#just need to figure out what things would actually be useful for me to work on right this minute and then how to start them.
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Sugar, spice, and everything nice (Part 3)
Word count: 3100
Warnings: semi-public sex, sex toys, masturbation
You spend almost all of Saturday and Sunday at the bakery, just waiting for Agatha to walk in.
She never does.
It was especially hard on Saturday, opening up the box full of sex toys she had sent you and then having to come into work just an hour later, being more turned on than you ever had in your life. The only thing you were looking forward to was Agatha walking in and smirking at you. You were sorely disappointed.
So much so that you hadn’t even found it in yourself to use the toys she had sent. The vibrator, dildo, clit-sucker (you had finally figured out what it was), and the long distance vibrator had sat in the box on your floor for the whole weekend, you trying to not look at it whenever you walked in.
Was Agatha worried she had made a mistake? You hadn’t texted her Saturday morning upon receiving the package, assuming she’d be in the bakery that morning, but now it seemed too late to send a message.
Now it’s Monday and you’re supposed to go on a date tomorrow. Maybe you can wear the vibrator on Tuesday. Even just thinking about her letter sends thrills down your spine.
Is the date still on though?
And then the door opens and in walks Agatha. Your breath catches in your throat and you stand up off your stool. She is stunning.
She shoots you her signature smirk and all of your worries and doubts just melt away.
“Hey, doll,” she says, coming to a stop in front of the register.
“Agatha,” you sigh. “I haven’t seen you all weekend.”
She runs a hand through her hair and you find yourself transfixed. “Sorry, sweetheart. I got a new case and it’s very time-consuming. I kept trying to get away but I just couldn’t.”
And then you feel bad, because of course the excellent lawyer was working and wasn’t avoiding you.
A glint appears in her eyes. “Did you have a busy weekend?”
There’s only one thing she could be possibly talking about in that tone with that look on her face. Your cheeks redden and you look at the counter, wiping an imaginary speck of dust off it.
“I-uh-haven’t actually used any of them yet,” you answer sheepishly. You dare to meet her eyes to see that her smile has gotten bigger if possible.
“You haven’t? Why not?”
You shrug, too embarrassed to tell her that you were worried she was icing you out. It sounds stupid now, with her standing right there, but your thoughts tend to get the best of you when you’re alone.
“Do you need some help with them?” Agatha asks and you choke on nothing. You open and close your mouth a few times, not able to think straight but trying to formulate some kind of response, when she tosses her head back with a laugh. “I’m just joking, doll.”
“Do you really want me to wear the vibrator tomorrow?” Your voice falls to a hush even though it’s only the two of you in the store.
“You aren’t wearing it right now?” She teases and you gasp at the thought of her toying with you while you try to make coffee and talk to customers.
“No,” you squeak and shake your head furiously. “I didn’t know-”
“I’m kidding, doll,” she assures you. “Wear it tomorrow only if you want to. It connects to an app so you’ll have to send me the code on the manual once you open it. If you want to, of course.”
“I do,” you say hoarsely, feeling a flush all over your cheeks and neck. She smiles triumphantly and taps the counter.
“So, where are you taking me on our next date?”
You had actually spent a lot of time trying to figure it out. Obviously, as a college student making just above minimum wage, you couldn’t really treat her to a nice restaurant and you weren’t quite sure what she liked to do.
So you were settling for something simple.
A nice picnic in the park to watch the sunset. Maybe go for a walk after. Quality time is very important to you and you wanted to just be with the older woman.
You hoped it would be good enough for her.
“It’s a surprise. Pick me up at 6 tomorrow?” Not super classy to make her come get you, but you’d much rather ride in her slick, black Range Rover than have to pick her up in your ten year old Subaru.
“Any plans for after the date?” She asks casually.
Your mouth opens in mock outrage. “Do you think I’m the kind of girl to have sex after two dates?” With her, you are. You hope she says yes.
She smirks. “You seemed pretty desperate for sex after the first date, sweetheart. We don’t have to do anything though. We could always go back to my place and just watch a movie.”
“That would be nice,” you admit, even though you know you want her hands on your body. Fuck, if she wanted to come around the counter and slip her fingers into your pants right there and then, you wouldn’t be opposed.
She seems to know where your head is at and by the darkening in her eyes, she is feeling a similar sort of way. “And if you wanted to, you know, bring those toys…maybe we could finally put them to good use.”
Your eyes widen and you nod eagerly before you can stop yourself. She chuckles.
“Alright, well I guess I’ll see you tomorrow night at 6,” she says, drumming her fingernails on the counter one last time before shooting you a wink and leaving the bakery.
“Don’t you want-” Your attempt to ask if she wants coffee or cake falls upon deaf ears as the door opens and she’s gone.
You breathe a sigh of relief that she was just busy the past two days. And you’re sort of mad that you wasted those last two days not using the toys she had sent.
But that would end tomorrow.
Heat was already igniting in your stomach at the thought of it. You had never used a toy before and you were especially looking forward to trying the long-distance vibrator.
The rest of your shift is pretty quiet, not too many customers either on Mondays.
When you get back to your dorm, though, you realize that you are positively dripping. You guess your interaction with Agatha had more of an effect on you than you realize.
You chew on your lip and your eyes keep darting back and forth between your bed and the box of toys on the floor.
It couldn’t hurt to test one out, could it?
You grab the box with the vibrator and open it. Glancing at the instructions, you press the power button and gasp as the purple toy buzzes to life in your palm. You turn it off, heart pounding, and lay down.
You close your eyes and remember what it was like to kiss Agatha at the Winter Wonderland the other night. Her tongue in your mouth, her sucking your lip, her hand under your shirt. You shift and hike up the skirt you were wearing and place the vibrator on your clit over your underwear.
A whimper is forced out of your throat and your back arches off the bed. Quickly, you pull it away.
Holy fuck.
You’ve never felt anything so intense.
You take a deep breath and slowly place it against you again, mind wandering to Agatha.
Her veiny hands, her mouth, her confidence, the way she fluffs her hair. You imagine the way her fingers and tongue would feel on you. Your hips are rolling against the vibrator – that she gave you – and you’re already close. You truly cannot believe you’ve never used one before.
You cum harder than you ever have by your own hand at the wishful thought of Agatha laughing as she holds the vibrator against you.
It takes you a second to calm down and when you turn the toy off, you can still feel the rumbling in your hand.
And then you reach for your phone. Just used the vibrator. You click send before you can second-guess yourself.
Agatha’s response comes immediately after. And?
Changed my life lol.
She doesn’t reply for a few minutes so you go wash the toy, but when you come back, there’s a new message.
Just wait for tomorrow night, doll.
Heat flashes through you and you seriously consider using the vibrator again.
But you want to wait. You can wait.
However, the next 24 hours pass so slowly that you think time might have stopped.
