#it's been a day friends
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I was just "lightly" going off in the tags of a gorgeous gif set about how much I love Sang Yan's bravery, but I have more to say that can't be contained in the tags. I still don't know if I can fully express my thoughts and feelings about this masterpiece of a show, but something that I can at least articulate is why I love Sang Yan as a character so much. To me, he truly is the most perfect example of "Do It Scared". This boy has never gotten over the heartbreak he suffered that fateful night in the rain in Beiyu. He has never let go of the girl he was in love with. Never, not in all these many years. And we see it in everything he does. Everything. In every terrible excuse of nonchalance or contrived situation of incredible kindness. In every step he takes towards her instead of back for his self preservation. Every instance of him trying to be cool, only for it to be so blatantly obvious he is expressing his care. Maybe in a tentative way, but boy is scared. It's obvious in the way he is still the quiet, serious boy he was back then, but he still moves in with her after losing his home. He doesn't run after her, but he buys extra food and furniture and makes their home cozy and kind and safe for her. We see it in the way he has never gotten close to another girl. In how it's mentioned more than once that his best friends never get close enough to know him intimately. But he lets her see him vulnerable in bits and pieces, and he gets to see her in return. We see it in the entire existence of Overtime as a concept, especially now that we know it was her dream to have this safe space to unwind. It's in the way he quietly and vulnerably entreats her sleeping self to reach out a hand first - to reach out more obviously - because he doesn't know if he can put himself out there again to be hurt because he is still nursing those years old wounds. And yet, in spite of his fear, we see he still buys the ticket to see her in Beiyu before she is finally brave for him. Once again offering her his heart. He loved her years ago, and has loved her all along, quietly and removed, with no pressure of reciprocation. For better or worse, fear or not, he is the epitome of someone who loves and loves and loves.
#the first frost#sang yan#难哄#cdrama#bai jingting#it's been a day friends#and i just needed to get this out#does it make sense??#maybe maybe not#but i stand by it#thanks fys for chatting about it with me#tldr don't call someone a loser for being in love#because I have seen it going around when talking about his character
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This might be the last time we see Tom Hardy Venom on screen so I just wanna say, from the bottom of my monster fucker heart, it has been an absolute pleasure to go through this series with you all these last 6 years.

#venom#venom 2018#eddie brock#anne weying#venom the last dance#mrs chen#Tom Hardy#you will always be iconic to me#and I will remember you so fondly forever#symbrock#venom let there be carnage#let there be carnage#I’m in shambles#I’ve been crying all day#I’ve had so many experiences because of these movies#I have one of my very best friends in the world because of this series#and I will cry so so hard during this film
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i love that i read SO many jayvik fics about the divorce beginning with jayce being horrified at what viktor had done with the hexcore, only for it to turn out that jayce actually did not give a SINGLE fuck, didn't even flinch at the sight of his hand and leg, and was ecstatic when it ended up saving his life. i am absolutely obsessed
#jayvik#arcane#arcane spoilers#idk if i was ever certain how jayce would react but i do love pain and i knew the divorce had to come some time#his best friend is ALIVE and they're going to fix everything together and oh he must be cold 'let me grab my blanket i have in here'#'i've been sleeping in this room for days waiting for a sign of life and here he is'#AHHHHHHHHHHHH#anyway. i missed them
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Stobotnik whiteboard doodles
#stobotnik#sighhhh#i draw#have been drawing on whiteboard for like 5 days straight w my friend havent even touched my actual art program lol
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typical tavern scene
#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhjy#fabian seacaster#riz gukgak#adaine abernant#kristen applebees#figueroth faeth#gorgug thistlespring#got my version of this in lol. I feel like this is mandatory if u draw fh art#trying to remember whats on the menu at a typical swensen's. its been years since I last was at one#tho I am so absolutely unfamiliar with like elmville level of town scenery. just immediately drew from my own experience lmao#I used to think malls are the same everywhere.... but then I hear from my US friends and. wow they sure are not#mm. good day to reminisce a little bit. but I am now sleepy#not a lot to say abt this I think most of this is pretty straightforward. I did use this to test out some overlays in SAI2#that I never really touched. the talisman on fig's guitar case takes from the house protection talisman you'd put on the front door#and also I think kristen slipping while fully sat down is very funny and special. she means so much to me#okay. alright. I should really go to sleep. and tomorrow I should take my dang walk... see the sun#have a good night lads! enjoy ice cream
