#it’s been much easier to learn than the last time I tried at like 10 years old

[talesfromthebandgeekmafia]

Having your wisdom teeth out sucks but it is good for sitting around the house having an excuse to just do whatever random shit you want so today is the day I’m finally gonna learn to crochet amigurumi. We’re doing it

[hellsquills]

Disclaimer: I know about the duffle bag Filbrick threw at him, but you can ignore that if you want

My thoughts below the cut! (this turned into a whole ass fic lmao)

My personal headcanon is that Filbrick is as much of a coward as he is of an asshole. Therefore, he wouldn't have kicked Stan when he did in canon. Probably not for a while after that.

However, he does try to send him to military school. He keeps talking about how this kid needs to learn discipline and respect, and if he's not gonna bring money to the house, then he should at least bring some honor to his family.

Stan obviously does NOT want to go. Not only because it's a pointless war ("what've the vietnamese done to us anyways?") but because he remembers his mother's face when Shermie got drafted and he will NOT make her go through that hell again. Also, he doesn't wanna die!!!! Hello?????

He talks it out over the phone with Ford, who's obviously just as against it as he is. He tells Stan that, if he gets into a PhD program, he could skip military. Stan laughs in his face. It'd be easier to jump off the plane without a parachute.

And so, he comes up with a plan. When he goes to take his physical, he tries his best to botch it. If he is bad enough, if it looks like he can't do it, maybe he won't have to. Unfortunately, the recruiters are far too used to this by now, and they don't buy it. Stan goes home with a recruitment letter hidden in his jacket.

Everything goes downhill after that. He runs away from home, changes his name several times, does some crime here and there... The military is after him, and it doesn't take rejection kindly.

Stan stays out of contact with his family for a few years. He can't risk getting them involved in this mess. They don't deserve it. So he just leaves, without saying a word, in the middle of the night. No phone calls, no notes, nothing. Not even he knows where he's going. But if it just looks like he abandoned them, maybe they'll hate him. That will make them sound more believable with the police. They aren't covering for him, because they genuinely have no idea where he is. It's the best way to keep them safe.

In that time, Ford doesn't stop looking for him. He finds him every once in a while, but only his phone number, and he knows that could give away his brother's location and get the family in trouble. So, against his deepest instincts, he doesn't call.

One, three, five, seven years pass. Stan has been around almost all the country, and is genuinely considering leaving it. Maybe going to Mexico, or Colombia. Those sound nice. Maybe they'll be nicer to him.

He's passing his time and thinking about this in a small town restaurant in wherever he's in (somewhere he's not banned from, yet), when a family enters. He doesn't make eye contact, but he can't help but stare at them: a man and a woman, probably in their 50s, with 7 kids; one must be older than him, the second one around his age, the third one a little younger, the fourth one a teenager, and the last three between 10 and 15, no more. Except for the last three, they're all taller than him, even the mother, and they have various degrees of blond hair. Their clothes (overalls and plastic boots) suggest they must work in one of the farms he's seen around the state. They don't wear any accessories, except for the glasses that the father and four of the kids have. They're talking loudly and laughing. They look exhausted from a morning of hard work. They seem happy. They... look nothing like his family, and yet, he can't help but think about it.

He can't help the sob that comes to his throat. It's loud and messy from trying to suppress it, which obviously makes it worse. He covers his mouth immediately, and at that point he notices the tears that have run down his cheeks. "Great", he thinks, "that will make it easier to hide, for sure".

He doesn't move. He wants to escape, but that will draw even more attention to him, and he hasn't even paid for the food yet (normally he'd leave without paying, but the old waitress was kind enough to give him some extra food when she saw how little he ordered). He settles for not moving, lowering his head and covering his face, hoping that no one heard (unlikely) or cared (very likely).

"Ya'lright, son?"

The voice startles him. I wasn't very deep, but it was close enough to send his body into immediate danger mode. He looks up at the man towering over him, who's standing in front of him at a prudential distance.

"Y-Yeah, yeah, no worries."

He hates how broken his voice sounds. He's spent more than enough time sweet-talking his way out of trouble, he should be better at this by now. The man looks about as convinced by it as he is himself.

" 'lright then. Can I help ya?"

Damn villagers and their welcoming demeanor. If he wasn't a wanted man, he would appreciate it. But right now, it couldn't be worse timing.

"Come get ya food, kids!" The waitress' yell yanks him out of his thoughts.

"No", he blurts out, and he turns to the man. Least he can do is show him some respect and look him in the eyes. "I'm fine, thank you."

The man smiles lightly and nods. "Okay. Welcome to the town."

Stan watches as the man goes back to his table. He wishes he had been more polite, the guy was just worrying about him, but he can't afford it. They already know his face, he can't risk anyone else recognizing him-

"Sweet Mother of God almighty."

Stan turns to his right. One of the kids, the one about his age, is looking at him like he just grew a second head. He's frozen in place, his eyes wide as plates behind thick glasses. He doesn't say a word, and it's getting increasingly unnerving. Was the bruising on his face still visible? Maybe it's more apparent in broad daylight than in the shitty light that last motel had in the bathroom.

"I'm sorry, I- Can I ask your name?"

The fuck?

"No", answers Stan. Considering how nice his dad was, this guy is pretty rude.

"Son, leave him alone." The mother seems to have manners too, good to know.

The guy does pretty much the opposite. He comes closer to him, until he's right in his path, blocking his exit. That can't be good. Stan feels trapped.

"Are you Stanley Pines?"

Well, that's about it.

Stan tries his best to stay still. This guy doesn't look like a cop, not even an undercover one. But he knows his real name, so maybe someone in his family or friends works in the police; or worse, in the military.

"Listen man, I don't know who you're talking about, but that isn't my name. See?" He reaches for his wallet. He pulls out an ID, with a very clear Jackson Cage on it. He makes a mental note to change it soon, just in case his hunch is right and this guy has connections. "Now, if you excuse me, I'd like to pay for my food and leave. Move."

Stan is already on his feet, but the guy hasn't moved. Stan looks him up and down, trying to appear threatening despite his face probably still being a little red from before. He also gauges how feasible it'd be to escape if things turned bad; the dude is taller than him, sure, but he's also as thin as a toothpick, and by the anxious look on his face, he doesn't seem eager for a fight. The real problem would be evading the restaurant's staff and the other costumers, which include eight carbon copies of the guy in front of him. Probably better to try to de-escalate the situation.

"I- I can't let you leave. Please. I know who you are."

This man is making it really difficult to believe he's not a cop.

"No, you don't. I'm new in town. Move."

"Listen, I-"

"Move out of my way."

"I know your brother."

The words are like a bullet between his eyebrows.

"You look just like him-"

Against his better judgement, he quickly grabs he guy and pins him to the wood in between the booth benches, arm to his throat. If he knows Ford, he knows too much. God he just wanted to have lunch.

The commotion is immediate. He doesn't break eye contact with the guy who's grabbing his arm, whose strength is frankly surprising. He can hear, however, the screams from the dad and the siblings, as well as a couple of gasps from the other costumers. This is not going to go well, but fuck that. He's escaped worse.

"Stop!", the guy shouts as he keeps Stan's forearm from blocking his airway. "Don't hurt him! Don't get closer!"

It takes Stan a second to process what he said. The first part, sure, who wouldn't shout 'stop' when you're being attacked? But the second half doesn't make sense. Is he protecting him? The attacker?

Whatever it is, it works. The family stops in their tracks, still very ready to attack if needed. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see the three younger kids moving closer to their mother. For a split second, he feels a pang of remorse for the scene he just caused.

"Hang up the phone, Clarisse, it's okay. Please."

Stan looks in the direction the guy was talking to. Right behind him, the waitress reluctantly puts the phone down.

He looks back at the guy. He looks a little shaken up, probably from the impact his back (and his head?) made with the wooden plank, but he doesn't look scared. He almost looks... sympathetic? Stan is confused as hell.

"I know who you are", the guy whispers, low enough for Stan to hear alone. "You're Stanley Pines, and you have a brother named Stanford. I know him, okay? He's my friend. I met him a few years ago in a quantum physics congress and we've been talking ever since. He told me about his family in New Jersey, and about you. About how he hasn't seen you in years, and how he was trying to find you, to no avail."

Stan is gradually loosening his grip on the guy's neck, who takes a deep breath. He should know better, but- shit, hearing that Ford was looking for him was not what he expected. Even if he doesn't know yet if this guy is lying out of his ass, it's enough to make him doubt.

"I know you were called to Vietnam. He told me. I spent a week with him in his place when he found out, he was unconsollable. When you ran away, he called me. He knew what it meant for you and he thought he'd never see you again, whether you got caught or not. All because of that stupid war." Stan is now trembling a little, he knows it. This guy must know it too, with how close they are. If he stays here any longer he'll break down, but he can't move. Anything to hear his brother's name a little longer. "I know what it's like. Three of my cousins were drafted last year, and I know at least one of them won't be coming back home. Please... let me help you."

Stan meets his eyes. They're green and brown-ish, not unlike the immense fields he's seen in his last journey, the one that led him to this town. With the years, he's learned not to trust beautiful eyes, because they are better at hiding. These ones, however, seem serene and honest, just like his words, and he can't help but believing them. This guy, whoever the fuck he is, knows just about enough.

Stan lowers his right arm. The guy still has his hand on it, but this time is much less defensive and much more comforting. He doesn't complain.

"My name's Fiddleford McGucket, and I'm gonna help you find your brother."

______________________________

Essentially, after this Fidds calls Ford as if nothing happened (per Stan's request, since he's still paranoid about the police tracking his calls) and asks him to come to Tennessee. Ford argues that he's very busy and all, but Fidds convinces him in the end.

Obviously the twins have a dual breakdown and cry their heart out. In this AU they're much less emotionally constipated lol

Ford tells Stan that he's gonna build a house in a small town in Oregon as a part of his research, and asks him to move in with him once it's finished. Stan, of course, accepts.

In the meantime, Stan stays in the McGucket farm and helps them out as a way of laying low. He has a great relationship with his family, and they're very proud of him for what he did (i believe that the McGuckets are hippies at heart, and they're VERY anti-war, especially when it already took three of them)

I don't know how much of the canon storyline would this AU follow, but it's pretty much your average Mystery Trio AU with some different backstory

[anki-of-beleriand]

Bad Liar ch. 18

Summary: Life is about lessons, and Wanda has been learning some harsh facts that had define her life and taken her to a place in which she was given a second chance. Then, all of a sudden, she meets you, and she realizes why it's easier to lie to yourself than to accpet what's right in front of her.

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff/ Female!reader - America/Kate - Mentions of past Vision/Wanda - past Natasha/Reader - Some Female!Reader/Carol Danvers - Mentions of Natasha/Maria being married

Warnings: Slow burn - Enemies to friends to lovers - Mentions of abusive relationships - Toxic relationships - angst - drama - mentions of abuse - violence - mentios of abused and sexual assault - idiots in love - violence - suggestive themes - drama - angst - fluff

Author's note: The world had changed, and Wanda finally had a chance to show you and tell you how much she loves you and how much you had changed her life for the better.

Well, guys, this is the end.

I surely hope you guys like this chapter as much as I love writing it, and that in general you love the story. I wanted to give you a closure to what had happened and to how the story of both, Reader and Wanda would unfold, but I also wanted to give you a glimpse of the future so. Hope you enjoy the read! Thank you to all of you who stay to the very end, it was quite amazing to have you with me all this time.

Please rmemeber English is not my mother tongue so forgive my grammar, spelling and funny mistakes, hope you like this one.

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 - Chapter 11 - Chapter 12 - Chapter 13 - Chapter 14 - Chapter 15 - Chapter 16 - Chapter 17 - Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Wishing upon a shooting star

Now and Forever

Time was a funny concept.

After the incident with Vision and Agatha, the world continued its slow travelled into a new year and the normality of life. But for you and your family, it became a painfully slow process in which you had to face many decisions and harsh realities. In the last couple of days, you had tried to make everything work, you made sure not only America but Wanda and the twins had the support they needed to continue on, while also dealing with the legal affairs involving Vision.

Everything had been a part of your life and how you were building up from scratch what had been put in jeopardy in a matter of hours.

Still, you and Wanda endure, and you couldn’t help but fell more in love with the woman that had been picking up her pieces while being everything you and her children needed. You massaged your neck tiredly, the house was completely alone and Wanda and the twins were still out somewhere with Natasha and Maria.

At least that was what she had said to you when you asked for her companionship to your appointment with the doctor. It had been a strange day, a very lonely day in which you had been left alone with your thoughts and emotions.

You whistled glancing around your living room before directing your attention to the stairs, America had long gone somewhere with Kate and you regretted not having agreed to her and her idea of joining you at the hospital. With a heavy sigh, and some tiredness you made your way upstairs ready to take a shower.

Of course, noting could had prepared you for what you found there.

The room was completely empty.

You stepped forward until your eyes fell upon the clothes that had been neatly organized on your bed. Right on top of your favourite trousers there was a single note with your name on it, you recognized America’s messy handwriting and you couldn’t help but smile at the words she had left written on the piece of paper.

Today is finally the day!

Wanda has been planning this for a very long time, and since I am very amazing sister, and sister-in-law, I decided to give her a hand.

I choose your favourite clothes and left everything ready for you to get dress and ready for your date with Wanda. You and her both deserve this time, and I think it would be the perfect time to just be yourself and talk about everything but what had happened lately. Please, be happy. I will take the twins to Kate’s place and you two will have the rest of the afternoon and the night for yourselves. Please, just write to me and make sure you enjoy the date.

Love, the best sister in the world (me)

Your smile only grew knowing in the last couple of days America had been completely secretive though always offering hints of how much you were going to love the surprised. Wanda had been holding her secrets just as tightly, and by the time Friday finally arrived you were really dying to know what Wanda had prepared.

“Very well, one hour before Wanda is here,” you mumbled to yourself letting your eyes wandered around to check your clothes. With a wince, you left your backpack and the jacket on a chair and went to the bathroom.

You couldn’t help but gasped at the sheer pain you felt running through your arm, leaving the sling to the side and helping yourself out of your clothes. Your reflection blinked back at you, the wound on your left arm was still red, and fresh, pulsating from time to time reminding you not only of the cold winter days, but of what had almost happened two weeks ago.

With a frown, and a shake of your head you turned around getting the bath ready.

Today was about you and Wanda and whatever it was she had prepared for you, there was no time to think anything sad or regretful. With a smile on your face, you put on some music and decided to get ready for the woman that had already captured your heart.

A deep void of anticipation settled on your lower abdomen and you could hardly wait to see Wanda again.

You glanced at your reflection with a critical eye.

America had put together the suit your dad had chosen for your first official meeting in the company. Your lips curled lightly, it had been a while since you last used those Chino pants, or that blazer, but it was your favourite one because of how it made you look. How it made you feel. You smiled fixing your left arm to rest comfortably on your midsection, the blazer and pants tailored fit complementing your body form with the dark colours you favoured so much. 

You found your eyes in your reflection, your body tingling with anticipation and a void expanding on your abdomen. Your heart shrank with emotion, when you recalled Wanda's eyes on you, her smile and the sweet timbre of her voice. If you were to be honest you didn't know when you felt for her, when you lowered your guard and allowed this woman and her children to take home in your heart. You just knew that one day, her smile took your breath away and her eyes on you made your heart fluttered with want.

The mobile on your bed vibrated several times, you furrowed your brows grabbing the phone while reading the message. You smirked, you turned around and went directly to the first floor making sure you had your wallet and keys on you. The moment you opened the door your throat went dry, 

She stood by your door wearing a single, dark blue dress pressed around her horse but loose around the waist. There was a black coat on her, with her hair straightened up and light make-up glistening on her face. She smiled shyly at you, her eyes taking in your frame before they settled in your eyes, her cheeks wore a dust of red you were familiar with.

“Hey.” She greeted tentatively dipping her head while looking away for a moment.

You shook your head, blinking a couple of times before stepping forward.

“Hey.”

Wanda leaned back, her tongue playing with her lips with her hands closing tightly around the purse she had borrowed. 

“You look beautiful.” You finally stuttered out, your face warming up when those green eyes fell on you once more. 

Wanda put a strand of hair behind her ear, her smile softening leaning into the touch of your hand on her arm.

“You look good, too.” She replied and you were quite relieved you were not the only one incapable of speaking properly at the moment.

“Only good?” You asked teasingly, Wanda opened her eyes, shaking her head.

“You look amazing.” She finally stated, rolling her eyes when you just chuckled.

“Amazing, eh?”

“You always look good,” Wanda lifted her hand and put it on top of yours, “are you ready?”

You stepped out of your house closing the door behind you, you grabbed her hand placing a kiss on her knuckles with a single winked that made Wanda falter for a moment.

“I'm all ready for you, Princess. I'm also very excited to know where you are taking me, and what you have planned for today.”

You couldn't hide the excitement in your voice, you bounced on your feet while Wanda merely shook her head pointing to the car. 

“It's still a surprise and as such, you are going to be asked to wear a blindfold.” 

You cocked a brow at her, your lips curling playfully.

“Kinky.” You chuckled when Wanda slapped you playfully on the back, she rolled her eyes but you could tell she was blushing profusely.

“Come on, we have reservations.”

Wanda started walking down the lane but stopped when your hand closed around her forearm. She turned confused, her eyes finding yours and the seriousness of your expression made her turn completely to face you. 

“We cannot go like this, you know?” You shook your head, but Wanda merely creased her brows tilting her head.

Whatever question she had, or whatever she was going to say was soon cut by your lips finding hers in a slow, tentative kiss. Her breath caught in her throat, and you just loved the way she tilted her head placing her hands on your forearms giving into the kiss while opening her mouth with her tongue teasingly playing with yours. You smiled into the kiss, sowing down until your forehead was resting against hers. Both breathing hard, flustered with lips swollen from the kissing.

“Are you…are you happy now?” Wanda asked and her voice, while still recovering, suddenly was huskier than ever.

You nodded, placing a sweet peck on her cheek, stepping back before you couldn't contain yourself.

“Yep, now we can go.”

