#justified anon

[my-castles-crumbling]

i had a weird situation with my best friend recently. we’re so close that people always asked us if we’re dating and it’s always “haha no.” but earlier this year my friend told me they like when people say that, and i said i do too. they told me they’ve had a crush on me for a while, and i said same and i wanted to kiss them. we didn’t that day, but we promised to talk about stuff before jumping into a relationship. anyway, i go on vacation and i’m pretty busy and don’t talk as much. when i come back, i invite them on a day trip and i’m really excited because i’m hoping to kiss them and maybe start something. but during the trip to our destination, they tell me about their coworker and asks me what i think of them. i had a bad feeling and tried to crack a joke about them, and then my friend told me the coworker asked them out, and they accepted. i was really really heartbroken ngl. but i tried to be really supportive and ask appropriate questions. the real thing that made me upset (tho i didn’t show it, i wouldn’t do that to my friend). is that my friend said they knew this relationship with the coworker was going to be short; they’d probably break up after a month. those were their words.

anyway after all this i still tried to be normal and patient but i felt like i was always saying the wrong things. we spent nearly everyday together for the next couple of months and my friend would snap at me sometimes and get frustrated with me. i tried to stay patient but i also gave them space and hung out with my other friends more, but i felt like that only made us grow distant. my friend eventually apologized for everything they did by “playing with my feelings” by saying they liked me before dating someone else. i didn’t want to show how much it affected me so i said i had no entitlement to them and everything between us was okay, i had no hard feelings.

it doesn’t really feel like it’s okay tho, they take days to respond to my texts and i just think we’re growing distant and i really don’t want to. i dont want to bring up the topic again because i was the one who originally said everything was fine and idk. i was wondering if you had advice on handling the situation? or even answering: am i justified in feeling hurt? bc i really had no entitlement over my friend.

thank you so much for your help 🙏

Hi!

I think you're justified in feeling hurt: not because you had any entitlement, but because it's clear that your friend was messing with your feelings a bit.

I think from here, even though you're a bit hesitant, you should say something like "things feel weird between us, is everything okay?" like don't bring up the actual incident right away, but if they're like "nahhh" then you can be like "ever since we last talked about xxx things have been weird, are you sure things are okay?"

And honestly, from there if they still say things are good, then it's not on you. You can't read minds or pull things out of people who don't want to talk, and they have to be willing to communicate, so if they aren't that's their fault, not yours <3

naming you justified anon!

[recreationaldivorce]

it is kind of crazy how often when i get back in touch with a transfem friend i haven't spoken to for a while she has to disclaim to me "btw if you hang out with me [group] will probably be mad at you jsyk". not saying it's unique to transmisogyny but anecdotally this kind of total social exclusion to the point of also excluding anyone who associates with the excluded, seems so frequently targeted at transfems. really dont understand how this kind of behaviour always comes from "progressives"/social justice types, like how can you do this to someone and think youre justified when every single person I know who's been subjected to this has been a transfem communist who has made big personal sacrifices in pursuit of liberation. like im not talking about nazis or right-wingers, even if your dispute with these girls had a legitimate basis the solution would obviously be mediation & talking to them about it bc these are all fundamentally reasonable and good people who are receptive to criticism...

[fatuismooches]

I have a terrible idea.

So we know how Dottore is kinda forgetful right? Like this man straight up forgot that he killed Krupp not even an hour later.

What if... 👉👈 his lover died and he sometimes forgot that happened?

So Dottore is just chilling, and remembers that he should be making his dear's next round of medications.

He goes through the motions, only to pause midway. Right... his lover is dead.

He throws out the half finished medications.

IF THIS IS TOO EVIL IM SORRY 😭 I JUST THOUGHT OF IT AND IVE BEEN DYING SINCE

It's not a secret that Dottore tends to throw himself into his work, especially when he's particularly excited about getting results. Now, it's still not unusual for the Harbinger to busy himself in his lab... only this time, it's to distract himself from his reality outside of work. He barely even talks to his segments anymore, leaving them to fulfill their respective duties, so he works from project to project. Working, working... although there are occasions when he pauses to wonder what he's doing.

