#kayaking poetry

[aelfhild-astraedottir]

The mists of the past float about me now

Bringing the peace of good days gone by

When the water was calm about my kayak

Smooth to slice with paddle

When the bays of home spelled freedom

In the taste of salt on the air,

When I was as free upon the sea

As the eagles that gave pause that day

A moment of stillness in the morning

Before we all moved along our separate ways.

Photograph © Ælfhild Astrædottir 2019

Poem © Ælfhild Astrædottir 2023

[mylifeinpixels]

When I thought about how much I love bodies of water, all I could think of afterwards is how I am a body of water; and how if all bodies of water are beautiful and worth admiration and care, then I am too, as are you. You’re as unique as a rain drop and as beautiful as an ocean; as am I.

[wickedzeevyln]

Laniakea

There is a constellation that knows you well, a piece of heaven that saw you take your first steps,a clusters of stars that watched you fall to sleep and hushed you when you dreaded the burst of darkness overhead.They knew your story.They sang your lullabies.They fished out the moon out of the lake and washed off its impurities so you can hold soft light in your hands.They braved the rabid bites…

[yfexsexg]

I went kayaking and I fell out of the kayak but when I got out there was this small brown shell in my shoe. Idk if that symbolizes good luck or bad luck though. I guess it's good luck. There was a lot of what I assume was copper wire in the water. While I was there I came up with a poem lol. I don't remember but I think it was something like...

wire and lilypads

wire and lilypads

wire and lilypads

Maybe it goes on who knows. Anyway shell down below, the inside is almost pure white it's kinda a vibe. Like I relate.

Oh and also earlier today I was thinking about when I was like 7 and I was talking to this girl in my school who seemed like the most mature cool girl ever but she couldn't have been more than 12. She showed me a drawing she did and I said why didn't she color it all the way (she colored too far into the lines) and she said because she wanted to stay in the lines. I either said or thought that it's better to go outside the lines. I think that's poetic. I also saw a quote. "Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly." I don't resonate with the last sentence as much but I will eventually probably.

[boymeetszelda]

It Was Another Day

It was another day. Another day to lay. Another day to lay down my head and reflect on things to come. Another day to lay down my head and see where these thoughts have come from. It was a month to be remembered. Remembrance targeted at violence of the heart. Remembrance that brought joy out of the start. It was a month swiftly encumbered. Asking the thoughts of others to purify my soul. Asking…

[philgennuso]

First Spin ! (#NatureWednesday #Poetry)

Photo by Phil Gennuso Arts Kayaks waiting patiently,by the boating club,bright, colorful, eager,ready for the season’sfirst outing on the river!

[patcegan]

Sweet Granny Tales 9

Granny on Underwear“These bikini underwear ain’t decent, don’t cover nothin’ and I recon’ are miserable to wear. Give me my cotton bloomers any day! A gal can hang ’em on the line to dry without showin’ every man in the neighborhood her secrets! Granny on Talking at the Table“Never did understand why folks want to eat sittin’ in front of the TV. Afterwards, you don’t even remember what you ate!…

[klm-zoflorr]

Happy gay birthday to kayaking bisexual legend tim stoker, the poetry gay, knife lesbian, gun lesbian, puppy dom, mcEvil twink, gay divorces georg, wlw podcaster, arson yuri, queer nerd, homophobic vase and of course our dearly beloved jon archives "he doesn't do that stuff" jonathan jarchivist sims

[bunnyswritings]

50 (unconventional) date ideas for your otp

Attend an art fair together

Go on a hot air balloon ride

Furniture shopping date at Ikea

Visit an aquarium and have dinner in an underwater restaurant

Have a picnic at sunrise or sunset

Play 20 questions to get to know the other better

Take a pottery class together

Attend a silent disco party

Go indoor skydiving / bungee jumping

Take an aerial yoga class

Rent a couple bike and ride around town

Attend a poetry / book event

Have fun at a board game cafe

Visit a psychic and have fortunes read

Have a dine in the dark experience

Take a cooking / baking class together

Challenge each other at arcade games

Have a home movie night with popcorn and homemade nachos

Ice-skating when one doesn't know how to

Take a painting class / go for an art jam session together

Attend a play together

Go scuba diving together

Take a dance class together

Visit an animal sanctuary / shelter to volunteer together

Go for a kayaking adventure

Go to a comedy show

Organise a get-together potluck event with friends

Go to a drive-in movie theatre

Attend a beer or wine tasting event

Go to an escape room together

Visit an amusement park

Sign up for a themed run together

Go stargazing at a local observatory

Visit an art museum or gallery and have their caricatures drawn

Assemble a lego set together

Go on a scenic drive and have a picnic

Go on a nature trail walk together

Go camping together

Attend a themed costume party

Go to a local fair or festival

Take a horseback riding lesson together

Pet-sit a friend's pet together for a day

Play mini golf together

Have a spa day together

Take a sailing lesson together

Go rock climbing / bouldering together

Go to a karaoke bar

Take a sushi making class together

Visit an old bookstore or library

Play a game of laser tag

[simmerandwrite]

Sink Into Me - 05 - mob!Steve Rogers x plus size! reader

Summary: You were simply doing a good deed, pulling the handsome stranger out of the way when a car jumped the curb. Little did you know that the life you saved belonged to Steve Rogers, the Army veteran turned art dealer with connections to the Brooklyn crime syndicate.

Steve Rogers, who won’t stop calling you his guardian angel.

Steve Rogers, whose new goal in life just might be repaying his debt to you.

Steve Rogers, who isn’t shy until it comes to his feelings and will stop at nothing to keep you safe.

Chapters: 01 02 03 04 05 06 07 08

Wordcount: 6k

Warnings: some smut in this one, vague references to violence, canon level violence (series), body image issues (series)

Notes: thank you all for reading! means a lot to me. i’d love to hear your thoughts and remember, a reblog goes a long way for a writer on this hellsite!! ( if you see me in the wild, i’m @simmerandcry​​)  

--

As happy as you were to have Steve laying beside you in bed, you weren’t ready to sleep yet. Not when you hadn’t seen him in almost a week. Sure, you had both very quickly made up for lost time – you weren’t sure you’d be walking straight tomorrow – but it was these quiet moments, just the two of you, that you cherished the most.

With your head resting on his bare chest, you traced your fingers along the tattoos that decorated his skin. The eagle, the poetry verse, the cross, the script displaying his mother’s name - you liked how they all seemed to tell a story and also provide an extra bit of insight about Steve.

“Which one did you get first?” You asked quietly, propping yourself up slightly to get a better scan of his torso. He had pulled his boxers back on after you cleaned up but he still had plenty of skin showing. “And which one hurt the most?”

Steve glanced at your curious smile then scanned over his chest. “This one hurt the most, against my ribs.” He tipped to the side slightly, revealing a traditional style tattoo that lined the right side of his torso. “And the first..” A laugh escaped him, moving his hand to tug at the waistband of his boxers. He pointed to the faint outline of a fading tattoo, just a few letters that adorned the front of his left hip.

You twisted to see what he was pointing at. “I never noticed that - what does it say? ‘Punk’?”

“Yeah,” Steve was laughing again, running his thumb over the letters. “Me and Buck gave each other tattoos one night. Dumb teenage shit, you know?”

“That’s strangely… endearing,” you laughed along, letting out a long breath and returning to your spot resting against him. “Bucky’s your best friend?”

