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The Story of Us: Chapter 3
pairing: logan sargeant x famous!fem!singer
summary: logan and you have been keeping a secret from everyone but it might be time for it to come out
a/n: while I do my best on most of my works to be race neutral, this one is very very very self indulgent 🤷🏻♀️
a/n2: this is part 3 of 4/5, which will be released when they’re finished and I’m using pretty much everything from Taylor Swift
a/n3: I still don’t understand instagram so - no one but those that follow you can see a private accounts comments (even on a public post). Also I still hate twitter so I’ve replaced it with Bluesky.
a/n4: Also timelines? Never heard of them. This is set in 2024 but I’ve moved Miami to before Australia
a/n5: I’m pretending that the race schedule is known more then a year in advance so…
Part 1 Part 2
y/n
liked by charles_leclerc, georgerussell63, logansargeant, landonorris, and 12,284,124 others
y/n: loving the tour, missing the simple days
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user1: never seen someone so fucking pretty
↳user2: absolutely jaw dropping
user3: adding several things to my bucket list
↳user4: same!
↳user5: I just want to add her cloths to my closet
not_oscar: this is gonna cause so much trouble oh my god y/n
↳not_y/n: 😂🤭😂😉
↳not_oscar: i give it minutes before those losers start posting vaguely similar photos…
↳not_logan: no bet dude. It’s gonna happen
alexandrasaintmleux: Tu es aussi magnifique que les œuvres d'art sur les murs. You're just as stunning as the art on the walls.
↳charles_leclerc: Comme tu l'as dit, mon amour. As you said, my love.
↳user6: bringing in reinforcements??
↳user7: well at least it’s not cheating now I guess 😂😂
pierregasly: On ne devrait jamais avoir à porter ses propres sacs pour faire ses courses! One should never have to carry their own bags when shopping!
↳francisca.cgomes: Je t'ai bien appris. I’ve taught you well.
↳user8: oh boy the desperation…
georgerussell63: what’s you current read? I’ve been looking for some recommendations!
↳user9: How Not to Flirt with Someone Not your Girlfriend and Dumbassery 101
↳user10: 😂😂
alex_albon: do you offer horse riding lessons?
↳user11: don’t…don’t you own a horse???
↳user12: I think the drivers have passed from desperate into just being sad…
landonorris: visiting New York soon — any suggestions?
↳user13: getting a life maybe?
georgerussell63
liked by carmenmmundt, alex_albon, lilymhe, and 1,283,123 others
georgerussell63: Love those London days
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user14: …so this is blatant y/n bait right?
↳user15: absolutely!
↳user16: I think my favorite part of the season so far is how fucking stupid these drivers turn in the face of y/n…
↳user17: it has been funny to watch
oscarpiastri: why are you posting London photos? We’re in Japan?
↳georgerussell63: its call a photo dump Oscar
↳oscarpiastri: I think it’s actually called stupidity…
↳not_logan: 😂😂 please continue to call them out
↳not_oscar: well someone has to and it’s obviously not gonna be you…
↳not_y/n: not yet at least…
↳not_logan: the next part of your plan??
↳not_y/n: 🤭
↳not_oscar: you mean to tell me you actually have a plan for this madness?!???
user18: call him out Oscar!
↳user19: fighting for his best friend really…
user20: you can tell these aren’t recent because it’s still FUCK ASS cold in London right now
↳user21: oh my god I didn’t even notice that…🤣🤣
sargeantnation
liked by not_y/n, user, user, and 834,244 others
sargeantnation: not the weekend that Logan wanted but boy did he look good while he was there
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user22: made it further than his teammate did…
↳user23: barely
user24: you’ll get it next week Logan!
user25: did you see the look on vowles’ face??
↳user26: he definitely need acting lessons
↳user25: right? Like dude can you try and act like you actually like both of your drivers?
↳user26: I fear for Logan…it took so long for his contract renewal and vowles all but said he would have gone with someone else if they were an option…
↳user25: do not even speak that into existence!!!
user27: such a let down after last week…
↳user28: not everyone is max verstappen!
↳user27: going from a podium to last place though…
↳user26: and remember how lackluster vowles congratulations were for it??
↳user25: 😬😬😬 not. good.
Private Messages
pierregasly
liked by charles_leclerc, francisca.cgomes, user2 and 1,928,223 others
pierregasly: Missing those summer days and beach dates 🩷
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user29: hmmmm…not liking this
↳user30: the blatant attempt to shoot his shot at y/n completely overlooking his gorgeous girlfriend? liked by francisca.cgomes
↳user29: yeah that 😂
oscarpiastri: this is…not it
↳pierregasly: you’re supposed to be Norris’ problem — not mine
↳oscarpiastri: I’ll be everyone’s problem
↳user31: show them how it’s done Oscar!
charles_leclerc: enjoying that sunset? 🌅
↳pierregasly: enjoying the company more 🩷
↳user32: hopefully it’s Kika!
y/n_nation
liked by carlossainz55, alexandrasaintmleux, iamrebeccad, and 11,124,135 others
y/n_gossip: Weeks into her tour, y/n has brought out multiple new outfits for her highly talked about Eras tour. Here’s a carousel of some our favorites!
