#just like everyone else can. just because someone’s ace doesn’t mean their relationships are any less strong or valid

[crazysnor1ax]

Calf1sh but it’s my werekraken AU. Happy birthday gay people

[anodymalion]

ok I am in fact using this as an excuse to make a long post about this thank you thank you asjksdjfaljdf

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Interpreting Yuri as asexual is my very very favorite type of headcanon, which is one that 1. is compellingly coded in the source material (even if that wasn't the creator's intent), 2. is thematically relevant to what the piece of media is Trying To Do as a whole, and 3. just means a lot to me, personally, because I said so.

Coded in the source material

Yuri’s short program is “eros”, aka desire (you can interpret what “eros” means in various ways, but YOI itself explicitly refers to sexual love, at least in the English translations). Yuri struggles with this. Hard. He can’t come up with an answer when asked what eros means to him. His big revelatory moment about desire is that it’s how he feels about wanting to eat his favorite food (omg… boy). Even as the season goes on and the way he views the Eros program changes, the program doesn’t ever really embody the idea of eros as sexuality or romance (which was how the other characters expect him to interpret it) but rather as a desire to keep Victor in his life.

Like look. I’m obviously not going to say that the creator intended any kind of ace subtext to be there. I kind of doubt it was her intent. But goddamn is the subtext there.

2. Thematic relevance

The central theme throughout YOI is “love”, and especially loving people in a way that inspires you both to be your best selves: Yuri learning that the people in his life truly love and support him; Victor finding someone who makes him feel joy about skating again.

Like, Yuri’s whole skating theme for the Grand Prix is literally about him exploring what love looks like to him, even when it takes a form that other people don’t totally understand. Viewing all this through a lens of him being ace is really compelling. It adds depth to the idea of learning how to express the way you feel love even when it looks different than what other people expect. I think it’s a really delicious layer that adds even more nuance to what the show is getting at.

Besides, it’s an interesting way of viewing the criticism of the show that occurred for it not being 100% explicit about them being a couple (aka people getting mad because the kiss in ep 7 is blocked by Victor’s arm lmaooo). Like, ok, did you see the ending scene of ep 9? Did you see ep 10??? They definitely, definitely love each other, in whatever way that means for them. Their relationship takes a form that’s pretty different than the other way people in the show are going about romantic relationships, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t real for them. That is very much in line with the main themes of the show.

3. Means a lot to me

In the final scene of the penultimate episode, Yuri tells Victor that they should end their coaching relationship after the Grand Prix ends. This is because he thinks he’s holding Victor back, that Victor would be happier being free to go back to skating on his own instead of being Yuri’s coach. When I watched this (and, I’ll be honest, this is completely me projecting here) I REALLY interpreted this as an ace thing. I think it’s pretty easy to internalize the idea when you’re asexual that you just won’t be… enough, for other people. In my case I ended up a strong impulse to self-sabotage relationships because I would rather be the one to end things than to let someone else tell me that who I am as a person is fundamentally lacking. Yuri destroying a connection he desperately wants because he thinks there’s something about him that is holding Victor back from a life he’d be truly happy with? Oh yeah. I can fucking relate to that.

Also: YOI came out in 2016, which was the absolute peak of hostility to ace people I was seeing on this site. It was bad here. At the same time Tumblr was going wild over this show. Everyone was watching it. Seeing a whole site of people absolutely adore a character I very deeply in my heart believed to be ace? Extremely vindicating.

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In conclusion Yuri is asexual because it is fun and interesting that way, and also because of this:

[ari-but-unhinged]

Art for Toritsuka/Hairo fic where I explored what was meant to be a crack ship and is now one of my favourite (??) ships in Saiki k- PLEASE HEAR ME OUT

(A long rant ensues so, if you don’t want that then that’s all good and you don’t have to click, but if you’re interested, then welcome to my rant about a rare pair i love!)

Of course, I started out by simply laughing at the “I hate men” line Toritsuka said about Hairo and thinking writing a crack taken seriously fic would be funny and it would be a nice break before I started this other fic I have planned that is going to be an even bigger endeavour with Saiki k x Danganronpa. What I didn’t see happening was for this Torihai fic to completely take over my brain space and end up with a fic just shy of 20,000 words.

This may not seem like a lot, but I usually only write fics in 1,000-2,000s so this is a lot for me, especially since I’m a slow writer/editor so it takes me a while.

Part of the reason I love these two together is because of the inherent dynamic of Hairo’s inspirational preachiness and how it doesn’t work on Toritsuka, and how it might be refreshing for Hairo to have someone who challenges him (and not in the fake way Teruhashi does, with Toritsuka being very upfront and honest about it). Toritsuka also, because he’s so upfront about his feelings, helps Hairo to express certain emotions like annoyance/sadness that he wouldn’t normally express outwardly. Something else too is that Toritsuka tends to be very physically affectionate, and I don’t know that Hairo is used to that (I haven’t seen any examples of him being physically affectionate in any other way than a bro way) so that could be refreshing as well. Also, also, Toritsuka is Hairo’s gym buddy who was reluctantly dragged along that day Saiki was trying to avoid everyone and no one can change my mind lol (this, in Hairo’s mind, forms a bond between them that can never be broken and he will never stop reminding Toritsuka of this when they hang out).

I just think their dynamic can be playful/fun because they’re both real with each other if that makes sense?

On Toritsuka’s side of things, he doesn’t have a lot of friends and the friends he does have he either doesn’t have any chemistry with or hate him (Saiki lol), so I think it’d be nice for him to have someone who is extremely caring/attentive to his friends and clearly cares deeply about them and shows it often. Because of this, Hairo shows interest in Toritsuka’s life, and for someone who probably hasn’t had many friends, that would mean a lot. Also the fact that Hairo cares so much for Toritsuka sets an example as to how to be a good friend/human would behave and could help him grow as a person (which are always the best friendships/relationships when they grow together rather than staying stagnant and dragging each other down). Being more caring of others and allow him to develop his interpersonal relationships with more than just ghosts, instead with real humans.

Also, I’ve taken to calling them the “errand boys” because it’s a great prompt to force two people who are polar opposites and would never interact to hang out/do an activity together, so I thought it fit them perfectly.

In the fic I changed a few things from canon (sexualities obviously- Tori is bi/queer and Hairo is gay. Although quick side-tangent- I’ve written Tori/Kaidou, Tori/Akechi, and now Tori/Hairo and all three of them either are Asexual or are often headcanonned as ace by the community/me and I just find it very funny that the horniest character is continuously shipped with them. I only realized I did this after I first started writing the fic.)

- Hairo explicitly has psychic powers (it’s something they can bond over and it’s something that plays off of Hairo’s emotions. Cue a lot of blushing not only because of embarrassment but also actual literal heat rushing to his face.)

- Hairo was raised by a single parent (His family is never mentioned so I just made one up)

- Personal headcanon, but I feel like Toritsuka might occasionally pretend to not see spirits in order to avoid getting approached.

- Toritsuka’s backstory has been slightly altered and has a lot more angst to an already pretty sad backstory (it’s played for laughs, but imagine how that would’ve felt for him :( he realized he lost two people he loved in a matter of minutes. Also, he’s a child when this happens so that’s even sadder. I honestly wonder if they died somewhere in the house or he was just there and his guardians didn’t know, like??? How???)

If this made you interested in reading the fic which this is all about, I’ll link it at the end, but if you were just here for the rant, that’s cool too! I’m obsessed with these two because they’re adorable and I must spread the gospel of Torihai.

Link to original fic-

[bastetwastaken]

Writeblr intro

Hey! I’ve been around on tumblr for a while now, and have been writing for probably the best part of fifteen years but actually only posting publicly for the last three. I’ve only ever posted fanfic, but I never stopped writing original things, I’ve just never felt able to share any of it until now. So here’s a little intro for me and my writing!

