#its not quite dying but its not spreading and as big as it used to be

[missdynamighttt]

okay not an ask but ive been dying to see some filo reader x katsuki 🙏🙏 katsuki would be so mesmerized he would learn to cook every dish there is and ask if it tastes like home UGH MY BABY

i know its NOT an ask but ><

katsuki wasn’t one to ask for help, but for you? he’d do anything.

you had been feeling a little down lately, and he knew that one of the things that always made you feel better was your favorite filipino dish. the only problem? he had no damn clue how to make it.

which is how he found himself pacing in the kitchen, his phone pressed to his ear as it rang.

"hello? sino 'to? (who's this?)" your mom’s voice came through, warm and familiar.

"hey, tita (auntie)," katsuki greeted, a little awkwardly but determined to speak at least a little bit of tagalog. "it's katsuki. i, uh… need your help with something... po."

"oh?" she sounded amused. "what is it, 'nak? (child?)"

he cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his neck. "i wanna cook her favorite dish for her po, but... i dunno how. thought you could, y’know… teach me."

there was a pause, and then—laughter. "ay, ang sweet mo naman! (oh, you're so sweet!)"

he huffed, his cheeks warming. "tch. just help me out po, tita... please?"

your mom giggled but started giving him the instructions, step by step. katsuki listened intently, taking notes like it was the most important mission of his life. when he messed something up, your mom scolded him like he was her own son.

"no, no, not like that! ay nako (oh my gosh), katsuki, don’t burn it!"

"i’m not burning it!" he retorted, quickly adjusting the heat.

by the end of the call, he had the dish almost perfect—maybe not as good as your mom’s, but damn close.

"thank you po, tita," he muttered, a little embarrassed but genuinely grateful.

"of course, anak," she said fondly. "you take care of my baby, okay?"

he smiled softly. "always."

katsuki wasn’t the type to get nervous. he could take down villains, handle the most intense hero work, and push himself past his limits without hesitation.

but right now?

he had set everything up carefully—your favorite dish, cooked to the best of his ability, plated nicely in front of you. he sat across from you, arms crossed, but you could see the way his fingers tapped restlessly against his bicep.

"i know you’ve been feelin’ kinda down lately," he muttered, not quite meeting your eyes. "figured... maybe this would help."

you blinked at him, surprised, before looking down at the plate. your heart swelled. he did all of this for you?

"katsu..." you whispered, touched beyond words.

"just eat it already," he grumbled, trying to sound impatient, but you could see the way his jaw was tight, the slight furrow of his brows. he cared—he really cared.

so you took a bite.

the moment the flavors hit your tongue, a wave of emotions crashed over you. it wasn’t exactly like your mom’s, but it was damn close. the effort, the heart, the love behind it made it even better.

"this is amazing, kats," you said, looking up at him with genuine admiration. "how the hell did you pull this off? did you use a youtube tutorial? google recipes?"

katsuki scoffed, leaning back in his chair with a smug look. "tch. you think i’d trust some half-assed internet recipe?"

you raised an eyebrow. "then how—"

he huffed, looking away, suddenly seeming a little flustered. "called your mom," he muttered, rubbing the back of his neck. "she walked me through it."

your eyes widened. "you called my mom?"

"yeah, yeah, don’t make a big deal out of it," he grumbled, avoiding your gaze. "figured if i was gonna do it, i’d do it right. so i asked the expert."

you stared at him for a moment, your heart swelling with warmth. "katsuki... that’s so—"

"shut up," he cut in quickly, face slightly pink. "just eat, dammit."

but you couldn’t help the grin that spread across your face. he had gone out of his way to talk to your mom, to learn something that would comfort you. it wasn’t just about the food—it was about you.

you took another bite, savoring the taste and the love behind it.

"i love you, y’know that?" you said, smiling at him.

katsuki clicked his tongue, trying to act unaffected, but the way his ears burned gave him away. "yeah, yeah… i love you too. just finish your damn food."

but when you looked down at your plate again, you felt his hand reach for yours under the table, giving it a small, firm squeeze. and that, more than anything, told you exactly how much he cared.

katsuki watched you like a hawk, leaning in just slightly. "does it… y’know… does it taste like home?"

your chest tightened, warmth blooming in your heart.

"it does," you murmured, squeezing his hand back. "it tastes like home because you feel like home, katsuki."

he stiffened for a second, almost not sure how to process your words.

"tch. sappy little shit," he muttered, but you could hear the smile in his voice, feel the way his grip tightened like he never wanted to let go.

"you're my home too, sweets."

‎‧₊˚✧[ it's me, kia ! ]✧˚₊‧ ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ ‎‧₊˚✧[ more of katsuki ! ]✧˚₊‧

[rebeccathenaturalist]

Let's start the week with a bit of good news! A court order has halted the Bureau of Land Management's plan to log old-growth forests. To be honest, it's mind-boggling that we even got to this point, because the justification was "let's cut down trees to prevent wildfires".

So, here's the thing. Logging companies are among the entities promoting the myth that we need to cut down lots of trees in order to prevent wildfires. It's really just an excuse to harvest old trees for timber, and it completely ignores the science behind wildfires and fire mitigation.

For one thing, logging increases the chance of wildfire. Clearcutting takes away the largest chunks of wood (tree trunks) while leaving piles of branches, twigs, and dried conifer needles. These are known as fine fuels, and they are much more likely to catch on fire. Moreover, since all the plants around the trees were bulldozed before the trees were cut, the soil is now bare and less able to hold water. Because the ambient humidity in the clearcut is much lower than in a healthy forest, the debris and the plants that do begin to grow back are much more vulnerable to dying from drought--and catching on fire.

The same goes for salvage logging, when logging companies go into a burned area to take out trees that are not so burned that they can't be used for lumber. Again they leave behind fine fuels which are more likely to cause reburn--a second fire within a few years of the first. (This is to say nothing of the increased chance of landslides as the unprotected soil washes downhill, and the cumulative loss of topsoil that makes it harder for a forest to recover post-clearcut.)

The very last thing you want to do if you want to avoid wildfire is to cut down old growth forests. Because an old growth forest is so dense with living plant growth, the ambient humidity is quite high. The vegetation helps keep the soil damp, too, which protects the forest from drought. All of this protects the forest from wildfire and makes it am important barrier if fire comes through the area.

If you want to prevent wildfire, you don't cut down the big, more fire-resistant trees or the old-growth forests that are less likely to burn. (You also don't rake the forest floor, just sayin'.) Prescribed burns are one of the best antidotes to wildfire; over a century of fire suppression means that the natural fire cycles in western forests haven't been able to regularly clear out built-up biomass, which has contributed to larger, hotter, more frequent wildfires. By using prescribed burns to carefully remove that biomass, we remove the buildup and allow the forest to benefit from an approximation of its natural fire cycles (many plant species rely on fire for seed propagation and other functions.)

Clearcuts also need to be replaced with more sustainable forestry practices like selective cutting which minimizes impacts on the ecosystem. Forests should contain trees of a variety of species and ages, rather than a plantation of one species all the same age, which is more vulnerable to widespread disease and tree mortality. If all the trees are younger, they are also much more likely to burn together as there are no older trees with thicker bark to slow down the spread of fire. In short: the healthier and more biodiverse a forest is, the more fire-resistant it will be.

All of which is to say that this court order is a victory in our fight against increasingly long and destructive wildfire seasons. The claims that we need to cut trees to prevent fires are not built on science (conversely, I am happy to send anyone the bibliography for my wildfire class that I teach for multiple community colleges and other entities.) Timber companies have been eyeing our last old growth and mature forests for decades in order to make a short-term profit, but we stand to benefit for a much longer time by leaving these forests intact and allowing other forests to mature over time as well.

[serifdoesbookarts]

Hello!! I have studied a bit of wood engraving and am currently an assistant with a rare books and graphic art collection. I have done zero woodcutting though, since I jumped straight from softcut and linocut to wood engraving. Definitely not an expert, but I know more than the average person.

Wood engraving and woodcutting are part of the same family of printmaking, but are slightly different. The part of the wood that you carve is different. In woodcutting, you cut on the side of the tree, so basically perpendicular to the grain. In wood engraving, you engrave into the endgrain. It's like if you cut a tree down and made a block, you could see the grains, like the grains are pointing straight up.

You also would use two different types of wood. I can't remember the exact ones off the top of my head as it's been a year or so since I last truly sat down and engraved, but if I'm remembering correctly (and again, I could be misremembering) engraving requires woods like maple, not woods like pine. AKA, engraving uses hard wood, not soft wood like woodcuts. I learned to engrave with small maple blocks that were really high quality.

The way you cut/carve is different too. In engraving, you are literally shaving small bits of the wood away. I sometimes had to vacuum after a long engraving session because I had just tons of tiny shavings all over my desk, chair, and floor. Woodcutting is more similar to linocut and softcut cutting motions. The tools are quite different too. Instead of a U or V shaped tool, engraving tools are pointy, and the handle is round and fits quite nicely in your hand. The ones I used were Japanese. They are a bit hard to sharpen since if youre not perfectly flat when using a stone, it causes the flat of the tool to be rounded and can cause issues. They're very sharp, though, and the only time I ever got hurt was literally my very last engraving on the very last day of class, I poked myself in the thumb and was so mad about it. Not bad, but enough that it hurt, and a bandaid wouldn't stay because it was at the end of my thumb.

Wood engravings are also usually smaller, because it's more intense, more detailed, and way more expensive than woodcutting. There's very few people in the world who still make blocks for engraving, and while they're very skilled, it can get pricey. We had to order ours in a class set and once we ordered, we couldn't get new ones because of price and shipping times. Woodcutting can be done on bigger blocks and is cheaper since you can use softer, more common woods. Wood engraving is easier to do in tandem with letterpress printing, however, as blocks for engraving are type-high (0.918 inches!). I personally have printed my own engravings alongside hand set type on Vandercooks, which allowed for much faster printing since I didn't have to swap everything out and line everything up to print a new layer.

Engraving came later, roughly the 15th century if I've got my dates right, while woodcutting is from China. I've seen dates ranging from the 200s BCE to the 200s CE to the 700s CE, so basically it's really old. Just like printing presses! East and Southeast Asia has had them for centuries before Germany brought them to the rest of the world.

I probably missed some stuff, but that's the basics from someone who at least studied one of the two things you're asking about. If you'd like to see more, there are a bunch of presses and blogs online actively engraving or cutting, and they usually each have a small blurb or a post explaining the differences or basics. If you're looking to collect prints, the Wood Engravers Network is a wonderful resource, and you get basically random prints from very very incredibly skilled engravers if you become a member, plus a newsletter.

Also: Agnes Miller Parker was who I did a research project on for my engraving studies! My favorite is the Siamese cat, I can't remember if it's a reduction print or what it's called but the one with multiple colors.

Can any printmaking folks out there help me understand the difference between woodcut and wood engraving? The prev posts w Agness Miller Parker led me down a hole of trying to wrap my head around what wood engraving was, but I found conflicting info :(

[zynnth]

The Wild Life finale is making me so insane I can't NOT talk about it

(My AU of the Eyes and Ears AU)

I kept thinking about how an ending like Joel's could be tied to the whole Watcher Lore cause of how happy he was at the end and how that's exactly the opposite of what the Watchers would want, since they feed off of the emotions of the players, especially negative ones. But like. That's EXACTLY IT

Wild Life is, well, WILD. It's almost like the Watchers made this game SPECIFICALLY for Joel, someone who thrives in the chaos and is as unpredictable, as WILD as him.

And unsurprisingly, this works very well. Despite the previous games having their own twists and turns, Wild Life turned that up to a hundred. The Watchers wanted to see the chaos, with Joel in the middle of it. They wanted him to once again reach the level of insanity he displayed in several of the previous games, to spread the panic across the server which would generate all the emotions they could feed on.

But it didn't quite work as they intended. And that's because they underestimated him.

At this point to me it's undeniable that Joel had one of the most prominent arcs throughout the series.

It started in Third Life, where he was quite literally a lone wolf, only having a loose alliance with Scar and Grian at the end which was more for convenience rather than his own will. Then in Last Life, he was once again alone most of the time other than some quick team ups with other red names. Later on in Double Life, he had to team up with Etho because he was soulbound to him. Despite being somewhat reluctant at first, they managed to make it work. Then in Limited Life, he had his first taste of a genuine alliance with the Bad Boys, going as far as to want to sacrifice himself just so Jimmy wouldn't go out first. Then in Secret Life he had the Mounders, so far his biggest team in the games. Throughout the entire series he found more and more people he could rely on, an arc which finally had its climax in Wild Life with his (extended) family. He had their backs and they had his.