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iamrebeccad: she could be a model…
↳carlossainz55: ¡Sabrías hermosa! You would know beautiful!
↳user33: girl go back to your actual boyfriend and leave y/n alone 😭😭
user34: is this a safe space? Can I say something?
↳user35: do it regardless
↳user34: I’m starting to believe user19…
↳user19: HAHA
↳user35: you summoned them
↳user34: brb putting on my clown hat 🤡
alexandrasaintmleux: Des couleurs si magnifiques ! Sur un magnifique modèle 💕 Such gorgeous colors! On a gorgeous model 💕
↳charles_leclerc: Presque aussi magnifique que toi. Almost as stunning as you.
↳user36: …👎🏻
user19: i have more proof for you people if that’s something that you need
↳user53: how??? Neither of them have posted anything even vaguely related to them being in a relationship
↳user19: after all this time you still doubt me??
↳user53: of course not but really?
↳user37: I’m gonna start my own crazy train — you guys are dating
↳user19: I’m gonna block you
↳user37: MORE PROOF
charles_leclerc
liked by alexandrasaintmleux, pierregasly, user, and 2,145,924 others
charles_leclerc: I’m laughing on the car ride home with you ♥️
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user38: oh so now we’re blatantly quoting y/n’s songs now?
↳user39: well she’s been ignoring her apparently many boyfriends 😂
alexandrasaintmleux: Toujours, mon amour Always, my love
↳user40: girl he’s trying to cheat on you
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↳user41: anyone else catch that?
↳user40: 😑😑😑
oscarpiastri: oh it’s so good you and Alex are taking time together
↳not_y/n: thank you for your service 🫡
↳not_oscar: I expect something for this
↳not_y/n: summer break with me and Logan?
↳not_oscar: sure
↳user42: thank you king for your continued service
alex_albon: going shirtless? For free?
↳charles_leclerc: anything for the fans
↳alex_albon: is that what we’re calling it nowadays?
↳logansargeant: 😂😂
user43: user19 can you give us more proof please
↳user19: I WOULD LOVE TO
↳user53: please stop screaming
Bluesky
logansargeant
liked by not_y/n, georgerussell63, oscarpiastri, and 1,284,923 others
logansargeant: a full heart and a full living room
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user44: I need more photos of boyfriend Logan in my life
↳user48: I just need Logan as a boyfriend
not_y/n: 🥰🥰🥰 I love you so much Logan
↳not_logan: I love you too. More then I can ever say
oscarpiastri: thanks for the sleeping place
↳logansargeant: it’s always open for you
↳user19: ☝🏻☝🏻 LOVER CODED
alex_albon: when am I gonna get an introduction?
↳logansargeant: soon I promise — but she has a plan
↳alex_albon: can’t argue with that I guess 😂
↳logansargeant: oh I never argue with her…
↳user53: user19 they have a plan???
↳user19: well she’s a mastermind liked by logansargeant
user49: THATS NEW YORK, PARIS, LONDON
↳user19: I TOLF YOJ
↳user19: Welcome to New York, Paris, London Boy, and Lover! All in one post!
iamrebeccad
liked by carlossainz55, alexandrasaintmleux, francisca.cgomes, and 2,334,235 others
iamrebeccad: race dates and date dates 🩶
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carlossainz55: Chicas impresionantes! Stunning girls!
↳iamrebeccad: thank you my love
↳user50: 🤮
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user51: user12 was right…it didn’t take long at all for the wags to jump on the y/n train…
↳user12: ok but I am seeing a vision
↳user52: is the vision a Carlos-y/n-rebecca threesome? liked by carlossainz55, iamrebeccad
↳user12: yes it is
alexandrasaintmleux: lunch tomorrow?
↳iamrebeccad: sorry plans tomorrow! Day after?
↳alexandrasaintmleux: plans or plans 😂
↳iamrebeccad: plans
y/n_gossip
liked by logansargeant, landonorris, carlossainz55, and 18,234,023 others
y/n_gossip: y/n and y/n_nation has been posting videos and teasers of these vaults — thoughts?
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user54: music video?
user55: merchandise? It’s been awhile since they’ve dropped anything new!
maxverstappen1: new music?
↳user56: car boy I know you’re used to being fast but we don’t demand new music around here
↳user57: we’re gonna have put together a pamphlet on how to act aren’t we…
↳user58: not a bad idea actually…
not_oscar: why do you keep doing this y/n???