____________________________

The ride to your destination was a silent event.

The silence was filled with music and conversation about your doctor’s recommendations for the physical therapy and Wanda’s care of her throat. You had leaned back against the eat, with a smile playing on your lips while you gave the woman sitting beside you a trust you rarely placed in anybody else.

When the car finally stopped, your stomach was squirming deliciously and your heart was jumping with anticipation of what was going to happen. You waited until a warm hand placed itself on your leg, your body tense leaning in to follow the voice of Wanda.

“I thought very hard on this, you know?” Wanda was speaking softly, with her voice filled with memory and something you couldn’t quite name, “I’ve been going through so many changes, and when I was finally getting to know myself I met you.”

You cracked a smile leaning your head without being able to see but sensing Wanda’s eyes on you.

“That was one hell of a first good impression?”

Wanda snorted, her hand clenched tenderly around your knee.

“No, I hated you.” This time around you could tell she was not joking, but her voice merely softened. “I hated what you made me feel, I felt vulnerable but at the same time there was this horde of butterflies on my stomach and my chest was always tight and throbbing…it was infuriating. It was confusing.”

You lifted your right hand; your movements were slow and tentative waiting to see if Wanda would stop your advances but she never did so. By the time you took off the blindfold, you could see the face of the other woman looking right outside the parking lot of a big, black building. Wanda let out a breathy sigh, it came right from her chest and by the time her green eyes found yours your heart skipped a beat.

“I wasn’t sure as to what I was experimenting until…” Wanda shrugged, “until I told Hope, then everything make sense.”

“Was it the first time you…” your question caught in your throat, there were many things you wanted to ask, furrowing your brows you realised there were certain details about Wanda you had yet to see, you had yet to know.

Fixing your position on the seat, this time around it was you the one facing her while the building stood like a shadow in front of you.

“Was it the first time a woman flirt with you?” You asked tentatively, Wanda nodded tilting her head until she was locking her eyes with you.

“It was the first time I actually admit to liking a woman, Y/N.” Wanda then softened her features, her hand seeking yours, “today I want to make it special, I want for you to know and to feel just how much you mean to me. I…I may be slow with words, but I don’t want you to think I am not experiencing the same emotions as you do.”

Your lips broke into a half smile, you leaned forward until your lips were on her ear. Wanda shivered her eyes fluttering close as you spoke.

“I love you.” It was a simple whisper, three words you had gotten used to tell the other woman with every single ounce of honestly you could show her.

“I know.” Wanda replied back turning her face until your lips and hers were brushing against one another, you snorted shaking your head.

“Very well, Han Solo, where are we?”

Wanda furrowed her brows scrunching up her nose the very same way the twins usually did when confused. You chuckled tucking her locks behind her ear.

“What did you call me?” She asked tentatively leaning back, you raised a single brow.

“You know? Han Solo? Star Wars? Princess Leia?”

Wanda shrugged shaking her head, her eyes twinkling in silent laughter at the face of pure mock disbelief you were wearing at the moment. It was as if you were genuinely offended by her lack of knowledge for what you were saying.

“God, as soon as this is over you and I are going home to see the movies, the original ones before I settled on letting you see the full saga.” You commented opening the door of the car.

Wanda followed your actions, but just before the both of you left the warmness of the car she decided to speak.

“Funny, I thought that after we left this place you and I could be doing something totally different once we were home. I was dying to know what else you could do with that mouth of yours.”

The young woman smirked closing the car door behind her and walking down the parking lot, her cheeks were a witness of her embarrassment but her heart fluttered happily when she heard your cursed and gasp. The door closing with a loud thud, while your footsteps hurried up behind her.

The night promise to be fun.

The main entranced had been decorated with silvery banners announcing the newest show, the doors were closed and a single sign to the left showed the place had been closed hours ago. You furrowed your brows; it was until the both of you had been standing closed to it that you realized you were in the Natural Museum and the Stark Planetarium. The place was huge and it had been built just outside the city to make it possible for the observatory to get easiest access to a clear sky.  Your eyes lighted up leaning in to observed inside the glassed doors, Wanda stood by your side writing something on her phone while waiting patiently with you.

“How did you know?” You asked leaning back, Wanda shifted her weight from one feet to the other facing you with a soft smile.

“I did pay attention when you helped the twins with their homework, and I did my investigation to make sure I wouldn’t get this wrong.” Wanda stepped closer to you positioning herself on your right side so she could grab your hand in hers. “I want this date to be special.”

“Being with you is what makes this date special.” You pecked her cheek, and Wanda just shook her head.

“You’re such a sweet talker.”

“Nah, I’m just saying the truth.”

Soon the doors were opened and a single guard opened the doors, he smiled at the both of you while passing a set of keys to Wanda giving her silent instructions as to where they should go and which parts were off limits for the both of you. You observed as the young woman listened carefully, she took the map the man was giving her while also pointing to something on the tablet he was holding. Your heart skipped a beat thinking of all the things she had done, if only to get you to where you two were at the moment ready to enjoy the strangest date you had ever been to.

“Very well, we’re not allow to disturb the rest of the exhibitions so let’s see, I think it’s down here.”

“Lead the way, my lady, I am but a humble peasant at your mercy.”

Wanda chuckled grabbing your hand dragging you through the corridors, it was only the both of you and the sound of your footsteps disturbed the silent scene spreading before your eyes. You had been in that place several times through your youth and adulthood; it was one of your favourite places in the whole world and you had a sneaking suspicion this part of the date had been America’s contribution.

“No way…” you whispered this time around walking faster until it was you the one dragging Wanda behind you, your smile grew just as you turned around and found the planetarium had been fixed in such a way that right in the middle of the ground there was a single table with two chairs.

You had been there when your father was helping around on the renovations, at that time you were but eight years old, but the idea behind these new arrangements was to make camping-like scenario for some of the youngest people that would fill the place in the future. The idea was to make of this dome of the most accurate and real in the whole country. 

Let’s make it feel as if they were actually outside, watching the stars above their heads on a nice, summer night.

Your face broke into a nostalgic smile as the words of your father filled your mind.

Wanda took a deep breath her hand squeezing yours tenderly, her heart beating fast just as you let go while strolling around the place. The planetarium was located on the west wing of the building, it was the biggest in the east coast and it usually held some of the most important films about astronomy and history in the whole country. The projection dome was done with neutral colours with a LED system that came along with the latest technology for audio and special effects. It had been a couple of years since you last were inside the Domo and finding yourself in the midst of such a place only brough a bubble of happiness that spread all through your senses.

Everything was already set up, and the lights that were lighting up the place were just centred on the single table with two chairs right in the middle of the room. Instead of the normal chairs that were placed around the theatre, you found yourself looking at a scene that never thought possible and you knew right there and there of all the effort that Wanda had taken that very first time to give you the perfect date.

“Do you…do you like it?��� Wanda finally broke the silence approaching you with a tentative stare in her eyes, she approached the table signalling the cutlery with the table, the glasses of wine and the single bottle resting on a small side table inside a bucket filled with ice.

You turned to the woman standing beside you, it was quite incredible that even after all she had done there was still some trepidation in her features, the nervous picking of her fingers while she tried to offer explanations of how everything came to be. Of the careful planning she did to make sure everything would be ready, that everything would be there on time.

You stopped her tirade just as she was about to tell you she chose as the main course had been lasagne accompanied by a white wine.

Wanda got her words tangled in her throat, her lips trembling lightly until she lifted her arms to return your hug. For the very first time, after what happened in New Year and the process of recovery you and Wanda allowed the comfort of a single hug.

“This is amazing.” You whispered making sure she could feel everything you were experimenting at the moment.

Wanda closed her eyes, taking in the sweet aroma of your perfume and surrendering to the warm of your body. You leaned back, brushing your fingers on her hair while taking in the marks on her eyes and the tentativeness behind her stare.

“Nobody had done this before, you know?”

“Really?” Wanda asked right away, you shook your head. Wanda pursed her lips stepping back a little.

“You don’t have to say that, you know?”

You furrowed your brows seeking her eyes with yours until she couldn’t look away from you.

“I mean it, Wands. I’ve been in many dates some of them were unique in the way the presented themselves, but…well, this…” You lifted your eyes to the dome stretching your arms while twirling around, “having someone worry enough to make something I like? Not many did, and not in the way I was expecting.”

“Well, I just thought…” Wanda turned around when the gates of the theatre opened and there came a couple of waitresses bringing over the food.

You grabbed Wanda’s hand leaning in to place a single kiss on her knuckles, the young woman rolled her eyes at your gesture but took it for what it was.

“Let’s eat, and discuss this, my lady.”

“Let me help you out.” Wanda replied walking fast to the closest chair pulling it out waiting for you to sit.

You grinned taking the chair while Wanda too the one right in front of you, the two young men worked was placing the plates filled with food while also serving the wine and leaving two glasses of water as well.

Everything was perfect, the smell of the fresh lasagne filled your nostrils and it was quite evident you couldn’t shake the smile adorning your features. Wanda puffed out her chest, a sense of pride overcame her knowing she had made it possible for you to not lose your smile or relaxed posture.

“This is delicious,” you moaned while tasting the food, Wanda blushed glancing at the food while nodding in agreement. “God you bought it in Olympia, didn’t you?”

“Yep, Ajak was very kind to offer the services of the waitress and the food and actually all the things you see here.”

“You really outdo yourself with the date, Wanda.”

Wanda lifted her face taking in your frame, she smiled going back to her food.

“I really wanted to make this special for you.” Wanda grabbed her wine frowning her brows for a moment, “I never thought I could be this special with anyone, let out feel like this for someone else.”

You focused on the food, but soon you noticed the sweet melody of a familiar song playing in the speakers inside the dome. Your eyes lighted up turning to Wanda who was offering a tiny smile, she really had thought about everything.

“Very well, what’s your ideal date?” You asked all of a sudden, Wanda was taken aback for a moment blinking at the randomness of the question.

“My ideal date?”

“Yep, you just said you couldn’t imagine being this special, but you are special, Wanda. Perhaps, you were never given the chance, but I know you must have something inside your head that cold be define as the perfect one.”

Wanda chewed on her lower lip, narrowing her eyes for a moment before leaning in.

“I have always thought that a walked down a beautiful part, or forest leading to a lake is an ideal date.” She stated thoughtfully, “mom used to take Pietro and me to this beautiful forest near the city back home, she always told us the stories of her youth, and I always thought that would be the perfect place to have a date or a marriage proposal.”

You nodded pursing your lips impressed, Wanda then turned to you her eyes gleaming strangely.

“How about yours?”

You opened your eyes blinking a couple of times before leaning over, “I have to say, this one? It’s at the top five of my favourite dates ever.”

Wanda made a face of disbelief but you stopped her with a gesture of your hand, you drank some wine shaking your head.

“I mean it.” You declared strongly, “I love history, and I love everything that has to do with museums and books, if you want to win my heart, this is the perfect spot to start over. But I would say the perfect date would be on Prague’s Strahov library. Now, that would be quite the adventure.”

The conversation soon flew the same way it did before the incident, you caught Wanda giving in while leaving the stress on her shoulders ease out and her expression relaxed while the conversation grew around the topics she handled well. You never lied to her, while you had your share amount of dates usually they involved other type of activities that, why you liked them at a time, they hardly related with one of your passions.

Laughter filled the planetarium; the acoustics of the place made it easy for the sound to be enhanced. The conversation grew around different topics, and soon whatever happened in the past, whatever physical wounds the both of you carried still were forgotten.

And it was in that moment you remembered why you fell in love with Wanda.

“Thank you, this was delicious.” You glanced at the waitress smiling gently at her, the young woman flushed returning the smile until she caught the glare coming from Wanda.

“I will bring the desert.” The young woman picked up the last of the dishes and hurried out of the place.

You cocked a brow at Wanda who had not stopped following the other woman with her glare, when she returned her attention to you it was only to find your amused smile adorning your features.

“Jealous much?” You chuckled when Wanda clicked her tongue looking away.

“Should I be?”

This time around you did laugh at the absurdity of the comment, Wanda rolled her eyes sending you a withering stare before huffing and crossing her arms. You waited until the dessert had been served and another bottle of wine was brought, this time around the rest of the lights went out and there was only a single one left to create a foggy atmosphere around the centre of the room.

“I think you are adorable when jealous.” You stood up serving the wine, you knew Wanda was following you with her eyes but for now you focused your attention to the task at hand. “I still remember that time in which you saw me and Carol, there is something utterly cute about it.”

“I’m not jealous, and I don’t think being jealous counts as adorable. Or cute.”

You clicked your tongue shaking your head, the glass was soon filled with the red beverage on the bottle. You passed the glass to Wanda who received it, the glint in her eyes told you she was enjoying the changed in the topic. Or perhaps, what she was enjoying was your attention. You nodded to her mobile taking your glass in your hands.

“They give you control of the room, didn’t they?”

Wanda pursed her lips glancing at her phone while nodding.

“Mr. Stark taught me the basics, and how to make sure that everything was perfect for the show.” Wanda mumbled, she gasped when you grabbed the phone seeking the app where Wanda was trying to handle the dome.

“You took my playlist, didn’t you?” This time around there was a hint of affection tainting your voice, Wanda nodded as if it was obvious.

“I wanted this to be about you.” She mumbled well aware that your eyes were now on her.

“Let’s make this about you and me, then.” You ran your thumb around the playlist until you found the song you were looking for. Your mouth broke into a smirk, and the sudden glint of mischief that appeared in your eyes made Wanda winced.

“What are you thinking?”

You left your glass of wine, stretching your hand to Wanda who took it without thinking it twice.

“Dance with me, my love.”

Wanda looked away with a tiny smile on her lips, her cheeks burning up while she started shivering under your hold. You stepped closer waiting for the song to start, your body moulding perfectly against Wanda’s one.

“I trust you know how to dance, Wands?”

“I…I know the basics.” She replied locking her eyes with you.

“Then, let me stir you around the curves.” You winked at her, loving the sound of her laughter.

The sound of the trumpet was the first thing that came into the speakers, and soon the music formed around the voice of Elle Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong. Wanda snickered gasping when you twirled her around before pressing her body to yours, the dance started slowly with you just swinging around.

“Why that song?” Wanda finally asked, you shrugged with memory written in your eyes.

“Mom used to listen to it, America’s mom.” You clarified, “her mother used Elle to perfect her English when they first came here.”

Wanda nodded leaning closer, her arms sneaking around the nape of your neck. You wiggled your eyebrows bringing another chuckled from the young woman.

“And she taught you how to dance?”

“Yep.”

“Mom used to teach us as well,” Wanda rested her forehead against yours, “ours was more classical, but still it was nice. She was a little obsess of making me be a debutant, and Pietro a escort in the traditional sense.”

Wanda furrowed her brows at the memory, but whatever memory came with it soon was forgotten and replaced with a content smile.

“It was actually nice, and I enjoyed it greatly.”

“I would love to dance something classical, any song in mind?” You asked tentatively, Wanda opened her eyes a little taken aback by your inquiry.

“You want to? Really?”

“Yeah, I do.”

Wanda tilted her head thinking for a moment until the song finished and the both of you stood in the middle of the room just looking at one another. The young woman leaned in kissing you tentatively, when she parted from you your heart was already trembling under the sheer passion she shared through the kiss.

“No, perhaps later, right now I want to keep spoiling you.”

Not sooner had she said this, Wanda turned around making her way to the futons resting on the floor. She fixed them with care, full aware of your curious eyes on her; woman made sure to take her jacket off of her and fix everything so the both of you could rest comfortably on the floor.

“What else did you plan?” You finally asked approaching her with the same amount of curiosity, Wanda was smiling shrugging lightly.

“You’ll see, don’t be impatient.” Wanda hesitated for a moment before turning to you, “do you mind serving the wine and bring it over?”

“Not at all.” With one last glance you turned to the table ready to serve the wine when all of a sudden the lights went out.

You froze on the spot, lifting your head to see if perhaps it had been a malfunction in the system or there was something else involved. Soon, you could feel the breeze touching your heated face, the small resounding of drums that went increasing until music of ancient design filled the room and a single dot of white appeared on the far edge of the screen crossing the dome above your head like a shooting star.

You gasped turning around to see Wanda smiling at you, she had dismissed her heels and her coat approaching you while the music transformed into a soothing melody. She locked her eyes with yours, and while you couldn’t see it, you could feel her trembling hands on your blazer helping you out of it while fixing the posture of your sling.

No words were needed it when those fingers worked around the bottoms of your shirt and then she took you to the futons she had fixed on the ground. With a stretch out hand, you allowed her to direct you to the ground almost chocking on your spit when she knelt in front of you taking your shoes off of you.

“Wanda…” You couldn’t keep the silence, but your voice sounded strangled almost fearful to break the spell the both of you seemed to be in.

“This is about you.” She replied simply, crawling to you her lips found yours in the sweetest of kisses the both of you had shared so far.

You found yourself on your back, those lips dancing with yours in a silent invitation. Your heart was beating hard, you were sure the sound of the drums had long ago been replaced by the sound of your heart. Your put your open hand on the back of Wanda’s neck putting her closer until you were on your back and she was almost on top of you.

“I love you.” Wanda all but whisper in your ear, her face almost hidden in the crook of your neck while her warm breath caressed the skin behind your ear.

There was a moment of silence, your heart finally stopped while you registered those words coming from her. You never expected Wanda to say those three words any time soon, you understood the kind of pressure she had been in, and the life she had been living before meeting you. Hell, the amount of time the both of you had known each other wouldn’t give you both enough time to say such a deep declaration, yet you couldn’t deny what you had been feeling for the woman hovering above you at the moment.

Your eyes found those emerald ones, the affection she had always shown you was there gleaming with hope. She waited with her lips swollen, and a dust of pink on her cheeks; Wanda leaned in her nose playing with yours while her eyes closed to engrave the moment in her mind.

“I love you.” She said it again, this time around louder, stronger and you knew she meant it. Every single word.

Your eyes flickered soon to the screen above your head, this time around everything changed and it was as if the both of you were right outside. The night sky was gleaming above your head, with a million started twinkling merrily at you, the start gliding slowly until the movement of the starts start speeding up and soon everything changed and the first constellations came upon the screen.