It was this support that not only protected him from other teams, but helped him outplay the Wildcards thrown at them. In the middle of all the chaos and death, Joel, the one who was known for being reckless, dying to his own mistakes and just being generally chaotic, was the one who remained rational and not only managed to COMPLETELY avoid dying to these lethal Wildcards, he used them to his advantage.

His finale was no tragedy like all the others were. It was a genuine victory, one he savored until his final moments. The Watchers didn't get the insane Joel from the previous games. Instead they got an ecstatic champion who wasn't going to give them any negative emotions to feed on. This victory was HIS and he's proud of it. In this world of chaos, it wasn't the unpredictable Wildcards that defeated him. HE was the Wildcard that the Watchers could never expect. HE was the one who defied all expectations and won the game with his family cheering him on. HE was the one who wasn't going to give in to what the Watchers wanted.

And it was HIM who managed to win with a big smile on his face at the end of it all.

[hiddendreamsstuff]

Jenny's Poolside Resus

*for @cprdefibloverr

You’re in the kitchen getting a bottle of wine for us, well a second one to be exact. It’s very warm out and I’ve drank quite a bit already. I decided to go jump in the pool to cool off and walk over the other diving board. As I’m standing at the end of the board about to walk forward to jump in, I start to feel dizzy. 

The world starts to spin and I try to steady myself against my own knees but this makes it more difficult to stand on the narrow board. I try to turn around to get off of it, but before I know it I’m losing my footing and falling into the pool. On my way down my head hits the diving board and I’m unconscious before I even hit the water….

My body sinks with gravity into the water, a big splash behind me. My lungs exhale the last of the air in them and large bubbles rise to the surface of the water. I keep sinking and the water fills up my lungs and stomach. Finally when there is no more air I begin to float upwards and end up face down in the pool, my long brown hair spread out around me. 

You come out, wine bottle in hand and look around for me. It takes a moment before your eyes land on my floating body at the deep end of the pool. “Jenny? JENNY!” You scream as you drop the bottle on the grass and dive into the water. 

You grab me and pull me away from the diving board and flip me over. Its a struggle to swim me to the other end of the pool. My lips are a light blue already and I have a contusion on my head from the diving board. 

You finally manage to drag me to the stairs at the other end of the pool and lift me onto dry land. You place me down gently on the grass and  press your ear against my chest, hoping to hear the sound of my heart or the movement of my breath- but you hear nothing. 

You push on my bloated stomach to try and get the water out and it spills out of my mouth in small and then larger amounts. But I do not breathe. You check my pulse on my neck and find nothing. Then you violently rip off my pink bikini top and place your hands between my large c cup breasts; your middle finger grazing my right nipple. You press down hard- so hard- over and over and over again directly on my sternum. My breasts move with each compression, jiggling and wobbling, my nipples quickly becoming hard and erect with exposure to the air. 

You lean down close to my face t breathe into me: your lips sealed around mine with my head tilted upward, my chest rises and falls dramatically. Each breath sends a huff out of my mouth back into yours. You place your fingers on my neck hoping for some change, but you feel nothing. 

“Come on Jenny, stay with me baby! Stay with me!” you scream as you move back to pumping my chest. “Damnit, Jenny, wake the fuck up!” but my eyes remain closed and my chest remains still other than the movements you put into it. 

It occurs to you to call 911, but your phone is in the kitchen and you dont want to leave me here, dying in the sun. Luckily our neighbor hears you through the window screaming and sees you doing compressions and calls. It will take her a few minutes to come over, but she initiates the call without you knowing. 

…..

Behind my closed eyes, my mind is barely able to make sense of what is happening. My heart is beating only because two hands are pushing down and small amounts of oxygen get to my brain. “Save me baby, please save me. I don’t want to die”. Goes through my head, one word with each compression because my brain cant think in between them. When air comes in my lungs, my brain shuts down completely because there is no blood flowing through it. I am scared… so fucking scared.

….

You continue your well intentioned assault on me as you crush my chest and breathe for me. You beg me to wake up, but my heart is in total flatline. Suddenly you hear someone at the fence screaming your name. You barely look up but you catch a glimpse of our neighbor, Jane, as she jumps the fence in shorts and a tank top. 

“I heard you through the window and saw you doing compressions and I called 911. I’m here to help” she says breathlessly. “Let me take over compressions, you’re going to get tired” You look at her, with deep fear in your eyes. She places her hands on yours and you move yours out from under them. You lean down and breathe for me once more. 

… 

Jane’s hands are softer, but do equally hard compressions. I sense that there has been a change as fingers now graze my other breast, but otherwise have no idea what is going on. I just feel a sense of slipping away. “Come on, bring me back, don’t give up on me” drifts through my brain in broken phrases as blood is pumped through it.

….

Sirens in the distance bring both ease and renewed fear. They break the trance you are in as you and Jane switch off every other set of compressions and breathe for me. 

“What if they can’t bring me back?” 

“What if they say I am too far gone already?”

EMTs hop the fence and bring out the AED immediately and start the process of intubating me. You continue doing compressions and Jane watches from above providing them with a description of what she saw when she called. 

They shove a laryngoscope down my throat and then a tube follow it. I make gurgling sounds as they put the tube in and then attach an ambu bag to it. The other attaches leads to my chest and put the AED pads above my right breast and below my left on the side. The monitor reads a flatline so they set up an IV as well and inject epi and other drugs straight into me. I feel them being pumped up my arm from the pressure of your compressions. 

“Baby, you gotta come back to me” you grunt as you continue compressions. An EMT tries to take over, but you will not let them. 

Suddenly there is a squiggle on the screen and the EMT tells you to stop compressions so she can shock me. “Shocking at 250! Clear!” You reluctantly stop and lean backwards and watch as a jolt of electricity go across my chest causing my back to arch and my breasts to reach up to the sky. I slam back down and my breasts shake, but in a different way than with the compressions. 

“Shocking again at 300! Stand clear! Shocking!” Another bolt goes across and lifts my right shoulder and then my left side. I slam back down and the other EMT gives me breaths through the bag. 

“No change. Continuing compressions!” The EMT takes over compression and you watch as they work to save me. It’s killing you to watch me in this lifeless state right now. 

“Damn it Jenny, just breathe already!” you say as you pace back and forth. 

….

The shocks across my chest are painful and jarring. Death is supposed to be peaceful isnt it? I desperately want to come back but I feel I am losing control of that choice as each compression squeezes my heart between my breast bone and the ground. I worry that I am already dead and gone, but just stuck here. 

…..

“She is still flatline” the EMT who has been bagging me says after three more minutes of CPR. “Im giving her more epi” and drop the bag to work around the EMT giving compressions. 

“Continue CPR and then we will do another pulse check in one minute!” 

You continue to pace and Jane attempts to comfort you with no luck. I know you, you don’t like to be touched or comforted when you’re stressed. You kneel down next to me and place your hand on my thigh. “Please…. please Jen…”

At that moment my heart starts to fibrillate on the monitor. “Shocking at 360! Clear!…. again! Clear!” both shocks send my back arching even higher off the ground and cause me to land with an even greater impact than before. 

After I land my heart starts to beat again and I start to choke on the tube. “Baby!” you scream as they start to use a stethoscope on my chest and pull the tube out of my throat. 

…

My whole body is sore and feels like someone has broken my entire rib cage. I learn later its really just bruised deeply from the compressions, but I feel horrible. The pain is intense, but I feel your hand on my face after the tube is pulled out caressing my cheek and begging me to never do that again. 

[asnowperson]

Tanbi to Heroine - Literary classics adapted into shoujo manga

I want to talk about the book of my dreams: Mangaka! Sekai Bungaku - Tanbi to Heroine (マンガ化! 世界文学 耽美とヒロイン). It's a compilation of shoujo manga from the 1970s and 1980s which are adaptations of classics from world literature. Each manga has a little introduction about its artist, and the work it was adapted from. Thank you, our Tosho no Ie overlords.

It came out in 2022, and I'm so happy to own this book. After watching Aoi Bungaku and falling in love with what they did with Kokoro there, I've always wanted to see more anime/manga adaptations of literature. Seeing how authors/directors give the works their own interpretations while still staying faithful to the original work, and not trying to do a 1:1 adaptation can be great, as long as they don't jump the shark. Speaking of which, I even liked Gankutsuou despite the bizarre 3D space mecha fights because Edmond Dantès was still there. I can't get mad at it when the director gets the core of the work right.

Anyway, I want to present this awesome book and the manga collected in this volume!

Hagio Moto – Shiroi Tori ni Natta Shoujo (白い鳥になった少女)

Adapted from Andersen's The Girl Who Trod on A Loaf, and first published in Bessatsu Shoujo Comic 1972/12.

Hagio tells the story from the point of view of the girl who becomes a bird at the end of the tale, which is a very nice touch.

2. Mizuno Hideko – Cendrillon (サンドリヨン)

Adapted from Grimm Brothers' Cinderella, and first published in LaLa 1977/9 & 11.

With Mizuno's exquisite art, this Cinderella adaptation is the perfect fairy tale. On the first and last pages Hideko-tan breaks the fourth wall to give us information about the original work, and going "bruh, these are supposed to be tales for kids but some brutal stuff goes on in them. What's with all the mutilations and eye-gouging?!" It's adorable!

3. Maki Miyako – Hanakagerou (花陽炎)

Adapted from Murasaki Shikibu's The Tale of Genji, and first published in Big Comic for Lady 1987/2.

This excerpt is taken from vol. 2 of Maki's Genji Monogatari adaptation, and depicts a scene that doesn't exist in the original work: Hikaru meeting Lady Fujitsubo for the first time. I must say that all that Genji Monogatari Japanese went over my head ;_;

4. Miuchi Suzue – Takekurabe (たけくらべ)

Adapted From Higuchi Ichiyou's Takekurabe, and first published in Hana to Yume 1977/1 & 2. This story is actually part of Miuchi's Glass Mask. In the manga, it was acted in the third act, “Kaze no Naka wo Iku.” Compiled in vol.s 3-4 Hana to Yume comics version, vol.s 2-3 of Hakusensha Bunko, and vol.s 3-4 of the digital ebook.

Conveying the subtleties of the character through the way Ayumi and Maya acts is quite ingenious. We get adaptation-ception with this one, and I loved it. It really made me want to read the book to get to know Midori better.

5. Sakata Keiko – Okisaki to Nemuri Hime (お妃と眠り姫)

Adapted from Charles Perrault's Sleeping Beauty, and first published in Comic Tom 1989/1.

I haven't read Sakata's works, but she always strikes me as being the odd one in the shoujo scene. And this manga just strengthened my conviction. Her adaptation of Sleeping Beauty focuses on the ogre mother of the Prince, and her loneliness. Which is another ingenious way of going about adapting a fairy tale from a completely point of view. Her funny-looking art and humor adds to it.

6. Fumizuki Kyouko – Shiroki Mori no Chi ni (白き森の地に)

You get this color image I found online, because scanning this gorgeous double spread was impossible. And it's in grayscale in the book.

Adapted from Louis Hémon's Maria Chapdelaine, and first published in Bessatsu Shoujo Friend 1977/3.

I had no idea about this story, but wow, Hémon sure lived a life... This story that takes place in Canada feels really comforting. I'm surprised this didn't get an anime adaptation. Sure, it's not long enough for one, but it'd make a perfect comfort shoujo. "Comfort shoujo" as in people dying and the protagonist growing up after being hit by misery and having to make life-altering choices. I can see why this was popular in Japan.

7. Yamagishi Ryouko – Rapunzel Rapunzel (ラプンツェル・ラプンツェル)

Feast your eyes on this color Rapunzel illustration from the Yamagishi artbook I have.

Adapted from Grimm Brothers's Rapunzel, and first published in Bessatsu Shoujo Friend 1974/6.

Queen Yamagishi does not disappoint: We go full psychological and read about how parents ruin childrens' lives by projecting their shortcomings in life onto them, and their twisted sense of "love" can be worse than a sorceress's curse. Prince charming therapy time, baby!

8. Sato Shio – Bijo to Yajuu (美女と野獣)

Adapted from Madame de Beumont's Beauty and the Beast, and first published in Papermoon Shoujo Manga Fantasy Shoujo Manga – 1001 Nights (5.11.1980).

This short yet poignant adaptation really brings out the love in the story. She distilled the tale, and left what touches your heart the most in these 8 pages.

This work was also originally published in full color, and it's so gorgeous that I bought the book it was first published in. I hope to have it within the month.

So yeah, if you need to gift something to your old-shoujo loving friend, you now know what to get :)

[lovebugism]

If you’re taking requests could I ask for one from the fall prompts with Steve and punchy?

“When she wears YOUR flannel shirt”

ty for requesting! steve x punchy nation rise! — you spend an autumn morning with steve which results in misplaced jealousy and spilled coffee (established relationship, fluff, v v brief miscommunication, 1k)

fictober (㇏(•̀ᵥᵥ•́)ノ)

Steve, still wearing last night’s pajamas, stands barefoot on the patio and basks in the early morning orange. 

