#it's also rambly so hopefully it makes sense

[icarianbeast]

I just finished the first chapter of Deltarune...

First thing's first, amazing game, obviously.

Second thing, though, I feel like the whole universe is kinda really sad? I know in Undertale everyone was trapped underground and that sucks but they all had each other, you know? When I was walking around town after the main story (Which by the way, I KNOW I missed so many hidden secrets- and I never got to go back for what I assume is Jevil (?) because I progressed too far on accident but that's a completely different rant) I talked to everyone that I could and like-

The first thing that got me is that Undyne has no idea who Alphys is. I mean, it makes sense- when would they ever have interacted, in this version of the universe? But still, it made me sad. Then I saw Gerson's grave in the cemetery and that actually made me tear up for some reason. I dunno I guess I thought he'd live forever.

It was fun to see Sans- and hear bones trousling in the house, even if I didn't get to talk to Papyrus- I did promise to visit tomorrow (chapter 2, assumedly?) so hopefully I can meet him then. They seem to be doing just fine- good for them.

But Bratty and Catty hate each other?? I mean, probably not actually hate, but they have a rivalry. Maybe it'll blossom into their friendship they had in Undertale later, but it was sad to me to see them disliking each other.

No sign of Napstablook. I thought the ghost house would be theirs, but it seems like it was Mettaton in there... in whatever form they might have taken in this world. One of the books in the library did seem to be Napstablook's journal though, maybe? And I recall some dialogue or flavor text at some point outside of that that was reminicent of them.

Obviously Asgore and Toriel are divorced- that seems to be consistent across universes. It does make me wonder what happened here though. Also, his initial dialogue being the same as his first dialogue in Undertale totally got me. Also the colored flowers? It seems like maybe they're the ones he & Toriel had at their wedding. Cool parallels though.

Anyway, this is just a ramble, mostly for me, to talk about things I noticed. I had a really good time playing through and reading everything! I did the whole chapter in one sitting... Which probably wasn't my wisest choice, but, hey, what're you gonna do, right? I feel like there's never really a good spot to leave these games (meaning, Undertale & Deltarune), even though there's save points. It never really feels like a good time to log off for the day.

[midnight--sadness]

you are so right about everything!!! thanks so much for replying to that and sharing your opinions. i love that you are very levelheaded about the show but also like to enjoy fanon. :)

I get so mad when people say Jun-ho ruined everything/ was a bad person for not telling Gi-hun about In-ho being the frontman. Thats his brother! That is his big brother who he doesn’t know what will happen to if Gi-hun finds him. He doesn’t know what Gi-huns reaction to that information would be or how the other people in charge of the games will react if someone were to expose his brother’s identity.

And god the theories, accusations, and comparisons of Gi-hun being a new frontman/becoming evil really disappoint me. Maybe I am just in denial about my favorite character, but i just dont see that happening. He is supposed to be the character the audience roots for and his actions are meant to be seen as how they would want to react in a situation like this. (for the most part) I just think the approach of making Hi-hun just like In-ho is lousy and not satisfying at all. I think squid game might give us a more satisfying ending for gi-hun even if that means his death.

Gi-hun certainly is not perfect. no character is and i will always admit that, but the way some people react about these two? crazy

and i don’t want to be more of a d-rider than i already am when it comes to gi hun, but the way people act about him not getting on the plane is ridiculous. how do people expect him to lead a normal life after all that had happened plus him figuring out it will all continue and happen to more people?? also lets not mention how he probably doesn’t feel like he will be an adequate enough father with all his trauma and flaws. AND!!! would you go to see your daughter after knowing these psychos have been tracking you? that would risk her life if they ever wanted someone to use against you? (which they very much would do. ive seen theories that jung bae was placed in the games not just by coincidence)

These two characters are good men and we can’t forget what causes them to make these decisions or the fact that they are meant to have flaws!!! It’s infuriating how they are treated compared to actual villains.

also i would like to see in ho not be forgiven as well. if there is some kind of redemption for him, i hope we still see people he’s hurt so badly be angry (which i dont think will be depicted as a real redemption, just him making a good decision) i agree that jun ho may be more forgiving, but gi hun deserves to be infuriated with what happened to him. seriously in ho didnt have to go as far as he did with gi hun. luckily i dont see him ever doing that because he has no reason to. he was never close to in ho, only young il. he can come back with a lot of heat and vengeance if someone does what in ho has done. (re: gi hun trying to attack sang woo after he killed sae byeok)

this is way too long, im sorry. im just passionate about these characters and their dynamics with in ho. i hope you dont mind my ramblings and i dont feel like looking over it so hopefully they make sense. i really appreciate you talking about this with me!

i so glad u liked what i had to say!! i'm very protective of gihun so my instinct is always to say that he's innocent and does no wrong but in real life people make mistakes. also pls never apologize abt rambling in my inbox i love it so much!! 💖💖 i'm really liking talking to you too!!!

about junho not telling gihun, i once made a post wondering what junho's endgame was. if gihun and his team was successful, then that entire ordeal at the club was to kidnap inho. eventually, gihun was going to remove inho's mask and junho would have to tell him that inho was his brother. gihun finding out was inevitable, so i think junho didn't do it because, like u say, he didn't know what gihun's game plan for inho was. he probably assumed gihun was going to kill him since gihun pointed a gun at junho just bc junho said he was at the island during the games.

yeah, him being front man would be disappointing. in general i have no faith in the writers of shows, but director hwang seems to have a good head on his shoulders and in s1 the fact that gihun "won" that battle with ilnam i think is a good indicator that director hwang is trying to say that gihun is in the right in this situation and he won't abandon his ideals even if he has suffered for them.

the plane thing 😑 it is so irritating!!! why would gihun get on that plane? to see his daughter who is safe with her mother in another continent? so that gayeong can forgive him? gihun is too selfless to let 400+ die for his own safety and comfort.

and omg, that theory abt jungbae is so good! i'd never thought abt it but them placing jungbae would ensure inho has someone close to gihun that he can kill if gihun steps out of line (which he did). it's like how he combed his hair to look like sangwoo's so he could appeal to gihun's love for him.

i completely agree with you that inho isn't going to be fully redeemed. he'll make a good decision - maybe he'll sacrifice himself to save junho or gihun, or he'll decide to abandon the games so the players can escape, or he'll stay behind to blow up the island while every leaves (the last theory is kinda valid but i have to rewatch s1 to see what they say exactly abt the explosives).

i think junho is actually getting closer to not necessarily forgiving junho but accepting his fate? i was remembering his talk with his mother, about how inho made his own choices regarding taking money from a criminal to pay his wife's treatment. and he tells his mom that it wasn't her fault for not giving inho attention or for not trying to help him. he knew they were there and he never went to them. i think junho is, subtextually, saying that they aren't to able for inho becoming the front man, that he made his own choices on the matter and that nothing junho did would change his mind.

this is something that gihun will also have to learn. he can't help those who don't want to help themselves. i can see gihun at first trying to redeem inho, to get him help by appealing to his humanity and this failing. this would confirm to gihun that inho is without "salvation". he's not the devil but he's made so many mistakes, so many bad decisions, that gihun can't help him even he wants to.

[l-1-z-a]

Updates info from April Black:

Hello old and new Sims 2 players! This video got WAY more traction than I was anticipating, and I got a lot of valid points & questions in the comments, so I thought I'd write a pinned comment to hopefully clear some things up.

The main point of this video was two-fold. Firstly, I wanted to stress out that the reported issues with save file corruption in the Legacy Collection are due to a newly introduced bug, and that doesn't mean that all of the info in my Technical Deep Dive is now outdated - and definitely it doesn't mean that old myths such as "deleting Sims causes corruption" are now valid! Secondly, I thought that it's important to talk about the issues that people have encountered, even if they have been fixed by recent patches. If I had my save file corrupted, I'd definitely want to know why! I also decided to throw in the (now outdated) info about Manage Inventory function being broken, because I've noticed the object errors being incorrectly put in the "corruption" category. Also, I thought it might be useful for people to understand why these "random" bugs kept happening.

