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tangents-within-tangents · 6 months ago

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Thoughts on Echo as amputee/disability representation

First and foremost, I am not disabled or an amputee and I don’t claim to speak for those communities (and if I was I couldn't speak for everyone). What little I do know mostly comes from this youtube channel (@oakwyrm), this post, and other research I’ve done for my writing (and like one amputee I kinda knew in passing). By all means correct me and add to the conversation, I just have some thoughts I want to share because I haven’t really seen this discussed anywhere

Overview

So Echo is interesting. He is a triple amputee which is pretty rare in media. His disabilities come from extremely traumatic circumstances: injured in a near-death experience, imprisoned and dehumanized as an experiment with no autonomy over what happened to his body.

There are a few moments in the shows where Echo is treated… questionably. Like this bit where Rex uses him as an example of the Separatists' evils to convince the locals to fight back:

To be fair, yeah Echo’s treatment does prove that the Techno Union is not neutral like they claim. The modifications that everyone is gasping in horror at here obviously weren’t made with comfort and accessibility in mind, nor with Echo’s consent. But you still just want to be sure that “They took away his freedom, his humanity, they tried to turn him into a machine” is about using him as a living computer, not the fact that he is missing limbs.

The Batch is also pretty insensitive toward him and his trauma imo, which is weird considering they've supposedly also faced discrimination for their mutations

Disabled people do have to deal with stuff like this in this day and age so I guess it can speak to those experiences. I think especially him being mistaken as a droid (and Hunter going along with it (bruh)) might resonate with some people.

Aside from that stuff, Echo isn't really treated any differently as a character/person which is really good (as low of a bar as that is).

We get this moment in CW where Echo contemplates that yeah things are gonna be different now

While also (imo at least) showing that he is still the same person regardless, evidenced by the fact that he just echoed Rex :,) I also think it's significant that he joins the Bad Batch on his own terms and we're given a really emotional scene to specifically show that he's not just like 'lumped in with the other misfits' but that it is his choice to go where he feels his place is.

A lot of people, myself included, are disappointed that TBB didn't have more time to explore Echo's PTSD, but I think the one panic attack scene we did get is really good. Even thought it's minor it at least is an appropriate reaction from a guy who was medically tortured (which is more than I've come to expect from Star Wars shows lol)

And it's really sweet to see Omega showing Echo some empathy and consideration.

It would have been nice to see more of his adjustment period, and other side effects like chronic pain and maintenance, but there’s a lot of daily life stuff the show never had time for (i.e. we don’t know if he removed his prosthetics to sleep, but we also never saw him sleep anyway). His disabilities might take on a background role (much like the character himself sadly) but for the most part they aren’t invisible or erased, nor do they define his character and arc.

Physical Appearance

Okay this one is bit dicey, bc on the one hand, yes complaints that Echo’s paleness (most likely caused by burns from the explosion or chemical burns from the cryo-chamber) is whitewashing are totally valid. But I also think you can draw comparisons to real life conditions that affect pigmentation/complexion (like you know burns). So while I understand why a lot of fanart will depict him with his original skin tone and with hair, consider that there are real people who have to live with temporary or permanent changes to their appearance, and the idea of “fixing" him by making him look more like his old self can be problematic.

It's also interesting to note that Echo could act as a reversal of the 'disabled/disfigured = evil' trope. He's pale and bald and wears black and red, which is so often visually associated with villains, but we all know Echo is the bestest boy™

The Headpiece

Echo’s headpiece is interesting because within the show we don’t actually ever learn much about it (idk if there is more info in books or whatever bc i don’t have them so?). He didn’t have it in CW so we know it didn’t come from the Techno Union and therefore Echo probably had more choice with it. We don’t know its exact purpose but it’s most likely related to his scomping abilities. When he is hacking with his scomp in CW, before he has his headpiece, it’s clearly very mentally straining:

We don’t see him struggling like this in TBB once he does have it (though that could be bc he got more used to it over time). There doesn't seem to be much of an impact when he removes his headpiece in s3 ep14-15, except that he gets stuck in the ports every time he uses his scomp which is not something we’ve seen before:

There might not be an exact real-world equivalent, but the headpiece is some kind of accessibility aid. It means that someone specifically designed a device to help him adapt to the changes the Techno Union made, as well as a helmet that integrates it. It’s removable and visually very present, much like a cochlear implant would be. (A lot of people actually headcanon it to act partially as a hearing aid, since it makes sense that Echo’s hearing would have been damaged in the explosion, but there isn't really any indication of this in canon.) The headpiece is never really acknowledged in the show, but I think that's a good thing. It's something he needs/wants and it just exists, completely normalized, and that's pretty cool 👍

Legs

Sigh... So from the very first episode of TBB I was really disappointed that the animation team or whoever completely visually erased Echo’s prosthetic legs (I think we all were, honestly, if fanart is anything to go by). It’s one thing when he’s in armor because he would probably want to protect his prosthetics, but we literally see him in his blacks and there is no indication whatsoever that he lost his legs even though it was not left up for debate at all in CW:

Like ??????!?

This is just really strange to me! Idk what went on behind the scenes with this decision but I don’t really see why it would be that much harder to animate or anything since it’s 3D and they've done it before. We do see some pretty sophisticated cybernetic technology in Star Wars canon that mimics real limbs:

But Luke’s fancy hand is technically 20ish years from now, so Anakin and Maul are more of a representation of what level we could expect here

So yeah, for no apparent reason, his leg amputation is effectively, visually and narratively nonexistent. Which is not great 👎

Arm!

The scomp on the other hand (uh lol!) is the complete opposite and I kinda love it!

At first I, like many others, thought it was a bit odd that they didn’t give Echo a prosthetic arm. Losing hands is basically a Star Wars tradition at this point, so robotic arms/hands are well established within the worldbuilding:

We aren’t necessarily given a canon reason for why Echo doesn't get a cybernetic arm (again unless it's in some lore book I haven’t read, sorry). General fanon explanations I’ve seen are that he either couldn’t because the Techno Union wired the scomp too far into his nervous system, and/or the resources to give him one were deemed too expensive for a clone (what about his legs tho?), or that he chose not to, usually because he thought the scomping was useful.

Regardless, I actually really love this choice (and it's the whole reason I made this post), because here's the thing: There’s a lot of problematic tropes out there that either erase/cure disabilities or compensate them with perks (like how pretty much any blind character is actually not blind by some sort of magic power). With amputees that is done with robotic arms. The character is still an amputee or course, and there is still value in that representation, if this story from Mark Hamill that makes me tear up is anything to go by:

but for the most part these characters function like anyone else, just with a limb that looks a little different. It’s no more than a video game skin, an able-bodied actor with a green screen glove. It “cures” the disability, or it actually makes the character even stronger than usual:

It usually makes sense within the world of the story, but the reason it’s not so great in my opinion is that in the real world we just do not have technology anywhere close to that yet. Prosthetics can more or less replace any mobility from lost legs, but not for all the complexities of a hand (and even if they could the average person wouldn’t be able to afford it).

I think it's actually really super cool that Echo’s scomp bypasses the canonically-established amputee erasure and functions much like a stump would irl. He integrates it into his movements and everyday life and it’s (as far as I know) a lot closer to an everyday amputee’s experience.

It doesn’t define his character, it doesn’t hold him back, he lives a full life, the other’s don’t treat him any differently, and he’s still a total karking badass

The only additional thing is that he sometimes uses it as a weapon (which given his story, I think it’s cool to see him taking back autonomy in a way, and we only see that like twice)

And also the scomping, which could be seen as the 'added/compensating superpower' trope. But narratively it's no different than if he was plugging in with a hacking gadget of some kind (he didn't necessarily "need" to lose his arm for it) and it’s not like Echo is completely defined by this skill. Personally, I think it's well worth the positives of him actually having a visible and realistically impactful amputation.

I see a lot of posts or comments out there that say stuff like “how come Echo doesn’t get a hand?” or fanworks that do give him one and I just think it’s a bit of a shame. If he did get a robotic hand, it just would have disappeared the same way his legs and Anakin’s arm did (aside from that one time he got yoinked by a magnet). When Echo did “get a hand” in the last two episodes there were comments like “yay he finally got a hand! but it doesn’t even work” but I was actually so relieved that it didn’t! Bc for one thing that wouldn’t make any sense, he grabbed it off a droid, it wasn’t designed to implement with his scomp, that would be really complicated. But more importantly because it again refused to erase/cure his disability! It functioned like a real-world cosmetic prosthetic (useless beyond appearance) which is exactly what he needed it for, so that he could blend in better with his disguise.

And he continually took it off throughout the episode and ditched it at the end. He only used it for the necessity of a stealth mission, he doesn’t feel the need to visually “fit in” in his daily life.

And, last but very much not least, he made a dad joke and from my intel that is very accurate representation!

TLDR: Echo’s scomp is actually really cool from an amputee representation perspective, especially within Star Wars, and I think that deserves some appreciation

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lumiiberry · 2 years ago

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My life is falling apart

I live with my family still in a rotting biohazard of a house where everyone hates each other.

When I said “biohazard,” I meant biohazard. The whole place is covered in black mold, the ventilation is shit, and every time we try to fix something, we get yelled at by my grandparents (who own the house). They live upstairs in the three bedrooms, while the rest of us (7 total if we include the 2 pets) live in the basement where we freeze our asses off while deepthroating the mold up close. My grandfather even took my dad’s tools and equipment and saying he owns them.

It doesn’t help that my dad and grandpa are always fighting. I don’t know why, but my grandpa has always hated my father. He’s been kicked out multiple times, which meant he had to sleep in his car for periods at a time. Even after my grandfather’s recent heart attack. My dad was a paramedic back in the day, so he knew how to help him out. My dad ended up saving his life twice, and my grandpa still treats him like shit.

Recently, both of my parents disabled, as well. My dad is a veteran of Desert Storm and was a victim of chemicals from the burn pits. He has multiple fractures and slipped disks in his spine. The only reason he’s still walking is pure stubbornness. My mother had a stroke in early December of 2022. While she’s recovering from it well, she still has trouble speaking and typing. These factors essentially mean that both of them are not working, and yet they still have to be a pay pig for everyone else.

My uncle is a massive asshole. He constantly torments my mother and would rather go drinking than care for his feeble parents and his dog. The worst part is that he’s getting everything from my grandparents while my mother - his sister - is completely left out. It physically makes me sick to know that we’ll get nothing.

I tried to not talk about myself too much, but I will now. I’m queer, neurodivergent, enby, and terrified of the future right now. Not only am I forced to live with my abxser (won’t discuss here) but I have to subject myself to endless fights and emotional neglect. It’s gotten so bad that my appetite’s gone and I’m having those dark thoughts cloud my mind. The whole reason why I refuse to leave my room is so I can escape to a place where I’m loved. I’m severely touch starved and desperately need a way to both get my family out of this hellhole and get me away from everything else.

I’m fading and I need help.

But I don’t think it’s possible anymore.

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sahilmehrablogs · 1 year ago

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Is Gym Really Worth it?

Is Gym Really Worth It? There is no specific answer to this question. It depend on person to person but you may get the idea by reading the article below.

It’s been two months since I started going to the gym. I am much of skinny kind of guy and it’s not the first time I go to gym but the truth is it’s the second time. Yeah!

Before we actually get started let me first tell you what is gym?

“A gym short for gymanisum is an indoor venue for exercise and sports” This is the definition I found on the internet as I do not know what actually it is really as I have just gotten started going there.

A gym is an indoor place where a lot of mad people come for different purposes – it is my definition of how much I knew it till now

Ok let me tell you one secret “gym sucks” and you know why?! the answer is I don’t know why. It’s a question I keep asking myself and my trainer of course which he didn’t reply “Jokes apart”!

First, we need to understand what this place really is: It is an indoor place with a lot of equipment and machines where you need to take a subscription charged monthly with a trainer to guide you towards your fitness journey.

Here are my reasons to get into a gym (Pros):

As I already stated above as a skinny guy the first was to put on some weight (weight gain).

To stay fit physically as I am not much of a walking person and spend most of my time lying in bed.

Becoming mentally fit and physically active also improves blood circulation and some sort of chemicals in the brain including dopamine.

To add a routine to my life.

I think these reasons are enough to keep me going.

Definitely, after reasons to go to the gym, there are why it sucks. Sucks do not mean extreme but normal like there are cons

Cons:

Difficult to maintain a routine.

To be honest, having too much at the same place(indoors) at the same time really does suck too much crowded

There is always the risk of getting injured with machines.

It is expensive. The fees, diet, personal trainer. It is not at all cheap.

Warning: I am just 2 months old gym going human sharing my experience

NOTHING ELSE

The thing is it’s addictive. It really is You get addicted to going there once you start having a routine and it really does feel good when you push yourself every day with weights.

I really don’t know why I’m writing this article maybe because It’s the only topic that struck my mind while I was thinking about a topic or maybe because I’m not very good at writing or maybe I don’t know what exactly I was thinking. Here is my first article.

Wait before I end this. Did I tell you about my gym routine?! I guess not So here’s mine:

Wake up at 5-6 a.m

Going to the gym between 6-7(No fixed timing)

It’s mostly around one-hour session

No phone & earphones, please

That’s all

Conclusion(I don’t have many):

It totally depends on you whether you should go to the gym or not. It would help if you had your why and why not.

Going to the gym can be expensive but can be worth it.

Gym breaks your body and recreates it.

You should give it a try! Once.

Hope you had a great read!

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tteokdoroki · 2 years ago

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Since I saw this post a couple weeks ago I can’t get nerd!Bakugo out of my head 😭. He’s still pretty mean, maybe a bit quieter about it, but not a lot. He’s a total nerd/geek and is not afraid to share his interests and make ppl feel stupid for not knowing the ins and outs of something. He definitely flashes his braces because he knows you find them hot asf. He uses his intellect to turn you on. One day he’s fixing/customizing his gauntlets and you ask him about it and he’s offhandedly explaining what they do, all the pieces, different upgrades he could make, even gets into ideas he has for different pieces of support tech. When he looks over to your face you have that look you get after he’s put his hand around your throat and he’s looking down on you, you know submissive and breedable. Even your mouth is slightly open. From that point on if he has the opportunity to show off his intellect in a non mansplainy way he’s doing it, especially if it’ll be helpful for you. You need to know more about skincare ingredients and what they do, he got it. When you guys are having sex I imagine him getting sweaty and having to just rip his glasses off mid thrust. Makes sure to ask you during sex “Oh you like that?” ALOT just so he can reply with “I know you do, nobody knows this pussy better than I do”. Helps you with your homework by fucking it into you. “What’s the fucking chemical formula for ethanol” you’re on your hands and knees with his hand around your neck while he grunts into your ear and rails you from behind. His hot chest pressed to your back. “It’s- ah- mmm” “Come on Princess, can’t keep fucking ya if you don’t tell me the answer” “It’s C2- ha-H5OH” “You’re so fucking smart babygirl” as he uses the hand around your neck to turn your head and kiss you sloppily.

IM GONNA SCREAM IM FROTHING ACTUALLY

because why is bakugou with glasses and braces so attractive i want him to be just like me fr :((

imagine like college tutor bakugou who’s made to help you study for extra credit, you’ve never spoken in your lives— what harm could it do to you? you think nothing of him until he’s in your dorm, explaining formulas and other things to you like you’re stupid. his voice is so rough, and he sounds so smart it makes your brain fog up when you should be focusing :(

“are ya listenin’ dummy? don’t wanna have t’fuckin repeat myself.” he’ll rasp to you, and you have to ignore the tingle in your tummy ‘cause it’s almost like he’s degrading you :(( katsuki keeps catching you staring at him every time he takes off glasses to clean them or rub over his face— the plastic frame tucked between his teeth.

you want him to be mean to you, purposely getting things wrong to frustrate bakugou and he knows you’re not stupid— that you’re playing dumb for his attention, and like you said. if you’re not going to do the work, bakugou’s gonna have to fuck it into you.

for the next hour and a half, until you can answer the questions you need to— babbled out through punctuated moans and tears, katsuki folds you into all sorts of positions. on your back with his cock in your guts and two fingers on your clit to trace the words you need over it, on your hands and knees while he spanks down on your sore ass until you pick the right option of a multiple choice question. you don’t get to cum until bakugou feels like you’ve learned enough; reminding you of that when he groans in your ear and presses you into the floor with a calloused hand on your neck.

#bakugou thirst #bakugou smut #bnha smut #mllechartreux #📩. user login #💌. you’ve got mail

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remakethestars · 4 years ago

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Being Batman’s Daughter Would Include:

Headcanons.

