’t get the feel of your mouth out of his mind and he needs to feel you again pressing against him.
You also want to run away, hide yourself from these emotions that are overwhelming you and leaving you feeling raw and exposed and absolutely terrified. You haven’t kissed another man in two years and he broke your heart, leaving nothing but shattered pieces and dust in his wake. Dust that still clings to you despite your best efforts to sweep it up. Those pieces of your heart are still sharp, jagged where they should be smooth.
You’ve always been trusting, choosing to see the light in others as opposed the darkness. Believing deep down that everyone deserves kindness, deserves a second chance, that one bad deed does not a bad person make. But he stole a part of that from you and you hate him for it. Hate that even now, after all this time, he’s able to worm his way into your brain and make you question the motives of the man who’s made you feel more alive than you have in months.
Last night you felt unshackled, unbound by the fear that had chained you for so long. You felt as if Logan’s very touch, his presence, had set your soul on fire and instead of fearing the burn, you were ready to embrace the warmth.
But now, raw contempt begins to simmer in your veins and you need something to pour your frustration into before it threatens to consume you whole.
Throwing your hair up into a messy bun and throwing on a paint-stained shirt and ripped jeans, you head outside looking for a project to sink fingers into. In the small shed behind the cabin, you find a few gardening supplies—a small shovel, trowel, bow rake—and you drag them out and to the overgrown flower beds.
You don’t even bother with the tools at first, ripping at the dead growth with your bare hands, pulling it from the earth in great clumps and tossing it aside. Your pulse beats loudly in your ears as you move from bed to bed, clawing away the old growth, your breathing growing ragged and your palms staining with dirt.
Grabbing the rake, you dig at the remaining plants, tearing at the roots, destroying the new growth. Tears run hotly down your face, blurring your vision and your throat aches from force of your breathing and screams you’ve been holding back.
From behind you, you hear the sound of your name and you whip around so quickly, the rake goes flying from your hands. You can hear the snikt of Logan’s claws as they unsheathe and the splintering of wood as he deflects the rake flying at him. It clatters to the ground between you as he retracts his claws and looks at you, his brow furrowed in concern.
You wonder, then, exactly what you look like in that moment. Dirt caked on your hands and under your fingernails, cheeks flushed with exertion, hair a halo of disarray. The pure adrenaline you’d been running on wanes and your limbs suddenly feel heavy and you sink to the ground in front of him. You can’t bring yourself to look at him, because you’re afraid of what you’ll see.
Logan approaches you slowly, kneeling down in front of you and gently raising your chin to look up at him. The stark worry etched on his face makes you ache and fresh tears burn in your eyes. You wipe at your eyes, which only serves to smear dirt across your face.
“I’m terrified, Logan,” you whisper, wanting to reach for him, but afraid to touch him. “I terrified of how much I like you.”
“You scare me too,” he confesses softly and your heart breaks.
He leans closer, fingers resting hesitantly against your knees. You reach for him too, grabbing on to the open sides of his jacket and pulling him to you. Logan doesn’t flinch, doesn’t push back and instead envelopes you into his arms, your head resting against the solid warmth of his chest.
Safe in his arms, you cry. Harsh, broken sobs as he rubs your back, the soft caress of his fingers along your spine anchoring you to him as he holds you. He murmurs into your hair that he’s got you, to let it all out, and you do.
Eventually, you calm and sigh, pressing your forehead against his chest, loathe to move just yet. “I’m broken, Logan,” you mumble into his shirt. You look up at him then, the softness and concern on his face making you physically ache. “I still have broken pieces where I should be whole.”
Slowly, tentatively, he brings his hands up to your face, cupping your cheeks in his hands. His thumbs brush at the dirt and tears under your eyes and he smoothes the hair away from your forehead. “Maybe some of my pieces fit,” he says, voice low, but steady.
His words send a flood of emotion through you, and for a moment, all you can do is stare at him. Then the gravity of what he’s saying hits you—he’s offering you himself, all his jagged and scarred pieces, the pieces no one else sees.
The pieces he wants you to see.
You lean forward, pressing the lightest of kisses against the corner of his mouth. His sigh is hot against your cheek, but he doesn’t press further.
“Thank you,” you whisper into his skin and somehow it feels like the most important thing you’ve ever said.
“C’mon,” he says, “Let me help you get this cleaned up.”
You nod, wiping your nose with the back of your hand. Logan stands, offering you his hand. You take it, your fingers slipping into his and his grip is steady, yet gentle as he helps you up.
Without a word, Logan grabs the broken rake and begins removing the debris from the beds you laid waste to. You watch him work for a moment before joining in, pulling the weeds from the beds you hadn’t gotten to yet. Every now and then your eyes meet, but you don’t say anything. You don’t feel the need to fill the space with words, his presence beside you speaking volumes more than he could ever say.
After a while, Logan pauses and looks over at you, wiping the dirt from his hands into his jeans. “You still got those seeds I gave you?”
“Of course I do.”
“Go get ‘em,” he says nodding towards the cabin. “We’ll plant something new.”
You retrieve the small pouch where you’ve kept it safe and come out to find Logan kneeling in the dirt, his fingers making small pockets of earth to house the new flowers. He looks up at you, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. You join him on the ground, dropping a few seeds in each well as he moves to create the next one.
“I’m not very good at this,” Logan starts, covering the last well with dirt, “but I promise I won’t break you. You don’t gotta be scared of me.”
He looks at you then, his hazel eyes meeting yours and you reach for his hand, your thumb brushing across his dirt stained knuckles.
“No,” you reply with a smile, “I don’t think I do.”
+++
It’s been three days since that moment with Logan in the garden and the air between you has been quiet. Logan hasn’t come by the cabin, but you hadn’t sought him out either. You weren’t avoiding him, exactly. More a need for space, a chance to process the feelings you felt for him, to test if you were truly ready to open yourself up to him.
Your mind never strays far from him, though. An almost constant loop plays in your brain of the way he held you, the way he spoke, the quiet promise he made not to break you. There’s a large part of you that believes him; your heart is screaming at you shed your lingering doubt and trust him, but your rational brain is grasping desperately to the kernel of truth that vows can be broken.
So you turn to what you do best—pour your energy into other things. The cabin is spotless now, cleaned of disuse and age, turned into a cozy place of retreat, a simple shelter turned into a home. And yet…
You’re sitting on the porch, watching the sun dip lower in the sky, the book you’d been trying to read long forgotten. The forest is peaceful, alive with the sounds of early summer. But as calming as it is, you can’t ignore the ache in your chest—you miss him. More than you thought possible.
Just as you’re about to stand, the sound of boots against gravel catches your attention. You look up and there he is—Logan. His hands are shoved deep into the pockets of his worn jacket as he walks up the path. His look is cautious, as if he’s unsure whether or not you’ll accept his presence.
Your heart skips a beat and you stand, wiping your palms against your jeans as he draws closer. His hazel eyes meet yours and there’s something softer about him, something open.
He stops a few feet away from you, gaze steady. “I wasn’t sure if I should come by.” His voice is still gruff, but quieter than usual. “If you needed space or not.”
“I did, need space. But not from you,” you clarify. You take a hesitant step towards him. “I missed you.”
Logan sighs then, his posture relaxing just slightly. “I wanted so badly to see you. I didn’t know if I should stay away.”
Before you can second guess yourself, you step down from the porch, closing the distance between you. You stand in front of him, noticing the faint lines of tension around his mouth, the way his jaw is clenched as if bracing himself for your rejection.
“Don’t stay away,” you say softly, “I want you here.”
You reach for him, your fingers brushing against his hands as you pull them from his pockets. Logan doesn’t pull away and the warmth of his skin against yours feels like the most natural thing in the world. You feel it then, that familiar pull—the one that’s been there since the beginning, drawing you closer and closer into his orbit, his sun.
You brush your thumbs across his knuckles and look up at him. “You wanna come inside?” you ask, your voice barely above a whisper. “I’ll make you something to eat?”