↳not_y/n: sorry not sorry 😂
↳not_lilyz: ohhh new music??
↳not_y/n: yes!
↳not_lilyz: oh my god i can’t wait!
↳not_y/n: I’ll send some voice notes for you my love 🩵
alexandrasaintmleux
liked by charles_leclerc, iamrebeccad, user and 1,192,469 others
alexandrasaintmleux: Voir l’art, c’est connaître l’amour. To see art is to know love.
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user59: stunning
↳user60: she really is
↳user61: can charles fight?
user12: user52 ok this or the other?
↳user52: definitely charles-y/n-alex liked by alexandrasaintmleux, charles_leclerc
charles_leclerc: Alors j'ai été béni tous les jours. Then I’ve been blessed everyday
↳user63: i am begging at this point…
↳user64: no I get it 🤤🤤
↳user63: what? Eww no. I’m begging them to realize they’re promoting cheating…
logansargeant
liked by oscarpiastri, alex_albon, williamsracing, and 923,824 others
logansargeant: Not how I expected Australia to go but we preserve — let’s go Alex!
comments have been limited on this post
alex_albon: thanks for the support!
↳logansargeant: of course!
oscarpiastri: mom said to plan on dinner at our place this weekend
↳logansargeant: yum!
y/n
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y/n: it’s time to open the vault — and release all the secrets. Tomorrow — 26 new tracks
be the first to comment
Private Messages
Taglist
@anamiad00msday @suns3treading @daniskywalkersolo @awritingtree @justheretoreadthxxs @coral7161 @lost4lyrics @mastermindbaby
#f1 smau#f1#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 instagram au#f1 x reader#f1 x you#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 instagram au#logan sargent fluff#logan sargeant smau#logan sargent x reader#logan sargeant x you#logan sargeant x reader#logan sargeant#logan sargeant imagine#formula 1 smau#formula 1 social media au#formula 1 x y/n#formula 1 x you#formula 1 x reader#formula one x reader#formula 1#formula one#formula one x you#formula one x y/n#formula one x oc#formula one imagine#formula one fanfiction
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˚₊‧꒰ა ed tips ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
( in depth…)
(skip don’t report pleasee)
- diet soda (not a very healthy choice)but a tasty one
- gum! i love gum especially when ik i just wanna eat something because im bored 🤔
-safe foods!!find ur fave low cal food heres some of mine⬇️
tuna packs (70-120 cals) i love adding stuff to these! also a good source for protein
pickles for obvious reasons (0-5 cals)
popcorn!!! there’s so many low cal options its kind of a “volume” snack to me (80-160 cals)
club crackers mini aghhh i love theses another “volume”snack in my opinion cmon 34 pisces for (140 cals)
gold fish LOVE (120cal)
shrimp is a nice choice each shrimp is like under 10cals (70-100 cals)
LIGHT string cheese i honestly like it way better that the original (50cals)
monsters or any other low cal energy drink(also not a very good choice) (5-20 cals)
cucumbers i rec adding something on top like lemon pepper/juice, Chamoy, tajin or any other low cal topping (10-45 cals)
pita crackers!! another must for me✋i’ve found that i’ve cut out corn chips since i’ve tried pita crackers they’re great for dips or just a side snack(130cals)
(i have lots of more food recommendations if y’all want more!!)
- check your weight daily or a few times a week i find this helps motivate me especially when i eat more than i should and start gaining.
-make sure you’re taking some kind of vitamin/supplement every day!!(you don’t wanna develop any more of a deficiency)
-do something that burns calories like walking, an at home workout, just dance,etc.
-TEA try making a cup of tea instead of feeding into ur hunger pangs
-read!!(one of my personal favs;) distract yourself with a book, especially if you’re a ao3/wp girly🤭(iykyk)
-music🎧 i love listening to music and just scrolling through pinterest or organizing my phone
-SCROLL ON TUBLR(like the last tip ^)
-go outside. you can find a place to sit get some fresh air i like to go out on my trampoline and watch videos/music:)
-hobbies!!!find yourself a hobby i like to distract myself by making kandi bracelets i also like to paint or any other arts and crafts.
-FASTING!! fasting is a major part of my daily life now i fast every day for at least 15-20hr a day
-watch yt,a show, or a movie. i like to distract myself with long forms of media. (i recommend watching some lolcow commentary on yt 💀)
-clean/organize! you can clean or organize things in your room,bathroom,kitchen,etc..
