#kevin x tess

[mariatesstruther]

thinking of an au where maybe joel/tess get to jackson first like before tommy

maybe joel and tess meet ellie as a younger girl like age 5/6/7 and they become a lil family and head out of boston because the QZ is getting bad with things heating up between fedra and the fireflies

there’s no immunity situation but she’s in a bad way in boston, something with her family maybe being fedra or her being targeted in school. she’s been getting food and meds and love from joel and tess for months or maybe years. anyway, they get her out of there and decide to head out to someplace that tess has heard about through the grapevine, rumored to be a safe haven somewhere in wyoming

they go through some shit but they survive and they get there. and at the gates they’re told to wait to meet a woman named maria, who will apparently talk to them about the conditions of being let into jackson—turns out maria is maria simone, tess’s fuckin college roomates, soul-sister, sometimes referred to as “long-lost love.” her joel and ellie are let in and welcomed immediately, to the dismay of nobody because they all love and trust maria—besides maybe seth, but who cares. fuck seth

tess and maria catch up as she guides them through jackson, telling them about how her and her father had escaped to this place with her son after leaving a fucked up QZ, much like them. now her and kevin and hank are here trying to maintain some semblance of normalcy and safety for people here in jackson

tess and joel and ellie get settled in a house and for a week are two are just left alone to get eachother adjusted, which is surprisingly easy for ellie—by day three she has managed to find a way to pillow-sled down the stairwell without breaking her own neck, which to her means it’s definitely 100% safe. joel and tess find themselves slipping into the routine of parenting, and after maybe a month manage to consider themselves living in whatever “domesticity” means nowadays

joel finds himself desperately missing tommy, who left to join the fireflies five years earlier and hadn’t radioed him back in one. tommy and him hadn’t left off on good terms, but they’d always respected their promise to eachother to keep in contact at least once a couple of months—since tommy went radio silent, joel has always had the gut-wrenching fear that he was dead. when ellie came along, the dull, old ache pressing on his chest somewhat eased, distracted by the warmth of loving his child with tess

but now, in jackson, where he had more time and space to think—he found himself wondering more and more where the fuck tommy could be, if he wasn’t dead, which—maybe he isn’t? there’s a chance, isn’t there? one of jackson’s conditions was that nobody but radio patrol had access to contacting people outside directly, and he’d of course agreed for the sake of staying with tess and ellie—so who says maybe tommy isn’t also in a situation where he just can’t get to joel? he doesn’t say anything, but he hold out hope

then five years go by

ellie is now 10/11/12, and hands down the most mischievous little rascal anyone in jackson’s ever seen. one day when she’s out with her cousin kevin (how exactly he’s her cousin is kinda complicated, but that’s just how things are with the miller-servopoulos-simones)—or, technically, he’s out with her, because earlier he headed out on a solo patrol to check a trap near the south border-walls and caught her sneaking her way back from her secret toad pond. she knows she’s not supposed to go out there alone, and she usually doesn’t—but today kev was busy, and mom and dad were both out on a three-day group hunt, so even if she did get caught she’d have a couple days of free before they’d hear about it and get pissed off. she took her chances, and had made it out and back unscathed like always—except, of course, getting snuck up on by kevin maybe 15 yards from her sneak-back-in-point at the south wall (“yo, rascal, whatcha doin—?” “AHH, FUCK—!” “OW, ELLIE, shit—! it’s me, wait!! it’s me! don’t hit me!” “what the hell, dude!!! you scared me!” “what the hell, you! you know you shouldn’t be out here alon—!” “i was already on my way back—!” “were you goin out to see the fuckin frogs, ellie?? again??? i told you, it’s a short way but anything could—!” “oh, whatever, i was fine! and you were busy!” “i told you i’d be back in four hours!!! you couldn’t just wait four hours????” “no!!!! and you know that!!!!” … kevin sighs. he does know that.)

and so they’re bickering about something stupid like usual—whether sweet or regular potatoes are better, who’s scarier between joel tess or maria when they’re pissed, which is better between star wars or jurassic park; the usual—when they hear a pined groan over from somewhere near, low to the ground

guns go up. footsteps creep silently. even though ellie’s young and mischievous, she’s also one of the fiercest kids in jackson anyones ever seen. her and kevin approach a man on the floor in  disheveled, torn up, cargo wear, seemingly delirious judging by the slur of his words and the bloody headwound

“jesus,” ellie says, voice a perfect lil blended imitation of joel and tess. “the fuck’s wrong with him?”

“he looks half-dead. clearly dehydrated and sustaining multiple injuries,” kevin evaluates neutrally; his mother always reminded him to be careful and cautious around people that appeared to be hurt or sick, and to be especially frugal with his sympathy. at the sound of another small, pained groan, he raised his gun to point between the man’s eyes and stepped closer, subtly trying to block ellie. “yo, dude. you waking up?”

“you sound so lame saying that,” ellie comments, because of course she does. she keeps her gun and interested eyes trained on him but stands away carefully, and kevin finds himself feeling extremely proud of her. “who say’s ‘yo, dude’?”

“i do”

“exactly. only you.”

“shut up, you little punk. what am i supposed to say?”

“something cool, obviously. we gotta scare him! here, like this—,” she clears her throat and turns her full attention back to the guy on the group with the mustache, raising her gun between his eyes like kev as she regard him with a louder, commanding voice. “wake the fuck up, motherfucker! hands where we can fuckin see em! you try anythin, ill fuckin gut you, you hear me?!”

“jesus, dude.”

“what?? look! it’s working!”

“where the fuck did you even learn—just stand back, okay?” kevin is a bit more serious now, looking down into the man’s now open eyes and finding himself struck stunned for a millisecond by a sense of strange familiarity. “hey, man, wake the fuck up. you with me? look here, buddy. just tell me your name, and what you’re here lookin for.” it was a familiar command he’d heard a hundred times from her mother, in a myriad of different contexts, but all with the same goal—direct interrogation

the man blinks at him, seemingly still disoriented, and winces as he moves to speak: “tommy. my name is tommy miller, and i’m lookin for my brother joel.”

for @clickergossip and @bumblepony and @liveandletcry23 and @bearrycool and @maddiesbooknook who i feel like are always writing stuff for or to inspire me 🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

[milliondollarbaby87]

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (2024) Review

The titans that are Godzilla and Kong must actually work together to protect their own existence as well as the world when a deadly threat which was deeply hidden begins to resurface. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Continue reading Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (2024) Review

[laderniereseancedecedrique]

GODZILLA X KONG : LE NOUVEL EMPIRE (2024)

Trois ans après avoir vaincu Mechagodzilla, Kong a établi son nouveau territoire dans la Terre creuse et recherche d'autres individus de son espèce. À la surface de la Terre, Godzilla continue de maintenir l'ordre entre l'Humanité et les monstres géants, connus sous le nom de « Titans ». Il affronte ainsi Scylla à Rome avant de se reposer au Colisée.

Un avant-poste d'observation de Monarch stationné dans la Terre creuse capte un signal non identifié. En surface, le signal provoque des hallucinations et des visions chez Jia, la dernière survivante connue de la tribu Iwi de Skull Island, ce qui inquiète sa mère adoptive, le Dr Ilene Andrews. Elle fait donc appel au podcasteur conspirationniste, Bernie Hayes, basé à Miami. Détectant également le signal, Godzilla quitte Rome et attaque une centrale nucléaire à Montagnac en France pour absorber les radiations. Godzilla se dirige ensuite vers le repaire du Titan Tiamat dans l'Arctique. Monarch pense que Godzilla se renforce pour faire face à une menace imminente.

Lorsqu'un gouffre s'ouvre près de chez lui, Kong découvre une région inexplorée où une tribu de son espèce a survécu, dont un juvénile nommé Suko. Après une première confrontation, Kong force Suko à le conduire au repaire de la tribu, et les deux se lient lentement d'amitié au cours de leur voyage. Le chef tyrannique de la tribu, le Skar King, combat Kong avec l'aide d'un ancien Titan propulsé par la glace, Shimo, que le Skar King contrôle avec douleur à l'aide d'un cristal. Le souffle glacé de Shimo endommage le bras droit de Kong, provoquant des engelures, mais avec l'aide de Suko, Kong parvient à s'échapper, bien qu'il perde sa hache dans le processus.

Andrews et Jia, aux côtés du vétérinaire Titan Trapper et Bernie Hayes, se rendent sur la Terre creuse pour localiser la source du signal. Ils trouvent l'avant-poste de Monarch détruit. Alors que le groupe s'aventure vers l'avant, ils découvrent un temple qui les mène à une section souterraine abritant une tribu Iwi survivante, qui communique par télépathie entre eux. En inspectant quelques ruines, ils supposent que le signal était un appel de détresse télépathique envoyé par les Iwi.

Tout en observant Jia socialiser avec les Iwi, Andrews exprime ses craintes à Trapper que Jia puisse choisir de rester avec son peuple et qu'Andrews devrait l'accepter. À l'intérieur d'un temple, Andrews découvre des hiéroglyphes affichant le passé et le futur : le Skar King a tenté une fois de conquérir le monde de la surface et a mené la guerre contre l'espèce de Godzilla, mais Godzilla l'a vaincu et l'a piégé, lui et sa tribu, au plus profond de la Terre creuse. La prophétie indique également que Jia serait la clé pour réveiller Mothra. Détectant Jia, Kong localise le temple et est équipé par Trapper d'un prototype d'attelle de bras exosquelettique pour renforcer et guérir son membre gelé. À leur insu, l'un des loyalistes du Skar King les a suivis et informe le Skar King, qui rassemble sa force d'invasion pour la Terre. Jia réveille avec succès Mothra renaissant.

Godzilla tue Tiamat et absorbe le rayonnement cosmique de son antre, le faisant évoluer et rendant ses plaques dorsales magenta. Dans l'espoir d'attirer Godzilla sur la Terre Creuse pour l'aider, Kong fait surface au Caire et appelle Godzilla. Malgré les tentatives de communication de Kong, un Godzilla en colère l'attaque et un bref combat s'ensuit jusqu'à ce que Mothra arrive avec Jia et convainc Godzilla d'aider Kong. Le trio se dirige ensuite vers la Terre Creuse pour affronter le Skar king avec Shimo et son armée. Le combat entraîne Godzilla, Kong, Shimo et le Skar King à Rio de Janeiro, où Shimo commence à provoquer une autre ère glaciaire sous les ordres du Skar King. Les factions sont à égalité jusqu'à ce que Suko arrive avec la hache de Kong et détruise le cristal contrôlant Shimo. Shimo et Kong gèlent alors le Skar King et le brisent.

Après avoir défait la période glaciaire de Shimo avec son souffle atomique, Godzilla retourne se reposer au Colisée. Jia retrouve Andrews et apaise ses craintes en choisissant de rester avec sa mère adoptive. Mothra restaure la barrière protectrice de la maison des Iwi puis s'en va. Kong revient avec Shimo et Suko sur la Terre Creuse, où il devient le nouveau chef de la tribu des singes.