Fall seemed to arrive in Hawkins overnight. It’s cooler than usual outside, and everything is weirdly more yellow. Every tree has seemingly shed its leaves, too, and somehow ended up right in his pool. He uses the net to fish the dying things from the rippling blue.

You watch him from the doorway. His golden arms tense with every scoop, and his sleep shirt is so tight you can see the muscles in his back flexing, too. Your bare legs are cold and prickly with it, but the sight of him makes you feel all warm — like the mug of hot coffee burning your palm.

“You have to stop being so productive so early in the morning,” you chastise, voice still heavy with sleep. “It’s getting weird.”

“It’s gotta get done, babe,” Steve retorts with a soft laugh, his back still facing you.

You take it as an opportunity to press yourself against him. You wrap your free hand around his waist and spread your palm along the faint pudge of his covered tummy. Your cheek melts between his shoulder blades as you mumble, “Not while normal people are still sleeping. Think about it— we could be spooning right now and not freezing our asses off—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Steve interjects with a boyish vibrato. Still gripping the metal handle of the pool skimmer, he turns around to face you. His honey eyes are wide as they dart up and down your form. “No way you’re wearing Eddie’s shirt right now.”

Your brows pinch together just like his bushy ones. You look down at yourself, at the deep green and navy blue flannel swallowing you whole, then back at him. “No?” you answer, though it comes out as more of a question. “This is your shirt.”

Steve shakes his head, puts a hand on his hip, and clicks his lips against his teeth. 

“No… I’m pretty sure I saw him wearing it the other day— he said he was gonna cut the sleeves off and wear it over his jacket like a freak.”

“And I told him he couldn’t, remember?” you lilt with raised brows. “‘Cause he stole it from me after I stole it from you.”

Steve winces when you shove your pointer finger into his chest.

“So, it’s mine?” he questions, confused all over again.

You nod all slow. “Yeah.”

“Oh…” he hums, less jealous and more content than he was a moment ago. 

His chest starts to warm now that he can see you more clearly, without the haze of misplaced envy clouding his vision. 

Your hair’s a mess, and you’re still in yesterday’s makeup, and your legs are unshaven. The buttons on the flannel don’t quite line up, either, and the lapel droops off one shoulder to reveal the lovebite he left on your collarbone the night before.

If home was a place, he’s pretty sure it’d look an awful lot like you.

“…Oh,” he repeats, with a more profound inflection this time. ‘Cause he’s a boy, and you’re wearing his shirt, and it’s doing irreversible damage to his brain.

“I just got, like, ten times hotter, huh?” you tease with a knowing squint.

“Try a thousand,” Steve scoffs with a pink grin.

“A million?”

“A billion,” he argues, wrapping his free arm around your shoulders to pull you into him again. His other stays firmly gripping the pool net because he’s not diving in to rescue this thing if it sinks. “A kajillion, even,” he jokes with sparkling eyes that dance between both of yours.

You laugh before you mean to. “Wow. That’s a real big number, Harrington. Sure you know what it means?”

“If it means I wanna kiss the life outta you, then, yeah,” he murmurs lowly, already leaning in to kiss your smile.

You taste like coffee, where he tastes like minty mouthwash. It’s an unearthly concoction that feels like heaven on your tongue. 

It’s perhaps too early to be kissed so ardently, with your head tilted back against the crook of Steve’s elbow while he steals the breath from your lungs. You get so effortlessly drunk on him — quickly forgetting the crisp cold and the fresh coffee in your hand.

Steve hisses when he pulls back from you, features contorted in discomfort. “Hot coffee,” he winces through gritted teeth. “Hot coffee on my foot.”

Only then do you recognize your limp hand and the subtle splashing of your drink against the patio.

“Oh, shit!” you blurt into the quiet, early morning. “Fuck, Steve— I’m sorry!”

He shakes his head and swipes a hand through his hair. He scrunches his nose and tries to smile. “It’s okay. Didn’t even hurt.”

Your eyes flit down to his splotchy red foot, then back at him. You look more pained by it than he does. “Yes, it did!” you agonize, wrapping your arms around his waist and smushing your cheek into his chest. 

Thankfully, there’s not much coffee left in the mug to spill this time. 

“I’m sorry, Stevie,” you mumble into his t-shirt. “Fuck, I wish I wasn’t so clumsy all the time— it’s annoying.”

Steve laughs into your hair and abandons the pool skimmer to wrap both arms around you. One hand squeezes your shoulder while the other smooths up and down your back. “I don’t think so. I think it’s sweet.”

“…Even when I give you third-degree burns from my coffee?”

He exhales a faint chuckle. “Yeah, even when you give me third-degree burns from your coffee.”

Your cheek rubs against the soft cotton of his t-shirt when you turn to look up at him. Your chin tilts against his chest and bobs as you ask him, “Do you still wanna kiss me?”

A crooked smile tugs slow at his pink mouth. His honey eyes twinkle when they look down at you. He quickly forgets the tingling pain fading at the top of his foot because you’re so damn pretty wrapped up in his arms.

“I’d kiss you forever, baby,” he murmurs so fondly it makes your stomach whirl. “You know that.”

[hahahafangirl]

a Revelation i just had from talking with my roommate is that wind breaker is uniquely a story about cultivating, developing, and protecting your *local* community, i.e. in a small town. this may be a response to a cultural climate that is increasingly remote and globalized, where the people around you, especially in a big city, becomes more and more anonymous (the bread sellers, the flowershop owners, the neighbors living next to you, etc— that we see the characters interact with).

specifically, in the shounen sphere, while community, friendships, teamworks are strongly emphasized, they are typically a secondary theme. friendships and empathy are vital to one piece, but its primary motivation and focus are on freedom and adventures. haikyuu, too, and all sports mangas that i have seen, is hinges on teamwork and connection, but the dominant context/motivation is the passion for sports and dedication/conviction towards your dreams. actually, haikyuu quite uniquely insists on teamworks and connections in ways i didnt see (as convincingly, at least) in other sports mangas. nonetheless, the primary focus is not on developing a community that you live in. so on and so forth. here is the difference: while all shounen works necessarily emphasized friendships, interpersonal connections, co-existence and teamworks, most of the time the community is something that the goal necessitates rather than being the goal itself. it’s a tool, not an endgoal.

that is not to say, i emphasize, that these stories are not good. it’s just that the premise of wind breaker is unique in the current narrative climates in a way that is quite reactive, actually, to the cultural climate today.

because the people around us are getting increasingly anonymous. in a big city you are not expected to know who your neighbors are. you are not expected to have meaningful conversations with the flowershop owners, the baristas that make you drinks every tuesday, or, hell, anyone that “serves” you. especially as the cities get larger and you never quite see the same people with any reliable frequency (yet another way in which the current economy (ehem, capitalism) configured our communities and interpersonal connections). this is a problem humanity never have before, in such unprecedented scale— but alack, social changes happen all the time, and most of them are unprecedented.

thats why the premise of a dying town — one that is explicitly ignored by law enforcement, quite literally left behind — is also symbolic of the smaller, more concentrated, and more personal social structure we are abandoning. the smallness is why bofurin knows everyone in town. the constancy is why bofurin and makochi care for one another. the premise basically necessitates the story to occur in this small, abandoned, relic of a town. and bofurin and the friends they made in other teams (that is, other local communities) is what revive these spaces that are on the decline. also, this intentionality of care from the youth (umemiya!!!) is what rescues the town from complete abandon to the cozy, lively place it is. literally, it started with one person, one smaller community— that spreads to the whole town. the smallness and mundanity is the point— things that our socio-economic focus on rapid “growth” and “development” is glossing over, the way makochi was.

do i have a solution for what i am portraying as a societal decay? no. do i expect every place in the world become makochi? would be nice, but probably not. but the narratives do invites and encourages me to notice more of the people i see day to day. maybe this will gets a lot harder once i move out of my undergrad dorms and no longer sees the same baristas, cafeteria workers, custodians, facilities workers that i know by name. but i sure hope i will know the names of the people i live with, in a community, in a new city.

anyway, wind breaker is very refreshing and yet another example of how culture and arts response to and interact with each other 😌 i can only hope that, regardless of whether people read so deeply into this or not, the narratives encourages them to be kinder and more noticing of their community. maybe nurture it too, like ume does and is inspiring everyone in bofurin to be :)

[phoenotopia]

Introducing Star Iliad!

We’re happy to announce our next game, “Star Iliad”! Now in development.

Star Iliad is a retro-futuristically themed Metroidvania that takes place inside a giant star whale.

See the teaser trailer!

In the game, you’ll play as Blythe Braves, a Star Ranger who patrols a remote region of the interstellar frontier. Heeding a distress signal, she investigates to find a curious large rock formation in the shape of a whale. Shortly after landing and locating a couple of castaways, her ship is destroyed by unknown alien creatures. Stranded and surrounded, but not outgunned, she joins forces with other castaways in a bid to escape. A big adventure ensues!

Where Phoenotopia had more Zelda-style leanings, Star Iliad dives deeper into Metroid territory with a larger, interconnected map and a stronger focus on gun combat. We’ve learned the correct lessons from Phoenotopia— which is… Guns are Good 👍 Bats are Bad 👎 (joking!)

The story won’t be taking a backseat. While Phoenotopia featured a large ensemble cast, Star Iliad narrows its focus to a smaller group of more thoroughly explored characters.

(Characters can leverage expressive portraits to drive emotionally charged scenes)

Some additional in-development pics. We have both very finished & very unfinished looking areas.

Legacy of Phoenotopia

Since Phoenotopia’s development concluded, we’ve received some really encouraging emails from fans expressing how much they enjoyed it and even sharing their concern about whether we were doing alright. This meant a lot, especially considering Phoenotopia was not a strong seller.

For a while now, I’ve felt the need to allay those fears and let everyone know that we’re alive and hard at work on something new. With Steam’s fourth anniversary for Phoenotopia approaching, it felt like the right moment to finally share an update.

True, Phoenotopia was not a strong seller, but it would not turn out to be as bleak as I previously believed. Long after sales should have dwindled to zero, the game found a small, but steady threshold—a lifeline that has kept us funded. We’ve also been able to rely on family (and the occasional side job or two) to stay afloat.

Lastly, I think the game got some organic word of mouth, so there would be random times here and there where a youtuber or renowned streamer covered Phoenotopia and we’d get an unusual sales spike out of nowhere.

So, to all the fans who supported us, whether by buying the game, spreading the word, or just sending us kind messages—thank you! You’ve sustained us in ways you may not even realize, and we’re incredibly grateful 🙇

Chronicling Star Iliad’s development with a new Dev Log! (on wordpress)

After Phoenotopia, there was a bit of wandering around and thinking about what was next.

I wanted to settle into a quieter pace of development for a while. With Phoenotopia, I had been doing long form dev log updates. I wanted to try something different – a smaller, but more frequent form of dev logging. And it appeared that the new dev blogging meta was social media like Twitter & Instagram.

But there was no point in starting right away. Because 4 years back, we didn’t know what we were working on. It would take about a year of exploring & feeling around before “Star Iliad” developed enough shape and form that it could be talked about. Then we started twitter (@StarIliad) and instagram (@StarIliad), and started posting. Not as regular as I thought I would it turns out – short form updates have their own unique challenges and dev logging is always easy to neglect.

Still, if you’re curious, you can look at the StarIliad twitter account and enjoy the past 3 years of short form dev log posts (it may keep you entertained for all of 10 minutes).

As for the instagram account, it never quite took off, basically dying right out the gate >_>

In any case, we’re in the midst of development. It’s difficult to see the finish line from here, so I can’t announce a release date. What I can announce is the return of the dev log, where like times of yore, I will be chronicling our thoughts and tribulations until we reach the finish line. I invite you to join us by subscribing to the new dev log on wordpress.

(Also, please wishlist on Steam! It helps with the algorithm)

[thragglikesrockzthragglikesblog]

You should ask igg about the mountain cave night thragg is telling you to go to(unless you already have), maybe she has information about it?

this was good idea.

Thragg talk to Igg and she have a lot to say.

she say that Cave on mountain top is old temple. worshipping place for ancients.

ancients go there to worship Old Gods. Thragg mention them before but Thragg will give a retell.

There is

Jaws Below

Night Eyes

Raining Fire

Dark Mother and

False Sky

she say there may be more but those the big ones. she say that Old Gods like to have people who worship and give stuff for. gods act threw them. Like Agar! Agar is chosen by Dark Mother to do certain things and get things back.