-self care🌟 i recommend taking care the outside of your body<3 (cause girl I know the inside ain’t doing too well😣) if you need motivation or ideas go on TikTok or YouTube watch some sc video:)
-make sure you have a meta day(basically a day for your metabolism where you eat at a normal calorie intake this is to make sure ur metabolism doesn’t crash)
-after a long binge when you decide to restrict again, make sure you do it slowly (restricting your calorie intake too fast can also cause your metabolism to crash)
#3ating d1sorder#tw ana rant#low cal meal#tw ana bløg#tw ed ana#low cal restriction#mealspo#meanspø#tw 3d vent#anor3c1a#tw ed not ed sheeren#tw ana mia#anadiet#i just want to be thin#thinspø#tw skipping meals#3d blog#b0n3sp0#tw edtwt#3d but not sheeren#3d f4st#3d not sheeran#34t1ng d1s0rd3r#3d relapse#3d diary#tw 3d diet#@n@ meal#meal$p0#mealspø#mealsp0
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god i wish that were me,, full pic under da cut lol
아 ㅈㄴ 부끄러워 오빠 얼굴 치워>_<;; 끙-,,
i was listening to arari by lucia its my faveee song by her, her whole niche is period drama ost-sounding music which is right up my alley, i have a whole sageuk vibe playlist for when im drawing madara & sukuna u kno i need to get in THAT ZONE more on that next time maybe ANYWAYS
this vid popped up in the recommendations and it caught my eye cuz 1. i love da moon, obsessed with 🌙 2. what is that thumbnail haa, i clicked on it and well i kno this song!! its part of the chuno ost oooh this drama is sooooo good, not much pretty ~aesthetic~ here cuz its not palace stuff but man this is a classic
but ooh lucia's cover of it is sooo good i love the traditional instruments in the bg, i think the original song was with piano and violin? BUT THE THUMBNAIL LOOOOLL its a webtoon called 'moonrise during the day'
i should try reading webtoons / manhwa some of these kr artists r putting out rly beautiful art idec about the plot tbh im gonna look based on the artstyle only LOL for research & study purposes akjdfnskdfhuvrgf
this looks rly cute tho i love how its drawn stylistically, i could NOT bring myself to do the pointy upturned nose tho, and the big eyes like i rly dont know how to draw big anime eyes anymore💀
i feel like he would have a little bump right at the top of the nosebridge idk it just feels right to me 🤷🏻♀️ i love nose bumps so thats how im gonna draw him lol also im physically pounding dirt with my bare hands rn cuz i want to be in that girls place soooo bad fawkkkkk tbh i wouldnt even mind swapping places w sukuna lmfao i want a pretty pink haired gf///////// so to summarize. 아이고 머리아프군.
#i wonder what hes saying~ maybe.. some shit like. 'pee is stored in the balls' JSSJJJSJSSJAKKQSJJS 🤣#also hes a monolid king...#nose bump sukuna i love u#PPL WHO DONT DRAW MAJIMAS NOSE BUMP IN ARE GOING TO HELL SORRY#anyways the song.... the moon has passed.... so fucking good. sooo good.#i always ramble under my drawings lately lol#my sageuk playlist is so. 💖#alulu art#이 지랄같은 인생#man i missed drawing hanbok ☹️#theres sm artifacts in the bg cuz i played with brillance LOL idc tho
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Guys this sketchbook stuff is pretty fun actually! Have some human versions of my dnd npcs who are usually cats
#the pen on top of highlighter combo is so powerful its destroying my year long artblock#its a good time i recommend trying it out!#in this human au theyre mostly college students since in their normal world theyre cats in a medieval type dnd world#one of them is dead and another one is in jail lmao#but in this au theyre hanging out and friends!#myart#character design#sketchbook
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Cuckootober day 9 - Pavonine cuckoo (Dromococcyx pavoninus)
One of only three of the cuckoos in the Americas who are obligate brood parasites. Unlike some cuckoos, its eggs aren't similar to those of its host. They have a cute ring of purple spots around the center you can see here.
#cuckootober#pavonine cuckoo#birds#birbly#drawing stuff#watercolor#my greatest hubris is thinking I can get a dark bird dark enough in watercolor#i wonder if dark birds are a good time to bust out the colored pencils#to try to dark things... or maybe i just need to commit to multiple layers on these things#hm hm hm. anyway this cuckoo has such a weird shape#highly recommend looking at photos of this one#and its sister the pheasant cuckoo
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Hi!! I love this series so much, and as someone who hasn’t really drawn since they were a kid but wants to start as a hobby, do you have any advice for sort of learning to doodle on paper and get better at it? I want to start but I don’t really know how/where
The most important step in getting better at any skill is Persistence and Consistency. Practice and keep practicing! The best way to do that is to keep it fun! Picking a project helps generate ideas (e.g. drawing Pokémon, or characters from a series you like). There are also a ton of monthly prompt lists out there!
I also highly recommend scheduling in a 'drawing/practice' time in your day. For me, I started with 30-60 min before bed (bonus: its a good 'no screentime' activity), and the habit took root there.
There are a lot of 'technical' things to study but find the fun first. At a certain point you will discover you've hit a wall, and have a specific aspect/goal you want to target (colour theory, anatomy, lighting, comic layout). Then it's time to go looking for resources.