General stuff:

Call me Bastet, it’s what most know me as so it’ll just be easier

In my (very) late twenties

Living in the UK.

Other hobbies outside of writing include reading, crocheting, cross stitching, hiking and spending time with my three cats.

Bi-Ace, more sex neutral.

My anxiety can make it hard for me to post consistently, but I will ALWAYS talk about my wips with anyone willing to listen to me ramble, just be prepared for those rambles to get looooooong.

Themes in my writing:

For anyone who knows me, I think it’s safe to say I lean very much toward the cliche romance which aims to leave you wanting to gag on the sweetness whilst embracing the fuzzy warmth in your chest.

I hate sad endings. My characters will always have happy ones… eventually.

I try to keep my writing light since the real world makes us all suffer enough, so any angst will usually be light touch and always necessary to the character and or plot. I do make my OCs suffer sometimes, but not needlessly.

A focus on realistic characters, character growth and character traits.

What am I working on right now?

Untitled (titles are hard) A fantasy romance between a human and the demon who accidentally saved his life.

The general plot will follow both characters as they help each other (unintentionally at first) to heal and learn, to grow together as individuals. The human gets his opportunity to confront a past which has left him feeling empty inside and unable to form meaningful relationships, and the demon gets the chance to learn a little about what it means to be human. Their first meeting turns into a deal which binds them together, then a friendship neither thought they were capable of having, and eventually something more.

The main characters: Aviditas, Avi for short, an Incubus and Silk (placeholder name) a human.

Other fun stuff:

Demonic magic

Incubus antics

Character development and growth

Healing and comfort

A little slow burn but it’s more because these two are just idiots, with Silk thinking he’s so undeserving of any kind of care on account of past events and Avi being conditioned in Hell to believe that demons are incapable of any sort of feeling that it takes them a WHILE to work things out and actually talk.

Fun tropey romance!

I’ve tried to keep this short for the sake of everyones sanity but I will talk endlessly about this story and the characters if anyone would like to know more. (But I’ll also be posting more about them anyway so…)

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Fate or Fatuity? (working title) Another fantasy romance! No surprises here. This time, following the sons of two feuding kings who meet entirely by chance and gradually grow closer.

The general plot follows the characters as they navigate their feelings, potential conflict between their kingdoms, and how to keep their relationship a secret until they can figure it all out.

The main characters: Ilua, an elf and prince of Luceras and Akoni, a Deorum and prince of Tuath De.

This story takes place in a world of my own creation called Miotas, which draws on Celtic mythology and folklore. It includes a generous amount of magic to balance out the politics, and as with all of my writing, the romance is light and fun. Spoiler alert: there’s a happy ending.

Other fun stuff:

Elven pride getting in the way of a lot of things

Instant attraction

A little bit of deception since Akoni first meets Ilua whilst he's disguised as someone else to sneak into the Deorum kingdom.

Fun tropey romance!

Magic, who doesn’t love magic?

Overcoming prejudices.

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And I’ll stop myself there otherwise this is going to be way too long.

I’ve seen people use taglists, as I’m just starting out I don’t have one existing but if you’d like to be added to one please just let me know and I’ll do so ^.^ Specify a story, or just go all in and get tagged for everything and anything I say about these stories. I’m also looking for other writers to just chat with about original writing, as coming from a fanfic background I’ve been struggling to find that, so please feel free to drop me a DM if you wanna chat

Thanks for reading <3

[ronanlynchdefender]

An Asexual Reading of Gansey

A little while ago, I made a post saying Gansey should’ve been ace “because reasons” and then I decided to write a post detailing those reasons and here it is.

As someone who is ace, I think many ace-spec (and aro-spec) people conceptualize our romantic and platonic relationships differently than allo people might. When reading The Raven Cycle, I personally related to Gansey and how he thinks and feels about his friendships with the raven boys. Had Gansey been written as an asexual character, I think it would’ve added another layer of nuance to the unique ways in which he views these platonic relationships.

"What has he possibly done to deserve such a thing?" Helen demanded. "Are you sleeping with him?" Indignation cooled his voice. "Because friendship isn't worthy enough?" (The Raven King, pg. 303)

Gansey prioritizes his platonic relationships just as much as his romantic relationships. In fact, Gansey’s primary concerns in the entire series (aside from finding Glendower) are his intense (and often tumultuous) friendships. His friends are such a priority that he brides the headmaster in order to guarantee that Ronan gets his high school diploma. Helen assumes that only a romantic or sexual connection would motivate someone to do something so extreme, but Gansey pushes back on this idea. For Gansey, friendship is just as worthy and just as important as any other relationship. The words,  "just a friend," are meaningless in a Gansey world. If Richard Campbell Gansey III chooses you as his close friend, he will go to the ends of the ley line for you.

I think this is something that ace-spec and aro-spec people can relate to because we may also place higher value in our friendships just like Gansey does. Just because we don’t experience romantic or sexual feelings in the same way as everyone else, or at all, doesn’t mean we won’t still do batshit crazy things for other people.

For an ace or aro-spec person, platonic relationships can be just as strong as romantic or sexual relationships are for allo people. 

“Do you not want me to come?” Something stuck in Gansey’s throat. “I would take all of you anywhere with me.” (The Raven Boys, pg. 163)

This is just an absolutely beautiful line, and what makes it so is that Gansey truly means it. It’s so sincere and vulnerable. The things that Gansey values most in his life are his friendships, and he just wants all of them to be together forever. Besides finding Glendower, his dream in life is to literally live with all his friends in Monmouth. He begs Adam to move in with them. And I KNOW I am not the only ace-spec or aro-spec person who dreams about living in a big house with all their closest friends.

What was it about Blue? Adam was not suspicious of her, and he was suspicious of everyone. But then again, he was clearly infatuated. That, too, was unfamiliar ground for Gansey. (The Raven Boys, pg. 201)

In these couple of chapters when Adam asks Blue out with the guys and they find Cabeswater for the first time, Gansey is confused about Adam’s feelings toward Blue. There are a few interpretations: Gansey is jealous of Adam because he is attracted to Blue; Gansey is jealous of Blue because he is in love with Adam. Both of these interpretations are, of course, not mutually exclusive.

Regardless of any jealousy or attraction he may or may not be feeling in this scene, Gansey is genuinely confused because Adam liking a girl so openly is inconsistent with his perception of Adam. It is exactly as Gansey says. Adam doesn’t trust people.  To see Adam trust another person so suddenly and inexplicably in Gansey’s eyes is disconcerting to say the least.

At the door to the helicopter, Gansey looked back over his shoulder at them, his smile complicated when he saw them holding hands. (The Raven Boys, pg. 196)

Obviously, Adam has a crush on Blue, but this isn’t easy for Gansey to wrap his head around. It's easy for Gansey to conceptualize that Adam may admire this strange and quirky girl from afar at Nino's, but seeing them physically close after only 2 or 3 encounters utterly puzzles him.

I feel like a lot of ace-spec and aro-spec people can relate to the confusion around sudden attraction. We ask totally reasonable questions such as how do you know you like someone after only having one or two conversations with them?

If Gansey was written as asexual, one could interpret this scene as Gansey not understanding the nature of Adam's romantic or sexual attraction to Blue. It would not be Adam’s crush that puzzles Gansey but also the idea of crushes altogether.

[Side note: Just imagine a version of Raven Boys where Gansey is lamenting the downfall of his queerplatonic relationship with Adam because Adam has a crush on a girl. It’s not even too far off from what actually happens in the books. Lmao]

“We’re friends at once, we would instantly do what friends would do for each other. Not just pals. Friends. Blood brothers. You just feel it. We instead of you and me. That’s jeong.” Gansey was aware on a certain level that the description was melodramatic, heightened, illogical. But on a deeper level, it felt true, and familiar, and like it explained much of Gansey’s life. It was how he felt about Ronan and Adam and Noah and Blue. With each of them, it had felt instantly right: relieving. Finally, he thought, he’d found them. We instead of you and me. (The Raven King, pg. 360)

How interesting that Gansey bonds with Henry Cheng, The Raven Cycle’s most aroace-coded character, about the concept of platonic soulmates. This point is pretty self-explanatory. I feel like a lot of ace and aro-spec people relate to the concept of platonic soulmates.

