#kingdom hearts textpost
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reverieofreveria · 2 months ago
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I already rambled about this in the comments of my last reblog but I cannot stop thinking about Goof Troop/The Goofy Movies in Kingdom Hearts.
Like obviously it would make absolutely no sense because the only thing more illogical than bumbling-single-dad-from-the-suburbs Goofy being a royal guard in an honest to god monarchy lead by Michael fucking Mouse that absolutely did not exist in Goof Troop or the Goofy Movies, is worst-dad-ever-for-like-two-decades-running and basically-just-an-extended-joke-about-scummy-car-salesmen Pete being a comic relief henchman for actually scary and iconic (well, in her source material at least) classic disney villain Maleficent. The only way this would make literally any sense is if they pulled a Timeless River (which would have unfathomable implications on the timeline that would only marginally make it make more sense and probably wouldn't be nearly as charming the second time around) or just straight up made it a parallel universe (which I wouldn't like because I need Kingdom Hearts Goofy specifically to have a son and I need that son to specifically be Max).
But if we ignore literally all of that we are left with the absolute best, most juiciest fodder for a KH world I can think of and I need it to happen so badly.
Obviously I need Sora and Max to meet but I can't decide which way would be funniest. Does Sora have no idea his friend of at least three years has an, at minimum, college aged son? Even better does Donald somehow not know this about his longtime colleague (and in this scenario does maybe Sora know but not Donald)? Or are they both fully aware and actively talk about how Goofy can't go two seconds without talking about his (fully grown) precious little boy that has literally never been mentioned in canon.
Also, how far are we going with this? Are we going to go off of Goof Troop canon? A Goofy Movie canon? Both? Are we including an Extremely Goofy Movie?
What's Petes's Family up to? They're not in the movies but they sure are in the KH world that exists in my head. Are Pete and Peg still together? (Wikis will tell you they're divorced but I don't think it's ever stated.) If they split was Petes's descent into villainy the final nail in their marriage's coffin?
What's P.J.'s relationship to his dad and what he does? I doubt he'd like it but there's a good chance he'd somehow get roped into playing a sort of henchman's henchman for his dad like the world's worst unpaid internship.
What about Pistol? She'd be around twelve or thirteen by the second movie and while I think she'd make an excellent slapstick focused henchwoman at any age tween-/early teenagehood definitely rivals preschool age (the only life stage we ever see her at in canon) for maximum annoying-little-shit energy.
Continuing with the first movie, I know most fans hated the rhythm games in Atlantica but I feel it might just be excused if you get to go onstage with Powerline.
You fucking know Sora is going to earn Bobby's trust and respect by enthusiastically participating in the dumbest shit imaginable, causing Bobby to, with the utmost gravitas, hand a can of spray cheese which then turns into a keychain. The Keyblade is called "Cheddar Whizzy" and if we're doing forms like in KH3 one of them will spray/shoot cheese (I'm imagining a Hunny Blasters kind of situation) that makes enemies get stuck together/to the floor.
Are Max and his friends able to fight Heartless and the like? You can damage enemies using your skateboard in KH so maybe something like that, or maybe they all have unique improvised weapons, or maybe we just say fuck it, hand those guys a keyblade, who cares.
How about we include the second movie just for fun? Sora at the College X-Games. Hell, Roxas at the College X-Games! Does this take place in a game where they're old enough for college or did they just lie about their age or did no one even bother asking? Who knows.
I want there to be a stupidly hard minigame where Beret girl makes you recite slam poetry.
The game's Kingdom Hearts villain realises there's no traditional fairy tale villain to be found here and has to team up with a fucking college frat. I don't know if it'd be funnier for them to be exasperated by this or for them to treat this with the same gravitas as they would a teamup with like Ursula or something (I think it mostly depends on how much leadership Bradley gets in this scenario).
I need there to be a bossfight against Tank.
I need to see Donald Duck cast Firaga on Bradley Uppercrust III.
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verathena14 · 8 months ago
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sorry i had to
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t-pose · 2 months ago
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kingdom hearts text posts number idk leave me alone
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allykakamatsu · 9 days ago
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Aka, do not ask because I do not know what possessed me to make this-
Masterpost
Buy me a Coffee
Commission Prices
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babymagi · 1 year ago
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sanitizarium · 1 year ago
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i got a total of 3 notes on the post asking if i should share these so im taking that as a yes ❤️ ive been redrawing kh textposts to help w my art block this ones my favourite
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mariyuuhh · 1 year ago
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kh shitposts 2
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her-stars · 6 months ago
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A date where we just play through the Kingdom Hearts games and dead by daylight <3
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autumn-may · 2 years ago
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Kingdom hearts textposts
Part 1 of ???
I have I think more than a hundred of these and they make sense only to me so sorry guys
my only purpose is to post my silly little images of my silly little people and that’s what I’m going to do
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iwoulddieforienzo · 1 year ago
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Lexeaus, meeting Repliku: really? Another one?? Do you even know how to handle children??
Vexen: hey! We raised Zexion, and he turned out fine!
Zexion: …I most certainly did not.
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thstarsofsilver · 2 years ago
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i'm reading crooked kingdom and kaz brekker is genuinely a comedy king
"i suspect you and your fjerdan might want something more to subsist on than patriotism and longing glances"
[about a literal child] "it was that or snap her neck and make it look like she fell down the stairs, wylan. i think i showed remarkable restraint. move."