How long has he been working? Ages by now probably, it seems like he lost track of time, as he always did. So much work... no breaks... speaking of breaks, he'd have thought you'd come to pester him to take one by now. That was odd. Quite peculiar, to be honest. Maybe you were caught up in your own interests? He'd have to indulge you in them soon. Speaking of strangeness, his foggy, sleep and food deprived mind realizes he's neglected to start concocting your new medicine! He clicks his tongue at his carelessness, this was of utmost importance! He despised seeing any day when your health was worse off - it was his duty to keep you stable.

Dottore gets to work gathering the necessary items for your meds, his shoulders relaxing a bit as he will see you soon. But then his face turns to a scowl as he realizes important ingredients hadn't been gathered. Why didn't he send an order out for them? That was wholly idiotic - he'd never forget something as important as that... there must have been a good reason... and so he rattles his overfilled brain to remember and then-

It's times like this when Dottore remembers it was his duty to you as Zandik to keep you happy and healthy, and he failed.

The segments ignore the crash from his quarters once again.

[mxtxfanatic]

Everyone keeps on saying that Lan Xichen may be an ignorant fool, but at least he is a good brother to Lan Wangji and a good friend to Jin Guangyao and Nie Mingjue, but is that really true?

Lan Xichen allowed the Lan Clan to participate in the First Siege of the Burial Mounds, after he knew of Lan Wangji’s feelings for Wei Wuxian. He even told Jin Guangyao of Lan Wangji’s feelings for Wei Wuxian, which Jin Guangyao later on used against Lan Wangji in Guanyin Temple.

And when Nie Mingjue told Lan Xichen about how he was stabbed by Jin Guangyao, he just ignored his warnings. Jin Guangyao doesn't even like Nie Mingjue either at that point, not to mention Nie Mingjue also wanted to kill Jin Guangyao several times too. And yet Lan Xichen still wanted the two of them to get along, knowing what had happened in between them.

What do you think about this?

Unfortunately, Lan Xichen has a type of smug, overconfident ignorance I like to call “mother knows best” syndrome: he thinks that he is the most rational person in a group of people who all seem (to him) to be operating at extremes, so it is up to him to play moderator and peacemaker as the “least biased” person. On top of that, because he thinks of himself as the “most rational” person, he also easily justifies disregarding the opinions or knowledge of others as “uninformed” if it doesn’t fit into his own view of things. And tbf, no one had ever challenged him on it in the story until Wei Wuxian’s resurrection. @jiangwanyinscatmom actually had a really good meta about how the story of the Twin Jades’ parents actually affect Lan Xichen’s ideas around reliability/rationality in regards to romances vs. friendships, but I’ve never approached it from that angle to be able to explain it as eloquently as they have.

What I will say is that as bad as those above character flaws are—and we see how badly they implode on him by the end of the novel—what makes it sad is that unlike other characters, Lan Xichen is actually trying to do right by his friends and family. He saw how close Nie Mingjue and Jin Guangyao were prior to Jin Guangyao’s betrayal and wanted them to regain that closeness. He saw how much Lan Wangji appeared to change around Wei Wuxian and encouraged that relationship until it seemed like Wei Wuxian was actually harming his brother, instead. In another setting, Lan Xichen’s ego could have just been addressed through actual conversation, but instead he got stuck with Jin Guangyao early on—who was the #1 driver of every bad thing that ever happened to Lan Xichen—and his refusal to accept anyone else’s input that differed from his own led to the deaths of real people. And now he has to live with that, but the good thing is that he does.

[tanadrin]

It's good that you're helping people in these rough political times to not give into despair, but at the same time you seriously oversell how much power and influence the average person has in democracy. The fact of the matter is that unless you yourself are an elected politician, or you're wealthy enough to lobby on behalf of your interests, the most power the average citizen has in any democracy today is to vote people into postions of power. There's absolutely nothing we can do to influence the direction the countey goes in past that beyond making a big enough stir with letters or protests to hopefully change our leaders' minds, assuming they're even willing to listen to us in the first place. This isn't to say it's completely pointless to call your congressperson, but you're only setting people up for disappointment and eventual depression by telling them they have more influence over their government than they really do. It's a huge reason why younger generations are becoming disillusioned with democracy as a whole; they were promised a level of power that never existed for people of their class.