First is Jaws Below

Jaws Below is oldest one. it SUPER old. spend most of its time sleeping and waiting for peeple to come down into the dark below. he always hungry. always waiting and needing. watching us from deep dark below. Agar say he want to eat the whole world one day. then move on to next world.

then is Eyes in Night

Eyes in Night is monster! she live within all creatutes that hunt, bite, kill and eat others. she scary strong and dangerous. Igg say she the feeling you get when you in woods and you feel like something watching you. that her. always her. Igg say she younger. more viscious and angry than others. she alive within the never ending hunt.

Raining Fire!

Raining Fire is great and powerful but he only show up sometimes! he live in fire and smoking mountains. he bring down burning stones from the sky and set fields and forests on fire! he have careful balance with dark mother. burning so she can remake. if you ever see mountain explode! field burning! waves crashing! and stone fire rain from sky! that him. he strong but distant. rare to see.

then there is Dark Mother.

Dark mother almost as old as Jaws but not quite. she make the plants and animals in valley grow tall but she also make things die and rot. she make sure that nothing stay exactly the same, seasons, rotting, dying, growing. she make sure the land in check. occasionally she ask Raining Fire to help her. sometimes things need to be destroyed reall bad so they can get better. she hard to understand. lots of rules and things to not do. but she not hurt you so long as you never break rules. she live in big forest near Agar and Igg. Agar is chosen one but soon Igg will be chosen as well. once Igg ready for it.

last is False Sky.

newest and meanest. Igg say he from far away. i ask if he from place like Orfni but she say he from even farther. say he is intruder. interloper. not suposed to be here. hundreds of summers ago he arrive and try to destroy everything in and around valley. he spread death and killing dust across lands. drive out everything except the big lizards and other monsters.

it take a long time but Dark Mother recover and fight back in big clash! Gods fighting gods! Raining Fire side with Dark Mother and Jaws Below side with False Sky! they attack and smash each other over seasons! but Dark Mother overpower False Sky. Wound him horribly and send him back into the air! Dark Mother win for now. but who know how long False Sky stay up there.

land outside of Valley still not healed. that why valley so hard to get to and hard to leave.

[szfiction]

@danielitsmebitch replied: Tsukasa always has to pick like the little bones in Senku’s fishes because he can’t do it correctly :p

[Read on AO3]

“For a scientist, you don’t always have the sharpest eyes, do you, Senku?” Tsukasa teases, the amusement on his face enough to have Senku rolling his eyes.

“I’m not some species of bird that can change the shape of its cornea for improved vision,” Senku sneers. “And sorry, Tsukasa, but I never claimed to be an expert in culinary science.”

Tsukasa hums, nodding in a placating way that likely comes across as patronizing. “Is that so? I didn’t know that you considered a job so menial to be a ‘science’.”

Senku grumbles something incomprehensible, resting a hand on his cheek and watching Tsukasa with an irritated expression. Tsukasa chuckles, and it’s surprisingly soft, still feeling foreign coming from his own mouth; at least in such a genuine manner.

This ‘job’ that Tsukasa has undertaken is simple enough: picking out the tiny fishbones of their catches of the day before they are set up to cook in their wood fire oven. With Francois revived as the go-to chef, it is not common that they have to cook alone, but with the growing size of the combined Kingdom of Science and Empire of Might, and the groups spread between their various camps, they are not always available. Thus, someone else has to undertake the responsibility—for Senku’s sake.

“Have your friends from Ishigami village never thought to teach you this?” Tsukasa asks, yanking out another bone between his fingertips. “Surely they’ve had plenty of experience, coming from a community located on an island.”

Senku shrugs. “Not like it’s a big deal. Swallowing fishbones is generally harmless. The gastric acid secreted by the stomach dissolves them within a week. And any steps I can skip in this type of prep work, I skip.”

“Right,” Tsukasa says. “And it’s still harmless when you choke on it?”

“…those incidents are outliers,” Senku mutters.

“Then I must have inconvenient timing, catching it twice now,” Tsukasa points out. It had been quite the scare the previous day, when Senku fell into a coughing fit in the middle of dinner, bending forward and face going a little red. Tsukasa had jumped in quickly, giving him hard pats on the back to assist, and soon, the bone was dislodged from Senku’s throat—much to his embarrassment, considering the little scene he’d caused.

“Twice?” Senku asks, brows furrowing.

“Mhm,” Tsukasa hums. “Twice.”

It takes a moment before comprehension lights up Senku’s expression, and a tiny smirk crosses his lips. “Ah. Right. Back when it was just you, me, and Taiju.”

“Taiju was worried you were dying on us,” Tsukasa recounts.

“Yeah, he was way too dramatic about it. And then he almost choked,” Senku muses. He huffs amusedly. “You had to make sure to pick the bones out for both of us after that. Looks like you’re right back where you started, huh?”

Such an idea settles pleasantly in Tsukasa’s mind. “It looks that way.”

“Kinda delicate work for the ‘Strongest Primate High Schooler’, though,” Senku teases. “And most people use tweezers, so it’s pretty impressive you’re doing it with only your oversized fingers.”

“I had lots of practice growing up.”

“For you and Mirai?”

Tsukasa nods. “Before she was hospitalized, I always cooked for the both of us, and I never wanted to risk her choking.”

“You’re a natural caretaker, huh?”

“I’m not too sure about that,” Tsukasa says. “It’s natural to share the skills and knowledge you have. Back when I was with my own group, I guided several of those recently revived through the steps to properly clean, cut, and fillet their fish before cooking as well.”

“You’re proving my point,” Senku says, amused.

Tsukasa shrugs. “I simply contribute how I can. Though, I still find it difficult to believe there aren’t others who would do this for you, Senku.”

“There might be. But you’re the one who offered, so it’d be illogical to ask someone else now.”

“Is that your way of telling me I’m stuck with you?”

“If that’s how you wanna play it,” Senku answers, the smirk on his lips and his playful tone dwelling into territory that sets off alarms in Tsukasa’s mind.

“Careful, Senku,” Tsukasa warns. “If you give me permission, I might push my caretaking privileges further.”

Senku snickers. “Oh yeah, like how? Tucking me in at night and telling me a bedtime story?”

“If you’d prefer to be treated in such a childish way…”

Senku shoves his shoulder. “Shut up, no way in hell.”

Tsukasa laughs, fondness curling in his belly as he wipes his hands clean with a cloth, the fish in front of him now perfectly safe for consumption. He rests a hand on his cheek, turning to stare openly at Senku, who meets his gaze with a curious glint in his eyes.

“Truthfully, I don’t have anything in mind,” Tsukasa admits. “But I don’t mind playing the role of protector when it’s for your sake.”

Senku scoffs, shaking his head and fiddling with the papers in front of him. “Well, you already signed up for fighting duties when you joined the Kingdom of Science, big guy, so I don’t expect you’ll slack off.”

“Of course not,” Tsukasa agrees. “Especially not when it comes to you.”

And perhaps it’s simply the sun beating down on them, or a trick of the light, but Tsukasa swears there is a light dusting of pink adorning Senku’s cheeks.

“Yeah, yeah, quit it with the saccharine words and lovestruck looks,” Senku says. “Don’t you have cooking to do?”

Tsukasa chuckles softly. “I’m on it.”

Senku nods, satisfied, and proceeds to make an excuse for himself, declaring he has something or another to work on in the lab. Tsukasa watches him as he goes, unable to shake his smile all the while, and when Senku sneaks one final glance back at him, it’s hardly his fault that it grows even wider.

Yes, Tsukasa thinks, as he turns back to his own task, feeling oddly hopeful in a way he never could have anticipated even a year prior. Perhaps tedious work suits me after all.

[neildylandy]

finally finished, and this one may be my best custom yet: introducing the HG Gundam Zabanya (Last Stand Ver.)!

this one's been a looooong time coming, and what a fun ride it was!! the top shelf of my first gunpla display case has, naturally, always been reserved for 00 kits (and sometimes their build fighters/divers variants—looking at you, cherudim saga and 00 diver arc), and with the current setup i have in there, i knew that i probably only had room for one more gundam, so that gundam damn well better be a good one.

and oh my god was this a good one. full breakdown under the cut.

the build itself, being a high grade from 2010, wasn't really anything special, but who cares about that, i got to try out WEATHERING for the first time! weathering fucking rules. you take your marker ink and the shittiest, stiffest paintbrush you own and you just absolutely go to town. how could i not love that. brilliant exercise, gorgeous final product, this will definitely not be the last time i do this to a kit.

the gold, silver, gunmetal, metallic red, bright metallic green, and some of the white was also handpainted, and the crystal over the forehead sensor was sharpie-dyed with navy blue. this kit comes with a ton of stickers for color accuracy (a common issue with HG 00 kits) but thanks to all this paintwork i ended up barely using any of them.

that snazzy gun comes as a donation from my spare parts box, since i wasn't really a fan of the two rifles that come with the base kit. i honestly have no idea what kit it's originally from (EDIT: i have now been informed that it was MG kyrios's submachine gun), but it was basically one solid hunk of grey plastic with a single green sticker on it before i jazzed it up with all the gunmetal and the weathering.

this kit also served as a trial run for my new DSPIAE gunmetal brush pen, and i'm very pleased with how it looks and how it felt to use! if other DSPIAE markers are as good as this one, consider me sold. prone to scratching, though, so definitely a marker better served for accent pieces or parts you're not expecting to handle very much.

the cloak was just some cheap amazon purchase, i think. smelled awful for whatever reason. works great, though, especially once i roughed it up a bit with scissors. there's a little wire in the collar that keeps it scrunched shut around the head.

the ELS crystallization was done with the same trick i used on my ELS Brave: cut up a couple (in this case, two) spare beam saber blades into a variety of pointy shapes, glue 'em on, paint 'em silver.

i think the lore i was going for with this custom design was that this was from a version of A Wakening of the Trailblazer where the fight(s) with the ELS went on for much longer, thus prompting a more last-ditch, ragged appearance from zabanya (hence the name Last Stand). i'm sure setsuna will take care of things before those ELS crystals spread too much further, though...!

and, finally, since that big cloak and all those ELS crystals do cover up quite a bit, here's some photos i took of just the kit by itself in all its weathered glory.

with this, my MG dynames, and the cherudim saga type.y2k, i've finally built (a version of) all three lockon stratos gundams. here's hoping they make something new and fun for lyle to fly in 2027 (and then a tiny plastic version for me to put in my house!)

[sprintingowl]

Changed Stars

More TTRPG reviews!

DieselShot sent me a copy of their big full-featured scifi TTRPG Changed Stars, and it was both polished and modern and a trip down memory lane to the mechanically robust heartbreakers of the 90s and early 00s.

I'll put the full review below, but if you like stuff like Farscape and Mass Effect and the Expanse, you should give this a look.

--

Changed Stars is a space opera TTRPG about a universe where humanity tried to colonize the galaxy and got quickly set to rights by the other reigning powers of space. Instead of simply backhanding humanity into their home gravity well, these powers took on humanity as a project---could they make us less like violent children and more like proper citizens of space?

The PDF is 306 pages, ​with small, dense text in a professional layout. This is an old school style full featured TTRPG, and it packs in information and art and mechanics. Everything is bookmarked and hyperlinked, and it feels relatively easy to navigate.

Writing-wise, both the ideas and execution are solid. The text feels compellingly told, and the geopolitical situations the book sets up feel chewy and interesting. Most of the conflict comes from humans falling back on old human atrocity-doing, and I think Changed Stars get a lot of mileage out of positioning us as the galaxy's work-in-progress disaster.

In terms of character creation, things are decently granular without being overcomplicated. There are four stats, twelve skills, quick and slow hp, and a decent spread of species to choose from. Classes are loose, and come with some attribute and skill bonuses, a couple feats, and a unique gimmick called an Edge Break where you can go all out in a class-specific way and then fall into a coma. To round things out there's a robust equipment section and a big chunky drones and vehicles chapter. Ships are quite detailed, and come with a wide range of things for crew to do in combat and while exploring, hitting a very gameable sweet spot in between "5e spelljammer" and "this game is now entirely about ships."

Mechanics-wise, Changed Stars uses a d6 pool. Sixes are hits, one hit is enough to succeed, additional hits can be used to "yes and" the success. Players have decent control over the dice with Edge, that same thing from the Edge Break I mentioned earlier. You can use it to nudge regular rolls too, taking smaller consequences in exchange for goosing the dice a little. Combat, survival, healing, and other tabletop staples are all at about the same level of complexity, but feel fully fleshed out.  Violence feels dangerous, and its consequences feel life threatening, but you can absolutely go loud and have a hero moment without dying.

For GMs, there's a huge worldbuilding section plus general advice, safety tools, a bestiary, and a starter scenario. Nothing feels missing, but also I don't know that anything in here will fundamentally change the way you GM if you've been doing it for a while.