Wanda could see the stars reflecting in your eyes, she was very careful with her weight always favouring your right side. Her lips curled into a smile when your face lit up with glee at the sight above your head; she remembered the first time she asked for help. America and Hope had been so sure about their proposal that Wanda couldn’t say no, but she opted to add some of the things she had learned from you in those conversations in the middle of the night.

“I love you, too.” You finally replied back, this time around those eyes were filled with affection and completely focused on Wanda.

The young woman dipped her head turning on her side until she was resting right beside you, her hand sneaking comfortably around your midsection.

“I’m sorry it took me this long to say it,” Wanda started but before you could reply she shot you a quick glance shaking her head, “you had been my saviour in so many ways. You can imagine where I was when I first met you.”

“I was a bitch on that meeting.” You recalled, but Wanda merely chuckled nodding.

“You were and I hated you for that.” Wanda turned to you never losing her smile or the affection in her voice, “and then I got to know you and I was…confused. You were making me feel so much, in so little time, and I was afraid.”

Wanda snuggled closer to you, “I’m not afraid anymore, and after thinking about it I realized I love you. As in, I’m in love with you, Y/N, and I don’t think I can stop my heart right now…”

“Why would you stop it?” You inquired turning on your side, wincing when you put some stressed on your left arm.

“I don’t know, what if…”

You leaned in kissing Wanda before she could finish her sentence, Wanda giggled welcoming the kiss before making sure you were back on your back instead of putting some unnecessary stress on your arm.

“Don’t think about the what ifs, Wanda.” You nodded to the sky above your heads, the music had changed into winds and cords, and the story of the first constellations came to be right in front of your eyes.

“I know it is too soon, still. That there is a lot to work on, but if you allowed it…I will be by your side until the last start in the sky had been consume by time.”

Wanda leaned closer to you, her face hidden once more by your neck though this time around you could feel her lips on your neck.

“How do you do it? How can you say such things and make me tremble until there is nothing else but you?”

“It’s a gift.” You chuckled when Wanda lifted her face rolling her eyes.

“I want to be with you, for as long as you want me, Y/N.”

“Then, let’s be together.” You sneaked your arm around her putting her on top of you, “let’s be a family and see where it goes.”

“I love you, and I just wanted to make sure you knew it.” Wanda insisted, you nodded pecking her nose.

“I know.”

“I wanted to make of this night something special,” Wanda said her hand lifting to cup your face and soon her fingers started dancing down your jaw to your neck to the open shirt. For you it was soon evident what she meant, and while she tried to look confident in what she was doing you could see the flash of uncertainty in her eyes.

Her hand was trembling, whatever expertise she had tried to show soon vanished when you realized she was getting closer to your chest.

“You don’t have to…you know?” You could see the glint of hesitation in her green eyes, Wanda clenched them closed in frustration. “Hey, Wands…look at me.”

It took a moment, but then she lifted her eyes and soon she was looking right at you.

“I don’t need sex to know I love you and that my heart is already yours, Wands. And I don’t need you to prove it to me; Wands whenever you are ready I’ll be here more than happy to make you scream in passion.”

Wanda gasped this time around her blush grew from her chest all the way to her cheeks, she tried to look away from you but you made it impossible for her to do so. Your wounded arm finding her face in a single caress.

“How can you be so understanding? God, I just…” Wanda leaned against your touch, “I feel foolish.”

“Never, Love, I just know… and I’m not in any hurry, whenever you are ready, I’ll be ready as well.”

Wanda sighed and whatever tension had been building around her left her body, this time around, when she kissed you she did it with the promise of the future. She laid down by your side, and soon she focused her stare on the stars above your head.

“I love it, this moment just you and me…”

“I thought we need it, you have been amazing with the twins but…” Wanda trailed off shrugging, “I think we were also needing this time to know one another. To actually share in an alone time.”

You smiled nodding your agreement, her hand found yours and soon your fingers intertwined with hers. The stars danced above your heads, and soon your voice joined the music and the different scenes playing with the constellations. You filled in the gaps with the stories you recognized, with Wanda asking questions or helping in the narration until soon you two were talking about mythology and reality.

“I wish this night would never end,” Wanda whispered glancing at the projection of the stars above her head, the show was about to end and she couldn’t help but voice what she had been experimenting in her heart.

“It doesn’t have to be over.” You replied turning to Wanda, the other woman furrowed her brows and you pressed your lips together turning on your side so you were facing her.

“Someday, right?” Wanda replied locking her eyes with yours.

“Someday.”

She smiled snuggling closer to you, “for now I wouldn’t say no to you sleeping with me, I mean without…I…”

You snickered placing a kiss on her forehead, “I know.”

“Did you imagine this will end like this?” Wanda finally asked, her eyes focusing on the sky above her head.

“No, I imagine it will start like this.” You glanced at the same stars, the same shooting star you saw at the beginning gleaming in the distance ready to travel through the sky.

“What do you mean?” Wanda scrunched up her nose, you placed a single kiss on her forehead nodding to the sky.

“I imagine this is how my relationship with you will start, and that after today we just ready to face the new challenges this relationship may bring.” You shrugged glancing down at Wanda, “I’ve been in love before, but…with you? It feels right, as if I was waiting for you.”

Wanda opened her eyes lightly before her expression softened.

“I realised that when…when you stood by my side regardless of my past.” Wanda rested her head on your shoulder, “I think this is the first time I have been in love and, I want you to be the only one.”

“well, love, you have a shooting star to make your wishes a reality.” You pointed to the screen and soon the shooting star crossed the dome and the show was over.

“what did you wish for?” Wanda inquired turning to you, you winked at her nuzzling her nose with yours.

“It’s a secret.”

“That’s not fair! You know what I ask for!”

“I do?” You furrowed your brows, Wanda nodded looking away for a moment before locking her eyes with yours.

“I wish for you to be my one and only love.”

You were shocked for a moment, but soon you answered to such words by kissing Wanda softly.

“And you?” Wanda finally said once you parted from the kiss.

“Me? Well, love, you will have to wait.” You smirked when Wanda seemed indignant at your declaration.

“Oh, come on!”

You pocked her nose, leaning in to kiss her pouting face away.

“Nu-uh, Princess, patience is a virtue, and I know you will know what I wish for with time.”

Wanda groaned in mock frustration, she was about to stand up but her hand grabbed her phone and soon a new projection started in the dome. You raised a single eyebrow when Wanda pinned you to the futon, her lips curling into a mischievous smile.

“Well, then, meanwhile I will just do the second part of my wish.”

“Second part?” Wanda nodded leaning in.

“Yep, I wish to kiss you, and show you how much I love you, how much I thank the skies for having me given the opportunity of meeting you.” Wanda then leaned closer to your face, “I wish to kiss you until the story above our heads is no more and the only option you have is to take me home and spend the night with me.”

“Then, my lady, allow me to make those wishes a reality.”

Their laughter soon filled the dome, and it came accompanied by a sudden gasp and the sound of kissing and playful banter.

Wanda never imagined that her decision to leave Vision would end up with her finding herself, while in the process getting a job and making new friends. Not even in her wildest dreams did Wanda imagine that she would come across someone like you that, for the very first moment create a lasting impression on her to the point Wanda decided to explore the relationship.

Her past had finally stayed in the past, with Vision in jail and her getting the full custody of her children, Wanda now was sure she could secure her future while at the same time seek out the peace and happiness she so desperately needed. Now, with you kissing her slowly while sharing a moment of pure, and unrestrained happiness, Wanda knew that every single decision she had taken had led her to that moment, it had led her to you.

And she didn’t regret it.

With you, Wanda understood that she didn’t need to lie to herself, that she didn’t need to hide or to run. With you, Wanda discovered she could be herself and finally give in.

To be loved, and to love.

That was all that matter.

**********

Three years later

Morning had arrived with a bright sun, and no clouds in the sky.

You served the coffee while glancing out the window, the sound of running footsteps brought a smile to your face knowing that the holidays were the perfect opportunity for the twins to break havoc. No sooner had you thought this, Billy and Tommy came through the door wearing the baggy pants and the t-shirt they had chosen to wear that day.

“Morning, Y/N!” Billy came to you wrapping his arms on your midsection before going to the fridge, Tommy chuckled sitting down on the stool waiting until Billy brought two glasses and set the orange juice on the table.

“You guys have a lot of energy for a Monday morning.” You hummed when they shook their heads innocently.

“Nu-uh, just…America told us she would take us to the lake.” Tommy said shrugging.

“And, we haven’t said anything about…you know.” Billy mumbled looking around the room before settling his eyes on you, “so we thought you would be happy to know we will be out of your hair today!”

You chuckled ruffling his hair affectionately, setting your coffee on the table while serving the orange juice to the boys.

They had grown a great deal and now at seven they were far smarter than you or even Wanda gave them credit for. Three years ago, you never thought possible to fall in love again, nor did you thought whatever started as a tentative relationship would end up being the best that happened to you. You glanced at the boys that started talking animatedly while mentioning the different places America and Kate were supposed to taken them to, you smiled knowing your sister adored them and was about ready to do whatever they wanted as long as she got to spend some time to them.

You sighed leaning against the counter taking a long sip from the coffee, in the last years a lot of things had changed in your life. America had finally found her passion, she had decided to pursue a career in international affairs and her path led her directly into one of the most important universities in Europe, which ended up with Kate studying a couple of miles away from her. Whatever had started as a school crush, it had developed into a serious relationship that both of them had dealt with maturity.

You had finally gotten the time you needed to organise the business, and while your presence was always required when important matters arise, you had taken it upon yourself to be in charge of the development section of the company. It was easier, and it gave you the time you needed to spend with Wanda and the children.

The sound of childish argument brough a smile into your face, soon you caught the well-known voice of your girlfriend and your heat melt right away when Wanda appeared behind the hall wearing a familiar frown while placing her hands on her hips.

“Okay, you two, stop this argument right now or there won’t be any outing with America.”

“Yes, mum!” The twins said at the same time focusing on their beverages.

You locked your eyes with Wanda, your lips curling into a smile while the woman softened completely making her way to where you were standing casually. She leaned in pecking your lips while stealing your mug.

“Morning.” You whispered wrapping your arm around her hips, she giggled leaning forward before accepting a deeper kiss.

“Ugh, mom!”

“Y/N!”

You finished the kiss turning to them, “I will hold you to this moment when you guys bring over your partners home and decided to kiss them in front of us.”

“No!”

“Never!”

“I would never be this corny!”

“Never!”

You chuckled rolling your eyes, Wanda leaned in kissing you one more time before going to the coffee maker and serving another cup of coffee. You glanced at your watch knowing America would be there any moment now, your heart beating a tad bit faster while the heavy void you had felt on your lower abdomen increased and your chest tightened at what you had planned for the day.

Tommy and Billy glanced at one another before placing their hands on their mouth and snickering, you mock glared at them and the sudden exchanged didn’t go amiss to Wanda. The young woman narrowed her eyes standing right beside you.

“Okay, what is it?” She asked, and her suspicions only grew when the three of you answered at the same time.

“Nothing!”

You glanced at the twins, the three of you started laughing while Wanda softened her features. Even if she got curious, and a little wary, she couldn’t help but love these moments in which you and the twins would behave like a family. Once she had given in, you became the light of her life, your smile and your occurrences were always a source of amusement and tenderness, and the twins had come to love you in ways Wanda thought would be difficult to do so. They accept you faster than what she thought, and ever since that day after the planetarium you and her had been together in the good, the bad, the ugly and the pretty.

“You guys…” Wanda started but whatever she was going to say was cut short by a knock on the door.

“Save by the bell, guys! That must be America, love.” You gave Wanda a quick peck on her lips before running towards the door, once more the twins looked at one another before holding back their snickers.

“Okay, what is it?”

“Nu-uh, mom, it’s a secret!” Tommy said emptying the glass in a single sip.

“We promised not to say anything, mom.” Billy continued shrugging before approaching Wanda and offering her a hug, “but I love you!”

Wanda narrowed her eyes hugging Billy back, “I love you too, both of you.”

“Hey!! Where are my favourite guys in the whole world?!”

America stretched her arms to welcome Billy and Tommy, Kate rolled her eyes moving past them with a smile to greet Wanda. Wanda chuckled when their attention turned to Kate, America approached her wrapping her arms around the young woman.

“Ugh, I missed you so much, Wands! How’s everything? My sister still giving you trouble?”

“Hey! I never gave her any trouble, did I?” You pouted standing beside Wanda, the other woman shook her head putting you closer to her.

“Never, my love, you are a well-behaved girlfriend whenever you and the twins are not playing to break havoc.” Wanda pecked your lips turning to America. “Everything is perfect, but I have a feeling my girlfriend and my sons are planning something I should know about.”

This times around America opened her eyes with her mouth hanging opened, Kate gasped and the twins put their hands on their mouths. You snorted rolling your eyes, with this level of secrecy it was a surprised Wanda had not really discovered what you had planned for her that day.

“No, I mean there is no…Oh, look at the time, guys are you ready?” Kate babbled looking around while trying to evade any interaction with Wanda who had her eyes on her.

America snorted softening her stare while her girlfriend took the twins to their room, she then turned to Wanda who had a single eyebrow lifted waiting for an explanation she would not receive. At least, not from America.

“Don’t look at me, I’m just a passerby ready to take the twins on an adventure of a lifetime.” She said lifting her arms, Wanda snorted turning to you.

“You know, sooner or later I will find out your secrets?”

“I’m counting on it, Wands.” You whispered leaning in to kiss her, “now, how about you go and take a bath and I help America around.”

Wanda nodded dreamily, she gave you a quick smile before turning to America and giving the young woman another hug.

“It is good to see you again, America, see you tonight at dinner, right?”

“Yeo, we will be there!” America glanced at Wanda walking away, she waited until she was pretty sure Wanda had left before turning to you. “Well?”

“Well? You’re the one who should tell me if everything is ready!” You whispered harshly at your sister glancing down the corridor before settling your eyes on America.

The young woman rolled her eyes, but her lips played a familiar smile while she tapped something on her phone. Soon you were giving a fine idea of what she had prepared with the help of Kate and your friends; it had been hard at first to get what you needed to make of that day special. Your face lit up completely, and America could see the ghost of a smile on your lips while your eyes scanned the images she had store on her phone.

When you first shared with America your intentions, the young woman had been excited. In the last couple of years, she had seen the love between you and Wanda grow in something completely different. It was not the same relationship you shared with Shuri, and certainly it wasn’t the same type of relationship Wanda had shared with Jarvis. The both of you had been the best that could happen to the other, Wanda had learnt to love and be love, to trust in herself while also trust in the affection others held for her. You learnt to let go and to actually trust in the person beside you, you got to see how Wanda was ready to be a part of your life without losing her own little universe with the twins.

It had been a rocky path, there were fights, and sometimes it was quite difficult to fight against the demons of the past. But, America knew, if it hadn’t been because of the deep love you two felt for one another, the relationship would have been over years ago.

“I think she will love it, and I’m just…” America trailed off before offering you a quick hug, “I think this is amazing.”

You sighed putting your hand inside your pocket, the squared box resting inside your pocket.

“Thank you, this looks amazing.” You glanced at the hall before turning to America, “at what time you think we can go over there?”

“Mmm, I would say the best would be around 4pm, we will be there waiting for you so…” America waved her hands excited, “God, I can’t hardly wait, please tell me if anything happens.”

“I will, Kiddo, thank you.” You wrapped your arms around her, “I really missed you.”

“I missed you too.” America chuckled when she caught the excited chatter of the twins and Kate coming over, “now, I will take them off of your plate for a while, we will have time to get up to date, for now, go!”

“Yes, ma’am.”

You watched as they left in the midst of laughter and light conversation, your hand sneaking inside your pocket putting out the black box you had bought a long time ago. Your heart skipped a beat, your hand clenching tightly around it ready to give the next step in your relationship with Wanda. Your lips broke into a tender smile, the memories of the last three years filling up your mind with determination and love.

“Y/N?”

You put the box away turning to see Wanda approaching you slowly, the swinging of her hips and that flirty smile she wore made your mouth go dry and your lower abdomen tingled with anticipation.

“Yes?” You asked, Wanda came to you chewing on her lower lip playfully.

“Since the kids are gone, and you and I are alone, I thought…we could shower together, don’t you think?” This was said in a low, husky tone, her lips wrapping around your earlobe while her hands sneaked inside your shirt.

“I think…you have a wicked mind, Wands.” You replied, but before Wanda could do or said anything else you took her in your arms crashing your lips to hers.

Needless to say, you and she left the home later than what you should, but the both of you had satiated the thirst you had for one another.  Love evident in your faces, as you walked around the city hand by hand.

_________________________________

The country of Sokovia was a beautiful land with a rich past and a colourful landscape.

Wanda had been excited when you announced the trip, not really believing you were going to comply with her wishes until you present her with the four plane tickets. By the time you four had arrived at the city of Novi Grad, Wanda had been completely excited telling you and her children all about her hometown. She spoke of the difficult times they had lived, and the wonderful things the new government had done to fix the mistakes of the past.

Billy and Tommy had been avid listeners, and they had started talking to Wanda and to you in sokovian while Wanda was just completely happy with the development on their vacations. You had been just happy to see her smile, to see the excitement in her eyes when she pointed to all the places she remembered.

“I still can believe you brought me here.” Wanda said sitting down on the table right outside a beautiful balcony looking at the far away mountains covering half of the city.

“Why not?” You replied taking the menu with a smile, “if anything, I should be sorry for taking so long, but you know? Life has been getting in the way, and I wanted for you to have time to enjoy this place.”

Wanda didn’t know how you did it, the way you were always giving it your all to make her happy. She leaned forward placing her hand on top of yours.

“This is perfect, and it’s the perfect time.”

You smiled back at her, looking at the menu while glancing at the watch on your wrist. You were getting restless as the time for the main event approached; Wanda was looking at her menu pursing her lips before returning her attention to you.

