#just thinking about all the ways s2 is going to increase my love for this story

[heartstopperthoughts]

[tabithatwo]

What do you think about the scene in ep1 where Shauna masturbates on her daughters bed while looking at pictures of her boyfriend? Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but I found it disturbingly similar to younger Shauna sleeping with Jackie's boyfriend

Oh hey, so this response is like perhaps over a year late but someone else asked me about this and I remembered I had 3/4 of this response drafted so hi I’m here now lmao

Anon, I do NOT think you’re overthinking this scene. I actually think there is so much room to think about this scene that a thesis could be written on it. It’s so layered and an incredibly bold choice on the show’s part to include it. It is our introduction to adult Shauna, and I think that the creators of the show clearly felt that it was very important.

This scene made me so uncomfortable as a first time casual viewer that I actually tried to rationalize it away. I remember saying aloud to the person I was watching with “No, that has to be her own childhood bedroom, right? She must be, like, visiting her aging parents?” Clearly I was ignoring the very ridiculous set design of Callie’s room entirely lol, but my mind wanted to find a different explanation. And it took me a while to come around to really loving Shauna as a first time viewer of the show, in part due to how much that scene shocked me.

All that to say, it is absolutely reasonable to find yourself very uncomfortable when thinking about that scene, as many people say that they do when they’re proclaiming that they wish it didn’t exist in the show. But I don’t think that means the scene should be ignored by any means. That discomfort is the point of the scene. Shauna is such a fascinating character, because she swings back and forth from shockingly depraved and cruel, to heartbreakingly kind and loving. She draws both the audience AND the other characters into this unpredictable back and forth with her, and it is easy for us AND them to forget what she is truly capable of when she is in one of her sweeter moments. That is what makes her one of the most fascinating characters of all time to me.

Okay, now we can get into my personal interpretation of this scene. I have always felt it was about Jackie. I think that was clear early on, but, after s2 aired, having more information about Shauna’s relationship with Callie did impact my interpretation of the scene and solidify some suspicions I had.

Shauna clearly does not see Callie as her daughter in any traditional sense. She tells Lottie as much, that she never could fully believe Callie was real and hers. And we see, with increasing clarity as the show goes on, that Shauna views Callie as a peer more than anything. Shauna has both stunted development and difficulty expressing affection. We see her tell Callie that it would’ve been easier if she HAD just had sex with the cop. That’s a very strong indicator of their dynamic. Shauna just doesn’t have the capacity to mother Callie.

That is important context because, with the scene in Callie’s bedroom, Shauna is recreating the thing she used to do when she was young and Jackie was alive. I don’t think she is even thinking about the fact that it’s her daughter’s boyfriend or bedroom, because she doesn’t even really think of Callie as her daughter much of the time. It’s so complex and muddled and, you guessed it, uncomfortable!

In my opinion, people are NOT ready for the intricacies of the ways Callie is a Jackie proxy for Shauna to be developed further. Like the show is establishing it pretty heavily, and I think in a very compelling way, but if it goes down that road more explicitly I have a feeling that people are not going to be able to separate the WAYS in which Shauna sees Jackie in her, if that makes sense.

I think s2 did have some compelling threads of this. Shauna caring for the Jackie corpse doll and getting frustrated and “hurting” her with the ear coming off scene. Shauna not being able to protect her, initiating and endorsing the consumption of her, then hinting at having fears that she’d hurt the baby when she was pregnant, losing the baby, worrying that they’d do to the baby what they did to Jackie, twisting it so much that she can’t help but believe they ate the baby too.

She associated the baby with Jackie very heavily. And in doing so, I think she parentified herself to Jackie in a really fascinating way, like Jackie was her first failure.

If she couldn’t care properly for Jackie, who loved her so much (and became an actual martyr and saint to her), and she couldn’t care for her children who were absolute innocents, then she must be the epitome of horrible and she should squash those caring instincts bc clearly they aren’t actually Good, type shit. That’s how I feel like Shauna spirals into her destructive behavior.

So what happens here, imo, is that Shauna doesn’t really see any of her relationships clearly. I don’t think she consciously thinks of Jackie as The Girl She Was In Love With, and I don’t think she consciously thinks of Callie as her daughter most of the time. Shauna just thinks of them both as people she has loved and failed, as well as people who piss her the fuck off and make her feel trapped in a life she doesn’t want.

She sees a lot of Jackie in Callie, and she acts out in really horrifying ways throughout the entire show to try and gain control, and this scene is one of them. Shauna has always used sex as a way to reclaim control, even when it is absolutely insanely inappropriate, and often when it isn’t at all about actual pleasure. We see more of this in s2, when she BRINGS JEFF TO THE ART STUDIO OF THE MAN SHE KILLED AND FUCKS HIM THERE (that was fucking INSANELY risky and destructive). With masturbating on Callie’s bed, looking at a pic of her bf, Shauna is acting from the same place she was when taking Jeff from Jackie in a way, and I get why that’s uncomfortable to watch. It makes me incredibly uncomfortable, it is SUPPOSED to!

But I think that we are viewing it with so much more logic and thought than Shauna is capable of applying. We draw conclusions from it that are based on a sane person, and Shauna is far from that. I think Shauna is briefly recreating multiple feelings and motivations that drove her to sleep with Jeff as a teenager. The sexual side of things is so wholly Jackie driven, she is constantly seeking ways to feel the way she felt when she was creating that proxy sexual connection with Jackie that she verbatim discusses with Jeff (which is so crazy btw not over that scene). But the side that relates to Callie is driven purely by the frustration and anger. Again, I don’t think Shauna has consciously thought about ANY of it, but if I had to interpret the driving emotions, then I think those would be the most likely.

And I think what it says about Shauna is that she is not living in reality in the slightest. You can not overstate the lack of conscious thought that goes into her actions when she does these things. She is acting on pure impulse, and without any certainty that anything is actually real.

She breaks my heart and this convo about the masturbation scene is so interesting to me because YEAH, that was a ROUGH introduction! and it took me rewatches to allow myself to dig into her character and that’s the point tbh.

On instinct, people either see the actions clearly and hate her, or obscure them to the point of forgetting they happened and love her. But it’s much harder to reckon with them and dig in and come out still loving her.

(I truly can’t believe I have to say this, but I was recently introduced to the fact that yj incest shippers exist, so disclaimer: this is NOT meant to be taken as a romantic or sexual interpretation of Shauna and Callie’s relationship at all. In fact, when I say that I don’t think people are ready for detangling the WAYS in which Shauna sees Jackie in Callie this is exactly what I mean. I just assumed people would wrongly assume it was That and be horrified. I didn’t consider the opposite, and I would like to continue not considering the opposite, so I will prob block anyone who engages with this in that way simply bc I do not want to see it and this is my social media lol)

[amalthiaph]

I took an interest in The Bad Batch around the tailend of S2. It's not news to Tumblr that I almost slept on this show. And I cannot thank Caleb Dume enough for being the reason why I pressed the play button for this one. While I haven't been around for most of its active run, and I wish I had been, the last year has been among the best months of my life.

This show challenged my morals, and taught me lessons that I will forever take with me.

Tech taught me to embrace and take pride in who I am. I now think that I am not something that needs to be cured. I needed to be understood and accepted. He taught me that we deserved to be loved and be allowed to live the way we want to (as long as we are not causing harm to ourselves or to others).

Hunter taught me that at the end of the day, we're all still humans. We make mistakes. We fail. But we can learn from them, and we can strive to be better. And I should also take care of my hair bec I cannot accept that a man in a galactic war have better hair than me (Okay, did you honestly think I'm gonna be serious this entire essay?)