In conclusion, I think making Gansey asexual could’ve added another layer of nuance to the already nuanced relationships he has with all of the members of the gangsey. While it is evident in certain scenes that Gansey was not intended to be an ace-coded character, I still resonate with the ways Gansey feels about his relationships.

Also, I know I wrote about ace and aro-spec people in general for this post, but this is mainly from my own personal perspective so obviously the points I make are not necessarily representative of the entire community.

If any other aces (or aros) are reading this, let me know if you relate or if this is just a me thing. I’m curious to hear what other people think about this topic.

[pinkrifle]

If you're still taking requests, could I please get headcanons for the main 4 boys, Butters, and Wendy reacting to finding out reader is aro/ace? If that's too many characters then just Kenny, Butters, and Wendy would be fine.

— Kenny, Butters and Wendy finding out reader is AroAce! —

cws/tw’s: sex jokes/questions made by kenny

a/n: heyyy! thank you for the option of just the 3, i was kind of having trouble with writing cartman and kyle 😭 <3 i hope u enjoy this!! i loterally love writing for tyese 3 ty for requesting them ☹️☹️🫶🫶🫶

misc. notes: characters can be interpreted as any age, this is not supposed to be a sexual post at all!! gender is not specified, post will be platonic since not specified ^^ :3

— Kenny !!

doesn’t really care what you identify as as long as your not cartman (/j) but he’s still kinda clueless on what aro/ace is.

when you explain it to him he specifically listens to the asexual part of it, surprised when he finds out it means you have no sexual drive.

“YOU CANT HAVE SEX?? ☹️” “i mean your kind of on the right track?.. i just, dont want to”

definitely does not get it at all since he’s a big F-boy, but respects your nonchalant life. at least you won’t have to put up with annoying wives or nagging husbands forever.

gets more low-key with the dirty jokes, acts like it’s a deathly offense to you and says sorry when he says something dirty (or just whispers it to his friends), even if you don’t mind it he’s still cautious.

doesn’t know if he should talk about relationships that much with you, but you really don’t care since it doesn’t, and won’t involve you.

when someone flirts with you he sweeps in infront of you and acts all super man 😭 “VERY FINE CHOICE OF ATTRACTION BUT THEY ARE OFF LIMITS FOREVER 🙅‍♂️😙” it makes u giggle a little, then you tell the person your super not interested and kenny’s happy and pats himself on the back for his “hard work”

if you make a dirty joke around him he’ll laugh 100x more than before you came out to him, it’s just funny watching you make those jokes when he 100% knows you mean none of it (unlike him)

a little dumb on the subject but he’s got the spirit, hates when people flirt with you as much as you do!!! if your shy and get hit on he’ll drag you away and blow a muffled raspberry to the person

ACTS LIKE MYSTERION WHEN SOMEONE FLIRTS WITH YOU OR TRIES TO GET WITH U 😭 and if he is mysterion and he see’s someone doing that he’ll stand next to you and put his hands on his hips, motioning for the person to go away (even if you can perfectly do it by yourself)

kind of just goes on with his life after you tell him, he doesn’t really care but he does think your neat!! even tho he’s prone to crushing on everyone he probably loses his (romantic) love for you after a while.

— Butters !!

gets the hang of it super fast and is kind of protective of you when hanging around clyde and stuff, is okay with you “not being able to like someone”

kind of gets it mixed up with you not wanting to date FOREVER instead of just feeling very slow/little attraction, but the more you remind him he more he tries to screw it in his head.

he doesn’t focus much on sex and stuff like kenny does, so the asexual part is mostly just extra info from you. but he is a little bit of a lover boy (to other girls/boys) so he does get confused on that little to no romantic attraction part, (he’s still respectful <3 MY BELOVED)

if someone flirts with you he’s all like “woah fella !! they are off limits today!! move along please!!” and hates when people do dirty pick up lines on you, he just tugs on your sleeve and makes an angry face at the person

sympathizes with you more than anyone else, but he still has no idea what it is. he’s just happy his friend wanted to share a piece of sacred information with them, and just because of that he feels much better revealing his marjorine side to u. (are u lgb cuz ur gun pink… /ref)

accidentally outs you to a few people, thinking it’s a good thing but it kinda makes you upset since you don’t want it to be shared with EVERYONE. definitely apologizes 100000 times <\3 butters just wants to give the world to his bestie, but sometimes he does weigh you down

looks it up on his computer every once in a while, just to learn more about it. googles how to make a lgbt friend feel comfortable and he does some of the steps pretty wonky 😭

asks you about your identity a lot, like when you figured it out and what are the pro’s and con’s? this man is such a talker, he loves his friends and would do anything to make them feel okay (even tho nobody does it to him ☹️)

when his parent’s think you guys are dating he almost explains it to them without asking, but he encourages you to tell them you have no attraction to anyone at all. and if your uncomfortable saying it then he does it for you!!

educates himself on more things in the lgbtq community rather than aroace, it kind of bores him but anything to keep his little brain going!!

tries to not talk about it when your upset, or jus not to much in general since he doesn’t wanna look like he’s just getting gay bff points. he doesn’t care about your sexuality!! he just wants to have someone to play hello kitty adventure with, and being aroace doesn’t stop you from doing much 🫶

— Wendy !!

UNDERSTNDS IT SM since she is super educated on a lot of things and is an expert at comforting her friends, she has no problems figuring out what it means and trying to help you in the best ways possible.

doesn’t know if she should talk about her relationship with stan/bebe (depending on if u like either ship LAWL) and isn’t afraid to ask if your comfy with her talking about her struggles and non struggles.

if your comfortable with it then she’ll talk about it but tries to not be so bold about it, just small problems and if you give her advice on how to deal with them she’s forever grateful.

if your uncomfortable with it she reassures you it’s no problem and she’ll try her best to sympathize with you and your identity as much as she can.

if someone flirts with you she politely tells them your off limits, and if they keep doing it she goes mama bear mode and tells them to stop. she won’t hesitate to kick someone’s ass to make you comfy!!

never dares to even think about outing you, makes sure your comfortable and feel welcome whenever your coming out to more people with her. doesn’t push you to do anything regarding coming out!!!!

she feels like she doesn’t know more about it and always takes time out of her day to research more on the topic, what’s offensive and what’s not so she won’t fuck up and make you upset one day.

makes sure all her friends know not to flirt with you, trying her best not to out you. let’s you come out to her friends yourself and always corrects someone if they try to make a move on you.

always takes care of people if their making you upset, nobody fucks with her besties >:(

supports u during pride month and buys you all this pride stuff, she’s the typa girl to see something rainbow and text it/ show it to you saying “it’s rainbow i thought of you :)”

buys you all pride flags you want, if you have homophobic parents that don’t like the fact your being accepted for your identity she offers to keep the pride stuff at her house and jus gives it to you when you want it.