“Can I order something for you? There is something in here I want you to try out…” She trailed off glancing away for a moment, a shadow crossing her eyes, “it is something mom used to cook for me and Pietro and I just…”

“I would love to, Wands. Go ahead, you’re the expert so we will do as you said.” You replied closing the menu, you waited until the food had been ordered before leaning forward playing with Wanda’s fingers.

“You know? Now that you mentioned this about the food, I remember the story you told me once.”

“Which one?” Wanda furrowed her brows blinking away while trying to remember.

“The one about the forest, is around here, isn’t it?”

The way her eyes opened wide, and her whole face lit up made your heart skipped a beat. You couldn’t take your eyes off of her as she turned around trying to point out the direction in which the forest was located.

“Yes! Oh, I can believe you remember…”

“I remembered everything you tell me, love.” You replied, and it was the tone of voice you used what made Wanda turned to you with narrowed eyes, you softened your features offering a reassuring smile to her.

“I always make the effort to have it in my mind so I can make sure to bring happiness to you, to see the very same expression you are wearing at the moment.”

Wanda turned her head away, her cheeks burning bright red while she smiled tenderly at your words. Even after all this time you still got to make her feel so self-conscious of the love you profess to her.

“I love you for that.” Wanda finally said, and you smiled back at her winking.

“Well, what about you and I go over there after lunch? I’m pretty sure at this time of the year must be quite the sight.”

“You mean it?” Wanda exclaimed excitedly, you nodded and soon thank the heavens you were sitting down for the kiss she gave you made your knees trembled and your whole body tingled with anticipation.

******

The afternoon was falling slowly, the wind was cold so the burning sun above your heads was not as strong as it could have been in a dry weather.

You and Wanda walked down the city, your hand joined in a single embrace while conversation flew with easiness. The topics varied from school, to your work, to the recent happenings of the world, to the twins and America; soon you two found yourselves talking about movies and books, the places you would like to visit or the worlds you would like to be in.

Life with Wanda was never bored, and every single time you discovered something new about her that made you fall in love with her even more.

Her excitement at being in her country was something you would cherish forever.

She dragged you down the streets, and then down the pebbled road leading to the forest. The place had changed since she was last there, it was now a national park that had been taken care off with the strictest rules and cares a country could provide to such a beautiful setting.

You took a deep breath when the road spread before your eyes, your eyes lifted to the signs, most of them pointing to different sections of the forest. Your eyes finally fell on the word Lake, and you lifted your hand to point it out to your girlfriend.

“There, lake, can we go there?”

“Yes, of course!”

You chuckled when she just grabbed your hand again, she twirled around wrapping her arms around your neck leaning in to kiss you slowly.

“Have a told you how much I love you?” She asked playfully, you placed your hands on her waist helping her walked backwards while you advanced down the road with her in your arms.

“Mmhm, not recently, no. I think I need a reminder.”

Wanda giggled leaning in, her kisses were soft and tentative, “I love you, Y/N, every time I think this is not possible, I fall in love with you even more and I just…”

Your heart shrank at her confession, putting her to you with your lips moulding against hers you poured all the love you felt for her.

“I love you to, Wands.”

Wanda sighed standing by your side lifting her face to the trees above her, her eyes gleaming happily just as the both of you advanced towards the lake. The forest was located it twenty minutes away from the city, and the entrance had been built around a public parking lot where people could acquire all the necessary materials for camping or a nice picnic. Some of the different paths had been fixed to give easy access to the people that visit the place, but the road leading to the lake had been left untouched with the nature almost claiming it back.

You were admiring the huge trees surrounding the area, the sound of the birds and other animals running around to hide away from the humans. You lifted your stare to see the blue sky above your head, and the cold breeze touching your heated skin. Everything was quiet and peaceful, only the sound of your footsteps seemed to interrupt the sounds of the nature.

Your eyes lifted squinting them when you spot the opening right ahead of you, your lips curling slightly when you finally spotted something else. You had arrived to the lake, with a quick gesture you stood before Wanda stopping her advanced towards her destination.

“What is it?” Just like she did early in the morning, she narrowed her eyes with a glint of suspicion gleaming in them. You shifted your weigh from one foot to the other, your hand scratching the back of your neck while your eyes danced around instead of facing Wanda.

You stood before her, your hand sneaking inside your pocket until you brough forth a single blindfold. She cocked a brow, half-amused, half-expectant at what you had planned.

“I may or may not have planned something for you.” You said tentatively, Wanda snorted but all you could see in her face was love and amusement.

“Figures, and I bet Billy, Tommy, America and Kate are in it?” She already knew the answer, but there was something else she couldn’t pinpoint to.

“Yep.” You admitted lifting your hand, “there is something… I mean, it is a surprised.”

“And I have to wear the blindfold.” Wanda grabbed the piece of clothing, never losing her smile, she winked at you, “kinky, perhaps later on we can use it for other…kind of surprised?”

You laughed out loud shaking your head while helping the brunette put on the blindfold.

“I love how your wicked mind works, Mrs. Maximoff.”

“Well, I love it when you play along, Mrs. Y/L/N.”

You let out a deep breath, the sun was still high in the sky and now Wanda stood before you blindfolded. Her hand found yours, squeezing comfortingly with that beautiful smile you had come to love and crave.

“Are you okay?” She finally asked, you swallowed down your doubts nodding before you remembered she couldn’t see you.

“I am.” Then, as an afterthought, “I’m just nervous.”

Wanda brought your hand to her lips, never losing her smile.

“Whatever it is you prepared for me, I know I would love it and…Y/N…there is no one else I would love to be with right now, you are the love of my life.”

You chuckled loving the tenderness Wanda used when talking to you, the fact she had come to know your insecurities and was always ready to reassure you of her love and your worth.

“And you are mine, Wands, now let’s go…”

You grabbed her hand and without wasting any more time you led her down the road towards the lake.

The lake was a great extension of water that spread out before a small beach surrounded by the forest. It was filled with grass, trees and bushes, with a crystalline water that was reflecting the light of the sun and the colour of the sky at the moment. This part of the forest was usually used for light lunches, and some swimming but at this time of the year the place was emptied and you had taken advantage of your money to get this small spot for you and your family for a couple of hours.

There was a single bench that had been decorated with red and pink, there were some balloons with a bucket filled with ice and wine. You helped your girlfriend so she could sit on the bench, all around her there was nothing more than flowers, blue lilies and orchids, the full scene had been planned out and built with the help of America and Kate that had just come from their hiding place with the twins.

You smiled at them putting a finger to your lips, standing before Wanda you pulled your mobile out of your pocket and let a single song filled the silence around the both of you.

“Oh, that’s…” Wanda trailed off when she recognized the trumpets and the melodic voice of Elle Fitzgerald. “Y/N…”

Your name sound beautifully on her lips, you took a deep breath looking around the place knowing you had chosen right. The lake was gleaming to your right, while the forest stood to your left, the mountains wearing a white bald head projected a protective shadow on the valley. This was what Wanda had always desired, what she had harboured in her heart when she still believed in love.

“Y/N…” She repeated your name, this time around with a hint of apprehension in her voice.

You knelt before her, your left knee touching the ground while your right knee bend to hold your elbow up your hand opening the box you had been carrying with you for over a year.

“You can take the blindfold off, Wanda.” You finally said, and your voice trembled with the sheer emotion you were experimenting at the moment.

Wanda took her blindfold, soon her breath caught in her throat and whatever sight she had before her became a blurred of colours and familiar images. Right in front of her was the lake and the forest of her childhood, the very same she had visited in her mind and memory after leaving Sokovia behind. Her green eyes flickered around until they found your eyes, and soon they fell upon the box in your hand and the silver ring resting in there.

The music was still playing around the both of you, and Wanda wanted to see if there was someone else or if the both of you were alone. But she was incapable of looking everywhere but at you.

Your lips trembled, your hand trying to hold still as you cleared your throat lifting your chin to face her with determination and love.

“Wanda Maximoff, I have brought you here because I love you.” You stated taking a deep breath making sure you never wavered in your intentions. “I realized a long time ago I can’t even think of the possibility of not having you by my side, of not living and growing old with you.”

Wanda sat frozen on the bench, her heart hammering hard against her chest while her stomach drop and her body tingled all over until a heavy pressured settled on her chest.

“I have loved you from the moment I met you, I just didn’t know it yet.” You chuckled shaking your head, “and I would love to make you happy, to love you, to cherish you, and to be your friend, your partner if you allow me…so, today in this place and with my heart on my hands, I want to ask you…”

“Yes…” Wanda whispered, you furrowed your brows shaking your head.

“No, wait, I need to ask…”

“Marry me?” Wanda asked, her voice trembling and her lips breaking into a content smile, you frowned though your eyes gleamed with amusement.

“No, you marry me, please?”

Wanda threw herself at you, her arms wrapped tightly around you while you fell to the ground hugging her back. She was sobbing, her voice a mere whispered in your ear.

“Yes, yes, I will…Yes, I marry you.”

You laughed turning your head and kissing her deeply.

“Then, yes, I marry you too, Wands.”

America and Kate both rolled their eyes, but the twins were squealing excitedly no longer able to hold themselves the run towards you and Wanda joining in the embrace.

Wanda turned to them surprised, returning their hug while turning to you and stretching her left hand where you placed the ring on her finger. Your smile was huge, and it was matching hers with the twins hugging both of you while talking excitedly.

“That means I can call you mom now?!” Tommy finally asked with you almost choking on your spit.

Wanda rolled her eyes fixing his hair before lifting her eyes to glance at you.

“Only if she wants to, Tommy.”

“You want to, don’t you, Y/N?” Tommy asked pouting, you ruffled his hair putting him to you.

“Only if I get to call you Tommy bear!”

Laughter soon filled the lake, with everyone enjoying the rest of the afternoon while you alongside with Kate, America and Wanda toast to the engagement.

“I can believe you…” Wanda closed the distance tilting her head to taste your lips with hers, you smile into the kiss with your hands placing themselves on her hips.

“You remember…” She said softly, in between kisses.

“I never forgot, Wands. With you, everything is easier, you know? I love you, and I just…I want to make you happy.”

“You make me happy already.” She replied leaning into your embrace, “but I will be complete the moment I can call you my wife.”

You smiled placing a single kiss on her forehead.

“I will be complete the moment I can call you wife as well.”

Wanda turned in your arms, her eyes following her children while they talked and played along with America and Kate. You placed your chin on her shoulder, watching the same scene with a soft smile adorning your features. The young woman lifted her hand to see the ring you had placed moments ago, a green stone that matched her eyes and white gold recovering the ring.

Her life was finally hers, and her happiness was finally something she knew she deserved and that was right there for her to live it. Wanda never imagined the moment she made the decision of leaving Vision her life would change so drastically, she never even played with the idea of falling in love again or finding someone ready to be patient with her past and fall in love with her.

Wanda never entertained the idea of anyone wanting to marry someone like her, damage and with two kids that were still growing up. Then, she met you. And she couldn’t imagine being without you by her side.

With you, she learnt to love again, to trust and to give herself without fear.

“Tonight, America and Kate are taking the twins to a festival and then back to their Air BnB so…we have the house for ourselves, to celebrate.” You whispered playfully, Wanda leaned back placing her hands on yours.

She tilted her head with her lips teasing yours.

“Then, let’s celebrate with them first, before I show you my appreciation for all the wonderful things you do for me.”

“It’s a deal, Love.”

“Y/N.” She called your name with a serious tone, you turned to her welcoming her kiss before smiling goofily at her.

“What was that for?”

“I love you.” She said simply, you softened squeezing her hand comfortingly.

“I love you, now and forever.”

And, of that, Wanda didn’t have any doubt for she too love you now and forever, until the end of time.

[natsunenuko]

TW // mental issues, mental absue, harassment, surgery/blood

I'm sorry this one is so long, but please carry on reading. It's a chance for me to not only speak about the situation but let out some steam too. It is unfortunate this announcement comes at the same time the flood occurs on the south of my home country (Poland) and I'm in the endangered zone, luckily so far safe, as I feel my head can't handle more stress.

It's been so long since I've been this personal online. I realized how I didn't feel the urge to vent for 3-4 years by now which is a sign of improving mental health. But my healing is still a process, and I'm afraid it's too hard to carry this rock alone at this point. I fought my thoughts if I should do this and I think just as deeply as I write right now. Yet, I know it's better late than never and I thank deeply my friends for helping me out recently as well as in the past in my lowest. I wholeheartedly owe my life to you.

I couldn't ask for better friends. As years verified, even long lasting relationships might be nothing but a mask and I had to learn the hard way. I ended a friendship of 13 years at the time over a misunderstanding. Other person I put my trust on was nothing but a groomer with morally corrupted sexual tendencies who would take advange of a group of minors while being the only adult among them, yet acting like a person much younger than all of them and pressuring all their mental issues on children instead of seeking help. The latter, I might speak of more in detail when I'm ready.

Long time ago I tried calling out for help but back then, the intrusive thoughts won; "Others have it worse, just work harder.", "No one will give you anything for free, no one will care.", "What people will think of you?". and I would only speak about these things in a closed circle of my friends.

I tried my best in silence by not giving up on my creative passion, working restlessly for years, improving. Hoping I could reach the point I can sustain myself purely on what I make.

But the problem is not being self-sufficient. And it's not about my art...

All of my life it has been me, my momma and my granny. The other two important figures weren't there for us, by choice. (which is hard to say if losing someone you loved is worse than not being cared for in the first place) My rather young self at the time didn't put much thought about it as I didn't understand it but something always felt wrong; my only issues at the time was being "that weird, quiet kid with little to no friends". But despite the hardships, my momma has always been my hero, working without a time for a break or rest so we could live happily, to afford something special from time to time.

However in 2014 my momma has been hospitalised and almost lost her life to wrongly treated ovarian cyst (cyst rapture), with enough blood loss to require emergency surgery...

From that point on things went downhill and the result of that we feel to this very day. To stay afloat we fell into a severe dept. (We didn't have any savings, could only rely on borrowing money or loans) And since I was a child as all of this happened, I've only learned about it all throughfully as I entered adulthood, so I wouldn't need to worry about anything and "just be a kid". Which I really understand, but it doesn't make it easier to handle.

And by now, for several years I keep on trying to earn money, so I could free my momma from this chain and let her live, not survive. I always wanted to get through this quietly, because I never, ever wanted to burden anyone with my home problems. But it grew to a point I might need to grab anything to climb towards the light

The goal is $10 000... which is scarily large number.

I list all the options but Kofi is preferred to keep track of the funds!

My commissions are HERE! (the sheet will receive a slight update in upcoming days) My Kofi is HERE! (Level 4 Tea is free headshot drawing every month!) HERE's other services I do (adopts, brushes, etc) I plan to do paid requests for my friday streams on occasion! Anything else I come up with I hope to include in here! Every person who donates will be part of "Thank you" list where I hope to shoutout everybody, cause every penny matters. I want this situation to end...

[mvltisstuff]

how to disappear - e.b

summary: after a series of tragic losses, y/n’s bright mood begins to disappear. so buck and the 118 try to bring it back

evan buckley x reader

this lowkey broke my heart a bit 🥲 i am def not the biggest fan of this, it was just rushed but i hope you still enjoy, leave any requests you’d like i’m in a big 911 writing era :)

10 minutes of cpr on the way to the hospital, rapid beeping on the machine, blood on the ground. hen places a soft hand on y/n’s arm, and pulls it away from the patients body. “y/n,” she says, making pitying eye contact with her. “time of death, 14:36.”

y/n sits back with a brush to her hairline with the heel of her palm and a sigh. she looks down at her hands and uniform, covered in a man’s blood. a son, a friend, and she feels like she just took that from him.

it’s been person after person, it feels. like she’s failing at her job and is failing all these people. she wants to scream. a few days before, she had lost a girl, new to adulthood, who had driven her car off the side of the road due to a drunk driver. her best friend, watching from the side and being held back by bobby and athena, was wailing in agony from watching the life escape her soul sister.

that wasn’t the last time, it’s been a few. everyone tries to reassure her that she did everything she could, and she knows she did. but was it enough? y/n’s been quiet, not wanting to hurt anything else around her. she felt like everything was glass in her hands and she couldn’t help but drop it. her eyes were dry and red from the sleepless nights and tearful showers, and her arms were tired from the endless compressions and the feeling of being completely burnt out.

buck had recognized this feeling, they all had, but it hurt to see her beating herself up so much over it. y/n already felt ridiculous, as this is partially what she signed up for, and he didn’t want her to feel ashamed. the 118 has been assigned to a ton of casualties and bad accidents recently, but it seems like they’ve been piling up and she feels like it is a result of her work.

everyone knows y/n is great. she’s smart and careful in her work, always checking over herself and being gentle with everyone, young and old.

another quiet night at home, y/n picks around her food not being able to find her appetite. the screams of the friend from earlier rang in her ear and the flatline of machines were stinging her brain. the pounding headaches were washed away with another tylenol, as buck tries to start another conversation.

“so, um,” he starts, quietly. “eddie invited us over to dinner tomorrow, do you wanna go?”

he tells a white lie because buck sort of invited himself to dinner. he wants to help y/n, and make her feel better and know that there are people still alive from her rescues. “maybe, i’m not sure.” she says, not having the energy to go tomorrow as she wants to just come home and fight with her sleep again. buck nods, deciding not the fight it. his heart breaks seeing her in this condition, and it pains him even more to know she’s helped him in this situation. he’s had his own losses, and he so desperately tries to climb out of the pit it puts him on. y/n was always the hand, the ladder that he called to climb out. he wanted more than anything to be hers.

they don’t teach you in training how to deal with this. they warn you, surely, but you always try to sugarcoat it in your mind. however, the agonizing sobs and screams will wake you up at night. you remember the names, the family, the details, the autopsy, the medicine that was inserted. every small detail haunts you, until you learn to handle the pain. it never gets easier to lose someone on the job, but the embraces and relief from saving someone is an incredible feeling.