“Seems a bit juvenile to say it that way, but yeah. I trust him with my life.” Steve circled his arm around you and held you closer somehow. The light touch of his fingertips grazed your shoulders. “Me and him, we’ve.. We’ve been through a lot together.”

“Can you tell me something no one else knows about you?” You closed your eyes, fighting off the heavy wave of sleep that was creeping in. “Not even Bucky?”

“Hmm.” Steve paused, taking the extra moment to press a kiss to the top of your head while he thought of his answer. “I closed on a new property today.”

You opened your eyes again. “Okay, that’s… a fact, I guess.”

His chest rumbled, smirking. “I bought a cabin in Connecticut, near the state border. It’s a little thing - triangle A-frame structure, two bedrooms, comes with a canoe and a kayak, there’s a trail down to a lake..” 

You couldn’t help but push yourself up again, turning to smile at him with wide eyes. “It sounds beautiful! Just an investment property orr…”

“No, it’s for me. I want somewhere to escape the city. It needs some work but I want it to be all season.”

“I can’t wait to see some photos.”

“Maybe we could..” Steve trailed off, eyes closing momentarily before he opened just one to peek at you. “Could up there on a weekend? Just us two?”

Your cheeks warmed at the thought of a weekend away with Steve, away from everything, cozy around a fire. “That sounds like a dream.”

“Well, let’s make it happen, sweetheart.”

 ---

“Hey, you’ve barely even commented on that terrible design - where is your head right now?”

You sighed, tearing your empty stare from your TV across the room and down towards where Maria was sitting on the rug. You had invited her over to binge the latest season of your favourite reality tv fashion show and, well, you were clearly being a bad host. 

Truthfully, you were lost in your thoughts. You’d been drawing in them a lot over the past few weeks. You could feel your work life balance slipping away as another busy project season approached. And moving had thrown you for a loop. But mostly your mind was racing thinking about Steve. Your pros and cons list about him and the state of your relationship was growing on each side.

God, the pros were so good. He was attentive, kind and interesting. You both had fun together, you laughed a lot and he cared as much about Hercules as he did you. And the sex was amazing - he really enjoyed taking care of you. Steve was strong in his convictions, fought through adversity, and remained passionate about the things that mattered to him.

But on the other hand, you knew it was fair to have doubts. Steve was busy with work and whatever else was going on in his life and you didn’t see each other as often as you both would like. And there was the large mystery of what he really did for work anyway, though you could put enough pieces together. Quiet phone calls, an endless list of people who seemed to report to him, the illicit activities at the club, his resistance to the police… 

“Are you okay?” Maria shifted slightly, pausing the show and turning to look up at you as you clutched a pillow anxiously on the couch. 

“I’m just thinking about Steve,” you finally admitted, closing your eyes and collapsing back into the couch.

“What else is new?” Maria joked, eyes narrowed as you watched you. “What’s going on?”

“I’ve been willfully ignorant about his..” You hesitated. “..His work.”

Maria scooted closer, propped up on her knees. “Okay, yeah, let’s dig in because what is all that about? I was kind of joking about the mob thing but..” Her eyes grew dramatically wide. “Wait.” Reaching for her phone, she tapped on the screen and looked back at you. “Hey Google - what does a mob boss do?”

“No, come on,” you laughed, though it was mostly to hide your concern. “It’s going to burst the bubble, you know? The minute I really admit all this out loud.”

Maria scanned over the webpage illuminated on her phone. “It’s kind of a spectrum of information here. Whatever this thing is he’s running, they could have their hands in a lot of stuff like loaning money, tax fraud, political racketeering, illegal weapons, murd–”

Shaking your head, you reached for her phone and took it from her. “Stop, please. I don’t want to..” You sighed and draped your arm across your eyes. “Last week, I was staying over at his place and he got a call in the middle of the night. Something so important he had to leave for an hour but of course he didn’t give me any details. But that can’t be a good thing, right? I’m not an idiot.”

Maria just sighed, your name quiet on her lips. “I know you’re not an idiot. But maybe.. I don’t know. Maybe this was only meant to be short term.”

A beat of silence sat between you both. Eventually, you took a deep breath. “Steve is a good person.”

Maria nudged you with her elbow. “Is he?”

“Yes! The side of him I see is… good, I think.”

“And the side you don’t see?”

“That’s what I’m worried about.”

Maria said your name softly, enticing you to peel your arm away and look at her. “It just sounds like whatever Steve does - lawful or illegal or whatever - it could be dangerous. I don’t want you to get hurt or caught up in something you shouldn’t be a part of.”

“I don’t want that either,” you replied quietly. A dramatic groan followed as you fell sideways onto the couch cushions. You knew Steve would never, ever let you get hurt. The real problem though was - what could even be potential harm for you? Wasn’t being with Steve just adding to that big potential risk? Maybe it really was time to admit that and maybe it was time for a hard conversation. “It feels like I met the right person at the wrong time.”

Maria offered you a small sympathetic smile. “It also feels like it’s time for the second bottle of wine.”

 ---

Even thinking about starting the conversation with Steve intimidated you. Deep down, you knew you were just delaying it on purpose - remaining perfectly content in your honeymoon phase. 

After a long workday, you had collected Hercules from his daycare then headed home, showered and talked yourself into being bold enough to bring it up with Steve. You met him at Shield, where he promised he was just about done with some paperwork then you could find somewhere to go for dinner.

You waited patiently in the chair across from his desk, fingers tapping against the arm of the chair as you watched him. Out of all the days, it was this day he had chosen to reveal to you that he sometimes wore reading glasses.

And fuck if he didn’t look even more attractive in a pair of glasses. Now your stomach was swirling with anxiety and something else, too. You weren’t sure how much longer you could contain yourself.

“You okay?” Steve’s voice broke through your thoughts. You met his gaze over the desk. He had stopped his pen from marking up the ledger ahead of him, staring at you with stoic curiosity instead. “I’m almost done, I promise.”

“No, no. Take your time.” You waved your hand and looked anywhere else in the room. 

He kept a photo of his mom on the corner of his desk. A framed antique movie poster decorated one wall and–

“Sweetheart?” 

You sighed and looked back at him. “I’m fine. Just.. I had a long day. My boss has been micromanaging me like crazy and… just tired, I guess.” 

You could tell he didn’t really believe you, but thankfully he didn’t press. He did drop his pen down, though. With one swift motion, he closed his ledger book and leaned back in his chair. 

“C’mhere, my tired girl.” 

With another sigh, you pretended for a moment to consider rejecting how he was inviting you over to his side of the desk. But you couldn’t resist. You stood and shuffled your way over there, letting him gently perch you on the side of his desk as he stood from his chair.

His hands found your hips quickly, as he leaned down and looked into your eyes. “We don’t have to go out.”

“No, no,” you shook your head. “I want to! I just..” You scrunched up your face, trying to find something convincing to say. “My mind is all over the place today.”

Steve gave you one of his little charming half smiles, slotting himself between your legs and moving his hands up to cradle both your cheeks. His thumb brushed over the apple of your cheeks. “Do you wanna tell me what’s going on?”

Before you could let out the breath you were holding, across the room someone banged on the door. Steve grumbled under his breath and opened his mouth to dismiss whoever was there, but instead the door rushed open.

“Rogers, your phone broken? We were supposed to start this meeting twenty –” 

You tried to turn your head to see who was there, but Steve held you steady. A series of expletives left his mouth as he stepped back for a moment, shouting towards the door. 