However, the point of the video was NOT to scaremonger or to make people afraid of playing the Legacy Collection. The last thing I want is to instill more panic in the community! I still think that you should err on the side of caution and back up your saves as often as you can, though.

I am getting reports that the recent patches have fixed the bulk of the issues, including the disappearing Sims. I'm glad to hear that EA is not ignoring the issues and trying to fix them! I've also had some reports from people never experienced any issues whatsoever, which is great. However, a number of people have reached out to me saying that Sims are still disappearing in their games, even though they have updated the game to the latest patch. So, whilst it would be wise for me to download the Legacy Collection and investigate the issue myself (which is something I'm definitely considering), I am also not surprised to hear those reports, and I was worried that something like this might happen, which is why my video basically says "Yeah, EA says they've fixed it, but be careful anyway".

Why is that? Well, perhaps not all of you know that I am a software developer IRL - that's my main job. I can't pretend that I know what causes the character files to disappear, but I can definitely tell you from experience that intermittent data corruption issues are notoriously difficult to fix. They are usually very hard to reproduce (which is often the first step to fixing the bug), and also you can't account for all variables, such as hardware used or the user's individual setup. Plus, the disappearing Sims have been mentioned in two patch notes in a row, which suggests to me that it's probably not a straightforward bug. The comparison to pink soup was due to a fact that it's an equally complex issue and also highly dependent on many variables, such as hardware.

I still think that EA have not sufficiently play tested the game before releasing.

The structure of the video is probably not ideal. I normally don't do unscripted videos, for a good reason: I am not yet 100% comfortable in front of the camera, I tend to ramble, I struggle to get my point across. However, for this particular subject it was much easier for me to sit down and speak my mind rather than follow the script - maybe because the issue is still very recent. I probably should have started with clarifying that two patches have now been released, and then provide more context to the situation. It's been pointed out to me that in its current form the video might come across as scaremongery, and that's the last thing I want, so lesson learnt here. The next time I record a similar form of video, I will make sure to at least gather my thoughts in bullet points to hopefully make it more structured.

I hope this makes sense to everyone, and please keep asking questions & keep talking about your experiences with the Legacy Collection

📺 The Sims 2 re-release is a mess - Corruption Update

From video description:

Marticore's video (introduction for new TS2 players):

FakeGamerGirl's video:

Tumblr post with Manage Inventory speculation:

I forgot to mention the fact that EA devs have heavily inspired themselves with Nopke's shadow fix lol. More info about it here:

[calmlb]

It’s been clear that the Tanizakis aren’t siblings from the very beginning

here’s some evidence now that it’s been confirmed canon…

everyone who’s read irl Tanizaki’s book knew that Junichiro & Naomi weren’t siblings as soon as they introduced themselves

BUT just because the Tanizakis aren’t siblings doesn’t mean you can’t feel uncomfortable about them. if you feel uncomfortable, GOOD. that’s exactly what they want

the Tanizakis, Mori— they all use these disturbing ruses to disarm or distract people in order to protect themselves, or to accomplish their goals. this is a writing device that asagiri commonly employs as a way to parallel the irl literature (it’s actually ingenious)

there are 4 main indicators that have always made it clear to me that Junichiro & Naomi are not siblings:

1. most obviously— their character designs. Harukawa is extremely intentional with character designs, & she very intentionally made Naomi & Junichiro look nothing alike

their eye shapes are purposely different

their color palettes are contrasting

even their differing styles of clothing have meaning

this was all done so that the audience could PLAINLY see that they’re not related— so that WE know that they’re lying when they say they ARE related

2. how the people around them respond to their act.

the general reaction is “don’t question it”— which is exactly what they want. “be distracted by how uncomfortable you feel so that you look away from what we’re hiding” (this is likely a protective measure)

3. most importantly, this is meant to parallel irl Tanizaki’s book “Naomi,” where the main character Joji picks up Naomi to raise her into his ideal woman, but since she's so young (& a minor) they call each other cousins (Joji makes no sexual advances on young Naomi btw)

however, his plan backfires because when Naomi gets older & they get married, she flips the script on him & manipulates HIM so that he's under her thumb (which is why bsd Tanizaki is at a domineering Naomi's mercy). Joji let her have her way because of his masochistic tendencies

4. lastly is the emphasis that Asagiri and the Tanizakis themselves put on calling each other siblings.

over & over, it’s “my brother this” & “my sister that”

like they’re desperately trying to convince us that it’s true (“don’t let your lying eyes deceive you”)

here are just a few of many examples from the light novels…

again, if you’ve read “Naomi” you knew that Junichiro & Naomi weren’t siblings as soon as they introduced themselves

just like if you’ve read irl Mori’s works, it’s clear that bsd Mori isn’t a pedophile

just like if you’ve read No Longer Human you know that Dazai’s an unreliable narrator. he makes you think he’s a bad person bc he believes he’s a bad person, but those around him see him differently (btw this doesn’t mean he’s never done anything “bad,” though bsd isn’t about morality— but that’s another discussion)

anyway, i’m so excited for the Tanizakis backstory to be revealed so that we can better understand why they use this defense!!

also let this be a reminder to READ THE LITERATURE if you’re able to!! even reading synopses & analyses of the coordinating books makes bsd make much more sense 🥹

reminder that this how you’re supposed to react while reading bsd:

also, if you’re interested in a post explaining how Mori isn’t a pedo, i wrote this analysis on twt. OR you can read this document that one of my moots sent me (remember: analyzing a character does NOT mean you condone any actions they may or may not commit!)

[teyrnacousland]

I've seen the headcanon that Lucanis' mother, Caterina's perfect heir, was actually similar to Illario in some ways. That she was calculating, ruthless, ambitious, obedient... all the things Caterina overlooks in Illario because Caterina sees her favourite daughter's deep brown eyes and quiet, controlled demeanor and careful planning in Lucanis.

But I am also attached to the idea that the opposite is true too. That Illario's mother shared similarities with Lucanis; that she was empathetic and stubborn, with a slight rebellious streak. But she was always outgoing and charming, was more impulsive with her emotions, and was always sharper with her tongue than with a sword, so Caterina only sees her in Illario.

I just love the idea that Caterina can't look beyond the surface and see who her grandsons really are because on some level she can't see past the ghosts reflected in their eyes. She can't see that the quiet brown eyed boy is is more of the gentle hearted rebel, and the one with blue eyes and a shining, fake smile is the ruthless leader who would do anything she asked.

[deadchaoticcosmos]

1976

regulus: hey, your eyes have a little green in them

james: *grinning like an idiot, he has only ever been told he has brown eyes* huh

1996

draco: hey, your eyes have a little green in them

harry: *grinning like an idiot, he has only ever been told he has his mother's eyes* huh

imagine the huh as kinda a laugh

[flowerakatsuka]

" just know that i'm always here for you, okay? "

i'm finally finishing up my s2 rewatch and getting to the 24th episode awoke a beast in me. so i wanted to make a fake screenshot based on some of their lore that takes place during that episode. i think they'd end up having a heart-to-heart moment since kuroba went through similar struggles after their grandfather's own hospitalization...

also have a bonus doodle bc i need to even out the balance between serious & goofy with these two.

[dragon-reblogs-and-rambles]

since I've seen some polls goin around for Gavv predictions here's one

feel free to add nuance in the tags

[welcometoteyvat]

>mahuika: maori fire deity >olorun: yoruba supreme creator god >kachina: hopi spirits >mualani: hawaiian chieftess >xilonen: aztec goddess of agriculture

>why are you white

[syncrovoid-presents]

Wally and the Colour RED

Wally and the colour Red have an interesting relationship in Welcome Home. This is a rambling/analysis of different things I've found that makes me believe it's an important detail moving forwards with the Welcome Home Mystery!

First! Why do I think this matters?

There's a few reasons why I think this matters! First, while all the members of the cast seem to be tied to a colour, none is as focused or as consistent as Wally and the colour red! The two primary examples I'll use to cover this is one that we've had for a while, and two that we got in this update. Those being the signatures at the bottom of the guestbook, the interactable telephone, and the name graphics on the transcript page!