❝Listen, Robin. At their core, people are cowardly and self-serving. Trust no one until you know them. And even then, never completely.❞

— Bruce Wayne, “The Lesson Plan”

TRIGGER WARNING: Plant murder. Mentions of drugs/tranqs (stopping dealers), violence/physical harm, broken bones (knee cap), limb dislocation (shoulder), (Jason’s) death, smoke, waterboarding/drowning?

Headcanon masterlist.

You know how every teenager has that paradigm shift because as much as they love the people around them, they’ll never know the inner workings of your psyche? And they realize they’ll never truly be known? And it makes them feel really lonely?

Yeah, you never come to feel like that because you know Bruce digs so far into everyone around him he probably knows you better than you do.

Honestly, he probably reads your diary. At least, he reads the fake one you hide under your mattress. And the second decoy in the A.C. vent above your dresser.

If you’re as paranoid as Bruce, you probably don’t have a diary, and the aforementioned “decoys” are just to mess with him.

Sun Tzu’s The Art of War was practically your Bible growing up.

You’re torn between giving yourself the tactical advantage of being underestimated & being non-reactive, which — besides giving you the lioness role in the lion–gazelle dynamic — gives you the advantage of having time to think carefully on the repercussions before speaking.

Because, as Sun Tzu said in chapter seven, verse twenty-one, “Ponder and deliberate before you make a move.”

Seeing as Bruce and Damian both have eidetic memories, I’m guessing you do too.

Which means you totally read the dictionary when you were young and whip our big words nobody’s heard of.

Bruce always assured you it’s okay to be scared. As a matter of fact, like he told Dick (seen in flashbacks in “The Lesson Plan”), he taught you to “Let terror embrace you. The better you know fear, the better you can use it against others.”

And we all know Bruce is the paragon of using fear against people.

Take that, Scarecrow!

(See, I chose that gif because earlier in that move, he displays a fear of bats, & in that scene, he summons them to use as a distraction and walks through them completely unperturbed. No? Okay, I’ll see myself out.)

You started into the vigilante business young, a little bulge under the back of Batman’s cape that made the rest of the Justice League in the meeting think Bruce was host to an alien parasite until your little mask-covered eyes poked up over his shoulder.

The League’s known you since you were young, so they kind of all see you as their niece. That just quadruples the amount of people who are overprotective of you.

Eventually, in your tweens, you think enough’s enough and start out on your own — being underestimated may be an advantage, but it’s getting ridiculous — and you tackle unsolved cases.

You set up various safe houses around the world for your own disposal (using the zeta tubes) and anyone who sees the inside of one in an emergency is always surprised. You don’t really understand why; what serious vigilante doesn’t have secure, state-of-the-art safe locations scattered across the planet?

Sometimes, it gets you into danger, but you always get yourself out of it. If there ever comes a time you can’t, well, you’ve got a direct link to Batman, and if communications fail, you can always yell for your Uncle Clark at the top of your lungs.

If the latter ever comes to fruition, you ask Bruce if he’s disappointed you had to call for back-up or that you called Superman instead of Batman, and he says, “It takes a strong person to admit when they’re weak, [Y/N]; if anything, I’m proud of you. Besides … you’re not the only one who yells for Uncle Clark when they get in over their head.”

Your training entailed hacking and mechanics, so you like to fix computers and sell them on the internet Hugh Jeffreys style. It started out with Macs from the dumpster behind Gotham Academy and turned into a surprising side hustle. Large portions of your profits go into either savings or funding your extracurricular activities.

You’re using a MacBook that’s running Linux and an iPhone 4 that’s running your own program.

At some point, your phone falls into the wrong hands, and someone asks why it has such high security. You deadpan and say, “I have three older brothers.” No further explanation required.

One such solo case led you to a ring of drug dealers working in a small town outside of Gotham. You made some tranquillizers and heavy-duty smoke bombs and busted out your shinobi-iri training.

After sliding on a mask covering the bottom half of your face that filtered out smoke, you set all of the bombs off at once in the ventilation system, filling the building and using the infrared in your domino mask to sedate everyone before the cops arrived so no one got hurt (because there would inevitably be a firefight if the cops got involved).

You never go into a situation expecting to go hand-to-hand with someone; you always have a plan to take our your targets quickly an efficiently.

One night, when you’re working on a cold case in Gotham, you stumble across some intel that Poison Ivy’s been stockpiling chemicals and is going to wipe out all human life on Earth.

Luckily for you, Bruce’s paranoia is hereditary; you just happen to carry some white kryptonite in your belt, so you won’t have to go all the way back to the cave to obtain some.

You type out a quick debrief on your wrist computer in case you end up needing to send out an S.O.S., pop on your bottom mask to filter out spores or pheromones she might send in your direction, and bust out your shinobi-iri training again.

Of course, you try the peaceful approach, explaining to Ivy that you agree with her on the tree-hugger front to build rapport (T.B.F., who doesn’t?), but it comes to physical confrontation. You kill every vine that comes your way with a quick punch from your kryptonite ring, toss an expanding polyurethane foam bomb (see Batgirl #38) at her feet, and manage to get an inhibitor collar on her.

Gordon takes her away, and by the next morning, it’s on the news.

“You took down Ivy by yourself?” Bruce asks when you come down for breakfast.

“… Yeah,” you say after a moment, expecting a tongue-lashing.

“Are you hurt?”

“No. She didn’t get a hit in. And before you ask, I had a contingency set up in case things went sideways.”

“… Good job.”

Your dad has the article framed in the batcave, which is the bat-equivalent of having your drawing on the fridge or getting a sticker back on a test.

You’re fighting a grin for the rest of the day.

It bugs you you can’t tell anyone why you’re so happy, so you visit Dick in Blüdhaven while he’s on patrol and give him a play-by-play. You even get a hair-ruffle!

Deathstroke targets you at some point. One of Batman and Nightwing’s worst villains, and he targets you because he knows they love you. You’re the smallest bat at the time, the weakest; he thinks you’ll be the easiest to take.

Boy, was he wrong.

He was trained by the League of Assassins, so you know dropping a smoke bomb’s not going to give you cover (and his mask probably has infrared). His brain processes faster than yours, so tricking him is improbable. He’s probably done enough research on you to know you favor foam bombs and has fast enough reflexes to dodge before they go off.

And he’s jammed your comms so you can’t call for backup. You’re worried he’s got kryptonite on him and will hurt Superman if you call for help.

It’s just you and him.

He has enhanced stamina, so he tries to wear you out. You maintain distance to avoid taking damage and wearing faster.

You always admired Tim for his ability to plan ahead (see, like, the entirety of the Red Robin comics). He doesn’t know how he does it; he just does. He can’t really teach you, so you just watch and learn.

You realize your fight with Slade is just a matter of managing the distance and immobilizing him, so you strike. You duck behind a pillar or grab onto a railing or something and shoot him through the thigh with your grappling gun, reeling him in. He, of course, draws his sword or a knife to cut the line, but you’re already throwing high-density expanding polyurethane bombs.

And, just like that, you’ve single-handedly taken Deathstroke.

It sends a clear message to the rest of the Gotham villains, Blüdhaven’s villains, the League of Assassins — don’t mess with the bat’s little girl. She can hold her own.

Now it’s time for you to come up with another plan to take him down; you doubt the same method will work twice, and you’ve just made a very powerful enemy.

As Wonder Woman’s said, “Do not mistake a desire to avoid violence for an inability to deal with it.” You might go into most situations with a plan to take down your opponent already in motion, but when it comes to an all-out brawl, you’re perfectly capable and don’t pull your punches.

You’re working on an unsolved case in Blüdhaven (Dick’s got enough on his plate) when you get an S.O.S. from the aforementioned along with the feed and recording from his mask. You listen to the mission briefing while you ride back to the cave and then the audio from the Young Justice mission. They got jumped by the League of Shadows in an abandoned factory, and Talia’s trying to coerce Damian into joining the League or whatever.

The usual dropping some smoke bombs and tranqing everyone isn’t going to work on thirty armed League assassins who were trained to fight blind, so you load up on polyurethane foam bombs and call Jason and Cassandra.

The three of you take out the guards outside before splitting up and taking either end of the building (Cass stays with you). You meet in the middle, in the room the team’s being held in.

You highjacked the speakers, so they’re blasting AC/DC’s “Shoot to Thrill” upon Jason’s insistence. You wanted Zayde Wølf or Alice Cooper’s “Hey, Stoopid,” but big brothers will be big brothers.

Jason pops them with rubber bullets from above to slow them down for you while Cass demolishes them and you drop foam bombs, slinging your signature custom shuriken, bonk them over the head with Tim’s staff you picked up along the way, dislocate their arms, or shatter their kneecaps.

You and Jason get a couple slices from swords that got a little too close, but it’s nothing compared to what you’ve had before.

When the fighting’s done and the building’s quiet, the team’s, like, “Who the heck are you guys?”

And Dick’s, like, 😏 “They’re our siblings.”

Speaking of siblings, you’re older than Damian, and as such, you take upon yourself the honor of teaching him all things pop-culture.

“I have a lot of amazing older siblings. I want to be a good big sister.”

First things first, you give him one of your refurbished e-waste phones and take him to Target to pick out an OtterBox or a LifeProof case or something that’ll keep it safe in the pocket of a vigilante.

Vigilantes are always coming to you when their phone’s broken anyway; you’ve got a stack of spares you’ve repaired.

Then you help him set up a Spotify account (follow me at @remakethestars 😉) and try to help him find his rhythm.

Poor child’s never had Oreos before, so you drag a pack of Double Stuffs out of the cabinet and a glass of milk and show him the best milk-dunking method you know.

You think about handing him a cookie and telling him to waterboard it until the bubbles stop coming up, but cookie-dunking is something every kid does; it’s sacred, and you don’t want him to associate it with violence.

You show him how you and Alfred feed the bats in the batcave.

And you show him Vine compilations and your favorite shows and movies and as many classics as you can, and you put up with him pointing out the inaccuracies and calling them stupid.

Every time he doesn’t get a reference, you write it down so you know what to show him later.

If anything ever happens to you, Damian finds your list and makes it his personal mission to watch/read everything on it. It makes him feel close to you.

You build a relationship with him that’s similar to his and Dick’s, and he comes to you with things he might not be able to come to anyone else with.

Plus, since you live in the manor still and he doesn’t want Bruce to think less of him, it’s you he comes to after a nightmare.

If you know Alfred has pictures of him curled up in your side, you ask him to send them to you. Not for blackmail purposes; just to have.

You’d never use the need of comfort or the sharing of emotions against him because (A) it’s perpetuating toxic masculinity and (B) you don’t want him to think it’s wrong or confirm any of the stupid “strength” things the League of Shadows taught him.

You gave him a stuffed cat that looks like Alfred (the cat, not the butler) with some of your perfume spritzed on it. He verbalized his revulsion when you gave it to him, but on nights he has a bad dream and you’re not home, it brings him comfort.

Titus comes to get you when Damian’s upset.

Even when he’s not with Damian, he seems to know. Pets are like that.

You’ve learned to trust Titus’s instincts. Damian thinks it’s suspicious when he’s feeling down and you just happen to call.

You never realized it until a long time later, but Ace was acting weird the day Jason came back from the dead.

And he was acting weird the day Jason came back to Gotham too. He ran to the door and began barking. Alfred swept security, but nothing seemed to be off. The whole family was on edge that day.

You were the reason Jason knew he wasn’t completely forgotten; he spotted you through a café window, and you were wearing his jacket.

Visit my headcanon masterlist.

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gh0st-patr0l · 4 years ago

Text

ADHD in DSMP

So about a week back, I made a post about Karl Jacobs (a bit of a passive aggressive one, I’ll admit, but I think it was justified), complaining that a lot of the ‘criticism’ I see about Karl is actually rather insensitive towards his ADHD. I got a lot of responses to that post, and the most common sources of confusion I saw were:

People not understanding what I was saying they should avoid being judgmental of, or-

People who didn’t know that Karl had ADHD or didn’t understand which behaviors were caused by it.

First of all, Karl has confirmed that he has ADHD.

(NOTE: Yes, I know he said ADD. ADD and ADHD used to be categorized as separate disorders, but in the most recent edition of the DSM, it was decided that they are both simply subtypes of the same disorder- ADHD is the correct technical term. ADD is still sometimes used as shorthand by some practitioners to diagnose primarily-inattentive ADHD, but it's a bit outdated.)

Secondly, that original post made me realize that a lot of people who may be well-meaning may genuinely not fully understand ADHD and its symptoms as well as they want to or think they might. If you aren’t aware, Karl isn’t the only one in the DSMP with ADHD- to my understanding, both Technoblade and Dream have confirmed that they have it as well. So, I thought it would be helpful to put together a comprehensive crash-course on ADHD symptoms and how they effect people’s behavior!

Now, before we go further, I want to address something- as I said earlier, I saw some people unsure of whether certain behaviors are ADHD or “just his personality”. I feel the need to point this out above the read more so people will see it. To answer this question, as someone with ADHD;

A lot of times, it’s both. ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder, meaning that it’s caused by the way your brain developed from birth. A lot of the symptoms and effects of ADHD are extremely influential towards the way we think, act, and behave, to the point where “symptoms” and “normal behavior” really don’t have a clean differentiation. This is why it’s technically classified as a ‘disorder’, instead of an illness. While certain aspects of it can require treatment, the condition itself as a whole is not something to be mitigated or eliminated- it’s a part of who we are as a person. This is also why sometimes, even if you don’t have ADHD, you’ll look at certain specific behaviors or experiences and go “Oh, but I do that too!”. A lot of ADHD ‘symptoms’ are just a bunch of normal traits or behaviors, but in combination with each other and some actually problematic aspects, form the appearance of the disorder.

So, what are you allowed to nitpick about it? Well, there’s no real ‘authority’ on this, and even if there was it certainly wouldn’t be me. But if you want my opinion? Nothing.

See, here’s the thing- what I was trying to say when I made that post was not that you can’t be critical of Karl. If you want to say something about his Actions, his Ideals, or the content he creates- sure, go for it, that’s fair. I will agree that there are some very valid and constructive points to be made. But when you post ‘criticism’ about the way he speaks, his interests or preoccupations, his personal behaviors? That’s not criticism. That’s just judging someone.

And you’re allowed to think that stuff! Nobody can control what annoys or bothers them. It doesn’t necessarily make you a bad person. But you don’t need to be vocal about it. You can keep your mean thoughts to yourself. And if you do make posts or communities or whatever about judging someone for things they can’t change about themselves, don’t call it “criticism” or try to morally justify it. It’s not productive or righteous, it’s just rude. Nothing else.

Anyway. Back to Education!

The following will be a descriptive list of visible ADHD behaviors, using Karl’s behavior as examples.

I feel the need to add a disclaimer here- I am not a mental health professional. However! I have ADHD myself, I have taken some psychology courses and done a Lot of research into this stuff, and I’m the daughter of a therapist with access to a DSM. While I’m not an expert, I’d like to think I’m fairly well versed and knowledgeable on at least ADHD. (That being said, if by chance anyone who Is a professional sees this post and notices mistakes, by all means let me know and I’ll fix it!!)

WHAT IS ADHD?

You’re here for the behaviors more than the science, so I’ll keep this short and sweet. ADHD is Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (Known in the past as Attention Deficit Disorder). Despite its name, the root problem of ADHD is not in the person’s ability to pay attention, but their brain’s capability to manage itself. In simple terms, people with ADHD have a lot less control over what their brain does and wants. This results in some behavioral differences along with some personal challenges, namely a difficulty with attentiveness and self-discipline.

Now, onto the symptoms!

ATTENTION

This is perhaps the most visible and pervasive of the ADHD symptoms, hence why it’s the namesake. Inattention is a lack of focus and an inability to stay present and occupied with certain tasks or thoughts.

Because ADHD impairs self-management of the brain, people with it have an extremely hard time directing themselves anywhere but where their brain instinctively wants to go. This results in inattentiveness and the easiness of distraction that is often mocked or stereotyped for people with ADHD.

Here are some examples of how Karl can sometimes display his inattentiveness;

When he has an idea that he seems passionate about, only to drop it or switch to something totally different without warning soon after (either forgetting or getting bored of his original idea).

When he sets out to do something like a build, works on it for a short amount of time, and then immediately gives up or gets someone else to do it.

When someone else is talking and he totally zones out. (NOTE: While I wont make a whole section for it because it’s not easily observable, maladaptive (constant and intrusive) daydreaming is a common ADHD symptom as well!)

It’s important to remember that the whole problem with ADHD is that we can’t control when or what we focus on. When someone with ADHD zones out during a conversation or activity, it doesn’t mean they’re doing it on purpose, and they likely don’t mean any offense! We often are trying our best to listen or participate, but our brain just wont cooperate.