Crosshair taught me that at the end of the day, we really are still humans. Sometimes, we make choices that not everyone will understand or agree to. Sometimes, we don't even understand our own choices. But we can learn from them, and we can strive to be better. And that I should also go to therapy bec istg my hand shakes like hell I always need to rely on a pen stabilizer when doing my artworks.

Wrecker taught me that in this world where we can be anything, always choose to be kind. He is a great man who would always be there for everyone, and I hope that one day, I can be that person too. He is afraid of heights, but he climbs and go on high places anyway. Like him, I should also start conquering my fears. Dear Wrecker, I did try conquering my fear of heights last March 9 but I can't. I will try again.

Echo taught me to always fight for the greater good. Almost two years ago, me and a group of people campaigned for a great tomorrow. With pink flags and pink balloons, we worked on our little thing I like to call our rebellion. Sadly, we lost. At times, I am thinking of just giving up bec that's democracy and I cannot go against the people's decision, but characters like Echo and the rest of Rogue One taught me that nothing should ever stop me for fighting for the people's rights and that my love for my fellow citizens should always come first before hatred.

And lastly, Omega taught me to be curious, or more likely to not be ashamed for being curious. Learn about the world. Learn about lots of things. We never know when we need it. While I could say be good at strategy and win 30 grand on card games, nahhh, I'm not that smart.

I also learned to reevalutate myself as an artist. This show taught me integrity. I had ranted about this lately but these characters challenged me in terms of art. I knew that the creators aren't best at proper representation. While I could draw them as they are in the show, I choose to stand for what is right, and represent them as properly as my skills could. In the more technical side, I became good at drawing armors. And this little Actors AU Draw Series taught me to be responsible; I tried my very best to create and post them on time. This increased my productivity.

But enough about me.

There's something I realized two nights ago; we, the fandom, are Bad Batchers ourselves. We can consider ourselves a family, but not one of us is the same and we're all interesting, and capable in our own unique ways. We can have our own opinion and stand about something and still coexist. Like our favorite charactera, we embrace and celebrate our differences.

This show may end. No more Bad Batch Eves, no more cryptic tweets that cause us to hyperventilate, no more Bad Batch Wednesdays but it will live on, through us.

I know there will be a day where we decrease in number, one by one, little by little, but still, the show will live on through our actions, our opinions, our choices we make after May 1, 2024 because I know that all of us were changed in some ways by these characters and this show.

To the crew, your cryptic tweets caused me sleepless nights, but thank you so, so much. It is through your hardwork that we had this wonderful show. Thank you for making every second of the past year so worthwhile and enjoyable for me and for everyone.

However this show will end, whether happy or sad, I am glad it happened. However short my time was with them, I am happy I had been here. However short my time with everyone in the fandom was or if some of you leave one day, still, thank you so much for being part of my life; I am so happy I met all of you.

To Clone Force 99, thank you. I've never loved anything like this before. May the Force be with you.

[anon-s-s-k]

Alright, so I finished Good Omens S2 about a month ago, and my god! What a season! But I'm not here to give a review of the show actually.

While watching the show, I noticed something about Crowley (because I'll never not notice Crowley, or David Tennant for that matter :p but anyway), specifically about Crowley's eyes.

So this is the one right after his fall. His eyes are so yellow. Like, majority of his eyes are yellow here.

However, I noticed that later in the show the yellow in his eyes got reduced.

Ngl, initially I thought it was just a continuity mistake. But then again, with how much detail-oriented Good Omens is, I thought I should go back and give it a look again, properly this time.

Upon looking at it again, I realised the reduction of the yellow part in his eyes is shown over time. So I thought, oh! Maybe they are trying to show how with time Crowley has gone more human-like.

But then, I noticed something else.

During the bookshop fire scene, Crowley's eyes are almost entirely yellow again. And this got me to theorize my new theory about it. Please bear with me on this one.

So it's already established that Crowley had normal eyes before he became a demon, and the fact that his eyes signify his "demonness?".

Now, my theory is that the reduction of the yellow parts and the increased white parts of his eyes signifies everything good in him, including his love for Aziraphale and the influence Aziraphale has on him. Initially he had so much yellow in his eyes because he had little to no influence of Aziraphale on him. But over the course of time, Aziraphale kept on growing on Crowley in a way that kept reducing the demonic influence on him, and the yellow in his eyes. But when, during the bookshop scene, Crowley thought he lost Aziraphale for real, the rage and grief elevated the demonic influences again, which is why, I think, his eyes are majorly yellow again. But when he realised that Aziraphale wasn't gone, the yellow in his eyes reduced again.

And then they elevate again in the Bentley on fire scene,

But reduces immediately after he saw Aziraphale again on the airbase (even though the Bentley burnt down to the ground in front of his eyes).

This is entirely my theory and just something I noticed and thought what could have happened. I'm not sure if it has been stated before or if it is already official, or there's another canon fact about Crowley's eyes. It's just my thoughts, and if I'm wrong please forgive me.

Also if Crowley shows up in season 3 with entirely yellow eyes, signifying that everything good in him is gone, trust me I won't feel better about myself for predicting it beforehand, not at all. Not even a little bit.

Crowley's eye gif from this post.

Rest from Pinterest.

Peace x

[percheduphere]

I'm kinda curious, especially since a lot of people have very different views on this: How do you think Loki and Mobius would be in an actual, official, romantic relationship? I kinda think they would keep doing what they're doing but I don't really know what level of romantic stuff they would do. They're already pretty physically affectionate, but would they do that in public since both of 'em are pretty secretive about their normal emotion? They compliment each other but would they use things like honey and dear in a serious way? Etc. So...How do you think this time couple would be like?

I adore this ask because all my headcanons about Loki and Mobius being in an established relationship are SOFT. The best part is, canon supports this.

While I do agree that Loki and Mobius's dynamic will continue the way it has been, I also think a certain level of emotional intensity will be brought into the mix, increasing their general chemistry in front of others ten-fold. The banter, the idea spit-balling, the lack of personal space, the smiles, laughs, and long gazes ... imagine all of that dialed up. Loki loves as hard as he hates and is a hedonistic show off. Mobius has loved Loki since Day 1 and repressed his feelings for long enough. Are they really going to be reserved around each other once they're securely in a relationship?

No! They will be the most sickeningly lovey-dovey couple in the MCU.

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION

S1 had Mobius advocating for and complimenting Loki in private and in front of others. S2 had Loki reciprocating. It is not hard to imagine them becoming fiercely protective of one another on and off the field. Cross one, the other is crossed. They are a two-package deal, and both are vicious when it comes to wielding words on behalf of the other's dignity.

As for terms of endearment, I can imagine Loki calling Mobius "Darling" on spare, particularly emotional occasions. Mobius, on the other hand, still has Don in him. "Sweetheart" and "Honey" are very in-character pet names he would use. Both reserve usage of these names in private as Loki hates blushing in front of others, though Mobius has a tendency to slip when he's multitasking at work.

PHYSICAL TOUCH

The hug in S1E5 seems to have opened the door for physical affection come S2E1. Loki and Mobius (especially Mobius) touch one another with affection, attentiveness, and protectiveness on instinct. Despite not being romantically involved in S2, they move around one another the way two lovers in a small kitchen might. Once in a relationship, they will continue to do this but certain gestures will hold more meaning, in particular: holding hands.

One of Mobius's first gestures of kindness, which Loki initial rejected, was a handshake in S1E1.

The second time Mobius offers his hand, Loki takes it and uses Mobius's compassion as an opportunity to steal the time twister from his pocket.