Interestingly, all of the cast are directly tied to a specific colour! The signatures at the bottom of the Guestpage and the colours of the "calls" on the telephone are the same for each character. This being pink for Julie, orange for Sally, yellow for Frank, green for Poppy, turquoise for Howdy, blue for Barnaby, purple for Eddie, and red for Wally. This is consistent (and possibly something to pay attention for in the future?)

Notably however, Home is signed by Wally, while the audio file for Wally's "call" recording is also called "duet" when you open it in another tab. Audio files with "duet" is a sign that Home is present. This means that red is not strictly a Wally colour, but also the colour for Home!

(if you're curious, the other audio called "duet" is Wally's little song he sings)

This is interesting, because Wally and Home are often treated as a duo, moreso than any other characters of Welcome Home. I would also like to point out another detail, one that I think ties into this tie between Wally, Home and the colour red.

The Records

All the records from Wally's hidden message ("I will help you understand neighbor, I will find a way soon.") are red! Sure, some are glitched, but they are all red. As is this record with the strange audio (has anyone decoded this yet?). This audio is directly tied to Wally, as it's called "(DRAWING?) WITH WALLY DARLING".

However the hidden one's may not just be Wally. Though they are all name the tab "answer" when opened, I'm tempted to say that "answer" is wally prompting us to answer (or, alternatively, Wally is trying to answer us, however he perceives us).

I believe that Home is there too in the audio. If you listen to all of them in a row, turning up the audio will reveal that there is a heart beat in the background. This, I want to say, is Home and not Wally, as Wally does not seem to register them. It peaks about halfway through with Neighbor, coincidentally the audio that is both glitching and is made of a series of clicks rather than voice lines.

I have seen people say that this is "Help Me" or "Hello" in morse code. I do not know which is the agreed translation is (to me it sounds like "…. . ..-.. .. -.. ---", which translates to "HEĘIDO", which is not a word. However it most resembles "…. . .-.. .-.. ---" which translates to "HELLO")

Regardless of what Home may be saying, it shows that the hidden recordings can be put together into a timeline that sounds like one recording, which means it's most likely all recorded at the same place. Ergo, Home is in the hidden recordings as well!

Other spots where red is brought up

There are other instances of red being tied to Wally. Some are obvious, like his love of apples (red ones specifically), the Wally prints/finger paint on the bottom of the guestbook, the background of the "i <3 Wally" gif/sticker in the sticker section of the site (also shared with Home. Wally's character description is also shared by home!), Wally himself in the "so-below" page, among other things. Such as the Wally themed telephone being red, despite his more iconic blue swirled hair (or blue and yellow-trimed sweater), his clothing in multiple official artworks, the Wally cereal box, and more.

(Like something I've noticed, which is that Home is the only house that's a solid colour (red!) without any pattern breaking it up, plus the most "standout" red that Wally typically wears being tied around his neck (symbolism?). Plus the "W" of Welcome Home is red! That's fun too!

There's also some... stranger ones. Such as this hidden piece of morse code found by this person, which spells out ".. -- .-. . -..", or "IM RED" when translated to english.

And more hidden ones too, that tie into the hidden staff page (I have a post breaking that down that you can find here!! I cover everything I could find plus went through the website code, if you want to know everything about the secret staff site check it out!)

There is the red safe, which has in WHRP universe lore!! I delve into this in my other post, just know that it is something that exists both in the secret website (it is what introduces you to the hidden website!) AND it exists in the WHRP world, both written about in printed emails and as a physical object seen within The Room:tm:. You may also notice everyone is represented by their original colours, except for home, who is now white (or blank?).

There's also scrap pieces of red paper spilled on the ground in The Room:tm: (that have drawn spirals), a red clock in the style of Wally's red car, a red painting of some sort on the wall of The Room:tm: (that we never get a good look at, though it may have a drawn yellow eye in the upper center), a red apple, and most importantly of all, this:

The Red Notebook

This is no ordinary notebook. This here is the notebook that the WHRP team have "loaned" the Question Answerer, also known as the Head Curator of Question Answer! according to the printed emails. This book is very important because there are multiple signs that it was written by Wally. Inside is a sketchpad attached to the lefthand interior bookcase with little paintings and a handprint suspiciously similar to that on the bottom of the GuestBook page and doodles in the styles Wally has used (spirals, finger paint smiley face, the drawn apple, etc).

(by the way, if you're interested in what the note says the most accurate translation I've found is by Tumblr user truckfreaks

"Hello,

My name doesn't matter. I am here to catalogue something I'm not sure is fully real. But it must be. I'm holding all the evidence in my hands. Pictures. Characters. Text I can barely read. It's called "Welcome Home" and it looks like it might've been a children's book? Like I said, I can't tell.

It was sopping wet when I found it. When I first reached into one of the brightly colored envelopes, my hand was already covered in some gross, [unknown - possibly “oozing”] material. It feels like antiques are always covered in some kind of grime. I'm trying to clean up what I have and do a little more digging.

There's only one name I can make out right now... Wally. Probably important, but like I said, I'll keep looking.

XOXO"

The wrap up (don't want to make this too long!)

Regardless of what you make of this, it shows that there is even more proof of Wally, not just the character but the Wally ""haunting"" the website and the Wally within the WHRP universe, all being tied to the colour red. (Quick clarification: The Wally we see in branding, clips of the show, etc are all Wally, however he isn't current Wally. He is the Wally of the past, the original Wally, the base Wallly, whatever you want to call him. Therefore I separate him from the "now" Wally. It's unconfirmed whether the Wally that's seemingly trying to communicate with us through the website is the same as the Wally that seems to be related to all the objects being sent to Question Answerer, who is the same Wally that is constantly calling them. If so, then there is only one "now" Wally. If they are separate, then there are two, possibly one in the website itself and one focusing on Question Answerer. Please note, this is all speculation).

While it's true that red is Wally's favourite colour, I believe that it's far more than just that tying Wally and the color red together. Going forwards, anything red that isn't immediately branded as a Wally related object should be considered important, at least I think so.

As for the connection between Wally and Home, both sharing the colour Red? I think this primarily is a display of how the two characters either rely on each other or are, in the vaguest of ways, tied together by fate.

Good bye for now!

[angeart]

How dare Link correctly predict my reaction to teases, how dare (<3) YES I wanna know what prompted the upset, what well meaning thing went so wrong D: And that bit about still hoping to be loved breaks my heart for them

-🎀

the bit about still hoping to be loved broke my heart too, and that's why i needed to include it <3

so, about hermits wanting to help them. one smaller example is them taking a look at scar's tattered wings and suggesting that maybe they could help fix them. which is good!

but this comes after scar having his wings like this for about a year, and it took a long time for him to learn to accept them as they are. he's no longer ashamed of them, seeing them simply as a part of himself now. (the same way his scars have always been)

and, sure, he will still take a chance at having them healed, but it still rubs him wrong, in a way. even though it's a kind, well-meaning offer. because it proposes that he needs to be fixed.

but a whole big issue stems from something else.

we know scar and grian have changed.

grian, in particular, flinches a lot and seems scared. scar, on the other hand, often shields grian, and calls on his vex traits to intimidate the danger away, showing he's not afraid to fight. (he is afraid. he's constantly afraid.) and they're both awfully codependent, clinging to each other and isolating from everyone else.