“And since when do we meet in my fucking office, Russo?” Steve dropped his hands and moved towards the door, acting as a barrier between you and the opposite side of the room. You craned your neck to see them standing on either side of the doorway.

“I’ll meet you at the bar then..” The other voice eventually replied, footsteps disappearing in the hallway.

“Fuck..” You heard Steve muttering again. 

Well, date night was definitely off the table, you were certain of it.

“Sweetheart, I’m sorry. I double booked and –”

“Steve, it’s fine.” You dismissed him immediately, hopping off the desk and meeting him in the middle of the room. “I can take my rotten mood home, it’s probably better this way.”

“I’ll get Shaun to take you home, okay? He should be downstairs.” 

You could see the genuine disappointment on Steve’s face. He clearly felt bad that his meeting had slipped his mind but it occurred to you that certain things were probably easier for him to prioritize and, well, where did that leave you?

You just nodded and accepted the offer. Steve grabbed your hand and guided you back down to the main part of the bar, making one quick hand motion to his driver, who immediately jumped to attention and hurried outside to pull a car around.

“Come over after?” You brought your hand up and poked his chest. “I’ll order a pizza?”

He nodded, reaching for his wallet. “Let me pay for it, at least.”

“Steve,” you laughed, stopping his hand and looking over your shoulder briefly. You didn’t recognize a few of the people lingering around the bar, a few of which were clearly watching you and Steve. “It’s okay.”

He sighed, head shaking. When you resisted again, he held up his hands in defense. “Fine, but I’m coming over with a pint of gelato then.”

You smiled. “Sounds amazing.” You looked back again, then raised up onto your tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his lips. “I’ll see you later.”

---

Steve sent you a few updates throughout the night. That his meeting went longer than he hoped, that they had to meet up with someone else, that he was sorry and would be there soon. When he finally showed up, you had already packed the pizza away and changed into your pajamas to sprawl out on the couch. Hercules was sprawled out under your feet just the same.

When he opened the door, you twisted and offered him a smile. Though it disappeared quickly when you got a better look at him under the lights in your kitchen. You didn’t mean to gasp but when you narrowed your eyes, you couldn’t believe what you were seeing. 

“Steve - are you bleeding?” You leaped up from the couch and met him near the kitchen sink, pulling his shoulder in an attempt to see his neckline better. “There’s blood all over your—“

“Shit.” He took a step back from you, letting out a long breath as he lifted a hand to his collar. “Fucking shit.”

“Are you hurt? What happened?” You twisted your head again, trying to look but he turned away. “Steve.”

Silence hung between you both. 

Eventually, he cleared his throat. “I’m fine. It’s…it’s not my blood.”

You took a step back, trying to ignore the heavy feeling that took over your stomach. Maybe you were about to have the dreaded conversation sooner than later. 

Steve turned on his heel and looked at you, teeth gritted as he found his words. “It's, uh, an occupational hazard.”

Brow furrowed, you frowned. “This isn’t funny.”

He pulled at his collar and sighed again. “I’m not laughing.”

“Steve.” You walked backwards until you hit your couch, perching yourself on the end with crossed arms as you watched him across the room. He wasn’t making this conversation any easier - shedding his jacket and collared shirt left him in just a goddamn white tanktop and fuck if he didn’t look so incredibly built. “Did you - did you ki-”

He cut you off, head shaking as he muttered out your name. “Please don’t ask that question.”

You took a deep breath. “We have both been ignorant here, okay? And I don’t want to ask but I don’t know if I can avoid it anymore so.. So, you’re in.. the mob? You run the…”

Steve smirked, briefly, then shook his head as his jaw tensed. His discomfort was evident in every twitch. “That’s an archaic term.” He let the air out of his lungs then reached for his jacket. “No, we can’t do this. I won’t do this.”

“Tell me the truth!” Your voice came out louder than you intended, but you carried on. “I’m not an idiot, Steve. And neither are you. I’m smart enough to figure out that whatever you consider your ‘business’ - it’s above the law, or below it, I guess.”

He gritted his teeth for a moment as he considered his words. “Fine. I guess we’re talking about this now.” He paused. “It’s my responsibility to manage a network of people, alright? People who..”

“You can’t even say it out loud,” you scoffed quietly, shaking your head as you looked away. 

Steve huffed, calling your name to grab your attention again.  “What do you want me to say, huh? That I have a team of people working for me. I loan money, I make trades and get a cut, I turn a blind eye to things when necessary. I don’t always follow the rules or act with civility. That part of my life -I, I don’t want you involved, okay? So forgive me for trying to shield you from that.”

“Don’t act like you’re doing me a favour, Steve!” You sighed. “I don’t get it. You’ve shown me who you are - who you really are - time and time again and that version of you, I just.. how does the Steve who has a little hideaway cottage upstate, who-who funds after school programs in his neighbourhood - how does he kill people!?”

Steve took a step forward, your name on his lips. “Listen to me, I didn’t—”

You choked out a dry laugh “Stop. You have literal blood on your hands.”

He shook his head, mouth agape. “I use force when I need to and I like to ensure my message is understood by any means possible. But unless absolutely necessary, I don’t take lives.” 

“How am I supposed to believe that?”

“I told you I’d never lie to you.”

You didn’t reply. 

“You called me, sweetheart. Remember?” He closed in the space between you and reached for your hand. “Those idiots were breaking into your apartment and you didn’t dial 911, you called me. Why?”

Hesitantly, you extended your arm and let him squeeze your hand. 

He brushed his thumb across your knuckles. “Because you know that deep down, maybe the cops wouldn’t get there quick enough. Maybe they wouldn’t help you at all. You’d get a report, one follow up call and nothing else. I know there are good cops but they are overworked and outnumbered. And the bad ones.. I’m doing my part and taking care of my city in any way I can.”

You looked up at him again. The blood was still staining his neck. With one firm tug, you removed your hand from his hold. Your voice shook. “You should go.”

“I think we need to— ”

You flicked your wrist to the door. “Go.”

Though you could see him resisting, Steve relented and stepped back from you. His mouth opened to argue but snapped shut quickly. Gripping his soiled shirt, he moved towards the doorway. 

“Steve?” You stood up and he paused, meeting your glossy eyes. “Do you think you’re a good person?”

“What matters more is if you think I’m a good person, sweetheart.” He paused and waited for a reaction from you but you remained motionless. “I’ll, uh- goodnight. I’m sorry.”

Just as soon as the door clicked shut, you collapsed onto your couch, consumed by your tears. 

 ---

You weren’t entirely sure why your day went so poorly - was it your boss and their awful attitude? Was it the coffee you spilled all over your lap at lunch? Was it the fact that ignoring Steve and every thought about him was grinding on your emotions?

All you wanted was a hot shower and dinner under a blanket on the couch. That was it. You just had to make it home. You figured at least the bad day was behind you as you headed to your apartment. Because you couldn’t imagine it getting worse.

Hah. 

You [6:51PM]: hey You [6:51PM]: i know we left everything up in the air You [6:51PM]: but I don’t know what to do  You [6:52PM]: I think someone is following me

Maybe you were being paranoid. Because you were in a hurry. For that same reason, you couldn’t be certain the same man from the subway was following you to your bus stop. But when you hesitated and turned down a side street, pretending to be very interested in the fruit display outside some nearby bodega, he slowed down too. And when you opted to turn back and join the line at Starbucks, as a test, he followed. 

