#keep this freak the FUCK AWAY from my food and health!!!

[mugiwara-lucy]

In my next installment of ALL GAS AND NO BRAKES UNTIL NOVEMBER 6TH, I'd like to remind everyone about this idiot:

And this is a guy that Trump says will not only be in charge of Food Handling but WOMEN'S HEALTH TOO:

I'd like to go into this guy's history shown down below:

This guy has NOT ONLY KILLED ANIMALS but cheated on his wife to the point where he committed SUICIDE. Not only that but he's a misogynistic liar like Trump who's Anti-Vax lies led to the deaths of EIGHTY THREE PEOPLE IN SAMOA:

And he bragged about having a freezer of ROAD KILL:

Let's go down the list; having a National Abortion Ban, RFK Jr in charge of women's health and food handling and Trump's camp banning Medicare and Medicaid along with Social Security and them dismantling FEMA and privatizing Weather Broadcasts......the death toll in America will be IMMENSE.

While you guys sit on that, here is the link to register to vote along with the deadlines varying by state! Also, your own vote isn’t enough! Get as many people as you can to vote for Kamala be it your friends, cousins, parents, grandparents, old friends from high school and college, coworkers, boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives, stepchildren (if they’re 18 and over) and the list goes on and on but every vote counts! ALSO PLEASE check your registration DAILY because MAGA WILL purge your voter registration!!

And early voting has started! And if you don’t wanna vote on November 5th, Early Voting is another option! Like I said get as many people as you know and try early voting that way you can avoid MAGA fuckery on November 5th! Here’s the link down below listing the dates by state:

Mail in Ballots are ANOTHER option I highly recommend!! And like I said get as many people as you can to take advantage of this option! BUT if you decide to go with Mail In/Absentee Ballots; PLEASE mail your ballots at the ACTUAL USPS office!! That way MAGAts won't fuck with it.

And lastly voting abroad is something I’ve seen people take advantage of and i HIGHLY recommend it!! Here’s the link!!

Trump wants to let a weird old guy with BRAIN WORMS in his own words "go wild":

If you listen to him talk, the asshole LITERALLY sounds like he's one foot from the grave. And again he bragged about having a FREEZER OF ROADKILL;

VOTE ACCORDINGLY.

[idontmindifuforgetme]

don’t know if you’ve already shared (or if you wouldn’t like to) but i’d love to hear about your resolutions and goals for this year!

Hi so sorry for how late this is!! I have quite a few!

Ins —

Being more decisive. Trusting myself w calling the shots. Just making a decision and sticking w it.

Financial literacy

More reading. Just more.

Attacking things I’m uncomfortable with instead of shying away from them.

More silence. I don’t need to have my earphones in all the time

More time w family!!! I need to put in as much effort to connect w them as I do w my friends

Green tea every night

More pictures. I have a serious problem of just not being incentivized to take any

More scientific literature for fun!!

Piggybacking off that point—making it instinctive to apply things I study to real life situations. This is a niche one but it just helps me process stuff faster and I just think it’s a super dope learning technique

Pushing myself harder. It’s just not my preference to be mediocre.

Nourishing myself w my own affirmations. Cutting out my need for other people’s validation

Educational documentaries

Making more of an effort to connect w my Arab heritage

Being my natural self. It’s okay if I’m not bubbly all the time. Sometimes I just want to chill

Whole foods

Less phone time (I say this every year but like I want 2024 to be the year I’m truly disconnected/using my phone in a healthy way)

Body oils!

More tennis dates w friends!

10k steps a day

Sticking religiously to my hour by hour schedule

Keeping promises to myself as ardently as I keep promises to others

Being more bold w fashion!!

Hitting the gym 5 days a week

Reading more literature in Arabic and French

Learning how to cook. I cannot live off Siggi’s for the rest of my life lol

Exploring more music genres

Learning the piano!!

No longer feeling guilty for withholding information. Privacy is not a bad thing.

Getting more and more independent!!

Becoming the friend I want to be. Other people need to show up as well, but I can’t hold people up to standards I myself can’t reach.

Outs —

Centralizing luxury brands. Thinking that price equates to quality. The fact of the matter is quality equates to quality. Price is irrelevant.

Relying on snap judgment responses to situations. I need to learn to wait at least 15 minutes. I can be impulsive asf

Jumpiness. Nervous energy. I just want to be more calm and controlled in how I carry myself. I want to exude self-assuredness

Checking my phone first thing in the morning!!

Drinking less than 3 liters of water a day

Being available all the fucking time. If someone has an issue w me for being busy, maybe they’re not someone I want in my life in the first place.

Being too forgiving. Not immediately allowing someone back into my life doesn’t make me a bitch. Immediately running to fix things w someone doesn’t make me selfless. Being the bigger person in situations where I was nowhere near in the wrong doesn’t make me mature. It’s just symptomatic of a lack of boundaries.

Consuming dumb shit in the name of “keeping up w pop culture.” I don’t care about celebrity controversy #7282727. I don’t care about celebrity selfie #827226. It doesn’t elevate my life in any way. I legit just don’t care. And this goes for real life gossip w friends too

Taking too long to text back!! A day is fine, but sometimes I take longer and I think that’s a shitty trait to have. I can absolutely afford to respond to people faster.

Too much chocolate!! I’m a sweet tooth but I must preserve my skin/overall health

Motivation over discipline. I need to be attuned to discipline always.

Control freak antics. I can’t control people. It’s not my responsibility. They’ll act how they act. All I can do is control my reaction to it

Rumination/unhealthy venting. When I’m done w something, I’m done w something.

Overcompensating for other people’s shortcomings. It’s not my responsibility to coddle others. It’s okay if something is too much for me.

Having no boundaries w others. People aren’t entitled to private information. It doesn’t make me deceptive to withhold things—it just makes me selective. People need to earn private details about me.

Curating things I like. I simply like what I like. It’s not that deep.

[somanyratsinthewalls]

Burning Hearts Chapter 2

Pairing: Law x Straw Hat Zoan Type (named) FemOC 

Word Count: 2500

Summary: You were teleported across the globe in an instant, away from your crew. Your body was badly broken and beaten, thrust into the harsh landscape of a Northern island. You are discovered by the Heart Pirates and brought back to health. Startled upon waking up in a foreign place with an unfamiliar crew, you are shocked with the news that you’ll be spending two years there. Trafalgar Law, the captain of the Heart Pirates has made a promise to train you, but will it become something more than a mentor relationship?

Chapter 1 - Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

Burning Hearts Chapter 2: The 2 Year Sentence

— — 

“So would you rather eat 200 spiders… or spend a week in Impel Down?” Shachi asks his cohort from a desk chair as he flips through a News Coo. 

“Spiders for sure. I’m not built for prison.” Penguin responds as he lazily tosses a tennis ball against the cold, steel walls of the surgical bay. 

It had been 4 days of keeping the new mysterious patient sedated while her body healed from its grievous injuries. Shachi and Penguin took shifts watching over her during the night and double teamed the job during the day, all while administering the necessary sedative drugs. The boys were the only two crew members occupying the safe house while the rest of the Heart Pirates accompanied their Captain to the crisis at Marine Ford. 

Shachi sips from a can of cola and flips the page. Several minutes of silence go by, the only sounds to be heard were the slow rhythmic beeping from the winged girl’s heart rate monitor and the sharp thumping of Penguin’s tennis ball against the wall. 

“Would you rather have crayons for teeth or live shrimp for nipples?” Shachi asks, desperate to fill the hours with some sort of entertainment. Penguin holds onto the tennis ball and thinks for a minute. 

“Could they be white crayons?” Penguin follows up. 

“Sure. But they’d still melt if you ate hot foods.” Shachi flips another page. 

“I’d still pick the crayons. I think you’d be able to see the shrimp through my jumpsuit…” Penguin looks down to his chest. “Ok my turn.” Penguin sits up straighter and turns towards Shachi. 

“Fuck, Marry, Kill… pancakes, waffles, French toast.”

Shachi looks up from his News Coo finally, his eyebrows knitted together. 

“Dude that doesn’t even make any sense, how am I supposed to-“ 

*BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP*

“Wait why is its heart rate increasing…?!” Penguin sits up on the heels of his hands and looks at the monitor. 

Shachi puts down the News Coo and rises from the chair. He approaches the monitor. “It shouldn’t be… we just injected her 30 minutes ago…” Shachi checks the IV line to make sure it was still clear and functional. It was. Shachi’s heart dropped into his stomach. The patient was waking up despite the heavy dose of sedatives. The patient who had broken a cabinet and two steel medical carts the last time she decided to-

*BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP*

“Oh shit oh fuck oh shit oh fuck-“ Penguin’s eyes widen as he panics, standing up. 

“Calm down.. Don’t freak… the Captain put her in sea prism shackles this time… she can’t break them…” Shachi tries to calm his crewmate. Penguin would have maybe believed him if he didn’t notice Shachi’s obvious shaking and heavy breathing. 

The woman’s eyes flutter open.

“Whhdsshhshhh hnnnn..?” Garbled nonsense slipped from the woman’s lips. Her eyes were fully open, but they struggled to find something to focus on. “Whrr mmeye? Why cnteye moovvvv?” The words come out in drunk, mushy syllables. 

The woman, Daisy, as the Captain had insisted they call her, was weakly pulling at her restraints but failing miserably. Unlike her impressive showing before, the sea prism stone had sapped all of her energy. Upon realizing they still had control of the situation, Penguin and Shachi move to flank the body on the operating table. They stare down at the woman’s wide, panicked eyes, unable to find a target to look at fully. One eye was brown and one was grey. The way the eyes frantically searched for something made them seem like two different people were occupying this body.

Shachi and Penguin looked back up at each other before looking down at the confused, bound woman. 

“Um. Hi. So, this is probably really weird for you but-“ Shachi nervously starts. 

“Nnrfffffhh? Lufffnnuyy? EWrhrrhrwrrss louuuffyy?” 

“I have no idea what you’re saying. The sea prism stone around your wrist is probably melting your brain right now. I’d love to take it off but you tried to kill us last time we did that, and the Captain has specific orders.” Shachi explains the situation to the disoriented patient. “And until he gets back we have to keep you out, little bat.” 

Shachi sidles over to the steel medical cart and retrieves one of the emergency sedative syringes. 

*BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP* 

“Mmmpph!! Nhhh!! Lsssttnn luffnnn!! Kzzrroo hrrrmppp!!” The girl huffs out as her head lolls to the side, body completely limp due to the sea prism. It was clear to both men that she was trying to resist. 

“Shach maybe we should hear her out.. I don’t know if we shoul-“ Penguin moves around to the other side of the operating table to stand beside Shachi. 

Shachi readies the emergency syringe. 

“Since when are you a vampire sympathizer? You were calling her an “it” five minutes ago, I don’t want to hear the savior act now.” 

Penguin sighs at Shachi’s response. He backs off. 

“NNPNNHH!! WATTPHHH!!” Daisy groans out as Shachi delivers over 100 cc’s of sedative right into the her exposed thigh. 

“Lufffy!! Hrrlllp...” The woman’s eyes roll back in her head and her body becomes limp against the operating table once again. 

— — — 

*We’re too weak! Run away!* 

“Shit…” 

You were awoken from your nightmare by a violent heaving in your throat. 

“Oof-“ 

You push yourself up as far as you can go before turning yourself to the side and letting go of the tension. Your stomach contents are heaved forward into the conveniently places trash receptacle on the side of the surgery table you were strapped to. Your body lurches against the restraints involuntarily. After a painful few moments of heaving, you feel the shackles on your arms and legs release.

You didn’t care how it happened, you were just happy that you could fully hold yourself over the trash can to vomit. 

After the wave of nausea passes, you slump down on the cold, metal floor and try to catch your breath. You allow your eyes to close as you relish in the feeling of being unrestrained. 

