#it’s honestly kinda hilarious. but also. annoying

[tkdbimagines]

Hey so... Me Again lol (which one? You'll never know). I had to come back to your inbox since I enjoy reading your stuff A LOT! and I had a thought. Cockwarming... Who enjoys it, who can stay like this for hours, who can't and instead ends in boomshakala with, ect? Or just with one ghoul of your choice as a little os. Go wild. Go creative. I just love your stuff

A/N: alright yeah i can work with this, lets see what we got here

Cockwarming Headcanons

Stays For Hours

Jin: I'm a lil torn here actually but I think he'd definitely use it as some sort of punishment at the very least, and if that's the case he's got all the patience in the world. He'll probably snap at some point but he's making damn sure you do first and he'll still make you wait after.

Tohma: Probably the best at it honestly, he's nothing if not a patient man AND he likes annoying you and causing you problems. He just likes seeing your frustrated face and lil sounds and it just makes him want to make you wait even longer :c.

Alan: He's got better patience than I think even he will give himself credit for, honestly. Though, I think he's mostly in it for the intimacy's aspect, not the sexual one. He just likes how close you feel because of it. That being said, if you start squirming around and teasing him, I cannot guarantee your safety.

Sho: Oh he's a bastard sometimes, he'll do it just to tease you. This is a source of amusement for him, he thinks its hilarious seeing how worked up you're getting just by him being inside you. Don't think whining or complaining will help it just finds it even better. He'll give in at some point, but it'll be a while.

Ren: Honestly put a game in front of him he might even forget he's inside you to begin with. It's probably some sort of cute bonding activity except for the you know. cockwarming aspect but it's fine. However he is one you can easily goad into fucking you if you move around a bit so have fun!

Ritsu: I feel like he'd just check out and start thinking about the cases he's working on JHGHJKJHJK. Like he's a lil insane like that but it helps keep him calm and patient which is good because otherwise you might be driving him insane, it's so fine. Probably another one you can goad by moving around just not as easily.

Subaru: Sweet sweet boy just likes feeling close to you, this is definitely 1000% just for the intimacy aspect he's not trying to tease you or anything he just likes feeling you :c. That being said he will never deny you anything so if you want him to do something he will but if not he's perfectly content staying like this for as long as possible!

Haku: Kinda similar to Tohma and Sho here, he's definitely doing this because he likes teasing you KJHGHJKLKJHG. He'd be the type to whisper filthy shit in your ear too while running his hands across your body to really rile you up while he was at it. He's a lil insane sorry to say but don't worry even he has his limits KJHGHJKJH.

Ed: This annoying ass vampire pretends he's too old to move. You know he's not, he knows you know he's not, but he's just like this he's irritating. That being said he'll also hold you in place so you can't move, wrapping his arms around you because 'you feel so nice he doesn't want to let go'. He will not let you win and is probably the one most likely to go literal hours godspeed.

Rui: I'm a lil torn on him too because I'm not sure how much he's really doing this to begin with, but I think he could if you wanted him to. Living with Ed gives you a lot of patience after all but the second you want more he's all for it so he's really just going by whatever you want.

Jiro: I mean, are we really surprised by this? He's so chill about everything so naturally he'd probably have an insane about of patience regarding this as well. And if he gets to enjoy seeing you squirm and let out little noises because of him, well, that's just a bonus c:.

Gives In

Luca: I think he would give it an honest try. I think like Rui he wants to do whatever it is you want him to, and if it's cockwarming, well he might not quite get it but anything for you! However, the feeling of you wrapped around him is so... He apologizes but quickly asks if he can move pretty soon after, though he does last a little bit at least!

Kaito: Alright we all knew he was going here, I'm not sure he'd last even a minute before having to move. He'd want to give it a genuine try, he would, but well. You probably both knew how this was gonna end when you asked him it's fine. It's worth it in the end anyway you both get to enjoy it <3.

Leo: Okay much like Sho, he's a bastard, even more so actually. However, he also doesn't have a lot of patience. So what I think he does, is he talks big, acting like he's not gonna move for hours or that he'll edge you for just as long, but in reality he does just enough to drive you insane so that you'll beg for him to move and it'll look more like he's giving you what you want rather than him giving in.

Haru: Don't do this to him, he's already stressed out as it is. Plus, he's got so much energy I don't think he could sit still long enough for it if he tried. If you do try to do this expect him to try to work you up even more, to convince him to let him move that way he can make both of you feel good :c.

Towa: I don't think this is Towa's thing honestly. Maybe as a more relaxing thing than anything else but I don't think he gets anything out of it. He much rather prefers moving inside you or maybe you moving on him, the specifics don't really matter much just anything other than staying still.

Romeo: Ha. Another one to talk big only this time he actually tries to follow through but can't. It's not his fault you feel so good clenching around him! He'll blame you for him not being about to last without moving, thrusting into you roughly while complaining about how insane you drive him.

Zenji: I think he's like Kaito, he'd want to try it for your sake but in reality, he just can't do it. He'd apologize like a thousand times for not being able to give you what you want but well, it's not like you're mad at this outcome either. He'll more than make up for it with multiple rounds as well so ! Alls well that ends well.

Lyca: Oh, poor boy does not get what the appeal is. He'll tell you straight up too when you ask him, he does not see what's so great about it. Once he tries it he gets it even less, why would he torture himself like this when you feel so good and he could be moving right now to make you feel good too? Yeah the frustration takes over on this one but it's so fine.

Yuri: Romeo part two, he talks so big and acts so tough but like. He's giving in we all know he's giving in. Once again he's very frustrated with not being able to live up to what he was saying, but well. Now you get to make up for it since you've wasted his time he could've spent researching for this nonsense. Either way do you really lose?

Weird Taiga Category

Taiga: It largely depends on how Taiga's feeling at that exact moment. Sometimes he won't bother with it at all and just starts thrusting rapidly the second he's inside you. Other times, he's got you close to tears before he even so much as moves a single inch, laughing at how pathetic you sound. You really do never know what you're gonna get with him which is why he had to be in his own category.

[mellomadness]

I think it’s very funny whenever people try to scare me with ingredient lists. Like, buddy: I’m a physical artist as well. You ever looked at a safety data sheet for common paint?? You know how much shit you should actually be wearing a full respirator for before even entering a room and yet people just full on inhale the shit? No ventilation?

Just sayin, it’s gonna take more than a little “oh you shouldn’t use this thing bc it has a chance of exposing you to lead/cadmium/carcinogens” when half the shit I’ve worked with on a daily could end my life if I don’t take my tools seriously

[jojaxcola]

Begging for your opinions on Harvey

I like him!!

I think it's cute to see him has the older brother figure Maru wishes she had

I also think it's hilarious that he and the other older bachelors just get kinda roasted by that one secret note. If i found an anonymous note that described me as "really anxious and weak" i would have probably left town

His "are you sure this is healthy :/ :/ :/" comments annoy me. which IRL would suck but i actually love when fictional characters are irritating (it's a plus in my book, it's just fun)

Him referring to himself as "Dr. H" on the radio is so endearing. That and Sam calling him Uncle Doctor

Him doing dance aerobics sessions with the ladies is so cute. It's honestly really funny to me that he's desperate to keep it a secret and yet he's attending with who i am pretty sure are the town's biggest gossips

[evilkitten3]

#shout out to @Obihoe cause this started as a tag comment on one of your posts that got WAY too out of hand. just like old times lol#team 7#haruno sakura#sakura haruno#sasuke uchiha#team crackhead#naruto#naruto uzumaki#sasusaku#doesn't have to be but like. Yeah#for the record no disrespect to my boys Naruto n Kakashi I love them dearly. but like. they got their issues. that's half the fun of team 7#And Sakura has her problems with Sasuke too!! But her problems have nothing to do with understand him or his motivations or his personhood#and more to do with. Well. her absolute dogshit empathy. Emotionally disregulated ass.#'if you leave me I'll feel just like you did when your parents died' My beloved. Iconic. Great line. No notes. She's really just still so#inexperienced and naive that means she can explain and predict and KNOW him and his actions but still not empathize. She can say shit#like that with a straight face because she's never FELT loss like this before (except that minute she thought he was dead on the bridge)#so she can't imagine a worse pain. Just assumes it can't GET worse because she has no emotional concept of 'worse'. so it must be the same#she's literally the only person with a chance of convincing Sasuke to take her with him to Orochimaru because he's SASUKE of course she#knows all the right pressure points and keywords and concerns and stuff that she needs to convince him.#she's literally playing a little diolouge tree game with him. And maybe even winning up until that line! it's the dealbreaker

all of this!!! pre-shippuden sakura might've been crazy obsessed with sasuke but she also Understood him on a very strange level. like i think one of the biggest missed opportunities in the series was letting them have more bro moments bc sakura absolutely could've been sasuke's bestie

An interesting little fun thing with team 7 is that you assume that Sakura's gonna, like, woobify and simplify Sasuke by putting him on a pedastal,cause her goal is centered around him and shes a 12 y/o fangirl so like of course her understanding of him is skewed cause she doesnt see him as a person, just an object of affection, right? She's can't get Sasuke, can't imprint on and/or traumabond with him like Naruto and Kakashi do. They don't see him with rose tinted glasses, because they've lived through their own Horrors and empathize with Sasuke's experience.