For visual readers, the art by Patrice Danielle Long is excellent! It's a mix of black and white and color, and it does a very necessary job of anchoring the descriptions in the text to something immediate and tangible. The xenofauana looks nice, and the playable species have a lot of charm to them.

I think the folks who might bounce off of this game are those who are looking for something mechanically simple. Changed Stars isn't complicated for the sake of being complicated, but I'd also say it's at about Shadowrun complexity level. A 4--6 player group that's been doing TTRPGs for a while should be able to tackle it with ease. 

Overall, I'm glad games like this are still being made. A GM who clicks with the setting can spin a robust tale inside Changed Stars' universe, and a group who plays in it will get to make detailed characters, get into space hijinks, and more than likely shoot their way out.

[pamicakery]

₊✩‧₊˚Manifesting and the Bible - Part 1 /2˚₊✩‧₊

(Neville Goddard inspired)

Disclaimer :This is my personal thought about religion, Christianity in general. It's my point of view that I wanted to share. If it can hurt your personal belief or you feel uncomfortable with it don't read. But please don't spread hate in comments or rebblog.

I grew up in a Christian family, practicing Baptism, going to church, listening to gospels etc from an atheist family (we believe in resurrection and life after death so it's not really atheism but I don't know how to say it in English)

We no more talk about god, Jesus or the angels. And my mom threw away our Bible.

I always had an interest in the Bible or the Christian mythology in general. And to know that Neville goddard had another way to see the Bible was interesting to me.

WE ARE GOD :

To make it short, the Bible is a story about us for us. What I want to say is that we are God. Not the big man sitting on his throne above the clouds throwing tantrums. We are God, omnipotent and omnipresent.

Omnipotent : we are powerful. We can manifest what we want, we can imagine every possibilities, every outcomes.

Omnipresent :with our minds we can do revisions and living in the end.

WE ARE JÉSUS :

Jesus is our imagination. Create miracles. When he died on the cross it was a metaphor. It's you dying from your old self. You let your old self die to a new self, a new you with new beliefs, assumptions and self concept.

no one cometh unto the Father, but by me.

We have to cross our imagination to come into our real self. Our god state.

SATAN :

Satan is the doubts, the bad circumstances. When Jesus was in the desert he was tempted by the devil. He wanted to seduced him with bread, food etc. To an extent, keeping him away from God.

At the same time, the 3d or the bad circumstances want us to believe that indeed we do not have our desires. And make us doubts.. Doubt in who? Our real self. '' Am I good enough? '' '' Can I manifest that? ''

You know who you are and what you want. When we say that the 3d is an illusion is true. It's an illusion caused by doubts.

Don't let your fear or doubts make you believe that you can't have your desire. You have to keep it strong and have faith. Have faith in yourself. Because the imagination trusts your Godself by showing you what you want in your mind.

I think I will make a part 2 because it's quite long.

But what you need to understand is that the Bible is not a historical book with people who truly existed.

'' When man sees the Bible as a great psychological drama, with all of its character and actors as the personified quality and attributes of his own consciousness, then and then only will the Bible reveal to him the light of its symbology ''

Neville goddard -

Part two here : 🩷

[rogersideup]

Nice to be Kneaded

Chapter 18

Good Luck Charm

Series Masterlist

Previous part: Endgame

Word Count: 9,856

Warnings: My blog is 18+ only. All minors or blogs without an age in bio will be blocked. Minors DNI. Mentions of medical equipment, loss, abuse, PTSD, anxiety and depression.

Your slippers shuffled against the ground as you stepped outside onto the porch. With a big blanket around your shoulders and a warm mug in each hand, you walked up to Steve who had been sitting on the love seat all by himself for about half an hour now.

His eyes were fixed on the wooden deck railing, but fondly found your face as you approached in all your comfortable glory.

"A hot latte for the hottie?" You said, handing him a mug of foamy, vanilla goodness.

His smile spread as fast as his cheeks blushed. "Thank you, baby doll."

"Anything for you."

After his gentle hands grabbed the mug from yours, you set your own coffee down for a moment sit next to him and wrap the blanket around both of your shoulders. He was quick to eat up your company, and shuffle closer to you for warmth.

It was that weird time of year where mornings and nights were cold, but midday was blazing. You were well equipped with leggings and a hoodie with thick warm socks that Steve was quite jealous of, while he was in a T-shirt and joggers. But your blanket, body heat, and the hot coffee warmed his body and his heart.

It had been a few days since half of humanity returned, and you were trying to find a good balance of giving him the space he needed to process the events and grieve his friends, time to reconnect with Bucky, all while trying to make sure you were there for him.

As of now it looked like cuddles and long conversations before bed, you sneaking off and working from 4 in the morning to around 2 in the afternoon, then coming home usually to an empty house since the two boys were out doing whatever Steve's and Bucky's do, then the three of you would have dinner together and you'd be back off to bed.

But today was different. You decided not to work at the bakery today because you knew Bucky was going to go tour apartments near by to see if maybe there was a place worth staying near his best friend for, and Steve would be on his own otherwise. Though he was perfectly capable of getting through a hard time on his own, it was always easier when the two of you were together.

With you settled next to him, his eyes fixed right back to where they were before. You thought he was looking out into the neighborhood, until your eyes caught glimpse of a tiny little creature. A spider spinning a web. Not just any spider, but an all black spider with a small red shape on its back.

A black widow.

You immediately understood where his brain was and what it was thinking about, you didn't even have to exchange words when he knew you saw it too. Together you just sat, sipped, and thought about your dear friend. But the more you thought, the more your heart hurt for Steve, so your mug was sat on the floor once again so you could wrap an arm around his shoulders and hold him closer.

Your actions made him grin, and his hand found your thigh. It squeezed in appreciation.

"Way back when we fought Ultron, we all thought for a brief moment that all of us would die in Sokovia. When I brought up that possibility, all she said was that she would never find a prettier view anywhere else than being that high up in the sky." He finally broke the silence. "I was admittedly a little scared, and she was calm as could be. Using her skills to make a positive difference in the world was all she thought she had. She was okay with dying as long as it was at the hands of the greater good."

You nodded, acknowledging that you were listening but understanding he probably wasn't looking for a response yet.

"Clint told us she seemed completely at peace with her decision, like there was no second question. She knew that's what she wanted. She died for the greater good. I've always been scared of dying in battle for any reason. I made peace with it, I accepted that it could happen, but I was always scared that it would. I know that's not what I want."

Now, you knew what this conversation was about. This is what's been looming over his head for months, the moment you knew was coming.

He finally said it.

"That's how I know I can't do this anymore." His voice dropped to almost a whisper.

Usually, those words coming from a lovers mouth were the worst words anyone could hear. But in this context, you were happy for him.

"I know you can't." You nodded with a sympathetic tone.

"You're not even going to ask me to clarify?" Steve questioned.

"I already know. I've always known." Your small, delicate smile brought him comfort. "Since the moment I found out that you were Captain America I've known two things to be true. The first one being that there was nothing you could do to scare me away, and the second being that your time in the suit was coming to an end."

"Seems like that came easier to you than it did to me." Steve noted, feeling lighter now that he's told you. "It's been looming over me for years, and it wasn't a choice I made lightly."

"Of course it wasn't." You agreed. "I've watched you quietly struggle with this since the day we met. All I've ever wanted for you was to find happiness."

"I had a sense of guilt giving it up, like people would die if I didn't keep doing this, but I know now that the truth is there was a time before me and there will be a time after me in which everyone manages just fine." He continued. "I've been at this for far longer than I think anyone expected, and I know it's time to pass the shield."

"I'm happy for you." You stated, your hand now playing with the hair on the back of his head. "I genuinely am. And I'm proud of you. I can't imagine any of your life has been easy, and choosing to try a new path that leads to an easier, more peaceful life is exactly what you've always deserved."

"I just want you to know I wouldn't have made this choice of it stopped me from taking care of us at any point." Steve stressed. "Our life together is now number one with no set backs. Please take this in the most humble and sincere way I could possibly say this, but a lack of income going forward is not anything we need to be concerned about. We're set, and any future kids we could possibly want are set."

You smiled at his words. "Honey, even if you had less than a dollar to your name, I'd still want you to make this choice. I also mean this very sincerely and humbly, but the bakery is doing really well. I would've been happy to make you a stay at home Dad."

"So this is it." Steve shrugged. "I'll go on one more mission to put the stones back exactly where they need to be, pass the shield over to Sam and be done. The last few days of being Captain America, then it'll be the first days of the rest of our lives."

"I've always thought Steve was cooler than Cap, by the way." You grinned, head landing on his shoulder.

"You're just saying that to make me feel better." Steve giggled, snuggling further next to you. "Thank you for all of your support. It means a lot to me. You've put up with a lot to accommodate what I do. None of it when by without appreciation."

"You do a lot to support me too, at this point, I think the bakery would fall apart without you and all the little things you do for us. They add up, and it makes a massive impact on the way everyone functions and business flows." You reminded him. "We're a team, Love. I'll always have your back and I know you always have mine. I can't wait to see what this next chapter looks like for us."

"I don't think I could properly express how excited I am about it right now amidst all of this chaos, but if I think about it for too long I'll cry." Steve giggled.

"It's okay, I believe you." You smiled.

"And now that the ball is rolling on the bakery in New York, I just feel really hopeful that I'll be busy regardless of the fact that I'm unemployed now."

You laughed as you moved your arm down to hold his hand instead. "I think a life with me is a life with the bakeries. I don't think that's considered unemployment."

"Can I apply for a job at Nice to be Kneaded?" Steve joked. "It'll keep me busy."

"Sure thing, I'll forward you the email you can send in your resume and fill out an application."

"Ugh I'm never gonna get the job." Steve pouted.

"Why not?"

"I haven't updated my resume since 1942, and there's a 66 year gap." He explained. "And the owner of the bakery is so beautiful, I'm going to be fumbling over my words the entire interview!"

Your smile widened, as did the swell of your heart. "I actually know her, I'll put in a good word for you."

"Thank you, Sunflower, that would be great." He smiled and squeezed your hand.

"...Stevie?" You questioned softly.

"Hmm?"

"We don't have to kill it, but that spider can't stay there."

Steve chuckled at your words. "It is pretty terrifying, isn't it?"

"Does Captain America protect people against scary venomous spiders?"

"Oh... did you not just hear the whole 'I'm retiring' part of the conversation?" Steve joked.

"Okay... will my big, strong boyfriend protect me against the scary venomous spider?"

"...but.... I'm scared of spiders" his voice jumped up an octave or two, and lowered in volume earning your giggles.

"Maybe we can just burn the house down?" You suggested.

"Yeah, let's do that." Steve agreed with a big smile. "Or we can relocate it together"

"Awwww!" You cooed unenthusiastically. "How about we wait for Bucky to get back and he can help us?"

"That's the best idea yet"

"At least you have a big, strong boyfriend that'll relocate scary spiders for you!" You jokingly enthused.

Steve's jaw dropped, but his smile and giggles prevailed through his feigned display of betrayal. "You know what?! That spider is gonna come bite you!"

"Not under Bucky's watch, it won't" You laughed.

"It's gonna come all the way over here and crawl aaaalllllllllll the way up your arm" With his middle and index fingers, they climbed up your arm with a feathery light touch as to tickle you on purpose. Your laugh was music to his ears as his hand made it to your neck, then he started tickling right at the base of your shoulder on purpose. "And it's gonna bite you right here for being so mean to me!"

As if it was the most contagious disease known to man, your happiness and laughter seeped into his heart and soul, and just being near you had him feeling the same way. Faster than he could process, you were both laughing as he one-handedly tried to fight off your attempts at giving him spider bites through the tiniest, gentlest pinches he's ever felt in his life.

The two of you were too occupied in each others chaos to notice Georgia walking across the street for a chat. Admittedly, she also got lost in the scene happening in front of her.

Your arms flying at Steve as uncontrollable laughter and smiles flew past each other, Steve trying to block your swift hands with only one of his arms. Then, his mug slipped out of his other hand and splashed coffee all over his lap, onto the blanket, and the mug shattered onto the deck.

For a moment, Georgia recoiled, fully prepared to walk away when Steve inevitably got angry at you for the the loss of a mug and a perfectly good cup of coffee.

But instead, she was pleasantly surprised when there was a pause in all movement and laughter, both of you looked down at the mess all over Steve and the porch, then your eyes met each others again, and the two of you bursted out in even more laughter.

"Oh no! Was that hot? Are you okay?" Your hand grabbed into his upper arm, questioning between laughter. "I'm sorry!"

"Not hot, I'm fine." He chuckled, patting the top of your thigh twice. "Don't be sorry! Let me get rid of this broken glass real quick so you don't cut yoursel- oh. Hi, Georgia."

"Hi, sorry to interrupt." She slowly walked up the steps.