[1,7k rambles and ~3,2k rp snippets below the cut]

one of the things they leaned into in that other world was their hybrid traits. and they show in the way they interact with each other, you know? the way they express trust and love and know what the other one needs.

well, scar is a vex.

we know there's a mating bite, but that's not everything. him and grian indulge in a lot of biting and blood related stuff. all consensual! grian is a little freak so he likes it!

it's something the two of them do, privately and intimately. it's safe, it's fun, it's theirs. them being insanely in love and ready to give all of themselves over. lose all of control on both sides, at least for a moment, in a world that hardly allows such a thing.

but here's the issue: the others don't know anything about any of it. they don't know what scar and grian have been through. they don't know anything about vex instincts or mating rituals. they don't understand anything about this new thing.

so when they see grian timid, bruised and bitten? and they know that scar seems more violent now, sharp-fanged and clawed?

let's just say they get concerned. and stage a bit of an intervention.

they just want to make sure that grian is okay! it... should be a good thing. except they've separated them and are now cornering grian, asking all these questions and voicing all these assumptions. and it's a bit awful, actually.

grian is pressed into having to explain that yeah, actually, he wanted all of that. that it's love.

but him naming the so obvious damage love just rings more alarm bells. and maybe someone asks him if it's a form of self harm, to allow that to happen to him? like, if grian seeks it out, is it self destructive? is that why he craves it?

and sort of, him and scar spiral about this in different ways.

grian struggles with untangling his way out of it, because what if they're right? what if he subconsciously sought harm? but he liked it? is it wrong to enjoy it? he knows that he had his moments when he was actively trying to bring himself damage. mostly aimed at his wings—plucking out his feathers and such. but is this just another thing like that? a substitute damage of sorts? was he just oblivious this whole time?

grian never had a previous relationship experience, so he really can't tell what is love. where does it end and Something Bad begins? he associates the bites with love, but is that bad? is he wrong? would it feel different if someone else showed him that love is something else? did he just manipulate himself into feeling like this and now he's in too deep?

at least he knows scar would never hurt him if grian says no. if grian doesn't want it. but... if grian wants it... is it self destructive? is that what it means? or maybe he was just chasing the aftermath? the soft care (that scar'd offer regardless)?

his mind is a mess and he can't figure out what his real feelings in this all are. he doesn't know how to figure it out. he gets really confused and worried and scared. (he's terrified that they're right, not necessarily for himself, but because of what that'd do to scar.) (he's scared that scar will blame himself over this. that no matter the outcome, this is inevitably going to mess something up between the two of them.)

in the meanwhile, scar feels like a monster. like maybe he was doing something wrong this whole time. was he enabling something horrible? was he genuinely hurting grian this whole time, unaware?

because he's a vex, and it makes sense to want this on his end, but grian is an avian, and... maybe scar should've questioned it more? shouldn't have been so eager to indulge? did he do something irreparably cruel without meaning to?

through this all, he reassures grian it's okay to take a break from it, or even to completely stop. it's fine! it's always been fine! but despite that, their feelings continue to spiral, caught in a maze they can't escape.

it used to be so simple. back in the vex commune. scar never had to doubt himself and the way they express their love. not when it came to this.

and now suddenly it seems so different. so vile and wrong and horrible. people are genuinely concerned and scar and grian wonder, separately, if maybe they're right to be?

... eventually they both hurtle towards a breaking point. and scar decides he needs to talk to someone about it. and grian decides he needs to be alone for a moment, becoming overwhelmed, needing some space to think.

i really want to tell you about what happens in the talk scar has with the others, but i can't. not quite yet.

anyway, this is where the breakdowns come in. (yes. multiple.)

first is scar's during the conversation he has. he gets to hear a lot of good, wise, reassuring things, but ultimately, he still needs to hear from grian. he's been trying so hard not to influence grian's conclusion to all of this, but. he needs to know grian's thoughts, once grian is ready.

grian is not ready. he's been growing so emotionally worn out from all of this, so volatile and fragile. it's all a bit Too Much.

scar messages him, checking up on him.

are you okay?

and

i'm here waiting for you whenever you come back

and

but i'll come find you if you want me to

and

i love you

... but here's the thing, right? neither scar nor grian are used to comms anymore. so grian doesn't read any of that.

they regress back to what they know.

scar howls.

grian chirps.

and only then does scar's comm ping.

come.

zero hesitation, scar unfolds his wings and jumps off the balcony, rushing towards where that chirp came from. he's being called. he's being wanted.

he'd go anywhere for grian.

he finds grian perched atop a tree. struggles to climb up, but never falters. because grian's now starting to cry, and scar needs to be there.

tucked safely into scar's gentle, loving arms, grian breaks down.

--

with a hitched sob, grian falls forwards into scar's arms, burrowing easily into the warmth and familiarity and security.

he wants to say he's sorry. he's sorry this is so hard for him. he's sorry he can't untangle this; sorry he can no longer tell which are his feelings and which are just things people have suggested he might feel. he's sorry he's making this so difficult. he's sorry he's worrying everyone.

but words evade him as scar's arms provide just enough safety for his guards to crumble lower, making him just sob instead.

--

and believe it or not, somewhere in the midst of this (hey do have a proper talk, if a bit tear-drenched) is scar's second breakdown. (grian's time to hold him!!!) that's where the rp snippet in the previous ask is from. and you'll get more of that in a second.

first i just need to tease the aftermath, because i'm a menace.

after crying and comforting their hearts out, they fly(!!!) back. there's immense relief to wind in grian's feathers, and a dangerous edge of the feeling of freedom it brings, wanting to soothe all the cracks on his soul... but the truth is, his soul is still cracked. and he's still depleted. he knows he's still hovering over something so incomprehensibly fragile. that the smallest prod will set him off and break him again.

they arrive at their nest—scar first, to warn their company not to ask questions, grian second.

it doesn't stop it from happening. grian was right: the smallest thing can set him off.

so he has another breakdown, possibly a bigger one, drawing on far deeper hurt that screams and tears at his heart. and plunges all three other people in the room into breakdowns of their own <3333

(yes that's the part we can't talk about. yet.)

aNYWAY!!! how about some rp bits.

---------------

SCAR

Despite Grian’s crying being entirely contagious— or perhaps Scar is just simply too empathetic and emotional himself— Scar’s had practice with consoling his sweet bird. He knows what he ought to do here. 

He tightens his hold until it’s snug and secure, then pressed a few little kisses to whatever part of Grian’s head he can reach.

And then he talks.

“I knew you’d be up in a tree somewhere.” His voice wobbles a bit, but it’s alright. “I wanted to give you some time… I missed you though. Like immediately.”

He chuckles softly, knowing their bond borders on codependent, even if it’s something they’ve worked on since they’ve gotten home. Still, it’s okay to poke fun at it, he thinks. It’s okay to admit the truth.

--

GRIAN

grian's sobs quiet down a little as scar talks, energy redirected to hook into the familiar rumble of his slightly quivery voice, sniffling as he listens to what scar has to say. 

it's sometimes hard to decipher the meaning of sentences when he gets like this, but scar doesn't seem to expect an answer; he's not asking him anything, and grian's grateful for being given time, a grace period where he can just cling and cry and calm down while scar holds him. 

he laugh-sobs at the note that it was obvious he'd be in a tree. he's given scar a lot of hard time in the past until he figured out that lesson, but now he always knows unfailingly where to search when grian's heart needs him after cowardly isolation.

he comes every time. he comes and he finds him and he holds him. 

grian sniffles, despondent, burrowing tighter in. he chirps a little to encourage scar to go on, to keep talking; the sound of it is shaky, about to fall apart to pieces, but he thinks it still counts. it's still something. a participation, not leaving scar stranded and alone in this.

--

OK LOOK WE HAVE TO SKIP AHEAD HERE BECAUSE [REDACTED] REASONS

--

GRIAN

grian hums again, fond and soft, slumped against scar with utmost trust. and then he finally says it. "'m sorry."

--

SCAR

"Hey, none of that, mister," Scar says, shaking his head into Grian's hair in more of a no than a nuzzle now. "It was a lot, it's okay. You needed a moment."

He places another kiss.

"And you knew I'd be here in a heartbeat when you were ready, right?" Scar grins sheepishly.

--

GRIAN

grian's hands trace idle patterns on scar's back as he gets comforted by words and another kiss. he closes his eyes, taking it in, before replying with a soft little "yeah."

-- 

SCAR

Scar purrs at the affection, openly so. "Doin' a little better now?"

--

GRIAN

grian nods, still right against scar, clingily pressed into him. "yeah, i... yeah."

--

SCAR

Scar doesn't budge, not interested in releasing his darling bird just yet. "...what's on your mind?" he prompts softly, hoping to get a glimpse at Grian's inner turmoil.

--

GRIAN

with eyes still closed, grian lets the pause linger just a moment, before replying with a quiet but honest, "right now? how nice this feels."