THIS WAS SO FUN TO WRITE !!! I HAD LIKE LITTLE TO NO TROUBLE FOR THESE 3 <3 sorry this was like 8 hours late omfg ☹️ i try to get everything done within one day ^^

[polyamorousmood]

can you be a teenager and be polyamorous?

this sounds like a silly question, but can i explain real quick-

so i’m, ofc, a teenager, and i’ve never actually been in any kind of romantic relationship before, or even kissed anyone - not that i don’t want to, my parents are just homophobic - and idk, i think i’m polyam, but… like, am i allowed to be, if i’m a teenager? i’m ace and i already know i don’t want any kind of sexual relationship w/ anyone, and i know that polyamory is often only seen as a sexual thing by a lot of the general public, so maybe that’s why i’ve seen so much stuff online saying that kids can’t be polyam as it’s inherently sexual (i don’t think it always is), or the classic ‘they’re too young to know’ but i just feel like they’re right sometimes, like, i haven’t had the experience and years and stuff that adults have had, and that makes me feel like an idiot for even wanting anything to do w/ this part of the community.

except… it’s like. when i think of being older and married or in a relationship, i always think of it being someone who’s not a man (i’m a nonbinary lesbian), but like, i also think of it as more than one person? like. i’d be happy w/ two wives i think. or a partner who has a partner, that i’m not dating, esp since i’m ace and not of course everyone else is and everyone has different needs wants in a relationship. and while these are obviously just thoughts, i’ve also put. like. a lot of thought into it, and the traditional relationship structure (monogamous man/woman) doesn’t really seem like something that work for me. like also bc i’m aro and i could have a qpr but i wouldn’t mind if it was w/ more than one person or if my partner had like a date or other qpr partner or like… you get the gist. not even ‘wouldn’t mind’ i think it’d be neat, like the traditional relationship structure just never felt like it was right for me.

idk, i’m sorry, this ask is so incoherent. i just. wanted to know if i could be teenage and polyam, or if there’s something wrong w/ me and my thinking for wanting to be so, like i honestly don’t know if there is, and it’s not great sometimes, wanting to use a label for yourself in your head and not knowing if you… can

TL;DR (and it will be long): you can be whatever you feel, at any stage of life, forever. So, yeah, it could be other things, but if that's how your feeling, it doesn't really matter if you change your mind later. You can be it now.

So here's the thing: you do have a lot going on. All teenagers do, and as much as adults condescend to teenagers about it, the only way to figure it out for you personally is for you --personally-- to stumble through it. And you're clearly a bit overwhelmed. That's chill and normal. As stressful as it is, try not to stress it; these are all things that will be okay once the dust has settled.

When I was a teen, I didn't want to touch anyone. I thought I was ace. I barely even wanted a romantic relationship. Now I want several high-sex romantic relationships. I changed in that. I haven't changed in other ways, such as not wanting kids. Everyone told me I'd want them eventually, and here I am as an established adult, happily childless.

If you think you're poly now, you're allowed to call yourself poly! If you wanna say you're "questioning poly" or "interested in exploring" poly that's fine, too, in the same way bi people sometimes go "I'm mean I'm pretty sure I'm bi because my gender people SO HOT but some days I'm not feeling it and I've never actually had gay sex soooo for now I'm just going to call myself bicurious". And a lot of people will probably tell you you're too young to know, but that's not going to change how you feel. Maybe you'll grow in a different direction. Maybe you'll have a 10 year headstart on happiness that everyone on poly forums wishes they had. Both of those things sound fine to me. Those are both 👌👍✅ outcomes.

You can also want all those things and not consider yourself poly. Maybe you're just meant to join a commune 🤷

The point of labels is for you to be able to describe your experience, not to define you. If you think "poly" is an adequate word to describe the experience of "ace but wanting to build my life with multiple close women" then go for it! You could also describe yourself as other things to other people. Like, if you're in a very queer environment like Tumblr, you might feel comfortable saying "I wanna be in a poly lesbian QPR!" but to conservative adults you might just stick to "I'm not looking to get married too quick, its just going to be me and my best girl friends for awhile!" and to someone who's trying to understand but really isn't getting it you might choose to describe it as "I'm trying to found-family-trope my life. Like, we're not sexual, but we're everything for each other, you know?"

So I guess to wrap this up back to you initial question: "poly" isn't inherently sexual, and you can use it to describe anything you think it applies to, yourself especially. However, it may carry that connotation with others, so it might be a lot of trouble (up to you whether its worth that trouble) to identify yourself as that to those people. In your own head? do whatever the fuck you want lmao I'm not the thought police🚫🚓

Use them terms -- "poly" included -- when they suit you. Be that the current mood, the current conversation, the current stage in life, whatever.

[aroace-thoughts]

(They/She)

Hello hello! I don't know where to go since finding out about this label &..... Questioning. Hard..... I am on the asexual spectrum & in a polyam relationship. But ever since finding this label (AroAce) & going through others experiences & even a thing with like, 41 questions to ask yourself?? I.... Check off a lot of the AroAce stuff & feel so sad. :( I told my NP partner that I might be & we both cried cuz we're both scared of what this means/could mean. I'm still trying to figure it out. I am scared as I don't want to feel alone or grow old alone. My NP is the only person I have thought about marrying & I love the idea of romance & romantic gestures! Yet I also see it as stuff you can do with a friend. Like picnics, poems, songs, cuddling etc. I haven't really ever had a crush, but more a confused set of feelings of wanting to be closer but without the romance. Yet I grew up in and out of relationships because I wanted to be close, they had a crush on me and everyone around me said that I must have a crush on them because I'm so "flirty". I never know when people are flirting with me & I don't flirt. I joke or give genuine compliments. I just don't understand & don't want to hurt my two girlfriends. :( I care for them & love them, but I am not sure if it was ever romantically or just a "Hey you're supposed to marry your best friend & do stuff with em forever". Am I making sense? I am so sorry. I keep crying about this. I don't want to hurt anyone but I also don't want to be alone. I also think I love my NP like the way people say they love their spouses but I don't know because it's just a really strong feeling of wanting my best friend around me forever. She means everything to me & I love having her in my life. I wanna have my hand held, I wanna be kissed on my hands and face. I wanna be cuddled but I also wanna have my own bedroom, yet share a house with someone. If it doesn't happen I'll be fine. I.... I don't know how to explain it all. I wanna experience romance but how does one do that when all they ever felt was confusion, longing & a strong (platonic?) feeling for certain friends? I'm sorry for rambling. Thank you for listening. If you have any questions I'll answer them under the same name

- Confused Bambi

Hello, Bambi!

Firstly, wow that is a lot to deal with, it must be very difficult to go through. Please don’t apologise for feeling the way you’re feeling. I’m offering you lots of hugs if you need them and am happy to be a listening ear.

Often, even just writing all these thoughts and fears and emotions out can be a huge help in clearing your head. Taking deep breaths, going on a calm walk, giving your feelings the space they need, having a conversation and getting things off your chest is often the first step in figuring out what you need and what you may need to change to be happy, so you’re doing a great job already.

My main thing I want to say to you is being aroace doesn’t have to be a bad or sad thing. If you don’t want to be alone, you don’t have to be alone. If you want your own bedroom and also want your NP to be in your life and hold her hand and live with her, that’s something you can do. You and your partners are the only ones who can decide how you want your relationship to look like. (Whether romantic, or platonic, or queerplatonic, or anything else.) That can sound very scary, especially if you’re confused and unsure, but can also be a great thing and give you freedom!

You and your girlfriends clearly care a lot about each other, and from what it sounds like you have a lot of trust and communication in your relationship where you feel safe and comfortable talking to your NP about this. That’s really good and really beautiful, and not something to take for granted.

Many aro and ace people are in happy relationships that look exactly like they and their partner(s) want them to look like. There are as many relationship types in this world as there are people in relationships, all are unique to the people in them.

Also, I hope you know you don’t always need a word or a label if it’s causing you stress or fear. A lot of these words can seem very big and final and overwhelming… The word “romance” for example doesn’t have to have a big meaning if that doesn’t serve you. Take lots of time, and continue communicating and listening, and you’ll be fine.

There are no rules in life except for your happiness and wellbeing.

[booksdogsmagicandmore]

This is an Imogen appreciation post.