Once you have the habit and some goals, go collect some inspiration! Find people who inspire you and study their work!
Another little 'art skill builder' I recommend is the Shrimp Method! Only if you find technical challenges like this fun though (Example of one of my studies below)
#art faqs#TL;DR: Step 1 is 'Just start drawing'. Step 2 is 'Keep on drawing'. Step 3 is 'Hit a wall and start studying only as much as you want'#Step 4: keep it fun and keep drawing.#I think this is where artists who start young have the advantage over adult learners#because adults try to tackle art at the technical point first!#AND THAT JUST FEELS LIKE A CHORE!!#When I got into piano & string instruments I started by just doodling around. Banging out the tunes and experimenting.#The low pressure made it fun! I started lessons because I wanted to learn more!#I personally own quite a few art textbooks! Some are workbook/prompt-based (to help me get started)#and some are actual textbooks! But I certainly didn't start by reading a textbook.#I *highly* recommend Scott McCloud's 'understanding comics' for anyone trying to get into comics#its also a comic in of itself so its a fun read! It breaks down a lot of the key aspects of what's in a comic.#And tbh you don"t HAVE to trace for the shrimp method to work. Just take the time to do a study of a subject!#Good luck on your art journey! B*)
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Did some lake fishing while visiting with some friends recently. It was a lot of fun!
#got my hot girl fishing license this year lmao!#hoping to check out some local spots sometime too!#yosh#fishing#caught nothing but beginner fish but that's okay! I'm a beginner. we never did catch those bass....#but the long-eared sunny was something i'd never seen before... it was super pretty and super cool!#i recommend looking up pictures the colors are gorgeous I couldn't believe that was a lake fish#I have a pretty funny fishing story about losing my lure too(i think its fun) so all in all a good time!#trying to get back into the drawing habit again... someone yell at me and tell me to draw my comic lol!
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Quick question: what is steeplechase?
basics out of the way first: steeplechase is the latest campaign in the adventure zone, a comedy/adventure tabletop rpg podcast by the McElroy brothers and their dad. griffin, travis and justin are the same ones who do 'my brother, my brother and me' if youve heard any of the clips from that floating around.
its a really fun campaign bc its set in a futuristic theme park that got so huge its basically its own city, with a large criminal underground. the game itself is centred around building rep in the underground and pulling heists in various themed sections of the park (one of them is themed on nostalgia, one of them is themed on detective noirs, one is a love island style dating show).
i think its nearing the end of the run now, most of the eps are out already and ive really enjoyed it! the setting is fantastic, the player characters are some of my faves and the npcs are all memorable. id actually recommend it to anyone who enjoys that sort of genre
#i dont like feeling like im pressureing ppl to watch/listen to stuff so im not gonna say GO GO GO LISTEN#but if you or anyone else likes that kind of setting and genre id give it a try#although if im being 100% real id say if its your first time listening to /any/ adventure zone campaigns ever then id say there are better-#-ones to start off with than steeplechase#not bc steeplechase is bad but bc steeplechase is the first time justin has ever dm'd#and he definitely finds his feet pretty damn fast but i also think the first episode setup for taz amnesty or taz earthsea goes a bit-#-smoother for a first time listener#if anyone out there is looking to get into the adventure zone as a whole id recommend starting with either amnesty or the original balance-#- arc which is a little messier but it /is/ where it all started and its still very good#taz#tazs#taz steeplechase
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there are two wolves inside of you. One of them is fretting that you went through all the effort of making a new art account just to pigeonhole yourself once more into a specific fandom, which holds you back from exploring original art concepts that you care about. The other one came up with three separate ace attorney comic ideas in the last hour alone and isn't stopping anytime soon
#laurellala talks#am i unwell? perhaps#i also drew like 5 more sketchy comics i haven't posted#and a full colored drawing i haven't posted bc i'm overthinking if i need to attach comics to it also or post on its own#i want to draw more muppets interactions and come up with an actual theoretical muppets ace attorney case!#they would get to explore the muppet studio as a location aaa it would be so cuteee#and i'm in the middle of drawing a comic of miles and nick video calling and teasing a young trucy (i love trucy)#and i NEED to draw nick and maya interactions from trials and tribulations case 3 it's so sibling coded agh my heart#also i want to draw lisa basil in general the roboty software company lady#i want to design an ace attorney self insert called Laurel Lyre (you're a liar) and draw sprite expressions and character interactions#she would be an art student that Nick knew from college and she was painting a still life of the scene of the crime#and her painting has something different than how the crime scene looked which is used as proof in court#ALSOOO i had an idea for a silly comic of nick visiting miles in germany (platonic coded)#and of either a comic or short story idea of them going out to dinner together. This one is hard to explain but it would be good#I WANT TO DRAW FRANZISKA TOO i have an angst comic idea for her! And i want to draw her as a kid in dance class#i feel like she has so much scrutiny of herself which is very “i was in dance as a kid” coded. Ballet probably#I ALSO have a comic idea of a holiday party that took place before miles' murder trial but after steel samurai case#where miles begrudgingly talks to phoenix to avoid small talk with strangers and they talk about college#specifically like. it is canon to me that phoenix was in an improv group in college. That's where he learned to bluff. he's so silly#i also want to make a comic of the parents at trucy's school trying to sus out how old nick is#since he's only like what 17 years older than her?#I also want to make a gilmore girls joke but i can't tell if this is too dated to be funny. Do people know this show still#i had never watched it before so i just watched like half a season of it just to make a joke. It's cute.#What Else. I have like 5 animatic ideas but i need to ask my friend what she uses to make hers bc in the past I've used imovie on my phone#do not recommend#and if i don't draw everything RIGHT NOW i'm going to lose interest and nothing will get made!!!!!!#andandand I STILL NEED TO FINISH TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONSSSSS#i got sooo far i'm doing so well in the waitress case#i need to finish it so i can finally understand apollo justice and know what the HECK happened in that time skip#ace attorney
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lol. i think ive reached my limit.