[pedrospatch]

to do the right thing l part iii

Post Outbreak!Joel Miller x Pregnant! Female Reader

series masterlist

summary: You go into labor earlier than expected in the QZ; Joel and Tess help you deliver the baby; after giving birth, you and Joel follow through with a heartbreaking decision.

warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. BOSTON QZ ERA. ((TW)) PREGNANCY, mentions and references to adoption. mentions of dead bodies, child death (not what you think), descriptions of childbirth. angst. soft, protective Joel.

word count: 7.9k

a/n: Please do not hate me. That is all. (:

June, 2020

 Disposing of the infected was a shity job.

But then again, most of the civilian jobs in the Boston QZ were pretty fucking shitty.

Still. This particular one had to be the absolute shittiest of the shitty.

Having to haul dozens upon dozens of dead bodies, the accidental inhale of soot and smoke even through your makeshift mask, not to mention, the nauseating smell of burning human flesh—you’d hated getting assigned to this work detail before, but now that you were only just a few weeks shy of being nine months pregnant, it felt like actual fucking hell on earth. And, to make matters even worse, Joel had been asked by one of the officials to head over to a different site and work a different job at the very last minute. He wasn’t by your side to lend you a hand like he usually did. Before being forced by authorities to leave the site, Joel instructed you to find a familiar face and do whatever you could do to get someone to help you when you needed it.

Luckily, on the other side of the open fire pit, you’d spotted Kevin. A younger man in his early twenties, you knew Kevin was something of an avid pill popper and one of Joel’s secret regulars. In exchange for a couple of oxycodone pills that you produced from the pockets of Joel’s jacket you were wearing, he had agreed to help you haul the heavier bodies and toss them in the fire pit.

“You know, you used to be real strong,” Kevin mused out loud as he took the shoulders of a heftier male body. Through a labored grunt, he continued, “You never needed anybody's help.”

You narrowed your eyes at him as you took the lower half of the body into your arms, taking subtle care not to strain yourself to the point of hurting yourself—or the baby. “Shut up and move, Kevin.”

“I’m just saying.”

“Seriously, Kevin,” You managed to say to him through gritted teeth as you helped him carry the body. “I’ll throw in another fucking pill if you just shut the fuck up, how about that?”

“Never used to be so cranky, either. Jesus, Miller’s really rubbing off on you, isn’t he?”

Ignoring him, you inhaled a deep breath, exhaling it as you two lifted the body and flung it into the pit. As you turned back towards the canopied pickup truck for the next one, your eyes fell on the tiniest little body that you had ever seen and you simply froze, a chill running up the length of your spine.

While it wasn’t the first time that you’d ever had to dump the body of an infected child, this one had to be the smallest—the youngest. Though his head had been covered with a brown, burlap sack just like the rest of the bodies, anyone with two fucking eyes and half of one brain cell could guess that he was, at most, around the age of a toddler.

“Jesus,” You whispered, noticing the dirty, bloodied white bandage around his teeny little arm. That’s where he’d been infected.

Kevin’s voice came from behind you. “Oh come on, this can’t be your first time seeing a kid, right?”

Your mouth had gone as dry as sandpaper. “I—I’ve never seen one this young,” You told him, feeling your heart sink into your stomach. “He couldn’t have been older than three or something.” Unable to fathom what had to come next, you turned to Kevin and shook your head. “I’ll need you to do this one. I just can’t.”

“Sure thing, sweet cheeks.” He raised an eyebrow and looked around before lowering his voice. “Just as long as you go back home tonight and let that guarddog boyfriend of yours know how much I helped you out, you know, since he wasn’t around to do it himself.” He paused, his beady, dark little eyes twinkling in sheer delight. “Maybe a two for the price of one discount during our next business transaction would be an appropriate way for him to show me some gratitude?”

If Joel could see the smirk on Kevin’s face, he’d knock it right off with his fist.

“Greedy motherfucker, aren’t you?” You muttered under your breath, before finally nodding your head in agreement. “Fine. I’ll make sure Joel hooks it up on your next deal.” Fat chance of that happening.

Satisfied, Kevin grinned and pushed past you, picking up the child’s body.

Unable to bring yourself to watch him toss it into the roaring flames, you hurriedly walked around to the side of the pickup truck, yanking down the red bandana you used as a mask down from over your nose and mouth. Placing a hand on the side of the truck, you hunched over and closed your eyes for a brief second. “Jesus Christ,” You groaned in a whisper to yourself. “I think I’m going to be fucking sick.”

You half expected to toss your afternoon crackers right there onto the pavement in front of you. However, instead, just a split second later, you felt a sudden cramp in the middle of your pelvis—subtle, but still enough to make you wince. It was immediately followed by a feeling of intense pressure between your legs. Before your mind could even wrap itself around what was happening, there was a gush between your thighs, and warm liquid started trickling down the sides of your legs.

Shit.

Terrified, you glanced down.

Though they were dirty, you could distinctly see the wet patches on your faded, dark blue jeans. “No, no, no. This can’t be happening. It’s too fucking early—”

“Hey! What the hell are you doing over here? Who the fuck said you could stop and take a break?” One of the FEDRA officials who had been assigned to stand guard at the work site came up behind you, his weapon gripped tightly in his hands. When you whirled around to face him, his eyes fell and instantly noticed your soaked jeans. A look of disgust crossed his face. “Jesus. Did you just fucking piss yourself?”

“No—” You stopped yourself, realizing this could be your ticket out of there. “Yeah,” You replied, nodding your head, causing him to let out a repulsed noise. “Sorry. I just saw a little kid, must have made me—”

He held up one of his hands, stopping you. “Save it. I don’t give two shits,” he told you with a shake of his head. “Get your ass home right now and change your clothes, then come back. Make it quick. There’s still a lot of work to be done around here. Understood?”

You nodded again. The muscles in your pelvic area tightened and the feeling drew the tiniest of sharp breaths from you—your contractions were starting. “Yeah,” You managed to say to the official, keeping a straight face. “I’ll be back as fast as I can.”

He dismissively waved you away with his weapon and then stalked off back over to his post.

Letting out a small sigh of relief, you turned on your heel and started to make your way back to the apartment as quickly as possible.

Although the building was about a mile and a half up the road, it felt like you were trekking your way across the fucking country. You felt two more contractions along the way, and while their intensity was still pretty low in such an early stage of your labor, they still hurt like hell. They started around your lower back and gradually moved around to the front of your pelvis. You tried to push past the discomfort in order to get home as quick as possible, but every now and again, you found yourself having to stop in the middle of the sidewalk for just a brief second or two, only long enough to recollect and remind yourself that you needed to get a goddamn grip before someone noticed your strange behavior. Once the building finally came into your view, all you could do was silently pray that by some fucking miracle, Joel would be up there in that apartment, home from work detail.

Your prayer went unanswered.

When you opened the door to your quarters and walked inside, you’d found Tess home by herself. She was sitting at the table, sipping on a glass of whiskey and mindlessly flipping through a decades old newspaper.

“Tess,” You said her name, causing her to look up. “Where’s Joel?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“It’s fucking happening.”

Tess stared at you, her eyes widening slightly. “Wait, what?”

“The baby’s coming,” You informed her, pointing down to your damp jeans. Though you were panicking on the inside, you tried your best to remain as calm as humanly possible. “Where the fuck is Joel?”

Tess tossed aside her newspaper and stood up from the table. “I told you, I don’t know. I know he was reassigned but I’m not sure where—he sure as hell wasn’t with me.” She walked over to you, taking you by the elbow. She pulled you over towards the couch and helped you sit down. “I thought you said it would be at least a few more weeks before the baby came.”

You couldn’t help but shoot her an annoyed look. “Well, he’s coming now, Tess. And there’s nothing I can do to stop it.”

“How long ago did it start?”

“About half an hour ago, maybe. I was at the pits and my water broke after I saw—” You trailed off, deciding the details of what you had seen back at the work site weren’t necessary to disclose to her. “I’ve had a couple of contractions, but they’re pretty far apart.”

“It could be several hours before the baby comes, but there’s still no fucking way that we’ll be able to get you over to Bill and Frank’s in time.” Tess chewed anxiously on her bottom lip as she wracked her brain for any other possible options—it took her mere seconds to realize that there weren’t any other options. “You’re going to have to give birth here.”

“Fantastic,” You deadpanned, leaning back into the couch.

“Okay, here’s the deal. You stay put and I’m going to go out and find Joel. I know there’s a couple of places where he might have been assigned and if I’m right, I can be back with him quickly.” Tess pulled off her watch from her wrist. It was old and cracked, but otherwise, it still worked fine. “I need you to time your contractions. Try and be as accurate as possible.” She then reached into the back pocket of her jeans, producing a red handkerchief.  She handed it to you along with the watch. “Listen. I know it’s going to hurt like hell, but you need to be as quiet as possible. Last thing we need is for someone to hear you and come running in here, especially while I’m gone. If you need to, you bite down on this to keep quiet, alright?”

You swallowed harshly, taking both of the items with nearly trembling fingers. “Alright.”

“Don’t worry. I’m going to find Joel and we’ll be back,” she promised you. “You stay right here, okay?”

“Because I’m such a fucking flight risk right now?”

“Even during labor, you’re still a fucking smartass, huh?” Tess rolled her eyes and reached for her jacket. 

You watched her as she readied herself to take off. “Tess?”

“Yeah?”

“Hurry. Please.”

“Fuck,” You hissed, both of your hands planted on your lower back as you paced back and forth in the kitchen, trying your best to breathe your way through another contraction.

 It had been over an hour and a half and Tess still hadn’t returned with Joel.

Your labor was progressing a lot quicker than you’d anticipated and while it could still be at least a couple more hours before the baby was born, you were still terrified at the mere thought of having to deliver him alone. You needed Joel—you didn’t want to have to do this without him.

“Jesus, fuck,” You cursed through clenched teeth. The waves of pain that were coming at you were almost enough to physically knock you off of your feet and right onto your ass. Tess had been smart to give you her handkerchief. During one particularly painful contraction, you’d shoved it into your mouth, muffling your cries of agony.

Another hour had passed and you were genuinely starting to believe that you were indeed going to have to give birth to the baby all alone in that apartment. “Where the fuck are you guys?” You mumbled to yourself. Perhaps something had happened to them—Joel and Tess had spent ample amounts of time in FEDRA lockup for the stunts that they pulled and it wouldn’t surprise you if they had gone and done something stupid, putting themselves behind bars for the night.

In an attempt to keep your mind from continuously wandering to worst case scenarios, you walked over to the kitchen sink and quickly filled up a large, chipped porcelain bowl with water. You rummaged around for the cleanest washcloth that you could find and then picked up the bowl in your hands, taking care not to spill as you hastily made your way around the single wall that divided the kitchen from the bedroom. You placed the bowl of water on top of the old, cherrywood dresser that separated yours and Joel’s bed from Tess’s bed and immediately started peeling off your dirty clothes. Wanting to hurry before another contraction came along, you dipped the cloth into the water and started running it all over your body, wiping away any soot and dirt that you’d brought home from the work site.

After you had finished cleaning yourself off as best as you possibly could under the circumstances, you searched through the drawers and grabbed one of Joel’s cleaner t-shirts, tugging it over your head. Even with the size of your swollen midsection, his shirt still fit you loosely enough, the hem of it falling to the top of your thighs. You’d finished just in time—another contraction starting coming on and you dropped down onto the bed, gripping the edge of the mattress as you hunched over in a world of hurt. “Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

As it subsided, the sound of the front door opening caused your head to snap up and your heart to skip a beat. Had you been too loud? Or perhaps a neighbor had walked by and heard you?