“Rito Daisy…” A deep, booming voice comes from the darkest corner of the now dimly lit operating room. 

Your eyes snap open. You wipe your mouth. Your head whips towards the sound. 

“I’m not going to hurt you. I’m-“ 

“That ‘Surgeon of Death’ guy. From that shit at the auction house. I know who you are.” You state in between labored breaths, finally regaining your mental clarity. You back yourself up against the wall of the surgical suite, putting the metal barf bucket in front of you. 

Law steps out of the shadow and stands before you. 

“Then you know I don’t take the news of an enemy showing up in my camp lightly.” Law sets his large sword down against the medical cabinet. You notice that someone has repaired it since you had destroyed it with your wings during your last attempt to break out.  

Your wings. 

You realized now you were in your full human form. What good could your wings do here? Always able to carry you away from any problem… but not now… you were trapped… again… 

“Miss Rito my name is Trafalgar Law and you crashed into our base camp several days ago. Your body was badly damaged. I sewed your…” Law swallows.  “…appendages… back together. Your bones have still not yet completely healed, which is why I’ve had you sedated.” Law explains methodically as he sits down in the desk chair. 

You couldn’t escape. This asshole was so confident in his ability to best you that he was lounging in his office chair while you were completely unrestrained. You weren’t an idiot, you knew that you were at the mercy of this strange man. You had no idea where your blades were anyway. Probably lost in that avalanche. Shit

“Where’s my Captain?” You asked blankly. 

There was a long pause. 

“He is alive.” Law eventually states. 

You stare at each other. 

After a few moments, Law pulls a News Coo from his jeans pocket and tosses across the floor of the surgical suite at you. 

You refuse to break eye contact with Law, still suspicious of his intention. You pick up the News Coo and open it in your lap. 

“I’m not going to hurt you, Rito Daisy.” Law cocks his head at you, prompting you to begin reading the article. 

You keep your gaze on on the ice grey eyes of Trafalgar Law. This tense stare lasted for a few moments before you decide you had no choice but to peruse the article. 

The air in the med bay became so thick you could eat it by the spoonful. 

“Ace is dead… Two years… Become stronger…” You sigh and gaze absently at the newspaper. “What the fuck am I supposed to do?” You close the newspaper and look up at your captor. 

“You’ll stay with me. I will train you.” Law meets your gaze. 

You furrow your brows. 

You burst out laughing. 

“HAH! Yeah I don’t think so.”  

“Your captain ordered that you stay here.” 

You were in shock. There was no way Luffy would ask you to spend any amount of time let alone 2 years with an enemy pirate captain. You must have heard him incorrectly. There must be some mistake. 

“… What?” You look up into Law’s frigid, grey eyes. 

“I saved your captain’s life after the battle at Marine Ford. Once he regained clarity, I told him my crew mates had found one of his. He made me promise to not allow you to try and find him or the rest of your crew. I promised him that I would train you and give you access to the strength that will prepare you for the New World.” Law explains. 

Your eyes widened further. 

“You can either stay to train,” Law reaches an arm towards you to help you off the ground. “Or you can go against your Captain’s orders.” Law raises an eyebrow. 

There was a long pause. If this was truly what Luffy wanted, you didn’t have much of a choice. Without breaking his gaze, you clasp your hand around Law’s elbow and allow him to pull you up. 

“We are not allies. We are not friends. I am here at the orders of my captain.” You state as you rise to your feet. 

“Understood, Miss Rito. It may help you to know that I'm not pleased with the situation either. I’ll show you to your room.” 

— — —

You walked through the unfriendly, unfamiliar metal halls of the Heart Pirate’s base with your new mentor leading you. After several minutes of silence, Law arrives at a steel door and opens it. Inside the room was a small closet, single bed, desk, and half bookshelf. There was a small window behind the bed. The bed had two white pillows and a grey quilt. Not only did this place feel like a prison, it really looked like one too. You grimaced as you looked over the sterile environment before noticing something laying on the bed. It was your bag and blades. 

“My stuff!” 

You pushed past Law who was still in the doorway, bumping him into the frame in the process. He straightened himself and watched you rip open your tattered, filthy backpack and empty it out onto the bed. You sift through the contents to make sure everything was still inside. 

You brush your hands over each item. Hope flutters in your heart at the sight of familiar things. Your sword sharpening stone, your botanists notebook and pens, a spare set of clothes, a pink hairbrush and hair elastics, and an empty glass container that had been previously been filled with banana pudding. Sanji always made sure to slip your favorite treat in your bag before leaving the ship for the day. You smiled remembering how lush it tasted, feeling glad that you had eaten it on Sabaody so it didn’t go to waste. 

You come across a crumpled paper. You flattened it out to reveal a photograph of You, Nami, Robin and Chopper. Nami was pinching Chopper’s fluffy little cheek, the blush evident on his face. You and Robin were arm in arm and laughing. A third hand was behind your head making little bunny ears. You all looked so happy. Your smile faded. Were they okay? And everyone else? There was no way of knowing… 

Tears started welling in your eyes so you put the photo down. 

“Wait where’s my-“ You realize that your personal bag of herbs was missing. 

“This?” 

You turn around to face Law. He was holding a small, red woolen satchel in his hand that you knew contained your stash along with some paper and a butane lighter. The drawstring bag dangled from his tattooed fist. 

E, A, T, H. 

“That belongs to me, give it back.” 

“I do not tolerate illegal drug use in my base. I’m disposing of it.” Law shoves the bag back into his jeans pocket. 

“I’ll smoke outside then, shit. Just hand it over. Also, illegal drug use? We’re pirates… isn’t everything we do technically illegal?” 

Law ignores you and turns to leave the room. You were irritated by his refusal to answer you and refusal to return your bag. You grab one of your twin blades that were resting against the bed frame. As you unsheathe the blade, a shooting unbearable pain throbs in your shoulder causing you to drop your weapon onto the floor, the metal hitting metal making a loud clatter. 

“Fuck!” You cry out and grab your arm, head beginning to spin from the pain. 

“Your body is still healing. You’re in no shape for a fight. Training begins when you’ve recovered.” Law heads out of your room without closing the door and is already halfway down the hall. “Bathroom is down the hall. Dinner’s at 7.” 

You hear his footsteps fade away as he disappears deeper into the base. You were alone. You look around the bare bedroom and reality sets in. You were going to have to be here for 2 years… 

You flop down face first onto the bed and begin to cry. 

xx

Authors note- thank you to anyone who is reading this self indulgent series. Sorry if it’s weird, gotta set up the story before we get to all the smoochin. Are you guys into this? It’s my first real series so I’d love feedback. Love y’all :)

[onmyyan]

Hey-o!!! Mind racing anon here I just reread through your venomreader x yandere batfam AGAIN! And my mind started racing

What if while reader is captured in the timeout cube and they start getting sick. Like venom hasn’t eaten anyone in awhile and like in the movie starts to eat his host aka reader.

So reader starts becoming pale and weak and coughing and throwing up blood from having their organs literally being eaten to sustain the symbiote and the batfam sees this and it leads to absolute CHAOS!!!

I’m talking arguments and fights breaking out between them about what to do and how to help reader.

I think Bruce would try and figure out why reader is all of a sudden sick and want to do tests and scans to help find the reason. But he starts to get more and more worried as readers health declines and there is nothing coming up on any results. He tries everything he can think of but it doesn’t help his children are becoming manic and going crazy so he has to try to keep order all the time.

But then you have Jason going absolutely FERAL trying to get to reader and take them to a hospital and hold them and comfort them because he can’t believe he let it get this far when he swore to protect them. He stands outside of readers room and begs them to let him know what’s happening and how he can help. He brings them all kinds of medicine and food, he even brings reader some weed from their hidden stash to try and keep them calm or help in anyway. His eyes are red and puffy all the time from him crying every time he sees reader weakly throw up or cough up their blood.

Dick is freaking out and won’t let reader out of his sight but every time reader coughs or vomits or starts to collapse he’s crying and begging Bruce to do something or he will. He’s tried braking into the room to get you (they all have) but Bruce changed the code or something so nobody tries to run off with them.

Tim pours through all security footage trying to see if maybe you poisoned yourself with something in order to try and escape or at least trying to find what caused all of this but he’s coming up empty, he starts getting desperate and researches every disease known to man. He now goes through every checklist of symptoms he can to figure out what’s wrong. He also know knows way too much about diseases and if reader ever get a sniffle or a cough after this he immediately thinks their dying.

And Damien put on the face of not caring in front of his family. He looked as if he’s unbothered by everything but his room was destroyed the same day all of this started and he had barely slept or ate. None of them have. He’s started to stalk the outside of readers cell as if he was guarding them and he watches everything reader does. He claims it’s to make sure reader isn’t tricking them by doing this to themselves but it’s really because his mind has made him believe reader might die and because of that thought he can’t stand being farther than a couple steps away. He’s surprisingly the one who advocates the strongest to let reader out in order to help them and he becomes manic at the thought of returning the next day and reader being dead in the cell and he CANT handle it.

Meanwhile reader is just like well…fuck… and debates on telling them about venoms diet but knows they can’t because then reader is admitting to letting venom eat people and that is SURE to go over well with the vigilantes against killing and all that🙄🙄🙄

Anyway yeah I am feral for yandere batfam

Also I know this is long but I love it and I love you and merry late Christmas and happy new year and yeah❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Bonus:

Venom!Reader: yeah I’m a monster now and I don’t deserve love because of the horrible things I’ve done

Yandere Batfam: You have never done anything wrong in your life. We know this. And we love you.

Venom!Reader: *surprised pikachu face*

2nd Bonus:

Batfam member: I hate that alien that has attached itself to you. If I had it my way it would be kept in a jar for the rest of its days studies by scientists.

Reader: Venom said if he had to choose for me to marry someone he would pick you.

Batfam member: You know I’ve always thought aliens were cool. I think Venom is actually a really good influence on you and you should definitely listen to him more often. *pulls out a ring and gets on one knee*

This is absolutely amazing and genuinely lit a spark under me regarding that story, thank you so so much for sending in this wonderful piece it's delectable, I've been having serious writers block with that series and this single ask had me running to the editor cuz it's so good like?? Of course your body would break down without it's needs being met it's so perfect, again thank you for sending this in cuz it inspired me ❤️❤️❤️ you go glen coco

[random-writing-thoughts]

Omg pleaseee (if you can of course hehe) continue prompt 204 it’s so freaking good

Been dealing with some pretty serious health problems for the last little bit. Sorry for not posting.

But here is a continuation!!!

Taglist: @arealphrooblem, @xynthevoid, @honorata2021

If you want to get added let me know!!!

Thought #204.5

Previous

Warnings: claustrophobia, bones being broken, swearing

Hero crawled through the vents.

Again.

She had her eyes shut and was moving as fast as she could. She felt a vent at her fingertips. She opened her eyes and looked all the way down at Sidekick.

Sidekick was lounging on his chair drinking his fifth soda and laughing at his phone.

"Finally found someone who wants to go on a date with you yet asshole?" She yelled through the grate.

Sidekick rolled his eyes and took a sip from his drink. "Ready to give up yet princess?"

Hero scoffed and kicked out the grate. She wiggled out of it and landed on top of the vents below her.

Sidekick stood fast.

She leaned back on her hands and shrugged. "Nah, I think I'll sit up here for a while. I actually don't mind this punishment."

He started walking towards the vents.

"Good luck." She sang. "Pretty sure I can out run you."

He stepped back and glared at her. "Get down. Now."

She smiled down at him. "Make me."

"You bitch. Why can't you just..."

"Conform to the rules?" She spit back. "Become a robot in this fucked up group." She stood. "Get sent on missions to steal, murder and cause terror and havoc. So Villain can become richer and more powerful?" She crossed her arms and looked down at him. "I would rather die."

"Bitch." Sidekick yelled. "Get down from there."

