#lectures 10-11 2-3 and 5-6

[la-galaxie-langblr]

Universities love to create timetables that suck 😔

[sodacowboy]

every now and then I remember that collecting hobbies IS a hobby and that it is indeed my hobby

[lilacstro]

academia astro observations (pt 12 <3)

its college season, and diploma season and a season (i am hopeless about my college life fr)

well nvm you intelligent folks, you probably cannot relate, lets go:

1.Smartest people I have seen have Virgo and Gemini placements 9/10 times. Especially, in 3rd, 9th and 12th house

2. Ok so Aquarius is an underrated placement when it comes to being intelligent, I think I have said it before maybe? But aquarius mercuries, stelliums and 11th/3rd housers are most definately tech savy.

3. OH having Grand Trine in air element*bows down* such an active mind, and so super smart, almost effortlessly but don't get lazy y'all that is one another thing

4. I think just like its sister sign somewhat? Scorpio people, especially suns are really good with money and finances, creating money and infact managing money as well

5. Sagittarius and Libra placements are very likely to succeed in theoretical subjects, like business and arts and history and both of them, civics 100%

6. Your 9th house sign or lets say element can show your learning styles, 9H in Air signs? You might actually study by yourself really well, probably using books and lectures. 9H in Earth signs? The people who like going to labs, practical experiences. 9H in Water sign? Feeling an emotional connection and desire to study or they would overwhelm themselves and come falling down, 9H in Fire signs? Ah, you all definitely need some kind of pressure to ground and sit down and grind but once you do you guys have some real passion and drive, like pulling an all nighter before an exam and doing well somehow vibes.

7. Virgo in 9H people can learn anything, ANYTHING. Maths, history. sociology, you name it. All they need is time and desire for that subject.

8. This also makes me feel Virgo in 9H people are definitely the types to elaborate everything they write especially in academic settings so they could in fact do very well writing academic papers

9. Part of Fortune in 3rd/9th again makes you a good learner and someone who can do well academically. but it doesn't quite mean you will excel without studying ahem it just means you have this extra gift to you.

10. Aquarius in 9H people are most likely to be the ones who ask the most questions in class, even if it feels it maybe totally unnecessary at times, but they are rarely afraid to speak to their instructors and ask curious questions even if they are non relevant.

11. Taurus placements, risings, or 9H, can actually be slow learners or late to bloom academically, but once they really learn something, boy its in their memory forever.

12. I have often seen people with Gemini placements have surficial knowledge in things, or they may rush with things at times, and not really go into deep details like Virgos or Aquarius people, just my observation

13. Uranus in 9H or 3H people can change majors a lot, and maybe just be uncertain overall with what they have to do.

14. Ruler of 9H in 8H can show there might be some kind of sudden nature involved in your college experience, maybe your suddenly dropout, maybe its a completely diffrent and transformative experience for you, maybe you get mental health issues in college etc.

15. College romance is likely for people who have Gemini Juno or Virgo Juno or Juno 9H/3H/11H (maybe through your friends, maybe college friends ahem) another one is ruler of 7H in 9H

16. Oh yes, people with Mercury as their chart ruler are again quick learners and also, really good at learning and very dedicated to studying things they are studying and would excel with talent or hardwork or both

17. Jupiter in 1st house people also actually come off as really smart and wise, but somewhat intimidating and know-it-alls when it specifically concerns to their academic abilities

18. Having pisces in 9H is actually one of the other indicators of being smart and actually, more of intuitive and intellectual smart, and these people actually may have some kind of emotional connection to their major and coursework not as in crying type of emotional but maybe their parents want them to succeed, maybe they want to do it because they feel like it. I also feel these people may like doodling while studying or using cute stationary or notes.

19. Mars aspecting Mercury, and you are very likely to get into full force with what you are studying, maybe go to the depths and get full drive and passion to be the best, have that competitive spirit inside you.

20. Speaking of which, it is yet again possible that people with Sun in 9H or Leo in 9H or ruler of 5H in 9H actually get competitive about studies. Infact if you have prominent leo and mercury placements both, this desire to be the best is even amplified (my mom has this, and even though her conditions did not support her completely to be as bright as she could, she still exceeded expectations imo and was always competitive about it even though she did not think of academics that seriously)

21. Jupiter aspecting Mercury people are more of wisdom smart or I may say curious smart kind of natives and there is rarely any sly and competitive kind of spirit to them, meaning someone who would want to share their knowledge most likely, talk about it to people and things like that, humble energy

22. Ego with what I know and can do is likely to come with people whose mercury aspects sun, they maybe can even make their scores their whole personality probably, there is a chance for this to happen though, so keep this in check maybe

23. Jupiter and Sun aspecting each other is another kind of placement that can give you some kind of pride and ego with what you know or you may actually get really defensive when someone questions your knowledge, however, another manifestation of this same placement is making your knowledge a beautiful part of your persona and sharing this light to most people, unafraid, these people can infact make great teachers.

24. Jupiter/Mercury in 12H people may really be good at deep research and probe, and these skills are again very important for researching and phds

25. Of course the Sag risings, we cannot miss them afterall. Even better if the Sun is in Scorpio or Mercurial signs the ability to pay attention to details and actually learn and teach things from scratch would be crazy.

26. Nadir in Virgo/Moon in Virgo/Moon in 9h or 6h/air or mercury ruled 3H natives may actually have some kind of mother who more so focused on the academic part in their life growing up or their childhood did have a lot of things around excelling academically

27. People with strong and positive mercury placements, or mercury in air houses may really be good at calculation and maths. Or even having an air sign/mercurial sign in air houses can count

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28. People who you have an academic rivalry with must have strong aspects to each others mars or pluto or both (there is some detail this point deserves but I am too exhausted I might add an edit here)

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29. This also makes me think of people with Pluto in 1st house, 10th house or Scorpio risings, they are 9.9/10 times always competitive, wanting to succeed and be the number 1, not in a toxic way but they really cannot easily see being left behind and if these people are academically inclined (they likely are since they are doing it), they would again want to do their best and be the person who is in some kind of rivalry with you lol

support me on ko-fi :)

paid readings are open xoxo

i have more but im tired af so i might make a part 2 someday, but its been a while since I have posted ngl but thanks for the support you all give me, ilysm

[danieyells]

@mayoigotokurousagi LAST ONE OF YOURS here's Jin!!!

Jin is. . .he's a lot sweeter than you'd expect once his affinity gets high lol. . . . I FEEL LIKE I ENDED UP WITH A LOT OF COMMENTARY HERE. . .he just acts very different as affinity goes up, i have to point shit out haha

I've also amended this one to be all of his voicelines now!

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"Where the hell do you think you're going? Quit dawdling and help me get ready." お前、どこほっつき歩いてたんだ？……さっさと支度を手伝え

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"Hey, you've got mail. Don't tell me you're not going to open it. What if it was for me?" おい、手紙。放っとくつもりじゃねぇだろうな。 俺宛があったらどうすんだ？ あ？

Jin, why would your mail be in my. . .whatever

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"...Get to the point. The trash here is so long-winded." チッ……さっさと要件を言え。ゴミどもはこれだから面倒くせぇ

"A party? I don't waste air on bootlickers. Try Tohma." 社交界？　肩書き目当ての奴らに構うつもりはねぇよ。塔真をあたれ

"Don't just stand there like an idiot. Hurry up. ...What? You got a problem? Spit it out." おい、ぼさっと突っ立ってねぇでついてこい。 ……何だ、文句でもあんのか？

"Kneel! Tsk... Where's {PC}? Bring her to my room." 跪け！ 　……チッ。あの女はどこだ。今すぐ俺の部屋に連れてこい

"What? Your schedule's not my problem. Just arrange it around me." あ？　お前の都合なんて知らねぇ。黙って俺に合わせてりゃいいんだよ

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"...Huh? I don't want to see your face at the crack of dawn. Get out." ……あ？寝起きから、その面見せんな…… 下がってろ

given how vulgar his speech is sometimes i'm surprised he didn't say "asscrack of dawn"

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Tell the chef I'm not in the mood for meat today." ……シェフに伝えろ。今日は肉の気分じゃねぇってな

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I'm not wasting my time fooling around with those brats today. If they're really that bored, just make them go on a low-ranking mission or something." ガキの遊びに付き合う気はねぇよ。そんなに暇なら、適当に低ランク任務でも行かせておけ

he's just barely avoiding making iPad kids out of Kaito and Lucas lmao

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Put my dinner over there. I'll eat later if I feel like it." ディナーはそこに置いておけ。気が向いたら食っておく

i am once again asking the ghouls to FUCKING EAT PROPER MEALS.

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"I need more data for this case...  Go find Tohma, servant." 任務の資料が足りてねぇ…… 下僕、塔真を呼んでこい

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"A Class C anomaly? Miss me with that weak shit. Why do you think we have a Vice Captain?" あ？　Ｃ級怪異？ つまんねぇことに俺を巻き込むな。 何のために副寮長がいるんだ？

MISS ME WITH THAT WEAK SHIT I AM IN TEARS WHO TAUGHT YOU TO TALK LIKE THAT. . . .

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"What about class? Ha. What makes you think you can lecture me? Worry about yourself." ……授業の時間？　ハッ、俺に説教とはいい度胸じゃねぇか。お前は自分の心配でもしてろ

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"You don't even know that? What do they teach here?" ……そんなこともわからねぇのか？この学園の教育はどうなってんだ

I guess Jin has a good handle on the material and everything he'd need to know, as a third year. I say 'as a third year' but Alan didn't understand some of the basics so--

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Bianerus! ...I'm not feeling it today. You can go." ＜ビアネルス＞ …………チッ。調子が悪い。今日はもう下がれ

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"It's late. We're done here. Leave." ……もう遅い。話は終わりだ、下がれ

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"You're late. You've got some nerve making me wait, servant." ……遅ぇよ。下僕ごときが俺を待たせるな

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"...I'm hungry. Go order lunch. For two." ……腹が減ったな。おい、ランチの手配をしろ。２人分だ

i guarantee you the pc did not consider that he meant "i want to eat lunch with you" the first time this happened. she probably just thought "damn jin's hungry today."

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"You have plans? Take a second and really think about whether your plans are more important than me before you open that mouth again." 今日は都合が悪い？ ……俺より優先する価値があるか、よく考えてから口を開け

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"...Why are you so chatty today? Just pour my tea and get out of my face." チッ……うるせぇ。いつもの紅茶だけ淹れて失せろ

'stop trying to befriend me and go away' lmao

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"You should be grateful I'm giving you the time of day this early in the morning." 俺が朝から相手してやってんだ。ありがたく思え

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Why do you look so worn out? If you're going to serve me, learn how to take better care of yourself. Tohma, take her to the infirmary." おい下僕、なんだその顔色は。俺に仕えるなら体調管理は万全にしろ。 塔真、こいつを保健室に運んでこい

why the infirmary. . .i don't think she needs a doctor i think she needs a nap. You're overworking her didn't Tohma tell you not to break her you donut

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"It's still early... You want to practice the waltz? Bold, aren't you? You're going to be sore tomorrow." まだこんな時間か。 ワルツの練習？……生意気に催促しやがって。 覚悟しろよ。お前は明日、筋肉痛だ

are we still. . .talking about the. . .dancing. . . .

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"You want to dine with me? Ha. All right. Show me if you've learned anything." お前と俺が、ディナーを一緒に？ ハッ、面白ぇ。お手並み拝見といこうか

impromptu lesson on table manners!?

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"It's quiet tonight... Sit here, next to me. We're playing a duet. Don't give me that look. You'll know this song." 今夜は静かだな……隣に座れ。 連弾だ。そんな顔すんじゃねぇよ。 ……お前も知ってる曲だ

I previously used the expression names to describe his expression as 'pouting' and 'like a spoiled child' but he mostly just looks irritated lmaooo

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"Waking me up every morning was your idea, so I'd better see you here tomorrow too. That's an order." ルーティンにしたのはお前だろ。責任取って、明日も起こしに来い。 ……これは命令だ

how quickly we go from "i don't wanna see your face first thing in the morning" to "i had better see your face every morning". . . . (it's not quickly at all. it's actually an incredibly slow process getting affinity up.)

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"...I was too active yesterday. Massage me, servant. ...What the hell was that? Put some muscle into it." チッ。昨日は体を動かしすぎたな。 下僕、次はマッサージだ。 ……足りねぇよ。もっと強く押せ

i love this one he's just like bitch what the fuck kinda weak ass massage is that put some back into it?????

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"You don't know about dining etiquette? I don't have time for this... If you want me to teach you, I better see that nose on the grindstone." テーブルマナーがわからない？ 面倒くせぇ……俺に教わるからにはそれ相応の覚悟があんだろうな？

we are reaching critical levels of "i need to make you presentable so you can meet my father" also I find it funny that this is after the "you wanna eat with me? let's see if you've learned anything" line. WHEN WERE THEY SUPPOSED TO HAVE HAD LEARNED OR DO YOU EXPECT THEM TO STUDY YOU AS YOU EAT

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"What's that? My helicopter, obviously. Quit gawking and get in." 俺のヘリだ。見たらわかんだろ。……いいから、さっさと乗れ

get in servant idk where we're going but you are going with me

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"I've got plans early tomorrow. Your house is too far. Stay here tonight." 明日は早朝から用事がある。お前が寝泊まりしてる寮からじゃ間に合わねぇかもな。 今夜は、ここに泊まれ

another expression note. . .he's looking away and putting his hand on the back of his neck here. He's shy, almost. Because he's not asking you to stay over to perform some task. It's not your usual master-servant dynamic. He just wants you close to him. As close as possible. He really is rather sweet.

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"Never learn, do you? I don't take you being here for granted. I know it won't last forever. That's all I'm going to say." 懲りないやつだな。言っておくが、こうやってお前が隣にいること…… 俺は、永遠に続くとは思ってねぇぞ

Jin makes a kind of sad face when he says it won't last forever. well, as sad as he can manage.

He knows that once your curse is broken you'll probably go back to your ordinary life. If your curse can't be broken you'll die. And if you, for some reason, continue to stay at Darkwick even after being cured, he'll be a fourth year next year--he's gonna go off to do field work. Eventually he'll work in the highest levels of the Institute and eventually he'll take his father's place as the president. With all of this, there's no way you'll be able to be together, no matter what. This is a short lived burst of happiness and attachment for him. It means a lot more to him than you realize.

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"(yawn) What's with that look? I'm not allowed to yawn?" ふぁっ…… あ？　何だその顔は。俺があくびして悪ぃか？

(between 11am and 4pm)

"The flowers you can see from the balcony? Yeah, I had them planted. ...My mother liked them." バルコニーから見える花……？ああ、俺が植えさせた。 …………お袋が好きだった花だ

the balcony bg and the front of frostheim background don't have flowers visible in them(i mean the balcony has potted plants but no flowers). . .i wonder what kind of flowers his mother liked. maybe the pc will grow them when they turn into a Kyklos.

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Sunset's supposed to be nice this time of year. Come on, servant. Before I change my mind." 春茜か……おい下僕、少し外に出る。 俺の気が変わる前に付き合えよ

(between 8pm and 5am)

"You're going to see the cherry blossoms tonight with the brats? Suit yourself. I doubt any of you can appreciate them." あ？　ガキどもと夜桜を見に行く？ 勝手にしろ。お前らに、あの風情がわかるとは思えねぇけどな

'you guys are too poor to appreciate nice things'

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"Those little shits are so loud this morning... They're worse than the cicadas. Tohma, go exterminate them." クソ、朝からガキどもがうるせぇ。 塔真、あのセミより鬱陶しい奴らを駆除してこい

MODS, PUT 'EM IN THE BLENDER.

(between 11am and 4pm)

"What kind of moron chooses to go out in the sun this time of year? Unless you want your brain to melt, stay here with me." わざわざこの時期、日を浴びようなんて奴は馬鹿しかいねぇ。 お前も脳みそ溶かしたくなきゃ、ここにいろ

jin. . .this is frostheim. it is PERMANENTLY WINTER here, even to the point of that the day-night timing doesn't change. It's not hot unless we leave the boundaries of frostheim. . . . THIS IS A THINLY VEILED EXCUSE TO GET YOU TO STAY WITH HIM.

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"You've got tickets to a fireworks festival? The view's better from a helicopter. ...You've got guts thinking you can show me a good time, peasant." あ？　花火大会の観覧席チケット？ 花火はヘリから見るもんだろ。庶民の分際で俺を誘いやがって……

'peasant' is worse than 'servant' in my opinion. . . .

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Haven't heard the sound of waves for a while... Get the speedboat. I'll drive." しばらく波の音も聞いてねぇな…… おい、今すぐクルーザーを出せ。操縦は俺がする

jin just shoving you into various vehicles to take you places is really funny to me for some reason. you're like his purse dog. he just wants to take you everywhere even if it doesn't really benefit him to do so. also he can drive a speedboat????

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"I overworked myself. Go get Tohma. I was right having him get that PT license. I should have you get one too." 塔真を呼べ、オーバーワークした。 あいつに整体の資格を取らせたのは正解だったな。 下僕、お前も取るか

. . .doesn't that take like three years minimum in japan. . .how did you get him to get that. . .didn't he only meet you like two and a half years ago and you weren't even in the same house then. . .is that a darkwick offered course. . . .

(between 11am and 4pm)

"A pumpkin spice latte? I'm not drinking this saccharine garbage. Give the rest to the brats." あ？　パンプキンスパイスラテ？ こんな甘ったるい茶は飲まねぇよ。残りはガキどもにやっとけ

what do you think he is, a basic bitch like you? Not a big fan of sweets. Noted.

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"My favorite family vacation? Don't have one. This conversation is over." 行楽の思い出？そんなもんねぇよ。 ……この話は終わりだ

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I don't play the piano because I like it. It's just force of habit." 別に、ピアノが好きで弾いてるわけじゃねぇよ。ただの惰性だ

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"...Don't fucking wake me up. Come back later." ……起こすんじゃねぇ。話なら後にしろ

he hates the heat he hates the cold. . .well he also hates mornings in general. . . .

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Why is my name on this snowman? Tohma, give me your gloves. Whichever half-wit made this has shit for eyes." なんで雪だるまに、俺の名前が？ ……塔真、手袋を貸せ。これ作った奴の目は、確実に腐ってやがんな

"is that supposed to be me. . .? aw hell no i am fixing this shit"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Tell the chef and the brats we're having a roast dinner tomorrow. Kobe beef. They know how I like it." 明日はローストディナーだ、シェフとガキどもに言っとけ。 肉は神戸牛でな。焼き加減はわかってるはずだ

i like that the frostheim ghouls eat dinner together like a family. . .jin looks at Kaito and Lucas and goes 'those are my idiot sons. i cannot stand them.'

(between 8pm and 5am)

"You're staying here tonight, servant. I'll show you an aurora you couldn't even dream of." 下僕、今夜は泊まれ。最上級のオーロラを見せてやる

see how this is worded differently from when he asks you to stay over because 'your house is too far away'? even when he's trying to be sweet to you, as long as he maintains your power imbalance he feels comfortable--he has something over you here--but trying to lay his feelings bare, just saying 'i want you to stay with me', that's so much more than he's used to saying.

His birthday: (August 31st)

"A birthday party? This has Tohma written all over it, that asshole's always using me to— You're planning it? ...I'll think about it." 誕生日パーティー？　塔真の奴、また俺を客寄せに使って…… 違う？お前が主催？ ……気が向いたらな

'that asshole tohma is trying to make me go outside aga--oh you're planning the party. oh. okay. maybe.'

Your birthday:

"The song I just played? It's G. F. Handel. He wrote it for the queen's birthday." さっき弾いた曲？……Ｇ．Ｆ．ヘンデルが、女王��誕生日に送った曲だ

in case you don't get the significance of what he's saying here. . .lemme fetch one of Tohma's lines for you--

"I'm no more than a servant. Frostheim is ruled by a king, you see." 私はあくまで小間使いですよ。フロストハイムには、キングがいますから

my dude I think jin just called you his queen--only for your birthday though don't get cocky, servant

New Years: (January 1st)

"Hope you're ready for another year being at beck and call, servant. First up, my New Year's courtesy calls. Go do them for me." おい、下僕。今年��俺専用の女中として必死に尽くせよ。 まずは新年の挨拶回りだ。代わりに行ってこい

'happy new year! your purpose is still serving me.'

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"What's that sad-looking box you're holding? ...Oh. No, don't throw it away. I'll take it." なんだ？　この貧相な包みは。 ……ああ、そういうことか。 捨てなくていい。受け取ってやるよ

jin is one of those characters who probably gets a mountain of chocolates given to him by admirers, all brand name and like from famous confectioners and shit. real nice fancy packages. so he sees your shitty little unprofessional homemade thing and is like 'tf is that' before he realizes it's for him and it's made with love and he just. . .ah. no, i want that, actually.

White Day: (March 14th)

"Keep your schedule open tonight. You're having a meal your peasant taste buds couldn't even dream of." おい、今夜は予定を開けとけ。庶民じゃ一生出会えねぇような美味いもん、お前に食わせてやるよ

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"Hey, are you all right? ...Tsk. If that was a joke, it wasn't fucking funny. I've changed my mind. Cancel all my plans for the day." おい、お前大丈夫か？ 　……チッ。質の悪ぃ嘘だな…… 気が変わった。今日の予定はすべてキャンセルだ

i feel like Jin is about to put together the most elaborate prank and it's gonna hurt someone's feelings or get somebody hurt and no one will find it funny and he'll end up feeling super shitty. like that one spongebob episode.

Halloween: (October 31st)

"Where the hell's Tohma? Asshole sent the brats to my room to beg for candy. Next time I see him I'm going to wring his fucking neck." クソ……塔真はどこだ。俺の部屋に籠持ったガキども寄こしやがって。 あいつ……ぶっ殺すぞ……

okay but did you give them candy?

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Go tell Tohma what color dress you're wearing tonight. Why? Maybe I'll wear a matching ascot tie. If I feel like it." 今夜着るドレスの色を塔真に伝えておけ。 あ？　理由？ 気が向いたらアスコットタイの色を合わせてやる

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"...Where the hell did she go?" ……あの女、どこ行きやがった？

(13 affinity and above)

"Shit... This is throwing me off. Who does that servant think she is?" ……クソ……調子が狂う。 下僕の分際で、舐めやがって……

he feels so wrong without you next to him aw

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"...You've got guts abandoning your place at my back, servant. I'm going to have to retrain you." …………っ、おい……下僕は常に主人の後ろにいるもんだろうが。 お前は再教育だ

ONCE AGAIN IT FEELS LIKE I PUT NEARLY ALL OF THEM IN IT'S ALL OF THEM NOW! The way he treats the pc in so many different ways but it makes sense with his character and feelings. . .as far as the home screen lines go, Jin definitely loves you in some capacity. He's actually quite clingy. . .i'm a little too sleepy for more coherent thought haha

[wardenparker]

Bones Full of Words, Epilogue

Javier Peña x plus size reader Co-written with @absurdthirst

“He pleaded so much that he lost his voice. His bones began to fill with words.” ― Gabriel García Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude

Javier Peña had no way of knowing for certain the American journalist he sometimes sees sniffing around the embassy for her stories is also getting information about the narcos from the same girls that he is. After Helena is brutalized by sicarios, it is that same journalist who comes to take her away and look after her -- giving Javi reason to pause and reconsider his opinion of the woman he had previously not considered as anything more than eye candy.

He has no idea that once she has walked fully into his life, he will be battling with himself over whether or not he should stop her from walking out it of again.

Rating: M for Mature but this blog is always 18+ Word Count: 8.4k Warnings: Cursing, alcohol, food/eating, talk of weight or size, domestic fluff, sass, married flirting, pregnancy, childbirth Summary: Thanksgiving time has come again, but the Peñas are in for more than just a nice meal this year. Notes: It has been such an amazing journey following these two through their love story! We hope you've enjoyed it as much as we have 🧡🧡

Ch 1 ~ Ch 2 ~ Ch 3 ~ Ch 4 ~ Ch 5 ~ Ch 6 ~ Ch 7 ~ Ch 8 ~ Ch 9 ~ Ch 10 ~ Ch 11 ~ Ch 12

There is nothing unusal at all about the dog being the first one to spot the car, but you're still slightly startled by the commotion when the hound in the living room starts howling to sound the alarm. After that it's the two kids who come scrambling out of their room and bounding down the stairs screaming "Daddy's home!" as if he had been gone more than just a few hours.

The whole brigade has sounded the alarm, and you can't help but grin.

Hearing the dog barking and the kids scrambling around in the house before he ever even hits the door, Javi is chuckling as he grabs the deli bag and his bag filled with papers he will need to read sometime over the holiday break. “Shit.” He hisses, turning back to the car to grab the drink carrier, knowing you would be disappointed if you didn’t get your root beer.

"Boys, you have to let your Dad into the house!" You call, coming out from the kitchen with a dishrag in hand. You had been chopping enough onions to sink a ship and washing the smell off your hands was extremely necessary.

“It’s okay!” Javi calls out, although it’s a juggling act to keep the drinks from spilling as the two exuberant kids launch themselves at him.

"You're going to fall over, babe." It is okay, though, and you're both laughing even as you reach forward over two young boys, one ambling basset hound, and a seven-month pregnant belly to grab multiple bags from his hands. "How was class?"

Javi snorts. “Half the class didn’t show up.” He chuckles. “I don’t blame them, I wouldn’t show up either.” He admits, knowing he had wished he was home with you and the boys rather than sitting in his lecture hall. “‘Professor Peña, whhhhyyyy do we have to do reading over the break?’” he pitches his voice up and imitates one of his students. “I really don’t give a shit if they read it or not, but they annoyed me so I assigned it.”

“Your reading list always makes for interesting dinner conversations, I’m sure.” There’s a grin on your face when he leans over to kiss you then head to switch gears immediately to catch your younger son as he launches himself into daddy’s arms. “It’s Steve’s book isn’t it?”

“Of course it is.” He flashes you a grin before he turns his attention back to his youngest child. “Were you good for mama today?” He asks, knowing that he is the mirror copy of a young Javier. So the answer is probably no.

“Yeah!” Your youngest affirms his innocence wholeheartedly, but you roll your eyes playfully.

“Come on boys, Daddy brought home lunch for everybody so let’s wash up.” It earns Javi another grateful kiss from you, since tuna sandwiches from the shop over by UGA campus are your new pregnancy craving. A tuna sandwich on their toasted oat bread, loaded with veggies and American cheese, with an ice cold root beer. He’s brought you home that same lunch every day for a week, and today he brought lunch for him and the boys too.

After the capture of the Rodriguez brothers and the take down of the entire Cali Cartel, Javier had been told his services were no longer needed in the DEA. Which was fine with him because he was going to tell them to go fuck themselves. He had thought about going back to Laredo, and you did for a month or so, but then a teaching position for criminal justice and political science became available at a respectable college and he took it. It only took two year for the University of Georgia to recruit him for their staff.

The blue house on the edge of campus with its white-trim windows and fenced-in yard has been your home ever since he took the job. The boys have started their lives here despite your oldest being born just before you left Colombia, and when they begged for a puppy last year it had been a beautiful basset puppy waiting for them under the tree on Christmas morning that really tied the bow on this being home.

“How are you and my baby girl doing?” After setting Oscar down to run after his brother, Javier pulls you by the waist to him, his hand moving to rub your stomach lovingly. He adores when you are pregnant and it’s especially sweet since you decided this was the last baby, and a little girl.

"We are not big fans of onions today." You grimace, knowing that it could be worse but that it feels like it's the only thing you've done all morning since getting the boys settled in their playroom. "But Marco came up wtih a new name he wanted to add to the list." The notepad on the refrigerator is where you keep the ongoing list of baby name ideas, and every once in a while the boys or another family member will contribute an idea as well. It was Chucho who ended up naming Oscar, and your brothers had pitched the name Marco originally. Names have become something of a family effort.

“Oh?” Javi hums, impressed by his excitement for the little sister due in February. “What did he come up with?”

The smirk on your face says you know Javi won't be as excited for long, considering his son's current favorite movie. "He would like to name his baby sister Donkey."

“That fucking movie” Javi closes his eyes and sighs, hating the fact he had taken Marco to see Shrek. Even though he loves it better than any other movie in the world. “Please tell me you didn’t write it down?”

"Oh no, I didn't." Your grin turns shit-eating as you point to the refrigerator where Marco's large, shaky handwriting clearly spells out the word and takes up four times as much room as any other name. "He asked to write it himself."

“Well I hate to burst his bubble…” Javi snorts at the slanted handwriting and the misspelled Donky written on the board. “We will not be naming our baby girl that.”

"Of course not." And that is where your expression turns fond again, shaking your head at your oldest baby but proud of him for wanting to contribute to a big family decision. "But I love that he's thinking about it."

“God.” He snorts, grinning at the antics of his children, but like you, he’s proud of them. “So no onions today, huh? Made you gassy?”