There are countless times you look at the clock, expecting an hour to have passed, only to find that it was three minutes.
It’s like being a child on Christmas Eve again. Except instead of presents, you’re waiting to get fucked by an older woman.
Finally, finally, she texts you that she’s on her way and to get ready (she sends a winky face, as if there’s any doubt what she means).
You’re wearing a short lilac skirt so you bunch it up with one hand and slide your underwear to the side. You’re already wet just at the thought of seeing Agatha so you’re able to slide the bulb easily into you. It’s not too big but you can definitely feel it deep inside you. The other piece rests against your clit and you can only imagine what it will feel like when she turns it on.
You find the bluetooth connection instructions on the instruction manual and text it to her.
Barely a second later, she texts back Good girl. I’m about to turn into the parking lot.
It’s going to be a long night.
You wait until you see her car pull up before exiting the building, and as you’re walking to the car with the basket of food and a backpack with all the toys and some extra clothes, she turns it on. You almost fall to the ground. Thankfully you were holding onto the dinner tight.
If you thought the vibrator from yesterday was intense, it’s nothing compared to the sensation of it against your clit and inside you.
And just as quickly as the feeling came, it’s gone. You gasp and stumble hurriedly the rest of the way to the car before she can do it again.
Agatha’s smirk is dripping with smugness. “How does it feel?”
“Fuck,” is all you can say and she laughs.
“Fuck, indeed. Now, where are we going?”
You give her directions to the park. It’s in a pretty secluded area and there’s never really anyone there when it starts to get dark, so it should be empty. Even if it’s not, you’re just having a picnic.
And just as you suspected, there’s no other cars in the lot when Agatha pulls up to park.
“What are we going here, sweetheart?” She asks, curiosity tinging her voice. She’s not judging though. You knew she wouldn’t.
You hold up the basket. “I thought we could have a picnic?”
She smiles. “I think that’s an excellent idea, honey.” You lead her over to a spot by the perimeter by the hand and don’t let her do anything while you shake out the blanket and take out two plates of sushi and a bottle of wine. You pour her a glass while you finish making everything perfect and she watches you amusedly while sipping on the Rosé.
Dinner is so comfortable and filled with laughter and jokes and questions, and once you both are done with the food, you lay down on the blanket, Agatha’s arm around your shoulders and her other hand pointing out the constellations to you.
She shows you how to always be able to find the North Star, which is in Ursa Minor, and then points out the Big Dipper, and you lose yourself in watching her point to all the stars and hearing her tell you the stories. You’re having so much fun with her and she makes you feel at peace.
“I didn’t realize you knew so much about astronomy,” you say in awe, focusing on her face rather than what she’s showing you. She turns her head down so she’s looking at you.
“Have you been listening or have you been staring at me the whole time?” She jokes, kissing your nose and chuckling as you scrunch it at her.
“I’ve been listening!”
“Oh yeah? What’s that one then?” She points at a star and as you peer at it, her finger fumbles with something and the vibrator inside of you turns on, turning your thoughts to mush.
You had honestly forgotten that you were wearing it.
But it’s impossible to forget now, and your fingers dig into her side and you let out a quiet moan.
“Agatha,” you whine when it turns off.
“What constellation is that?” She turns it on again and your hips start undulating involuntarily as you rack your brain. Your eyes frantically dart to the surrounding stars as you start whimpering.
“Andromeda?” It’s partly a guess but you do remember her saying something about that one. You can vaguely remember the story too. Something about her mom being vain and then Andromeda being chained for a sea monster but Perseus rescues her.
The toy turns off and you gasp for breath. Your hips are still gently riding against nothing, missing the stimulation.
“Very good,” Agatha muses. “How are you feeling?”
“Why don’t you feel for yourself?” You challenge but your smirk turns into a gasp when she reaches over, pushes up your skirt, and rubs your slit over your underwear. Your hips chase her fingers but she pulls away.
You are throbbing.
She holds her fingertips up to the lamp and you both can see them glistening. You have soaked through your panties. Before you can say anything or be too embarrassed, she sucks them into her mouth and your jaw drops. She moans at your taste and when she opens her eyes, you can barely see the blue with how blown out her pupils are.
“Can we go?” You rasp.
“Sure, doll,” she says and helps you pack up so the two of you can get in the car faster. You’re checking the spot one last time just to make sure you have everything when Agatha turns the vibrator on. Your knees buckle this time because of how needy you are, but she catches you.
“Agatha,” you breathe, pleasure overtaking your body.
“Thought you wanted to leave?” She teases innocently and you wrap your arms around her so you can try to walk because she hasn’t turned it off.
You’ve become a moaning mess, face pressed hotly into Agatha’s neck while she basically drags you to the car. You can see goosebumps on the older woman and you can hear her breathing get heavier so you know she’s at least a little affected too.
“Please, please, Aggie, so close,” you babble and it seems like the car is a mile away.
“Aw, does my baby need some relief right now?” She asks, and as pathetic as it is, you nod your head eagerly. She turns it off and you’re able to stand on your own, but Agatha takes off in a different direction of the car.
“Where are you going?” You call after her, but then you realize she’s making a beeline towards a bench. You follow in a daze, not really sure what’s going on. She sits and pats her thighs.
“Since you’re so desperate,” she says with a smirk. You think you might cum right then and there. She spreads her legs when you get closer so you’re able to straddle one of her legs. “Grind.”
She doesn't have to tell you twice. You wrap your arms around her neck and bury your head back into her, moving your hips experimentally.
And then she turns the toy back on and you rip your face out of her shoulder to bite your hand before you moan loudly.
“Fuck,” you keen, rhythm getting sloppy but she moves her hands to her waist to help you out.
“You like this?” She pants into your ear and your resounding moan is all the answer she needs. “You like riding my thigh in a park where anyone could walk by and see how much you need me?”
You nod frantically, every single drag against her leg pushing the vibration against your clit. It feels so delicious and you’ve been on edge all day.
“So desperate for me, so desperate for mommy,” she whispers and her voice shakes a little on the last word, almost like she was nervous. Clearly she had nothing to be nervous about though, because your walls clench even more and you let out a loud whine. You can practically hear her smirking at you.
“Mommy,” you gasp, moving your hips faster, chasing your high. “Need to cum, so close.”
“Do you want to cum all over my leg right now?” She says lowly, peppering your jaw with kisses.
“Please, please, yes, mommy,” you beg. Agatha grabs your chin and tilts it up to lean in for a kiss, but she stops a breath away from your lips.
And then the vibrations stop.
“No, no,” you cry, furiously grinding against her leg, trying to regain the stimulation that you just lost. It’s no use; it’s not the same. Her fingernails dig into your hip to stop your movements.
Your head drops against her shoulder in frustration and you can feel her body shake with contained laughter.