--

SCAR

Scar chuckles again, a little anxiety getting settled by that fact, though certainly not all. "Oh, well that's good, yes. I agree with that sentiment entirely."

--

GRIAN

"good," grian purrs, squeezing at scar. "'coz i don't wanna lose it."

--

SCAR

Scar's ears twitch, something awfully depressing in those few words. "Hey, no, never," he assures. "This is never going away, okay?" 

Since he seriously doubts cuddling is about to give anyone the wrong ideas.

--

GRIAN

grian has to swallow several times for his feelings to not go off the rails again. he takes a shaky breath, still squeezing at scar, as if he was afraid he might disappear. "... okay."

--

SCAR

"And neither am I!" Scar tacks on, even if it should go without saying. Even if it may be a little dramatic. But he thinks maybe Grian needs to hear that fact stated with absolute certainty. "I love you too dang much."

--

GRIAN

that gets grian to loosen his grip a little, enough to shuffle and look up. hair messy and eyes glistening and red rimmed, he looks up at scar with so much aching adoration, it feels like he might drown. 

"i think it's okay if— if we love each other in our own way," he says sheepishly. he ducks down, laying his head on scar's shoulder, feeling shy as his hands go back to tracing patterns on scar's lower back. "even if the others don't understand or agree." there's a precipice of a pause, and then the most timid little "... right?"

--

SCAR

Scar's heart stutters, and his ears flick up again with carefully optimistic anticipation at Grian's words. His eyes threaten to flood over again, but the tears feel different, more cathartic, less miserable. 

He tucks his head over Grian's again, brushing his cheek over his locks affectionately, daring to release a few hopeful tears as Grian says what he desperately hoped he might. 

"I..." he starts, still trying not to influence this decision if he can help it, but... "I think so. ...I mean it's—" He thinks of [REDACTED], and chuckles wetly, morphing them in his own Scar-silly way. "It's not really anyone else's business what we do in the bedroom, is it?"

--

GRIAN

grian's hands still against scar's back, simply holding him for a moment as he soaks up scar's nuzzles. there's wetness to them, something that makes grian's heart ache as he worries about all the possible meanings, but hopes against all hope that it's just scar getting positively emotional—a relief of sorts above all else. 

a small strained chuckle makes it past his lips, and he muffles it into a kiss that he presses into scar's shoulder. "right. exactly."

--

SCAR

Scar weakly smiles, giving Grian a squeeze. "...but seriously, I— you know it's okay if we stop, right? If you ever change your mind— and I mean your mind, nobody else's— then it's fine! But... I... yeah." Another squeeze. "I just want to be sure you know that."

--

GRIAN

there's a barely stifled sigh, but no hint of tension pools across grian's back. his hold remains still and gentle, his head idly leaning on scar's shoulder. "i know," he murmurs.

--

SCAR

"Good," Scar states, ducking lower so his forehead presses into Grian for a moment before releasing just enough so he could escape the big bear hug if he wanted. “... you know, [REDACTED]”

--

WE ARE ACTUALLY TAKING ANOTHER LEAP, ANOTHER SKIP, ANOTHER SCRIBBLED OUT SECTION. bear with us <33

--

SCAR

[REDACTED VERY REDACTED] “I mean, I had to learn all this vex stuff, too. It’s not… I mean it’s certainly not the most family-friendly sort of culture but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong, does it?”

--

GRIAN

grian blinks at that, lifting his head in attention. this really surprises him, for some reason. that [WOO REDACTED AGAIN WOW] 

"oh." he takes a moment, leaning slightly back, inviting scar's touch a little bit further. "yeah... yeah, i think he's—" he bounces the words around in his head again, then settles on: "it's a learning curve every way, isn't it? whenever there's new instincts and..." he skirts around the words mating rituals, feeling a faint warmth rise up to his cheeks. he looks away briefly, teething at his bottom lip as he thinks of all the worries he himself used to have, all the mistakes kane made, all the effort and talking and correcting it took for things to finally have it all sink in the proper way. 

he clears his throat, shyly looking back at scar, but then his gaze anchors and softens. his hand travels up from scar's chin, brushing through his hair, tucking a strand behind his ears. "it's not wrong."

--

SCAR

“It’s not?” Scar asks meekly, even though he was the one to propose so first. To have Grian confirm it is so much more important. Because even if they can agree it’s not wrong for Scar to have sought out these things, ultimately he wants it to be right for Grian as well.

Scar chews at his lip nervously, but still tilts toward the offered affection, absolutely weak to it.

--

GRIAN

"mmm." grian lets his fingers brush through scar's hair again, gentle with him at every step. "it's not wrong," he repeats softly.

--

SCAR

Scar opens his eyes, both of them glistening with potential tears, but he offers up a weak, wobbly smile, appreciating every graze of Grian’s fingers. “…is it— it’s not wrong for you either?”

--

GRIAN

grian takes in scar's expression and he leans in for a short kiss. "it's not wrong for me," he murmurs, right over scar's lips. 

and maybe he still feels confused, and maybe he still has some exploring and figuring out to do, just to really settle things in his heart, but he knows scar will be there with him every step of the way. just like he knows that [REDACTED] is right—scar is good for him. 

and he wants all of him.

--

SCAR

The tears fall alongside a pitiful little chuckle, but Scar leans right back in for another kiss, not caring at all for the wetness that streaks down his cheeks. 

They can match now. It’s fine.

“I… I’m—?” Scar falters, and he laughs again, ducking his head down in slight embarrassment. He can’t even bring himself to say it. To even imply that he was worried that he was wrong for Grian. “…okay.”

--

GRIAN

the sight of tears breaks grian's heart. still keeping one arm around scar, hoping it'd make him feel close and secure, he lowers his other hand from scar's hair to his cheek, gently collecting the wetness even as scar leans in for a kiss. (one that grian gladly gives.) 

even though scar doesn't finish his question, grian can connect the dots. he remembers the time when he himself thought he's not good for scar, and he knows how awful and heavy that self doubt was.

with utmost tenderness, he kisses scar's cheek, right in the path of wetness, while his fingers gently brush the tears on the other side. "scar." it's quiet, reverent. irredeemably loving.

he pulls away, wanting scar to look at him as he says this. his wings twitch, brushing over scar's, curling inwards towards him. pressing against scar's sides under scar's wings as grian lets go of his back in favour of cupping his face, thumbs brushing over cheeks.

"scar, you're good for me."

he strings up the words, slow and deliberate and certain.

--

SCAR

It’s Scar’s turn to break again, clearly, as his eyes water over and big, wet tears fall down his cheeks and collect over Grian’s hands. He doesn’t even have words to respond with, just wide, grateful eyes and wobbly lips that can’t decide between a cry or a smile. 

His hands also find their way over Grian’s, though one escapes to run his own thumb over Grian’s cheek in turn, still feeling the dampness there. It’s oddly comforting.

“…sometimes I worry the hermits don’t think that,” he admits, gaze flicking away as he tries to keep a strong facade. (Hard to do while he’s actively crying, but it could certainly be worse.)

--

GRIAN

"oh, scar." grian sighs, heartbroken, brows pulling into a pained frown upon hearing that admission. he can hardly bear this, knowing scar's been made to feel like this.

he leans in to press a kiss to his forehead, wings slinking further along, wrapping around scar right underneath his vex wings. he wants to cocoon them into warmth and safety, away from these treacherous feelings.

the hermits managed to somehow break both of them down, with nothing more than good intentions.

grian hates the uncertain, askew feeling that pushes bitter bile up his throat, telling him maybe they're not quite right for this place anymore. that they forgot how to belong, but nobody has caught up yet and still expects them to be their selves that they can no longer reach.

“you know [REDACTED I AM SO SORRY]” he attempts a smile, though it's hard. he tugs at scar, wanting to pull him in for a hug, tuck him underneath his own chin, all safe and protected, but he leaves it up to scar whether he wants that or needs more breathing room right now. 