A lot of people get really frustrated with Imogen’s pursuit of Nick, and I totally get it, but she ends up being such an amazing character and here’s why:

1. I actually love at the party when she tells Nick “I really like you. You don’t have to reply right now, I just wanted you to know.” That’s such a healthy way to tell someone that you like them, there’s no pressure and it gives them time to process. (She does get it wrong later by asking Nick out in front of everyone, but to be fair Harry was pressuring her)

2. She doesn’t freak out when Nick cancels the date day of, which at that age is a miracle.

3. She takes the rejection so well and maturely. Like yeah, she’s a bit confused and upset. It’s never easy to hear that someone doesn’t like you back, but she doesn’t get mad and she immediately backs off and they even manage to going back to being friends.

4. She thanks Nick for telling her he doesn’t like her. She’s able to appreciate good communication and she probably knows that wasn’t easy for him to say. It also shows that she was genuinely interested in a mutual relationship with Nick, she didn’t just want him to be with her for her sake.

5. I think I truly began to love Imogen when she tells the rugby lads “I just think I can do better.” Let me explain: there’s this idea that all guys want a relationship at all times and any guy who says no must be gay or something. Like, girls are allowed to be picky or just not be into a guy without their sexuality being questioned. But I’ve heard so many ace guys talk about how there’s this expectation that as guys they must want sex at all times, so saying no to the opportunity for it brings their manhood into question. It’s this awful combination of compulsory heteronormativity and toxic masculinity. So if Imogen had told the truth when the rugby lads were asking about it, that would put Nick in an awkward position. And I think, to some extent, Imogen knows this. Maybe only subconsciously, she understands that it would look bad for Nick if it came out that Nick rejected her. I don’t think she suspected he wasn’t straight yet, but she had the emotional intelligence to lie and say she rejected him. No one’s gonna question her for that. And she made it a joke, which helped ease the tension.

6. Her little smile when Nick leads Charlie off the field. An ally indeed.

7. I love that Nick was allowed to not be into Imogen without his bisexuality being questioned. Just because you can feel attraction to a gender doesn’t mean you feel attraction to all people of that gender. And it wasn’t even, ‘I can’t because I’m dating someone else’ it was ‘I just don’t like you like that.’

It would’ve been really easy to turn Imogen into a villain, the evil girl trying to break up the couple, but Alice managed to write her with so much maturity and I just love that (not that I’m surprised). I know of so many shows where a girl interferes with the otp and the fandom immediately hates her, and Alice really said, not today, and made her such a good character.

I hope she’s still around in season 2 as a side character, although I’ll admit I don’t want to see a love story for her (if I wanted to see an unnecessary cis het romance I’d put on any other show on the planet). I’d love to see her incorporated into the friend group.

Oh I’m so not ready for season 2!

[kisses-for-kai]

Kai’s orientation, emotional intimacy and how he falls in love… (Canon x OC)

• Personally, I picture Kai being on the ace spectrum. More specifically I write him as Grey ace / Demi-romantic

• He obviously has no idea he’s on the ace spec though, considering the traditional and toxic masculine environment he grew up in

• I don’t think romance has been on his mind at all his entire life, but I think being emotionally (and physically) distant from everyone adds to that. Like there’s no reason to form a crush if you’re not attracted to physical appearance. And you can’t form a crush from getting to know someone if you’re not close to anyone new like that.

• Given that, finding a partner for Kai seems pretty much out of the question

• But I like writing that chance meeting Kai has with Cupid (and it’s far from anything romantic, and love at first sight is NEVER gonna work out for anyone ace spec)

• From that chance meeting, Cupids able to put that foot in the door and talk to Kai regularly after that, and her personality is both confusing and alien to anything Kai’s been around

• The first handful of times Kai talks to Cupid is cautious, investigative and (while he masks it well) untrusting

• But Cupids persistence for company allows Kai to talk to Cupid long enough to understand she’s not accompanying him for an ulterior motive, but she comes off as a nuisance at best

• Being around her feels harmless but a waste of time, and the only reason he talked to her as often as he did was to keep a courteous (and unsuspecting) reputation out in broad daylight

• That dynamic immediately shifts when Cupids able to have a meaningful conversation with him, and he realizes she’s more intelligent than he gave her credit for.

• And I think that’s the initial component needed for Kai to be attracted to someone emotionally: being fascinated by their mind and admiring their intelligence

• Suddenly his perception of Cupid changes to a spark of admiration and fascination. Little building blocks to help form an emotional bond with her.

• The more they can delve into these nuanced, and complex conversations the closer Kai feels towards Cupid. It’s a foreign feeling of being reassured that someone understands you on a profound level

• They talk about the nuance of the world around them, the flaws of hero society, the frustrating realization that everyone around them thinks in binary, the psychology for peoples hero or villain complex, what life was before quirks, and numerous topics that allow prospecting and theorizing

• Cupid takes the first step in showcasing vulnerability to Kai, and trusts him with info she wouldn’t normally tell others.

• She tells him her own fears, pressures and issues brought up from the status quo; and then she delves more into her own personal life, her familys unique history with heroes and villains and how that’s impeded her own growth and sanity

• She let’s him feel safe and trusted, and he’s able to tell her his own feelings… (while he’s still emotionally stunted and lacking better introspection) it’s relieving that the first thing Cupid does is listen, and sympathize with him. She doesn’t downplay his feelings, and he starts to understand what being loved can possibly mean.

• He realizes his relationship to Cupid is drastically different than any other he’s had. For the longest time Kai understood relationships were transactional. A formal give and take. That’s how it’s always been since he was taken in by the Shie, that’s how he treats everyone else around him, friend or foe. But Cupid entirely contradicts that principle.

• And it makes his world spin as he realizes what kind of relationship he’s developed with Cupid in just a span of months.

• Being able to talk to Cupid in a way that he can’t with others is incredibly cathartic. It’s a level of comfort he wasn’t aware he could achieve, and he feels closer to Cupid because of that

• It’s incredibly reassuring to be heard, and to have someone build up from his thoughts and further the conversation

• And being vulnerable with his thoughts is an entirely new experience, instead of holding back his tongue, without being told he’s crazy or out of line for thinking the way he does.

• for Kai to be able to talk to Cupid like that is a huge step forward for emotional intimacy and being intrigued by her intelligence, and her ability to articulate really is what makes Kai realize the relationship he has with Cupid is romantic, and that’s how he falls in love with her

[chimerickat]

Hey, do you have/do any platonic writing for Reader and Kaiba? I’m aro ace so I’m not into romance. (And frankly, Kaiba seems aggressively aro ace to me, but I understand that there are tons of girls with crushes who desperately want that to not be true, so obviously there’s a much larger market for romantic stuff.) But SOMEHOW, over the last year, I’ve developed such a squish (platonic crush) on this disaster of a man.

I just want to be friends. I want to help him make virtual reality games, and slowly grow to be friends because we have shared interests, mutually feel protective of Mokuba, and are both needlessly theatrical. Kaiba would show me the cool stuff he’s working on, and I would be suitably impressed and give good feedback like a sensible person, but also, when Kaiba tells me things like he wants to launch Duel Monsters cards into space so if there are aliens they’ll learn how to play his favorite game, I’m like, “That is ridiculous, but I love ridiculous things because I too am ridiculous. Also, that is a dope idea and you should do it immediately.”

I don’t want to fix him, I just want to largely ignore his past and have adventures and become someone he trusts. And we’ll have a great time helping each other out and problem solving for twenty years or so—at which point the Ener-D Reactor will blow up and ruin everything. I don’t know what you headcanon as happening to Kaiba at that point. Personally, I imagine he ends up being the public scapegoat for all the destruction, is bared from using his technological know-how to help the newly formed Satellite, and is found guilty in a kangaroo court. I can’t bring myself to accept that he would probably be executed, so I say he’s sentenced to live in Satellite for the rest of his days, separated from Mokuba and having lost most of his worldly possessions. (Maybe he owns a house in the area that became Satellite, and he gets to keep it and his cards?) And uh, realistically, that event will be my own downfall as well, because everyone knows I’m his friend, and heck, my name is probably in the documentation for the first Ener-D Reactor somewhere. But let’s be real, I knew from the beginning it was dangerous to befriend Seto Kaiba, and I did it anyway. 🤷‍♀️

Hi! *Waves* Thanks for reaching out! :) I can see an aro-ace reading of Kaiba. (Overall I try to be supportive of headcanons for Kaiba but an aro-ace reading is one that I can vibe with.)