However, inattention is not the only way ADHD effects our focus. There’s also what’s called hyperfocus or hyperfixation, which is when we are so absorbed into a single subject, task, or idea that it is extremely difficult to get us to think about or do anything else. This is usually because our brains have found something that is getting those satisfaction chemicals flowing, and it’s clinging to that with everything it’s got.

People with ADHD will often experience brief periods of hyperfocus. Think of how Karl talks about spending hours straight working on a build or project without eating or drinking, or how he’ll sit down to play a game with someone and end up going six hours without even noticing.

There are also hyperfixations, where someone with ADHD becomes extremely preoccupied with a certain subject, topic, etc. for a period of time. These can be short term- personally, my hyperfixation can sometimes change as quickly as a couple weeks at a time. However, it can also be long term. Karl has been obsessed with Survivor since the second grade- not to mention his memorabilia, rambling, and constant references to Kingdom Hearts.

HYPERACTIVITY/STIMMING

This is a BIG one for Karl. I should clarify; ‘stimming’ is not a technical term, and in professional situations these behaviors are just referred to as Hyperactivity. However, I personally like the term stimming much more and find it far more accurate to what the behaviors actually are, so I’ll be using that instead for this post.

If you’re not already familiar, ‘stimming’ (derived from ‘stimulation’) is an unofficial term used to describe consistent and abnormal patterns of physical and vocal behavior typically expressed by people with ADHD and ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder). This includes things that people usually call fidgets or tics.

(NOTE: There are differences in how people with those two disorders stim. This post will explain stimming specifically from an ADHD perspective! ASD stimming is caused by very different factors and presents itself in much different ways. Do your own research if you’re curious!)

There are two major observable forms of stimming- physical and vocal. Karl expresses both VERY often! I’ll use examples for each type;

Physical Stims: Flapping his hands/arms, jumping up and down when he’s excited, twisting around into odd positions in his chair, throwing, hitting, or tapping things, standing up and pacing around when he’s hyped up or laughing, twisting his rings, etc.

Vocal Stims: When he gets excited and repeats a certain phrase incessantly (Think any variation of “I’m popping off”), making certain repetitive noises while he’s focused on something or bored (”la la la”, the meow-noises, the weird heart-beat noise, etc.), singing or humming, tongue clicking.

It should be noted here that it’s pretty common for people with ADHD to get “stuck” on certain phrases or noises, and be unable to stop repeating them (reminiscent of echolalia, a symptom of ASD, but not the same thing). Think of how Karl might sometimes keep making a weird noise for an extended period of time even though it’s not that funny, or that one time he was physically struggling to keep himself from singing the Bakugan theme. These repetitions are completely impulsive and trust me, we usually know how annoying it is while we’re doing it, but we physically cannot stop.

ADHD stims are caused by the fact that the barrier between our brain and body is much weaker than a normal person’s. Because of this, most ADHD stims are actually very positive expressions of joy, excitement, or enthusiasm! Y’know how when you get excited, you feel like you wanna jump or dance? The ‘hyperactivity’ of ADHD is basically just that, but we don’t have the self-control to Not do it.

Stims can be caused by negative feelings like overstimulation, but in ADHD this is not nearly as common. Usually, the most negative reason we’ll stim is when we’re bored- in that case, our brain isn’t getting the Constant Stimulation that it naturally wants, so stimming is a way to make our own.

Whatever the cause, stimming is natural and impulsive. While different people experience it to varying degrees, those who regularly stim typically have little to no control over it. Suppressing stims is very hard and very frustrating to do.

Besides that, like I said- ADHD stims are often an expression of joy, excitement, or enthusiasm. They’re a beautiful thing that shouldn’t be seen as shameful or annoying!

BEHAVIORAL DIFFICULTIES

ADHD is a disorder which causes a lack of self-control. Naturally, this means that people with ADHD are inherently reckless, impulsive, and struggle with a lack of self-discipline that they cannot fix.

Of course, people with ADHD do still have some level of self-control, and they are still responsible for conscious, long-term behavioral patterns and decisions. However, in regards to most things, they are much, much less capable of controlling themselves than an average neurotypical person is.

These are some examples of how this will often present itself in Karl;

Excessive rambling, dragging on a joke or conversation when it could and should probably have been dropped, etc.

Speaking over or interrupting other people (NOTE: As someone with ADHD- THIS IS ALMOST ALWAYS UNINTENTIONAL. I know it can seem rude or annoying but I promise, 90% of the time if someone with ADHD talks over you, they either didn’t realize or physically couldn’t help it. Please try to be patient!)

Lack of awareness towards social cues (NOTE: Unlike ASD, in which the person is incapable of/has problems fully understanding social cues, ADHD results in a lack of awareness. For whatever reason, we’re often just not paying close enough attention to pick up on things like body language, tone of speech, and facial expression as well as we would normally.)

Indecisiveness and overthinking

Bluntness, lack of subtlety

Unintentional dismissiveness, accidentally ignoring things/people (NOTE: Again, this behavior is purely accidental. In this case, it’s usually just the person genuinely not hearing or processing things.)

Making noises, speaking, joking, etc. at inappropriate times

There’s probably more, but I think you get the idea by now. A lot of the time, behavior which results from ADHD can be seen as rude, lazy, dismissive, or otherwise intentionally harmful. In reality, we just aren’t wired to navigate common social interaction with grace.

In Karl’s case, he’s clearly an incredibly sweet, empathetic, and kind-hearted person, if the various close friends who have talked about him are to be believed. Just because he talks over people or makes a poorly timed joke, that doesn’t mean he meant any harm.

I think that’s about it for how much I wanted to point out! You can do more research if you’re curious, but I feel like this post should be enough to tell you what to keep in mind and be understanding about when talking about/making judgements on Karl, and other people with ADHD.

#sorry if this is longwinded but I had a lot to say so [shrug]#karl jacobs #dsmp #dream smp #dreamwastaken #ghost.txt

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rocksandrobots · 3 years ago

Text

Of Rocks and Robots Ch. 43 - Finale (Pt. 5)

"Okay, what if we used some nitrocellulose and mixed it with an oxidized ethanol?" Varain asked.

Honey Lemon pursed her lips. "Uhmmm, wouldn't that just make the chimball explode?"

"Uh, yeah. That's the point."

"I don't know….It sounds kind of dangerous."

Varian and Honey Lemon hovered over the chemistry set inside Big Hero Six's new lab.

As soon as Chief Cruz and Megan had left the Lucky Cat this morning, Hiro had called everyone together to meet at their headquarters. He had to pick up a new set of armor, and he wanted to tweak everyone else's suits to help prevent Supersonic Sue from disarming them again.

While Hiro worked on that, Varian was taking this time to build himself a new arsenal of alchemical orbs with Honey Lemon's help.

"Relax," he said as he reached over to pick up a test tube full of some green liquid "I won't throw it at anybody. It's just in case those robot ninjas show up again."

"Yeah, but you don't want any fire to accidentally spread." Honey Lemon argued. "What if we made something more contained? Like, oh, like what if we compressed some air inside the chimball?" She held one of the empty shells up. "That way when you threw it and it exploded, it would only hit the target with a concussive blast. There's no chance of that catching on fire."

Varian tilted his head in thought and took the shell from her.

"Yeah, that could work; on one of them. What if there's more than one? What if they gang up on you?" He asked as he poured the green liquid into the shell, sealed it, and clipped it to his belt.

"Well then we can just use the ice bombs to freeze them all at once." She replied.

"Yeah, I guess so." Varian agreed, and pulled out the liquid nitrogen to make the ice bombs with.

As they were finishing up this task, and Varian was hooking the last of the chemical orbs to his Saporian belt, Honey Lemon said, "You know this was fun. You should help out more often. Oh, we could go on patrol together or, maybe come up with new-"

"Oh no, no, nope, I'm not a hero." Varian interrupted as he shook his head.

Honey Lemon pouted at this.

"I'm just here cause I'm worried about Hiro." Varian explained.

Honey Lemon eyes went wide as she realized what Varian was getting at. She had been there when Hiro first found out about Callaghan's role in Tadashi's death; and she had been the one to stop Baymax from attacking and killing the professor.

"I don't know what good I'm doing though." Varian went on.

"You're doing a lot of good." She assured him.

"Am I? Cause, like, I'm not one to talk about 'being the bigger the person' or how 'you need to take the high road.' Honestly I don't even agree with this whole superhero thing. I mean, yes what y'all are doing is great, and yes, I'm all for helping Abigail, but… Callaghan…"

Honey Lemon mulled over his words. "But if we don't help, who will?"

Varian threw up his hands in defeat. "Yeah, that's what Hiro said…. but you didn't see him. You didn't see how much just having that one little computer chip destroyed hurt him…. I just don't know how this is all going to play out if we keep doing this."

"Are you worried Hiro might do something he'll regret?"

"No, I'm worried about what I might do." He turned to look her dead in the eye. "I can live with regrets, but I can't live with myself if something happened to him, or you, or anyone else."

Honey Lemon shivered at those words. "So you, what? Just want us to all stop?"

"No. I don't know. I just want everyone to be safe, and happy… And that's not happening so long as we have to keep dealing with Callaghan and whoever this Bosu is."

Honey Lemon lowered her head. Usually superheroing was fun. Even the more challenging villains were just attention seekers out to beat them, as if it was all just some friendly competition. Very few of the foes they faced were actively malicious. But there were times, like now, when it became very hard to ignore how dangerous their chosen hobby could be.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Varian laying a hand on her shoulder.

"Hey, don't listen to me." He soothed. "I'm not a superhero, remember. What do I know?"

Honey Lemon gave him a small smile. "Well, maybe not, but you are a good friend, and I get it, about your concern for Hiro. It's only natural to be protective of your siblings."

"Siblings?"

Honey Lemon had to only laugh at the confused face he made. "Oh come on, you and Hiro totally act like brothers."

"No we don't….do we? I don't know how brothers act. Is it any different from just being friends?"

Honey Lemon snorted with laughter again. "Yeah, a little different. For one you usually don't wrestle for control of the tv remote with your friends, fight over who does what chores, or prank each other with megaphones."

"I thought that was just Hiro being Hiro."

"No, it's 'cause you live together, and have the same guardian. I don't know how to explain it, but it's just different with little brothers, that's all."

"But I… I don't know how to be a brother. Let alone how to be the 'older, more responsible brother'. And I doubt Hiro sees me that way, anyways. I mean, he already has Tadashi… had… I mean…."

He trailed off and Honey Lemon eyed him with worry once more.

After a few moments he whispered, "I'm not trying to replace anybody."

"Well, of course not. No one said that you were."

"Then why do I feel like I am?"

Honey Lemon blinked. What did he mean? Where had this even come from?

Before she could press further though, Hiro walked into the lab.

"Hey, we're heading out soon. You might want to start suiting up." He said.

"Okay. Just give us a minute to gather things up and we'll meet you in the briefing room." She answered.

Hiro nodded his acknowledgement and left.

"Well, looks like we'll have to save the heart to heart for later." Varian snarked as he scooped up Sirque's portal magnets and grabbed the controller he had built for them. After placing these in his pockets, he turned around and asked, "What do you think? Do I look 'heroic' enough?"

He was dressed in his full Saporian garb, complete with bandana and his usual goggles, and along with the new chimballs they'd just made, he appeared exactly the same as he did the first night he'd arrived in San Fansokyo. Well almost, he was slightly taller now, but only by a few inches.

"Hmmm… honestly Sparkles was right, you do kind of look like a bandit, or maybe even a pirate?"

Varian huffed. "See, I can't even look the part."

"Well I still think you'd make a great superhero." She encouraged as she straightened the collar of his jacket.

"Ha ha," he snorted, then more seriously said "We'll be lucky if we can even find the bad guys again. Let alone take them head on."

Honey Lemon refused to let Varian's pessimism get her down.

"Well then here's a hug for good luck." She cheered and flung her arms around him.

Varian tentatively returned the hug. "Th-thanks… I feel more lucky already."

--------------------------

"So how's things going, Teach?" Sue barked as she skated into the makeshift lab.

Callaghan rolled his eyes in annoyance as he tightened the bolt on the portal.

He had been up all night assembling the frame. Somehow the pair of villains had all of the needed parts all ready to go, along with some pre-programmed software and a few prototypes to work off of.

Whoever this boss they were all working for was, they were clearly well connected and apparently had other people continuing his research in his absence. A Dr. Celine Simard had provided most of the equipment and had emailed him blueprints to her own miniature portal designs. They had only conversed briefly through a heavily monitored chat room, but it was a relief to speak to someone who wasn't as thick as a bag of bricks. Celine seemed like such a bright young woman. It was a shame she was selling out her talents to such an obviously unscrupulous organization.

Though he couldn't fully blame her reasoning… "Krei Tech, Government, the Black Market; it's all the same. They're all corrupt. Might as well go with the one who pays the highest."

"Even if they might kill you afterwards?"

"I don't look a gift horse in the mouth. If you play along nicely they won't hurt you. I would just take the money and passport if I was you."

Callaghan had stopped trying to reach out to her after that. One day this life of crime she was living was going to catch up to her, but he couldn't waste time trying to save her from herself. He had his own daughter to worry about.

"How's Abigail?" He asked as he stood up and put the wrench back inside the tool box.

Sue shrugged. "She's fine. Same as the last fifty times you've asked."

Callaghan walked over to the computer terminal, typed in some code, and read the read out that flashed up on screen.

"You never did tell me where you got my notebook." He said.

"Don't ask me. Those two boys who tried to bust you out yesterday had it. Where they got it, I don't know."

Callaghan frowned and opened his notebook again. He had discovered handwriting that wasn't his own inside, fixing his calculations and expanding upon some of his more 'out there' theories. He had assumed they were done by others in the villains' gang but apparently that wasn't the case.

He still didn't know how Hiro's little friend had come upon his research, but the kid apparently knew a thing or three about theoretical physics. The boy's new equations could potentially stabilize the portal, preventing it from breaking down.

He wouldn't need them though. Callgahn sat the notebook back down and returned to the computer terminal. He didn't want this particular portal to work.

"I'm about ready to perform the first test;" He said coolly, "turn on the power generators."

--------------------------

"Any luck?" Wasabi asked as he joined the rest of the group on top of a skyscraper.

"No." Sighed Honey Lemon.

"We must have scanned the whole city by now." Hiro said.

"What if this Bosu has the same bio-dampening tech that Momasake had?" Fred suggested. "He could have snagged it off her when she got captured, and handed it off to Sue and her grandson."

"That's possible." Gogo admitted. "Especially since they now know that we can track them."

"So what do we do now?" Honey Lemon asked.

Varian cupped his chin in thought as he walked towards the ledge of the building where Baymax stood, still scanning the city. "Baymax, are you able to scan for other things besides just bio-readings?"

"Yes. I am capable of scanning thermal, infrared, radiation-"

"Energy spikes? Like electrical surges." Varian interrupted.

Hiro walked over to join them. "What's your idea?"

"Why would this Bosu kidnap Abigail? She's not actually a scientist."

"Because she's Callaghan's daughter," Wasabi said as he pieced together what Varian was getting at, "and they'll use her to blackmail him into building them a portal."

"Exactly, and they've got to find a way to power it up. There might be unusual energy spikes once they get it up and running."

"So we, what, just wait around?" Gogo asked skeptically. "If Callaghan builds another portal and it's just as unstable as the last ones we've dealt with, then we might be too late to stop it from imploding if we wait till it's turned on."

"Yeah and who knows how much damage that'll cause." Fred agreed.

"Still it's the best idea we have right now; only we don't want to go chasing after every electrical surge in the city. We need a way to narrow the search even further." Hiro mulled over this new dilemma, then a new idea hit him. "Baymax, scan Varian."

"Wha- why?" The other boy asked in confusion as Baymax looked him up in and down.

"Scan complete." The robot said.

"I'll show you." Hiro grunted as he removed the chest plate off of Baymax's armor. "Baymax, show us Varian's readings."

The screen on the robot's chest lit up and displayed a silhouette of the time displaced teen.

"Okay, now show us his radiation levels."

The screen changed again to showcase a graph and Hiro pointed to one of the spikes that was higher than the others.

"There. See that? That's some sort of low energy electromagnetic radiation. Don't worry, it's non-ionized so it's harmless, but it's not anything that's been seen on earth. Not this earth anyways. I suspect it's from traveling through the portal unprotected, the same way astronauts risk GCR when they break through earth's atmosphere."

"Ooookaay… and outside of me apparently being a freak now, what does that have to do with anything?"

"Don't you see? If they turn on the portal it's going to emit that same form of radiation."

"Then we could track it faster and easier than we would just looking for any random energy spike." Gogo interjected.

"Yeah, but that still requires us just waiting around hoping that the bad guys do get the portal working." Wasabi said.