"maybe they need time. i... i've been hiding away a lot and. honestly i don't think they can tell what's good for me anymore. not right now." it's hard to admit. "even if they mean well." but well-meaning that hurts both him and scar is just meddlesome. 

maybe they needed this though, in a way. it would be better if it came from a different place, subtler, gentler, but still. maybe they needed to work through exactly these feelings.

"anyone who says you're not good for me will get smacked," he threatens, remembering scar's (and kane's) offers to bite people who look at grian wrong, in a way returning the favour. "'coz they're wrong and they have no business spewing nonsense."

--

SCAR

Scar gladly takes up the offer to be smothered in affection, and he boldly chooses to corporealize his wings fully and gently tug them around the base of Grian's, knowing well that wing-on-wing contact is almost always acceptable. And right now that sort of thing brings immense comfort to him, too. It's something they both share, after all. A pair of wings and a pair of patched up hearts.

"I know they mean well..." Scar whines into Grian's chest this time, and though there's no cozy shawl to bury himself in, it's just as comforting. "but they don't know everything, and... and I know that's mostly on us, but god it's just... it's so much sometimes, Grian." 

It's not exactly pleasant to recall those memories. To try to explain just how horrific it was to their old friends. To look them in the eyes and admit that they're different now because they had to be. (And how they still hope to be loved despite it all.)

--

GRIAN

grian wraps scar up in his arms, holding him close. one hand in scar's hair, the other sliding down between his shoulderblades, rubbing at that point between his wings, unaware he's copying exactly what [REDACTED] did earlier.

the pressure of scar's wings over his own helps him settle a little, gives him comfort and courage through this glass-shards of a conversation.

"they don't know everything," he echoes quietly, kissing the top of scar's head before he leans his cheek on it, cradling him. "i just wish..." he closes his eyes and tugs at scar, holds him a little bit tighter. he doesn't really know how to finish that sentence; all the words feel like they're crashing and splintering over sharp cliffs.

all that's left in the rubble is a weary sense of defeat. "it is so much," he agrees. "it's so tiring to... they expect us to be..." he doesn't finish any of his sentences, but he wonders if scar understands anyway.

--

SCAR

Scar understands perfectly. He nods softly as he listens, lulled in by those soft touches, tears drying as he lets Grian’s presence fully engulf him.

“…they expect us to be the same,” Scar finishes for him, certain that Grian’s had the same trouble he has, though perhaps to a different degree. “And… maybe we won’t ever be. But… I don’t think all the ways we changed are bad. Like— sure, we’re still messed up and jumpy and… and I mean, frankly traumatized, but…” There’s an effort to poke his head up, but Scar finds himself too reluctant to leave the comfort of Grian’s arms just yet. “We’re also in love. And… we have a new appreciation for life. And each other.” A half-sniffle, half-chuckle gets stuffed into Grian’s chest. “…is that too sappy?”

--

GRIAN

grian chuckles mirthlessly at the list of things they suck at, their reactions and trauma stitched close to them like their shadow, endless and monstrous, looming behind their every step. but scar is right: they have changed in so many messed up ways, and they might never be the same, but... it's not all bad. 

"we're in love," grian echoes, a notch lighter, just a little bit amused that the list of dark things ends with a complete shift, plunging them into sappiness. it's such a scar-like thing to do; he's aware of just how bad things have gotten, but that doesn't mean he won't fight to dredge up every little optimistic and hopeful thing out of it anyway.

grian loves it. it's gotten him through many dark times, this quality that scar has. his tenacious way of thinking and latching onto bright things, even if it's a barely flickering flame amidst complete, terrifying darkness.

he kisses his head again and then nuzzles against his hair, humming. "it's scar level sappy," he replies, mulling it, before landing on: "which means it's perfect." 

the only time scar's level of sappy is too much is when he's flustering grian, but he's not going to point that out, in case scar takes it as a challenge to compare the two right here and right now. (he'd be capable. grian knows.) 

he rubs at scar's back again, humming a soft melody, wanting to calm him further. but there's one thing even he can unearth from the ashes, something written into all their stitches and scars.

"we survived." 

nothing can beat that. no matter how they've changed, or what they can now see in a different light.

they made it.

"and we're good for each other."

--

SCAR

Scar giggles at the term. Scar-level sappy, indeed. His own brand of optimism, wrapped in layers of insecurity but boundless levels of adoration. 

And it got him this far, didn’t it?

“We survived,” Scar repeats, because that’s so damn important. They survived. And they did it because they were together.

Because they’re good together.

“…the power of love,” Scar adds, soft and sentimental and maybe just a bit goofy, hoping to turn the tides from tears to mirthful laughter.

--

GRIAN

once again he gets grian to giggle in a fragile moment—a talent scar has and grian values. in retaliation, he shifts his hands, brings them much closer, until he can tease at scar's ears. 

"we survived, so now i can do this!" his cheeks are still wet, and he feels depleted from all the heavy emotions, but he still manages a grin as he tries to make scar squirm.

--

SCAR

Scar barks out a fit of genuine laughter, somewhat startled by the shift, but he can’t complain when his lips are suddenly tipped into a bright smile and his ears are flicking wildly at the affectionate abuse. 

“Hey!! No fair! I’ve been so gentle!!” he cackles, already shedding that mercy and tickling at Grian’s ribs.

---------------

aaand i'm going to end on this note (because you know it devolves again. we're good at making things fall apart repeatedly <3 a great angst loop if you ask me.)

but, i'm going to leave you with a little bonus. which is what me and link talked about today. on this same topic, really.

which is how scar changed. hermits know him as the guy who dies a lot, right? also easily distracted, carefree, easily dissipating into giggles, easily brushing things off. all of that.

he could get startled by a fly. he'd yelp and stumble and fall over when he got scared.

but that other world forced other things on him. it forced him to be brave, or at least, to seem like it. forced him to fight to keep himself and grian safe. fight for them both to survive.

now when he gets scared? there are wings and claws and fangs.

he couldn't show weakness in that world, you know?

and it sticks. it sinks its talons into him and holds.

the only person he shows weakness around is grian. and... maybe if he'd been willing to show it more around the other hermits, they'd see that he's still scar.

that he's still scar and he's hurting and afraid.

(yes blame link for this heartbreak brb sobbing with u)

also. a potential conversation:

someone saying to grian (while scar is also possibly there): "scar came back... wrong."

grian angrily counters with "no, scar came back different but not wrong."

and then

quieter

"... i came back wrong."

because, think about it. scar changed, but it can be argued that some of it is better and he's just being misunderstood. but grian? grian can't imagine any good coming from how he's now.

he didn't grow braver or kinder or stronger or any of those things. he just caused [REDACTED]. he's a scared, hurting mess. there's nothing good about him now.

as link said in our discord dms: scar needs to scoop grian up and remind him that he's here for the whole ride. he'll be here while grian learns to heal.

because he will heal.

[bloos-bloo]

Remember that mushroom goddess I drew a while back? Yeah- this is her. She’s a moth now :D

MAEVE- MY BABY GIRLLL- I’m sorry if this looks so plain :’D I cannot get myself to draw my own shit lmaoo- BUT my bishop of is finally done!

Maeve is kinda from the idea of the mushroom that controls Sozo being a deity. She’s basically the reason why her followers and potential followers have such dark desires and urges. She uses her crown to empathize and use their urges to aid her. A follower wants to be able to forget their past? She gets rid of it and replaces it with something else. Which is how Sozo (at least in my AU) finds the mushroom. Maeve led him to it, promising his pains away with the shrooms.

Now, the mark on her forehead. A heart, all her followers were stamped with her mark once they joined her cult or were helped by her. (It’s an ego thing with her) My version of Sozo has this mark, and that mark isn’t past down genetically. It could only be given by Maeve.

Those who know my sozura fanchild, Aster. She also bears the heart. Unfortunately, I can’t say why cause of spoils for future fics I have planned. But I’ll leave this crappy doodle I did :D

[ghost-bard]

Love being an arcane warrior in dao i love swinging a giant maul around and being in armour but also casting walking nightmare and horror on my enemies i think swords are cooler but the affect of a maul is funnier than big sword in my opinion. I have like 3 affects (at the minimum) going on at all times and then i do an aoe chug some lyrium just in case and bludgen some guy to death. What.