“Why?” You ask and you’re almost ashamed of how needy you sound. Her thumb swipes your bottom lip and then brushes your sweaty hair off your forehead.
“I’m not having the first time I make you cum be on a park bench using a vibrator,” she says matter-of-factly. “It’s going to be in my bed, with either my fingers or my mouth.” You bite your lip at the thought and your hips give another weak jump. She smirks. “After that, we’ll have all the time for toys in the world.”
And with that, she stands you back up and pulls you to the car, intending to make good on her promise.
#agatha harkness x fem!reader#agatha harkness x reader#agatha x reader#agatha x you#agatha harkness x you#kathryn hahn x reader#agatha harkness smut#agatha smut#agatha all along
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I use Windows Night Light to help my sleep schedule, and it sucks so much. Half the time it doesn't even turn on. When that happens, I have to manually go click "Turn Off" (even though it was clearly not on), then click "Turn On" again, at which point it works.
So I went to go see whether there was a fix for this, and I saw all kinds of inconsistent suggestions, and I tried some of them, and it didn't actually fix anything. There are complications that come with having certain graphics cards, or drivers, and ...
Alright, look, I was a software engineer for many years, I know that sometimes things are more complicated than they seem. However, I cannot fathom why "adjust monitor colors at X hour" is so difficult that there are pages upon pages of complaints about it not working. It should work in the vast majority of cases, and what shouldn't fix it is just clicking a button to stop it and then clicking a button to start it again.
What I'm saying is that I'm in the market for a program that will do this very simple job, since apparently the bad behavior of this one is something that's just not getting fixed.
flux is not it. While I'm exasperated by the continual issues with Night Light, I am actively angry with flux. I live fairly far north by American standards. Sunset for me, right now, is 4:30PM. I like to have normal colors on my computer when I am, e.g. watching a show, playing a game, looking at pictures, etc. I only really need the warm colors in the three or four hours before I go to sleep. Flux is free software, so I try to keep my cool, but "please let me set my time manually rather than by location" is their single most requested feature, and every time they say "oh actually flux is for having your screen be in harmony with the natural environment, you don't need that". Maybe this is just steadfast refusal to engage in scope creep, but I've read a bunch of forum messages asking for the same feature that I want, and the answers are always "I don't understand why you would want that" or something equally infuriating in spite of how many times someone says "I'm a Finnish graphic designer with weird working hours" or equivalent.
The standard workaround seems to be telling flux that you're located in a different part of the world than you actually are, but this is terrible UI, and you would also need to change it in accordance with the time of year unless you spent some time figuring out the correct spot that you don't live which works year-round for you.
(I saw another hilarious workaround on the flux forums where a guy set up a scheduled Windows task to kill and restart flux at specific times.)
So I hate flux, in spite of my commitment to not hate free software that did not cost me anything and has never asked for anything from me.
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it was pretty obvious at this point that there must have been some sort of feelings beyond friendship that darius had for angel, especially if he believed angel would only be safe with him and nobody else. "it's okay if you talk about what happened to you, i don't want people knowing what he's done to me. you're my best friend, the way you looked at me last night," he looked away, shaking his head. "you were disgusted with how i looked. i can't begin to imagine what other people would think of me." his voice grew softer as he spoke, speaking just above a whisper by the end of his statement. there wasn't a whole lot that he remembered from last night, just little moments and angel lifting up garam's shirt to see the bruises on his torso was one of those moments. really, garam had no idea what angel might have said to darius, or even other people. and that scared him. garam didn't want to feel pitied, he didn't want to be looked down on for the choices he made. he thought he was in love, he was looking at the world through rose colored glass. the last thing he needed was for the details of his relationship to become public knowledge. with the fans he had as a popular streamer, he also had his fair share of haters and he knew that they would use this against him if they'd found out. darius barely knew him and he already holding garam's relationship against him. he found himself rolling his eyes dramatically, "i didn't mean like an actual dog. he's just big and scary like a good watch dog would be." he truly didn't mean any harm by it. garam nodded his head in agreement to the shower, knowing that the water would probably help the dull throbbing ache in his head from their night of drinking. he waited until angel had left before going into the bathroom and turning the water on. garam didn't particularly like using other people's shower products simply because the ones he had at his place were formulated specifically for his hair texture, and he was a bit sensitive to smells but he liked angel's scent so he figured using his shower products wouldn't hurt too much. but of course, being left alone, garam got too into his head and he began to worry. was this guy right? was angel really not safe with garam or was it his own feelings for angel that forced his bias? until his ex decided to give on garam, there was no way angel was really safe. he began to panic, the only thing he could think of doing to calm himself was to sit on the floor of the shower. his arms wrapped around his legs as he hugged his knees against his chest, letting the water run over his body. he didn't realize just how long he'd been sitting there until the water had run cold. garam had gotten up, turned the water off, and quickly dried off before walking back into angel's room and into the closet. he wasn't too picky with what he chose to wear, knowing that he'd be practically swimming in anything he chose, so he went with clothes that would hide both his arms and legs. once dressed, he made his way back out to the living room. he didn't look at either men as he sat down on the couch, picking up his phone in the process to look through the dozens of unread notifications. he remained quiet as he read through some of the texts, none of them worried garam until he scrolled down to another picture. he glanced over to darius but quickly looked back to his phone just as another text was coming in. i'm going to work but i'm going to swing by your place once i'm out, i hope to see you there. he sighed heavily, at least his ex wasn't hanging around and they were safe to go back to his apartment to pick up the things he needed. "you should know i would never let anything happen to angel while he's with me." his words were almost mumbled. if he was brave enough, he would have told darius he was used to his ex's aggression, just as he'd told angel, and would easily take the man's fists if it meant angel was safe. but how could he say that without leaving way for the other's curiosity to swell? "he's my best friend, i'd leave if i thought angel was in any danger."
For some reason Garam questioning him upset Angel. He knew Garam was just upset about hearing someone talking about him. Anyone would be. Maybe it was lack of sleep but the taller man snickered and shook his head. “He doesn’t think I’m safe with anyone but him” Angel let out a deep sigh rubbing his hand over his face. Ever since the other man’s confession he had been rather over protective of Angel. Questioning his every decision which he wasn’t a fan of. But he knew Darius heart was in the right place. Longing after Garam for so long it felt nice to have someone who openly shared his feelings with him. Who cared for him as deeply as he cared for Garam. He hated being in the middle of the two. He wished they could get along. However, from the way they were both talking that wouldn’t be happening any time soon. “Listen I know what you heard didn’t sound the best. But I wasn’t talking behind your back. He asked if I was okay and what happened last night. Garam it affects me too. I need to talk to someone.” Angel frowned now crossing his own arms. His glance went to his feet as he tired to calm himself down. Snapping at each other would make a tense situation worse. At the end of the day it wasn’t either of their faults. “I’ll be sure to steer clear of talking about you specifically. It’s not my intention to make excuses but I wish you would see my side. Garam you showed up here battered and bruised. He was sitting right in the living room with me. Would you not ask if you were him? Especially after I kicked him out as soon as you got here? And I also defended you immediately.” Angel could feel himself getting worked up again. The feeling of Garam questioning him felt personal. Angel did his best to always put his best friend first. He went silent for a moment taking a step back. “He won’t come into your apartment. I’ll be sure he respects you. But respect is a two way street. Don’t call him a dog. He is only here to help.” Angel muttered glancing back at the door. Leaving Darius to his own devices for too long would only make the situation worse. “Take a shower. You can borrow whatever you want from my closet. I’m going to finish breakfast. We can all eat together and have a proper conversation. Clear the air. How does that sound?”