"The smell made me sick first thing," you admit. After washing your hands with the kids, the four of you can sit down at the table to have your lunch. "But I powered through. I don't even want to think about the chaos tomorrow would be if I couldn't make stuffing because of an onion aversion."

“You should have let me handle it when I got home.” He frowns at you, huffing slightly. “I know I can’t cook like you, but I can follow directions passably well.”

"I know you can, babe." The smell of tuna is like a balm over your senses when you unwrap your sandwich and you sigh happily. "But you have to go to the airport tonight to pick up our parents, remember?"

“I can do both.” He knows you want to have the perfect holiday, it’s just how you are. Even the few times you had thrown dinner parties in Colombia, you had wanted everything to be just so. Of course you want a family holiday to be perfect. “Let me help you. I know you’ve got to be tired.”

"I've got a plan." Having the biggest house out of your siblings after everyone had settled down and being the first one with kids has meant that the Peña residence in Athens, Georgia is now family holiday headquarters. While you love it, it is also a lot of work, so you've been working on creating a system. "Once everybody gets here this afternoon there will be plenty of childcare and Michael's wife insisted they're getting pizza and salad for everybody for dinner tonight. Paper plates and plastic cups so we don't make more work for ourselves. At that point there will be lots of helping hands and the work will go a lot faster."

“Beer is in the back of the car.” He had picked that up on the way to the deli you love. Thanksgiving wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without some Budweiser while watching the football game. Although he makes sure everything is done and you are sitting beside him before he sits down.

"Perfect. Thank you, cariño." Having a partner for a husband feels like it sets you apart from the other faculty wives that you end up spending time with, but not in ways that you're upset about. While the other ladies are rightfully bitching about how their husbands don't help out around the house or don't do their part with the kids, you tend to just keep your mouth shut. Javier is always there to support you and share the workload, helping to raise the boys as their other parent and not as a third, older child you constantly have to prod at. Right now is a prime example of it, as he gets the boys set up with their shared sandwich so that you can dig in to your lunch right away.

Javi moves to pour the kids juice into their cups. Marco has a Shrek cup and Oscar with his favorite Barney cup and then he cracks open a ginger ale for himself. The days of starting to drink right after coming home are long past him and he doesn’t miss it as much as he might have expected.

"So, Papa's flight lands at 3:00 this afternoon and Grammy's lands at 3:15." You managed to work the flight times out for both of your parents to come in at the best possible time. "Joey and his wife want to rent a car so they'll get down here on their own after they land, and Michael decided to road trip from Chattanooga so they'll probably be in last even though they're aiming for the same time as everyone else." Coordinating the families does take a little work as they grow, but it's work that you're all willing to put in. Especially so all the kids can spend time with their cousins a few times every year and really get to know each other.

“Okay.” He nods and smirks. “I would have driven to Atlanta to pick them up, but I’m happy as hell I don’t have to.” Both his father and your mom opted to fly into the smaller, local airports so they can be with their grandchildren faster.

"It worked out, thank god." The boys are currently engrossed in a conversation about something Saturday-morning-cartoon related that you can't quite catch, so with the first few bites of your sandwich you enjoy the relative peace. They'll be up early tomorrow to see every second of the Macy's parade so any peace you get today is wonderful. "And I am not grappling with your dad's addiction to pecan pie this year. I ordered one from the bakery along with the apple. Homemade pie crust is officially my nemesis."

Javi chuckles and nods. “Good choice” He teases. “Do I need to go brave the stores for anything else?”

"At this point, if we don't have it, it's not ending up on the Thanksgiving table." And that's the final word as far as you're concerned. "The last thing is picking up the pies, and my sisters-in-law already offered to make that trip tonight for us." You smirk, knowing your brothers' soulmates fairly well at this point. It's only been a few years but you're a tight knit family. "If they're willing to do the last errand, I'm not going to begrudge them getting out of the noisy house for a half hour later on."

“Damnit, she figured out why I always make the last run.” Javi grumbles, but he winks at you playfully. He actually enjoys when the house is in chaos and noisy. Far different from his own solitude for so many years. He’s less in his own head these days.

"Big time." You grin at him, stifling your laughter by having another bite of lunch. "You're the one who wanted a big house, babe. The price we pay is being the holiday house."

"I don't mind it." He had insisted the kids all be able to have their own rooms and he had wanted you to have a dedicated office as well as him. That required a big house.

As it does so often with him now, your smile softens at the edges. "I don't either. And it's going to be even nicer not having to bundle three kids into the car or onto a plane a couple of times a year to see family."

"Well, we had already agreed that the kids having their holidays at home was the most important thing." He reminds you. "Luckily our parents agreed and are willing to come to us."

"Marco gave us that privilege," you remind him, glancing over at your boys. "My mother would have flown to Timbuktu to see her first grandbaby."

"That's true." Your mother had been upset when you hadn't wanted her to come to Colombia for the last month of your pregnancy and the birth. She had flown to Texas to meet him as soon as the three of you had returned to the States.

“And honestly I’m glad that we’re close enough for your dad to get here without much trouble.” Chucho is still pretty spry for his age but that doesn’t mean you aren’t grateful for the quick flights between Laredo and Athens.

"I think dad enjoys flirting with the flight attendants." Javi jokes, shooting you a smirk.

“Probably,” you agree, smirking even though you shake your head. Chucho isn’t the kind of guy who would make trouble, so it’s harmless as long as the attendants don’t mind. “Gives the waitresses at his bar a break.”

"He's asked about your mother a lot." He waggles his brows suggestively. "We might have to put bells on our parents at night. Make sure they stay in their rooms."

“Nothing could be weirder.” The look of absolute confusion and discomfort in your face is immediate. “Our family tree does not need to tangle that way.”

He laughs at the abject horror in your eyes and reaches over to squeeze your knee under the table. "I'm teasing, sweetheart." He promises. "Pop asks about your mom, but only in a friendly kind of way." He can't be offended at your reaction, he would have the same kind of instinct if he heard something like that.

“Oh thank god.” You huff, trying to recompose yourself. “I know we live in the south. But we don’t need to be a stereotype.”

He huffs again, amused as you continue to shake your head. "Pop has started seeing another widow, someone from that support group you turned him on to." He had never really thought about his dad needing to talk to other widowers who had lost their soulmates, but you had seen it. Another reason he loves how you have folded into his life so perfectly. You softened his rough edges and noticed the unspoken needs of both of the Peña men.

“Oh good!” That seems to wipe the other thought clean from your mind. “I mean I didn’t show him those groups thinking he’d start dating, just that having some friends who went through what he did would be good for him.”

"Mama wouldn't have wanted him to be alone for the rest of his life." That he knows, having discussed it with her when it had become clear she wasn't beating her cancer. She had known that Javier could and would hold a grudge if he had thought it was disrespectful to her memory. So she had made her wishes clear to her only son. "It is good for him. He said he feels like a kid again."

“I wish we had known before.” Having devoted half your sandwich already, you reach for your soda. “I would’ve have invited her, too. Though in sure she has her own family to see.”

"She is visiting her grandchildren." He nods. "Although pop said he might ask us to come out to Texas this summer to meet her?"

“Absolutely.” That sounds just like your father-in-law. Chucho plans for the long term much better than short term in all areas of his life. “By then our little girl should be okay to travel a bit.”

Javi grins. "I think that was his plan. Show off his newest grandbaby."

“Donkey!” Marco supplies cheerily, having heard his mother say the word girl.

Javi rolls his eyes and sighs heavily while you giggle. "I'm glad you think this is funny." He huffs quietly.

“I have final veto naming rights on anything that comes out of my body,” you remind him with a smug grin. “Of course I think it’s funny.”

"Thank God for that." He rolls his eyes again and gets up when he sees your drink is finished to get you a glass of water.

“You won’t be saying that if I name her something ridiculous in a fit of sleepless silliness.”

"I don't think you want to give our daughter a name that will embarrass her." He points out and licks his lips before voicing something that he's been thinking about since finding out that that baby is a girl. "Is it strange or inappropriate that I was thinking about Helena for a middle name?" He asks softly, watching you to gauge your reaction.

“Oh.” That makes you pause, but when he puts the glass of water down in front of you, you reach for his hand rather than the glass. “I—I actually think that’s so nice,” you admit with tears in your eyes. Though your contact with Helena has waned slightly in the years since she moved to America, you still send each other letters a few times a year to keep up. “Someone we both love dearly…I think that’s a very sweet gesture.”

“I—” he flounders slightly. “She is the reason we found each other.” He murmurs. “The reason we have this life, our children.”

"She is." He is completely correct, and you squeeze his hand tightly for just a brief moment. Now that he's suggested it, there is no other possibility in your mind. "Whatever we pick, it has to go with Helena."

Javi sighs softly, smiling at you before he leans down and presses his lips to yours. “I wasn’t sure how you would like the idea.” He admits. After all, both of you had slept with her, so it could have been a horrible idea in your mind.

"I don't think it's a conventional decision, but we aren't very conventional people." Looking around the table, though, and then back up at him, you shrug. "At least, we didn't used to be."

He chuckles at that and shoots you a grin. “We have slipped into domesticity with surprising ease, haven’t we?” He asks you.

"We really have," you agree, leaning up to kiss him again when the phone on the wall rings.

"You stay there." Javi pulls back and points at you, knowing you would try to heft your pregnant belly out of the chair to rush over to the phone. "I’ll get it." He steps over to the phone and picks it up, reminding himself that he needs to get another cordless phone set so you can just carry one around. It would make it easier and the last one had been broken by the movers. "Peña residence." He answers.

“Hey mijo!” Chucho’s voice is cheery through the cracking connection of the cellphone that Javier had bought him to have while he traveled. “I just boarded and that gorgeous wife of yours said to call before I left Texas.”

“Hey pop.” He twists his body around and winks at you. “Yeah, she worries about you.” He tells his father while watching you. “Didn’t want you to get lost in the airport and miss Thanksgiving dinner.”

“Not a chance.” Chucho chuckles at that. “Tell my grandsons I’ll be there soon, okay?”

“They will be looking forward to it.” He promises and then hangs up the phone after Chucho says goodbye.

“Is Papa here?” Oscar asks hopefully, having heard his father refer to Pop and knowing that holidays mean his favorite family member in the whole world will be coming to play Spacemen with him.

“He will be in just a few hours.” Javi lifts a brow. “If you take a nap, he will be here as soon as you wake up and you will have allllllll the energy to play.” He’s not above making a nap sound like a good thing. Not if it lets you get a nap while he’s gone to pick up the parents.

"All done!" Your youngest announces with an enormous amount of ceremony, pushing away his plate – which actually is empty – and throwing up his hands as it was proof of having finished his lunch.

“Good job, buddy.” Fatherhood has taught Javier a patience he never knew he could have, and he’s been rewarded for it. His boys are already far better than he ever was and he knows they will only become better men than he ever could claim to be.

Getting the boys down for a nap is one of Javier’s best Dad chores, but when he comes back down twenty-five minutes later with the baby monitor in hand you both breathe a sigh of relief. “They missed you this morning,” you tell him, smiling softly over the kitchen clean up. “So did I.”

He hums, knowing that he had missed them too. “Too bad I can’t just lecture from my office.” He shrugs, moving over to where you are rinsing the glasses and softly shooing you out of the way. “Go sit sweetheart.” He huffs. “I know your back is hurting.”

"I won't fight you on that." Your back was a bit of an issue with your second pregnancy so you know Javi is being extra watchful this time around. The balance is good, though. Otherwise you would just go-go-go as much as possible.

“I know you didn’t get any writing done between the kids being out of school and prepping for tomorrow.” He talks as he continues the chore and loads the dishwasher beside the sink. “But how’s the chapter coming along?”

“Honestly I’m a little blocked,” you admit, leaning back in your chair and sighing at the slight relief on your back and belly. “I’m hoping that focusing on family this weekend shakes some words loose.”

“They will come.” He knows that. You are too good of an author for words to fail you. “Anything else you need to prep tonight?” He asks.

“I can wait until more people get here and hand out prep jobs. We like sitting around the table and bitching while we work.” It’s practically a family pastime, if you’re honest. Which is why it’s so fun. “There’s a few things to do but we’ll manage okay.”

“Sooooo.” He closes the door to the dishwasher and stands straight, turning around while he wipes his hands in a dishrag. “What about a nap for mama?”

"Could." You agree, folding your hands under your belly to support the bump. "But Mama missed Daddy and wants to actually see him a little."

He smirks and pushes off the counter to move over and lean down for a kiss. “How about I lay down with you until I need to leave for the airport?” He offers. “I’ll even rub your back.”

"You tryin’ to get me into bed, Peña?" You raise one eyebrow at him and smirk, pointing to your belly. "That's what got us this in the first place."

He smirks again. “Oh I know.” He grunts. “I was there for the whole thing.” You are absolutely irresistible to him when you are pregnant, even more than normal. He loves you carrying his babies. Although, right now he’s simply trying to get you to rest. He worries about you taking on too much this late in the pregnancy.

"Okay, okay." It's not difficult to see the worry in this eyes, and you put up one hand in defeat. "Help me up, love? We can snuggle in bed until it's time for you to leave."

“Okay.” You gave in far too easily, telling him that you are more exhausted than he imagined.

“I’m okay.” At the top of the stairs he is practically cradling you and you kiss his cheek in reassurance. “It’s just third trimester, that’s all.”

“I’m going to worry.” He’s good at that, but the worry over his family is far more meaningful than worrying about sicarios and drug dealers

“I know.” And just the fact of it brings a soft smile to your lips. “I love you, too.”

******

“You look amazing.” Your mother beams at you, eager to see her glowing daughter happy in your last months of pregnancy. “You’re carrying low, I’m so surprised it was a little girl on the ultrasound.” She teases. “What are you going to do if she was hiding a little thingy?” She works as she asks, filling the little tartlets that will be the appetizers first thing.

“We’ll be just as happy to have another boy if it turns out that way.” You promise your mother. While she fills the ham and cheese tarts for the appetizer table, you’re making the stuffing for the mushroom caps, and on your other side your oldest brother is making his jalapeño popper dip.

“Oh I know you will.” She assures you. “Javier is a wonderful father and you make me so proud.” Her voice cracks up a little, looking over into the living room where Chucho is keeping the boys entertained and Javier is diligently cleaning up when one of the boys had broken the rule of ‘no drinks in the living room’ and spilled it on the carpet in his excitement to see his family. “You have an amazing little family.”

“It won’t be so little pretty soon.” Michael’s soulmate, your sister-in-law Maria, reminds the table happily. Being in her first trimester with their first baby, she is sharing in the joy of pregnancy very happily. “Five counts as a big family, I think.”

“Not as big as some, but nowadays some couples are only have one child.” Your mother tuts, as if only having one child is an offense.

"Mom..." You shoot her a warning glance, reminding her silently that Javi is an only child. "All we care about is the kids being healthy and happy. One or two or three... it doesn't matter."

She grimaces and glances towards the living room, remembering that detail. She knows from talking to Chucho, they had wanted a big family. “You are right.” She quickly agrees. “Healthy.”

"Especially since this is the last one." Both of your families know that you're planning on a more permanent form of birth control for your family now. It didn't seem kind or reasonable to let your parents keep wondering if more and more grandkids would keep coming. "The only things I'm birthing after this little girl are books."

“How is your next book coming?” Her eyes widen with anticipation. “When I tell you, the book club is salivating over your last one, I mean they have extended the read.”

"I'm pretty sure your book club are my advanced sales every time," you laugh, grateful to your mother for all of her support in keeping your dreams alive and being just as proud of you as she possibly could be. Your family have really been your biggest cheerleaders. "This one is coming on a little more slowly."

"Pregnancy brain?" Your sister-in-law only half jokes. She's already experiencing some of that for herself.

"Absolutely." More laughter is shared at the table. "Pregnancy brain and being tired all the time."

Chucho ignores your protest and makes it a game, the boys competing for who can make mama the most comfortable.

"I was trying to prevent a fuss." Even though you direct the comment at your husband it seems to fall on deaf ears as everyone moves around again, and your other brother takes over making your mushroom recipe so you can go and lay down. Chucho and the boys have moved the pillows around the couch for you and while Marco is ready to give Mama and Baby Sis cuddles, Oscar has offered up his favorite teddy for your comfort as well. It's moments like those -- the most meaningful gestures from your young kids -- that tell you unquestionably that you and Javier are doing a good job. At their ages your boys have gotten past most struggles with sharing and have instead become compassionate kids who want everyone around them to be happy.

Javi grins as he brings you a Shirley Temple in a cup with a lid and straw. “You think a fuss wasn’t going to be made over you this weekend?” He huffs in amusement.

"I'm not the only pregnant woman in the house," you point out, gesturing toward your sister-in-law who is still sitting at the table.

“But I’m not as pregnant as you are.” She snorts, smirking when you huff. “You can cater to me when I’m about to pop, okay?”

"Thiry-two weeks still has a little way to go," you argue, though you sigh measurably when one of the couch throw pillows hits your back just right. It really is hell on the body to be pregnant, that's for damn sure.

“I hoping for a Christmas baby.” Your mother admits and Javi snorts, shaking his head. “Don’t put that on our baby girl.” He huffs playfully. “She would hate her birthday falling on a holiday where her brothers get gifts too.”

“Healthy and happy.” Michael recites your mantra for you, since you’re a little still trying to get comfortable. “But yeah, Ma. Don’t wish a Christmas birth on your grandkid. That’s hard for anybody.”

Your mother sighs softly and shrugs. “You’re right. I was just thinking about how wonderful the birthday pictures would be.” She admits with a laugh.

“What if we made a flower wreath for her, Mom?” You offer, setting it as nondenominational but evoking that beautiful celebration that she imagines. “An oval one big enough to lay her in for pictures?”

“That would be lovely!” Her eyes light up at the possibility. “She would look so beautiful.” The baby isn’t bore, but she already knows she will be the prettiest baby. “I loved your baby pictures.”

"And you'll love your granddaughter's too." Even through another wince, you have no problem promising your mother that. She has loved every picture of each of her grandkids and you know the next will be no exception.

Javi doesn’t notice this next pain since he’s walking back into the kitchen, but Chucho does. Glancing at you and then at his watch discreetly. “Boys, I think it’s time for bed.” He announces after a moment. “Do you want to say goodnight to everyone?”

Marco and Oscar go around giving good night hugs and kisses to everyone individually before Chucho volunteers to bring them upstairs and go through their nighttime routine with them. He always brings a new book of kids stories with him whenever he visits and this is no exception, so doubtless he'll read them a brand new bedtime story tonight as well.

Javi fixes everyone else drinks, another Shirley Temple for your sister-in-law and wine for Michael and your mother. He cracks open a beer for himself, but he doesn’t take a drink yet, waiting for his pop to come back downstairs.

When Chucho does finally reappear in the living room, he wipes his hands off in a show of a job well done. "They needed two stories, but they're out now," he tells you and Javi happily.

“That’s good.” Javi hands his father a beer and motions him into the living room. “Go keep your favorite daughter company.” He tells him. “I’ll help finish up the food.”

"I can make a little room," you offer, starting to shift on the couch.

“No, you stay put.” Chucho insists, taking the recliner next to the couch where Javi would normally sit and watch the news. “You need some rest.”

"I was fine all day." A fact which frustrates you to no end. Only starting to feel exhausted and a little unwell after your nap is a nuisance. "This is just a pain in the ass."

You wince again and Chucho hums, glancing down at his watch again. “Each time is different.” He reminds you. “You were so sick with Oscar the first few weeks.”

"This is Marco's fault," you joke, not meaning a word of it. "My first pregnancy was easy right until the end and it made me think more would be the exact same way."

He chuckles as he sets his beer down. “You were floating on air when you were in Colombia. Even with the stress Javi was under.”

"It was our honeymoon phase." As patently absurd as that might sound to anyone else, it's true. You and Javi were as blissful in your actual relationship at that time as any other pair of soulmates could hope to be.

“He has really changed with you in his life.” Chucho admits. “I used to worry about that phone call, you know the one I mean. Knowing how easily Javi would follow someone to hell to do the right thing - in his mind - it was hard to let him live his life.” He smiles. “When you came back to him, he was determined to do things right. To be the best man he could and I think he’s done it. Not that he was ever bad but his rough edges have been smoothed out by you.”

"We did that for each other, really." Reaching over, you set your hand on Chucho's and give his a gentle squeeze. "I needed him to soften and bolster me just as much as he needed me."

He turns his hand and his smile widens when your little grunt of pain comes again. Almost silent if he wasn’t looking for it. “And soon, your family will be complete.” He murmurs.

"Just a few more weeks." Your other hand soothes over your belly, urging this to just go away. If it's the baby being active, you want her to calm down. If its Braxton Hicks contractions, you're just going to have to wait until they pass. Either way you just want to get past it.

“More like a few hours, mija” He chuckles. “You are in labor.”

"It's probably just Braxton Hicks." Saying it out loud, the thought in your head, makes you firm on the point. The best you can do is just shake your head and press on. You've had two babies, already. You would surely know if you were really in labor.

“Pains are about twelve minutes apart.” He tells you, leaning back and smirking and looking very much like his only son.

"Pops." You groan, throwing him a pout. "You've been timing me?"

He snorts. “That’s your gripe right now?” He shakes his head. “You’re perfect for my son. I will say it again.”

"It's just Braxton Hicks. I'm not going to the hospital." The warning in your voice ends up making it rise and three heads whir in your direction.

“You don’t have to go yet.” He promises, reaching out and patting your hand gently.

"Hospital?" Your mother looks up, finding Javi's eyes with worry.

Javi glances over at you and knows what you’ve been trying to deny. “She’s in labor. Has been for a few hours.” He trusts you to know your body, even if you are denying it right now. You might not want to believe it, but you wouldn’t put your baby in any risk.

It’s like hearing it from your husband cracks the dam, and the near-instant spring of tears to your eyes makes your voice waver too. “I can’t be in labor!” You sniffle, dropping your head back on the couch. “It’s Thanksgiving!”

Javi stifles a chuckle and moves over to you from the kitchen, kneeling down beside you and cupping your cheek. “It just means we will have to be extra Thankful this year, sweetheart.”

“But what if she doesn’t like pumpkin pie?” Is, probably, the silliest worry and most ridiculous sentence to ever come out of your mouth, but it’s clear that the extra emotions and hormones and worries flooding through you are in control of your thoughts at the moment.

Everyone starts to chuckle and Javi grins at you. “There’s always pecan pie.” He reminds you, kissing your hand.

“I know how stupid I sound,” you huff, laughing along with them in spite of yourself, and look back at Javi with concern. “She’s early,” you point out, concern lining your eyes. Marco Was born four days after your due date and your labor with Oscar started in the wee hours of the morning on your due date. Early is a new concept for you.

“It’ll be okay, sweetheart.” Even though that worry is one he shares, right now his job is to keep you calm. “Why don’t we go out to the hospital and make sure?”

“I haven’t even packed my hospital bag yet.” He’s right. You know he is. That especially if the baby is going to come early, you should be at the hospital and not take any chances. But you just haven’t gotten yourself ready yet. “I guess it doesn’t matter now?”

“Tell me what you want.” Your mother is abandoning the food and immediately jumping to her feet. “I’ll go pack you a bag.”

You describe the place in your closet that you keep your most comfortable clothes and are specific about the ones you want packed, also asking her to add your slippers and a few hygiene items to your yoga bag.

The onesie you’ll bring your baby girl home in is the same one her brothers were brought home in too, and having goes to get that from the laundry room once you’re on your feet. “Honey?” You stop him in his tracks, but a smile is peaking through your nerves. “Don’t forget to grab the list from the fridge.”

“I won’t forget.” He doesn’t remind you that he’s done this three times now, but he knows you are starting to panic slightly. “I’ll double check it.

“Thank you.” With a heavy sigh and a hiss of pain, you look around at your brother, sisters-in-law, and your father-in-law and half-laugh. “I guess she just really wants to meet everyone.”

“I’ll stay here with the boys.” Chucho tells you, wanting you to feel good about having to leave tonight.

“And we’ll come back first thing in the morning to keep Chucho and the boys company.” Joey promises. With his own soulmate pregnant they had booked a hotel room this year, but nothing will stop them from being on board to keep their nephews busy while Mama welcomes the newest member of the family. “In fact…” He glances at Michael, who nods. “Mickey and I are going to cook dinner. Everything we planned on and have prepped. So tomorrow when the baby’s here we can bring you Thanksgiving dinner.”

“Sounds like we’ve got everything planned.” Chucho chuckles as Javi starts cursing from upstairs. “Let me go help him with your list, mija.”

“Of course.” It wouldn’t do any good to remind them that you can still waddle upstairs — no one in this house would ever let you.

He disappears upstairs and everyone starts to move, getting things together and murmuring about what you might need at the hospital.

It's an hour before Javi is pulling the car up to the emergency room door, and by this point you're past denying that you're in labor. Your mother opted to drive her rental car behind the two of you to be with you in case a second pair of hands is needed, and you're climbing out of the car with Javi's help when she pops up on the sidewalk next to you.

“Let me get the bags.” She insists. “You get her inside, Javier.” He barely resists rolling his eyes and smirks at you slightly. “Sure thing.”

"Inherited trait." You hum under your breath, knowing that both your boys are stubborn as well.

“Don’t I know it.” He huffs, as if he’s not just as stubborn as you, maybe more so. Love and marriage, having children has taught you both to compromise a little more than you would normally, but the only place Javier will never compromise is yours and the boys’ safety and welfare. “I’ve got you.” He holds tight when another contraction hits you and you have to stop walking to concentrate on breathing.

"I can check you in." The nurse at the desk waves to Javier to get his attention.

He cuts his eyes up, his expression not exactly relieved. “Maybe after my wife finishes her contraction.” He snorts.

She smiles, polite and professional, but already has one hand on the phone to call up to Labor and Delivery as soon as she has a patient name. “Whenever you’re ready.”

Only when you sigh softly, the signal that the pain has passed, does Javier even attempt to urge you forward. “Come on sweetheart.” He chuckles. “The sooner we get to a desk, the sooner you get to ride in the wheelchair.”

“Yes please.” It will be a relief to be whisked around the hospital in a wheelchair instead of hobbling around trying to balance between contractions, and you give Javi’s hand a grateful squeeze before letting go to pull your ID and insurance card out of your purse. The nurse at the counter is sweet enough but you’re rather task oriented at the moment.

“I’ll fill out the paperwork.” Javi tells you, taking the clipboard when it’s offered. “You sit down, sweetheart.” He looks up at the nurse. “She’s six and half weeks early right now.”

“I’ll tell the L&D nurse.” Though the desk nurse betrays no concern the speed at which she picks up the phone says otherwise.

“We’ll get you up in the room, and then the doctor will tell you that everything is fine.” Javi reassures you - and himself. Babies come when they want to, not on your schedule. “Maybe you can even have a glass of wine with Thanksgiving dinner.”

“Maybe.” His demeanor being as calm as it is makes you so grateful you could cry again, but a nurse comes over with a wheelchair to get you situated and soon enough your mother is there beside you again. It is going to be alright; you tell yourself over and over. Because you’re taken care of and your little girl will be, too.

Javi is holding your hand. “You want a drink sweetheart?” He knows that if you are having the baby tonight, soon enough they will limit you to ice chips.

“Might as well, while I still can.” You’re thinking the same thing he is, and gratefully accept the water bottle he hands you. “It’ll be ice chips before too long.”

“Yes it will.” He leans in and presses his lips to your hairline. “I love you, sweetheart.”

“I love you, too.” And that, especially right now, is enough to make the difference.

******

You are definitely in labor. Javi holds your hand and reassures you through the pain. The doctor monitoring your progress for hours until suddenly everything speeds up and you are wheeled into the deliver room, Javier smocked up in a gown and gloves. He’s been present for both of the boys’ births and he’s not missing this.

It’s just after midnight when your little girl makes her squalling entrance into this bright new world, shaking her fists and blinking with wonder at all the new things to see and hear and feel.

Like the boys, Javi cuts the umbilical cord and is the first to hold his daughter when the doctor hands her to him, bringing her up to you. “Our little girl.” He chokes out with tears in his eyes from joy and relief that she seems just perfect.

“She’s perfect.” At five pounds and six ounces she’s a little on the small side, but the doctor seems satisfied that she’s healthy and was just determined to arrive early. “She really is perfect.” You have cried at the arrival of each of your babies and have absolutely no impulse to hide it, open shedding tears of joy as your little girl stares with wide eyes up into your face.

“Just like her mama.” Because of the risk of complications, only he has been allowed in the delivery room, giving you three time together. “She’s our perfect little joy.”

“Joy.” Your eyes turn up to his, barely able to tear them away from your daughter except to smile at your husband. Your soulmate. “Joy is a nice name.” But since you try to infuse their family heritage into each of your children’s names, you end up smiling wider. “Alegría. We could call her Allie for short?”