Mobius offers another handshake in S1E5, which Loki declines in favor of a heartfelt embrace that he extends to Mobius and Mobius happily accepts.

Physically (and symbolically), Loki and Mobius's relationship was founded on Mobius extending a hand and Loki refusing it, betraying it, and finally taking it. I therefore see them holding hands regularly, every day, because holding onto one another is grounding, comforting, and reminds them of these earlier moments in their relationship that they've overcome together.

As these two are not shy about tight embraces in public, I doubt either would feel shy about chaste kisses either. They are so in-sync and adoring of another that it goes without saying that when they have sex, they make love passionately. They communicate with touching just as much as words, so heteronormative "bottom and top" designations are thrown out the window and into the dumpster (where they belong). How they have sex conveys how they feel about one another in that specific moment.

PDA

Among others, I can see them being nauseatingly sweet. We already know what bystanders look like when they tease and bicker with one another:

And make no mistake that Loki would up the dramatics with PDA just to gross Thor out. Thor making a "barfing gesture" cracks Loki up every time, and Mobius, resigned, goes along with it because who doesn't want to get peppered with kisses?

QUALITY TIME

I haven't seen anyone point this out yet, but it's hilarious to me that S2E3 starts in broad daylight and cuts to evening by the time Loki and Mobius stroll out with cracker jacks in their hands.

Loki looks a little annoyed but he is going along with it for Mobius's sake. Sightseeing at the World's Fair makes Mobius happy, and whatever makes Mobius happy, Loki will indulge even if he's not interested. Like that key lime pie he didn't eat.

If this is their relationship when it's platonic, then be ready for Mobius to take date night very seriously.

Dinner and a night at the opera? Naturally.

Eating pastries and drinking coffee while people-watching in Paris? Absolutely.

Biking side-by-side along the Dutch Coastal Route in the Netherlands? Of course!

Mobius will take care of all the planning and Loki will enjoy sharing new experiences together. On (frequent) occasion, Mobius will surprise Loki by choosing an activity he knows Loki will enjoy, such as visiting an ancient library or perusing fine clothes at a bazaar.

Point being, these two have always enjoyed each other's company and have fun together. In a relationship, they will actively take time out of their schedule to bond more purposefully!

ACTS OF SERVICE

Both Loki and Mobius are strong when it comes to communicating love through acts of service. Where Mobius is a little higher on words of affirmation, I believe Loki is slightly higher here. Loki pays attention to Mobius's interests, habits, and creature comforts. He will commit to memory the exact way Mobius prefers his steaks, sandwiches, salads, and coffee prepared.

Mobius, for his part, will take care of things Loki doesn't like doing. Taking out the garbage? Done. Washing the car and filling it with gas? Did it while you were asleep. Filling out paperwork? Say no more.

Sadly, I don't think either of them have a talent for cooking. Loki grew up with palace servants. Mobius relied on the TVA cafeteria. They will attempt to conquer the kitchen together, but the end result is always either a fire or a flood. It's okay. Loki can name Mobius's top 5 take-out places off the top of his head.

GIFTS

Neither Loki nor Mobius strike me as big on gifts, but when they feel the sentiment, they give one another meaningful things that only they understand.

I think Mobius may be slightly more inclined for gift-giving. He knows what material objects mean most to Loki and why. Loki, meanwhile, might feel challenged in this area. Not for a lack of enthusiasm, mind, but because Mobius doesn't have many material desires beyond a jet ski. Loki would like to think he's more creative than getting Mobius a new one once a year.

In short, Loki and Mobius already engage in the 5 love languages. Being together will only strengthen what they do for one another, much to their friends' longsuffering annoyance.

[formyloveoflove]

Characters I Would've Liked to See More than the Faks in S3

I learned too fak'ing much about that family in S3. I loved the Faks in S2. Their increased screentime felt like an over-compensation. Much of the comedy that I loved in S1 came from the staff interactions. The feeling of an ensemble was truly missed for me.

But without further ado and in no particular order-

1. Marcus

Marcus Brooks, I am so sorry that the writers didn't give your story the necessary space it truly needed. You were the only child of a single mother, and you watched her die. I wish we could've seen more of your grief. The little glimpses we saw - your eulogy speech, the way you were inspired to make a dish to honor her, and your thinking about legacy - were so beautiful, but it felt like it had no place to breathe.

The glossing over this tragic loss, the fumbling of showcasing Black Catholic influences (sidenote: did you know that Chicago is home to the biggest African American Catholic population), and the diminishing of his grief were some lows of the season. I would've loved to see more of Marcus dealing with the loss of a parent because no matter how "prepared" you are, that shit will knock you off your feet.

2. Sweeps

If we needed a break from the melancholy of the main plot, I would've loved to see Mr. Gary “Sweeps” Woods go to wine school. It could've been in clips, similar to Tina going to culinary school in S2. Some comedic slip-ups, or maybe somebody else recognized him from his baseball days, or maybe he messed around and got too drunk. Better yet: he and some fellow sommelier get drunk. We've seen this character for three seasons, and we barely see him.

I did enjoy his monologue in Legacy and thought it was very fitting.

3. Manny and Angel

I remember seeing them for a split second in the 30-minute montage S3 E3 "Doors." They are truly the unsung heroes, and it would be good to see them for some comic relief. Maybe they're pranksters? Maybe they could've been the reason the teaspoons and forks were missing. Or maybe they could've been tasked with counting how many come through.

What's their dynamic? What are their personalities? Three seasons, and they feel like cameos.

4. Thee Adamus

One of the things that I wanted from S3 was some more Sydney's mom, and while I was delighted to see she has her mom as her lock screen, I wanted more. I love Syd's dynamic with her Dad whose unyielding support can come off a little worrisome to his baby girl. But Dreamer! Daughter x Practical! Father hits close to home for me. And the Adamus have a healthier relationship with loss and grief, and I want to know more about that process.

When I say more of the Adamus, I mean I want to see why and how Sydney became Sydney. I wanted to see their family dynamics. Why does Syd like to cook? Why is Syd avoidant?

Plus, this was a season about mothers, goshdarnit. More mother content, please.

5. Ebra

Ebra is so funny to me. Like I'm begging on my knees for more Ebra content. He's so cryptic and genuine in a way that only older Black men sharing snapshots of their trauma are. In S1, he's very attentive when it comes to the younger staff members, like when he was sensitive to Marcus gaining confidence in his skills and when he read Sydney's review for the whole kitchen to see.

One of my critiques of S2 was that they just let Ebra fall by the waistside. They didn't fully commit to his journey to accepting change as an older professional. This season, we barely got him at all. I would've had him at least show up to Syd's party. Maybe even via Facetime with the camera all up his nose because he doesn't understand the mechanics just yet.

[theriverbeyond]

wrt arcane s2a1: i dont think its totally out of character for vi to become an enforcer. she's emotionally driven and revenge focused - all she knows is to punch. in s1act3 she was the one trying to convince the council to go infiltrate the underground with hextech and kill silco, while other councilmembers talked about negotiating. when jayce accidentally killed a child, she barely felt bad abt it bc that child "knew what he was signing up for". she tunnelvisions hard emotionally.