“Baby?” Joel’s deep voice filled the small apartment. When he appeared around the wall and saw you, a look of utter relief crossed his face and he rushed over to you, Tess following behind him. He crouched down in front of you, both of his hands flying up to the sides of your face. “M’sorry darlin’, I got here as fast I could—”

Though you could have nearly cried from happiness that he was right there in front of you, you found yourself snapping at him, “What took you so fucking long? It’s been fucking hours!”

Tess jumped to Joel’s defense. “I’m sorry, it’s on me! It’s my fault. It took me forever just to fucking find his ass and then we had to find a way to sneak him away from the work site without anyone noticing,” she explained, holding her hands up. “Not to mention, he was on the other end of the fucking QZ. We got here as fast as we could—how far apart are they coming?”

You winced. The truth was, you’d been so busy trying to get through the contractions that you hadn’t been timing them at all. “About that.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? I gave you one fucking job—”

“Look, they’re still decently far apart by a few minutes.” You placed a hand on your stomach, suddenly admitting, “But I do feel the urge to push already.”

Joel’s hands slowly dropped from your face and he glanced over his shoulder and up at Tess, looking confused. “Think it’s time?”

She shook her head. “I know it’s going to feel like you need to push as you get closer, but don’t,” she warned you, firmly. “Not yet. They need to come closer together, about a minute to thirty seconds apart. If you start to push too early, you could hurt the baby. Or tear yourself apart.” Tess took off her jacket, tossing it on a nearby chair. “Joel, keep her as comfortable as you can. I’m going to start gathering some supplies. She may not be ready to push now, but I’m thinking within the hour, it’ll be time.”

“Within the hour?” You nearly squeaked.

Joel turned back to you and cupped your face again. The familiarity of his rough, calloused hands on your skin brought some calmness, not enough to completely take your fears away, but just enough that you were able to stay somewhat level headed, even through every single emotion that you were feeling. “Baby, I know you're scared,” he said, his thumb grazing against your cheek. “But I promise you, everythin’ is gonna be just fine, alright? Look at me, right here, look at me,” he urged as he held your face firmly in his hands, forcing you to meet his gaze. “You’re gonna be fine. I won’t let anythin’ happen to you.”

“Joel, it’s childbirth,” You reminded him, smiling wearily. “Don’t make a promise you don’t know if you can actually keep.”

Though he knew deep down inside that you had a point, he repeated himself. “I won’t let anythin’ happen to you. Okay?”

You offered him a small, meek nod. “Okay.”

Joel lifted himself, pressing his lips gently to yours. He pulled away, murmuring against your lips, “That’s my girl.”

The hour that followed had been nothing short of horrific—the pain had become almost unbearable by this point. There wasn’t a single inch of your entire body that wasn’t drenched, soaked in perspiration. Your hair was an absolute mess, plastered to your forehead and to the sides of your face. Tess sat on her bed, waiting on standby for when it was time to deliver. Meanwhile, Joel, could only hold your hand in his and watch helplessly as you tried not to cry out too loudly.

“Joel,” You nearly pleaded his name, as if pleading for him to take his gun and put you out of your misery.

“I know, baby, I know,” he murmured soothingly, squeezing your hand in both of his. “I know it hurts.”

“What if I can’t do this?”

“Sorry, sweet darlin’ but you don’t have much of a choice,” he reminded you. He looked and sounded so fucking tired, so fucking exhausted—and he was. He was exhausted from having to sit there and witness you hurt while there wasn’t a goddamn thing he could do about it.

Once the contractions started coming in at less than a minute apart, Tess checked you. “I can feel the head. It’s time to start pushing,” she announced. Rolling up the sleeves of her shirt up to her elbows, she started giving you instructions. “You’re going to bear all the way down into your bottom as hard as you can. We’ll do ten second counts with short, quick rests in between each push until he comes out. Alright?”

You just about panicked. “Joel—”

“M’right here,” he quickly assured you. “Not goin’ anywhere.”

During the process, Joel had decided to sit behind you, his long legs on either side of you as he held you up at just a couple degrees shy of a ninety degree angle. Tess kneeled on the mattress between your legs, holding your knees apart as she counted through each push out loud for you.

You sank your front teeth hard into your bottom lip, the coppery taste of blood filling your mouth as you tried your hardest from screaming out.

“One, two, three, four—” Tess counted the numbers aloud until she reached the number ten. She watched you as you released a breath, and tapped your knee gently. “Come on, we’re almost there. He’s right there, you’re so fucking close. The harder you push, the quicker this will all be over. So give me one more big, strong push, alright?”

Joel squeezed your shoulders, his lips at your ear as he whispered to you over and over again, “C’mon baby, we’re almost there. It’s almost over.”

You were completely spent, exhausted both physically and mentally beyond what mere words could even explain. Close or not, you simply didn’t have it in you to keep going.

“I’m sorry, I can’t,” You moaned, shaking your head as you slumped back against his chest, your head falling into his shoulder. Your body felt like it was just moments away from giving out on you. “I can’t do it, Joel. I just can’t fucking do this—”

“You can and you fucking will,” Tess all but snapped at you, forcing your knees further apart. “Come on, all I need is one more push. Just one fucking more.”

“But—”

“Baby, please,” Joel begged into your neck. “You have to do this.”

You whimpered. They were right—you didn’t have a choice.

“Okay. One more.” You gave a small, weak nod of your head.

Joel helped you sit back up into the previous position, using his body to help support yours. He kissed the back of your head, his hands on your shoulders again. “Good girl,” he praised, bracing himself to help you through the tail end of the delivery.

“Alright, let’s do this.” Tess positioned herself, her hands ready to receive the baby once he was born. “On the count of three. One, two, three—and push. Come on, that’s it. Come on.” Squeezing your eyes shut, you followed her encouraging words, bearing down as hard as you could muster while Joel counted you through that last strenuous push. “Baby’s out!” Tess nearly cried, and you quickly opened your eyes to see her holding the baby in her arms. 

“Is he okay?” You panted, your chest heaving as you fought to catch your breath. Only mere seconds had passed, but already you found yourself in a state of anxiety over the fact that the baby hadn’t made a single sound yet. “He hasn’t cried—why hasn’t he cried?”

“She,” Tess corrected you, her eyes fixed on the newborn as she worked to clean her off with a damp washcloth. She rubbed her chest in quick, firm circles in an attempt to get her to take her first breath.

Your heart skipped a beat—you’d had a girl?

Behind you, Joel inhaled sharply, his body stiffening.

You watched in concern, your lips parted slightly at the sight before you. Not having the proper tools to clear the child’s airway, Tess tried everything and anything that she could think of to help the baby breathe. As the seconds turned into a minute, and then into two, your heart had all but climbed its way up your throat—never had you heard a silence so deafening.

“Tess,” Joel said her name, his tone dangerously low.

“Fuck Joel, I’m trying here!” Tess snapped at him. She let out a small, frustrated sigh and then turned the baby over onto her forearm. She started patting the infant’s back with her opposite hand. “Come on, sweetheart. Come on, you’re alright. Please breathe. Please—”

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the baby sputtered and let out a wet cough before a small, quick cry filled the entire apartment. 

“Fuck,” You breathed out in complete and utter relief. You sagged back against Joel, who’d also released the breath he’d been holding.

“Shh,” Tess soothed her, flipping the baby back over and bouncing her in her arms in an attempt to quiet her.  

Joel carefully climbed out from behind you, helping you to lean back, up against the wall. “You alright?”

“Better now that I know she’s okay.”

“She’s small, definitely at least a couple of weeks premature, but she looks healthy,” Tess observed. She single handedly clamped the cord, cutting it with a pair of sharp shears before she finished cleaning her off. She reached for the flannel throw blanket next to her, however upon picking it up, she had realized it wasn’t a blanket at all. It was Joel’s flannel jacket, the very same one that you’d worn for most of your pregnancy. But it had been washed the day before and it would do for the time being. Tess wrapped the baby in the jacket before easing her into your arms. Knowing that you’d never held a baby before, Tess reached out and maneuvered your arms, making sure that you were holding her properly, supporting her head and neck. “That’s it. There you go.”

Your heart swelled to twice its normal size inside of your chest and an inexplicable warmth radiated throughout every fiber of your being the moment you laid your eyes on her sweet, tiny little face. “Hi, there,” You cooed gently to her. “Welcome to the shitshow.”

Tess chuckled, crossing her arms over her chest. “Son of a bitch. We fucking did it.”

“What the hell do you mean we?” You rolled your eyes in a joking manner. The truth of the matter was that you would forever be in her debt for all that she had done to help you, not just through childbirth—through everything. 

You then glanced over at Joel, who stood silently behind her, hands planted on his hips.

He said nothing, but his dark brown eyes were glued to the newborn.

Tess cleared her throat lightly, breaking the momentary silence that had suddenly fallen over the three of you. “I’ll give you a minute to take a breather while I go clean myself up. I’ll be back to show you how to feed her.”

She excused herself, heading off towards the kitchen.

Joel shuffled awkwardly from foot to foot. “You—uh, you sure you’re alright?”

“Mhm,” You replied with a nod, unable to contain the small smile that crossed your lips as you drank in the sight of the beautiful baby girl in your arms. She had been born with a head full of dark hair—instantly, she reminded you of Joel. “She’s so little.”

Joel said nothing.

Looking up, you noticed the way his eyes took her in—the same way yours did. 

Part of you almost wanted to ask him if he wanted to hold her.

But you knew better.

“We’ll radio Bill and Frank tomorrow in the morning to let them know she’s here ,” Tess said, coming back into the room. She used a damp cloth to wipe away the blood and other fluids from her forearms. “As soon as you’re able to move, you’ll have to get her over to them.”

Your face fell slightly. “Wait, how soon are we talking?”

“Thinking maybe in a couple days—soon as you can walk.”

Your heart sank deeply into your chest.

Just a couple of days? 

That’s all you would get with her?

Noticing the crestfallen expression on your face, Joel nodded. “Tess is right,” he agreed. “We can’t hide a cryin’ baby in this apartment for too long without someone catchin’ on. The sooner we get her over to Bill and Frank’s, the better.”

You somehow managed to swallow the lump of emotion that had risen in your throat as you looked back down at her tiny face—your daughter’s tiny face.

“Think of a name for her yet?” Tess asked you, tossing her dirty cloth aside.

Joel quickly stepped in and answered for you. “Best you don’t.”

“What?” You stared at him in disbelief. Although neither of you had discussed it, you’d thought that at the very least Joel would allow you to name your child—his child.

“The less attached you are to her, the better.” His tone was short, almost curt. “Less harder it’ll be.”

Even Tess was taken by surprise. “Joel, come on. Are you fucking seri—?”

He held up a hand to stop her. Whirling around on the hell of his boot, Joel said over his shoulder as he left the room, “I’ll be outside. Need some air.”

Your lips pressed together in a thin, tight line. “I guess he’s right.”

The mattress squeaked, shifting slightly as Tess took a seat right next to you on the bed. “You know it’s going to hurt him too,” she told you, quietly. “He’ll never admit it. But when the time comes, it’ll hurt him too.”

“I know,” You whispered, grazing the baby’s cheek lightly with the tip of your index finger.