“i’m just going to head to bed,” y/n says, her voice cracking as it’s barely above a whisper. she walks over to buck, placing her plate in the dishwasher. “i’ll meet you upstairs, i’m going to shower first.”

buck nods and gives her a sweet smile that conceals a bit of pity. watching her smiles fade from feeling like she’s not good enough makes his heart skip a beat in the worst way.

a few days later, y/n stayed a little longer at work than buck did. maddie had asked him to watch jee-yun, and when y/n walked in, she saw buck playing with her in their living area. he has a bright smile on his face in response to the little words and babbles from jee. “hey, baby. wanna come join us in here?”

she had completely forgotten that they agreed to babysit. she sighed and mumbled at buck for a minute. “i, um, forgot we’re watching her.”

“it’s ok, we just got done pulling uncle bucks hair out,” he says, scooping jee up and blowing light kisses into her baby cheeks. “who’s that, jee? y/n’s home!”

y/n forces out a small grin, making the side of her mouth raise a bit. “sorry, guys. i was gonna call it an early night, it’s been a really long day.” she replies, because she has no more energy left to give. she feels like shit, leaving her boyfriend and his niece alone, who she adores completely. she doesn’t want to bother their time together.

“oh,” buck says, surprised. y/n never denies extra time with jee-yun, always begging maddie and chimney to bring her over for a bit. “i get it, honey. go lay down.” he says, the smile on his face growing again in attempts to make her feel more comfortable.

“thanks, buck.” y/n walks over to the two, leaving a kiss on bucks lips and one on jee’s forehead. when she walks away, stepping back up the stairs like her muscles are worn out, jee mumbles out the few letters of her name.

“i know, jee-yun,” buck says, comforting her. “she’ll be back soon, i hope.”

days pass and y/n’s brightness that comes into the room when she walks in still isn’t back. buck has tried to give her space, but also giving her the love she needs to feel better. sitting around the table, the team talks for a little.

“kid, something on your mind?” bobby asks, taking a bite of his breakfast while looking at a zoned-out buck.

“s-sorry, cap,” he stumbles over his words. “it’s y/n. i just feel so bad, i wish i could magically fix everything but…”

“it’s hard, she’s been really taking it on these calls.”

“i’m just worried, i don’t know how much more stress she can handle.”

“she’s tough,” eddie adds. “i think she just needs time.” buck nods, still feeling indifferent on the situation.

the alarm sounds later in the night, and they climb into the truck for the last call of the shift. they’re all tired, ready to go home, but also ready to face whatever battle the world has for them tonight. y/n rides in the back, glaring out the window. she listens intently to the instructions in her headphones, and they climb out of the truck.

they see yet another tragic incident on the side of the road, a massive delivery truck had been completely turned upside down with two people inside of it. they team had all sprint up the the flipped vehicle, getting on the ground to see the damage to their bodies. “hi, sir,” y/n says first. “can you tell me your name?”

“r-richard.”

“ok, richard, can you tell me if you feel this?” y/n applies pressure to his legs. he shakes his head, and begins to panic at the numbness in his lower half.

“it’s ok, stay still,” y/n reassures him. “we’re gonna help you. can you tell us your friends name?”

“his n-name- is tyler.” he answers. “am i going to die in here?”

“we are all here to help you, richard, you are in some of the best hands out there,” y/n stands up and faces hen and chimney. “we have numbness in his legs, passengers name is tyler.”

“got it,” chim says, jogging over to see his friends condition.

on the side, after excusing themselves, the team meets up. “driver is not looking good, cap. i think the damage was already done when we got on scene.” hen says.

“can we get the other person out safely?” bobby asks, hesitantly. they all nod, knowing what is going to have to happen. “he’s pinned under that seat, he doesn’t have enough time.”

“what? no, we have to get both of them out!” y/n interjects.

“we can’t, y/n. we have to keep richard comfortable while they work to get tyler out.”

“but-“

“there’s nothing we can do, y/n/n,” buck says, stepping in. “there’s nothing that can save him.”

y/n keeps her cool, just barely letting the pot boil over the edge. she walks back over to richard without any directions, but knows that she is the one to keep him comfortable. “this is it, huh?” he coughs a bit, blood pooling at the corner of his lips.

“you have a family, richard?” y/n asks, hoping to keep his mind off the pain that has already been minimized with morphine. no morphine in the world can save his family from the pain they’ll endure.

he nods, slowly. “i have three girls and two boy, and my beautiful wife.”

“wow, a full house, isn’t it?” y/n laughs.

“we have, two dogs too.”

“can i hear their names?”

“the girls are, layla, and she’s the oldest.” he starts, ready to take the time to explain his precious kids. tears are already forming in y/n’s eyes, and she’s relieved he is able to talk over her. “she’s so smart, she was valedictorian, jesus, i was so loud at graduation. and then there’s jake, he’s so amazing, he’s the sweetest kid. and then there’s makenna and sarah, they’re two little,” he pauses to take a few deeps breaths. “firecrackers. and then the youngest is nathan, and he is a r-replica of his mom.”

“what’s their mom like?” the drilling and buzzing from the other side is faint, the two’s thoughts being drowned out by the stories of his family.

“oh, she’s amazing,” he smiles, with red-stained teeth. “the- the most beautiful woman. you think i could call her?” her shaky hand reaches over to his phone that had fallen out of the truck and onto the top. she puts the phone up to his ear, holding it, as some more jargon about the rescued man comes through.

“h-hey honey!” he says, like it’s almost muscle memory. “i, uh, it’s ok, i just wanted to call and see how everything is.” he smiles at the chaos on the other side. “can you, uh, put me on speaker phone?”

the tears are falling down y/n’s face freely, as the sirens of the other ambulances are turned on to drive away with other paramedics. her breaths are shaky, and the team gathers behind them. glass cuts the skin on her knees, but she is not fazed by the feeling. the husband, son, father, says his final goodbyes to his family, and the final breath from his lips is stolen in a matter of seconds. one of the police officers leans down and takes the phone, speaking to the widow and her young family.

y/n places a few fingers on the side of his neck, feeling for a non-existent pulse. her voice cracks, and a few broken cries come out of her sad mind. “i’m so sorry, richard. i’m so, so sorry.” she repeats, over and over again before her boyfriend has to remove her from the nightmare. she yanks her gloves off and wipes the mix of blood from her hands, sweat, and tears off her face.

buck has never seen her breakdown like this, and it was honestly one of his biggest fears. he knew it was going to happen, he just hoped he would make her feel better before it did. “i really tried, buck, i did, i couldn’t keep him up…”

“i know, it’s not your fault. none of this has ever been your fault.”

as y/n’s pained thoughts surround her mind on the way back to the station, she climbs out of the truck and slowly walks back into the locker room. she ignores everyone around her. she tries to ignore everyone, but buck is too quick to understanding her that he is following right behind.

“let’s just go home, buck,” y/n says, her voice is raspy from the sobs and exhaustion.

“i need you to know that you are doing everything you can,” he says, stepping closer to her.

“i know, buck. i’m not doing this right now.”

“you are amazing at this y/n. it is not your fault. these people were doomed from the second they called into dispatch. if anything, you were there for them when we got there.”

“then why? why does this keep happening, buck? since you seem to have an answer for all of this why can’t you tell me that? why does it feel like it’s my fault?” she snaps, raising her voice with him near. she’s not yelling at him, more at herself.

“y/n, please,” buck whispers. “i don’t have the answer for everything. but i know for a fact that you are doing the best you can. and that is enough. and i will say it is enough for the rest of time until you believe me.”

y/n stops and stands still. she looks at him with sad eyes, her mouth opened lightly. she shrugs her shoulders and feels like every word is draining her from everything she has left. “i cant sleep without hearing them, buck.”

“oh, my god. baby,” he says, rushing over to her and pulling her in before her heartbroken knees gave out under her. his arms wrapped around her waist and sat her weak body down on the bench. he held her until she had nothing else to weep out. “let’s go home, love.”

several days later, and several shifts later, y/n had started to feel more normal. things had been looking up, but she was still dealing with the loss of her patients. it never would not bring her pain, each bruise would never heal, but she would rather not forget about them.

buck had taken her out of the house for a day, meeting up with everyone for dinner. they all had been supporting y/n in their own ways. spending time with her, listening to her, giving her advice, and just being there for her was the best they could do. they figured it would be good for her to spend time out of the firehouse and their small shared apartment.

her bubbly personality wasn’t back yet, as she still thought about the casualties consistently. they still haunted her dreams and lay in her brain. having buck there made everything easier. the way he cared for her and never judged her feelings had caused them appear more valid. having someone that understands you like that can open doors to new feelings so fast.

sitting around, they all talked for a bit as y/n still stayed quiet, her hand and bucks never unwinding. her grip on his soft hands has been still like they were stuck in cement. being able to listen to his voice and the casual meetings between everyone brought her back to reality.

“hi, sorry, excuse me?” a woman said, standing next to another one. she had a hearing aid in, and was doing sign language while making eye contact with y/n. “i had just recognized the whole team, and i remembered seeing you. i wish i could remember your name, but it must’ve gotten mixed up somewhere.” the lady signs, pointing at y/n. “you saved my life, you came right back into that building and i would not be here today. you saved me and my family. i wish i could give you all the world, but seeing your face still brings me comfort. so thank you, from the bottom of my heart.”

y/n was completely speechless. she had no idea what to say. her eyes were welling up again, but she blinked them back down and tried to force a few quiet words out. “of course, i’m so glad you remember me! that’s what i’m here for.”

her interpreter signs y/n’s words back to her, and she blows a quick kiss to y/n and walks away with a bright smile. y/n faces back around to buck, with a shocked smile on her face. it was bright, and it seemed like something that reminded her of all the good in this world that she has done.

buck knows that aside from a beautiful face, her soul had a wonderful outcome on the people around her. he wanted to give her everything and make her feeling like the most loved person on the planet. his admiration for her and complete head over heels mind brings him back to her hold every day, and he would spend the rest of his life being her hand to hold.

[ruporas]

apologies if you've already been asked this but do you have any favorite trigun fics? i absolutely adore your art btw!

thank you!!! and i've answered this on insta, but i don't think i've ever shared on tumblr... i'm not good at reading fics, esp long ones, because my attention span is pretty bad, but from the ones i have bookmarked, i'll share some that i like in no particular order

hills like white elephants (meet me halfway) - adlvnam

pairing: vashwood word count: 1.1k, sfw, vague post v.10 spoilers ‘I read a story once,’ Vash says, unsure. ‘I’m kind of thinking about it right now.’

i like a lot of adlvnam's fics, i find them very unique and creative in their execution, and their writing is wonderful! this was the first fic i've read from them and it's stuck with me ever since. others that i like from them are in manus tuas (no spoilers) and vox dei (warning for post vol.10 spoilers).

stay - Anonymous

pairing: vashwood word count: 2.3k, sfw, no spoilers “Hold up,” Vash groans. He presses his free hand to Wolfwood’s mouth and shushes him. He’s probably going for a stern look, though between his poor attempts to stop grinning like the biggest idiot this side of the planet and the way he’s patting him, it’s hard to take him seriously. “Stop laughin’. Where’s the keys?” “What keys?” Wolfwood tries to ask, muffled by Vash’s hand, and his tongue is a little thick and slow in his mouth so… something comes out, but it’s probably not very wordy. Word-like. Not a sentence, probably. (or, wolfwood and vash get drunk, bicker, and then share a bed together.)

i enjoyed the mundanity and silliness of this fic and i think about it from time to time... i think fics where one of them or both drink together are pleasant to read.

Last Summer - varilien

pairing: vashwood word count: 741, sfw, no spoilers You are what you love.

tags on this one are "sunrises, morning routines, coffee, sentimental" which caught my attention. very sweet and beautiful.

Rain - Kokohamstar

pairing: none, wolfwood centric word count: 768, sfw, major spoilers - post v.10 Ever since he was a little kid listening to Bible stories, he dreamed of the day the world would be washed clean and wondered what the rain would feel like on his face.

as most wolfwood centric fics, it was a gutpunch and melancholic, but still soooo.. augh.... the last paragraph really does it for me.

water bucket blues - fathomfive

pairing: vashwood word count: 3.7k, sfw, major spoilers, post trimax Vash the Stampede goes on the record about a friend he once had. Also about card games, cats, family, and some other things. "Start with a piece of the whole, Meryl said. It doesn’t have to be the first piece. Start with a specific. That’s what they mean when they throw around the words human interest. I know the pieces. Believing they make a whole is another thing. But she’s a broadcast professional and I trust her advice. Maybe if I can figure out how to tell one piece—like the story of Wolfwood as I knew him—I can learn how to tell the others."

i love vash pov fics and i love it when it's first person and this one in particular hits because it's his pov and he speaks, honestly, openly, telling a tale that he can't really flub because it's about the people he loved. i love how grounded this fic is in the present of max, i love how vash grows within the 3.7k words, i love how he moves forward with the world he's living in. this fic makes me teary if i think too much about it... it's really wonderful.

it’s a summer day, and I want to be wanted more than anything else in the world - goldenglitz

pairing: vashwood word count: 3.9k, nsfw, no spoilers Vash has the lung capacity of a man who’s cried for 150 years. It isn't like Wolfwood takes more than he gives — but like with most things, he barely keeps up with Vash. He works his body to the limit, even as his lungs burn and his legs and arms give out under him. They fuck like they’re on borrowed time. All of this makes it so easy — so much easier than just talking. Wolfwood would sometimes rather pull new and interesting noises from Vash with just his mouth than do anything else with it. Their own dialect: moans, groans, and four words. “Yes” — “Please” — “Vash” — “Wolfwood.”

i love all of their vashwood fics, they only have 3 but they're all lovely and has a sort of characterization to both vash and wolfwood i don't see often. definitely one of my faves, especially when it comes to explicit vw fics.

i think these are all the ones i'll share for now!!

[juniperss]

Little Sister Curtis Headcanons

these were inspired by this request and co-created with my pal @a-libra-writes!!

Libra and I came up with the name “Sunshine” because 1) it’s adorable and 2) you can’t tell me that’s not a name that Mom and Papa Curtis wouldn’t have had written down on the baby name list. Her brothers usually call her by her first name, but Sunny also works just fine.

Only about a year gap between Sunny and Ponyboy which places her at around 13 if we’re going based off the book’s events (while ignoring certain plot elements that make me sad, thank you)

Sunny is a bit more like Darry after their parents die; she tries to keep the house clean and take over her mom’s responsibilities. Because if Darry is gonna earn the money, maybe she can help this way. Her brothers worry that she’s growing up too fast and try to get her to take it easy (pots meet kettle!!!). 

Darry tries to take her out to the movies when she gets stressed out even if he falls asleep 10 minutes in. She doesn’t really mind that he dozes off, she’s used to it. It's the thought that counts. 

Soda has her come to work with him sometimes and help out on the cars. “Learn something!” as if she doesn’t learn enough at school. Comes home dirtied and tired of Soda and Steve, complains a bit but she's smiling.

Tags along with Ponyboy to anywhere he wants. They usually go for walks and talk about school and the gang. 

If Johnny is the “pet brother” for the Gang, Sunny is the pet sister and has an interesting relationship with the rest of the boys.

Two Bit is viewed as a “decent” brother figure and he at least knows how to act around a younger sister. Probably the most likely out of the group (next to her actual brothers) to look after Sunny like his own kid sister. There’s no antics you can get up to that surprise him anymore than he’s already used to. 

Steve is a pest to her and gets in the way of spending time with Soda. They have a small rivalry but it’s less tense then Steve and Pony’s relationship for sure. Sunny doesn’t tag along nearly as much so it kinda evens things out. 

Dally and Sunny…..are what I’d describe as a Tom and Jerry dynamic but who's Tom and who's Jerry is always changing. Mutual chaos and the source of that chaos switches depending on the day. Dally is on Sunny’s shit list because he made a comment about her cooking once. Which, to be fair to Dallas, the potatoes in the soup WERE NOT cooked through so he was right, but she still holds a little grudge. It doesn’t matter if he was the only person to actually eat all of it. She scolds Dally for putting his feet on the coffee table, he calls her a brat, she aims the football for the back of his head, he pulls on her hair and purposefully calls her by the wrong name. Laughs like a fiend when she yells “Dallas Winston im gonna knock your head right off!". But she also knows that Dallas would be the first person to knock someone’s teeth out if she needed him to. 

Johnny is her pal and she enjoys his company the most of the Gang. He’s a good escape from the rowdy bunch and he doesn’t cause nearly as much damage in the house as the rest, he helps with the dishes and he laughs at her jokes. She likes him and he likes her and they’ve got each other’s backs.

The Brothers are worried about raising a sister. I mean they know fundamentally that she needs what they do and that for the last 13 years they’ve been doing a good job of looking out for her, but all 3 of them are concerned that they’re not enough for Sunshine. Not only did she lose her parents, she lost her Mom and she doesn’t have anyone who can fill that spot. Mrs. Matthews helps when she can and she’s a lifesaver to Darry when he has questions, but he can’t shake the feeling that Sunshine was robbed of better and stuck with them. 

Darry goes a bit easier on Sunshine than he does with Ponyboy. Part of that is because Sunshine and him are more alike than the other two siblings, so they understand each other better. The other part is that Darry thinks Sunshine is already taking on too much responsibility by trying to replace their mom. 

Darry taught her how to fight when she was like 9 and she’s gotten into good scraps with the Gang, but Darry and the rest are adamant that she stay out of fights because she’s too little. Sunshine is all too ready to toss out that she’s only a year younger than Ponyboy! To which the rest of the boys say, “He’s a kid, you’re a baby”. This in fact does not stop her from fighting when she needs to but she does try her best to stay out of trouble for Darry, especially after their parent’s deaths. 

She loved so much. Darry doesn’t say it nearly as much as he knows he should (and that applies to all his siblings) but he goes out of his way to make sure Sunshine has something special just for herself once in a while. Soda routinely suggests getting her a haircut when he notices her messing with it or hears her one off comment about not feeling pretty or looking nice. Ponyboy tries his best to help her out around the house or with her homework. She knows they love her and she loves them. 

[greeniegreengreen]

Hi! Can I request gojo x falling in love with his booty call who's in denial that he loves her and she lives him?