"Oh, they'll get it to work." Hiro said. "This isn't the first time Callagan's built a portal. The question is how long will it remain stable?"

--------------------------

Callaghan flipped a switch on the dashboard and the portal roared to life.

Sue shielded her eyes with her arm as she squinted at the glowing blue circle that hung in the air. The wind was picking up as it was being sucked into the void.

Something was wrong.

Suddenly the power shorted out and the portal shut down as sparks flew out from the sides.

"Blast it!" Callaghan yelled. "I need more power. These generators aren't enough. We'll have to connect to the grid."

"Now hold on there, sugar cakes." Sue interjected. "I thought you didn't want this thingamajig to work."

"I don't, but you've left me with no choice. Call that boss of yours. Get them on the line. I can't finish my work without a direct connection to the city power supply."

"Alright. You need more power? I'll get ya more power. Just hold on to your britches and sit tight. My… uh, associates here will keep an eye on you while I go out and fix this."

She pointed to the two ninjas who were stationed on the catwalk above them. Callgahn didn't know how many were in Sue's employ, but he had the sneaking suspicion that the abandoned factory was crawling with them.

"Okay." Challghan nodded and Sue skated away at top speed.

--------------------------

"There is a radiation spike coming from there." Baymax said as he pointed northward.

"How far out?" Asked Hiro.

"Along the river, about 20 mil--- the signal is gone."

"What do you mean gone?" Varian asked.

"There's no longer any readings."

"It must have been a failed test." Hiro said. "Let's just start following the river north. We may find something as we go."

--------------------------

Abigail paced back and forth inside her cell. Well it was actually an office with a larger window looking out onto the factory below but it might as well have been a jail cell. The ninjas threw her in here and locked the door behind them. She had tried to bust the door down, smash the handle, and crawl into the vents to escape. Nothing had worked so far.

As she nursed her arm from her latest failed escape, she saw one of her captors coming her way. It was the big bulky dude on roller skates. She banged on the window to gain his attention.

"Let me out!" She shouted.

The guy stopped, turned to look at her, pulled out two earbud headphones, and yelled, "I'm sorry, what did you say?!"

As the man leaned closer to the window and cupped his ear Abigail groaned in frustration. "I said 'let me out'!"

"Oh, sorry, no can do! Nana said you needed to stay put until your dad finished working on the portal!"

Abigail pouted and hugged her arm once more. Well, what did she think would happen?

"Do you need anything else?!" The guy shouted at her.

"No!" She stamped her foot before turning away from him to sulk as she tried to rub out the soreness in her arm.

"Hey, are you hurt?!" The guy asked, suddenly full of concern.

Abigail didn't answer. Why did he care?

However, to her surprise the guy opened the door and poked his head into the office.

"Did those robots hurt your arm?" He asked once more.

She looked back at him blankly. "Robots? Is that why those ninjas are so strong? They're robots?"

"Yeah." The large guy confirmed as if barely acknowledging how crazy that sounded. "Do you need an ice pack?"

"Sure." Abigail replied dumbfoundedly. Seriously, why was this guy being so nice?

"I'll go get you one. I'm Stu by the way." He flashed her a huge grin.

"Abigail." She replied still dumbstruck.

"Nice to meet you. I'll be right back." And with that he shut the door again and walked away.

Abigail got up and ran to the door. It was locked once more. Either the guy was smarter than he looked or it locked automatically.

Abigail bit her lip in thought. This Stu person could be her means of escape if she played her cards right.

"I'm back." Stu cheerfully said a few minutes later. "I got you an ice pack and some Tylenol."

He opened the door and handed Abigail the small little package containing the pills.

"Where'd you get this?" She asked.

"Oh, in the vending machine down the hall." He explained as he wrapped her arm in an ace bandage so as to better hold the ice pack in place. "I didn't have any money so I had to headbutt it a couple times. I got a free bag of Cheetos out of it as well."

He finished applying the bandage. "There! Man those robots are so dumb. Not to mention careless. Sorry you got hurt like that."

Abigail plastered a smile on her face. "It-it's okay…. Uhmm…I don't suppose you happen to have anything to drink these down with do you?" She said as she held up the pack of Tylenol.

"Oh sure. I'll go get you a bottle of water. Hang tight."

He left again and Abigail got to work. She removed the bandage and placed the ice pack on the floor in front of the door. Then she took the bandage and tied it between two desk chairs that were seated in the office. She placed these further out in front of the ice pack; spacing them far enough apart the rope laid taunt next to the ground right at ankle height.

Then she heard Stu's return and she jumped into the seat; placing her hands in her lap and slapping on a huge smile to look as innocent as possible as he skated in.

"Here ya, gooooo-woah!" He slipped on the ice pack and stumbled forward.

Abigail jumped up, grabbed the water bottle in his hand to sling him around, and with a well placed kick, Stu went rolling backwards into the tripwire. As he toppled over, Abigail sprinted out the door, locking it behind her.

"Hey! That's not very nice!" He yelled as he righted himself and ran up to the window.

Abigail paused in her getaway. "Yeah, and neither's kidnapping people and holding them hostage!"

Stu looked stunned for a moment as he thought over her words. "Yeah, okay, fair." He finally admitted as he hung his head. Then just as quickly he perked back up and smooshed his face to the glass. "Oh, but Nana's not going to like that you escaped."

"Yeah, well, Nana's just going to have to deal. Where's my dad?"

"Uh, on the first floor I think. Take the stairs down the end of the hall and then turn left."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome. Oh, but watch out for the robot ninjas!" He shouted after her as she ran away, opening the pack of pain pills as she went.

As Abigail neared the stairs she heard banging and the sound of glass cracking. She looked back and saw Stu slamming himself against the window repeatedly; and he was making a lot more headway then she had. She needed to find her dad fast.

--------------------------

Supersonic Sue was hooking up the last of the electric cables to the power lines when she spotted Big Hero Six flying towards the power plant.

"Looks like those do-gooders found our hideout. Better give them a welcoming party." She said to herself with a smile as she pulled out a remote control and pressed a button.

--------------------------

"Looks like there's a building up ahead!" Hiro shouted at his companions, who followed close behind, but stopped short when Baymax came to an abrupt halt.

From out of the woods stepped a robot ninja, who stood in their path.

"Yeeeeessssss!" Laughed Fred. "Finally I get to fight a robot ninja! My life is complete!"

"Be careful! Those things are deadly!" Varian warned.

"Oh come on. There's only one of it and seven of us. We can take...him?"

Just as Fred finished his boast another stealth robot appeared, and then another, and yet another, until the superhero team was surrounded by thirty or more of the killer androids.

"You were saying?" Wasabi snapped at Fred.

As if taking that as a cue, the robots jumped them and all hell broke loose.

Wasabi slammed the gas on his car and plowed through five of the droids, before hitting the brakes and jumping out as the robots dog piled the vehicle. He righted himself and whipped out his laser blades to start hacking away at the enforcers and the deadly shurikens they threw at him.

As he fended off the horde, Gogo skated around dodging their attacks and knocked the snipper robots out of the trees with her discs.

"Woo-hoo!" Fred shouted with glee as he bounced on top of robot after robot, just barely escaping their grasp as they lunged for him. "This is awesome! Terrifying, but awesome!"

Varian rolled his eyes at his friend's enthusiasm as he threw an ice bomb down below at the coming onslaught. He then had to grab hold of Hiro's waist as Baymax decided to do another barrel roll, knocking two more ninjas out of the trees.

When they righted again Varian's heart jumped to his throat when caught sight of Honey Lemon. She was several yards away, cut off from the rest of their friends and pinned down by one of the robotic assassins.

He shouted at her to hold on and Hiro drove Baymax towards her; only for the three of them to get jumped on by another robot. As they fought this new foe, Varian feared they wouldn't reach their friend in time.

Fortunately Honey Lemon was able to wiggle one arm free and grabbed a chimball from off her purse strap. She shoved it into her attacker's abdomen, lodging it in between some exposed gears, and with all her might she kicked the robot off her.

The android stood back up and started to stalk towards her once more, but suddenly stopped when the chimball ruptured and began to encase him in a pink crystal like substance.

Honey Lemon didn't have time to rejoice though as another ninja came up from behind to grab her arm. She threw another chimball at it and this time the robot let go and dubbed over as a shockwave from a small explosion sent the thing crumpling in on itself. Her concussive grenade had worked.

"Are you okay?" Varian shouted as they finally reached her.

"Yeah." She nodded as Hiro repelled another robot away with his electromagnets.

"I have found Supersonic Sue." Baymax calmly stated as he shot his rocket fist into the oncoming horde.

"Where?" Hiro asked, but soon saw the fading streak of dust traveling at high speed towards the abandoned building up ahead.

"We have to go after her. That building must be where they're keeping Callaghan and Abigail."

"Don't worry. I got this." Honey shouted as she ran ahead and shot down another wave of robots with her chempurse's bazooka setting.

"You three go on, we'll hold off the ninjas." Gogo spoke into the intercom before slicing off one of the androids heads with her frisby.

With that Hiro directed Baymax to follow Sue, only for them to be surrounded by a new group of ninjas lying in wait for them, just a mile down the road, even larger than the last horde.

"Where is she getting all these robots from!?" Hiro shouted in frustration.

"I have an idea!" Varian said and he pulled out the portal magnets.

Hiro saw what he was getting at. "Guys," he warned over the intercom, "Varian and I are going to use the mini-portal to break in, but be on your toes cause a new wave of robot ninjas are going to head your way soon."

"Oh you gotta be kidding me." Wasabi complained over the other end.

Varian ignored their friend's protests and typed a command into the portal's remote control. He then tossed the magnets into the air. With a flip of a switch, the magnetic balls began to link up and spin as a portal started to form in the air.

Hiro commanded Baymax to fly to it, and helped to maneuver the android to avoid the ninjas' attacks, as the robotic assassins tried to stop them from leaving.

They dodge one that tried to jump them, and Hiro kicked another off that had grabbed hold of Baymax's armor and was climbing up towards them. Meanwhile Varian threw one last alchemical orb at the swarm of robots as they flew into the portal. Hiro heard an explosion behind them, but ignored it as he focused on the upcoming confrontation ahead of them.

--------------------------

"Okay Callaghan, I siphoned off electricity from the city's power grid. You should be good to go." Sue said as she entered the lab.

"Good, now just stand there and hold that lever down while I turn the machine on." Came Callaghan's terse reply.

"Why? What does the lever do?" Sue asked in suspicion.

"It keeps the fan on the turbines going and prevents the portal from overheating." Callaghan lied.

Sue raised an eyebrow at him, not fully buying it. "You want me to stand next to a giant, untested, potential death machine that may explode at any moment?"

"I assure you it works, and I thought you could order one of your 'associates' to do it, but looks like most of them have left the building save for the one you kept on lookout there."

Sue gave him a death glare.

"Or hey, don't do it and don't get the portal working. See if I care. I didn't ask to get dragged into this."

Sue finally relented at this and walked over to the base of the portal and pulled the lever down. "Like this?" she asked.

"Yeah, just like that." Callaghan said as he walked over to the computer terminal to turn it on. Then under his breath, where Sue couldn't hear, he said. "Just like that you rancid cow; stay right there and be the folly of your own demise."

But before Professor Callaghan could turn on the device and suck his hated captor into the void, another portal opened up overhead and in flew Hiro, Baymax, and Varian; knocking out the one remaining guard as they did so, who fell to the ground in a crumpled heap of frayed wires and busted gears.

"Step away from the portal, Callaghan." Hiro ordered at him.

For his part, Callaghan did as he was told and backed away, hands raised.

"Why you little scamps." Sue said. She almost sounded impressed. "You got persistence and gumption, I'll give ya that, but ain't half as clever as you think you are."

With a nod of her head another ninja jumped from the shadows above them and grabbed Varian by his jacket collar.

"Seriously, where are you getting all these robots!?" Hiro asked.

"Oh, just from an old buddy of mine." She nonchalantly said as she made her way to the door.

"Kensei?" Hiro spat as he finally threw the robot off them.

"Ah so you heard," Sue said, "and they say kids these days don't know their history. Yeah, I thought the ninja aesthetic was a little hokey myself; Kensei's gimmick was always centered around lame karate stuff, but hey, who am I to judge?"

And with that, as quick as a wink, she tossed one of the now defunct robot's weapons at them. Only instead of the usual shuriken, it was a metal ball that opened up and released a weighted net that was difficult to dodge.

As both boys struggled to pull it off, Baymax fell to the ground below under its weight and Supersonic Sue tried to make her getaway.

Only to stop when Stu burst through the door.

"Nana! I am soo, so sorry, but Abigail's escape!"

"What!?" She shouted.

With this news, Callaghan raced to the computer terminal while everyone was distracted and turned on the device.

--------------------------

The ground rumbled and soon a heavy wind picked up as the unstable portal began to suck things into it.

Abigail wandered around the abandoned building utterly lost. She had deviated from Stu's directions in order to avoid running into those ninjas again. She hadn't seen any more of them around for awhile, but now she couldn't find her way back.

Suddenly the ground shook as if there was an earthquake. Abigail ran under a door frame for shelter and held on tightly.

As the tremor subsided, Abigail began to wonder if it was a natural occurrence at all.

Portals, that was what this was all about, apparently. The bad guys had wanted her father to build them one, but if he did, it could blow up in all of their faces, literally.

Then she heard yelling down the hall, as a wind picked up.

"Dad!" She shouted and knowingly ran towards the danger.

--------------------------

"Are you crazy!?" Sue shouted over the howling wind.

"No, desperate!" Callaghan shouted back. "I rigged this portal to implode in on itself!"

Sue looked at him as if he'd grown two heads.

"There's children in here, ya dang fool!" Came her reply.

"I'm not a child!" Varian protested as he struggled underneath the net.

Both villains ignored him.

"Oh, says the woman who attacked them with a bunch of deadly robots!"

"Oh please, their weapons were set to stun. I wasn't going to hurt a bunch of snot nosed brats... much."

As if to counteract this statement another robot ninja jumped out at them and shot a laser out of it's wrist right at Callaghan. The professor ducked out of the way as sparks flew around him. Then the wind from the portal sucked the android right into the void.

Sue, for once, looked embarrassed at being called out in her hypocrisy.

"In my defense I don't know anything about programming robots." She said.

"Call off the bots, let everyone go, and I'll turn the portal off!" Callaghan said.

Just then the wind picked up even more, the net over the two boys flew off and Varian and Hiro would have been swept away into the nothingness had Baymax not caught them.

"Fine!" Sue relented as she pressed a button on a remote. "It's no skin off my nose if the portal doesn't get built or not."

Another robot, that had just entered from the upper level, suddenly collapsed and fell down to the floor in a heap as it was deactivated. Then it's remains along with the other destroyed robots got sucked into the portal as well.

Satisfied with her compliance Callaghan turned around to shut the terminal off, only for the computer to explode which led to the rest of the machine to catch on fire.

"Well what did you do now?!" Sue shouted.

"It wasn't me! That robot of yours must have damaged the controls!"

Just then, Abigail shoved past the doors.

"Dad!" She called to him desperately, choking back the smoke that started to fill the room, and that was when Callaghan realized how badly he had screwed up.

Sue rolled her eyes. "Oh I've had enough of this! Stu, make us an exit! I'll salvage what we can here!"

"Right Nana!" Stu saluted. Then he revved up his skates, curled up into a ball, and basted himself at the concrete wall on the opposite side of the room at top speed.

He busted through three walls before coming out the other side and Hiro could just make out the glimmer of sunlight on the other end.

While Stu was busy with that, Sue skated right up to Callaghan and slugged him in the face. The professor fell backwards, clutching his jaw.

"Dad!" Abigail shouted again and ran to his side.

Sue skated over to the desk next to where they stood, or what was left of it. After finding what she wanted she turned to leave; only stopping long enough to give the murderous professor a sneer of pure disdain before skating away in a blur after her grandson.

As soon as she was gone a squeal of metal scraping against metal was heard. One of the portal's legs collapsed under The heat of the spreading fire and the gaping maw of the void turned at an angle towards the roof. The ceiling started to cave in from under the strain.

Everyone had to dodge out of the way quickly from the falling debris. One particularly large steel beam nearly fell right on top of Callaghan and Abigail, and he had to push his daughter away quickly. She stumbled back and was almost sucked into the void again until Baymax pulled her out of the way.

As the robot and the three humans huddled behind a concrete slab, Abigail tried to break away from the android's grip.

"Dad, no!" She sobbed.

"I'm alright!" Came Callaghan's call. "I'm just trapped on the other side!"

Abigail cried with relief.

"We're coming after you." Hiro shouted back.

"No, don't! You three get out of here! Take Abigail to safety."