“Joel loves you, you know.”

Tess’s words caught you by surprise. “Tess—don’t. You don’t need to do this.”

She laughed in spite of herself. “You know, I never thought that man could be capable of loving anyone else ever again, not in this life. Hell, I tried for fucking years just to get him to feel a fraction of what I felt for him and nothing.” Her voice became thick with the emotions that she’d undoubtedly been suppressing for the last few years. “I don’t know what is about you, what drew him to you. But he does love you. More than fucking anything.”

“He’ll probably never admit that either.”

Tess smiled sadly. “I know.”

The five hour trip on foot from the Boston QZ to Lincoln was one that you had gotten used to over the last couple of years, but this trip had been something of a struggle for you, to say the very least.

Between being only a couple of days postpartum, having to make frequent stops to feed the baby, and having her strapped tightly to your chest in a makeshift baby carrier—which in reality was actually just a bedsheet that wrapped around your upper body—you felt quite worn out by the time you and Joel finally made it to Bill and Frank’s.

“Come in, come in,” Frank placed a hand gently on your back as he ushered you inside of the house. “How are you doing? Are you okay?” He tossed a little glare over his shoulder at Joel. “Shame on you for making her walk three days after giving birth! Surely you could have waited at least a few more days before making the trip?”

Joel let out a small, impatient huff and rolled his eyes in response.

“We didn’t wanna risk being caught with her,” You quickly explained as he led you both into the living room. “Our walls are paper thin and she cries real loud. We didn’t wanna risk having the neighbors reporting us to FEDRA.”

“She’s a crier?” Bill, who kept his distance, scoffed. “Great.”

“Oh, stop it, Bill. I’m sure she’ll be a very good baby,” Frank waved his hand dismissively at him. 

“Can you guys help me unwrap?” You asked, lightly tugging at the sheet. “This thing is so uncomfortable.”

Both Joel and Frank helped untie and remove it from around your body.

“Oh my word.” Frank’s hand flew to his mouth and tears instantly welled in his eyes as soon as saw her. “I never thought I’d see—” He trailed off, but you knew what he meant. He never thought he’d see another child ever again, much less a newborn baby. Frank knew better than to overstep or to push you too quickly, and despite his immediate urge to ask you if he could hold her already, he simply settled for lightly touching his fingertips to her tufts of soft, dark hair. “Oh, she’s so beautiful! Isn’t she beautiful, Bill?”

“Looks like an ordinary baby to me,” he grumbled, though as he eyed the child, there was a strange little glint in his eye. Bill, like Frank, also never thought that he’d ever see something like her again.

Frank sniffed, dabbing his tears away with the back of his hand. “Oh! I have some onesies from the boutique, let me grab one for you,” he stated, realizing that the baby was naked, with the exception of the improvised diaper you had her in. “She’s kind of small, even for a newborn. Do you think she came early?” He asked over his shoulder as he walked over to the other side of the room towards a pile of cardboard boxes. “I know it’s hard to tell what week you reached gestation.”

“We think so,” You said, carefully taking a seat on the couch. “She’s small, but she’s healthy. She eats well, she mostly sleeps through the night unless she wakes up hungry or needing to be changed.”

“Here.” Frank walked back over to you and handed you a cream colored onesie printed with yellow sunflowers. He also handed you a matching cloth diaper. “They’re preemie size, but I have a box of newborn sizes too if they’re too snug on her. You let me know what you think is best, alright?”

It didn’t take you very long to realize that Frank was allowing you just a taste of what it was like to properly and normally care for your baby, just like any mother would in a pre-outbreak world. 

Part of you wished that he wouldn’t bother, but you still appreciated his kindness nonetheless.

Frank laid a soft, pink blanket on the couch for you to lay her on.

As you changed her, you felt Joel watching almost intently.

Since she’d been born, he still hadn’t held her. You didn’t take offense to it, nor did it hurt your feelings that he refused to touch her, because you knew how he was feeling—what he was feeling. You would often catch him stealing long, lingering glances at her whenever he’d think you weren’t paying attention. Deep down in your heart, you knew he ached to interact with her, that he wanted nothing more than to take her into his arms and give into his paternal instincts. But he was simply trying to make this process as painless for himself as possible. Joel didn’t want to risk developing any kind of attachment to her. 

“Does she have a name?” Frank asked, holding his hands behind his back as he watched you button up the onesie. At this point, he was itching to hold her for the first time, but he wanted to respect what little time you had left to interact with her.

Sure, you would be able to see her every now and again, but Joel was adamant of keeping visits to a minimum.

“She doesn’t,” You replied in a soft voice. “We didn’t name her.”

Joel, who had taken a seat in the rocking chair next to the couch, raked a hand through his hair as Frank shot him glare, as if he knew whose idea it had been to not give her a name. “S’only right for you two to choose a name. We ain’t got no business givin’ her a name.”

“He’s right,” You said, before Frank could protest. “It’s best we leave that to you and Bill.”

Frank touched your shoulder. The sympathy in his eyes nearly made you burst into tears on the spot. Wanting to allow for a brief change of subject, he offered, “How about we all have a bite to eat? Hmm? Surely you must be starving after that long walk.”

You forced a small smile. Food was the last thing on your mind. “That would be nice,” you fibbed. 

For the rest of the afternoon, you refused to put the baby down.

Your arms ached from holding her for so long—but you couldn’t care less. It was one ache that you would happily deal with for the rest of your natural born life if it meant never having to let her go.

Frank had been completely understanding of your desire to keep her with you for as long as you possibly could. Being the incredibly sweet, kind soul that he was, he showed you nothing but patience and didn’t question you, nor did he push you or grill you on whether or not you had changed your mind about leaving her in their care. Bill, being Bill, had muttered a few, passive aggressive incoherencies towards you under his breath over lunch—something about how for someone who claimed they wouldn’t have a problem giving up their baby, you sure as hell seemed to have a hard time letting her out of your grasp.

However, once the late afternoon finally rolled around, you knew that the time for you to say goodbye was on the horizon. As much as you fucking wished you could, there was no changing your mind, not if you wanted your daughter to live safely, happily.

“Bill? Frank? Do you think we can have a minute with her, just the two of us?” You asked them. You had all moved back into the living room after lunch. Knowing time was running out, you hoped that you and Joel could have one last moment alone with her before it was time to leave.

“Of course.” Frank nodded and tugged on Bill’s arm. “We’ll be out in the front yard—the plants need some watering.”

You shot him a tiny, grateful smile. As they disappeared, you leaned back into the couch and made yourself comfortable with the baby.

Joel, who sat over in the rocking chair as he had earlier, pursed his lips. “Don’t make this harder than it needs to be,” he said, shaking his head at you. “We really should just hand her over and go home.”

“It’s going to be hard no matter what, Joel. May as well enjoy her for a while longer.” You glanced down at her just as she started fussing herself awake. She looked up at you with her dark eyes. “Hello, sweet girl,” You greeted her in a soothing voice as she cooed. 

Joel watched with a heaviness in his heart as you kissed the infant’s cheek delicately. How he wished you would just fucking listen to him.

“You’re going to be safe here,” You told her, lifting your hand to her hair; the ends were beginning to curl slightly. “I know you might grow up and have questions one day, and who knows, maybe when you’re all grown up, you’ll know the truth about everything and you’ll understand why we did what we did.” You paused. “This is the right thing to do, sweet girl. It's the best thing for you. Frank is going to make a great dad, and Bill—well, Bill is Bill. But I know you’ll have him wrapped around your little finger in no time. I promise there’s a softie underneath that grumpy exterior, just have to bring it out of him, is all.” Despite it all, you couldn’t help but laugh a little. 

Joel craned his neck ever so slightly to get a better look at her. “She’s so alert,” he observed. “Y’know, for bein’ a couple days old and all.”

You glanced up at him. Somehow, you mustered up the courage to ask, “Joel? Do you want to hold her?”

Joel hesitated. But you were shocked he didn’t immediately decline.

That meant that he did.

You carefully stood up from the couch and slowly walked over to him. Giving her another kiss on the cheek, you held her out towards him.

Joel looked at her reluctantly, but then gave in and took her into his arms. He leaned his weight back into the chair and started rocking, knowing the movement would be soothing for the baby. “She’s got your nose,” he murmured, watching as the motion started luring her into another slumber.

“That head of hair is all you, though,” You told him with a tiny, sad smile. “I’m going to go get a glass of water from the kitchen. I’ll be right back.”

Moments later, when you’d returned, you stopped in your tracks out in the hallway when you heard Joel speaking. Furrowing your brows, you leaned your back against the wall and listened in to what he was saying.

“Hi babygirl,” he started, his voice low but gentle. “Everythin’ your mama just told you, well, she’s right. We’re doin’ this to keep you safe. We wanna give you a chance at a decent life. She doesn’t wanna give you up. Neither do I,” he confessed. “But we can’t—I can’t keep you safe. I can barely keep your mama safe most of the time, y’know.”

You hung your head, willing yourself to hold back the tears.

“I didn’t want you, at least not at first,” Joel continued to say, an ever so slight tremble to his voice. “Thought you were the biggest mistake we ever could’ve made. But now that you’re here and I’m holdin’ you in my arms, I realize I was wrong. I’m glad you’re here, babygirl. This world is ugly, but you remind me that there’s still beauty in it. Not a whole lot, but just enough to shine a little light in the darkness.”

Joel paused and as you peeked around into the living room, you saw him press his lips carefully to her cheek, right where you’d kissed her too. “You won’t be ours after today, but that doesn’t really matter. At the end of the day, you’re always gonna hold a place in my heart. Right next to your big sister. Alright?”

A tear slipped down your cheek, and you quickly wiped it away with the back of your free hand. As soon as you were certain that he’d said all he had needed to say, you walked into the living room and offered him a sip of your water, behaving as if you hadn’t just heard him pour his heart out to his baby daughter. Joel moved over onto the couch with you and for the next couple of hours, the two of you took turns holding her. By the time early evening arrived, you realized that you and Joel were really pushing it. And knowing Bill, you were absolutely overstaying your welcome.

“So, we just wanted to check in with you two,” Frank said tentatively, nervously wringing his hands together as walked into the room with a very unhappy Bill trailing behind him. “It’ll be getting dark soon.”

You and Joel stood from the couch; he handed the baby over to you.

Your heart lodged in your throat, you walked over to Frank and eased her into his arms. “Here you are.”

Taking a step backwards, you watched as he looked down at her, his face beaming.

“Fatherhood looks good on you,” You couldn’t help but tell him. And you meant it.

Frank was going to make the most incredible, loving father. 

“Does it?” Although he was smiling, he sounded nervous.

“You’re going to be a natural,” You touched his arm lightly. “We know she’s going to be in the best possible care.” Dropping your hand back down to your side, you glanced over at Joel, who stood there silently, his jaw clenched. “We’d better be going.”

“You know you’re more than welcome to come and see her whenever you’d like,” Frank offered. “We really wouldn’t mind that.”

“Don’t take that too literally,” Bill gruffed behind him. “The less visits, the better.”

You nodded, your voice cracking slightly as you said, “We know.”

“Let’s get a move on.” Joel nudged you lightly with his elbow. Did you just hear his voice break a little too?

After one final goodbye, about five minutes later, you and Joel found yourselves on the other side of the fence.

