#last holiday is mother
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he is so important to me
#posts the same image 5 times yeah this is content . I am girlblogging queen matriarch boy#he’s happy!!!!!!!!!#for the first time in weeks after being overwhelmed and traumatized and depressed over his own guilt and actions#he’s happy!!!!!!!!!!!#extremely important#crying so much because . he’s so pretty and beautiful . and it means so much to me to see him smile after everything that happened …#eeuuuuugguhjjgg last holiday you will always be the jack episode of all time to fucking exisy#last holiday is mother#spn#supernatural#jack kline#spn season 15#15x14#spn 15x14#last holiday#dean&jack#very important for dean&jack as well yes#like I know the dungeon dialogue is kinda clunky and disjointed or maybe that’s just me#but they’re . they’re being stupid idiots together again#remembering when I called them fucking idiots duo .. real missing my guys hours …….
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Rewatched episode 9x17 yesterday evening with my sister (it's her first time watching) and when Dean is in the bar with Crowley and Crowley leaves to go to the restrooms, Dean spots a guy.
He thinks he is a hunter, but he is in fact working for Crowley. And I realized that the guy looks like Cas somehow. By that I mean he has blue eyes and dark hair. He tells Dean that his name is Jake.
So I thought, what if Dean talked to Jake to stop him on his way of killing Crowley differently. Listen to me. Dean has the Mark, he is on edge a little. So what if the guy provokes him more (he is working for Crowley after all). Dean could push him against the wall and Jake would try to kiss him, because why not, he is probably a demon but Dean doesn't know.
Dean would resist first, but there's no one there. Crowley flew away and won't come back probably. He needs to let go a little bit, because he is already fighting against the Mark.
Dean would kiss him back after all, pushing him further against the wall. Jake would push him away to go hide in a restroom. He would go down on his knees in front of Dean, unbuckling the hunter's belt while he'd look up at him with his bright blue eyes. Those seem too familiar to Dean and reminds him of someone.
When Jake would take him in his mouth and look at him with those same eyes, Dean would start thinking about Cas. And as he comes, he would moan Cas's name.
And then I thought, what if he would moan or think about it so loudly multiple times to the point where it ends up sounding like a prayer and Cas pops in the said restroom, seeing Dean eyes closed, teeth biting his lower lip with a guy kneeling in front of him.
#that's a silly thought#don't mind me#deanjake#is it a thing?#I mean probably#with spn everything is a thing#I could write it#if I had more time#I need holidays that last a year at least#if I want to write every idea I have about those two idiots in love#destiel#deancas#castiel#dean winchester#spn 9x17#Mother's Little Helper#my destiel fanfic
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🌊🌊🌊
The other people in the town square be like 👀
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#skylldraws#tododeku#one part emotion two part visual gag#how much influence did ouran host club have on my sense of humor you ask?#ah well…that’s a fair question#i posted my last update on Mother’s Day and now here i am on the eve of Memorial Day#aren’t the real holidays the tododeku we find along the way?#or something idk#tddk#tdiz#todoizu#tddk fanart#todoroki x midoriya#todoroki x deku#shouto x izuku#izushou#bnha#tddk au#tododeku au#quirkless deku#bnha comic#tododeku fantasy au#bnha fantasy au
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Lately I've been drawing Romcom Heroines ~ <3
#she's the man#last holiday#the house bunny#what happens later#my big fat greek wedding#queen latifah#amanda bines#meg ryan#anna faris#nia vardalos#my wives#mothers#i belong to them#toula portokalos
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I know that realistically William kept in contact with his family during the timeskip but like...what if he didn't?
#the last they heard from him he promised to go home for the holidays#he promised to stay safe#and then radio silence for ten months#they wonder where he is#they see the headlines#OVERLORD DEFEATED#they try not to think about the fact that the article says that one of the heros who accomplished this vanished after the battle#they try not to worry#meanwhile william stares at the contacts in his phone and can't bring himself to text him back#he cant respond to his mothers desperate messages pleading for his safety#jrwi#jrwi prime defenders#william wisp
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the mental illness is hitting right now……..