A/N: First request on this account and I'm so happy about it!! Took a while to do because I had an assignment due last Sunday.

College Au - Gojo Satoru x Fem!Reader - FWB to Lovers

Warnings: Suggestive themes, Mentions of Alcohol/Tipsy Folks, MDNI & Ageless Blogs will be blocked

Word Count: 1809

I hope you enjoy @diavolosbaby!!

Wish me luck

Phone clutched in his hand as he stared back at the text. Deciding to not reply to it, he put his phone face first on his desk and redirected his attention to the lecturer.

He wasn't able to focus on what she was saying though. The message clouding his mind along with questions of his own.

She had told him about her crush on Nanami. He had encouraged her to pursue it. She had mentioned how their arrangement would have to come to an end if she wanted to proceed with a relationship. He had said he didn't mind.

So why did it bother him she was really going to ask him out?

Why did he harbour so much hate for himself for playing the supportive friend in this?

They were just friends that fucked. Heavy emphasis on friends. They weren't exclusive or getting to that point. So this shouldn't bother him that much.

His phone vibrates again and he's quick to pick up on the pattern. He had customized it a while back to make it easier to identify when she had sent him a message.

Not wasting a second he unlocks his phone and immediately regrets doing so.

guess who has a date this Friday~(˘▾˘~) you're gonna help me pick an outfit right

Heart dropping he tried to type back a reply. Of course Nanami would agree. In the little group they had it was very evident Nanami liked you back.

sure

He should be a lot more excited for you but for some reason he can't bring himself to it.

Maybe the loss of his daily fuck was what made this an issue for him?

It had to be. The only reasonable explanation there was in his head.

***

The end of class could not have come fast enough.

With the worry on his face as he packed his bag, Geto took notice.

"Didn't understand what Mrs Wagner was saying again?"

He paused his packing and looked up at his best friend.

"It's not that." He shoved his laptop in it's pocket and zipped up the bag. "I'm just thinking."

"About?" He watched his friend get up from his seat and toss the bag onto his back.

"Don't worry about it." he tried to get Geto off his case. "It's nothing serious."

Geto gave him a doubtful look but decided to let it go as they left the hall together.

Walking through the courtyard on their way to their apartment Geto's phone went off. He pulled it to see who had messaged him. Gojo not taking notice to it as he was stuck in his thoughts.

"Oh?" He voiced after reading the message. "Nanami got asked out by [Y/N]. Now that's a pair I didn't expect to happen."

He replied back to the text.

"They'll look cute together, no?" Looking to his right at Gojo who despite not being present before was fully aware of everything Geto was saying now. His clenched jaw an indication to that.

"I doubt." He disagreed.

"Why not?" He asked, curious to hear what Gojo would say.

"They just don't click." Like she and he did.

"They could. A relationship is all about learning about the other." he looked ahead as they were slowly approaching their building.

"Even so, they barely spent enough time together." Unlike they did.

"True. Haven't seen them have a conversation for longer than 10 mins" He looked at him thoughtfully. "I still think they could make it work."

"I highly doubt that." Gojo said with a roll of his eyes.

He may not have been looking at Geto but Geto was sure to take note of every little twitch that pulled his face. The slight furrow of his snowy eyebrows, the tick in his jaw. He wasn't happy about this news and it showed.

"By some chance," he started as they got in the elevator and Gojo pressed their floor. " Would you have a crush on [Y/N]?"

Gojo's head turned to look at his friend for the first time since they left the class. He tried to read his facial expression to see if it was a joke of a question he was being asked.

None. Geto was dead serious.

No one knew about the arrangement as per your request. So Gojo not wanting to anger you and continue what you had going kept his mouth shut. Not even his best friend got an inkling to what was going on. The secrecy of it all did make it more exciting.

But a crush?

On [Y/N]?

Impossible.

"No, I don't" He turned to look ahead of him as he exited the elevator.

Reaching their shared home, he pulled out the keys to unlock the door. Geto not far behind him.

"Well it looks to me that you're jealous." He said.

Stumbling with the lock at that statement, he got it in and opened the door.

Jealousy?

Is that what he was feeling?

"If you like her, now would probably be the best time to tell her. Nanami seemed awfully excited by the sound of his message." He set his bag by the couch and plopped down on it.

Gojo made a beeline to his room not wanting to hear any more of what his best friend had to say.

Upon entering he dropped his bag on the floor. Fell onto his bed face first face and laid like that for a bit.

"Okay okay waait." you slurred as you and Gojo sat on his bed with an open bottle of wine between you two that you shared swigs of.

The party going outside his room basically shook his door from how loud the music was being played. It was times like this that he was glad he and Geto agreed to moving into a Student Residential instead of a normal setting.

His fellow peers were too busy getting drunk, sleeping or minding their own business to care about another random party happening on a Saturday night.

"I never pegged you for the submissive type." you gave it some thought, or as much as your just above tipsy mind would allow.

Gojo grabbed the bottle between you two and chugged down a bit letting the sweet liquor take over his throat. "Well it'd mostly depend on the person in charge. I can't just submit to anybody ya know."

"So," you took the bottle from him and swung it back finishing it's contents, "If it were me?"

You got on your hands and knees and crawled the short distance between you two, making sure that once you got close enough to get on your knee in front of his sat body making him look up at you.

He brought his hands to your waist as his pupils dilated in the blue sea that were his eyes. You slowly caressed his smooth face with both your hands before moving one to his hair, pulling it back a little more till he was looking at you through his fair eye lashes.

"Well if it were you I don't think you'd be able to handle me right." he said, voice barely above a whisper but loud enough to hear over the music that thumped his door.

He moved his hands up and down your body feeling you up before slipping them under your shirt and gripping the skin that was there.

"is that a challenge pretty boy?" you started closing in on his lips.

"And what if it is?" he was visibly excited.

"Then I'm gonna have to take you up on it." your breathe fanned his lips before securing yours on his.

***

The day after you had found yourself in his bed naked in his arms. You may have drunken a lot but you sure as hell were not that drunk to forget everything that happened.

Getting out of the bed and looking for your clothes must've been what woke him up. He watched you in silence get dressed before deciding to make it known he was awake too.

"Morning." he greeted giving you a little jump.

"Oh, morning Gojo."

"Satoru."

"Oh, first name basis now?" you teased.

"I had you screaming it, I don't see why we'd have to revert back to my surname at this point."

He was right. If anything after last night's event, reverting back to how things were was going to be weird.

"So," you started trying to figure out how to word what you were about to ask while looking for your bottoms. "Friends?"

"Personally...I'd like to keep this going." he looked at you expectantly awaiting your response.

You paused your search to look at him. He was very much still in his birthday suit with his covers on his bottom half.

Would you like to go into an arrangement with the same man you had a what you define as a high school crush on?

Would it be a good idea?

Well, if you were least likely to end up in a relationship with him why not just have a little fun with this.

Fuck it.

"I'm up for it."

He gave you a lazy smile before getting up from his bed. You watched his sculpted body leave his covers and make his way towards you.

"What you want to pinky promise to this?" you let out a little laugh.

Arm snaking around your waist while the other went to cup your cheek.

"I was thinking of something a lot better."

That was about 4 months ago.

Nothing really changed from where you two stood as friends other than the fact you fell harder for Gojo each day while unknowing to Gojo himself he was in the same predicament.

Sure he enjoyed the sex but he enjoyed your company as well. Jus having you around to talk to or watch a movie or go on a random adventure or coffee shop hangouts or having study sessions together made his day.

He loved the way you laughed at his dumb jokes and the smile you gave him that you didn't really give to anyone else. He loved getting to cuddle you while watching a series you found together. He loved hearing about your latest interest and the excitement you held behind each word.

He loved...

He loved you.

He LOVED YOU.

He's a fucking idiot for not understanding that so soon. it was right in front of him.

But you liked someone else.

So what does it matter.

A lot. It matters a lot.

He got out his bed to grab his phone in his bag.

What was he doing?

Pulling up your chat obviously.

Was he going to confess his newly discovered love for you over text?

Why of course not.

He was going to invite you over. A lot needed to be discussed anyways.

come over? we need to talk

What did y'all think though? It'd be nice to get some feedback since I haven't written for quite some time now.

So um,,,this is gonna be getting more parts than this because I didn't reach the cutesy ending I wanted to. I also didn't want to make it too smutty since I wasn't sure if you'd like it but if you would like the stuff they do inbetween I can write those seperately!!

Will go through at a later stage to edit it.

[sunwarmed-ash]

🔥Sinful Sunday🔥

🎂Happy Birthday Gavin🎂

Rating:🔞 Explicit-sexual content🔥 Fandom:💙Detroit Become Human💙 Ships: Hankconvin900, Nines x Gavin x Hank x Connor Tags: Birthday sex, blow jobs, multiple orgasms, bukkake, Bottom Gavin, M/M/M/M, DBH polycule, PWP- plot what plot/porn without plot, Daddy kink, sir kink, degradation/humiliation kink, unsafe sex A/N: this took me all day, please give it some love🤝💙

Of all the places to be, on his least favorite day of the year, he has to be at phcking work, sitting through yet another PR meeting about ‘Accepting Androids in the workplace.’

The revolution last November changed the world, and now, 10 or so months later, things are just starting to balance back out. And that he thinks has more to do with two Androids in particular, who were able to reach Gavin in a way even Hank, his longtime friend and partner couldn't. 

He sure didn't make it easy. Gavin never makes anything easy. But they persisted. And now he’s moved back into Anderson's house, he’s work partners with Nines, and he, Nines, Connor, and Hank are in the weirdest, most unpredicted polycule he's ever been a part of. 

It's been great, at least the last couple of months have been. Like he said, he didn't make the transition easy. But once they found the key to getting Gavin to open up, everything just kinda spilled out. Then it was easier. Because the shit Gavin was actually mad about finally came out, and he learned Connor and Nines weren’t really that bad of dudes. Annoying, yeah, but hey, so was he.

They also helped introduce Gavin to some of the best sex he’s ever had. Turns out, having two high-stamina Androids as fuck buddies had its advantages. The pair opened him and Hank up to a world of new kink opportunities that had the additional side effect of bringing them all closer together as a result. Which he guesses is good too. He’s certainly happier than he’s been- 

Nines bumps his shoulder, and Gavin only notices now he’s drooling. He wipes his mouth quickly with the back of his hand before clearing his throat. No one in the large lecture hall outside of Nines caught the action, which Gavin was grateful for. His phone lit up with a silent message from the Android just a moment later. 

{Bored Gavin? Or daydreaming again?} 1:43 PM

Gavin chuckles quietly before slipping his phone under the table. They were all adult officers, looking at their phones wasn’t disallowed, but Gavin was trying to be polite with how much he was actively not paying attention. 

[I can think of at least 15 things I’d rather be doing with my time than this…] 1:44 PM

{This is a required seminar for all officers} 1:44 PM

[Yeah, I know, but it’s not like I’m gonna give Androids any trouble anymore.] 1:44 PM 

[Even if I tried, you’d kill me before I got half a sentence out.] 1:44 PM

Gavin sent the message and waited for Nines to read it. A growing warmth bloomed in his gut when the side of Nines' mouth turned up in amusement. 

{You're correct, I would.} 1:45 PM

Gavin assumes it would be left at that, and starts to try and pay attention. Until another message popped up. 

{Only a little bit longer now. We will be leaving for the day after this.} 1:47 PM

That surprised Gavin.

[As much as I’m pro ditching work, don’t think Fowler’s gonna go for it.] 1:47 PM

Nines' face remained stoic and emotionless, giving nothing away.  

{The request for PTO has been entered and accepted for months.} 1:48 PM

Gavin’s mouth dropped open. Because he sure as hell didn't put in the request. He prefers to work on his birthday. Helps him avoid thinking about it. About Cole. About everything. 

Nines sent another message. 

{Just because you refuse to acknowledge the day doesn’t mean it ceases to exist Gavin.} 1:48 PM

Gavin flushed red and flipped his phone over on the desk. He was done talking about this. He had purposely avoided telling Nines and Connor when it was for this reason. Though in hindsight, it was kind of stupid to think two supercomputers didn't have access to something as mundane as his birthday, but still. Hank knew how he felt about it. He’s made it crystal clear. 

He didn't say anything to Nines for the rest of the meeting. 

It was a quiet and un-phcking-comfortable 36 minutes. 

⭕

“GAVIN, WAIT!” Nines is shouting after him, but he doesn't want to talk about it. 

“I PHCKING HATE SUPRISE PARTIES,” he shouts back instead. He’s so edgy by the time he reaches his car he drops his keys twice, and Nines catches up to him… 

“Gavin, I know how you feel about your birthday-” Nines starts, but Gavin doesn't let him finish. 

Gavin acts before he considers all ramifications and grabs Nines by his jacket. He sees red. He shoves Nines until his back hits the four-door. 

“No! You don’t know shit,” he insists furiously. 

When Nines' face exposes genuine shock and his LED flashes red does Gavin remember that he's a mushy, mortal, sack of bones who just physically, stupidly, assaulted a top-of-the-line Police Bot. Who ya know, also happened to be his partner and nonconventional boyfriend. He should definitely let go. Why can’t he let go?

“Let go of me Gavin,” Nines insists calmly, LED back to a steady and less homicidal, cyan. 

Gavin does. Immediately grateful Nines chose mercy and both his wrists were still intact. He straightens his own clothes before unlocking his car. 

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“I’m not asking you to. Just, to keep an open mind. We have spent a fair bit of time setting this up for you.”

“Who’s we?”

Nines opens the passenger side and slides into the seat without answering. 

Gavin’s teeth clench but he yanks himself into the driver's seat. When he pulls on his seatbelt, Nines finally answers. 

“Connor, Hank, and I.”

That admission has a fair bit of Gavin’s anxiety melting off his shoulders and leveling out his temper. 

“Just you guys,” he clarifies as he turns the engine over. 

“Yes. Unless you want to extend the invite to others.”

Gavin shook his head. 

“Not really.” 

Gavin didn't trust anyone else like he trusted them. 

⭕

When they pull up to Hank’s house Sumo rushes out to greet them. 

“Hey buddy.” 

The comfort of Hank’s dog helps ease more of the discomfort Gavin is feeling as he walks up to unknowns in the house. Nines doesn't rush him inside, so he takes an extra minute, waiting until he can breathe without wheezing before heading inside. 

⭕

The rest of his anxious reservations melt upon opening the door. 

“O-Oh.”

“Yes,” Nines confirms. “I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you sooner. I was bound to secrecy. Connor threatened fratricide.”

“I did,” Connor smiles, sitting completely naked on the living room couch, with Hank between his legs. “Welcome home, Gavin.” 

“Phck me,” Gavin pants, because it's suddenly way too hot in here and he swears his jeans just shrank.

“That was the plan,” Nines confirms amusedly, and his hand finds Gavin’s low back. “Shall we join them?”

Gavin’s having trouble making his mouth form words so he nods. The drool is back in full force,  because there really is no prettier sight than a naked Hank Anderson, on his knees sucking cock. 

⭕

While Connor continues to use Hank’s throat, Nines is opening Gavin up on his fingers over the loveseat. It gets easier and quicker every time they do this, but it's becoming increasingly obvious to Gavin that Nines is taking his time on purpose tonight. 

“Please Sir,” Gavin asks, pushing his ass back against the long slender digits. He needs so much more than just two fingers inside him.  

“I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of hearing that,” Nines hums and it makes Gavin weak. 

“I’ll say whatever the phck you want as long as you don’t stop touching me.”

Nines rewards him with another slick finger, pumping gently in and out with the others. Gavin relaxes even further in the Android’s grasp.

“Why aren't you obedient like this more often? You’d get what you want faster.”

“It’s no fun being good all the time,” Gavin laughs, a little breathless from the sudden increase in speed. “Ask Connor.”

Connor looks up from Hank, who currently has all of Connor’s cock in his throat. The brunette grins and slips his hand into the older man’s silver hair, holding Hank’s face in place.  

“He’s right,” Connor shrugs. To emphasize his point, he pushes Hank down further, waiting until the last possible moment before pulling Hank back by his hair so he could breathe. 

The sputtering sound Hank made upon removal was gorgeous; wet, gasping, and needy as he tries to keep any part of Connor’s cock in his mouth while he takes some much-needed breaths. 

Gavin’s cock spits more fluid. It’s so phcking hot. They are so phcking hot. He could watch that shit on a loop forever. 

“I think that's enough Connor,” Nines says a moment later, and both Connor and Hank are up and moving without a fuss, walking towards the bedroom.

Gavin is confused why they aren't following. Nines pushes in another finger and twists them until Gavin squeaks, holding him right where he wants him as Gavin catches his breath. When he has, Nines takes his chin and kisses him, forcing the air right back out. 

Nines chuckles and the heat sends goosebumps rippling down Gavin’s right side. 

“Ready for the next part of your present?” 

Gavin groans. “Oh hell yes.” 

⭕

Four fingers are not enough of a stretch to fully ready himself for Hank’s monster cock, but with a lot of lube and stimulation pretty much everywhere else and Gavin’s too pleasantly distracted to notice any pain upon entry. 

Connor has his mouth and is kissing him filthily and with teeth while Nines has his hand around his cock, pumping Gavin closer and closer to the edge. That plastic bastard Nines knows how sensitive the skin around his piercings is, so his fingers stay there, playing with the slick mess of his tip and pushing his thumb across his piercings until Gavin cries. Hank’s own thrusts inside his body start slow, but every time one of the Androids pulls a ple2ased sound out of him, Hank’s next thrust is harder, deeper, or faster. Like they were competing to see who could get him to bust first. 

Nines’ fingers catch his piercings, tugging against the head and Gavin whines, desperate and needy. Connor’s tongue pushes deep into his throat, chasing the sound and Hank pulls Gavin’s hips flush against his own. The next two dozen snaps are pointed and so perfect they turn his legs to jelly. 

"Daddy-” he whimpers, resting his forehead against Connor’s while he attempts to catch his breath through the powerful thrusts. “Please."

Hank’s hand comes down on his ass cheek hard and the sound echoes perfectly off the walls. 