I guess, but (#spoilers) generally it's not the *violence* that I feel is out of character, it's how quickly she changed her mind after explicitly rejecting the badge due to her, yknow, repeated lifelong traumatic experiences with that institution (which she mentioned! the writers made sure we all knew that that trauma matters to her). but then a random enforcer fangirls over her and she gets drunk w a stranger, then suddenly she's ready to gas the Undercity? feels weird, honestly! I feel like her principles and also her trauma would not be so easily swayed. now, if the writers had put the 20 minute 4k CaitVi sex scene in there instead,

but anyway, when she tried to kill Silco in s1 that was very much a like... vigilante thing, and very importantly, Jace is Topside but he's NOT and has never actually been an enforcer. again, my characterization critique is not that she wants revenge, it's how she's going about it. in s2, Vi wanting to kill Jinx and feeling like It Is Her Responsibility to end things makes sense, her resorting to violence makes sense, her leading with violence makes sense. her invading the undercity with a badge and a strike team of masked, uniformed officers dressed exactly like the people who killed her parents is uhhhHHHHh.

anyway! I actually really ENJOY the way her joining the enforcers massively increases the emotional weight of later being rejected by Caitlyn in the worst way possible -- when Cait hits her with her gun like she's just an animal, it hits harder because it is a larger betrayal. like, Vi is essencially offered the bait of *thinking* she's being accepted/given higher standing only for it to be revealed that when the chips are down, she will always be treated like Undercity scum. and that's really compelling on an emotional level!! that was my favorite part of the entire act, because I love the emotional weight it hits with and I love the opportunity for character exploration and growth it allows for in act 2 and 3, i just feel.....iffy on the character choices made to get us here, basically.

[okkos-ferrum]

Unorganized helluva boss apology tour rant cuz I think I'm going crazy

Disclaimer, cuz I know helluva fans can get defensive: A lot of this is probably my subjective opinion. I'll state my tldr as my actual objective piece of criticism, but otherwise my gripes throughout this could be based on my tastes and expectations. I genuinely don't want to take away anyone's enjoyment of this show nor hate on anyone involved, so if u just want to enjoy helluva, totally skip this :]

I think I'll actually have to give my hot take here and criticize this episode, because everyone has given way too much praise for an episode I think - in the long run - hurts the show

Im not gonna even bother organizing my thoughts I'm just gonna rant, but to start, i think the decision to start the ep right after full moon chronologically wasn't the best move. The full moon episode cliffhanger was an impactful scene and a dramatic way to start the rift between stolas and blitzo. It's where the dam of two-ish seasons finally breaks, where to me, stolas and blitzo have already said everything needed to be said, at least at the emotional maturity they currently are at. Any changes in said conversation about their relationship would require growth from both separately in order to foster a healthy discussion.

So to undercut that tension by IMMIEDTLY having blitzo somehow wiggle his way back into stolas's private property to have both double down on their stance diminishes the weight new moon's finale had. The conversation, while it does add further clarity, feels repetitive and emotionally taxing to watch, because the show has literally zero scenes of either of them reflecting on the previous night. So it's just them starting up the same fight with the same talking points we already know.

Yeah, maybe it is in character for blitzo to demand a conversation after new moon, but it shouldn't have been the path the show took. It should've allowed the story to stew in the feelings brought out in new moon, both in a narrative and meta sense by taking a break from stolatiz.

Cuz honestly I'm a bit drained of it atm. The show sells itself on the premise of blitzo being a "boss" (a hell of a bos-) and him working with imp. But all of s2 has had this obsession with stolatiz ever since the popularity of ozzie's (for good reason that episode was amazing and one of my personal favs still).

Just abt half the eps in s2 carry an emotional weight around the stolitz relationship. (where s1 has stolitz is make out sessions and the occasional threat to their life, s2 takes it up to actual life or death situations and full backstories) . This increased tension and focus draws away from the intial episodic format to become a more serialized (and imo) melodrama abt the status of the stolitz relationship. Rather than concern itself over any of the imp characters and their emotions, helluva has made all of its emotional beats and stakes throughtout the whole season relate to stoltiz in some way (or it's parallel with fizz and Ozzie in ep 7).

To return back to the ep, I also take issue with its writing of verosika. I will admit that this could be subjective, as my partner, who loves verosika and was worried abt her writing going into the ep, enjoyed how the ep integrated her. But idk, I think it is so lame that an ep like full moon, which is marketed to be abt stolitz, is fine wasting its time writing the cherubs for 90% of the episode, while can't bother making verosika a larger character in her own ep.

Like she's a SINGER, but no she's back up for STOLAS'S SONG this ep. And it's not stolas's hasn't had the chance to sing love ballads before, he's got plenty. But no, the host of the party can't even be a duet to stolas, she's gotta be back up. Like it couldve been a way stronger connection between these two if they sang a duet, rather than the show AGAIN prioritizing verbalizing stolas's emotions again.

We get a full flashback to blitzo's relationship with both fizz and stolas, but nothing on his other significant relationship??? Just a line or two of how it went down and that's it??

Side tangent: It gets on my nerves how so many people are realizing now that verosika is not a bad person. Like it's clear from even in her intro ep in s1 ep 3 she's angry rightfully for how blitzo screwed her over. But now that she actually is being nice and forgiving to stolas and blitzo respectively, now she has earned the fandom's respect??? Like the amt of comments of "Oh wow, verosika isn't a villain, she's an anatognist" drives me insane

Like to me, this ep should've stepped away from stolas directly, and focus on blitzo and verosika. Have blitzo go back to ignoring his feelings by jumping back head first into business, now with the asmodeous crystal. Then bump into verosika somehow. However it may happen, verosika and blitzo, either angrily or calmly, reflect on their own past relationship at the end, which might have blitzo making a realization of how he is repeating his past mistakes. Use the episodic format to slowly allow blitzo to mature so the next time he meets stolas, he won't just double down like he did in the beginning of the ep.

I think, personally, the decision to have verosika host the anti blitzo party diminishes her as a character. It chooses to again define her by how blitzo hurt her, rather than touching on the other underdeveloped parts of her character. She has shown to be very petty yes, but to go through all this effort seems too much, since she is a pop star and should have better things to do.

Maybe explore how she, a succubus, who is meant to have primarily sexual relationships, goes abt on her day to day as a celebrity who went to rehab. Or her relationship with maybe knowing barbie. Or the other ways to explore the set ups for her in ep 3. But no, she plays second fiddle to her second focus ep for the stoltiz drama. But yeah sure, let's have full moon be abt the cherubs.

On a final and likely my most pettiest point, this ep made me cringe a lot. I'm sorry, this is very subjective of me, but I need to say it. So much of this ep felt like fanfic. Always hammering in how "he's a prince and you're an imp" kind of deal. Stolas getting overly drunk after taking a swig of one drink to have blitzo handle him being drunk. The million puppy dog eyes by blitzo, like it felt too pitying. The rushed pacing felt like a result of this indulgent kind of writing, where it priotizes creating the cute shipping scenes before thinking about the actual plot and its effect later on. Again, just my taste tho

Alright I think I ranted enough but ...

Tl;dr: Apology tour messes up the pacing and focus of the show by continously centering itself around the stolitz drama rather than allowing time to reflect by themselves

[haikyuu-and-more-haikyuu]

Volleyball update!!!

I have completely forgotten about updating my progress! Just came to think about it today and though I give a word from myself.

So volleyball is still fun. A lot of fun. I always look so much forwards to practice. It's so fun for me and our new coach is also very engaged with the team.

In last update, I think I told you guys that I had moved teams and got to play setter. Well, I have the infamous knee problems that comes with volley and needed to step down on the practice amount...so no official setter on the team here haha. Like, I struggled up the stairs in the worst of it. Felt like an old woman, so I had to cut down on practice and needed to stat building the strength and stability up again. But now, they are much better and doesn't hurt too much. Of course, I get the pain her ache here and there, but at least I can function normally.

But I still love playing setter. It's an hard position to learn, but it's a very rewarding thing at the same time. My backwards sets are also very accurate now. I still struggle with knowing exactly the height and position like I do with regular sets-...but the only way to get better at it, is just pass backwards sets.

