#jimmy you can’t keep doing this king 3< /div>
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#IM NOT SANE ABOUT THIS SESSION#i can’t believe all their curses are still going strong#jimmy you can’t keep doing this king </3#i made grian look like the bad boys’ fate rests on him but in reality he immediately switched teams lmao#but hey what’s an mcyt post without being a bit dramatic#limited life smp#lilsmp#mcyt#grian#jimmy solidarity#solidaritygaming#smallishbeans#mcyt fanart#trafficblr#traffic series#limited life#life series#24lsmp#limited life spoilers#sopuuart#good soup
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Rating band names based on their accuracy:
(I keep updating this list so check back later)
The Beatles: 3/10. None of these people are beetles, they’re just a bunch of fruity guys from Liverpool with matching haircuts
(Edit: changed from 0/10 to 3/10 because John Lennon beat his wife)
Pink Floyd: 4/10. There is not a single person named Floyd in the band, but some of the members do arguably look kinda pink
Nirvana: 10/10. Getting high and listening to Nirvana is roughly what I imagine actual nirvana to be like
Foo Fighters: either 0/10 or 10/10. I have never seen foo in real life so either they’re pretending to fight a problem that doesn’t exist or they’re doing an absolutely fantastic job of fighting it
The Eagles: 0/10. Same as the Beatles, there is not a single eagle in this band. The name is misleading and we have all been lied to
Queen: 6/10. Partial points for Freddie Mercury
Led Zeppelin: 0/10. I don’t think any of these guys have ever even seen a zeppelin, let alone one made of lead. A lead balloon would crash faster than my hopes and dreams
The Rolling Stones: 3/10. There is not a single stone in this band. Some points added because I’m pretty sure they rolled quite a few
U2: 0/10. Despite what the name says, I am not a member of this band
Metallica: 9/10. Naming a metal band “Metallica” is like naming your dog “doggy”
Red Hot Chili Peppers: 2/10. These guys are not chili peppers. They’re not even that hot, let alone red hot
Guns N’ Roses: 0/10. How the fuck could a gun or a flower play music
Backstreet Boys: ?/10. Depends entirely on their current given location
Simon and Garfunkel: 10/10. No notes
The Doors: 1/10. Jim Morrison is kinda shaped like a door tho
Chicago: 4/10. The number of people in this band does not come even remotely close to the population of Chicago. Points added because it originated in Chicago
Earth, wind, and fire: 2/10. This is even more innacurate than Chicago. Points added because wind instruments were often used
Def Leppard: 3/10. There is not a single leopard in this band. Some of the members are probably kinda deaf by now tho
The Beach Boys: ?/10. Accuracy depends entirely on location
The Black Eyed Peas: 6/10. Not sure what the hell an ‘eyed pea’ is but the black part is pretty accurate
Imagine Dragons: ?/10. Depends entirely on whether or not they’re thinking about dragons.
Cage the Elephant: 1/10. Why would you do that. Let the elephant go
Green Day: 0/10. They’re not even green
The Police: 0/10. There is not a single cop in this band
KISS: 5/10. I’m sure they probably kissed sometimes
The Monkees: 0/10. Are you fucking kidding me
We Butter the Bread with Butter: 8/10. I can’t verify this but I have no reason to suspect that they’d lie. Butter seems like the most logical thing to butter bread with
King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard: 0/10. I got really excited about the concept of a lizard wizard only to be let down. My disappointment is immeasurable
They Might Be Giants: 5/10. I googled everyone in this band’s height, the tallest guy’s only 6’1 so I wouldn’t exactly consider him a giant. Then again, I can’t really argue because the claim was only that they MIGHT be giants
The Presidents of the United States of America: 2/10. None of these people are Joe Biden nor are any of them former presidents. This is incredibly misleading. I’m pretty sure “Lump” was written about my first girlfriend tho so I’ll give them a point or two
Gorillaz: 2/10 Not quite but we’re kinda close genetically so I’ll give them partial credit
The Killers: ?/10. I have no way of verifying if they’ve actually killed before but the fact that they’re not in prison tells me probably not
The Offspring: 10/10. These guys are definitely somebody’s offspring
Arctic Monkeys: 1/10. They are neither monkeys nor are they from the arctic
Thirty Seconds to Mars: 1/10. It takes WAY longer to get to mars than that
Beastie Boys: 8/10. They’re pretty beast on the guitar
Jimmy Eat World: 1/10. Slow the fuck down Jimmy, you’re biting off way more than you can chew
Hole: 9/10. One point deducted because I’m pretty sure they had more than one hole
Rage Against the Machine: 10/10. They did exactly that
Alice In Chains: 0/10. This is illegal. Let Alice go
The Band: 10/10. This could not possibly be more accurate
Nine Inch Nails: 1/10. I can’t find any good pictures of their feet but from what I can tell their fingernails definitely aren’t nine inches long
Bush: ?/10. Not quite sure about this one, felt uncomfortable asking
The Who: 2/10. I’m not dealing with this “Who’s On First” bullshit
Radiohead: 0/10. Not a single person in this band has a radio for a head
Queens of the Stone Age: 0/10. This band should be called “five random dudes from the modern era” but FRDFTMA is a bit of a mouthful
Soundgarden: 2/10. Sound does not grow in the garden
Sonic Youth: 5/10. They’re not exactly youth anymore but the sonic part checks out
Talking heads: 8/10. There’s more to the band than just a bunch of disembodied heads but the heads do tend to talk
The Cranberries: 0/10. Decent music but I only added them so that the Beatles and Freddie Mercury weren’t the only fruits on this list
The Wiggles: 8/10. They do tend to wiggle a lot
Blue Man Group: 10/10. Yep!
Weezer: 5/10. They all look like they definitely have asthma
Limp Bizkit: 3/10. While the visual image of baked goods playing the guitar is hilarious, Fred durst is not a biscuit. Points added because he probably has erectile dysfunction
Stone Temple Pilots: 0/10. None of these people are accredited as being licensed to pilot anything, much less an entire stone temple. Stone temples don’t need pilots anyways
Wasted Youth: 8/10. I guess it really kinda depends on how you frame it but yeah, they probably wasted a lot of it
Them Crooked Vultures: 3/10. These are people and not birds but Dave Grohl’s posture is kinda bad and John Paul Jones is so old that his neck kinda looks like a vulture’s so I added some points
Audioslave: 0/10. Slavery is illegal
Traveling Wilburys: 4/10. Sure, they traveled a lot but not a single one of those lying bastards was named Wilbury
D12: 6/12. There were only 6 people in this band
NWA: 10/10. I’m a little too white to safely comment on this one but I’d say they nailed it
Jet: 1/10. A real jet would be way too loud
Goldfinger: 0/10. Not a single person in this band has a finger made out of gold
No Doubt: ?/10. I can’t really be too sure how Gwen Stefani felt but I think it’s probably a safe assumption that she had some doubts
The White Stripes: 3/10. I bet if you stripped them down naked and made them stand shoulder to shoulder and squinted really hard they’d probably look more like white stripes
Screaming trees: 3/10. They scream occasionally
Garbage: 2/10. I think they’re being a little harsh on themselves, their music isn’t THAT bad
Butthole Surfers: 5/10. Not even gonna touch this one
Megadeth: 3/10. To be fair, some of the former members are dead but only a little amount of death, not mega death
Dead Kennedys: 2/10. Last I checked Kennedy was still dead but neither he nor his clones are members of this band
Cake: 0/10. The cake is a lie
Cracker: 8/10. Most of them are
Tool: 7/10. I don’t know much about their music but they sure look like tools
Counting Crows: ?/10. Is this what emo kids do instead of counting sheep? Accuracy depends on whatever bird they happen to be counting at the moment
Dave Matthews Band: 10/10. It certainly is
Oasis: 1/10. Their music is the opposite of an oasis
Blur: 2/10. They are not that fast
Barenaked Ladies: 0/10. If I wanted to be this disappointed I’d reestablish a connection with my biological father instead
Meat Puppets: 10/10. Technically, aren’t we all?
Live: 8/10. Apparently they still do live shows but I deducted some points because I’ve only ever heard their music on Spotify
ABBA: 9/10. I’m still not giving any points to Guns N’ Roses but that’s mostly out of spite
5 Finger Death Punch: 8/10 I guess it probably depends on how hard you hit them but this seems to be the usual amount of fingers to punch somebody with
All American Rejects: 9/10. They’re all rejects from America so I don’t really see any issue with this
T. Rex: 0/10. Even if any of these people WAS a T. Rex I don’t think their arms would be long enough to play their instruments
Free: 0/10. Unless you steal their music, in which case it becomes a 10/10
The Strokes: 3/10. To my knowledge, none of them have had a stroke but I still added a few points because the name was probably accurate for other reasons
The Smashing Pumpkins ?/10. Another thing I have no way of verifying but this seems like a waste of perfectly good pumpkins
Therapy?: ?/10. The hell are they asking me for? I don’t know their medical history
Twenty One Pilots. 0/10. There’s only two of them and neither is a licensed pilot
Finger Eleven: 0/10. Leave the poor Stranger Things girl out of this
Fall Out Boy: 9/10. I conferred with an expert on this one who confirmed that they are in fact boys who had a falling out
Cream: 8/10. Considering this was the OG supergroup I’m sure a lot of people did in fact cream when their music came out
Edit: humans aren’t fucking monkeys. Stop saying we are
#r/196#r/196archive#196#/r/196#rule#meme#memes#shitpost#shitposting#music#rock#rock music#the Beatles#pink floyd#nirvana#foo fighters#the eagles#queen#led zeppelin#the rolling stones#metallica#red hot chili peppers#rhcp#guns n roses#backstreet boys#simon and garfunkel#the doors#Chicago#earth wind and fire#def leppard
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POV: You confess to them — Mouthwashing x Reader ; ✰
Captain Curly 🤤
Curly was in his cockpit doing captain shit. Your heart dropped when you saw him sitting there just.. just looking sexy..
You had the most FATTEST most BIGGEST crush on him. So this was the day you were gonna confess to him.
You tap on his shoulder sweating a bit, smelling like a sweaty ballsack.
“Captain, I was wondering if you wanted to-to date!! I-I have the biggest crush on you, king!!” You screamed out, as you t-trembled.
CURLY GASP IN DELIGHT BEFORE SHOVING HIS WHOLE FUCKING ARM DOWN YOUR THROAT CAUSING YOU TO FUCKING DIE
(He got too nervous :c )
Daisuke🌺
Daisuke was Breakdancing on the kitchen table. You admire him so much.. it.. it was like you couldn’t keep your eyes off him.
Today was the perfect day to confess your love for him! You walked up to him while he was still breakdancing, you were sweating so much that it looked like you pissed your pants.
“Daisuke, I like you let’s date-“ your words were cutoff as his fucking leg, HARD. hit your face causing you to break your nose and went into a coma.
(He didn’t notice you and kept breakdancing.)
Anya 💊
Anya was sleeping in her room dreaming about getting chased by a giant ass mouthwash bottle. She gulped, tossing and turning in her bed.
You thought today was the day to confess to her, you gulped before gently shaking her shoulder a bit.
You smelled like ass but like, it’s okay.
Anya gasped before she pinned you on the ground and started beating the living shit out of you.
“WHAT THE FUCK”
“GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU GIANT ASS MOUTHWASH”
Swansea 🪓
Swansea was on the couch just doing old people shit?? Anyways, you slowly walked up to him and gave him a love note. Your hands slightly shaking.
He looked confused, before taking the note.
“Uhm, what is this.” He asked.
“Just read it, saggy tits!” You screamed at him, blushing so much!!
He rolled his eyes before reading the love note.
Dear, Swansea.. I have the biggest most FATTEST crush on you.. I-I was wondering if you wanted to date.. I love the way your saggy tits jiggle when you walk, The way your GYAT sticks out whenever you bend down, The way you snapped Jimmys neck, the way you get drunk on mouthwash, the way you shit.. You’re so.. perfect.. <3 - Y/N.
His eyes widen before snapping your neck.
(Anya had to take care of you.)
Jimmy 🏳️🌈
Jimmy was in his room organizing his pony collection. You thought it was ADORABLE that he had a cute little pony collection.
You walked into his room before tapping his shoulder. “H-Hey Jim.. I like you so so sossosoososososos much! I was wondering if you wanted to.. hehe.. to date..”
Your voice slightly trembled before looking into his widen eyes.
“Erm, that would be cheating?..” He responded.
You got confused, tilting your head.
“What?..”
“That would be cheating.”
He then picked up his Polle BODYPILLOW. It looked fucking worn out, and it smelled like ass. THERE WAS A FUCKING HOLE TOO.
“I can’t cheat on Polle, Y/N.” He said coldly.
#mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#anya x reader#daisuke x reader#curly x reader#swansea x reader#jimmy x reader#fanfic#crush
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Random Mouthwashing Headcannons
hey guys it’s been a while since i did hc’s but i’m back and ready to post (somewhat) regularly, i’m also working on a digital version of my recent daisuke fanart! so stay tuned for that. These hc’s do NOT include nsfw.
Daisuke:
- NEVER wears matching socks, either he loses them or he just doesn’t care. Throws on the first two socks he sees and calls it a day.
-Also owns alot of fun socks, like the kind with patterns and weird sayings on them.
-Has only worked a few other jobs in his life but none of them really stuck (either because he made lots of mistakes or slacked off)
-Terrible around girls, talks about “beach babes” but if he was around them he would fumble so hard.
-Uses old spice ocean scented deodorant and body spray.
-Asian-Latino
Anya:
-Really bad sleep schedule, she has a hard time getting to sleep and staying asleep. Definitely tosses and turns a lot.
-Favorite flower is a Fuchsia (she also loves humming birds)
-SHES SO FUNNY, writes jokes on sticky notes and forgets about them. 😭
-Coffee is a girls best friend, (maybe i’m projecting) but i think she has a heavy caffeine addiction, cannot function if she doesn’t have a coffee or soda in the morning.
-BIG fan of the color purple. She seems like a purple kinda gal to me.
-LESBIAN
Swansea:
-Loves dad rock. Hinder, Nickelback, Incubus. His favorite is 3 doors down.
-Southern accent because he was born and raised in texas, moved to the midwest with his wife when they were 20-something’s.
-So. Many. Candles. He loves them, keeps one lit in his garage at home. (insanely unsafe)
-I don’t think he went to college, but he did live in the city (flirted with a lot of city girls back in the day.)
-Never left the states (this is a small one but i get that vibe from him)
Curly:
-GYM RAAAAT!!!! Works on his glutes way too often. Love’s chest days.
-Not a huge fan of the summer, prefers the winter because he loves snow sports. The winter olympics is his favorite event in the whole world.
-Popcorn is his favorite snack but specifically the ‘healthy’ kind. it’s disgusting but he loves it.
-Cannot pass up a bet for the life of him, In college he would do anything as long as you phrased it like “i bet you can’t-____”
-Looks good in a beard but won’t grow it out. LET IT GROW KING!!!!!
Jimmy:
-Very well groomed, very confident in how he looks. (he shouldn’t.)
-His favorite show is Bojack Horseman for all the wrong reasons. Type of guy to misinterpret every piece of media he consumes. (DONT SHOW HIM FIGHT CLUB!!!!!!)
-Curly and him went to college together. Still occasionally brings up embarrassing memories of Curly to knock him down a peg.
- idk i don’t wanna think about him anymore
#anya mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing#headcannons#mouthwashing headcanon
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I m sorry to bother you but…..do you think you could do KD x reader where they both have a shitty day and just need each other? Like they cuddle? Everybody needs comfort, even the greatest showman on inkwell isles!^^
You don't even know how much I needed to write this. These past few weeks have been hell for me, so it was so nice to finally be able to write something again, especially something comforting <3
There's some suggestive content in here still, so I advise everyone to be careful!
SUGGESTIVE CONTENT WARNING! 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI.
💋
King Dice x Reader "Bad Day Headcanons"
SONG RECOMMENDATION: “I’ll Never Smile Again” - Jimmy and Tommy Dorsey
King Dice x Reader “Bad Day” Headcanons (GAME)
If anyone were to ask King Dice what it’s like to be the right hand man of the Devil himself, why, he’d say it’s a dream. The best thing that’s ever happened to him. Well, maybe the second best. Marrying you will always come first.
He really does enjoy his job as the casino’s manager, and doesn’t mind the workload. To be surrounded by fawning fans and patrons, collecting their wallets, possessions, and damn souls from right under their noses? The job is certainly never boring. The poor fools who enter make sure of that.
King Dice always enjoys a good gamble. Whether it’s a friendly game of poker, craps, roulette, or even a bet on which racehorse would take the prize, the manager clings to the thrill of the risk like a drug.
But the thing about addiction is, you never realize how much you’re suffering until it’s much too late to do anything about it. More often than not, you tend to bite off much more than you can chew.
Dice occasionally finds himself in this position, having become in over his head. Sometimes, the die gets a small reality check of his own.
This reality check comes in many different forms. Not that he ever loses a bet, of course. The King never loses, and he intends to keep it that way, no matter how dirty his hands get. There’s a reason why the house always wins, and Dice is that reason.
Instead, his reality check comes in the form of angry patrons who have had one too much to drink, picking a fight with the manager. A demanding boss constantly looming over his shoulders, nitpicking Dice’s methods and making it incredibly difficult for him to do his damn job.
The crushing weight of pressure to keep up a perfect approachable appearance, luring the poor fools of Inkwell inside the Devil’s mitts like a lion tricking its prey.
Not to mention the heavy workload of papers to sign, contracts to file, tailoring appointments to keep his style consistent with whatever trends might be appearing, exhausting measures to keep his boss happy, stocking of supplies, the list could go on.
Normally, it’s manageable enough. Some of the tasks overlap, and Dice manages to find a nice, smooth routine to keep everything in order, especially with the help of his cards.
Typically, they will work behind the scenes while Dice manages the front, filing his papers for him, checking the drink stocks from behind the counter (the Tipsy Troop is of very little help at times), or even just forging Dice’s signature on a few of his contracts to lighten his load.
This way, all the King really has to deal with is a few tiffs with particular drunkards, looking pretty, and keeping his staff in line.
However… sometimes, the workload is just too much for Dice to handle, even with his cards and his staff scrambling to help the poor man keep a level head.