......right?

WRONG lmao!! They have too many ghosts!! Naruto's single-minded codependent ass won't get out of his own way long enough to see Sasuke for who he actually is, only able to empathize with the parts of his trauma Naruto relates to and not really capable of understanding him outside of the context of himself (because Sasuke is. His other half). And Kakashi is far too jaded to be fair to him!! He can't decide if Sasuke is gonna end up as a mini-him or a mini-Obito or maybe a mini-Itachi, but either way he ALSO is too traumatized to see Sasuke AS SASUKE.

meanehile SAKURA'S autistic ass may have dogshit empathy, but you know what she does have? A special interest in sasuke. Nothing better to do then give herself a degree in Uchihaisms. She can write character studies about him. she can read his soul. Whenever she says something about him she is right. Every fucking time! She is RIGHT!!!!

'sasuke would NOT compliment me this directly or explicitly express worry unprompted, especially if it gets in the way of his goals' correct.

'Sasuke shouldn't hide that curse on his neck its not healthy BUT if I tell anyone about it he'll never trust me again, which might be even more dangerous for him then the curse mark. Like he can probably handle the curse mark but no one else can stop him from ripping peoples arms off.' correct.

Speaking of! 'Sasuke would not hurt me even when he seems to be...possessed? whatever the only way to knock him out of it is to present myself as Alive and thus something to be protected rather then something to be avenged, because he gets really stuck in his own head about revenge' CORRECT

'hey so um. like. Sasuke's gonna leave Konoha. I'm not sure anything can stop him at this point and honestly I'm kinda starting to doubt anything should, so the only thing I could possibly do to help him at this point is ALSO defect.' CORRECT!!!!

[bomber-grl]

A winter night with Damian Wayne

CW: reader is really lovey dovey and embarrassingly bold

Authors note: I’m aware it’s barely October , I want winter neow

It had never occurred to you how sensitive Damian was to the cold until he knocked on your door a few days ago, requesting to cuddle on your bed. Now,a week later you hear a knock at your door.

You get up from your bed, going from laying to sitting upright.”who is it?” You call out.

Without a second thought the door swings wide open.“Who else?” Damian says this with a very annoyed tone, almost enough to make you laugh considering his wild bed hair and the Jammie’s that he’s in.

Still you choose silence over him getting upset over being teased.

“Bad dream?” You asked. “No” he replied and then crawled onto the bed and besides you as if it were his own.

You choose to ask another question, “cold?” He glared at you and answers “here.” He grabs your hands and places them on his face, they’re freezing. “Does that answer your question, I always come here because you’re so warm.”

“Really? That’s the reason you come and visit me at night? Not any other reason? “ You ask this knowing the only reason he ever comes late at night is to cuddle and bask in your affection, still it doesn’t hurt to tease, right?

“Shut up before I leave” he says this but you know damn well he wouldn’t (🤭)

“Sureee… well here” you grab the other blanket and cover Damian with it.

He snuggled in next to you and intertwined your legs with one another, he faces you and begins telling you random things that happened throughout his day despite his very indifferent reactions to your affection.

“ Yknow, I saw this super obese squirrel, it was honestly concerning. why would people continue feeding it when it’s already obese?”

Gosh you love him.

Well soon he quiets down and it kinda concerns you. However, before you get the chance to ask he says something.

“Yknow, I did have a nightmare. I know I denied it when you had asked but I actually did. I was also cold, so that wasn’t a complete lie.”

You face him, “do you want to tell me about it?”

He visibly hesitates but then continues, “something…not so good happened to you and me.”

He doesn’t elaborate, and you pull him into a hug. You don’t say anything and just hold him, and although you don’t know it, he really appreciates it.

You pull away “hey Damian, you smell really good yknow? Especially your hair.” He laughs.

Oh his laugh

“Shut up you weirdo” he says this while stifling his laugh. Thank goodness you brought the mood up again.

“Hey Damian”

“What is it?”

“I really really like you” you say this, emphasizing the “really”. Damian’s face was hilarious, although it was dark you could still see it through the moonlight creeping through the window.

To say he was hardly blushing would be a lie.

“Oh, shut up” he pushes you away and turns the other way, but then you grab him.

“Hey look at me”

“N-no get away!”

“Why not? Scared I’ll see your cute face!” This calls his attention and he turns to face you.

“I’m not cute whatsoever!” Now his eyebrows are furrowed accompanied by his very much blushing face.

You grab his hands and trap them “yes you are”

“No I’m not!”

“Yes you are”

“How?!” Damian’s totally falling for your teasing

“Well for starters you’re so cute that whenever I see you I just want to kiss you” you pull him closer.

You swear you hear him whisper something under his breath

“Huh? What’s you say?” You tease

He doesn’t even bother looking up at your eyes, instead he stays staring at your lips.

“I said, then why don’t you? Why don’t you just kiss me already?”

Now it was your turn to get flustered, and you’re not the only one. You guess that really took a Damian out since he now refuses to look at you.

“Really?” You ask just to make sure

“Yes!” He responds embarrassingly fast

You lean forward and you and Damian’s lips collide. He’s so stiff but as you continue kissing he loosens up with your lips against his you begin to hear him let out little pants in between, then you separate.

Damian’s cheeks are flushed and you can only imagine what you look like right now. You suddenly become aware of the time and look at it on your phone.

It’s already 3:00 a.m

“Hey Damian, I really liked our little make out sesh, if we can even call it that, but I think we really need to go mimis now” you show him the time.

“Yea alright…just one more?” He asks.

“Yea” you lean in and kiss him once more, neither of you miss how your lips lingered on his but neither of you mentions it.

He lays down on his back once again as do you, you get the blankets over the two of you and get comfortable.

You snuggle into Damian as he does to you, and you both go to bed with the comfort of each others warmth.

-

You both wake up the next morning and when you go down into the dining room where all the batfam are Alfred asks you guys “sleep well?” Queue Tim bursting out laughing and everyone giving you knowing looks.

———————————————————————————

Authors note hi guys! Hope you enjoyed and if there is any spelling mistakes feel free to point it out! :)

[haveihitanerve]

I figured that I would actually provide the source material to the stuff im commenting on, so uh yeah, here ya go, more SFTH nonsense with my thoughts bc you guys actually seem to care and enjoy them strangely enough???

anyway yeah, you know the drill, dont care about my dumb little lizard brain squeals of joy, dont click the keep reading button bc its a lot lol :)

those of you who do(thanks) and continue!!!-

“One of you… is hosting a party…” Luke looking between them like ‘who tf is gonna move’ while AJ is literally already half out of his chair because he knows they’re gonna make him do it-(literally a quote from Tom[not verbatim but close] “we always make AJ guess, because he… has the most trouble with it, and thats a joy”)anyway-

Sam’s eyebrow raise at Tom across the stage

“Balding” whoever said that- i love you. Sam, of course, volunteers, he’ll never pass up an opportunity to rag on one of his besties and we love him for it

His grin, once again across stage, to Tom

“Vampire bugs bunny.” toms face- and Luke immediately pointing it out

“He can do Bugs Bunny, I cannot.” “you can do bugs bunny cant you” help the fact that they just know  all this ahhhhh <333333

“Oh shit, Which means I’m balding…” don't lie tom you cant wait to annoy AJ with this

“What do you want Luke to be?” Tom you evil evil genius

“This is for giving him balding-” don't act like its karma Tom this is all you ever wanted

“Someone who’s convinced he’s tall.” whoever said that, marry me- you're hilarious and clearly have good taste if you're at this show

Luke also laughing at the joke is a joy

Tom pacing as Luke takes control again, literally grinning giddily with excitement ugh they clearly love what they do so much and its so pure

Toms smile at “yay!” idk its just pretty

Aj idk what kind of accent this is but im loving it

But tf were those hand movements- are we wrapping presents? 