First, I’m going to recommend a fic by someone else because I think it’s more what you’re looking for and I am reading and enjoying.

Acquaintances by JoeyTaylor is a reader insert focused on Kaiba and Mokuba that doesn’t have any romance at all.

Now as to me personally…

How to Trick a Sick CEO is a very short one shot that can be read as the reader being an overly meddlesome best friend. The idea was romantic partner but there’s nothing in the actual text that states that.

Maybe Someday has a reader who is Not Interested in Kaiba romantically. However Kaiba is interested in her so you might not vibe with that.

Here’s a link to all of my Kaiba centric work without any romance at all. It’s not Reader insert stuff though:

I also have some recs by other people if Kaiba centric is stuff you enjoy.

If you like my writing, I’m definitely open to writing a reader insert for Kaiba where the relationship is best friends. :)

ALSO, if you’re open to fics where the romance is Not the plot but rather a background that you can ignore, I would like to try to sell you on A Handful Of Bullet Shells. We are 50k into the story and you have to squint real hard for any romance. It’s more about the relationship developing between Kaiba and the reader ( who is working on one of his games). Right now they’ve gotten to a point where they’re friendly (and I don’t mean wink wink friendly). Eventually there will be romance but it’s not going to be the focus. (Disclaimer: I try to sell this fic because I think it’s my best work when it comes to Kaiba’s characterization but I also feel the lack of romance due to that makes it less popular.)

Also, Virtual Remains is a thriller and based on my current plans you can skip the last chapter because that’s the only place any hint of romance will show its face. (I’m not even there yet. I just don’t see any romance featuring in this until like the very very end and even skipped the romance tag because of it.)

Posting this publicly because my followers may have other platonic Kaiba recs?

[pageofheartdj]

Hi! Autistic aroace anon from before! I saw your post abt ace Donnie and aro Leo (which btw, I LOVE how their colors are basically their flags? But in Leo’s case it’s his green tone)

And I totally agree!! Donnie seems to have somewhat interest in romance, like the innuendo at the Bearnardo “why I always like the cute and mean ones” and with Atomic Lass. But a teen flirty normal level (thank god, I also agree with you at the “pls they dont care yet, its hormones. Pls focus family and friends), than to actually have smth not rlly, and the arosexual part? I may be projecting a lil here. But he always seemed more interested in the flirt part than anything else.

With Leo, he liked to flirt, but more to charm the person to gain their favor than actually flirt, like in Donnie’s case. He always seemed averse, but not against it, just “yuck”. I felt that was also a normal teen reaction like “I don’t wanna get strings attached” but with smth more, a “yeah, rlly not for me” thing. I can totally see him being gray/demi aro (again projecting? I’m gray/demi aroace), since with some stuff he seems fine but with others, more exaggerated or “honeyed” ones, he gets uncomfortable. But I could understand if ppl put him on sex-repulsed full Aro in the spectrum.

It’s totally wild and funny to me how the fandom is rlly 8/80. The dynamics of both of them being switched in the fandom to fit the box idea that they created for these two is wild to me. “Oh, Donnie’s autistic and 10% of the time, specially in stressful situations, he doesn’t want to be touched? And also a genius nerd? Nah, he’s a goofy goober which the idea of relationships is totally alien and foreign to him, he totally runs from it and has 0 experience of it”. “Oh, Leo’s has narcissistic tendencies and flirted to gain favors before in specific and numbered occasions? He’s totally a flirt, believing everyone wants to date him and he’s a heartbreaker, he totally loves that attention, not uncomfortable at all”

So yeah, sorry for my lil rant, but I rlly do feel whatchu said in that post a whole lot!!

Speaking of colors, he is blue and wore that orange uniform in Air Turtles so yaknow XD

The thing is, the turtles are teens, PLUS they lived an isolated way of life. They had NO way of acting on their interests no matter if they had or didn't have any.

And also. Attraction and relationships are not connected whatsoever! They can. But they don't have to! So the allo person might not want any relationships and aspec person can want and be in one. The relationship status says NOTHING of their identity xD

And moving on to Donnie. He has crushes on fictional character and makes sense, again, no people around. But he also used this his type on Strawberry who are very real and in the moment and is very cute and is very mean to him xD Donnie has a type with real girls too. What he wants to do with this attraction and if he has any sexual attraction is unknown and obviously, it's a kid's cartoon and romance is basically a non-existant part of it(thank god xD). And anyone can hc almost any queer and not queer identity on him, because all of them can and will work xD

Same with Leo, we have some canon moments with him, but it can work for so many queer identities. He is aro as a very direct conclusion. He is grey or demi and his repulsiveness tones down if he falls for someone, etc xD He can also be just a teen who is not into romance but now it extra disgusts him. Anything can work and as long as we are not forcing our hcs on others, it's all good xD

I also hc Donnie a quick developer, he had his plastron developed first, he instalearned his mystics. He could get into the whole romance territory earlier than Leo too xD Leo might not be that enthusiastic the way Donnie is, but still!

Although Mikey doesn't seem to mind and Raph is a big supporter as a comparison xD

And yeeeeeeah I am not a fan(although I can VERY much understand) of latching on this one trait, no matter if it's a rare one or not, and making it the whole personality. Donnie is autistic and very rarely is not 100% excited for a touch? He is touch repulsed autistic. He has canon romantic interests? Nah he is aroace. (Which I LOVE aroace hcs. But I've noticed that in fandoms aroace hcs 99% mean NO romance and NO sex NEVER, even though aspec has SO much variation). With Leo he has these few sad moments and BOOM he is a 100% 24/7 sad boy that was born depressed and all that. Despite the fact that he is very joyful and very confident and very cocky most of the time. YES he copes with jokes, this doesn't mean ALL his jokes are just cover ups. Donnie's copes with collecting data, doesn't mean he doesn't do it on regular just cause he likes it. HECK both of them tend to cope with the thing they like, so they would feel better. Donnie likes data collecting so he copes with it. Leo likes joking so he copes with it.

I love your rants🤝

[alyjojo]

August 👨🏽‍🏫 2023 Monthly - Cancer

Whole of your energy: 9 Wands

It looks like your person is trying to fix the relationship with you this month, I’ve been getting a similar story for just about every sign, probably due to the Venus retrograde. Old problems come to light, ex’s come back around for some, all retrograde issues exist to heal issues that have overstayed their welcome or have been swept under the rug and need to be dealt with. Venus deals with relationships, friendships, money, and all matters of the heart. You are extremely resistant to someone that’s hurt you, 9 Wands. You’ve built a whole castle of steel around you that they can’t break through with their bs, and you go back and forth whether you’re doing the right thing or not. You do come out as a divine pair, King & Queen of Cups, and this heavily mirrors the Gemini reading I just did, you could be dealing with one or have it in your own chart.

What’s going on in August:

2 Swords:

You don’t trust this person, that much is clear. I’m not sure what they’ve done, end of the reading shows friends, family, or other outside people have caused problems between you, I assume on their side. They are making efforts towards you, to have a new beginning, and you are sitting over here with a blindfold on because you refuse to give into their trickery and mind games…assuming there are some. You’re afraid they’re fooling you. So you wait. For…🤷‍♀️

3 Pentacles:

You do cooperate with each other, I’m not sure if you you live together, have kids together, could literally work together. You’re in contact, and you’re keeping a pleasant appearance that the two of you work well together, at least to everyone else. Inside though, you’re in 9 Swords. Sleepless nights, constant stress, rumination, worry, upset, possibly giving yourself physical symptoms due to your mental state. And this Hanged Man is an energy of observation of what’s going on around you with this person, sniffing for clues it feels like, rather than communicating on both sides…which your Oracle is telling you to do. You can’t stay in this energy forever, it���ll drive you insane.

