#it would be fun to try and guess for other people too. cus I don’t know a whole lot of fandoms hdhshsvsb

[peapod20001]

WAIT. can u tell what fandoms and things I was really into by my art style ?? 😳

[thewispsings]

Heloo can I request a smau where the reader and lando are dating and they always do date nights but its not really a date night cus oscar is always with them everytime lily isnt there and he just becomes their child 😭 thank you thank youu

just us, and your friend steve | lando norris

pairing: lando norris x reader

summary: at first you were annoyed by oscar being at all of your dates, until you started to miss him when he wasn’t.

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 572,016 others!

yourusername: date night with my boyfriend <3…and his boyfriend!

view comments below!

user1: oscar the certified 3rd wheel

user2: that picture is so cute

landonorris: i love you :)

yourusername: haha simp

landonorris: oscar give my girlfriend her phone back

yourusername: fine 😒

yourusername: i love you too lan :D

landonorris: there she is!

user3: man i would KILL to be a third wheel in this relationship

user4: i would be landos boyfriend 😏

user5: is lando oscar’s only friend??

landonorris: yes!

oscarpiastri: it’s not nice to lie lando

landonorris: im not lying?

oscarpiastri: i have other friends!

landonorris: oh…then why don’t you go hangout with them instead of 3rd wheeling with me and my girlfriend?

oscarpiastri: …

landonorris: that’s what i thought!

yourusername: that was not nice lando.

landonorris: it wasn’t meant to be nice, it was the truth!

yourusername: still, it was mean.

oscarpiastri; yeah lando. it was MEAN.

landonorris: don’t gang up on me??

user6: LMAOO they hang out for one night and they become like this 🤞

user7: i need more of this trio

danielricciardo: and why wasn���t i invited?

maxverstappen1: i have the same question?

landonorris: because you guys have other friends! for osc it’s just me and yn

oscarpiastri; I HAVE OTHER FRIENDS.

landonorris: shhh, shhh, shhh baby it’s okay. it’s okay.

yourusername: baby 🤨

landonorris: omg it just slipped out

user8: that’s…interesting!

user9: yn and lando are so cute together

user9: and oscar cute too ig?

user10: you guess?? that man is gorgeous

user11: the “…and his boyfriend” is TOOO funny. yn i love you

user12: she’s seriously so funny

user13: how can people hate her?

user14: they’re most definitely just jealous

maxverstappen1: oh but when i want to make a heart shaped pizza with you it’s weird?

landonorris: yes!

maxverstappen1: double standard much?

landonorris: she’s my GIRLFRIEND

maxverstappen1: AND WHAT AM I?

user15: i feel like im interrupting something

yourusername: how do you think i feel…

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 528,058 others!

yourusername: paddle and golf with my baby <3 and my baby 🥹

view comments below!

landonorris: why does he get the cool picture and i get that?

yourusername: i think both pictures summarize you guys perfectly!

landonorris: so he’s cool while i’m a loser?

yourusername: i didn’t say that but…

landonorris: WOW, already favoriting the child. i can’t believe this.

yourusername: my child will ALWAYS come first.

oscarpiastri: :D

user16: we went from “my bfs bf” to “my child 🥹”

user17: WE DID IT GUYS

user18: yn and lando adopting oscar agenda is HAPPENING

charle_leclerc: are you trying to steal my child from me?

yourusername: it’s not really stealing if he willingly comes with…

charles_leclerc: it’s just stockholm syndrome, don’t worry oscar i’ll get you away from them soon

oscarpiastri: im actually having lots of fun :)

charles_leclerc: OMG WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM

user19: we got lando and yn adopting oscar…but we lost this during

user20: totally worth it

danielricciardo: when is it my time to be adopted?

maxverstappen1: you are a 35 year old grown man.

danielricciardo: 😐

user21: why is max coming for daniel??

maxverstappen1: i’m bored. since APPARENTLY i’m not landos paddle partner anymore

landonorris: max…i can explain…

maxverstappen1: save it. don’t call me. don’t come by my house. we’re done.

landonorris: i see you watched diary of a wimpy kid

maxverstappen1: i did indeed..