"But what about you?" Varian yelled.

"Don't worry about me, I'll find another way out."

Soon they saw Callaghan start to climb up a ladder to the catwalk above.

"He must be trying to go around." Hiro said. "He'll never make it that way."

As if to confirm this, more debris fell from the collapsing roof, blocking their view of the professor. Hiro came to a decision.

"Baymax, take Varian and Abigail and get out. I'm going after Callaghan."

"That's crazy!" Varian protested.

"I do not feel that is a very safe option." Baymax agreed, but Hiro was already halfway finished climbing up the other side of the concrete slab.

"Don't worry, I got my gear! Just go on! Now!"

Baymax gave in to Hiro's orders and scooped Abigail up in arms. He then took off and flew away before Varian could crawl off his back.

--------------------------

Varian casted a fearful look behind him as he watched Hiro run through the smoke. Then as they made it to the tunnel he watched in horror as the portal fell completely and the rest of the building started to come down.

"No stop!" He yelled. "We have to go after them!"

Either Baymax didn't hear him or the robot ignored his pleas; too set on following his previous commands.

As they neared the exit, Varian gathered his courage and jumped off the robot and onto the grassy ground that opened up below.

It took a moment for Baymax to realize what had happened. He turned around to see Varian running back into the burning building.

"No! Don't!" Abigail screamed after him.

"Baymax, get Abigail out of here, and have the rest of the gang fall back!" Varian yelled over his shoulder. "No telling what the range of the blast radius of the portal will be once it finally implodes in on itself!"

Then he dove out of sight into the tunnel.

--------------------------

Hiro coughed as the smoke burned his lungs and stung his eyes. He searched for a way through the flames to the back of the former power plant, where the catwalk hung over head; dodging the debris that rained down around him. Then when he was directly under the service ramp, he used his electromagnetic whips to grab hold of the catwalk and pull himself up.

No sooner did he make it to the top, then did the portal fall down completely and along with it the rest of the roof.

A large hunk of the ceiling fell right on top of the walkway, snapping the metal railing into two. Hiro held on to the side desperately as the severed catwalk now shifted as it's structural integrity was compromised. Fortunately for him he had magnetic gloves on. Callaghan wasn't so lucky.

The professor went falling over the side as the ramp broke. He only just barely managed to grab hold of the bottom railing before falling into the void below. However he wasn't safe as the wind kept trying to suck him in and shook the broken catwalk ever which way.

--------------------------

Varian pulled up his bandana over his nose to block out the smoke. He also pulled down his goggles to protect his eyes. Still there was little he could do about the insufferable heat nor the falling hunks of metal and stone.

Somehow though he managed to make his back through to the former lab. As he entered the flame filled room the first thing he did was to look up. He noticed Callaghan and Hiro hanging from the broken catwalk right away, but how was he to get them down?

He spotted a ladder near the wall and next to it a long linked chain. He ran up to it and with a few tugs he broke the chain free from the pulley hook it hung from. He quickly wrapped it around his shoulder like you would a rope and then started to climb.

--------------------------

Hiro gauged the distance between him and Callaghan. It wasn't far, he could make it…. Or miss it completely and go tumbling into the void forever.

He gulped as he dared to look below him.

Just then the wind picked up speed once more and the catwalk bent under the force of the portal's suction.

"W-woah!" Callaghan screamed as he held on for dear life and Hiro himself gripped the railing beside him even tighter. He then threw out one of his whips to wrap around the end of the other catwalk leveling it somewhat.

"C-can you climb up?!" Hiro grunted.

Callaghan tried to, but failed. He was getting on in years and could no longer nimbly climb up the side of things like Hiro could. There was also the ever increasing pull of the portal to fight against.

"It- it's no use!" Callaghan called out. "Get out of Hiro! Save yourself! I don't want your death on my conscience as well!"

Those words hit Hiro deeper than Callaghan knew, and for a moment Hiro seriously considered following his advice and just leaving the man to his fate.

After all, there wasn't any obvious way to save him. Hiro would only be risking his life for nothing the longer he stayed. It wasn't murder just to save your own skin, not really, and well, Callaghan had brought this onto himself. All of it, the portal, his imprisonment, the fire…

Hiro gave the pathetic old man a cold glare; one that cut through even the inescapable heat of the rising flames around them.

Oh how he hated Callaghan!

He took a deep breath and retracted his magnetic whip, leaving the other side of the catwalk free to twist in the wind.

Still he didn't immediately turn to leave. Never taking his eyes off Callaghan, Hiro watched his brother's murderer flail about as he struggled to maintain his hold on the railing. Time felt like it had slowed to a crawl for Hiro as his mind was racked with indecision.

It would be so easy, he thought. So easy, and no one would blame him. His breath shallowed as he waited for the inevitable; his eyes fixated on Callaghan.

That's when Hiro noticed a foot fall behind him as the walkway shifted beneath him once more.

Varian was right behind him with a length of chain in his hands. The other boy said nothing, nor did he hand Hiro the makeshift rope.

Their eyes met and Hiro silently pleaded with him. Varian knew. Varian knew exactly what Hiro was going through. He knew the pain. He knew the desire. He knew what was happening, and he wasn't going to do anything to stop it.

It was Hiro's choice and Hiro's choice alone.

Hiro gulped once more as his heart pounded in his ears and angry tears stung his eyes.

No, Varian wouldn't judge him, but what about himself? What did he want? What was he willing to give up to get it? How could he face himself in the morning, or the next day, and everyday after that?

Hiro shook his head as everything suddenly became clear. There was no choice. Not really, as there was only ever one choice Hiro could live with.

He grabbed the chain out of Varian's hands and threw the other end to Callaghan. Once the professor had taken hold, both boys pulled him up. Then all three ran down the catwalk, slid down the ladder, and then dove through the hole in the wall.

--------------------------

As the two teens and professor ran away from the collapsing building, they heard an explosion go off behind them. Callaghan grabbed them both and pushed them to the ground; using his own body to shield them as best he could as the shockwave passed over them.

Out of the corner of his eye, Hiro could see the trees around them bending backwards till their top branches nearly touched the ground. The earth trembled beneath them and a loud noise that made his ears ring sounded around them.

Finally, once Callaghan had deemed it safe enough, Hiro sat up to view the damage. Below them was a crater where the former power plant had stood. Not a sign was left of the portal.

"There they are!" Fred shouted behind them and Hiro turned to see his friends running towards them.

Abigail was also with them.

"Dad!" She ran up to her father first and wrapped her arms around him.

Callaghan broke down crying as he returned the hug. He kissed the top of head, and held her close, before cupping her face in his hands and nuzzling her nose the way he had always done when she was young.

It was the first time he had held his little girl in over five years.

"I missed you too, Dad." Abigail said as she snuggled closer to him and wrapped him another hug.

Hiro broke away from the celebration and the cheers of congratulations from his friends, as he watched Callaghan and Abigail reunite. Instead of joining in their merriment, he went and sulked underneath a tree overlooking the spot where the power plant once stood.

They all gave him space, except for Varian who walked over to join him. The other boy didn't say anything. He just rested a hand on Hiro's shoulder and sat beside him as everyone waited for the police to arrive.

"I still hate him." Hiro whispered as tears ran down his cheeks.

"Yeah, me too." Varian agreed.

And that was all that needed to be said. Hiro didn't regret saving Callaghan, but neither could bring himself to forgive Tadashi's murderer; even after all that happened; and that was okay. One didn't need to forgive in order to do the right thing, and in a small way that brought Hiro a little peace, even if the loss still hurt.

Still he couldn't help but smile a little bit, in spite of himself, when Judy also arrived along with the police. Krei had given her a lift as soon as they'd received the text that Abigail had been rescued.

After the two girlfriends reunited, Abigail introduced her significant other to her dad, who was overjoyed at the news.

As Callaghan pulled both girls into a group hug, even Hiro had to admit they made a sweet family. Enough so, that Hiro almost felt sorry for them when Chief Cruz walked over to re-arrest the professor. Almost.

"I love you." Callaghan said as he entered the back of the police van.

"I'll see you next Tuesday; on visitor's day." Abigail sobbed. "We both will."

Callaghan tried to say something encouraging in response but the words caught in his throat as he choked on his own tears.

The police shut the door, and Abigail broke down again as she watched the police van drive away. Judy hugged her and planted a kiss on her cheek, as she wiped her tears away.

"Come on, I'll give you a ride back to your apartment." Krei gingerly stepped in and gently encouraged the two girls to follow him to the car.

"And don't worry about coming into work tomorrow. Take all the time you need." He told Judy as he opened the car door. She flung her arms around him in a grateful hug, to which Krei awkwardly returned. Judy wasn't known for being affectionate, not to him anyways.

"Uh, yeah, don't mention it." He said before breaking away and walked around into the driver's seat.

As the car drove away Cruz walked over to the superheroes. "I got a few questions for you."

"Yeah?" Hiro said as he got up walked over to the police chief.

"Do you know where Sue and her grandson are right now?"

"No."

"Do you know who was funding their portal research?"

"No."

"Then what do you know?"

"Callaghan didn't escape. Sue kidnapped him and blackmailed him." Fred offered up.

"So you said over the phone, but why?"

"Have you heard of the new crime lord running things since Di was arrested?" Gogo asked.

"Maybe. Were they behind this? Why are they after portal tech?"

Hiro shrugged, "We don't know."

"Do you know who they are?"

"Have you ever heard of an old supervillain called Kensei?"

Curz's eyes went wide at the mention of that name. "I'm going to need you to come down to the station with me."

The team of superheroes was startled by that.

"Sorry, but no, can do, officer." Hiro shook his head as Baymax flew up beside him.

"Wait! You're not under arrest; I promise, I just need more information!" Cruz pleaded as the heroes took off running, their enhanced gear allowing them to move faster than his men.

Cruz took off his hat and threw it to the ground in frustration as the last of the supers disappeared.

--------------------------

Supersonic Sue watched from above as the police departed. She had hid in the trees in order to spy on the gang of do-gooders.

"What now Nana?" Her grandson asked as they climbed down.

"Now, Stu, we go weasel some, I mean 'get paid', some money from my dear old friend, and then we high tail it out of here and laid low for awhile till this whole thing blows over."

"But we didn't get the portal, and the professor escaped?"

"Now don't you worry, none, hun. Nana's got everything under control." She said as she whipped out her cell phone.

"Hey Kensei? Yeah, got some bad news about that portal you wanted…. Now, now, don't go getting your knickers in a twist; I got something that still might interest you." Sue chuckled as she pulled out the blue notebook from her pocket.

--------------------------

Wasabi pulled up to the gas pump and got out of the car.

"Do you guys want anything while we're here?" He asked the two boys riding in the back seat.

Hiro and Varian shook their heads no, and Wasabi left to go pay for the gas.

Once they had all safely gotten away from the police, it was decided by the group of teenagers to ditch their superhero gear and ride home normally.

Fred had called Heathcliff to pick him and the girls up, while Hiro and Varian volunteered to walk back with Wasabi to his car.

Baymax was currently in the trunk and had powered down into sleep mode in order to save on energy. It wouldn't do to have a 'drunk' robot running around the cafe on low battery, when their aunt came home.

Aunt Cass had texted them not too long ago to let them know she was leaving the hotel. Apparently Tracey's car had had a flat tire and they were getting a late start.

Thus far, on the ride back, neither boy had said much to the other. Each was lost in their own thoughts as Wasabi obliviously carried on all the conversation. It was mostly about opera as he had had the radio on.

Though without Wasabi's singing to distract them, Hiro started to grow uncomfortable with the silence.

"Hey, thanks, for helping out back there." He said.

"You're welcome." Varian replied in a tired manner.

"You know, I… I don't know what I would have done had you not shown up when you did."

Varian just shrugged. "Probably just save the day, like you always do." He then turned to look at Hiro. "I knew you wouldn't go through with it."

"How? How can you be so sure?"

"Cause, you're not me." Varian said as he looked away. "I would've let him fall. No hesitation."

Hiro didn't know what to say to that.

"I told you. Unlike you, I'm not a hero." Varian admitted as he felt Hiro's eyes on him. "I honestly don't know how you do it."

Hiro mulled over these words. "I guess… because I have good friends who support me and people to look up to. Who'll stop me from going too far."

Varian gave him a disbelieving smile. "People like your big brother I guess?"

"Yeah."

Varian shook his head. "Must be nice, having people around to help you when you need them. I'm not sure it'd make a difference in my case. I don't if anyone could have talked me down; not… not after what happened."

"Well," Hiro slowly said. "You never had a brother with you."

Varian nodded but didn't look at him, so Hiro contunited.

"Yup, it's a good thing my big brother was there today to help me out."

Hiro rested his hands behind his head as he said this and tried to act nonchalant, but he peeked out of the corner of his to watch Varian's reaction.

The other boy slowly looked up as realization dawned on his face.

Hiro smiled. "Thanks for being there for me."

"An-anytime." Varian answered with his own smile.

Hiro held out his hand for a fist bump. Varian returned it, the way Hiro and Baymax had taught him to do it. Then both boys wiggled their fingers and went "babalala", imitating their robot pal.

They couldn't keep a straight face when doing so though, and broke down into giggles.

"What's so funny?" Wasabi asked cheerfully as he entered the car.

"Oh nothing." Hiro snickered.

"Hey, hey, Wasabi, how about a driving lesson?" Varian pestered.

Wasabi rolled his eyes. "After the sport's car incident?"

"Not me, Hiro."

Wasabi turned back and looked at Hiro thoughtfully. "Well, alright, get on up here."

--------------------------

Hiro was finishing tidying up his room when he heard the familiar tune of La Cucaracha blaring down from the street below.

"Hey, Varian! Aunt Cass is back!"

He called to the other teen as he ran downstairs.

"Ok, all I got left to vacuum is the bathroom rug!" He called after before switching on the machine once more. "Be down in a sec!"

"Bye Tracey, see ya later." Aunt Cass called after her friend as she entered the cafe and her friend drove away.

She dumped her bags on the floor and let out a sigh of relief.

"Wooh, vacation will wear you out." She said as she leaned against the door.

"Hi Aunt Cass." Hiro ran to give her a hug. "Did you have a nice time?"

His aunt ignored the question "Oh Hiro, how are you, sweetheart?"

"I'm fin- ... I'm doing better."

"Did you hear about Callaghan?" she asked.

"Yeah, it was on the news today. They caught him."

"Yeah, Cruz texted me about it."

She stroked her fingers through his hair and pouted. "Do you still want to talk… about… well, you know?"

Hiro seriously considered it.

"Maybe later," he said, "I talked to Varian about it earlier today and I'm feeling a lot better now."

"Really?"

Hiro nodded his head.

"Well, I'm glad you two can open up to each other like that, and be there for one another. I'm also glad you two didn't burn the house down while I was gone."

Aunt Cass laughed at her own joke and Hiro joined in, but soon he weighed in with one more question, before moving on from the whole ordeal.

"Do.. Do you still hate him? Callaghan, I mean?"

Aunt Cass looked at him thoughtfully before answering.

"Yes." She nodded. "Do you?"

"Yeah." He sniffed.

Both aunt and nephew shared a silent moment for their grief as they came to an understanding before wrapping each other in a hug once more.

That was when Varian came down the stairs to join them.

"Hey!" He greeted, before embracing Aunt Cass in his own hug.

He practically lifted her off her feet as he did so, and for the first time Aunt Cass noticed that her adopted child was now taller than herself.

"What?" He laughed as he caught her giving him a funny smile.

"Nothing, I'm just glad to be back home." She said before wrapping both teens onto a group hug. "Oooh, I missed my boys sooo much, both of you!"

"We missed you too Aunt Cass." Hiro said.

"Yeah, next time you should just take us with you." Varian joked. "That way we can skip out on chores too, am I right Hiro?"

Hiro rolled his eyes at Varain's teasing. "Yeah, anything to avoid washing your dirty socks."

Even Aunt Cass couldn't help but laugh at that.

--------------------------

"Such a happy family." A woman's voice said as she peered at the Hamadas through her crystal ball. "Pity, their time is coming to an end."

Notes:

And Finally We Are Done with the Last Chapter! Woot!

But that's not the end of the story.

Be on the look out for season two, Ghosts of of the Past, where we'll meet more characters from the Tangled series, new villains, finally learn who this mysterious Boss is, and gain a new member of the Big Hero Six team!

You can find up dates at both the Rocks and Robot's discord https://discord.gg/yfVVrXjFW8

#Hiro Hamada #Varian #tangled #big hero six #bh6 #tts #of rocks and robots

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yikesharringrove · 4 years ago

Note

Steve waits a good week before telling billy he got diagnosed with depression. of course billy was the one who suggested therapy but it's still odd, saying it outloud. I'm TOTALLY not projecting when I say that obviously he grew up denying it, on bad days he couldnt tell himself 'oh I'm struggling cause I have depression' instead it was 'I'm struggling cause I'm stupid and no one loves me' so it's weird.. but good.. being able to confirm that maybe he isnt stupid and unlovable and maybe that's just what the now very real issue in his head was telling him. he has a very complicated relationship with his own mind.