Sometimes, Dice is kept after his shift usually ends, signing contracts until he can barely see straight, fingers ready to fall off.
Sometimes, Dice gets scuffed up during a fight, causing a small crack in his head, or a few rips in his suit.
Sometimes, the Devil is too irate to effectively calm down, and Dice is on the receiving end of his boss’s wrath whether what caused the ruckus was his fault or not.
Sometimes… Dice just can’t take it.
There have been numerous occasions where you’ve watched him trudge inside your chambers, completely worn out, a sour expression on his face. Dice can’t even smile at you or offer any kind of greeting as he shucks off his shoes and jacket, frustratedly kicking the objects off to the side.
You hate seeing him like that. It’s not like him, at all. He deserves so much better than what he’s given, and you wish you could do something about his awful working conditions.
On the nights your husband returns to you looking beaten and weary, you do the one thing that you know he’ll never oppose. You guide him into laying on top of you, his aching head resting over your chest, listening to your soft, steady heartbeat.
You simply hold him in your arms and hum a relaxing tune, your fingers gently running over the crisp edges of his head. It relaxes him almost instantly.
Very few words are exchanged between the two of you. Dice is too tired and frustrated with everything to vent, and you don’t push him. You won’t even try to make small talk. Sometimes, there’s just no point in speech.
No… sometimes, things are meant to be silent. And comforting Dice after a horrible day at work is usually one of those times.
In the early hours of morning, you may occasionally wake up and find Dice staring up at the ceiling, unable to sleep with too much on his mind. It is here when he finally opens up to you, spilling the details of why he entered your chambers in such a cranky mood.
You say nothing, just letting him speak, not even flinching when he occasionally raises his voice, gesturing irritatedly with his hands. You barely even bat an eye when he lets out a frustrated huff, grumbling under his breath about how different he wishes his life turned out, falling onto his back with a defeated sigh.
What does get your heart caught in your throat, is when his hand finds yours from under the covers. When he gives you a gentle squeeze, shifting close to you and rubbing his thumb over the smooth, shiny gold of your wedding ring.
“You’re the only good thing that’s come out of this mess, doll.”
Before you can even respond, Dice is asleep, his hand still squeezing your own like a lifeline.
Well, that certainly gets your heart to flutter.
You can absolutely relate to his struggles, as you have had many, many bad days of your own. More than you can count. Fortunately, it’s usually nothing you can’t deal with yourself.
You can handle a hard day with your own job. You can handle coming home to the casino’s chaotic ambiance after a hard day at work, with a couple drinks and a quick smoke for good measure. You can handle the long wait for your husband to return from his shifts and into your quarters. The wait is a hundred times worth it for that sweet, sensual embrace he gives you (and whatever follows afterwards).
What gets you slightly miffed is the treatment from the folks around you who are cautious, curious, and just damn nosy over your relationship with King Dice. Repeated. Near constant.
If you need to answer one more goddamn question about Dice’s ability as the Devil’s right hand man to love, one more inquiry over whether or not the man has you in some sort of trance, one more jealous complaint from the filthy drunkards who can’t learn to keep to themselves, your head just might fall off its shoulders.
It’s not that you’re not used to the comments and questions, it’s not that you can’t handle the occasional jab from another being. It’s definitely not that you’re protective of your husband, when he can certainly protect himself and you as soon as he feels the need to. It just… it gets so god damn annoying after a while.
And some days, you just can’t.
The pressure of your job, worrying over your lover and his duties, dealing with the obsessive freaks? It’s certainly difficult not to crack.
What ends up tipping you over the edge is any extra conflict life decides to throw at you on that particular day. Your boss gives you a hard time over something unwarranted. Someone bumped into you and spilled a drink all over you, so you have to work in soiled clothing.
You’ll never admit it to yourself (or anyone else), but you’re a ticking time bomb on the daily, waiting for one final push into detonation. And when that push comes, well, you’re nearly inconsolable.
You barely make it through the rest of your day without killing someone. As soon as your shift ends, you head back home, attempting to take the side door to avoid the casino’s loud, unbearable ambiance.
The door is locked. God fucking dammit.
You let out a frustrated shout, banging your fist against the golden door frame before stepping away. You bite the inside of your cheek to distract yourself from the growing pain in your hand, and the fact that you now have to make your way through the suffocating atmosphere just to get to your room.
Holding your breath, you quickly throw open the double doors, effectively silencing the whole room with the sheer amount of force you use as each door slams against the walls with a bit of recoil.
Ignoring the stares and slight whispers of the folks who recognize who you are, you make your way through the maze of tables and machines, passing by the Blackjack table where your husband sat at the head, his deck of cards slipping from his hands and falling into a heap on the table.
He stares at you in surprise, eyes desperate to reach yours, feeling crestfallen when you never meet his gaze.
Watching you effectively slip past the crowd and head into the private halls, Dice makes a mental note to grab a bottle of wine for you on the way back to his chambers. He notices the clusters of people continuing to stare at the door and whispering in suspicion, and quickly becomes angry over their inquiries.
Gathering up his deck of cards with one swoop of the hand, he brings his other fist down on the table to grab everyone’s attention, glaring menacingly at the wide eyes of his patrons.
“Well, get back to it, will ya?! Don’t you fellas know it’s rude to stare at someone and start talkin’ smack when they’re no longer present? Forget what you saw and move on!”
The powerful bellow of his voice combined with his threatening gaze was enough to jumpstart the casino into action once again, the games and chatter continuing like nothing ever even happened.
With an aggravated huff, he turns back to his own table and silently deals the deck to his slightly shaky players, ignoring their hesitant movements and fearful eyes on him. As long as they aren’t focused on you anymore, he doesn’t give a damn.
When the day finally ends, Dice makes a beeline towards his room, a bottle of wine and two glasses in hand. For once, he’s silent as he opens the door and steps inside, quietly stepping over to your curled up form on the bed.
A gentle hand rubs over your shoulder, making you flinch in surprise before you slowly relax into your husband’s touch, your eyes slipping shut as you do your best to collect yourself.
Dice notices you trying to calm down and shakes his head, setting the wine and glasses down on your nightstand and taking your hands.
“It’s alright to be angry and upset, sweetness. Don’t try and bottle it up for my sake. If you need to yell or cry, go ahead. I’ll spare your dignity.”
That’s all you need to hear. Dice silently nods along in understanding as you tear into the horrible day you had, letting you yell out your frustrations, his hand gently running along your inner thigh in an attempt to comfort you.
If you start to shed any tears in the middle of your rant, your lover offers you his handkerchief, continuing to listen to you as he pours you a glass of liquid happiness.
The rest of the night is filled with tears, alcohol, and eventual silence as you both finish off the bottle, settling down for bed. You’re more than eager to sleep off the struggles, in hopes that tomorrow will bring you fortune.
You both are there for each other when you need it, and that’s something you’ll always cherish about your husband. How someone as intimidating and evil as him could be so sweet and caring with you, you’ll never understand. But you are grateful for it.
Dice is just as grateful for you, for dealing with his messes. For putting up with his work life, for loyally waiting for him every night, no matter how late it gets. For looking past his ‘rough and tough’ persona, and learning to love his broken, messy interior.
Your love for each other is what gets you both through even the hardest of days.
That includes, when both of you aren’t exactly having the best time. It’s rare for you to have an off day at the same time, but in the unfortunate case that something like this happens, well… you lean on each other more than ever.
Both metaphorically and physically.
As usual, you return home first, making your way through the casino’s main floor and biting your lip to keep from shouting at the drunkards who bump into you, whoop and holler in your ear, or simply stare at you in disgusting infatuation.
Except this time, Dice is too distracted with his own hardships that he doesn’t even notice you come in. This time, it’s his eyes that fail to meet yours as you pass by, creating a slight twinge in your heartstrings.
It seems today is just shitty all around, you suppose.
Stopping by Dice’s office, you grab a couple books from one of his many bookshelves, and head back to your quarters. Maybe some light reading will help you get your mind out of reality for a while.
Dice’s escape from reality… isn’t quite as healthy.
With a cigar in his mouth and a glass of scotch in his hand, he finally makes his way to the room with heavy footsteps, just wanting to see you. To hold you. To lament to you.
He knows in his heart that all you want is the same. It’s what you both need right now. You just need to be near each other. To hold each other. To kiss each other. To forget the stress of the day, and just focus on what’s most important.
Your love for one another.
The quiet creak of the door opening followed by the light of the hall flooding the room catches your attention, your head lifting from your book and finally meeting Dice’s eye as he steps inside, taking a drink from his whiskey glass and setting it on his bedside table.
You’re up in a moment, the book forgotten about as you make your way over to him, helping him remove his jacket, carefully draping it over a hook and hanging it neatly. When Dice kicks off his shoes, you move them underneath his hanging tailcoat for him.
The only sounds in the room are the rustling of fabrics being taken off, the soft pads of footsteps trailing to the bathroom, the running water from the sink’s faucet, and the aching ringing in your ears.
Dice washes the makeup from his face and steps back into the bedroom, sitting on the edge of the bed with you, clad only in his boxers. His movements are tender and careful as he cups your face with his hands, his fingers slowly covering your ears, helping to finally rid you of the god-awful sounds plaguing your brain and causing a headache.
Your eyes flutter closed as you rest your pounding forehead against his bare chest, taking in that addicting scent of smoke and musk.
For the first time in a while, Dice chuckles slightly, leaning down and pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. While you rest against him, he helps you rid yourself of your top and bottoms, leaving you in your undergarments. Shivering slightly, you shift closer to him for warmth, and Dice responds by pulling you into his lap all together.
He peppers you with all the kisses you’d ever need, holding your face in his hands as he makes his way over your cheeks, forehead, nose, and finally, your lips.
Oh, hell, his lips are magical. They’re so soft against your own, and the taste of alcohol and cigar smoke is always welcomed. It’s incredible. Your favorite way to take your whiskey, if you were honest with yourself.
Your arms find your way around his neck area, and his around your waist. Both of you are itching just to get a taste of each other, your tongues meeting and mingling with one another. You both are exhausted and frustrated with your lives, but it’s the kisses you share that make the day worth going through.
Dice scoots back into bed with you in his lap, laying down on his back, letting you sprawl on top of him. Skin against skin. Lips against lips. Hands interlocked. Neither of you want to be anywhere else.
After a while, you both are content with just relaxing in each other’s embrace, unwilling to move. You’re warm. Comfortable. Almost happy. Almost.
It’s not enough to completely fix the horribleness of your days, but it’s damn near close. It’s enough to convince you both that the hard days are worth it. It’s enough to bring small, peaceful smiles on your faces, providing comfort for each other when it’s so desperately needed.
“Darlin’?”
Your husband finally speaks, bringing you out of your thoughts. You turn your head to look up at him, your eyes locking in with his bright green ones.
“Are you alright?” He asks, hesitantly, already knowing the answer. You understand what he’s really asking– he wants to know if you’re willing to talk about it, or if you just need time in silence.
You sigh softly to yourself, contemplating your reply before you flash him a soft smile, gently rubbing your hand over his chest.
“I’m okay, my love. It was just a rough day today.”
Dice understands your reply and nods, pressing a loving kiss to your forehead as he shifts on his side, letting you shift with him so you both are in a spooning position, with your partner hugging you from behind.
“Alright.”
Silence falls over the both of you, and you are left with your thoughts, occasionally shifting closer together for comfort when you remind yourselves of what you’ve gone through that day. If Dice’s leg finds its way over yours, you don’t mind at all. If you let out the occasional sniffle as your emotions threaten to take over, Dice pretends he doesn’t hear.
If your shoulders begin to heave slightly as you silently cry to yourself, Dice’s soothing hand makes its way towards your back, rubbing reassuringly. If Dice squeezes you closer in an effort to quell his own shakiness, you rest your back against him, nestling your head under the bottom edge of his cubed head.
After a while, you turn around to face him, wanting to bury yourself into his arms. The smile that had temporarily graced your lips is gone, replaced with a dispirited frown.
Dice looks down at you in concern, gently caressing your cheek, his thumb wiping away the occasional tear that fell down your cheek.
“You’re not alright, are you, sugar?”
A shaky sigh leaves your lips as you shut your eyes, a couple extra tears lining your eyes making their way down your cheeks. Dice takes care of those as well, his fingers gently massaging your face in comfort.
“No, I’m not.”
Not that you needed to tell him that. He knows. He always knows. And he understands, you know that. Because he’s not alright, either. Neither of you are.
You’re both in pain. Exhausted. Frustrated. Angry. You aren’t even in the mood to be intimate tonight, neither of you have the energy.
Even so, you find yourself pressing closer against him, relishing in the feeling of your skin contacting his. Falling intoxicated to the addicting scent of smoke and citrus that at this point may be Dice’s natural musk.
Sometimes, just cuddling with each other without any clothes on is just what you need. It’s physical. Intimate enough. Comforting. Relaxing, even. It’s nice, when you want the blissful feeling that sex leaves you, but when neither of you have the strength to move.
The slow, slightly shaky rise and fall of Dice’s chest keeps you grounded in reality, and simultaneously, your erratic heartbeat fluttering against his own keeps your lover’s own emotions in check. It’s a silent reminder that you’re okay. You’re safe. You’re not going anywhere.
If there’s one thing that you both can count on, it’s that you’re secure. Dice would never let anything happen to you, and you would always be there to pick up the shards and piece his life back together.
You both lock eyes with each other, silently proclaiming your love for one another, and kiss once more. Your breathing slows as you relax once more, just focusing on the comforting tastes, scents, and soft groans coming from the King.
Dice pulls you closer to him, holding you tightly as he runs a gentle hand through your hair. The feeling is soothing to him; your hair is so soft. He doesn’t want to be anywhere else. Luckily for him, neither do you.
Eventually, you both slip off to sleep, finding contentment from being wrapped in each other’s arms, exchanging gentle snores with one another as you finally get some rest.
At 6:00 am sharp, Dice’s alarm goes off, the man groaning in irritation as his hand lazily swats at the damned thing before yanking out the plug. With a yawn, you sit up and stretch, sighing to yourself as you mentally prepare yourself for what you hope to be a better day at work.
Before you can get far, however, Dice’s hand grabs your wrist, pulling you back into his warm, relaxing embrace.
“Dice, we need to-”
“Five more minutes, doll. Please.”
You sigh, shaking your head as you squirm slightly, not wanting to be late for your job.
“Dice, I can’t. We can’t. Your boss would use your head as game dice for the craps table if he knew you had–”
“To hell with the boss.” Dice grumbles crankily, insistently pulling you closer. “My boss, and your own, can wait five minutes.”
Well, you suppose he does have a point. Besides, he’s so comfortable, it’d be a waste to get up now, when you both still have a little time. So, you reluctantly give in, settling back down and shutting your eyes again. Surely, the day can wait a little longer.
And when you both wake up a half hour later, scrambling to get up and make yourselves presentable, as much as you want to say otherwise you can’t help but think to yourself…
It’s worth it.
King Dice x Reader “Bad Day” Headcanons (SHOW)
Many believe that becoming a beloved star in showbiz has to be a dream come true.
Let’s face it, the showmen get everything they could ever ask for. Doting fans who would bend over backwards just for a damn signature, the ability to pick up anyone they want for a partner, all the money in the world, and an influencing presence on some of the highest officials in town.
Being a star should be the best thing that could ever happen to a man. And if you were to ask King Dice how he views his job, he’d certainly tell you how splendid he has it.
After all, running a game show where he can sing, dance, and talk all he wants, with an enormous crowd screaming his name before he even enters the stage? Why, it’s magical.
The King loves his job, dearly. He doesn’t see himself doing anything else. He’s even found himself enjoying the thought of what happens to the foolish fellows who stumble upon his spotlight, happily playing his game, and falsely believing they’ve won. Sure, they may have won on paper, but here's the catch: King Dice never loses.
There’s something so satisfying about the idea of those pests who are so desperate to touch him getting what’s coming to them. It’s a nice little bonus to the job, knowing that those he severely disliked would be taken care of.
However… sometimes, King Dice gets the occasional contestant who isn’t so horrible. A contestant who’s surprisingly respectful of his boundaries, plays the game perfectly, and doesn’t give him any trouble whatsoever.
Dice would be lying if he didn’t feel a little twinge of guilt as he watches the poor thing happily wave to the crowd before waltzing into the Mystery Prize Room, expecting a wonderful bout of riches and earthly pleasure. The showman closes the door quickly, signing off before leaving the stage in a slight rush, not wanting to think of it any longer.
King Dice is selfish. Egotistical. Arrogant. Self-absorbed. The perfect fit for the Devil’s ‘Number One.’ He couldn’t care less about what happens to others; it’s none of his concern.
But yet… that unfamiliar sting of regret still finds its way to Dice’s cold, dead heart.
It’s uncomfortable. Awkward. Foreign. It shouldn’t be there.
It sours his mood. He curses that contestant for being so unlucky. He curses his boss for putting him in this position, knowing fully well that for the sake of his job, he’s lost the trust of one of the good ones. But most of all, he curses himself, for not giving enough warning.
Being a splendid actor, Dice is able to finish the rest of the night without a hitch, but there are other things on his mind. His head is no longer in the game.
And the occasional guilty night is only one hardship Dice puts up with as a star working for the Devil. The list could go on for miles.
Unpleasant conversations with his boss when one of his contestants came close to losing. The headaches from the constant flashing cameras fighting each other for a good angle of him. The carpal tunnel from signing every damn scrap of paper his fans shove in his face. The numbness in his cheeks from smiling all day long.
That’s not even half of it.
The truth is, being a star isn’t all it's cracked up to be. It’s hard work. Exhausting rehearsals. Pounds of makeup. Putting up a charismatic persona under layers of clothing, under hot lights. For hours. A lot of sacrifice is put into making sure everything is perfect, and some days, Dice wonders whether or not it’s worth it.
You’ve spent many nights as Dice’s support system, guiding him out of his dressing room and into the waiting limo from the back way, to avoid the crowds. Letting him rest his legs in your lap as the limo takes you home, and massaging his aching feet as he sips tiredly at his champagne. Helping him up to your chambers, removing his jacket for him and hanging it up neatly by the door to be used for the next day.