Ok even he broke at it, and sam was grinning- luke laughed, very nice

So im not a big bugs bunny person but even i can kinda catch on to what sams trying to do- very clever, im soooo many levels of curious to know if aj can guess it

“Carrot” !!!!!!he said CARROT!!!! YAY close

Tom crossing the stage to enter from the same door as Sam-honestly i cant with their stagecraft anymore help-

Also the doorbell is soooo much higher for tom than it was for sam- sams was at his chest, toms was above his head anyway

“Careful.” AJs glance up into the cosmos to figure out what tf that means and how its a hint

Toms doing great job of being insecure about his hair, loving it, and the audience is eating this up

“This guy sucks and i should know about that” AJ’s frozen face of fear because what is he trying to tell me, quick what does that mean- oh shit im screwed-

“Other front door.” yep! Theres the stagecraft comment- Tom dodged it quite obviously but Luke had to go for the joke

PFFFFFF oh wow Luke is doing a brilliant job of being tall, truly

“I was just looking in the mirror and I couldn't see him behind me.” oh i completely forgot about the vampire bit- thank you tom-

Also sam helping him out with the “ting!’ is great, we love to see them helping each other (for once lol)

“All of the characters of the looney tunes” oh aj so close

“Uh, the bunny one.” “oh please no!” XD NOOOO AJ!!! COME ON!!! I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!!

Luke breaking as well for it is the best 

Aj having to turn to look at him like “why did you let him choose this character- idk who this is.” 

“..lots of creatures” Luke literally folds, as Sam does the classic disappointed covering his face with one hand and tom has to walk away, classic

The way they join behind AJ like moral support kills me-

“Oh no you're really annoying me you're really---*expectant waiting* [bugging me]” nope aj is lost “fuckin-” now sam has to walk away LMAOOO

TOM LITERALLY ALMOST WALKING OFF STAGE IS INSANE

“Its like surveillance” aj- please, im begging you- we’re all begging you- go. simple. 

“Its called they piss you off.” Luke walking to the front of the stage so that everyone can see his disappointed head hang is crazy

“BUGS!!!” LADIES AND GENTLEMEN HES DONE IT AGAIN!!!! 

Oh no… oh no, aj please- please get it- please

“Bugs bunny.” YEAH!!!! YES YAY WOOHOO!!! HES DONE IT!!!!

Tom finally getting his moment to bring up his excellent addition- “its so crazy, i couldn't see him behind me in the mirror.” also walking to the front of the stage, thats gonna be a pattern

SAM LITERALLY KISSING AJ ON HIS BALD HEAD OMG IM GONNA CRY OF CUTENESS WHATTTTTT

MY HEART

“Hey my bald friend over here,” yess!!! Two in one!!! Nice work!!!

“Thats  your quirk.” man has never been so insulted in his l i f e 

Tom shrugging in answer as AJ smiles in disbelief is amazing

“I've got a pretty good angle.” while looking at the floor is what gives me life luke never change

“Is it like me ten years ago?” luke and tom both breaking at that- also, side note, they've known each other ten years to bring it up casually and have witnessed aj balding- moving on

Tom literally having to hug AJ after he guesses right XD i adore these little fucks so much

“You are so buff right now man.” Aj confused as to if this is real or…??? “Ok-?” laughs. oh these ridiculous goobers

“Fat friend.” wrong- wrong direction dude- up, not sideways🤭 so close

“All through this” still looking down, gestures to the space above his head that does not have body as much as he would like it to be

Luke having a breakdown on stage about an issue that he genuinely gets ragged on so much for- im losing my mind omfg-

“Tiny giant.” luke losing it again- and i gotta say thats a pretty nice way to describe it, i think he gets the point

Tom leaned forward in anticipation, the cutest smile on his face, sam leaned back, trepidatious 

“Im really- Im not *moves to the front of the stage and yells at the audience* tiny okay???” lukes loosing it niow

“Its very funny isn't it?” oh no, hes pacing and breaking the fourth wall- oh no

“Cause hes tall-” Tom perking up, “oh look! Im being included back in the sketch!” “and hes a normal height!” AJ isn't even bothering to think anymore, just enjoying the show

“Hes only 5’10” yes!!! Call him out Luke!!!

“And yet somehow Im a fucking short guy!!!” i just love the other three dudes expression in this scene, just pure delight at Luke finally snapping(albeit jokingly) and being like ‘yeah… tough luck’

Also, love Luke casually including the people no longer in the sketch back into it just to make a point and call out his legitimate grievances, love it

“Im not short!” oh now hes back in it ok-

“I don't know if im talking to a character or luke right now-” Tom and Sam breaking before he even finishes the sentence lol

“I don't know either.” oh poor baby XD

“Luke,” genuinely starts to address him by his actual name, gods i love them- he was about to legitimately comfort him before sam came in- i know it(or insult him further but like wtv, same thing lol)

“Connnn-vict!” Luke trying to speak and then giving up- AJ!!! Vince! Not Vikt!!!

YAYYY!!!! HE DID IT!!!!!! 🥳🥳🥳

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this segment of me losing my mind about SFTH and their incredible bromance and also humor, thanks for tuning in, see you next time(maybe, if you guys still want it lol)!

@dawn-speckled you wanted it last time, hope you want it still??? anyway, thanks for reading, it means a lot, and byebye 👋

[literallythegrabber]

Could you rank the TBP boys about how who is the fastest to slowest to confess? Thanks for reading and writing : )

thanks for requesting! I'm aware that this post came in months ago, but I was swamped with school and sports, so sorry. enjoy!

Bruce

I think Bruce would be the quickest to confess due to his confidence.

His personality plus his general popularity with girls would definitely fuel his ego, so he wouldn't think too hard on confessing.

I think he generally just gets along with all people, no matter their personality, so if u were to be more stoic or quiet, it wouldn't stir him up when it comes to reading u.

He's good with social cues, so if u wanted a big, flashy confession with a lot of attention, he'd cook up something big. If ur more like me and would prefer something more private and intimate, then he'd take u to a secluded area and pronounce he feelings for u without being too cheesy.

Billy

I think Billy would confess next because I dont think he cares about rejection.

Like he would want you to say yes, and would obviously be disappointed if you said no, but he would get over it fairly quickly.

He'd probably write something sweet in a newspaper or something and deliver it to ur house, praying that ur parent/parents don't notice it.

Sorry if his seems lacking in a way. He just doesn't get enough screen time for me to get a good judge of his character, other than him being hilariously sassy.

Vance

I think Vance would kinda be in the middle.

I was gonna put him in second to last place, but then I thought about a bit more.

I feel like he'd confess to u so his life could return to normal.

Like, him realizing his feelings for u literally destroyed his world, and he thinks the only way his dangerously nice thoughts about u will cease if he either confesses or tries to scares u and his feelings away.

I think he'd try the latter first, and literally become a big evil monster towards u.

He'd snap at u for basically nothing, yell at u, be 10 times as mean, and genuinely go out of his way to be a total ass towards u.

If his crude behavior distances u from him after being verbally abused way tok much, he'd be happy at first, thinking that without u in his life, his thoughts would return to normal and he could finally focus on pinball.

But after a few weeks, he actually finds himself missing ur presence. So instead of apologizing like a normal person, he decides to confess his feelings right out of the blue! very clever vance😐

So if spots u alone at school, he'll just pull u over and confess in the most confusing, unromantic way possible.

He won't expect a romantic relationship right and away (and u shouldn't either), but this could be the beginning to a healthy friendship and perhaps something more in the future.

Robin

Robin would be second to last, probably because he doesn't want u getting involved with his never-ending beef with the majority of the kids at school (the bullies).

He thinks that if he starts a relationship, his opps will go after u to hurt him (he's probably right).

So, although he steers away from a romantic relationship, he tries to become close friends with u to intimidate other potential suitors.

He'd use bf like behavior with u while also trying to be ur friend, and it was honestly very confusing.

I just think the mixed signals he'd be sending would be too annoying and confusing, to the point where you'd just have to confront him.

So he'll stumble over his words, and just give off awkward teen vibes before he actually gets to his point.

If u reciprocate, then you'd have to agree to not being too flashy with ur new relationship and take things slow.

You'd also need to know how to throw a punch or sm cause those ugly school vultures are unpredictable.

Finney

suprise suprise Finney's last!

Given his shy personality, low self-esteem, and his experience with bullies, it's obvious it would take him a while to confess.

He'd watch u from afar for a while, so you'd def have to start up a conversation.

Yalls' relationship would very much be a slow burn, filled with awkward moments, hidden meanings behind simple words, subtle affectionate gestures, and a lot of teasing from Gwen.

He'd accidentally blurt it out one day, taking u completely by suprise.

He'll instantly try to dismiss it, rapidly trying to change the subject.