You tried not to panic. 

Your first thought was to message Steve, a habit you had been struggling to resist all week. He’d reached out a handful of times since your fight but you had done a damn good job not replying. But now? He was the first person to come to your mind.

Moments after you reached out to him, your phone rang. 

You brought it to your ear as you waited in line. “Hi.”

“Are you safe? Where are you? Can you share your location with me?”

You let out a long breath. “Sure, just a sec.” You pulled your phone away and did as he requested. “Done.”

“That’s perfect, thank you sweetheart. I’m on my way to meet you. Are there a lot of people around you?”

“Yes, plenty.” 

“Great. My GPS is telling me you’re at Starbucks? Is that right?”

“Yeah - want me to grab you a cake pop? You seem like the cake pop type.” You paused. “I’m just gonna order - should I call you back or..?”

“No, you’re good. I’ll be right here. Go ahead.”

You smiled at the barista, trying to maintain your composure. Pulling your phone down slightly, you ordered. “Just a tall americano, please. With a bit of milk.”

Steve chirped in your ear. “Decaf?”

Oh, shit. It was after six already. And here Steve was, in the middle of your panic, reminding you of your own caffeine sensitivity. You paused before paying for your drink. “Can you make that decaf, please?”

After you paid, you heard Steve again. “I’m about a block away.” God, he was moving fast. You could hear honking behind him. 

“Okay, I’m uh..” You faltered, scanning the crowd for the man who has been following you. You ducked behind a couple sitting at a tall table when you noticed him lingering near the door. “The guy.. I think he’s waiting for me to leave. Maybe. I don’t know, actually. I might have made this whole thing up or -”

“Just stay where you are, keep talking to me.” It sounded like he was walking now. “Whatever your gut tells you, it's important. Nothing wrong with that, I promise.”

You hummed a quiet agreement. That kind of justification did make you feel better but your doubts continued to creep in. Grabbing your drink as your name was called, you took a few steps forwards and finally spotted Steve at the door. 

“The guy in the blue jacket?”

You quietly confirmed, finally meeting Steve’s eyes across the sea of people waiting in line. The sight of his smile, though just there for a moment, mostly settled the turmoil in your stomach. 

“Just stay right there until I come get you, okay?”

With a final nod, Steve ended the call and returned his phone to his pocket. Then you watched as he very subtly stepped up to the man you had described, leaning in to whisper something in his ear. 

The man froze. 

Steve reached out and gripped his shoulder, guiding him outside and beyond the window. Then you lost sight of them both and you tried not to let your mind wander. 

You sipped your coffee, sliding into a chair at a free table - though you were smart enough to keep your back to the wall, waiting for Steve to come back for you. Finally letting yourself breathe, the gravity of the situation seemed to settle in you. Why was someone following you? Was this connected to the break in at your apartment again? Was it something related to Steve?

Steve. 

God, you couldn’t believe how he dropped everything to come protect you from whatever this was, if it was anything at all. Actually, no, you could believe it. Because Steve had proven many times that he cared about you and your wellbeing. 

“What matters more is if you think I’m a good person, sweetheart.”

Could a good person do bad things? Didn’t that make them a bad person? Fuck, you didn’t want to get into the moral gymnastics of this again. 

You were freed from the spiral of thoughts when Steve dropped into the seat across from you, eyes narrow with concern. You knew he was searching your face for distress, pain, anything.

“You okay?” Finally he spoke, slowly reaching his hand out to grab yours as it sat on the table. You squeezed back as he held on.

“Yeah, I think so.”

“He didn’t touch you?” 

“No, no. Kept his distance enough that I was second guessing myself but..” 

You wanted to ask who the guy was, if Steve knew him, why he might be following you. But you didn’t really want answers to those questions.

“Let me take you home,” Steve let your hand go and nodded towards the door. “Do you need to get Hercules?”

You revealed a small smile though it faded quickly. “I do.. but..” You swallowed the lump in your throat and closed your eyes. “Can I.. I don’t want to be alone.”

“Okay, let’s grab your boy and we’ll go to my place.”

---

Despite the straight lines and cool tones that decorated Steve’s apartment, you felt comfortable there. The entire journey to get through his door, from the car ride to the elevator, you felt like you were holding your breath. But walking into his living room, as Hercules padded across the kitchen floor to slurp up some water from a dish Steve had left for him, you felt the tension release from your shoulders. Finally.

You fiddled with the sleeves of your sweater as you crossed the room, stopping in front of the large windows that looked down onto the city. You felt small suddenly.

Behind you, Hercules’ wandering footsteps came to an end as he flopped down in the middle of the living room. Then, you could hear Steve walking towards you too, slowly. 

He stopped at your side, casting a brief sideways glance to you before he shifted his gaze to the skyline.

You swallowed hard, tangling your hands together as you spoke. “I called you.. that night... Because you make me feel safe, Steve. I can’t really explain it but it’s something I’ve never felt before..” A small laugh escaped you. “Even now, wearing my heart on my sleeve, I think I should be scared and yet..” Turning your head to the side, you met his eyes. “..I’m safe.”

You couldn’t read his reaction. Was it confusion, relief, understanding? He dragged a hand across his jaw before looking away again. 

“Steve?” You grabbed his nearest hand. “Thank you.”

To your surprise, Steve pulled his hand back for a moment then turned and brought it up to cradle your cheek. His eyes burned with something you hadn’t seen before - something deep, intense. “You don’t have to thank me - you shouldn’t have to thank anyone for caring about you, sweetheart. It’s an honour — it’s my privilege to keep you safe.”

You were shrouded in him - the intense feeling of protection radiated through his stare, through his touch, his words. Why couldn’t this be easier? Right then, it felt easy but you knew it wouldn’t always be that way.

You closed your eyes briefly then looked back up at him. “What do we do now?”

He licked his lips, resisting breaking eye contact with you. “Who I am- it doesn’t go away.”

“I know. Logically, maybe walking away makes sense.. before this gets more tangled. But I just don’t… that’s not what I want.”

Steve stepped forward, closing in the space between you. “Okay. Then what do you want?”

You couldn’t answer. You wanted to smash your lips into his, run your hands down his back, feel him on top of you. But your logical brain stopped you. With all the willpower you could manage, you pulled away and took a small step back. “I want to.. uhm. Shower. Do you mind if I—”

Steve took a step back too, nodding. “Of course. Yeah. Go ahead. There’s fresh towels in my bathroom..” 

With a solemn nod you turned and headed down the hall, doing your best not to look back at him. 

Fuck, you were so totally fucked. What the fuck were you doing?

Steve’s shower was incredible compared to the one in the guest room. Spacious, with heated tile on the floor and a rainfall shower head. You turned on the water to warm up as you undressed, opening the door to his small linen cabinet to grab a towel. Then you saw it - the neat stack of your preferred shampoo, conditioner, lotion and body wash. 

Had Steve grabbed those just for you? You could cry just thinking of him walking around CVS and matching the toiletries to the ones you kept in your own bathroom. You wrapped the towel around your torso and moved the soaps to the bench in the shower, then peaked your head out the bathroom door. 

“Steve?” You called out his name, hearing quick footsteps heading your way. 

He stepped into the bedroom and met you at the door frame. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I just, uh..” you hesitated, taking a deep breath. “I can’t figure out how the shower works.”