"Oh my goodness, how are you feeling?!" You questioned, feeling indifferent about her approaching you and Steve.

"A lot better. I just uh, I just wanted to come over and thank you guys for your help. I don't remember much of what happened but Adeline from two doors down told me about it. You had no reason to help, let alone bring flowers and check on on me multiple times. So, again, thank you."

"We had reason to help," Steve cut in, remembering your sad years over your strained relationship with your once dear friend. He was committed to making this work for you. "whether you believe it or not, we care about you."

"I certainly understand that now." Georgia nodded her head.

"How has Michael been since he's been back? Is he adjusting okay?" You asked, having felt worried about him since the snap.

"He's been alright, it's been a bit of a shock to him but that's to be expected. He was focused on taking care of me but now that I'm better I think he's really processing the events that took place." She explained. "Steve, I also heard you got injured pretty badly in battle. Are you alright?"

Her concern had over his well-being had him admittedly surprised. "I did get bit roughed up but I'm a lot better now, thank you."

"I owe you an overdue apology." Georgia sincerely stated. "All the years you've been here, I wildly misinterpreted your character. It's clear to me now that I let the media, and Michael's opinion of you get into my head at the time you found your way to Greenwood. You're a good man, and I can tell you're an even better guy for the sweetest little lady in the whole town. I can tell you two love each other very much, and I hope you understand I only ever wanted what was best for her."

"I appreciate your apology." Steve nodded. "I think we both agree and see eye to eye on a lot of things, especially only ever wanting what's best for this sweet girl. But I'm not the only one you owe an apology to."

"I agree." Georgia nodded. She approached you with small apprehensive steps, then squatted down in front of your seat and placed her hand over yours. "Baby girl, I'm sorry."

You nodded, and swallowed the lump in your throat.

"I am. Really, really sorry." She squeezed your hand. "You are and always have been one smart, tough cookie and I should've trusted you to make good choices for yourself. I was wrong. I'm happy you have him, and I'm proud of the life you've created for yourself. It makes me happy to see you doing well. It's obvious that you two love each other very much, and I'm sorry for not seeing that until now."

"Thank you" You accepted. Though you would love nothing more than to have things go back to the way it used to be, Steve has taught you a lot about only accepting what's of value to you. Though him, you learned that the bare minimum wasn't the only treatment you should accept in life. He picked your standards up off the floor and held them above the ground. If Georgia wanted a place back in your life, she would have to fight for it. "I love you, and care about you so much. I always have, and I always will. I think this is a good start to reestablishing our friendship, but you know it's gonna take some time?"

Though this challenge was one for her to face, Georgia was proud to see you finally setting healthy boundaries for yourself. The version of you that she was friends with many years ago was a chronic people pleaser who couldn't get any words to leave her mouth that could possibly be taken badly. This version of you was much different, and far more healed and healthy.

“Of course.” She nodded in understanding

Standing up and letting your hand go, she turned to Steve once more. "And Steve, thank you for your service. I really appreciate and respect what you put on the line to save everyone we lost."

"No problem." He nodded before Georgia walked off right back into her own house.

Silence fell between you two for a few moments after her front door closed, until you broke it. "I never thought that would happen."

“Neither did I.” Steve stared blankly across the street.

More silence.

"Do you think she still would've apologized if she knew we were housing Bucky for the time being?" You questioned.

"Some things are better left unsaid." Steve shrugged.

More silence.

"I've been sitting in a puddle of vanilla latte for 5 minutes." Steve stated.

Then your eyes met his, looked down at his lap that was drenched in coffee, then back up at his face.

Once again, you two bursted out into laughter.

After some scrubbing, googling how to get coffee stains out of clothes, a shower, and a load of laundry later, it was like the coffee incident never happened.

Before you knew it, you and Steve were back in New York for a handful of different reasons. The first being location scouting for the new bakery. You dragged Steve around the city for 3 full days with a contractor and a financial advisor, touring empty business slots. Steve kept joking that you were the Prince Charming of bakery owners, you had a theoretical glass slipper and if one of the buildings didn't perfectly fit, it was an automatic no.

But eventually you found the perfect new home for the bakery. And wildly enough, it was in Brooklyn. The entirety of your search, Steve would make a little half-joke half-serious remark that everything good in the city was in Brooklyn. Sure enough, the moment you stepped foot into building, it was an automatic yes. You signed the lease right then and there, and the contractor started taking measurements as you sat in a pretty office with floor to ceiling windows signing paper after paper.

The only person happier than you about this decision was Steve, who had pointed out that the apartment he used to live in with his mom was just down the block. He also told you about how in building the bakery would now be in, used to be a little bodega where him and his Mom would walk to just to buy marshmallow sandwich cookies.

It made you incredibly happy knowing that such a special place to Steve, where he already had fond memories of getting sweet treats would now turn into a whole new place full of even sweeter treats. You'd like to believe that somewhere out there, Sarah Rogers led you to this corner location just to make his boy happy.

That same day, after all the paperwork was done and your wrist hurt from signing the lease agreement, you and Steve walked hand and hand through the streets of Brooklyn. The two of you had done this together many times before, but each time unlocked a special memory for him, and it always made you happy to learn more about who he was before the war.

This time he walked you along the route he used to take on his bike when he worked as a paper boy to put himself through art school. You passed by the apartment he lived in immediately after his Mom died, and surprisingly enough, it looked exactly the same on the outside. Then, you did what had to be done.

Hand in hand, you walked into a bodega and found the marshmallow cookies. You'd never had them before, but apparently they were one of the most popular treats in the 30's and Sarah adored them. After buying a pack of them, ripping them open and doing a little cheers, you each took and bite of the two crunchy vanilla cookies with marshmallow fluff in the center.

You could see the nostalgia flooding his brain, and all you could do was smile. It was the sweetest celebration you could've ever wanted for such a momentous occasion.

Then, you two went upstate for Tony's funeral.

Steve told you over and over again that you didn't have to go. He knew it would be difficult for the Avengers, and even worse for Pepper and Morgan who you'd never met. You were here for work, and already taking time to support him on his last mission as Captain America, and he felt guilty taking even more of your time.

But as he zipped up the back of your black dress, and you straighten out his tie, you reassured him that you wouldn't miss it for the world. He needed you there even though he wouldn't admit it, and you wanted a chance to see the Avengers again, even under such a terrible circumstance.

The two of you stated the night near the cabin after the funeral. The lake was gorgeous, and the cabin you rented was beautiful. It was quiet, quaint, and Sam and Bucky stayed the night with you guys as well.

You could tell the day had taken an emotional toll on them, where the boys used to bounce off the walls when they were all together, they just sat and held conversation instead. One by one the boys knocked out. Steve was first, he fell asleep sitting next to you on the couch. His head fell lnto your shoulder and his face nuzzled into his neck. Then Bucky lost the battle on the arm chair, leaving just you and Sam chatting for hours.

Conversation came easy between you, and you really enjoyed talking to him. You even got a little sad knowing that it was getting late, and Steve had a big day in the morning so you had to cut the conversation off and get him to bed.

Then, the monumental day came.

Steve's last mission.

He expected to have a lot of sadness letting go of such a monumental part of his life, but as he suited up for the very last time he looked in the mirror and felt like he barely even recognized the reflection anymore.

Your arms snaked around his stomach from behind and you rocked forward onto your tippy toes to give him a kiss on the cheek before looking at him through the mirror. Only then did he feel like himself again.

"Lookin' good, Baby." Your cheeky smile made an appearance. "Feelin' good?"

"Surprisingly, yes." He responded with a grin, his half gloved hands held onto your arms. "I'm excited to get it over with, so ready to turn a new page."

"I think Sam is going to be honored. You're making a really good choice passing him the mantle." You reassured.

"I think so too." He grinned.

"One last picture before you go?" You asked.

"Whatever you want." He agreed.

Like a proud Mom, you took a few pictures of the two of you through the mirror, and a few of just him. Then, you, Steve, Sam, Bucky, and Bruce all met up at the smaller time travel machine that Bruce put together and got ready for Steve's last run.

You waited patiently as they briefed, powered up the Time Machine, and got all of their odds and ends in place.

Once it was good to go, everyone got a hug just in case, except for you that got a hug and a kiss. What could he say? You were just special like that.

"Still got it?" You asked, as always before sending him off.

"Always!" Out of his pocket, he pulled the $20 between his fingers to show you before putting it back in. "Got a little something extra this time too"

Steve grinned as he picked up mjolnir, knowing it was the first time you ever saw him wield the hammer. Then, the cheeky little shit winked at you, earning a laugh and a shake of your head.

"Good luck, baby. It's only the weight entire timeline as we know it on your shoulders, so, no pressure." You smiled.

"No pressure at all, easy peasy." He agreed, stepping onto the platform.

"Go get 'em Cap. Love you!"

"Love you more."

Then you had the greatest privilege of all, saluting the captain for the very last time.

He smiled, nodded, Bruce counted down, then he was gone.

Of course time worked differently for the person time traveling, so even though he was only gone for about a minute or two for you, for him it was hours.

You and Bucky both knew what was about to happen, so the two of you took a physical and mental step back as you waited for his arrival home.

Bruce counted down once more before bringing him back, and you saw him immediately. He purposefully arrived away from the machine, wanting to have a special moment alone with Sam.

He sat alone on a bench looking out onto the lake, no longer in his suit, but in some of his old clothes he got from his place a few years ago. Shield in hand, but in a leather case.

"Where is he? I don't see him?" Bruce questioned.

"Well bring him back!" Sam panicked.

"I did, I thought I-"

"Then where is he?"

"Guys." You cut in. They both stopped and looked at you. Then you pointed at the bench. "Over there."

Both of them looked at you with a confused expression on their face, until Bucky elaborated. "That's for you, Sam."

"Me?" He raised an eyebrow.

"You" you confirmed with a prideful grin.

He hesitantly made his way towards Steve, and watched the conversation from a distance. There wasn't very many words that needed to be exchanged, but even just thinking about how Steve was taking his life into his own hands and making such a big change for the happiness of his own self for once had you choked up.

Just a few weeks ago, he couldn't even fathom fighting for himself. Now, he had moved an entire mountain for his own future.

While this was happening, Bucky filled Bruce in on what was going on. You could hear their conversation, but your eyes never left Sam and Steve as you leaned against a tree.

A few moments went by before the two boys shared a nice hug, Steve stood up without his shield and made his way over to you.

Without a word and a big smile on his face, he reached his hand out to hold yours. Your connected arms swung as you made the shirt walk back into the cabin.

It wasn't until you both stepped inside and closed the door behind you that your arms flew around his neck and his lips pressed against yours.

"Congratulations, Baby!" You said enthusiastically.

"Thank you, Sunflower!" His smile was so uncontrollable he couldn't even get his lips to close enough to kiss you again even if he tried. "Couldn't have done it without you."

"I brought something to celebrate" You noted with a smile just as big as his.

"Champagne?" He questioned.

"Even better," you denied, walking away into the kitchen before pulling something out of the cabinet. You hid it behind your back before approaching him again. "Hold out your hands!"

"Okay" he giggled.

Swiftly, you placed a package of marshmallow cookies in his hands and his smile widened.

"I've been thinking about your Mom a lot since I got the place in Brooklyn, and I was thinking about how happy she would probably be if she knew you were taking a step down from fighting literal wars, going to space, and time traveling." You explained.

"Oh, if she knew anything about what I've been up to since she's passed, I think I would've given her a heart attack." Steve agreed, feeling a bit emotional knowing someone has been thinking of her just as often as he does.

"She deserves to be included in this celebration, considering she made you, and you've been worrying her from her peaceful rest since the moment you lied on your enlistment form."

"That, she does." Steve agreed and handed you a cookie before grabbing his own.

You held it up a bit as you presented a toast. "To the Rogers finding peace."

He giggled at your words before tapping his cookie against yours and eating it. Amused that this was the second time this week the two of you had cheered and celebrated with marshmallow cookies.

Steve finished chewing, swallowed, then an expression you didn't quite recognize spread across his face. It was like he wanted to tell you something, but hesitated and was now internally analyzing the words before they left his lips.

"What?" You asked, cocking your head to the side.

"Did you notice I was a few seconds late?" He asked.

You knew there was a statement beneath the question he asked. The wheels started turning as you wondered what he was getting on about. "I did. A few seconds for us was a few hours for you... what did you do?" You raised a curious bow.

"You know, that essay you wrote about Peggy really stuck with me." He started, you immediately smiled. "Had me thinking a lot about how I found a lot of peace over the lack of control while being in the ice because I got to know what happened to her. She got married to a man I rescued in the war, had kids, lived a full life."

"I already knew that, because I wrote that essay!" You joked, earning a good laugh from Steve.

"Very smart! Remind me to give you a gold star later!" He chuckled. "But she never got that for me, so I took your advice and paid her a visit."