But if u press him, then you'll get a proper confession, and the rest is up to u!

thank u for reading!!

[weepingtalecowboy]

People forgot that link definitely worked for his wanted poster

Fanfic prompt : After cadence of Hyrule joined the legend campaign as a hero of legends game

I like to think that legend is as close to being perceived as a threat or demon as a person could possibly be

Like link to the past had all the knights get brainwashed into believing that link was a threat who took the princess

And many people proceeded to headcanon that legend and the knights never really worked it out again and the knights still want to get his bounty

But I like to think that his bounty is justified by the end of link to the past

Because killing every single knight and doing a genocide is outright encouraged in link to the past (I was playing the game like a monstrous child because the knights were mad annoying lol )

Not killing at least ten knights is basically impossible

Would be more accurate to say that legend went and stabbed absolutely every single knight in self defense (or not … I was outright knight hunting the little dudes because it is fun to fight them , diabolical child I was )

But it is very likely that Baby legend massacred most of them as a lil baby in at least SOME cold blood

And instead of them being still brainwashed by the spell they instead just hate him for killing every other knight he saw

Like they probably have horror stories without end

Like what other explanation would the citizens and knights have for link other then being some sort of monster or demon with the appearance of a child

(Like with all the Knights link killed probably some had families or friends who were very much afraid of link and enraged at his deeds)

And the princess just forced them to leave him alone because he “saved” her as if all the murder never happened but she probably cannot do much over the fact that legend did cull half the population of knights and therefore killed the relatives of a lot of families

(We really need to accept that legend is canonically a killer even if it was mostly in self defense )

Then the kid just went into hiding because he was busy with the oracle games and link's awakening in other countries

And then hytopia happens as well but they probably don’t know that link is a serial killer who has a very expensive bounty

Link between worlds ends up at least a few years since link's murder spree and the royal family probably did their hardest to cover up the damage he created and the only logical explanation for why he can just return would be that he just kinda got lucky with bribery accepting neighbors lol

And that he wasn’t interacting to much with people

Honestly like to think that the knights were afraid of him even as they interacted with him in the game as a follow up

Ravio was unaware his counterpart was THIS trigger happy for quite a while

Would be hilarious if he heard rumors about the “incident” that link caused and didn’t take it seriously

They went different ways but know that link is back in Hyrule and also once again in the public eye the people probably quickly rallied up a witch hunt while the royal family really didn’t want to be involved with it anymore because they already did a big thing by pulling strings to get link to have some protection

Any more and they risk the people turning onto them

They get him in a bad spot and he just proceeded to jump into a lake and mermaid away

That probably convinced them that he really was some sort of monster

Rumors grew into a new sort of madness

Then cadence of Hyrule happens and everyone not dancing is asleep anyway in that game except some villages

Cadence probably had no clue about it as well because she was from a different world

But now link straight up can respawn and therefore execution would be a whole different kind of trauma for the knights and angry citizens

Like the royal family probably couldn’t keep it hidden any longer and had to go give the okay at some point (outlawing link is like the easiest way they can get this one under control)

Link gets executed then awkwardly has to escape and nobody was capable of stopping the rumors that link is some sort of demon anymore

Turning into a living sea monster seems unrealistic

But surviving getting executed several times probably tipped the scales over and he got officially into a mess since then

Then linked universe happens as well and legend gets a family out of it

Until they end up in his hyrule and realize why exactly legend is a bitter lime slice of a hylian

He kinda did stuff and is now an outlaw

But also heaviest breathing ever when the chain hears people talking about the time legend got burned at a literal stake yet still is alive

Playing never have I ever with him probably is nightmare fuel

What was he doing to be this much of a cryptic creature that people are genuinely afraid of him

Warriors probably slept with one eye open the day he realized that legend hunted the knights like some sort of eldritch demon when they were hunting him lol

[ronearoundblindly]

who would wear pink/red for you if you asked? could also be decorations in the car, at work, at home, on your pets' collars etc.

^ putting these on their cheeks hehe

Bless my own heart, I have never been this person, but I love ya. Here goes. No warnings just fun. (I know this'll probably be controversial, but I've done my best to be objective!)

Never

Honestly? Curtis. He's just...not into it. Even a 'salmon' shirt is pushing it because that's not his style. Oh, and he hates glitter.

Bucky also sorta hates all the stuff. It's just too much. (There is an exception to this, and it's dressing up a daughter. That is acceptable. If his little girl wants to put some pick stuff on him, fine, but he won't leave the house like that for Valentine's. For kid-specific events? Sure, but not for a nice date out with you.)

Jesus Christ, don't even try with Jimmy Dobyne or James Mace. Ummm, ok, maybe the pet thing would be fine but choose your battles wisely.

In Private

Ransom kinda thinks it's hilarious, but don't you ever take pics of him with that sparkly, heart-antenna headband or no one will find your body. Hard pass. Inside the house though, you can go nuts. Don't expect him to let anyone he knows see it before he makes you take all that crap down. Ran knows it makes you happy, and so he can live with stickers or fancy boxers, frilly blankets or ninety candles.

Andy and Ari will let you get away with decor and maybe one article of clothing (please, nothing in Ari's car, just don't). However, they are openly not thrilled with anything beyond a lovely pink or red dress/outfit on you and then the actual date.

In Public

If he's allowed to make fun of it the entire time, Jake will let you dress him up for the day. I mean, he'd prefer you see him a little more manly than the stickers and stuff, but he legit enjoyed the sparkling, temporary tattoos you bought on a whim.

Johnny has realized something fundamental: women actually dig a taken man. He will totally lean into the festiveness. He does not actually like most of it.

Steve--as with Bucky--does not enjoy the sheer amount of crap, but he looks better in a pale pink button-down and will let you decorate however you like.

Lloyd preens with how good you look, how good he looks, and how much he doesn't care what anyone else looks like or thinks. You can put the lacy pet collar ON HIM for all he cares. I mean, if there's anything he gets annoyed with, he'll 'punish' you for it later...

Thank you for asking!

[Main Masterlist; Who Would... Masterlist; Ko-Fi]

[a-doubleh-x]

Why I like Charlastor

The other day I noticed there was some negativity in the Charlastor tag, including antis and people feeling the need to defend against antis, so I thought I might as well take a step back and just write candidly about why I like the ship.

I only got into Hazbin in October of last year, but already it has inspired me a lot to write and fantazise about it. Like most people, I started with the classic "they look cute together", but as I kept looking I couldn't help but think there was something else to these two than first met the eye.

For starters, I love Pollyanas! I think they get a bad rep for being naive, but I just appreciate an optimist like Charlie who just wants to make people around her happy because it makes her happy. I also like bad boys 😳 I'm a pretty heteronormative guy, so I haven't had a big chance to explore that part of myself yet, but I do like the danger and excitement someone like Alastor brings to the table.

I will admit when I started writing Charlastor I felt like I was handling dynomite. It's a lil scary to ship a boundless altruist with a manipulative sociopath, but bear with me.

I think each of them has something the other needs. I think Charlie needs someone to challenge her, someone to steer her in the right direction while she's mostly isolated. At the start of the series, practically nobody but Vaggie takes her seriously, and Alastor is no exception. He mocks her, teases her, but she still listens and I think it's because somewhere deep down she understands there's something he's trting to communicate in his annoying, but curious way.

Of course, I also love the fanon Charlie who's down bad for Alastor, and even if that Charlie is a little naive, I think it's also sweet and she can use some indulgence while most people treat her like a child.

On the other hand, when it comes to Alastor, this is a bit of a theory on my part, but I think he's secretely lonely. He has friends, certainly, like Rosie and Mimzy, but they're not good enough friends to live together with him. They don't seem to be able to save him from "pure, absolute boredom". But Charlie, for some reason can, even though she's a stranger at the beginning when Alastor chooses to move into the Hotel.

Alastor is not as much of a cynic as someone who chooses to see things in a perspective that benefits him. He doesn't think redeeming sinner is "hopeless", but "hilarious" instead, which has interesting implications to me. That's why he chooses to hover around Charlie, not because he thinks she's lame, rather because he thinks she's silly. She makes him laugh. Which I think is kind of how Alastor sees "love".

And then you have fanon Alastor who, depending on the writer, is either a horny animal, a wisecrack edgelord or a soft boy who's mean to everyone but Charlie XD I like several of those interpretations, but I kinda prefer mine just out of personal taste. I think the best part about Alastor is that he doesn't *care* what anyone thinks of him and always does what he wants, even at the expense of other people, which I find pretty enviable.