What a stupid fucking thing to say. Of course the lone individual has a small effect on democracy. The reason you are exhorted to civic virtue is because the only way through the teeth of this coordination problem is, well, to coordinate--to get off your ass and find other like-minded people with which to cooperate so that you are not just one person acting alone, but one person acting as part of a larger group. And people seriously underestimate the barrier to entry in local or even statewide politics in the United States--it's a country of ~350 million people, but politics, even highly consequential politics, can be a matter of just a couple thousand (or even a couple hundred, depending on where you live) highly motivated individuals working in concert.

The exhortation to civic virtue and civic action is built around recognition of this fact. But if you sit on your ass at home all day waiting for someone else to act, waiting for someone else to come tell you what to do, nothing will ever get done. There have to be early movers, who are willing to translate their feelings about a situation into action, and you might as well be one of them.

There's absolutely nothing we can do to influence the direction the countey goes in past that beyond making a big enough stir with letters or protests to hopefully change our leaders' minds, assuming they're even willing to listen to us in the first place.

Wrong. You don't know what you're talking about. State house elections are run in districts of such a size that, if they are in an urban area, candidates can (and frequently do!) knock on the door of every single house in their district where someone who votes regularly lives. And state politics is enormously consequential, both in its own right and as a springboard to national politics.

you're only setting people up for disappointment and eventual depression by telling them they have more influence over their government than they really do. It's a huge reason why younger generations are becoming disillusioned with democracy as a whole; they were promised a level of power that never existed for people of their class.

You are an idiot whose brain has been cooked by doomerism and bottom-of-the-barrel pseudo-leftists regurgiating their own ideological vomit back and forth down each other's gullets. People like you are scum, crabs in the bucket dragging others down with you because you are stupid and scared and have never risked anything in your life.

Working-class people and minorities and women and trans people all get elected to public office in the United States; people with politics ranging from "normie centrist" to "literal Marxist" get elected to local and state government. And while some variables are outside your control (a popular incumbent well-known in their district is going to be hard to unseat!), many, many variables are within your control. And one of the biggest ones is are you willing to fucking try or not, you coward?

I have nothing but bottomless contempt for you, anon. The fact you try to couch your demand for surrender in the language of concern about the feelings of people who might be disappointed if they try and fail, only sharpens the disgust I feel. You are truly, genuinely a bad person.

[bixels]

it's crazy cause pharmercy debates still happen over that one image of mercy and pharah where pharah looks 7 for some reason even after the devs said that image isn't even canonical but no one who has these debates on whether it's problematic actually looks into the lore.

I can't even defend that because the lore is so spotty and inconsistent. Like, there's nothing I can say about their age difference because anything could be de-canonized.

[trans-axolotl]

so im going into therapy (or social work, more broadly) as a profession (in school rn). i know that not everyone in anti psych would support that, understandably, and im not under an illusion that therapy isnt tied to the whole system and process. but i want to bring a liberationist, anti-racist, pro-mad, and abolitionist ideology to help who i can

do you have any suggested resources or reading recommendations or idk any insight on how to inform the way i go about juggling anti psychiatry in a profession that is considered going hand in hand with it?

Hi anon.

I think there can be ways that people working in the psych system can leverage power and resources in a way where they're acting in solidarity with psych survivors and mad people, but in reality, this very rarely happens, even among professionals who identify as radical or as having lived experience.

Fundamentally, the psychiatric system is one that perpetuates structural violence, and in smaller and larger ways, anyone who works within the system to legitimize it contributes to and is complicit in that violence. So I think that for anyone who is planning to work within the system, you need to be upfront with yourself that there is harm occurring and that isn't something you can just ignore or act like that's something you're separate from. Even if you're not working inpatient or facilitating forced drugging of someone, there's still a lot of ways that therapists can be complicit in psychiatric violence.

One of the most obvious ways is through mandatory reporting. I believe that in order to be an ethical therapist you must break the law--mandatory reporting is a dangerous way that mad people are surveilled by the state, and therapists must work to interrupt that and prevent it. There are a lot of therapists out there already talking about practical ways to avoid mandatory reporting and how to be upfront with clients about it, and I can link some of that at the end of this post. I won't say it's always easy, but we have an obligation to each other to do everything we can to stop psych incarceration from happening.