[blackjackkent]

OK, I was about to get really worried cos I took a long rest after talking with Ravengard and nothing happened - but then I went to do a SECOND long rest... and Wyll got the Exclamation Mark of Romance over his head!

Here we go!

-----

(A/N: So - I've sat down and looked at this scene and then spent the last two days percolating on exactly what the hell I wanted to do with it in this liveblog. And apologies for the extensive meta ramble before the actual scene, but I'm going to detail my thoughts a little here before making a full attempt at it, because I feel like this kind of needs Context.

I was a little bit worried that Wyll's Act 3 romantic scene would end up being tonally dissonant with the way I've developed Rakha's story/character, and the truth is it kind of is.

Unlike my discussions about the writing around Wyll's questline itself, this is NOT a criticism of Larian. The scene's very cute! Super romantic and sweet, and for any character in a remotely normal relationship with him, this would be the climax of his impeccable Disney Prince vibes and the beginning of a beautiful life together.

But Rakha is, to put it mildly, strange, and fairly unromantic. And the way I've ended up evolving her story is (understandably) not a way that the game has really accounted for. Her story particularly in Act 3 has become about her slowly discovering her identity and how to live as herself rather than just being driven by the murder urge, and frankly there's still a lot she has to figure out.

And as I've discussed here, the more I've written her, the more I've come to feel that the ideal thematic ending for Rakha is for her and Wyll to go their separate ways. There's a lot of reasons for this but the TLDR is that they love each other and have been each other's rock through this whole ordeal, but Rakha needs time to learn to stand on her own and find her peace, and Wyll needs to go chase his destiny in Avernus and also needs a relationship that gives him a better balance of supporting and being supported.

(@astreamofstars asked me the other day when I was pondering on all this whether I think it would have been better for Rakha to have done a different romance. And that was an interesting question to think about, but ultimately I don't think it would, at all. Wyll was exactly what Rakha needed in the early acts of the game; he was kind and patient and saw the light in her, and I truly think she would not have become who she is now without him.

But she's starting to get her feet under her now and needs time to actually figure out who she is properly. This isn't meant to be a tragedy - just a reflection that sometimes people are right for each other for a while, but not forever.)

I'm hoping that the game does give us this as an option after the brain fight. I know that with Karlach's romance, at least, you don't have to stay together; there were options like sending her to Avernus with Wyll without going yourself. But whether or not it's an option at the end of the game, you certainly aren't given much option for nuance in this scene, where our choices are

a) excitedly commit to love him forever and sleep together b) excitedly commit to love him forever without sleeping together ("not yet") c) shut him down completely (upsetting) d) persuasion-check for sleeping together without the forever commitment

Of these four options, a and c both feel... not great. Rakha still loves him and she's not (at the moment) looking to break up with him, so c) is off the table, and a) feels like a dick move and a disservice to Wyll's story given that we know where it's headed.

I was originally thinking about b), since Rakha has been starting to feel somewhere on the ace spectrum to me and physical relations are not top-of-mind for her most of the time even with Wyll, but that really runs into the same problem as a).

Which leaves d). d) is interesting, because it makes this scene something of a mirror of Rakha's Act 1 no-strings-attached night together with Lae'zel. That moment was one of Rakha's first real moments of connection with another person; it was a gesture of trust before she really felt she deserved it, and I think probably opened the way for a lot of the growth that came later.

In counterpoint, I think this moment with Wyll is, for Rakha, much more bittersweet and melancholy than the writers perhaps intended. I think this is where she fully realizes for the first time that she can't give him forever.)

-----

Often when Wyll and Rakha sit together at the end of the night, Rakha takes the time to think, to ponder over things that have confused or bothered her. Wyll has always been kind to her in these moments, explaining, answering questions, or simply listening while she works out the perplexing thoughts in her battered and broken mind.

Tonight, though... Wyll is the one who seems pensive. In the wake of the tense and chaotic reunion with his father, he stands at the edge of the Chionthar, looking out at the water, and Rakha watches him, trying to read what is going on in his mind.

"It's funny," he says abruptly, rather like Rakha coming out of a pensive daze with a thought to share. "As the Blade, I've faced untold brutes and beasts." He lifts his eyes to Rakha's, meeting her gaze intently. "Together we've seen illithid horrors most souls could merely fathom."

He returns his eyes to the water again, and his jaw works with sudden restrained emotion. "I've lived at the mercy of fiends - a devil's plaything trying to write the Coast's wrongs. But I've only now come to see who my true enemy's been."

Rakha listens quietly. She can sense he's leading up to something, and that he wants her to speak in response - but she doesn't know entirely what he means. They have too many enemies to count; which one does he consider the true one?

"The archdevil Zariel?" she hazards, thinking about his new intended purpose as the Blade of Avernus.

Wyll laughs softly. "So you'd think," he murmurs. "But the right answer is much simpler than that. Time."

He waits, letting Rakha process this. After a moment she nods, but tilts her head at him curiously, inviting him to go on.

"Time is so godsdamned greedy," he says softly. "It can never give, only take. It builds mountains and deserts, only to tear them asunder. It fells armies, it conquers kings, queens... even gods."

She watches as he paces along the waterfront. What has prompted this, she wonders? The arrival of his father, perhaps - or perhaps the realization that in the end Wyll has surpassed him, to become a better man. Or perhaps simply that the time before their final battle is running out, the hours ticking away before they must face down the elder brain or die trying.

He swallows, coming to a halt and clenching his fists at his sides. "We blink, and we're gone..." he murmurs. "And our hopes... our memories..." His eyes are on Rakha's again, intent and warm. "...our heart-bonds are gone with us."

His smile softens, and he extends a hand towards her, palm up. "Lucky for us," he says gently, "I've found a way to stop time... if just for a moment. Come... let me show you."

Rakha looks at him silently for a moment. She remembers their dance in the shadowlands - how he held his hand out to her at one of her darkest moments. How he has always found ways to remind her of the light in her when all seemed dark. She suspects perhaps it is him who needs that reminder in himself now, in the wake of Ansur's death and the dark look that his father gave him, the look that it took all of Wyll's worst memories to dislodge.

Smile and take Wyll's hand.

She takes his hand, grips it tightly. She can feel his pulse thumping under her fingertips as he draws her away from the camp, down the bank of the river.

-----

They walk in companionable silence for some time, until they reach an enormous oak tree, its huge trunk twisted and gnarled, its branches spreading wide above them. The smell of greenery and moonlit water fills the air, and Rakha feels the quiet soak into her bones, into her heart.

"The Wilden Oak," Wyll murmurs, tilting his head to look up into the branches. "Legend has it it's stood since the Age of Dawn."

"I used to come here and climb it when father's eye was turned elsewhere." He walks forward, resting his hand against the trunk of the tree. "Daydream of the stories it might tell, if I listened close enough."

She can see him relaxing, some of the tension going out of him. A smile touches his face, more boyish and happy than she has mostly had occasion to see from him. He seems to be looking past the tree now, into the stories of adventure it conjured. "The dragon lords sparking the skies above it... the moon elves first plucking the strings of the Weave..."

He turns to face her, watching her eyes.

"Standing here," he says softly, "I feel like I can see into forever."

It is in moments like this that Rakha feels least worthy of Wyll. She knows what he wants - an echoing of his dramatic, poetic words and the implications behind them, the deep emotion. But she is no good at articulating her feelings, deep as they might be. She is no good at poetry, at speeches.

"I'm not sure I can see into forever," she admits quietly. "But it's a nice view."

He chuckles softly. "My favorite in all of the Coast. All of Faerun, even. Not even the Sea of Stars could rival its magnificence." He watches her face for another moment in silence, then nods, lifting a hand to brush his fingertips against her cheek. "Nor could it rival yours."

Rakha has no idea what to say in response to this - but luckily Wyll doesn't seem to be expecting a response. He's already moving again, kneeling down and picking up a small acorn nestled in the grass.

"My mother always said the Wilden Oak's acorns held just a touch of wishing magic," he murmurs. "If that be so... then may my greatest wish come true tonight."