Unbuttoning his vest and undershirt, tossing the clothes into the hamper for his cards to wash, and gently massaging his bare chest. Allowing him to melt into your touch with a gentle moan as you slip his slacks off for him, setting them off to the side as you coax your lover to lay down.
Wiping off his makeup for him as he complains to you about the exhaustion he feels, and the mess he had to deal with that day. Letting him rant out his frustrations at how disgusting his fans can be, and how he sometimes wishes he hired a few bodyguards to keep the pests away. Consoling him with a soft, soothing voice, validating his struggles and perhaps even appealing to his ego, letting him know just how patient and strong he is for dealing with such nastiness all day.
Dice is grateful for your help, every time. And he’s sure to let you know that as you work your magic.
“You’re the only one who could ever bring me true joy, doll. I adore you.”
You smile and shake your head, kissing his cheek as you peel off your own clothes, tossing them off to the side and laying down with him, allowing him to rest his pounding head over your chest and relishing in the contact.
“And I you, my King. Please, get some sleep. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.”
He obeys, but only after you start humming to him. Your voice puts him right out, and he finally finds the relaxation he’s been looking for.
Your job complete, you allow yourself to snuggle close with him, watching over him and making sure he’s safe and secure. Eventually, your eyes slip shut, and you both rest together, allowing the past to wither away in preparation for the next day.
You understand where your husband is coming from, sometimes. Every job has its faults and struggles, including the job of singing and putting on a show for others’ enjoyment. Including your own job, which leaves you with many, many days where you wonder if it’s even worth the effort.
After all, Dice makes more than enough money to keep you both well off for the rest of your lives. You don’t necessarily need to keep your job, but it’s something to do during the day while your lover is at the studio. Something to keep you busy. Something you’ve earned for yourself. An accomplishment. It’s hard to give up.
Even though sometimes, you heavily consider quitting in favor of keeping your husband company. It’d be nice to let go of all the hardships of your job for good, and bask in Dice’s presence all day instead.
The worst of it all is when you work overtime, and you miss Dice’s show entirely. You sometimes get so occupied you can’t even tune in on the radio. It makes you unbelievably aggravated. Not only that, but you can’t even make it to go home with him at times, having to catch a cab back to your quarters.
Even so, Dice waits for you. Greets you as soon as you trudge through the door, taking care of your bags, your coat, and your shoes. Drawing a bath for you, and helping you undress. Undressing himself, and joining you in the tub. He washes the grime off of your body for you, singing a soft, comforting melody as you rest your head on his chest, your sore voice trying to match his rhythm.
Soon enough, you both are softly singing together in harmony as Dice massages the tension out of your shoulders and back, effectively distracting you from your heavy responsibilities.
Once you’re clean and Dice is satisfied with his work, he pulls up the plug and drains the tub, carrying you out and drying you off. He secures his fluffiest robe around you, tying the knot with a pretty little bow before drying himself, shucking on another robe for himself, and guiding you out into the bedroom.
A slow jazzy song is chosen from his record books, and the gramophone plays the tune gently, prompting a slow dance between you and your husband. His hands guide you into the proper positions, and soon he’s swaying along to the song with you, singing to you and sneaking in a few kisses until a smile finally graces your lips.
You admire his ability to bring you joy, even when you don’t feel like smiling at all. It’s so unbelievably sweet of him to treat you so kindly, especially when his job is just as difficult.
Once you’re worn out and you’ve forgotten all about the struggles you faced in the day, Dice will remove your robe and his own, carrying you off to bed to turn in for the night.
He holds you. Tightly. His lips grace your face and neck, planting several kisses over your skin along with the occasional love bite. He understands you may be too tired to be intimate, but he figures he can at least make a mark or two to let others know you’re taken.
His teeth and mouth feel exquisite against you, and the gentle nipping and biting make you chuckle occasionally. He tickles, especially when his mustache grazes over your skin just slightly.
Dice longs for your laughter. It’s all he ever wants to hear from you. He hates seeing you upset, and if he can help it, he’ll chase all of the horrible feelings away, leaving you a relaxed, giggling mess in his arms.
“Dice…” You manage to mutter between your laughter.
“What is it, angel-eyes?”
“Thank you for this. I appreciate it. You never fail to take the pain away when I need you the most. I love you, so so much.”
Dice simply smiles at your words, bringing the duvet over you and covering you up so only your head is sticking out. With a kiss to your lips and a caress of your cheek, he murmurs into your mouth some of the sweetest things you’ve ever heard him say.
“Anything to see your smile again, my dear. It breaks my heart to see you so upset. Please, lean on me when you feel like you’ve lost your smile. I’ll always be willing to help you find it.”
He seals the promise with another sensual kiss to your lips, bringing you into his chest as your tongues explore each other’s mouths. You’ll never understand how he sweeps you off your feet with something as simple as a kiss, but you won’t complain. You love it.
He’s yours. And you’re his. No one else will ever have the privilege of his gentleness, or your loyalty. No one else deserves those privileges. They can rot in hell, for all you care.
You eventually find yourself nodding off in his arms. With a fond chuckle, Dice pulls his mouth away from you and lets your head drop onto his shoulder. Your ear is filled with your husband’s sensual whispers of praise, successfully lulling you to sleep.
Wanting to keep you relaxed even in the early morning hours, Dice wakes up before his alarm and shuts it off before it even has the chance to ring. Figuring he’s allowed to be a little late just this once, he decides to stay with you an extra hour, humming quietly in your ear and massaging your shoulders.
When you finally wake to get ready for work, you find a small box of chocolates and a cup of your favorite morning drink along with a single purple rose resting on your nightstand.
That cheesy bastard, you love him to pieces.
Taking a sip of your drink and indulging yourself in a few of the chocolates, you decide that you can finally move forward, and strive to have a better day. With Dice’s sweet gesture, you’re already off to a pretty good start.
Through your hard days and his own, you and Dice are always there to pick each other back up when you need it. You’re each other’s rocks. Best friends. Spouses. You wouldn’t want to share this type of bond with anyone else. When one of you is down and broken, the other will always be there to pick up the pieces.
However, there is the rare occasion when both of you are down. When both of you are tired, struggling, and ready to quit. Those days hit especially hard.
You can already tell it’s one of those days when you trudge home late after work, and find that Dice isn’t even home. He must’ve gotten caught with the crowd, or was dragged off to some damn party that he really didn’t want to go to. Dice hated any parties that involved other celebrities. Hoity-toity bastards. They make him sick to his stomach.
Even though a huge part of you wants nothing more than to curl up and sleep, you know that you won’t be successful until your husband comes home. You can’t sleep as well when you’re alone, especially when you’re emotionally struggling. You need him.
And when Dice finally steps into your quarters, barely able to stand on his own as he lets his tailcoat fall to the ground, you can tell that he needs you just as much.
Exhausted, you make your way over to him and just wrap your arms around him, burying your face into his chest. After a few moments of processing, you feel Dice’s arms tightly wrap around you as well, pulling you against him as his shoulders sag slightly. Jeez, he’s so weak and tired, it makes your heart break for him.
“Shitty day?” You ask, your voice muffled from your face being snugly buried into his chest.
You hear a dejected sigh from above you as Dice rests his head on top of yours, nodding slowly.
“Shitty day. You?”
“Mhm.” You mutter back, hugging yourself closer to him for safety and relief.
Dice coos sadly in response, kicking off his shoes and sliding them in a heap by the door. You yelp a little in surprise as he lifts you up, carrying you over to bed and sitting down on the edge with you.
You watch as he runs a defeated hand over his face, shaking his head in resignation. He looks worn and ragged, like he had been run through a road roller. Dice certainly feels that way, at least.
He looks down at you with an unreadable expression, cupping your face and examining your eyes. Your beautiful, glossy eyes that are incredibly easy to get lost in. They’re truly a wonder, in Dice’s head. You yourself, are a wonder. A joy. A prize.
He wishes you didn’t feel so low today.
“I’m so sorry, my sweet. But I don’t believe I have the energy to help you find your smile tonight.”
That sentence is enough to shatter your heart, but not in the way you’d think. You’re not upset that he can’t provide the comfort he thinks you need. You’re not upset that he can’t make love to you, or run you a bath, or dance with you until your feet hurt.
You’re upset that he’s been run down to his last thread tonight. You’re upset that he feels guilty for being unable to help you in the way he would like. You’re upset that he’s had such a horrible day, when he should’ve been enjoying himself.
In response to his apology, you lean forward and press your lips to his, gently nipping at his bottom lip and coaxing a small groan from his throat.
Helping him undress completely, you mumble in his mouth in a voice that’s barely audible:
“Dice, don’t think that you need to pamper me to help me relax. Don’t think that you need to sweep me off my feet and carry me everywhere to make you happy. Don’t think that you need to do all of these sweet little gestures to bring me comfort.”
You run your hands up and down his sides, memorizing the way his smooth ivory skin feels against your fingers.
“All I need tonight is you. And you’re here now. That’s all I could ever want. I just want you.”
Dice is at a loss for words, opening his mouth to say something, but nothing coming out. After a minute, he sighs hopelessly, shaking his head and just holding you in his arms, searching for solace in your loving warmth.
You both sit together, naked and weary, just embracing each other. Loving each other. Not daring to move, in fear of stumbling or breaking the quiet atmosphere. It’s… surprisingly wholesome.
Who knew that all you both would ever need when you’re down is a hug? That was all it took to make you at least a little content with where your life is? You suppose you shouldn’t be surprised, after all any type of contact with Dice is enough to bring you peace.
You contemplate in his arms for a moment, remembering that new blues song that was playing on the radio over your workplace a few days ago. How did it go again?
Oh, yes. You remember.
“I’ll never smile again…” you start, your voice hesitant, wondering if you had heard the lyrics right. “Until I…”
Recognizing what you were trying to sing, Dice finds the corners of his lips turning up in a soft smile. He kisses your forehead, hugging you close and slowly swaying back and forth with you from where you were both seated on the bed.
“Until I smile at you…” he finishes your open sentence, gently rubbing your back as his mind recalls the melody himself.
“I’ll never laugh again… what good would it do?”
You close your eyes, peacefully swaying along with him as you both slowly make your way through the song, taking in the quiet, soothing notes of the melody.
“I’ll never love again, I’m so in love with you…”
As you harmonize with your husband, you eventually feel a small, blissful smile finally reach your face. You both gaze into each other’s eyes, smiling tiredly with one another as you finally conclude with the last line of that song you both had just gotten familiar with.
“Until I smile at you.”
Silence greets your ears once again, but this time, there’s a feeling of satisfaction in the air, rather than misery. And what’s even better is, you both are smiling with one another.
You chuckle quietly, your hand tracing up and down Dice’s bicep as you gently kiss and bite at his collar bone.
“You know, you had apologized earlier for not having any energy to help me find my smile. But I don’t think you realize that all I need to smile again is you, Dice.”
Dice stares down at you in slight awe, slowly processing your words and taking them to heart. You feel yourself get slightly squeezed against him as he lets out a quiet, teary chuckle that brings out a couple tears of your own that you didn’t realize you were holding back.
“I… I guess I never thought of that, babydoll.”
He wipes away your tears as he blinks back his own, lowering his head down and pressing tiny kisses to the top of your head, little bursts of love and warmth exploding from your chest.
You ache for him. He puts so much unnecessary pressure on himself, sometimes it’s hard to watch. You wish he’d give himself a break. He deserves one more than ever.
“Tomorrow’s your day off, right? It’s Saturday, so I have off as well. Maybe we could dedicate it as a recovery day.” You offer quietly, rubbing in between his shoulder blades to help him calm himself.
With a gentle sniffle and a moment of thought, Dice smiles sadly once again, nodding thoughtfully and taking your hand.
“I’d love that more than anything, sweet one. We’ll spend the whole day together, just the two of us.”
Just the two of you. No one else. Not a single coworker to deal with, or a boss screaming in your ear. Not one nasty admirer clinging to Dice’s leg, begging for one picture. Just you, Dice, and the peaceful quiet that home brings the both of you. Yes… that does sound perfect.
“It’s a date then.”
Content with your plans of a better tomorrow, Dice crawls back into bed and lays down with you, curling up under the covers with you snuggled perfectly in his arms. Once you both settle down, you sigh quietly together, your heads slowly resting against each other.
Your hands connect with each other, the soft metal of your wedding rings clinking together as your fingers interlock. The clear diamonds sparkle and glisten as the pale moonlight peaks in from the window, hitting the stones at just the right angle.
Dice grins warmly in amusement, his thumb rubbing over the rings in curiosity before he squeezes your hand reassuringly, bringing you closer.
“Now that I think about it… I wouldn’t have my life any other way. I think I’ve done well for myself.”
You laugh softly, your nose gently brushing against the pip on his face as you nod in response, agreeing with his statement.
“I wouldn’t either, sweetheart. You’re worth all the bad days in the world.”
You relax in each other’s arms, peacefully satisfied with where you both are at. As you start to nod off, you hear Dice begin to quietly hum the tune you were both singing together earlier in an attempt to lull you off to sleep. It works, rather quickly. You’re passed out by the time he reaches the fifth or sixth line.
For a moment, Dice watches you resting against him, enjoying the feeling of your chest slowly rising and falling against his own, your heart beats slowly coming together and finding a steady rhythm.
He’s right; he wouldn’t have it any other way. This is perfect. All he needs.
You’re all I need, the showman thinks to himself as his heavy eyelids finally close, and within mere seconds, he’s fast asleep, holding you securely in his embrace.
You both sleep well into the next day, taking the time to recuperate and take care of the exhaustion you were dealing with. By the time you finally rise, you keep the promise you had made to each other, spending the day making each other laugh, sing, and dance together.
Your love for each other really is worth all the bad days in the world.
#cuphead#cuphead dont deal with the devil#the cuphead show#king dice#king dice cuphead#king dice fanfic#king dice x reader#suggestive
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BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION
A/N: Hi everyone sooo today is my birthday and I know I have a tons of request I should be working on but I want to celebrate this day with you guys, so I made this list with prompts of I love you a few are with Taylor swift songs and others are with actions, so I hope you have a great day and send me an asked if you want a request, and before I go I want to thank you for all your love and support you gave to me!!
I LOVE YOU WITH TAYLOR SWIFT SONGS
1. I like shiny things but I marry you in paper rings.
2. And I can’t let you go, your heart print’s on my soul.
3. For you I would fall from grace just to touch your face.
4. But I stay when it’s hard or it’s wrong or we’re making mistakes.
5. All these peoples thinks love’s for show, but I would die in secret.
6. No more keepin’ score now, I just want to keep you warm.
7. And at every table, I’ll save you a seat.
8. I’m a fire and I’ll keep your brittle heart warm if your cascade ocean wave blue come.
9. You’re my best friend.
10. I remember how we felt sitting by the water and every time I look at you, it’s like the first time.
11. You can hear it in the silence. You can feel it on my way home. You can see it with the lights out.
12. And I know I make the same mistakes every time, bridges burn, I never learn, at least I did one thing right.
13. I want to wear his initial on a chain round my neck… not because he owns me because he knows me.
14. Squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi.
15. Can I go where you go? Can I we always be these close?
16. With your boots beneath my bed… forever is the sweetest con
17. And all at once you are the one I have been waiting for, king of my heart, body and soul.
18. I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends, I’d never walk Cornelia street again.
19. One single thread of gold tied me to you.
20. I once believed love would be burning red, but it’s golden
21. Please don’t ever become a stranger who’s laugh I could recognize anywhere.
22. Have I know you twenty second or twenty years.
23. All I know is a new found grace. All my days I’ll know your face.
24. Long live the walls we crashed through, I had the time of my life with you.
25. My house of stone, my ivy grows and now I’m covered in you.
26. Don’t want no other shade of blue but you.
27. Say my name and everything just stop.
28. I’d like to hangout with you for my whole life.
29. Baby all at once is enough.
30. Even in my worst times, you could se the best in me.
31. I had the best day with you today.
32. My waves meet your shore, ever and evermore.
33. I don’t wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you.
34. All that ends well to end up with you.
Other ways to say I love you.
35. Put your seatbelt on.
36. I save you a piece.
37. I got you something.
38. I told my family about you.
39. Text me when you land.
40. Do you want the last piece of pizza.
41. I make you coffee.
42. Have you eaten today?
43. To the moon and back.
44. This song reminds me of you.
45. Tell me more.
46. Here, take my jacket.
47. I’ll take you.
48. I got you a key of my house.
49. I made a playlist.
50. I like you.
Characters I write about: Poe dameron, Richard Alonzo Muñoz, duke Leto, Nathan Bateman, Santiago Garcia, Marc Spector, Steven grant, Jake Lockley, Jonathan Levy, William Tell, Llewyn Davis, Taron Egerton, jimmy Keene, Eggsy Unwin, Jake “hangman” Seresin
#poe dameron x reader#richard alonso muñoz x reader#leto atreides x reader#nathan bateman x reader#santiago pope garcia x reader#santiago garcia x reader#steven grant x reader#marc spector x reader#llewyn davis x reader#taron egerton x reader#eggsy unwin x reader#jimmy keene x reader#jake hangman seresin x reader#jake seresin x reader
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hay I'm back and I've got a daily planet/ introduction ask: one day while they're both in metropolis (10 year old) Jon and (young justice TV series season 1) Conner, by chance, are walk to the daily planet and walk in and ,by chance, see Clark and Lois and say hi. Lois and Clark are surprised but also say hi too. By chance, Perry sees the family and doesn't know about Conner and barely knows about Jon. And so does Jimmy.
Perry:
1: for the purpose of deceiving Perry. Would Clark and Lois say Conner is their recently adopted son?
2: buying it. Does Perry point out that even though Conner is adopted he has a lot of Clark's features in his face and even says that Conner looks like Clark. If so what would you say specifically?
3: would Conner act in a way that Perry point that Conner has some of Clark's mannerisms? And if so what does Conner do?
4: does jon say hi to Perry and Perry say hi back?
5: if they ask do Conner and Jon ask Perry if they help Clark and Lois on their next assignment?
6: after meeting Perry what are Conner and Jon's opinion of him?
Jimmy:
1: this comes from The Young Justice TV series comics. When Jimmy see the family he recognizes Conner dose Jimmy says hay and dose Conner get worried because he remembers Jimmy?