Logan nods, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “Yeah. Yeah, I’d like that.”
As you lead him inside, something in the air between you shifts, something subtle. But you know one thing for certain—you’re not afraid anymore. Not of this.
+++
The sun has set, the food long gone and as Logan’s hand reaches for the front door, you slip in front of him. His scent overwhelms you, that earthy dampness you’ve come to associate with him flooding your senses.
“What if you stayed?” you ask, the slight waver in your voice betraying your boldness.
You watch as his eyes darken and he leans even further into your space. “Do you know what you’re asking, sweetheart?” he replies, eyes searching your face.
Swallowing, you nod. “I do,” you whisper.
Then you slide your arms around his waist, pulling him closer as you lean in and kiss the hollow of his throat. You can feel him swallow hard beneath your lips and you smirk into his skin as you drag your mouth higher, over the long column of his neck to nip at the corner of his jaw.
“Stay,” you murmur in his ear.
Logan turns, his nose brushing against your cheek as he seeks your mouth and you inhale deeply as his lips find yours. His fingers wind themselves into your hair, resting against the nape of your neck as he pulls you closer. You whimper into his mouth when he pulls back, eyes blown black.
“Show me where,” he says, his voice low.
You lead him up the stairs, his hand warm in yours and you barely make it to the top before Logan’s spinning you around, mouth finding yours. His is kiss is demanding, so different from that first one all those nights ago. This is urgent and desperate, like he can’t possibly get you close enough to satisfy the need deep within him. And you feel it too, pouring yourself back equally into the kiss, moaning as his tongue finally slips alongside yours.
Your fingers fumble along the top of his jeans, pulling his shirt from where it’s tucked and sliding your hands up along the sides of his ribs. He rewards you with a deep groan of his own, nipping slightly at your bottom lip.
“Christ, sweetheart,” he rumbles against your lips, kissing you once, twice, “I’ve been dyin’ to feel your hands on me.”
“Me, too,” you reply, gasping as his hands find the hem of your shirt, lifting it just enough to brush his fingers hotly along your skin.
Logan pulls back just enough to look down at your face, his fingers still clutching the fabric of your shirt, but lifting it just a bit higher. His gaze is questioning, asking for silent permission to continue. You nod once and he slowly drags the shirt up, his fingers skimming along your sides, over the swells of your breasts as he pulls the shirt over your head.
Despite the heat coursing through your veins, you shiver under the intensity of his stare. He kisses you again, inhaling deeply, before moving down, nipping over your chin, your throat, in between your breasts.
Logan’s hands follow his mouth, running a trail from your shoulders, down long your spine, easily flicking open the clasp of your bra on the way. He glances up at you as he moves to pull the straps aside, dragging them down your arms.
“Do you know how beautiful you are?” he asks, his hands coming up to cup your breasts, thumbs fanning out across your nipples.
A jolt of pleasure shoots down your spine and pools low in your belly. You feel like you might spontaneously catch on fire and he’s barely touched you. You can’t remember ever feeling like this when a man has touched you, so consumed by want and need.
His fingers trail lower, brushing along the top of your jeans, popping open the button. You grab for his hand, stopping him. You see the concern flicker across his face and you smile. “Your turn,” you say, sliding your palms up his chest and pushing the flannel from his shoulders, his shirt following suit.
You revel in his muscular physique, your fingers tracing along his collarbones, down over the broad planes of his chest, feeling the wiry hair beneath your fingertips. His muscles flutter beneath your touch as you follow the trail of hair lower, down to the vee between his hips.
Logan’s arousal is evident by the tenting of his jeans, and your eyes locked on his, you dip lower, giving the faintest of caresses over the fabric.
“Fuckin’ hell,” he curses. “Take your pants off.”
It’s a command, not an ask, and one you’re more than willing to comply with.
Nervous energy licks at your skin as your fingers tuck into the waistband of your jeans and pull them down. Logan follows your lead, unbuckling his belt and shoving his jeans over his hips, kicking them aside. His cock juts out proudly, thick and heavy, nestled in a bed of hair.
Logan’s on you before you can kick away the last leg, hoisting you up under your thighs and forcing you to wrap your legs around his hips. His palms are hot against your ass and you can feel his cock trapped between you.
He moves you both to the bed, setting you down before crawling over you and slotting himself between your thighs. Leaning back on his heels, he stares down at you, skin flushed. He kisses you softly once, before dragging a single finger down the center of your chest, hooking it into the waistband of your panties.
“What do you like?” he asks lowly, eyes boring into yours.
You stare at him, unable to comprehend his question as he slides his finger back and forth across your skin. Electric sparks of anticipation crawl up your spine and you can feel the rapid flutter of your heart against your ribs.
“You want me to touch you with my fingers?” His voice is low, so low and you shiver.
Your mouth has gone dry and you can only nod.
“You want me to touch you with my mouth?” Logan leans down, skimming his lips across your collarbone, nipping lightly.
Your fingers stutter across his shoulders and wind themselves into his hair. Logan’s smirk presses into the corner of your jaw. “Want me to touch you with both?”
“Please,” you whine into his neck, breath hot against his skin.
Logan trails back down your body, kisses peppering over your neck, both breasts, your belly before he presses a kiss to the top of your clothed mound. He hooks his fingers into the waistband and looks up at you, asking for permission. At your nod, he pulls he material down, eyes never leaving yours as he trails his fingers down your legs and tosses the fabric aside.
You’re fully bare, exposed in a way you haven’t been in a long time and your nerves blush across your skin. Instinctively, you try to close your legs, but he stops you, his hot palms curling against your thighs.
“You don’t gotta hide from me,” Logan says, kissing your knee and spreading your legs further apart. “You’re so pretty like this. Flushed and wet and smelling so sweet for me.”
A jolt of desire zips down your spine. Nothing could have prepared you for the filthiness of words that would spill from his mouth. Or how much you’d enjoy hearing them.
“I don’t want to disappoint you,” you murmur.
“That’s not possible.”
“Other men have—“
Your words die in your throat as Logan grips your chin, forcing your gaze up to his face. His expression is soft, but his eyes flash with a glint of something dark. “When I fuck you, I’ll be the only man in your bed, understand?”
The roughness and edge in his voice makes you shiver and heat pools between your thighs. You swallow heavily and nod.
“I want this,” he says, his tone softer. “I want you. Whatever you’ll give me.”
Slowly, you reach for his hand and guide his fingers to where you’re wet and aching for him. At the first brush of his fingertips against your folds, you gasp and your fingers dig deeper into his skin.
“Relax, sweetheart,” Logan coos. “I’m gonna make you feel good.”
And then he’s touching you, fingers dragging through your arousal before circling around your clit. He caresses you like he knows you and you’re molten beneath him. One finger, then two slip inside you, pressing against that spot that makes you squirm and grip at the sheets beneath you.
“Fuck,” you breathe, “You weren’t lying.” Logan quirks an eyebrow, fingers still curling within you, his rhythm picking up speed. “You are good with your hands.”
His chuckle rumbles through his chest as he continues to move, this thumb working over your clit. Your hips jolt off the bed when Logan replaces his thumb with his tongue, drawing the sensitive bud into his mouth.
He continues to work your cunt, long, flat presses of his tongue against your clit punctuated by the short, sharp thrusts of his fingers. The dual sensation is enough to wind that tension in your core tighter, building you up higher and higher until you feel yourself reaching that inevitable peak.
“Logan, I—I’m so close,” you gasp, fisting your fingers into his hair.
His growl against your cunt is enough to send you over the edge, the vibrations rippling through your body as your orgasm washes over you. Through half lidded eyes, you meet his gaze from between your thighs, his eyes dark with desire and you shiver at the intensity of his stare.
Logan crawls over you, pressing a kiss to your lips. You can taste yourself on his lips, bright and sour, as he licks into your mouth.
“Do you trust me?”
Logan’s fingers are still moving against you, wringing out the last of your orgasm and you can only nod. He withdraws his fingers and you whine, but he just smirks and taps your hip.