He frowned. “Huh. I can show you the-” His face turned to a smile instead, taking in your coy smirk. With one hand he reached for the hem of his shirt. He gave you another look, as if to make sure you really wanted his company. 

You grabbed his hand, letting your towel drop to the floor. “Come on.”

Steve didn’t waste any time tearing off his clothes and joining you under the water. Once you were both well soaked, the whole shower filled with steam as his lips found yours. 

He was hungry for you and you were hungry for him too. Gone were the doubts and fears and worries as you were left with just Steve - with his calloused careful hands and his soft lips, his calculated touch. He was a man with a mission. 

“Fuck,” you whimpered out, breathless as Steve’s lips moved towards your neck. “Steve, I..” 

“Tell me what you need, baby. Tell me and you can have it.” His hands snaked over your body, gliding easily over every inch of your skin. 

You gasped as his hands gripped your ass, before slipping around to the front, between your legs.

“There.. Yes,” you breathed out against the shell of his ear. “Make me come, please. Fuck me, tell me I’m yours..”

One of Steve’s hands came back up to capture your lips again, to cradle your jaw as his other started to play a symphony between your legs. His fingers moved gently at first, circling your clit slowly to warm you up. His tongue danced against yours, grinning against your mouth as you let out a tiny whimper. “Is that good? Is this what you need, my love?”

My love? The man was going to kill you, unraveling you inch by inch, touch by touch. 

“Yes, yes!” Was all you could muster to reply as Steve sped up, challenging both himself and you to get you there with a bigger impact. You barely had time to prepare yourself for the climax, shaking against his hand as his lips clamped down against the skin of your neck. 

You could tell he was going to leave a mark there.

You didn’t care.

In a swift motion, he moved his hand from between your legs to the outside of your thigh, lifting it up against his hip and pulling back enough to align himself with you. On your other leg, you raised yourself onto your toes to meet him and then you heard it - that deep, sensual growl that echoed from his chest.

“Holy fuck, baby,” he seethed through his teeth, head tipped back momentarily as he pushed himself fully into you. You pulled him back to your mouth, holding his cheeks in your hands as you breathed him in. “I need this - need you..” 

He collapsed against you, thrusting slow and steady, eliciting a whine from you with every extra push. And then, before you could even understand what was happening, Steve was lifting you - hands gripping the underside of your ass cheeks to hold you steady. You nearly protested, thinking about the sheer physics of what was happening - but damnit, Steve was stronger than you realized. 

“I won’t let you fall, baby. Won’t let anything happen to my girl, I promise..” He answered your racing questions without hesitation, keeping you safe and secure in his arms as he fucked into you with an unmatched intensity. Christ, you feared the tiles might shatter behind your back. 

“You’re my girl, all mine..”

You wondered momentarily if the subtext behind his words matched yours. When he said you were his, did he mean it? In his heart and soul? 

“Wanna do this forever..” He continued, head nestled beside your own as his pace increased. “Wanna make you feel good, happy. Safe. Want you around me forever.”

You were nearly bursting at the seams, anticipating the wave of feelings as another orgasm approached. “Steve..” you were breathless, barely audible in his ear. “Come with me, baby.”

“I’m close..” he returned, pulling back to find your lips. “I’m gonna— ”

He collapsed against you as he reached his peak, grunting as the last motions of his hips tensed and he flooded into you. He held you there, legs shaking around him as you came down from your own climax. 

You both caught your breath, lost in the sound of the water hitting the tiled floor. 

 ---

Steve never wanted to take his moments with you for granted, especially in the early morning light. You were a dream under the golden rays - somehow attached to his side in your sweet slumber. This was all he dreamed of. Silent, calm, serenity. 

Resisting his urge to check his phone, he shuffled and pulled his arm around you, keeping your back cradled against his chest. Fuck, even your half dressed form under the sheets had him ready to go first thing in the morning. 

You rustled under his hold. “Morning..” The rasp of your first spoken words melted his heart. 

“Did I wake you?” He asked before pressing a kiss to your neck, hot breath tickling your skin. 

“No, no. Internal clock. Herc probably needs to go out..”

“He’s still asleep,” Steve replied, pausing to crane his neck and check on your sleeping dog just outside the doorway to his room. “Content.”

“Me too,” you said quietly, pressing your hips back against Steve. All of him. A low moan escaped you. “Very good morning..”

Steve took that as enough of a cue and let his lips get to work. Kisses were pressed against your neck and shoulders as the hand tucked around your waist reached below your shirt. With every twist of your nipples, your hips moved more aggressively. 

Steve grinned. “Let me take care of you, baby.” His hands explored all over - from your chest, across your soft stomach to underneath the waistband of your underwear. “God damn, I love how you feel. All ready for me..”

It wasn’t long before you were shaking at his hands and he was lifting your thigh to slide in, hungry and relentless to really feel you. He held you tight, your bodies moulded together as the city woke up beneath you. Steve breathed out your name again and again, like some kind of secret prayer. 

With a firm hand gripping your hip, he let himself go with a possessive growl. God, he could start every day like this forever if you’d let him - a reminder to you both of how he felt for you, how you were tied together, how you’d both get to think back to this moment during every other hour of the day. 

Eventually, you had to leave the bed and return to the real world. 

Steve took you home, waited as you got changed for work as he caught up on his own outstanding messages. Then he took you to drop off Hercules and delivered you safely to the front door of your office. 

After one or two or three kisses, you reached for the handle of your door. He called your name to stop you. 

“Steve, I’m already late,” you frowned, tipping your head to watch him. 

He sighed, though a small apologetic lined his face. “Just one more thing. Next weekend - would you be up for a road trip to the cabin? We can talk about.. everything.”

You thought for a moment then nodded. “Yeah, that sounds good.” Leaning in, you stole another kiss. “Okay, I’ve gotta get upstairs. Thanks for the ride. I lov-” You blinked and caught yourself. “I’ll talk to you later.”

Steve watched as you hurried away. He sighed, teeth clenched, only putting his car back into drive once you were safely inside. 

With a tight grip on the steering wheel, Steve headed into Manhattan. The early morning traffic would normally bother him, but he didn’t mind the extra time with his thoughts before he made it to his meeting. 

If he could even call it a meeting. God, he hated the mind games his mentor liked to play. Elusive, tricky and always trying to teach a lesson - Nick Fury was a force to be reckoned with. 

Steve pulled up to the The Gemini Hotel, nodding to the young kid scurrying working the valet desk as he handed over his keys and headed inside. Steve didn’t bother even sparing a glance towards the attendant at the front desk and he ignored the concierge too, striding directly to the elevator to head up to the penthouse. Conveniently, he ran smack into Fury’s right hand man once Steve stepped into the elevator. 

“You’re about twelve hours late,” Phil Coulson started, eyes stealing ahead as they travelled upwards. 

Steve didn’t reply. When the elevator dinged, Steve surged forward and hurried down the hall to the familiar suite. With a grunt, he pushed past the security guard waiting outside the door and made his way inside.

“Good fucking lord, can’t a man read the paper and eat his croissant in peace?”

Steve ignored the commentary from Nick Fury, who was leaning back in an office chair with his feet propped up on the desk.��Steve reached across and pulled the newspaper away, slamming his hands down on the desk and staring the other man down. “Fury, we need to talk.”

--

Up next: drama, probably. and some more Steve POV.