2: to try and fool Jimmy do Clark and Lois tell him that Conner is there recently adopted son?
3: dose Clark make up some lie about how after they met he decided to adopt Conner and if so what does Clark say to Jimmy specifically?
4: does Jimmy point out that ,even though he's adopted, Conner has a lot of Clark's features and some of his mannerisms?
5: dose Jon embrace Jimmy due to the fact that he's basically another family member to him and dose Jimmy return the sentiment?
6: realizing they're going out on an assignment and finding out that the boys are going with them dose Jimmy go with the family to know more about Conner and spend time with Jon?
Perry:
1. I bet they will and they sound convincing
2. He will, saying something akin to “Well, the hair’s as coal black and the eyes certainly look like that special “can’t lie to me at all” blue hue you got, Kent”
3. He would. Mainly Clark’s attentive stares when trying to pay attention, keeping his fingers close together when when sitting upright and when not paying darting his eyes around for anything to pop up any second
4. Yes in both accounts
5. They probably would though Jon would be the first to pop the question, Conner joining in afterwards
6. They like the guy even though he can be a bit rough around the edges and a fast talker. Reminds the two a lot of that Jameson guy from those Spidey movies Jon likes
Jimmy:
1. Probably it might start off like that
2. They probably would if only to ease Conner’s concerned emotions running through his head at this meet up
3. Maybe he would saying that in a paraphrase “Conner really didn’t have much places to stay so eventually he came to us and we took him in. It was for the best frankly”
4. Yep he would, in good hearted snark as it was just so obvious for him
5. Oh very much indeed
6. As a means of spending time with the two youngest members of the Kents on top of doing his job that he loves, Jimmy joins right in for this story no doubt
Hope these asks work out my friend @we-cross-universe-king-relate
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Session 2 (part 2)
The party release the praying mantis (who was in solitary) before crawling through the vent into the kitchen. Their stealth fails and they’re caught by Little Jimmy the ant who Bob shoves in a supply closet to silence (he was shouting in awe about how they’re the 1st humanoids he’s ever seen). Suddenly Stirling starts crying (the 1st of 5 times this session) about how he doesn’t want the kid or their family to die. We characterised this as Varien being a new dad seeing his son (Perri) in Jimmy and realising all the ants they’re about to drown have parents and people they care about like he does. Varien sees a notice saying that at 10 years old the ants can start exploiting outside the ant hill, which is why Jimmy was so excited seeing people from the outside. Sting cry’s so much the party changes their plans to stop the river from flooding the ant hill and escape another way.
Sting cry’s over irl and in game things (eg. Kings saying my plushy thinks Sting hates him like what) so he must have been pretty emotional that day. The party plots to save the ants and Varien remembers the other prisoners so he goes to free them from the flood. He enters the room and all the prisoners flee after his suggestion, everyone except Tori Winterfall who shouts “IS IT MY FAULT THE DUNGEON IS FLOODING?!”, Jam knocks her out and the party carry her to safety. Plan A to stop the waterfall is the ‘control water’ spell but the party can’t access it. Perri remembers reading somewhere that praying mantis’s have the power to create their own solar lazar/mini sun (and therefore should be able to evaporate the water flooding into the ant hill). The party search for the praying mantis and when they find it Varien (they became mates while it was in solitary) uses ‘speak to animals’ to convince it to help them (I’m so proud of how I acted the mantis, the voice, vocabulary and speech patterns were on point!!)
The mantis begins to create the solar beam and you see the bright light reflect against the running water plummeting into the cave beside you. Sweat drips down your faces as steam rises up towards the ceiling, “To avoid proving your mortality you may want to exit the water instantaneously” says the mantis as the party feel the liquid encasing their legs begin to boil and bubble around them. They climb into the vent and watch the scene from above. As the last of the mist drifts upwards past you all, you blink to see the dungeon floor sparkling clean reflecting yourselves and the mantis in a gorgeous golden hue. “It’s beautiful,” Varien gasps before the party crawl back into the kitchen.
The ant colony are in panicked disarray fearful about the future of their hive. Varien reassures them that everything is fine, his eyes connecting with the ant queen as he remembers he is still their prisoner. She sighs and tells them to get out of her sight before she changes her mind. She’s not gonna risk drowning her clan just to keep a few adventures encaged. The party leaves the dining room but into the hallway they bump shoulders with a familiarly sounding group of teenage ants. The party recognises their voices and realises these are the bandits who kidnapped them. Dakota examines their belongings most of them appear to be things they’ve stolen from the party as well as a freshly sharpened and shined long sword engraved with the familiar initials M.L.F, the bandits remind him of his younger self. Coda, always quick to action shouts “EXCUSE ME ABOUT THAT SWORD?” The bandits sneer at him and all look towards their captain who nods, Perri feels nerves prickle on his back as he realises they’re watching his dad and preparing to strike. Instinctively he casts ‘sleep’, one of the spells Varien taught him as a kid which knocks out 3 of the 6 enemies. The bandits drop their offensive stance instantly and look towards Coda, “what do you wanna know?” Says their 2nd in command, the leader glares at him. Coda begins interrogating the bandits:
Coda: where’d you get the sword from?
Bandit: stole- borrowed from a umm… abandoned house!!
Coda: who’d you take it from?
Bandit: people, in the house.
Coda: what did they look like?
Bandit: wallpaper!!
Coda: what race were they?
Bandit: changeling and they um… made themselves look like the walls!! *the other bandits collectively face plant*
Coda: Oh yes… changelings are… so scary, haha… what were their names?
Bandit: White and um- beige.
Coda: Ok stop lying, what were their real names?
Bandit: Blanco y marrón??
Perri, tired and ready for his nap lights them on fire to Varien’s dismay. “Oh they’ll be fine V, stop stressing!!” Growls Dakota, Varien shakes his head in response. Jam sneaks past all the sleeping guards and steals a tapestry (covered in ✨lore✨ stuff- I might reblog this post with a description of it) from the treasury. The party leave the ant hill with Dakota muttering questions about his new sword, “there’s a lovely magical blacksmith in Laketown. I’m travelling there next if you and your friends would like to come with me?” Says Fennel. The party pack up their cabin and join her in heading to Laketown. When they arrive in Laketown I show them the drawing (by @w1lmuttart) below; “what is that?” Varien asks, “that is the Mountain’s Child.” Fennel responds and the session ends.
#stariel posts#speak no harm#session notes#Varien took#Dakota Quinton Maxwell finch#faragrim punch you in the face guy#perrigren ezry#jam the lier#fennel plutoseed#mt windslow#praying mantis tag#previous campaigns
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Survivor Series (1987)
Right! The first Survivor series, okay let’s go. How does this work then? So a team of multiple people exchange places and the last team is the winner right? Makes sense! And the team on the outside absolutely keeps position and will not interfere, right? Haha yeah okay…
So moving on, let’s consult the teams and the matches they inhibit.
When you're torn between calling the big game and leading the Mayflower crew...
So let’s start with Jesse “The Body” Ventura coming out dressed as a pilgrim and stating that “I’m gonna have me a good time on Turkey Day even in Cleveland if you can imagine that!” So I guess it’s Thanksgiving, and that Cleveland sucks? Gorilla monsoon fails to comment on this fact. We get the breakdown on what qualifies as “rules” in this event and I have to say I kinda dig it. Having a last-man-standing kind of event does mix things up a bit from the standard 1v1 brawls.
Elvis is alive...to kick your ass
Brutus Beefcake, Jake Roberts, Jim Duggan, Randy Savage and Ricky Steamboat V Dangerous Danny Davis, Harley Race, Hercules, The Honky Tonk Man and Ron Bass - I’m seeing Macho Man and Ricky Steamboat on the same team and thinking, honestly how can they lose. Combine with other meaty stars like “pure ‘murican patriot” Jim Duggan and a man who uses a python for intimidation and I can’t think how the other team can shape up!
Pre-match promo from Honky Tonk is quite unhinged, everyone jeering themselves up including The King, and Hercules just gurning in the background, working the rest of the cocaine out of his system. Meanwhile Macho Man’s team seems to struggle to get themselves heard over a local rock band playing in the background.
This was a high energy match for sure and that matches the talent being put in the ring. Macho man getting the majority of the cheers. Ultimately Randy gets Honky Tonk out of the ring who bolts it in the face of superior numbers. Good drama, solid introduction to this format of wrestling. -Tier 2-
Velvet's choice was pinfall or yoga, not both...
The Fabulous Moolah, The Jumping Bomb Angels, Rockin' Robin and Velvet McIntyre V Dawn Marie, Donna Christanello, The Glamour Girls and Sensational Sherri - So a few female wrestlers I’ve seen before; Velvet, Moolah and the Glamour Girls have made appearances in the previous entries. Though I’m not sure what WWF’s status with Women’s Wrestling is at this time as it seems to be treated as a serious match over the TNA appeal featured in later years.
There is definitely energy going on in the ring with lightning fast takedowns and flips going on all over the place. But I think the most interesting combatants here are the Jumping Bomb angels, who secure the win with some impressive in ring acrobatics and drama as Jimmy Hart once again bites the dirt. -Tier 3-
"And which section of Hot Topic do you get your outfits from..."
The British Bulldogs, The Killer Bees, The Fabulous Rougeaus, Strike Force and The Young Stallions V The Bolsheviks, Demolition, The Dream Team, The Hart Foundation and The Islanders - I think this is too many people, however I do recognise Tonga Fifita as the father of Tama Tonga and Tonga Loa, and the whole Bloodline angle going on in modern wrestling, considering how 90% of modern WWE is Anoa’i related I like seeing their fathers in the ring. Somehow the Killer Bees are here joining the Rougeaus who seem to be trying to compete on style over conflict, and somehow still losing.
I think somehow this match has too many people in it, and despite gimmicks and personalities, overstays its welcome a little bit. There are bits and pieces of relevant drama, slams, cheers and cheating, however at over 37m long it’s hard to keep my attention. That being said it’s a fairly exciting fight if you can stay tuned, with a dramatic finish from a fake masked Killer Bee, yes, I said that, those words happened. -Tier 3-
"Please, look at my array of large men..."
André the Giant, Butch Reed, King Kong Bundy, One Man Gang and Rick Rude V Bam Bam Bigelow, Don Muraco, Hulk Hogan, Ken Patera and Paul Orndorff - I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Andre is such a freaking huge man, literally dwarfs the announcer two to one. Even King Kong Bundy, who would actually be a reasonable contender for Andre, seems tiny in comparison. First appearance for me of Bam Bam Bigelow who I understand becomes a bigger deal in the future, and The Rock? Oh wait no it’s Don “The Rock” Muraco, who probably got some legal action with Dwayne Johnson’s estate, who comes into the ring looking like he took all the steroids. Come on man, leave some for the rest of us…
This match probably has the best hype and action of all the others tonight. And that’s even with a surprise count out to Hogan mid match, which almost seemed like a botch until he came out post-match to bring the heat to Andre. Some superb wrestling from the best in the business at that time with Andre taking Bam Bam by pinfall. A great conclusion to a fun event! -Tier 1-
"Let me tell you brother, I can't see a freaking thing"
Notable Dialogue:
Hulk Hogan - “There’s no rules when you deal with mother nature, there’s no insurance policy whether you die or survive. But I tell you what, I’ve done everything I could to cover my back man!”
Jesse “The Body” Ventura - “I’m gonna have me a good time on Turkey Day even in Cleveland if you can imagine that!” Survivor Series (1987) Rating: 8 Batshit Crazy Promo's Out Of 10
Up Next: The Royal Rumble (1988)
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Top Songs of 1965 - Hits of 1965
Top Songs of 1965 - Hits of 1965 Top Songs of 1965 including: Barry McGuire - Eve Of Destruction, Bob Dylan - Like A Rolling Stone, Bob Lind - Elusive Butterfly, Charles Aznavour - La Bohème, Chris Andrews - Yesterday Man, Del Shannon - Keep Searchin', Diana Ross & The Supremes – Stop! In The Name Of Love and many more! Subscribe to our channel to see more of our content! 1. Barry McGuire - Eve Of Destruction 2. Bernd Spier - Das War Mein Schönster Tanz 3. Bob Dylan - Like A Rolling Stone 4. Bob Lind - Elusive Butterfly 5. Charles Aznavour - La Bohème 6. Chris Andrews - Yesterday Man 7. Christophe – Aline 8. Conchita Velasco – Una Chica Ye-Yé 9. Del Shannon - Keep Searchin' 10. Diana Ross & The Supremes – Stop! In The Name Of Love 11. Donovan – Catch The Wind 12. Drafi Deutscher - Marmor, Stein Und Eisen Bricht 13. Dúo Dinámico - Esos Ojitos Negros 14. Elvis Presley - Crying In the Chapel 15. Fontella Bass – Rescue Me 16. Four Tops - I Can't Help Myself 17. France Gall – Poupée De Cire, Poupée De Son 18. Gary Lewis & The Playboys - Save Your Heart For Me 19. Gerry & The Pacemakers - Ferry Cross The Mersey 20. Gianni Morandi - Si Fa Sera 21. Herman's Hermits - Can't You Hear My Heartbeat 22. Herve Vilard – Capri C’Est Fini 23. Jackie DeShannon – What The World Needs Now Is Love 24. James Brown - Papa's Got A Brand New Bag 25. Jay & The Americans - Cara Mia 26. Jewel Akens - The Birds & The Bees 27. Jimmy Fontana – Il Mondo 28. Johnny Hallyday - Quand Revient La Nuit 29. Julie Andrews - Do-Re-Mi 30. Julie Andrews - The Lonely Goatherd 31. Julie Andrews & Christopher Plummer - Edelweiss 32. Los Sirex - La Escoba 33. Marianne Faithfull - This Little Bird 34. Mariema - O Fado Mora em Lisboa 35. Martha & The Vandellas - Nowhere To Run 36. Paul Revere & The Raiders - Just Like Me 37. Peggy March - Mit 17 hat man noch Träume 38. Roberto Carlos - O Calhambeque 39. Roger Miller – King Of The Road 40. Ronny - Kenn ein Land 41. Salvatore Adamo - Mes Mains Sur Tes Hanches 42. Sam The Sham And The Pharaohs – Wooly Bully 43. Sandie Shaw - Long Live Love 44. Sonny & Cher – I Got You Babe 45. The Animals – Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood 46. The Beach Boys - Help Me Rhonda 47. The Beach Boys – Barbara Ann 48. The Beatles - Help! 49. The Beatles – Yesterday 50. The Beau Brummels - Just A Little 51. The Byrds – Turn! Turn! Turn! 52. The Dave Clark Five - Catch Us If You Can 53. The Hollies - I'm Alive 54. The Hollies - Look Through Any Window 55. The Kinks - Till The End Of The Day 56. The Lovin’ Spoonful – Do You Believe In Magic 57. The McCoys - Fever 58. The McCoys ~ Hang On Sloopy 59. The Righteous Brothers – Unchained Melody 60. The Rolling Stones - Get Off Of My Cloud 61. The Rolling Stones – (I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction 62. The Seekers - The Carnival Is Over 63. The Sonics – Psycho 64. The Temptations - It's Growing 65. The Who – My Generation 66. The Yardbirds – For Your Love 67. Tom Jones - It's Not Unusual 68. Wayne Fontana & The Mindbenders – The Game Of Love 69. We Five - You Were on My Mind 70. Wilson Pickett – In The Midnight Hour Related Searches: Greatest Hits of 1965, Best Jukebox 1965 Playlist, Late 1965 Non Stop , Top 1965 Non Stop, Mix 1965 Compilation, Best 1965 List, Late 1965 UK, Best 1965 Playlist, Best 1965 Non Stop, Best 1965 Video, Greatest 1965 Non Stop, Mix 1965 Playlist, Best Jukebox 1965 List, List of 1965 Mix, Top 1965 USA, Best Songs of 1965, Top Music 1965, Hits of 1965 Relate Hashtags: #songsof1965 #hits1965 #songs1965 #listof1965mix #hits1965 #bestsongs1965 #classic1965playlist #greatest1965nonstop #best1965list #best1965video #top1965mix #greatest1965video #mix1965playlist #top1965nonstop #mix1965compilation This Youtube channel does not receive any advertising income, we are very grateful for any Paypal donation, no matter how small, to continue making videos about the history of music. Link: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=HEHMNQ4E3T3ML https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VrAIMeeeWgo
#80S Greatest Hits#Songs Of 1980S#Old Songs#80S Songs#80S Music Hits#80S Hits#80S Songs Playlist#Grea
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I was thinking about this again and got S1 figured out!! got silly, tell me what u guys think :3
Grand Oceankeeper False - With fuzzy memories of why she’s there, Ocean Queen False is the literal embodiment of a ‘wet towel’, though other empires, especially Lost Emperor Pix, warn of her fighting abilities if you do damage to her people or her coral castle. She feels strange, yet comfortable, around the premise of flowers, especially pinker ones. This has led to her upkeeping a happy, yet awkward alliance with the Overgrown!
Copperwatch Shelby - With a strange connection to spirits, who commonly send messages to her (sometimes, of the threatening variety, with llamas and bees on skewers), Copperwatch Shelby has found herself taking on the role of the link between life and death in her own empire, Glowandria. She commonly uses candles to protect the current living, but rumor has it that she’s been seen messing with a strange glowing sculk of the deepest dark- and in far ends of the lands, people have seen wanted posters with her face.
Lord Katherine - With a dedication to making the people of Starland happy with no other, Lord Katherine has tried her best to do that even with keeping a great secret from the other empires- that being, a strange vine-y corruption that has clung onto her since birth, making more and more people fear and flee from the land and into the seas. Luckily, she’s found a kind, golden face who promises that she can help..
King Scott - An ex-adventurer who has finally settled down, his time messing with artifacts has messed with his body and given him a cloth-like appearance, of which has ironically inspired him to build his empire to be very wool-like, which he named Mezalea as a joke.. but never really got around to changing it. He didn’t realize until far later that the artifacts have strangely messed with his mind as well, as he can’t see any kind of golden figure that his friends describe- he can see red though. Plenty of red.