They're kinda both outcasts in their own ways. Charlie by being unable to fit in and Alastor being unwilling to compromise. But they don't judge each other. He supports her in his own weird way and she houses him and is delighted of him in general, which is tasty food for his ego. I do wonder why Alastor is interested in Charlie, both in canon and in a fandom vacuum.

There's some cool potential for drama there, but also growth and healing, in my opinion. Personally, I think Alastor doesn't want to actually *hurt* Charlie, but he may hurt those around her, which will be a moment to start settling compromises if Charlie puts her foot down.

That haz bin my review so far! I'm honestly pretty grateful for Vivziepop for all of the work she's done so far, I know directing, animating and writing two shows over the course of 5 year or so ain't easy. I'm also grateful to the fandom who shares their thoughts and vision, which calms the terrible voices I started hearing in my head since I bought this weird old radio.

I'm in the middle of a break, but if you're interested in my fanfics I'll get back to writing very soon. Cheers! 🌈❤🦌

[erenfox]

RANKING SBG SHIPS BECAUSE LOKI GAVE US ALL FREE WILL 🗣🗣🗣🔥🔥🔥

Aidlyn/Ashden: good lord the chemistry. the 'he fell first but she fell harder' trope. the lil gestures by aiden. him annoying tf out of her but also becoming very caring when she's hurt. I'M SO CALM RN GUYS. and the fact that them ending up together is inevitable lmfao XD 9/10

Benlor: FUCKKK IM SERIOUSLY NOT OK THESE TWO ARE JUST SO PURE AND SWEET TO EACH OTHER. ESPECIALLY TAYLOR TOWARDS HIM, cuz he kinda suppresses his feelings and is a sad boi :( dw ben taylor's gonna make you feel happy again fosho lmao 😭 the lil blushing ben always does around taylor! her supporting his ideas even tho they flop! her helping him calm down from barron through music! her always cheering him up whenever he's gloomy! her being the first to thank him for opening up! THEY'RE LITERALLY THE DEFINITION OF SHE FELL FIRST BUT HE FELL HARDER! GOD IM SO NORMAL ABOUT THEM 😭😭😭 10/10

Tylenol/Tylo: i never thought of the prospect of them together, but post tumblr i must say its interesting. not just them being the single ones in the team, but i like the way tyler defended logan against barron, and his general protective aura around logan. but then again tyler was kinda rude to logan in the start. idk it just gives me the ick 4/10

Tyden: LMAO the continuous saga of them pissing tf out of each other. it would be fuckin hilarious if they somehow end up together. but apart from the general hilarious bickering, there's not too much to it 5/10

Tayden: goddamn their friendship is so precious!! her painting his nails? her carrying him on his shoulders in dat one artwork?PURE BESTIE VIBES they just match each other's freak lmfao. 8/10

Logden: meh there are not any significant moments between these two. 1/10

Loglor/Taygan: no but why can i actually see this happening lol. the way theyre both so gentle around each other! then the way she was the first to help him when he got slashed by the phantom? and also the way she stood up for him when tyler was being rude? AND the lil hugs they give each other which none of the duos in the gang give? Cute af! 7/10

Benlyn: ooh the two quiet people of the gang! they could work out really well bcoz they definitely understand each other's struggles with muteness and phantom hearing respectively. plus that panel of ben braiding ashlyn's hair was so cute lmao :> 7/10

Loglyn: AAA they have sm potential!!! before the events of yk the whole ✨sAvAnNaH✨ mess, i feel like they wouldve been each other's only existing acquaintance they may call friends (ik it's not canon but it's very plausible lol) 6/10

Benlo/Logben: theyd definitely be good together, it's just that my sbg memory is failing to recall any significant moments b/w them ;-; if y'all remember pls do tell 2/10

Tyben: what is with the hernandez siblings always ending up being bens biggest supporters lmao XD it's a cute dynamic honestly 4/10

Taylyn: now this is one freakin adorable ship TvT. the way taylor always had a slight pang of concern for a friendless lonely ashlyn when they were kids? and the way they quite frankly became besties after enduring all the phantom world shit? very sweet, both platonic and romantic lmao 6/10

Tylyn/Ashler: i have been usurped into the tylyn propaganda by @tragedry honestly I DO NOT COMPLAIN. like holy fuck they're so enemies to lovers! them "loathing" each other, fighting for leadership, but then immediately becoming possibly the biggest protectors of each other in times of danger??? extremely wholesome lmao i love them smmm 9/10

SO THE TOP SHIPS ARE:

4. tie b/w TAYGAN and BENLYN (the rarepairs that just make sense) 😌👌

3. TAYDEN (the crack ship) 😈🔥🥉

2. tie b/w TYLYN and AIDLYN (the wholesome ships) 😍❗🥈

1. BENLOR (THE PUREST SWEETEST MOST ADORABLE GOOFS EVERR I-) 🥺❤🥇

[summer-nights19]

Hey there! I'm really curious about what GoM would be like with a s/o who swears a lot. Like as foul language being a cultural feature

Hi !! As an Italian, I really relate to this lmaoo

This was soo fun to write

GoM x foul mouthed reader

No warnings, but kinda suggestive for Akashi

Aomine

- "You sure talk a lot of shit for someone with such pretty lips "

- Always talks dirty to you in this kind of ways

- he's the same to be honest, so you guys are perfectly matched

- Honestly, whenever you're talking/laughing together it's half cuss words

- You definitely influence each other for the worse, as you'd swear even more when you're together

- You have no kinda filter when you're around each other because you feel genuinely comfortable talking authentically

- I could see him being curious and asking questions about how it's a cultural difference and what other cultural differences there are between you guys

- You teach him cuss words in your first language so you can cuss secretly together in public settings. Sometimes uses them on his teammates and thinks their confused reaction is hilarious

-Secretly finds it adorable

Murasakibara

- He's the same, so as long as you don't shout when you cuss, he has absolutely no problem with it

- Won't really tease you about it or comment on it like lost if the others will - just kinda sees it as part of who you are

- Like with Aomine, you two have no filter around each other and cuss even more when together, especially if you're venting or talking shit about someone.

- You tried teaching him cuss words in your first language but he couldn't be fucked to learn them

Kise

- He's a bit surprised at first but he honestly finds it funny after a while

- While I don't think he'd swear that much, he still does on occasion and has no problem with it

- Will definitely tease you about it light heartedly. Makes the same kind of comments Aomine does to flirt jokingly

- Gets very good at guessing your mood based on how much you're cussing/what cuss words you're using

- Cusses slightly more when he's around you

- I could kinda see him making you use a swear jar (idk why 💀)

Kuroko

- Was a kinda surprised when he first heard how much you cussed, but he didn't really have a problem with it, despite not really cussing himself

- Just kinda accepts it as part of your personality, ad he also understands it's parly down to cultural difference

- Although he hid it at first, he sometimes finds it kind if funny, particularly when you catch people completely off guard.

- Like Kise, he'd learn to read your mood based off of how much you're cussing and the words you're saying.

Akashi

- Really wasn't fond of it at first - he likes manners and a certain standard of etiquette though he gets it's partially due to cultural differences

- Always told you to watch your mouth at first, but he gets increasingly used to it over time. Now, he (mostly) lets it slide

- You teased him for being uptight at first, but you quickly understood that you'd bitten off more than you could chew (you'll still occasionally do it)

- Loves to punish you for your bad language if you two are alone. Sometimes, you cuss deliberately around him due to this.

Midorima

- Also prefers refined speech and manners. At first, your cussing greatly bothered him

- Frequently lectured you/told you to watch your mouth initially, and got even more annoyed when you completely ignored him

-After you started dating, he grew to (kind of) tolerate it. After all, he loves you and that includes the parts that aren't perfect

- Understands it's due to cultural differences but it still feels so uncalled for to him

- You tried to cuss slightly less around him, with very limited success, but he still appreciated the effort deep down

- You often tease him for his uptight ways, and when he does slip ip and cuss, you don't let him hear the end if it

Masterlist

[colourstreakgryffin]

hey there honey! i'm here to request deerest alastor meeting a blitzo-like gn! reader fic if that's alright with you;) ( by that I mean either the reader with blitzo's story/persona/both if you wish. )

the genre? fluff, angst- anything, really. i kinda just wanna see how one would think they'd interact !

basically, i'm fine with anything, i do love a good surprise haha . it's rather more interesting;)

on a sidenote; i actually got this idea after watching some snippets of our boy and by recalling our conversation earlier. so i was hoping to see what's in store for our beloved if al were to ever cross paths with someone like him.

for an afterthought- man, i must say that i absolutely cherish this emo guy now.