“Turn over,” he commands lowly.
A shudder ripples through you as you willingly comply, rolling onto your stomach as Logan’s palm trails from your hip over the swell of your ass. His fingers kneed into your flesh and you squeak as he curves them over your skin, pulling you up onto your knees, drawing your hips flush with his. The thick feel of his cock presses into your ass and you can’t help but push back, enjoying the strangled moan that falls from his lips.
“I can’t wait to be nestled deep inside you,” he groans, slotting his cock between your thighs, running the length along your wet cunt.
You peer over your shoulder and smirk at him. “Then what are you waiting for?”
Logan lines up then and the air punches out of your lungs as he slowly eases himself in to the hilt. He’s deep at this angle and you feel claimed, owned in the best way possible as he begins to move his hips. The drag of his cock against your walls is exquisite and you’re sure you’ve never experienced pleasure quite like this before.
His fingers dig into the flesh at your hips, grabbing as much as he can to pull you back into him and you push back, meeting him thrust for thrust. His grip is enough to be bruising, teetering that line between pleasure and pain and yet you relish it.
“Fuck, sweetheart,” he rasps. “Look so good stretched around my cock.”
Pleasure zips along your spine and curls along your limbs, each drag of his cock against you coiling that band in your belly tighter and tighter. Yet, you need more. You need to feel him, feel his arms around you, on you, feel his mouth hot and open against your skin.
“I need to feel you closer,” you whine. “Please, I—”
Logan’s arm slips underneath you, curling just under your breasts and pulling your back flush to his chest. He holds on, fingertips splaying across your ribcage as he fucks up into you, his breath hot and damp against your ear.
You turn your head just enough to capture his lips, your mouth pressing against his in an open-mouthed kiss. He steals the moan from your throat as his other hand dips to where you’re joined, fingers beginning to circle around your clit.
Slipping a hand into his hair, you hold him to you, your head falling back onto his shoulder. Logan groans when you rake your nails along his scalp and you do it again. Your mixed groans and the wet noises from where he’s thrusting into you fill the room and time seems to stop. There is nothing but the thick feel of him between your legs, the fervent press of his fingers against your clit and the tight grasp of his hand across your breast.
A litany of praise falls from his mouth and his words burn through you, setting you aflame from the inside. It’s too early for thoughts of love and forever, but you can feel something real, something undeniable pulling you together, uniting you in a way more than just physical. You’re bound to him.
Logan’s hand slides up your sternum, his fingers coming to cup your jaw, pulling your focus back to him. The pad of his thumb pulls at your lower lip. “Come for me, sweetheart,” he husks into your ear. “I wanna hear those pretty sounds you make.”
And you do, two more forceful thrusts sending you teetering over the edge, your orgasm ripping through you. Logan doesn’t stop, fucking you through wave after wave, his thrusts getting sloppier as he chases his own release.
“Let me feel you, Logan,” you pant, your breath coming out in short gasps. “Please.”
With a deep groan into your shoulder he comes, his cock spasming deep within you, painting your womb with his seed. His arm around your hips holds you firmly in place as he uses your body to wring out the last of his pleasure, shallowly thrusting as your walls caress him. When he finally stills, breath hot against your skin, you can feel your combined come slick against your thighs.
You don’t know how long he holds you like that, back to chest, keeping you in his arms simply because he can.
Only later, when the sweat begins to cool on your skin and your flesh pebbles, does Logan lay you down, finally slipping from within you. He pulls you close and you rest your head against his chest, the comforting lull of his heartbeat echoing in your ear.
You lightly trace your fingertips over the crest of his hipbone just to feel him beneath you. His breathing evens out, approaching that blissful edge of sleep when you glance up at him. Logan opens his eyes, gaze meeting yours and he smiles.
“Logan?”
His hum vibrates through his chest.
“I think we’re healing each other.”
“Yeah, sweetheart,” he answers, “I think we are.”
#logan howlett x you#logan howlett smut#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett#origins wolverine#origins logan howlett#the wolverine#wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#wolverine smut#logan howlett fic#logan howlett fanfiction#logan x reader#logan howlett x fem!reader
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A King in the North.
Cregan Stark x wife!reader
Summary: A misunderstanding occurs between the two, resulting in Cregan doubting his ability to keep his wife happy.
Warnings: LIGHT SMUT. Fingering, anger, yelling, talks of sex, talks of cheating, making out, talks of cockwarming, ya know- the works.
A/n: this gif is so beautiful holy shit. Also- based on an ask!!
Part 2
Masterlist
......................................
"No, but in another life, I mean," She explains as she nuzzles further into his chest.
The two sat in the Godswood and rested against the heavy bark of a tree. Cregan's cloak was wrapped around her as he tried to ignore the light scratching of the wood on his back.
"Another life? There's no point in dreaming of one, is there? I have this life, and I am eternally grateful for it," He quietly quips, as if not to disturb the nature around them. "I'm grateful for you. I don't wish for any other life than this."
She shifts in his hold to look up at him. "But that would be spoiling the fun. I know you love me and I know you love your life. But imagine that you lived a different one- what name would you want?"
Cregan gives her a look before sighing and giving in to her whims. He drew her to him as he stared up at the sky through the canopy of branches and the occasional leaves that still remained. "I'm not sure."
"Cregan-"
"-I'm considering your question. Just let me think."
It wasn't a rude scold, more of a soft chide, an assurance that he was going through with the question. She could hear the sound of him rubbing a hand over the scruff on his face.
"I used to be angry at my father for not naming me after his father."
It was a whispered declaration. Knowing Cregan as she did, odds are, no one else knew that about him. He never willingly threw out personal information like this, especially about his father who had died too early and left Cregan with a hole in his heart and all of the North to lead.
She reached up to lightly brush at his cheek. "Remind me his name."
Cregan hummed. "My grandfather? Benjen."
She admired Cregan from her place against his chest.
And Cregan knew that well. He could tell from his peripheral vision that she was doing so, but he made no motion to acknowledge it. He only stared ahead at the trees and dead grass that spanned as far as the tree line would let him.
But the feeling of her light breaths against his jaw and her fingers across his cheek were almost too much to ignore.
They had been married for a few moons now, and in that time, they had indulged themselves in the other quite well and quite often, but he still found that he could never have enough of her.
So he dared to meet her eye.
She had a look in her eyes that he couldn't quite place. A kind that was not lustful per se, but still made his cheeks a bright red every time he saw it.
Admiration, maybe?
Her fingers still danced across his cheek as her eyes slowly took in his face, starting with eyes and wandering down, taking extra time at his lips. "I would consider you more of a Torrhen," she admittedly so softly, he barely registered it.
A breath escaped him and his a small spark lit in his eyes. "Torrhen, you say?"
She nods, her eyes now shamelessly admiring his lips. "Yes. You could be a king, couldn't you?"
"Fu…" he trails off in a breath. His large hand grabs hers, pulling her hand down to his lips. He kisses her palm, trying not to get too caught up in the sight of her watching him do so.
He then pulls her hand down to his chest as a way to ground the two. "Careful, sweet girl. You speak of treason so openly."
She doesn't let this go. "Few know the implications of calling you such a name."
He considers her words. "I suppose. But still." He tilts her head up to look at him. "No more talks of rulers besides our Queen. Understand me?"
"You know I only jest."
"I do. But I'd hate for such words to get to someone without understanding of your wit."
"Of course. I understand." She pushed herself up, brushing her lips against his. "Torrhen Stark."
He let out a low groan, trying to control the way his body reacted to her words. He couldn't help leaning in just enough to try to connect their lips.
She got up quickly, managing to get out of his arms due to his guard being down.
He reached out to try to grab her at the last second, but she was too quick. "Little minx."
She grinned widely, pulling the cloak around herself. "I'll see you at Winterfell."
He told himself he just didn't wish to scold her, but in all honesty, he adored the nickname. It stirred something in him.