#i just cannot take this torture anymore#ive been at the mercy of this horrible disease for over half my life now#imagine living knowing that roughly every 3.5 weeks youre going to experience the most excruciating pain of your life#along with crushing. usually suicidal depression. and such extreme fatigue and exhaustion that you easily sleep for 14+ hours a DAY#AND ITS ALL FOR FUCKING *NOTHING*#there is literally ZERO benefit or reason for me to be experiencing this#it is 100% extraneous#and even if you go to a dr and try to get treatment their only recommendation is 1) pain killers and/or 2) birth control#which both come with their own fucking share of unpleasant side effects#not to mention theyre not even 100% effective at stopping the problem in the first FUCKING place#and imagine even tho you have this DEBILITATING DISORDER society at large has decided it straight up DOESNT EXIST#to the point where REAL ACTUAL MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS will dismiss your symptoms#not to mention people in your life who dont understand or just straight up dont believe your disorder is real#good luck keeping a job or any other major commitments#considering you'll either be out of commission for like. 1 out of ever 4 weeks#or youll have to work/whatever WHILE experiencing said excruciating pain/crushing depression/debilitating exhaustion#not to mention the GI issues and the migraines and the brain fog and the fucking. full body aches#wanna go to a concert? or plan a vacation? or just. fucking. RELAX? you better hope its not during Hell Week or youre outta luck#and youve got roughly 30-40 YEARS of this to look forward to#maybe less IF YOURE LUCKY#im fucking over it#i cant take it anymore#im making an appt to see a dr and i WILL NOT LEAVE THEIR OFFICE until they have referred me to whoever i have to talk to to make this stop#my fucking fury at having to live like this has officially outweighed my fear of invasive procedures/recovery time/side effects#let along the torture that is navigating the medical care system as an AFAB#i just. i cant do this anymore.#i want to fucking LIVE#fuck
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ok let's catch up quickly
#so i went on a few dates w this guy. long hair beautiful face kinda looked like a girl (good) said yes ma'am when i told him to do smth#(also good) film student great at photography including candids. made a sheath of leather for a sword pin i have . et cetera.#he asked to cuddle and i was like iggg and then i felt Nothing and i was like ohhh yh ok ok yep lesbian#like he meets almost all my criteria but. yeahhh no . also at the end of that date he had some weird takes. anyway broke up w him and told#him actually im p sure im a lesbian (again) and he was like yk thats the second time this has happened to me this week but its ok bc ive#fallen for this girl from berlin. and then we cooked together. anyway . met a beautiful butch lowk in love w her. weve been on (1) date.#have two exams in a few days havent studied enough going to like end it all basically. my research partner kicked me off our research#(expected(it was always skinda sketchy)) which was devastating + it happened in a lidl 15 hours into a journey from bordeaux#to go back to the UK. my friends were kinda busy paying for baguettes but also they heard this whole exchange and are kinda mad at him#my friend of 10+ years is coming over in a few days. my evil ex situationship person that i decided to stay friends w because i kept#insisting they are a good friend and not evil and also extremely beautiful? turns out shockingly enough they were evil. tried to fix them#and then i realised due to their entire friendship group being ppl like me (Every Single One of their friends are ppl they met on dating#apps then led on then dumped and proposed staying friends w) and are collectively extremely attracted to them and not over them they#keep validating the most diabolical shit they say/do to hace a chance w them. they broke up w their ex and the way they keep leading#this poor girl on and making her heartbeeak worse and saying that they want more power over her and want her to beg for them back etc...MY#JAW HAD DROPPED esp bc i didnt even know the ex was in the picture BECAUSE ME AND ONE OF OUR FRIENDS (that they also dated) HAD JUSR SLEPT#NAKED TOGETHER IN THEIR BED W THEM. GIRL. anyway that is the least of the diabolical stuff they said but no we are moving onnn#this was b4 the beautiful butch btw. anyways . i have a mitski concert tmrw i think?? idek anymore#i used to have a crush on this guy very briefly and then it disappeared and then i realised if he fundementally changed everything abt#himself then maybe id like him but ofc i didnt tell him that but i still think abt it sometimes but anyway thats irrelevant now bc 99% sure#even if he did id still not find him attractive (lesbianism). please recommend good overnight moisturisers btw i have super dry skin#right. the friend of 10 yrs. we had a hard convo abt why she essentially bullied me in year 8 and it made me highly bitter but i also love#her and ik things are diff now its been like . Many Years . and shes going to stay a while I HAVE TWO