( this could be platonic, or romantic; whatever you think fits for this shot/anything that is to your liking! )

hopefully this ask wasn't too confusing, and that you're fine with it. thank you, have a great day<3

Y E S! I love Blitzø from Helluva Boss so this duo will be so interesting! Alastor will have quite the difficulty to deal with a Blitzø! Leitora but yet, he will like them!

Alastor- Chaotic I.M.P

General

Alastor has such the passive-aggressive, crude, snarky, prickly Imp to handle. He doesn’t do that well but he also doesn’t shut said Imp out for the way they are… it’s just rough

Alastor’s patience is both worn out and stretched over further with you, the head of I.M.P and the royalty of being so immature and blood-thirsty. A assassin that’s trigger happy, and he isn’t sure how long he can stay calm with you

Alastor finds you interesting. Your mouth is vulgar but you’re actually very intelligent in your work and you rile up your little employee group very well. How fascinating, he considers studying you to figure out how native demons like yourself act

Alastor likes teasing you about your much shorter height and tugging you on your long tail. Both are methods to piss you off and maybe methods to make you pay attention to him as well

Most HCs of platonic can also apply to romantic then a few HCs of romantic can apply to platonic!

Platonic

Alastor doesn’t know how to react to the fact you’re constantly stalking him and following him around. You envy his relaxed, happy self and craves exactly what he has so you regularly watch him. All the times he’s caught you filming him… too many times

Alastor finds you hilarious. Your violent, dark sense of humour actually makes him chuckle and he encourages you to feel confident in what makes you laugh. It makes him laugh so it’s simply perfect

Alastor likes to tease you even more than he already does. Annoy you, piss you off, squeeze your face inbetween fingers to lead you on. It’s all so amusing and the way you bark out with rage at this has his day fixed instantly

Alastor does speak honestly about his own issues with you. He trusts you, you’re like the other friends he has, he may have known them specifically longer but he feels like he can be himself around you. You’re not that bad after all

Alastor finds it pretty cute that you have your own Hellhound child. You have a 22 year old Hellhound son/daughter/child and you’re so loving and affectionate to that Hellhound. He just watches it from the sideline, smiling widely and planning how to use this against you to mess with you

Alastor invites you out to hangouts regularly. To clubs, to drinking bars. Anywhere where it’s just you and him, and you two can just let loose by having drinking contests that end in Alastor slamming alcohol like a sailor and struggling to keep up with you on the dancefloor

Alastor will let you touch him with it seems fit but he does need breaks from you randomly touching him. He likes you, you’re a wonderful snarky little Imp so he can excuse any type of touch, but he needs space

Alastor’s smile and personality is more natural around his Imp friend and he treats all his friends equally so when you’re around, he’s smiling, giddy and sweet just like he is with other friends like Rosie, Mimzy

Alastor is the type of ‘I’ll do something for you at the right price’ friend. Give him what he wants and he’ll do a favour for you, he may like you as a friend but he wants to establish that you’re just like his other friends and you’re not that special at all

“Ah. My dear, this Hotel and my home is for everybody, including yourself. Feel free to get comfortable and we can chat more later”

Romantic

Alastor knows of your intimacy and commitment problems, and since he really likes this cute small gun-wielding badass imp more than he could suspect, he is willing to wait for you to get more comfortable with and trusting of him. Hence what actually fires up the relationship you two share

Alastor is extremely protective over you: you’re a mortal demon, he’s immortal. You can die, he already died and now immune to fatal blows. And the fact you’re an assassin that takes care of humans as well. You have the Radio Demon on your beck-and-call, and goddamn, how glad you are that you’re dating Al. You have a loving, doting but also scolding and cautious boyfriend right there to save your flank

Alastor expresses his loyalty, love and respect through that way he acts around you, giving you whatever you want free of charge, gifting you all kinds of presents, constantly writing you name on random pieces of paper or even the Hotel walls, being smitten of you around the Hotel staff. He can’t get you out of his head

Alastor loves carrying you around. You’re so small but you’re so squishy and cuddly, day or night. He loves hugging you to his chest and carrying you around, you’re smaller than Niffty and he’s living for it! You can be asleep and he’ll keep wondering around with you in his arms bridal style

Alastor is half for I.M.P, half not. The reason he isn’t is because he doesn’t want this psycho humans laying their hands on you and the reason he is is because he loves seeing you happy and he wants you to express your passions so he tries his best to be as supportive as he can

Alastor may or may not be the one taking care of you. You let loose sometimes after bad situations and he is the one reassuring you he’ll always be there, he won’t let you die alone and he’ll always be with you. He loves you and he wants you happy and healthy

Alastor’s ideas of a romantic date is to a nice restaurant, all dressed-up and bonding over simple conversation. Yeah, he isn’t the most ‘interesting’ date-planner but his vanilla tastes are so much better than anybody could ever suspect. You bond with Alastor very well with every date

Alastor enjoys bragging about you. He brags about you on his radio show and even promotes your business, I.M.P. He is going to show who you belong to and he’ll even mark you more… physically, if he must. You’re his and he won’t let any chance that somebody will try to steal you away

Alastor is an affectionate boyfriend and when I mean affectionate, I mean lovey-dovey, complimentary and touchy. He loves giving you kisses, holding you in his lap, giving you hugs, holding your hand all the time. He loves holding you, you’re so sweet and cute

“Darling. You should be a lot more careful… I wouldn’t do well without you, so please. Do both of us a favour and do not charge into battle recklessly… please? For this poor lovestruck little deer?”

Alastor also might just try figure out how to make you immortal so you’ll stay with him for all of Hell’s time

[taffycandyqt]

Hola my dear friend I've crawled from the depths of the infinite hole I live in to submit this request to one of the best young writers I know.

The 2003 turtle boys (you can add April and Casey if you want but don't feel pressured to!) with a female reader who's always sleepy, no matter the time or place she's always napping, on the floor, in the fridge whenever it's hot, etc... While also suddenly falling asleep during the most random moments (remember Ace from One Piece? Same thing, excepts in serious fights the adrenaline keeps her up) only that she doesn't take Purple Dragons and Foot soldiers seriously so yup she may fall face first in the middle of a battle, she also does the same when training, overall she barely trains or fights because of that, sometimes she just doesn't want to and just watch the turtles fight while eating popcorn. But one day let's say the Shredder attacks, and like always he beats the turtle easily, THAT'S when she finally decides to join in the fight, and she just??? Holds her own??? Like she doesn't beat him but puts up a really good fight, lowkey gets Shredder to struggle against her and may give him some scars, then when the fight us over and the turtle are like 'wtf??' She just shrugs and falls face first to the floor, asleep, and then never elaborate on that again.

Dwaaaaaa your so sweet😭 you literally got me giggling and kicking my feet🤭🤭🤭 also this request is fricking hilarious and I love it, thank you.🩷

Masterlist

Request Rules

Awww sleepy?

Normally you fall asleep at any point, even in battle. So how the heck are you not dead when Shredder is going at you?

2003 all x gn reader

Headcannons

Fluff, crack

You sleep a lot.

Honestly a lot is an understatement.

So much so that you make the turtles wonder if you actually choose to sleep as much as you do or if your just nocturnal.

You fall asleep so suddenly it scares them sometimes.

Heck, you'll be in the middle of a conversation and then just double over completely knocked out.

Because of this no one knew you fight.

I mean, how could they? Your always asleep.

So when shredder comes rearing his ugly head, it's safe to say that the turtles, April, and Casey were all very concerned with your safety.

You were too obviously, but, not as much as they were.

It got kinda annoying actually.

They kept tag teaming shredder whilst simultaneously dragging out out of the way

Like what the heck?

You can help!

You kept trying to tell them to stop it and to go at him all at once but they just wouldn't listen.

So, that left it up to you to occupy him until Splinter got here.

No biggie(⁠•⁠ ⁠▽⁠ ⁠•⁠;⁠)

Okay so it was a little biggie.

Turns out you can hold your own pretty well against Shredder but not for very long.

The amount of dodging, ducking, and attempts at hitting were getting to you.

Not to mention this man is buff as crap.

Any punch you caught our slash you grabbed put a shock through your entire arm!

IT WAS LIKE SHOOTING A FLIPPING GUN!

COULD SPLINTER GET HERE ANY SLOWER!?

Unbeknownst to you, your friends has started to come to.

Where they in any condition to help you?

Gosh no.

But they saw you. And the only thing running through their minds in that moment was...

When the heck did you get that good?

You. Who doesn't train.

You. Who once fell asleep so suddenly on the stairs April though you could have a blood problem.

You. Who would fall asleep during battles with the purple dragons

Is somehow you, who has been holding your own against Shredder, for the past while knows how long.