Since I'm a lot more comfortable on the court now, I get to play around a lot. I can dump, I can set back or forwards or I can run up and pretend that I'm setting; only to spike it over the net in the same jump. It's a lot of fun.

It' very fun when I manages to fool the other team, but it's very fun when my team also get tricked by me just playing around. It's also very fun that I can try out new things and it doesn't affect my team negatively. Like we are only practicing, but just the feel of confidence on the court is world changing for me. Like, I'm not scared to try out new things just for the heck of it.

When we just play normal rotation, I have become a lot more comfortable with feints too and can read the block better to work my way around it. I have even managed to time my attack too, so I don't spike when the block is at the highest reach! I'm also getting better at a spike in the back (before the three meter mark). But when I'm not playing setter or we only play with normal rotation- the others aren't too comfortable setting to the back, so I don't get to do it too often.

Also, not to sound like the biggest weeb here (but I run a HQ blog so...) but I do kind of understand Kyotani in S2 when he said he got restless when he didn't get to spike the ball. I get like that too when I haven't touched the ball for a few rallies and then when it comes my way- I get so excited and just wants it it and I often mess up. I'm such a kid really.

I do still want to increase my vertical jump, so I can get better at both hitting but also blocking. That is a department I'm lacking. It's like I have all the technique down, I just lack the vertical reach I want.

I can also get better at pancake and digs. Sometimes I time it perfectly, but I'm often a little bit to late. So I do want to get a lot better at it, since even as a setter- you can get hard passes that just needs to get up.

My servers are very stable now. When I fail a serve, I always know the reason. Either I didn't throw it high enough or I didn't hit it correctly. I can always managed to fix it when it's my turn again. I want to try the jump serve or even a floater. Fun fact; I did actually managed float serve with underhand serve when I could only do that. I was known for my underhand serves for a while there in competition. Don't let anyone tell you that they can't be useful and cool.

There was also one time, we played mix and I was going to set the ball- and I came under the ball wrong and like all of my bones just cracked. They stopped the game and wondered if I broke something. I didn't, but they were sprained. Nothing that some sports tape can't fix. Seriously though, they were messed up for a few months because I still played. So take care of ya bones, peeps. Message from me <3

My team is mixed with a few people that have some experience and some that have been a few years out of the sport. So we focus a lot on getting the team dynamic down, but to be completely honest- the team is not that close. Some players have quit and new ones have come. And the feeling of the team is a little more detached (in a way). It's kind of sad, since we were such a close group before. I try to be a positive source, but it's hard when the team itself doesn't really come along like we have in the past. There have recently started a new girl, and the two of us play together well and it's nice with someone fresh that also just want to enjoy practice and doesn't freeze people out.

I did try some beach volley in the summer. We have a lot of beach courts in my city. Once even just five minutes away. I'm still not used to it. I keep thinking on digging the ball, but I can't slide and I just knock the breath out of my system. I'm a little scared to do the spike approach, because I have a weak left ankle after breaking it too times and uneven surfaces are my enemy. Not preferred, but it's a lot of fun still. I do still learn a lot from it. Really, I can understand why the sand volleyball players (and hinata) becomes so good at receives. Because, with sand volley- you do need to be where the ball is to make it easier for you and your partner.

Anyway, that was that. I still love the sport and if it was up to me- I would play it every day. Like, I played volleyball for like five or six hours once (no wonder I have knee problems) but I can go on forever I people want to play with me.

(me when my volleyball mates doesn't want to play for another three hours)

[greenleaf4stuff]

Do you think guilt will make Durin pull away from Elrond now? I can see him feeling guilty for not being there in person/dwarves not getting there in time to save Eregion. And because Elrond seems to wear his heart on his sleeve, clearly loves fiercely and shows emotions more openly than other elves, in my opinion, it would be out of character for him to not be depressed/traumatised after the battle and probably exhausted and not taking care of himself properly. Which would increase Durin's guilt. And then Elrond wouldn't blame him and be really nice about it all but that would again just increase the guilt.

Hi anon! :) Sorry I needed a few days to answer this!

Oh, good question - I think guilt could potentially play into how Elrond and Durin interact in the future, but I think it will be part of a whole cocktail of emotions and experiences those two will have to deal with after s2, both on their own and towards one another. They both had a pretty Bad Time this season.

Further thoughts below the cut:

Durin had to argue with and defy his own father, which - considering he is the king - had consequences not just for himself. There was the whole issue with the ring. And then the Balrog happened and Durin lost his father. And instead of being able to take the time to mourn, now both he and his brother claim the throne for themselves, leaving Khazad-dûm more vulnerable.

Elrond fought to defend Eregion, lost a lot of elves in the battle - comrades, friends. Lost his will to fight for a moment. Almost lost Galadriel multiple times. Lost Celebrimbor. The battle. Eregion, Galadriel's ring. Saw the uruk burn Celebrimbor's scrolls. And during one of his lowest moments gave up hope Durin's dwarves would arrive, and they did indeed not quite make it in time, but they came.

So yeah, I think if we take all of this into account, those two are left with a myriad of feelings they will have to work through and problems they have to face now. S3 might see Elrond be focused on Rivendell, while Durin has to face his own problems Khazad-dûm. It might leave them precious little time to deal with their recent losses, and even less to reach out towards each other and (re)connect. Esp considering they need to focus on their own people and that Sauron is out there with the nine rings and an army of uruk.

They both had a difficult time being there for each other, with all that was happening in s2. So yes, guilt might play into it a bit, but I think there is a lot more than that which might play into their relationship going forward.

I personally hope they understand each other well enough to know they are both in a difficult spot - the way they both handled the mithril situation in S1 gives me a lot of hope in that regard -, but we'll see where the story takes us.

[raayllum]

I know you like to analyze thematically in TDP a lot and you write top down the same way, so I’m curious, what are some of the themes/motifs in your upcoming novels? and do any of them coincide with TDP?

(GASP you get a gold star oh my god thank you!! and i will try to not make this too Long but i'm very excited!!)

Basic premise for ppl who have never heard of my novels before:

Latest generation of a reincarnated group of chosen ones have to grow up in a world of increasing violence and political instability that they're supposed to fix while also facing their own choices and demons. The main character, Ally, starts off as an 'unchosen one' — she lost her powers as a young child and has been trying to get them back, which kinda makes her resent her chosen one friends just as much as she loves them. The other two co-leads are her twin sister, a former child soldier with death powers she doesn't want, and her friend / one sided rival, a draconic-powered prodigy looking for redemption and to escape her past.

The funny thing is that when I was writing out my series (2014-2017 has all the pieces we currently have, though things have ofc been finessed since then) only ATLA existed as an inspiration point, which was, "How do you always know the Avatar is going to be a good person (and what if you didn't? What if they weren't)?" + "what if there was more than one running around?"

The rest was all from my head. There's a mystical magical heart broken into pieces. A continent divided in two with a long history of war. Characters anchored to the idea of Autonomy who then go through a loss of powers arc (hi Callum s2) and then brainwashing/possession arc (hi arc 2 Callum) that was probably by far the funniest coincidence. Circles and cycles and children and choices. The fact that these all just also found their way into TDP shows just how much it feels like the show was Made For Me in the best way creatively, and one of the reasons I think I've found TDP so personally rewarding to analyze—happy coincidences all around.

There's other coming-of-age themes of course that are shared between the two—grief, identity, friendship—but being prose I get to lean more into religious and political worldbuilding in much more detail.