…
A few weeks had passed since then, and winter was approaching closer by the day.
That meant Cregan had less and less time with his wife.
It had began to wear on the poor man, the stress getting the best of him. Dark circles were always under his eyes during this time of year.
The time away from Cregan had hurt her as well, but it showed in different ways.
The time spent together every night was now spent apart.
He spent every night stuck at a desk with various letters and scribes around him as he began to prepare for his trek to the Wall.
She spent every night in a very different manner.
…
"My lord," A hushed voice came through the door. "My lord!"
He would usually send away whoever it was, but he hesitated this time. "Enter."
The door opened and his wife's handmaiden walked in. His full attention moved to her as he stood. She would only be here if it was something involving his wife.
"I… Forgive me, my lord. I've not entered on hopeful circumstance."
His blood ran cold. "What do you mean?"
"It's… a personal matter of my lady. She has no knowledge of my being here."
Cregan's weight shifted from foot to foot. "Speak."
"It's the fourth night now. I thought of it as nothing at first, but the fourth night now means I owe it to you to tell you."
He was growing frustrated. "Speak," he growled.
"I believe she is bringing another man into her bed, my lord."
Cregan said nothing. He was frozen, as if the northern air had finally gotten to the burly man. "W… What?"
The handmaiden had never heard the Warden of the North sound unsure of himself. It made her feel guilty for having to be the one to tell him.
"How do you know?" His broken voice asked.
"I've heard… noises from the chambers. If it is true, my lord, the man would have to come from the balcony, for when I am not present, a guard is at least there at the door. And I've spoken to him. He says he'd never let a soul by without telling you."
He wrung his hands nervously, a trait that was foreign to him. "Leave me with my thoughts."
She lowered her head. "I am truly sorry, my lord."
"If it happens again, you are ordered to tell me."
"Of course. G'night, Lord Stark."
The door shut and Cregan slumped in his chair, an exhaustion overtaking him like never before.
…
A few more hours passed before he couldn't find himself able to focus on the papers anymore.
He dropped his quill down with a huff and abandoned the table completely, moving to his shared chambers.
His hand paused on the handle of the door as he felt the pitiful look from the guard.
He didn't want pity.
Cregan Stark fucking hated pity.
He threw the door open, partly hoping to see the man who was killing him from the inside out, but he was met with his side of the bed empty and a slumbering wife on her own.
He stepped to her side of the bed, running a hand over her hair, jealous of the warmth that radiated off of her in waves.
He shook his head and dressed for the night, fighting with himself whether to hold her closer or keep her further away.
…
The next morning, she woke up to a loud noise, prompting her to sit up in alarm.
"Cregan?"
The man mentioned looked up from his work. "Hmm?"
"What are you doing?"
Thick boards were now being nailed into the walls of the balcony doorway, the sun barely visible through the ones already done.
He shrugged. "Fixing something." He looked between the boards and her eyes, trying to catch something. A slip of any kind. "Is this a bother to you?"
"Well, only to my sleep." She wanted to complain and ask him to do it later in the day, but he valued what time he did have to be in the room, and she'd never ask him to change it.
"Oh, I imagine it will be," he muttered softly and began to loudly pound another nail in.
She didn't care enough to question more of his antics, getting up and throwing a decent enough cloak over herself and leaving the room to start her day.
Cregan's eyes followed her, and a guilt only then began to gnaw at him.
She gave him no reaction. Nothing. She had nothing to hide, it would seem. Still, he wouldn't take the chance.
He wouldn't let another man come in and do the one thing meant for him. Just his.
Wardens for the North will come and go, but no one would touch her if he had any say.
Insecurity was something the Stark had never encountered before, and it terrified him.
But before he could dwell on it for too long, he forced another nail into the board.
…
Because of his earlier shenanigan, Cregan had neglected the work he needed to truly be doing, making his night even longer than it already was.
Every second filled him with more and more dread as he waited to see if her handmaiden would appear.
And surely enough, she did.
"My lo-"
The words couldn't be uttered, the door not fully opened before Cregan threw his chalice against the wall and stormed passed the spooked woman.
He'd kill the very man who dared to look at his wife.
He'd kill whoever let him pass.
He tried not to think of how angry, above all else, he was at her.
Because that anger was only sadness, almost to the point of tears when he considered it.
What had he done wrong? He knew his time with her was not much during the winter, but resorting to finding pleasure from another man entirely? It made him sick.
He didn't realize how fast he was walking until he stood outside of the chamber doors.
The guard looked at him with a grimace. It was clear that this time, Cregan was coming in at just the right time.
He'd have to apologize to her guard for having to listen to that for so long.
"Ah-" then a long, breathy groan sounded from beyond the door. "Oh, g- oh, Tor-"
He threw the door open, not caring for the thud or the way he worried it may come of the old hinges.
But he freezes up as soon as he sees what laid inside of the room.
His pretty little wife laid across the furs of their bed in one of Cregan's tunics, the fabric puddling around her due to its size. But that's not the part that caught his attention.
It was her middle and ring fingers that she had pushed deep inside of her, her hand covered in her juices.
Seems she had froze as well, for her hand was completely still and her eyes were now on his in a horrified expression.
His breath caught in his throat. "W-Wife?" He asked hesitantly.
She slowly pulled her fingers out of her, and Cregan felt his pants tighten. She then sat up. The tunic covered more of her than he wanted, and what wasn't, she covered by pulling her legs up. She took in a sharp breath, "Forgive me."
She was beginning to cry.
But Cregan was still frozen. His mind was struggling to comprehend it all.
"I-" she sniffled. "I was getting so lost without your touch. I… I should have waited. A good wife would wait. Not do it all herself. That would be selfish," she looked up at him. "Wouldn't it?"
The sight of her frightened confession and shaking body snapped him back to. He pushed himself toward the foot of the bed. "I… I don't think it is," he whispered.
He tried to ignore her fingers as they fiddled with the strings at the top of the tunic.
"You looked so angry."
He gritted his teeth and looked back at the door, as if he could see the event that happened only moments before. "I was."
"At me," she clarified.
"No," he chastised. But this didn't clear everything up. He forced himself to not get lost in her pitiful eyes. "Whose name was that on your lips?"
"Hmm?" She seemed lost, as if he had asked a stupid question.
His head ticked to the side. "Don't do that. Whose name was that?"
"Yours," she said as if it was obvious.
"Don't lie," he growled. He couldn't help it as much as he tried. His heavy steps moved him to around the bed to her side now. "Look at me."
She forced her head up, tears now streaming down her face.
"Whose. Name. Do you moan. When I'm away?"
"Yours," she began to sob. "I only think of you!"
His anger only grew. He grabbed her jaw and leaned over her. It was an impending sight to see such a large man tower over a smaller woman in her bed. "I'll give you one more chance before I give up entirely. I'll not have a marriage built of lies."
"Cre-" she hiccuped. "Cregan, you're frightening me."
"I know, but I need the truth."
She now understood the fear in the eyes of his enemies when Cregan entered a room.
He was a frightening sight when he wished to be.
"If you didn't like the name, you should have said so," she whispered.
It clicked in his mind.
Fuck.
He pulled away as if burned, and stalked to the doorway, poking his head out to the guard. "Tell me the name you've heard these last nights."
"I-I believe it was Torrhen, my lord."
"Fuck!" Cregan yelled out to no one in particular.
He brought his head into his hands, making himself take deep breaths.
"You're dismissed for the night."
"My lo-"
"Get. Out."
Cregan shut the door, softly the time.
He turned to see the woman bawling on the furs of their shared bed. "I owe you more apologies than my words can describe."
She shook her head, her clean hand wiping back and forth, trying to keep the tears at bay. "Don't. I was selfish. I'm a horrid wife to you."
"I'm not angry at you," he persisted.
She paused and looked up at him. "What then?"
"They told me you were unfaithful to me, and I panicked. And all this time you've-" He sighed. "You've only been busy with yourself."