#threads#thread: min garam#garam & angel#ang3lmoan#i couldn't make this longer even if i wanted to... apparently there is a 4096 character limit for blockquotes and i hit that exactly
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I Don't Stress About Losers
Poor Luna. Malcolm is a bitch her dad is a bitch now she has this weirdo hoe trying to mess with her bag
Transcript under the cut ~
Luna: So you’re telling me a few of my contracts have been cancelled?
Destiny: Just small ones like commercials and billboards, but they all called and said they would pay the termination fee. Apparently, they don’t want to work with you because of the news
Luna: Is that so?
Destiny: There’s more...
Luna: I’m listening...
Destiny: Chantel still wouldn’t share who gave her the information about your family but some of the people who cancelled said they were “persuaded” to replace you with that Akito girl. I pressed a little harder and they said her assistant was working real hard to take your resources by any means necessary
Luna: I beg your pardon?
Destiny: They’re purposely targeting you Luna! and I don’t understand why!!
Destiny: This is crazy! Do you even know who she is?? Why is she attacking you? Luna this is serious!! She’s trying to take your resources! She’s most likely the one who exposed your brother! and spread those lies all over SMZ!
Luna: Hmm...No need to freak out. Just a small time loser eating more than she can chew
Destiny: Luna!! We can’t just ignore this! We have to do something
Luna: Why do I need to stress about a loser?
Destiny: Yea Yea Yea you're THE Luna Villereal, you don’t need to worry about anything but this is about the principle! If she starts attacking you, others will think they can do it too! We have to nip this in the bud right now!
Luna: This is more funny than anything. All she did was spread some rumours and take a few low-level jobs. I still have the Vogue spread right?
Destiny: Yea...They said we don’t need to worry about it
Luna: Great. Ignoring the fact she’s spreading lies about my family, her trying to steal my work is much funnier don’t you think?
Destiny: Funny???! Wheres the joke!!? Im fighting for my LIFE trying to make sure SMZ stops reporting LIES on your name. And you think this is funny?
Luna: And I love you for that. Expect a big winter bonus.
Destiny: Luna!!
Luna: Its been so boring. Why don’t we have some fun yeah?
Destiny: Fun?
Destiny: Oh...How could I forget she tried to switch your name card with hers so she could sit next to Thorne Bailey. What about her?
Luna: Just a little. Remeber a few years back that simstagram influncer tried to take my seat at the starlight awards?
Destiny: Hmm...What do you need me to do?
Luna: Akito is just like her. A small time loser who doesn’t know her place. Lets use the Vogue Spread to show her where she belongs!
Luna: Just get her a spot, she can be on the full spread but not the actual cover. Let me know when that's done, then I’ll figure out the rest
Destiny: Other than that. Do you need me to do anything for you?
Luna: Yes actually. If you could clear up all the work I have lined up for the rest of the year that would be great. I’d like to put my focus on other things right now
Destiny: Already done. Are you...okay?
Luna: I’m okay...I have some family things I need to deal with. You don’t mind do you?
Destiny: Of course not. I’m just worried
Luna: Don’t worry Destiny I’m fine.
Destiny: Is Malcolm still being a bitch....
Luna: Yeah. He is but don’t worry I can handle his piss ass attitude...
Destiny: I know its not my place but don’t let him punish you or make you feel bad about wanting to get in touch with your older brother okay? He’ll come around once he sets some sense
Luna: I know. Just keep me updated on the Vogue spread and ignore SMZ they’ll get bored eventually
Destiny: Alright. I’ll call you later
#sims 4#sims 4 screenshots#sims 4 gameplay#thereevesfamily#ts4 screenshots#ts4 simblr#ts4 screenies#ts4 simbrl#ts4 stories#ts4 story#i may change the image sized again cuz i make my sims talk a lot omg
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Part 2
Okay this idea is not letting me alone so I will add some more ideas I had. It's again way to late (2am). This Is more of a telling the a story. (Also free to use this for inspo if someone wants to turn this in a fanfic)
Disclaimer : I'm Dislexic
Part 1
Hugh wakes up in Wades one room apartment in Logan's body, I would say about 1-2 months after the D&W movie. The fist thing he noticed is that every seems slightly different and he is hit with Logan's enhanced sense. Like everything is more vibrant he hears a lot of small things and not to forget the smells, I imagine that Wades apartment dose have a lot of strong smells that are not necessarily bad but just extrem. So Hugh needs to adjust to that fist and and than realize he is not in his home but a room that looked a lot like the Filme set from the Deadpool movies.
When he makes his way out of the room he is in another room that he finds oddly familiar he is hit with a extem sweet smell that he follows. Wade is in the kitchen making some breakfast unaware that his Logen was replaced with the Australian actor Hugh Jackman. Hugh on the other hand is more the confused why (what he assumed is Ryan in his Deadpool make up) was standing in front of him. They were finish with film a long time ago? He is beyond confused. Wade finally noticed that Hugh has entered kitchen and greets him with something like "Morning Honeybadger. How did my favorite miserable X-Men sleep?" What confuses Hugh even more.
"Why are was the film set? And why are you in full make up Ryan?" Hugh question the man I from of him who just stared at him with unbelieving eyes. "Are you messaging with me, Wolvie? I mean I appreciate that you try to fit my vibe but the 4 wall braking is my thing. I'm am impressed that you remember that I told you they I'm played by Ryan Reynolds, if I had a star sticker I would give it to you for good effort."
Hugh still not understanding what was happening just look at Wade, silence field the room. "Is this suppose to be at Prank Ryan ? You know I love you and all but that a bit much. Built up the complete fire set and all. You know I'm currently working on a completely different movie..." Hugh stop himself trying to figure out the face of the man that looked at him realizing it was full of shock
Wade started to feel like this wasn't a joke and the man in front of him was genuinely confused. "Wait do you actually think I'm Ryan Reynolds? "
"Yeah of course, wo else would you be, you know I appreciate your little joke but this is a lit far what is even supposed to be the pranked? " said Hugh still looking at Wade who was starting to loose even more of his already lost mind. -Okay everything is cool- he thought to himself. He knew Logen wasn't one to make this kind of jokes, this jokes where his thing. Which meant that this was probably not his Logen, if he was even Logen, considering he called him Ryan this only could mean one thing "Wail your Hugh Jackman?!"