Joel noticed the expression on your face. He could see you crumbling right in front of his very own eyes like a pastry. He didn’t know what to say or do to make it better—hell, he knew nothing was going to make it better. He wanted so badly to reach out and put his arms around you, but he was afraid that one touch would cause you to come undone. “C’mon, we need to get movin’ before it gets too late or we’ll freeze our asses off,” he reminded you quietly. He started leading the way, but turned around when he realized you weren’t following behind him. “Baby—”

And just like that, the sob you’d been fighting finally escaped you.

“I’m sorry, Joel,” You quickly shook your head, trying desperately to stop the tears, but it was too late.

“Don’t be sorry, it’s alright—”

Before Joel could reach out for you, you sank down to your knees on the gravel. You placed your hands over your mouth, trying to muffle the sound of your cries. You knew it would be hard, but nothing could have prepared you for the god awful feeling of leaving Bill and Frank’s empty handed, without your baby daughter in your arms.

Joel sighed softly and crouched down beside you, pulling you into his arms. “Shh, baby. I know,” he tried soothing you, one hand around your shoulders and the other gingerly stroking your hair. “I know.”

Though nightfall was fast approaching, he didn’t push you. He simply held you until you eventually ran out of tears and little hiccups were all that was left. “I’m so sorry.”

“Stop fuckin’ sayin’ you’re sorry,” Joel said, squeezing your body against his to keep you warm against the chilly, evening breeze. “You have nothin’ to be sorry for, alright?”

“It hurts. I know we did the right thing, but it hurts so fucking bad.”

Joel pulled away and looked down at you. The sadness was evident in his gaze. “We did do the right thing. She’s going to be safer here than she could ever be with us in the QZ,” he reminded you, as if you didn’t already know that. “At least here, she’ll be well fed. She’ll have running water. She’ll get to enjoy fresh, clean air. She’ll get to run around the front yard and play in the grass. She won’t have to walk home from fuckin’ FEDRA school past a fire pit full of burnin’ bodies every goddamn day.”

“Maybe it’s just me being selfish, but that doesn’t make it hurt any fucking less, Joel,” You confessed, the guilt causing a fresh batch of tears to brim your eyes. “I know we’ll still get the chance to see her every now and again, but it’s not enough. It won’t ever be enough for me.”

He leaned down, leaning his forehead against yours. “I know. Won’t ever be enough for me either.”

You closed your eyes, another tear finding its way down your cheek. “How the fuck are you supposed to go on when you feel like a part of your heart is missing?”

“You just do,” Joel whispered. “You just move on. Try to, anyway.” He rose to his feet and pulled you up with him. “When I lost Sarah, I had nothing. Nobody. Tommy wasn’t someone I could count on, he was too busy thinkin’ he could save the fuckin’ world.” He chuckled bitterly. “So I carried that grief with me for years, all on my own. Like the weight of a thousand bricks strapped to my fuckin’ back.”

“Joel…” You opened your eyes, your gazes meeting together.

He lightly brushed his lips against forehead. “You ain’t alone, darlin’. You have me and I ain’t gonna let you carry this pain alone. You understand me? Never.”

“I know that,” You choked out. 

Joel pulled you against him once again, his arms wrapping themselves around you. 

“I love you.”

It was just above a whisper, barely audible but you’d heard him.

Clutching fistfuls of his jacket, you buried your face into his chest, uttering, “I love you too.”

[heartpascal]

when the sun goes down

▹— joel miller x platonic!f!reader

▹— summary: joel doesn’t talk about you, until he does

▹— a/n: this one might be kinda ,, weird?? idk if i like how ive written it!! its kinda different to my usual fics !!! + the ending is kinda funky idk

▹— warnings: fem!reader (she/her used), reader is dead , mention of reader getting infected , grief, loss, guilt, lots of angst, small mention of suicidal ideation, referenced murder, mother tess, father joel, uncle tommy, ellie asking inappropriate questions tbh, think that’s everything but let me know!

▹— taglist: @rhymingtree @sleepygraves @wnstice (everything) @auggiesolovey @just-kaylaa @evyiione @lemonlaides @fariylixie0915 @faceache111 @randomhoex @canpillowscry @pedropascalsrealgf @star-wars-lover @coolchick333 @soobsdior @rvjaa @sunflowersdrop @definitely-not-a-seagull-i-swear (pedro)

masterlist

∘₊✧───── ───── ───── ─────✧₊∘

When Joel had been a stranger, Ellie would have never even had the thought to guess that you or Sarah had existed. The man seemed… too stoic, too unbothered, or perhaps, too bothered. She was never really sure what Joel was, back then.

But over the weeks, then the months, and then the years of knowing Joel Miller, it had become increasingly obvious that there was a distinctive daughter-shaped gap within him. It had left a cavernous space in the man, which Ellie had done her very best to fill, even if she would never have admitted it to anyone.

It was clear in the way Joel had tied up her hair when she was sick, in the way he knew exactly what she needed to hear, even when she didn’t know herself. It was obvious in the way he responded to her argumentative nature, her spitting words, his protective behaviour.

Ellie hadn’t even really thought about it, until the day she and Joel arrived at Jackson, until Maria revealed what the two names on that chalkboard meant. After that, it all started to make sense, and she had finally believed that she understood Joel Miller in some deeper way, in a way that actually mattered. She didn’t think about what she was doing back when she had argued with Joel, when she had spluttered out, “I’m not her, you know.”

Your name hadn’t even been mentioned, back then, and Ellie hadn’t known at the time that when she had said her, Joel didn’t know exactly who she was talking about.

Either way, he made it clear that Ellie shouldn’t be mentioning anybody Joel had lost. Certainly not you or Sarah, or even Tess.

After the whole… hospital fiasco, Ellie wasn’t sure she had ever understood Joel, after all. She’d been numb, to some extent, when she and Joel had finally made it back to Jackson, back to Tommy and Maria’s warm house, with their surprisingly peaceful baby. The first time she had visited their house, she hadn’t even noticed your name up on the chalkboard, a new addition, one without any dates below it, but written with as much care as the others.

It was the second, or the third time, maybe, that Ellie noticed the brand new name up on the chalkboard in Maria’s living room. She had been even more hesitant to talk about it than she had been to talk about Sarah and Kevin, so Ellie had figured that the loss was fresh. She hadn’t asked again, for a very long time.

Tommy, unsurprisingly, had been the one to tell her. A long day after a nightly patrol had the man exhausted, and he was two glasses of booze in when he had seen Ellie squinting up at the chalkboard as she was around for dinner.

“He ever tell you about her?” Tommy asked, fresh glass of booze gripped in his fist as he settled down on the sofa, looking up at the board with something numb in his eyes.

Ellie had said your name like a question, eyes scanning between the board and Tommy with furrowed brows. At Tommy’s nod, Ellie had shook her head, turning to Tommy like a child ready for story time before bed.

Tommy took another sip of his drink, sucking his teeth before he finally spoke. “He never told me what happened to her,” He said, eyes fixed on the board as if information might appear. “But I figure he must blame himself, whatever happened. She was fine when I left, but I’m guessing gone by the time you were around.” Tommy continued, looking to Ellie, who nodded. “Don’t know when exactly it happened. He’s real tight lip about it, even more so than he is about Tess, but I don’t blame him. She was his second chance.”

“Second chance?” Ellie repeated, eyebrows raised.

Tommy nodded in confirmation. “Found her not long after the Outbreak. She took to Joel straight away, poor kid. After Sarah, he was… different, but Joel, he looked after that girl like nobody else would’a.”

Some of the things Joel had done or said made a lot more sense to Ellie, in light of this information. You had been Joel’s second chance at protecting his daughter, his redemption, and he had failed. It was no surprise, in that case, that he had been as protective as he had. Or that he had tried to dump Ellie with Tommy, back when they first got to Jackson.

Joel believed he was a failure.

It was quite the realisation for Ellie.

She noticed more, after that. Like the way Joel would stop in the street when he saw people who must have held a certain resemblance to you or to Sarah. Or the way he would stay up late into the night, staring blankly at the darkening world around him as he sat on the porch. Ellie noticed just how much effort Joel put into looking after her, as if afraid that something could happen to her, or she could just disappear. She also noticed the way his eyes lingered on Tommy’s chalkboard, each time they visited.

Ellie thought that maybe, some day, Joel would wind up talking about you on his own. But days passed, and then weeks, and then they’d been staying in Jackson for close to two years, and nothing.

If it hadn’t had been for Joel sticking his nose into Ellie’s business, she probably would’ve never even revealed to him that she knew of your existence. Or at least, your connection to him. But Joel Miller was nothing if not stubborn, and when Ellie had been down for more than two days in a row, he stopped minding his business.

Joel was all comforting words in the face of a preventable loss on a patrol, and Ellie was sick of it.

“It ain’t your fault, kiddo. Nobody blames you for what happened, and you oughta talk about it to somebody.” Joel had said, voice warm and concerned like any father might be, and Ellie couldn’t help but snap after the day she’d had.

“It’s always one thing for you and then another for me, Joel!” She said, baring her teeth at the man, who only looked as confused as ever. “I’m sick of it. Stop telling me things that you know aren’t true, just because you feel guilty!”

His arms had been crossed defensively over his chest at her words, his eyebrows furrowing, the crease between them more prominent than ever. “And what’s that supposed to mean?” He asked, voice gruff and warning, as opposed to the previous tone he had been taking with her. He was practically daring her to go on with what she was insinuating.

“That you want to believe your kids dying wasn’t on you! And that’s great, Joel, but this was on me. It was my fault.” Ellie had spat out, arms wide out by her side, their stances opposing one another. She was accepting her guilt, acknowledging it, realising it was true, where Joel had only ever taken the blame, lugging the guilt along with him for years as if hoping it could disappear.

He had been sure, for a moment, that Ellie had taken to physical blows, but he realised in the silence which had followed her words that the pain was all him. She was right, which to Joel, was the real kicker. He had a knack for projecting onto people, for being defensive over guilt as if it reflected his own. As if, somehow, Ellie being guilty meant that Joel certainly was, too.

Maybe Ellie was right, but even if she was, Joel was in no mindset to admit it. How could he? He couldn’t even bring himself to talk about you, too scared that Ellie would see him for what he truly was; a failure. How would Ellie have responded to that? It was the exact reason he hadn’t told her the truth about the hospital, about what he had done, about the lengths he would go to. She might have seen him violent before, but never to that extent. Never against people she cared for.

If he told Ellie the truth, he would have to admit that he had failed a third child. Perhaps not quite in the same way as he had failed you and Sarah, but in some capacity, he would lose her, too.

Joel had been a selfish man for a very long time, by then. It was no surprise that he opted for the path that would allow him to keep the only child he had left. Who could blame him? Even Tommy, in some strange way, had understood his actions. Especially after his baby had been born, Tommy couldn’t blame Joel for doing what was necessary.

A parent’s love for their child was unrelenting. And Joel took that sentiment very seriously.

But Ellie couldn’t understand. She wouldn’t.

So, in that moment, he had levelled her with a look that put all parental glares to shame. “Go to your room.” Joel had instructed, voice flat, cold. Ellie, in her shock, had done as she was told, which was unusual.

This time, however, when Joel told Tommy of what had occurred, his brother hadn’t agreed with his actions.