I think my novel(s) are also more grey and angsty (especially later on) than TDP was at the start, too. A good chunk of my protagonists don't have any moral reservations about assassinations or killing/torturing people push come to shove while also still wanting and trying to be Good People, but that just makes the ethical dilemmas more interesting to explore. That said, everything is ultimately more Hopepunk, I just prefer to never pull punches on the way there

Motifs I like to use:

a tarot inspired in-universe version of chess for foreshadowing purposes

stage motif (who are you when you're performing for everyone around you / constantly fronting?)

birds / ravens

wolves

knives

eyes / the ouroboros (snake eating its own tail)

Themes: gods vs monsters (vs humanity), complex family and friend dynamics, living vs survival, grief and cycles, loss of sense of self, idolization and scapegoating as two sides of dehumanization, etc.

I also wanted to have unique power sets (Moon is one of my favourites with leaning into shadow magic and being able to make things temporarily out of moonlight, or Life not just being all fuzzy plants and animals and showing more of the well, brutality of being alive).

People have said my main protag is basically if Claudia and Rayla were the same person and yeah that's a fair assessment, Unfortunately for her.

I feel like I blabbed enough here but if you want more info on writing things from a top-down approach / what it's like to build from theme first I'd love to talk about it more in relation to TDP (and also my books, mayhaps!)

[clementineofmine]

For the ask game :)

Same Weird Family (the series): 1, 4, 5, & 9

Thanks, @assaily, for the ask! I'm going to answer this based on Same Weird Family, the first in the series because I haven't gotten to talk about that one yet. It's the first fic I wrote (that you know of, lol) so while I now find parts of it a bit rough, it'll always be near and dear to me as it came about due to a visceral need to word vomit about these characters.

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

I started this fic a few weeks after S2, and like many I was absolutely inspired by the absolute savagery and increasing desperation of Five in that season. From killing the board to rewinding time, Five did so much for his family that season and none of them knew about it. Plus, the season ended in a new timeline, so the "what's going to happen next?" opportunities were almost endless.

I was also deeply inspired by those who took a stab at post S2 before me, including but definitely not limited to NonLinear Theory for Dummies, The Walls Kept Tumbling Down, Creeping Towards Extinction, and Tangled in the Hanging Tree. If you haven't read these and you like my fic, you're going to love these. They are all angsty and excellent.

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

I'm gonna call out Allison here, because while she didn't get a lot of focus in this fic, I think she deserves a chance to yell at her brothers more often.

“Well, if we can’t take him to the hospital-” Allison’s words returned them to the practical matters. She looked around as Diego and Luther both shook their heads at her as confirmation. Vanya looked torn but didn’t disagree. Klaus remained focused on Five. “-we’ll have to watch him. We’ll take shifts.” “Oh boy, Five’ll just love that,” Diego scoffed. “He’s unconscious. He’ll deal,” Allison pointed out, closing the discussion. She finished cleaning up Five’s injuries and straightened his clothes. “And if you guys are done with playing pissing contest,“ she gave a pointed look to both Diego and Luther, “you can help me get him upstairs to the bedroom."

5: What part was hardest to write?

Chapters 1-6 and part of 7 came at me fast and furious, but I floundered a bit trying to get through 7 and 8 to the end. I think the writing is a bit awkward and it does make me cringe a bit.

9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

Not alternate versions so much as I did a lot of rewriting (I'm a pantser; I try to let my characters speak and sometimes they surprise me)

If you'll permit me to tag onto your ask, I'd also like to answer 3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

I spent a lot of time dissecting Five's internal emotions during this fic, trying to make sense of what drives Five - the anger and frustration and desperation that we saw on screen in S2, and beyond. I'm quite proud of some of it. Here's a snip:

“FIVE!” The shout cleaved him violently from his thoughts. Five blinked, confused, and looked up. His mind registered that his name had possibly been said more than once.  Oh, he remembered, almost absently. His siblings were pestering him.  Five sighed. All of the energy that had once fueled his rage was gone, drained away as quickly as it had spiraled up. Anger merely simmered now, rather than burned. He no longer felt dizzy, just…tired. In the clarity of hindsight, Five knew he hadn’t ever really been angry at his siblings. Annoyed, sure. Frustrated. But anger was reserved for the fact that Luther and Diego’s questions dragged things out of the little box, things that snagged and pulled at the cracks and exposed his weakness. For the memory of the light fading out of Klaus’s eyes, reaching for Five but still dead before he hit the ground. For the way that Vanya’s body crumpled like a discarded paper doll. Mostly, Five’s anger was directed at himself. For being played, and not figuring out the only possible end to the Handler’s deal until it was much too late. If he had been thinking clearly. If he only… Stop, Five. There’s no good destination down that road. “Five, we just want to help you” the soft voice said. He still didn’t care to pick out its owner. It didn’t matter. He couldn’t bear to keep listening. His siblings had died because of him. Again. And everything that happened afterwards – his survival, his thoughts, his actions – he could give them everything and still would never be enough to make it up to them. Never. 

fic ask game

[heliza24]

I have really enjoyed reading your analyses of the YR sex scenes. Thank you so much for putting it in writing!

I have a question I think you might be perfect to answer. The cinematography of s2 is obviously really different to s1 and I don't think it's only the new team they brought in. There is a lot more 'shakyness' in the hand held cameras, there is a lot of going in and out of focus, a certain blurryness that underlines the plot.

One scene that really sticks out to me is the kiss in 2.4. As you already mentioned, we don't get to see Simon's face, the angle during the kiss is also a little off, the focus is on Simon's hands, on Wille's shoulder, but never on their lips. What do you make of that?

I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Hi there! I'm so glad you have been enjoying the analysis posts, and thank you so much for this question!

I have seen some speculation that the increase in handheld photography/shifts in focus constitutes a mistake or indicate that the camera team in season 2 was less talented than season 1. I don't think that's true, for a few reasons. First, that just isn't how TV works. Every scene is shot multiple times, from multiple angles. If the directors didn't like how something looked on the monitors on set, they would just do another take. And the editors and directors have all of those mulitiple takes to choose from when compiling the final edit, so they're going to pick the shots that they like the most, from an acting and also camera perspective. So if they're including a rack focus or shaky shot that's an intentional inclusion.

Second, while there may be an increase in this technique in season 2, it is already an established part of the show's film language in season 1. Specifically, hand held shots are used to convey heightened emotions.

I went back and watched the first kiss scene in 1.2, because I wanted to compare it to the kiss in 2.4 since you mentioned that in your question. There's three significant camera things going on in the 1.2 kiss in my mind. The first is the POV shots, where we look directly into Wilhelm and Simon's faces like we are the characters. This feels very stylized and deliberate. This technique actually appears in season 2 as well! Think about that moment in the party in 2.1, when the boys see each other and they're backlit by the swirling party lights. So not everything in season 2 is cinema verite; there are intentional moments of framing, slow motion, etc.

Going back to the kiss in 1.2: there's a wide shot, where you can see both Wilhelm and Simon in profile. This shot feels removed and uncomfortable, and it captures the anxiety that Simon is feeling when he's not sure if Wilhelm is going to return the kiss/his feelings. But then Wilhelm pulls him back in, and he does return the kiss and the feelings, and the camera becomes much more fluid as we're looking over Simon's shoulder as he kisses Wilhelm. As soon as the emotions swell, the camera becomes reactive, moving along with the characters. This happens in other scenes in season 1, like in the fish scene in 2.5 which I discussed in the last post.