Gilded Shepard Joe - Joe had never intended to be a farmer, but a rival had challenged him to it and he found himself in the lands, working daily and.. eventually growing to love it, eventually more and more people joining his land and he eventually named it Gilded Helianthia. He grew attached to the plants he would grow, commonly selling them for higher prices as jokes… sort of. The only one to ever take the higher price was the one who held great profit in a golden palm, but he sensed something was off and rejected it.. and he was right, when his previous crush Lord Katherine invited him to create an arena together (he had assumed it was a date, and that she just wanted to see his strength… but..)
Nobility Fwhip - With a stern, rough history for the Overgrown, Nobility Fwhip tried his best to repair the rocky relationships that his empire had with others in the past- though, not being taken too seriously by the others in charge. While not being concerned for the people around him and what they think of him, he’s also a casual alchemist, later being considered the most crucial part in taking down the one who dared to rot his flowers.
Count Lizzie - Secretly a vampire, she found herself accidentally destroying the life around her empire, The Grimlands, as redstone trickled around her. With this, she basically decided ‘fuck it’ and got bigger with the casual destruction- explosions, smoke, just stuff she loved tinkering with. She grew concerned when her ally, Lord Katherine, began discussing a stranger.. only to grow furious when Katherine, while swearing apologies, hurt her and especially her brother, Grand Wizard Jimmy- admittedly, this led her to coming in during the night and draining some blood from the Lord, an act she’d do again when Prince Gem burnt Jimmy.
PapaCarp Sausage - Found at the edges of the swamp, he wasn’t noticed to have any fish qualities about him, but his eagerness for the Carplands and with no other place to go, Sausage eventually found himself declared the ‘Carpfather’, but he tried to get others to refer to him as ‘PapaCarp’ instead. In reality, he secretly uses this position to keep an eye on the current Oceankeeper.. he worries for False, quite simply, and feels as if there’s more to her than she even knows.
Grand Wizard Jimmy - An awkward man who struggled with spellcasting, he always questioned how and why he was chosen outside the rest to be “Grand Wizard” of the Crystal Cliffs. The reason being quite simple: Though his common mishaps were disappointing, his bursts of unexplainable magic were stronger than everyone’s ever seen. He’s learned that with enough preparation, and help from others, he can do great things- such as banishing evil into crystal. Though, there are times where he struggles to ask for help, such as when he was burned by Prince Gem.
Prince Gem - Always bursting with joy, much like the nearby volcanoes, Prince Gem of Rivendell remained stoic, yet a pleasure to be around with small hints of sarcasm every now and then. She sought the help of a strange god, who kept talking about his muscles, when her dear friend.. she doesn’t like to think about it. However, the deals she made with this trickster god messed her up in the long run, when she found herself to have flame abilities that she didn’t know how to control.
Lost Emperor Pix - A sheltered man who opts to stick to his own empire, due to his endless curiosity. After all, the history of The Lost Empire is.. well, lost. Even to the inhabitants in it. He only opted to peek his head out briefly, due to the concern of wanting to help a lost gnome, and then the eager encouragement of gentle golden hands, but after she had warped his mind, he tucked himself deep into the jungle and never reared his face again- at first, for paranoia, but soon he realized the more history and temples he uncovered, the more his body faded.
Olive Tree - A gnome who got bored of his own people and ventured out every night- once, finding a trembling woman who seemed cold, even with her burnt hoodie. He took her home and tried befriending her, even learning recipes special to her- but, eventually, he found out why she was there, and that led to a major argument, since he thought he was going to be next.. and, in a sense, he was, when he had to flee the lands of his people when the stranger turned to gold.
Pearl, the Forgotten - Pearl had grown up with two incredibly close friends, Gem and Impulse. However, she always yearned for something greater… when a strange figure who appeared during a storm approached her, promising shining riches more than she’s ever seen… she blacked out for a while, and awoke to confusion as to why Gem stared at her with horror, when she realized the blood on her hands- her golden hands.
God Joel - One rumored to be able to make the lightning spark with his ass, he has for years approached mortals and offered them blessings in the form of tricks. He’s simply bored of immortality and wants some cheap entertainment, as decades of turning against his friends as a mortal was ingrained in his mind as normalcy.
//
notes -
Pixandria and Mythland were changed to Glowandria and Starland respectively due to being named after their canon founders. Instead of naming them after their swapped founders, however, I opted to try to keep the theme in other ways.
• Glowandria due to the glow of spirits, the glow of life-protecting candlelight, and the glow of sculk- which helps the first two, something Copperwatch Shelby won’t admit.
• Starland in reference to Starquest.
Codlands was also changed, to Carplands, but that was more for the funsies.
i made my own empires swap au bc i thought it would be fun and it was!! it’s more based on the concept behind undertale storyshift
Sheriff Joey - A once lost individual who was taken in by a sheriff and trained to be the successor. He still keeps to himself, finding secrecy to be the best way to take down illegal activity. He can’t help but to get lonely, especially after demoting Shrub as deputy and giving the position to a cat instead.
Goblin Shrub - The last goblin and self promoted leader as there is none to compete in height, she hid into the caves when a strange glowing corruption took over her people and remained down there for years until eventually being found by Sheriff Joey, who she worked to impress and befriend before being rejected by him and being left to cure her people alone.
Great Witch Scott - A once beloved prince of a grand magical empire, of which created an ancient glowing corruption by sheer accident, being brought to this area to scout in secret so it could take over the entire area including the empires within it. However, he didn’t enjoy the idea of being spent to spy on the people he’s grown so close to, and instead chose to help them with his ice magic as best he could. The royal council declared that if he reared his head in their direction, he’d be executed with no hesitation.
Grand Architect Gem - An amnesiac who’s only true memory is the importance and safety of amethyst crystals, alongside mysterious signs that warn her of night. Later found out that she was once from a world where the moon tore through the earth, and she forced herself to forget due to the trauma, and left herself with no direction but a desire to feel a sense of family again.
God Fwhip - A lone, fanged god who tries to recreate what he once thought was a perfect world, creating pools of red and stone spires from the ground. If anyone dares to question him, he hopes they won’t miss their blood.
Protector Jimmy - Living in the ocean with his people, he was attacked by an evil tyrant of a salmon who chased the cod off and rejected him from his home. The cod have evolved to have the ability to move on land and took refuge in a seaside village, Jimmy promising to protect them all, and choosing to ignore the visions of red murderous magic.
Princess Pearl - Someone who works as a tailor and shows herself to her kingdom as a princess at day, she is under the cover of night spars with both her allies and enemies. After her loyalty was questioned by finding herself working with those revealed to be enemies, she’s forced herself to work harder both as a leader and a protector.
Chromia Pix - After leaving his home at a time of destruction, he traveled across the world and investigated skeletons and the like, always protecting their spirits and helping them live on as a ghost with his multicolored candles. These efforts, however, came to him losing his eye, of which he doesn’t regret.
Mayor Katherine - Living in fear of what others would think of her, Katherine lives in secrecy pretending to be a human while in reality she is a cat. She wants her animal-based society to remain in peace, and tries to keep positive allyship with all of the empires, trying to ignore the stress weighing in on her.
Pirate Saus - A proud captain whose ship and crew were overtaken by his enemy, a rivalry only started by their petty thievery to each other, and he found himself washed up on the shore. He’s made an attempt to build himself back up and even has begun learning magic from other empires in an attempt to prove himself, unaware about how this magic could overtake him.
Archeologist Lizzie - With no memories left, Lizzie found herself drawn to history to look for answers, feeling closer to herself with every artifact and structure she uncovers.
Prince Joel - A man who believes in nothing but your own self worth, and the sun. He doesn’t think anything could be wrong as long as the sun still rotates around, and despite his desire to stay under his rays, he can’t help but be drawn to the underground with it’s bright, unnatural fire.
felt silly and goofy, what do u think
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fic recs 2.0!
hello kings (gn) ive got significantly more fic than last time which means this is gonna be a little more organized than the last post bc it is much longer <3 categories in order are non casefic canonverse, casefic/roadtrip fic, finale fixits, endverse, non supernatural aus, and then non destiel ones. titles will be in bold for my favs! also within each category they’re in order from shortest to longest
Canonverse
I’m a tulip in a cup by godtiering (1.2k)
I worry that I never really came back from hell. I wonder why, if I got remade by heaven, I’m still the same screwed up kid that I always was.
Sometimes I worry I’m not into women at all.
"Guess not,” he looks at his shoes.
a REALLY good fic that’s basically just a look inside dean’s head during my bloody valentine do not read this looking for a fun time but please do read it
on vessels by flightsofangels (1.9k)
“You know,” Cas mutters into Dean’s bare skin. “When I was still… an angel, I used to dream that I would take you as my vessel.”
hello consumehimnatural fans!!!!! read newt’s fic right now its incredible
dean winchester is not a nicholas sparks protagonist by microcomets (1.9k)
Dean fell in love with Cas the way you fall asleep--slowly, and then all at once. Or some other hackneyed and trite bullshit. God, this is embarrassing.
dean is in LOVE. he’s also a disaster who keeps staring at cas’ hands. sigh
Stay by aeli_kindara (2.5k)
Coda to 13.06 (Tombstone). In which Castiel reckons with the aftermath of Dean's grief.
hello fellow widow arc fans <3 click here to see cas find out abt the events of advanced thanatology !
walking on a string by swordfishtrombones (2.7k)
Between the doomed offensive at the Firmament and the impending retreat from the ravaged northeast border, Castiel left camp long enough to answer one of Dean Winchester's prayers.
S6 DEAN IS A WAR WIFE. been really into early seasons deancas lately and this one is very good. god
the flesh of the mighty by Mudprophet (2.7k)
Ezekiel 39:17 "you shall eat the flesh of the mighty and drink the blood of the princes of the earth."
MY GOD. anyone who saw the @autisticandroids purgatory cannibalism talk and was interested read this right now. also anyone who enjoyed nbc hannibal OR raw (2016). if romantic cannibalism is remotely aligned with your interests read this right now. god
Sam Winchester, Ally At Law by alittleduck (3.3k)
Sam was pretty sure he could read every single gay friendly guide to coming out or supporting queer family members ever written and literally none of them would even imply that arguing with gay people that they were actually just homophobic constituted as "ally behavior". However, Sam was equally sure that none of those book authors had found themselves accidentally watching their brother get pounded by an Angel of the Lord at 9 am on Tuesday, so Sam was pretty sure he might actually still have the higher ground. Now, if only Jack would stop trying to bond with Dean using gay slurs long enough for Sam to convince everyone of that, he might just be able to cobble together some remnant of sanity or, failing that, dignity.
Or, the one where Sam desperately wants to invent PFLAG but Dean won't stop teaching Jack gay slurs
JACK VOICE HEY COCKSUCKERS.
hummed low by microcomets (3.3k)
Dean pulls the Impala over at a cider barn about thirty miles out; doesn't really think about it, just sees the hokey orange lettering off the roadside and lets his hands guide the Impala off the interstate with gravel spitting under the wheels.
they get a nice day out together and dean has a gay crisis and it’s written beautifully mwah
Vena Amoris and Other Old-Fashioned Bullshit by pyrebi (3.9k)
In which angelic marriage bonds are apparently stupidly easy to trigger, Cas wages multidimensional war in Heaven, Dean can't catch a break like ever, Sam rather enjoys being a dick, love saves the day, and nobody consummates anything.
sometimes i think about this fic and it hits that at this point dean and cas would have been married for more than a year. cas my beloved...
an exploration of gender; angelic by sometimeswelose (4k)
Castiel's true form is made of electromagnetic radiation. He has spent the majority of his life, if you really want to add it all up and average the whole thing out, as a wavelength of celestial intent.
The thing about being made of light: it's light in the physics sense of the word. Castiel's waves are gamma, x-ray, micro, and radio. He's visible light too, of course, a visible light so intense that it is blinding to most humans.
hello trans cas community <3 he’s literally trans he was assigned genderless and then went hm actually i will be a man! love of my life
Some Boys are Sleeping Alone by prosopopeya (4.2k)
This isn't something that's okay, not for him, but it chases him through the years until it turns into something he can't -- doesn't want to deny.
ohhh deans tenuous relationship with his sexuality my beloved...
love. worship. consummation. consumption. by redeyedwrath (4.3k)
ConsumehimNatural (copyright marcusantonius) the Series!
These are all snapshots centered around the idea of you know. Hunger in Supernatural. Both carnal hunger and other kinds. Fics are shown in semi-chronological order but this series is generally nebulously early seasons.
for ANYONE who is a consumehimnaturual this is required reading it is INCREDIBLE and gorgeous and very visceral and i am so very obsessed with it. thank you redeyedwrath for enabling my brainrot
the reach of human sense by perilously (4.5k)
“You know what Jimmy Novak looked like. You think he was beautiful—gorgeous, hot, all of it. It’s him. Not me. This isn’t my face.”
“But,” Dean says. He doesn’t know where he’s going with it. Just that Cas’ face is right there, brows drawn together and cheekbones gleaming in the lamplight. It’s a face that’s made his heart skip probably a couple hundred beats collectively since they met.
And it used to belong to someone else.
this one is just very nice <3 cas gets uncomfortable w dean calling him attractive since dean has never seen his trueform and they work it out
Down in the River by Ias (4.7k)
Alone in Purgatory and hunted by Leviathans, Castiel finds himself praying to the one person who can't hear him.
cas i love you <3 cas alone in purgatory praying to dean bc dean is the only thing he still worships i love you so much
Creature of Habit by trinityofone (5.1k)
The more you love someone, the more you want to kill them. Or: How Cas developed some bad habits, and Dean coped surprisingly well.
written in s5 when cas was depowered and completely nails the later seasons bitchy husbands dynamic it’s very good and fun <3
sink by crackers4jenn (5.4k)
"Where to?" A 9.06 coda.
very bittersweet very well written and also canon compliant so do not go into this one looking for a happy ending but i DO recommend it it’s very good
Sensational by castiowl (6.1k)
“When I first came to earth, it was advised that we temper the senses bound to our vessels. They were a distraction, we were told. An antiquated form of experiencing existence that would hinder our ability to complete our missions, whatever that may be. My true form can better facilitate these experiences. What you would recognize as heightened senses of sight and sound, among other things.”
Or, how Dean helps Cas experience all five human senses for the first time in one night.
early seasons deancas man. i love the sound part i love dean being so worried about doing a good job with this. god. read this please
Something to Protect by Sass_Master (6.2k)
Dean’s violent reaction to being unexpectedly woken has become something of a running joke among them, but Castiel can’t help but look past it to the underlying cause. It makes him ache to think that Dean feels so unsafe, so persecuted, before he’s even fully conscious.
Secretly, Castiel has been determined to work on that, to ease Dean into awareness in a less jarring way, smooth away one of the many stresses that follow him even in sleep. Now’s as good a time as any to try.
oh to sleep more soundly in the presence of someone you love...this fic is very nice i enjoyed it a lot
all this and heaven too by ftmsteverogers (7k)
“Hey,” Dean said. “I’m not ashamed of you, okay?”
Cas raised skeptical eyes to meet his.
“I mean it,” Dean insisted.
“I understand you mean it,” Cas said. “But I don’t think it’s any better if you’re only ashamed of yourself.”
hello trans dean community here is 7k of trans dean having to deal with his internalized homophobia now that he’s sleeping with cas <3 it is SO good
The wilderness. by orange_crushed (8k)
He takes a shower and the pressure is not especially good, but it doesn’t matter. It’s warm and he stands under the spray a long time. Human skin, he knows, constantly renews itself, shedding the dead cells of the epidermis. He wonders how long it will take until he is an entirely new person, until every cell on his surface is a new one. He looks at his hands under the water. It might take less than a month.
this might be the only post 9x03 fic on here with a happy ending actually? plenty of good melancholy leading up to it though <3 canon divergent after 9x03 though which means no 9x06 fanfiction gap but it is absolutely worth reading
till the juice runs by deathbanjo (8.4k)
Apparently whoever drew up the venn diagram of Dean’s sex life decided the circle labelled ‘good sex’ and the one labelled ‘sex with men’ should be kept far apart.
hello this one is SO funny dean finally gets comfortable enough with his bisexuality to start having sex with men and it goes so very bad every time so sorry about your shitty choices beloved </3
First Date by aeli_kindara (8.9k)
“We should go on a date. You and me.”
Castiel wishes he could see Dean’s face. He wishes he had any idea what to say.
“I’m asking you out, Cas.”
this one is very sweet i liked it a lot <3 good refreshing little fic where they just get to have a nice evening together
Entertaining Strangers by cadignan (9k)
Dean settles on to his side, lying in the bed facing Castiel. “So you had sex without me and you bit all my moves. I think I deserve to hear about it, at least. What was her name?”
op im in love with you. premise is established relationship deancas and cas mentions he did have sex before dean and not only that it was a threesome. good for him <3 this fic is cas describing the story of what led up to the threesome and what happened during it while dean interrupts regularly. incredible
the shape you take by noviembre (10k)
“What?” Dean says, fake-offended. “I’d be hot as a girl, you know I would.”
And this is when he really, really should have stopped talking. When he shouldn't have whipped back around and asked, “Cas, if I was a woman, you’d fuck me, right?”
Because if he hadn’t said that, then he wouldn’t have had to deal with this:
Cas, meeting his eyes, forehead wrinkles all smoothed out like there’s nothing to be confused about anymore. Cas with something at the corner of his mouth that might barely be called a smile.
Cas saying, calmly and without hesitation, “Yes, Dean.”
--
Dean Winchester fucks around and, with the inadvertent help of some witches, Finds Out.
dean winchester your gender is diabolical. this fic is insane and its the only thing that matters actually. dean fully convinced its normal and straight to think about being a woman so you can fuck your male friend. incredible. op im proposing to you
Sinnerman by a_good_soldier (10k)
Dean listens to Nina Simone, reads Anne Carson, and makes out with a dude (sort of).
yall want to read about dean realizing he’s in love with a man as a direct result of learning to better respect women right?
you’re fooling yourself by cowboydeanwinchester (13k)
Dean Winchester and Castiel retire from hunting to raise baby Jack. Dean struggles to allow himself the things he truly wants.