When Tommy explained that Ellie didn’t know about you, or about Sarah, and certainly didn’t understand the relationship the two of you had had with Joel, he could see how she could’ve said something so… distasteful. After all, Joel had never told Ellie exactly what had happened to Sarah, let alone to you. Hell, he didn’t speak about you at all. He didn’t want Ellie to believe that he would fail her next.

But the talk was overdue, and the silence in the house had been suffocating Joel, and he noticed how uncomfortable Ellie had been, too. So he had no choice but to steel himself, to grip a mug of coffee, give up on slowing his heart rate.

When Ellie walked through the door, having been out with her friends all day, she stopped short at seeing Joel sat on the couch, looking more stressed than she had seen him in a long, long time. “Sit down.” Joel said, his words catching and tumbling out, as he gestured towards the armchair opposite the couch.

Surprisingly, she sat. “Is everything… okay?” She asked, hesitantly.

“I think it’s time I have a talk with you,” Joel admitted, his fingers squeezing the mug tightly. “You were right.”

“As always.” Ellie responded instantly, an instinctive response that generated a scoff of laughter from Joel, soothing his stressed brow the slightest amount. She cringed, but relaxed at his expression. “About what, exactly?”

“About it being one thing for me, and another for you. It’s not fair of me to ask you to talk about things, if I don’t talk right back to you.” Joel said, slowly, trying to sort through his thoughts before he fumbled another important father-daughter talk, as he had done many times before. “I’m goin’ to tell you about my girls.”

“Joel, you really don’t—”

He interrupted, “No, I do. And I want to.”

Ellie nodded after a moment, settling down in her chair, finally placing her backpack by her feet. “Okay.”

“Okay,” Joel repeated. He took a deep breath, squeezing the coffee mug once more. He said your name, the syllables almost unfamiliar for how long it had been since he had said it. “She, well, I—… She got Infected, ‘bout six years ago.”

Ellie sucked in a harsh breath, sure she knew what had happened after that. It was a story she knew, all too well. Joel scratched at the hair on his cheek, grinding his teeth together. Remembering it all, remembering you was… hard. But it was also refreshing. As if showing the parts of you he’d held to his chest for so long was a weight, lifted from his shoulders.

He didn’t want to talk about that part, about the time he failed you, about what he’d done for you, but other things? He could talk about those.

Joel remembered the years he had spent with you, watching you grow, spending weeks of his life searching for gifts for every assumed birthday. He remembered teaching you how to read, gifting you books, helping you learn how to survive. He remembered the bond you’d shared with Tess, the time the two of them would spend doing your hair for you, with whatever supplies they could manage.

Telling Ellie about you was probably the most vulnerable Joel had ever been with her. It was certainly the most open he had been. It felt like, for the first time in a very long time, he had his heart stitched onto his sleeve.

There was so many memories of you, so many he’d kept to himself for years because Tess had never been able to talk about you, because he couldn’t bring himself to, either. He worried about memories he had forgotten, about how much of your face had faded into obscurity, about how inaccurately he recalled your laugh, your voice.

He thought that, perhaps, his very worst fear would be that if he let go of these memories, if he let other people look upon them alongside him, he’d forget. Joel wasn’t sure he could be open and hold on tight enough. What was too much? How much could he say before he forgot it all? How much would he remember if he didn’t analyse them in his mind? If he let Ellie listen to the moments he held most dear?

Joel didn’t want to forget.

But if he didn’t tell anybody, then who would remember you, after Joel was gone?

There was Tommy, he’d considered, but he knew Tommy’s memories were corrupted, taken over by Firefly nostalgia. No, despite Joel’s being older, his memories of you were certain to be more reliable.

“Here,” Joel said, eventually, his throat feeling tight with the effort of holding back tears. He pulled out a folded up print, one he had gotten out just that afternoon. It was crumpled and degraded with age, but the image remained true. “This is her.”

Ellie took the photo from his hands, the image being of you. It was taken when you were a kid, back when he’d first found you, back when FEDRA had been doing photographs, before all of the printing supplies ran out. It wasn’t a happy picture by any means, merely an image of you, stood in front of a white background with a scared look on your face, dirt smeared across your nose, but it was you. And to Joel, that was enough.

He much preferred to think of you that way, rather than your last moments. It was the only thing that allowed him to let go of that last picture of you, the one that haunted his mind.

When Tess had died, the only thing that gave Joel some peace was the belief that she would have reunited with you. That you wouldn’t be alone, anymore. Often times, in the events after your… well, after he lost you, Joel had considered following you down that path. He had prayed to the God he had once believed in, he had cried out for any divine interference to stop what had happened from being true. But no matter how much he prayed, how much he cried, you were gone.

You had given him a purpose, after Sarah. Joel doesn’t think he would’ve made it this far, if it hadn’t been for you. And it feels so… wrong. He thinks, now, that Ellie had provided him with a purpose, after you.

“So, you raised her in the apocalypse?” Ellie asked, looking down at the photograph fondly, running a thumb along the yellowing picture.

“That I did.”

“Lucky kid.” Ellie said, not nastily.

“I dunno, kiddo, I’ve not always been the best…” Joel trailed off, unsure if he could actually refer to himself as your dad, after everything. After what he had done. Or, rather, what he hadn’t. “We did our best, me and Tess. Hell, even Tommy pitched in.” Joel decided on, after a moment.

He remembered the times Tommy would agree to look after you, to babysit, if such a thing existed in the apocalypse. Usually, it was when he and Tess were going outside of the QZ for supplies, occasionally for the Fireflies, which was why Tommy was allowed time away from his war against FEDRA.

One such time, Joel recalled, he and Tess had returned back to the ransacked apartment they had been assigned to find you and Tommy curled up on the decaying couch, which had only one cushion, asleep. A blanket had been wrapped around your shoulders, and Tommy had your newest book held in his lap.

In that moment, Joel had so wished that he could’ve taken a picture. He remembered a picture of almost the same scene, of Tommy and Sarah on the couch in his old house, in front of a still-playing TV. He regretted not taking the photo albums when they left, back then. Even now, he often felt a pang of regret over how much of Sarah’s memory was reliant on his own.

“Tess raised her with you?” Ellie questioned, almost surprised, but she could remember the way Tess had acted almost… maternal. Not to mention her optimism, her hope, when there was a possibility of a cure. She wondered if that was because of what had happened to you.

Joel nodded, going on to tell the tale of Tess teaching you how to shoot, when you became old enough to handle a gun, when it became apparent that you would need to handle one. He remembered how you had missed all but one shot by your second lot of ammo. He remembered how frustrated you had been, how Tess had told you to suck it up and try again, with that good old no-nonsense attitude.

Ellie could almost imagine Tess saying that, could almost picture how annoying that must’ve been for you as a kid. It was almost amusing to try and picture Joel and Tess raising a child in the apocalypse, especially given how the two had been when she had met them, herself. She tried to imagine that Tess being a mother, but came up empty.

“Did she, y’know, call you dad, or whatever?” Ellie asked Joel, after a moment of hesitation. She wasn’t sure if that was inappropriate to ask, but she was curious. She couldn’t imagine calling Joel ‘dad’ to his face, even though he was the only father she had ever known.

∘₊✧───── ───── ───── ─────✧₊∘

“Dad!” You yelled, jumping up from the couch and away from Tommy, successfully waking him up in the process. You stumbled your way to the door as Joel swung it open, already dropping his bag to the floor. He was used to the greeting party, but you didn’t often shout him, in fact — did you ever? And since when did you call him ‘dad’? “You’re home! Did you get it?” You asked, jumping into his awaiting arms.

Joel squeezed you tightly, feeling a mixture of guilty and relieved that he was glad to be back, to come home to the child he had yet to fail. He thought about where you could have learnt that word, that name from, and could only come up with the new books Tommy had been helping you with while he and Tess had been away.

“‘Course I got it,” Joel responded, his voice gruff but full of warmth and humour. “Who d’you take me for?” He asked, grinning at your laughter and the way you squirmed from his hold to get to the backpack he’d dropped beside his feet.

“What’re we reading next, then?” Tommy asked, drawing Joel’s attention over towards the sofa, where his younger brother was smiling fondly. You hurried over, attention easily drawn away, and showed Tommy the book you’d taken from Joel’s bag, the one he’d managed to scrounge on his journey outside with Tess.

Joel was quickly drawn from his memories of the journey by you calling out to him once more. “Dad, are you coming to read with us, or not?” You asked, exasperated, and Joel grinned as he came over, his heart aching in his chest at the name, at the nostalgia of the activity.

“You bet.”

∘₊✧───── ───── ───── ─────✧₊∘

“She did.” Joel answered, after a moment of him being distracted, thinking of that very first time, thinking of the way he had fallen back into the title with such familiarity. He wondered if you would have been much like Sarah, had you been born before the apocalypse. Sometimes, he wondered that about Ellie. Often, he had to remind himself that you and Ellie weren’t his biological kids, and if it wasn’t for the apocalypse, he wouldn’t have had you.

He doesn’t like the way his chest aches at the thought of that. It might just be the only reason he’s grateful for the apocalypse that had ruined the world.

“She would’a liked you, y’know.” Joel said, almost absentmindedly, as if that comment didn’t make Ellie’s chest warm with appreciation, with pride. As if it didn’t make her wish that she could’ve met you, could’ve proved that comment correct.

“I think I would’ve liked her, too.” Ellie said, quietly, watching the way Joel reminisced, his eyes glazed over as he stared at the photo she still held. He smiled after a moment, and she was sure he was imagining what his life would’ve been like, had all of his kids met.

[corrodedcoffins-blog]

Bonding of Sorts

older!rockstar!eddie x popstar!reader

note: isla and walker are 15 in the timeline (probably ~mid 2024 vibes)

warning: teenage love, the start of a step-mom/step-daughter relationship <3

word count: 1.8k

isla_munson

liked by walker.scobell, y/nswife_, and others

tagged: @/sienna.taylor, @/Haley08_, @/_jesss, @/lil.lilian, and @/y/nl/n

isla_munson: "everybody knows that private school girls are bad, and bad girls always wear red nail polish" -loerlai gilmore

comments on this post are limited

y/nl/n: gorgeous girls!

lil.lilian: you did me dirty in that pic.

isla_munson: impossible! theres no doing you dirty, you look beautiful at every angle!

lil.lilian: liar but 😘😘

_jesss: not hals completely judging me in the forth pic

Haley08_: yeah, im always judging you

_jesss: 🖕

walker.scobell: cute fit, or lack thereof

isla.munson: omg! thats exactly what my dad said!

sienna.taylor: my little private school girl 🥰

-twitter-

Tina

@/updates_on_y/nl/n

Isla Munson posted these two photos of her and Y/n on her instagram today!

Lani @/percabeth.hearts replying to @/updates_on_y/nl/n I've never seen y/n happier!!

Abby (taylor's version) @/decodeisunderrated replying to @/updates_on_y/nl/n They're relationship is so cute! 🥰🥰

tess @/it.rhymes.with.jess replying to @/decodeisunderrated y/n and eddie's or y/n and isla's??