I think there's a lot of ways that even outpatient, therapists are asked to enable other forms of psychiatric violence. Even if in your practice, you're really focusing on liberation, respecting autonomy, etc, there are ways that other psych professionals might try to get you to help them perpetuate different forms of harm. And because of your degree and licensure, there's this power imbalance between you and your client that means you do have the power to enable these kinds of harms. The degree next to your name means that you will always be believed over your client and that is a lot of power to hold. If you're working with a client with an eating disorder and their dietitian gives an ultimatum that they have to be hospitalized or they're refusing to provide care, what do you do? If your client's psychiatrist is refusing to answer questions or let them switch to other types of medications, what do you do? If your client is involved in a court case and you're getting subpoenaed for their medical records, what do you do? If your MSW program requires you to do one of your internships in an inpatient program, how do you prevent that from happening? There are a lot more examples I can think of, but these are just a few things I wanted to highlight for ways that therapy is still entangled in the larger system.

Another thing that feels important to me is to make the distinction between being a "good therapist" and helping people, because I don't think those things are the same. I see a lot of "radical" therapists get fixated on this idea that they need figure out ways to make the psych system run smoother, to improve access, to overall make the psych system better, and that this is the only way to help people. It's really important to be able to separate those ideas. For me, psych abolition is a project of building up our capacity to care for each other while destroying the systems that currently enact violence on us, and reformist ideas about expanding psychiatric systems, increasing funding, and legitimize psychiatric authority gets in the way of actually transforming care. I think in order to help people, you need to commit to being a "bad therapist" in the eyes of a capitalist healthcare system.

One recommendation I have is to read Franco Basaglia's writing and learn about his approach of the democratic psychiatry movement. As a psychiatrist, he saw his role as a way to disrupt the system and deinstitutionalize. He has this quote where he talks about how they weren't focused on eliminating problems, but rather on how deinstitutionalization would create more chaos and new problems--and how that created so much possibility for transformation. I think he's proof that there are certainly ways that psych professionals can act as accomplices who actually are in solidarity with psych survivors, but it's rare.

Last point I have is that although you gain something from professional training and licensure, there's also a lot you lose. MSW programs often don't actually teach you the skills you want to learn about how to actually support people--there's a lot you're going to have to learn from continuing education credits. From my friends who have gotten their MSW, I've heard a lot of complaints about how surface level a lot of information is, and also about how a lot of the way that information is taught reinforces hierarchal ideas and doesn't respect patient autonomy. I'll also say that gaining licensure oftentimes creates barriers for radical action--I've seen so many therapists who then become so attached to holding onto and not losing that licensure that they weigh it above mad people's lives. I've heard so many therapists say "Oh I can't speak up against restraint because I'll lose my job/I can't ignore mandatory reporting because I'll lose my license/etc etc etc." And I think that can be a really damaging mindset that harms your potential to actually help people. There are several therapists I know who are in the process of intentional de-licensure because of this, but regardless if you pursue that path or not, this is a mindset you need to be on guard against.

All that being said, I think there is a need for more abolitionist therapists who are able to help support our communities, both in terms of creating that space for individual support and on a collective level. There are ways that you can leverage your access to resources and the way you're seen as legitimate in the system to help advocate for people, get them support, and interfere with psych violence. I have a therapist comrade who keeps working in inpatient psychiatry specifically so that they can continue to sneak in banned materials to the ward, prevent illegal restraints, be involved in court proceedings as an advocate, connect people to mad liberation resources, let psych patients use their phone, document psychiatric abuse with the plan to fairly soon release that information as a whistleblower, and more that I'm not going to talk about publicly. They still grapple with the fact that they are currently perpetuating harm at the same time, but to them, it's worth it to be able to sabotage things in that way. And I think that there are ways that you can take the information you learn in your program that is actually useful and find ways to bring that directly to your communities, and that there is good you can. I just think you have to be very intentional and aware of what it takes to actually do that, rather than just staying complacent with the label of being a "radical therapist" without doing anything to make that true.