Hero sat down. "No. I think I'm going to live up here. You can't control me. I don't have to do anything. I can just wait out my contract and then I can leave."

Sidekick laughed as the door opened. "Number one you would die because you don't have food. Number two you actually aren't holding up your end of the contract. And number three..."

Someone walked into the room.

"We have people here that can help solve these problems."

The person standing next to Sidekick disappeared and appeared next to Hero.

She squealed and stood fast. She recognized them. The resident teleporter. The asshole that was everywhere and was always called to set people right.

She ran across the vent and found the one she had crawled out of and jumped into it scrambling back inside.

Well tried.

Teleporter grabbed her ankle and started pulling her back.

She kicked at them and held onto the vent for dear life.

"Come on Hero. You're just making this harder for yourself." They said pulling on her ankle again.

She scoffed and kicked out again.

Teleporter laughed and grabbed her other ankle pulling her out of the vent in one swift movement.

She squealed as Teleporter caught her. "You never could get away from me."

They smiled down at her and teleported back to Sidekick's side.

Hero scowled at both of them. "Assholes. Both of you. Why can't you just leave me alone?"

Telporter dropped her to the floor and shrugged. "I just do what I'm told."

Hero threw back her head and collapsed to the ground.

Sidekick grabbed her arm and bent over her. "Now why would I do such a thing?"

He pulled her to her feet. "It's my job I'm just going to keep doing what I need to to get you in line."

Hero pushed him back and flipped him off with her free hand.

Sidekick grabbed her wrist tightly. He pulled her close and looked at Teleporter.

"You can go." He said through clenched teeth.

Teleporter nodded and disappeared.

His gaze dropped to hers. "You don't get to treat me like this. I am your mentor. I don't care if you want that. I don't care if you hate me. I don't care about you."

He tightened his grip on her wrist. She let out a small whimper.

"The only thing I care about is making Villain happy. He wants you to be, as you so kindly put it, a robot in this fucked up group."

She glared at him and pulled against his grip.

"If that's your plan, then I am going to do everything to make it harder." She said with fire behind her eyes. "They already tried for 9 months and nothing happened. What could you possibly do in 3?"

Sidekick took a deep breath. "I won't believe you when you pretend to be following the rules. And..."

He bent her wrist back until there was a snap.

Hero screamed and pulled against Sidekick.

He let go of her and she fell to her knees cradling her wrist.

He crouched in front of her. "I'm not afraid to hurt you. The others were because Villain, for some unknown reason, wants you to be on his team."

He grabbed her chin and pulled it up until their eyes met.

"He wants me to do anything and everything to get you on that team. Even if that includes breaking a few bones."

She glared at him through tears. "If you think that's going to change anything, you're crazy."

Sidekick smiled and pulled her to her feet. "It's worth a try."

[anotherghoul666]

HI FRIEND. For the emoji asks:

🥺

🤡

😈

😬

🤲

🧠 (for Swiss please!)

Hiiii dearest!! Thank you for the questionssss ❤️❤️❤️

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels? One thing that gives me the Feels while I write is the absolute acceptance and welcoming of differences. Probably because it's not something I had much of in my life before I got to feel it in recent years? So I want to write radical acceptance and a love of differences, be it disability, age, injury, mental health problems, neurodivergence, etc. Stuff like Aether in Loosened Heart being so radically loving and warm towards Dew despite Dew fighting him every step of the way as ferociously as he did. Or all the attention Seestor pays to Nihil's worsening sight in Secret Garden, the small ways in which she helps, readily, without criticizing it or blaming anything on him or on his disability. Or Copia in Loosened Heart being ready to tear down walls and make anything happen to find Dew the care he deserved and needed. Even if it meant being hit by Sister's wrath once he'd be home. He put himself on the line to save his ghoul and never blamed his injury once, nor would he in my brain if I imagine the arguments he'd have with Sister and the Clergy back home. It's never gonna be Dew's fault he got injured. There's a core aspect of a future part of the stripper!AU that's based on that concept too. Hits an emotional note for me.

🤡 What’s a line, scene, or exchange you’ve written that made you laugh? I got this question before, but I can give another example! Ok so from Blood Rush too (man this fic was fun!), the whole intro about the ghouls being cats. This is literally just me taking the "ghouls are just weird cats" shitposts floating around here and making it part of my canon a/b/o verse xD This paragraph especially: Hence the choice of ghouls. What they actually got when they started to pull ghouls of the pits was… Less of a docile animated corpse, and more like if you gave cats a human form and the endless power of free will. So, you know, disasters. Take the broad lines of cats, the sass, the cockiness, the superiority complex, the propensity to make evil plans, the endless appetite but only for that one specific food item that’s perfect in this moment, the braincell pop bubbles, the zoomies, the claws and fangs, the heat cycles. But put that in a human body, with prehensile thumbs, walking on two legs, one of the biggest brains in the animal kingdom, critical thinking and a sense of self. Oh, also mix that with magic. Because of course. Throw in a whole array of elemental powers the ghouls had as a sort of species classification system, which yes, made them more useful, as the Church hoped for, but also made them more destructive. Intelligent cats with magic powers. There was no way this could have gone without a hitch. Fuckingggg xD So fun to write man hahahaha

😈 Has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers? I just answered that one in my previous ask post here :)

😬 Which of your fics would you be most horrified for friends, family or coworkers to stumble upon? Friends: legit none. I have friends who know I write this shit and I have no problem with it. Most of my friends are part of the queer, poly and/or BDSM community, we're all a bunch of freaks. I don't keep company with people who are not open to my talking about kink and stuff, so. I would not care! Family: all of the kinky filthy fics stay away. They know I write fanfic cause I've done it since I was a kid under their roof, it's a constant in my life. And they know my Ghost obsession. They might have connected the dots, they might not have. I wouldn't mind if they came across my fluff or my hurt/comfort, but I'd rather we steer clear of the BDSM convo XD Coworkers: can fuck off as far away from my writing as they can XD My fiction writing stays very separate from my professional life. I guess if I imagine having to explain any of my fics to a family member or a cowowker, the worst one would be Blood Rush because of a/b/o? I'm not sure I want to sit my parents down to explain knots and slick? XD Or Drought, because same thing. Not sure I'd like to explain the appeal of licking someone's boot to my parents. Strippers, they'd get it; licking fingers I think they'd get it; choking might be a rough one too, ah shit yeah, Serotonin would be fucking weird to explain to an older generation eh? I feel like coworkers around my age or younger might get the whole choking thing better. Man I don't know XD

🤲 Would you please share a snippet of a wip? Sure, here's a bit of the lore section from the Aether/Ifrit titties fic I'm currently working on: "They were buddies, immediate good friends. [...] They’d catch their meals together, spend their free time hours together (Ifrit dragged Aether to the gym and training rooms; Aether dragged Ifrit to the library for some quiet time). They didn’t reside in the same dorms because their jobs were in different fields, but they might as well have: typically you’d find one of their beds empty and the other bed very overfilled, with how they had to squeeze both their entangled larger frames on a twin mattress. They made it work. Bros who also cuddled, kind of vibes. One more thing they shared was music."

🧠 Pick a character, and I'll tell you my favorite headcanon for them (for Swiss). Everything Swiss does is about power and control. Who has it, over what, who gives it, to what end, what is there to gain in a situation. Swiss is an incredibly analytic ghoul who calculates actions carefully (words are less careful; man has a damn leaking faucet of a mouth, that's one of his weaknesses), who manipulates the board to serve a purpose. Not always to his advantage, he'll put himself in situations where he's at a disadvantage too if that serves him, but he has to control it, to choose it. To be the one who made the decision. Swiss isn't the one to be influenced by others, he influences. He is peer pressure. Even when it looks like he's going along, it's cause it serves him to and it fits into a narrative. He's observant, he's sharp, he picks up on people's patterns easily. People are books, they're codes to crack, instruments to learn how to play and he wants to be a virtuoso at every instrument he takes a liking to. He's a multi-instrumentalist after all, and people can be read like music. This isn't in an evil way (though he won't shy away from using all this ammunition he's collected during play to satisfy a sadistic streak or get what he fancies), he'll manipulate people into better positions than they had before. He helps people by learning them inside out too. But yeah, power and control are always key. He's the guy that'll drop to his knees and blow someone for the control he has over whoever he's sucking off, you know? For Swiss to loose that control, to give up power for real? Good luck. Would take someone or something extremely special to shut a guy like that out of his schemes, out of his instincts. I wonder who could do that? ;) ;) ;)

[dahliathederanged]

Kleptomaniac

The unstoppable urge to steal.

Hi, my name is Irene and I’m a kleptomaniac. I’ve been struggling with it since I was a teenager. I would go to local stores and steal whatever I could. Then after the rush wore off, I would dispose of everything I had. I didn’t actually want or need what I was stealing. I just liked the excitement it gave me. I got in trouble for it and my parents immediately sent me to therapy. After years of working on my mental health, I stopped stealing completely.

Then I saw a purse.

I was walking home from work when I saw an unattended purse on a table outside of a cafe. I could see the person’s phone and wallet just sitting there. I don’t know what came over me. I thought I was already past this part of my life. But I couldn’t help myself, I had to take it. I walked over to the table and pretended to drop something. When I was getting up, I deftly took the phone and walked away briskly. The owner of the purse came out of the cafe with her coffee and food and sat down, not realizing I just swiped one of her most important belongings.

God, I missed the rush.

I practically ran to the train station thinking I was going to get caught. I was buzzing with excitement the entire ride. When I got to my stop, I spotted a trash can. I walked over to throw the phone away but somehow I just couldn’t. For some reason, taking the phone wasn’t enough. I had to see what was inside it. I debated with myself for a bit before ultimately deciding to pocket the phone and go home.

You’d be surprised how easy it is to unlock a secured device. All I had to do was Google. After a bit of tweaking, I finally got it open.

The first stop was the album. I started from the very bottom. It contained what you would expect: selfies, food pictures, animals, and memes. Nothing too exciting. I scrolled up a bit and I saw pictures of a guy, probably her boyfriend. I scrolled up further and started noticing something. She had dozens of pictures of the same guy but no pictures of them together. I continued scrolling and saw she had candid photos of him outside buildings, out on the street, in bars, and whatnot. I started feeling uneasy. Scrolling even further, I saw pictures of him through what looked like the window of an apartment. The last picture was of him with another girl. It looked like it was pulled from his Instagram.

“What the fuck,” I said as if I would stop prying.

The next stop was the messages. I scrolled through and noticed nothing out of the ordinary. Then at the very top, I saw her texts with a guy named Jared. Or rather, her texts to Jared. She sent him walls of text, proclaiming her undying love one minute and then threatening to kill him the next. He never responded apart from one text saying, “Leave me alone, Meadow.”

To say that I was uneasy is a gross understatement. I was petrified. But my dumb curious ass decided to continue my exploration.

I checked Meadow’s call history. She called Jared two hundred and fifty-six times over the past three days. All calls were missed. Then I checked her email. She had dozens if not hundreds of emails sent to Jared saying more of the same; pledges of undying love and threats of violence. Checking her notes, I found: love spells, boyfriend manifestations (whatever that means), and the most disturbing grocery list of all time:

Knife

Duct Tape

ZipTies

Axe

Plastic Tubs

Hydrofluoric Acid

Not only that, but I found a long, all-caps rant about “Jenny” (Jared’s girlfriend I’m assuming) and how he was cheating on her with Jenny, how Jenny was in the way of their perfect love, etc. Just out of sheer curiosity, I checked her Spotify and her most played song is Keep Awake by 100 Monkeys. Lovely.

Suffice it to say, I was freaked the fuck out.

What freaked me out more was the sudden notification that popped up. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I heard it. With much trepidation, I shakily opened the notification. It was an email Meadow sent to herself. It read:

“I know you have my phone.”

x

[celestial-toys]

That I Would Be Good [2/5]

Mind Games

“Contrary to that thing, my monitor doesn’t need to be on in order for you to interact with me. No eye-strain or migraines required.”