Abby (taylor's version) @/decodeisunderrated replying to @/it.rhymes.with.jess Both! 😁

Jamie @/jAmie_ replying to @/updates_on_y/nl/n she shouldn't be hanging out with her boyfriends daughter so much until they're more serious.

nia @/parisgellar_stan replying to @/jAmie_ oh? so you know them personally??

anna @/wolfstar.stan replying to @/updates_on_y/nl/n why no one mention how pretty isla is?!?!

betty @/betty_broski replying to @/updates_on_y/nl/n the thought of eddie taking the second picture warms my heart <33

Kevin @/pens_87 replying to @/updates_on_y/nl/n She looks the same age as heR boyfriends kid 😬

leah @/im.talking.nonsense replying to @/updates_on_y/nl/n them out shopping together 😭😭

-

“Ah.” Isla sighed, dropping her phone to her chest, and looking up at the ceiling. She was sitting on the couch in the New York apartment, Y/n had come over and was walking down the stairs when she saw Isla, “What was that love sick look about?” The woman asked, in a teasing voice. 

“Oh, um.. N- nothing.” “Who are they?” Y/n asked, completely disregarding isla’s defence. And coming to sit down next to the girl, forgetting she came down to get her and Eddie drinks. 

“His name’s Walker..” Isla grinned, not being able to stop it when talking about Walker, especially not with Y/n they were too close and comfortable with each other now. “..and we’ve been friends for a couple years, and he’s really cute, and I really like him.”

At Isla’s little rant, Y/n sprung into action, “Okay, I’m gonna go get what I came down here to get for Eddie then I’m coming straight back and we’ll talk about this.” “Okay.” 

Quickly gathering the ice tea Eddie and her wanted, pouring herself some, and getting Eddie a couple snacks to occupy him, not knowing how long this talk with Isla will last. Then saying a quick ‘one sec.’ to Isla, she ran upstairs, opening the door and finding Eddie where he was before. 

“Thank you, angel. Hey, where's yours?” “Downstairs.” Coming to sit on Eddie lap, facing the man, with a serious face on. “What’s wrong?” “Nothings wrong. Just… I wanted to talk to you before I talk to Isla, she wants my advice on a boy, and don’t go be overprotective dad on her. That’s exactly what she doesn’t want. But I need to know what you're okay with me saying, or if you're not okay with me saying anything, and I won’t.”

Smiling, and placing a quick, chaste kiss on his girl’s lips before replying, “Baby, thank you for asking me. I’m fine with you talking to her. So who is he?” “She said his name is Walker? That someone from school or-” “That kid?! Oh well, I don’t think that kid has a bad bone in his body. So yeah, you can.. Give her advice.. On a boy. Geez” “You’re getting old, baby.” Giving the girl a pinch on the ass, causing a jolt of the girl's body and a laugh coming out of her lips, before she continues, “Okay. I’m going. I love you” A quick kiss on her soft lips, and in getting an ‘I love you too’ Y/n walks out of the room, running down the stairs to see where Isla is still sitting. 

“Okay! Tell me everything.”

-

“I just don’t know how you tell a guy you like him.” Nodding in understanding, she mumbles, “It’s hard.” “...How old were you when you got your first boyfriend?” “Umm.. I was 15.” “Did you ask him out or did he ask you?” “He asked me.” The girls were now on the floor, Y/n painting Isla’s toenails, drinking ice tea, and eating popcorn, ‘10 Things I Hate About You’ on in the background. 

“Of course he did, cause you’re beautiful. No way he would ask me out.” “Hey. Isla, you are beautiful. And gorgeous, and amazing, and smart. Besides from what you’ve told me about Walker. I wouldn’t be surprised if he did really like you, like you like him, but was just too nervous to say anything.” “Shut up.” Isla says, her face permanently red at this point with how long they’ve been talking about her love life. 

“And guys like when girls take charge and ask them out.” “But we’ve been friends for years, and I don’t want to ruin that.” A completely logical argument, one Y/n had used on her friends years ago. Now switching to paint Isla’s other set of toes red, thinking about what she can say, to satisfy Isla’s need for a solution. “Hey! Why don’t you ask him to hang out here, just the two of you?” “And have Dad hovering over us the whole time? No way!” 

Adjusting her position on the floor, getting more comfortable before continuing, “We’ll what if it was me? A day where you’re Dad will be out and I can come over, you guys take the living room and I’ll stay out of your way upstairs?” “Omg! You can do that?! Please Y/n, please!” “I’ll have to ask Eddie, and if he says no then it’s no.” “Okay! Go! Go! Ask him now!” “I have to finish your toenails!” “I can do that. Go ask my Dad, then if he says yes you have to come help me draft a text to him!” “Okay!”

Hopefully running up the stairs for the last time today, Y/n walks into Eddie’s room, smiling, hoping that might sway Eddie slightly. “I thought you would never come back. What have you been doing down there?” “Painting nails, watching rom-coms, stuffing our faces, the usual for a girls night. But I have to ask you something.” Y/n says, sitting next to Eddie on his bed, pushing his laptop off his lap, in order to have his full attention for this. 

“Why do I feel like it’s going to be something I’ll want to say ‘no’ to?” “Well.. Maybe.. Maybe not.” “That was very reassuring.” “Listen, Isla wants to invite Walker here, to hang out, but she doesn’t want her Dad there-” “We’ll she can’t be alone with a boy.” “You said there wasn’t a bad bone in his body.” Y/n said obviously teasing. not wanting Eddie to think that’s what she was suggesting, “Well he’s still a teenage boy.” “Off topic. I was thinking that maybe, the next best thing for her would be if it was me here. They could stay in the living room, and I’ll just hang out upstairs or something, so I can hear what they’re doing but not hover.” A couple seconds of silence was too long in Y/n’s opinion for this subject. 

“Okay.” “Really?” “Yes, but they can’t go in her room, and you keep the door open of any room they’re in.” “Of course, baby! I want what's best for her." "I know." "Oh Eds, she’ll be so happy!” “I hate this.” “I know, but she’s growing up.” “I know.” “I’m gonna go tell Isla the good news!” Y/n says, running out of the room. Before quickly turning around going to the side of the bed Eddie was on, giving the man a lengthy kiss and whispering an ‘I love you’

“What did he say?!” The question is yelled at the woman, as soon as she’s back in sight. “You’ll be happy.” “Really?!” “Yes.” “Oh my god! Oh my god. We have to figure out what I’m gonna text him.”

-

“-and no going upstairs, and if you go in any room together the door stays open. Understand?” “Yes, Dad. Now go, I have to get ready.” Pushing her Dad towards the door, not wanting him here any longer. 

“Can I say goodbye first?” “If you must.” 

Walking over to Y/n, giving her a peck on her soft lips, then dipping his head down to whisper in the girl's ear, “Please keep an eye on them.” “Of course, Eds, it’s gonna be fine.” With that piece of mind and one last kiss and an ‘i love you’, Eddie walks back towards the door that was already held open for him by his wonderful and loving daughter. “Bye hun, love you.” “Love you too, Dad. Bye!”

Shutting the door and turning to the woman standing at the staircase, “You need to get me ready, and tell me what to wear.”

-

“I can’t believe you let me do this!”

Y/n sat at the kitchen island, watching as Isla paced in front of her. Isla was a wreck as soon as Y/n started getting her ready 30 minutes ago, just after Eddie left for the recording studio. “You are going to be fine.” Y/n said, to nonchalant for Isla’s taste, “You’re too calm!” “The guy I like isn’t coming over.” ‘Well-” Isla was cut off by the sound of the buzzer, “Hey Isla, it’s Walker” running over to the panel on the wall to buzz the boy in, “Hey! Come up… That was too excited, I’m gonna mess this up.” “Isla. In my experience, if you ask a guy to hang out alone they think it’s a date. In a man’s brain ‘hang out alone’ and ‘date’ are synonyms, so the fact he said yes to this, I’m sure he’s just as nervous as you.” “Okay.. Thanks, Y/n”

Interrupted by the doorbell, Isla gave Y/n a quick hug, running to the door. Of course, flattening her hair before opening the door. “Hey, Walker.” “Hey.” And being teenagers who like each other, Y/n swoops in to save the conversation. “Hi, I’m Y/n it’s nice to meet you, Walker.” “It’s nice to meet you too.” “Okay! The living room is free, I’ll be upstairs, and I’ll order pizza later. Walker, cheese or vegetarian good?” “Yeah.” “Okay! Have fun.”

Within only a couple minutes, Y/n could hear the conversation flowing and not wanting to eavesdrop, putting on a show to watch. 

-

About 40 minutes later, pausing the show she was watching to go to the bathroom, Y/n cannot hear anything from downstairs. And she was sure she knew what was happening, but she promised Eddie she would keep an eye on them and at the end of the day Y/n was a curious bitch. 

Creeping slowly down the stairs, not making a sound. Y/n stops abruptly seeing Isla and Walker sharing a small kiss on the couch, in true awkward teenage fashion, Isla’s hands at her sides and Walker's hand on her upper back, the other at his side. 

Walking back up the stairs, and waiting a moment the woman makes an over exaggerated amount of noise. Not wanting to embarrass the two that she saw them, “I ordered the pizza! One large cheese, one large vegetarian, and one medium meat lover for your Dad. But Walker, you're welcome to have some of that.” “Thanks Y/n.” Isla said, giving Y/n a look that said ‘go away, this is the same reason I didn’t want my Dad here’ but both of them know that Eddie would be way worse. “Okay.. That’s all, back to it.”

-

As soon as the door closes, Isla jumps around and lets out a squeal that was close to deafening. “Oh my god! I’m so happy you got me to do that!” “So what led up to that kiss?” “Oh! I knew you saw it! God- that’s so embarrassing.” “Hey, I get it. I was a teenage girl once. And I did way more embarrassing things. Come on sit.” Patting the couch cushion next to her, “I wanna know everything.”

"After we kissed, he asked me out for tomorrow... And I was wondering if you could ask my Dad?" "No. You have to, but I can be there for you."

~taglist~

@whoscamila @mystargirl-interlude @creoleguurl @witchwolflea @kissmejoey @taylorswiftsloverfr @random000000sblog

[codename-adler]

hi queen what is the aftg x tlou 🧎 my two obsessions <3

this was the fricking hardest to answer bc it goes so deep and my love for tlou runs even deeper, and it's still in the works and very much not written, but at last! i have summoned enough brain power to give you this!

it all started here because of thanks to my love @cielalune and her beautiful beautiful turn out the lights ♥️♥️♥️

now in no particular order nor sense

the final starting lineup:

Wymack as Joel

Kevin as Sarah

Rhemann as Tommy

Abby as Tess

Neil as Ellie

the goal is a Wymack-centric fic. i want him love him need him so bad, i'm gonna dedicate a fic to him and ruin his life. ain't no other love language baby. all of the fic, except specific episode-chapters like Bill & Frank, or Ellie & Riley, will be from Wymack's pov. no unreliable narrator Neil i'm afraid beloved. i fucking challenged myself and i'm beginning to regret it.

Andreil?

perhaps a smidge, that sweet sweet baby carrot dangling before the mule, but it is in no way an Andreil-centric fic. sorries.

what about other ships and characters?

hehe. i am having FUN. i'm breaking glass ceilings, tearing down walls, pushing through barriers. some unique flavors one might say. don't worry you'll have your fill of lengthy cameos. mouth zipped shut for now tho. unless i'm persuaded...