HUMOUR
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dattosdan · 2 years ago
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The F is key: A crackpot Utdr theory.
So, hear me out... Frisk and Kris look very similar appearance wise.
Kris is an anagram of Frisk's name, except Frisk has an "F" in it.
F is the 6th letter of the alphabet.
6, is commonly associated with Gaster in utdr, it's kind of his number.
We speculate, the voice we hear at the beginning of the game, during the goner maker sequence is Gaster, hinting, that he was the one who called us here.
So, it can therefore be inferred that Gaster, was also the one who put us inside of Kris.
Due to all the callbacks to Undertale, and the fact that the soul seems to remember how to turn into yellow soul mode even without the cell phone, it's been speculated that the soul we control, is the same one we controlled in Undertale.
So, what if Frisk's existence, and us being inside THEM, is also due to Gaster? Hear me out some more:
They have an F in their name, which could maybe imply Gaster's involvement with them, maybe he even gave them that name.
If you believe the person speaking during the goner maker sequence was Gaster, then it sorta implies he can MAKE vessels for the player.
So what if... Frisk IS a vessel, specifically, a vessel meant to resemble Kris made by Gaster.
The goner maker avatars after all, no matter how you customize them, LOOK like Kris, albeit monochrome, so maybe he just likes them and their appearance for some reason, and wanted to replicate it for Frisk.
As for why he would do this?... No clue, Gaster is a very mysterious individual, we don't really know a lot of his motives for doing or getting involved with ANYTHING in the series, so trying to tie a motive for the possible creation of Frisk to him, would be impossible at this point, maybe in the future if we find out more about him...
So yeah, this theory has very little proof, other than implications of Gaster having involvement in a lot of soul stuff, and kris and frisk being WAY too similar appearance and name wise, the f in Frisk's name is what started this whole idea in my head in the first place.
Anyway, let me know what you think, sorry if this is a bit... all over the place. wrote this at 6 am, and no, I didn't wake up at this time, I can't choose when motivation calls lol.
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fishpeanits · 10 months ago
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「 ✦ Welcome to the waters! Let me get everything together… ✦ 」
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「 ✦ … Perfect! Please enjoy your stay! ✦ 」
this blog will be a sanctuary to be unabashedly silly and enjoy the beauty of the internet’s vast connectivity. wasting time chastising “cringe” behavior or arguing over petty discourse isn’t something fishpeanits tolerates. the internet has become a cesspool of hate, and fishpeanits will not let that infection spread to this blog.
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* . + What things does fishpeanits like?
› ACTIVE INTERESTS: FORTNITEEEEE, Stardew Valley, Baldur’s Gate 3, Super Mario Sunshine, Super Princess Peach, Super Mario Galaxy I & II, Bungo Stray Dogs, My Little Pony, Jujutsu Kaisen, Preacher’s Daughter / Ethel Cain, the MILGRAM Project, Fortnite, Ichthyology,
› INACTIVE YET SPECIAL: Tomodachi Life, Soulsborne (Dark Souls, Elden Ring, Bloodborne, Sekiro), Splatoon (I, II,III), Apex Legends, Boku no Hero Academia, Five Nights at Freddy’s, Ruby Gloom, Genshin Impact, Soul Eater, Earthbound, Fran Bow, Sally Face, OMORI, Ensemble!! Stars, Project Sekai, Banjo Kazooie, Botany, Kingdom Hearts, Sonic the Hedgehog,
fishpeanits can be quite forgetful. this list is subject to change. - . *
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* . + What kind of content will fishpeanits post?
› #.fshits will be a collection of miscellaneous textposts and such that have no real category!
› #.fshart will be the tag used on any and all art!
› #.fshfic will be used for literary pieces! this will probably be fanfiction in most cases.
› … a special fourth item will be posted here! how invigorating!
do you trust the strangers you glimpse through a screen? fishpeanits wouldn’t. - . *
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* . + What kind of people should NOT expect to be welcomed here?
「 ✦ Some of these things should be common sense, really, but they will be listed regardless. Blocking people is a blessing! ✦ 」
› PEDOPHILES { This INCLUDES: DDLG, DDLB, MDLB, MDLG, MAPs, Proshippers, etc. } and any defenders of lolicon/shotacon/pedophilia in media.
› RAPISTS and any defenders of: “Consensual-Nonconsensual”, rape “jokes”, or victim blaming. Anyone who forgives rapists.
› ZOOPHILES and any defenders of zoophilic behavior.
› Anyone who villainizes mental illness or, conversely, romanticizes/idolizes it.
› Supporters of the United States government, the Israel government, etc.
› People who focus their “activism” on petty discourse (pronouns, slurs, etc.) OR use “activism” as a means for social media fame/profit
› NFT community
› … More to come as items are remembered.
to bring it to a close, a final note . . . remember to be skeptical. do research. being well-informed is crucial in the modern world. - . *
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drunkfinalfantasy · 6 years ago
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I’ve never seen them in the same room together, have you? 
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khmemeries · 2 years ago
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Original
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mariyuuhh · 1 year ago
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i love sora kingdomhearts and i wholeheartedly believe that he solos half of the ff-verse, but let's be real here, taylor swift would absolutely BODY him. just erase him with one all too well (10 minute version) (taylor's version) (from the vault). squash him with a single my tears ricochet live from the eras tour performance. and then proceed to laugh in a mastermind, 1.8 meters tall (WHAT THE FUCK ARE FEET AND INCHES) sort of manner.
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