With that in mind, I'd like to propose that the more hand held camera work is a deliberate choice used to convey heightened emotions in the Young Royals universe. And season 2 has much more heightened, strong emotions than season 1. The stakes are higher than the first season, and even when the boys aren't together they are always feeling intense emotions about each other. The kiss in 2.4 is one of the zeniths of that frustration and desire. There's a desperation in their reunion, and I think the way the camera comes in so close and switches focus adds to that. It's the third person in the kiss: breathless, excited, not sure what to focus on because it wants to feel all of the things at once.

This is also extremely nitpicky, but I think the reason that their lips are sometimes out of focus is because they're not the visual anchor of the scene. Their noses/forehead are the first things that touch, and I think the camera prioritizes keeping the focus on that part of their faces through the scene. Not that their noses are perfectly clear the entire time, because of what I mentioned above. But I did want to point out that just because they're kissing, that doesn't mean that their lips are by default the most important things in the frame.

As you mentioned, I do wish that they had included more Simon coverage in the run up to the kiss. But I think the decision to keep the camera on Wilhelm was a probably deliberate choice to center his reaction in that moment.

The other way the hand held camera works super well in season 2 is capturing movement, and sometimes a combination of movement and intense emotions, like when Simon completely whiffs Wilhelm with the ball in gym class earlier in 2.4 (this is possibly my favorite 30 seconds in season 2; righteously angry Simon is one of my favorite Simons). There are wide establishing shots that are pretty stable and set up the layout of the game they're playing, interspersed with more hand held closeups on Simon that capture his anger and the effort with which he throws the ball.

I think the choice to increase the amount of hand held work in season 2 really works. It highlights the intensity of what our characters are feelings and breaks down the distance between character and viewer. Obviously your mileage may vary depending on what kind of style you like, but I do think this was an intentional and well crafted part of the season.

[stevie-petey]

hello i wanted to say this earlier when you were talking about the wiritng of duffer brothers and specifically how they will likely be bringing back the love triangle again and i just wanted to add how it feels like a step back for all three of them! i felt like nancy breaking up with steve was important for both of them, for steve to realise that he needs to do some serious introspection and let go of the life that he knows is fake, and for nancy it feels doubly important to not attempt to stick with something just because it was there in the past, and instead allow herself to move on from a stage she feels complete with and move onto what she really wants (johnathan), even if it's unconventional! and then for johnathan it felt like the more classic, someone is choosing me when i am not usually chosen moment. i honestly, truly, wouldn't even be that mad if they break jancy up, just because, y'know they're like 19-20, and it's okay for nancy to decide she wants to explore things outside of hawkins and it's pretty normal for most people, and would strengthen that "moving on" theme they were able to capture in s2, but if she goes back to steve.............hmmmm. feels unfair thematically for steve to go back to a person he dated during a specific period of his life he wants to get away from, feels unsatisfying for nancy wheeler to be delegated to Love Interest TM (as u mentioned) AGAIN, and feels bad for johnathan because omg why??!!?!? would u do that to a character whose already lost a lot of the importance and relevance that he used to have???? remember when he used to be the main character (not to mention they literally cut out his new friend argyle for the hell of it). idk i feel like after s2 they just stopped caring about a lot of these core characters and there are so many moments i could point to and be like hey guys nice regressing you did there.

my apologies, this is getting really wrong, but you mentioned that you like themes and i LOVE your themes it's very cathartic. i am excited for s3 to see character themes continue because i understand ur working with the show itself here but it immediately upset me when they made, like, russian soldiers, the main villain of the season. i felt like we had developed two very good seasons exploring the US's ability to use its citizen's bodies, especially women and girls' bodies, in its war for imperial power, and were doing some good digging at the crux of the cold war, with the upside down and its monsters making up great metaphors for the war crimes and unnatural horrors it's willing to unleash onto people as long as the government and military benefits, with brenner and the scientists and the labs all representing this part of the government. and then we get "russian communists are bad".......right......and i'm sure you believe that....... i understand that they needed like a new villain, but i think it would have been better for them to continue that thematic critique they had established already. like, the base being in the lab is perfect! wow! what an immediate link to capitalism and consumerism in reaganamics and the ways it is designed to hypnotise you to spend your money and feed the economy that thrives on unethical practices and can only exist if it has a population hooked into the addiction of product consumption that in turn provides the economics to increase the empire. DO SOMETHING WITH THAT, GODDAMIT. The mindflayer even mind controls people which fits so well into this theme but they insisted on having the russians be the human villains of the show and it blew it so bad for me :(. i don't know exactly what they should have done, but i think maybe even having a portal open to the upside down because of all the artificial-ness of the mall mixed with the constant ads trying to convince (ie control) people to bye stuff mixing with hawkins freakiness would have been more fulfilling for me. obviously i know you won't be doing anything like that but i'm excited to get some relief through character relationships from this huge problem i have with the duffer brothers.

yeaaaaah u can def tell the show was going a bit haywire once season 3 released BUT the seasons vibes were immaculate u cannot argue with that. however yeah its wack how they brought up some cool villains and powers and then just. dropped it. do we know what happened to all those flayed people ???

as for jonathans character just becoming less and less important as the seasons go on ,,,, i grieve that every day. he deserves so much better in that aspect. and nancy !!! and steve !!!! like the love triangle pisses me OFF !!!!

as for ur russian rant imma be real i followed a bit of it but my brain is so sleepy and im not a history buff but ur SO real and valid for all that. i think the russians were fun but apparently everyone hates them ??? wild. i also have poor media literacy but thats not important rn

[stormblessed95]

I am a hyper rational, analytical person and because I'm super analytical I've also always had an innate ability to read people...I know everyone says that but I genuinely can. It's actually a running joke within my friend circle.

That said I want to just explain my journey into BTS and into this side of the fandom...So

I became a BTS fan right when Serendipity dropped. I was first obsessed with Jimin's beauty, voice, dancing, and then I fell in love with the group. I binged watched everything within a few weeks time and I distinctly remember the moment I went "hmm" regarding JM's and JKs interactions. I was watching AHL and there was something about JK's interactions in particular with JM that just tickled my spidery senses. It was his eyes...I can't describe it...it was just in his eyes whenever he looked t JM that made me go "hmm." From the Hanbok scene to the car scenes (when they cleaned airplanes). He also always followed so closely behind him. However, he was incredibly young during AHL, and I didn't know much about them still so I didn't really think too much about it.

However, the more I watched that "hmm" became stronger. There were two of JM & JK's video logs that increased my suspicion and again it came down to JK's eyes. There was one where JM was adjusting his hat and swiped his hand through his hair and JK just froze and then averted his eyes. It was super quick and subtle and I've literally never heard anyone in the fandom bring it up, but it caught my eye as my second "hmmm" moment. That said the more in the fandom I got the more I learned or was led to believe that, that was just JK. He was attentive to all members that way. However, no matter how hard I tried to see what everyone else was saying I didn't see it. Yes, Jk is a starer but I'm a starer and the way I stare at someone I like versus someone I'm supporting is completely different. But I still passively accepted the narrative.

The sort of straw that broke the camels back for me, at least regarding JK being at the very least physically attracted to JM was DNA comeback stage and Countdown. During Comeback stage "No Silver Spoon" performance JM lifts up his shirt to reveal his abs and JK whips his head around to see it...now as an analytical person I wanted to see if this was part of the routine and while it wasn't necessarily standard there were a few previous occasions in which JK did the "same" thing...the only difference this time was that JK almost missed his mark and kind of got lost in staring. That was a pretty big "HMM" for me but not as big as the countdown video where each member was asked what their favorite album song was. During this entire live, JK was zoned out...looked bored or tired. He stood far away from the camera. However, when JM was asked the question JK was fully attentive, even tried to move closer, and when JM sang a part of Serendipity "Geunyang geunyang" JK look like he melted...and he rubbed the back of his neck (nervously) and was so lost in staring at JM that it appeared that Suga had to bring him back to reality. To many that would have been very minor but it literally cemented my initial thoughts that JK was genuinely attracted to JM.