EXAMS I DONT HAVE TIME but i love her#its fine. i think i might just switch into medicine and do the whole become a neurosurgeon thing (which was my plan B) bc plan A is looking#kinda impossible rn. I WANNA TALK MORE ABT WHAT THE EX SITUATIONSHIP PERSON SAID but i wont bc i dont wanna be too mean but also . MY GOD#i had a conversation w a philosopher friend about whether i have a moral responsibility to try to fix them bc unleashing this on society#feels wrong and he said 'probably but...run' so yeah im not talking to them atm. second date w beautiful butch on monday btw IDK WHAT TO#WEAR. she said she likes fems. im just gonna wear the shortest ralph lauren skirt i have w the cute leg warmers and hope 4 the best#its 1:15 AM im abt to drink coffee and start studying bc what the FUCK man. also almost finished watching the boys its very good#one of my best friends is struggling rn it is breaking my heart i want to take the burden from her i miss her very much
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#T's “what did u call me? do u think whatever that is is hot? okay then good”#i love the tour pic above K!#and i love how they r still plucked abt not being in Dune2#K the avid winker...#its so cute how T is featured on this album of K's too😭😭😭#T wants to be left alone (on the phone) on her bday and K wants attention... well... ((once again relating to K))#T looked at Ks belly in a suprisingly like? soft way? idk i might have hallucinated that but who knows.#fuck whoever didnt visit K when she would have wanted them to.#its sweet how T visited her! (srsly cant u just communicate who wants what in this situation so its no suprise? ik its hard for them but😭)#T describing Ks party attending habits!!! they know each other soooo well🤭#aaagh how they have to act like they cant easily spend 2 hrs together having fun when they literally cant wipe the smiles off of their faces#(lesbians..... lovesick idiots.......)#oh they r always facetiming! so adorable :(#T was so excited that they r linked! like girl u do not need more confirmation for that research do u?😭#K watching the pod...... my heart......#why dont they just sit closer if they will reach across a whole fucking room to touch eachother?? like it sounds easier for me but u do u!#i really get a kick out of K mentioning TRHPS anytime she does it bc ik it was such a big thing in Ts life and ugh😭#constantly praising each other😭😭😭😭😭 what if i start sobbing huh#well maybe T is trying to get K to learn how to flirt so that she can practice on her? just an idea?😁#K putting her leg up on T?????? hi what? jist sit in the other's lap u creatures... its okay we can all look away for a sec if u need it...#their art! i fucking love it! both of it! its art at its finest🛐 and id kill to see a collection of their drawings bc cmon they r amazing!#its cute how they r talking abt smth and then they go “oh wait we were there together!”#its almost as if they actually spend time hanging out😱 (dont let the police know!!4!4)#“if we were on DR now-” okay but why r u still dreaming of that miss T?🤭🤭🤭 (who could blame her)#them watching the movies the other one recommends is the closest we can get to them watching an actual thing together (outside of NF)#also im so happy T spent time w K on her bday :(((#trixie mattel#katya zamo#tbatb#the brians
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Every algorithm online thinks i'm a 15 year old lesbian, except for spotify which thinks i am someone who listens to nothing but songs who's lyrics are 90% jizz and spunk
#jay talkin#spotify slamming a song down in its recommends like E'RE Y'GO FILTHY LITTLE FUCK. YOU LIKE SPUNK AND ALCOHOL AND PUBLIC SEX AN SMELLING BAD#and i go THANK FUCK THE ONE ALGORITH THAT DOESNT THINK IM A TWEE TEEN GIRL#no i dont always like the songs in my discover weekly but im just glad of the change of fucking pase tbh#actually a lot of what i've been listening to lately inst along these lines at all. ive been seeking out a lot of newer artists i hadnt#heard of before. having a good time w it! been on a joey valence and brae kick and a hyphen kick#and been trying to seek out more furry artists too. had ashley ninelives russel buck and pent up pup on latelyyyy#i have a LOT more artists to check out tho theres so many talented ppl out there for reallll#the thing of every algorithm thinking im a lesbian woman does make me feel dysphoric tbh but we aint talking bout that rn#something something feeling so alone cuz nowhere feels made for you as a gay trans man something something whatev
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my niece stayed with us last night. it was pretty fun this time, probably because I was feeling better (if I'm already in pain or exhausted, I can't handle it). after we dropped her off, we talked to my mother for a little bit, and then drove to my in-laws. we were there for a few hours and because the guys were busy outside, i ended up talking to my mother-in-law for most of that time. it was... kind of good? I don't know. she actually showed some real emotions, just a little bit, but hey that's more than ever before! I even gave her a weird little shoulder squeeze/side hug, it was so weird.