You lean back in your chair, muttering as you turn to face him. “Just trading one kinda ‘strain’ for another if you ask me…”

He idly turns your mug over in his hands. “I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear that.”

Your brows raise and you cock your head up to look at him. “That’s… mature of you.”

His optic's focus doesn’t move from the mug in his hands. “…One of us has to be.”

- - - - - - -

In This Chapter

Moon walks in on you in a vulnerable state, Sun displays his concern over your health in his own strange way, and they both attempt to care for you as you chip away at your work.

Pairing: Sun x Moon x Reader

Word Count: 4,606

Contains: [AU - Real World | Sentient AI/Automatons | Personality Swap] [depiction and discussion of EDNOS (including mentions of weight gain + disordered eating and its slew of related thoughts and behaviors)] [invasion of privacy (both intentional and unintentional)] [more of Sun’s usual brand of tension and intimidating behavior]

A/Ns: This is a songfic. Lyrics and title are from ‘That I Would Be Good’ by Alanis Morissette.

This fic is part of my AU “[Not] Made by Design”, the full series can be found here.

Links to other parts of this fic: [Ch.1] [Ch.2 (you are here)] [Ch.3] [Ch.4] [Ch.5]

That I would be good even if I gained ten pounds.

You glare down at the bathroom scale in a brief moment of anticipation, and the illuminated digits that soon flash back at you make you regret stepping up here in the first place.

A critical little voice fills your head, speaking to you in a smug tone as you watch the scale’s display time-out and go blank.

“What else did you expect?”

You stand frozen in place, eyes darting over to your phone lying on the counter by the sink. The screen displays a document containing a substantial number of weigh-ins, body measurements, progress photos, and more. It’d gone unopened for a blissful few months before that damned voice urged you to open it again.

“You’d surely feel better if you got healthier,” it said.

“You’d be healthier if you lost some weight,” it said.

“You’ll thank yourself later,” it said.

“You’ll do it right this time,” it said.

“It’ll be worth it,” it said.

You’re familiar enough with this cycle to know not to fall for it’s words, but fuck do they sound good sometimes. They sound right. They manage to convince you that that’s really all there is to this nagging desire. They frame it around your health, they paint it in a pretty, harmless, positive light, and you eventually cast aside all better judgment and wade back into that familiar sea of lies.

You’re surprised it hasn’t drowned you yet.

You do the quick math in your head and frown at the confirmation that you’ve nearly gained back the same damn ten pounds that you’ve lost and gained more times than you’d like to count.

The logical part of your brain is pleading with you to listen to reason.

That your body feels safe here, and that there’s a reason for that.

That there’s a reason you keep bouncing back to this weight when you eat like a normal human instead of an obsessive, restrictive control-freak.

That every time you restrict and deny and starve yourself down toward your “goal weight” you’re only hurting yourself.

That once you inevitably give in to the human need for food, your body is only going to put on more fat-reserves to try and protect you.

That no matter how many times you listen to those lies, your efforts to be “healthy” will never do you any good as long as the focus is on your appearance.

That try as you might to hide it, you’re not living alone anymore. That eventually- sooner or later- your ever-observant house-mates are going to catch on to what you’re doing.

Apparently, “sooner or later” is actually right fucking now. As you stand in place, fully naked and perched on the bathroom scale lost in thought, the door swings open and you aren’t sure if it’s you or Moon that shouts first.

You jump in shock and immediately move to cover yourself, unable to get a coherent word in over Moon’s shouts of “SORRY—SORRY—DIDN’T REALIZE YOU WERE IN HERE—I AM SO SORRY!”

He twists his faceplate 180 degrees on its axis so damn fast that you’re afraid he’s damaged some internal components in his rush to prove that he isn’t looking at you. He rushes back out of the bathroom, swinging the door closed behind him, and you slump against the wall, cradling the bathrobe you’d instinctually ripped off its hook against your chest. As you try to calm your heart, you hear the muffled sound of Sun’s irritated voice growing louder as he presumably approaches the door to investigate the noise.

You hurriedly wrap yourself in the robe before any more unfortunate incidents can occur.

“What the hell are you shouting about?! Is everything okay?”

Moon’s voice is a lot quieter when he answers him. “...Yes—No—I… I mean…” Silence hangs in the air. “I don’t… know.”

“What does that mean? Are they okay or not? Yes or no?!”

“Everything… is fine, Sun. Everything’s fine.”

A pit of fear begins to grow in your stomach at Moon’s haunted tone.

Surely he didn’t have time to realize what you were doing amidst his rush to vacate the bathroom… right?

“Sure as shit didn’t sound fine! What happened?”

“I just… I accidentally walked in on them in the bathroom. We startled each other. That’s all.”

You can feel the tension through the door.

“You’ve always been an awful liar, Moon. Now tell me the truth.”

Your eyes cast across the scale on the floor, the unraveled measuring tape sprawled across the counter, and your phone, its screen still lit up, displaying your detailed list of measurements.

You’ve got to be fucking kidding.

He put it together that fast?

“…I don’t think the truth is mine to tell, Sun.”

A terribly uncomfortable silence falls between the two of them, and you can only assume that they’ve moved whatever remains of the conversation to their internal chat.

You weigh your limited options as you take a seat on the edge of the bathtub, cursing your past self for ever confiding in them about your history of disordered eating. Why’d you think that was a good idea?

You could try to play it off, make a big deal about getting walked-in on while naked and pray that they conveniently forget what else Moon saw.

Or, you could try convincing them that it's different this time. Use all the same tactics that the disorder uses on you.

Or, you could try being honest. You could try being open with someone about this for a change. You could try asking for some damn help.

A soft knock on the door takes you out of your thoughts. Moon’s strained voice follows it. “Star, uhm… whenever you’re decent, I think the three of us should talk.”

You hear a sudden sound-the reverberation of rubber on metal-and Sun grunts out a muffled “Fuckin’-stop it! Okay- okay- y’ don’t gotta hit me…” before his voice follows Moon’s. “We aren’t… mad, if… if you’re worried about that. We’re just concerned. And we want to talk. That’s all.”

You close your eyes, and feel the pang of a painfully empty stomach.

Your voice comes out colder than you expect it to.

“I’m decent. Just open the door.”

A few seconds pass where you wonder if they even heard you, but then the door handle twists and the last remaining barrier between them and your poorly hidden secret is removed.

Moon enters first, looking concerned, of course, but also… almost… guilty. Internally, you scoff. It’s not like it’s his fault that you’re like this.

His monitor pivots, sweeping across the room but not lingering for long on any one thing, apparently already having seen enough in the brief moment between first opening the bathroom door and then registering your unclothed presence in the room.

You didn’t expect his environmental processing speed to come back and bite you in the ass like this.

His focus eventually settles on the floor tiles as he shuffles into the small room far enough to leave space for Sun.

You wrap your arms around your middle as the solar bot steps into the room, uncharacteristically… distant.

Well. Emotionally, his distance is nothing new, but he’s got quite the penchant for invading personal space, particularly yours, so the way he lingers near the doorway doesn’t go unnoticed. You watch as he silently leans forward, monitor shifting away from you and over toward your phone on the counter. He bends down to get a better look, apparently not shy about confirming Moon’s assumptions regarding what you’d been doing in here. He lowers a pointed finger to the screen, back-scrolling through your records and lingering on a few… unflattering photos.

You grit your teeth and grow restless in the tense silence. The uncomfortable vulnerability that comes with his casual invasion of your privacy manifests itself in your defensive tone. “Either of you gonna say anything or am I supposed to just sit here quietly as Sun reads about exactly how fat I’ve gotten?”

Moon’s head tilts slightly toward you, brow furrowed, and Sun mirrors the expression as he puts your phone to sleep with a defiant huff. You suspect he could easily unlock it and continue his investigation if he so chose, given his penchant for surveillance. He seems to recognize though, or at least finally acknowledge the rudeness of it, pulling back and righting himself, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed. “I couldn’t care less about that. I just want to know what’s going on with you.”

Moon pulls in a breath he doesn’t need, trying a gentler approach. “I apologize for walking in on you. I promise I… didn’t see… much.” He pauses, considering his words carefully. “…I can… show you? What I saw? I’ve already censored it. Or, uhm… I can just fully delete it if you’d like me to.”

The reminder that he can recall exactly what he saw and relive it again as many times as he’d like isn’t something you want to think about right now.

Maybe if you fling yourself backwards into the bathtub, you’ll hit your head so hard that at least you’ll be able to forget that any of this ever happened.

Pushing aside the intrusive thought, you shake your head. “I… appreciate the offer, but honestly that’s not what I’m concerned about right now.” You huff. “Hell, I’ve seen the two of you stripped bare, inside and out. Maybe it doesn’t hurt to level the playing field… I don’t know.”

The expression on Moon’s face changes, looking like he’s about to speak, and you cut him off before you all can wade any deeper into that discussion. “I assume seeing me naked for all of two seconds isn’t exactly what you two are concerned about either.”

Moon nods in both agreement and understanding, presumably answering for the both of them, as usual.

Sun reaches out once again, pinching the loose length of measuring tape between two fingers and lifting it off of the counter. “You know, I was willing to believe you when you started turning down your usual dinner, saying that you wanted to opt for something healthier.” He runs the tape between his fingers, straightening it as he speaks. “I was willing to write it off as your usual, run-of-the-mill lack of self care when you conveniently started “forgetting” meals entirely.” He begins slowly wrapping the tape around itself and you watch as his hands make quick work of re-rolling the tape into a neat little coil. “I was even willing to encourage you when you suddenly started wanting to exercise more. Though I had to admit, you seemed to be pushing yourself too far, too soon.”

He places the rolled tape back down on the counter, gaze suddenly meeting yours. “How long were you going to try and make fools of us?”

Okay… he’s taken this more personally than you thought he would.

“I—I wasn’t trying to “make a fool” out of either of you. Is that what you think this is? Some fun little game of mine?”

Moon jumps in before the conversation can grow heated. “That’s… not what he meant—”

“The hell it wasn’t—”

“Drop the act, Sun!”

Moon’s unexpected outburst catches both of you off guard, but his voice doesn’t waver, monitor swinging over to stare his other half down. “I know you’re worried about them and I know you don’t know how to show it, but shoving your head up your ass and acting like everything they do is some personal slight against you is not the answer.”

For once, Sun actually looks a bit shocked.

His screen flickers, cycling through a few different expressions before blacking out altogether. He’s quiet for a long few moments, monitor angling down toward the floor.

“…Then what am I supposed to do.” His defeated question comes out more like a statement, his head picking back up just enough for the image of you to enter his field of view. “How am I supposed to fix this? How do I reason with this nonsensical part of you that thinks there’s something wrong with your body?”

You search for an answer, a simple shrug followed by “It’s not that easy, Sun.” apparently not enough to satisfy him.

He keeps talking as he slowly approaches you, brushing past Moon’s outstretched arm as the lunar bot fights with his outdated instincts to keep Sun away from you. “There isn’t anything wrong with your body. Never has been. Never will be.”

You guess that his words are meant to sound comforting, but something isn’t right. His tone is off, the approach is all wrong, and he isn’t even technically correct.

“You know what there is something wrong with, though?”

You humor him. “What?”

He’s within arm’s reach of you now, and he reaches out to tap you on the forehead.

Moon’s hand darts in and clamps around Sun’s wrist, losing his internal fight.

Sun ignores him entirely.

“Your brain. There’s something wrong inside your head and it’s gonna fucking kill you if you keep listening to it.”