#I couldn’t sleep last night and my dad slept even worse because he accidentally woke up my mom#and she started yelling about how misogynistic it is to wake your wife up (????)#so he had to sleep on the couch#it’s a quarter to 1 and everyone is asleep right now but my mom#my cats my dog my dad….. me……..#basically if my mother has a problem it becomes everyone else’s issue#the vibes are calm and quiet but not positive it’s weird#easter is a shitty holiday anyway not gonna lie#not when you’re a little kid doing egg hunts or a very devout christian doing whatever it is they do i suppose#but we don’t really have any reason to celebrate so everyone’s just pathetically cooped up together
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I hate the commercialization of Christmas centered around present giving, that I am socially forced to buy things for both people I love and people I want to choke on a starburst. I hate the forced, fake cheer around as people pretend they’re being good and charitable by buying overly priced junk just to tick off a box on their to do list. I hate that most of the time, people are too stressed by having to buy so many people gifts that often they just buy whatever just to have something to wrap which the receiver doesn’t even want resulting in a circle jerk of stress for everyone involved with no net gain.
#christmas wank#anti christmas#christmas hate#i hate the holidays so much#i got the last of my presents yesterday and like the palpable Relief I felt#like I've been lowkey stressing since october about gifts#i hate that I have to buy my mother (who I'm one step above despising) a gift or else she throws a fit#I hate that I find fun gifts for my friends throughout the year but feel obligated to wait for a stupid manufactured holiday#I hate that in addition to buying presents i have to coordinate getting them wrapped and sent so they arrive on time#it just sucks! I hate it!#every year I tell my family 'can we just fucking skip presents this year??'#and every year my mom is like 'Im gonna buy you the best present you're gonna love forever'#and proceeds to buy the lamest most unlike me thing ever that I hide away immeaditely#i want to hibernate to january#fuck christmas#(and yet I am Winning at presents they're all super attuned to what people want)#(I hate the culture of present buying but I think Im good at it)
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And the world keeps spinning
#vent#mentions of death#but my friend who passed away whose birthday is today’s mother just texted me#out of the blue#she sent me a vid that reminded her of me which ?? ough :<#we hardly text. I can scroll back for years and it’s just us wishing each other happy birthday and other holidays back and forth#idk something abt her reaching out specifically today is destroying me#like hey been laying in bed for the last 24 hours thinking abt ur family hope ur doing well too#???#like how is any of this fair aaaa#ur child is dead and my friend is gone and yet the world keeps spinning
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shouldn’t have checked my bank account as expected my mother has taken thousands more dollars from my savings and has almost run me dry more or less. Cool!
#I’m going to fucking call the bank and ask about a second checking account because she’s never going to make her own fucking account#it’s been like a year since she said she would and it’s just not gonna happen#she owes me thousands of dollars via me paying her fucking overdraft fees and she always says ‘what you think I won’t pay you back?’ no!!!!!#no I don’t!!!!!!! because you literally never have!!!!!!!!!!!#and where the fuck are you going to get like 8000 dollars anyway. because that’s what she owes me at the very least#even if you want to factor in like. paying her monthly for the groceries she buys and cat food and whatever that’s still. thousands of#dollars. and the worst part about it is I just have no safety net anymore#because my savings is basically nothing at this point. like nothing that can help in a dire situation anymore.#I keep thinking about whatever im going to have to end up paying for top surgery and I WOULD have a significant amount saved up to#contribute to that but haha! no I don’t! it’s fucking gone!#and I’ve been getting paid basically fucking nothing lately because of how few hours they’re scheduling me so that does not fucking help#my last paycheck was literally like half of what I should be getting. I made like 1K in the past two paychecks. that’s fucking depressing#anyway I’ve given myself a headache#I’ve been avoiding looking at my bank account because I knew it would be bad and it’d stress me the fuck out but I also have been anxious#not knowing and my mother making a few vague comments that implied she must have fucked me over. so I checked today and yeah she sure did#if I don’t make a new checking account that she can’t access i am actually going to be broke within the nenxt few months at this rate#my head hurts and I am so upset I am so upset I work so fucking hard and it doesn’t even matter i just lose money constantly#I get nothing I just pay her fucking fees and pay for my tuition and pay for everything else of any significance#and I am not exaggerating I work my ass off. I am the only person I know at my job who begs to work holidays and extra days and stay as late#as possible and it . doesn’t even matter#im going to kill myself I swear to god. there’s shit I need to buy. what am I supposed to do.#kibumblabs#vent#like shit I need to buy for WORK. my manager is getting on me about not having proper shoes for example and yeah I can get a discount#through shoes for crews but I still dont have the fucking money for anything anymore#not unless I want to run myself into the fucking ground#I need a new binder badly. I need new black pants also for work since mine are so faded at this point.#I only have one fitted sheet that doesn’t have giant holes in it#I can’t stop thinking about my last paycheck it was literally the worst I’ve seen since starting this job a year ago. fucking infuriating
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WINNING DUO: Fanpage.it interviews Italian bronze medalist rhythmic gymnast Sofia Raffaeli and her coach Claudia Mancinelli
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translation by me!