“Alegría Helena Peña.” He tried out the name and smiles softly, reaching out to caress her still wet hair. “It’s perfect”.

"I love you." Three words murmured to your soulmate when you smile up at him again, and repeated to your baby girl when you can't help but look back down at her again. "And I love you, Alegría. We both love you more than you'll ever know."

It wasn't on the list, but you don't care. The overwhelming happiness of this moment being immortalized by your baby girl's name is a perfect homage to all the unplanned things that have lead you to this point. Sometimes the best laid plans go awry, and sometimes that is exactly what fills you with love and happiness right down to your bones.

After a few more minutes, the nurses take Alegría away to do all the tests and clean her up. Javi holds your hand while other nurses help clean up the afterbirth. “It’s a good thing I got your gift early this year.” He chuckles, kissing your lips again. “I’m so damn proud of you, sweetheart.”

"I'm just glad she's healthy." It was your greatest fear and you know it was his too. Being left alone in that quiet hospital room together is almost deafening in an odd reversal of the sensation after so much commotion during Alegría's birth. "No NICU. No scary uncertainty. Just an eager little preemie who wanted to meet her whole family at once."

“Our Thanksgiving baby.” Javi smiles. “Even though her birthday won’t fall on Thanksgiving every year.”

“November 22.” All you know is that is after midnight, so it’s technically Thanksgiving Day now. “Add that to February 3 for Marco and August 15 for Oscar. Thank God they’re all well spaced out so they never have to share.”

“True.” He flashes you a grin. “Although the boys might be jealous when she gets a special dish on Thanksgiving.” He teases.

“Birthday cake is about to become a Peña Thanksgiving tradition,” you joke, knowing it could well become true.

“Baby, thank you.” His hand is holding yours again and he’s looking at you like you’ve hung the moon. Even though you are tired, sweaty and would probably say you look horrible, you are the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, right after the birth of all three of his children. “This is for you.” He offers, holding out the small velvet box he had shoved in his pocket hours earlier.

"Cariño." He has become a fan of push presents ever since first hearing about them, and while you always insist they aren't necessary when asked, it is a special kind of keepsake to have an item that reminds you of this moment. The first moments are the births of your children have all been special in their own ways, so you don't protest, but accept the box from him with a kiss. "I love you," you murmur against his lips, savoring the sensation before cracking open the box in your hand.

A beautiful three stone diamond ring winks back at you, the three baguette cut stones lying end to end in the beautifully carved band in the same metal as both your engagement band and wedding band. A third piece to complete the set like your complete set of three beautiful children. "It's beautiful."

“I figured it could be worn on the other side of your wedding band.” He explains, playing with the jewelry in question. Luckily your hands had not swollen with pregnancy like they had with Marco. “Your children represented on one side.” He murmurs softly. “And my commitment to you on the other.”

"Happily. Without hesitation." You lean over to kiss him again, wading through this feeling of exhausted euphoria for all that you can.

The doctors finish with Alegría and bring her back over to you, making Javi smile at the image when you greedily pull her close. “Do you want me to go get your mom?” He asks softly.

"Yes, please." Nodding and sniffling happily at having your daughter back in your arms, you tilt your chin up to ask for one more kiss before he goes. The new ring has settled on your finger comfortably but all of your attention is back on your little girl. "She'll text the rest of the family for us. At least the announcement is easy this time."

“No international phone calls.” He snorts, letting his lips linger on yours before he bends down more and kisses his daughter’s head. “I love you, mija.” He whispers softly, just like he had when you were carrying her. His life has been changed completely by you and the kids. For the better in every way. Javier knows joy, knows peace, and he knows that his family is the most important thing he could ever fight for. He had decided that he couldn’t let you walk out of his life a second time, and it was the best decision he had ever made.

------

Master Tags: @pixiedurango @chattychell @winter-fox-queen @lady-himbo @artsymaddie @princess76179 @paintballkid711 @missminkylove @pedrosbrat @ew-erin @sarahjkl82-blog @sharkbait77 @justanotherblonde23 @lv7867 @recklesswit @mylittlesenaar @f0rever15elf @gallowsjoker @steeevienicks @athalien @sherala007 @skvatnavle @thatpinkshirt @jaime1110 @girlimjusttryingtoreadfanfics @goodgriefitsawildworld @greeneyedblondie44 @littlemousedroid @harriedandharassed @churchill356 @ajathegreats-blog @haylzcyon   @beardsanddetectives @kirsteng42 @ladykatakuri @adancedivasmom @madiebear @tanzthompson @emilianamason @bigsdinger @xocalliexo @pedr0swh0r3 @avaleineandafryingpan @charlyrmv @avidreader73 @iceclaw101 @loveslide @elegantduckturtle @becsworld @julesonrecord @its-nebuleuse @itsrubberbisquit @mikeyswifie @guelyury @lizzie-cakes @for-a-longlongtime @vabeachazn @purplerain04 @weho2kcmo @madnessofadaydreamer

BFoW: @haileymorelikestupid @theorganasolo @missladym1981 @alexiamargot06 @southernbe @cloudroomblog @the-queen-of-sorrows

[hamletthedane]

Ah yes the “Doctor Whos” Better known as:

1. Grandpa’s TikTok Prank Channel

2. University physics professor who starts drama at the faculty meetings purely out of boredom

3. Basically, if Bea Arthur was a space alien (much beloved)

4. Exclusively the parts of Hamlet where Hamlet fucks with Polonius

5. If E.M. Forster was a super chill dorm RA who sold you weed and also REALLY wanted you to join his quantum physics department’s ultimate frisbee league

6. Law student

7. The fun dad at the church BBQ who is secretly embezzling funds from the Cheesecake Factory

8. Local Victorian dandy accidentally put his car keys in the fridge bc he was distractedly reading the Wikipedia article for bees

9. Barbieheimer back-to-back screening

10. Law student 2.0 but now he has ADHD (+ his college girlfriend broke up with him)

11. Your friend’s older brother who is super fun and runs an awesome D&D campaign but comes home a lot bc he doesn’t have many friends in college :(

12. A five hour lecture on Shakespeare’s histories that is somehow vaguely entertaining

13. Not to be a lesbian but oooooh my god oh my god ohhhh-

[+ War Doc: I challenge Steven Moffat to a fist fight behind a Waffle House at 2am]

[coven-of-genesis]

How to incorporate spirituality into your everyday life

Incorporating spirituality into everyday life can bring a sense of purpose, inner peace, and connectedness.

Here are some ways to do it:

1. **Mindfulness and Presence**: Practice being fully present in the moment. This can be through meditation, deep breathing exercises, or simply taking a moment to observe your surroundings.

2. **Gratitude Practice**: Reflect on and express gratitude for the blessings in your life. This can be done through journaling or simply taking a moment each day to acknowledge what you're thankful for.

3. **Acts of Kindness**: Perform acts of kindness towards others without expecting anything in return. This can be as simple as offering a kind word, helping someone in need, or volunteering your time.

4. **Reflective Practices**: Engage in activities like journaling, prayer, or contemplation to reflect on your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. This can help you gain insight and connect with your inner self.

5. **Connect with Nature**: Spend time in nature, appreciating its beauty and serenity. This can foster a sense of awe and wonder, helping you feel more connected to the universe.

6. **Engage in Spiritual Study**: Read books, attend lectures, or participate in discussions related to spirituality and personal growth. This can help deepen your understanding and provide new perspectives.

7. **Cultivate Compassion**: Practice compassion and empathy towards yourself and others. Understand that we all have our struggles and challenges.

8. **Set Intentions**: Begin your day with a clear intention, whether it's to be more patient, kind, or focused. This can guide your actions and help you stay aligned with your spiritual goals.

9. **Practice Forgiveness**: Let go of resentment and practice forgiveness, both towards others and yourself. This can free you from negative emotions and promote inner peace.

10. **Engage in Rituals**: Create personal rituals or routines that hold meaning for you. This could be a morning ritual, a bedtime routine, or any practice that helps you feel more grounded.

11. **Community and Connection**: Seek out like-minded individuals or groups who share your spiritual beliefs and values. Connecting with others can provide support and a sense of belonging.

12. **Live in Alignment with Your Values**: Strive to live in a way that aligns with your spiritual beliefs and values. This might involve making conscious choices about your actions, relationships, and lifestyle.

Remember that spirituality is a deeply personal journey, and what resonates with one person may be different for another. It's important to explore and find practices that feel authentic and meaningful to you.

[roosterforme]

Adult Education masterlist (Hangman x OC)

Jake ends up sitting in on a college physics lecture purely by accident. He's rewarded with a cute smile and a cheap beer when he defends the professor. But since when is he like Bradshaw, getting turned on by math and college classrooms? This story is part of the Beer Boy and Sugar universe but can be read on its own! roosterforme masterlist

Beautiful banner by @mak-32

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

Part 9

Part 10

Part 11

Part 12

Part 13

Part 14

Part 15

Part 16

Part 17

Part 18

Part 19

Part 20

Part 21

Part 22

Part 23

[perlen-gold]

(For some reasons I can't see my own reblog so here's a repost)

Just an ordinary day (angbang style)

POV: You're Melkor and you're AWESOME!

8 am: Get up.

8:10 am: Wreck the bedroom a little cause you haven't wrecked something in at least 6 hours.

8:30 am: Put sugar into Mairon's blacker-than-black coffe when he's not looking.

8:40 am: Don't listen to the report about who of your prisoners in the dungeons is still alive.

8:45 am: Listen to Mairon spitting hotter-than-boiling coffee at some poor orc and cackle.

9 am: Go to war council. Get bored quickly.

10 am: Get lectured by Mairon for falling asleep on the battle plan.

11 am: Go inspect your fortress.

11:10 am: Get bored quickly. Raise a volcano. Volcanos are fun.

11:30 am: Get lectured by Mairon for destroying half of Angband fortress.

12 pm: Lunch time. Capture some poor elves, then tell their relatives you've eaten them while they're really imprisoned in your dungeons awaiting future torture.

1 pm: Join Mairon in the forge and watch him a little. Get bored quickly cause all he's working on is a dull ring and nothing shiny.

1:20 pm: Get thrown out of the forge for hiding Mairon's forging tools.

1:30 pm: WHIP CLASS time: Teach the balrogs how to use a whip of fire like a lasso to catch wizards with it. Then get bored quickly again.

2 pm: Leave it to Gothmog to comfort the young balrog whose whip you smashed to pieces.

2:30 pm: Write prank letters to Manwë

3 pm: Write another letter to Yavanna, telling her all about the plants you've poisoned last week.

4 pm: Feed the dragons.

4:40 pm: Get lectured by Mairon for feeding the best archers in the army to the dragons.

5 pm: Think of some other terrible creature, start creating them and then leave the rest of the design to Mairon cause you got bored quickly.

5:15 pm: Get lectured by Mairon for setting lose a half-formed monster eating all the best sword-trained orcs.

5:30 pm: Send a self portrait showing yourself wearing the gleaming silmarills in your crown to Ungoliant and spray it with insectifuge.

6 pm: Tell Mairon he's beautiful in the most inaproppiate moment when he's giving a speech to your generals.

6:15 pm: Get shouted at by Mairon for being an absolute asshole.

6:20 pm: Start a huge argument just for the fun of it.

6:25 pm: Start making out heavily just when Mairon's about to desert you. Kiss him hard and kiss him good.

6:30 pm: Oh yes, you know, what your little flame needs.

6:45 pm: Stop just before things get really hot simply to annoy Mairon a little more.

7 pm: Fuck Mairon really hard on the war table cause damn, that little wicked thing knows your weakness (it's Mairon.)

7:30 pm: Call it "making sweet love" just to have Mairon at your throat again.

7:35 pm: Enjoy another round, breaking the war table for good this time.

9 pm: Hide behind a rock and watch Mairon taking a lava bath. Pelt unmelting chunks of ice at him. Listen to him cursing you.

10 pm: Take a night time stroll. Find some lost elves and tell them a bunch of lies about the other Valar.

12 pm: Time for a nightcap. Read Mairon's diary.

1 am: Go to bed.

1:01 am: Watch Mairon sleep (if he wakes, lie and tell him his snores were loud enough to reach Utumno.)

2 am: Go to sleep. Look forward to the next day cause you're Melkor and you're AWESOME.

[hp-hcs]

i love seeing lorenzo zurzolo in photo shoots and stuff because like babygirl what are you wearing

examples & silly goofy commentary below the cut!

(forewarning: i am a gay trans man who is absolutely going to fanboy over this man. if you have a problem with that, then scroll right on by)

1) douchey newsboy

why is he dressed like a gay businessman

2) yeehaw 🤠

…save a horse, ride a cowboy?

3) las vegas-core

are you about to serenade me with a cover of “feeling good” by michael bublé, sir?

4) queer-core 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

dressed like a trans guy invited to a homophobe’s wedding. next.

5) teddy bear emu hybrid 🧸

who let you out of the house

6) soundcloud rapper’s debut album cover

homeboy boutta start spittin verses

7) britney spears circa 2003

flight attendant. need i say more?

8) me playing dress up in my dad’s suits circa 2009

not the one cuffed sleeve 😭😭

9) …

smash.

10) is that seriously blue fucking adidas corduroy

what the fuck

11) a wild gay at brunch

this is just how i dress on the regular. i can’t say anything without it being a self burn.

12) pov: colonizer

girl what are you doing you european ass motherfucker

13) gay

gay.

14) … 2.0

smash.

15) can we please acknowledge the artwork of two cops kissing

okay i like the shirt but anyone who puts their keys on their belt loop automatically reminds me of every high school sophomore ever

16) 🎶SuDdEnLy SeYmOuR🎵

neville longbottom-core

17) pleasefallpleasefallpleasefall

if i saw this out in the wild, i absolutely would wish for him to fall i’m sorry 😭

18) gay 2.0

smash

19) me getting back to my dorm after a lecture:

i love the divorced dad button up ngl

[tinybitsubby]

****Disclaimer: this is not my list. (meaning I don’t like/prefer/agree with everything on it)

Several months ago I was down some rabbit hole and found a message board where someone had asked a question about having a D/s oriented vacation and people responded. I went to visit it recently and it doesn’t exist anymore. I had copied it to notes to send to the Hubz at one point and thought I’d share it here and see what you all think of it. Thoughts? Ideas? Copy and pasted below.

——————————

Someone asked a d/s chat room ideas to turn a romantic tropical vacation into a major D/s getaway for those exploring D/s.

1. Start off on the right foot. Spank her ass right before the flight or drive so it’s uncomfortable to sit during travel. Maybe tell her to sit still when she keeps shifting in her seat.

2. Tell her that unless thr public can hear, just for this trip she must always address you as sir. Punish forgetfulness.

3. Make her kneel every morning.

4. Objectify her by shoving a few fingers deep into her mouth a few times a day. Call her good girl and watch her gag for a minute then wipe her runny eyes and move on like nothing happened. My wife/sub says this type of brief degradation flips her mindset so fast. She hates it but loves the complicated emotional part.

5. Since the owiest part of anal is the initial insertion, tell her that she will be announcing every single time she’s about to get in the shower so he can come to the bathroom in a minute. When he comes in she must lube up her clean asshole and degrade herself by holding her own ass open for him. He will sink his dick all the way in and hold it there while she tells him a reason why she deserves to take his cock up her ass. If she can’t think of a good reason, the dick stays in until she does. Not fucking her, just staying in there stretching her open. Then he rinses off and leaves so she can shower. An uncomfortable size of dildo (not plug) can be used instead if he doesn’t like to get erections and then let them fade. I’m not into anal except for the very subby headspace it creates. It makes me feel so vulnerable and it’s kind of painful. We did this on a trip and it became a true exercise in submission as I got more and more sore. When he sat me down to tell me this would happen, it really set the tone for the trip. Don’t discount this idea. Also Halfway through the trip we had anal sex which is rare for us and it made every shower insertion after that more uncomfortable and really upped our D/s. Seriously, try it, especially if anal is really not her thing. She’ll feel like such a good sub. You want her to feel like a good sub for submitting in ways that are uncomfortable. Please try this! PS If she loves anal, don’t do this, hahaha. PPS. Since we got home he sometimes says tell me when you get in the shower next and I know this will happen and it reminds me of our trip when we solidified our DS.

6. Bring an implement she doesn’t like and tell her she must ask for 10 hard strokes every day by a certain time. Obviously No anger or lectures just checking it off the to-do list. If she forgets and the time passes, she gets 25 or more instead. You should know Tears are ok in the D/s dynamic. If you’re flying and don’t want to take implements then you always have a belt or a brush.

7. Spit in her mouth every time no one is looking

8. Let her know before you leave that even if she’s a very good girl, there will be tears twice on this trip to remind her of her submission. Make her ask for one of the times and surprise her with the other. You get to choose what makes her cry. Don’t overlook the power of this emotional release for a sub. This secretly also teaches her to ask for an emotional release when she feels it could be beneficial to her mental state or the relationship.

9. Tell her she cannot cum until the third day of the trip. Then have lots of sex the first two days.

10. If you are leaving town, make her dress like a total slut

11. Bruises man. Give her some really good butt bruises and then spend time every day, poking pinching and spanking them. It keeps her hyper aware of her place. A 1.5” dowel from hardware can give bruises in just a handful of strikes without chaffing the skin too much like stingy implements do because they take too many strikes to get a bruise.

12. Tell her that on this trip, if she has an alcoholic drink in her hand, there will also be a plug in her ass. No exceptions. Going to order a drink with lunch? Go plug that ass before we leave. For added fun, you pick the size each time. Alternatively, if that’s not possible, you could just tell her that whenever your dick is going in her pussy on this trip, there will also be a plug in her ass at the same time. Or alternate days.

13. She’s doesn’t get to orgasm on this trip.

14. Tell her she will kneel and suck your balls every time you change clothes. “Sorry, you have to come back to the room with me because I’m changing into my bathing suit.”

15. Make her stay naked every minute you’re alone.

16. Call her trashy names.

17. Whatever you want to do to Dom her, whatever your desire or fantasy is, do that. BUT, tell her in detail hours in advance. A sub’s brain goes haywire when told something like this. “Look at me. Tomorrow I’m going to spank you very hard and you’re going to hold very still. I’m going to cum when I’m done but how I cum is going to depend on how well you take your spanking. If you can stay still I’ll just sink into your cunt and that will be that. But if I have to keep telling you to get back into position or keep your feet down I’ll cum down your throat and if I have to wrestle you at all during your spanking, I’m fucking your ass and continuing to spank it.” Or just tell casually with a smile you know after dinner I’m going to fuck your face and slap it hard every time you need to pause to breathe. Etc.

18. I’m jealous. I want a D/s vacation! Just stuff holes all the time. Anytime you think of it, put your fingers, dick or toy into one of her holes for minute. Let her know her body will be invaded over and over on the trip multiple times a day and occasionally during the night. Make sure you tell her to expect it because then her mind will be on it all the time.

19. Flirt with other women and make her sit quietly and smile. Maybe kiss one.

20. Fig her. Especially if you can’t spank because of noise. At least 20 minutes, the heat doesn’t peak until 15. If you’re flying and can’t take ginger, China Gel on your thumb is almost as good.

21. Bind her and make her wait patiently while totally bored. If rope is a travel issue, take some medical tape.

22. Get her pregnant

23. Clothespins. Use them a lot. Is she sucking your dick, put them on her labia. Are you fucking her, put them on her nipples. Are you spanking her, put a row of several down the skin of her tummy or back on her labia. They keep her on edge and feeling subby. I’m not kidding try them because the ache when they are removed is like nothing else. If she’s sunning by the pool, maybe there’s one hidden somewhere for a while.

24. Just fucking Dom her, use the time to make your own D/s dreams come true. She wants you to take control.

25. Fuck man this list is great but maybe only pick a few.

26. Give her a daily writing assignment if you have relaxing time. Give her a question that is hard to talk about and demand honesty. Better yet, both of you share.

27. Tell her she can’t say no on this trip. Goes without saying, but respect hard limits.

28. Make her wear dresses with no panties. Pull it up every time no one is looking. Smack her pussy, or finger fuck her or sit back and admire. Just mix it up. Fuck her before you go somewhere so she has to feel jizz running down her legs.

29. Make her skip a meal now and then to watch you eat

30. Randomly tell her to head back to the room and masterbate to orgasm. Or to only get really close to it. Give her a time limit.

31. Choke her out. Maybe she wakes up in a compromising position.

32. If she’ll be wearing bathing suits, only spank or strap her on one side. She’ll be miserable with all the counts on only one side and if anything should show, it will just look like she took a tumble or something with a bruise or welt on just one side. It’s the symmetry that lets people know what’s up.

33. If there’s a need for a punishment spanking on the trip, do it in diaper position. It’s intense because you can see her face. Make sure you’re ready to handle seeing her face during a punishment as some Doms just can’t handle it.

34. Tell her you won’t be touching her vag once on the trip. Her other holes will be used as you see fit daily. You can put a binder clip on her labia to hold it closed to prove your point.

35. Carve a souvenir scar into her.

36. Tell anytime she wants to cum she’ll have to pick between two things she doesn’t like first. Get her close to orgasm so she’s really needy and then say I want you to come but first A or B. If she doesn’t pick in 10 seconds, she gets both then back to the orgasm.

37. Pick a window of time each day that she cannot speak

38. Tell her she must wake you up with her mouth every day.

39. Take medical gloves and do cold inspections of her. Make her feel like an object.

40. No eye contact for the trip.

41. Dude just tell her this trip will be rough. Rough sex, rough spanking, rough manhandling. Just make things challenging for her and then get through them together. That’s all we subs want. We want to endure a hard challenge for you and then be called a good girl for enduring it. You get to be the guy setting up whatever challenge turns you on AND be the support system when it’s emotional for her. That’s all of D/s!!!

42. Edge her. You can do it or she can, but lots of random edging to keep her needy all day.

43. Golden showers.

44. Make all decisions for her. Tell her when to get up, when to sleep, when to use the bathroom, what to wear, order her foodand drinks without consulting her. Tell her when sex is happening and what type. If it’s too much, just pick one day where she can’t make a decision.

45. If you’ve never slapped her face, start on this trip. Maybe just a couple times at first and then build up to several times in a row during some form of sex. Require eye contact. Let her tear up and let her go through the range of emotions. While looking at you and enduring it, let her feel your support, but then slap her again. As a submissive this is for real an emotional growth as a couple and can be meaningful. Talk to her about it the next day. Tell her she’s so good for taking it in and you’re going to slap her again soon.

46. Spank her very hard right before the trip so the little spankings here and there actually hurt quickly. Wipe tears and give hugs. This hard and soft feedback at the same time feeds a sub like you wouldn’t believe.

47. Don’t let her sleep in pajamas. Always nude. She’ll get used to it.

48. Force too much Alcohol/weed into her and then discuss both of your darkest fantasies.

49. Slap that pussy every chance you get. Keep it just a little sore.

[aoioozora]

Simon.

Part 5

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13

Character: Simon Riley / Ghost

Content: Biker! Ghost x Fem! Reader, strangers to lovers, fluff, civilian au

Note: Enjoy Simon being a gentleman in this part 😉. I can't find a nice pic to post here so maybe I'll skip that. Anyway, just wanted to let y'all know that in this fic, reader is 25 years old and Simon is 28.

“I hate to sail on this rotten tub, leave her Johnny, leave- oi, ye cannae be serious. Take off that mask!”

Johnny's singing was interrupted by Simon, who was just entering his living room, dressed and ready to leave to meet ____. He looked at the agitated Johnny, who was now sitting up straight on the couch. 

“What d'you mean?” Simon asked, pretending not to have understood or heard his friend. 

“The maaask. Take it off,” Johnny ordered, gesticulating wildly, “Why'd ye want tae wear it if ye showed yer face to her already?”

Simon rolled his eyes, now taking off the mask, making Johnny smile. He settled back on the couch comfortably. “That's more like it. Oh, also… Catch.” Johnny stuffed his hand in his pocket and threw something at Simon, which he caught. 

It was a condom. 

“Johnny! I don't fucking need this!” Simon roared, throwing back the contraceptive, which hit his friend in the face and fell on his lap. 

“Ye don't? So yer gonna rrrrrawdog her then, are ye, ye animal?” Johnny smirked, clearly trying to annoy Simon, especially by rolling his r's more than usual.

“Johnny…” Simon's voice lowered to a threatening growl. 

The room thundered with Johnny's laughter; having known Simon too long, he wasn't threatened by him, but he relented regardless, not wanting him to be in a bad mood before meeting his crush. “Okay, okay, if ye have nae use for a condom, I have something better for ye.” He beckoned his friend to sit with him on the couch. 

“This better be good.” Simon narrowed his eyes, noting a mischievous glint in his best friend's eyes as he sat down. 

“She's an author, yeah? Those book lassies will love this. I'll tell ye.” 

In the meantime, Simon's crush found herself in front of her mirror getting dolled up by her best friend, Lindsey, who turned the bathroom into a university lecture hall. 

“Tell you what, babe,” said she as she very lightly brushed some blush on her friend's cheeks, “Boys will never make the first move, yeah? So you have to openly flirt with them, right? You literally have to hold up a sign at them telling them you're interested.” 

____ tried to chuckle, but Lindsey lightly slapped her shoulder. “Don't move yet,” she ordered, throwing her long, curly red hair over her shoulder. 

Lindsey finished up the simple, natural looking makeup look and spritzed some setting spray on her friend's face. ____ still didn't dare move, because Lindsey was checking for any mistakes, scanning with her big green eyes. A bit of an odd thing to do, especially after putting the setting spray. 

“Lovely!” she exclaimed, slamming down the can of setting spray on the bathroom counter, “Now you can move.” 

While ____ admired herself and Lindsey's makeup skills in the mirror, Lindsey watched, her smile slowly disappearing; her shoulders slumped slightly as she moved behind her friend, giving her a worried look in the mirror. 

“What's wrong, Linny?” she asked, noticing the look. 

“This Simon guy… Is he really good?” Lindsey whispered, lightly squeezing the other's shoulders while glancing at the phone on the bathroom counter. “He's not like the other guy, right?” 

____’s brows furrowed slightly. She placed her hand over Lindsey's and squeezed it. “Don't worry, Simon's nice, and we're actually a lot closer in age, if that's what worries you.” 

Lindsey was relieved about the smaller age gap, but didn't look completely convinced. She said, “He's nice so far. You do know that a crush is a lack of information, right?” 

The only infuriating thing about Lindsey was how she could get a little too realistic. 

____ sighed. “Linny, that's the whole reason why I'm going to hang out with him: to find out if he's better than nice.”

Lindsey huffed, but nodded anyway. “Okay, but if anything happens, you know who to call.” 

“You worry too much.” 

“Because you're literally so hopeless when it comes to men.” Lindsey let out a chuckle as she lovingly wrapped her arms around her friend's neck and gave her a back hug. ____ leaned into it, grateful for the concern of her ever worrying friend. 

It was soon time to leave. The two ladies headed downstairs to the entrance of the building, where ____ was to wait for Simon to pick her up. Since Lindsey had other plans, she couldn't wait with her friend, and had to go. 

And so did ____ wait by herself, watching the cars go by on the glistening, wet streets. The night air was cold from an earlier rain, and the jacket in her hands seemed to be calling her to wear it and feel warm. 

“I hope he won't find it weird if I wear his jacket,” she thought as she put the garment on after much mental debate. The warmth immediately silenced her thoughts, and she just decided to enjoy it while it lasted. 

Before long, Simon pulled up to the entrance, but the pillion was occupied by an unfamiliar man with a cheeky smile and a short, dark brown mohawk. As he got off, he whispered something to Simon and then turned around. The man grinned at the waiting lady and then walked off. She, confused, returned the gesture with a little smile of her own and then walked up to Simon. 

“Who was that?” she asked as soon as she was near the motorcycle. 

“Don't mind him. He's my friend, Johnny. I had to drop him off around here since he had some stuff to do, so…” he shrugged. “Were you waiting long?” 

She smiled. “Not at all. I came out just five minutes ago.” 

“Brilliant,” he said with a nod and then took notice of her outfit. “You're wearing my jacket,” he observed, sounding amused. 

She noticed his cheeks going up from behind his mask; a smile. “Uh, yeah,” she answered, blushing a little, “I'm sorry, I felt a little cold so I put it on.” 

“No worries.” His voice mellowed as he stared at her, taking in the sight of her in his jacket, “Keep it on. You look good in it.” 

“Thanks,” she grinned, now taking hold of his shoulder as she got up on the pillion. 

Johnny was in the distance, watching the two with wide smiles. He even managed to secretly snap a few photos of them as they talked so that he could tease Simon with it later. 

“Hey you! Delete that picture right now!” a high pitched voice ordered behind Johnny, making him flinch in surprise. 

He immediately turned around, but saw nobody. But when he looked down, he saw a little lady in front of him, arms crossed and staring at him with furrowed brows. 