CHAPTER 04 - CHAPTER 06

[ao3feed-jonmartin]

Not-Date

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/azjX2J0 by neverendingdrums When Jon gets a Vision of the Unknowing - forecast to take place in Manchester in twenty-four hours' time - he asks Martin to accompany him on an overnight work trip. However, Visions may not be as reliable as they seem, and tensions may be running high... A Jonmartin fluff comedy with mild horror. Part 2 of the series "It's what you don't Know". Words: 2594, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English Series: Part 2 of It's what you don't Know Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: M/M Characters: Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Martin Blackwood, Tim Stoker (The Magnus Archives) Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist Additional Tags: Fluff, Sexual Tension, Graysexual Jonathon Sims, Allosexual Martin Blackwood, POV Martin Blackwood, POV Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Demisexual Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Work trip, Road Trip, The Unknowing, Tim is still somewhat okay because he deserves better, Martin Blackwood's Poetry, The Magnus Archives (Podcast) as a Workplace Comedy, No beta we kayak like Tim, Thank you to whoever invented that tag read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/azjX2J0

[stellas-et-abyssum-vincite]

The Princess's Guard ~ *Kaeya Alberich*

Summary: The two of you have been engaged in a secret affair for a long time... and Kaeya wants to do something to prove how much he loves you. However, you're not sure how long this engagement can last...

Pairing: Kayak Alberich X Fem!Reader

Genre: Angstyish Drabble

Word Count: 915

Warning: Hurt no comfort

Masterlist

"We shouldn't be doing this." You urgently whispered to the man who was holding your hand, as he led you through the dark, half-abandoned tunnels under the castle.

He simply shot you a mischievous grin. "You worry too much. Everything is completely safe, I promise you. No one is going to find us down here."

You shook your head. "That's what I'm worried about. If we get caught in a booby trap, no one is going to find us and we'll die down here!"

"Then I will die with you in my arms. I cannot think of a more fitting way to leave this life." 

Though his words flattered you, anxiety chilled your bloodstream, which made it harder to appreciate his poetry. You don't even know why you let Kaeya convince you to traipse through the tunnels like this. You were far more content hiding in your bedroom, where a fire kept you warm and there wasn't the fear of death, although there was another kind of fear lurking in your room.

You shook your head in an attempt to clear your conflicting thoughts. This was crazy, and you knew it. What was worse is that Kaeya knew it too. Yet you simply had to follow where he led. That's what you do when you truly love someone that much. No matter how crazy or dangerous the situation, you would always follow Kaeya, just like he would follow you.

Eventually he stopped before the end of the hallway. There was an ancient wooden door before the two of you, the metal hinges coated in rusted and the bottom of the wood was splitting. He grinned at you before he pushed the door open.

Behind it, there was an empty solarium. You were surprised to see the windowed ceiling, which was now covered in climbing vines outside. Despite the excess vegetation, the room looked perfectly habitable. How you never knew about this before was beyond you.

"One of the maids spoke about this place, back before your mother was Queen." Kaeya explained, his arms spread wide as he showed off the place. "During garden parties, if it ever rained, everyone would shelter here. The hallway gave perfect access for servants to go back and forth to the kitchens without getting wet. When I found this place again, I cleaned it up and it made it nice for you."

"You did all of that for me?" Your hand touched your heart. "Why?"

He took a step towards you and took your hand in his again. There wasn't a sense of urgency this time. It was a tender gesture that made your heart melt. "I know we can't sneak around in your room for much longer. The others are getting suspicious of how frequently we spend time together. So I needed a place for the two of us where we could meet without prying eyes."

"Oh, Kaeya." You were absolutely touched by his gesture. "That's so sweet of you. I love it!"

You pulled him into a hug and his lips found your cheek. You allowed yourself this little moment of tender love, for you wanted nothing more than to be completely lost in this moment forever. However, you knew better than anyone that some wishes aren't meant to come true. 

And you knew you needed to confront a very real problem.

"Kaeya, we can't." You whisper in his ear.

He groaned. "But I haven't done anything yet! And I wasn't going to until I finally put a real bed in here."

"No, that's not what I meant!" You pulled away with your cheeks bright red. "I mean we can't keep sneaking around like this."

Kaeya frowned at your words. "Why not? What's wrong, my love?"

You shook your head and sighed as your hand squeezed his. "Kaeya, I am a princess, betrothed to a prince in an attempt to keep the peace between our two nations. You and I can never be. And the longer we keep this up, the harder it will be to break it off when I'm married."

He frantically shook his head and tried to embrace you again, but you took a step back. "No. Don't say such things. I refuse to give you up that easily."

"Kaeya-"

"I'm serious! I love you, more than anything! And I know you love me just as much! So please don't break my heart like this!"

"I'm not trying to! I'm trying to protect both of us!" You tried to explain though you could feel your own heart tear inside your chest. "If anyone were to ever find out about us, you'll be put to death. I refuse to be the cause of your downfall. So please, for both our sake and the sake of our country, let's finally break things off."

His hand tightly squeezed yours, as his eyes stayed on the ground before him. "Just tell me one more time that you love me. Tell me you will always love me and only me, no matter what divides us."

With tears in your eyes, you nodded. While you looked at him, he refused to meet your gaze. "Yes, I love you. I love you and only you and I will never, ever stop loving you for as long as I live."

As his grip loosened, you withdrew your hand. You left your love and your heart behind in that solarium as you walked down the hall to the future you were destined to have.

[woozysioux]

girlblogger questions ୭ 🧷 ✧ ˚. ᵎᵎ 🦄

tysm for the tag @morbidteenagediaryy i'm honored that you think of me as a girlblogger 🖤🥹

🪻current fav songs

🪻obsession at the moment

nu metal (this is always my obsession not just at the moment 🖤)

checking my newest piercing every 0.25 seconds to make sure it hasn't fallen out of my face 🤣

concert movies & behind the music docs

that purple glow / neon city / cyberpunk-ish kinda aesthetic

arcology (architectural ecology)

savoring every last second of the cold weather before it starts getting warmer (aka instant death)

🪻 celebrity crush

jonathan davis

susan sarandon

jerry cantrell

(yeah i want a sugar mommy / daddy sue me)

🪻fav drink & food

coffee, bubble tea, lemondrop martinis

jerk chicken, bao buns, curry, homemade mac & cheese

🪻place i'd like to live

somewhere with a colder climate than where i currently live lmao

🪻style

like a love child between a dark spooky bitch & and hippie stoner

🪻hobbies

concerts / live music / music in general

hiking & kayaking

getting body mods

baking

ink drawing

nature / travel photography

crochet & domestic crafting

writing poetry that will never ever be seen by other human eyes

burning trees 🍃💨

🪻tagging:

@dreamoftheotherlife2 @littlemiss-stardust @mangosteine @satanlikedmymoxie @cleverbabyghoul @necrotic-biotic @beeczarbagel @sparklebussy @aspdsuicidal @ckozy (my apologies & feel free to ignore or change the wording of the post if you don't identify as a girl / feel uncomfortable with the term "girlblogger")

[topazadine]

A Non-Comprehensive Look at Sina

Sina is a coastal country with a number of outlying islands. Lift-ways ("east") is the Melinun Sea, the reason for its prosperity as a bastion of trade. Drop-ways ("west") is Breme across the Rimuk Mountains. This impenetrable mountain range has been a source of frustration for the Sinan Royal Family since the two countries were split in two by High Poetry.