interviewer: will you two stay together?
sofia: obviously, i hope so?
claudia: absolutely
claudia: yesterday evening i said “sofia, what shall we do? shall we already listen to the new tracks [for 2025 routines]?” and she said “of course!”
interviewer: when you lashed out at the judges, let’s say you hit the ground running. was it [the situation] different from what it looked like from the outside?
claudia: so, actually-
sofia: it’s not what it seems
claudia: it’s not what it seems, in the sense that after the mistake during the ball routine sofia did her clubs routine with such grit and determination, that afterwards i thanked her and told her “you were a lioness”. when i was watching her like that on the carpet, then when she walked out of it she had that really determined, convinced stare; she went and took what she wanted, because it was slightly slipping out of her hand. that awoke in me the same determination. i didn’t see eye to eye with the judges [on the score], so i went [to submit the inquiry], something natural, normal that we [coaches] do. that stare i had was one of resolve, of determination, reason why i was super concentrated and we couldn’t waste a single “focusing moment”
interviewer [to sofia]: i imagine it was an important gesture for you. you felt protected, supported, didn’t you?
sofia: i’ve felt like that ever since she [claudia] arrived, she’s always been close both to me and milena [baldassarri], as well as to the whole team [ginnastica fabriano], she always supports us through all struggles and she made me grow a lot in just a year.
interviewer [to claudia]: what’s the secret to preparing an athlete in such a short time?
claudia: the secret to bringing these athletes to such a high level, to such an important competition is serious working, for sure. concentrated, constant. you fall, but you get back up, multiple times; we told ourselves that we weren’t ready yet, so we started again. there were good and bad moments, but i’ll tell you - especially in this last month preparing [for the Olympics] - i had chosen not to go back home from a training in which someone wasn’t satisfied with the work, either me, her [sofia] or milena. leaving the gym like that, even if there had been a small, minuscule mistake in a routine, i didn’t want that. i wanted that both me and them went back home convinced that we were taking home the work of the day.
claudia: now sofia is forced to go on holiday, because you have to know that she would head back to the gym tomorrow morning already, wouldn’t you?
sofia: of course
claudia: you see, of course
interviewer: you’re a Stakhanovite
claudia: yeah, she works tirelessly - luckily, because that’s what a great athlete needs -, but some rest is also needed, so i hope she’ll now enjoy that
sofia: yeah, inevitably
#i am using all the wifi i can get from where i’m on holiday please bear with me#also- i saw people in the comments complaining that they didn’t mention cantaluppi so i’ll say it already#this blog is not cantaluppi-friendly soo you can happily avoid me if you like her or even remotely support what she did last year#i am a claudia worshipper#(my mother my queen my everything)#and i think you can see it clearly in the very first frames of this interview how sofi is glowing with her#sofia raffaeli#claudia mancinelli#olympics#olympics 2024#paris 2024#team italy#rhythmic gymnastics#my translations
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After years of begging and bribes... I'm finally going to the west end with my mum 🥰🥰🥰
#I don't mean to boast#But me and my mother haven't had a holiday with just the two of us ever#The last time I travelled with her was in 2015 for a family wedding#So I am very excited for this#It is for one night only#But hadestown#I cant wait to share that with one of the most important people in my life
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Ugh I was excited for today until I found out I'd have to spend it with people that actively make me hate being alive hate the future and drain me off all energy physically mentally spiritually like a vampire I can't stand to be around her she is the definition of stupidity and even then that's generous as fuck this bitch has filled her brain with so much garbage I watch her brain cells die at alarming rates every single time she uses her vocal cords her giggles make me want to jam a sewing needle into my ear repeatedly so I can never have to hear it again its a friendly reminder that my parents decisions this time my dad's constantly makes me want to die