Johnny, for a moment, was taken in by her beauty. Her pale face was dotted with red freckles, more intense on her cheeks, and her hair was a deep red like the color of the setting sun, loosely coiled like curled satin ribbons. Her flashing eyes were a light green, the color of grass reflecting evening sunlight.

It took a moment for him to regain himself, and when he did, he cleared his throat, saying, “Lassie, that's my friend there,” he answered, pointing to Simon, “I'm gonna tease him with this photo. I'm no’ gonna delete it.” 

“And that girl with him is my friend,” she declared, “And I don't really trust that guy she's going out with today.” 

Johnny wasn't sure what prompted her to say that, but his eyebrows rose with intrigue anyway.

“Small world,” he remarked and then put forward a proposal with a wide grin, “Tell ye wit, wee lassie, we can dae something together. Let's both stalk them. Ye get to see my lad Simon in a good light, and I get to take some candids of them, yeah? Wit dae ye think?” He opened both his hands out to her and batted his eyelids, hoping she would accept. 

“No!” she exclaimed, crossing her arms, “It's not good to stalk.” 

Johnny groaned. “But dinnae ye want tae see if Simon is good for yer best friend? This is a win-win situation! I can show ye all his good points!” 

“You're only saying that because you're his friend,” she challenged. 

“No, no, listen here lassie,” he waved his hand, now meeting her eye, “I've known Simon since we were wee lads. I know everything about him, and I can assure ye that he's good. Let him have a chance, won't ye?”

The little lady paused. Was she going to trust him? While she wanted her friend to be happy, she didn't want to sabotage her friend's chances with her crush because of her incessant worrying. 

Johnny could see her mental debate and smirked at how funny her thoughtful face looked; it was a sneer with furrowed brows, while her fingers tapped over her crossed arms. She eventually relented. 

“Perfect! Now we go stalk them.” He held out his hand to her. “By the way, I'm John, or Johnny.”

She cautiously took his hand and shook it, answering, “Lindsey.” 

Simon and ____ already reached the restaurant they decided to have dinner in. He led her to a quieter part of the establishment where they could chat in peace, and just as she was about to pull out her chair to sit, he held out his hand to stop her. 

“Allow me,” he smiled and pulled out the chair for her. 

Her face glowed with joy and excitement at this display of chivalry as she sat down. Her reaction made him smirk to himself, mentally thanking Johnny for this important tip. 

“You're such a gentleman,” she praised, smiling widely as she watched him take his seat opposite to her, “I know we're in the age of the strong, independent woman, but wow, it's actually really nice to be treated like this.”

Her blushes were encouragement enough, and he smiled. 

“Thank you, I try,” he bragged. “Do you normally like this sort of thing? Or do you like it from me?” he asked with a chuckle, leaning forward and resting his elbows on the table. 

She laughed, not yet willing to admit that she liked it especially from him. She answered, “I like it generally. It’s just nice to know that someone is thoughtful enough to do a gesture like that, you know? Even though it was the standard back in the day.”

Simon took mental note of that. 

Any further conversation was interrupted when a waiter brought them two menus and glasses of water. While the two pored over the laminated card to decide what to get, the lady was momentarily distracted by the sight of the man in front of her. 

He wore a black button up shirt, the sleeves of which were rolled up his thick forearm, the rest of it tightening around his flexed biceps; the unbuttoned collar displayed his neck and a metal chain underneath, which made her wonder what was dangling at the end of it. He wore blue chinos, and black sneakers. It was the best casual outfit he could put together with Johnny's help. 

The outfit, in addition to his handsome, unobscured face was a treat to sore eyes. She couldn't help but allow her eye to linger on the curious scar on his cheek, and to wonder about the cause of it. 

Simon noticed her gaze and he met her eyes with a cheeky smile. “You're staring,” he told her. 

One corner of her lip tugged upwards in a sheepish smirk. “I was just thinking your outfit looks really nice.” 

“Thank you, I try,” he echoed his earlier line with a smirk and a proud shrug, but really, he would've been hopeless without Johnny giving him such meticulous advice on the basic rules of dressing well. “You look nice too,” he decided to turn the tables on her, “Especially wearing that.” He pointed at his jacket that she was still wearing. 

She blushed at that. “I can't take it off. It's nice and toasty in here.” 

“I don't mind you wearing it for the rest of the evening, so long as you give it back later. It's my favourite.” 

She grinned. “I'll take good care of it.” 

The waiter came by again, and the two placed an order for a 12 inch pizza to share and some drinks.

Small talk was made, until it led to the topic of her novel. 

“I only just finished reading Firefly Trails a couple days ago and I must say that you're a brilliant author,” Simon praised, “I could not have expected a plot twist when Adelheid was betrayed by Elystran just to get a hold of the magical fireflies.”

The lady snorted proudly and jokingly patted herself on the back. “You can count on me to make a good plot twist.” 

“No, but seriously. I really didn't see it coming,” Simon leaned forward slightly with eagerness twinkling in his dark eyes, “You see a friend betraying someone all the time in the media, yeah? But this one was so unexpected, especially when Elystran stole the bottle of captive fireflies from Adelheid. It's really awful how he had no remorse in potentially letting her die without a cure for her disease, just so he could save the kingdom he was going to rule. He was a very convincing actor.”

She found herself gazing at him as he went on with his long winded speech about Elystran, the anti-hero of her novel, who pretended to be Adelheid's close ally. It was heartwarming to her to see his enthusiasm for her work, but she also wondered if he resonated with Elystran in some way. 

Simon's pale face was a little pink with exertion after the speech and he finally sat back, tugging at his collar and flapping his shirt. “A bit hot in here, innit?” he asked. 

“The air con is working just fine. I think it's because of your passionate speech that you're feeling so hot,” she said with a grin. 

Simon's pink face turned a hint more pink at the observation. He was usually reserved with people he knew a little less, but he hadn't realised how passionate and talkative he had gotten about a fictional character. He could attest this to the fact that she wrote so well as to stir his normally taciturn feelings. Art never stirred his soul, but if hers did, he was damned. 

He nodded, admitting, “Well, it was because you write so well. Anyone who doesn't talk so passionately about it is missing a few bolts.”

The high regard in the compliment made her giggle. She rested her chin on her hand and looked teasingly at him, saying, “So, you told me that you're getting more into reading thanks to Firefly Trails.” 

“I never wanted to be a reader, but it's all your fault now that you're turning me into one.” Simon unconsciously mirrored her as he smirked, returning her look with his playful sarcasm.

“I'm honored,” she grinned at him, “Do you want recommendations for more books?” 

Simon pulled out his phone and opened the notes app. He handed the phone to her. “Fill my cup, darling.”

A wide smile graced her face as she excitedly snatched the phone and started typing away her list of recommended books. Simon watched her with wonder, smiling at her enthusiasm. He was truly interested in reading now, thanks to her, and to see her so excited about suggesting him more made him feel loved, in a way. 

And the love of a woman was truly something different, even if it was just platonic. 

He sighed as he stared at her, at how focused she was on typing out the list. When he thought of it, he couldn't really remember if he had a normal friendship with anyone of the opposite sex before, all thanks to his unhappy, troubled youth. 

“By the way, Simon,” she called, now lifting her eyes from his phone, only to be met with his thoughtful thousand yard stare directed at her.

“Simonnnn, can you hear me?” she called again, snapping a finger in his face. 

“Huh?” he blinked. “Oh, fuck. Sorry, I was just thinking of something.” 

“It's alright,” she smiled, wondering what his stare meant. She asked, “I was wondering why you call me darling and love so often.” 

His eyes rolled off elsewhere as he tried to think of an answer that wouldn't give away what he felt for her. “Well,” he began, voice quivering slightly, “It's just something I call the women in my life, yeah? Female friends and maybe family members. I think it’s also a British thing.” He shrugged. 

It was only the partial truth. 

“Hmm. I see,” she nodded, her eyes still glued to the phone. As she moved her hand to get a sip of the water, her finger accidentally swiped to the home screen of his phone, and she couldn't figure out where to go back to the notes app. The little mishap allowed her to take notice of his phone background, which was a closeup photo of a German Shepherd looking directly at the camera with its large, inquisitive eyes. She gave him his phone back, asking him to help her get back to the notes app. 

“I just happened to see your home screen. Is that dog yours?” she asked as he gave the phone back to her, now displaying the notes app. 

“My uncle's.”

“He's beautiful. What's his name?” she questioned, now getting back to typing out the book list. 

“It's a female. Her name’s Riley.”

“Riley! Like your surname?” 

“Yeah. I found her starved and thrown in a dumpster as a puppy, and I called my uncle to help me get her out. He adopted her and named her after me,” he said with a chuckle. 

She smiled as she finished typing out the list and handed the phone back to him. “That's really nice, and really strange too, because my ex has a female German Shepherd named Riley too.”

Simon raised a brow as he took the phone and glanced at the list before keeping the device aside. “Chalk that off as a coincidence. I guess many people have German Shepherds named Riley. The name is quite common… I think,” he said. But the mention of the ex intrigued him. “You mentioned your ex. So, you've dated before, then?” he asked directly but casually, hoping he wasn't being too nosy. 

She shrugged. “Yeah, one guy.” 

“What happened with your ex, if you don't mind me asking?”

He saw that she stiffened slightly and looked away for a moment, clearly looking uncomfortable. He was so close to backing off when she answered him, “Well…” she paused to suck in a sharp breath through her teeth, “He was an older guy, and I happened to keep bumping into him at my local grocery store.”

He raised a brow, first of all at the fact that she dated someone older, and second of all, she met him at the grocery store, the least romantic place to find a boyfriend. But he didn't say anything and listened anyway. 

“The first time we met, he mistook me for an employee and asked me where he could find the dog food,” she chuckled, “He was new to the area and didn't know where to find it in the grocery store, and I was also wearing something similar to the uniform of the store employees.”

“So you two hit it off then?” 

“Yeah, after that, we'd have small talk, and he was actually quite charming. He asked me out on a date, we liked each other, and then we dated for two months.”

“Hm, that's not very long, innit?” he murmured, “How old were both of you?” 

“I was nineteen and he was thirty-five.” 

“Holy fuck,” his eyes widened slightly, “Nineteen? That's really young.” He then paused to count, “And you guys had a sixteen year age gap.”

Her cheeks warmed with embarrassment. “Yeah, I know, it's crazy.” 

“You prefer older blokes then?” asked Simon, fiddling with his fingers as he leaned forward on the table, hoping she would refute it. 

“Well no, but I was…” she sighed, “I was trying to figure out what sort of man I liked.” 

“And your first choice was an older man,” he thought to himself, but didn't say it out loud. “Wasn't that potentially dangerous though? Sure, you weren't a minor, but you were still young.” 

She sighed again, but heavier this time. “Yeah, it kind of messed me up a little.” 

“It did? How?” 

She told him about how he could get a little demanding when it came to spending time with him, as she was a budding author at the time, and was busy with writing a good piece that was worth publishing. 

“Of course, even though I was busy, I tried my best to spend time with him. But he just wasn't satisfied. And since I lived at the dorm in uni, I had a curfew, but he would disregard it completely and beg me to stay and spend the night with him, when I wasn't comfortable with it yet. Thanks to that, just being around him ramped up my anxiety, and our relationship that was once enjoyable wasn't anymore.”

Simon felt tempted to ask if she had done anything intimate with her ex, but bit back, not wanting to come off as rude and intrusive. He listened with narrowed eyes and keen earnestness. “And so you broke up then?” he asked. 

“Yeah, and it surprisingly went well. Both of us mutually agreed that the relationship wouldn't work out, and we parted ways.” She paused for a long time and Simon didn't break her spell of silence, sensing a struggle in her to say the next words. She finally continued, “I thought that that was the end of it, but lately he's been calling me again, asking me if we could get back together.” 

Simon raised a brow again. “What? How daft is he? He has no shame groveling back to you.”

“Yeah… I spoke to him once to clearly tell him I wasn't interested anymore, but I don't think he understands.” 

As if on cue, her phone started ringing. When she checked who was calling, she recognized the unsaved number immediately, having seen it several times. Her eyebrows furrowed slightly, feeling the same old anxious feeling rise from her chest to constrict her throat. “It's him,” she said, her voice quivering. 

Simon held out his hand. “I'll speak to him.” 

“Are you sure?” she asked frantically. 

“I'm sure. Give it here before he cuts it,” he urged. 

She hastily placed the ringing phone in his hand and he immediately picked it up. 

“Hello, mate. ____’s boyfriend here. What do you want with my missus?” he asked calmly. 

There was a brief silence. 

“Simon?” asked the deep, rumbling, yet gentle voice on the other side. 

The colour drained from Simon's face as he recognized the voice he knew and loved. 

“Uncle John?” 

Plot twist?

End of Part 5.

Part 6

-

I'm making a taglist btw. Leave a comment if you want to be included!

[allthedoorsareopennow]

Incomplete collection of Marius lore

suggestions for additions are welcome, but it MUST HAVE A SOURCE

overview 

He is the ship’s medic[1]/ship’s doctor[3], plays fiddle and has a mechanised right arm[1].

The ace of hearts card in his hat indicates he is asexual [18].

'He likes love, and love songs, and people in love' [18].

His own romantic inclination is unknown [18].

He knows some German words, but is not fluent [19].

backstory 

He is neither a baron nor a doctor[3][5]; ‘Baron’ is a corruption of his original name, Byron von Raum[2][5].

Marius has a sister called Dorothea, and they were raised by a single nonbinary parent. Marius doesn’t remember their name or face, and knows them only as Zeze[6].

It is strongly implied that Marius was not mechanised by Dr Carmilla [7].

Marius is 5’5 and very skinny. This is apparently because he came from a world that is ‘somewhat medieval in its nutrition levels’ and Marius was not a healthy child. [14]

He piloted a mecha called KISMET. She was 5-6 storeys tall and slightly insectoid, like a dragonfly or butterfly. [17]

‘The control pod’s entirely in the head, which allows the internal control rig to right itself like a ball bearing, keeping the pilot upright whether she’s standing on the ground, hovering, flying horizontally, banking sharply or even rolling.’ [17]

The mecha is not meelee-oriented. [17]

time with the mechanisms 

Drumbot Brian said that ‘given that we're immortal and don't need a doctor, it's the job we're most comfortable giving Marius, and it keeps him busy’ and also that he ‘frequently tries to psychoanalyze inanimate objects’ [5]

His mechanism was ‘probably botched’ and he has a ‘tenuous grasp on reality’[2] 

According to Jonny, he grew a beard presumably around 08/02/2014 ‘almost instantaneously, and without warning’ and was apparently ‘very upset’ and ‘said he’d been holding it in for decades and just that momentary lapse of concentration as I kneecapped him had ruined all his hard work’[8]

He once dressed up as the Toy Soldier for a halloween concert [9]

Drumbot Brian once responded to someone asking how the mechanisms were by describing marius as ‘mad’[10]

The Aurora describes Marius as ‘the broken doctor’ [16]

songs/albums

He had a planned lecture on the psyche of the olympians, but this was cancelled[11]

He helped Ashes install at a minimum the camera in Ulysses’ vault in UDAD, though he does not remember this[4]

Apparently, ‘Marius spent his time on Fort Galfridian sitting at the porthole for days staring into the sun because he didn't realise it was supposed to be unbearable, and now the Ghouls think he's some sort of prophet’ [12]

In The Bifrost Incident, Marius does not know where he got the violin - in fact, he doesn’t even realise he’s holding it until Lyf points it out [15]

death

Marius was always skeptical of the crew’s immortality and was less surprised to meet his end. ‘One day, at something of a loose end, he will decide to check on the octokittens. Unfortunately, the purring horde has not been fed in many decades, and devours him, head to toe, in 11.7 seconds.’ [13]

Jonny is implied to have already witnessed Marius’ death before the final concert; he says ‘11.7 seconds. At least, by my watch.’ [13]

In Marius’ death, tunes from ‘Blood and Whiskey’ and ‘Favoured Son’ can be heard [13].

[1] Mechanisms Marius von Raum Available at: https://themechanisms.com/the-crew/marius-von-raum/ Last accessed: 11/01/24

[2] Young (2020) Future Projects: The Death of Byron von Raum (spoiler free) Available at: https://kofiyoung.com/2020/07/25/future-projects-the-death-of-byron-von-raum-spoiler-free/ Last accessed: 11/01/24

[3] Revenge of Spaceport Mahon

[4] Mechanisms Eskhatos Available at: https://themechanisms.com/fiction/eskhatos/ Last accessed: 11/01/24

[5] Below (2013) Why do immortals need a ship doctor? Available at:  https://www.tumblr.com/the-mechanisms/58736308596/why-do-immortals-need-a-ship-doctor-i-need-an Last accessed: 11/01/24

[6] Young (2023) Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/neitherabaron/727612334921678848/holding-checklist-titled-qualities-to-kill Last accessed: 11/01/24

[7] Rasputina (2013) Where'd you folks pick up Marius and Raphiella? Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/the-mechanisms/58960694562/whered-you-folks-pick-up-marius-and-raphiella Last accessed: 11/01/24

[8] Sims (2014) Ingratitude Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/the-mechanisms/75995731661/ingratitude Last accessed: 11/01/24

[9] wickedacephotos (2013) The Mechanisms at The Cellar, 29 Oct 2013, for Halloween with Polar Patterns Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/wickedacephotos/65528149745/wickedacephotos-the-mechanisms-at-the-cellar Last accessed: 11/01/24

[10] Below (2013) Hooray for questions! Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/the-mechanisms/58734952128/i-apologize-that-i-didnt-ask-a-question-to-make Last accessed: 12/01/24

[11] The Mechanisms Ulysses Dies at Dawn Available at: https://themechanisms.bandcamp.com/album/ulysses-dies-at-dawn Last accessed: 12/01/24

[12] thedreadvampy (2020) Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/thedreadvampy/624522490768736256/i-feel-like-i-should-clarify-because-it-does-at Last accessed: 12/01/24

[13] The Mechanisms (2020) Death to the Mechanisms Available at: https://themechanisms.bandcamp.com/album/death-to-the-mechanisms Last accessed: 12/01/24

[14] thedreadvampy (2020) Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/thedreadvampy/630817295229468672/so-i-am-absolutely-going-to-go-draw-tim-with Last accessed: 12/01/24

[15] thedreadvampy (2020) Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/thedreadvampy/631436135234699264/you-dont-need-to-awnser-this-because-i-am-lore Last accessed: 12/01/24

[16] themechanisms A Bedtime Story Available at: https://themechanisms.com/fiction/ghost-in-the-machine/ Last accessed: 06/03/24

[17] Young (2023) Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/neitherabaron/708247931183153152 Last accessed: 11/04/24

[18] Young (2024) Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/neitherabaron/754005393719640064 Last accessed: 22/06/24

[19] Young (2024) Available at: https://www.tumblr.com/neitherabaron/759338848830554112 Last accessed: 20/08/24

To do:

not yet added Marius’ dttm dialogue

may add more detail to what is contained in expert testimony

could probably add detail on things seen doing in photos, e.g. Marius playing rock paper scissors with TS. (are photoshoots canon? I assume so)

[3] missing a link

wow did I really miss pilchard. I will Get To It at some point maybe

fungus arm https://www.tumblr.com/neitherabaron/712149115253948416/

perhaps more backstory info from byron

https://x.com/neitherabaron/status/1231124594544783361?s=20

https://x.com/neitherabaron/status/1231604579529302018?s=20

numbers are ordered mostly in when I added the source rather than order of appearance as I have moved things around a lot. as above this is very incomplete and I don’t have the willpower to update this now maybe I will later. I’m just uploading it now since someone wanted marius lore

[danieyells]

care to spoil any interesting dialogue Haku has when you reach higher affinity levels? Would love to know!

Haku's so. . .normal, it's kinda cute? Lol. But yeah I'm pretty down for that! I wanted to share one of these things but held my tongue lolol but since you're asking here're some of the ones that were more interesting or otherwise appealing to me!

I've amended this post to be all of Haku's home screen lines. Enjoy!

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"Oh, finally here, huh? I'm not really ready for you yet though... Ha ha. Wait over there for me, would you?"

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"Oh, looks like you've got a letter. If you don't open it soon, I might sneak a peek."

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"How's the search for clues about your curse going? Don't put too much pressure on yourself. If you ever want to talk, I'm happy to listen."

"Most people in Hotarubi have something they put their heart and soul into. That doesn't really work for me though. I lose interest in things way too easily."

"What are you doing here? Don't tell me you've gotten yourself mixed up in something again."

this is a very funny one to have him say when i use the sinostra casino as my home screen bg

"Haha. Don't expect too much from me. Ghouls are just glorified street magicians, really. Let's keep it light, huh?"

'glorified street magicians' is a hell of a way to describe. . .a lot of the stigmas we've got going here lmao

"Boo! Ha ha, didn't think you'd get that scared. I was just getting rid of the shadow imp that was sticking to your back... I'm kidding! There was nothing there, I promise."

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"...So, how about we take a walk? This dorm's seen better days, so it's tough work checking all the places that need repairs."

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"You've adjusted to life at Darkwick pretty well, haven't you? Not that anomalies and missions are something you'd want to get used to..."

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Today doesn't really work for me... I'm going to be getting back to the dorm pretty late, so can we do tomorrow instead?"

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"...Hate to be the one to tell you this, but there's something untoward lingering behind you. Don't look! Hah, I was just kidding. It was just a little dust, see?"

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Twilight has been a lot quieter than usual today... I hope that's not a bad sign."

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Subaru's just too nice. Keeping all the eccentrics in Hotarubi in check's gotta be rough."

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Everyone here comes from different backgrounds and has different gifts. There's no reason you should feel out of place."

'we're all unique, including the most ordinary among us.' good lesson!

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Looks we're going to make it through today without any disasters. At least I hope so."

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"What are you doing out here? You shouldn't walk around at night with your guard down. Don't come crying to me if you get possessed by a fox spirit, you hear?"

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Your parents ever tell you ghosts would get you if you don't go to bed? For some reason Zenji's the only one who gets spooked when I say that..."

after the reveal that zenji is a ghost this is so funny actually I LOVE THAT ZENJI IS A GHOST WHO'S AFRAID OF GHOSTS AND THE DARK.

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"All these geniuses and their lectures are giving me heartburn. Wouldn't mind hearing the woes of someone long-suffering instead every once in a while."

(this sounds cruel but from what i can tell in Japanese he says he'd rather hear stories about hard workers/people who struggled from the bottom than prodigies. Basically he's more interested in, y'know, ordinary folks than people who're really special.)

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"That video I took of Zenji today? I'm just going to do some quick editing and post it. I don't know why he doesn't just focus on content that's more his style..."

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I saw Tohma a little while ago. Been a while since we last had a real chat. Sounds like he's got his hands full, as always."

so i initially left this one out of this post because i didn't think much of it but. . .the way Haku regards Tohma is so much more casual than Tohma regards Haku in retrospect, it seems. To Haku, Tohma's just the usual hard worker. Someone he'd actually enjoy having a conversation with. But Tohma speaks to Haku almost as if with suspicion or disdain. . .then again he speaks kind of coldly to Jin too. Maybe that's just how he is with people he kind of knows or views as more on his level. Or it's something more sinister. Who knows.

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"Mornin'. You've got a sleep mark on your face. Yeah, right there. Good to know you got a good night's rest."

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"You haven't collected all the papers that were supposed to be submitted by today's deadline yet? Who are you waiting on? Got it. I'll go get them for you."

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I don't mean to scare you, but... be careful with your right leg. Especially when you're in the main building."

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Getting cold feet when you try to jump into the deep end is just proof you're a normal human being. We're the crazy ones."

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Can't sleep? In that case, let's go for a little walk. There's actually something I want to talk to you about."

pretty high affinity to be having chats on night walks. . .i wonder what he wanted to talk about.

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Just having someone you care about at your side is all you really need... Ha ha. That was a little out of character, huh? My bad."

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"Oh, you're awake. I was just about to make some tea to wake myself up. Want some?"

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"It's not very often I get to kick back like this in the middle of the day. Maybe I'll take a nap."

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"None of us wanted to become like this. Living an ordinary life, and dying an ordinary death— why go after more than that?"

He just wants to be normal. And he can't. It's kinda tragic lol

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"(Yawn) Oh, didn't see you there. Haha... Guess I've been letting my sleep debt build up. I'm going to bed."

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Being cursed really sucks, huh? You can't help but ask yourself, "Why me?" all the time, even when you know it's a question with no answer."

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"I know I'm being selfish— but sometimes, I wish you'd just forget about me..."

WHY. . .ARE YOU THE SUS ONE AND YOU FEEL BAD THAT YOU'LL BETRAY THEM? DO YOU JUST FEEL LIKE YOU'RE TOO LUCKY HAVING HAD FALLEN FOR SOMEONE NORMAL WHEN YOU KNOW YOU'RE NOT NORMAL ANYMORE? DO YOU FEEL LIKE THE PC DESERVES SOMEONE NORMAL AND TO BE ABLE TO GO BACK TO A NORMAL LIFE BUT BEING WITH YOU GUARANTEES THEY WON'T? WHY DO YOU WANT THEM TO FORGET YOU. . .he's so interesting to me simply because of how much he tries to keep himself apart from his being a ghoul(and, y'know, seeing spirits and shit--) so he can try and just be any other guy. . .and he can't lol his surroundings, who and what he is, he can't go back to being normal! It's a charming way to have a boy next door sort of personality i think lol

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"I've been noticing more birds in the garden lately. Is that a bush warbler? A white-eye, maybe? A lot going on during spring in Hotarubi."

Boy knows his birbs.

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Heading into another nice, warm afternoon. Maybe I should take a nap...? Oops, nearly forgot I promised Zenji I'd film him."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Must be nice being a ghost—no hayfever, and no hangovers. Spring really is the embodiment of human weakness."

How drunk did you get last night buddy. . . .

(between 8pm and 5am)

"My family home is pretty famous in our area for its cherry blossoms... When I was a kid, my friends and I used to go exploring through them at night."

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"It's so humid... Days like this make me miss Frostheim..."

He's former Frostheim! Maybe that's why he and Tohma seem to have some history. There's also Jin's friend who left that Tohma helped to switch houses. . .but Haku was a second year then so would he have needed it?

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Today, I've got to go round and check the stalls for the festival Hotarubi is holding— wouldn't want any dangerous charlatans sneaking their way in."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Zenji's off roaming around somewhere again... People are more sensitive this time year, so I wish he'd just stay put..."

AGAIN, BEFORE WE LEARNED HE WAS A GHOST I READ THIS AND THOUGHT PEOPLE HE MEANT LIKE. . .SENSITIVE EMOTIONALLY TO NOISE AND ZENJI'S BIWA PLAYING. I DID NOT REALIZE THAT HE WAS WORRIED PEOPLE WOULD REALIZE ZENJI WAS THERE.

(between 8pm and 5am)

"You're not going to wear a yukata? Eh, I just thought it'd be cute to see. That's the kind of thing guys think about, don't know what else to tell you."

It reads like he's a little disappointed the girl he's into friends with isn't gonna wear something he thinks is cute lol

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"They say fall is the season of the arts, but I'm a really mediocre flute player. I'm about as uncultured as you can get."

funny thing for an ex-frostheimer to say.

(between 11am and 4pm)

"You can hear the biwa, right? He's been going for three hours now. People are going to start getting pissed off, so I'll go tell him to stop soon."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Nightfall can catch you unaware this time of year. It'll be dark soon, so let me know when you're planning to head home. I'll walk you back to the cathedral."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"It's a stunner of a night. Maybe I'll grab a drink and do a little moon gazing."

don't drink too much you're trying to quit smoking, the solution isn't to replace it with another addiction--

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"You'll catch a cold dressed like that. It's already pretty chilly out there, you know... Here, take my coat."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Winter rain really chills you to the bone. Sorry, walking through the garden must be rough for you this time of year. Come a little closer."

I'm a bit of a sucker for huddling together in the cold lol

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"It's cold again today. Now that I think of it, Subaru said he wanted to make hotpot with everyone. Guess I'll go grab some things and make it happen."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Your hands hurt because of the cold? Let me see. Oh yeah, your fingertips are all red. Here, stick them in my pockets."

Is that your flute in your pocket or are you completely unaffected by the cold

His birthday: (July 26th)

"Wait, you got me a birthday present? You're so conscientious. Oh, I didn't mean it in a bad way. Thanks, I appreciate it."

Your birthday:

"Hey, come over here a sec. Here. It's nothing special, but I got you a something. Today's your birthday, right?"

why is this worded like he's asking you to come into a shady alley in secret to give you a birthday gift lmao

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year. I know it's a cliché, but I hope this year's a good one for you."

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"Whoa, chocolate? I didn't think you'd give them to me too. Guess I better think of something good to get you in return."

White Day: (March 14th)

"Here, for the chocolate you got me last month. I wasn't sure what you'd like, so I got the ones I remember you said were good."