King of Cups:

This is your person. They’re not deceitful, mean, arguing, competing, none of that. They’re just calm, loving, and extremely patient, maybe they’ve already been extremely patient for some time and they’re just coasting along at this point, waiting for you to give them a chance, a date, a something. I don’t see them moving in any other directions, they’re just waiting around on you, waiting for things to change.

Ace of Cups:

A beautiful new beginning in love, with you, that’s what they want. 7 Wands comes out to show they’re willing to fight for this connection, if you’re trying to end it, they’re not having that. They want everything else to end though, the whole next row. No more drama, chaos, lack of trust, worry about being bamboozled, whatever this issue is they’re tired of that, not you. They’d rather take you out and trust that y’all can leave the rest of this baggage behind you for good.

10 Wands:

A card of baggage, all of these emotions, worries and fears you’re carrying behind you in a giant suitcase. They’re like “we are going to Hawaii, leave that shit behind”. It’s possibly you’re going out somewhere with them, and then choosing THAT moment to have some deep meaningful heart-wrenching kind of conversation about “where are we going” when they just wanna show you and actually get there. I can feel their impatience from this row, and hopefully that doesn’t hurt you, but it seems like you may take that the wrong way. It’s hard for you to be vulnerable, so if they’re shutting you down impatiently when you do, it feels like 10 Swords. I don’t think they intend to make you feel that way. They’re just like look we’ve got candles, music, a beach, strawberries, can you put the baggage down and just enjoy this PLEASE? I really get neither side being wrong here. It’s possible whatever you say really pisses them off too, especially if it has to do with their friends or people in their lives…it may be more your problem than theirs, in their mind, and they don’t know how much more they have to do for you to give them an Ace. They are very much “I’m not even asking for the 10”. None of these being major arcana, this reading could just be a way to show you how things are moving, give you some validation on their part, and you can decide to change whatever you don’t want or like in this dynamic.

Signs you may be dealing with:

Capricorn, Sagittarius, Cancer, Gemini & Pisces

Oracles: ✨

63 Passion

It will take passion for you to push through your self-criticism to get to a place of confidence.

31 Communication

The clarity, interactivity, and timing of communications is critical.

34 Ancient Wisdom 🙏

Nature is the perfect place to center yourself and ground out any excessive noise in your head. In nature, all the secrets of the universe are held: from the fiercest energy of a raging sea in a storm to the nurturing and loving energy of a hundred year old grove of trees. Get out in nature and listen to what she has to tell you. There is much to learn from nature. Trees just want to be trees. They’re not trying to be boulders. Deer are just deer 🦌 and they accept that. Wolves are wolves, they do not know any other way, they do not get an extreme makeover to become a bear. This energy vibration can be so different from the human experience. It is pure love, non judgement, and acceptance. When you tap into the ancient wisdom of the natural world, you find peace within yourselves. You get to “know thyself”. By drawing this card, you are asked to come to peace with who you are and what you have to offer this situation.

We enter into August as:

Cool Lemonade 🍋

“My dreams got answered.”

There are times when chasing dreams leaves us winded and unhappy. If this gift has been given, it’s to remind you there is always a plan. If you fear you’ve been sidetracked from your right path, have faith you’ll be guided back to it. There is not always a complicated reason why things didn’t work out how you wanted them to, it may be simpler than you think. Are you sure your prayers weren’t answered? Or was it a reply you refused to hear? You will find total peace when you appreciate the gifts you have, rather than pining for what you lack. Sometimes, we all need to be reminded that the point of prayer isn’t to get what we want, but to ask to be of service. Cool Lemonade reminds us to only seek to be of service in our lives, closeness with Spirit must always be put before what we’d like to have.

What is to be learned in August:

Princess of Amber 👸🏽:

“I quietly sizzle and shine.”

You are connecting with your passion. It is time to focus on the task at hand and not divert your attention. If you are being of service to others, you will reap great rewards. This is a sign of great abundance with selflessness. Put your eye on the work and not the rewards. You’re also being urged to stand up for what you believe in. If you are being asked to compromise yourself, you must not. You are correct to feel passionate about your position, you know intuitively what a fair request is. When your intentions are good and true, you will always land with two feet on the ground. You may be up against pretty big odds, but you mustn’t give in to what you know is not correct. Others see your worth, it’s time for you to, and have faith that you are doing the right thing.

Orange may be a lucky color 🧡

[marriedmyfandom]

Wednesday in a QPR for season 2

Okay, this started as an idle thought because someone said that aroace Wednesday would destroy her emotional/social character arc which is just ???

Like first off, you can definitely develop your social skills and how to check in with your emotions by just... making friends. Wednesday staying a single aroace but learning how to make and maintain friendship would still be character development.

But for the sake of the argument let’s pretend that you subscribe to the allo monogamous notion that for everyone there is this one (1) *special* person out there. So let her be in a QPR!!! Is my main argument for this that I finally want QPR representation, especially in mainstream media? Yes, but that doesn’t make it any less important. I  mean is that really too much to ask?

Now, I know Enid is the most prominent choice for Wednesday’s QPR and I hear and support you but may I propose Tyler...? Hear me out:

I know him saying she was sending him signals got some mixed reactions to say the least. But most people at some point deluded themselves into thinking their crush was sending them signals when their crush very much did not. And also, it’s not as if Wednesday sent anyone else non-platonic signals because she’s probably aroace. Add to that Tyler might be aroace himself but in denial so all he knows about romantic/sexual relations is what society and media taught him and the whole situation gets even more confusing

So why Tyler? (let me preface this by saying this is gonna include some self-projection but isn’t that the point?)

It’s very clear that he cares about her and is very intent on clear communication. Wednesday would always know where she stands with him and we know he has the nerve to ask her where he stands with her and is respectful of her boundaries. Which is important in any relationship but especially in a QPR. Also the fact that she kissed him shows that she felt comfortable enough to explore her own limits with him and trusts him to stop when she shows signs of discomfort because his previous actions were proof that he does.

Of course there is the issue of the Hyde but the more I think about it the more adamant I become that this is not his fault. Like he was groomed/manipulated/traumatized so much. We know he did not intentionally start everything and I would not be surprised if he  actually did not enjoy any part of it. But he was told that he did over and over again so he finally deluded himself into believing that because it gave him some sense of control. (honestly, how many groomed ppl during the relationship think that they actually want this only to later realize that they very much did not). Especially given how emotionally vulnerable he was in that entire situation.

But why should Tyler be in a QPR? I’ve stated before (on Twitter) that I believe both Tyler and Wednesday are queer. I don’t care if you call it mlm/wlw solidarity, bi4bi, QPR, ... there’s something fruity going on between these two. Now this is where the self-projection is getting heavy. The whole Hyde thing will probably cause an alienation between Tyler and his body because so much happened to his body that he had absolutely no control. And as someone whose body does a lot of stuff I have no control over because of my physical disability, let me tell you that it makes intimacy with other people complicated to unappealing (now, I have no way of knowing if I’m simply on the ace-spectrum or if sth caused by my anxiety about my temperamental body. But since I’m generally interested in it but then end up worrying myself in a frenzy about my body’s movements during something as simple as a cuddle session even though physical touch is my primary love language I’m leaning towards the latter). So Tyler would also need to be in a relationship with someone who is aware and respectful of his physical boundaries.