Moon attempts to interject. “Sun, that’s enough—”

“Tell me how I can help you.” Sun cuts Moon off like he’s not even there, focus locked entirely on you. “How? How? I can’t work on you the way you can work on us! I can’t lay you down, open you up, and pull out all the broken pieces. There’s no antivirus program to run. No broken bits of code that I can repair. I can’t fix you with my own two hands, and these mind games are not my forte.”

He lets his legs fold, collapsing to his knees before you. You wince at the sound of metal hitting tile. “Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it. You know I will.” His voice grows desperate, “Please, please tell me that you know I will.”

You shake yourself out of the near trance you’d fallen into while watching him show you his own peculiar brand of honesty.

“Sun…” You reach for the hand that Moon isn’t holding back. “I do know that you would. I do. I just don’t know how else I can explain to you that this… isn’t something that can be fixed in such a way. Hardly anything on my laundry list of problems can be cured using your preferred methods. I… I’m sorry.”

Sun sinks the rest of the way to the floor, slumping against the sink’s cabinets. With his black screen and lifeless body, he’d seem dead if it weren’t for the voice still coming out of him. “…Moon?”

Sun’s better half answers him as Moon lowers himself to the ground beside him. “Yes…?”

“Could I bother you to talk some sense into the both of us?” Sun breathes out his request, and you’re only a little offended by his use of “us.”

In spite of it all, Moon laughs. A soft, gentle sound.

“I can try.”

That I would be fine even if I went bankrupt.

The door to your office swings open slow and quietly, and if it hadn’t been for your eyes picking up on the movement in your periphery, you’d’ve been none the wiser to Sun’s silent entry. You don’t even need to glance away from your monitor’s screen to confirm which of your boys it is, Sun’s habit of “forgetting” to knock is plenty of a giveaway.

“It’s been an hour.”

Your eyes close as you suck in a deep breath, releasing it with more force than necessary as you will yourself to remain civil about this. “Thanks for the reminder, Sun.”

Your dismissive thanks is far from enough to appease him.

“Which means… it’s time to take a break.”

You reopen your eyes, avoidantly locking your focus on the work spread across your screen. “And I’ve scarcely made any progress yet. I can’t afford to take a break right now.”

He’s quiet for a few moments, and you almost dare to think that was a good enough counterpoint to convince him to leave you alone.

Almost.

He moves wordlessly from his imposing stance in the middle of the small room, and you watch him in the edge of your vision. He approaches the opposite side of your desk in measured steps before dropping down out of sight. There’s no sound or indication of movement for an uncomfortable few seconds too long. You’re about to angrily push away from your desk to look beneath it, mind quickly flooding with any number of nefarious things he could be doing. Namely, unplugging your PC again like the nuisance that he is.

As the palms of your hands press into the edge of your desk in preparation to push yourself away, your attention is caught by movement at the top of your monitor. You watch with impatient confusion as Sun’s rays peek above the top of your screen, the curve of his faceplate rising into view akin to the sun over the earth’s horizon. His motion halts when he’s risen halfway, and you’re rendered speechless in a mixture of annoyance, amusement, and shock as a pair of hyper-realistic human eyes stare back at you.

“Can you ‘afford’ to damage your eyesight?”

He’s replaced his display’s usual simplistic, circular approximation of eyes with an uncanny digital replica of what seems to be yours. You can hardly focus on the point he’s trying to make given the odd sight before you. “I—Sun, now really isn’t…”

He blinks at you, unwavering.

“Sun—quit lookin’ at me like that!”

He stifles a brief laugh. “Take a break from your screen and I will.”

You huff, shaking your head as you tear your gaze away from both screens in front of you, gaze pointedly darting around the room. “And look at what instead? You? What good’s it gonna do for me to look at your screen instead of this one?”

True to his word, once your eyes are off the screen, he rids himself of his disturbing new look. You glance at the motion as he rises fully from behind your desk, and take note of the way his monitor goes black instead of defaulting to his original face. He rounds the desk, hooking a finger through the handle of your long-empty mug and planting his ass on the corner where said mug just sat.

“Contrary to that thing, my monitor doesn’t need to be on in order for you to interact with me. No eye-strain or migraines required.”

You lean back in your chair, muttering as you turn to face him. “Just trading one kinda ‘strain’ for another if you ask me…”

He idly turns your mug over in his hands. “I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear that.”

Your brows raise and you cock your head up to look at him. “That’s… mature of you.”

His optic's focus doesn’t move from the mug in his hands. “…One of us has to be.”

You sigh. “Sun, I appreciate your attempts to preserve my eye health, I do. But right now really isn't a good time…”

His monitor swivels on its axis, turning a near 180 to look at your monitor on the desk behind him. He surveys the day’s work: a messy assortment of various windows, tabs, and programs, recognizing that one client’s unreasonable list of requests among the disarray. From how long he spends staring at it, you begin to wonder if he’s got anything else to say at all.

“…You ever think about quitting?”

A surprised laugh escapes you. “Quitting? Uh—aha—I mean…” You give your answer a bit of thought. “…Of course I think about it. Especially when I’m stuck with a project like this one. Or, well… a client like this one. But that’s not… practical. I can’t just walk away from a job when things get hard.”

His monitor reverses the path it took to face the screen, swinging around slowly and pausing halfway through the motion to face you. “What’s stopping you?”

Another breathy laugh leaves you. “You mean aside from not wanting to feel like an even bigger failure than I already constantly do?”

He doesn’t respond, and you barely give him any time to. “Aside from that, y’know… when I said I can’t ‘afford’ to take a break right now, I meant it in the financial sense as much as any other.”

It’s not like losing out on the profit from one project would hurt your finances too much, at least not in comparison to how badly the failure to deliver would affect your reputation in your field. But quitting altogether? That’d be a different story.

“You… have money.”

You resist the urge to roll your eyes, reminding yourself that in spite of his intelligence, some knowledge can only sink in when you experience it firsthand.

“Yeah, but I won’t continue to have it if I just up and abandon this job with nothing else to fall back on. I’ve got bills to pay, a house and car to upkeep. Mine and Zero’s food and water, you and Moon’s maintenance—these things aren't free.”

His monitor swivels away from you as he considers your words. “Well they should be.”

You bite back a smile at his indignant response. “You’re not wrong… and in a better world, they would be. But unless you guys have figured out how to universe-hop and just haven’t told me yet, we’re stuck in this one. And I’ll stick with this company as long as they’ll have me if it means we can keep living comfortably.”

He resumes his idle toying with your drinkware and the thought suddenly occurs to you that maybe you should look into gifting him a fidget toy of some sort. He and Moon both would likely benefit from one, though you suspect Sun will reject the notion and Moon will just end up with two. Not that they’d go unused regardless, the lunar busybody could likely work one in each hand and still find himself restless.

Perhaps you should look into something more involved, like… complex puzzles? Intricate crafts? Something to keep his hands busy, given his preference for physical tasks as opposed to Sun’s love of idle entertainment. For someone who hates so-called “mind games” the solar bot sure does spend a lot of time in his own head. Regardless, you ought to find something for Moon, because you don’t think your house can get much cleaner or more organized. Though, the solution to Sun’s penchant for micromanaging your behaviors will likely be more difficult than a simple fidget toy can solve…

As your mind gears up to run off with the ideas, Sun’s next abrupt question halts it in its tracks.

“Did you want to quit when you were working on us?”

You freeze for a moment as the vulnerability in his tone catches you off guard, but the truth comes out easy when you answer him. “No. …No, I never did.”

His head tilts just enough to angle halfway back toward you, and if he wore any expression at all you assume it’d be one of skepticism.

“I mean it, Sun. I mean— hell, talk to any of my colleagues and they’ll tell you how insufferable I was back then. How difficult it was to get me to focus on any other project. How hellbent I was on executing the vision. How… well, I guess you saw at least some of those fights there toward the end when things got kinda… tense. No one could even get me to entertain the idea of giving up on you.”

The finger he’d been tracing in endless circles along the rim of your mug comes to a standstill. “…Why?”

You spin your chair around a bit, swiveling further into his avoidant line of sight, tilting your head and attempting to catch his invisible gaze. “Because I wasn’t doing it for money. You two were a labor of nothing but love.”

In the silence that follows, you hear his cooling system kick up a notch, and that’s the only sound that fills the room for a long moment. 

But like all moments, it eventually passed.

A soft knock on the doorframe pulls your attention away from the flustered automaton on your desk, and toward his counterpart standing in the open doorway of your office. One look at the tray effortlessly balanced in one of his hands answers the question of his arrival before you can even ask it.

“Am I interrupting anything?”

Sun unexpectedly answers before you can, and when your gaze flicks back over to him you’re surprised to find his default expression returned, and his demeanor completely shifted. “Nah, I was just reminding them of the importance of taking breaks to rest their eyes.”

He motions Moon over and the lunar bot accepts the invitation. “That is very important!” Soft-spoken and positive as ever, he presents you with a very reasonably proportioned and healthy spread of food. “You know what else is very important?”

You gaze up into his blue crescent eyes and he answers his own question on your behalf. “Lunch!”

Your grateful smile is involuntary as you reach out to lift a plate from the tray, turning toward Sun in a silent request for him to vacate the dedicated food-and-drink corner of your desk. He’s already moving before you even turn to him though, rising and striding to the middle of the room as you offer your gratitude to Moon and listen to him describe exactly what he’d made you.

You do your best to fight the long-memorized caloric numbers that rack up in your head as you take stock of what all he’s brought you.

“I’d offer to refill your water bottle, but it seems to still be quite full…” Moon’s commentary brings your attention back, and you sheepishly answer him.

“Yeah, I… finished the coffee first and… kinda forgot about that.”

He pets you gently on the head, calm as ever. “It’s alright, starlight, I understand.”

As you guiltily reach for the water bottle, Sun pipes up, excusing himself. “Well, now that you’ve been sufficiently distracted, I’ll be taking my leave—”

Moon cuts in, “Oh, don’t let me run you off, I just wanted to bring this in.”

Sun begins walking effortlessly backwards toward the doorway. “Oh, you’re not. I’ve got… my own plans. Starting with washing this mug.”

You can’t resist the urge to tease him, ‘talking to yourself’ plenty loud enough for him to hear on his way out. “Oh, thank fuck, he’s gone. Now I can get back to work!”

He halts in his tracks halfway through turning to face the exit. “You know, on second thought—”

You grin and wave. “Goodbye, Sun! Thanks for washing that for me!”

He shifts his weight onto one leg, idling in the doorway and thoughtfully dangling your mug from one hooked finger. “I mean, The American Academy of Ophthalmology actually recommends—”

“Good-bye, Mr. Sun.”

Moon chuckles at your deadpan dismissal and Sun huffs, turning and trudging away down the hall.

As you sip your water and begin to poke at the lunch with your fork, Moon walks around behind you and leans forward, surveying the work spread across your screen. “Do you mind if I take a look over this while you eat?”

You know it’s probably mostly an excuse to stay in here and make sure that you do eat, but you nod anyway. “Uh, sure! Have at it.”

The hunger hits you once you’ve had a taste of Moon’s cooking, and you muse aloud, mumbling around a mouthful of food. “Hell, maybe you’ll find some workaround that I can’t.”

A/N: Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed. I’ll be back soon with part 3! You can also find my notes and commentary on this fic right here on Ao3. Links to the playlist and moodboard for [N]MbD can be found on this blog’s pinned post, as well as in the series notes on Ao3. Image Sources: x - x - x

[yanderemeganekko]

I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm so scared for my health, I feel like there's no hope sometimes.

My reflux has been getting worse. Eating small meals every 3-4 hours isn't enough, leaving out all the irritating foods isn't enough, the medicine and all the little changes and everything, feels like it does nothing. I still wake up to the burning at night, I feel nauseous from both eating and not eating. There's no comfort, and there's no help.