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if i think about the hunger games in peeta's perspective i WILL start sobbing
#imagine you're a boy who's going to die. you're in love with the girl you've been watching from afar. you know your fate.#you just want to help her‚ but then there's the announcement and she's here in front of you‚ kissing you‚ risking her life for you and you#think‚ i could live and i could love. you think she loves you when she hands you the berries‚ when she puts them in her mouth.#then you both survive and you go back home and nothing is real anymore. you have nothing. no family. no friends. no love. just an empty#house. a drunk for a neighbor. the love of your life walking into somebody else's arms. you think‚ i survived the games. i could survive#this. and you also think‚ i should've bit down on those berries‚ should've felt the juice burst before i died.#and then the third quarter quell announcement rings in your ears and you think‚ she will live and i will die as i should have in the first#place. the girl you love kisses you on the beach and somewhere you heart stirs and your mind revolts and you savor every touch she has ever#given to you‚ in front of the cameras and off. because you are a tribute and you are always being watched and snow's presence looms and#you think‚ i know she cares. but you get taken. you get drugged. you get tortured‚ your mind altered. the girl is a mutt‚ a murderer. she's#everything you despise‚ your mind stirs. your heart revolts. you gain more awareness but cannot distinguish reality from fiction and you#have never known katniss' love. the war ends. you heal. you come home. you plant primrose for her. years down the line‚ you grow in love#more than you thought possible. but some days‚ you cannot tell fiction from reality so you ask the love of your life‚ you love me.#real or not real? and she says‚ real‚ and kisses you.#and you sigh and kiss her back and revel in this. a home. a life. a love.#lit#the hunger games#everlark#otp: real or not real?#katniss everdeen#peeta mellark#text#tais toi lys#thgpost#*
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#good omens#´hello friends!! how are you!!#I hope you're doing well! ( ´ ▽ ` )#I have a big cough but otherwise I am good! It's nothign bad I am just very slimey#usually I am not a cough person I am not sure where this is coming from#most of the time I just get a stuffy nose#has my nose gotten stronger#but there are good news too I have already found a VERY good chestnut to put into my pocket this autumn!! its very small! (❁´▽`❁)#it's been a very warm autumn in Germany so far so it has not really felt like fall yet#but yesterday it was all rainy and stormy and I had two new books and it was the best day possible to have a slimey cough (:#and now I feel SO much autumn I am close to buying a set of window colors#I do not know what I would to with the window colors I just have this strong urge in me to buy a window color set#the last time I did a window color was at the birtday of a class mate I think she turned 9 and I made a deer#but for some reason we did this craft 5 minutes before we all had to leave so we had to carry our window color deer home wet#unfortunatly for the deer and me I fell down the stairs of her house and smeared the deer all over me and i screamed the entire drive home#which wasn't very long but it probably felt very long for the mother who had a screaming child covered in window color deer inside her car
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disabled/chronically ill people in general do not have the same number of usable hours as ableds. i can't meet my friend tomorrow because i need to wash my hair, and i can't meet them the day after because i need to do a load of laundry. i can't meet them thursday because i have an important appointment on friday, and if i overdo it on thursday i'll have to cancel friday's appointment. then i can't meet them on saturday because i'll be recovering from going out on friday, if i even manage to make it out the house. the old 'we all have the same 24 hours in the day' saying does not apply to us.
#brought to you by a disabled girlie who has been trying to make plans w/ a friend for weeks and is getting increasingly frustrated about it#if this doesn't apply keep scrolling but if anyone tries any variation on 'as if it takes you the whole day to wash your hair' it's on sigh#.txt#disabled#spoonie#chronically ill#chronic pain
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the sunshine court really put the original trilogy in a new light bc we finally see just. regular college students. they go to get boba. they have a cute gay apartment. they actually go to classes. and then we have jean, neil, andrew, kevin, and the rest of the foxes who are just Not Having a Normal Time between unresolved oodles of trauma, not a single stable home life in sight, oh also and the literal mafia. — their metric for being Okay is just,,, not helpful. but trying to picture jean just like— in my econ section. hanging out at someone’s bday party on a saturday in socal. my man holding a corona and having no idea what to do with his hands. i cannot.