When she said nothing, he continued. "Moaning the name of another man?" He chuckled lightly, "Another man, my arse." He looked down at her, seeing that the tears were beginning to stop. He grabbed her other hand, only still barely wet with her moisture, and he cursed at the sweet thought of what he had truly walked in on. "Do these pleasure you as well as I can?"
She shook her head.
He nodded. "I can imagine. You should have only asked, my love."
"You're busy-"
"And you can keep me company," he teased as he sat down next to her. He nipped at her ear, "You can always rest on my cock while I work."
She let out a gasp at that, her hiccups now moving into small laughs.
"Would you do that?" He tried again. "Would you warm my cock while your king works?"
His words were beginning to have an effect on her.
"Hmm?" He asked, trying for an answer. "Would that keep such an eager woman at bay? I need an answer from you, sweet girl."
Her mouth opened a few times, only to close again. Finally, she only nodded.
"Good. Now, if you decide to forgive me- Make yourself decent and join me, hmm? You'll find that your king may request your presence if you take too long."
He could see the light come back to her eyes.
"I'll be waiting," he said as he kissed her temple and moved out of the room.
...........................................
A/n: a part 2 is in order 👀
Edit: Here's part 2!!!
Taglist: @twinkletwinklenotastar, @kidd3ath,@yujyujj, @misswynters, @cosmosnkaz, @sithapprentice, @kaniromi, @lovemesomevesey, @its-jackie-bb, @8812-342, @thorins-queen-of-erebor, @kingdomzeldaquest @nyxbranwenn, @callsignwidow, @a1lexh-blog, @alyssa-dayne, @ethereal-athalia, @ashovertheriver, @lost-in-fiction-like-ur-mom, @dozcan123, @wangjiangelangel, @kamitargaryen, @aegonswife, @lv7867, @helpmedecideaname
#fanfiction#house of the dragon fanfiction#cregan stark x you#cregan stark x reader#game of thrones imagine#game of thrones x y/n#cregan stark x y/n#game of thrones fanfiction#game of thrones x reader#cregan stark imagine#cregan x reader#cregan stark#cregan fanfiction#cregan x you#cregan x y/n#cregan stark smut#cregan stark fanfic#hotd cregan#game of thrones fic
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Could you tell us more about Dan from Levity Rises?
YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND HOW LONG I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO ASK ME AB LEVITY RISES
I recently updated the designs for them so I'll talk ab them all if you don't mind :]c
I'll add the most information on Dan though just for you bbg!
I do plan on making a few screenshot redraws (and potentially an intro animatic because an awesome person actually made a theme for this au)
THE MYSTERY TWINS ⇆ THE ORIGINAL MYSTERY TWINS
Stanley and Stanford Pines take on the roles of Dipper and Mabel! Stan's curious and is the more mystery focussed one whereas Ford is more energetic and active than his base counterpart.
Stanley is an adventurous young boy, looking for the next interesting trip to go on, initially thinking spending the summer at Levity Rises was going to be a waste of time. Though after arriving and finding the scrapbooks alongside the anomalies happening across Levity, he and his brother quickly became obsessed with finding out the secrets of the Rises, as well as who the mysterious Smile Pup(swapped with bill cypher) is.
Ford (often going by 'Six' or 'Sixer) is a happy go lucky and optimistic young child who is alot tougher than his base counterpart was at his age. Since it's typically only just been him and his brother, so he's eager to make the best of his summer by meeting new people, though he hides his polydactyly with gloves he changes frequently.
DIPPER ⇆ STANLEY
Dipper takes the role of Grunkle Stan in this au!
Owner of the mystery shack, Grunkle Mason- or (Big) Dipper to people around Levity Rises- is the resident faux scientist of the town. His personality is more eccentric, tending to get hyper fixated on paranormal paraphernalia, to the point in where he does lock himself away for periods at a time.
Not much is known about his origins, he just kind of always existed on the outsidea of the town, but after opening the shack to the public, people quickly accepted his presence due to his quirky personality.
MANLY DAN ⇆ SOOS
Dan actually takes the role of Soos in this au, being the resident handyman of the mystery shack! Though often the lines blur between his role and Wendy's from the original. Wanted to keep it flexible yk?
Dan's a real dude's bro, pretty dim witted and blunt but often chill and level headed- Unless he's challenged- dude's competitive as hell, it's actually crazy. His mother, dubbed 'womanly wendy', is the toughest lady in town, owning a diner, aptly named 'Wendy's'.
Dan enjoys working at the Shack as it's one of the few places that'll let him freely experiment with his logging with the nearby trees for his own projects and adding fixtures onto the shack, which Dipper is pretty thankful for since he can focus his efforts on other things. It's also because of this reason that Dipper puts up with Dan's outbursts and semi airheaded personality. So it's safe to say, he's there the majority of the time.
Stan admires Danny alot and the events of 'Into the bunker' happens with Dan in place of Wendy. This does mean Stan had a passing crush on Danny during the episode, but even afterwards Stan kind of puts him on a pedestal. Ford enjoys Dan's company often being called 'little man' and playfighting on occasion. The twins act like his little hype men and he enjoys hanging with them.
As for Soos in this au, he initially built the mystery shack and is frequently seen around Levity Rises taking on odd jobs and making people as happy as they can be, though it's implied that he hasn't found his true calling yet.
LAZY SUZAN ⇆ WENDY
Lazy Suzan takes the role of Wendy in this au! Hazy Jane is a part time worker at the mystery shack, and is stan's first crush upon arrival to the Rises. She's a bit of an odd soul with a less than perfect memory, but is incredible at making a homely environment for the shack. Despite that, she can be extremely co-dependent in some situations, especially with her boyfriend. Otherwise she's earnest and does her best at her job. The events of 'Soos and the real girl' occur with Jane instead of Soos (and Rumble instead of GIFanny). Despite wanting to help, Stan is incredibly pouty throughout the episode.
Here's the design line up as well as initial notes I made when redoing them!
Hope this answered your question about Dan :]
RAUGH THANKS SO MUCH FOR ASKING THOUGHHHHHH
(EDIT)
SOMEONE SUGGESTED A BETTER SWAP FOR BILL, I JUST HAD TO ADD IT!
(EDIT EDIT)
I'm fixing wording and stuff so it's easier to read soz :p
#gravity falls#gravity falls au#levity rises#roleswap#role swap au#alternate universe#dipper pines#stanley pines#stanford pines#lazy susan#manly dan#character design#when I made this the first time I didn't know- but tbh I really like the idea of this being a swap of that#I know relativity falls exists#Ily relativity falls#relativity falls#gravity rises#tbh the general idea was to have fionna and cake but gravity falls#character art#doodles#disney#gravity falls fanart#alex hirsch#concept art#the book of bill
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A fig tree for pixel dailies.
"Figs are planted in most Palestinian cities. However, it is most common in two districts, Nablus — especially in the village of Tell — and Ramallah — namely in Silwad, which became known as Im-Qutteen (mother of dried figs). Other villages also have names relating to the fig, such as Teeneh (fig). There are also flat areas called masateeh referring to the places where figs are dried to produce qutteen.
The fig has long been linked to Palestinian cultural heritage because it is nutritious and filling, and thus a staple of the Palestinian diet. It was known in Palestine as far back as the Canaanites. Palestinians have their own terms for the fig: while it is forming, the fruit is taqsh, then faj and then ‘ajr. Other used terms are nafal and thbeel.
Old traditional sayings reflect the importance of figs in Palestine. For example: ‘I tasted the first fruit, I hope my life has a long route’; ‘Eat the figs from the early season and the grapes from the late season’;* and ‘If we have qutteen (dried figs), we are safe from hunger.'"
-from The Palestinian Museum which took that info from 'A Garden Among the Hills: The Floral Heritage of Palestine'
Trees, would it be olive trees (which I also have a drawing of) or fig ones are important in Palestine. Just like in other countries, they provide shade, fresh air and produce. But in Palestine, they are also a symbol of resistance - as long as family's tree is growing, they are growing too; as long as the tree is alive, they are alive too.