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"A bunch of spirits have been following you around all day, are you okay? Psych, just kidding. Seriously, I was joking, I swear."

Halloween: (October 31st)

"Looks like you've had your fair share of tricks today. I'll narrow down your options and just make it a treat, then."

Christmas: (December 25th)

"You look like you're having fun. Do you have a present for me, Little Miss Santa? Haha, I'm just kidding. Here you go. Merry Christmas."

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"...Hey, you alive? Not much point me just standing here waiting around. Guess I'll take off."

(13 affinity and above)

"I know I look like a slacker, but I do have stuff to do. Guess I'll nap till she gets back."

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"Hey there, stranger. Everyone's missed you, you know. ...Even I was starting to get a little worried."

Those're the ones that're most interesting to me I think! 'u' there are some that aren't up there though, like some of the ones that show him being responsible and worrying about his teammates haha. Hope you don't mind my little commentary here and there!

A while later and I've amended this post to include all of the home screen voicelines, not just the ones that appealed to me most in that moment! Haku's interesting in how. . .normal he is. Aside from the seeing spirits and things anyway lmao. He's just a casual flirt who wants to escape the abnormality that his becoming a ghoul got him. I feel like his lines don't really reveal anything about him. . .but also 19 in particular feels. . .a little lonely? Maybe because of how he had to leave Frostheim, he doesn't really feel as connected to the Hotarubi ghouls yet, compared to how he was with Jin before? Or, if he is the spy, he feels like all of his relationships are fake. . .and man that 'I wish you'd just forget about me' line is sad but also SO SUSPICIOUS. WHO SAYS THAT IF THEY DON'T PLAN ON LEAVING YOU OR STABBING YOU IN THE BACK.

[fiveisnumber1]

Timeless - Five Hargreeves X Reader

Main story parts:

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37

A/N: Hi Everyone, sorry it took so long to put this chapter out. I swear I really tried to get it done sooner, but without going into too much detail, let's just say I got majorly hit by the Author's Curse. It wasn't easy but I finally am in a place where I was able to finish this chapter and I have already written some of the next one. Let's just hope I don't have a repeat of last time. Hope you enjoy and if you can please leave a comment that would be so cool! They make my day and really help to motivate me!

____________________________________________________________

Pt 38 - Don't (Let Me) Go

Light pushed through the silent darkness that surrounded you, the brightness slowly increasing as time went on. You could hear a ringing in your head, and as you opened your eyes to look for the origin of the sound, light flooded into your receptors causing you to wince at the intensity. You shut your eyes tightly once again and turned your head to the side trying to avoid the piercing light directly above you. Slowly, you could feel the rest of your senses begin to kick in. You were lying down somewhere and as your fingers slightly moved back and forth you could tell that you were on a carpeted floor. You felt like there was a layer of sweat covering your skin. Your mouth felt extremely dry like you hadn't had water in days and all you could hear was the buzzing of what you assumed to be the light source above you. Carefully, you opened your eyes, wincing at the light once more before allowing your cloudy vision to focus as best as it could. The world was bright and still a bit blurry, but you could make out the room enough to realize you were back in Kenny's basement.

You were confused. How the hell did you get back here? You shut your eyes again trying to force yourself to remember what happened last night but everything was a jumbled mess and it hurt to think.

You moved your head slightly in an effort to look around more but the slightest movement made you feel like you were moving through jello. Just slightly out of arms reach you could see Dean lying on the floor as well.

"Dean..." You groggily called

However, he did not move.

"Marks..." You called slightly louder

Still nothing.

You knew what you had to do. With all the energy you could muster you rolled yourself from your back onto your stomach. A wave of nausea washed over you, but you somehow managed to stop it. Now within reach of him, you slid your arm over and placed your hand on his forehead before smacking it repeatedly.

"Ah!" He shouted as he quickly sat up "Estoy despierto!"

You did not move your head to look at him and instead just opted to use your peripheral vision as best as you could. You could see as he lifted his hand to his forehead to hold it. You couldn't tell if it was from a headache like yours or because you had just repeatedly hit it. Dean looked around the room confused before turning his attention to you on the ground.

"Oh, you don't look good." He commented

"I'll be fine..." You replied still slightly disoriented "What did we do last night?"

"What didn't we do?" Dean stated back "I can't even remember everything."

"That's- not comforting..." You responded

Seeing that you were not getting the answers you wanted from Dean, you knew that you would have to start asking around to piece together the puzzle, but there was no way you were going to get an idea of what happened last night from your spot on the floor. However, the thought of getting up felt like a Herculean task given your condition. You had never gone as far as you did last night. Honestly, you should've listened to that alcohol and drug lecture you got back in freshman year, no matter how lame they were. They were correct when they rhymed Drinking lots is really bad, it makes your head and tummy sad. Your head and tummy were very upset right now. If only you had some water, then you could force it through your system with your powers and wipe a lot of your discomfort away. If only you didn't have to get up to accomplish that.

Wait.

You didn't.

Through your tired and headache-filled haze, an idea came to mind. All you had to do was roll on your back once more, open your mouth, and use your powers to collect the water molecules in the air close enough to create a physical stream of water.

You were a genius.

Gathering your physical energy once more you rolled yourself back onto your back. The basement lights above shined into your eyes once more, but you did your best not to focus on it and instead focus on the task at hand. Looking up you concentrated on the water molecules in the air and began to bring them together. Quickly, the molecules pooled together becoming an orb that floated in the air. The ceiling lights shone through the water and reflected the light into brilliant rays. If it weren't for your thirst you may have considered staring at the growing water ball longer. When the orb looked sizable enough, you opened your mouth, and let the water begin to fall.

Unfortunately, you realized too little too late that your genius idea was actually incredibly stupid as the orb of water fell from the air and down onto your face. Your open mouth caught a good portion of the water, but instead of swallowing it as you had planned, you began to choke as you somehow managed to drown yourself. The shock of it all sent a jolt through your system causing you to sit upright and let the water still stuck in your throat spill out onto the floor. With most of the water either on the floor or swallowed into your system you began to gasp loudly for air as you tried to settle yourself back down. At least you were sitting up now. As you began to catch your breath, you heard as a voice asked,

"Did you just waterboard yourself?"

Your head slowly turned your head left toward the voice and saw Bren sitting against the wall. His expression was still tired mixed with some shock. You furrowed your eyebrows in annoyance as you attempted to shout between gasps,

"N-no!"

Rather than replying, he just raised one eyebrow curiously most definitely implying he did not believe you.

"Shut up!" You shouted, finally regaining your ability to speak "I didn't mean to!"

"Shhh..." Viktoria shushed, waving her hand at you "You're too loud."

"Sorry..." You whispered

Finally taking a look around the room you could see the rest of your friends in some state of alertness although some look worse for wear than others. Dean and Bren seemed tired but not in pain, Lucas and Addison seemed like they had light sensitivity but nothing some ibuprofen couldn't help with, but Viktoria looked like she was gonna need a stronger concoction of remedies to get better. As people began to move around you considered actually getting up to get water, but before you could you were greeted with the cheerful yet loud voice of Kenny exclaiming,

"GOOD MORNING KRUSTY CREW!"

"SHHHH!" Viktoria emphasized louder

"Oh shush yourself, Vi. I've got home remedies and medicine to fix you all up." Kenny replied matter-of-factly

Ah yes, of course, the part-time EMT and full-time party king himself would know exactly how to help you all. You watched from where you sat on the floor as Kenny, who seemed completely unaffected from the night before, passed out items from a tray to each of your friends. Coffee for Dean and Bren. Extra-strength migraine medicine and Gatorade for Lucas and Addison, and the prior plus saltines for Viktoria. And then lastly there was you. You watched as Kenny walked over to you and reached down to hand you a giant glass of water. As he did so though he noticed the remnants of water that soaked your top half.

"What happened?" He questioned confused

"I'm far stupider when my head hurts." You replied annoyed "Please just give me the water so I can fix myself."

"Makes sense," Kenny commented as he handed you the water

Chugging the water he had handed you, you finally managed to set out what you wanted to do with your original plan. Getting the water into your system, you used your powers to move it about your body helping you to start feeling better. It was an incredibly weird feeling when you messed with only some of the molecules inside your body, but it was better than being nauseous and in pain. And truly, a recovery that took two minutes of being uncomfortable was far better than one that took two hours.

Soon enough, the searing pain in your head and the unease in your stomach both managed to subside allowing you to focus on more important matters. Like drying yourself off for one. Using your abilities to collect the water molecules in your shirt, you distributed them back into the world, ridding yourself of the evidence of your mistake. which finally led you back to your original plan, FINDING OUT WHAT HAPPENED LAST NIGHT.

Finally feeling confident in your ability to stand, you got up from where you sat on the floor, moved to the center of the room, and looked around at your friends. There were markings on each of your friends' left wrists wrapped in clear bandaging that conjured hazy memories of a weird biker bar. Looking down at your left wrist, you saw it was also marked with a symbol of your own. The memories became clearer as you recalled your conversation with Pogo and how you drew the image for him to tattoo. Looking at the tattoo once more you noticed that it seemed to already have healed over. Of course, it had. Your scars never stayed. At least not the physical ones.

That wasn't important though. As you pulled your clear bandage off your wrist you went back to looking at your friends. Things at first seemed ordinary even with the blacked-out gaps in your memory. But then things became odd. Bren had what looked like a streak of black paint on the side of his neck and Addison was wearing a diamond ring on her ring finger.

"Bren, how did you get paint on your neck?" You asked

"Probably got it when we graffitied that stupid banner last night." He replied, looking up from his coffee

You looked at him blankly. You had no recollection of that whatsoever. What banner would the two of you hate enough to even do that, anyway?

"Right." You responded, attempting to hide your lack of remembrance

After responding, however, you quickly looked over toward Addison who was snuggled up next to Lucas on one of the basement's couches.

"And where did you get your ring again, Addi? It's just so lovely." You asked feigning ignorance

"Oh, Lucas found it in a ring box in the bathroom of the club we went to and proposed to me with it." She answered, happily showing it off

"Yeah, and I finally got to use my Certificate of Ordination to marry them when we went to City Hall." Kenny chimed in

"Of course. How could I forget." You replied, still trying to hide that, in fact, you did NOT remember

There were vague memories of someone referencing City Hall when you were at the bar Pogo worked at, but besides that, you had no clue what happened there. Looking over towards Dean you could see that he had a smirk on his face. Locking his eyes with yours, you could hear as he said in your head,

You don't remember shit, do you?

You scowled slightly as you replied in his head,

Shut it. Just tell me what else happened. I already feel stupid enough from the accidental waterboarding...

His smirk turned into a smile as he explained,

Beyond breaking into City Hall so Lucas and Addison could get married? You helped Lucas forge adoption papers so Luther and Sloane Hargreeves are now his legal parents.

You thought to yourself for a moment before stating,

That does like something I would do.

Externally Dean gave you a nod before adding in your head,

Although, you should ask Viktoria where the fanfiction she printed for you is. She ran out like three government printers to put it all into these huge ass binders.

Your eyes went wide for a moment as you questioned,

Binders?

Oh yeah, at least two to my knowledge.

You gave Dean one more look before carefully turning toward Viktoria who was slowly going between eating saltines and sipping on some orange Gatorade on the other couch in the basement. Taking a few steps closer to her you softly began to say,

"Hey Viktoria, about those binders you put together yesterday-"

"Spider-Man fics are in the red binder. They're mainly Amazing Spider-Man focused but some are just general Spider-Man. However, In A Matter of Time fics, are in the blue binder and are sorted by who they're about." Viktoria replied matter-of-factly in between sips of her drink

Well...you did say you wanted to read some of those stories. Viktoria knew the types of tropes you liked and she read everything from the best of works to the worst of it all so at least you knew you were going to get the good stuff.

"Cool. Where are they?" You asked, still hiding the fact that you forgot about this too

"In the black bag over there?" Viktoria stated, pointing in the general direction of the far wall

Walking over to the wall you saw not one, but two, black bags resting against the wall. They were both relatively similar in appearance so you weren't sure which one she was referencing.

"Which bag is it?" you inquired, gesturing to the two bags

"I don't know, the left one?" She shrugged

Taking her word you walked over to the bag on the floor to the left. Crouching down, you opened the zipper on the top of the bag but instead of finding the aforementioned binders you were instead met with the sight of a large sum of cash, all in perfectly banded stacks. You paused, confused at the unexpected sight before you.

"Did you find the papers?" Dean asked

"Not the type that I expected to be in here." You replied

"What do you mean?" Viktoria questioned

"These aren't binders. This is cash." You stated, turning around to show the group "And a lot of it."

"Oh, that's my bag!" Kenny exclaimed, "Viktoria's is the one on the right."

Everyone slowly turned to look at Kenny. Confusion and concern running across all of your faces but his.

"Kenny, why do you have stacks on stacks in that bag?" Bren interrogated

"Oh, because I took it when we were at City Hall," Kenny stated nonchalantly

the jaws of you and your friends dropped as you looked at him. He seemed to not have a care in the world about what he had done. This was bad. Not apocalypse bad, but still, pretty fucking bad.

"You stole thousands of dollars from the government?!" You exclaimed

"The world is in chaos why would the government care?" Kenny explained

"IT'S MONEY!" You shouted, "THEY CARE ABOUT THIS SHIT MORE THAN HUMAN LIFE!"

Kenny paused for a moment, somehow only now realizing the severity of what he had done.

"Ah fuck...you right." He stated

"Hey, hey, calm down," Bren interjected "I'm pretty sure I managed to turn off their security system though."

Turing your attention from Kenny, you looked at Bren and questioned,

"How sure?"

"Like 75 maybe 85 percent sure." He answered

"That's pretty good." Lucas tried to encourage

"That's not a hundred," Dean replied

"So what? We can't leave this basement until the world ends?" Viktoria questioned

A silence fell over the group. You looked at each other waiting for someone to say something but no words came. Was Viktoria right? Was this it? Were you all stuck here in Kenny's basement for the short, but foreseeable future?

No. You couldn't let that happen. If the world was ending you were doing whatever you could to fill the time. You weren't going to become like the rest of the world hiding themselves away from the inevitable. You wouldn't let the dread of the end creep into you all. If you were going out, it was going to be together, as a group, on your terms. You refused to let the world take this from you.

"No, we can. We just need to keep a very low profile." You spoke up

Your friends turned their attention to you. There was confusion amongst the group, but that notable spark of hope in their eyes. There were a plethora of things you could count on your friends for. Friendship, support, humor, connection, loyalty, etc. But the most important one was hope. It was their hope that kept you going when things were tough just like it was your hope that kept them going during their dark days. You were a family. You loved each other. And when it came to wanting the best for each other no expense was paid to giving out hope to one another.

The apocalypse wasn't your fault, but it was your doing that they were aware of it. If there was anything you could give them now it was hope. Looking back at them you stood up straighter, and with confidence in your voice you explained,

"Like Kenny said, the world is in chaos, people are disappearing, and they might not put as much effort into looking for us as they would under normal circumstances."

Slowly but surely, there were nods of agreement at the statement. They made sense and if you were so confident in that fact then they should be too.

"Still, we should find a new place to lay low these next few days." Dean added, "God forbid, it's that 15-25 percent that Bren isn't sure, they'll probably still come checking our homes just to say they tried."

"Okay, but what place is going to take in seven strange kids no questions asked?" Addison commented

There was quiet chatter amongst the group about where you all could go to lay low. However, the confident look on your face dropped contorting into a grimace as you already knew where would be best suited to hide out. You did not want to take your friends there, especially with who were already staying there, but deep down you knew it was best.

"What's that look for, sis?" Dean questioned

"I know a place..." You sighed

"And you're sure they won't ask questions?" Addison pressed

"Positive." You explained, "The same guy has been working the front desk since at least the sixties and didn't ask why I haven't aged a day after 56 years."

"Well, I don't know about you guys but that works for me," Kenny stated

Everyone else seemed to either nod their head or mumble some type of agreeing statement to the idea. In your mind, it wasn't ideal but you knew it was your best bet.

"Alright then, everyone grab your important shit, shove it in my car, and let's go." Dean said

With Dean's declaration, your scattered friends started to get up and gather their things. Some more slowly than others. You felt a twinge of sadness as you looked around Kenny's basement. This place was your main hangout spot and it was filled with memories. You had hoped you could come back to this place each day, but just like many other places in your life, you had to move on. What was safest was best. There wasn't all that much to grab since most peoples' items were back at their respective houses, but soon enough everyone had gathered their sentimental stuff and gathered by the basement stairs ready to go. As you all began to make your way up the stairs, and to the front door you could hear Kenny exclaim behind you all,

"Wait!"

Everyone stopped on their own specific stair, except for Lucas who had already made it to the main floor landing and looked back at Kenny.

"What's wrong?" Bren inquired

"My tumbly's grumbly." Kenny replied

"Oh! I can make us eggs before we go." Lucas suggested

"No!" The rest of the group interjected

Lucas looked down the stairs at you all, his head tilted to the side in confusion at all of your reactions.

"Uh- no thank you, Lucas." You said, in a more polite tone "We'll get breakfast on the way."

With a quick shrug of his shoulders, Lucas smiled at the rest of you as he replied,

"Okay!"

And as he walked off toward the front door the rest of you looked down at Kenny who still stood at the bottom of the stairs, all giving him an annoyed glare.

"I don't know why you all are mad at me. You said no too." Kenny complained

Letting out a little sigh, you, like everyone else, continued up the stairs and out to Dean's car. With everyone piled in Dean pulled away from Kenny's house and drove off. After a quick stop at a diner, where you ordered and ate breakfast food besides eggs, you got back in the car and directed Dean to drive to the Hotel Obsidian, telling him it was mostly a straight shot down the road with one left turn after 20 blocks.

With that explanation though, Dean's sense of caution seemed to dissipate as he whipped out of his parking spot at the diner and floored it down the road. Weaving between the abandoned cars and ignoring most traffic lights, it seemed as if Dean had forgotten the speed limit, that there would still be some other cars on the road, and thatyou were trying to lay low. You could hear the sound of the song Tokyo Drift playing in his head as you sped down the semi-apocalyptic streets. You took a look at your friends in the backseat, most of them seemed at least slightly entertained except for Viktoria who was starting to look green. You were almost at the hotel though, so you hoped she could at least hold out til you got there to possibly spill her guts. As you approached the left turn to arrive at the hotel, Dean quickly spun the wheel left causing the car to do a few donuts in the intersection. You let him enjoy his fun for a few rotations as Bren and Kenny encouraged him from the back seat, but with Viktoria's condition seemingly worsening you decided to hit his arm suggesting he get a move on.

Finally making the left turn, Dean slowed down slightly as he pulled up into the front drive of the hotel. You all stepped outside of the car, leaving most of your items with you before having Dean lock everything up. You did however wonder why Kenny felt the need to bring his medbag with him, it's not like anything major was going to happen at the hotel. Nevertheless, you made your way, with your friends, toward one of the front revolving doors as you all collectively tried to push your way through in the same turn.

"Will you- god- back up, Kenny," Bren complained

"Dean, your elbow's in my ribs," Lucas stated

"Okay, we didn't all-" Addison began to criticize

"Move forward!" Dean shouted as he pushed the group

After a moment, the seven of you finally made it through the door and to the other side of the entrance. Spreading out to give each other space, you mentioned

"You know there were two doors, right?"

"Thank you, girl who can go through walls. That's some great insight coming from the person who didn't have to use the door with us, but did anyway." Addison remarked

Your mouth fell into an awkward frown as your eyes moved to look toward the floor. Sometimes you got so wrapped up in what was going on that you forgot your powers were even an option. It was a rare occurrence, but it still happened from time to time. However, being reminded that you forgot about your innate abilities made you feel a bit stupid.

"Okay, you're right, but you don't have to be mean about it..." You responded slightly embarrassed

As you dealt with recovering from your faux pas, however, your friends looked about the place they were now going to be staying in the meantime. However, any excited curiosity slowly began to fade as they took everything in. The sub-par hotel was noticeably old. From the furniture, to the lighting fixtures, to the carpet itself nothing looked like it was from this century. It barely looked like it belonged to the last one. The other people who inhabited the hotel were also an odd mix. Your friends tried not to make eye contact with them even as some of them quietly stared at the group.

"This place looks lame as fuck." Dean commented

"It smells like my Grandma's house," Kenny added

"(Y/N), why are we here?" Lucas asked disappointed

"Lucas you know why we're here. I have connections here, along with the Academy crew staying here as well." You explained, "I brought you all here so you'd be safe."

Lucas nodded his head at your response but then you could see as his eyes widened. A revelation came to his mind as you mentioned that the Academy was also staying here.

"Oh my god." Lucas said in a low tone, "I might get to tell Luther he's my dad now."

"Gonna be honest, looking at this place I'd rather take my chances with the government finding us," Bren remarked

You could see as the rest of your friends looked around at each other. No one was replying to Bren's statement, you could tell that they were thinking about it. Except Lucas of course who was too preoccupied with the thought of actually getting a new father.

"Listen, I know it's not great. But it's safer." You added reassuringly, "And I promise we will have a good time. Charlie and I found many ways to make this place at least a little fun."

There was a slight hesitancy, but after a moment you could see your friends become less tense about the situation. Their shoulders relaxed and their postures became more casual. It wasn't ideal but you were going to make this work for you all. As you looked about your group of friends though, you noticed that there were only 5 out of the 6 standing around the lobby.

"Where's Viktoria?" You asked concerned

"Right there," Bren replied pointing behind you

Turning around you saw your petite friend leaning over a small trash can looking as if she was about to puke. Poor Viktoria, her stomach upset so easily. Granted, you couldn't blame her given the events of last night and Dean's driving right after eating. You watched as she looked over toward your group, her head close to resting on the rim of the can. Between the paleness of her skin and the tired look in her eyes, you could tell that she did not feel well.

"Why don't you drive a little more recklessly next time, huh Dean?" Viktoria ridiculed, sickness evident in her tone

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm the safest driver I know." Dean replied, "We're all here in one piece are we not?"

Viktoria shot Dean a dirty look, but quickly after a wave of nausea washed over her causing her to turn her face back toward the opening of the trash can. Fortunately, she faced the can just in time as seconds later a stream of bile came from her mouth. There was a mix of grossed-out grimaces and sympathetic looks on the faces of you and your friends while other guests of the hotel looked on in disgust. As Addison rushed over to Viktoria's side you turned to look at the rude patrons staring at your friend.

"Mind your business!" You shouted, your eyes angrily flaring up

The prying eyes of other guests quickly averted themselves as you returned to normal and turned back to your group. Now kneeling next to Viktoria, Addison gently ran a hand up and down her back trying to ease her discomfort. With a sympathetic smile, Addison cooed,

"C'mon Vi, let's see if they have some old pretzels or something behind the bar to help your stomach."

Kenny quickly perked up at the word bar as he excitedly looked around the lobby once more. He had missed it the first time, but off to the side, there was a fully stocked bar with no one attending it. A wide smile came to his face as he ran off toward it cheering,

"It's unmanned! That means it's free!"

As quick as Kenny started running though, Bren took off after him.

"KENNY! NO!" He shouted, pulling out one of his whips to try and grab onto him

As Bren chased Kenny toward the bar, you looked back at the scene in front of you. Addison was trying hard to get Viktoria to get up so they could walk over to the bar and hopefully help her feel better. However, her efforts were futile as Viktoria's body refused to let her leave from her kneeling position.

"I can't move..." Viktoria groaned as Addison tried to lift her once more

Letting out a defeated sigh, Addison called out,

"Lucas! Come help me carry Viktoria."

"Oh uh- yeah," Lucas answered coming out of his thoughts, "Sure thing, babe,"

Walking over to where Addison was Lucas lifted Viktoria off the ground with ease. He was a very strong boy and lifting someone small like Viktoria was a piece of cake for him.

"Don't worry Sonata, I got you." Lucas comforted as he picked Viktoria up

He waited for a moment for Addison as she picked up the trash can and continued to hold it close to Viktoria's head. Once she was ready the two of them slowly made their way over to the bar to not disturb Viktoria's stomach more. And then there were two. You looked over at the rest of your friends by the bar before turning to Dean and saying,

"Well if everyone else is over there we might as well too,"

"You can go. However, I have to piss." Dean replied

"I told you not to drink four glasses of orange juice." You reminded

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just point me to the nearest bathroom." Dean remarked

Rolling your eyes, you pointed toward the back of the lobby toward the elevators.

"Off to the side of the elevators, there is a hallway. Down at the end of the hall is a communal bathroom. There are stalls, showers, and baths so don't be surprised if you see anyone in just a towel." You explained before commenting, "Or less."

"Do you know that from experience or...?" Dean questioned

"Not my experience. Charlie's." You answered, "I always showered at the Academy."

"Alright. Well, I'll meet you back at the bar with everyone else." Dean replied

With that, Dean gave you a short nod as he walked off toward the bathrooms and you began to head toward the rest of your friends. As you made your way over to the bar, you noticed Viktoria's phone on the ground. It must've fallen out of her pocket as Lucas had carried her. Picking it up, you took it with you. She'd probably want it back when she was feeling better, but given you hadn't used a smartphone in four years you felt very compelled to use hers. As you approached, the bar you called out to Viktoria,

"Vi, I found your phone. Can I use it?"

Viktoria, however, didn't look or talk back. Instead, you could see her give a shaky thumbs up. And with that approval, you sat down on the bar top, surrounded by your chaotic friends, and unlocked her phone to scroll social media.

Unbeknownst to you though, just across the lobby, the rest of the Umbrella Academy were gathering together as well. One by one, the members of the Hargreeves family had found all of themselves standing near the elevators asking each other what had happened to them recently. But as a silence fell over the group, a vortex of blue opened beside them spitting out Lila and Five onto the carpet of the hotel. Luther, Viktor, Allison, and Diego all jumped back in shock as they watched as the two of them collided with a travel magazine stand, smashing it to pieces. Five and Lila groaned from where they lay on the ground, surrounded by magazines and broken wood.

Rolling onto his back, Five could feel his head spinning. Through his eyes, he could make out the figures of his siblings, but it seemed like each of them had two extra duplicates.

"Shit." He muttered to himself

Sitting up, Five pushed himself to stand, but as he got on his feet he could feel his legs wobble beneath him as the world spun a little more. His mind was racing and yet he couldn't think straight.

"Where have you been?" Viktor questioned

"Facing my mortality, Viktor. I don't recommend it." Five replied as he began to regain his balance

With the world around him a little more stable, Five fixed his jacket and brushed the dust of the wooden stand off his suit. Regaining his composure, he now tried to regain his train of thought. It seemed like every time he time traveled it always seemed to screw with his head a bit. He didn't know if it was the act of traveling through time or the fact that he only ever did it under duress that made his mind get disorganized. Either way, it didn't help especially with so much on the line. As he focused more on the important things at hand, his focus was interrupted by Allison aggressively remarking,

"You had the briefcase? We've been looking for this!"

"Well, look no further. That's the last one on Earth." Five replied

Five watched as she knelt next to the case and took it into her hands. Examining it closer, it was obvious the thing was broken. Between the dents, scratches, and billows of smoke coming off of it, there was no way it was going to work again.

"Or was the last one." Five added

Allison scoffed, tossing the briefcase down to the ground in frustration before getting up and walking away to sit on a nearby staircase. With Allison off to the side, Five went over to the briefcase to inspect it. He didn't think it was workable, but given everything it didn't hurt to check. With one glance though, it was evident that the case was broken beyond repair.

"Yeah, that's toast." Five said aloud

As Five stepped away from the briefcase and began to finally collect his thoughts, Lila rushed towards Diego and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him into an embrace.

"You're happy to see me. What's wrong?" Diego asked

"Turns out there's less time to hold grudges than I had planned. You're off the hook." Lila explained before asking, "Hey, where's Stan?"

Even with the idle chatter in the background between his family members, Five was able to gather his thoughts. The world was ending. He knew that. It was because of a Kugelblitz that it was ending. He learned that. Another version of himself created the commission and also died. He witnessed that. You, his girlfriend, were in danger of also dying. He discovered that. None of these thoughts were good, and they needed to be resolved fast. Calling the attention of those around, Five announced,

"Hey, Chatty Cathys, quit the chitchat, all right? I'm calling a family meeting here."

Hearing that, Lila attempted to walk away from the group but was stopped by Diego who held her wrist and said,

"Ah, ah, ah. That means you too."

With his mind fully in focus, and the things he needed to address listed out in his head, Five looked around at the group that stood before him, but as he glanced at each individual he noticed a very important one was missing.

"Where's (Y/N)?" Five asked the group

Besides Lila, who was with Five the whole time, the rest of the group looked around at each other for an answer. Their eyes met each other as shoulders were shrugged and uncertain mumbles filled the air. No one seemed to know where you were.