anyway, I almost fell asleep in the car on the way home because I was so tired, and actually did fall asleep immediately on the couch.
#it's pretty annoying because my mother-in-law of course asked me how applying for jobs is going. I haven't applied for a single one yet#bc dude I can barely get through the day. I sleep for 12-16 hours a day. and I'm almost always in some kind of pain. and I'm not doing so#good mentally either. come on! I interacted with a handful of people in one day and had to sleep for like 6 hours.#anyway so I said it's a bit difficult because I'm constantly tired - it felt like the only thing she might kind of understand?#annnd she said its probably a vitamin D deficiency and I should get that tested (I won't because I'd have to pay for that and also I think I#read that taking vitamin D supplements doesn't actually help? I can't remember now and I don't want to look it up bc I know it definitely is#not the only or even main reason I am always tired.#I took vitamin D tablets for several months last year (?) bc my previous GP recommended it and. it did absolutely nothing at all#plus. like. I can't sleep. I sleep like shit. always. so. idk? that definitely doesn't help#and I sleep more when I'm in pain and all that too. so.#and she knows I have a bunch of health issues but. nope it's vitamin D because that's one thing and it's simple and here take a pill you're#fine now! wait why aren't you fine now? oh I guess you're just lazy 🙄#< that's 100% how that would go#ugh. Just let me sleep for 5-10 years. maybe that'd fix me....#like. I'm trying to get myself back (?) to being an actual human person again. I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with me. I'm trying to#live and not feel like I'm drowning every fucking day#finding a job is only gonna add more stress and exhaustion and everything. if I want to try to help myself this is the time to do it#okay rant over I'm going to sleep now#personal
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( T_T)\(^-^ )
#vent(?) ->#ive been wearing bracelets more lately and its making me feel a bit happier#looking down on my arms and seeing cute stuff instead of sh is sort of comforting#and whenever the bracelets have words that i love on them it just makes me feel so happy. i get reminded of the things i love#im putting this in tags instead of in the actual post because i still feel sort of bad talking about this kind of thing#even though i know its okay to..#i think i recommend this if looking at your arms scare you for any reason#im very scared if my arms and hands but if theres cute stuff on it i feel a bit better i think#thats why i draw on my hands and arms too. i put smiley faces on them and i put lain on them so i can always see things that i like#i am not even that good at making bracelets but its been making me feel so happy lately#not even just for myself but for my friends too.. it seems to make them happy :3#i love happiness!!! i love smiling i want to get better. i want to get better SO much even if i dont always feel like i do#i have time to get better even if it feels like everything could end at any second. im going to try and take my time#and try to become a happy person#so i can make other people happy too. i dont know what the point of this post is#i just want somebody out there to know im trying. im sorry
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My number one loser behaviour is hate-watching this one fuckass sims youtuber until I get so angry that I have to turn it off before the adrenaline makes me pull an all-nighter
#i feel like i shouldnt say who it is but if you have a sims youtuber nemesis PLS tell me who#bc if we have the same one we have to kiss with tounge <3#i realise this is rich coming from ME but the reason i hate her is that shes just so disturbingly negative all the time#ALL. THE. TIME.#when you start noticing it youll drive yourself crazy watching her videos#bc i swear every other minute there will be something she complains about#if i took a shot every time she complained in a video id be passed out by the 5 minute mark#there is an easy solution to this you say- stop watching her#and yes. i do avoid watching for the most part but shes like the most popular sims ytber and her videos get recommended#plus i guess i like the hate watching in small doses#plus some days when im in a good mood i can ignore it#plus she actually makes decent videos despite her personality (shes legit a good person too she just annoys me on a spiritual level)#i need someone who is a sims loser like me to bitch with in the most useless hater way possible !!!#ALSO i realise the irony of me complaining abt her complaining !! i get it. the whole thing is dumb ! and yet here i am... still pissed off#me abt x > let me say im the biggest hater. i hate the way that you walk the way that you talk the way that you dress.. etc ect.#actually why am i trying to explain myself in these tags 💀 who caresssss its the sims omg#but yeah i hate her fr i think#on my hitlist. its on sight
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