“We need to have a talk.” Billy tried to keep his voice as light as possible.

It didn’t work though, based on the way Steve’s eyes went huge.

“Just about, I feel like something’s up. You’ve been weird for like, a few days, and I want to make sure you’re okay. That I, that I didn’t do anything.” Steve was chewing on his bottom lip. Billy reached out to softly pull it out from between his teeth with his thumb.

“I, uh, I went to the doctor on Monday.” Billy furrowed his brows.

Usually Steve was pretty up front with these things. Plus, when he was sick, he was all whiny and needy, making Billy take care of him.

Not that Billy didn’t love to o it but-

That’s not the point.

“Is there something wrong?”

“Well, I went because, because remember when I got that physical like, a month ago? Well my doctor recommended me to a, to another doctor. A specialist.” Billy’s heart was pounding against his ribs.

“Are you, is there something wrong?” Steve wasn’t looking him in the eye.

“It was a psychiatrist. He recommended me to a psychiatrist. Who has, uh, diagnosed me, with uh, with depression. With chronic depression.”

Billy had to sit down. He flopped in one of the mismatched chairs at their kitchen table.

He was expecting cancer, or something like that. Something tangible.

And this isn’t really news. Steve has had a certain, sadness to him as long as Billy’s known him.

But this is something that’s affecting Steve. In a big way, if he didn’t tell Billy about it.

“Okay.” Steve was staring at Billy’s right knee.

“Okay?”

“Well, I guess it makes sense.” Billy shrugged. “I’ve always kinda known, I think.”

“It’s weird I just, there’s this word, you know? Like there’s something. When I went in for my physical, I had that chart, with all the symptom stuff, and I just marked down everything, like, like weight and appetite changes, and, and fatigue, just like, stuff I thought was normal, and he was like how long have you felt these things? and I was all on and off since high school and he was like I think you have depression, and it just, I don’t even know how to feel about it.”

Billy didn’t either.

“Well, its a good thing? Like you said, there’s a word. And with a word comes help, and treatment.”

“It’s just fucking wild. Looking back on like, those days in high school when I just, couldn’t get out of bed, or the thought of having to talk to someone and fake being fine was just too much. It’s like, why didn’t I do my homework even though I knew failing an assignment was gonna make me freak out? It’s because I was depressed-or am depressed, I guess.”

“It explains your feelings for you.” Billy gets depression. He figures he’s dealt with it. Maybe not like Steve, with the same symptoms, but looking back on life in his father’s house, and the sheer hopelessness he felt most of the time, he figures that’s it.

“The doctor said it’s a medical condition. The chemicals in my brain are, are off. Which is why I can be happy in my life with you, but still be depressed, or-or, have happy moments, but not be fixed, you know?” Billy can picture Steve asking that.

“Yeah, that makes sense. And don’t worry, Baby. I’m not taking it personal.” Steve looked up at him, giving him a weak smile. “But, I mean, you know that I love you a lot, right? That I care about you?” Steve nodded vigorously. “Then, uh, why didn’t you tell me?” Steve shrugged.

“I was trying to process, I guess. I’ve always just kinda ragged on myself. Like I’d think that I’m having a hard time because I’m stupid, or I feel bad because I’m worthless. Stuff like that. That I’m unlovable.” Steve was back to staring at the floor. “And now, all those feelings, all the times I felt bad, or was struggling all of it, it was because of this. And even, even the ragging, like that was just my mis-chemicalled brain being, being fucking rude, if you ask me.”

Billy barked a laugh. It made Steve look up, made him smile.

“I’m not mad, just so you know. I can see how this would be a lot. I just love you. A whole lot.”

“I know.”

“And anytime your mis-chemicalled brain tries to tell you otherwise, I’m here to remind you.”

“I know that too.” Billy opened his arms.

Steve crossed the small kitchen to perch himself on Billy’s lap, sitting sideways with his head on his shoulder, Billy’s arms around him.

“So, what’s next?”

“Like you said, treatment. Therapy, I guess. They said maybe medication but I don’t really wanna be drugged out everyday.”

“I don’t know. It’s worth a try. And you won’t be drugged out. They’re jsut gonna help your brain be less mis-chemicalled.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“I’m always right.” Steve just hummed.

“I love you too.”

“Yeah, I know.”

#yikes writes #TW depression #steve harrington #billy hargrove #harringrove

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hains-mae · 5 years ago

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Flowers

(Damian x Reader) Soulmate AU

Rating: T

Ages: Damian and you are 16, everyone’s ages follow after.

Summary: Soulmate AU where the wounds on your soulmate turns into a flower tattoo on your skin, if it heals with no scars the tattoo goes away, if it heals with a scar then the tattoo stays. You are just an ordinary girl, with an ordinary life, so one might think it only makes sense that your soulmate is just as ordinary as you. But that isn’t the case. Especially not when your body is constantly littered with flowers. Some of them fade over time, some stay, but one thing is for certain – your soulmate seems to get hurt. A lot.

Notes: Hey there you guys. Recently I’ve been caught up in a Batman fever, and I can’t do anything about it. I ended up creating a challenge for my friend @mrevaunit42 which was an “Character x Reader” Soulmate AU. Seriously, it was all in the name of fun.

And then I got caught up in it, perhaps a little too much – and created this. I’ve never written a soulmate au before, though I really wanted to. (Now I have! Yay~) So please forgive my writing since I’m a little rusty, and I hope you enjoy.

Stay safe everyone.

Disclaimer: I do not own DC. If I did, I wouldn’t make it as confusing as it is now.

I woke up to a burning sensation on my lower ribs in the middle of night. Hissing in pain I slowly pushed my feet out of the warm covers and turned on the lamp beside my bed. Pulling up my shirt I assessed the damage.

It was purple lilacs this time, stretched across the middle of my torso going horizontally to my side. I winced as the tattoo completed itself and just as the heat came, a cold chill ran through it and down my spine. Somehow it soothed the burn.

God, another one? I frowned at the beautiful flower and sighed. It worried me that my soulmate was prone to getting hurt. Sometimes the injuries made sense, like when I found them on my knees, I could easily chalk it up to falling and scraping – but injuries like these were more difficult to decipher.

How does someone normal get hurt this way?

They don’t.

“Unless they’re a criminal.” One of my friends stated dryly days ago.

“Or a hero!” Another said quickly.

Needless to say, I wasn’t in a rush to find out. Whoever this person was, I knew from the start that they were trouble.

The next time I woke, it was to the early morning rays that escaped my curtains and played a fiery dance on my eye lids. I groaned and pulled the covers up wishing I could sleep in for a couple more minutes, but I knew I couldn’t.

A few weeks ago my school, Gotham Academy, announced that they were holding their annual science fair at a convention centre as opposed to the regular school gymnasium, because surprisingly enough, Wayne Enterprise offered to fund the event.

It was no secret that Gotham’s economy was hitting below the desired margin. Many people don’t have jobs which resulted in an influx of crime in the past years. And so Wayne Enterprise collaborated with Gotham’s Department of Homeland Security (DHS) to raise awareness and encourage young minds to strive for a better, innovative future. They shouldered the expenses needed and created an international affair, to top it off; Wayne Ent. also offered scholarships to future college goers and internships in all their branches.

Which was why I couldn’t sleep in today. I had project to work on. In line with our team of sponsors, I decided to invent a weapon that could help the GPD when catching criminals. A gun that projects thin plastic case marbles filled with a chemical concoction that erupts into a quick hardening foam upon impact. The foam itself is not toxic, but it works with catching and detaining. It turns as hard as stone but there was another type of compound that I was in the process of creating to counter act it as a measure of safety.

I got up and started my day.

“Good morning sweetheart.” My mom greeted as I entered the kitchen. She smiled warmly at me as she placed a plate of eggs and bacon on the table.

I couldn’t help but return the gesture, walking up to her and placing a kiss on her cheek. “Morning Mom, are you working tonight?”

“I have to, but don’t worry I’ll be leaving something in the fridge for dinner.”

I thanked her and took my plate into the living room. Turning on the T.V., I easily found the news channel and watched the latest reports on Gotham’s activities.

Mom sometimes had to work on weekends just to make ends meet, which was one reason why I was so hard to get that scholarship and hopefully the internship as well. The other reason was…

A family picture caught my eye in the middle of the news and I bit back a sigh. My dad, my mom, and me. We all were smiling at the camera.

Dad was part of the Police force and died during a heist. Reports stated he was running after the criminals and got shot before he could capture them. That was another reason I chose this as my project. Dad always wanted to fight for justice, hopefully this invention could help.

I finished up my breakfast and helped my mom with chores before I slipped into science mode and continued tinkering with the project. The projectiles were complete and I was able to make 3 in total, which I stored in a small box encased with extra padding.

It was around evening after my mom left that I got another burn. I dropped the screwdriver I was holding and bit my lip. Gasping for breath I pulled my sleeve and watched another flower blossom on my forearm.

The pain was gone in an instant and the cold tickled the skin that was branded. I sighed and slowly straightened my poster. This person, after all these injuries, they better not die before I meet them. I grumbled to myself when I realised I was short on supplies. Poor planning on my part.

I grabbed my bag and locked the front door before I headed out to the nearest hardware store, careful to keep my marks hidden from view. I’ve lived in Gotham my whole life, and I knew that standing out, even in the smallest way, would lead into trouble.

The walk to the store was short and uneventful, thankfully. There were only a few customers. I manoeuvred my way between the isles and picked up what I needed. After paying at the counter I hauled my goods and ducked back into the streets. I almost wished I didn’t stop when I heard that woman cry out for help. I was unarmed, unprepared, and every cell in my body screamed at me to walk – no – run away from the scene that was unfolding before my eyes.

But she was helpless. Clad in a trench coat and rain boots, she didn’t look like much but her bag was definitely designer. The thieves in question had a knife pointed at her face. There were 6 of them. All were towering and bulky next to her petite frame. Their menacing stares struck a cold shiver in me and my hand involuntarily clutched the projectiles I was working on in my pocket. I had a feeling it would be safer with me than it would be at home, however this was not how I imagined I’d first be using them.

The woman screamed again and I clenched my palm.

I sucked in some air and got ready to shout at the perpetrators – until I felt the wind rush past my ear.

In a flash someone had swooped into the scene and kicked the man holding the knife to the ground. The sound of blades being drawn stole my attention. It was Robin. He took a stance between the woman and the men.

“Run. Now.” He told the lady.

She whimpered and scrambled up to her feet dashing towards me, towards the entrance of the alley. She zipped past and didn’t stop running till she turned the corner. I should be running too. But my eyes were fixed on the fight that was about to happen.

Robin seemed no older than me. In reality there was no way he could win against 6 huge men. But then again, this was Robin. No normal teenager.

“6 against 1.” He mused, the grip on his katana tightened. “That hardly seems fair.”

The one who held the knife, possibly the leader of the gang, growled thickly. “Get‘im boys.”

They all rushed towards him at the same time, hands in the air and weapons ready. Robin whipped his blade and easily knocked two knives down, the remaining used their strength and threw punches that looked like it would strike anyone straight to next week. The masked boy effortlessly dodged all their hits. Crouching, jumping, twisting, exactly when needed and not a second too late. His movements were precise; a quick jab below the rib striking the kidney with the handle of the sword, a sharp slam of his elbow to the chin, and to close the deal with a blunt blow force to the side of the neck. The goon fell like a tree that’s been cut down.

I gaped in awe.

The others rushed to avenge their fallen comrade, but Robin was quicker and used his blade to disable them. He kicked one of them into the brick wall, a sickening crunch echoed as the goons’ head smashed into it, then a howl of pain when Robin sliced his back. I cringed at the sight of the blood. It was a superficial wound, at least from my vantage point. The cut was deep enough to hurt and draw red, but not enough to kill.

The next lunged himself and grabbed Robin’s wrist, the boy growled and kicked him the face, forcing to free himself. He couldn’t see the other one running towards them from behind, the weapon aiming straight for Robin’s back.

“Robin!” I found my voice and screamed. “Behind you!”

He did a roundhouse kick and slammed the head of the one holding his wrist, then using the momentum back flipped and kicked the one who was behind.

I sighed in relief.

“What are you doing just standing there?!” He shouted at me as he readied himself again. “I said run!”

That got all the men’s attention. The ones that fell got back up and huffed angrily.

“Get the girl!” The leader shouted. “We can use her.” His leer sent bile rushing up my throat.

I squeaked as 3 of them started to chase me. Finally my legs listened and I dashed across the street onto the other pavement.

They were too fast though, their thundering footsteps grew closer towards me. My lungs burned as I tried to inhale some much needed oxygen, physical sports like running really weren’t my thing. I nearly tripped on an uneven tile as a scream rippled out of my throat. I braced myself for impact but it never came. Instead I felt a rush of wind across my face and a lightness below me. The ground was getting further and further away.

I realised I was being carried. Looking up, I was face to face with Red Robin.

“God thing I saw you when I did or you’d be dead meat.” He said dryly as we landed on a roof.

“Th-thank you.” I breathed, trying to gulp in as much needed air as I could. “Robin – he –“ But I didn’t know how to articulate. The adrenaline rush was messing with my head, and I could barely think straight.

Yet Red Robin nodded, understanding. He jumped off the roof and shot his grappling hook. I peered down and saw the fight started to move, from the alley to the side walk. The goons cornered Robin into a store front and were relentless as they threw punch after punch. The other 3 that were chasing me were already fighting Red just below the building that he deposited me on.

I watched in horror as the glass shattered everywhere around them. They weren’t just normal gangs I discerned, they knew how to fight. And unlike the birds and bat, they didn’t mind taking a life.

Clutching the projectiles again in my pocket, I brought them up with trembling hands.

“I hope this works.” I whispered to myself and pulled out my elastic hair tie.

Hooking one of the orbs onto the elastic, I aimed for the goons attacking Robin, and pulled as far as the band could go. Willing my hand to stop shaking, I said a silent prayer and released my hold.

Time seemed to go into slow motion as it flew across the air. I held my breath.

It hit the ground between two goons and burst into a big foamy cloud of vibrant cobalt, instantly seizing the men and solidified their prison as the concoction cooled.

Both fights stopped for a split second, as they watched the chemical reaction, which now looking back was a mistake on all parties.

I gasped and thanked whoever was listening.

The leader roared and pulled a pistol. I felt my throat tighten as the gun set a bullet free.

Robin and I cried out in pain as the bullet dug into him. Tears threatened to roll down my cheek as I clutched my burning shoulder.

A birdarang zipped towards the leader, catching his wrist and making him let go of the weapon. With a grunt, Robin kicked him hard across the chest stealing the perpetrators breath and with a quick turn, smashed his foot onto the mans jaw, cracking it before letting him fall with a loud thud.

The fight continued and Robin easily subdued his last opponent. Then he ran across the street to finish up with Red. Both of them moved in fluid motions like well trained dancers as they fought while protecting each others weak spots. They took down the last 3 goons and tied them up just as the police sirens blared within the distance.

I jumped up from my spot and turned to run but stopped when I saw the two Robins in my path.

“You.” The younger one started. “You were the one who shot the…”

I nodded wordlessly, still feeling the adrenaline coursing through my body. A nasty red splotch caught my attention and I believe they both noticed as I glanced at it. My own hand went up and clutched my shoulder unconsciously, a cold sensation rippled through where the bullet was.

“Oh my god.”

---

to be continued...