Concern bubbled up within Five. How could they not know where you were? You were with the group of them when he had left. How did they not see you? Terrible thoughts started to flood Five's mind as he thought of the possibilities of what could've happened to you. What if you were kidnapped by the Sparrows? What if a kugel wave blitzed you? Or worse, overwhelmed your powers and killed you? What if he was too late and you were already gone? In their conversation, his other self told him that he shouldn't have left here, that his time was running out. Was this what he meant?

"Where is my girlfriend?" Five harshly emphasized

Uncomfortable looks spread on the faces of the Hargreeves siblings as they stayed silent. Their silence though began to push Five into a spiral. His body tensed and frustration flooded his face as he looked at his siblings. There was one more thing about him that only Lila managed to notice. Panic. There was panic in his eyes even if his expression was angry.

His panic however was a cause of concern for Lila. Five had already stated that if he didn't have you, he would end the world himself. And if anyone besides Viktor has a reason to do it, it would be him. Lila didn't care about you appearing because she liked you, but more so because she had things she needed to do and Five ending the world would get in the way of that. And whether she liked it or not, if there was one person Diego cared about besides her, it was you. So he had to be the one to know where you were.

"Diego, where's (Y/N)?" Lila asked

"Uh, I mean she has to be here somewhere, right?" Diego responded

That was not the answer Lila wanted to hear. Hoping that with a little pressure Diego would remember, Lila pressed,

"Well, she's your sister so shouldn't you know where she is?"

"No, I've been busy with Stan," Diego replied

"Of course you fucking have." Five snapped from across the group

Five's comment didn't register with Diego though as out of the corner of his eye he saw Stan walk by with an armful of chemicals. Not really thinking about the issue at hand and instead wondering what Stan was up to, Diego announced,

"I'll be right back."

"Don't leave me with your- Dieg-" Lila called but it was useless as he had already walked away

Five's frustration began to boil over as Diego walked away to follow Stan. Diego, who still continuously criticized him for even breathing in your direction, apparently couldn't care less that you were missing. Only a few days ago, if you were missing he would've gone nuclear, but now it seemed that didn't matter. What a fucking hypocrite. With his emotions continuing to build up, Five faced the rest of the group, but with a crowd of blank stares looking back Five couldn't help but shout,

"SOMEONE BETTER TELL ME WHERE MY FUCKING GIRLFRIEND IS NOW."

"I know where she is." A voice called out

Hearing those words a sense of relief washed over the entire group. Thank god, someone knew where you were because none of them did. However, after that moment of relief, they realized the voice was not familiar to them. Everyone's head quickly turned toward the voice only to be met with a teenage boy who had a similar resemblance to Diego. To Luther and Allison, there was something familiar about him, but Viktor and Lila had no clue who this kid was.

"Who's the mini Diego?" Viktor asked

"Y'know Viktor, I take offense to that, but seeing as we've never met before I'll let it slide." He responded

Viktor looked toward his siblings only to be met with more shrugs from Allison and Luther. But the look on Five's face was a different story. Five knew who this person was, but it didn't make sense why he'd be here.

"Dean?" Five questioned confused

Dean smiled. Not only because Five recognized him but because he was back and that was going to be such a relief for you. After he apologized for leaving in the first place, of course. Walking over to Five, he placed a hand on his shoulder as he greeted,

"Hey, Five! Great to see you. Sorry to hear about the black hole consuming all of existence, I know you tried really hard to stop that."

"A black hole is destroying existence?!" Allison exclaimed angrily

"It's called a Kugelblitz." Five replied flatly as he attempted to process what was going on

Lila looked at the teenage boy standing in front of Five. Who was this kid? And why did he look like a younger version of her boyfriend? Obviously, he wasn't a younger version because Five addressed him as Dean, but that didn't make it any less confusing. And even more so, he knew about the Kugelblitz. Lila thought the only two people who knew were her and Five. Trying to learn more, Lila questioned,

"How do you know about that?"

Dean looked towards Lila. he hadn't noticed her before, but he recognized her. They had never met of course, but Dean knew her as one of the villains from the Dallas arc of Charlie's comics. The comics that he now knew were about your life and the people in it. Dean narrowed his eyes at Lila, as his face contorted with disgust. Like most other fans of Charlie's comics, Dean did not like Lila. In his mind, Lila deserved no respect. And now, after coming to realize her significance in the circumstances that led you back to him and the things she had done, he hated her even more. She was actively ruining your life by just existing in it. And you, his beloved twin sister, should not have to put up with her existence. Dean wasn't going to tolerate that. Glaring at Lila, in a vile-laced tone, Dean responded,

"I don't associate with homewreckers."

"Excuse me?" Lila replied taken aback

Who was this kid? Who did he think he was calling her a homewrecker? What home was there even to wreck? Diego didn't have a wife or a child. Why was this boy so hostile toward her when they had never met before?

"You're not excused." Dean deadpanned

Lila's jaw dropped as she wracked her brain trying to make sense of what was going on right now.

Like Lila, Five was also trying to comprehend his current situation. Whatever semblance of a plan to discuss the end of the world with his family Five had was now thrown out the window. He was bewildered. Dean was here. Why? Dean knew who he was. WHY? Dean knew about the Kugelblitz. WHY? None of this made sense. Most things didn't make sense at this point but this was something else, and Five needed it to start making sense or he was going to go insane. At least more insane than he already was given what he had come back from. Placing a hand on Dean's shoulder, Five brought Dean's attention back to him.

"Dean, look at me," Five interrogated "How do you know who I am?"

Dean's eyes pulled away from the woman at the top of his shit list to look at Five. Five's face was filled with confusion, which finally reminded Dean of the fact that he technically was not supposed to know who you or the Umbrella Academy were.

"Oh uh, (Y/N) stabbed me with a needle and my brain became a recovered Google Doc and now I recall everything from the first timeline." Dean explained, "Except my death, of course."

Five's head tilted slightly, as he was now more confused than before. How did a needle jog his memory? Why did he mention his death? And what the hell was a Google Doc? Before Five could ask any follow-up questions though, Dean had turned to look at Viktor and added,

"And don't worry Viktor, I don't blame you for killing me, my friends, and everyone else in the world, but that's probably because I can't remember how we died."

The words that had priorly come out of this kid's mouth were confusing to everyone, but that statement struck Viktor like a semi-truck. His confused expression morphed into one of terror as he processed the words he heard. Viktor had killed this kid? He killed this kid's friends? And the only reason he wasn't mad was because he couldn't remember how it happened? What a terrible statement to have come out of some random teenager's mouth and what a terrible reality he now had to live with.

"I- um- what does that even mean?" Viktor questioned concerned

"No time." Five interjected, "How do you know about the Kugelblitz, Dean?"

"Oh, (Y/N) figured it out like a day and a half ago. She scribbled a bunch of math on a wall for an hour like a deranged scientist and then told all of us." Dean answered nonchalantly

Besides Five, the rest of the group look around at each other all wondering the same thing.

"Who's us?" Luther questioned

"The rest of our family. Who I need to be getting back to by the way." Dean responded as he started walking off toward the bar, "They're all over there."

The rest of the group quickly followed behind him but as they approached the bar, they were met with a chaotic scene. A blond boy nervously paced back and forth holding papers in his hands. A sickly-looking girl was heaving over a bin as her friend held her hair and ran a hand up and down her back. And then there was the lanky boy on the ground attempting to claw his way toward a bottle of alcohol just out of reach, as another boy used two whips to hold him by the ankles and pull him back.

"LET ME HAVE IT!" The curly-haired boy shouted

"You've had enough to drink!" The one holding him reprimanded

As most of the group took in the chaos a few revelations came to mind. For Luther and Allison, they recalled vague memories of their time in the bowling alley from the first apocalypse and began to realize that these teens were the same over-enthusiastic ones from then. For Viktor and Lila however, they realized that these kids bore a striking resemblance to the Umbrella Academy with each one corresponding to a different member. It was a little eerie seeing the similarities.

Unlike his siblings though, Five took no notice of the scene before him and instead, his focus shifted only to you. Once his eyes had locked on you it was as if he saw nothing else. He froze for a moment taking in the sight. There you were standing next to the bar looking at some rectangle in your hand. You were okay. You were still alive. He hadn't failed yet. The lights from above the bar cast you in a warm glow that seemed to brighten when you smiled at whatever you were looking at. Looking at you, the panic he had felt from not knowing if you were safe faded away, and without realizing it, he began to walk over to you. Step by step he drew closer, and yet every inch still in between the two of you felt like a mile. For someone whose whole thing was understanding time, he could never seem to grasp how it flowed so differently when he looked at you. Time seemed to move in slow motion as he gently took your face into his hands before pressing his lips firmly against yours.

Your eyes shot wide for a moment and Viktoria's phone fell from your hand as you tried to process what was going on, but you quickly realized there was only one person who could kiss you this sweetly. Five. Even this close up you recognized his face. You let out a happy sigh as he kissed you, your eyes fluttering closed and your arms wrapping around his neck as you pulled him closer to you. You were so relieved he was back.

As the two of you kissed each other, off in your own little world, the rest of the people around looked on. His siblings were honestly shocked. Five never came off as the affectionate type. Sure, he always stated that he loved you, but displaying that affection was rare. They could recount a few occasions in which he held your hand, but besides Luther who saw you kiss him when you showed up at the hotel a few nights ago, none of them could ever recall a time he had openly kissed you like this. Hell, Luther wasn't even sure if that kiss a few nights ago was your first or not.

Your friends however were a completely different story. Whatever they were originally doing came to a complete halt as mischievous smirks and smiles came to their faces. Loudly, they oohed and awed like a group of children finding out you got called to the principal's office. Hearing the comments from your friends, you and Five pulled back from each other, a red blush creeping onto both of your faces.

"Kissing before marriage? So scandalous." Addison chimed

"Yeah, get a room you two." Bren teased

"Shut- shut up." You stammered embarrassed

This was terrible, but this was your karma for teasing your friends about their crushes all those years. Just like you had found their red faces, averted gazes, and stammered responses funny in the past, they now felt the same about you. You could hear the stifled giggles of your friends around the bar and in an effort to avoid their gaze, you instead looked at Five. But as you finally took a good look at him, you now had a new issue on your hands. He was wearing a suit. The suit itself wasn't the issue, it was a nice suit and it looked well-made. The issue was that your boyfriend looked far too good in it. Your brain started to think about the kiss you shared a moment ago. It was sweet with a slight hint of desperation. You thought about how you would've reacted if you had seen him coming your way. Perhaps instead of wrapping your arms around his neck, you would've taken him by the tie to pull him closer. Maybe he would've stepped forward a little more pinning you between him and the bar. You wondered what would happen if the rest of the world was gone. If it was just you two. Alone.

"Jesus Christ, you're down atrocious." Dean remarked aloud, snapping you from your thoughts

Breaking from your trance, your head whipped toward where Dean stood leaning against a pillar.

"I SAID SHUT UP!" You exclaimed loudly

You quickly brought a hand to cover your mouth, regretting how loudly you snapped at him, but the shocked expression on your face and reddening cheeks did not match your twin brother's look of mischievous joy in the slightest. You could see as his smirk became replicated on that of your friends as they all realized Dean had gotten a glimpse into something they weren't privy to, but would love to be.

"What did she say in her head!?" Kenny asked Dean excitedly as he escaped Bren's grasp and grabbed the bottle near him

"Oh, it's not what she said..." Dean responded, mild insinuation in his voice

"Tell us! Tell us! Tell us!" Lucas chanted from his spot next to Addison

"Oh my god, fucking stop." You shouted nervously at your friends before turning to Dean and adding "And you! Get out of my head!"

"Think quieter." Dean remarked, "Before everyone else starts to hear you too."

You were so done with his and the rest of your friends' teasing. Were you down atrocious? Yes, obviously. But that didn't mean they needed to point it out and embarrass you in front of people like this. Especially not your boyfriend and his family. Luckily enough though, as you look around at the Hargreeves present all of them had bewildered expressions on their faces. You were safe. For now. Trying to switch topics before someone could mock you again, you mentioned,

"Anyway! Uh- end of the world, right?"

"Nice pivot." Bren teased

You shot him an annoyed look before turning back to Five who had finally remembered why he had left you in the first place. He left to find out why the world was ending. He found out more than he expected to, but nevertheless, he had the answer to his original question.

"I found out how the world's ending." Five stated, "It's a Kugelblitz."

As much as you missed your boyfriend, the second those words hit your ears you could feel a tinge of annoyance grow within you. You had asked Five not to seek out Lila. Not to leave you when you knew the two of you could figure it out together. But alas, he asked you again and you let him go. However, in his absence, you figured out what was happening with almost 100 percent certainty. You tried to keep your expression neutral, but your voice conveyed your true feelings as you mentioned,

"I know, I figured it out too. Myself. Here. In this time. All on my own."

It was evident that you were still upset about his decision to leave. He felt bad for leaving, but at the time he believed it was the right choice. Maybe he could've brought you with him, but he didn't think that was the best option. He couldn't see you and Lila getting along. And their method of time travel might've caused you pain. And seeing another version of Five die could've hurt your feelings. And...

Five reached into his pocket and held the ring he had found tightly between his fingers. If you had been there when he had found it, he couldn't have possibly given it to you. It would've been disappointing and not how he wanted that to go.

Five pushed his thoughts to the side. He needed to focus on what was going on now. Treading lightly, he responded,

"I heard. Dean mentioned that you figured out about the Kugelblitz."

"And? Anything else?" You inquired, your tone indicating you were looking for a specific response

Over your shoulder, Five could see as Lucas quickly grabbed a white napkin and marker from behind the bar. Rapidly, he wrote something down before holding up the napkin. There was an intense look on his face as he pointed repeatedly to what he had written down. In bold, black letters the nakin said only one thing.

APOLOGIZE

As the only other person in a serious relationship, Five quickly assumed that Lucas knew how to respond from experience. Also, if anyone knew what to say to you in this situation, it would be one of your other friends. Taking his advice, Five looked back toward you and took one of your hands in his, and with sincerity in his tone, he replied,

"I'm sorry for not listening to you and leaving. You were right, we could've figured it out together."

You blinked a few times in surprise. You wanted him to but didn't expect him to actually apologize for leaving. You looked over your shoulder at some of your friends for confirmation that he really did that, and while Lucas frantically shoved something in his mouth, Addison and Viktoria nodded their heads, letting you know you had heard Five correctly. Turning to look back at him, your lips curled up into a smile and you held his hand a little tighter.

"Oh um, thanks. I appreciate you saying that."

Internally, Five let out a sigh of relief. At least for now, that issue had subsided, but there was so much more he wanted to talk to you about. He tried to start forming words in his mind, but as he did so Allison stepped forward. She hadn't followed Five over here for his and your reunion. She followed to get answers about what was going on, especially since Five had returned with the briefcase destroyed.

"I've had enough of this, are you going to tell us what's going on or not, Five?" Allison remarked, frustration in her tone

Five looked at his sister. She wasn't happy, and she hadn't been for a few days now. It seemed like anything anyone did was infuriating to her, but it's not like she was helping to fix that either. However, even with her unpleasant disposition, she was right. Five needed to explain at least to his siblings what was going on since you had already informed your friends. Letting go of your hand Five walked around to the backside of the bar.

"Yeah, okay." Five replied, "Gather round everyone."

The rest of the Hargreeves and Lila, while still unsure about what just happened, and the random teenagers hanging about, stood around the bar while you and your friends stayed where you were. Grabbing some shot glasses, Five began to pour out drinks for the rest of the group, handing them out one by one to his family and Lila.

This was going to be a hard talk...

Five wondered how you delivered the news to your friends. They seemed so upbeat even when all of existence was disappearing. Then again, from what he knew, your friends respected you far more than his siblings did and probably didn't blame you for something out of your control. Pouring a shot for himself, Five immediately gulped it down. A little bit of liquid courage never hurt, and perhaps it could numb the pain of the verbal pile-on he expected to happen.

"So this Kugelblitz, it's...?" Viktor began to speak

"The end of everything." Five interjected "Every rock, every star, every atom sucked into a radiant black hole. Randomly collapsing matter every moment in time across all existence till nothing's left."

"Oof." Kenny said aloud

You couldn't help but snicker at his comment. You were in a terrible situation but oof was probably the funniest response someone could give to that explanation. It was a simple joke and reminded you of easier times, what was there not to enjoy about it? However, you realized your sentiment wasn't shared as the heads of the Hargreeves and Lila quickly turned to look toward you. The way they looked at you was as if you had laughed at a funeral. Well, given that the end of the world was at hand, you kind of did. Remembering that it was not just you and your friends anymore, you regained your composure and in a more serious tone stated,

"I'm sorry. It's not funny."

You could hear the mumblings of your friends saying they thought it was funny, but the Hargreeves paid no attention as they turned back to Five. Pouring himself another shot, he looked into his glass, stared at his reflection in the liquid, and mentioned,

"Hate to say I told you so, but..."

"You love to say I told you so." Viktor retorted back

"You know, it's impressive." Lila began to speak, setting her still-full glass down on the bar

The attention of you and your friends turned to Lila as she spoke, but the lighthearted vibe that was present between you all just a moment ago was quickly replaced with one of anger and resentment. The Hargreeves and Lila could feel the tension grow in the air as the chattering of you and your friends went silent. You all watched Lila, with expressions ranging from neutral to judgemental to disgusted. Nevertheless, Lila finished her statement saying,

"Whoever knocked off your mums hated you all enough to end the entire universe."

Lila's remark instantly sent anger through your system. If her comment was a gunshot your response was the ricochet. You couldn't speak for the mothers of the umbrellas since they did technically sell their children, but your mom, and by extension of what had happened, your dad, didn't deserve to die. They were the best people you knew.  Before you could even realize you had done it, Lila's shot glass exploded in front of her. Tiny shards of glass flew outward in the area catching everyone's attention. You didn't look at anyone, but you could feel their gazes on you.

"Fucking bitch." Addison muttered as she reached to hold your hand

Taking her hand, you held it tightly, as you held the beginnings of tears back. You took deep breaths and tried your best to keep them quiet. You had to keep a strong face. You could be upset, but you couldn't cry. If you did, Lila would probably take it as a win against you and your friends would see it as a reason to start a fight. And neither of those things you needed.

Some of your friends however were already willing to start a fight. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Dean step away from the wall he was leaning against, his expression angry and his eyes trained on Lila. But before he could walk over to her you used your powers to gently shove him back against it. Looking at him you thought,

Don't do it.

He looked back at you, still obviously disgruntled, but with arms crossed over his chest, he leaned back against the wall. You could hear it in your head as he thought,

Fine.

As Addison held your hand, and some of your other friends whispered comments to each other, Kenny walked over to you and poured some of the liquor from the bottle he was drinking from into your glass. Your friends' actions were small but they meant a lot to you.

There was a silence as everyone glanced around at each other waiting for who would be next to speak. Viktor looked between you and Lila. Between Lila's comment and your reaction to it, there was no safe way for him to bring up what Harlan had shown him. And that wasn't even including the reactions everyone else would have if Viktor did say something. He needed to do something to get the conversation away from where it was headed and to lessen the tension in the air. Trying to divert the topic, Viktor hesitantly said,

"We- we don't know that Lila..."

"It doesn't matter who created the thing." Allison stated firmly "We just have to kick its ass."

"Oh really? How?" Luther questioned sarcastically "Are you and Diego gonna punch it in the Kugel?"

Allison shot back a glare at Luther, but it was quickly ignored as he could feel the presence of someone behind him. Turning back, he saw the boy from the bowling alley who looked like him standing there. The boy nervously fidgeted with a stack of paper in his hands as he shyly greeted,

"H-hi Luther."

Luther couldn't remember this kid's name in the slightest. all he knew was that he looked like him and was one of your friends.

"Ah, it's...you." Luther said awkwardly, unsure of how to proceed "Bowling alley kid."

"It's Lucas." Lucas stated, reminding Luther of his name

"Right." Luther replied

The memories were vague, but he was starting to remember more of that night at the bowling alley. However, the only thing that came to mind was the numerous similarities the two of them shared. It was slightly unsettling, but there wasn't much either of them could do about that. Luther waited for Lucas to say something, but instead, Lucas stared up at Luther with a smile. Trying to figure out what was going on here, Luther asked,

"Can I help you with something?"

"Oh uh- yes!" Lucas replied, remembering why he approached Luther

Lucas looked down at the adoption papers in his hands. You had helped him forge the signatures of Luther and Sloane last night, before making a copy of the documents and filing them away in city hall. It wasn't the most ethical way of going about things, but it made Lucas happy. He had new parents! This was all he ever wanted. Even with his excitement, nervousness still filled him. Lucas had to tell Luther that he was his parent now, and he wasn't sure what to say. This had only come to fruition last night, and instead of preparing he was busy doing other things.

"I- wow, I really thought I'd get more time to prepare for this but uh-" Lucas stuttered

"Lucas, the world is ending. Spit it out." Luther requested

"YOU'RE LEGALLY MY DAD NOW!" Lucas loudly proclaimed

The heads of the Hargreeves snapped to look over at the two tall blonds. Most reactions were that of confusion, but Allison's face morphed with rage. First Diego gets a child and now Luther too? What was next? You and Five picking a baby off the street? It wasn't fair. She had Claire, her daughter, and she couldn't be with her! But everyone else got to be a parent? It was wrong. Angrily, Allison drank from her glass, her gaze boring into Luther's back as he stood there unmoving.

Lucas looked at Luther, silently waiting for him to say something. Anything. But nothing came. It's not that Luther didn't want to reply, he just couldn't formulate any thoughts. And instead of saying anything of meaning, he could only manage to get out a simple,

"What?"

"Don't worry though!" Lucas quickly explained "Your girlfriend, Sloane, she's legally my mom. It's all in here."

Lucas held out the adoption papers for Luther to take, and after a moment of hesitation, he did. Quickly he flipped through the documents, but to his surprise, they were legitimate. Even Luther's signature looked correct. Luther didn't know how this happened, but he couldn't be Lucas' father. He didn't know what to do. He didn't even have a good example of what to do either. And anyway, he saw how poorly Diego was doing with Stan, and he didn't want to be like that. Lucas seemed like a good kid, but Luther wasn't sure if he could take on this responsibility. Especially not with the world ending. Trying to let Lucas down nicely, Luther began,

"Listen, I-"

Seeing where Luther's response was going, you pulled yourself together and cut him off as you interjected,

"Lucas, can I speak to Luther real quick?"

"Oh, sure!" Lucas replied

Politely, you pulled Luther off to the side away from the bar. Using your powers you controlled the molecules around you, creating a sound barrier to stop anyone from hearing your conversation. With your back facing the group, you looked up at Luther with a serious look on your face and began,

"Luther, you better listen up because I am only going to say this once. That sweet angel of a boy has been through hell, sometimes worse than you did, in TWO timelines, to get to this moment."

Luther's eyebrows furrowed as he processed what you said. Lucas went through hell sometimes worse than Luther ever did? That was a serious statement to make.

"What happened?" Luther asked, cutting you off

You grimaced. Although the only one who could see so was Luther. All the times Lucas came to you for help because of what he had gone through with Austin ran through your mind. It hurt you to remember your friend's pain.

"I can't tell you exactly what happened. I promised him I wouldn't, but it was badand he didn't deserve it..." You replied quietly, a slight tremble in your voice

Luther looked at you and your pained expression before looking behind you at Lucas. Noticing Luther look his way, Lucas smiled brightly and waved excitedly, completely unaware of what Luther had just learned. He seemed like such a nice, happy kid. No one would ever guess something bad happened to him.

"He's my friend. I care about him and his happiness so much." You stated firmly, a hint of pain still in your tone "So if you break his heart, I will kill you in the most painful way possible and then go tell Sloane you did something so heinous the only option was to kill you. Are we clear?"

Luther turned his attention away from Lucas and back to you. Luther did not want to die by your hand. If you said you'd make it painful, you meant it. And on top of that, he didn't want Sloane to think poorly of him. But most of all, Luther didn't want to hurt Lucas, who he now saw some of himself in beyond just appearance. The world was ending, and currently, they had no plan to stop that, so he could at least try to do something good. Luther nodded his head at your words, and seeing his acknowledgment, in a more positive voice with an undertone of violence, you replied,

"Good. Now go be a better father than yours was."

Luther grimaced slightly at your words. You weren't wrong, but it still hurt. Nevertheless, he was going to do what he was told because there was still an undercurrent of violence radiating off of you. Carefully stepping away, he made his way back toward Lucas, who looked up at him excitedly. Luther stared back at him blankly as he wondered what to say. As you had stated, he didn't have a good father. What does a good dad say to their kid? Luther couldn't say I love you because that would be weird to say to a teenage boy he just met again, even if legally it was his son. He could probably say he's proud of him though, right? That's something Reginald never said so it had to be something a good dad would say. Then again, Luther didn't know what there was to be proud of, he was literally pushed into this role less than a minute ago.

"So...son...you have any recent accomplishments..?" Luther asked, still trying to figure out what to be proud of

Lucas was silent for a moment after hearing the question. Neither Austin nor Meredith ever asked him about his accomplishments. They may have birthed him and raised him, but for seventeen years they never cared about him. And yet here, barely one minute after telling Luther he was now his father, he asked about what he had accomplished. It was his first question to him as his dad. And on top of that, he called him son. Not Lucas. Son. Tears began to form in Lucas' eyes as his hands clenched into fists to hide the shaking that was starting to happen. He was happy and sad and everything that could fall in between, but if he burst into tears it would ruin this first moment. He couldn't do that, time was finite. He had to make this count. He looked over at Addison, his one and only, and smiled. She was his home. She was where he felt safe. She was his everything. And having her by his side was his greatest achievement. Looking back at the man he now called dad, he gestured over toward her as he happily exclaimed,

"I got married last night! My girlfriend is now my wife!"

Well, that wasn't what Luther was expecting, and by the looks on the rest of his siblings' faces, they surely didn't expect it either. Lucas and his...wife...seemed a bit young but, nevertheless, marriage is a nice thing so Luther could be proud of that.

"Congrats, son. I am proud of you." Luther said in an awkward but supportive tone before looking at Addison and adding "And hello...daughter-in-law."

"Hi, Luther." Addison replied politely "Ignore my friend puking. She's not sick anymore she's just so excited to finally meet Viktor."

"I'm going to talk to Lucas again now." Luther said unsure how to respond to that

"What? Me?" Viktor questioned

"Vi, don't be weird. Say hello." Addison encouraged

Looking up from her trash bin, Viktoria's eyes met Viktor's as she excitedly stated,

"Hi. I'm Viktoria! I was Viktor a long time ago but I'm not Viktor now, I'm Viktoria but you're Viktor so we're like the same and that's cool!"

Immediately after finishing her statement though, Viktoria once again puked into her bin from excitement. However, excitement was not the word Viktor would use to describe this meeting. Instead, a few different descriptors came to mind. Bewilderment. Concern. Deja vu. Overall, everything after Five and Lila's return had been confusing and concerning but looking into the face of a teenager who looked exactly like Viktor when he was younger. Now that was something else. And on top of it, he didn't understand anything of what they had just said.

"I'm sorry what?" Viktor asked looking for clarity

"Oh uh, Viktoria is transgender like you and your current name is her old name. Y'know Viktor, Viktoria, they're very similar so she's excited." Addison explained, "You're her hero."

"How?" Viktor questioned confused before quieting their tone stating "Nobody knew about me until my book."

Picking her head back up from the bin Viktoria replied,

"That's not true! I saw you in the background or off to the side of interviews the Umbrella Academy did. I picked up the viola because I saw you had a string instrument case on you in one of them!  I practiced the viola every day. I owned and memorized your book in three languages. I did a whole report on you in middle school!"

"I hated that project." You chimed in

"Yeah, yeah. Broken hand, emotional trauma, we already know." Viktoria retorted before continuing, "Anyway, I wanted to be just like you."

"Really?" Viktor inquired

"Yeah! Of course!" Viktoria replied sincerely, "You're my hero."

A small smile came to Viktor's face. It was nice to know that someone looked up to him even before he figured out about his powers again. And in a way, even though this was someone else saying these things, it felt like a younger version of himself telling him he was worth it even before everything that happened.

While the emotional bonding between some of your friends and the Hargreeves was happening, it had no effect on Five. He stopped paying attention to what was transpiring after he heard Lucas state that he and Addison got married. Five wasn't shocked by their young age, nor the short time frame in which they were reunited and then married. He was just surprised that a wedding had occurred. It felt like the universe was sending him gut punch after gut punch when it came to marriage. The hallucination, the ballroom, the ring, and now this! He didn't know if the universe was trying to push him in a direction or just down an emotional spike pit. Still in disbelief Five restated aloud,

"They're married?"

"They sure are! I married them last night!" Kenny exclaimed

Five looked from Kenny over to Lucas and Addison. There was love in their eyes as they looked at each other. They had no cares except each other even if the world was ending. Five couldn't help but feel a jolt of jealousy run through him. It wasn't fair that he was burdened with saving the world while everyone else got to do as they pleased. But these were your friends and it felt wrong to be upset at their happiness. In an effort to hide his feelings, Five picked up his drink taking a big sip of the liquor within. But as he did so Kenny spoke up commenting,

"Why are you and (Y/N) looking to get married? I'm legally ordained, I can marry you two right now."