She watches as he lifts his hand to her, with the acorn still clutched in it. "I love you," he says, looking up to meet her eyes. "Will you be mine - today, and tomorrow, and reaching into eternity?"

(A/N: I'm legitimately upset bc this is so fucking romantic and Rakha has NO idea what to do with it at all. :( I'm sorry, Wyll.)

Rakha stares at him, her heart suddenly pounding too loud in her ears.

Today, tomorrow, and reaching into eternity. She has trouble picturing eternity. As far as she is concerned, her life began when the pod spat her onto the floor of the nautiloid, and it is hard for her to picture that life will continue beyond the defeat of the brain. She is not sure she knows what it looks like.

But that is what he wants - what, perhaps, he has always wanted. A promise of forever. I still keep faith in the old tales of love, the once-upon-a-times and the happily-ever-afters, he told her once, the night they first kissed. I'd like to do this the proper way - the way of the old romances sung by the bards.

That's what he wants, and she wants to give it to him, to tell him what he wants to hear, to make him happy. She loves him; he has been the sturdy pillar around which she has built her fractured life. He helped her see the light in her that eventually allowed her to throw off Bhaal's control and the voice of the beast in her head. She wants him to have everything that he desires and deserves.

But she doesn't know how to give it to him. She's not sure that she can. How can she promise eternity, when she barely knows who she is? She realizes that the idea fills her with a strange sort of anxiety, verging on panic; everything about her has changed in the last few weeks, even the small amount she had come to understand, and she does not know how to ensure that the person pledging herself to him now is the same person that he would have in a month, a year, a decade.

And it shouldn't be, anyway. The certainty behind that thought slides like a dagger into her heart. She shouldn't be with him forever. He deserves so much better; he deserves to find a love who does not bear the weight of a thousand murders, who knows how to exist comfortably in their body and hold him close and whisper soft words to match his.

He has saved her, and she loves him. And for the first time she realizes that means she has to let him go. Not yet, perhaps - not while they still have a battle to fight together; she needs him to get through the ordeals that are coming, and she thinks, hopes, that he needs her too. But there is no eternity that she can offer, no matter how much she wishes she could.

And looking down at him, meeting his eyes, she realizes something else - he knows it too.

If these acorns are supposed to hold some magic in the service of wishes, perhaps he hoped for some miracle, that everything would become clear for them in this moment and a long certain path laid out ahead beyond the brain and into the future. Perhaps he wondered if she saw something that he didn't, some way that his love for her could coexist with what he truly needs.

But they both know the truth. His love for her and hers for him are both very real. And they aren't enough.

Rakha swallows and crouches down in front of him, her eyes never leaving his. She reaches out and his eyes brighten for a moment; she feels a flicker of magic snap through the Weave around her hands as her fingers draw near the acorn. Then she closes her hands around his so that the acorn is hidden in his palm.

[PERSUASION] "I can't give you forever, Wyll," she says, slowly, haltingly, resisting the urge to look away from his gaze. "But I can give you tonight."

It is like he said before, after all. Time is their enemy. It takes and it takes and it refuses to slow down. But tonight, perhaps they can find a way to make it stop, just for a little while.

His eyes drop from hers. He looks down at the acorn in his hand and then, slowly and deliberately, tosses it aside. She can see the grief in his eyes - but she can see the understanding, too, because even now he knows her better than anyone else.

"Ours is such a beautiful story, and this isn't the ending I wanted to write,"(*) he says quietly, and the pathos in his voice makes her heart twist and ache. "But..."

He smiles sadly and lifts his eyes to hers again, then reaches to cup her cheek with his palm. His touch is warm in the chill evening air. "Tonight, then," he says softly. "Be with me tonight. I'd sooner know one unforgettable night than a lifetime of 'what ifs'."(**)

She leans her head slowly and deliberately against his hand, with the sincerity and gravity of someone making a religious offering. Wyll is one of the only people she has ever felt comfortable to have touching her - not even just because she loves him, but because she trusts him. Physical contact, physical closeness, physical love... none of it is something that comes to her naturally; it is a deliberate choice, founded on that trust above all other things.

She knows a single night isn't truly what he wants... but it is what she can give. And as he leans forward to kiss her, she fists her hands into the front of his shirt and feels him cling to her just as tightly.

They fall into the grass, his weight pressing into her. With Lae'zel, so many months ago, this act was a battle, a fight for supremacy, but with Wyll it is a dance, a give and take. She feels how he responds to her movements and she to his, and her heart clenches in her chest, because she can see just the edge of that eternity he describes, loving him and being loved by him and seeking nothing else.

It is only tonight. But as she loses herself in his touch, she allows herself to imagine, just for a little while, that she could give him forever.

-----

(*) In-game, this line did not play; Wyll's dialogue picked up with the next line ("But..." etc, which I also modified). The line as I've written here is from a different version of this decision where it qualifies as a breakup option mechanically, but I like this text in the context of how I'm framing this conversation in Rakha's story specifically.

(*) In-game line is "But... I can't resist you. I'd sooner know one unforgettable night than a lifetime of 'what ifs'." I took some artistic license to modify this slightly; I don't think Rakha was specifically asking for sex so much as just saying they still have a little time together, and I like the idea of Wyll having a little more agency in this scenario.

[spiderrcakezzz]

Must be nice to be an adult right abt now,,... . (/hj /hj)

(this is abt Sparklecare Btw)

[animangalover-writes]

Im not hating on other Zelda ships when I say this, but i truly do not understand the appeal of pairing Zelda or Link with most other side characters. There are some exceptions, as in more understand then others(midna, ruto, medli, groose) but when I see link being paired with someone like malon or ilia, I just can't see it(and yes I'm ignoring the the theory that link ended up with malon). Because the appeal of shipping link and zelda with each other, or certain characters, is that they are the only ones to truly understand what they went through. To me, having them end up with someone normal, having them live a normal life with a normal spouse who could never begin to understand them, is boring. It's not narratively satisfying.

Now look I get it, a lot of people don't like to ship most versions of zelink because they see it as "main boy ends up with main girl" or "hero ends up with princess he saves" and I get that. Normally I hate those sort of ships too, because they're usually so meaningless. They have no chemistry and are just a reward for the hero. But the reason I think it works for zelink is because that's not the point. The point isn't that link gets the girl, in fact the only time he ever "gets the girl" is in the last few seconds of Zelda 2, where it's implied that Zelda kisses him behind the curtain. The point of this game, of their relationship, is that they are forced to be the heros. It was destiny, chosen before they were even born. They were going to be the holders of the triforce, and they were going to save the world together. They had no choice.

Ive talked about it before, how tragic their story is. To forever be doomed to this tale of hyrules saviors, to never have that choice. They are the only two to understand this, the only two to be forced by destiny, by hylia, by demise, to be chosen. They will never have that choice.

And they are the only ones who could ever actually understand that about each other.

Again, no hate to other ships, but the idea that zelink move on with their lives, marrying people who have no idea what they went through? Thats boring, that's even more tragic to me. I understand the whole wanting a normal life thing, the whole "i don't understand what you went through, but I will love you fiercely anyway" thing, but it just doesn't feel satisfying.

In these ships, link settles down and lives a happy life. Zelda marries some random royal and continues their line. But there's something tragic there to me, a love that could never be, or just the idea that their partners would never understand why they get awoken by vivid nightmares or dreams, why they work so diligently to defend their homes, why they always seem to look over their shoulders like their waiting for the next threat.

Yes, they can understand to the best of their abilities, but I've always been more inclined to fall for ships who hold shared trauma, who could wake up next to the other having a nightmare and understand completely, who can comfort them in a way nobody else could.

It just feels frustrating to have this idea of characters we follow so closely, see their journey and pain and trauma, who we watch meet a myriad of interesting characters, end up with the ones who i personally feel would understand them the least out of anyone.

Anyway this isn't meant to crap on any ships, I've seen the fanart, I've read the fics, they're adorable. This is just me being a zelink truther and talking about how I PERSONALLY don't understand the appeal.

So uhhhh where are my fellow lovers of trauma bonded zelink?