Eventually Splinter does get there, and just in the nick of time.

You body gave out almost immediately after he took the reigns.

Still, you'd kept Shredder in one place so 👏👏👏

Safe to say, that after that day the others had a bit more respect for you.

If course they still didn't trust you to be by yourself on a normal day in the event that you pass out in traffic.

But they trusted your abilities waaaaaay more after that day.

[catboymoments]

as someone who knows nothing abt The Discourse ™ around vivziepop this shit is kinda hilarious to me like yeah im sure shes hashtag problematique and has done Real! World! Harm! or whatever but honestly she just seems fucking obnoxious and annoying? like i dont rlly need her to be racist or w/e to dislike her, the fact that shes a millenial theatre kid who almost certainly had a hetalia phase is enough on its own yk?

THIS IS ALSO A TRUE

[cruyuu]

hii! that mini-rant of yours abt sukuita was beautiful. i'm just curious about ur thoughts regarding them and what made you like them so much?? (and it's good that you moved off twitter, it's a nasty place)

Hello anon!

I'll start by agreeing with you– that app really is annoying. I was thinking of moving off it because some ppl's interpretations of characters in jjk just started pissing me off but when I got those same ppl screaming in my qrts over and over how I can like this insane, disgusting ship (while they enjoyed twisted shit as well and get a clap on the back for it, I get judged for it like come on) I knew it was time.

As for what made me like them so much– even if they are problematic and kinda ???– well, strap in.

(I'm kinda angry there aren't more analyses of them but... oh well. Only #real fans of jjk know that Sukuna secretly is a fan of Yuuji and that he doesn't want to kill him because he loves really cares about his progress as a sorcerer apparently???)

Anyways, more under the cut.

First off, if someone told me I'll lowkey be obsessed with them, I wouldn't believe them. Honestly, I thought their situation was worrying, kinda weird yet hilarious right up until the Shibuya Incident arc where I saw the true extent of Sukuna's power and thought that hey, Yuuji kept ignoring this monster, this absolute disaster of a man and he was fine? He suffered absolutely no mental or physical repercussions before that? What? This apocalypse that's deep inside him nearly fucking giggled "Don't look up at me like that brat :3" when Yuuji died and went to his domain yet he nearly decapitated Jugo and the two teens merely because they held their heads a bit high.

Hell, Yuuji also threatens him yet he– tongue-in-cheek– brushes that off with "You look like you want to kill me". The anime really points out the weird amusement because you can hear him speak and Sukuna not only sounds amused, a bit done but he also sounds like he's teasing him (and is reveling in it)

He bargains with Yuuji calmly, offers him a vow to resurrect him only if he accepts to let him take control for a minute. You would think he'd ask for more, be greedy, be like "fuck this" and torture Yuuji until he accepts but instead he indulges him.

Yet...

Yuuji clearly got the special treatment. Sukuna could've easily showed off his power, tortured him, made him intently aware that he's not supposed to fuck around... yet it was "I fixed ur arm, where my hug at". Maybe I was overthinking it back then, when I first picked up jjk, but this struck such a deep cord within me that I couldn't function properly for days because I kept thinking of Sukuna– the epitome of evil– giggling like a school girl, allowing Yuuji to be "menacing" and disrespectful, and just dismiss all of that while if it was anyone else in Yuuji's shoes, they'd be mangled, ripped apart, tortured until death and laughed over (on repeat).

I love the 'two souls stuck in one body' idea. Like Yuuji has the epitome of the word evil inside of him while he's literally a sunshine. I could totally see Sukuna trying to break Yuuji from the inside out– torture him, threaten him, kill him over and over again, all just to pass the time, test out how it feels to be alive again– and I was kinda surprised canon never went with that option. Instead Yuuji just ignored him while Sukuna did... well... quite little. I still find it hilarious how it's canon that Sukuna yaps while Yuuji just ignores him. Yuuji's got guts, really.

Now this would be just that. They have an interesting dynamic, problematic as fuck but so very interesting and fascinating to explore both in the fluffy or the grim way but considering where we are currently– It isn't just that. It got both worse and better (regarding both my decent into madness– this ship– and them in canon).

I'll separate what more I want to talk about into sections because it's easier that way.

The Beginning & The End

The story quite literally opens with them. Yuuji being kicked into an unknown world (aka the inciting incident) is the result of him finding Sukuna's finger before Megumi can even find it. If Yuuji never stumbled upon that finger, the fight with the curse at that school wouldn't happen. He'd never get to meet Megumi, nor have to swallow Sukuna's finger. So without them, jjk wouldn't exist.

Chapter 1 is titled "Ryoumen Sukuna" and Yuuji and his Occult Club speculate that a lingering spirit is haunting the premises of the school. Their theory is swiftly debunked (Ticks lol), but they didn't know that their theory proved to be kinda correct.

And yes, the explanation being ticks is awfully fitting. Ticks are parasites– they latch on and slowly bury themselves inside of a human (or animal) and if you spot them too late, you aren't able to take them out and need to visit a hospital because these little annoyances are quite deadly. Sukuna's finger was around that school for an unknown time, since Yuuji found him, attracting curses which preyed on people without anyone even noticing. Plus parasites often need a host to survive– Yuuji being his vessel and having to swallow fingers to completely resurrect him.

What follows right after that is a bit meta and again, foreshadowing the future events:

1. Yuuji and his Occult Club being dismissed for spreading rumors — Yuuji couldn't see curses before he saw death for the first time.

2. Yuuji being a part of Track-And-Field team and not the Occult club — How Yuuji wasn't born as a sorcerer. He's just your average high schooler– someone quite boring.

3. The club president of the Track-And-Field interrupts them to say he rewrote it because he wants to make use of Yuuji's extraordinary abilities for the track team. Yuuji refuses, so the coach challenges him to a game that Yuuji wins with ease. – He's being warned off traveling that road that main characters go through, telling Yuuji to stick to a normal life. He's no sorcerer, after all. But here's the thing— Yuuji, despite not being born a sorcerer, is still special. He has incredible strength and lightning speed so even if he's not as cool as sorcerers, not someone special, he still kind of is. After all, Yuuji will go on to survive hosting The King of Curses, successfully prevent him from taking control and proceed to keep him on a leash.

And also:

He's not afraid as normal people in his shoes would be. Hell, he literally made the fabled King of Curses look like a joke. Do I need to remind you that Megumi couldn't do that despite being a sorcerer? Despite not being a sorcerer, despite not being cut out for this, he still likes it and wants to be a part of it.

Also, regarding it's growing on me– did you know that ticks' body grows as they feed on blood, but they only burrow their heads into the host and grow on them by laying eggs within?

He survived hosting Sukuna, promptly told him to fuck off from his body and got enlisted into Jujutsu High despite not being a sorcerer. Plus he got a gift– being able to use cursed energy due to Sukuna. Again, he is specialz. (And yes! Specialz by King Gnu is literally a sukuita anthem! The song is a twisted version of a ballad– a love letter from a beast that enjoys seeing the agony on his lovers' face rather than a smile. Who enjoys making him lose his mind and nudges him to accept the catastrophe. To embrace the ugly and lose the good. Like: You are my special; we are special; get lost in me; i love you baby?? It literally played over Yuuji's mental breakdown– and Sukuna told him to admire the mess he made– like what more proof do you need??!?!)

If Yuuji never swallowed Sukuna's finger, he never would've had cursed energy. He never would've became a jujutsu sorcerer. He never would've unleashed hell upon earth, watched his friends die and that promise he made to his grandfather would be left for helping regular people out in any way and not exterminating curses. He would've been way happier and way less traumatized but then this story wouldn't exist. 😔

But, I digress.

Yuuji's our main character and Sukuna's the final boss of the story. Despite the narrative promptly ignoring and continuously ridiculing Yuuji, stating he's nothing (a cog in the machine), it's all just so he would prove himself. Fight his way up. Embrace change. All writers know it. And besides, even if he's powerless and weak, well that matters little— considering Sukuna would go on to kill the strongest jujutsu sorcerer yet somehow still not deal with a weakling like him. The same weakling who keeps growing and maturing, being molded and shaped and therefore rightfully needs to be put down before he becomes a threat. I mean Uraume did comment to Sukuna in 257 that Yuuji is like an empty husk actively retaining some elements of him, a fact which should make killing him be Sukuna's top priority because it implies Yuuji— even if weak— could grow to become Sukuna's equal and therefore could kill him.