#i cant even shes just so dangerously stupid#she thinks energy drinks with natural caffeine are safe to give people who have been told by doctor doing take caffeine with thia meds#ahe thinks of a child is CHOCKING to lie them face down n rub their back#she has the evangelical woman voice worse then women I've met n that cult ahe giggles constantly and behaves like the stereotype lil german#boy just got a lollipop over.... everyone and everything whe acts likw an 11 year old I just got the first boyfriend and all they could talk#is how perfect their boyfriend is and they're so pretty good for that I pulled a boyfriend is and it's like a God thing that they met how#SOOOOOOOOOO in love while constantly nonstop touching ahe has to be touching him her hand on his thigh her atm linked with his her heaf on#his chest she has to be in her lap they make out all over the place IT'S DISGUSTING AND EMBARRASSING STOP SWAPPING SPIT#she started a i. hwr words 'love diary of their love journey' they hadn't been dateing 2 months her kids are spoiled fake Instagram bitches#with such shitty views on politics SHE'S A TRUMP FAN GIRL SHENLOVES TRUMP MY DAD BROUGHT IN A TRUMPIE#there's so much i cant even say because even admitting it on tumblr is too embarrassing i wanted.to.likw her i liked her the first day but#THE MORE I GET TO KNOW GET THE MORE N MORE N MISS RED FKAGS#she threw away all my siblings clothes school books toys uniforms for sports their in toys i bought them that week make up jewelry#in the disguise of helping clean house#while i was at the hospital the kids call me in tears i call her beg her to wait and nope.ahe didn't i found the bags by the curb i brought#my dad sided with hwr because 'she didn't mean any harm she didn't know sje was throwing them away'#my mom hasn't bsen dead a year he started dating right after ahe died#hes talking about marrying this woman this woman who has never had an honest educated thought once in her life#WHO ASLO SPEMDA MONEY LIKE A DRUNKEN SAILOR AHE CAME FROM A WITCH FAMILY HER LAST TWO HUSBANDA WERE TOUCH SHE HAS NO KNOWLEDGE OF THE COMMON#SHE SPENDS LIKE SHE STILL HAS MONEY WHEN SHE DOSE NOT AND IT'S LIKE YOU DID NOT JUST SPEND OVER 180 DOLLARS N PASTRIES GOD#SHES SO FUCKIN STUPID AND EVERY HOLIDAY SINCE MY MOM DIED WVERY FAMILY GWT TOGETHER BECAUSE WE DON'T TALK OR.DO ANYTHING WITH MOM'S SIDE#OF THE FAMILY ANYMORE SHE'S THERE EVERY WINGLE MOTHER FUCKIN WEEKEND SHES HERE I'M EXHAUSTED SHES PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY DRAINING TO BE ARO#OUND SHES LIKE IF SOMEONE TOOK A GOLDEN RETRIEVER ON A DIET OF JUST FUCKIN COCAINE LITTLE GERMAN BOY WITH LOLLY AND CRUELLA DEVILLE AND FUSE#THEN TOOK A STRAW AND DRANK ALL THE SMARTS OUT OF THAT BEING#UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGH MY DADS GOIN TO NARRY RHIA BITCH SHES GOIN TO TRY TO BE A MOTHER TO ME AND MY SIBLINGS AND THEY'RE GOIN TO#be so fucked up because her kids are not ok SHE FUCKED THEM OVER BAD SHE HAS FOUR KIDS ALL ADULTS THEY'RE JUST WOW#I HATE MY LIFE I HATE WHAY FUTURE MY FAMILY IS GOIN TO BE THE GOOD THINGS IS I WON'T HAVE TO STAY I CAN GO N MAKE A NEW ONE WITH MY WIFE#FOR ME BUT MY SIBLINGS ARE FUCKED AND ANYTIME I WANT TO VISIT MY FAMILY YANDERE GOLDEN RETRIEVER BITCH WILL BE THERE WORMING HWR WAY IN#SHES CONSTANTLY CALLING N TEXTING MY DAD NONSTOP OF SHE'S NOT NEXT TO HIM AND IF HE CAN'T RESPOND INSTANT SHE FREAKS OUT N BUGS ME
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my brother is getting married this weekend and i'm! stressed
#just pray to whatever deity you believe in that my mother doesn't make a scene like she did the last time#i just know that if she does i'm gonna be the one that has to deal with it#doesn't help that it's her birthday this week AND mother's day this weekend#lotsa expectations! especially for a woman who gets real weird about literally every holiday#on top of that i haven't met like ANY of my brother's fiancee's family yet bc my brother couldn't be bothered#i've met her parents and brothers ONCE very very briefly#i understand that weddings are a chance for the families to mingle but like#i feel like i should've spent a little bit more time with them before the actual wedding lol#pray 4 me pls
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#so it’s late and I’m intoxicated and interested in sharing a secret that sober me would prefer I not share#but she needs to be more vulnerable and right now in this time the alcohol helps#just as a precursor- I’m a lightweight so I really haven’t had that much and I’ll be fine in the morning and also#my partner has a weird schedule and once or twice a week we like to have a drink or two and play video games or watch a show together#lately it’s been baldurs gate but tonight it’s coop stardew#anywayyyy~#sober Becca is too shy to say that she’s struggling a lot right now#I’ve been hiding myself away for a LOT of reasons for quite a while now and focusing on being the best mother/partner/homemaker I can be#but this has been detrimental to my friendships and spiritual life#as far as friendships go I feel like since I haven’t had the capability to be a really good friend to anyone since everything happened with#happened with dad*#that I shouldn’t be allowed to have friends at ALL#because if I can’t put 100% effort into my friendships even when I’m struggling I don’t deserve friends at all#but I have 3 very little kids and I’m pouring every last ounce I have into them#so maybe I can kind of have a pass and maybe I can have a friend sometimes?