"You just saw Peggy?!" You questioned with wide, sparkly eyes.

"I did." He told you, still a little cautious in not wanting to offend you. "Obviously she was a little shocked because she thought I was dead, but we sat down and had a nice conversation about what had happened and what was gonna happen. But most importantly I met her kids, and told her about you and that essay you wrote."

"No way!" Your smile widened, and your hands found his shoulders.

"Yes way! She was genuinely delighted to hear about us, and gave her best wishes. She also wanted me to pass along a hello to you, and let you know that she thinks you're beautiful. Oh, and she’s that I get all the cookies I want whenever I want them.”

“Stop it, that’s so cute!” You squeaked. “This is like the coolest thing that’s ever happened to me! And you got more closure, which is incredible! What a great day. I’m so happy for you, but I’m also just so happy in general. What an honor”

“I love you, Baby." Steve stated with a big smile, hands pulling you close again when they found their favorite spot on your hips. "I'm so thankful every single day that I found you. You've been a beacon of light in my life, I wouldn't have ever made it here without you to guide me."

"I love you too." You sighed contently, as his arms wrapped around you. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. We deserve this life together."

"We've been through so much to get to this moment. Thanks for sticking with me no matter what. I know it was hard and painful, and definitely illegal at one point, but I hope now I can prove to you that it was worth it."

"You don't have to prove it. You already did. It's been worth it the entire time, and I'll always choose you no matter how illegal it becomes." You smiled and squeezed him tight. "You're the bestest, coolest, loveliest human I've ever met."

"I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you." He kissed the top of your head.

"You've gotta propose for that one, Love." You poked.

"I'm working on it!" He said defensively, causing you to laugh.

And working on it he was. Because even though life proceeded as normal when you made it back to Greenwood, there was still a lot happening.

Bucky found a cute little apartment that was perfect for him not even two blocks away from the new bakery in Brooklyn. It felt like the perfect middle ground of still being close to you and Steve, all while still being able to live where he wanted geographically.

Shortly after Bucky moved out, you and Steve headed out on a trip to California to visit your Mom. This was a tricky one for Steve, because your relationship with you Mom was a tricky one for you.

Although your relationship with her was something you were actively improving since she came back from the snap, Steve still knew that her approval of him didn't mean much to you. But he was still old fashioned in the sense that he still at least wanted to meet her, and ask her for permission to propose to you before he popped the question.

Whether he felt like her permission or lack there of would actually make a difference for him taking what he wanted was a wash, but he wanted to do it anyways just to be able to know that he tried at the very least.

This was his second time visiting California with you, and he loved it just as much this time around. You guys stayed in your childhood bedroom at your Mom's house that resided in a lazy town on the bay.

He learned a lot about you from the charm of the house alone. The pictures on the walls of baby you, teenage you, and early adulthood you. Conversations exchanged with your mom over breakfast where she never missed an opportunity to share her favorite stories of your antics growing up. He also learned a lot about your Dad because of how frequently he came up in almost every conversation, and he desperately wished he could've met him. Just from what he's heard, he could tell a lot of who you were came from him.

Every night, you and Steve would go out onto the dock to watch the sunset and listen to music together.

You shared stories with him about what felt like endless hours of you sitting on the dock with your dad. Back then, the hours felt long and gruesome. As if sitting and watching the little creatures in the water beneath you was some sort of torture, but as you grew up and towards the end of his life, it became a sanctuary. It was the only place he seemed to be truly calm and relaxed as his memories and executive function left him. By that point, you wished the hours were endless rather than having a metaphorical clock ticking over his head.

Then, when the moon was out and the sky was dark it would somehow evolve into you and Steve slow dancing under the stars.

During the day you'd take him out and show him all of your favorite old spots. Hole in the wall food joints, family owned ice cream shops, the tide pools, and even long drives up the coast to the same music you would dance with him.

It was relaxed, easy, and Steve passed your Mom's unspoken test with flying colors. He sneakily got her approval two days before you guys left California while you were in the shower.

She was so happy about it that Steve almost had to keep you away from her as much as he could so she didn't ruin the surprise.

Then, on your last night in town, you guys walked over to the dock just like every other night since you've been here. Only this time, it was a little later. Dinner ran late so by the time you made it out for one last night, the sun was already setting.

But it was okay, because when the two of you approached hand in hand, and he watched your face twist up with a billion different emotions when you realized that the dock was covered in flowers and lit up with the soft golden glow of dozens of candles, it was all worth it.

At first you were sad because you thought it was for someone else, and the dock was now unusable for you and Steve on your last night. But as he continued walking towards it, and his hand holding yours was shaking and a little clammy, only then did you realize what was happening.

He could barely even get a single word out, let alone present the ring to you and get down on one knee before you were already saying yes. But he was thankful for your enthusiasm, because it instantly took his nerves away.

The ring was perfect, the proposal was perfect, and dancing under the twinkling stars and amongst the burning candles was perfect.

Your fiancé was perfect.

Knowing that he listened to your stories and took them to heart, and incorporating a special place that reminded you of your dad into your love story made you weep happy tears and he held you close and swayed you to the music.

Happy tears seemed to be a common occurrence between the two of you recently, and each little drop was well deserved and worked for.

That night when you got back to your Mom's place, you didn't even have to tell her the news before she flung her arms around you and Steve at the same time in a big bear hug. It was safe to say she was over the moon.

Just to make things even better, that night you and your Mom ended up having a really nice heart to heart. A lot of the issues you've had with her since you were little were addressed, and she apologized for encouraging you to stay with your ex after she realized how bad the relationship actually was. For the first time ever, she told you how proud of you she was, and how amazing you were for the success of the bakery. She promised to visit you out in Greenwood again, and see the bakery and Brooklyn on opening day.

For a little while, your life had felt like an embarrassment of riches, like or was going just a little too well for just a little too long.

Especially when Steve set off on a personal journey of trying to discover who he really was without jumping from battle to battle. It felt like every day the two of you would set off on a little adventure to try out something new.

Between work going so well, and all the fun dates you were going it, it felt like a smile didn't leave your face for months.

Long drives to little towns in the area, pottery and ceramics classes, yoga, pilates, meeting new friends at bars, then getting dragged home and put to bed, hosting dinner parties with you little Greenwood family, then doing the same thing all over again but in Brooklyn with friends you had made over in the big city. It was exciting, new, and you'd never seen Steve quite so radiant before.

Life was easy for a while, but with highs came lows that couldn't be ignored. The closer opening came for the Brooklyn bakery, the harsher the deadlines, and the more stressed you became.

Focusing on one bakery alone was a full time job in itself, but adding in another one had you practically ripping your hair out in the final few months.

All the choices fell on you, all of the paperwork fell on you, and all of the management choices that still needed to be made for the Greenwood bakery were on you as well, and there were no amount of shoulder massages and support Steve could give you to change that.

It was pretty much accepted that the only way out was through, and it would get much much easier once the new team of employees were trained and the doors were opened.

However, the stress took a toll on your body and landed you in the emergency room one fateful night. For the past year, your periods had become more and more painful. The second day of your cycle every since month Steve would try his best to console you through the pain. Hugs, back rubs, heating pads, painkillers, wasn't enough this time around.

You were throwing up, full body chills, goosebumps raised on your skin, and he couldn't get you to uncurl yourself from the tightest little ball unless it was to roll around in discomfort or getting up to vomit again. As much as it hurt his heart to have to bring you somewhere that had such traumatic experiences associated with it, you tapped out. The pain was so bad that you'd rather go to the emergency room than deal with it any more.

Luckily, the worst part was sitting in the waiting room. You sat curled up on his lap, and he held you so snug to him, it's like he was trying to hide you away from all the awful memories. When they finally took you back, they gave you so many pain killers that you were higher than a kite for the rest of it. Lots of exams, two doctors appointments, and a few medical bills later, they decided it was your birth control that needed to be switched.

All was well until a few months later when you woke up nauseous, and ravenously hungry at the same time. Having pushed through it, and gone to work, you called Steve on your lunch break to rant about how grouchy you felt, and how everything was getting on your last nerve.

He decided to stop by and drop off your favorite food to cheer you up since you still had a long day ahead of you. When he gave you a big long hug to try and make you feel better, you started crying because of how nice he was.

That's when it clicked in his head that your period was a whole week late. He brought it up cautiously, and you both agreed that you'd be taking a pregnancy test after work.

Steve picked up a few different kinds from the store, and both of you separately processed what this all meant while waiting for the time to come to have a real answer.

By the time you had gotten off of work and Steve ushered you straight up the stairs, you had gone through all seven stages of grief, and acceptance for whatever the future held for you. Mostly because you knew that no matter what, Steve would be incredible, and you were ready to take on anything life threw your way as long as he was there to hold your hand through it.

That's exactly what he did. You took the test, flipped it face down, and brought it out into the bedroom where you snuggled up together and for three whole minutes, he comforted you and reminded you that it would be okay no matter what.

The timer he set on his phone went off, you asked him to flip the test over.

Both of you read it at the same time, Negative.

Your eyes found each others faces to gauge any sort of reaction. He saw your lip wobbling and tears pooling in your lash line, and you saw him trying his absolute best to hide every drop of disappointment.

"Hey, it's okay." He reminded you with nothing louder than a soft whisper. When his gentle hands tucked your hair out of your face, and he grinned just to bring you some comfort, you fell apart. "It's okay."

"I'm sorry" You apologized, shoving your face into his chest. You didn't know if the apology was for your emotions or the disappointment you were both feeling but left unspoken.

"Don't you dare apologize, my love." He said sweetly, protectively cradling the back of your head. "All I wanted was your health to be a priority, that's why the test was important. As long as you're okay, I'm okay too."

As always, you took his words to heart. You never expected to be so disappointed by the negative result when you weren't actively trying to get pregnant in the first place. You also weren't expecting to be so effected by the tiniest shimmer of sadness in Steve's eyes when he read the test.

Your period showed up the next day, but the thought of having a baby intruded your every waking thought for the next month. It felt like the only time you weren't actively thinking about it was when you were working, but even then, you'd read deadlines printed on papers and wonder if now was a good time.

But then you realized now was a great time. The bakery was set to open in just a few short months, then most of the responsibility would be handed over to staff who was training hard to handle it. Steve was doing better now than ever, and wedding planning hadn't even started yet.

Much like Steve didn't want to propose until he retired, you didn't want to plan a wedding until the bakery was open for business.

With downtime promised in the future, and a sparkly engagement ring on your finger that reminded you of your sweet handsome boy, you decided to just talk to him about the possibility of even just trying.

Just like always, Steve was a thoughtful guy. He choose all of his words carefully through all of your long conversations about the decision to have a kid. You knew he so badly wanted to say yes, in fact, you swore if he was a dog his tail would be wagging every time he even thought about it. But it was a big choice and a huge life change, he wanted to make sure it was really something you wanted and not something you felt pressured into since that one fateful day.

It took 3 more weeks before both of you were wholeheartedly committed to the endeavor with the agreement and the knowledge that it might mot happen right away.

The prospect settled in your mind, and you just enjoyed the journey while you allowed work to be your main priority at the moment. And with so many deadlines approaching, you really didn't have any other choice than to just let the universe work it's magic.

The closer opening day became, it was like the bakery had become your and Steve's child. The two for you spent weeks in the store in Brooklyn painting walls, assembling endless amounts of furniture, directing deliveries, and decorating the lobby to live up to the very high standards of the Greenwood location.

By the time the kitchen was fully stocked, employees were trained, and the whole space was perfect from head to toe, you were both exhausted.

The very last night before opening, you checked every last screw, every bulb in the bake case, every seam in the wallpaper, and quality controlled every last desert on a finalized menu, you and Steve quite literally laid sprawled out on the floor of the lobby.

Steve took a good look around, and was so incredibly proud of all the blood, sweat, and tears you shed to make your dreams come true. He knew that if his mom was around to see what this building had turned into if not her beloved bodega, she would be absolutely thrilled to have something like this in the neighborhood.

You laid flat on your back, looking up at the expertly painted ceiling mural and the chandelier, every crystal hung from it by the will of your own two hands.

Then, your rolled over onto your stomach, and your hand pat right in the center of Steve's chest.

"It's midnight, and I have to be back here at 4 in the morning. Maybe I should just have a sleepover." Your exhausted grin took over when you saw his sleepy face.

"You should get a few hours of real sleep before your big day, pretty lady." Steve denied, getting up off the floor and offering his hands to pull you up off the floor. "It looks incredible, you did an amazing job as always."

"It's funny that you think I'll get any sleep at all" You stood, then gave him a kiss. "I really couldn't have done it without your help, so, thank you, Baby."

"Anything for you." He smiled. "I can't wait to see it in the morning, I have butterflies just thinking about this place full of people."