For resources--here's my psych abolition drive with a lot of different zines, books, workbooks on different psych abolition topics. I really would recommend reading Psychiatry Inside Out by Franco Basaglia as an example of successful psychiatric resistance.

I would also suggest checking out Mutual Aid/Self Social therapy--the people who created this project are trusted comrades of mine, have both gotten their MSW or LMFT, and they have a lot of helpful insight into how to navigate things like avoiding mandatory reporting, de-licensure, etc. They have a discord server and also have regular online MAST meetings to train people on what MAST is and how to set up a MAST collective.

Genuinely wishing you the best of luck through school and appreciate that you're actively thinking about these things.

[dykedvonte]

did you see the article wrong organ tweet abt an interview with the lead writer —>

https://t.co/5dcfeePkz3

The article really should honestly be read by people who try to make any of the characters actions black or white and ignore the other themes in the game. It specifically mentions these aspects that people try to make seem undebatable or uninterpretive and makes sure to use wording to say it can stem from multiple things and never confirm or deny anything.

I do remind people that the interviewer does not work for Wrong Organ so I am only using quotes and paraphrased statements rather than their own deductions as those should be taken with the same grain of salt of an analysis you see on twitter or tumblr and even my blog. They are still a subjective eye compared to Kasurinen’s direct statements.

Particularly pointing out that Jimmy, while deplorable, is still supposed to complex and his actions are not fueled by some comically sick amusement. And that Curly’s actions are not just rooted in one thing and not just rooted in rape culture but also include other social and systemic factors besides the shallow idea he’s just dick riding for his friends. It’s meant to be interpretative and I need to point out that the main writer says that “good intentions mean nothing when it’s gotten that bad”. A lot of people like to think Curly was only acting with intentions for himself or Jimmy when it’s was a misguided attempt at overall peace that ultimately failed and whatever processes behind that are to be nitpicked, not if he was acting out or malice or disregard.

I wish more was talked about specifically with Anya, Daisuke and Swansea but I understand why they weren’t as Curly’s actions/inactions pre-crash and Jimmy’s actions throughout all segments are the main impactful forces in the game. People should really read it for themselves but sit on this quote directly from the main writer:

[welcome-to-green-hills]

A clip of Director Rockwell recruiting the boys has been shown on TV; I love how as Sonic goes on his rant after Rockwell calls them aliens, Tails looks personally offended while Knuckles simply looks annoyed

ASDFGHJKL! Yeah, they went through a whole spectrum of emotions ❤️😂❤️

Although, Sonic (and others) has a right to be offended. He has been in earth longer than Knuckles and Tails. It’s his home planet 😊

[kelocitta]

There is currently a rather large discussion ongoing about the RW fandom behavior, drama, etc. I am not going to talk about the specifics of whats happened for a number of reasons. But what I do want to say is that if at any point you've harassed people over it, whether that be through anon asks or public posts- you did nothing but damage the ability for people to correctly process what is happening. You contributed nothing but harm to an already delicate situation. It does not matter what "side" you were on and I will not tolerate further interaction with me or my work if I found out you did such. If you let your personal hate for anyone boil over into threats, wishes for long term harm and petty comments meant to contribute nothing but slander or mental distress for the individuals involved who were already distressed (or acting irrationally) you did nothing but make it harder for people to process their emotions, thoughts and behaviors constructively. Regardless of who you think was in the right, who fucked up, whatever. It doesn't matter if they deserved it, or earned it, or if its an eye for an eye. Its difficult enough as it is to think clearly when presented with any kind of stressful situation and heckling people does nothing but make it worse and harder for them to explain themself in any capacity. I don't want you anywhere near me if you think that is an acceptable way to act.

[apollos-olives]

if you're gonna vote for biden i hate you but also you don't have to tell me ! i don't want to hear you try to justify why you reaaaaaally want to vote for the genocider actually. cuz maybe i actually don't care and maybe i'm trying to survive as a palestinian rn. have you considered.. idk... maybe NOT thinking about yourselves for the love of god? have you considered keeping your mouth shut and not telling palestinians that ur gonna vote for their genocide?? you can stay silent! for free!!!