Exy?

i hardly know her... eh tbh i have no idea yet what kind of world pre-Cordyceps i'm going to play with.

game or show?

both. HBO TLoU + game pt. 1 + pt. 2... ouchies. the fic will not be a series however. it's going to be long af, but one fic only. i know the end.

the itinerary?

canon tlou, to the south. 10 locations for now. same route shape. aftg canon relevant. figure it out.

the soundtrack?

BANGER. OMNIPRESENT. you know it. the HBO show soundtrack is my reason to breathe. they get it. they sooooo get it. - teaser 1: the code is 70s for "nothing new" / 80s for "new message" / 90s for "trouble" because that's when all the youngsters of our beloved aftg cast were born ;) (subject to change tho, but as of now the songs and plotlines involving this code work well) - teaser 2: the main/theme song i'm feeling for the fic is

trying to come up with a title around that, so far no luck. the wip title remains "aftg x tlou", sadly... yikes.

coming to ao3 when?

not soon at all. 3 chapters are outlined so far, and they cover three fourths of episode one. each chapter works as an episode. one episode of the HBO show equals to several chapters/episodes of the fic. i'm combining game 1 & 2 into one biiiiiiiig stretch like i said so. i'm screwed.

[eschergirls]

Hi everybody!  

It's a new month so it's time to thank our amazing Patreon supporters and to give a site update!

As some of you may have already noticed, the site has undergone the revamp I promised.  Mobile users shouldn't notice too big a change outside of the "featured tags" section and "topics" now associated with each posts, but desktop users will notice that the site is also arranged in a grid format now instead of one long column.  The reason for that change is to make more efficient use of screen space and to make it easier to browse.  Under the old layout, on desktop the site was a long list of pictures with the first line of each post next to it.  Since the first line of a lot of posts is "X submitted", that often led to massive amounts of blank space.  It also isn't very informative.  I hope the grid makes it easier for people to browse and the new "topic" attached to each post will give people an idea on the tag I think best describes the post.  There's also now a tag cloud with featured tags above for people to click on and look through.  It's a combination of mediums (comics, anime, video games, advertising, etc) and pose/post types (boobs and butt pose, boobflounder, centuar women, etc).

I want to give special thanks to Tess (socketwench) who designed the site and helps maintain it for her work in the revamp.  You can check out her personal site here if you're interested in knowing more about her or hiring her for work (she's very talented).

I hope the new format works for people.  If anybody has any suggestions on ways to further improve the site, the layout, or have a better idea for the colour scheme (I worry purple on white might be hard on some people's eyes), please do not hesitate to let me know!  

There's also now a button that links here (to Tumblr) and to our RSS feed for those who want to follow that way. (For newbies, RSS stands for Really Simple Syndication and is basically a feed you can read using an RSS reader. Simply copy and paste https://eschergirls.com/rss.xml into an RSS reader and it will keep you up to date on Escher Girls!)

As usual, I also spent the last month fixing up a lot of older broken posts, finding higher quality versions of old images, sourcing older posts that lacked sources, and replacing images that no longer are being hosted.

Some of the posts I fixed last month are:

This wormgirl DVD Cover of Gun x Sword vol. 4 

An old submission of Force Works art that includes both Scarlet Witch and Wonder Man (for gender equality)

Two very strange posts from Magical Girl Apocalypse, one featuring a rubber spine and the other a rubber boob

Two posts featuring an ostrich woman from the MMO Revelation Online

A League of Angels II ad featuring a centaur woman

A Teen Titans cover showing Rose Wilson as a 2-dimensional snake

I also fixed up 6 more DC Comics Artemis posts for those interested in seeing them: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5], [6].

And now I want to thank all the amazing people who supported us in July on Patreon.  I really appreciate all of your support (and just any support in general) because it helps me pay for domain costs and independent hosting, as well as for site upgrades like the ones last month, and just helps me generally maintain and run the site.

So thank you so so much to:

Anne Adler Cat Mara CheerfulOptimistic Chris McKenzie Em Bardon First Time Trek Greg Sepelak Ian Cameron Ken Trosaurus Kevin Carson Kim Wincen Leak Manuel Dalton Mary Kuhner Max Schwarz Michael Mazur Miriam Pody Morgan McEvoy randomisedmongoose Rebecca Breu Ringoko Ryan Gerber Sam Mikes Sean Sea SpecialRandomCast Thomas

And also thank you as always to everybody who just generally reads and interacts with the site, and to everybody who submits images and captions!  Also thank you to people who send me messages letting me know if a post has a mistake in it, let me know if a post didn't go up on the site, and just in general give me any feedback.  I really do appreciate it all. :)

Thank you again,

Ami

If you have any issues with the site or suggestions to improve it, please do not hesitate to contact me and let me know!

If you wish to support Escher Girls, you can subscribe to our Patreon at: https://www.patreon.com/ami_angelwings or donate through Ko-Fi at: https://ko-fi.com/amiangelwings.

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[denimbex1986]

'Marvel's Brie Larson and Peaky Blinders' Cillian Murphy fans can now see the duo in action thriller Free Fire, which has just landed on Netflix UK.

The 2017 film, which was directed by acclaimed filmmaker Ben Wheatley, follows Larson's character Justine and her fight for survival after a black-market arms deal she organises between two IRA members and a gang turns fatal.

Murphy and Kill List's Michael Smiley play the two Irishmen, Chris and Frank, while Call Me By Your Name's Armie Hammer portrays arms dealer Ord.

Other cast members include Sam Riley (Maleficent), Enzo Cilenti (The Serpent Queen), Sharlto Copley (Russian Doll), Babou Ceesay (Rogue One), Jack Reynor (Midsommar) and Noah Taylor (A Small Light).

While Free Fire was a misfire at the box office, grossing just $3.8 million worldwide compared to its $7 million budget, it is certified fresh on review aggregator Rotten Tomatoes with a respectable critics score of 70%.

Larson was last seen on the big screen back in May playing Mr Nobody's (Kurt Russel) daughter Tess in Fast X.

The Marvel actress will next been seen in Apple TV+'s drama series Lessons in Chemistry this October, where she'll star as scientist Elizabeth Zott opposite The Big Bang Theory's Kevin Sussman.

Meanwhile, Murphy is gearing up for the release of Christopher Nolan's anticipated movie Oppenheimer next week.

The actor will star in the film as J. Robert Oppenheimer, who is known as the father of the atomic bomb after World War II. The dark drama will battle it out at the box office with Greta Gerwig's Barbie movie, as the two film's will both arrive in cinemas on the same day - July 21.'

[thisisincorrectlyus]

Kevin: I was- I was doing some heteronormative bullshit!

Tess: You were. Unbelievable.

Kevin: I apologize.

[thisiskevison]

Tess comes out to a stranger vs. Madison telling a stranger about her pregnancy 

― requested by @ourfinehouse

[vickyjona]

Chapters: 2/2 Fandom: The 4400 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Kevin Burkhoff/Tess Doerner Characters: Kevin Burkhoff, Tess Doerner Summary:

Kevin and Tess meet again after the promicin threat has been eradicated and finally get married.

My first shot at writing fanfiction, but the characters are not mine. Takes place the last time we see Kevin and Tess parting ways at the elevator where she leaves to visit her grandniece.

[saavik2285]

My Weyoun corner.

[elder-schraderham]

“I spent six years in a mental institution suffering from paranoid schizophrenia and you pulled me out of it into the middle of a conspiracy!”

List of favorite Jeffrey Combs characters. [10/??] Kevin Burkhoff {The 4400} Suggested by @sarah1228

[my-yesterdays87]

From this moment on

After reading “Promise City” by Greg Cox, I became even more obsessed with Tess and Kevin’s relationship, than I’ve been while watching The 4400, and decided they needed closure...

Beware! If you haven’t read the book -obviously- spoilers ahead.

After returning from a secret mission, whose mere purpose was to rescue Richard Tyler once again, Tess was still in shock and kept muttering “Kevin, my Kevin” even after she was safe in his arms. The introverted scientist held her clumsily, strocking her hair gently and kept rocking her back and forth, following her movement rather than his own. Her fingers were clenched around his other arm, which kept hold of her trembling form. “I didn’t mean to.”, she sobbed again and Kevin placed a gently kiss on her hairline. “I know.”

“... What happened at the prison was the last straw...”

After a while, her words grew meeker, her face buried deeper into his sweater, but the shaking didn't stop. Ever so gently his hand reached for the syringe, piercing her skin to inject the tranquilizer. Almost immediately, Tess grew numb in his arms, still mumbling and her weight against his body grew heavier with each passing second. How could he keep exposing them to this frightening world, when all they ever wanted was to win peace? Kevin kept her in his arms a little while longer, thinking hard to come to a satisfying conclusion for this messed up situation. At long last he’d known what to do since Collier had found them in their hideout weeks ago, after all. Kevin had some difficulties laying her down and pulling his jacket over her sleeping form, but it was the easiest decision he’d ever made, when he turned on his computer and started to delete his files and statistics. All the while thinking about their past and future and making up his mind for good.

“... Tess has already suffered too much...“

Kevin turned off the computer at last and looked around his laboratory. He had once believed that his whole life was in his research. In the vials and data he had so thoroughly collected. It had needed a personality disorder and a determined young woman to make him aware that he had been entirely wrong. The scientist’s eyes came to rest on Tess’ sleeping form and one of these rare smiles appeared on his lips. “Where would I find another you?“, he asked himself in a barely audible whisper and stood to make his way out of this miserable place. - His girlfriend’s sleeping form safe in his arms.

“...I can’t let anything else happen to her...”

When Tess woke up, she was entirely clueless about her surroundings. She was laying rather uncomfortable in the frontseat of a car, her head resting on someone’s lap. Sleepily she moved up, hardly realising that an arm had been draped over her sleeping form and looked out the window. Nothing looked familiar at first, but turning her head, she smiled in relieve. “Kevin.“, Tess murmured, watching the man behind the weel, sleeping in what seemed like a rather uncomfortable position himself. The older man woke with a start, looking around feeverishly. It took him a little while to come around. His hands rubbed his face, trying to come to his senses after a long night of driving through who knows where. “Where are we, Kevin?“, Tess asked, placing a hand on his arm, to get his attention. Her boyfriend turned his head and looked at her for so long, she was almost sure he wasn’t going to answer her question. “Does it matter?“, he asked at last, moving his hand to cup her face, brushing away the tears that wet her rosy cheek. “I am sorry I took you with me, without your consent.“, he admitted with a rather hoarse voice. “I am sorry you had to go through so much heartbreak, until I saw what was right in front of me.“, Kevin paused for a second, looking straight ahead of them in order to gather his courage. “All we need is just the two of us.“, he declared. letting his arm drop beside him. Tess felt her heart miss a beat, when he finally looked back at her with an unprecedented sparkle in his eyes and felt the warmth of his words engulfe her. “Nothing you could say or do could ever stop my loving you.“, she answered in tears, placing her hand on his, before finally moving over to sit right next to him. She leaned her head onto his shoulder, allowing his arm to embrace her once again. This time Tess’ eyes fell shut out of the comfort of him beeing near. She was still exhausted and the pictures of the small woman smashing into thousands of pieces, would give her nightmares for many many days to come, but he was beside her and they were finally on their own. Kevin started the engine and they drove off. From this moment on their life would be theirs alone.

“... Don’t come and find us...”