"You and me both." You squeezed his hand. "You don't think the rug clashes with the wallpaper? And the chairs match the wood on the booths?"

"Stop, it's perfect." Steve put your mind to rest. "Just like you!"

"Yeah yeah yeah," you giggled, walking behind the counter. "I guess you're pretty cool too. There's a few cookies left from the test bake. You want some?"

"Wait! Hold on" Steve said dramatically, walking away from you and out of the store.

You stood there confused for a few moments, before he walked back in. Nothing had changed, but he did approach the counter.

"Hello, I'm your first customer!" He enthused.

You giggled, looking at the case that was empty besides 2 chocolate chip cookies. "Hi there, Honey! What can I get'cha?"

"One chocolate chip cookie please" He smiled.

You knew he was recreating the moment the two of you met, though that felt like lifetimes ago, you could never forget the vivid memory of seeing his handsome face for the very first time.

"Okay, but I'm giving you two, because I think anyone who orders one cookie is lying to themselves." You said, putting the cookies in a bag for him.

"Why thank you very much!"

"I don't think I've seen you around here before, are you driving through?" You joked.

"Something like that." He chuckled.

"Well I hope to see you around here again soon, and here are your cookies." You handed him the bag.

"How much do I owe you?" Steve asked.

"They're on the house."

"I couldn't possibly accept that" Steve denied, pulling his wallet out of his back pocket. Out came the very same $20 bill the two of you have been passing back and forth since the day you met. You smiled and shook your head at him as he handed it to you. "You have a big day tomorrow, I think it's your turn to hold onto the good luck charm."

You accepted the pass off, "this doesn't mean I lost this argument, did it?"

"It totally does" Steve did a little happy dance.

"You're a cheeky little shit, but I love you."

He laughed at your statement, "I love you more!"

"I have a little surprise for you" You noted.

"You do?" His eyebrows raised.

Nodding, you pointed to an empty slot in the bake case. His eyes followed to read the tag, Sarah's Sandwich Cookies.

His big blues met yours again with the happiest puppy dog pout you've ever seen in your life, if that was even possible.

"What you said about your Mom really stuck with me, and I wanted to make sure her and her love for cookies were honored in a place you hold special memories in. So, marshmallow cookies are permanent and exclusive on the menu for this location." You explained.

He didn't have much to say, but he did walk around the counter and wrap you up in a big hug. "That's the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. Thank you."

"I wish I could've met her." You noted.

"She would've loved you so much, probably more than me." He giggled from above you.

"Impossible" you denied.

He gave you a kiss before letting you go.

"As much as I'd love to stay here forever and ever, I really do want to make sure you get some sleep." Steve noted.

"We can go now." You agreed, heart nervously pounding in your chest. "hey, really quick do you mind checking the oven to make sure it properly cooled down while I lock this register?" You asked.

"Sure thing, sweet thing" he nodded.

As he walked off, you smiled to yourself and your stomach filled with butterflies. You let him get a few paces ahead of you before leaning into the doorway of the kitchen while watching him reach for and open the oven doors.

He checked the temperature of the internal thermometer, which looked normal to him, but then, he stopped.

"Hey, I think someone forgot something in here!" He shouted for you, not quite understanding.

"That's odd, what is it?" You approached from behind.

"A cinnamon roll, but just one, and it's on a... plate?" He looked at it again. "Did you guys even make cinnamon rolls today?"

You smiled and shook your head at his wholesome cluelessness, but all of his attention was directed at getting the cinnamon roll out of the oven.

"No, we didn't." You denied. "But why would that be there in the first place?"

"Maybe someone wanted to warm one up them forgot about it" He pondered before pouting at it. "I don't know if that's more sad for the cinnamon roll or the person who forgo-"

Then he stopped.

His eyes met yours and his mouth fell open.

"Why would there possibly be a bun in the oven?!" You continued questioning with a huge uncontrollable smile, even though you were positive he understood now.

"You're lying." His eyes went wide, smile slowly spreading across his lips as tears welled in his eyes.

"No I'm not." You shook your head again with a chuckle and walked towards him. Out of your back pocket, you pulled out a very positive pregnancy test and showed it to him. "I'm definitely pregnant, like, super pregnant."

"You're pregnant?!" He blinked back his tears, one fell right down his cheek. "Like, right now?!"

You wiped it off with your thumb as you laughed at his question. "Right now."

"Holy shit!" He smiled, his hands landing on your shoulders, gently shaking them very enthusiastically. "You're pregnant! We're having a baby!"

"We are, we really really are!" You shared his enthusiasm, shaking his shoulders right back.

"Oh my gosh! When did you find out?" He questioned, eyes wide and staring at you in disbelief.

"Three days ago, I would've told you sooner but I wanted to surprise you." You explained, wiping another happy tear off his cheek.

"That's crazy, this is so crazy." He chuckled, finding himself unable to stop the tears from dripping down his cheeks. "How are you, are you feeling okay?"

"I've been constantly nauseous and trying so hard to hide it." You giggled at your own confession. "But other than that, so far so good. Are you feeling okay?"

"I didn't even know it was possible to be this happy or this in love but for some reason I'm feeling both at the same time, and I don't know what to do with myself." He confessed.

You smiled at his state of emotion, and smothered his face in kisses as he processed the news you just told him. Then, the news sunk in and his arms wrapped around you, and he took his turn smothering you in kisses.

"I'm so excited to go on this journey with you, this is incredible" he cried happily.

"You're gonna be the best dad ever." You cheesed, squeezing him back.

With two fingers under your chin, he raised your head and pressed a long, loving kiss on your lips. His palm rested on your cheek, and you sleepily sighed at the comfort of being held by your favorite boy.

"God, I love you so much." He confessed once more for the billionth time that day. "This is the most selfless thing anyone could ever do for someone, and I get to spend the rest of my life spoiling you rotten every single day and I'm so happy about it."

"It was so hard for me not to immediately tell you" You giggled. "But it was worth it to see you cute little face."

"Now I really want to make sure you get some sleep!" He enthused. "Oh, also..."

He pulled away from you and reached into his pocket, then pulled out a crisp $10 bill and handed it to you.

"What is this for?" You questioned, unable to hide your smile.

"Extra good luck! 10 for you, 10 for me, 10 for cinnamon roll." He explained.

"Never in my life have I felt quite as lucky as I do right now." You accepted.

$30 worth of good luck or not, the universe sent you Steve Rogers, and that was the day you won the lottery. That made you the luckiest girl I'm the whole world.

"Baby, if you need anything, and I mean anything, you better tell me to get it done for you. Hungry? I'm gonna find you a Michelin star meal. Tired? You better believe you're getting a full body massage. Can't reach the top shelf? Ring a bell and I'll bring a latter." He told you, and you could tell he was being absolutely serious. "I don't want you lifting a single finger, and I mean it!"

You chuckled and shook your head. "Don't say what you don't mean, because I'm going to be needing you a lot of that's the case"

"Being needed is literally all I've ever wanted in life" Steve accepted your statement.

"Well now with our little cinnamon roll on the way, we're both going to need you more than you'll ever know." You kissed him, and wiped the last of the happy tears off of his cheeks.

"You're right, it really is so nice to be needed."

The end 🌟🤍

@patzammit @bemysugarbean @buckymydarlingangel @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @differenttyphoonwerewolf @themotherof10 @talesofadragon @spikeluv84 @bitchy-bi-trash @crazyunsexycool @openup-yourmind @selella @kattreffic @benedict-squirtle @magnificentsaladllama @calwitch @avengersinitiative2012 @rogersbarber @daddywattpad4945

[joyfullywizard]

Hi! Really would like to know your opinions about Nosferatu remake considering everything?

Hey! Well, lol, it's all quite funny really in a way. Of course, I'm basing my opinions thus far on promotion materials only like trailers and stuff.

Cause  it seems that surprisingly remake is shaping up to be very tropey. Tropey in a sense that it uses lots of fanfic-ish tropes and  tries to insert some form of shipping  of Ellen  with Orlok. And since Nosferatu brand is very much built on “vampire brings plague which destroys city and woman sacrifices herself to kill him and stop him” mode, and it’s kinda a fixed point of 1922  Nosferatu movie  and its 1979 remake, it ��seems the author of the 2024 remake had to work it backwords and make up the reason how Ellen, who still needs to sacrifice herself to Orlok and die, could still be into vampire. So, they gave her some death-wish, death-kink  in the remake or something based on the trailer. Which is quite interesting, because it basically  changes her whole sacrifice and death. Like in 1922 movie her sacrifice was a big act of heroism, and it was spelled in the movie   “A woman pure in heart, who will offer her blood freely to Nosferatu and will keep the vampire by her side until after the cock has crowed”.  Her entire deal  was  that she’s good and pure and sweet. Here Ellen is attracted to Death, dying, so on, it’s mentioned in the trailer that she has a secret and has her condition since childhood – so it’s not Orlok’s influence that made her suddenly into all that stuff, she seems to be like that since forever and Orlok is merely tapping into that. So when Ellen will be giving herself to vampire it will be  less about saving the city from plague and vampire who spreads it, while eating half of city’s population, like in 1922 original and its 1979 remake[though I suspect remake!Ellen must be also sad about all that stuff, cause they can’t make her into full blown psychopath] and more about her getting off and getting what she always actually wanted.   Something, something sexual liberation and fulfillment which she couldn’t get in life otherwise, but getting now   via having sexy times with vampire, even if she dies in the end in the process but it’s all fine, cause she was actually very  happy with Death and bonking vampire anyway, lol .

Speaking of which…another big glaring trope is that remake seems to be shitting on Ellen’s human life partner aka husband – Thomas. The trailer puts down Thomas and spells that he sucks in bedroom or something. Which is definitely a choice, but also kinda a huge cliché for vampire media since…a long time. It didn’t happen in 1922 movie or 1979 movie.  I mean such stuff is obviously done in order to push forward Ellen-Orlok combo, by introducing reasons why it’s actually understandable that Ellen falls for Orlok. Like yeah, he’s walking cadaver, ugly and smells like rotting meat and he brings Black Death and stuff, but hey, he fucks better than Thomas (metaphorically at least) and vibes with Ellen’s uber goth nature and he's basically the embodiment of Death, while Ellen is super into Death.   Extra predictions: while Thomas is supposed to be a good guy overall, based on 1922 movie and its 1979 remake, apart from dunking on Thomas’s sex performance remake probably will be undermining their relationships in other ways, by like showing that Thomas doesn’t  really understand Ellen, she’s too weird for him or  maybe even scares him at times, with her behavior,  so he wouldn’t trust her, etc.….Bonus predictions: at some  point in the remake Ellen-Orlok’s deal will be referred to as “dark romance” or “dark love” or something like that to drive a point across that Thomas not only lost by not killing vampire and not saving his wife’s life, but also by losing his wife emotionally and like sexually, because of  all that stuff.  TDRL: Thomas is getting cucked in more  ways than one by narrative  in the remake, it seems.

Another weird stuff I got  from the trailer is that Ellen seems to be not that smart in the remake actually. Like in 1922 original movie Ellen is the one who takes the lead, does enquiry on her own, reads occult literature and learns  about the way how to kill Orlok. Then she comes up with a plan all on her own and sets it in motion all by herself, inviting vampire in and keeping him occupied  with her blood until sun destroys him. 1979 remake only  built on that  - Ellen (named Lucy in remake) not only researched a way how to kill vampire all by herself, but also went and purified vampire’s coffins on her own, and even tried  to reason with the townspeople, who didn’t believe her  and local blink-and-you-miss-him Van Helsing, who was  absolutely useless,  then she  made up a plan and  invited vampire  in and kept  him with her until the sun destroyed him. Yet in the trailer of the remake we got a scene of local Van Helsing variant  character or someone like that giving Ellen a  lecturing pep talk about how only she could redeem the town. Eh, lol, what? OG Ellen didn’t need any  pep talk and lectures  from anyone, she was smart and capable and brave enough herself, both in original movie and its 1979 remake. If anyone, it would be Ellen who would be giving  lecturing pep talks to people -and she did in 1979 remake actually.  So, like, Ellen in the 2024 remake does not seem to be actually that brave – cause she’s already giddy with concept of Death, plus has some type of hysteria (?) and most likely would be not-so-secretly only happy to die because of her death-kink, her husband doesn’t seem enough for her, Ellen also doesn’t seem to be that smart either – cause she needs another character, a male character specifically, to give her lectures on the issue (???), like is remake giving the whole making up the plan how to kill Orlok to an old dude now (?!),  what was that about?

Again, I’m only speculating and throwing out suspicions- predictions on the wall, but so far the trailers gave me huge  tropey - cliché vibes from a lot of vampire media, but which previously definitely weren’t in Nosferatu movies.