To how they could swap bodys maybe something paradox related I read a few fanfic where he came back to mess with Logan and Wade, or something went wronywit the timeline and now they have to figure out how to fix it. Maybe they try to contact the TVA or the X-Men to help.
Some prompt like idea:
- Wade desperately trying to explain Hugh that he is actually Wade.
- Hugh being way to overwhelmd by all the new things he can hear/ smell
- Wade asking Hugh all kind of things about our world.
- Logens realization that his complete life is nothing more then a movie to entertain people in or world
- Ryan has to get used to Logen not being as calm and silly as Hugh.
- Logen seeing videos of Hugh and is surprised how joyful he is
- Logan bring pissed and confused why his claws don't come out and of no healing factor means he has to figure out how to be more careful in general.
- Ryan and Logan at Disneyland
- Ryan realizing that the multiverse exists and is not only a movie.
- Hugh experiences the horrors of 3 adamantium claws popping from his knuckles
- Hugh being worried about Wade being hurt because he is not use to people just healing
I will do a part 3 if I get any more ideas, no promises though. This entire idea just came from me daydreaming to music because I can't sleep.
#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine#deadpool#fanfic inspo#fanfiction inspo#fanfic inspiration#fanfic#x men movies#ryan reynolds#hugh jackman#wade wilson#logan howlett#poolverine#fanfic ideas#fanfiction#x men fanfiction
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Tbh I was radicalized this summer when you said we have progressed past the need for eddie therapy spec and fics. i havent read a single one since and probably wont again and my life has been so peaceful since… he literally does not need that. He just needs to feel secure and open with his feelings, needs to let people love him fully, and maybe some grief counselling/a support group to go to occasionally. If frank was going to help with that he would have in s3. (no offence to people who write/read therapy fics Im sure they are wonderful and profound and frank is actually good at his job in them)
helpppp good. thank you for giving me an excuse to talk about my beloathed therapy eddie because i think it’s so so so funny that after 8x06 the predictable response was that eddie needs to go to therapy. which i feel like there are soooo many things happening on both the character and the story level. like what’s funny is that frank really could not be a good therapist on screen because that’s not interesting tv. i’m not a therapist but i imagine that in fear-o-phobia he should have probably like. worked with eddie to decide on who he’d try to contact, figure out how the conversation might go, work on coping strategies, etc. but obviously eddie had to blow up. it’s funny because all of the other presumably “good” work frank does is completely off screen. because it’s uninteresting. so eddie wouldn’t have the kind of therapy arc people think he should have anyway, it’s quite literally just something people demand because they need a virtue signal that eddie is “trying” (and of course therapy is the only picture of “trying to heal”). the fact that he’s growing and dealing with stuff outside of therapy is like, not acceptable i guess? i think it’s also funny that as far as fic goes eddie is pretty much always in therapy but it is truly once in a blue moon that we see buck or really any other character talk about therapy.
anyway on the character level. obviously people who relate to eddie’s experience might find therapy really useful but i am not talking about real people i’m talking about a character who is fake. something that is very funny and interesting to me is that in the fear-o-phobia scene eddie is pretty much being resistant and mean and a bitch the whole time but when frank says “you can’t put all your feelings in a box eddie because someday it’ll blow up” and eddie literally already knows what’s going on (“…and take me with it”). actually eddie pretty much always knows what’s going on when he’s having issues it’s just he packs it all down. so seeing a character like this do the internal pathologized work of therapy with just. A Therapist. is… soooo boring to me. it’s funny because i do think frank was right. like in the end i think it’s sort of indicated that eddie is not only feeling this survivor’s guilt/pointlessness but that he also fears he’s going to end up like all the other people who share his pain. so he does need that sort of external pathway to dealing with his issues, like… exactly what you said… leaning on the people in his life… loving them and letting them love him… perhaps a support group or volunteering or whatever… in terms of an actual story these things are soooo much cooler and more fun than what therapy stuff can offer eddie specifically (like… strategies? identifying various cognitive distortions? idk). because he’s already a character who’s always in his head… it’s so much better. To Me. to see him work through things in other ways. such as by talking to a gay priest.
#asks#frankly i don’t think any therapy arc on 911 would be interesting but if anyone could ACTUALLY use it consistently. buck and bobby. to me
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You mentioned Sol & Minerva interacting in the tags of a post and now I’m curious what you think the dynamic would be like between Sol and your other protagonists
sol’s family fled ferelden when they were a kid because of the blight, so they have an extremely weird relationship with the concept of the Hero Of Ferelden and would be a little nervous to meet her in a deeply uncharacteristic way. meanwhile, minerva would recruit sol to the wardens faster than you can blink. oh a world-class darkspawn slayer who’s, yeah, impulsive, but also fearless, charismatic, and adaptable, and has even thought about joining up because they want out of their current life situation which happens to be a faction minerva has beef with? Hers Now. i actually had them interact in that post in a theoretical situation where sol is pregnant because that’s the only thing i can think of that would slow her down. legendary minerva viago custody battle let’s go
varric picked sol out partly because they are (in his eyes) keir if he was funny and likeable. (scrappy sword and board human warrior fereldan blight refugee who cares a lot about a sibling figure.) keir would IMMEDIATELY clock this and sigh internally. even today he has to endure whatever the fuck varric’s issue was and now he has to grieve about it too. sol when dealing with keir would probably poke the bear a lot so to speak because they’re very good at noticing when someone is actually all bark no bite and they would think he’s funny when he gets snappy. they don’t respect him and only think of him as varric’s old friend rather than a Great Hero of Thedas or whatever. i think he would find their particular mixture of high energy and pessimistic beliefs irritating. keir loves people who are passionate about things; sol is easily bored, they usually don’t want to hear or give lengthy explanations, their mind skips from one thing to the other. he would probably also be the one to notice the real way in which sol is dangerous: not just that they’re an impulsive live wire, but also the other thing he and they have in common, which is their intensely specific priorities. they would both let the world burn if like 5-10 specific people didn’t need it to live on. and he would, rightly or not, consider their set of 5-10 people—well, mostly the central antivan crows—to lead in more questionable directions than his set
toramar cadash would think of sol as a kid who’s been through a lot. he sees them and is immediately not happy with varric’s choice; this weight should have landed on the sturdier, more experienced shoulders of someone who could actually handle it and, ideally, not come out broken the other side. and someone who isn’t visibly the absolute worst shot at getting solas to hear them out! but he can’t change things now so all he can do is show confidence. sol is sharp enough to pick up on that but shrugs it off. one major thing which is continually hysterical to me: sol is andrastian, and used to listen to varric. resulting in the fact that there is a non-zero possibility to them that toram is legitimately andraste’s herald. because they are also an objectively funny person whose mind somehow moves on quickly from this kind of world-shaking concept—got things to do and places to be!—this doesn’t massively affect how they talk to him. but it is present and they do give his opinions more respect than they would most people’s. interpersonally toram quite likes sol. they’re fun and a breath of fresh air; most of the people he talks to these days are just so squeamish about lines of work like the ones they come from. they remind him of sera a little bit and sera was a massive favourite of his. this makes him go back around again to feeling worse about their involvement lmao
#veilguard spoilers#sol de riva#these might be subject to change but feel correct#i had a laugh just recently abt how similar minerva and viago actually are lmao#sol stay away you do not need another one of these#minerva surana#keir hawke#toramar cadash
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interesting to me how when i turned 19 i was kinda terrified bc i was like “oh shit this is my last year as a teenager….. i won’t be a teenager after that… i wanted to be a teenager for all of my childhood and now that part’s almost Over. aaaaugh” and now approx. 9 months later i cannot fucking WAIT to stop being a teenager oh my god i am ready to move on. 20s please i would like to be in them. i am done being 19 thank you !!!