Part 2, 3, 4, 5 (end)

#Damian Wayne x Reader #Damian x Reader #Soulmate AU #fanfiction #my fanfiction #challenge #DC #Batman #Robin #Red Robin #my fan fiction

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dollarstoreartsupplies · 3 years ago

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Songs That Remind Me of Fem Richie Tozier

Self Care by Penelope Scott A lot of people hate this song. This song fucks me up. That does not dissuade the fact that it’s Richie, after forgetting the Losers and trapped in show business as a woman who is desperate to please others. ‘When you're stressed, when things are just a mess When you're feeling kinda anxious or, like, maybe depressed I mean, maybe if you tried more, maybe if you tried Maybe if you took more vitamins, you would learn to live a fucking life’ - ‘Do drugs, have sex, tell your deepest darkest secrets to your friends Post cringe, buy guns, are you done yet? Fuck, not enough, cry a river, smash a cup But it's never ever gonna be enough For the people in the back row, but you still choose to listen Knowing damn well it's really not their decision’ - ‘Maybe if you try more, then you would deserve it Maybe if you fixed the whole world by yourself, then you'd earn it’

Are You Satisfied?- MARINA This is, in my heart of hearts, a rev Reddie song, but it’s also desperately normal Richie. It’s basically the same as Self Care just from a different perspective. Self Care is her on the inside but this one feels more like her public persona: a little arrogant and successful and falling apart in the kind of way tabloids like to speculate on. She’s never ever totally satisfied because the part of her memory that held the people who love her has been wiped away so she’s always clawing for more and more approval she never gets. ‘I was pulling out my hair The day I got the deal Chemically calm Was I meant to feel happy that my life Was just about to change?’ - ‘'Cause it's my problem if I want to pack up, and run away It's my business if I feel the need to smoke, and drink and sway It's my problem, it's my problem If I feel the need to hide And it's my problem if I have no friends, and feel I want to die’ - ‘Are you satisfied with an average life? Do I need to lie to make my way in life? Are you satisfied with an easy ride? Once you cross the line, will you be satisfied?’

Ibuprofen by Bears in Trees This song in terms of Richie once she’s reconnected with the Losers fucks. me. Up. They just love her so much you guys. ‘And Russ walks over, crying as well ‘Cause he heard me shouting how much I hate myself He said “No, not you! No, not you! You make us all so happy. You know that, don’t you?”’ - ‘I’m so emotional, I felt unlovable But they love me so dearly I must just be wrong ‘Cause they keep me, keep me safe’ - ‘Of love and be loved, show others they ain’t worthless I can love myself, I just need to learn it’ - ‘There’s a picture of Ben smiling so sweetly Didn’t know I took a photo, he just looked up to see me’ (like COME ON it's so PERFECT)

Eyes Warm, Eyes Wide by Lilli Furfaro I’m reluctant to add this one because it’s written about a pre existing character and her backstory so it almost entirely inapplicable but the parts that work? Oh boy do they work. They summarize everything I think about fem Richie as a character and I want to talk about it. ‘Eyes warm, eyes wide Eyes searching for a button She can push and press and cut And frame the smile it begets upon her wall Her chaos nonconforming It's a seed she's planted, rooted in us all’ - ‘She can think about the sad another time’ - ‘Eyes warm, eyes wide Eyes staring at the water She could be a better daughter She could stop that train of thought, put on a smile If she's fooling all her friends She can keep playing pretend a little while’ - ‘She's searching for an answer In a world that couldn't stand a chance Against the cake and courage in her heart’

#Losers Songs #fem richie tozier #god this ones brutal huh?#richie needs a HUG u mother FUCKERS

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realityhelixcreates · 4 years ago

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Beta, Theta, and Me Chapter 9: Magic Carpet Ride

Chapters: 9/?

Fandom: Thor (Movies), Avengers (Movies) Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Relationships: Loki x Reader (But not right now),Drug Use

Characters: Loki(Marvel) Additional Tags: A/B/O, Sorta, More Of An Exploration Of Life And Self Expression Within An A/B/O Framework, Loki Does What He Wants, But Loki Does Not Actually Do What He Wants, Antagonistic Bosses, Loki Has A Throne Now, But It’s Not What He Wanted

Summary: Loki, paragon of self-sacrifice, must face down a cultural taboo.

Loki stared ruefully at the little bottle of pills on the table in front of him.

“You've got to be kidding me.” he said, “Your weak mortal medicine will have no affect on me.”

Tony Stark shrugged. “Works on Cap.”

“I am not your Captain Rogers. We are worlds apart.”

“The guy's a never ending science experiment. We had to develop insanely strong meds for him because, in the event that he actually managed to get hurt, our strongest stuff couldn't help him. But I have it on good authority that this'll do the trick. That authority being your brother. King of Asgard.”

Loki glared in scandalized disbelief. “You are telling me Thor actually took one of these?”

“Took some persuading, but yeah. After he came back down, he was pretty sure they'd work on you too, despite your differences.”

Loki's eyes flicked to you, then back to Stark, then to the bottle. “Hold your tongue. We don't need to discuss this any further. I will not poison myself at your command.”

“It's not poison!” Stark insisted. “It's a painkiller and anti-inflammatory. It will help you heal.”

“You cannot expect me to degrade myself for your convenience.”

“No, I expect you to lie for your convenience.” Stark shot back. “Though I don't see how hiding this from me,” he gestured at the chair, the neck brace, “actually helped you at all. You don't get anything out of it. Anyway, you really need to start cooperating if you want to stay. I'm trying to be lenient, but the more you complicate things, the more likely it is you'll be discovered. I think we all agree that would be bad.

As for you, if you want to come back downstairs and rejoin society, we've always got space for you” he said to you. “The baristas have been asking after you.”

“No!” Loki burst, “If I must befoul myself with your medicines to retain my lodgings, then I require her assistance to oversee things while I am...impaired.”

It had been an accident. Or rather, a lapse in personal judgment. You had left Loki after dressing him one morning, to fix breakfast, and Stark had shown up. And because he was your boss, and owned the building, you had just let him in. That's right, you had helped out the landlord. Your parents would be ashamed of you. You were ashamed.

And the silent fury Loki had been radiating when he wheeled out into the seating area and Stark had gotten a look at him as he really was made you surprised that he wanted to keep you around at all.

Stark had given him an exasperated earful, and then left, coming back this morning with a bottle full of small pills. You couldn't even come close to pronouncing the complicated name on the label, but from what Stark was saying, they were the kind of thing that should never be taken by a normal person. Not if they had been made with Captain America in mind. Not if they were powerful enough to string out Thor.

You were surprised Loki was even pretending to go along with this, considering the cultural attitudes to chemical medicines in Asgard. Really, you fully expected him to order you to throw the pills away once Stark left.

When you brought him his tea, he sighed deeply, his expression a mask of utter melancholic resignation.

“Crush one of those accursed pills into a powder and add it to the tea.” he said woefully. “Stay by me as I suffer this indignity. Be forgiving of any upcoming transgressions, I implore you.”

“Hey, I'm sure it won't be that bad.” you said, grabbing a cooking spoon, and carefully breaking the pill down into a fine powder with the handle. “It won't stay in your system for very long. Your body will filter it out and flush it away, and you'll be clean again.”

You brushed the powder into his teacup, and stirred until it dissolved. Then you handed it over to Loki, who stared into the cup morosely.

“Won't it be good to not be in pain, even just for a little while?”

“I thought that many times, when I was in the clutches-” He stopped abruptly. “I've thought that many times. It is always denied to me somehow. There's always a catch.” He took a long sip of the tea, and sighed again. “And so I am tainted. At least the tea doesn't taste any different. You are getting better at that.”

“Here, have a muffin.” you offered him your freshest creation. “It says on the bottle that you're supposed to take it with food.”

He accepted the muffin with all the graveness of a prisoner at his last meal, but he thanked you graciously, and stopped you when you started to leave his side.

“I will be rendered a senseless fool by this foul poison. You must stay close, so that I do not do something utterly moronic, like throwing myself from the balcony on the assumption that I can fly. I might not actually survive in my situation, and I dislike long falls anyway.”

“You're scared of heights?” you asked, scarcely able to believe it.

“No,” he said haughtily, “I dislike long falls. It is different.”

“Why do they bother you?”

“That is personal.”

“I've seen your dick.” you pointed put.

“You would not be the first.” he said, matching you for vulgarity.

You rolled your eyes. “Whatever. Do you want more tea?”

Loki glanced into his empty teacup, bemused to see the bottom.

“Yes, I suppose I would.” he said, setting it down for you.

He had tried to teach you the fine art of pouring tea, and you had finally managed to do it without dribbling, but, as Loki put it, you also did it without grace. He didn't say anything this time, just tightened his lips in a sarcastic way, and took a sip.

At least you knew how to make tea to his specifications. It wasn't difficult, once you had figured it out. Just measurements and timing.

He had devoured his muffin, so you brought him another. Loki was extremely particular about flavors; not adventurous at all. Even banana nut offended his senses. But cream cheese met his approval in every application so far, even if he did complain about the texture of bagels.

“You'll have to get me an Asgardian cookbook, if this keeps up.” you said. “I might be able to whip you up something that reminds you of home.”

“I do not necessarily always want to be reminded of home.” Loki said. “And some of our dishes take many hours, even days to make. I need you for more than that. You cannot be in the kitchen at every moment.”

You would never admit it to anyone, but you got a surge of secret pleasure every time Loki said that he needed you. You'd always enjoyed hearing it from others, but it was so much better coming from a god.

Though it did make you wonder if the isolation up here was messing with your head a bit.

“Besides,” he continued, “enough cheese, bread, and meat will approximate the diet well enough. Asgardians have high metabolisms, and require many calories, and so do I. Our active lifestyles tend to make us big eaters as well, although I do not get my usual exercises these days.”

“If you would actually give yourself the time to relax and heal, you might be able to get back to that sooner.”

“Yap, yap, you nag like a bratty lapdog.” He scorned. Your eyebrows skyrocketed.

“Well gee,” you said with exaggerated shock, “if you don't want me here, just go ahead and say so. I'll go downstairs and be a barista.”

“No, you cannot leave me!” There was a distinct waver in his voice. “I will be polite. You won't leave me, will you? I didn't mean it.”

“Loki.” you said, suddenly feeling guilty. He sounded like a scolded little boy, on the verge of tears. “I'm not going anywhere. Don't worry about that. You should be more polite though.”

He reached out gracefully and took your hand.

“Dear lady...” he began, his words slightly slurred, and you finally realized that the medicine was taking effect.

“How are you feeling?” you asked, filling his tea again.

“Strange.” he said. “I feel light, but like there is a weight upon my eyes. Light, but like I cannot lift my limbs. One with this chair. Melting into the floor. I do not hurt...it's been so long...”

He really was starting to tear up.

You took his tea from his trembling hand and grabbed up a tissue.

“Here you go.” you said, dabbing his eyes gently. “Go ahead and enjoy it. Pain shouldn't be an everyday thing for you, if it doesn't have to be. You don't have to feel bad for enjoying a little bit of peace.”

“No, you don't understand. I don't deserve this. The pain was at least something familiar. I don't recognize this feeling. This lightness. It doesn't feel real.”

“Well, you are real, and I am real, and the medicine is real. The feeling is the medicine acting on your perceptions, so it's kinda real, it's just different than usual, that's all.” you patted his hand, and he grabbed for yours.

“Will this feeling go away?”

“Of course!” you laughed, “don't worry, this is just temporary. It will help your neck, and when you're healed, you won't have to take it anymore.”

“What if I can't stop?” he asked. “I am...not good at refraining from...indulgence.”

“If no one brings you anymore, what could you do about it?”

“If I am healed enough to remove this brace? To move about freely? What could I not do about it?”

“You know, that's a good point. I think we'll have to find you some of that ultra-powerful super weed the cops keep saying totally exists, but no one else seems to be able to find.”

He gave you a sideways stare. “More poisons?”

“It's to help free you from the other poison. But there are multiple strategies for getting clean, if that really becomes a problem. It's not like I've never seen addicts before; I'll help you if you need me.”

He reached for your hand again, and missed.

“Blessed thing.” he blabbered. “You are a draught of Alfar wine, brewed under the starlight. The fresh breeze through the forests of Vanaheim, just after sunrise. You are the faithful moon, pure as gold.”

“And you are high as balls.” you teased, bashful about the flowery praise. You really shouldn't be pledging any more of yourself, but the allure of being needed-wanted even, was as addictive as any drug.

“You are the only once who may see.” he said. “I want no one else to see me like this. Stark especially. None save you may witness my dishonor.”

“Loki,” you mock-scolded, “if you keep looking at it like that, you'll impede your own progress. You'll fight it subconsciously, and just slow your healing down.”

“How, pray tell, should I look at it then?” he asked.

You took his hand, which was still waving around after yours.

“Look at it as permission. Permission to relax, to let the guard down and just exist for a while. You have everything you need right here, you can just be. It's okay to take some time to just be.”

“Just be what though? What is worth it for me to be?”

You shrugged. “A prince?”

“In exile.”

“A god?”

“Blasphemed rather than worshiped.”

“How about...my master?”

He squirmed a little in his chair.

“I could perhaps do that effectively.” he said quietly.

#betathetaandme #loki (marvel)#loki x reader

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morganmeyers · 3 years ago

Text

Big Reading

So I did this super intense reading last night that was the biggest reading I’ve ever done and it wasn’t for just me so I’m going to share it here. If you see this, it might be for you so take what resonates and leave the rest.

IMPORTANT BEFORE READING: MEDITATE AND GROUND YOURSELF! There is a lot of information that is about to be unpacked in this reading.

I did this reading by using my Santa Muerte Tarot and Oracle cards. With the Oracle cards, I will be explaining what they mean, the significance behind them and what I saw in the cards while reading them. Songs also came up on my phone on shuffle, so Shufflemancy also plays a part in this reading as well. These songs came up before I started the reading that I felt were important:

Gabbie Hanna - Honestly

Halestorm - Uncomfortable

XXXTENTACION - Save Me

In total for all of the cards that got pulled, there was 44. The angel number 44 means: pay attention to your intuition & inner-wisdom as your connection with your guides is VERY strong at this time. This is a very prominent theme that goes with this reading.

Oracle Cards:

Darkness - 1 - Coming out of the shadows and showing your face. Standing in YOUR power. Meditation. Meditation. MEDITATION. The song Midnight Sky by Miley Cyrus came in my phone on shuffle mode. Some lyrics that stood out to me: “The Midnight Sky is the road I’m taking, head high up in the clouds. I was born to run, I don’t belong to anyone, I don’t need to be loved by you.

Masculine - 2 - Don’t be afraid to ask questions. You might not like the answers given, but take it in stride and make the best of it. The song Cancer by My Chemical Romance came up in my head when reading this card. When looking at it, I see a gas mask. Maybe it has something to do with being gaslighted by someone close to you? Either way there are some hard lessons that you’re about to learn. The color red is very prominent not only in this card but the reading in general. Red refers to Family, Love, partnerships, etc. Someone in your family/close to you isn’t telling you the truth or respecting who you are or your boundaries. Don’t take their shit. They’re afraid of whatever truth they’re hiding to come out.

Tlaloc - 9 - Tlaloc is an Aztec god of rain & fertility. He was very feared but also respected in the fact that he could water the fields of labor with one hand and could very easily destroy that same field with the other. In this card, I saw the color of green. Green is in reference to getting justice upon whatever your situation may be. Take no shit but do no harm. While you are being disrespected by whoever it is in your situation, it’s not a good idea to do the same to them. Whatever revenge you want to exact upon the person in question, don’t do it. It will bite you in the ass. The song Bow Down by the band I, Prevail came on: “I don’t really like myself, I think I’m breaking down.”

Mictlantecuhtli - 10 - I almost immediately saw Rafiki from the Lion King when looking at this card. Not everything is as black and white as you’d like it to be. You have to look at the other person’s POV before taking any sort of action. Watch what you say and do.

Tezcatlipōca - 12 - Tezcatlipōca is an Aztec god of night, war, education & temptation. I immediately paid attention to the cheetah print cloak. Maybe the action that needs to be taken upon whoever it is needs to be a fast action. He’s also missing a leg from a battle he fought. When meditating, you need to assess what things in your life you need to sacrifice or cut out when going into this next stage of your life. Not everything you can take with you. Some things you DEFINITELY cannot take with you. 2 songs came up with this card.

Eminem - Love The Way You Lie: “It Wasn’t you, baby it was me.”

Linkin Park - Bleed It Out: “Mama help me, I’ve been cursed, death is rolling in every verse, candy paint on his brand new hearse, can’t contain him he knows he works. Fuck this hurts, I won’t lie. Doesn’t matter how hard I try. Half the words don’t mean a thing and I know that I won’t be satisfied”

Huitzilopachtli - 13 - Huitzilopachtli is an Aztec god of the son & War. The sun is a very prominent theme in this reading. The color blue very much stood out to me with this card. Blue is in reference to Wisdom, increased mental powers & concentration. What drew my most attention was the 4 swords in the back. I went through my tarot deck because the 4 of Swords wasn’t originally a card that was pulled but when I did look at it, it was reversed. What I got from this card specifically, it looks like to me you’re taking the nails out of a coffin. Make plans to trust your intuition & take the nails/swords out of the coffin you previously stored away but do it with caution like the humming bird on the Huitzilopachtli #13 oracle card in the left corner so you don’t get burnt.

Chalchiuhtlicue - 14 - Chalchiuhtlicue is an Aztec goddess of water, lakes, seas, sailors, beauty & fertility. I saw the thunderbolts upon the top of the head first. The day of reckoning/judgement day is coming. 3 songs came up with this one.