Still, Sukuna doesn't care lol. He doesn't consider him a threat, calls him boring, yet has a nearly two-page inner monologue just because he learned a fucking reversed curse technique. Lol

It goes like:

you're boring. you're literally insignificant that even killing you is a waste of time.

wait he learned reversed cursed technique within a month?

guess it's time to have some fun with him and then kill him

what the fuck is this irritating feeling

Sukuna pouts. He pouts and spaces out while wondering about connections and what people are to him. Like... ok? That's kinda ga Even Yuuji is stunned why he didn't continue fighting him but instead just started making faces like he's sad. Also, worthy of note is that he had the perfect opportunity to slam his fist through him because he was distracted. Sukuna's usually highly aware of his surroundings, very much in the moment when fighting an opponent, yet Yuuji does a new thing and now Sukuna is stopping the fight to contemplate about unnecessary things instead of you know, being normal and continuing the fight? It's so funny to me. (Also the way he's awfully handsty didn't escape my notice.)

Anyways, to go back and bring your attention to what I stated at the beginning: Everything started with them. Rightfully so, everything will end with them. There's something so beautiful about Yuuji being incomparable to Sukuna in terms of power, being mocked and ridiculed by the story, not special at all and not improving much even if he is improving. It would make his final battle with Sukuna so satisfying that I cannot really put it into words and I will be there no matter what!

Can you imagine that? The poetry of it all– the King of Curses defeated by a nobody. It's brilliant, really. Part of their charm, part of what makes them addicting.

Perfect Opposites

Another thing that makes sukuita delicious is the rather blatant contrast between them. They're total opposites in every sense of the word. The story continiously highlights it.

The story tries to belittle Yuuji, make him as insignificant to the overall plot as it can, make us– the audience– convinced and fearful that Yuuji will not bring about any change. It convinced most of the audience to root for characters equipped with the qualities an mc should have (like Gojo, like Yuta, Megumi, name it), to look away from the pawn that is Yuuji.

Most people, after all, don't like weak, not cool characters. Usually, what shonen does is that it will continually boost the MC's power until the protagonist could practically wipe the floor with the antagonist. As is the case in jjk, most ppl expected that Gojo vs Sukuna would leave Sukuna weakened, on the verge of dying, yet that wasn't the case. Instead Gojo got cut in half which had driven the entire fandom to start hating Gege as an author. To start crying about Sukuna being OP, that the story's gone to shit, all because the side character they rooted for didn't end the main antagonist of the series. How come someone as strong as Gojo dies yet someone who's weak– like Yuuji– lives?

You see, I love when shonen inverts tropes. I love that Gege hyped Gojo up, gave him a perfect backstory which already highlights and forshadows why he would lose, why he's not the strongest, etc. I also love the fact that Yuta went on and, instead of facing Sukuna by himself, chose to wear Gojo like a coat. I love how the MC is just standing on the sidelines instead of actively dealing with the threat.

That same MC who wishes to save his friend, who fights for others, who's as selfless as ever. Who's not a strong sorcerer but a strong person. Who keeps on witnessing how the strong ones are plucked like flies and possibly is wondering how the hell anyone's– let alone him– is going to defeat the threat in front of him.

The entire jujutsu society didn't sit down and speculate about Sukuna's weaknesses and strengths. Didn't even sit down to formulate a plan, to fight together, because it's all about proving your worth as the strongest, right? It's all about cool techniques, showing off, etc.

Most people saw it like this– well if Sukuna is strong then just have strong characters fight him. There you go. You have the strongest jujutsu sorcerer against the strongest used-to-be jujutsu sorcerer. If there's anyone on the same level as Sukuna, it has to be someone exactly like him. A monster. A mirror.

Most people don't see the point of Yuuji being the executioner because the narrative convinced them throwing a puny Yuuji against someone like Sukuna will realistically get him killed. For someone who should be dead by all accounts, Yuuji keeps persisting and keeps pissing Sukuna off– the same man who still doesn't kill him because of well... reasons. He's too insignifact to even crush, by Sukuna's standards. Yet he takes pride in torturing him– killing off and taking away people that Yuuji loves– has inner monologues about him, thinks back on him too much for no reason while fighting different people, almost as if he's fascinated, as if he cares, as if he never met someone like him.

If you'd ask the majority of the fandom who'd get to kill Sukuna: Gojo seemed like a plausable option, at first. Yuta too. Hell, Megumi even. After all, they're continiously put in focus, placed as special and branded as 'has potential'. Then Gojo dies, Megumi's taken over and Yuta is possibly on his way to death (Note: jjk is an ongoing story so... yeah. This is written before Chapter 262 for anyone who's reading this in the future.)

These people tend to forget one simple thing– that opposites attract. That you don't fight fire with fire, but with water. You don't come at the King of Curses with techniques using cursed energy– instead you come at him with raw strength alone. You don't battle to prove your place as a sorcerer– you battle to save a friend, to save people from a massacre.

If you battle to prove your ideal– then you best come at your opponent with something they don't know about. They know about being strong. They know about being a monster. They know about everything selfish because they embody it. Show them a different view.

Be selfless.

There's no one more tailored for the role than Itadori Yuuji. No one special. Weak. Insignificant. A total opposite to Sukuna. It is to be expected by most people that if he faces Sukuna in a battle, that he'd be killed off in an instant yet he survived a couple of battles with him nonetheless. He's broken down, haunted by all the people that died in front of him, but is still suicidal enough to face Sukuna all because he wants to save Megumi. He does it out of care. Out of love. He'd willingly trade his life for anyone.

Love isn't a curse. It is, in fact, the opposite. Love (unconditional one) is the most powerful weapon against curses.

And that is Yuuji's biggest strength. That is the key. He's there to prove that isolation makes you weak, that it is the bonds you share with others that make you strong, make you push on, make you live. Not your capabilities as a jujutsu sorcerer, but you as a person. Jjk does a great job at portraying that who you are matters more than what rank you are on those power-scaling polls.

This is why I adore them so much. I admittedly did go off a bit (literally crafted a theory) but it was all to prove a point why I love them. What makes Yuuji so perfect as Sukuna's doom— a perfect opposite— is the fact that he's a living, breathing epitome of something Sukuna never knew about. Friendship. Love. Care. Lowkey it does sound cheesy but it works. It really works too well lol

Yuuji will end Sukuna with the power of love.

Also: Funnily enough, both Sukuna and Yuuji do look extremely alike. Sukuna's OG form is literally Yuuji grown up. You could say, in a way, that Sukuna is just Yuuji who chose the dark path lmfao

They're not beating the twins allegations but neither are they beating the 'each other's half' because their contrasting way of living, of looking at the world, just places them as perfect enemies, perfect soulmates, two sides of the same coin, etc.

They're enemies and I've always been weak for enemies to lovers to I'd still kill you.

Family Matters

I ranted a bit about this here. Although yes, this adds even more shit onto the plate and literally slaps an incest tag onto them, it still gives further depth to their relationship.

Like I said in my rant– Yuuji is an offspring of Sukuna's twin brother who he devoured. From the story perspective, that puts Yuuji on a big pedestal. He could be the perfect revenge for his father who got eaten before he could even live. Let's not forget that Yuuji got sentenced to death by the story when he swallowed Sukuna's finger and survived, which kinda mirrors that (He's just fifteen yet the threat of death was looming over his head daily).

But despite the odds, he still lived– just like Sukuna's twin brother had managed to get reincarnated (to experience life)– even if that brought on a massacre and led to the mess we are in now.

So, Yuuji ending him is the perfect revenge. Pure poetry. Thank you for coming to my ted talk!

Now, I know most people get the ick about this ship now. After all, it is ugly if you view their relationship through a romantic light. It's horrible, but at the end of the day, it is fictional. They're two lines on paper, not something that exists. No, that doesn't brand anyone liking them a literal real life incest enjoyer or dangerous individual nor is there any deeply rooted psychological problem with the people liking them. And I know— So why do you like this? Because I am an adult and can seperate what isn't real and what is. If you can't, then stay away from fiction because applying morals to something that doesn't exist is worrying.

Also in fiction, there are no rules because putting rules in fiction is destroying what makes fiction good in the first place! Hope this helps.

Sukuna and Yuuji being uncle and nephew makes for some good memes, some problematic– familial or romantic– fics and still works for the narrative. I'm not complaining and I genuienly can't hate them. It can't make me unship them. Their dynamic is too interesting for me, I'm afraid. I love them, whether in a romantic, purely familial, platonic, enemies, whatever way.

So yeah, anon. There you go.

Sukuita is very interesting for writers who want to push boundaries when it comes to writing dark, disturbing stuff but it is also a playground for those who want to nick them out of canon and have fun with them. I am one of those people because I really do find both of them interesting– in canon or an au, related or not, similar or opposites, whatever.

Have a great day/night!