#marzi speaks#it’s . probably bc of the vasculitis thing#which like. while it is a traumatic thing that i need to work through and plan on going to therapy about#it also put a LOT of things into perspective for me#and like actually i do not think i am afraid of growing up anymore !#i mean i still have like. the imposter syndrome and the fear of getting overwhelmed and falling behind#that’s not gonna go away overnight that’s been there for as long as i can remember#BUT!! i know deep down that i can figure it out now.#bc i figured out a lot. i figured out how to gauge my physical well being#i figured out how to be someone who can regularly make phone calls without crying#i figured out pharmacies. and i’m figuring out how insurance works#and appointments and withdrawing from school and reapplying to school#and all of the lifestyle changes that come with having an autoimmune disease#i’m learning self advocacy. i’m learning how to respond when people treat me poorly (always accidentally so far)#yeah getting my license has been hard and slow just bc i have all the anxiety shit about it. but i AM putting that effort in#i dunno it’s just. adult responsibilities are horrifying and the prospect of existing independently in our current society#is horrifying. and i think i’ll always be scared.#but i used to think i might not be able to handle it. that i would fall apart#i know now that i won’t. i will find a way to move forward and be happy. because that’s what i’ve always done#if i can take the scariest couple of months in stride the way that i have. then i think i can handle it#anyways. 19 was eventful enough can i be 20 now. i think being 20 would be good for me#still a Weird thing to think about. two whole decades. but like i can do it methinks
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Last Line Tag Game
Thanks for tagging me @teejaystumbles ! A really nice surprise!! :D I am indeed contemplating writing two Dead Boy Detectives fic right now, but they're both in the very early 'being-outlined-in-my-head' stage, haha. They both revolve around post-s1 Edwin pining for Charles, one where Edwin takes matters into his own hands and one where he decides to have a chat with the Cat King about it. Not sure if they'll ever be written but they're intriguing!
But for the sake of the tag game, here's a lengthy bit from a Dreamling wip I've slowly been chipping away at for a few months!
A scene from Every Little Thing (Working Title)— In which Morpheus is a figure drawing professor who has just been fired from a film production based on his comics, and Hob does part-time figure modeling and is determined befriend the aforementioned professor.
Morpheus picks his class schedules wisely— he runs two first year general figure drawing classes, at 8 a.m. and at noon on Mondays and Thursdays. He helps the uni’s live figure workshop club on Wednesdays and Fridays at 6 p.m., and meets his sister for lunch on Wednesdays. All other free time was dedicated for his industry work. That wouldn’t be a concern anymore, would it. By the time Morpheus unlocks the door to the studio, sets his bag down by his desk, and starts fiddling with the ceiling studio lights pointed at the model stand, all of Morpheus’ thoughts have reduced to pure spite. Fine, maybe the big studios don’t want him. They don’t deserve him, then, their loss. His portfolio and repertoire are infamous in the industry, they’ll be crawling back to him in no time. Too bad, maybe he would have started his own production studio and he’ll end up with the next ground-breaking animated film. Maybe— Morpheus’ thoughts are interrupted by a knock at the door. He shakes himself out of it, calling, “Come in.” A glance at his watch tells him it’s only 7:48, perhaps it’s an overeager student here early. It’s only the second week of the semester, they grab every opportunity to prove themselves with a spirited step that Morpheus might be slightly envious of. “Hello, Morpheus Endeles?” Hearing his full name startles Morpheus, and he turns from the lighting settings to the door. “Yes?” The man who steps into view can only be described as radiant. He can’t be much older than Morpheus, not much taller either but wider in the shoulders. His hair is cropped just above his shoulders and he sports a neatly kept beard. Morpheus registers this all first simply because of his profession but— he gets caught on the man’s brilliant smile and deep brown eyes. There’s something there that knocks all thoughts clear out of Morpheus’ head. The stranger smiles warmly, smiles like he already cares. “I’m here to model for the morning and noon figure classes?” The man says. Morpheus clears his throat and steps forward, “Yes, this is the right studio.” He extends a hand, “Robert Gadling, I presume?” The man takes his hand— god, he’s so warm— and shakes it steadily, “Please, call me Hob! All my friends do.”
I'm a sucker for the 'Morpheus catalogues Hob's appearance during their first meeting' trope in most Dreamling human AU fics, I couldn't not do it too :]
Besides this, I've also got a Dreamling Velvet Goldmine-ish AU fic that I want to get done this summer. I'm a very slow and ruminative writer so let's see if I can commit to any of these fics now that I've posted about them lol!