[aclockworkreader]

How do you feel about the romanticized age gaps in fruits basket? Also I appreciate your videos so much, sending lots of love

kureno and uotani are a crime. first of all because she’s a child and second of all because she’s a lesbian. her and hanajima are literally in love and no one can convince me otherwise.

tohru’s parents are obviously the worst crime of all and i didn’t even know how old she was (or that she was his student 🤢) until after i finished it because i don’t think they ever explicitly say it in the show? i think they were trying to rewrite that to modernize it a bit because literally wtf

shigure and akito are something else because with the amount of trauma and fucked up shit going on there, that age difference might be the least of their problems

that show is genuinely reads like horror to me. and there are plot points you have to rewrite in your head sometimes. it’s a romance, so it can be silly and fun. but mostly it’s traumatic and dark and weird and i love it 🍙

[moeblob]

As an attempt at a polite "going forward" comment...

I do not plan to draw for Three Houses or Hopes for a long while. I know a lot of my followers are from the past four years and I appreciate that you followed me at all! But if you are only interested in the art of those characters I wanted to be clear and say you can unfollow me at any point if what i draw no longer aligns with what you want to see.

I might draw for other FEs (like Heroes or 13/14/17) but I do not want to get involved with 3H any more. I do have other interests and across tumblr, twitter (now inactive), and sometimes on discord I've heard enough "I thought it was (FE3H character)".

This is not one person doing it and it is not simply one character being mistaken. I simply want to distance myself from 3H and have unfollowed a few people that reblog art of it because it just leaves a lingering bad taste in my mouth.

Thank you very much for your time and I hope you can find artists who can provide art for topics you like.

[genericpuff]

Its from a while back (262) because i prefer to kill my brain all at once, but WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH HER SHIRT. That is a SQUARE. It was like this in multiple panels too

What's even funnier / weirder is why are they wearing the shirts in the first place?

1.) Eros and Psyche seem to be completely isolated in the prison, even if Apollo or Leto forced them to wear them they should be able to just remove them if they really don't want to be wearing them as soon as they're unsupervised.

2.) Who's gonna see them wearing the shirts? It's not like they were forced to do some "Apollo 4 King" video on TikTok to make it seem like they were aligning with Apollo, they're deadass just sitting in a prison cell wearing these shirts for seemingly no one and nothing but Apollo's entertainment?

3.) Love how we're just gonna pretend that Apollo's original campaign wasn't "Apollo for President". Love that for him that he finally figured out he lives in a monarchy and not a democracy.

[oifaaa]

Have you played arkham knights yet? Been watching Jason's part and I kinda like it

Yep played it for the first time I think a year ago and absolutely adored it from start to finish funniest thing was I was wearing my fit bit and I noticed when I was playing the section where jasons chasing you in like a giant crusher my heartbeat was going 135bpm

[aithusarosekiller]

keep your jegulily shit the FUCK out of the jily tag. nobody wants to see your pro-fascist mental illness. YOU ARE NOT WELCOME IN OUR SPACE FUCK OFF

I didn't want to reply to this but...

Lesson in etiquette: being aggressive and accusatory will NEVER get anyone to listen to you :) If you were polite I may have listened but now you're just throwing around LARGE accusations and extremely immature language that demonises real issues such as mental illness and bigotry, which will never make anybody like you or trust you.

I tag jily because jily is in the content! They are 1/3 of the ship so tagging them is logical and reasonable. If you don't like it you can block me or block the jegulily tag :) you don't EVER have an excuse to hide your face and come onto somebody else's account spitting vitriol and hatred over fake characters from a CHILDRENS BOOK

Next: stop equating fictional characters to real issues because it's disgusting and you're minimising real loss of life and suffering so you can make a point. I don't blame you for hiding your name because that's a pretty gross thing to do! People who have lost loved ones to events like the holocaust have begged you lot to stop equating their real trauma to made up characters so you can feel better than other people. And mental illness is also a real issue that you are making out to be trivial and laughable. You sound like so many real bigots I know when you imply that someone you don't like existing must mean mental illness. If only you put this much energy into real issues! Your priorities are clear.

(A little off topic but it's also pretty interesting how it's never the Jegulus fans that get angry at me for correctly tagging content, yet people always portray them as the evil ones?)