Jack is two, Castiel and Dean are idiots, and Sam's gotta solve everyone's problems.
love a married couple who doesn’t know they’re married <3 everyone say thank you sam for bullying dean
The Girlfriend Experience by rageprufrock (15k)
While it's not like Dean hasn't had a couple of truly regrettable hit-and-runs in his sexual history, this is probably the saddest fucking thing that has ever happened to him.
a classic for good fucking reason. we’ve all talked about dean thinking holding hands is too gay after having just had gay sex but my personal favorite was sam accusing dean of cheating on cas because dean bought condoms. incredible
No Kingdom To Come by domesticadventures (16k)
“We should fuck,” Dean says.
Cas looks up from where he sits on his bed, hair still damp from the shower, frowning as he places a finger on the page of his book to mark where he left off.
There are a million things Cas could say here; Dean has rehearsed them. After lunch, his restlessness had given way to a vague panic, a dread that matched his every step and crept along with him from room to room. Eventually, he had returned to his bedroom and spent the rest of the afternoon pacing back and forth, playing out all the possible scenarios. When Cas asks him Why? or Are you being serious? or when he sighs and says, in that way he has, Dean, he knows exactly what he’s going to do. He’s going to shrug casually, like he isn’t invested in the answer, like he isn’t desperate for an outlet, and say, Why not? He’s going to raise an eyebrow and say, What, are you not interested? He’s going to crowd into Cas’ personal space, he’s going to shove himself right up in there and whisper Cas against his ear.
Instead, Cas says, carefully, “Okay.”
literally the only quarantine fic i’ve ever bothered to read in any fandom and completely worth it it’s SO good. they become fwb and dean has an existential crisis and he keeps bringing up meaninglessness and death during sex
Bodies by Speary (18k)
It was a secret they never acknowledged even with each other. It would change everything, end everything if either of them ever dropped the act. So they became very good at acting, at keeping up the lie that gave them what they wanted. Even if that lie involved constantly seeking out temporary, consenting female vessels, Cas would do it. He told himself it was worth it for Dean. He just hoped that he could stop wanting more, or maybe one day Dean might stop pretending that he wasn't really sleeping with Cas every time.
i don’t even have anything to add tbh if that summary did not immediately make you click we are very different this fic is incredible. god. fellas do you ever make yourself a woman so you can fuck the man you love without him having to talk about it or confront his sexuality
it’s such a mystery (the way you know me) by fleeceframe (20k)
So the man crouching in front of Castiel is named Dean. He wonders if that’s supposed to mean something to him.
“Cas must’ve got hit with something earlier. He just dropped like a sack of fucking potatoes a minute ago. By the time I was checking on him, he had already woken up again, but now he doesn’t fucking know who we are.”
“I’m right here you know,” Castiel says testily.
Sam’s eyes are wide even as his eyebrows are furrowed, and he looks between Dean and Castiel again.
“What do you remember, Cas?”
“Firstly, that I’m not Cas. I don’t know who Cas is, but it’s not me. I don’t know who either of you are, either."
or the one where castiel is hit with a memory curse that makes him forget the winchester brothers and is stunned to find out he has a family... also why can't he stop thinking about dean?
BEST amnesia fic oh my god. cas my beloved you deserve the world. everyone read this that is not a request.
More Than Ever by Sass_Master (20k)
Dean’s getting some pancakes together for breakfast when Cas saunters in after a run.
He’s trying to focus on whisking batter, unfairly distracted by Cas a few feet away, breathing heavily and shining with perspiration. Dean’s been painfully aware for a long time that Cas is pretty easy on the eyes, but he’s used to seeing Cas buttoned-up and unflappable, looking straight-laced in a stiff oxford and an unflattering trenchcoat.
Now Cas is sweating, Dean’s borrowed t-shirt clinging to his skin, flushed from exertion and Dean really can’t deal with that in his kitchen right now.
this entire series is really good i enjoyed it a lot, i’m just putting this one specifically on the list bc the rest of the series is very explicit and this is really good as a standalone for anyone who wouldn’t be into the rest of the series!!
Being Dean Winchester by Anonymous (20k)
"You should show me some respect. I dragged you out of hell. I can throw you back in."
Who the fuck was this bitchy "warrior of God" doing talking to him like that? Fuck Cas-tee-el and his dumbass trench coat and abrasive motherfucking attitude.
Dean was done with this shit.
***
Wherein a monster of the week steals the essence of Castiel's vessel, so he must use Dean, recently raised from hell, as a vessel instead.
it is at this point i realize that there are more fics than i expected there to be on this list that involves a threesome with only two people/using the presence of a female body to act like what’s happening is heterosexual. deangirlism is a disease
I Shall Not Want by domesticadventures (20k)
His grace is burning out, and the wasteland it leaves inside him becomes an echo chamber for all the memories, all the fear and doubt and self-loathing he's collected over the years. Things said and done hound him on endless repeat until he's convinced they’ll break through his skin and fill the silence of the bunker.
His head is killing him, and he sits hunched over an open book, not really reading, just digging his fingers into his skull and praying nothing slips through the cracks.
this one is GORGEOUS i love it so so much. dean and cas are both struggling so much to get by and they’re trying to support each other but fucking it up and they have to grow together and learn to cope with the fact that this is where their lives are and they fall in love i need everyone to read this
To Boldly Go by 8daysuntiltheapocalypseiguess (24k)
Title: Just One of Those Things Author: Impala67 Series: TOS Rating: M Summary: Four years into their five-year mission, and all the planets start to look the same.
In which Dean is not Gene Roddenberry, but he does write Star Trek fanfiction.
mx winchester writing star trek fanfiction to process his own trauma <3 this is a wip but it’s SO good and i also have not consumed a single piece of star trek media so it IS definitely readable to anyone who isn’t a star trek fan. please read this
where the weeds take root by deathbanjo (30k)
“Are you happy? Y’know. Just—being here,” Dean says, gesturing to the yard with his beer bottle. “Being with—I mean, you used to fight in celestial wars and—and save the world. Now you’re growing vegetables and talking about chickens.”
this is on here just for the 1.5 people who were putting off this one like i did for no reason. it’s extremely good and it is just gentle. i enjoyed it a lot
Heroes for Ghosts by pantheon_of_discord (42k)
After Sam and Dean are arrested, Castiel is left alone and scrambling to find them. He knows they’re locked away in a government facility, and he’s still able to hear their prayers, but no matter how he tries Castiel can’t seem to track them. He chases leads and even attempts to hunt on his own, but Mary is AWOL, Crowley refuses to help, and Castiel’s options are running out.
Weeks pass, Castiel’s hope dwindles, and through it all Dean prays, keeping them connected. His voice is comforting, frustrating, and occasionally annoying, but in his solitude Castiel comes to cherish it. But then one day, without warning, Dean stops praying, and Castiel is forced to confront some uncomfortable truths about his feelings.
yall ever wonder what it would’ve been like if the sam and dean arrest storyline in s12 was interesting? yeah <3
Teaching Poetry to Fish by aeli_kindara (52k)
In which Castiel teaches poetry to fish. Also, himself. Also, eventually, Dean.
(A series-long story, diverging slightly from canon after S14.)
cas learning about humanity through poetry before dean and thats what led to him developing enough emotion to be lobotomized....cas i love you so much
Emergence by ellispark (58k)
Something’s been missing from Dean’s life for the past three years, a void left after a hunt gone terribly wrong. He often feels a sense of longing with no discernible cause, a need to talk to someone who isn’t there.
A call from an acquaintance leads Dean to James Novak, a man who disappeared more than a decade ago, and suddenly Dean gets the feeling he’s found what he’s been missing. But James isn’t really James — he’s the angel Castiel, who’s wanted by angels, demons and hunters alike. And he may be at the center of the storm that wrecked Dean’s life all those years ago.
another cool amnesia fic!! for unknown reasons everyone forgot cas three years ago but cas didn’t forget anything. cas deserves so much love and support. god
a turn of the earth by microcomets (95k)
Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.
Frigging fantastic.
(Or, in which Castiel gets stuck in Dean’s timeline preseries and Dean kind of hates it—until he doesn’t.)
cas getting to meet and fall in love with pre hell dean just as much as he loves the dean he already knows oh my GOD. i love this fic so much. turn of the earth my beloved
Crossing Lines by sometimeswelose (122k)
Two Deans, one Cas - it's not as sexy as it sounds
Or
An ethics lesson from Hell
Or
The one where Dean from the past meets Dean in the present. They're not sure they like each other very much.
deans intense self hatred vs cas’ unwavering love for every version of dean oh my GOD also this is a wip fair warning but it’s so worth waiting for updates i’m having such a great time with this one i cannot wait to see how it gets ended
Plot Holes by saltyfeathers (160k)
Of course it wasn’t over after the apocalypse.
There was season six. Then there was season seven. Against all expectations, there was season eight. There were the alphas and purgatory, and then the Leviathans, and then the angels fell. Enter season nine. Loose threads Metatron, Abaddon, and Crowley have to be tied up. Sam, Dean, and Cas have to try to tie them while at the same time dealing with their evolving relationships and newfound graceless states.
Amidst all the chaos, someone has started publishing the Supernatural novels again. Convinced there’s something amiss in the pages, Charlie starts her own quest to suss out the truth behind the Winchester Gospels.
With the help of various faces, old and new, they must now not only deal with the typical runs of demons and recently fallen angels, but also reconcile the battles raging inside themselves, as the fate of the world, once again, quite literally lays in the palm of their hands.
saltyfeathers said i WILL make the plot holes in this show mean something because the showrunners are sure as shit never gonna adress them ! and i thank them for it bc this was a really cool read
Casefic/Roadtrip Fic
Deprived Of Every Planet by KelpietheThundergod (9k)
Dean's breathing is audible in the scant space between them, irregular. The motel room is dark, pale blue shadows falling in through the gaps in the blinds. Throwing a pattern of uneven white stripes over the bunched up covers. Over Dean's fingers twisted in the sheets. One half of him in shadow, softened by the dark. The heat of his skin. The tremble of him under Castiel's touch.
He caresses a hand over Dean's chest, slowly. Dean's mouth falls open, his body arching into Castiel's touch. Castiel stops over Dean's heart. Through the fever of his desire, he rejoices about the wonder of experiencing another's heartbeat through one's own senses.
Dean gasps, but then he turns his face away and towards the dark. Eyes closed tight and brows furrowed like something is hurting him.
Castiel stills.
“Dean?”
the case is background on this one but it Does take place over the course of a case so im putting it here. god touchstarved dean trying so hard to work through his shit for cas head in my hands i love this fic so much
before and after breakfast by spocklee (10k)
The monster of the week is a ghost who hates meat, alcohol, and feeling yourself. Guess who it is during the commercials.
chapter 2 of this one.....god. dean and cas you are both so unwell <3 i love everything abt this fic everyone read it now
we shovel all the ashes out by xylodemon (15k)
Dean’s always known things were headed this way. He just figured getting dragged under would be cleaner and easier than jumping in feet-first.
fics that make you go Oh they love each other...also there’s lesbians in it literally what else could you want.
thunder road by dothraki_shieldmaiden (20k)
After Chuck is defeated and the Winchesters settle into life without God, Dean Winchester is bored.
OR: Dean and Cas take a road trip and figure out some stuff along the way.
this fic is just like. it’s kind! this fic is kind it’s just a pleasant experience and i enjoyed it thoroughly. they’re in love and it’s good
Suck It, Judy Garland by GlitterDwarf, midrashic (20k)
It had to be St. Louis. Or, the one where Sam and Cas get fake married for a case, and Dean loses his mind.
actually im gonna defend dean here imagine youre dean and cas gives what definitely sounded like a deathbed love confession while making eye contact with you and then immediately afterwards fake dates your brother. who among us would not have been a bitch about this
best friends without benefits by lizbobjones (20k)
It’s nearing three a.m. and they’ve been on the road a long time. Sam’s been asleep in the back seat since eleven. Giving up and handing the wheel over to Cas and letting the guy who doesn’t sleep drive had seemed like a good idea.
the premise of this fic is so funny. cas voice dean you want to fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid. everyone read this
the taste of gravel in the mouth by deathbanjo (22k)
This is what Cas gave up Heaven for: greasy diner food, shitty motel rooms with even shittier cable, long car rides spent in complete silence except for the same six tapes playing over and over again, and a burnt-out husk of a man who can barely hold a conversation anymore.
alt version of getting rid of the mark of cain, the darkness never happens. this one is VERY heavy but it’s so good and it has a hopeful ending. ive read this one twice and loved it both times
Someone Who’s Feeling For Me by ellispark (45k)
Dean sees her for the first time in nearly six years in some no-name town in Idaho, and it's panic at first sight.
Lisa Braeden, the one woman Dean ever actually had a shot at a real life with, back from where he buried her in his mind. And her hand is on Cas's arm like it's no big deal, like it belongs there. Cas, Dean's dorky, sweet, badass, angelic best friend, and he's just standing there next to Lisa and not moving her hand away.
Dean feels the jealousy rising, and it's not directed where he expected it to be. Because it takes this exact moment for Dean to realize he's in love with his best friend. He's in love with his best friend, and Lisa is looking at Cas like he's the best thing since automatic rifles, and Dean is utterly fucked.
hello op please contact me. please contact me and let me see the inside of your brain. this fic was an unparalleled experience and everyone should also go through it. i love it so very much
Bumper Cars by mansikka (111k)
Two teenagers are missing from an abandoned carnival, and there’s enough to raise suspicion that their disappearance involves a ghost. Dean, Sam, and Cas arrive in town to investigate, though what they find leads them away from those teenagers, and on the trail of a ghost story that churns up things from their past.
Can newly-human Cas, and Dean, with the help of shipper!Sam, work out the mystery behind the abandoned carnival and its ghost, and along the way, figure out the riddle that is them?
one of my absolute fav case fics it forces dean to confront some aspects of johns parenting and work through some shit and also him and cas fall in love and it’s really well done. love this one a lot <3
Finale Fix-its/Finale Denial
Sorry Jimmy by K_K_TiBal (2.1k)
Based on the tumblr textpost:
jellydeans: so are cas and jimmy novak just up in heaven existing at the same time katebushstandean: #jimmy moves to heaven timbuku so that dean stops trying to make out with him every time they run into each other at the heaven grocery store
this one is just extremely funny. local midwestern heterosexual man is forced to play relationship counselor to the dumbest gay people in existence because one of them wore his face
Dean Winchester Really Needs To Make Some Gay Friends by AreYouReady (2.2k)
“Like, I’m trying to think if I’ve had, I don’t know, crushes. If I ever had a gay thing before you came along and just didn’t notice,” Dean said.
Cas suddenly looked down, and away from Dean. If Dean didn’t know better, he would swear Cas looked guilty.
“What is it, Cas?”
“You have had several… gay things before.” Cas still wouldn’t look at him.
“What? When? How come you know this better than I do?”
There was no way the answer to this question wasn’t funny as hell.
dean learning about gay ppl via the memories of dean smith...incredible.
tiny difference (between ending and starting to begin) by sunforgrace (2.4k)
Sometimes Dean catches Cas staring at the sky.
It doesn’t happen often. Not when Dean’s around to tell, anyway. But often enough that he starts to notice.
Eventually Dean starts to recognize the pattern.
Cas just doesn’t watch the sky. He watches the birds.
Chuck is gone, Cas is human, and the world is safe. In the quiet aftermath Dean and Castiel find each other again.
i really don’t have much to say abt this one it is just very good and they love each other so much
Bring Home by cenotaphy (3.8k)
Dean's phone doesn't ring on the drive back to the Bunker, but that's okay. Because—well, maybe Cas lost his cell, what with getting shuffled back and forth between a cosmic void dimension and all. And anyway, Dean doesn't want this conversation to happen over the phone, he wants to—he wants to talk to Cas face-to-face. They should talk face-to-face.
Dean will tell him—
Dean doesn't know what he'll tell Cas. Dean is, in fact, terrified by how utterly and completely he does not know what he'll say to Cas.
cas being forced to face the consequences of sending the risky text that was despair <3
dean’s coworkers vs the heteronormative agenda by cowboydeanwinchester (4.1k)
Dean started working at a local auto repair shop in Lebanon, Kansas about a year ago. His coworkers don't know much about him. Except that he has a wife. Or maybe he doesn't. But he has a kid. Who is either a toddler or a high schooler. Who is either named Jack or Sammy. He also might have a best friend named Cas, but that also might be his wife.
Truth is nobody knows what to make of Dean.
obsessed w people not knowing a single fucking thing about dean because he talks so much and never explains anything. this fic is SO funny
Enhanced Extraction Techniques by goldenraeofsun (5.8k)
The Empty takes Meg’s shape, Samandriel’s, Duma’s, every one of the thousands of angels Cas killed up in heaven. But in the middle of lecturing Cas in the form of Balthazar, it explodes in a burst of light and sound.
Dean Winchester stands in the aftermath.
the empty playing mind games on an awake cas bc it can’t put him to sleep is a thing i like a lot and this is very very good
Speak Silence No More by rea_sunshine (8.1k)
When Dean imagined this moment, it went like this:
Dean bursts into the Empty—guns blazing, chin high, righteous anger coursing through him. No matter what form his plans and fantasies and whiskey-drunk-whispered-promises took, he is always, always successful. When he imagined it, he was finally the hero Cas deserved.
The reality of the moment is this:
It’s fucking cold.
dean and cas STILL managing to not communicate with each other properly after the confession is so funny to me and this fic does it really well. also i like that a human being in the empty, where humans do NOT belong, had some like. consequences
my heart is a compass by lagaudiere (10k)
“There you are,” the Empty says, in Dean’s voice. It’s cold, like Dean’s eyes are cold, his expression set in contempt. It’s the expression Cas feared, he realizes, all the times he thought about saying it. Revulsion. It makes him feel sick in the way that goes beyond physical, here where there is nothing physical left.
The moment before it happened had been so sweet it covered up all the hurt. For years, Cas had been holding back those words, biting down on his tongue to keep from saying them. And now he had said it, and he knew that it was good, knew that it was worth it. But on the other side there is only this.
--
In the Empty, Cas dreams of his regrets, until someone comes looking for him.
one of thee best dean rescues cas from the empty fics out there i love the way his memories are written i love how many of them were ones that this fic came up with to give me new things to have brainworms over instead of just making me more fixated on He Watched Him Rake Leaves than i already am
killing time by orestespdf (11k)
It's been four years since Dean saved Cas from the Empty and confessed his feelings in return, and in their Vermont lakehouse, the retired couple is now learning how to heal. One morning, Dean gives Cas a haircut.