Beatles - Yer Blues

AC/DC - Thunderstruck

AC/DC - Back In Black

Go with the flow because you’re at the point of no return and there’s no way for you to go back. At all. Embrace that power, that thunder, as your own.

I saw Mama Imelda & Hector from the Disney movie COCO when looking at this card as well and heard another song by Rihanna called Hate That I Love You (Feat. Ne-Yo). Some lyrics: “And I can’t stand you. Must everything you do make me want to smile? Can I not like you for awhile?” And “I despise that I adore you”

Tlazolteotl - 15 - Tlazolteotl is an Aztec goddess of earth, sex, moon & birth. The moon and the birth is what I saw first. A rebirth of sorts will take place. You need to do shadow work as your ego needs to be put in check but you also need to trust your intuition. If you feel something is off, it is. And it needs to be fixed.

Quetzalcóatl - 16 - Quetzalcóatl is the most important god in the Aztec pantheon. He is a god of Knowledge, dawn, merchants, arts & professions. I thought of Pepita from Coco. Pepita is an Alebrije which in Latin cultures is more so a spirit guide taking the form of an animal. Your spirit guides are trying to tell you something so you need to pay TF attention! Do not fear and do not give up. Through perseverance and insistence, you will reach the goal that you desire and that most of all, you deserve.

Shadow - 17 - Most of people that I know and know me, know that I’m afraid of Spiders. Always have been and probably always will. I saw spiders crawling all across the face on this one. Embrace your fears and face them head-on. Now is the time to do some HEAVY shadow work and work on yourself in general. Be mindful of your thoughts, feelings & words towards yourself and others during this time.

Intellect - 22 - Some of you will be getting MAJOR downloads in the coming days and or will be doing some heavy studying. Keep your brain busy and analyze the situation your facing with rational though. Yellow is also a prominent color in this reading and this card. Yellow represents thoughts, Wisdom and knowledge.

Flux - 24 - The song Carolyn by Black Veil Brides came up with this card. Lyrics: “I wished to god I’d known that I, I didn’t stand a chance of looking back in knowing why. A pain of circumstance.”

Breaking. Generational. Curses.

You’re doing it now. You’re working on yourself and putting yourself first before undoing everything else and that’s a good thing! KEEP GOING!

You have the world in your hands to take time and reflect on your lineage/ancestors.

Harvest - 27 - The sun in the corner. You will be able to eat the fruits of your labor one day and so will your future family/successors if you continue to go forth in braking those curses put upon your family line.

Art - 29 - Your ancestors and spirit guides are watching you in awe for doing the work you’re doing. They see you painting the sun card and creating your own happiness and they’re cheering you on. Keep doing the good work you’re doing.

Santa Muerte - 32 - Be absolutely sure that what you cut out in your life is what you want to be gone. Once it is, there’s almost no way of getting it back. Trust your intuition.

Tarot Cards:

Fool ⬇️

Magician ⬆️

Lovers ⬇️

Temperance ⬆️

Devil ⬆️

Tower ⬆️

Sun ⬆️

Judgement ⬆️

2 of Cups ⬆️

6 of Cups ⬇️

Page of Cups ⬆️

Knight of Cups ⬆️

King of Cups ⬇️

Ace of Pentacles ⬆️

2 of Pentacles ⬆️

3 of Pentacles ⬆️

4 of Pentacles ⬆️

5 of Pentacles ⬆️

7 of Pentacles ⬇️

King of Pentacles ⬇️

Ace of Swords ⬇️

6 of Swords ⬇️

Page of Swords ⬆️

Queen of Swords ⬆️

King of Swords ⬇️

2 of Wands ⬇️

3 of Wands ⬇️

6 of Wands ⬇️

Queen of Wands ⬆️

Like with the Oracle cards, you’re on a journey of self healing & breaking generational curses. You’re on a path that you can’t turn around and go back on. You need to keep walking forwards. Right now it seems like things in your life are in disarray and that’s for a reason. You’re on your current path and dealing with these issues head-on so that others that come after you, don’t have to, they’re gonna have other issues that need to be dealt with. However, the heavy load of the curses/trauma is being dealt with you now in this lifetime because you are the most capable even though it might not seem like you think you are. Going through the trauma is what’s going to bring you so much happiness and everything you could ever hope for.

You are so near the end of the finish line in dealing with everything that it’s so unnecessary for you to even attempt to turn around and undo al do the hard work you’ve already done. Why would you want to go back to all of the trauma? You don’t. Don’t sacrifice yourself for others who clearly don’t give a SHIT about you. FUCK. THAT.

Do what you believe is good for you and your higher self and go forth in doing things that you’re passionate about. Don’t let others lie to you and walk all over you. They don’t know you like YOU do. If you can sense that someone is going something that isn’t good or can tell that they’re not telling you the truth of something that’s going on, that’s most likely the case.

You need to assess what you’re willing to let slide and willing to take with you in the next chapter of your life cause you won’t be able to bring everything with you. And when you do and you set your boundaries by putting your foot down HARD, there will be others waiting for you on the other side cheering you on because you make it to the other side a FAR better person that where you were when you started your journey. Not everybody is worthy to walk with you if they continue to act the way that they do and you have to accept that or nothing will come of the changes you’ve made for your happiness.

#witchcraft #tarot reading #tarot cards #tarot #oracle #oracle cards #oracle reading #santa muerte #santa muerte tarot #Santa muerte oracle

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rpf-bat · 4 years ago

Text

Singing Songs That Make You Slit Your Wrists

Pairing: Frank Iero x Reader

Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort

Summary: Written for Gothtober 2020, Day 8: “From Inside”.

Linkin Park invites you, and the other members of My Chemical Romance, to join them on the Projekt Revolution Tour. But, when their song, reduces Frank to tears, you realize that something is wrong. He confides in you, about his heartbreak.

You sat in the dressing room, at the back of the venue, feeling sweaty and exhausted, but good. You and the guys had played a killer set tonight. The fans had loved it.

“Where’s Frank?” you asked, sipping on your water bottle.

“I think he went to go watch Linkin Park’s set,” Ray replied, wiping his face on a towel.

“Oh, okay,” you nodded. “I might go watch them play, too.”

Linkin Park were the headliners on this tour, so their set came after yours. They were a really talented band. You were honored that they had asked My Chemical Romance, to open for them. They were really great guys to hang out with, too.

You left the dressing room, and began walking towards the stage. You found Frank, just behind the curtain. Beyond the back of his head, you could see the band rocking out. They were facing the crowd, so their backs were to you. But, Mike and Chester’s voices, still reverberated off the walls. You could hear, that they were in the middle of a song off their second album - “From The Inside”:

Trying not to break, but I’m so tired of this deceit

Every time I try to make myself get back up on my feet

All I ever think about is this, all the tiring time between

And how trying to put my trust in you, just takes so much out of me

Take everything from the inside, and throw it all away

‘Cause I swear, for the last time, I won’t trust myself with you

I won’t waste myself on you!

As the instrumentals kicked in, Frank punched the wall. The drywall crumbled under his fist.

“Hey!” you gasped. “What are you doing?”

“Y-Y/N?!”

Frank’s head whipped around, when he heard the sound of your voice. When he turned to you, you saw that his face was streaked with tears.

“Frank?” you blinked. “What’s wrong?” There’s no way that he’s getting so emotional, just because of the song….

“Nothing’s wrong!” Frank insisted, wiping his eyes on his sleeve. “Just...go away!”

“I won’t go away!” you insisted. “You’re not the type, to get all weepy for no reason. Tell me what’s going on.”

“She deceived me, Y/N.” Frank rambled. “I can’t trust her...all my love was totally wasted on her.”

“Who are you talking about?” you asked gently, putting a supportive hand on his shoulder.

“My girlfriend,” Frank explained. “She’s cheating on me.”

“Oh my god,” you gaped, “are you serious? How do you know?”

“I...I just found out, tonight,” Frank stammered, beginning to cry again. “I left the dressing room, because I didn’t want you guys to see me like this. But, the song just made me feel even worse….”

“Sssh, it’s okay,” you soothed him, pulling him into a hug. He buried his head in your shoulder. “Frankie, you’ve got eyeliner all over your face. Let me take you back to the dressing room, and get you cleaned up, okay?”

“....O-Okay,” Frank sniffled, his voice muffled against your jacket.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

“....Where did the others go?” Frank wondered, as you reentered the back room.

“I think they said, they were going to go hang out with Mindless Self Indulgence,” you recalled. You grabbed your box of makeup wipes, off the vanity. “Will you come here, please?”

Frank walked over, and sat on the stool, by the mirror. You grabbed a wipe out of the pack, and gently began to wipe at his face. The black tire tracks were all over his cheeks. How long was he crying, you wondered, before I found him out there?

“I look like shit,” Frank said glumly. “I’m pathetic…”

“You’re not pathetic,” you assured him, wiping the last of the makeup away. “Look - you’re all better now.”

“Thanks,” Frank sighed. “I’m glad it was you, at least, who caught me crying like a girl, and not Gerard, or Ray.”

“I doubt that they would have made fun of you for it,” you pointed out.

“I know they wouldn’t,” Frank shrugged. “But….fuck, Y/N. I’m a mess.”

You pulled him into another hug, and he just sat there for a second, clinging to you for comfort. He smelled like sweat and cigarette smoke. That shouldn’t have been an attractive combination - but, you found yourself inhaling it deeply.

“....You know my friend Shaun, right?” Frank said, pulling away at last.

“Yeah,” you nodded. “He’s from the same hometown as you, right?”

“Right,” Frank explained. “So, I got a text from him, right when we came offstage, earlier. He went to the drive-in movie theater, in Newark, tonight, to see the new Halloween remake.”

“And, then what happened?” you asked.

“He looked at the next car over,” Frank went on, “and that’s when he saw her! He sent me a picture.”

Frank fumbled in his pocket, for his cell phone. He flipped it open, and held it up to you, so you could view Shaun’s picture message. The image was grainy, but you could clearly make out the face of Frank’s girlfriend. She was passionately kissing a man in the passenger’s seat.

“Oh my god!” your eyes widened, as you stared at the evidence. “Who the hell is he?”

“I don’t know,” Frank said miserably, “but he sure as hell ain’t me.”

“So, she’s macking on some other guy, while you’re away, on tour?!” you realized. “Frank….I’m so sorry….”

“How could she do this to me?” Frank sobbed. “Why wasn’t I good enough for her?”

“Hey, hey - you’re good enough,” you assured him, holding him again. “She’s the one, who doesn’t deserve you.”

Frank jerked away from you, grabbing for his phone again.

“.....Should I call her?” he asked hesitantly. “Should I tell her that I know what she did?”

“Yeah, I think you should confront her about it directly,” you advised. “I mean, it’s clear as day.”

“This is the type of conversation that I would prefer to have face to face,” Frank frowned.

“Yeah, but we won’t be home for another two weeks,” you reminded him. “You can’t just ignore it, until then.”

“The tour was almost over, damnit,” Frank swore. “I….I was really looking forward to seeing her when I got back, and spending more time with her. Now...it’s like, I’m not sure, if I ever want to see her again.”

“Then, tell her that,” you urged him. “I’ll be right here, by your side, okay?”

“Thanks, Y/N,” Frank said softly, taking your hand, as he dialed her number. You gave his hand a reassuring squeeze, as the phone rang.

“Hi, Frankie!” said an oblivious voice, when she picked up. “How are you, baby?”

“Don’t baby me,” Frank snapped. “I know what you did!”

“What are you talking about, sweetie?” the whore asked innocently.

“Shaun saw you at the movies, you two-timing trash!” Frank scowled. “How….how could you?!”

“Oh, yeah, I went to the movies, with my cousin,” she lied.

“Oh, really?” Frank scoffed. “You like to stick your tongue in your cousin’s mouth?”

“Shaun needs to learn that snitches get stitches!” she snapped. “Fine, he ain’t my cousin. But, he didn’t mean anything to me, Frankie, honest. You’re my number one.”

“If I’m not your one and only, I don’t want to be jack shit to you!” Frank cried.

“What, so, you’re breaking up with me?” his girlfriend asked. “Come on….please forgive me, baby! I swear it won’t happen again!”

“Yeah, it will,” Frank said miserably. “People like you never change....I thought I could trust you. But, this is what you do, behind my back?!”

“Well, maybe you shouldn’t go disappearing, for months at a time, then!” the girlfriend screamed back at him. “A girl’s got needs!”

“All I need,” Frank growled, “is for you to lose my number - you and I are through!”

He hurled at the phone at the wall, in a fit of rage. The screen shattered, when it made impact with the cement.

“Fuck!” Frank cried. “Fuck, I’m so stupid!”

“It’s okay,” you said quickly, “Screens are easy to fix. We can probably take it to a repair shop tomorrow, before we get back on the tour bus, and move on to the next city. Or, we could just get you a whole new phone…”

“I don’t care about the phone,” Frank said, sinking to the floor. “Just..leave it.”

“Are you sure?” you asked, already handing it back to him.

“Yeah, just set it down,” Frank said, putting his head in his hands. “I….I’m stupid, for trusting her. I thought she really loved me.”

You put the phone on the counter, and sat down beside him.

“Frank, I’m so sorry that she did this to you,” you said sincerely, putting an arm around him. “You don’t deserve it.”

“What if I do, though?” he said sadly, letting his head slump against your shoulder. “I mean, she’s right. I’m never at home.”

“She knew what you did for a living, when she decided to date you,” you reminded him. “You’re a musician. You’re going to tour a lot. There’s nothing that you can do about that.”

“But, when I was home, I was good to her,” Frank sniffled. “I worked so hard, to show her that I cared. When the album went platinum, I even bought her a car.”

“And she chose to screw some other guy, in the backseat?” you spat, revolted. “She really is a whore, Frank. She was probably just after your money, in the first place.”

“.....You don’t think she ever loved me, at all?” Frank asked. The thought seemed to make him even more depressed. Tears began to well up in his eyes again.

“...Fuck,” you swore, realizing you’d inadvertently twisted the knife. “Fuck, Frank, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

He started wiping his eyes on his sleeves again.

“Here,” you offered, pulling a handkerchief from your pocket. “Use this instead.”

“....Thanks, Y/N,” Frank said, taking it, and blowing his nose. “Thank you for being here for me, for that….breakup call. Fuck….it’s really over…..”

“It is,” you nodded, “But, that’s probably for the best. You don’t want to be, with a person who treats you that way.”

Without warning. Frank dove into your lap, burying his face into your shirt, as he began to cry harder. You held him tight, and gently stroked his dark hair.

“.....What if nobody else ever wants me?” he sobbed. “Why aren’t I lovable?”

“You’re lovable,” you whispered into his ear. “Frankie, any girl would be lucky to have you!”

The truth was, you’d had a crush on him, for the longest time. But, you knew he was already taken, so you’d never acted on these feelings. You told yourself, you were fine just being friends. Secretly, you’d been so jealous of his girlfriend...but, you thought he was happy with her. You didn’t want to mess that up for him.

But, tonight, you considered, she messed it up, all on her own. Now..he’s a single man….

“You’re just saying that to make me feel better, Y/N,” Frank frowned. “The truth is….I’m nothing special.”

“That’s not true at all!” you insisted. “You’re an amazingly talented guitarist….you’re a kind person, and you’re fun to be around. You’re honest, and loyal, and….and, god, you’re so handsome….”

“I’m handsome?” Frank repeated. He picked his head up, and looked you in the eyes.

“Yeah,” you nodded, blushing. “Your hair looks so good, since you started growing it out. And I love the tank top you wore onstage tonight….it shows off the tattoos, on those muscley arms. When you started licking the microphone….I swear to god, I almost dropped my sticks.”

“Really?” Frank chuckled. It was the first time that you had seen him smile, all evening. “You thought it was sexy?”

“Yeah….,” you breathed. “I think you’re sexy, Frank. I always have. If I had you….I would never dream of kissing anyone else.”

“Then, have me,” Frank whispered. He leaned in, and closed the distance between you. You tasted the salt, of the tears, on his lips. And yet, the kiss was so sweet.

You pulled him closer, deepening the kiss, and winding your fingers into his hair. Was this real?

He pulled away after a moment, gasping for breath.

“Promise me,” he panted. “Promise me, you’ll never hurt me, like she did. Promise me you’ll always be true.”

“I promise,” you vowed. “Frankie, I’ve wanted you forever….I’ll be yours ‘til the end.”

This was exactly what he needed to hear. He crashed into you again, harder this time. You kissed him, and kissed him, until your lips felt sore. You would show him exactly how loved he was - even if took you all night long.

#frank iero x reader #frank iero imagine #band member reader #gothtober #i stayed up til 1 am writing this....fuck #sorry if it's incoherent lol

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