Sinan Geography

Sinan geography is wildly different from that of Breme. Instead of sweeping steppes, Sina is swampy, mostly flat, and very rainy. Breme is in the rain shadow of the Rimuk Mountains, while Sina is on the windward slope.

One can think of Sina as the first stair in a staircase. The Rimuks are the rise on one side, and the cliffs on the edge of the continent are the foot. Rain cascades down the Rimuks and percolates throughout the country down to the sea. Below the rich muddy soil is granite, meaning that little water penetrates below the surface.

Sina's borders are clear on the mainland: the Rimuk Mountains and the edge of the continent. Its capital city, Kulniryi, is located along the middle of its coastline; the deep, natural harbor is one of the only places where the ground dips down to sea level, making it a perfect fit for commerce.

Around the harbor, the cliffs rise again; most are not of interest but for Thieves' Quarter, where ruffians have carved their homes directly into the rock for better protection for their illicit activities. Some whisper that these carved homes have secret passages that thread all along the underside of the city, popping up in unexpected places to ease the work of ne'er-do-wells.

The Melinun Sea is dotted with additional islands, some large and some small. The largest and most isolated of these are penal colonies, where the worst prisoners are sent to dog-infested islands to be eaten alive. Other small clusters may be farms, military outposts, lighthouse stations, or pleasure oases.

Sina has several territorial disputes with its neighbors on some of the farthest-reaching islands, a constant source of consternation for the queen. She resolved the disputes with their closest neighbor, Iunis, by marrying one of her daughters to their king.

As one moves drop-ways, a lacey network of small rivers provides fertile ground all across the country, though some areas are too swampy and fetid for habitation. Of particular intrigue is the area around Heretic's Way, whose rich soil has lay abandoned for centuries. This was the path that the traitorous Princess Yiella took out of Sina when she joined with the proto-Bremish against her mother, who was attempting to subjugate the nomadic tribes.

Most of the major cities are named after previous rulers; they are designed around the landscape, giving each a sense of place and a unique flair. For example, Traifalnar is built on a swamp, with deep foundations buried in the rock and homes bolstered by an interesting network of steel wires that keep them upright.

Kayaks are a common mode of transportation because they are lightweight and maneuverable, though there are also excellent trails for bicycles.

Threaded throughout the country are tin mines, some abandoned and others still active. Spies, smugglers, and the general criminal rabble use these to pass from town to town. While the Sinans are not generally superstitious, most fear these mines, as they whisper that kidnappers use them to sell women and children - or simply murder them.

Sinan Fauna

Briar bear - Haunts the swamps and briars of the country. A large, mottled, streaky-looking animal with enormous claws. Terrifying.

Velvet deer - So named for their beautiful antlers that never lose their velvet, but remain fuzzy and soft all year round. The velvet was previously used as folk medicine. Much has been written about how velvet deer's antlers sparkle after a rainstorm.

Rimuk wildcats - As in Breme, Rimuk wildcats haunt the highest reaches of the mountains. Their screams are bone-chilling when they resound off the rocks.

Esker - A type of aquatic mustelid that swims through the many channels, eating fish. Supposedly tastes delicious.

Alnan rabbits - Large, loping rabbits, technically an invasive species. They are named after the country's founder, Queen Alnan, who brought them from her home country. Some were released and became feral; now they practically overrun the country.

Herons - Found all across the country along rivers.

Rock eagles - Typically found along the Rimuk Mountains, but they have also been known to make their eyries in tall buildings, including the Kulniryi palace where the Sinan Royal Family lives.

Black squirrels - They have excellent camoflage for the deep, shady forests.

Blue spotted lizard - Bright blue, poisonous lizard found in the swamps.

Peeping frogs - There are dozens of different subspecies of peeping frogs throughout the country. They each have a slightly different song, which means that you can tell what part of the country you are in based on the melody of the frogs. This has given Sina several nicknames amongst other countries, not all of which are very nice. One is "The Land of Natural Music," while another is "Croakland."

Lacy turtles - So named for the light, lacey patterns along the shells.

Koi - The most common fish in the country. Good eating.

Suluk sea lions - Important to Sinan mythology, as it is said that a miraculous Suluk sea lion protected their founder after a shipwreck.

Whelkies - A type of mollusk.

Silver crabs - Not actually made of silver, of course, but their light gray shells are very striking. Good camoflage against the gray cliffs that make up the edge of the continent.

Blue dolpins - Often found cavorting and playing in the waves along the shore.

Harbor whales - Small whales that prefer protected inlets and bays.

Mules - Stubborn and hardy, they are great for long-distance trips.

Goats - Used for their meat and milk.

Timber horses - Large draft horses used to drag away timber.

Sprig horses - Light-boned animals that are mostly for sport and casual riding. Only owned by the upper classes.

Sinan Flora

Cedar

Pine

Black spruce

Boxwood

Ficus

Pothos

Quince

Azalia

Peonies

Hydrangeas

Custard apples

Pears

Sedge grass

Sea buckthorn

Kelp

Bladderwrack

Forest orchids

Forest grass

Cattails

Rushes

Duckweed

Water fern

Important Personages in Sina

While Sina has had numerous rulers, only a few are remembered well (or are currently important).

Queen Alnan - The founder of the country. Sailed away from her home country of Nuntak, a down-ways ("south") island country, to oppose religious rule. Subjugated and drove out the nomadic tribes already present, who became the Bremish.

Princess Yiella - Also known as "Heretic Yiella," she was Queen Alnan's daughter. She grew sympathetic to the plight of the tribes and joined them on their escape from Queen Alnan's rule.

Queen Kulni - Queen Alnan's second daughter, who was named queen after her mother's death instead of Princess Yiella. While Queen Alnan founded the country, Queen Kulni was responsible for most of the current infrastructure and political system.

Queen Susuma - The Queen of Sina when The Eirenic Verses begins. She is renowned for having developed solar power, one of the most important inventions in the history of the country (if not the world).

Princess Haniya - Queen Alnan's daughter and one of the main characters of The Eirenic Verses. Bratty and petulant, she cares little for being royalty.

Prince Daiski - Queen Susuma's son and Princess Haniya's half-brother. The result of an affair between Queen Susuma and a duke from a foreign country. Once murdered a scullery maid with his bare hands.

The Main Celebrations of Sina

The coronation days of all the queens are celebrated, though they may be more locally focused, usually most strongly celebrated in the towns named after them.

New Years - Unlike Breme, which has a calendar based on lunar movements, Sina has a set calendar codified by one of the previous rulers. This day is celebrated with lanterns, food, wine, and gambling.

Jubilee Day - Held shortly after New Years. After 10 years, a peasant may have their debts forgiven. Traditionally, people would meet to settle other business matters as well, or to reconcile with past enemies and friends. If any municipalities have deficits, the queen may visit and ceremonially forgive the debt.

Festival of Hydrangeas - Celebrated in mid-spring, when the hydrangeas begin to flower, and usually lasts about a week. Hydrangeas are beloved by the Sinan people thanks to their multicolored blooms. A tradition of hydrangea fortune-telling has sprung up around the country; it's believed that the intensity of the color, the exact bunchings, and the overall health of the flower can tell you things about your future. Hydrangea candies and teas are popular snacks.

Titheday - Essentially tax day, when people give their tithes to the queen or to the local authorities. It has come to be a celebration of sorts because people gather together to have their tithes counted, spurring spontaneous celebrations (probably to ease the stress of giving away their money).