No pressure tags! I have no idea who's been tagged recently so-- lol. @hardly-an-escape @valeriianz @moorishflower @amielot :)
#ive seen so many Artist Dream AUs but theyre always pretty vague with the specifics of his work so i was like#i need to write the specific ins-and-outs of what my ideal Artist Dream AU would be. and its this#that he's a really difficult collaborator with extreme creativity who starts out in animation#and branches out from there into art directing various things doing his own comics on the side (the corinthian is one of his comics)#(he DEFINITELY forays into themed environmental design)#which is half inspired by my actual professors' professional lives and a guest speaker that spoke to us recently#i want morpheus to be really good at teaching younger artists#and i want him to doubt weather his passion for storytelling is worth it#and i want hob to befriend him and ground him by reminding murphy about what he loves about making art#and of course i love figure drawing classes so much! theyre the essence of narrative art#and ofc hob and dream are gonna fuck at some point. i already have a mildly kinky sequel scene planned involving hob knowing how paint#anyway god this is so long#i just love the ideas in this fic theyre so personal to me. i really hope i finish this fic and get to share it with everyone :')#LONG POST AUGH ANYWAY BYE THANK YOU FOR TAGGING ME TASH!!!!!!#i dont really get to talk about my fic anymore so this was really nice thank you :') !#rex writes#rex speaks#tag game#last line tag game#long post#fic
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post ankle-twisting clarity
#i slipped in the mudddddd the other day LOL i twisted my one ankle and scraped up my other knee#so the past few days ive just been kind of needing to waddle around.....#LUCKILY its healing well and fast <3 but yknow i was like#so stressed out over shit that doesnt matter in school. and like this is an awful unintentional habit i have but i will get like#overly stressed over shit and then i'll start getting SUPER careless with everything. and then i'll injure myself foolishly and Calm Down#happened last year with my foolish midnight woodcarving incident LOL its always november....#BUT yeah luckily this years foolish injury is a quick one at least!!#but yeah like genuinely i was so stressed out about all my fine arts major shit. teachers have been really getting on my case recently#my main professor said that it was a good thing people get so riled up with my work because it means its impactful#tbh i didnt believe her at all i thought she was just trying to placate me but then i listened closely to the things faculty say when#they look at my fucking. cartoon wolf drawing or something and i think. she might be right actually. people keep getting frustrated with me#because i think they see a lot of potential in me but i basically only have to drive to draw cartoon wolves etc HFKJSDHJVKRFEds#which is great for my ego. maybe too good for my ego. that my mark making and colour use etc is so evocative to these industry and#instutition people. but on the other hand i was told like thrice now that my work has no place in a gallery. which is fine although im not#totally sure how true that is. but also afterwards one time i was suggested to go into animation instead which is. um.#so its not out of nowhere i mean i did want to be an animator when i was like 10 but if you know anything about the current state of the#animation industry its like genuinely wild to tell someone who you've only seen 2 dimensional watercolour and acrylic painted#sketchy lined drawings from and who has said they cant do digital art anymore that they should get an animation degree?#brother they would kill me. i would be killed. i had an inkling but it really made me notice so clearly how limited the experiences my#faculty kind of have with certain industries. which is fine. or maybe not. for a professor LOL but yknow. but i was like huh. i guess i can#just kind of chill lol if i just keep doing things maybe something will come of it. i may not get as much help in my artistic development#rn as i would like. but its chill i think i'll figure it out if i just keep doing stuff <3#doesnt really matter that my teachers dont know what to do with me. my kneeeee has a booboo so i am CHILLING out :)
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Me> [struggling to unravel a very annoying UI bug]
My brain, entirely unprompted> H E Y. IF JAHEIRA HAD USED SOME MORE MINOR VERSION OF THAT RITE OF THE TIMELESS BODY ON RASAAD TO EXTEND HIS LIFESPAN, IT WOULD RESOLVE THE MORE FINICKY TIMELINE ISSUES ABOUT RION BEING THEIR KID.
Me> ...ok? I didn't ask right now but thank you for working that out I guess.
#bjk talks#i need some sort of ship name tag for them so people can ignore my ramblings about it XD#i loved astreamofstars's headcanon that rion actually is jaheira's biological kid and named for gorion#which in my worldstate headcanon would definitely make her also rasaad's#but given Rasaad is human and definitely seems at least in his thirties in bg2#and rion is a half elf but is definitely still a young adult which feels like she's 50 at most#the timeline gets funky bc rasaad would have been like 80 :P#which is like physiologically possible but unlikely in the normal run of things#i had been speculating that J originally researched the rite in the first place at least partly to extend their time together#and her dialogue implies she never figured it out completely (and also had more altruistic intentions for its use at full power)#but no reason that there couldn't have been some lower-level version involved#bc it's magic XD#and i can do what i want#anyway ty for coming to my self-indulgent ted talk#i need to start working on the next chapter of Open Your Eyes#ETA: zenjestrr just pointed out to me that as a monk Rasaad would have Timeless Body feature which simplifies things physiologically XD#yay DND#it's more complicated than just that of course and now i'm resisting writing a whole essay about jaheira's thought processes#XD
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i think i have to kill someone.
#WHAT.WHAT . WHAT. WHAT .#why would you bring something up from so long ago and then blame the (then) five year old . what . WHAT . HUH. weird. weiirrdddd.#so you knew? you knew? and instead of being like wow that's Not Normal you demonise the toddler that's probably...... idk.#kids don't Do That what a weird fucking thing to bring up out of NOWHERE just to immediately brush off#i think i have to kill you. i think i have to actually kill you now.#speechless. flabbergasted. i cant even talk about it its so WEIRD. CRAZY. CRAZY THING TO BRING UP#oh my god. if a child was being Like That i would assume the worst and insist someone look into thing and make sure the kid is SAFE????????#jesus. damn. what thebhhell. HUH. if its about what i think its about. it wasnt their fault? at all?#stuff Like This is complicated but jesus. JEEESSSUUUUUSSSS. dont even bring it up this late#if you KNEW. oh my god. IF YOU KNEW??????????#rant#oh my god. extremely vague do NOT ask About It i cant even. jesus. why would you keep something like that to yourself#or use it as 'gossip' or . whatever the FUCK she was doing???#idc if you have your own shit to work through. GROWN ASS WOMAN. you should've approached it with kindness and understanding? and figure out#if help was needed? its not my life its not my anything but that kid is my friend who i had to take care of instead of you FUCKING ASSHOLE#if i KNEW i wouldve at least tried to help. to understand. i hope you die a slow painful death in an empty room cause you cut everyone off#and then turned around to be WORSE . i'd tell you to killyourself but any possible method would avoid you like the damn plague#WOW. that was a lot my bad. pissed the hell off#you say shit about the kid that I!!! had to basically raise cause you were too busy being a judgmental piece of shit. ugh. grrr.#''wow thats so weird where did they even get the idea for that behaviour'' man idk but wasn't it supposed to be your job???? TO FIGURE IT OU#fuming whatever. whatever. none of this is news to me she's always been insufferable#rant .#vent#WHATEVER.#it was so long ago it just.#no reason to bring it up#but if you knew than you should've tried to do something#but you didn't. cause you're cruel and egotistical#and everyone you know hates you. and if they don't you take advantage of them.#what a woman. thanks for teaching me to go through the world with so much hate
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if i might bitch about work for a second: yesterday was hellishly bad despite being able to keep up with it and i found out that apparently our department made 4600 dollars yesterday which is making me angry beyond belieffffffff