After that I watched every Vlive, interview, Bon Voyage, Run BTS, Bangtan BOMB etc. and

BV S1: "I want to share a bed with JM" comments from JK...in one of the episodes (behind the scenes) the members are standing on an escalator and JK spots a poster of what appears to be couple back hugging each other and JK blurts out something along the lines of "I wish I could be that way with my friend." The members (JM wasn't there) all start teasing him saying I'm your friend you can do that with me and JK shrugs them off and walks away quickly embarrassed....now that doesn't mean he was talking about JM it just made me go...hmmm

BV S2: footsies, bashful looks at each other...it was this season that actually cemented my belief that the attraction was mutual.

JKs Graduation car video when he started singing to JM that song about you were there when I first took off my uniform and JM got flustered and changed the subject.

The degree to which younger JK teased JM but then said " I only do it because I like you too much" and JM's facial expression fell (doesn't in itself prove anything but together it shows a bigger picture), he also was very specific about why he would date someone like JM--mentioning his beautiful eyes

The way JK would always find a way to bring JM's name into the convo: There was a RUN episode they went bungee jumping and the camera man asked JK what was the most exciting part of the day and JK said "trying to make JM say stop" or something like that. He had just done a thrilling activity that he loved but he chose that!?!?

The list goes on and on...

I was fairly convinced they were romantically involved within less then a month of finding out about BTS. This was without me ever watching a single fan made video. All original content. I didn't know what shipping was at the time either.

I went from 80% certain they were more than friends to like 99.9999% certain when I woke up to GCF Tokyo....I couldn't have been more certain after that. It was that video that made me lookup and see if anyone else was certain that they were a couple and I found this fandom and also learned about haters and the mass amount of people that get upset if you even think they are together. I genuinely didn't think it would be contested with how overtly romantic GCF Tokyo was but to my surprise it was more than rejected.

The level of denial actually made me very upset...because I didn't see how one could come to any other conclusion. People saying it was fan service...I researched what that meant and was even more shocked that fans could think GCFT was fan service.

I even looked into other "plausible" ships and I didn't get the same INTENSE sense that I got almost day one from Jikook. Like I saw chemistry in other ships and I wouldn't call their interactions fan service but I didn't feel romance or actual attraction. The same way I view JM in VM is how I view 99% of of other ships...super close friends tht have buttery eyes for each other but like buttery friendship eyes LOL.

I keep harping on the eyes because every emotion can be seen and read in someone's eyes...and JK has the most expressive face I've ever seen. That boy cannot hide a single emotion. His looks of admiration, anxiety, impress, love, attraction...you cn see it all. JM while still not too difficult to read...he's nowhere near as facially expressive and vulnerable as JK.

I don't just look at jikooks actions I look at everything and how they interact with each other is so different then how they interact with other members. They could do the same thing with another member and it feels and looks different then when tehy do it with each other. Their romantic chemistry is palpable.

Well sorry for the loooong behind rant. I am a lurker and no one really knows that I exist in this space...these are just thoughts I've held onto for a while and just wanted to release them. Also, if I have errors...apologies I wrote this all from memory...my memory of 2017.

Thank you for sharing your story! I really enjoyed it! Everyone make sure you are streaming Vibe too!!

[septemberrie]

Rivusa Recs: FitzTragedy

I have to thank @fitztragedy for so much beauty and joy that has entered my life since March of 2021 when I peeked into the Rivusa tag on tumblr and found my fandom fam. Your birthday gift this year is a rec list of all my favorite of your works! 

Val and I often have different tastes in genres, but she’s taught me that the stakes don’t have to be literal life and death to be interesting or dramatic or discerning. Val’s stories excel in the quiet moments, the dialogue, the intimacies; it’s chasing after your lover in the pouring rain, it’s waking up next to someone with a stunning realization, it’s your friends having your back while also encouraging you out of your comfort zone (sound familiar? Because of Val I flew halfway around the world to meet up with friends that I met because of Rivusa, because of Val).

Love you, Val! Without further ado, here are my faves:

✨Smoking Hot (collab with @gossipqueen2000) Word Count: 6k Tags: Rivusa, side Skloom, firefighter AU, humor Summary: “AFD! Open the door!” “AFD?” “…Fire department!” “….STRIPPERS!” Rec: I think the summary captures this delightful romp quite well. Mo and Val managed to craft the story of a drunken bachelorette party WITHOUT turning all the fairies into annoying caricatures of themselves. The party’s aftermath features the Specialists as firefighters, Riven and Sky up to single guy shenanigans, led by an increasingly wearied Saul wearied by their antics. This story is an instant pick-me-up.

✨An Innocent Trust Exercise Word Count: 11k Tags: Rivusa, forced proximity, smut Summary: In order to teach the fairies and Specialists to trust and learn from each other, Farah and Saul create a school-wide exercise: fairy & Specialist partners will be literally tied up for a week. Rec: Written in the beginnings of the FTWS fandom, this fic cemented for me how much Val doesn’t let ideas go once they’re in her head. Expect fun banter, steamy smut, and worldbuilding crack treated seriously. Val takes a great premise and totally delivers. Fave exchange: 

“Can’t sleep with your face this close.” 

“Too distracting?”

“I just don’t wanna have nightmares.”

✨The Most Powerful Mind Fairy in Alfea Word Count: 5k (WIP) Tags: Rivusa, pre-breakup Samusa, mind fairy stuff, S2 missing scene Summary: In Season 2, Ep 4, Rosalind calls Musa “the most powerful mind fairy here.” Missing scenes that slot into canon to explain Rosalind’s opinion. Rec: This rec is a bit personal; S2 left me reeling with where a lot of characters ended up and I had a hard time feeling creative about it, but then Val swept in and dropped this fic shortly after the premiere. I love how dark Val took this one, not shying away from Rosalind using torture to weed out the students she wanted to groom. Read for a great way to fill in the gaps S2 left us with.

✨Tolerable Word Count: 9k Tags: Rivusa, kink meme prompt, arranged marriage, dubious consent (sorta) Summary:  In order to recruit the best specialists to fight in their army and protect the Queen, Solaria promises certain qualified candidates an arranged marriage to a powerful fairy that will increase their social status and income. Riven wants to prove to his father that he can make it on his own, regardless of whether the mind fairy he's paired with wants to marry him or not. All he has to do is get her pregnant to seal the deal. Rec: I’m actually a huge sucker for arranged marriage, and apparently I also have a thing for exploring sex: is it a tool for control? for whose control? or for intimacy? What even is intimacy? I love the exploration of what healthy sex is, with a dash of insane kinky worldbuilding.

✨Thin Walls (collab with @theperfectrose) Word Count: 37k Tags: Rivusa, Modern/Non-Magical AU, And They Were Roommates, Smut Summary: Musa is in desperate need of a roommate. Riven is available. Only problem is their apartment walls are very thin. Rec: Look, I have to include Val’s magnum opus. I love that in every universe, in every timeline, not only will Rivusa get together, but Val will be there writing about it--featuring snappy banter, unrequited pining (until it’s requited ofc) and falling first into bed and then in love. Not to mention the steamiest of all smuts when Iva joined the story in the later stages. Brava, ladies!

Honorable Mention

✨Tempting Fate her collab with meeee 🥰 I can’t praise Val enough for elevating this story not only with her storytelling, but also with her graphic design to make the text-based parts of this story so fun and engaging. I’m so proud of this story!