“Again,” Gavin groans. Hank delivers another slap as hard as the first one. Gavin’s cock spits more fluid into Nines’ hand. "Fuck, again." Gavin is sobbing. His prostate is under repeated abuse and every thrust of Hank’s cock is so much to take he feels delirious on pleasure. Connor swallows down his every moan, biting into his neck when he wants to hear him cry and Gavin loves the feeling of being strung out on them.  

"Getting close already baby," Hank chuckles knowingly and Gavin doesn’t have an ounce of energy left to feel shame. 

"Pleaaase," Gavin begs, because the ache in his core is driving him feral. He needs it. Nines has finally stopped touching his dick but it doesn't matter, he’s gonna cum no matter what. 

"Get up then, I don't think Nines or Connor can see how wet your cock is."

Gavin doesn't have time to think of a retort because he's being pulled up against Hank’s chest that next minute. The new position allows the final few inches to slip in and break Gavin's brain. 

"Ph-ck, oh god, yes, Daddy-” Gavin whimpers, quieter than a whisper. 

“There you go,” Hank praises before taking Gavin’s cock into his hand, “you boys see that?”  

"Sloppy mess, as per usual," Nines agrees and Gavin thrashes as that degradation sends a powerful wave of arousal down his spine.  

"He's absolutely gorgeous," Connor whispers. His eyes are still on Gavin, taking in every inch of his exposed and vulnerable form and making Gavin feel all kinds of ways. 

"Hear that Sweetheart?" Hank praises, and Gavin is too lust-drunk to do anything but feel and whine. 

"Can I- come on, please-"

"Yeah baby, go ahead, let us see you.”

Gavin whines as his long overdue orgasm punches out of him, rocketing his body down and then immediately away from the enormous cock inside him. It hurts to be full, but he doesn't want to be empty either. Where he stopped and where Hank’s holding him is perfect. 

Nines and Connor’s eyes haven’t left his cock which is pumping white all over his stomach and the carpet below. He wants to stay here forever. It aches in his balls just the way he likes. Relaxes his muscles and releases so much tension. Clears his mind, and makes him feel light, high, and floaty. 

Until Hank starts thrusting again and Gavin desperately needs a break. Just for a second. 

“Hank,” Gavin whines, because his prostate is so sensitive. 

“I got ya baby, don’t worry.” 

Hank pulls out slow, kissing down the back of Gavin’s neck because knows his body and his sounds better than anyone.

“Thank you,” he gasps, and he’s melting right back into that warm floaty place.  

“Course,” Hank chuckles warmly, “can’t break our fuck toy before the twins even get a full turn with ya.”

“Phck,” Gavin gasps, more cum dribbles out of the sensitive tip of his spent cock and he barely has the energy to moan. He wants it though. Even if it’ll wipe him out for the next two days, he wants it. 

Nines and Connor each return to his side. Connor hands him a glass of water and he’s so grateful he could cry. 

⭕

When they get back at it again, Hank elects to watch the next round from his armchair. Gavin is in the center of their Cali king mattress, naked on his knees with his arms behind his back. They’ve caged his cock, because Gavin doesn't want to cum again just yet. 

Nines and Connor are standing at the foot of the bed. They haven’t started touching him yet either, which is as agonizingly frustrating as it is intimidating. Probably because they just kept looking at him, obviously communicating telepathically because both of their LEDs were flashing. 

It’s been like this for a while, not even Hank is putting up a fuss about the lack of action. Gavin begins to wonder just how long they have been planning this. 

When something in Connor’s eyes changes and he flushes blue Gavin starts to squirm under the gaze. It moves the plug in his ass, lining it up a little better with his still-sensitive prostate. He moans before doing it again. 

Evidently, that's enough of a rule break to receive the wrath of Nines' glacial stare.

“Didn't say you could move slut. Flip over, onto your stomach. Now.”

Gavin tries to hold back his pleased grin as he does what Nines instructs. He didn't hate getting punished, it was so much better than not being touched at all. 

When Gavin is comfortable on his stomach, Nines grabs his hips and pulls him backward, until his legs fall over the edge of the mattress.  

“You’ll appreciate the angle better,” Nines explains and Gavin is sure he’s right. His fingers then move between Gavin’s ass cheeks, finding the plug and pulling it free. Some of Hank’s release came out with it and dripped down Gavin’s caged balls. Hank and Connor both gasped their appreciation.

“Phck,” Gavin pants and Nines chuckles before slipping two fingers inside him.  

“Feeling impatient?”

“What do you think?” Gavin sasses and Nines pulls his fingers out. Gavin is pushing back to try and follow them but Nines’ steel grip on his hip has him halted in place. Pleasure burns hot in his gut. “Please, Sir, please fuck me?”

“Yes. but I’m not gonna cum inside you.”

“What? Why not?” Gavin whined, surprising everyone but Nines. 

Nines spanks him hard, harder than Hank and it has Gavin bucking against the mattress just from sheer force. The sting that follows is blissful, and Gavin relaxes onto his chest. “‘Sorry Sir,” he hums and Nines smiles. Though he can't see it from this angle.

“Because I’m going to paint you with it instead.”

That has Gavin groaning along with the full-body shudder the suggestion caused. Evidently Hank had let the twins in on that particular kink of his. He’d be mad, if it didn't make him so phcking hot to imagine it. 

“Is that alright?” Nines asks and Gavin realizes he didn't speak.

“Phck yeah,” Gavin pants.

“Sir please…” Gavin begs again for who knows how many times now. Nines and Connor have been edging him for close to an hour now. His cock is still trapped in the cage and the floor below is puddling with Gavin’s precum. 

Nines and Connor’s matched assaults with their cocks paired with Hank’s filthy praises have brought him to the absolute edge but never over and it's killing him. Gavin’s been reduced to a shaking, whimpering, pathetic pile, just begging to be destroyed and they still won’t do it. 

“What was that Gavin? Did you say something?” Nines asks cheekily, pulling Gavin’s hips down, the tip of the android's cock pressed against Gavin’s prostate which throbs it's so sore now.  

“Sir, Connor, please.”

“What do you need Gavin?” Connor asks, voice so much gentler than his younger, meaner brothers. 

“Cum on me, and then let me cum for you. Please, I can’t take any more.”

“Hmm, I suppose you have suffered enough,” Nines chuckles. 

Connor’s hand leads Gavin’s mouth back onto his cock while Nines' hands are busy between Gavin’s legs. He hears the blissful sounds of the lock tumblers and then the cage is falling free. 

“Thank you, phck, thank you,” Gavin pulls off to gasp, because his dick is quickly filling, and Nines has him flipped over, back onto the center of the mattress. 

“Hank, did you still want to record this?” Connor asks Hank and Gavin feels another pull of arousal in his gut. 

“Better hurry,” Gavin warns and is rewarded with the first taste of Nines' orgasm on his tongue. It tasted like nothing, well not nothing, he tasted like flavorless, water-based lube. With every pump of Nines’ hand, Gavin is coated with a warm slick release. Every drop that landed on his cock has him bucking up, eager to cum. Too eager actually. “Phck,” Gavin pants, gripping the base of his cock to keep the orgasm back. Connor still had his turn to take after all. 

The brunette in question gained his attention now. He straddled Gavin and the detective was excited for the up close and personal view. 

“Pump it,” Connor orders and Gavin drops his own cock in favor of mono-focusing on Connors. He loves watching Connor cum. Loves how expressive his dumb, pretty face is when he’s toppling over the edge into oblivion. 

Connor’s eyebrows bunch together, signaling he is about to shoot and the words are falling out of Gavin’s mouth before he can stop them. 

“Mark your claim Con.”

Connor’s head falls back and his cock is still in Gavin’s hand. Cum is spurting across Gavin’s chest, under his chin, and pooling around the base of his cock, making everything so much wetter. Gavin is surprised he hasn’t cum yet. 

When Connor finally recovers from his orgasm, he’s moving. Not far, just enough to line up his hole with Gavin’s cock and sit on it.  

“Phck!” Gavin curses.

“Say my name, I love when you beg it,” Connor groans, tightening around his cock and rocking against him. 

Gavin chokes on his gasp, he thrusts into Connor hard. These androids drove him fuckin’ crazy.

“Connor,” he says, cock near bursting. 

“Yes Detective?” Connor chuckles, hot, wet, and secret in his ear and that's it. Gavin can’t hold back anymore. 

“Connor, phck, phck-” he’s cumming. Hard because he’s been edged for so damn long. Because each of them has thoroughly scratched each of his kinks. His hips thrust up against Connor’s ass as he rode out the waves of his orgasm. Connor pulled him forward until he could kiss him. Gavin kisses him back.

⭕

“So, how did you like your birthday gift?” Connor asked. 

Gavin turned to where the Android was currently curled up against him post-sex and smirked. Nines was on his opposite side. Hank was snoring behind Connor, his arm draped across the android's hip and hand interlocked with Gavin’s. Gavin didn't blame Hank for passing out, nor was he mad. He was seconds away from falling asleep himself. Gavin nods to answer Connor’s question.  

“Easily, best birthday I’ve ever had.”

Nines hums pleasantly whereas Connor smiles like Gavin hung the fucking moon. 

“Really?”

Gavin nods. 

“Yeah Tin Man, really.”

[kcalsforhim]

monday 25 november 2024 - 𐙚 ˚🍰 ⋆｡˚⊹❀˖°

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୧ ‧₊˚ 🍮 ⋅ ˚⊹

cals : ~900

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dinner : pokebowl with salad mix, cucumbers, carrots, edamame beans, avocado, chicken, spicy mayo dressing, nori seaweed seeds and sesame seeds.

dessert : teramisu cake but made out of biscoff lotus cookies... teehee

midnight overeating session / binge : 2 smoked salmon slices, a small serving of mashed potatos, half a cucumber, an apple, like 10 jelly straws, 3 pieces of candy...

୧ ‧₊˚ 🍮 ⋅ ˚⊹

aha guys remember when i said i would go into binge recovery ? haha i failed. anyway i didnt fail nearly as bad this time, and i did cut myself once for every thing i overate... i just dont undersrand why i keep doing this lol but oh well. i talked with eli about it on a deeper level and i really began to think about it ;; im infact still thinking about it... but generally ive come to the conclusion that i need to stop centralising food so much in my life since its all i can think of.. i also want to go back to omad, and generally only not omad when i feel SICKLY and just go from there. i generally always feel like if im omad'ing i restrict better, the only cases not being when i feel siiiick to my stomach.. but then again... every time i felt sick from restricting so much... it kind of felt amazing too.. im also thinking of feeding my friend, specifically the one close to me since haku has been dieting for a long time and i dont want to overfeed him. generally i think it would be a good idea since i can dispose of food and still keep him happy... i just... really should focus on getting rid of all food that is appealing out of my life as well as just seeing it as fuel... i want to stop indulging so much... thats easier said than done... ive done alot of reflecting and honestly so far in november there has not been a single day where i felt proud of how i did, in comparison to october where i felt like i did great 90% of the days... omad is definently a good starting point, learning to say no more often... in general, food does not run away from me if i dont eat it, even in my own house. i struggle more with sweets than i do with salty stuff, im so afraid of it running away... but i need to stop being afraid... food is not my friend.. i shouldnt like it or indulge in it so much, it damages my progress and the guilt i feel after lasts for days if not weeks now... i really wish i could take controll of myself again.. but. i will. not give up, thats the last thing i want to do. in the grand scheme of things, one month of wasted time is not the end of it, i can pick myself up and i can always fix things and get back on track, i just have to keep trying and pushing... even if its hard or im having my moments where it feels like restricting is literally impossible, i have to keep trying... over... and over... and over... and over... and over... so ive kind of concluded on a few things i want to do moving forward

i want to generally try to restrict as much as i can, this is hard for me, because i actually very much enjoy food, but food is not my friend. i will try to omad as much as i can or just skip meals as much as i can.

avoid fast food places as much as possible from now on, if not all together, fast food places are packed with calories... making at home versions are ok... but i actually felt terrible the last few times and it never felt satisfying ?

stop drinking so many liquid calories...

FOCUS ON PORTION SIZES, i cannot stress this enough, dont try to fit every single last cal into what you can eat... focus on plating a satisfying amount except for plating how much you can eat (with an exception to vegetables).

today i also went out with my friend.. that was fun.. he got me some stuff which is always nice

some body checks i took.. im not very proud of what i look like, i feel like i could look so much better if only i actually tried my best...

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here is some BEAUTIFULL photo's i found online... this is waaay rather what id look like... and i should work harder from now on to get to that point...

୧ ‧₊˚ 🍮 ⋅ ˚⊹

this song is nice and... kind of eery..

୧ ‧₊˚ 🍮 ⋅ ˚⊹

[jamiesfootball]

Answer the questions and tag five fanfiction authors you know!

Tagged by @asteria-argo and @altschmerzes

EDIT- I DEFINITELY TAGGED THE RIGHT PEOPLE THE FIRST TIME

1. How many fandoms have you written in?

24 going back to college, more before that. Unless you mean written in published, in which case 3

2. How many years have you been writing fanfiction?

I wrote my first thing at 10

3. Do you read or write more fanfiction?

Up until last year, read by far. But since I've started more focused writing I have woefully fallen behind on the reading. Right now I'm reading about 3 small fics / updated chapters a week.

4. What is one way you've improved as a writer?

Outlining comes a lot easier now than previously. That used to be the most intimidating part, but I've learned now how to keep myself in a trajectory. If there's truly something else I want to explore but that doesn't fit within the outline, then that can simply happen in another fic.

5. What's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

I have no semblance of weird any more. But I did read an entire book on foot injuries with absolutely gruesome photos of foot fungi infections.

6. What's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?

I love it when it feels like the person commenting resonated with something I wrote. It doesn't have to be long (though I do really love that), but a certain amount of passion behind the comment is always lovely to see.

7. What's the most fringe trope/topic you write about?

I'm currently rotating a time travel au of characters from a fic set in the future coming back to visit characters during the early seasons of the show. This one is fringe because only I would know what the fuck is going on with half the cast.

8. What is the hardest type of story for you to write?

You know how there is a sub-genre of fic where a character basically gets to have their day calling everyone else out on their behaviour about some canon-gripe? Those fics. I just can't do it. I can read them, but writing them always feels too mean. Also nihilism for the sake of nihilism. I think it's because in both scenarios, it would require curbing my inner need to fix whatever is going on.

9. What is the easiest type?

I! Like! Fixing! Things! In! A! Canon! Compliant! Way! Or at least, like, canon install-able. You can install canon into this and it won't break too bad.

10. Where do you do your writing? What platform? When?

Right now I'm still using Living Writer despite not liking it very much (for a variety of reasons) because while I meant to switch over, I got overwhelmed exporting everything and missed the renewal date. So stuck with that another year I guess. But the big thing for me is to have cloud and offline access, and this does that.

11. What is something you've been too nervous/intimidated to write, but would love to write one day?

I finally started outlining on of my original fiction projects! Huzzah! It's going to be longer than I thought help

12. What made you choose your username?

Dyslexia and a writing typo

I tried snooping around to see who got tagged already, but my dash was freaking long today. If you've not been tagged, consider yourself so, thanks!

[goldenteaset]

2023 Fic Writer Year In Review (Part 1)

These came from this ask post here, but I felt like answering them in chunks on my own, similar to what I did in 2022. I was a lot happier this year. :D

Answers 1-10 under the cut!

What’s something new that you tried in a fic this year? How did it turn out and would you do it again?

Messing with formatting and POV in "An Act of Husbandry" (Virche Evermore, Scien/Ceres)! I think it turned out great, thanks to the Despair Ending that inspired it having a lot to work with. I definitely want to try it again!

2. How many fics did you work on this year? (They don’t have to be finished or published!)

...I have no idea, actually. ^^; A lot? Let's go with that, yeah.

3. What’s something you learned about yourself as a writer?

Being honest with what I want to write makes the act of writing go so much easier. Also a lot of things I thought I'd never consider writing I absolutely would if given the right characters.

4. What piece of media inspired you the most?

A lot of media, not even ones that I wrote fic for! Cupid Parasite wound up being a huge inspiration just for how it handled the different "love types" in each route so effectively. Baldur's Gate 3 has helped me put into context how I want to write Legato in Ligature. Virche Evermore has made me adore visual novels as a medium more than ever. Anne Rice's books once again reminded me of why I write in the first place...I could go on. XD

5. What fandom(s) did you write for this year?

Alphabetically: Berserk, Death Note, Granblue Fantasy, Trigun ('98 and Stampede), Touken Ranbu, What in Hell is Bad?, and Virche Evermore.

6. What ship(s) captured your heart?

This was the year of Legato x A Good Chunk of Trigun's Cast, with special mention going to Legato x Vash, Legato x Meryl and Legato x Knives x Vash. Allan x Lynette from Cupid Parasite also occupied my thoughts a lot, but I didn't feel the need to write fic for them. ^^; Also, coming in at the end of the year: is that Scien x Ceres from Virtue Evermore with a steel chair?! Yes it is, and I've never been happier to be bludgeoned.

7. What character(s) captured your heart?

Legato waited 10+ years before setting up shop in my heart and I still don't know what happened. Later, Scien kicked down the door and Ceres apologized before also stepping in too.

...Also, I feel it's worth mentioning, but good lord was this ever Belial's year as well, even more so than the last five. Confound this man and his ability to make anything sexy as long as he's involved!!

8. Did you write for a new fandom or ship this year?

With the exception of Berserk, GBF and Touken Ranbu, they were all new this year! (And even GBF had new faces, like Lodi.) In general I let myself run wild.

9. What fic meant the most to you to write?

...Hmm. It says something that there are so many contenders this year, doesn't it? Every time I think I have an answer, two more options appear. In general, there were points where I really felt characters' emotions as I wrote, and I hope readers felt the same.