#it’s insane#i hadn’t realize how much my threshold for normal had been raised until cat and laila showed up#and i was like holy shit#they could be my friends at uni#anyway#i need to go read more jerejean fluff#all for the game#all for the gays#nora sakavic#jean moreau#neil josten#jeremy knox#the sunshine court#tsc#aftg headcanon#aftg#aftg tsc#tfc#the foxhole court#kevin day#jerejean#andrew minyard#the foxes
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i like the swords a lot
#im.back mononoke#haiii hiiii i missed you mononoke n i def didnt start a rewatch of the entire thing#ive only been in the mood for meme redraws lately tho 😭#...big things coming. crossing my fingers i finish this next one cus i love the idea#mononoke#mononoke karakasa#kon kusuriuri#my art#none of my friends r mononoke fans im so lonely 💔 my brother isnt either 💔 one day i will sit them down for a mononoke viewing#im rambling alone in the discord server abt shit only i care n know abt RAGHH#anyways the swords are genuinely so adorable im so obsessed. huge little guy energy on them
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Harmony Syndrome Part 5/5
The last chapter of my mlp infection AU! Thank you to everyone who followed along. Some final thoughts on my twitter @cracklewink if anyone's interested : )
#mlp#my little pony#mlp infection au#mlp infection#twilight sparkle#Sorry for leaving the ending open ended but I genuinely couldnt decide on just one way for things to turn out and I liked the idea of#leaving it open the most#in my mind sunset's final message is like we found a recording from the later days of the infection and we dont know what happened in the#end because the recordings stopped/ended#In any case I think they were able to put twilight and the others to rest#but who knows who survived the “final battle” and who didnt#also yes Twilight created harmony syndrome but not on purpose lol#it was the result of her botched attempt to create a spell that makes ponies immortal#obviously it backfired lol#and the irony is that twilight ends up dying before any of her friends#if they didnt want me writing my little pony horse tragedy they shouldnt have left mlpfim off on the note that all of twilight's friends#were growing old without her#ending thats been haunting me for five years#if anyones seeing this this is an open au btw so feel free to adopt any of the ideas if you like! : )#tw thanatophobia#thanatophobia
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friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me
#It’s just so different#even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol#in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps#if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it#esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends#no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr#u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS#meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life#this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation#like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !!#& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers#who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them#and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends#it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me#I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc#like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this#so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works#p
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Nobody’s gonna buy ur 599$ marketable plushie stop tryna sell it to us -_-
#black butler#kuroshitsuji#black butler fanart#undertaker black butler#undertaker#ciel phantomhive#sebastian michaelis#o!ciel#this was a joke post but then I was like what if I attempt a background again#it looks crusty but if u squint from afar it’s ok#the day I fully render a piece is the day I get to retire but I’m like. too lazy#just sketches with colors slapped on top#my friend taught me how to use the perspective tool and I’ve been messing with it but I am -_- lacking in knowledge#though ill mostly likely practice drawing more backgrounds now that I know how it Works
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GIRLS NITE OUT >_< ((clockwork could not make it)) (wip)
#myart#idk what he’s doing here#this is a work in progress#but I’m gonna be on some island for four days so I wanted to post before I left#Ej is just there for the food#I think Jane and Nina + Ej could be a good friend group actually#very balanced#I hope Jane knows I have a Lamborghini ready for her#creepypasta#eyeless jack#jane the killer#nina the killer#jeff the killer#crp#horror#slenderman#ej#jtk#this is really half assed I’m going to be 100% honest#nobody reading this but the support on my store has been so nice and I love you all#ok bye <3#why is this preforming well#I want 2 delete this so bad 💀
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Homer!Odysseus and Epic!Odysseus would try to kill each other if they ever met
#Homer!Odysseus: you sacrificed your men to save yourself? Detestable coward! How I wish I was never born if it would ensure you had not the#Epic!Odysseus: you’d understand if you *loved your wife.* But I guess a guy who stayed with Circe for a year wouldn’t know that!#H!Odysseus: do not speak of things you know nothing about! I long for my return to sweet Penelope but I have a duty to my men#E!Odysseus: A YEAR. A WHOLE YEAR. I WOULD KILL ANYTHING AND ANYONE TO GET A HOME A YEAR FASTER#H!Odysseus: that was clear when you served Scylla six men like they were cattle!#E!Odysseus: it was them or me! And don’t keep talking about my friends like you did any better. you’ll go home alone too#H!Odysseus: they doomed themselves when they ate Hyperion’s golden cattle. I am not responsible for their suffering. But you could have ens#H!Odysseus: Now Eurylochus’s body lies at the bottom of the sea where there can be no burial and no honour#E!Odysseus: AND I’LL GO HOME TO MY WIFE. MY BEAUTIFUL PERFECT LOVELY LOYAL WIFE WHO’S BEEN WAITING FOR ME FOR TWENTY YEARS.#E!Odysseus: and when I go home and she asks if I came back as fast as I could I’ll be able to answer honestly#H!Odysseus: WE HAD BEEN THROUGH MANY TRIALS. THE MEN NEEDED TO REST#E!Odysseus: FOR A YEAR???? DID THEY NEED TO REST FOR A YEAR??? AND DID THEY NEED THAT REST RIGHT AFTER A MONTH’S LONG REST WITH AEOLUS??? S#H!Odysseus: IF YOU WISHED FOR ITHACA SO DESPERATELY WHY DIDN’T YOU OBEY PALLAS ATHENA AND KILL THE CYCLOPS#E!Odysseus: *drawing sword* I WAS HAVING A ROUGH DAY#Epic the musical#Epic odysseus#The odyssey#odysseus#Homer#Greek mythology#Jorge rivera-herrans#nuclear war speaks
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sorry i stopped posting, i got medicated and also engaged
#also i work 6 days a week and am in grad school#in case you ever wondered what happened to that person you used to follow#people on twitter thought i was dead#not dead! just happy#turns out i’m someone who needs to live a mostly offline life#highly recommend!!#not art#probably my last post ever so see ya#my fiance is a really great person they’ve been my best friend for twice as long as we’ve been together#they’re very private but i’m obsessed with them#really recommend finding someone who makes you incredibly happy#genuinely hope everyone is doing well!! or as well as you can be haha
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