user24: they’re at it again…

user22: max is so funny

user23: i love him

user24: oscar being so quite during all of his is so him coded

user25: he’s just enjoying being out and about

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 601,958 others!

yourusername: vacation with the boyfie <3

view comments below!

user26: omg lando looks so good

user26: i’m going into heat

user26: WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF

user26: GRRRR

user27: this is the first post in 2 months that doesn’t have oscar…

user28: and the crowd…cry’s?

user29; i can’t be the only one who thought oscar would 100% go with them on vacation

user30: i definitely thought so too!

user31: they’ve literally spend all their extra time together

maxverstappen1: how many times did he belly flop?

yourusername: i’ve been swore to secrecy.

user32: she’s so lucky

user33: right? ‘the boyfie’ IMAGINE BEING ABLE TO CALL LANDO NORRIS YOUR BF??

charles_leclerc: guess who’s with me right now 😏

landonorris: charles…don’t.

charles_leclerc: hehehe

yourusername: you’re just his rebound. you’ll never be me.

charles_leclerc: @/oscarpiatsri what do you think?

oscarpiastri: i still like yn better

charles_leclerc: i bought you ice cream…

oscarpiatri: you could never be her 🤷

yourusername; IM COMING HOME FOR YOU OSCAR

landonorris: see what you did charles?

maxverstappen1: how are you holding up?

yourusername: i feel like my hearts been ripped out of my chest. i have no reason to wake up.

maxverstappen1: oh!

user34: max was NOT expecting that answer

user35: if oscar doesn’t get himself over to that damn island soon istg

user36: THATS HER BOY 💔💔💔

oscarpiastri: did you find any crabs? :D

yourusername: yes. i will put them in my suitcase and take them with me to show you

user37: so this is crazy!

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris, and 713,046 others!

yourusername: look who joined us!! my son <3

view comments below!

user38: THEY REUNITED!!!

maxverstappen1: how did she take it? 🤣

landonorris: she cried.

yourusername: i did not!

landonorris: yeah baby you did…

oscarpiastri: yn you know how much i hate agreeing with lando, but yes you did cry

yourusername: I MISSED MY SON, GOD FORBID I CRY??

user39: i get you yn. i really do

user40: omg this is so cute

user41: truly adorable

oscarpiastri: now i can see all the crabs in person :D

yourusername; THATS MY SON EVERYONE

charles_leclerc: he was mine first 🥲

yourusername: #getoverit??

landonorris; can’t believe you cried when you saw him

yourusername: i was EMOTIONAL

landonorris: in the four years we’ve been dating you have never cried when seeing me

yourusername: i see you all the time! no need to cry!

landonorris: i want you to cry! cry for me!

oscarpiastri: you could never be me ;)

landonorris: i will send you back to australia

yourusername: if you send him back, i’m going with him

landonorris: WOW.

user42: we have officially entered the era where yn is choosing oscar over lando

user43: her son > her boyfriend

danielricciardo: does this mean i can hop on a plane and go visit you

landonorris: NO. this is officially a family vacation.

danielricciardo: and i’m not family? 💔

yourusername: you’re that one uncle that you see twice a year and don’t talk to or interact with for the rest of said year.

danielricciardo; yeah that makes sense.

. . .

notes; thank you for requesting!! hope you enjoyed :)

[tokiwarcube]

Whether reader is a fan or works with Dethklok in some way, if they were trying to keep a relationship a secret from the public and even the other band members (at least for a month or so) who do you think would be the best and worst member of Dethklok at sneaking around with reader? Like for secret makeout sessions and dates, or sneaking in and out of rooms at night and in the morning, etc; whose the one whose only gonna make it a couple hours cus they can't keep a pokerface with you in the same room as them vs the whole month, and everyone is actually shocked they never noticed?

This was such a blast to work on -- took this one with me to noodle at on my trip, and finished finally finished up back home! Enjoy!

+ Charles as well, because I said so <3

1.) Charles

Charles is such an obvious choice for the number one spot here — while his eyes do get notably soft around you, there are certain… benefits to working with five, easily distracted dumbasses. If you two already work together, then really, there isn’t much to worry about.