10. What fic made you feel the happiest to work on?

Again, a really hard question! XD But I do have an easy answer for that: Baby Princess Training Diary (GBF, Belial x Lyria and Belial x Lyria x Djeeta, rated E). It's a combo of being happy that I finally knew what I wanted out of it, and also just...I love Lyria so much and wanted her to have the best possible time, "even" in a kinky, dubcon story like this one. For whatever reason, she brings out Belial's most Dangerously-Caring Boyfriend Energy, and there are moments in this where I had to look away because they were so cute together! And adding Djeeta into the mix made it all the sweeter. It just wouldn't stop, even when it was time to edit. The fic itself isn't going to be to everyone's tastes, and I knew that, but still. It was just so fun...

[brendathedoodler]

Hiiii I love your adventure swap au! Currently obsessing over Hyrule with Time's adventures. I have so many questions! Does he resent the sword too? How does he cope with all the ✨️Trauma✨️? Thank you for reading this!

Hyrule doesn’t necessarily resent the Master Sword, but it feels heavy. It was a burden that was placed on him far too young, and he can’t help but view the sword as a representation of the things he was chosen to endure. When he learns about Fi from Wild and Sky, he feels a bit guilty for how he views the sword, but tries to assure himself that it’s not that he dislikes Fi, it’s that he dislikes the thing her blade represents. (Maybe he wishes that Fi had been awake during his journey. Maybe if she had, he wouldn’t have felt so alone.)

Adding a cut here because it gets more into Hyrule’s trauma and how he copes. Nothing too serious or graphic, but it is a little heavy

Hyrule is at a particularly tough time in his life. He’s 17, right at the age he woke up at. He’d been sent back to live his childhood, yes, but he still remembers what it was like to be 10 years old in a 17 year old’s body. He distinctly remembers how wrong and unnatural it felt to simply exist in a nearly adult body, and even though he’s now grown into it naturally, he still clearly remembers a time when it had felt wrong, and those feelings linger like phantom sensations.

He doesn’t really know how to deal with it. He does what he can, doing his best to assure himself that this too shall pass (even if a part of his mind whispers doubts. He’d lived through a time where it wouldn’t pass, after all. Can he truly be sure it won’t happen again?). He doesn’t know how to combat the feeling of wrongness, so he just tries to do other things to help soothe it. He wears his favorite clothes frequently so that the comforting texture and shape won’t make him feel any worse, he does his best to keep his hands busy with his instruments even when he’s not playing, and if he gets too overwhelmed with it he shifts into his fairy form for a break. It’s always felt more natural than his Hylian form, after all.

When he was younger and got dragged into the war of eras, he expressed a lot of the complicated feelings he was going through by causing trouble. The Fierce Deity mask had seared marks onto his face and stolen the color from his eyes. Others found him creepy, and he leaned into it heavily. Getting a reaction out of adults was incredibly fun, but it also made it easier to handle the sort of rejection he was often facing. If he intentionally acted weird and creepy and found amusement in it, then it wouldn’t hurt so much when other people found him weird and creepy.

Meeting Time, Sky, and Wind’s Grandma during the war across eras was a huge help. Wind’s Grandma acted as both a comforting and an authority figure, Sky quickly got used to his antics and became a sort of older brother figure, and Time was the first kid his age that he didn’t feel completely disconnected with. Saying goodbye to them was difficult, but they all left lasting impacts on him and helped him start finding ways to cope with his struggles on his own.

Now that he’s reunited with some of them and met other heroes like him, he tries to figure out how they cope. He’s basically taking notes on how all of them cope, especially Time. Hyrule really starts looking up to time, especially after seeing him grow into someone who healed. If Time can do it, then so can he. It gives him hope that this rough time really will get better.

He struggles to sleep without playing a particular magic song to soothe himself (but even then it doesn’t work on the full moon). He struggles to find a balance between comforting solitude and being lonely, even among a group of people he considers brothers. He struggles with emotions he can’t put a name to and feelings he doesn’t know what to do with.

Despite these struggles, he’s not alone. He’s doing alright, and even if he often feels lost, uncertain, or just plain wrong, he’s working hard to help himself and heal.

[anki-of-beleriand]

Bad Liar

Summary: Life is about lessons, and Wanda has been learning some harsh facts that had define her life and taken her to a place in which she was given a second chance. Then, all of a sudden, she meets you, and she realizes why it's easier to lie to yourself than to accpet what's right in front of her.

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff/ Female!reader - America/Kate - Mentions of past Vision/Wanda - past Natasha/Reader - Some Female!Reader/Carol Danvers

Warnings: Slow burn - Enemies to friends to lovers - Mentions of abusive relationships - Toxic relationships - angst - drama - mentions of abuse - more tags as the story progress.

Author's note: I'm back, and I'm ready to continue with my stories and start a new one. This particular story was something I was curious about, and as you will see it is a very AU story in which I'm trying to reach for a happy ending. I hope you guys like it and please don't forget to comment or like or reblog! I'm also open to hear your advices and requests, so...onto the story!

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 - Chapter 11 - Chapter 12 - Chapter 13 - Chapter 14 - Chapter 15 - Chapter 16 - Chapter 17 - Chapter 18

Chapter 1 - Running away

It was raining outside.

The winter had been especially impossible that year, and if she were to be honest that year had been an impossible odyssey for her. Her eyesight became a blurry confusion, and she hated the overwhelming pressure on her chest spreading out to her body and mind. Her neck pulsated with the memory of a hand applying harsh pressure until it was difficult to breath, her arms and chest burnt with the memory of heavy pounding while the screams and cries of children filled her mind.

The flashback made her close her eyes tightly, her hand clenched around the wheel just as her lips parted to let out a breathy sob. She opened her eyes to look at her reflection, a couple of blinks helped her focus her attention on the two children sleeping in the back seat. Her body didn’t lose the tension when she felt the mobile gleaming, a familiar sound announcing an oncoming message tearing her attention from her children to the offending item.

She furrowed her brows, trembling hands grabbing the device, only to let out a relief sigh at the sight of Natasha’s name on the screen.

Everything is set up; I leave the key under the pot right beside the front door. Please, tell me when you get there.

She read the message twice before letting out a sigh, relief filled her body when she realized soon, she would be under a warm roof and would be ready to start anew. Her eyes went back to the led lights from the supermarket sign, she gave the twins one last glance and before she could doubt it any longer, she got out of the car.

The wind and the rain were terrible that afternoon, and even though she had parked closer to the door by the time she got there she was already soaked. With another sigh, she grabbed the shopping cart and went to grab the things she would need for the weekend.

*****

You clenched your fist closed whole glaring at the different dairy products on the fridge.

Your day couldn’t have been worse, even if you tried. Life had not been fair to you in the last couple of weeks, the recent break up as well as the problems back at work were finally getting back at you. Life had been spiralling out of control as of late, and you felt as if the world had conspired to make it impossible for you to reach happiness.

With a huff, you grabbed the milk and the cheese America loved so much. Your eyes then drifted to the last sample of your favourite yogurt, your lips tugged upwards just as you stretched out your hand to grab it another hand stretched at the same time. Neither one of you hesitated and your hands found themselves almost intertwined as they hovered over the yogurt.

Your head tilted slightly so you could focus on the offending hand, your mood and patience running thin not ready to give in and be the better person. Not with your food. Your comfort food, by the way.

However, you never expected the other person to be a beautiful woman that was looking as if she just swam her way to the supermarket.

“I’m sorry, I just…” the woman started with a soft voice, it was kind of obvious she was tired and trying to get the upper hand.

In another moment, in another circumstance you would give in. Not that day, though.

“Don’t worry, better luck next time.” You offered a half smile before snatching the yogurt right under the other woman’s hand.

You didn’t stay to see her expression, or to hear her complaints. You smiled with satisfaction, the yogurt safely tucked in your cart just as you continued with shopping; your mind going over the other things you and America would need for the weekend and the following week. The incident would have been forgotten if it wasn’t because of what happened ten minutes later. You were ready to leave, everything you needed safely tuck inside the cart while you take the last aisle when your phone went off.

The message was quite clear, you rolled your eyes knowing you would get hell if you didn’t take the mac & cheese America was asking for. With a sigh you went back a couple of aisles, before setting your eyes on the price.

It was then and there you and her found each other again.

This time around you had the time to take a good look at the woman, it was pretty obvious she was annoyed and with her hair and clothes still dripping from the pouring rain outside. Her clear eyes, of a green you almost lost over in, gleaming with resentment as they settled on yours. For some reason you couldn’t help but smile, it was stupid but the sight of your smile made the other woman flustered and settle her eyes on the pasta section.

With a shake of your head you leaned in grabbing the last box of America’s favourite brand of Mac and Cheese.

“That’s mine.” The other woman couldn’t contain herself; she shot you an angered stare with disbelief gleaming in her green eyes. “I was about to grab it.”

You raised a brow glancing from the box to the woman.

“Funny, I didn’t know your name was Annie.” You replied with a voice filled with sarcasm, “suck it up, lady. Your just too late.”

Wanda clenched her jaw shut, she was tired, cold and miserable at the moment and the last thing she wanted was to fight with some random bitch in a supermarket. She took a deep breath and decided to change tactics.

“My children…they love that…”

You furrowed your brows, “again, you’re too late. You’re not the only one with child-like tastes. Good luck next time.”

Wanda stood there watching you left with a self-satisfied smirk on your face, and your heart heavy with regret.

The house was completely silent.

The lights were off, and Wanda could smell the indistinctively aroma of cleaning liquid and air-freshener. The house itself had been completely tied up and the only thing it was lacking were the very same articles she had bought in the supermarket. The young woman huffed, the memory of what she just experienced in that place made her blood boiled.

“Momma.” Tommy rubbed his eyes sleepily, a huge yawn left his, mouth while his lip pulled up a pout. “I’m hungry.”

Wanda put Billy on the sofa, putting his hair away before turning to Tommy with a tired smile.

“I know, baby, let us go and make something nice before your brother wakes up.” She whispered to a now enthusiastic Tommy.

Both of them made their way to the kitchen, the lights finally letting her see the place she had bought with what little money she could get before leaving her home back in Westview. The place had been neatly decorated, and everything seemed to be either new or cared for. Wanda sat Tommy on the counter before putting the pots and the groceries out of the bags.

“How about some pasta?” She asked to the boy who merely nodded with a smile watching as his mom started working around the kitchen.

It didn’t take long for her to get used to the kitchen, she walked around grabbing the things she needed it while also making mental notes of what else she needed to buy the next day. Tommy watched her with big, brown eyes and a tranquillity she knew the child had not felt before; unconsciously her eyes went to the clock on the wall and Tommy did just the same.

Wanda swallowed down her fear, her eyes drifting to Tommy who tensed all of a sudden turning around to fixate his stare on the living room.

This time around Wanda knew no one would come in from the front door screaming drunkenly or coming over to hurt her or the boys. A minute passed, Wanda noticed how her whole body tensed and her hand grabbed the spoon hard until her knuckles became white. Tommy turned to Wanda chewing on his lower lip.

“Is daddy coming?”

Wanda swallowed down her fears and tears, she approached her child putting his hair back while shaking her head.

“No, baby, not today.” The relief in his face and his posture was everything Wanda needed to know she had made the right decision.

She leaned in kissing Tommy’s forehead before leaning back, her smile just as tentative and weak as the one Tommy was wearing. Wanda wiped away the tears she didn’t realise were falling before wriggling her eyebrows at Tommy.

“How about we finished dinner, go for your brother and watch a movie before eating some ice cream?”

Tommy cheered up allowing Wanda to put him down, the both of them soon were fixing everything in the kitchen until Billy came from the living room rubbing his eyes. Never before had Wanda felt more relief than at that very moment, watching as her five-year old children helped her around the kitchen always relaxed and happy like they had never been before.

Dinner went by and by the time midnight came in Tommy and Billy were snuggled against Wanda sleeping peacefully. The movie was still playing on the TV, Wanda had her arms around her children while her phone kept on flashing messages of unwanted nature. Her heart was at her throat, her eyes wide open in fear while her breathing caught on her chest.

She had forgotten to change her phone.

It was supposed to happen once she received the last message from Natasha but she had been so distracted by what had happened and the incident in the supermarket she forgot. Trembling she tore her eyes away from the device, her eyes falling on the sleeping form of her children putting them closer to herself.

Everything she had done; she had done so for them.

For herself.

She clenched her eyes shut, taking a deep breath while counting to ten.

He could not get to her anymore.

She had run away, and he didn’t know where she was.

She had escaped.

And now, a new life was waiting for her.

That was all she needed it at the moment.

With that last thought, Wanda fell asleep. The mobile forgotten, and the messages filled with rage and revenge flashing over and over for more than two hours until, all of a sudden, they stopped.

[techav]

Extra Thinky Bits

Ever since I built my 68000 computer, I've used a BASIC Mandelbrot rendering program I got from RosettaCode as a test benchmark. On the 6MHz 68000 it took nearly 10 minutes to run. With the 68030 running at 56MHz using a 32-bit data bus with L1 cache enabled, the same BASIC program completed in around 14 seconds.

But we can do better. EhBASIC is written in assembly to use 32-bit single-precision floating point numbers internally, but all of its mathematical routines use the CPU's integer ALU. There are large sections of code that could theoretically be replaced by single instructions for the 68882 floating point math coprocessor (FPU).

Adding the FPU is where I stopped on my original wire-wrapped prototype. I simply never could get it working reliably. I've since learned that I had some logic errors that were probably causing more trouble than my chosen method of prototyping. But this meant it was probably best to start over, and if I'm starting over, a custom PCB with a CPLD to handle logic & timing would be much easier, much more flexible, and much more reliable.

Another tumblr user, Avics1967, had pointed out that logic error to me a while back. It turns out the 68882 FPU is picky about the setup time relationship between the FPU's Chip Select signal and the CPU's Address Strobe signal. Basically, the Chip Select signal can't be transitioning at the same time that the Address Strobe signal is falling, and there's a few nanoseconds on either side of that AS# transition where the CS# signal must be stable. My original design didn't take this into account.

This setup time target ended up being harder to hit than I anticipated. With my little system running at 40MHz, there is just 12.5ns between the CPU asserting the address bus and the CPU asserting its Address Strobe. I need to allow about 3ns for the FPU Chip Select signal to be stable before AS# falls.

I'm using a 10ns CPLD for logic.

My first draft for the logic also did not meet timing requirements, and with my bus speed and parts on hand it never would. Luckily, the 68882 also supports what Motorola called "Late Chip Select", where the CS# signal could be asserted after AS#. So that's what I ended up doing — I implement a delay synchronous to the CPU clock to assert CS# half a clock after AS#.

I ran into an interesting problem while testing though. I assembled a short program to add 2+3 and store the result in memory where I could check if the result of 5 was stored properly. What I got instead was an endless chain of bus errors. If I hit reset quickly enough I could see the very first error was actually an Address Error, and then came the endless chain of Bus Errors.

This made no sense. The FPU can generate some exceptions, like the Coprocessor Protocol Violation I had gotten with my last prototype. And if there was a problem with my logic, a Bus Error might be thrown if the FPU wasn't detected or didn't respond in time. But an Address Error?

Turns out the FPU wasn't the problem at all. There was a typo — a single missing # — in my monitor which caused the CPU to try to load an odd instruction as a pointer instead of the actual pointer to the exception handler routine. So something was indeed causing an exception, but I couldn't see what the exception actually was because it was immediately followed by an Address Error which also spawned a Bus Error.

Thankfully, my exception table is in RAM, so I was able to patch it live before running my test program. And the next time I tried testing the FPU? It worked!

I have no idea what was causing the initial exception, but the FPU has been working for me since.

Now it's time to write some more sophisticated programs to really test the FPU, and maybe modify BASIC to use the FPU instead of its built-in arithmetic functions.

[mechanics-of-life]

Language learning January update:

Current priorities -

1) Mandarin (basic fluency, HSK 5)

2) ASL (work through Lingvano app)

3) Toki Pona (learn all 137 words)

4) Hebrew / Arabic (relearn/learn alphabet)

5) Gaelic (start learning again, if I have time)

6) French (work through Duolingo I guess)

Mandarin -

Previous info: Been slowly learning for the last few years (uhh I think it's been like 5 years or so). I know probably around 3000 characters, but I still feel like I don't even have basic fluency somehow.

Goal: Basic fluency by the end of the year, confidence with all HSK 4 and HSK 5 words and grammar structures. Even though my current reading level is closer to the 拼音 books I have, I want to slowly work through the novel I have.

Progress: Trying to read a few pages of a 拼音 book every day, and so far with the novel I'm about 5 sentences in, with 20 new words added to my vocabulary list.

ASL (sign language) -

Previous info: started learning around October last year, working through the Lingvano app. Had a pretty good streak going for awhile but broke the streak and lost motivation sometime in December. Trying to get back into it. I probably know around 300 signs.

Goal: Work through the Lingvano app by the end of the year.

Toki Pona -

Previous info: I know 10 words...

Goals: Learn all the 137 words by the end of the year.

Greek, Gaelic, Latin, French -

Previous info: Greek - tried learning a few years ago, maybe learned about 30 words. Gaelic - started learning 2 years ago, maybe had about 50 words or so. Latin - didn't get far at all, maybe a few words. French - learned it in school up till grade 12, but I've forgotten so much; don't really have the motivation to get back into it, but I really should.

Goals: I guess these are all on hold for now, unless I get my life more organized. Greek probably won't become a priority again for awhile, Latin certainly won't be a priority for a long while unfortunately, but I hope I can get into Gaelic again later in the year if I find some time. French is definitely something I should get back into, ASAP, but the motivation is just not there for it.

Hebrew -

Previous info: I'm a scholar and a weirdo so I wanna work through the original version of the bible and all its biblical hebrew. Learning the language seems "easier" than struggling with just looking the whole thing up word by word. I didn’t get very far, I guess I sort of know the alphabet and probably around 5 words.

Goal: uhhh idk, do better.

Arabic (Egyptian dialect) -

Previous info: just started learning, still trying to work on recognizing the alphabet.

Goal: I want to be able to learn the alphabet and pronunciation by the end of the year. Duolingo can't really help so it's gonna be an uphill battle for this.

Misc -

I guess my other priorities down the line would be Sanskrit and Italian. Sanskrit cause why not, and Italian cause I want to read through the original Dante's Inferno