Speaking of the burning at night, consistent sleep has become a luxury. At some point last week I started waking up at night, and it's getting worse every night. It takes me an hour or more to fall asleep, and I wake up every other hour to either pain or anxiety, and then I can't fall asleep again. I force myself to fall asleep through the stress and discomfort, and manage to sleep enough hours, but I can tell the quality of rest is worse.

I'm also getting constant hot flashes and muscle spasms, and have trouble getting deep full breaths sometimes. I occasionally feel light-headed and my blood pressure has been a bit low (100/68 on average or so), which is scary as fuck because I have no idea why. Sure, I could chalk up the hot flashes and spasms to stress, but I can't explain the low blood pressure. Isn't stress supposed to raise your blood pressure?

I wish I had an explanation for anything that's happening with my body. I originally thought the hot flashes were just the diabetes lowering my heat tolerance, but I get them constantly even with the weather cooling down.

And the blood pressure and shortness of breath? What if I have a problem with my heart? I'm hypochondriac and one of the things my anxiety fixates on is the thought of developing a heart-related hypofunction. It's irrational, especially given my EKG results have always been good, and any chest pains can be explained away by the reflux. But I've never had anything but a short EKG done, so there's nothing to relieve the anxiety.

Of course all of this could be done away with if the healthcare system wasn't fighting me to death. The doctors I've dealt with have been nice but obviously overworked, and constantly 'reassure' me that I probably don't have any severe conditions on the account of my age and gender.

And the nurses that take the calls at the call center are a nightmare. I just burst into tears mid-call with one because I asked if, in addition to having a gastroscopy scheduled (which she seemed apprehensive about already), I could meet up with a doctor to discuss my other symptoms, but she dismissed it and said, near verbatim, that "well, you just need to find your own method of dealing with the stress that's causing them". I had no idea how to continue, so I just tried to stifle my sobs and told her thank you and goodbye, and hung up. What the hell was I even supposed to say?

I have no idea what to do. I could probably afford a quick check-up with a private doctor, but there's no way I can afford the expensive follow-up tests or examinations they might assign.

I don't even have anyone I can meaningfully talk to or receive comfort. My partner and most good friends live an ocean away, my dad is emotionally constipated and prone to freaking out, and my roommate might just hate me. All I can think lately is how I just want to see my partner again.

I think about my mom a lot, how I'd feel so much better just talking to her. How much I just wanna see her again even once. How I watched her slowly die in pain and misery. How I keep getting diagnosed with all the same problems, how long do I have to live, how little do I have to live, if I get to ever see my partner again, much less have a life with him. I just want to see him. I just want to live.

I'm just so scared and feel so alone. I just want something, anything good to happen. I can't take this anymore. Please.

[cascadianights]

The world has been monotone for so long

Disappearing into darker and darker shades of grey

My health fails, so my finances fail, so my mental health fails as I remember on repeat that someone who cannot contribute - someone who can't take care of themself and work 40 hours a week - has no place here

Slob. White trash. Scum.

My entire adulthood has been a cycle of effort and failure, stuck on repeat. I go to school and I'm forced to drop out. I go to jobs and I stay until I'm lying in bed with pneumonia (again) or spending the entire day (for the second time that week) on the brink of consciousness, and I have to quit. I try to keep up with self care, and before I know it it's been a week since I brushed my teeth and two since I took a shower.

Filthy. Trash. Worthless.

I don't tell anyone how bad things are because I don't even know where to begin. The dilapidated trailer I don't have the money to work on, where I didn't even have running water for over half a year or a roof that didn't leak for over twice that time. The debts and bills - emails and mail from debtors, a car we defaulted on ages ago, the SAVE program a federal court just halted that means my student loans were put into forbearance. The property I live on, with housemates I trusted completely and have come to find over half a dozen rape accusations about while they scream at me or the kids at the drop of a hat and demand more and more and that we be smaller and smaller. The fact that I haven't had cell service in years, and the way that sits in my throat when I drive home at night and get stuck in traffic on the interstate and watch the miles of gas count down and down and down with less than $10 in my bank account and over 20 miles to home. The fact that the only place I have enough wifi to use my hand me down laptop (locked out of admin privileges on) or make phone calls or have counseling appointments is a spot under a tree outside where I've had to cancel therapy for the past month because my housemate is just there there there. The fear, the overwhelming all encompassing fear that touches everything - what do you do if your car breaks down in a food desert 25 miles from the nearest town? What do you do if you're stranded somewhere with no phone or money? What if you're in a wreck? What if you see your friends and they ask about the dream job you had to quit after getting so fucking ill so fucking fast again? What if your partner never gets better either and is dying of the same degenerative wasting thing that killed his father? What if you never get better? What if there's nothing but this deep weighing pain and exhaustion and the growing growing greys

Loser. Freak. Retard fag cripple waste of space who doesn't care about anyone but themself

What if there's nothing for you

No place for you in this world

What if you're nothing more than a burden, a problem to be solved or walked away from, a parasite

What if you're nothing

What if you will always

Be

Nothing

[darknightsandfairylights]

I don't know why shouting into the void of the internet helps, but sometimes it's an invaluable tool on this journey. So today, I shout.

TRIGGER WARNING: Talk of unhealthy dieting, body dysmorphia and body image issues

I'm in a weird spot, mentally, with health and fitness. I grew up very out of place. I come from stocky people, but was adopted into a family of fast metabolism. I never quite fit in. Combined with other issues (poor socialization, small private school, general awkwardness), I never had many friends or social interaction in general, which I chalked up to not being pretty or popular enough. In high school, I joined Weight Watchers, starved myself, but didn't work out at all, and so I ended up much thinner but VERY unhealthy. And with basically no muscle mass. I stayed roughly in that (bad) weight range for about 3 years - until college. I had semi-helicopter parents, so I never really learned how to regulate my own eating, and I also went through a horribly abusive relationship that triggered depression and massive anxiety my last year of high school and the summer into freshman college. So, left to my own devices, I gained the freshman 15. Then 20. Then 30. Then second semester, I met someone with disposable income, and suddenly I was eating Domino's multiple times a week, and other takeout besides. 30 extra pounds grew into 50, then 80 by the end of college, then a new trauma / depression spiral the first 2 years out of college bumped the number up to 120 extra pounds. Almost as much as I weighed to start. And the whole time was horrible yo-yo dieting, juice fasts, several stints in Weight Watchers, a ton of fad diet books, and emotionally bullying myself, horribly.

So now we come to the latest "era" of my life. The era of childhood healing, true self care, and hard fucking truths. It took a lot of work, and I doubt I'll ever be completely "done", but I've done quite a lot to lessen the voices telling me fat = bad. I no longer consider fat to be a moral failing. It's not something to be celebrated either - it just is. It's morally neutral. It is an emotionless fact about me, much like the color of my hair. Brunette isn't bad, blonde isn't shameful, it's just... hair.

With that said, being morally neutral like hair, I believe it's objectively OK to want to make a change. If I want to dye my hair a slightly darker shade, no one will really care. If I want to go red, or purple, or oil slick hair, no one's gonna care. (I mean. With some bright colors / multicolor shenanigans, there are some angry people that might take personal offense, but these aren't people whose opinions I value.) Wanting to change my weight and physical health should be so morally neutral. The answer to both is "do what makes you feel good." Purple hair makes you happy? Dye it. Growing muscle makes you happy? Hit the gym.

Because of my history though, I freak out about eating anything I see as a "health food" (we aren't even talking dieting, because I never want to see a fad diet again. I just mean like... eating a side salad with dinner) because I don't trust myself. What if a salad turns into a slippery slope and suddenly I'm an unhealthy skinny weight again? What if I go off the deep end and spend way too much time in the gym and drive away everyone I love? What then?

I know these fears are unfounded. There's a balancing act, finding that sweet spot. If I stay with morally neutral, and keep food morally neutral, so cake and pie hold the same moral value as fruits and veggies, I may find (if I allow myself) that I actually like eating a mostly veggie / fruit / bean diet ("diet" as in "things you eat" in this sentence - not as in "strict eating plan"), and I may find that I love the gym, and my metabolism is great, and weight just falls off. Or I may find I still want to eat a lot of pasta and potatoes and desserts, but I can add on enough fruits and veggies, and go to the gym enough, that I slowly get to a healthier equilibrium. But I have to stop being so afraid of the journey to even let myself start.

I don't know whether this helps. You, or me. I'm still overwhelmed. And tired. I Aldo hate meal prep. If I had someone making me fresh acai bowls and salads and bean burgers, this would be easy. But alas.

[neeharlow]

This isn't a thing asking for money, I just need to vent about a few recent events. The first thing, my husband and I are struggling. He had a good paying job, about 6k a month. But this job was soul sucking and stressful for him. Now, if he had the correct amount of support staff it wouldn't be nearly as bad. Because he had worked from being a regular security guard to an account manager he knows the hardship that the guards go through. He knows they are paid like shit. He would often have to ask people to work over time. But that's the thing. He would ask. Not once did he ever try to force someone to work overtime. He himself would fill in the position if no one was willing to work. So he'd often have to go to work on Saturdays or Sundays which happened to be over an hour away and that's not with Los Angeles/Inland Empire traffic. His officers were often times very fucking childish and would argue or complain about the work they had to do. Which he understood, totally not paid enough to dal with that level of shit. But it's still the job. Do the freaking job. Anyway, the company lost the account so he lost the position. (Oh and once everyone found out they were losing their jobs they turned on him and started telling lies about him to HR which he thankfully was able to prove were all false.) Now he's back to being a normal guard. And he's honestly a lot happier with his post. Nights. Walking back and forth in a truck yard. He gets to listen stuff on his phone and even better he doesn't have to deal with people. The only problem is he went from making 6k a month to 2k. Which I know is more than a pot of people make. And he is very thankful he even has the job. But after car payments, rent, groceries, insurance... we're in the negative. I get 1300 a month from disability (aka why after 18 years together we aren't married). My account is for rent. Thank god we live with his parents so we're not at risk of losing the roof over our heads.. mostly. His dad is a powder keg sometimes and has been emotionally abusive to him and his brothers so he avoids him like the plague. We have 22k in debt due to stupid stupid choices on both our parts. (in the past he got addicted to Star Wars Galaxy of Heros and ended up racking up 25k worth of mobile microtransactions. We have since gotten out of that debt. My vice is fast food delivery.)

He is willing to take on another job until we get out of debt. But that will not end well. I refuse to let him work all day, sleep for three hours and then work all night. It's not healthy. He has BPD and ADHD so it's a real emotional struggle to just keep up with this job. He already lost his health insurance so he's also unmedicated. With my health issues (dead kidneys, failing liver, Bipolar, ADHD, and heart issues.) I cannot get a job even if I wanted one. No employer in this day and age would let me have two days a week for dialysis not to mention all the medical appointments I have to go to. Plus I'm on the transplant list for liver and kidney, if I get that call that's automatically at least a year off of said work.

I know there are people worse off than us. I'm not dumb enough to think our problems are world ending. We are safe. We have a roof over our heads. That's more than a lot of people have. And we will come out of this eventually. His parents are also struggling so we can't really rely on them for anything. I'm just worried about him.

I'll make a different post for the other thing. :/

[floral-hex]

This is a drug post, but, like, a prescription drug post, so… there’s your fair warning:

God bless Klonopin. But also fuck it bc I know it can be addictive and fuck people’s lives up. It doesn’t mess me up, though. I don’t get high, it just kinda stops the bulk of my anxiety and let’s me feel okay. I can get this stuff from a pharmacy, completely covered by my insurance, but I can’t do the same for weed, and believe me… I would suck 1000 dicks for someone to smoke me out now. Actually, I’d probably suck a dick just to feel some human touch and affection. My anxiety is so bad. I can’t over exaggerates it. Constant chills, nausea, cold sweats, racing mind and heart. CONSTANTLY. Every time I think about my hearing loss, I freak out, and let me tell you, right now, 90% of my thoughts are on hearing loss.