(A character study of Castiel.)
perfect fic perfect fic no notes no complaints they love each other so much and now dean is giving cas a haircut and they’re spending the day together. god.
and every time we kiss, i swear i can fly by knameless (14k)
Every time, Dean tells himself it’s the last.
--
aka, twelve times dean and cas kiss.
a just boy best friends kiss for every season <3 mwah
for which no words exist by MediaWhore (14k)
'a prayer for which no words exist' // richard siken
"Dear Cas who art in my bathtub, give me the strength to be honest about how I feel. For your sake and for mine. Forgive me all the times I wasn’t in the past, all the words I should have said but didn’t. And please stay. Please stay with me when all is said and done. Amen. "
Dean rescues a newly human Cas from the Empty. That's the easy step.
mediawhore i am in LOVE with you oh my god this fic. this fic. dean taking care of cas after rescuing him dean wrapping cas in a blanket oh my GOD
swimming with the fish pond fish by februyuri (17k)
Some time between Dean bleeding out on a makeshift hook in a barn in Ohio and Sam making marshmallows on his funeral pyre, Dean was brought back to life. By Castiel. Again. Dean agreed to it if only to give Jack time to work out the glitches up top. So, now Dean’s back in the land of the living and things are ... actually good, for once.
Or, as good as they can be when demons are attacking Earth, Dean’s failing to get over why he died in the first place, and Cas is suddenly, inexplicably taking every opportunity to casually tell Dean that he loves him.
this is a wip! but it is so good and so worth the read i love it a lot and am very excited for the last chapter. it IS pretty heavy though dean has a LOT to work through
looking like a true survivor (feeling like a little kid) by courfeyrac (20k)
"Jack’s a clever kid—has been ever since he was born, maybe even before that—but Dean’s pretty sure he hasn’t figured out where they’re going yet. And Dean’s… Dean’s excited about it. He remembers planning surprises for Sammy when they were little—saving up quarters and sneaking off to the arcade the year he turned seven, or slipping a book Dean had seen Sammy admiring into his jacket before sprinting out of the store the year he turned twelve. There was only so much Dean could give him back then, hindered by lack of finances and transportation and a father who paid attention. Now, though, Dean’s got a wallet full of cash, a tank full of gas, and the freedom to give his kid the kind of birthday he deserves."
Or, it's Jack's fourth birthday, and the kid wants to go to Build-A-Bear.
EVERYONE READ THIS RIGHT NOW. that is not a request this fic undid me. oh my god. oh my god. they’re a family and they’re going to build a bear and they love each other. oh my god. also no it isn’t a baby jack fic he is 4 and he is also alcal
what’s missing is found (our souls can exhale now) by sobsicles (27k)
It's not the first time Claire has ever gone missing. It is, however, the first time Kaia panics about it. Dean's dragged into the mess, but he soon finds that it's the best thing that could have happened to him.
~~~
"But have you ever just met someone and maybe it wasn't from the first moment, maybe it was after all these other moments that meant more than you ever expected them to, and it seems like your soul just—just—" Kaia makes a helpless gesture with her hands, pushing out, and she breathes out loudly. "Like it can finally exhale. And that person isn't guaranteed to make you happy, but they're—they're important. You just know it, you can't even escape it, you can't let them go. Ever met someone like that, Dean?"
"I—" Dean halts, his mouth hanging open. He's looking at Kaia, who's looking at him, and his heart is fluttering in his throat like a caged bird aching to soar again. His mind threatens to spiral out of control, but he focuses, swallowing hard. "Yeah. Um. I—yeah, I have."
deancas AND dreamhunter we love to see it also dean DOES smoke weed with kaia and apologizes for pulling a gun on her what more could you want in a fic
Command Me To Be Well by prospopeya (28k)
Dean did a lot of thinking about when and how he would get Cas back. Months of it, actually, stretching into a year, because while Sam and Eileen were settling into their new lives, Dean was stuck. He was stuck in a faraway corner of the bunker, dark and empty and hollow, ringing with the sound of a vibrating phone.
So when he falls to his knees in that same room, exhausted, hurting, breathless, and he feels a hand on his shoulder and looks up to see Cas, he realizes that he doesn't have a single clue about what to do now. Getting Cas out had been easy--actually, it'd been the opposite of that--but the planning of it, the methodical desperation of one attempt after the other had been a familiar rhythm. It'd been soothing almost, solid, something to focus on that wasn't Cas's eyes, watery and jubilant in a way Dean hadn't ever seen that up close on anyone, let alone Cas.
And now Cas is pulling him to his feet, and Dean's stumbling, and he instinctually grabs Cas's arm, and his hand lights up with a fire that he isn't prepared for.
"Hello, Dean."
oh post despair lack of communication....oh dean refusing to work through his feelings...this fic is incredible i love it everyone who enjoys dean doing everything in his power to avoid talking about feelings up to and including having sex with the guy who’s in love with him multiple times should read this
break the skin (to break the barriers) by sobsicles (29k)
The first time she meets him, he's nothing more than an almost-missed appointment.
SOBSICLES TATTOO FIC MY BELOVED. dean grieving and getting tattoos and it turns into tattoo therapy. im SO in love with mitzi it’s insane. requires some suspension of disbelief for how long a tattoo takes but it’s an incredible fic and an unparalleled experience. sobsicles does not miss
ascend by quiettewandering (53k)
Something in the world is wrong.
Demon activity is rising where mysterious black substance oozes and unusual ecological events are shaking the world. Dean, grief hanging on his shoulders, restlessly searches for answers that might lead him to the Empty… and to Cas.
But what Chuck wrote can’t be undone. The narrative thread pulls Dean along, forcing him to comply. Because once a story already has an ending, it can’t be rewritten.
Or can it?
SUPER cool concept i liked this a lot i’m pretty sure everyone’s read it already but just in case someone hasn’t you absolutely should
oh sooner or later it all comes down to faith by sobsicles (62k)
Getting used to Heaven is something of a marvel. It ain't perfect, and Dean thinks he'd hate it if it was, which is probably why it isn't.
~~~
"You don't understand," Dean whispers, exhaling shakily. "I know you don't, because even I don't. The instant you were gone, I wanted you back. Cas, I wanted you back. I wanted—I wanted—"
Cas stares at him, searching his face. After a moment, his own face falls slack, eyes widening just so. "Oh," he breathes out.
Dean wants to be furious that Cas has figured it out before he has—whatever it is—but he's not even that surprised. Cas knows him too well, always has, even more than Dean knows himself. He's been kicking Dean in the goddamn teeth with how deeply he understands him, even about the things Dean doesn't, ever since they first met. You don't think you deserve to be saved, that's what Cas had said. All bundled up in impossibilities and power, this being that looked at Dean Winchester and knew every single inch of him, as if he had a right to each part.
"What?" Dean grits out.
"I love you, too."
the ONLY heaven fic. i do not read heaven fics bc i refuse to budge in my finale denialism i refuse to read fic where it is accepted that dean dies. i was hesitant to read this but god im glad i did it was so good. literally the best possible outcome of dean dying
Endverse
final fantasy. by orange_crushed (1.9k)
“If I’d actually been born human, would I have gotten sick like everyone else? Would I be running around gnawing on the neighbors?” Castiel tilts his head up and even from here Dean can see the black ring of his pupils, wide and dark as dead stars. He’s high as fuck and he’s been loading the guns for forty-five minutes. He stares into the space where Dean is. He smiles and shows his teeth. “Maybe you’d have already put a bullet in my head.”
"This is why you don’t lead storytime anymore," Dean says. "This kind of shit."
endverse last night on earth fics are something that can be so personal actually. god
The Last Song by Moorishflower (3.5k)
The very last song is the Song of Solomon, and Castiel sings it only for Dean. Set in "The End."
this is like. pre endverse and the tone is so like. wistful? is the best word ive got? it’s gorgeous i love it but fair warning there is graphic description of like. viscera and infected wounds
to think that we could stay the same by cipherwriter (6.5k)
cas has all he needs; himself, his creation, and enough power to continue this cycle for a long time. he's fine. dean wants to take care of him anyway.
oh my GOD this one is good it’s based off the thing of how originally endverse cas was supposed to be just sitting in a room killing and resurrecting the same cockroach over and over. very bittersweet at some points i love it a lot, do not read it if youre looking for something happy though lmao
the first church at the end of the world by withbloodstainedclothingon (11k)
The angels don’t eat the brain. Only Croats do that.
this one is fucked but it’s incredible it contains very heavy and violent subject matter and cas is an Actual cult leader he doesn’t just have orgies it is SO well done and i had a great time reading it i recommend it very highly if the warnings sound like something you can stomach
Down to Agincourt by seperis (1.1 million. i know. yes it’s a wip)
There is no such thing as a guarantee when it comes to war.
The outcome's known. Why try? Return your rusty sword to battered sheath, bow your head and bend your stubborn knee. Why take the field when you cannot win the war? But Harry -- he went down to Agincourt.
PLEASE. i know the length is intimidating i KNOW it’s a very long fic but please. please read down to agincourt i am begging you. head in my HANDS this series is incredible.
Non Supernatural AUS
Long-Term Relationship by bendingsignpost (2.7k)
Castiel says, budging over to make room for Dean on the couch, “I thought we should have a serious talk about our relationship.”
Reflexively, Dean laughs.
Castiel does not.
“Uh, Cas... you know we’re not dating, right?”
look man it’s bendingsignpost okay. it’s bendingsignpost it’s good and it’s sweet and you should read it
One White Lie by komodobits (11k)
Castiel takes a deep breath and rings the doorbell. He doesn’t need to run through what he’s going to say – he’s already planned and edited and rehearsed it a thousand times. He is going to ask Dean Winchester out to dinner. If it’s not too forward, he’ll say, perfectly charming. You see, I’ve seen you around the neighbourhood and you always seem so earnest and I’d really like to get to know you bette— The door swings open, and Castiel panics.
He intends to excuse himself. He means to apologise and come back some other time. However, in a moment of blind fear, what comes out of his mouth instead are the words, “Could you spare a moment for Jesus Christ?”
do you ever pretend to be a jehovahs witness for months to hang out with the guy you like because you fucked up asking him out? yeah.
separate ways and sleeping dogs by sobsicles (53k)
Dean is three years sober when Cas comes back into town.
~~~
For a moment, they just stare at each other. Dean, once again, has to swallow the urge to offer to swallow something else. It's very hard to resist the gut-wrenching pull of want that hooks in his chest whenever he looks at Cas. And to think, he used to have him, used to be able to act on that want.
God, he's so fucking stupid.
Well, there's no point in kicking himself three years later for shit he can't change. He'll just sit right here and pretend that his fingers aren't twitching with the urge to reach out and touch. He can't do that anymore, and it's his own damn fault.
"Three years ago," Cas prompts.
Dean huffs a weak laugh. "Yeah. Eventful."
this fic hit me SO hard emotionally oh my god. don’t have much to say bc most of my thoughts on this fic are very personal but my god read this please
Everyone’s a Critic by Englandwouldfall (109k)
The one where uninspired chef Dean Winchester has a one night stand with the male (!) food critic who described the flavour of his garlic bread as 'closeted' and accidentally ends up dating him to try and prove that he's a kick ass chef, thank you very much.
(He may have a point about the 'closeted' thing).
this one is SO fun. dating the food critic who called your garlic bread closeted and lying about your career because you’re embarrassed and you want to redeem your food in his eyes but then you fall in love with him
Non Destiel Centric
gender? you mean that thing i have that pisses people off? by bigender dean winchester (homosexualitie) (946 words)
sam and dean paint each other's nails and dean abuses the technicalities of her gender. what more could you want?
HELLO HE/SHE DEAN COMMUNITY oh my god the pure rush of euphoria reading this. oh my god. oh my god.
the quiet road to a distant city by rottingbrains (1.2k)
Sam stares out the windshield again. They’re approaching a city, and she can see the lights in the distance. She’s past the danger zone, and she feels like the world around her reflects that in some way she can’t put into words- as if God is telling her that it’s okay. She did the right thing, and soon she will be past the lonely unknown and into the warm, forgiving light of acceptance. Or something. Come to think of it, the lights only look warm from far away, and she knows that the actual city will seem far less welcoming. Still. Best not to imagine the worst when it’s already going well.
required reading for transfem lesbian sam fans. fics that live in your ribcage to make your heart feel good
Four People Ruby Seduced & One She Actually Fell For (Or: Ruby's Epic Love Affair with Humanity in General and Sam in Specific) by tuesday (3.7k)
In which Ruby has a lot of sex, is not any kind of therapist that would be legal, and helps a few people out for her own reasons. (S4/S5 AU)
for everyone out there who enjoys ruby being a girlboss <3
Fractured Link by Trell (orphan_account) (5.5k)
Meg goes on, resolute despite the way Dean flinches, "He likes me. He likes me a lot, and I like him back, and that's probably good enough for both of us. But fuck me for saying so, Dean-o, he loves you, probably more than anything else on his daddy's green Earth, and you need to man up and give back what Clarence over there has been devoting to you for years."
this is meg/dean/cas which is not smth i really seek out but this was extremely good. set in s7 so it’s meg and dean and honey cas and it’s a lot of dean figuring his shit out and trying to forgive cas and i love meg a lot in this
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some dream team comfort streams
*links to most vods included
1- “heart been broke so many times” era. dream is sad, builds his basement room in the community house, and messes around with george while george just follows. some patches content. very cute.
2- first stream where they use the court on the smp. I remember watching it and being mad, but now it’s just hilarious. sapnap “spitting” on george. amazing.
3- disclaimer: many mentions about drugs. sapnap’s parkour practice stream where dream and sapnap yell at donos and make songs about badboyhalo while badboyhalo is just there being annoyed. gold.
4- mcc 11. (edit: the link I included was of dream’s POV where he’s gone for a while (and still wins- king shit). this is george’s POV)
5- it’s literally george in a suit what’s not to love about it. if anything, watch like the last thirty minutes of the stream. you’ll see why.
6- badboyhalo’s ten hour stream where he does pvp, builds statues of all his friends + among us. bbh slowly loses his mind and dream, george, and sapnap are there too.
7- dream’s shock stream. I remember watching this live and having so many feelings.
the one stream where sapnap and dream were just doing mlg water tricks on the smp while rasputin was playing in the background and dream was dancing while sapnap was giving him diamonds. hilarious, but I can’t find the voddd someone helpp if you can
comfort streams that also include the feral boys
the one where karl, sapnap, and quackity make a cow farm and put on country accents (can’t find it but I need it in my life someone helppp).
the among us stream with proximity chat. you already know. so many good moments in this one.
sapnap’s jackbox stream with face cam. one of the best jackbox streams + watching sapnap try to keep in his laughter makes it so much funnier.
quackity’s who wants to be a millionaire stream. gold. pure gold. sold my soul to watch this one too, but it’s so chaotic it was worth it.
jimmy jacobs stream. dream smp + jackbox (first time playing monster seeking monster). a roller coaster of emotions. where the FUCK is it. this isn’t even a joke anymore someone help me find it please.
#dream team#dtblr#dreamwastaken#georgenotfound love#sapnap#feral boys#quackity#karl jacobs#badboyhalo#dream#I miss them#gibbyslists
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The Azoff Family: A Case Study on one of the Music Industry’s Most Connected Families
(ft. a breakdown of the Grammy voting process and problems)
This is very long so I will try and split it up into categories for everyone (sorry I got carried away- I spent like 2 hours writing this) but enjoy!
*Disclaimer: I want to preface while the majority of this is based in research, some parts may be speculation. I don’t know the family personally so I can’t tell you what goes on behind closed doors but I can tell you how parts of the entertainment/music industry work. I’ve had 5 internships in the industry (one in marketing at one of the big record labels) and the rest of my work is publicity (what I enjoy) and events and a former advisor used to run in the same circles as Irving Azoff (and he spilled some tea last year) I’m not out here to diminish the hard work of any artists or their teams, I’m simply here to showcase parts of the industry that aren’t always shown.*
Please also see: Story Time: How Fan Pages Directly Impact Columbia Records Decisions and Harry Styles Image
IRVING AZOFF: NEVER STOP THE GRIND
Let’s begin with the great business man himself Mr. Irving Azoff Irving Azoff is the literal posture child for connections and power in the music industry (he was also inducted into the 2020 rock and roll hall of fame class which is like a huge fucking deal for a manager to be inducted so you know he's the real deal)
In conclusion, I love Irving Azoff and his drive.
Irving Azoff: Early Years Run Down:
He came up middle class (dad was a pharmacist, mom a bookkeeper) in Danville, Illinois
He dropped out of college to run a small Midwestern concert-booking empire and managed local acts in the era
Opportunity came knocking and he got the chance to manage the Eagles and the rest is history
He's one of the best negotiators and has negotiated business on behalf of stars like Stevie Nicks, the Eagles, and Jimmy Buffet
Azoff has been an incredible manager and his drive to always advocate for his clients while basically not giving two sh*ts about what people think of him has gotten him the incredible reputation he has today.
All of Irving Azoff’s Major Job Positions:
Former President MCA (major label)
Former CEO of Ticketmaster and executive chairman of Live Nation Entertainment, the behemoth formed from Ticketmaster’s merger with Live Nation.
In 2013 he and Cablevision Systems Corp. CEO and New York Knicks owner James Dolan formed a partnership, Azoff MSG Entertainment (Currently still CEO)
----> Azoff also ran the Forum in Inglewood under Azoff MSG Entertainment after MSG purchased it in 2012 (it was sold in 2020 to the owner of the Clippers) — why do you think Harry played the forum for the Fine Line show? Azoff connection
Azoff MSG Entertainment encompasses all of the other companies including Full Stop Management, Global Music Rights (performance-rights org), and the Oak View Group (arena developing company)
He also is the co-founder and manager of the lobbying group Music Artists Coalition, a group that helps lobby for artists-rights issues such as royalty rates, copyright issue and healthcare insurance (see he's not all bad)
Essentially what I'm getting at is this man knows anybody who's anybody. He's the man you want on your team to help promote your music, plan your tour, and get you on that Grammy nom list.