And that’s why I think they should be in a QPR together and will now delude myself into thinking that the show is giving us signals that it will happen even though it’s absolutely unrealistic.

[chagrin-roses]

I’m tired of antis misinterpreting media especially fucking BANANA FISH

Banana Fish Spoilers under the cut, please read at ur own risk (also mentions of SA and rape)

I came across this, and at first, I understood the annoyance, but then I look at everything else and then realized how terribly they misinterpreted Ash’s character.

I wanna preface this by saying: You are absolutely allowed to have headcanons, and you are 100% valid for controlling your online experience. You are allowed to have discomforts. I’m not shitting on anyone who doesn’t like seeing Ash depicted in any sort of sexual act or situation, regardless of the context/who he is depicted with. But your own discomforts/opinions about a FICTIONAL piece of media aren’t definitive rules/must-beliefs in regard to fandom especially. We all enjoy media differently

But that’s all, what should be, common sense. But I wanna talk about how these people could not only misinterpret Ash Lynx’s character, but the story as well.

First of all: Ash is NOT Gay, he is canonically bisexual, as stated by the creator (but also shown in the manga/anime). It is also worth noting that the people in the comments were stating that Ash is asexual(I’ll go into why this is wrong in this context, but headcanoning him as acespec isn’t the problem here)

As you can see, Ash canonically identifies as bisexual, and this image also implies, that Ash has/would engage in consensual sexual intercourse.

Some other things I wanna clarify:

- Ace ≠ SA Victim (and vice versa)

- Ace ≠ No sex/sexual attraction whatsoever

- SA Victim ≠ Inability to have healthy sexual relationships

Not only do the above screenshots show that people have a terrible concept of Asexuality as a whole, but also how trauma, and SA can impact a person. Everyone’s experiences with anything varies.

Asexuality is a spectrum. Sometimes being a SA victim and being Ace have no correlations between eachother, sometimes they do.

I also wanna note how hypocritical these antis are for using the cop out excuse of “(character) is ace!” to not depict a character a certain way, yet tell people who like certain themes in a FICTIONAL context (problematic ships, media, etc) who identify as ace are just saying that to hide the fact they are a pedophile or something.

Me and many others who identify as ace and happen to be proship/anti harassment/etc have been told we aren’t actually ace and are actually just creeps. Yet, antis jump on the (in this case not canonically stated whatsoever) “Ash is ace so you can’t sexualize him/depict him in (xyz) way!” as a excuse to push not only their purity culture agenda, but once again, this is a prime example of how people force their opinions to police everyone else and treat it like they’re laws.

Also, another excuse of “Ash is a minor! 😡” was used here which, once again, it’s fiction and two, Ash literally turns 18 during the events of the story, so if you are so worried about the safety of a character that isn’t real, it’s a dumb and ignorant excuse anyways .

I also think the general misinterpretation of not only Banana Fish as a whole, but more specifically Ash, is so incredibly present here.

Regardless of how you decide to interpret/headcanon Ash, doesn’t mean you have to force that on someone else. Fandom, and fiction, should be something enjoyable, not stressful.

And one more thing, if you can't deal with talk about certain subject matter that is depicted in the form of media itself, then maybe you shouldn't be consuming it in the first place :/

Grow up, curate your own online experience, and don't ruin something for someone else just because you're a whiny bitch who doesn't know what the block button is.

[guhamun]

card suits - headcanon meme; accepting || @dayrisen - Jianyu / Kyojuro

Ace - How easy is it for any sort of relationship to develop with your muse?

Jianyu is like…if you ever met like dogs that guard sheep during the day, they tend to be like, “eeeeeh” around strangers because they’re guards. They’re not here to be your bff during their working hours and are often less eeeeeh to you when you’ve come around a lot / the family clearly is comfortable with you. That’s basically kinda how he is. He’ll be polite to you, but just a bit distant until you start to grow on him. For some, that’s always faster than others, but at the heart of it, everything with him takes time be it a platonic or romantic when it comes to relationships. However, it’s no more than it would be with anyone else, I think. Jianyu just isn’t interested in quickly jumping into things with anyone.

Two - How often do things go well for your muse in their relationships?

He often gets along pretty well with his fellow mercenaries. He can be snarky sometimes, but he has a sense of humor that many wouldn’t expect from his demeanor. Since he’s observant, most of the time, he often notices things about others and knows how to interact with them as a result. This consideration tends to work in his favor.

Six - How does your muse handle blossoming feelings for another?

He feels a bit awkward at first as crushes for him are rare, but then he eventually either just outright tells you, “hey I like you,” to get it over and done with for his own sanity, or he brushes it aside because he believes it is either a.) unprofessional if it’s someone he is supposed to be looking after, or b.) not something he believes he needs, thus won’t pursue it and just let those feelings exist / keep on, keeping on, basically.

Ten - How does your muse act when their luck is at its absolute best?

Like he usually does fksjdhfsfs. He’s winning at gambling? He’s destroying you at card games and watching as you slowly descend into ruin with each winning hand? He still remains deadpan like this kaomoji: (¬_¬). Is that worse? Is it better he’s not laughing loudly and shit talking? We just don’t know.

Queen - Does your muse pay back kindness that is offered to them? If so, then how do they go about doing so?

He’ll oftentimes be much nicer to someone who is kind to him. He doesn’t go out of his way to be rude, but due to him being socially inept sometimes, his words can just come out as such without that intent. Either way, the change is visible to most. He’ll look after that individual more as he believes good intentions should be repaid in full.

King - Does your muse often give out advice? How do they react to being given some? for kyojuro & jianyu ! pspspspspsps

Not really. He does when he feels the need to, but overall, he lets people make their own choices and decisions. You make a bad one and he’s just (¬_¬) at you. No words. No comments. But that disappointing stare is probably worse than anything he could ever say. Now if you’re really, really close to him, if you seek his advice personally, or he’s worried / concerned about you, he will say something of his own volition. As for being given advice, he won’t brush it aside. If it is something he needs to hear or something he should be told, then he listens.

Ace - How easy is it for any sort of relationship to develop with your muse?

Pretty easy! Kyojuro is probably one of the easiest to approach muses on here as he is super friendly from the get-go. Platonic wise isn’t hard considering he gets along with people quickly due to just being such a genuinely good person at heart. Romantic isn’t bad either as you won’t be climbing up a mountain to get to that point unlike with like…literally almost everyone on here for the most part. He just is easy to talk to, and that alone makes it possible for a vast number of relationships to exist.

Two - How often do things go well for your muse in their relationships?

Well enough! I mean…all the Hashira like him. The other slayers too. If even Sanemi feels attached to him or Obani, that tells you something about how easy it is for him to just…do well with people in general.

Six - How does your muse handle blossoming feelings for another?

Loudly. He just proclaims that he believes he may have feelings for you. There won’t be any guessing game going on where you’re trying to figure out where he stands. You will know where you stand. However, this is after he has observed you for a bit and has decided that yes, he will indeed tell you how he feels – that is if you don’t beat him to it first.

Ten - How does your muse act when their luck is at its absolute best?

Man idk…Kyojuro is just…so bright and sunny that this literally does not change.

Queen - Does your muse pay back kindness that is offered to them? If so, then how do they go about doing so?

VERY MUCH, YES. Kindness is always repaid by Kyojuro. His mother placed great emphasis on this when he was a child and it has remained present within him ever since. If you let him have lodgings at your home, he will help with cleaning or assisting with any tasks you need be it chopping wood or cleaning vegetables. He’s that person in a game that’s given the most mundane boring quest like, ‘pick these leeks’ and he’s joyfully already on it.

King - Does your muse often give out advice? How do they react to being given some? for kyojuro & jianyu ! pspspspspsps

He does! He feels like he must! This is especially so for younger slayers. Any and all advice he is given is taken to heart depending on what that is. If he deems it as sound, then he will be sure to heed it.