So, yes, thank the pharmaceutical gods for klonopin. If only I didn’t have to ration them. I get one .5 pill a day and it’s not really enough. Gotta be strategic. Woke up and laid anxiously in bed for hours before I finally caved into taking one. I have another appointment in a few weeks and I know I’ll have a few extra pills, but the hoarder in me has no idea when I should double up, if doubling up one day would lessen the effects of a single pill the next day, and I have no guarantee I can get refills (probably not, but the nurse was super sweet so there’s a teeny chance). I don’t really want to keep fucking with a drug that can mess me up like benzos, so I’ll probably look into something SOMETHING to help supplement the antidepressants I’ve started. At this point I’d rather be a dulled zombie than have to keep dealing with this panic. I’d rather feel like I’m just going through the motions than feeling this paralyzing panic because at least there’d be motion (ok I tried to be clever but I don’t think it worked. Forgive me, my brain is fried.)

That’s why I wish I could get stoned. Just want to relax and zone out. Plus my appetite has been bad. Most food tastes bland or gross right now. I made a bunch of chicken and rice as meal prep since that’s one of the only things I actually like right now. If the scale is to believed, I’ve lost about 6 pounds in the last week or so. THAT’S NOT GOOD DON’T ENVY THAT PLEASE. It was probably all muscle and good stuff and I feel so weak and out of control of my body.

Bleggghhh. Just gonna get on Grindr and start offering favors for weed. Not really, but… I’m a mess. Sorry, that’s a crass joke. I’m falling apart. It’s not pretty. It’s tiring. I feel sick. Trapped. Ugggghhhh and and and HEALTH put out a new song and I can’t even really listen to it! I mean, I can hear the broad strokes, but the minutae gets washed away in the noise, and I love noise! Noise betrayed me! I’ll never get to really enjoy new music again! Aaaaah! I have to be positive! I have to stay positive!

[joytraveler]

37: SUPER BOXING

Exactly what it says: it's boxing, and seems to be super. Instead of an over-the- shoulder view like in Mike Tyson's Punch-Out, this game gives you two boxers side by side, and your main playable character has a huge, impressive Afro. Round one, touch gloves and come out fighting!

"This man.. who IS this wondrous man with an entire sheep for hair! He's awesome but the whole audience behind him can't see anything." Bea throws a few punches. "And it controls weird!! And I can't configure it of course but the directional pad is to block in different ways, you have two punches and use the other primary buttons to move."

ButterflyDefect: Just like real boxing! Knock em out the box, bea

Eventually the controls become a bit clearer and Bea stops being battered back into the turnbuckles. She even gets the opponent with a good shot in the mouth, making pixelated blood drip down his chin!

"Oh. Ow. Okay I'll just pummel your stomach for a while. You really can't give ANY leeway or you'll get hit, and of course it just throws you in like this because why not!"

"This needs cheats. And by cheats I mean foot stomping and groin clobbering"

The body blows help, but the opponent's muscular shape is getting more defined-- he's not getting stronger, though, he's got blood running down his six-pack now.

"You ain't even seen my Super Smashfro Sugar Punch yet!!"

ButterflyDefect: Jeez this game's.. kind of brutal SugaGlyda: yeah D: HNV: They really should test these boxers for hemophilia before they let them in the ring!

"Maybe bleeding a lot is just his gimmick, like how Great Tiger can teleport for some reason"

berd_snurglar: its not SOME REASON, it's secret technique passed down through hundreds of generations of stereotypes

At that moment, the opponent lets his guard down. Bea gets in a good body blow-- and her opponent's right pectoral muscle falls off, revealing white bones underneath.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUGH....uuuuGGGHHHHhhh....hhhh...hhhhhhhhhh...ffpptptt.. DOES THAT HAPPEN??"

SugaGlyda: Whoooakay i think i need to sit out this'n, sorry guys aroseahorseboy: jesus christ it's still sitting on the floor!

"Can't I just kick it away? Just a little nudge"

HNV: Even Mortal Kombat never had you break your opponents up like a freaking chocolate bar! Llord_Kuruku: what a fucking gross out... hide this game from your kids, they'll love it

The opponent keeps coming after Bea despite his grievous injury; her next counterpunch knocks his bicep off and it lands next to the pec, forming a growing pile.

Syrupentine: ...wait, I just realized there's no health meter in this game...

"No, no there isn't, you're just literally expected to punch your opponent into chunks" Klickitat_Street: Super Dog Food Boxing.

"Which raises the chunk-o-meter, which it how you win!" she tries to punch the opponents arm, seeing if she can get some of that muscle off

Baconnaise: Riki-Fro

That's a good hit, it doesn't just knock off the muscle but his whole lower arm! Now he can only punch with one hand and a stub!

HNV: Monty Python's Black Knight Boxing.

"There now they can call you... Stub Joe. Gabby Bonesplinter. Dead Steve. Chunks McGullicutty."

ButterflyDefect: Meat..... Bob. Bee52: We got a winner!

[reflectionsofgalaxies]

.

[jeoniius]

Next Life | kth (m)

☆ summary:  Although you and Taehyung didn’t believe in first and second lives, you both wished you’d find each other in the next life as you both looked at the sky that night.

☆ pairing: husband!tae x wife!reader

☆ genre: angst, smut.

☆ warning: sexual content, angst

☆ word count: 4k

☆a/n: Finally this is done. Thank you so much @jkiddingjeon for beta-ing the fic, it meant A LOT. I really love this fic and I hope you enjoy it too. ngl it's a pretty heartbreaking fic so get ready for some ANGST.

Love. Hate. 

It’s always adjacent to each other. Something that’s always there when the other is present. It also changes people. How it makes people go from loving someone and being best friends with someone to trying everything they can to pull them down, to take them out. 

You’d say you can relate to it. In more ways than one. You had seen your fair share of people going from loving them unconditionally to talking shit about them the next day. Divorce was one of them. All the promises and vows made of staying through health and sickness, through good and bad, thrown out of the window. 

You thought of it as one of the most heartbreaking things and now you were here. Doing the exact thing as you watched the clock tick by, thinking of ways and excuses to get you out of this marriage. This marriage that ended everything. It hadn’t always been like this. No, you were in love. You were so madly in love that if anyone had told you you’d stand in this place today you’d not believe it. 

You are still in love. So madly in love but the difference being you want it to end. Maybe that way you’d find each other again.

As time went by, you stood by the railing of your balcony. The bright light of the city shined underneath you as you thought Tomorrow would be it. The end of what once was seen as a beautiful love story by not only you but by many others. The final chapter.

Maybe love and hate stood adjacent to each other but you could never hate him. 

And so you stood there, taking it all in, you thought about where it went wrong.

7 months ago

“I can’t believe you think that!” you shouted, hands up in the air as you walked back into the apartment, him following you behind. 

“Well I wouldn’t if you kept your distance!” he said, raising his voice.

“Oh my god. One hug. It was one hug. And that too because he was leaving.” 

“It didn’t look like one,” he argued back. 

“Are you freaking kidding me right now? Nothing happened, you know that.” you said trying to calm yourself down. 

“Stop trying to argue with me all the fucking time.” he bit back. 

“Oh, I am arguing? You were the one who started it.” You took long strides towards him. 

“You were the one who accused his wife of cheating although you have no proof whatsoever” you gritted through your teeth as your finger poked his chest. 

He let out a loud groan as you run your hands through your hair. “You know what, Taehyung? You can stay here. I’m leaving.” and with that you grabbed your purse and keys and strode out the door, slamming it behind. 

Kim Taehyung. 

The love of your life. You met him in college. As cliché as it sounds, he was the heartthrob with his extremely good looks and his unbelievable flirting skills. You weren’t supposed to know him at all if you thought about it. 

Your college held its annual fest, and you were the head of the management. You had stumbled across him when he had come to drop off some supplies instead of his best friend. You got into a small quarrel when he commented on how you were the head of the management when you were only a freshman and questioned your ability to pull the entire thing off when it was only three days from the fest and not even one percent of anything was done.

You got into a bet with him as you made him promise you that he’d treat you to something of your choice if you pulled it off. Nevertheless, you pulled the entire thing off within the next two days, proving him wrong. As a promise, he treated you to something really expensive(of course you had picked it) and then swore to never question your ability.  

You started seeing more of him, with his surprise visits to your class (which usually ended up with girls surrounding you asking how you knew him) or him coming to your seat in the cafeteria just to give you some new juice he got for you. Sometimes he’d ask you to come to one of his basketball matches and then took you to dinner afterward. 

You felt your heartbeat increasing every time you saw him or heard his name in fact, and before you knew it, you were confessing to him, putting your heart on the line. 

The day you confessed, you ran out before he could even reply. Too scared to be rejected. But Taehyung did something you’d never expect. He brought you to an amusement park, took you to dinner, and then confessed to you with thousands of chocolate (literally). 

You both had your fair share of arguments and then makeup sex. Mind-blowing sex to be exact. 

Your relationship with Taehyung was built on trust. He’d be there waiting for you every time you came home late and vice versa. You’d be at all of his games. You’d go to every party, hang out with your friends.

Once he graduated, he’d wait to pick you up every day. Every day you’d go to your favorite café, with your friends, complete assignments and projects, argue about who won the last UNO game, girls vs boys. 

He spent every hour with you when you struggled with your dream job and you did the same. When you finally did get the job, he asked you to marry him. You nodded then and there. Tears escaped, phone calls were made. Everyone came to the engagement party and then the wedding and you truly thought everything you ever wanted was there. Your family, your friends, his friends, him. 

But what you didn’t know then was what followed after. Just like promises are made, they are broken. Trust is broken and the bond doesn’t stay. 

The first two years were bliss. You went to Paris for your honeymoon and then to New York. Yes, New York for your honeymoon. You experienced the love in Paris and the rush in New York. 

You spent most of the days in Paris, going to spots of attractions, enjoying the food in the café, walking around the streets drunk and completely in love, having late night sex, morning sex,  just lots of sex to be exact. 

But in New York, you spent your days going to Times Square, Bars, and Pubs had ‘the’ New York pizza and cheesecakes and hotdogs and whatnot. Went shopping and sightseeing. Roamed around the streets at night, met so many people.

You believed you had found what you had been looking for all your life. Someone to go to romantic dinners and the craziest parties with.  

But what followed was something you didn’t think would happen. Every marriage has its ups and downs. You had to. But then it started.

Every party would become an excuse to start arguments, every late night at work would lead to assumptions. At first, you thought it would be fine. Talking would help, it was always the key for the both of you but lately, every time you spoke or tried to solve the issues, it would end in huge fights, sometimes followed by sex, or even if not sex, you’d stop talking to each other and then one day pretend nothing happened. 

Although in heels you walked around the park near your apartment. ‘It will be fine’ you told yourself as you tried not to break down. Deciding it would not be a good idea to go anywhere at that hour, you sat by a bench.

The cold wind hit you as a shiver ran down your body, the thin wine slip dress doing nothing to stop it. The screen of your phone lit up as you saw multiple texts from Taehyung. A part of you was happy that he cared enough to text you. You clicked on his profile as a series of texts came up.

Tae: where are you?

Tae: come on Y/N, don’t be stupid. 

Tae: it’s really late. where the fuck are you?

Tae: baby, you’re scaring me. 

Sighing you got up and made your way out of the park. Since you lived in a complex, it didn’t take you too long to walk. As you opened the keys, you saw Taehyung pacing around the living room. “Where are my keys?” he muttered to himself, not noticing your presence. 

A clinking sound made Taehyung look up as the keys hit the ceramic bowl on the kitchen top. “Where were you?” he asked, trying to control his anger. You didn’t answer him as you took off the heels, internally sighing when the cold floor hit your barefoot. “Are you seriously gonna ignore me? I asked where the fuck were you?” he pulled you by your wrists stopping you from going further. “Don’t do this.” you gritted through your teeth as you harshly pulled away before going inside your shared bedroom. 