#this is math i do fairly often bc i enjoy ho-hum math and hate my job and like#even if we took off 2000 bucks for overhead costs which feels excessive but i will concede it#that would be enough to pay everyone working a little over 860 dollars which is 300 more than what i make in a WEEK#literally WHEREEEEE IS IT WHERE IS IT GOING WHERE IS IT#i dont like following this logic through because on days where there are fewer orders we;d do less#and i disagree with gig work's implementation as ive seen it and i think that would stress people out worse than we already are#(which is significantly)#but at the same time. 850 dollars. i cant afford to buy groceries this week. 850 dollars...#can i get a BONUS or SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#it makes me soooo angry i was talking to one of the deli guys who asked for a raise and got denied mid-question#before our director accidentally showed him that their department is four thousand of gods own dollars under labor#its so revolting to me i talk to so many people in this store who are terrified because of medical bills or rent or car shit#half my department works two jobs just to get by and ALL OF THEM drive junkers#honestly one of the things thats scaring me about if i actually move out is that i do rely on...living with my mom#i pay for most of my own food i pay an absurd amount of rent to share a room with her but she's willing to drive me to work#even though i've offered to walk multiple times and she REALLY should prioritize her own time more#but at the same time...not having to pay for rides has been carrying me hard#if i got a car i'd be fucked because those things bleed money and generally ethically i disagree with cars#but if i dont its like okay pony up the money learn to navigate buses (except for sunday when they dont run) or get ready#to walk to your job where you walk all day and then walk home in the dark#which. i love walking. and listening to music on my own while walking. so bad example. but i also love not having my feet hurt#all the time always no matter what im doing which is something im becoming increasingly unfamiliar with#its like. ultimately. something's gonna get fucked no matter what#and then i hear a figure like 4600 and i remember how avoidable all of this shit is. how avoidable it is for ANY of us#our ceo is gonna walk away from this merger attempt with 5 billion dollars in safety-cushion money#the 10 top execs beneath him with 1 billion#and its just so. what can you even do. 5 billion. can a number like that even mean anything? how could you possibly need that much#850 dollars would be a lifechanging amount of money for me right now and im not even one of the worst off#its just. god. this world could be anything but what it is but its this and for what
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I wanted to make a cleaner summary of last week's classes and also review the classes I have this week since the material is already uploaded beforehand but I was feeling so horrible throughout the day that when I sat down I was just gonna look at the ones for tomorrow but I think I'm just gonna go to bed because I just gave my little numbers game a few tries and not even the joy of tribial elementary school-level math games is bringing my brain cells and/or full sentience back
#diary#accessing it through the CMD thing and not just running it from the IDE made me realize a few things about it though so I'll hav#I'll have to maybe jot them down somewhere when I'd normally just be rly excited and try to fix them straight away like I am truly fucked r#I do wanna make an eng version of it sometime soon so I can share it even tho it's literally the simplest little thing. it's fun if you're#an easily amused nerd that loves playing with numbers in a truly useless manner. if that makes sense#also very obviously text-only I am NOT torturing myself with any graphics of ANY kind rn#it closes immediatly as they do and also when it comes to having double/triple digit starting numbers it becomes a lot less fun I think tho#though I haven't used it much with those yet#I still wanna figure out a way of making it better when it comes to 2/3 digit starters. and my original idea included maybe keeping track#keeping track of how many steps you took even between different rounds but I made the simplest version for now. I also think making like a#''this was the least amount of steps possible!'' type thing would be very very cool but that is FAR too big brained for me rn#cause I can figure out how to do the record keeping thing but that last one is like. let's stop talking for a little while.................#oh but adding an actual interface sounds so fun even though I have very little clue on how to do that rn I could probably STOP typing becau#because I can feel my stupid ass self start getting excited about this which will make it so I start working on it instead of going to bed#NO. DOWN !!!!!!!!!!!!!! auhgh............ oh man I had a lame joke to make but I completely forgot what it was#I have coding class tomorrow in which I normally just do the exercises as fast as possible before playing around but the only Python editor#I could find installed on the school computers was Visual Studio Code and I have no clue how to use that shit like I don't need so many#so many buttons. probz. OKAY GOODNIGHT
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sudden realisation that the thing holding my art back is that I never had an anime phase
#going to find a time machine and get my younger self into death note or smth#I have been driving myself insane for the past few years bc I wanna draw characters but all I know how to do is portraits#I’m trying to figure out how I could recreate smth similar now and tragically I think it does just come down to draw more :/#however! I am also going to try using brushes which will be bad for sketchiness and better for lineart bc I might need to force myself here#I just gotta simplify things down to basic shapes how hard can it be#[has been thinking this exact thing for years and it’s not worked]#I am getting better every time I do stuff I’m just not satisfied bc art is frustrating when you know what you want but can’t get there#god it’s 2am I should not be awake rn but I could draw again tonight so I was taking advantage#endlessly frustrated by hair. why is it so awkward. I need to understand hair better how do I do this#i have a feeling it’s bc I’ve not figured out how to apply the shit I figured out abt volume yet#I’m also getting impatient bc I’ve been trying to do a study thing for some art styles but I decided I wanted to draw ocs instead of that#when I hadn’t gotten to the actually important bit which was. making smth new. but I can still do that#and I ended up doing a different style anyway (someone pls stop me rounding everything make me use high opacity square brush for my health)#the Other problem is I never wanna switch brushes. like I want to use one brush for whole drawing bc the extra clicks annoy me#I wonder if there’s a shortcut to swap brushes#anyway I’m gonna stop complaining bc drawing is fun but god I wish I’d drawn some more pokey mans when I was a teenager yknow#ideally younger. would rlly like to not have to actually think to figure this out rn#I’m probably overthinking stuff anyway honestly and I KNOW I’ll get it if I practice enough but goddamn it is hard to practice#especially when my me insists on making the bad things look better by making it more realistic#instead of figuring out why the shapes aren’t working#OKAY IM DONE WITH THIS NOW. GONNA TRY NEW ART THINGS LATER STOP TALKING <3#luke.txt
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FUCK i have to try and handmake the xmas cards for my aunt's family and my grandparents. so they can be sent out when we send out my mum's xmas package. I fuckin forgor. also. terrified they're gonna look like shit and get made fun of (family holiday tradition for many handmade things unless they're Up To Family Standard aka as close to professionally made as possible). but I can't afford to buy cards rn, not when Hallmark is like fuckin. six bucks a card and that's probably an out of date price tbh, they're probably more expensive since last I checked.
What if Housemate and I just went to live with the cats in a lighthouse and only sent out whatever we could as we could and ppl would just have to like it or lump it, and also the gov would pay us to keep up the lighthouse . what if
#text post#im slightly melting down and rambling ignore me#just need to figure out what things would actually be useful for me to work on right this minute and then how to start them.#something i tend to struggle with but it's fine. it's fine. everything is fine. they'll make fun of the cards but it's fine#bc worse would be them shaming me for not getting any cards sent bc then mum would get on me too and i can hear it already#'arent you grateful that we love and look after you so much? the least you could do is send a card. i guess u don't really love us or care'#but i do i care so much and I'm trying and i want to show everyone how much i care and how grateful i am for their help to keep me alive
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