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JEFFREY AZOFF: THE CHILD OF NEPOTISM
So for those of you that don't know, Jeffery Azoff is Harry's current manager and the son of Irving Azoff (the third of four kids). He's currently a partner at Full Stop Management, the company owned by Irving and the one artists such as Harry, Haim, the Eagles, Kings of Leon, and Meghan Trainer are signed to.
Jeffrey graduated from the University of Colorado's Leeds School of Business and started working fresh out of college at his father's old Management company (Frontline Management) working under Maroon 5's manager Jordan Feldstein (the only way you get that kind of internship/job as a 21 year old fresh out of college is if your family or family friends gives it to you). He worked here for 5 years.
Direct Quote from Irving Azoff to Jeffrey (really tells you a lot): "Listen carefully, because I’m going to say this one time. You have a phone and you have my last name. If you can’t figure it out, you’re not my son."
After working for his father, Jeffrey moved on to the talent agency CAA (Creative Artist Agency) where he worked for roughly 3 and half years before joining his dad in forming Full Stop Management in 2016.
While he was at CAA, Irving moved over clients like Christina Aguilera and the Eagles to the talent agency to help with tour booking instead of doing it internally through LiveNation (he was CEO).
Even though I'm sure Jeff has had to work somewhat hard to get to where he is (or at least to mess up his dad's work as he doesn't seem like the type to take laziness well), the door into the industry and every job was basically handed to him on a silver platter.
Not to mention if you watch episodes of keeping up with the kardashians (like myself) you can actually see Jeff hanging out with kendall and the rest of the fam at their Palm Springs house (you know you're a nepotism kid if you have an in with the Kardashian crew). Invite me next time Jeffrey!!!
Think of the Azoff's as the mafia family of the music industry, you don't mess with the mafia
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THE GRAMMY AWARDS: STUDENT COUNCIL ELECTIONS ON STEROIDS
Ok so here's where we’re going to get into a bit more of the speculation/grey area. I don't need to tell you that award shows are corrupt (See the Golden Globes Emily in Paris scandal) and the Grammys are not an exception. Think of the Grammys as one big student council/government elections where despite the fact the teachers tell you six times to vote for the best candidate, you're still going to vote for your friends even if they aren't the best.
A simplified break-down of Grammy voting:
1) Recording Academy voting members (artists, producers, musicians- anyone involved first hand with the creation of music; All voting members must have been producers, performers or engineers on six or more tracks of a commercially released album (or 12 or more digital tracks) and record labels will submit nominations in various categories to the grammys (songs need to be released commercially between October 1 of the previous year and September 30th of this year). You can also become a voting member by either winning a grammy or being endorsed by a current voting member (hint hint)
2) Once received, the recording academy with have the academy of trustees and its reviewers organize them and approve any changes to the 30 categories/fields (aka they can add new categories or remove old ones; so no best ukulele album of the year -- this is where things get funky)
There's speculation that during this stage when these special groups of 8-10 people are organizing genres, there's an "unwritten rule" that you need to be careful what album you green light (especially for famous artists) if you don't want them to win) (Rob Kenner said this- he used to be on one of these committees). Famous people tend to get more votes from clueless or lay Academy members that don't know the specialized categories or don't care enough to listen to songs that aren't radio trending.
3) After the nominations occur, Voting members begin their first voting. Members can vote for the four general categories of record of the year, album of the year, song of the year and best new artist and a maximum of 15 categories, all within their areas of expertise. Now the interesting thing is that while these are the guidelines there is literally nothing stopping them from voting in whatever categories they want (i.g. a rapper voting in the opera category despite not listening to opera). Theses ballots are all tallied and the top 20 entries are determined in each category (funky moment #2)
In 12 of the 84 categories those top 20 go to the ballot and it's done; for the rest it’s not like that. 59 categories including the big four go to a "nomination review committees" (identities are protected so they can't get lobbied... sure) who take a look at the top 20 and narrow it down to 7 or 8. (these are the special committees the Weekend talked about when he was snubbed). They're supposed to choose the nominees "based solely on the artistic and technical merits of the eligible recordings" which lets be real if that was the case Watermelon Sugar (along with most of the others in the category) I don't think would have been nomimated as they are very generic pop (none of them are special... sorry to the WM lovers out there).
This committee is basically held to THE HONOR CODE SYSTEM... I mean tell me when the last time the honor code system worked in literally any scenario (literally wtf). Don't take my word for it though the former CEO of the Academy Deborah Dugan (a queen) filed a complaint against the Recording Academy basically claiming that the nomination review process was rigged (she was fired after 5 months on the job).
Quote from Deborah Dugan "Members of the board [of trustees] and the secret committees chose artists with whom they have personal or business relationships... It is not unusual for artists who have relationships with Board members and who ranked at the bottom of the initial 20-artist list to end up receiving nominations."
These review committees can also exploit there power by adding up to two nominees that don't appear on the top 20 list to the final voting ballot (except in the 4 big categories - which watermelon sugar that one wasn't nominated for)
They also have craft committees for like non performance stuff (like album notes, engineering and arranging) that don't even get voted on by the academy voting members
4) After all of that fucked up mess, the grammy's decided is ok, the ballots go back to the voting members for the final vote. Deloitte (an accounting firm) then counts all of them, seals them in envelopes, and delivers them to the Grammy award show.
** The Grammy's just announced this year they're removing the "secret committees" so let's see how things shift in the next couple of years**
So obviously I'm not saying this to discredit Harry's nomination or his win as Fine Line was in the US top 20 albums for the majority of 2020, however, we must acknowledge privilege. Harry has a big name to him and a huge following, and while all of that shouldn't be taken into account, it does. He also has the Azoffs, a very well connected family with friends in lots of places that would be able to put in a good word here and there to get support behind Harry. Harry won best pop solo performance for Watermelon Sugar in a category with Doja Cat, Justin Bieber, Billie Eilish, Taylor Swift, and Dua Lipa. Look at the names there, the songs (ya'll can try and remember them cause I'm too lazy to write it out) and tell me that those top names with all of the music produced didn't get there through some connections.
Do with all this information what you will and if you are interested in learning more about the entertainment industry on your own Endeavor (owners of WME, a big talent agency like CAA) is hosting a free online program called the Excellence Program to help guide the future generation of industry executives. The program is a-synchronous and starts on July 12th. Highly recommend giving it a go if you're interested!!!
Alright ya'll that's it. Feel free to message me with your thoughts!
Extra Sources if you'd like to read:
https://www.vice.com/en/article/pkdndn/how-grammys-voting-actually-works-and-where-the-alleged-corruption-lies
https://www.grammy.com/grammys/awards/voting-process
https://www.latimes.com/entertainment-arts/music/story/2020-11-05/irving-azoff-eagles-manager
https://celebrityaccess.com/caarchive/jeffrey-azoff-exits-caa-to-launch-new-management-company/
https://www.rollingstone.com/pro/features/grammy-awards-secret-committees-945532/
https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/grammy-awards-eliminate-secret-committees-voting-changes-1163887/
#harry styles#irving azoff#jeffrey azoff#Grammys#harry styles imagines#harry styles blurb#music industry#endeavor#wme#WME entertainment#Azoff#Harry#harry styles imagine#harry styles fluff#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n#harry styles x you#harry styles masterlist#harry styles one shot#harry styles angst
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Thanks, @flickeringflame216 !
3 Ships: gah. Hmmm. Eh. The 3 ships currently revolving around in my mind I can’t say, because there are preschool toys here because the characters only exist in my head (and the head of my friend). So. Huh. Basically most canon ships, especially Healthy Married Couples (because there needs to be more of those) but for like, current rabid fangirl ships… I guess currently they are
Peter Parker/MJ (Tom Holland and Zendaya’s portrayal) or Peter Parker/Gwen Stacy for the Andrew Garfield Spider-Man
Elizebeth Bennet/Fitzwilliam Darcy (I always call them Lizzie and Mr. Darcy in my head 🤣)
Donut Lord/Pretzel Lady 😂 Maddie and Tom are Relationship Goals, I love them so much
1st Ever Ship: heh, probably the couples from Barbie Princess and the Pauper- ESPECIALLY 💗Anneliese/Julian💗 but Erika/Dominic too. My first rabid fangirl shipping was definitely Obi-Wan/Satine from the Star Wars the Clone Wars 2008 show. My heart! 💔😭
Last Song: the pic below plus the Bad Michael Jackson cd my brothers had on. Plus Scarborough Fair by Simon and Garfunkle.
….as I am typing this, either my Mom or brother has put on the Whitney Houston Greatest Hits cd 😂
Last Movie: hmmm I think it was The Santa Clause movie but I might be getting it mixed up with the Santa Clauses show my family binged together. Either that or Home Alone, I can’t remember the exact timeline of events, this holiday season was a bit crazy lol Currently Reading: Recently I read the original Nutcracker and the Mouse King by E.T.A. Hoffman (English translation) and it. is. a. TRIP let me tell you. I got lots of ironic enjoyment out of it and found it both highly amusing and more than slightly disturbing but in an entertaining way. The author wrote it with no small amount of satire and doesn’t take it too seriously - and neither should you. It’s a very interesting and unique writing style and I love it. The only other book I can think to compare it to, writing style-wise, is The Princess Bride (book) by William Goldman. I just started reading Ain’t Misbehavin’ by Jennifer Lamont Leo. I got it for Christmas ;-) Oh and Genesis for the Bible
Currently Watching: haha… a mix of stuff. Hermitcraft - Grian and Scar regularly, with many other Hermits pitched in that vary week to week. Plus Mumbo’s not-hermitcraft videos, lol Empires S2 - Jimmy’s episodes and a few of False’s. Sermons - found on youtube/rumble/other by churches I like to keep up with. As far as actual shows go, I have a longer list of Want-to-Watch than Actually-Watching lol. A lot of the shows on my Want-to-Watch have already ended. Bluey and Sonic Prime are the only shows currently airing new episodes (a show that hasn’t ended but is on hiatus that I watch is The Mandalorian).
Currently Consuming: Tea as well! Though my default tea is iced sweet tea (black tea we keep in the fridge. It’s like, 90% of my fluid intake lol). Of course make it with only a half cup of sugar per gallon of tea, because I don’t like it super sweet. I do love a wide variety of teas though…
Currently Craving: Mint chocolate chip ice cream ;-)
Anyone who wants wants to be tagged- consider yourself tagged!
Tag 9 10 People You Want to Know Better!
Tagged by @o-lei-o-lai-o-lord--thanks Lee! Starting a new post because the old one was quite lengthy.
3 ships: Hmm, I'm not much of a shipper. BUT Faramir and Eowyn make me long for romance like not much else can. I ship them :). Meg and Calvin from A Wrinkle in Time are sweet. And...oh goshawk. Maybe Anne and Gilbert from Anne of Green Gables. I liked how they're still very in love in the later books despite lots of sorrow and Life Things Happening.
1st ever ship: . Probably Laura and Manzo from the Little House books?
Last song: Currently listening to an FFH album so it's Open Up the Sky (but my favorite in that album is One of These Days).
Last movie: Little Women (1994). Watched it last week with my sisters!
Currently reading: Just finished listening to A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle and started Out of the Silent Planet by C.S. Lewis. The Space Trilogy was a gift last birthday and it's been sitting on my shelf for almost a year, so I'm very excited to begin. So far it's fun, and reminding me of just How Good a writer Lewis actually is.
Currently watching: No shows, but if I were YouTubing it would be Smarter Every Day videos.
Currently consuming: Tea! Decaf ceylon, very strong--not my usual choice of tea, but it came as a sample with other tea I ordered for Christmas presents and it is Quite Lovely.
Currently craving: sushi! I want to make it again sometime soon.
Tagging @and-learn-to-let-go, @bookdragon1811, @dearlittlefandom-stalker, @fairytale-lights, @heckin-music-dork, @hollers-and-holmes, @imissthembutitwasntadisaster, @lightthewaybackhome, @tzarina-alexandra, and @zelzahdarkcloak. Open tag too for anyone who wants to jump in--tag me so I can see!
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Destiel
It’s my birthday tomorrow, and to celebrate, I’ve compiled a list of my favourite fics! I’ve read a lot of Destiel fics over the past year, but these are the ones that have stuck with me the most. I’ve not put as much detail in as I usually do because otherwise we would be here forever, but I am begging you to read these fics. They’re all amazing.
Kiss You When It’s Dangerous by zoemathemata (@zoemathemata) on AO3. (57,593 words).
It’s adorable. The plot is fabulous. It’s my all time favourite fic. Please, I am begging you, just read it.
Stand By Me by whelvenwings (@whelvenwings) on AO3. (31,252 words).
The first Destiel fic I ever read, and it’s managed to stay with me this whole time.
Angel’s Wild by LimonadeGaby and riseoftefallenone on AO3. (389,271 words).
The pining is unbearable but it’s all worth it in the end. The ultimate slow burn.
The Tea is Decaf by mnwood (@tomhardysteeth) on AO3. (3,673 words).
Cas is adorable. Eileen is adorable. Everyone is adorable.
a turn of the earth by microcomets on AO3. (95,274 words).
Of course I’ll rec the ultimate John Winchester bashing fic. The plot is so amazing and it is written excellently.
the inexhaustible silence of houses by Askance on AO3. (31,820 words).
This was beautifully written, made me cry, and the ending haunts me to this day.
Forget-Me-Not Blues by noangelsinthegarrison (@aaziraphales) on AO3. (68,689 words).
Jesus Christ, I have not read another fic where these two are such blatant idiots. That being said... I love it. Everything about it is amazing.
the cost of a thing by quiettewandering (@wanderingcas) on AO3. (74,198 words).
So cute! All the angst! My all time favourite trope and absolutely the best take on it!
In All Your Borrowed Finery by vanishingact (@vanishingactblog) on AO3. (67,950 words).
Okay this is adorable and you can’t convince me otherwise. Every time I read a fic with Gabriel in, I miss him just a bit more.
Down Like Water by museaway (@museaway) on AO3. (14,512 words).
I reread this occasionally just to feel something. I literally had to check if I misread the tags like 3 times and I cry every. single. time.
Partnered by K_K_TiBal (@thebloggerbloggerfun) on AO3. (28,112 words).
This is so fucking cute. The artwork is gorgeous. And, now I ship Jody and Donna. All round win.
Black Swans by omphalos and Wolfling on AO3. (66,455 words).
Okay so maybe this is more Sabriel than Destiel, but it was written amazingly and the plot was phenomenal!
this is a good thing, dean (prayer is a sign of faith) by cascountsdeansfreckles on AO3. (529 words).
The one time Cas can’t hear his prayers... I had to include a 15x18 fic in here somewhere, and this one set me off.
Purgatory, director’s cut by runsinthefamily on AO3. (23,722 words).
This was beautiful. It felt hypnotic, almost like poetry, and I absolutely cried at the end.
The House on the Ocean Road by coffeeandcas (@coffeeandcas) on AO3. (111,351 words).
This was gorgeous! Dean and Cas as parents was adorable, and Jimmy was such a fucking icon I don’t even know where to start. Also, not the weirdest past Cas ship I’ve ever seen (but it’s up there).
Broadway Musical by Griftings on AO3. (12,453 words).
The King and Queen of the crack fics. I adore the ‘did you fuck the Michael sword’ vibes and the formatting just makes everything so much funnier.
How Many Slams In An Old Screen Door [podfic] by Tenoko1 (@tenoko1) on AO3. (1hr 50mins).
Before we were shoved back into lockdown, I used to listen to podfics on the way to/from school, and this has to be my all time favourite so far. The asexual representation was fantastic, the plot was hilarious, and (as always) it was read beautifully.
When Charlie Met Cas by riseofthefallenone on AO3. (24,666 words).
This has to be thee funniest fic ever written. I don’t make the rules.
Boneless Wings by PallasPerilous (@pallasperilous) on AO3. (4,333 words).
The art is gorgeous (I’d literally just finished watching Pan’s Labyrinth which was terrifying) and it was such a brilliant parody of all the other wing fics out there (not that I don’t love them too!)
Grace by july_19th_club (@july-19th-club) on AO3. (5,164 words).
This was gorgeous and now I really want to see it filmed! It is so much better than the ending we got. I would say the author should work for them, but... frankly, they deserve better.
It Started With a Fanfic Competition by Tenoko1 (@tenoko1) on AO3. (124,487 words).
This was written beautifully. It was so wholesome, not afraid to call the characters out on their usual bullshit, and has genuinely more character development than the entire 15 year long show.
Serendipity by whelvenwings (@whelvenwings) on AO3. (23,891 words).
I absolutely adored every character in this (and thoroughly enjoyed guessing who was going to show up next!) and the plot was fabulous!
The Mute!Cas ‘verse by Princess_Aleera on AO3. (148,656 words).
Oh man. I wasn’t sure at first, but this is now maybe my favourite universe out there. The fluff was unbelievably fluffy, the angst was quality pain, and that’s without mentioning the fact the end had me ugly sobbing. On Christmas Eve.
When Dinosaurs Ruled The Earth by Mishafied on AO3. (68,926 words).
Oh my lord, what about this isn’t amazing? The casting was fabulous, the amount of research was obvious and really paid off, and I mean... Jurassic Park AU! It made me desperate to rewatch the films, too.
The Passion of the Christ (and his angelic ex-boyfriend) by Bzzee (@clarafordahwin) on AO3. (4,972 words).
I am going straight to Hell, and it is because of this fic right here. That being said, this is top quality crack and I’ve sent it to everyone I know just for the trip (two of them had never watched SPN. One asked me if Jesus was actually in it).
You Can Keep Holding On by NorthernSparrow on AO3. (352,388 words).
I won’t spoil it, but one of the best plot twists of all time! The exploration of Dean & Cas’ relationship, the detail put into the lore, the foreshadowing... amazing.
Apres by imogenbynight (@imogenbynight) on AO3. (24,045 words).
This was so adorable - Cas and Dean deserved a holiday in France!
I hope you enjoyed them! I’ve really been struck - especially over quarantine - with appreciation for all the writers out there who are giving us this professional quality content for free. I genuinely don’t know what I’d do without you, which is why I’ve done my best to hunt you down and tag you so you can take my love! There are a hundred other fics that I could have included on here as well, or ones that I’ve read since making this list. Thank you all so much for giving us these wonderful stories!
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