#as a treat?#because I love my family very much but sometimes I don’t feel like I’m a person within the family#especially during the holidays I feel like I’m merely playing the role of ‘mother’#idk…#this is rambly and doesn’t make a ton of sense#basically I’m wondering if I’m allowed to be lonely sometimes because being a mom is hard and lonely#or if I have to suck it up and wait until my kids are older to get to be a full person outside of them again#btw- this has nothing to do with them#my kids are my sunshine on the most cloudy day#they are so beautiful and wonderful and I am so happy I get to know them and guide them in life#it truly is a privilege#apparently I’m too long winded lol I just started talking about each of my children and what I adore about them#but it was too many tags and tumblr said no lol#oh well jsyk I’m crying rn because they are my pride and joy and even if I never have another friend again they are so so worth it
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Sibling keeps reassuring me that its definitely good. I need it to definitely be good i swear to gods
#i will be obsessing over this until 6pm friday (at which i'll be told what It is)#theyre not saying 'probably' or 'its good to mum' or 'itll be good for us' or 'itll be good eventually'. it will be good.#it will be good it will be good it will be good#(last time my mother had good news that required this sort of commotion it was the 3 hour moving house and our dad went apeshit)#(so forgive me for being a little apprehensive i promise its explained in my lore lmfao I NEED IT TO BE GOOD)#(AND EVERYONE WILL HEAR ABOUT IT IF ITS NOT)#its not moving house again and its not someone dying and its not someone moving in and its not someone suddenly getting a new job#it could be a fancy holiday. its related to my mum's inheritance finally coming in so it requires Money. either pet or holiday or caravan#pet or holiday or caravan. pet holiday caravan. pet holiday caravan. pet holiday caravan. pet holiday caravan.#and holiday and caravan are bittersweet bc i haven't had a good holiday in all my memorable years aside from cornwall#and caravan means. moving out. which is huge and scary and requires a lot of thinking and financial decisions and i cant really handle that
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i feel like something people don’t understand is that mayor holiday could easily be a generally bad and unlikable person while also holding nuance—this isn’t to say she won’t have any redeeming traits, but a character has the ability to be nuanced and 3 dimensional while simultaneously just… being generally unlikable and/or a bad person. example: azula, from avatar—personally i like her a lot as a character but does that mean i think she’s a good person or someone i’d like to meet? no. same with akito from fruits basket
she can also be sympathetic while… being generally unlikable! it’s possible! she can be abusive and cold and rude and also well written with explanations behind her actions and believable psychology. i trust toby fox to make a character like that, or even better! read tags for more rant
#also you can have the best intentions and end up abusing your child#that’s honestly my theory. mayor holiday is stressed and hurting so she becomes overbearing and difficult on her child to the point of long#-lasting harm#and that doesn’t mean she’ll be granted redemption. mothers like that often get softer as time goes on but this is usually a result of a#stubborn character and therefore change barely makes a dent in the relationship until years later#i’m the youngest child of my mother and i’ve gotten the best side of her#but i know it took her a long time to improve and she still makes big mistakes all the time#with me and my sisters#of whom got the worst side of her#i love her dearly but i recognize she’s not the best person ever and she’s made huge mistakes in the past#so yeah. mayor holiday may not get redemption in the 7 days of deltarune#but it doesn’t mean she’s 1d and her only traits are mean cold woman#deltarune#undertale#utdr#mayor holiday#rudy holiday#rudolph holiday#noelle holiday#deltarune noelle#noelle deltarune#deltarune theory#also i feel like saying she might be a straight up bad irredeemable person isn’t saying she’s evil or 1d#toby fox obviously doesn’t make characters like that lol#as a child honestly it doesn’t matter the intentions#your parent even YELLING at you repeatedly can be terrifying#god sorry i just wanna talk a lot abt how it’s so easy to unintentionally abuse ur child but#i’d just say the same things over and over again
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