Hearing those words, Five began to choke on his drink, and whiskey, a drink that typically would go down smooth, did anything but. Five's mind darted all over the place as he processed Kenny's words. Married? Now? No, you couldn't. He hadn't proposed. But he had a ring in his pocket. So he could. Surrounded by friends and family is kind of romantic, right? But he just announced the end of the world, and that certainly wasn't. And this was nothing like he planned in his head. But if the world kept sending him signs maybe the two of you should just bite the bullet? As his mind raced and he coughed on his drink, his eyes darted over toward you trying to gauge your reaction. However, he was only met with a look of concern probably because he was literally and metaphorically choking. With no context clues from you on how to respond, Five stuttered, trying to get any response out,

I- uh- well- we-"

"Kenny! This is the seventh time you've done this in the past day!" Bren reprimanded, smacking the back of Kenny's head "Stop asking people if they want to get married!"

Relieved by Bren cutting him off, Five managed to pull himself together. This was going terribly. He could anticipate the way his siblings reacted to situations or the types of comments they would make, but he couldn't say the same for your friends. Glancing over at you again, he saw as you calmly sipped from your glass watching your two friends bicker.

"What! Nothing speeds up major life decisions like the end of everything!" Kenny replied exasperated at Bren's disapproval

"Some of them weren't even couples!" Bren shot back

You were completely unaffected by this. It was honestly impressive. Then again this is what you dealt with for years, you must've been used to it by now. But as you lowered your glass he noticed something else. You smiled. Curious, he leaned closer to you and asked,

"You're happy they're fighting?"

"They're best friends, it's not fighting to them." You replied taking another sip from your glass "And there's comfort in the chaos."

"How so?" Five inquired

"It's familiar." You answered, "Reminds me of times before well...y'know."

"Oh." Five said aloud "Right."

Five's eyes averted your gaze and his head turned slightly to look away from you. Perhaps it was unconscious to him, but you could sense the shift in his demeanor. Placing your hand on his cheek you gently turned his face to look at you. You could feel as he leaned into your touch. It seemed that with every curveball life threw at him he needed these small gestures of affection more and more, and you would never deny him the love he both needed and deserved. With his gaze returning to you, you looked back at him softly.

"They're here and you're here, and that's all I want at this point." You cooed "So stop worrying about me and put that smart brain of yours toward coming up with a plan."

"I can never stop worrying about you." Five replied gently

"Maybe you should." Allison jabbed "Do you even have a plan, Five?"

The harsh comment caught the attention of everyone else as they all turned their gazes to Five. However, Five looked toward his sister, an irritated look was plastered across her face. He knew what her problem was, but he felt no reason to engage with her. If she didn't want to accept reality and blame it on everyone else that was her problem to deal with. Not Five's. Turning away from his sister, he looked at the wider crowd around the bar.

"Well, the best plan is to go back in time and eliminate the paradox and destroy whatever it was that took out our mothers and stop the Kugelblitz before it starts," Five explained, "But we can't do that. Briefcase is kaput."

"And why the hell can't you just jump us out of here?" Allison complained

"Last time I tried that, we all got trapped in time. Do you really wanna risk that again?" Five questioned back

Leaning over to Addison and Viktoria, you lowered your voice as you told them,

"I'd risk it if you guys could come this time."

"Let's go to a timeline where Spider-Man is real and falls instantly in love with you." Viktoria jokingly whispered back

"Jeez, Viktoria wants to see a fight." Addison quietly chimed in

"A fight? Viktoria wants to see a homicide." You quietly shot back

"Well, do you want to see a homicide?" Addison teasingly inquired

Your eyes darted over to your boyfriend as you recalled the time you and he killed the board of directors for the commission. The way he was covered in blood and the determined look in his eyes. God, he was so hot. Honestly, part of you wanted to see what he was like jealous. And the thought of him getting in a fight over you? Well, now that was appealing. You were surely willing to lose Spider-Man if you got to see that. With a smirk on your face, you looked back at Addison and Viktoria as you replied unseriously,

"Whaaat? Noooo...that would be crazy."

The three of you attempted to stifle your laughter so as not to distract the Hargreeves from their incessant bickering over what to do now. But as you tried to enjoy the moment with your friends, Dean noticed a trio of figures heading toward the bar. Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves, and some random kid, who he could only assume was Diego's oops baby. Whatever joy he may have felt from seeing his friends having a good time together disappeared the moment he saw Diego's stupid face. Instead, anger began to build up inside Dean as he recalled the things you had told him that Diego had done recently that upset you. He knew he was the better brother. He had never done anything to hurt you like Diego had and one way or another, he was going to make Diego recognize how badly he fucked up. As the trio finally arrived at the bar, and Diego walked up beside Lila, Dean commented sarcastically,

"Wow, what a surprise. The deadbeat actually showed up."

"Mine didn't..." Kenny mentioned

"This isn't about you, Kenny." Dean replied

While Dean's comments didn't phase your friends, some sideways glances were sent Dean's way including one from you. However, unlike the Hargreeves, your glance was that of concern.

Dean was...passionate.

He felt things very deeply and had a tendency to express his feelings openly. And he wasn't one to shy away from an argument either. Or a fight.

You hoped that his comment was a one-off jab, but knowing him you'd have to keep a watchful eye out. 

As Stan stood next to Diego, he looked around at the people around the bar. Some of the faces were familiar to him but there were a number that he had never seen before. Looking to Diego, Stan asked,

"Who are all these people?"

"Oh, and he brought the sentient jizz stain too." Dean remarked

Like the rest of his siblings, Diego gave another sideways glance toward Dean. However, unlike the disbelief on their faces, Diego's reaction was more disgruntled. He couldn't recall much of this kid, but he knew one thing, he was your friend. Looking around the bar, to much relief, he saw you sitting across the way.

Your eyes caught Diego's for a moment, and from his face, you knew what he was looking at you for, and unsurprisingly, it wasn't the fact that you were missing for almost two days. There was no sense of concern on his face, only an annoyed look as his eyes flicked over to Dean before looking back at you. Pretending not to have noticed his gaze, you summoned Viktoria's phone which you had dropped earlier, to your hand and began to start scrolling through it again. You felt no incentive to stop Dean's comments because honestly, you co-signed his sentiments. You couldn't make comments like his without stirring the waters between all the Hargreeves, but Dean could make his comments freely without causing too much interpersonal drama. So unless you felt like he was about to get hurt, there was no reason for you to intervene.

Lila however, did not appreciate Dean's comments. Turning around to look at him, she criticized,

"Hey, don't be mean to my kid."

"Hey, nobody asked Wrong Direction." Dean replied, mocking her tone "And for your information, nobody here believes that the sex trophy- no- participation award- is actually yours."

Lila's eyes darted around the rest of your friend group, only to be met with disgusted glares or smug smirks. Did you all know the truth? Did you know that Stan wasn't her or Diego's child? Or was it only a comment made to catch her off guard? Either way, there was a slight unease at the thought that made her keep quiet. But before she could think of something to say, Klaus walked up to the bar, grabbing a glass out of Five's hand, as he stated,

"Gimme that."

"What happened to you?" Five questioned, looking at the blood on his shirt

"Oh, just a speargun to the chest. I died. No big deal." Klaus replied

"Oh neat! Did you meet the girl on the bike?" Kenny asked

"No, thankfully I didn't have to deal with her," Klaus answered, taking a sip from the glass

But as he drank, he realized the voice that had asked the question was unfamiliar. It didn't belong to one of his siblings, or you, or Lila. Placing his glass down he looked over to where the unknown voice came from only to be met with a teen boy who looked just like Klaus in his youth. It took a moment, but through his resurrection haze, he vaguely recognized the boy as the one from years ago at the bowling alley. Klaus paused for a moment. The little girl on the bike, aka god, could only be met on the other side. Not even ghosts who stuck around on this plane of existence knew who she was. So how did this kid, who was very much alive, know of her?

"I'm sorry- how do you know god?" Klaus questioned

"I've met her. I see her sometimes when I pass out at parties. She adores me." Kenny replied enthusiastically

Kenny's response left Klaus with more questions than answers. This kid met god? And multiple times at that? How? He would've had to die to have met god. Did he die? Was this kid also immortal somehow? And what did he mean by she adores him? Klaus' experiences with her were filled with annoyance, so why was he welcome?

"I have follow-up questions," Klaus stated aloud

"This isn't about you, Klaus." Diego interjected, before looking at Lila and asking "What did we miss?"

"The universe is ending, and we're all going to die," Lila answered

"You say it as if it isn't your fault..." Dean scoffed

Diego's head whipped over to look at Dean. He had only made a few comments, but those few were more than enough, and Diego was tired of his shit. Trying to get an answer for his actions, Diego stepped up toward Dean and snapped,

"What is your deal?"

Dean scowled at Diego and rage burned inside him. Dean hated Diego for all the ways he had upset you. He hated him for forgetting Eudora once she died. He hated him for hooking up with the first person who gave him attention after Eudora's death. He hated him for being stupid and getting said person knocked up. He hated him for abandoning you consistently throughout that process when you needed him now more than ever. He hated that even through all of that he had the gall to still consider himself a brother to you. But most of all, he hated that he actually looked up to such a degenerate scumbag for so long. Taking a step toward Diego, with fire in his eyes and vile in his tone, Dean shouted back,

"My deal is that you've got a lot of nerve showing up here, fucking Benedict Arnold."

And with that, it was time for you to intervene because whatever was coming after this wasn't going to be pretty. Flashing over to Dean, you placed a hand on his shoulder and pushed him back a few steps. Lowering your voice, you asked,

"What are you trying to do? Start a turf war in the middle of this shithole?"

"No, I'm saying what needs to be said," Dean replied before raising his voice and loudly stating "But I wouldn't mind getting a few swings on the infidelity duo over there."

"Stop that." You chastised "You're going to get hurt."

"No I won't," Dean refuted "With you I'm already on the winning side."

Dean was right, if he got in a fight with Diego you would take his side. And on top of that if you could solo all the Sparrows you could 100% take down all the Umbrellas. Well...so long as you beat Viktor to the punch, but that wasn't important. No matter how capable of a fighter Dean was, and he was capable, you didn't want him to get hurt.

"Dean no," You said pushing him a little further from Diego and Lila "Just take the high ground. Please."

Dean was your twin brother, and if you made a decision or suggestion, he was always the first to accept and respect it. If he backed down now then hopefully Diego would resign himself as well. You watched as Dean looked at you, his face softened upon seeing your pleading gaze. Placing a gentle hand on your shoulder, he looked at you sincerely as he replied,

"No."

Your pleading look turned to confusion as Dean sidestepped you and locked eyes on Diego. Marching over to him with his gaze unbreaking, Dean's rage came back in full swing as he angrily shouted,

"Fuck you Diego Hargreeves you traitorous ass bitch! I regret looking up to a two-faced adulterous prick like you. I hope you constantly stub your toe. I hope your dick falls off. I hope all of your knife attacks miss even with your bitch ass powers. I hope your pet sperm right there is a lifelong disappointment like you. I hope you ruin your life and don't realize it until it's too late you snake-ass No Belt Prize-winning whore."

You look at Dean in disbelief. He rarely even went against you, especially not after the incident when you were seventeen. However, it seemed that currently, his emotions were stronger than his judgment. You readied yourself to jump between the two of them, but you paused as you felt tension fill the air. It wasn't the type of tension that came from people disagreeing though. No, this was the tension that built before something snapped.

"(Y/N), are you gonna do anything about him?" Diego angrily asked

You didn't respond. The hairs on the back of your neck stood up as you sensed something growing in energy. Slowly, you turned your head to look in the direction of the sensation only to be met with a terrible omen. You saw as the molecules around you began to vibrate faster and faster and faster. More than they typically did. A knot formed in the pit of your stomach as you stared down the danger heading your way.

Breaking his gaze on Diego, Dean looked at you. Immediately, he clocked the way your hands shook at your sides and the slight staggering of your breathing. Were you okay?

"(Y/N)?" Dean called concerned

You couldn't respond. You couldn't move. You couldn't do anything except prepare for what was coming. And while no words escaped your lips, you only had one thought,

Help.

Hearing your thought, Dean pushed Diego out of the way and as another wave of the Kugelblitz hit you and you began to collapse to the floor, Dean caught you from behind and brought you to the ground. The pain was searing as you now lay on the ground, your head resting in Dean's lap. The energy of the wave ripped at you causing the prior gashes on your cheek and hand to reopen, while new ones formed on your forearm and collarbone. Blood seeped from the wounds as you looked up at Dean for help. You tried to speak but your breath caught in your throat. No. It wasn't just caught. 

You couldn't breathe. 

Fear filled your eyes as you attempted to gasp for air only to be met with nothing. Dean held your face in his hands, fear reflected in his eyes as he watched you struggle. His mind raced back to that day in the warehouse. He couldn't let that happen again. Looking up, with a tremble in his voice, Dean called out,

"Guys h-help."

But by the time he had finished his plea the rest of your friends were already surrounding you. Kneeling in a circle on the ground, your friends' bodies unintentionally created a wall keeping others away from you, including that of Five. He tried to get close, tried to kneel by your side like the rest of them, but there was just no space. And so, he was relegated to just standing and watching in fear as you struggled against something completely out of his control. 

As fear coursed through the veins of all your friends, Kenny knew he had to do something. Of course he was scared for you, you were his friend, but he couldn't let his fear get in the way of helping you. He was the most qualified in this situation after all. Taking a deep breath he calmed his nerves, and as he had done many times before in his EMT job, he quickly began to control the situation. He first looked toward Bren, who was kneeling to the left of him, and commanded,

"Grab my bag. Now."

Quickly, Bren pulled out one of his whips and snapped it towards the medbag that Kenny had miraculously brought in with him. Snagging the bag's handle, Bren pulled his whip back toward him. With the medbag in hand, he passed it over to Kenny who immediately opened it. 

As Kenny put on a pair of latex gloves, he looked at Addison and directed,

"You need to get her to breathe. I don't have the supplies to monitor her this time if she loses consciousness again."

With a quick nod of her head, Addison turned her attention back toward you. Hesitantly, Dean removed his hands from the sides of your face as he now let Addison hold it. Your eyes were glassy from the lack of oxygen, but the fear behind him as you fought to stay conscious was ever-present. Gently, she maneuvered your head to meet her gaze and when your eyes were focused on her she stated,

"(Y/N), I need you to breathe. It can be a gulp, it can be a gasp, but you need to breathe. NOW."

As her words hit your ears and you saw the serious look in her eye you felt compelled to do what she said. Pushing through the pain, you found the strength within yourself to breathe. Taking in large gasping breaths, the world came into more focus, but each breath felt like a dozen knives cutting into your lungs. You wondered if death would be less painful than this.

Your thought didn't matter though as Kenny had already decided that you were not dying today. With you finally managing to breathe he began the process of quickly fixing you up. Using a large rubber band, he tied it tightly just above your elbow to cut the circulation of blood off and stop the gash on your forearm from bleeding out. With the largest problem mitigated for now, he used alcohol wipes to clean up the blood and disinfect your other open wounds before placing medical tape over them.

You let out a scream as the alcohol stung your gashes. The world was already tearing you to shreds from the inside and the sting of the alcohol, although minor in comparison, hurt like a bitch when combined with the pain of the wave.

"Hold on to my arm. You can grip it til the pain stops." Lucas encouraged as he switched spots with Addison

Your hand shakily moved to grab his arm, but you hesitated for a moment. If you grabbed him, it was going to be tight. The pain was unyielding. You didn't want to bruise him. You thought,

 I don't want to hurt him.

Dean looked away from you for only a moment as he met Lucas' eye and informed him,

"She doesn't want to hurt you."

Lucas looked away from Dean and back toward you. Taking your hand, he placed it on his arm. He knew why you of all people would hesitate, but you were always there for him when he was hurting and now he was going to do the same for you. With sincerity in his tone, Lucas stated,

"(Y/N), you could never hurt me."

 You gave him a weak smile, but tears fell from your eyes as you internally begged for this to be over. With each wave, the time between starting and stopping increased, just as the intensity of the pain you felt grew too. You shut your eyes tightly, but opened them again as you felt someone wipe away your tears. You looked up at Dean who, just like when this ordeal started, held your face gently in his hands.

"You're gonna be okay. I'm here. I'm he-here this time. I'm gonna k-keep you safe. I swear." Dean comforted as he tried to choke back sobs, "Just keep your eyes open. Please just keep your eyes open." 

With the hand that wasn't holding Lucas' arm, you shakily reached up and wiped your brother's tears away. 

"You're the one in pain, y-you shouldn't be worried about us." Dean slightly joked, his voice still wavering

Through gritted teeth, you managed to smile slightly. You loved your friends so much. They meant everything to you and in a time like this, where they all worried for you, you needed them to know.

"I...love...you guys." You managed to get out, "Don't...let...me go."

"We could never let you go." Vitoria responded

"Yeah, you matter far too much." Addison added

"You're our glitter glue, remember?" Lucas reminded "You keep us together."

"Not just that, you're our family." Kenny mentioned

"If it wasn't for you, we wouldn't be us." Bren stated

"We love you." Dean replied, "Never forget that."

Even through the fear and the sadness, you could see the beginnings of smiles on your friends' faces. You could feel as they all got closer and each of them tried to hold some part of you. You could feel it as the wave became stronger again. It was finally returning. Even though it hadn't been more than a minute or two it felt like forever, but you could feel that this would be over soon. You closed your eyes tightly and focused on the feeling of your friends surrounding you as the wave finally went past. And when it stopped everything around you felt...lighter. 

Opening your eyes, you took a deep breath and fortunately, it didn't feel like you were being pierced repeatedly anymore. You didn't have the strength in you to stand yet, but you did manage to get yourself to kneel. With your mind no longer focused on the pain you felt, you looked for your friends, but they were nowhere to be found. All that you could immediately see were the shocked or horror-filled faces of the Hargreeves. Why were they looking at you like that? You looked up at Five, his jaw was slightly agape and sadness swirled in his eyes. Looking down at yourself, you saw blood stains and gauze litter your body. Oh. He was probably so worried about you. Turning your gaze back to Five, you gave him a weak smile.

"It's not that bad. Kenny can take care of it." You comforted before looking around and asking, "Where is he? Where are my friends?"

Five's heart dropped to the pit of his stomach as he heard your question. How could he look you in the eyes and tell you that all of your friends were gone? As you struggled with the pain of the kugel wave, he watched as all of your friends got blitzed. Quickly, quietly, and god, hopefully painlessly they vanished. How could he explain this without breaking your heart?

"Love...they..." Five tried to speak

He stopped. He couldn't get the words out. 

"What?" You questioned concerned "Where are they?"

"Ma cherie..." He replied mournfully

His lack of response worried you. Frantically, you began to look around the area for your friends again, but you still couldn't see any of them. It wouldn't be like them to leave your side when you were injured. They had never done so before. They always stayed closed until they knew you were okay. Where were they? Using your powers you tried to sense their molecules, but there were only faint traces in the area from loose hairs and skin cells. Your head whipped back and forth in a panic searching for any sign of them when you saw a glint out of the corner of your eye. You reached back for the sparking object, took it in your hand, and turned to look down upon it. There in the palm of your hand was a set of car keys.

Dean's car keys.

His car was his prized possession. Veronica was his baby. He never forgot his keys. He never lost his keys. He never went anywhere without his keys. But if these were here and he wasn't...

Oh god...

No.

A blood-curdling scream erupted from your throat as you clenched the keys against your chest. They were gone. They were gone and it was all your fault. You bought them here to keep them all safe and now you had none of them. Your body hunched over as you gasped for breath between your screams and sobs. Your face was red as tears streamed down in messy streaks with nowhere to go except the floor where your friends' once kneeled at your side.

Dropping to his knees, Five wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into him. He held you as tight as he could and ran a gentle hand through your hair as he tried to soothe you. His efforts didn't do much at all though, and how could he expect them to? If he was in your place, if it was you that he lost, he'd be inconsolable. 

"THEY PROMISED!" You shouted grief-stricken "THEY PROMISED WE'D STAY TOGETHER!!!"

"I'm sorry my love." Five tried to comfort "I'm so sorry."

Looking at your boyfriend, you tightly grabbed his jacket, the material balling in your hands as you begged,

"Baby, bring them back. Please."

"I- I can't..." Five sorrowfully replied

"Yes you can! Just reverse time! Bring them back!" You cried

If Five could've brought your friends back, he would've done it already. The sight of you in so much emotional distress was somehow more painful than seeing the way the kugel waves affected you. In either case, he had no control over what happened, but he wished he did.

"I can't...I used all my energy to get back here." Five lamented "And even if I could, I can't stop the kugel wave from happening."

You could feel your chest tighten and another piece of your ever-fragile heart shatter as you struggled with the fact that you got your friends back only to lose them again. Pain morphed into anger as you pushed Five away shouting,

"WHAT GOOD ARE TIME POWERS IF YOU CAN'T EVEN FUCKING USE THEM!"

Your words stung and it hurt Five that you pushed him away, but he knew that you were only acting out of grief. You didn't mean it, you were just hurt.

Quickly, your anger came and went as the feeling of overwhelming grief returned. Dropping Dean's keys on the ground in front of you, you threw your head into your hands as you let out another mix of uncontrollable sobs and anguish-filled screams. As you cried the lights in the area began to flicker and nearby objects rattled in their place.

Seeing the disturbance in the area, Stan, who was already on edge from accidentally killing Klaus and witnessing a bunch of people disappear, became frightened. Looking up at Diego, he said nervously,

"Dad, I'm scared."

Hearing Stan speak, you looked over in the direction of his voice. Oh? He was scared? What did he have to be scared of? He wasn't the one bleeding out, nor the one who just lost six loved ones. You were. If anyone was scared and in need of comfort, it was YOU.  You saw as Diego looked at you. There was concern on his face and for a moment you thought he would come over to you. But then he looked at Stan behind him and you watched as Diego, literally and figuratively, turned his back on you to hug Stanley. And in that moment, something in you broke as you realized you had no family left. 

Diego knew that you were the cause of the flickering lights and shaking objects. Occasionally,  when your emotions became too extreme it caused your powers to affect the world around you. He needed to calm you down, and things would return to normal. Letting go of Stan, Diego looked at him and comforted,

"It'll be okay. Just give me a second."

Turning from Stan, Diego began to walk over to you. Your face was wet from tears, but adrenaline rushed through your veins as he approached. You couldn't stand to be near him. Fury outweighed your body's weak unease as you began to push yourself to your feet. Seeing you try to stand, Diego took  your arm to help you up, but you quickly shook him off as you demanded,

"Don't touch me!"

"I just want to help," Diego explained

"No! Go away!" You yelled

"Let me just-" Diego began to say as he tried to take your arm once more

Like a storm in your mind, waves of emotions all clashed together. Sadness. Grief. Betrayal. Anger. Abandonment. Mixing together they were a recipe for unimaginable sorrow. You weren't just hurt, you were broken. Why did Diego want to help you now? He didn't rush to your side, like Five or your friends, when the wave hit. He didn't hold you and tell you you'll be okay as the world ripped you apart. He didn't comfort you as you realized all your friends were gone. He did none of those things. But you knew who would've.

Your dad.

You were his little anomaly. His perfect little girl. Your dad loved you so dearly and if he was here he would've been by your side already. How dare Diego, in the aftermath of everything, now decide to come over to you. How dare he now decide you were important enough to help. You didn't want his help! You didn't want him! You wanted your dad! Rage, strengthened by your grief, engulfed you as you shouted harshly,

"YOU'RE NOT MY DAD, DIEGO!"

A heavy silence fell over the group as your words echoed through the area. As you finally managed to get to your feet, you bent down and picked up the roll of gauze from Kenny's med bag. You refused to look at Diego and instead opted to wrap up the wave-induced gash on your forearm, but all Diego could look at was you.

A clenching feeling formed in his chest as your words rang through his head. Diego knew he wasn't your dad. He never touted himself as such and yet your words hurt him more than anything his own father had ever said to him. You only said it because you were lashing out, right? You were upset about your friends and so you were lashing out at others? That had to be it. Diego saw you lash out at Five, and you loved Five, so you were probably just lashing out at him too. Taking a step toward you, Diego reassured,

"I just want to take care of you..."

As Diego took a step forward, you took a step back. Finally looking at him you could see the hurt in his eyes. For a moment you felt your anger falter, but as you processed what he had just said, the flame reignited.

"Oh, now you wanna take care of me?" You question sarcastically before gesturing to Stan and Lila "How about you go take care of Stan because apparently the random kid that shows up out of nowhere looking nothing like you OR Lila is more important than the one you fucking raised!"

"Princess..." Diego cooed

"No! You don't get to call me that and expect me to just- to just run into your arms and say it's okay!" You rebuked before angrily questioning "Don't you understand why I'm upset?"

Of course he knew why you were upset, especially after the comment you had just made. It was the same reason that you were upset this whole past week. It had to be about Lila. Yes, she did try to kill you, and yes, she did show up out of nowhere again a few days ago, but a reaction this large seemed a bit much.

"Prin-(Y/N), is this about Lila again?" Diego asked

Lila? He thought this was about Lila? Sure, she tried to kill you which was annoying, and yeah, she did show up again without any real consequences for her actions, but this wasn't about her. And in that moment, you came to realize that none of it was ever really about her. These feelings took root not through her actions, but his.

"Oh my god! It was never about Lila! It was about YOU!" You snapped at him "God forbid I didn't want to see you as a bad person. I wanted a reason, a scapegoat, something to explain your shitty actions!" 

Your statement took Diego aback. What did you mean this was about him? What had he done? He was so confused, but he wasn't the only one confused either. Five looked over to Lila who was already looking over at him. She tilted her head to the side with a confused look on her face as if to ask him for clarity, but all Five could do was shrug. This was a new development for him too. Granted, it's not like you two had the time to talk about it either, but nevertheless, he knew nothing about this.

"I don't understand." Diego replied confused

You thought back on memories with Diego. So many of them that had once brought you joy or comfort now felt different. They felt tainted. You didn't know if you were finally seeing clearly or if your pain was causing you to look at them in a bad light. And then you thought about the day that Diego and Eudora split. How she wanted him to stop trying to be a hero and to focus on their relationship, and he refused. His desire to be a hero trumped his desire to be with her. All this time, did he ever actually care about you or was he only concerned about being viewed as a hero in someone's eyes? Lila was giving him the attention he had wanted from Eudora, and as of late, he seemed to focus more on Stan because Stan was focused on him. Your burning anger flattened into a calm rage. Your heart rate slowed, you straightened your posture, and your face showed no clear emotion as you looked Diego in the eye.

"I do. I see it so clearly now." You explained monotonously "You don't care about me anymore."

"What?! Of course, I do!" Diego exclaimed

Of course, he cared about you. Why would you say such a thing? You were his little sister. His princess! He had always cared about you. He didn't know what he had done to make you think otherwise, but it wasn't true. His bottom lip started to quiver as he wondered why this was happening.

Seeing the pain in his eyes, you started to rethink yourself. This was Diego. Your Eggo, your older brother. He was the one who came in the middle of the night to the academy when you were still hallucinating the young Umbrella Academy and made them go away. He was the one who comforted you when you had nightmares and held you til you fell back asleep. He took you to all your first days of school. He was there for all of your accomplishments. He took you to tour colleges. If none of this had happened then two months from now he would've been sitting at your graduation. No, you had to be thinking wrong. You were going to give him a chance, an olive branch, to prove to your broken heart and possibly clouded judgment that he did care about you. Taking a deep breath, you tried to center yourself before speaking. It was going to hurt to bring this up, but in your mind, it was the only way to know if he cared or not. Letting out your breath, you questioned,

"If you care about me then acknowledge Eudora. I just want you to acknowledge that she existed. That she was real and she was ours. I want you to remember what she meant to us, but you avoid the topic of her like the plague. So tell me, was she real to you like she was real to me?" You questioned

Diego looked at you blankly. He didn't know what to say. He wasn't prepared for a conversation like this. Not here, not now. He didn't want to do this. He didn't even know if he could.  

His silence didn't help you though. Why wouldn't he talk about her? All you wanted from him was to say something to show she was still in his mind. That the memories you created together were still there. Anything to prove he loved and cared for her and what you all had. Hurt bubbled inside you again followed by a slow anger. You needed an answer.

"Did you love her, Diego?" You pressed "Or did you stop caring the moment you couldn't be a hero to her anymore?"

Your questions weren't fair. He wasn't ready to speak about this, especially not with Lila around. He loved Lila. How could he have this conversation without the possibility of making her feel less than or secondary? This wasn't a conversation for her to be a part of. At least not yet. Why were you so determined? Why was this the hill that you had decided was so important to die on?