When Israeli occupiers takes Palestinian's homes that they've built over multiple generations, they take their trees that they groomed too. When IOF drops bombs on civilians, they take trees with them. They uproot the trees, they burn them - because those trees remind them of people they've killed and whose land they have taken.
It seems like the world is slowly growing numb to cries for help; it seems like people are closing their eyes and covering their ears to not see the Palestinian blood on their screens, to not hear them scream. And Israel sees that and continues it's aggression on Lebanon. After all, if they can get away with a year (76 years) of genocide, why not start another one?
Please take any action you can. Protest, boycott, keep your eyes on Palestine and please, please, please donate to Palestinian fundraisers. I have spotlighted one fundraiser, for Falastin's family evacuation funds from Gaza that she organized in late June - it is still very far away from it's goal.
There are 24 family members that depend on that fundraiser. They need not only evacuation funds but also money to buy basic necessities like food and medicine that are very expensive in Gaza right now. Recently Falastin started hearing them talk about waiting for their fate because the funds this campaign gets daily are not enough to ease their suffering and cover evacuation.
Please, do not let it happen. Please, donate and check conversion rates before you do as:
10$ = 103 SEK
25$ = 257 SEK
50$ = 515 SEK
100$ = 1,030 SEK
I've talked about this fundraiser before numerous times, a lot of info can be found on this post [here] or [here].
Vetting info: #282 in El-Shab-Hussein and Nabulsi's spreadsheet [here], #957 in the Butterfly Project spreadsheet [here]
I do semi-regular art updates (last one [here]) and accept commissions for proof of donations, please dm me for info as my art blog was terminated recenty.
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hungarian/nomadic magyar tumblr circa 998AD dashboard simulator
🏞️ vándor-ló-979 Follow
not yall still spreading emese's foundation myth??? she literally claims she fucked a bird????? like either she's lying or she cheated and she's trying to cover it up or well. i dont even want to consider the third option
🪺 magánügyek Follow
tengri forbid women do anything???
735 notes
🦅 szél-könnyű-szárnyán-szállj Follow
okay im sick of the discourse let's do this.
8,572 notes
🐎 istván-rovására Follow
that took so long lmao -> !!!!!!!∧◇ᛏ⋈∧
481 notes
🐴 csillagösvény Follow
i'm so serious rn if you support """istván""" in any way just unfollow and block me. we do NOT need him or his dumbass god and what he's been doing to our people to spread his religion is shameful.
🐴 csillagösvény Follow
btw we all know your real name is vajk stop larping as a christian it's EMBARRASSINGGGG
✝️ esztergom-örökké Follow
love seeing my mutuals reblogging this /s anyway op has multiple posts on their blog supporting quartering and human sacrifice. in case you were wondering. anyway stand with István
🐴 csillagösvény Follow
1) we dont even do human sacrifices, are you fucking stupid??? show me ONE post where i talk about that. 2) are you seriously forgetting that your bestie istván LITERALLY QUARTERED HIS UNCLE?????
#sorry to put this dumbass on the dash😭 dont even engage just block them #ur not making it up the tree of life lmao #discourse
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🌅 bolygó-kárpáti Follow
friendly reminder that just because you're white passing doesn't mean you're not a real magyar!! people with mixed parents are just as valid <3
🏇 attila-népe Follow
cranky coz ur ancestors decided to mix with the europeans arent you
🧺 lemezelő Follow
isnt your girlfriend literally frankish????
🏇 attila-népe Follow
you had to have done some serious stalking to find that💀 and first of all i didn't have a choice, my parents picked the tribe, and second of all she's not my "girlfriend" i got her via ritual kidnapping (WITH consent. before anyone gets weird)
🌐 a-kiber-kovács Follow
Couldn't you have kidnapped another magyar woman? Or someone from another mongoloid tribe?
🔅 hadúrsimp Follow
ohh sure so now human pet guy is gonna chime in to advocate for the kidnapping of our women while being lowkey racist. what are you even doing on nomadblr????
🌅 bolygó-kárpáti Follow
what the fuck happened to my post
19,276 notes
🪔 rakabonciás Follow
for the nth time, you're only a true shaman if you were born with teeth OR with extra fingers OR in the sac. the rest of you are faking & we can tell.
🦅szél-könnyű-szárnyán-szállj Follow
okay people keep spreading this but this is literally just wrong?? like congrats on the 6 fingers op im glad u and Little Golden Father have a special connection (genuinely) but like. táltos and sámán and mágus and garabonciás and javas etc are all different things with completely different requirements and life paths which you should definitely know if you're claiming to be one?? especially since your post says shaman but you're listing the criteria for a táltos, and your username looks like a play on garabonciás so. which is it🤔 maybe get your facts in order before trying to gatekeep
anyway don't listen to op!! your connection to the Upper World is yours alone and you're the best judge of what the Fathers and Mothers want your path in life to be!!
646 notes
🛐 mea-culpa Follow
It breaks my heart that the majority of my people still refuse to see the One True God and insist on sticking to their pagan spirits. I fear that when judgement day comes, we will all be wiped out thanks to their foul godless ways.
🐴 csillagösvény Follow
how tf am i godless when i literally have dozens of gods? little mothers and little fathers are in everything all around us & it must suck ass to live in a world where you're not surrounded by the small gods that inhabit everything. manifesting that the fene and the guta tag team beat your ass tonight
🔅 hadúrsimp Follow
hadúr will literally strike op down personally. he told me himself. whispered it to me sweetly even
🐴 csillagösvény Follow
while i agree with you, i feel like you might also have ulterior motives, nomadblr user hadúrsimp
#but live your truth! doubly so on the posts of these freak repressed bible lovers. meanwhile on the #COOL side of magyarhood we walk around butt ass naked!!! op have fun never experiencing joy ever again tho #discourse
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👑 sanctus-stephanus Follow
posting from an alt so i don't get cancelled but lowkey i'm starting to think koppány was right.... maybe this christianity thing isn't gonna work out after all
👑 sanctus-stephanus Follow
WRONG BLOG
👑 sanctus-stephanus Follow
THIS WAS A JOKE. IGNORE THIS
🪺 magánügyek Follow
ISTVÁN????????????? 💀
#the usernames wont make any sense unless ur hungarian and insane about the era im sorry. i hope the rest is funny to foreigners too tho🙏#i woke up in the middle of the night and typed out the majority of this then fell back asleep#hopefully that provides some nice extra context to jt#it's especially funny coz I've been meaning to make this post for like. legit at least 7 or 8 months now#so ig inspiration struck in the middle of the fkin night. finally. well here you go#dashboard simulator#dashboard sim#history#hun mythology#mythology#hun culture
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spending the small hours of the night thinking about how hdb views the mere act of caring for him as inhuman.