You slipped out of the dress and you got inside the shower, the hot water touching your skin as you stood there. No matter how much you tried not to think about it, you always went back. Where did it go wrong? 

You changed into shorts and one of Taehyung’s oversized shirts as it reached mid-thigh. Getting inside the covers, you relaxed, the cool sensation of your bedsheet and covers calming you somehow as you turned towards the glass wall. 

You heard a sigh as Taehyung got inside the room. He got inside the covers and stared at your back as you tried to keep calm. You felt an arm wrap around your waist as he pulled you closer, back colliding with his chest, nuzzling his face at the crook of your neck. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.” his voice came muffled as you felt the vibrations on your neck. 

“I really am.” he said, taking a deep breath pulling you closer if that was possible. You sighed, turning to him. 

“I felt really cheap, you know” you said, hands reaching to cup his face. “I’m so sorry baby.” he sighed, closing his eyes as you ran your hand through his hair. “I know.” 

He pressed a kiss on your lips as you pulled him closer, hands wrapping around his neck. You sighed into the kiss as his lips trailed down towards your collarbone, sucking and nipping then. Soon enough he was inside you as he went on an animalistic pace. “Do you think he can fuck you like this?” he growled. You ignored him as you knew you were close, focusing on your climax. You came within the next few minutes as he rubbed your clit while thrusting.

Later on, he lapped up the spilled contents lazily as you screamed his name, your cries stroking his ego.

He wrapped an arm around your naked waist as he fell asleep on his stomach, head on your chest, legs tangled over your naked ones. You stroked his hair as you stared at the ceiling, his words ringing in your ear ‘Do you think he can fuck you like this?’

A small realization crept inside your head. He was never gonna trust you.

He stirred in his sleep, pulling you closer, he pressed an open-mouth kiss above the swell of your breast in his sleep. Releasing a long sigh, you kissed his head, quickly pushing the thought aside. 

That was the first mistake. 

“I love you so much,” you said. 

You pulled the robe over your body tightly, a coffee cup in your hand. Picking up your phone you looked at the time. 3:08 am it read. The city still buzzed with life. The cold breeze hit your face soothingly as you closed your eyes. Only if you had done something before, things wouldn’t have gone wrong. 

4 months ago

Your phone buzzed as you frustratedly rubbed your face. You dreaded picking up the call, not wanting to have to shout again. Things had been gradually worsening between you and Taehyung. Late-night fights, coming home drunk, not talking to each other for weeks had become a common thing nowadays and no matter how hard you tried, no matter how many times you both tried to co-operate, you didn’t seem to escape it.

“You should talk to him.” Ae-ra said, handing you a cup of tea. 

Tea. 

You never liked tea. You were more of a coffee person. You preferred the rush, the adrenaline. But nowadays, you were tired. Tired of doing the same thing over and over again. Having the same quarrels and fights over and over again. Tea seemed to calm you. 

“And then what? Get into another fight?” 

“You know what I mean, babe.” She said as she rubbed your arm soothingly.

“Maybe later. I cannot deal with him now.” you sipped on the cup.

What you didn’t know was that “later” would come that fast. You went back to your apartment to get more of your clothes. You planned on going at night, when he was most probably out with his friends or whoever kept him busy nowadays. But to your surprise, he was there. 

You opened the main door, using the key you had with you to meet with his laying figure on the couch. His head shot up at the sound of the door, eyes meeting each other. He looked drained, hair messy and bags under his eyes. You cursed under your breath, debating if you should just go back to Ae-ra’s place and come later for your clothes. 

“Look who’s here.” he scoffed as he got up from the couch.

Deciding on the former, you walked past him without taking another glance, into your shared bedroom. Taking a bag out, you shoved as many clothes as possible wanting to stay away from this mess. “Are you gonna ignore me now?” you heard him as he entered the room. 

You zipped up the chain as you walked towards the door wanting to leave. He grabbed your hand before you could go any further. He felt so scared when he saw you packing your stuff, so much that it suffocated him. “Fucking answer me.” his voice raised as he stared at you. 

Taehyung’s eyes softened as he saw the dry tears on your cheeks and he wanted nothing more than to pull you close and never let go. To talk to you and tell you it would be fine, that you would figure it out together. 

As he saw your tired eyes, glossy as you tried to keep your composure, he wanted to kiss you so badly and keep you tucked away from every bad thing; ever, even himself if he was bad for you.

And maybe he would have done that. Hugged you and kissed you. Kept you in his arms if you didn’t start talking. 

“Leave me the fuck alone.” you pulled away harshly. “You know what? Yes, I am ignoring you and gladly will.” 

“What is wrong with you? You cannot just come and go like that.” he said, hands gesturing to your bag.

“I can and I will. You cannot stop me” you clarified.

“ Yes, I can. I am your husband for god’s sake.” a frustrated tone laced his words.

“Husband?” you scoffed. “When were you a good husband? Where did this go when I stayed up till dawn every day waiting for you?” 

“You know how hectic things have been at work.” he looked at you knowingly. 

“That doesn’t mean you’d stop spending time with me!” you yelled.

You knew you were being unreasonable. Things really were hectic at work for him. But you couldn’t help but feel lonely when you came home after a long day to an empty and cold apartment and then stayed up every day almost all night for your husband. You felt so neglected when he’d come home and go to sleep straight away without saying anything. 

All the doubts about your marriage slowly were coming true and you wanted nothing more than to prove it wrong. But talking about it led to arguments with Taehyung. So you decided to stay away from home, so that you didn’t have to think about it, to begin with. 

That was the second mistake. 

“You are going nowhere.” Taehyung took the bag from your hand and walked towards the bed. “You’ll stay at home.”

“Home?” a humorless chuckle left your throat. “I will go anywhere I want, but home.” 

“I mean it Y/N. Stop acting like a kid. Go wash up and come to bed.” he sighed. 

“I’m not staying” you concluded, ready to leave your stuff behind as you turned. 

You felt a pair of hands wrap around your waist as he stuffed his face in the junction of your neck and shoulder. A tear left your eyes, followed by streams, and for some reason, your heart broke, it felt like he was pulling you apart from inside. 

You felt his warm breath as he mumbled something. He pressed you towards him as you silently cried. 

Later that night, as he fucked you slowly, something different than his usual dominating aura, your heart ached, but you couldn’t pinpoint why. He kissed you ever so passionately, that you cried. 

Something told you that it would be over soon, so you hugged him as close as you could when he slept. You cried as he hugged you in his sleep like you would go away if he didn’t have you in his arms. 

“I love you so much,” he mumbled in his sleep.

That’s when you realized how bad the entire situation was. How bad you were for him just like he was for you. How bad this marriage was. 

And what followed after confirmed everything you ever doubted. 

2 months ago

“You think I didn’t see you?” you yelled. 

“What are you talking about?” he looked curious. 

“Oh sure, play the good guy, make me look bad, why don’t you?” you scoffed.

“I have no idea what you are talking about.” he repeated. “How would you? You thought you were good enough to keep it away from me.” you said. His eyebrows crashed as he tried to understand. “I saw you with her. Maybe that’s why you were always late. You were too busy fucking her.” a bitterness stayed in your mouth. “Are you kidding me?” he said as he raked his fingers through his hair. 

“You are accusing me of cheating, Y/N? You?” he scoffed. “Don’t think I forgot about the party.” 

“Oh my god. You were never going to believe me, were you?” you looked at him with a glint in your eyes. 

“You are being paranoid Y/N,” he said calmly. 

“You know what? Maybe I will go to him. The guy you accused me of cheating. Maybe I will let him fuck me. Clear all your doubts and make it true!” you were screaming now. 

“I can’t do this anymore,” he said, voice so calm maybe you would have been scared if you were thinking straight. 

“Neither can I.” you said as you walked out of the house. 

The next day when you woke up, you felt bad for yelling at him. So you decided to go back and talk to him. And maybe you would have if fate didn’t have anything else planned. 

As you walked into the house, you saw a man sitting on your couch, Taehyung at his side as paper lay in front of him. The man looked at you briefly before turning back to Taehyung. “Thank you for coming on such short notice, Mr. Lee.” he said as he shook hands with the man. The man nodded. 

Before leaving, he looked at you, “See you in court.” 

You furrowed your brows before realization hit you. “Tae, what did he mean by that?” 

He kept quiet as he gathered the papers. “Baby, what’s wrong? Talk to me.” you tried again. Taehyung got up as he handed you the papers, then went to the bedroom. You stared at them as you couldn’t process anything. 

You cannot get divorced. You cannot live without him.  

You walked inside the room as you saw him looking out. “Tae, we can talk, right? You don’t mean this.” your voice shook. 

Walking up to him you wrapped your arms around his, face buried in his back as you mumbled “This is a joke, right?” 

You heard his sigh before he turned to you, eyes glossy. “We can’t keep doing this.”

“We won’t. We’ll figure it out. We don’t have to do this.” you went on. 

“Y/N-”

“No, no, you don’t understand. You are out of your mind. We can’t get divorced.”

“I’m sorry, but I cannot do this anymore.” he said,

You looked at him. “Why are you saying it as if it is all my fault?” 

“I don’t mean that.”

“You absolutely mean that. Your face says it all.” you gestured toward him. “Oh. You really are gonna do this?” you said as he rubbed his face. 

“Well, fuck you, Kim Taehyung. You can do whatever you want. You can blame me all you want but you and I both know the minute I walk out, you are going to regret this.” 

“You can keep going for my heart and put all this on me, but you will miss me to your bone the minute this is over.” you said as you stormed off. 

That night, you went back to Ae-ra’s place. You screamed at the sky pretending it was him while he stayed awake that night as he looked at the sky. “I’m so sorry Y/N. I love you so much” he said, tears freely falling.

It really was over. All your doubts came true. Your marriage ended. Maybe it was for the better. ‘You’re being paranoid’ he said. He was right. You became paranoid.

You wiped the single tear and looked at the sky, soft light spread across as the birds sang. 5:00 am

You picked out the attire you were going to wear to the court. Your phone buzzed as you picked it up. It was Ae-ra. It’s gonna be okay. You’ll get through it. she said.

You went to the court that day. You watched him as he entered the room, a black tux hugging his frame. He had become more buff than he was the last time you saw him two months ago. As he ran his fingers through his hair, his shoulder blades flexed. The same shoulder blades that had your nail marks reminding the night before from every morning you’ve spent together. You smiled at that memory. 

Soon the judge walked in and the process went on. 

At one point in your relationship with him, assuming was something you both picked up. Long gone was the trust which was the key in your relationship. Maybe it was for the better. You both were paranoid; assumptions feeding more into it. 

But what you both gradually became, was bad for each other. Not at the beginning of your relationship, but somewhere in the middle, it went out of hand. Maybe if you spoke to each other more, maybe if you hadn’t pushed your thoughts the first day it came, then maybe you wouldn’t be here. But everything happens for a reason. 

Kim Taehyung was the heartthrob of the campus. Kim Taehyung was the first person you confessed you loved. He was the first person who heard ‘I love you’ from you. He was your first love. 

As the saying goes, some people are in our lives, just to teach us a lesson. Good and Bad. Kim Taehyung was that for you. You were still in love with him. Distance makes the heart grow fonder and yours did. You loved him more than you did before. And so maybe letting him go was easy. You were bad for him and he was bad for you. But that didn’t stop you from loving him.

And that didn’t stop him from loving you as you sat at the courthouse, as he looked at your face when it was over, as he lay in his bed alone that night.

Maybe you weren’t meant to be. Or maybe you were, but you didn’t know-how. But it was fine. And maybe as time goes by, it would hurt less. 

Although you and Taehyung didn’t believe in first and second lives, you both wished you’d find each other in the next life as you both looked at the sky that night. 

taglist: @mwitsmejk​