"(Y/N), it's-  it's complicated." Diego tried to explain

Complicated? How? Why? What was so complicated about remembering a person you loved? Anguish and anger swirled together as Diego's words, or lack thereof, affected you. Whatever composure you had tried to build quickly slipped away. Why couldn't he give you this? Why couldn't he even say her name? At this point that would be enough. Your throat and chest clenched tightly as if your body was caving in on itself, and tears streamed from your eyes as you wondered why he was hurting you like this?

"ANSWER THE QUESTION! DID YOU LOVE HER?" You demanded, your voice trembling as you begged for an answer, "DID YOU LOVE US?"

Diego looked at you silently, tears pricking his eyes, and the words he wanted to say caught in his throat. Of course, he loved her. He loved both of you. For so long, you two were his entire world. But he couldn't acknowledge Eudora. If he did it made her loss real. It made her death final. Even if he tried, he would never be able to forget her because you were so much like her. The way you cared for others, the way your face scrunched when you were upset, the joyful light in your eyes as you looked at him, and your resilience when things got tough. All these little quirks you had were glimpses of her. Looking at you was like looking at the last piece he had of her. It had been years for you, but it had only been three months for him. He couldn't do it. 

"(Y/N)- I-..." He tried to speak, his voice stuttering

But it was too late. He took too long to answer. And to you, that meant only one thing, he never actually loved you or Eudora. He never cared. All the things that he did, all of those moments of kindness were in search of admiration, not love. When you looked at him now, there was pain, and there was anger, but most of all there was resentment. You resented the fact that all these years, all those moments that you thought were genuine, were all just for a stupid ego boost. Your happiness never meant anything to him. And just like that your mood swung again, and your emotions disappeared. You felt nothing. You felt empty. You looked at Diego, with eyes that no longer had light in them and quietly stated,

"I'm glad she doesn't remember who I am because at least it means that she never knew you either."

Your words hit Diego like a ton of bricks. Not only because of how they impacted them but also because of the weight of what you meant. If she didn't remember you, that meant she was here. It meant she was alive. 

"She's alive? You saw her?" Diego asked sincerely

You didn't understand why he cared now? Now that she was possibly alive he wanted to acknowledge Eudora? What a selfish fucking prick. 

"I'm not going to tell you because you don't deserve to know her anymore. What I will tell you is that she loved you so much, but time and time again you choose to stroke your massive ego and play hero to others over the people already around you. And I know now that I'm not worth being around for when you have the amazing opportunity to play hero for these two."

"(Y/N), it's not like that." Diego responded

It was at this moment, knowing what Lila knew now, that everything finally clicked together, and she felt stupid for not seeing it sooner. As you had said, it was never about her or what she did. Except for trying to kill you and Five, but that wasn't the point. You had shouted that your parents were dead and that Diego raised you and she could assume that by extension this Eudora did too. Wasn't too hard to conclude that Diego had replaced your dad, and Eudora had replaced your mom. It was, mostly, never what she did that upset you so much, it was what she represented. Like your mini-Diego-looking friend said, she was a homewrecker, Diego was a traitor and they both were adulterers. He said those things because that's how you viewed the situation. You weren't a sister upset that her brother got a new girlfriend, you were a child watching their parent replace the other one. It was no wonder Diego was doing a relatively decent job with Stan, he had already done it before. With you.

However, you didn't want to hear what Diego had to say. You were done with him. Completely. In totality. Forever.

"You don't need to explain, because I don't need you anymore." You spat "I actually don't need anything from you anymore."

Pulling all the knives off your body, you tossed them to the ground in front of Diego. You had your powers, you didn't need some stupid knives to fight with. They didn't mean anything to you anymore. They were just worthless metal to you.

But to Diego, this was salt in the wound. These knives were gifts given to commemorate celebrations or important events. Birthdays, winning your first boxing match, getting your license, etc. These were the physical embodiment of his proudest days of you. Why? Why were you tossing them back?

"(Y/N), no..." Diego begged

"Go on, give them to Stan since he's the one you care about. I promise I won't get in the way of your happy little family ever again." You explained in a sarcastically cheerful tone before flatly stating "From now on, I only ever had one brother, and he died trying to keep me safe."

Hearing those words, Diego became paralyzed. It felt like time had stopped moving but that certainly wasn't true. Everything happened so fast and he didn't know how he got to this point. What had he done to cause this outcome? How many times had he unintentionally hurt you that now you wanted nothing to do with him? At that moment, it felt like a large part of him died because he didn't just lose you, he lost Eudora. The light In your eyes that you both shared when you looked at him was gone. How could he have let this happen?

Lila looked between you and Diego. He looked so broken...so defeated. She never wanted this for Diego. She might've disagreed with you, but she loved Diego and Diego loved you. Part of her felt like this was her fault, even if you said it wasn't. You were just a scared, hurt child looking for love, and whatever you were looking for you didn't get. And now, to you, all your parents were dead. In a way, Lila could relate. When she had lost her parents and was taken in by The Handler all she wanted was to know she was loved. But like her, you didn't get it, and now you were lost. Maybe there was a reason why these people loved you. Maybe she had misjudged you this whole time. Maybe you two were more similar than you were different. 

You however couldn't stand to be here anymore. This place felt heavy like an inescapable weight was crushing you. It was suffocating being in a place with so much misery. You needed to leave. Grabbing Dean's keys from the floor and summoning Viktoria's phone to your hand, you turned without saying a word and began to head to the front door. 

 Mimicking Five's powers, Lila jumped over to you and grabbed your wrist to stop you. Looking back, you expected to see your boyfriend but were surprised to see it was Lila who had stopped you.

"Where are you going?" Lila asked "The world is ending and you're a bloody mess. Literally."

"Why do you care?" You replied, "I thought you wanted me dead."

Right. Lila may have realized that your hatred was misplaced, but you had not realized that hers was as well. She was gonna have to work on that. 

Phasing your wrist through her grasp, you tried to walk away once more. You need to get away from this place. Away from Diego. Away from the Umbrella Academy and the end of the world. You weren't a hero. You were never meant to be a hero. Saving the world was never supposed to be your responsibility. 

You needed space, but the Hargreeves knew they needed you for this. Trying to get you to stop and reconsider Luther blurted out,

"What about the Kugelblitz? We need you to help figure out all the-the- y'know- your powers and stuff. We're family!"

Hearing that word you stopped in place. Family. How dare he use that word like some type of "gotcha". That word was supposed to mean something, and it did mean something to you. It meant so much more than just the definition in the book. It was a representation of all the people you had loved. All the people who you lived and fought for. All the people who had loved you to their dying breath. All the people who were now gone forever. To treat that word like a quid-pro-quo was like a slap in the face. You seethed at his negligence and slowly turned on your heel to face the Umbrella Academy.

"Family?" You questioned angrily "You use that word so frivolously. What do you know about family? What do ANY of you know about family?"

"I don't think I understand the question." Luther replied

"Of course you don't. Because you're all selfish, stunted, pathetic adults." You remarked spitefully "You don't view me as family. You guys only use the word family when you need something."

"That's not true. We're a family." Viktor retorted

"No you're not. You are a group of people who share a last name." You spat "You wouldn't know the first thing about family if it manifested as an entity and punched you in your fucking faces."

"(Y/N), you don't mean that..." Diego pleaded

God you were sick of these people! You said what you said and you meant it. They had no clue about what it meant to be a family. They had no respect for each other. They only ever came together to help each other when it was too late. You sacrificed everything for these people and none of them would do the same. They found out your parents died and they didn't care. They watched you struggle on the ground, bleeding and screaming, and they didn't step up. They saw all your friends vanish and offered no condolences. If you were in their shoes you would already been trying to help them, but they didn't care to do the same. You were done with them. Going on a tirade, you shouted,

"I DO! I treated you like family! I lost my parents, and friends, and the lives I built trying to help you all because I cared for you! I LOVED you! And besides my fucking boyfriend, who is the only one here who seems to care, none of you would do the same for me! The only one of you who ever genuinely treated me like family was Ben. And he's gone! I've lost EVERYTHING! I have NO FRIENDS! NO FAMILY! NO HOME! AND IT'S ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULTS! YOU RUINED MY LIFE!"

A heavy silence fell over the group as you caught your breath from yelling so much. To Allison, she didn't care much for your anger, you had no interest in finding her daughter so why should she care for your parents or friends? For Diego, this only worsened the heartbreak he already felt. He had failed you. And for Luther and Viktor, they felt like kids again, this aching feeling reminiscent of the day they realized you had disappeared along with Five. Their first friend, the first person who loved them for who they were, was lost again.

And then there was Five whose guilt had no bounds. He felt terrible seeing how upset you were, shameful that he couldn't prevent or change the events that led to this moment. The amount of pain you were going through was probably unimaginable, and even though you singled him out and separated him from his siblings as the only person who cared, he still felt guilty for his impact on your life. You had told him multiple times since he returned to you that you didn't blame him, but in a way, he was still the catalyst. That original time jump may have been an accident, but its impacts were very much real. You had put helping others first for so long that you never asked for help yourself. He wished he knew how to fix this. He had to find a way. 

Turning on your heel once more, you started to make your way to the doors again. You were getting out of here and nothing was going to stop you this time. Except that's never how it goes, does it? Immediately as you started walking away you felt a minor molecular disturbance behind you and someone gently take your hand. You knew who it was. It was the only person who could break your conviction. The only person who could make you want to stay. Slowly, you turned around to look at Five. His green eyes filled with sadness and concern as he looked over you. 

"Baby, please don't go." Five begged

God, why did he have to do this? Your heart ached looking at him. You never wanted your life with him to be like this. To be one filled with trials and tribulations. When you got real moments together everything was so beautiful, the world felt brighter, and your heart felt light. Why couldn't you just run away with him? Forget the world, cope with the pain of the kugel waves, and spend your last days together. Why did life have to be this way? Why couldn't you two just be happy? tears welled in your eyes once more as your strong composure quickly faltered.

"I can't do this..." you whispered, trying not to cry

"And I can't let you go..." Five replied desperately

"Th-that's not fair." You rebuked stuttering over your words "I-I let you go when I didn't want you to."

Five grasped your hand tighter. You were right, just a few days ago you were in his place begging him not to go, but let him anyway. He'd be a hypocrite to not let you do the same, but he just couldn't bring himself to do so. Looking you over, you were injured, bloodied, covered in gauze that was slowly turning red, and he knew for a fact you were not in a rational headspace. He couldn't blame you for any of it, the circumstances leading to this were out of your control, but his head was screaming at him to hold onto you. 

"What if something happens?" Five questioned concerned "Another kugel wave and I'm not there to help you? What if you-"

Five stopped. He couldn't get the words out. He shut his eyes tightly as he tried to push the thought out of his mind, but it was haunting. He lost you once before, he wouldn't survive if it happened again.

Five's grip on your hand tightened even more and you could feel the way his hand trembled as it held yours. You held his hand tighter and with your other hand, you reached up and gently ran it through his hair pushing it out of his face before resting it on his cheek. Your thumb gently brushed back and forth against his skin. You watched as he leaned into your touch more, even if most of what he felt was the gauze on your hand. You hated seeing him so upset. Back and forth your brain fought between doing what would make you feel better and doing what would make him feel better. That was the issue with loving someone so deeply, so desperately, you could never stop thinking of them. Five was a constant thought in your mind and loving him was like breathing air. But this hotel, these people, it was suffocating you. Your head wasn't in a good space, but you knew you couldn't do both right now. You couldn't take care of yourself and Five. It was one or the other and you had to make a decision. Gently, you brought his face closer to yours and pressed your forehead against his.

 "I need time, Five..." You whispered

"We don't have that." Five mumbled

"We never do." You quietly replied "But I still need it. I need to go."

Opening his eyes, Five saw the way you looked at him. Your gaze was gentle and sincere. Even through the chaos of your emotions, he knew that you still loved him. He could see it all over your face. And yet, that made him want to hold on tighter. Letting go of your hand, he wrapped his arms around your waist and held you close. 

Resting your head on his shoulder you let out a sigh. You felt like your heart was breaking and part of you started thinking that maybe you should put up with his siblings and stay. But then you thought again, and you knew that if you didn't get the space to clear your head then you wouldn't be able to do anything going forward. It pained you but you needed your space. You had to go. Lifting your head, you looked at Five once more.

"Please don't make me use my powers." You pleaded, tears falling from your eyes "Don't force me to slip away."

Five had no choice. He had to let you go because no matter what you were going to leave. It was what you wanted. All that was up to him was if it was going to be amicably or regretfully. Loosening his hold on you, Five sighed,

"Okay..."

You took a step back out of Five's arms. It was a bittersweet feeling. You didn't want to leave him, but you appreciated that he respected your wishes. Yes, you were forcing his hand slightly, but it did still show he cared. You wanted to give him something though, something that could perhaps ease the worry you knew he was feeling. Summoning the sharpie you saw Lucas put down earlier, you popped the cap off before gently pushing up the sleeve of Five's jacket and shirt. On his arm, you wrote down the number to Viktoria's cell phone, which you now carried on you, adding a little heart after the final number. Putting the cap back on the marker, you placed it into his jacket pocket. Looking up at him you explained,

"If it's an emergency, if you really need me, call this number and I'll be back as soon as I can."

Part of him worried that this was the last time he'd see you. That he was making a huge mistake. But he loved you and he knew you loved him. You had always managed to find your way back to each other so he had to trust that you'd come back again. Taking your face in his hands, he kissed you desperately, like it was the last kiss you'd ever share. If you were leaving his side then he needed you to feel how much he loved you. But he had to trust that this wasn't the last time. He had to believe that his lips would meet yours again.

You pressed your lips firmly back against Five's, the tears you had cried making the kiss salty. Your heart didn't want to leave him, but your head knew that you wouldn't be able to help him going forward if you didn't. It wasn't pleasant, but you swore once your head was clear, you'd come straight back here and into his arms. It felt like hell, but you gathered the strength to pull away. 

"I love you." You stated sincerely

"I love you too." Five quietly replied

And with that, you gave him one more kiss on the cheek before turning and walking to the doors. As you got to the revolving door though, you stopped and looked back at him to make sure he was still there. You loved him too much not to. You saw as he looked back at you and quietly mouthed the word go. With a small nod, you looked ahead and walked out the door of the Hotel Obsidian.

[queenshelby]

Chemical Reactions (P. 15)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy as J Robert Oppenheimer x Student Reader

Warning: Age-Gap, Infidelity, Smut

Words: 4,566

Note: The fic is spoiler free and my own fantasy and imagination. It is not historically and scientifically accurate.

Previous Parts: 1; 2; 3; 4; 5; 6; 7; 8; 9; 10; 11; 12; 13; 14

The morning after….

Early morning sunlight streamed through the sheer curtains covering the window in a room still somewhat unfamiliar to you. Even after six weeks, you were not used to waking up like this, next to the man you had unexpectedly fallen in love with.

You were still blissfully unaware of the new day's arrival, the sunlight falling on your face and illuminating your skin until you seemed to glow with the morning's light. As the early hours of the morning wore on, you began to stir, shifting your position repeatedly in the quest for comfort and a few more minutes of blissful unconsciousness.

But, your quest was abruptly cut short as you felt an alien sensation enter your world. At first, your mind, still clouded by sleep, could not identify it, and all you knew was that it was not Robert by your site.

It was a different feeling, almost like a whiff of air slowly following the curvature of your spine as it made its way down your back. Stopping at the small of your back, it would rebound, travelling upwards until it reached its starting location and began the process anew.

“Y/N?” you then heard a voice, quiet and nervous, and your quickly-wakening mind slowly came to grips with the feeling.

It was, indeed, cold air that slowly moved over your naked back as someone entered the room, quietly, ensuring not to wake you until they were sure it was you as you were facing the opposite direction.

“Lilli? What are…” you began to say, recognising her voice as you turned over quickly in bed, suddenly coming face to face with the source of your awakening.

“I hope you are well rested, Y/N, but you have to get up right now”, Lilli said, her eyes staring into yours with a mix of concern and apprehension.

“Where is Robert?” you asked, seeing she was in his house and knew about your relationship now as she stood in his bedroom, out of all places.

“In the lab, dealing with an incident,” Lilli informed you before throwing your clothes at you, which were found scattered across the bedroom floor.

“Another?” you asked, surprised, while quickly putting on your underwear, pants and blouse.

“Yes, but that is the least of your problems right now”, Lilli told you before informing you that, an hour ago, Kitty Oppenheimer arrived at Los Alamos and is currently undergoing the intake.

“Fuck”, you cursed before hurrying up and gathering your things quickly.

“Make sure you grab everything. Now hurry,” Lilli hurried you along, panicking and knowing very well that she should not be here at Robert Oppenheimer’s residence, warning his mistress, who happened to be her friend.

In Lilli’s mind, all this was disastrous, and without speaking to each other initially, you followed Lilli back to T-101 in haste.

Deep down inside, you hated Kitty being at Los Alamos and taking Robert away from you, but you also knew that she had every right to. After all, you were the intruder in their marriage, not the other way around. But then, there was Robert’s promise. He promised you it would just be you and him, and now this promise was broken.

That, of course, you knew was not his fault and yet, you desperately wanted his wife to go away and pretend for a bit longer than your relationship was what you believed it was. Robert was your lover and the one you hoped to be with for the rest of your life, and the thought of this prospect filled your heart with blissful warmth.

Being your friend, Lilli, of course, cautioned you, and just as you rearranged your things inside the small room of yours, she started to give you a lecture.

“Out of all men in Los Alamos, it had to be Robert Oppenheimer? Really?” Lillie asked seriously, seeing that Dr Oppenheimer should have been off-limits for you and anyone else. Not only was he married to someone else, but he was also the man in charge, and you could be seen as sleeping your way atop.

“Let’s just say that we have some history,” you told Lilli, knowing you could not lie to her. After all, she had just saved you from great embarrassment.

“So, you had an affair with him for a while then?” Lilli asked to which you took a deep breath and looked her in the eyes.

“We got involved with each other back at Berkley around five months ago,” you told her as you felt a wave of guilt overcome you, knowing that, what you were doing, was wrong.

“Are you in love with him?” Lilli wanted to know, and this was a question you had been dreading since the moment Lilli found out.

“Yes, which is ironic since, until most recently, I did not even believe in love, and I told him that. But then, I received letter after letter from him, and they changed things for me,” you explained, which Lilli took a moment to process since there had been rumours about these letters and some allegations about an affair. The women at the switchboards and in the correspondence review department liked to gossip, and while Robert used unofficial channels to contact you, some of them still knew that he had been seeing someone else. To Liili, there was no doubt that Kitty knew as well, which was probably why she was here now. She wanted to save her marriage; no one could blame her.

“Love is a fickle thing. You never know where you may find it,” Lilli said nonetheless, choosing her words wisely before telling you how she had found out about your affair with Robert Oppenheimer.

“Dr Oppenheimer wants you off the implosion research team as he is concerned about your exposure to plutonium. It was something he brought up with Hans Bethe and Teller yesterday, which made me wonder whether he took a particular interest in you and your reproductive health” Lillie chuckled before pointing out that she could also put one on one together. Your absence, flirting and long hours in the laboratory with no one but Robert Oppenheimer accompanying you gave it away, coupled with his worry and concern for you.

“He wants what?” you asked, interrupting her. You were somewhat shocked by Lilli's revelation since Robert did not bother to inform you about his conversations with Hans Bethe and Teller about pulling you off the team.

“Yes. Teller told me yesterday that you may be joining our team instead,” Lilli pointed out, to which you shook your head in disbelief. The thought of Robert betraying you like this left you nauseated again, and this nausea gave rise to Robert’s concerns in the first place.

“He may not be wrong, you know?” Lilli thus said before also telling you that you should get your health issues checked out as nausea is just one of the many signs of radiation poisoning.

“I do not have radiation poisoning,” you told Lilli while pulling your radiation tag off your pants and handing it to her.

“I had this scanned yesterday, and there is no radiation exposure. I am careful, and O told Robert this too,” you pointed out before grabbing some of your things scattered on your bed.

You then put your hair into a ponytail and washed down your face in readiness for work, although the laboratory was not the first place you were heading.

“Where are you going? We still have half an hour?” Lilli asked, seeing the anger and frustration written all over her face.

“Robert’s office because I am not abandoning my research,” you told Lilli, who was incredibly surprised by how confident you were.

“So, you will tell the project leader, Robert Oppenheimer, ‘no’?” Lilli chuckled, and you nodded.

“Yes, pretty much. I will tell him to mind his own business,” you spat before storming off, raging.

***

Several minutes later, you arrived at Robert’s office, but instead of finding him there, you saw only his secretary talking shop with Kitty Oppenheimer.

As usual, Kitty carried a flask filled with liquor and smoked a cigarette, looking elegant in a dress and wearing red lipstick.

Knowing that she was at Los Alamos, you expected to see her but did not expect to run into her at Robert’s office since the non-workings civilians were not usually granted access to the project side.

“Can I help you?” Robert’s secretary asked as you walked in, but before you could answer her question, Kitty took a good look at you and interrupted.

“Y/N Y/LN, is it?” she asked, pretending only to remember your name, and you knew that the truth was that she knew very well who you were.

“Yes, Mrs Oppenheimer. It is good to see you,” you lied, attempting to shake her hand, which was a gesture she refused.

“You look like a rag with dirty hands. I have no desire to touch them,” she said rather directly, causing you to swallow harshly.

“I seem to have a few issues getting the ink off my skin”, you said, seeing that your pen had been leaking for days and scrubbing them without success.

“Is ink what you are experimenting with?”  Kitty chuckled sarcastically, and whilst you wanted to respond with something like “No, I am experimenting with your husband”, you restrained yourself from doing so.

“No, Mrs Oppenheimer. But I do use ink to write down my findings. Would you please excuse me? I am here to see your husband,” you told her politely before looking up towards his office door, seeing whether he was inside.

“Robert isn’t here. I haven’t even seen him yet myself,” Kitty pointed out before sending you on your way, and it was not until this evening that you saw Robert again at a dinner party hosted by Hans Bethe and his wife, welcoming Kitty to Los Alamos.

***

Having worked with and studied under Hans, you were invited, and since you were desperate to speak with Robert, you attended.

You knew that, with his wife Kitty being there, you had to be careful and thus kept your distance from Robert the entire night until he eventually left the house to get some fresh air.

Pretending to need a cigarette, you followed him outside, and within less than a minute, you ended up inside the small laundry shed out the back where, hopefully, you could not be seen.

Just as Robert seized the opportunity and pulled you into the empty shed, however, trying to kiss you, you pulled away from him, and your hand slipped, leaving a red mark on his cheek.

“Don’t you dare, Robert?” you told him as anger filled your voice.

“I did not know that Kitty would come here. She said that she wouldn’t, but she changed her mind. Her mother passed away, and apparently, she needed a change of scenery,” Robert began to say, sighing deeply. However, you interrupted him again before he could finish his sentence, unwilling to hear any of his excuses.

“Robert, I am not angry with you because your wife is here. I am angry with you because you are pulling me off the implosion project without talking to me about it first,” you told him with great anger and, to your surprise, Robert cupped your face.

“Y/N, I am in love with you, and I am trying to keep you safe,” he told you gently while looking into your eyes again with his own, so blue that you could get lost within them.

“Fuck you, Robert,” you said nonetheless as, unbeknownst to him, you fought with yourself internally. It was the age-old fight between reason and desire.

“We had a deal”, you reminded him, and he had broken his promise to you.

“Does this research mean so much to you?” Robert asked, causing you to look at him with some confusion.

“Yes! Yes, it does,” you confirmed, and he nodded while approaching you like a punished dog.

“All right, I will keep you on the plutonium research for now, but I insist you take a medical next week. Are we clear?” Robert then told you with his eyes casting downward.

“Yes”, you promised him, smiling, but, unlike him, you looked straight ahead confidently.

“Now, do you forgive me, my love?” Robert was quick to ask, and you shook your head and smirked.  

“That depends,” you told him, pulling him towards you harshly while allowing yourself to lean against the sink behind you.

“This is not a good idea. We could get caught,” Robert cautioned you just before you placed your index finger against his lips.

‘Not if you are quiet”, you told him while relishing the heat of his body against your own. You enjoyed the hold you knew you had over him, and whilst you were still hungry for answers as to why he intended to pull you from your research project, you couldn’t help but feel hungry for something else as well. The feeling of your internal heat was intense, and you pulled him towards you more tightly now until you were pressed together, chest to chest, belly to belly, thigh to thigh.

For a moment, you were both silent, staring at each other until, with a great shuddering breath, you slid your hand between you, fumbling with his belt.

“What are you doing?” Robert wanted to know while he was under your spell all so suddenly.

“Reminding you of your promise to me,” you told him just as your nose touched his, and you tipped your face upward and into a sudden kiss, taking Robert by surprise.

‘My promise to you will stand, always and forever, because I love you,” he said after quickly pulling his lips away from yours.

‘Good, now show me how much you love me, Dr Oppenheimer,” you told him again as you kissed him, and, by this point, you were becoming increasingly desperate for his touch.

“I want you to fuck me. Right here. While your wife is in there, enjoying her martinis,” you eventually said lightly against his lips, smiling seductively before, finally, craving complete contact.

‘Then take off your panties”, Robert said as, at the same time, you slowly pushed down his pants, demanding more.

‘I am not wearing any’, you teased while lifting one of your legs and throwing your arms around his neck.

‘Now that is very naughty, isn’t it?’ Robert chuckled as he reached for the thigh of your other leg, lifting that one, too, before pinning you against the sink.  

“Your cum has been leaking out of me all day. It’s such a divine feeling, Robert,”  you told him before pulling his lips towards yours again while hanging suspended, pressed against the sink, with Robert’s hands beneath you, lifting your skirt.

As you were kissing, you tugged at Robert’s hair to better angle your mouth towards him, taking his bottom lip into your own and biting down on it, maybe a little too sharply, eliciting a huff.

‘Let me give you more then’, Robert said, and with this, he immediately stumbled forward even further, and your back hit the sink more harshly now, knocking the air out of you. With one hand under each of your thighs, Robert continued to support you between the sink and his hips, bones digging into you painfully.

‘I simply love having sex with you and filling you with my cum”, Robert told you as he pulled back from your kisses to make eye contact with you while getting rid of the last bit of fabric between your respective cores.

‘I know you do’, you teased before carrying on, demanding more as the heat ran through your belly, urgent, painful, like a steady electric current, radiating out from your core, already slick with want and need.

‘I am at your mercy, my love. You are who I want to be with. Always’ Robert said teasingly as his lips moved to your throat.

‘Then divorce Kitty. End your marriage for me,’ you said as you began biting Robert’s ear while he buried his face in your chest.

‘I will. Soon Robert groaned while lifting you up until he could bite at your breast through the fabric of your blouse.

‘Good’, you moaned, breath heavy like a horse at the races, sweat dripping from you both. By this point, you could also already feel the head of your lover’s cock pushing against you, and a sense of electricity shot upward through your belly and into your chest.

You squirmed, and Robert smirked as he suddenly pushed his entire length into you with one firm stroke.

You gasped and shrieked with surprise before you tightened your legs around him, and he pulled out slightly and started the steady rhythm, muscles flexing through his shirt under your touch.

‘I love you, Y/N. I will always love you,’ Robert groaned as he kept thrusting into you while kissing your neck.

‘I love you too,’ you responded nonetheless as you pulled Robert’s head back harshly, using the fingers that were already tangled up in his hair, causing him to hiss in discomfort.

‘And you are mine, Robert’ you then smirked before lowering your legs forcefully against his grip and pushing him away from you with ease.

‘I am yours, my love,’ Robert confirmed before reaching for your hips again and spinning you around.

You gasped as your hands landed on the flat of the podium in front of you, and he pulled you back towards him again before entering you from behind.

‘I will always be yours’, Robert told you, and, by this point, the hunger on your face was almost too much to bear as Robert was hitting that lovely spot of yours.

‘Oh god, yes’, you moaned. You were panting and crying out for him, speaking his name in the most passionate way imaginable. You were nearing your end, and Robert’s hand slipped around your waist, and his long fingers soon found your clit. Gently, he circled your soft spot while thrusting in and out of you, hard and deep, making your legs quiver until you suddenly heard a noise from outside the small shed you were in.

“Robert?” you heard Kitty call out, looking for her husband and, just as she did, his hand came down on your mouth.

“Fuck”, you cursed against his palm, stalling as you were so goddamn close when, abruptly, the door opened, and you saw her while she saw you.

“I can’t say I am surprised, but I am disgusted”, was all she said before turning around and walking away from you both, returning to the house while Robert pulled out of you and gasped for air.

“And now?” you asked, adjusting your skirt.

“And now I go home with my wife and child”, he told you before kissing your forehead, leaving you saddened. “I am sorry, my love,” he told you but all you could do was nod.