#like. even the kindest doctor i have ever had let me withdraw from multiple antipsychotics mood stabilizers and antidepressants alone#trying and failing to figure out how to taper down safely from the internet. most things suggested getting smaller scripts filled#our society wasnt built for people like us. it is so so tiring to be poor and disabled in this world and its tiring to love someone who is#so eventually we're abandoned. the people who loved us get tired of it. especially once youre safe enough to stop posturing#to admit that everything hurts and you dont want to get out of bed or you cant pick up the dog or youre just too fucking tired#because youre no longer what you were. these things constantly change you.#yes i loved to swim and to ice skate and to climb trees and sit and survey the world around me. no i cant do that anymore.#does it make me less interesting? does it make me harder to love?#how much is changed when im sitting on the shoreline and youre in the ocean?#this got away from me. it feels hard to be loved in a body like this-in a mind like this. it must be saintly. angelic. innocentic. to do so#tomorrow night is my favorite holiday but it leaves me thinking a lot about devotion#about ruth clinging to naomi- the realization that what you have found would destroy you should you lose it.#where you die i will die and there i will be buried may the lord deal with me be it ever so severely if anything but death separates us#it's so hard when the thing that separates you is your punishment already#dream dora talks about his depression and how he gets too sad and phone dora tells him hes drunk no matter what he says#the resentment of his mental illness and addiction. his poverty too- i doubt the line where she calls him a poverty-stricken fuck is real#but the emotion behind it was definitely in her#all of the reasonings my ex fiance gave for leaving boiled down my mental illness (blatantly said it a couple times too)#but ik physical disability stuff bothered them too#it's fucking hard#the parts of you that everyone resents are finally accepted and embraced and then used to blame you for the end of something#yes of course there were things i did wrong as a person and things harry did wrong as a person.#that doesnt stop the things about ourselves that are already distressing from being paraded as a moral failure by someone we trusted#all of this to say. sometimes it feels like waiting for the other shoe to drop.#humanity has abandoned the poor disabled addicts of the world. when will you? it's inhuman to care. history shows that to be true.#idk. i have to be up in 3 hours. im sure ill have more coherent thoughts about this after work tomorrow. rn I'm just. here's a mess lol#or maybe not! i have to put the finishing touches on my cheesecake before sundown.#ill make dinner and celebrate shavuot with my sister who is still a human despite caring for me#and things will be. as they are. or ill rotate these thoughts in my head and wont be able to fall asleep all night and ill ruin tomorrow.#who knows!
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Tree stuff
Most trees should outlive you. If a landscaper tells you the lifespan of a tree is 10 years, they don't know what they're talking about.
Trees are free. Carefully comb over your yard for baby trees, especially in mid-spring!
Similarly, If you live near a gravel driveway or gravel parking lot, you can find baby tree sprouts that can be easily transplanted by gently removing the gravel bits from around the roots, wrapping the roots in wet paper towel, and transplanting to a large pot.
Do not pile up mulch around the base of a tree. You can mulch under the tree, but it should be a mostly flat layer, not a raised mound, and keep the mulch a few inches away from touching the trunk. Roots need some access to air or the tree will grow roots upward through the mulch, and the roots will slowly wrap around the trunk and strangle the tree to death. It's called root girdling and it is very sad.
Trees need friends!!! If possible, plant two or three trees instead of just one. Trees share nutrients through the mycorrhizal network and they protect each other from storm damage.
Always get a tree that is native to your area and suited to your local environment.
Growing an oak from an acorn is easy. Go to an area where there are oaks in the fall, and collect the acorns that have turned brown and whose hats have popped off. Get large pots at least 8 inches depth, and lay the acorns on their sides on top of the potting soil, then cover them with a layer of damp fallen leaves, and leave them outside all winter long. Just be sure to cover them with some wire mesh or something to protect them from squirrels
Please keep oaks and other large trees about 20 feet from any structure because they will grow huge. Websites will tell you to keep trees X distance away from "structures or other trees" but other trees can go as little as 6-10 feet apart whereas structures need to be like 15 feet away minimum, generally speaking
Prune the tree while it's dormant, NOT in the middle of summer!
If you happen to be from the Eastern United States, please consider getting an oak! They are keystone species and host plants for literally hundreds of insects. We have too many maples here too, so maybe consider a Sweetgum or Black Gum for pretty fall colors?
If you have a tree that's tied to a stake to keep it upright, get rid of that thing as soon as you can, particularly if there's zip ties holding it to the tree, because those can grow into the bark and kill the tree...
If your tree is dead, please consider cutting off the branches and leaving at least 6-10 feet or so of trunk standing. Dead tree snags like this are important nesting places for many birds and you might see a woodpecker
If you live in North America, whatever you do, do NOT get anything marketed as an "ornamental flowering pear tree." They're typically Pyrus calleryana, and they're virulently invasive
Bugs eating a few holes in the leaves of your tree? Good for them! (They aren't hurting the tree unless they're like, fully skeletonizing it, and they're just the caterpillars of butterflies and moths. Want Luna moths or Tiger Swallowtail butterflies? Let the caterpillars eat their dinner mmkay.)
Don't throw away the fallen leaves! Butterflies, moths, stick bugs, lightning bugs, ladybugs, and many other insects hibernate the winter in the fallen leaves. Use them as mulch for flower beds, compost them, or just leave them alone! You'll probably want to stop mowing after the leaves fall if you'd like to see bugs.
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omo tropes i absolutely adore:
humping to help hold. watching someone wiggle and whimper and moan while rubbing against their hand or a pillow (or my fav: a partner's leg) is enough to make anyone's mouth water. when someone is so close to an accident that they have to distract themselves with the enticing friction of something pressing on their parts? delicious.
peeing in bottles. for amabs, they have to try and aim their twitching cock into the hole while drops leak out of the tip. for afabs, they have to line up their pee hole with the bottle's opening, oftentimes making a mess because the piss just sprays out too aggressively. either way, it's just sooo *chefs kiss*
physically holding the pee hole shut. this is something i've tried a couple times myself and let me tell you, it's a truly magical thing. with a finger firmly pressed against someone's pee hole, you essentially cut off their option of relief completely. no matter how hard they squirm and relax and even push, nothing can come out. they're forced to sit with the maddening feeling of fullness until eventually the finger is removed and all the piss comes gushing out of them in a torrent.
begging. probably a basic answer but i don't care, i'm a whore for dirty talk. phrases like "i can't hold it much longer" or "i feel so full" or even just "please let me pee" is enough to make me instantly slick. bonus points if there's a term of authority in there like mistress or sir.
peeing outside, especially in the woods. there's something so electrifying about squatting down behind a bush or watching a stream splatter against a tree trunk or make a puddle in the dirt, especially if someone is at their absolute limit and has to find a spot for a last resort.
having to stop mid way through peeing. imagine finally, finally getting the release you crave and then all of a sudden having to shut it off. the shiver you get, the way your pee hole convulses, your bladder aching with all that liquid still trapped inside. my favorite scenarios of this include: being stumbled upon while peeing outside, someone physically pulling a character away from the toilet, a dom stopping a sub's stream just to be mean, and even the classic "i'll just pee a little to relive some pressure."
being tied up while desperate. one time i read this fic about a girl being strapped to a chair and pressed for information by this guy who kept giving her water as "mercy" since she'd been there a while. her bladder started filling and soon she was desperate and he used that to his advantage, pressing on her bulge and teasing her until she broke and told him everything in exchange for access to the bathroom. i can't remember how it ended and god i wish i could find that again, because the idea of being restrained and not even able to squirm is delicious.
the iconic pee dance. i mean come on, what's not to love? when someone's resolve finally crumbles enough for them to abandon all sense of dignity, you know they're truly at their breaking point. seeing the full package is truly a treat; i'm talking hands shoved between thighs, feet prancing back and forth, knees bending up and down, body hunched over at the waist, face scrunched in concentration, the whole ordeal. it's the sexiest sight imaginable, especially if that dance suddenly stills and a flood follows soon after.
#omorashi#piss kink#pee kink#bladder control#bladder holding#full bladder#nfsw omo#need to pee#piss k!nk#pee k!nk#piss k1nk#pee k1nk
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Tired of Waiting
Anthony Bridgerton x fem!reader
summary: little pieces of your life as you fall in love with Anthony
cw: hurt/comfort
very loosely inspired by Love Story by Taylor Swift
Age 7
The first time you met Anthony, you had been playing hide and seek with your siblings. Your brothers had invited him to play and had declared that he be the seeker. Immediately, you had thought he was cute with his disheveled hair and outfit that was covered in dirt for reasons unknown to you.
He got along with your brothers quite nicely, but didn’t seem to pay you any mind. Almost as if he didn’t like you. And Anthony didn’t like you. He thought you were a know-it-all and didn’t like how you told him what to do.
You hid yourself in the tree above you and tried to hold back your giggles as you watched the boy and your brothers look for you, calling out your name as they did so. You let out a laugh that was a bit too loud and all four of them looked up, Anthony’s eyes going wide as he saw how high up you were. He thought it was very irresponsible of your brothers to let a girl such as yourself climb up there. But instead of helping, they all just laughed along with you.