The Miracle of Isthmus - One of the few "supernaturally" themed holidays, celebrating when Queen Alnan was saved from a shipwreck by the Suluk sea lion. People put on pageants throughout the country celebrating this feat, and "Sea Lion Dances" will wind through the streets of the larger cities.

Landing Day - Around the summer solstice. Celebrates when Queen Susuma landed on the continent. One of the best parts of this festival is kayak jousting, when hardy competitors will attempt to push one another off their boat using their oars.

Victors' Day - The time when soldiers join the army. They may join without compulsion or be pressed into service to pay off debts. Regardless of the reason, there are a few weeks of flurried recruitment before Victors' Day, when they are formally invited into the service. Military parades, speeches, and tearful goodbyes occur all across the country.

Rockfall Day - Celebrates one of the greatest victories of the Sinan army, when they crushed several Bremish cities with avalanches. It's common to drop paper-mache rocks filled with candies from high places, such as cliffs or tall buildings.

Darknight - Lunar eclipses are considered to be very unlucky. To counteract this, people will bank their fires high and stay up all night singing, banging pots, and drinking strong caffeinated beverages. It's assumed that you'll give your employees the next day off work unless they are essential workers, like guards or doctors.

Lullweek - Sina doesn't have many private schools or universities, but those that do exist operate all year round; however, there are a number of trade schools that operate on the same schedule. There is approximately two weeks between graduation of one class and entrance of the next class. During this fortnight, it's expected that students will get up to mischief and the townspeople will endure it.

Fire Festival - Sina does not really get all that cold in most of the areas away from the mountains, but they still celebrate the coldest, darkest time of the year. Extravagant presents, hot drinks, huge bonfires, and presentations by dancers dressed in scanty, filmy white tunics, shown as a sign of bravery.

[the-king-and-the-druidess]

Album: Merlin, by Dutch band Kayak; genre: progressive rock; 1981

I can't say that I fell in love with the music, it's too 80s, perhaps; but the lyrics, it's a lovely Arthurian poetry. Feeling very inspired by it. There are: Merlin-centirc, proto-mergana, two passionate gwencelot and one absolutely fabulous armor song that finishes the album and the legend.

The cycle follows the classic legends: Merlin is a prophet (interesting that the BBC writers chose to tie their Merlin and Morgana so close, passing his legendary seer ability to her), a King's enchanter and protector, and, in the end, a lonely madman in the Crystal Cave. He willingly self-fulfills the prophecy he has seen: he decides to let Uther indulge in his vicious love for Ygraine; it's just meant to be in order to let King Arthur came to this world.

"Bard of the unseen, I'm Merlin, the child of the light, my power can strike people blind, I'm Merlin, the sorcerer in the black robe."

Then it moves to Arthur and the Sword in the Stone. Merlin directs Arthur to his destined throne and promises greatness, peace and unity.

"Arthur holds Excalibur, the invincible weapon, to fight the wrong and serve the right, I know he'll make it happen."

However, just at this moment of light and hope, Merlin is aware the end already walks in their shadow. He knows about Arthur's past sin and his greatest forbidden love – his sister.

"There's a scar from his past which he'll bear till the end, like a curse it will last, his own blood wants revenge."

Afterward, the Album leaves Arthur to the knights and Grail, and tells a story of Merlin's tragic love and betrayal. Here we see how the BBC writers reworked the legends of Niniane/Viviane, these Morgana's incarnations, bringing them back to mergana narrative. Merlin teaches the Lady of his heart magic, and she turns this gift against him (we were deprived of this exact trope in the BBC, but The nightmare begins can count to an extent.) She even becomes a Seer instead of him.

"My future is yours, sweet lady of the lake (mind Morgana and Avalon), you betrayed me, stole my power (Morgana literally did it in TDOTD), when I put all my trust in you, could not see you through. (From S1 to S3). I'm buried alive, shut in this cave of darkness, there's no escape here from my grave, my skills can't save me (TDOTD-2) There's a reason that I'll never know, I couldn't follow why you had to go."

Kayak's Merlin cycle then moves back to Camelot and presents us with two perfect gwencelot songs, made from Lancelot's point of view. One can be understand as a courtly love, Arthur takes his next quest and Lancelot and Guinevere are left together;

"Now he's gone, is it wrong or selfish to stay? The magic returns wherever you call my name; tranquil but glowing, you're like a distant star, I'll show you my feelings now that we've come this far."

The other is a post-Camlann gwencelot, post Arthur, where Lancelot begs Gwen not to leave him. The strongest and bravest knight says that he needs his Queen's protection.

"Can't afford to lose, I couldn't live alone, I want you around, because I need your protection."

The darkness is drawing, Arthur is dying and Morgana comes to take him to Avalon. "Love's aglow" is a very beautiful duet with a strong but gentle Arthur's voice and Morgana's mysterious echo. Arthur's farewell forgiving song to the world. Every line is so profound and fitting for any version of armor. I like how Arthur's "take the blame, feel no (shame)pain" can either be "I take the blame, you, feel no pain" or "we take the blame, I feel no pain(dying)".

"There was a time I could freely breath the air

No matter where I went, you would always be there. Passion came, I could not defend myself from you. Did we dance and did we had the same dream of fame? Feel no pain.

Carry me when I feel so tired I would almost fall.

Finally losing the fight we'd hoped to win, climbing too high, too late to turn back and too far for cover, tell me

Did we touch and did we play the game; take the blame, feel no pain.

I can't believe the things you'd said, what happened to the dreams we'd had? A frozen heart; still deep inside, love's aglow. Now should we take it as it is. What lesson did we learn from this:

Though many dreams are lies untold, I see a world as pure as gold, out there.

And after everyone and everything is dead, only Merlin remains:

You'll move with the winds, and confide in the sea,

The madman of the forest, just a ghost of what you once have been. You're nothing but a wanderer obsessed by your dreams.

[strawberryfaced]

why life is fucking amazing and you should do things

(list for me and anyone else who sees this)

i actually find myself overwhelmed of all the things i want to do more than i am underwhelmed because i have nothing to do. and it’s actually a wonderful feeling because it’s like “wow. i have spent so many years of my life being bored when there is literally so much to do in this”. It’s like we’re all here already. so why not have some fun with it right!!! so here’s a list that backs up my thesis:

Crochet or sew something

Make a pop up card

Paint your nails

Make a new recipe or custom drink

Do yoga

Do a face mask

Do your hair and dress up

Make a diy gift

Meditate

Go outside (literally just go outside. I promise it’s more amazing than you think)

Lay on the floor

Design one of ur plain tshirts

Make a pot (pottery/ceramics)

Take pictures of urself because you are gorgeous and amazing

Clean the house

Learn a dance

Write poetry or a story

Make a song

Learn an instrument

Look at the sky

Bake a cake or a pastry or anything at all

Make an animation/film

Cut your nails

Go outside (again because I need to emphasise this one)

Read a book

Check in with a friend

Hug a tree

Go to the beach

Collect rocks and shells and sticks

Plant a flower

Research about something. Anything.

Make a video on a day in your life

Build a tree house or anything out of anything

Go on a bike ride

Go kayaking it’s actually so amazing

Go hiking (when u reach the top of the mountain just scream. Scream it feels sooo good)

Explore a place you’ve never been to

Zip lining

Bungee jumping

Go on a picnic

Learn sign language

Cut your hair

Paint a wall in your room

Rock climbing

(if anyone has any other ideas pls tell me!!!)