Taking matters into his own hands, Anthony climbed up to help you despite your objection. You didn’t need his help. You got up there so you could certainly get down. And you certainly didn’t need help from a boy. Especially not one who was your not your brother.
“I do not require your help,” you told him, but he just ignored you, climbing the tree quicker than you ever could.
“No one said you didn’t require it, but I am offering.”
“Then I shall stay up here.” You crossed your arms over your chest, planting yourself down on the branch that you had been standing on. Thinking about letting him help you made you feel weak, like you couldn’t do it for yourself and you most certainly could.
You turned to face the setting sun as Anthony continued to climb to you, paying him no mind. You weren’t leaving that tree until he went away. He was not going to make you look like all of the other women. Because that was not what you were. You were just a girl trying to live out her freedom until it was time to discuss marriage.
Everyone stopped when there was a loud crack coming from below you. You sat up and sure enough, the branch was separating from the tree. Anthony finally reached the branch and him grabbing onto it made it completely break off, causing the both of you to fall to the ground in a loud thud.
He landed on top of you and made multiple apologies even though the fall hadn’t been that far, but you had hurt your knee, probably had even broken it. You screamed in response to the pain and your brothers quickly pulled him off of you and your oldest brother, Henry carried you inside to have your scraped knees taken care of. From that moment, you vowed that you would always hate Anthony Bridgerton.
Age 12
You got over your hatred for Anthony pretty quickly and the two of you had been attached at the hip ever since. You’d chase each other through the garden, threatening to kiss the other once you were caught, but that never actually happened. No matter how much you wanted it to. You knew it was wrong for a boy and a girl to kiss if they were not married, but that didn’t stop you from imagining what it would have been like to press a featherlight kiss to Anthony’s lips.
And Anthony felt just the same. He had realized that the feelings he had thought were hatred were actually of love. He had loved you and more than just a friend. He knew that he was young, but he wanted to marry you. So badly that it hurt. He vowed that as soon as the two of you were of age, he’d do it. If he had the guts.
Age 16
As you got older, you and Anthony talked much of traveling the world together. You’d go to Spain and Paris, and Italy and wherever else your hearts desired. You’d both sit in the study of your house and spin your globe for hours, closing your eyes and spinning the thing and deciding you’d had whatever it landed on to your ever-growing itinerary.
Not long after, Anthony told you that he would be traveling with his uncle through Europe. Coincidentally to the exact places you both had discussed going to. You had been a little upset, but ultimately felt elated for him to be able to do something so exciting. He promised that he would write and bring something back, but that didn’t seem like enough. You had spent every single day for the past nine years together and now you were going to be miles apart with only his letters and gifts to keep your company.
The next week, you saw Anthony off, giving him a hug that lasted a little too long for friends and stayed there until his carriage disappeared down the road. You felt tears fall from your eyes but wiped them away until you were alone.
You knew it was only going to be for a few weeks, but without Anthony, a part of you was missing. A piece of your heart had left with him and you were hoping, praying that he’d finally get the hint and come back and ask for your hand like you had been wanting for years. But he didn’t.
Age 20
Those few weeks had turned into months which eventually turned into years. Anthony had been gone for four years and you eventually threw away the letters he was sending you, knowing that everything he had said was a load of shit. He has promised to come back and marry you, but clearly that hadn’t been of importance since he had yet to do just that.
So, with that, you decided that it was finally your season to find a husband to which your mother reluctantly agreed. She had her heart set on you ending up with Anthony, but since he had failed to propose, she decided that it was probably for the best to just get on with it.
As soon as you had been declared ready to wed, suitors lined up at your door with gifts and many compliments which you took with a smile. All of them were gentleman, but none of them seemed right. The onto one you wanted was out of reach.
You found yourself at yet another ball to meet more suitors that you had forced yourself to go despite your want to stay home and read Anthony’s letters over and over again. You had been dancing with the man your mother had insisted was the right fit for you and no matter how nice he was, you had decided that he was a bore. All he seemed to want to talk about was his family and as nice as it was that he loved them so much, you could only hear about his six siblings for so long.
You looked around the room as he spoke and your eyes locked on a beautiful man by the refreshments table. He has the prettiest brown eyes and hair that was the perfect amount of messy. He was definitely your type and you had been determined to talk to him.
Once the song ended, you excused yourself from Edgar and made a beeline for the man that has caught your interest. His eyes locked on yours and for some reason, they seemed familiar, almost as if you had looked into them before. He gave you a smile and you swore your legs were going to give out at how pretty it was.
“Hello,” you greeted him with a curtsy. “I’m-”
“Lady l/n,” he finished, taking your gloved hand and pressing a kiss to it. How could he have possibly known your name? Unless- No, he was in Paris last you had heard.
“Anthony?” You asked and he just smiled. It really was him! In the flesh! How had he come back and not told you? Perhaps the announcement had been in the letters you had failed to open.
“I believe you should address me as Viscount Bridgerton,” he said, his lips right by your ear, causing you to shiver.
“That would mean that I respect you and at this moment, I don’t.” You pulled your hand from his and headed out of the ballroom, down to the courtyard.
Anthony took off after you, quickly gaining up on you. What had he done wrong? Once upon a time, you worshipped the ground that he walked on and now you were treating him like he was dog shit you had just stepped in.
He told you he was going to come back and marry you and now that he had, you didn’t want anything to do with him. He knew that he had been gone longer than intended, but he had hoped you still would have been happy to see him. Apparently, he was wrong.
Anthony followed you into the hedge maze that took up most of the courtyard and was having trouble keeping up since you had sped up into a run. What even was the purpose of a hedge maze?
He eventually caught you by the wrist and you tried to wriggle out of his grasp, but it was no use. You were tired of running, but you were also tired of waiting. If you said the word, you’d be wed to Edgar within a month and Anthony would have been kicking himself because he hadn’t gotten there sooner. It was what he had deserved.
“Stop running,” he commanded through labored breaths and you just shook your head.
“No,” you replied. “I will not. I am so upset with you that I can’t even comprehend it.”
“Upset with me?” He still had no idea what he had done.
“Yes!” You looked so upset and exhausted that all Anthony wanted to do was hold you in his arms as a way to comfort you.
“Why?”
“Why? Be serious, Anthony! I have waited years for you and I shall not wait any longer. I am done with you.” That was like a stab to the heart. You should have just killed him. It would have hurt a lot less
“Done?” You couldn’t be done with him. You had spent too much time together for that to be true.
“I am to marry Lord Fletcher.” Fuck, he was too late.
“That man is a bore!” You had no interest in hearing his thoughts. He lost his privilege to tell you what he thought when he left.
“He is no such thing!” He really was, but you weren’t going to give Anthony the satisfaction of being right.
“And may I say old enough to be your father.” He was that too, but you weren’t really going to marry him so it didn’t matter.
“But he will be my husband. A role you could have taken on if you had bothered to show up.” With that, he he let go of your hand and watched you move further into the maze.
“But he doesn’t love you as much as I!” He yelled, loud enough for you to hear. You quickly turned around and marched towards him and grabbed him by his coat before pressing your lips to his. You felt him gasp into your mouth but he quickly melted into you, his lips moving with yours.
“You love me,” you said against his lips.
“More than you’ll ever know.” He pulled away and reached into his pocket for the ring he had bought for you in Paris. He opened the box you gasped at the beautiful ring sitting inside it.
“Anthony, it’s beautiful.”
“And it’s yours.” He removed the ring from the box and slid it onto your finger, tears welling up in both of your eyes. “It always was.”
“I’m sorry. I was horrible to you.”
“No apologies necessary,” he shook his head, pulling you into another deep kiss. “Now, shall we go make the announcement?” He asked, offering you his arm.
“We shall,” you nodded and looped your arm through his, the two of you making your way back into the ballroom to announce your much anticipated engagement.
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