But if you don’t? Well, that becomes a little bit harder. If they get even the inkling that you two are something more — even if its as some offhanded joke — they’re never going to let it go. They probably won’t blabber about the two of you to the media, but that’s really only because they don’t do media.

But truly, Charles’ composure is like no other: you could be perched pretty on his lap in his office, and the second he hears footsteps you’ll be back in your own seat — and no matter how frazzled you are, his calm is always enough to sway curious minds.

10/10, no notes.

Pickles the Drummer

Pickles is a bit of a mixed bag, but overall, he’s pretty good at keeping your relationship under wraps! You two have such a good dynamic within your relationship, with such an even back and forth of playfulness that really, it’s hard for outsiders to actually distinguish it from his usual banter. He pokes so much fun at you, and vice versa, that it never really seems like you’re getting special treatment in front of the guys.

And believe me, he loves getting a bit handsy just as much as the next guy. Or… maybe a bit more. But he can keep it in his pants until you’re behind closed doors… and a casual hug here and there can easily be blamed on the alcohol. He’s pretty good at redirecting the guys when they start prodding a bit too much into what exactly you guys are to one another.

The biggest risk to y’all getting exposed, however, is his jealous streak. It doesn’t take too much to set him off, and the spiral he goes on is a bit too deep to be considered an entirely platonic reaction.

8/10, surprisingly good at the game, but falls apart quickly under certain circumstances.

Skwisgaar Skwigelf

His ranking here might be controversial, but I think if you already work together, or are at least spend time together regularly, he’s capable of keeping your relationship a secret for a good while — and only partially because of his reputation.

You two were likely friends long before you entered a relationship, so from the guys’ point of view, its not unusual for him to perk up when you enter the room. And even before you started dating, he was a bit of a flirt. As such, he has a good bit of leeway in public, or even around the boys with that! I mean, he’s Skwisgaar Skwigelf — of course he’s eyefucking you at the dinner table. Of course he’s flirting with you, leaning into your space, and calling you all these pretty names. It’d be weirder if he stopped doing all of that, honestly. The biggest red flag is when he stops bringing people back, though. Now that really catches people’s attention, and makes them start second guessing what you guys really are to one another.

Being a fan complicates things a bit more, though. As I’ve said time and time again, relationships are exceedingly rare for Skwisgaar, and so having to keep the only real one he’s ever had a complete secret is really hard for him! Because as a fan, he can’t really bring you around all the time, or flirt too heavy in public without raising a few brows. This all becomes especially hard once he starts getting acclimated to your sweeter, more innocent touches. He just wants to be close to you, and he can’t really do that in public.

7/10, benefits from how slow-burn you were, but fumbles it with his newfound desire for emotional intimacy.

William Murderface

Honestly, I think he would take a bit of offense to keeping the relationship a secret. You’ve gotta have a pretty good reason for it to keep it from hurting his feelings.

Once you get him through that, he actually has quite a bit of fun with it! But… he is painfully obvious in his affections, contrary to what he thinks. He has a lot of trouble spewing his average level of vitriol at you once he comes to terms with the depth of his affections, and there’s not a single person on earth who couldn’t pick up on that change. When you’ve built your career — and really, your life — on being a dick, even the smallest bit of softness stands out like a flare in the night. It might take people a little bit to pick apart his actual affection for you from the intermittent flattery he throws at people, but once it’s pinpointed, it’s pretty damn hard to miss.

He also lacks some situational awareness… by which I mean when you’re making out, his entire world narrows onto you. So if there’s even a microscopic chance that you could be walked in on, it’s up to you to be the aware one.

And while he can sneak you in and out of his room decently… he isn’t exactly subtle the morning after. He might as well lean back with a smoke in his hand, at this rate… no, wait— that’s exactly what he does. Like Toki, his primary saving grace falls back onto how the band and media just… refuse to take him seriously. Poor man.

5/10, but through little effort of his own.

Toki Wartooth

Listen, Toki is about as subtle as a brick through the window. He doesn’t really get your reasoning behind the secrecy in the first place, but to his credit, he will try for your sake… however, its still painfully obvious that you’re not exactly platonic. He’s liable to let some sweet pet-names slip, and while he’s fairly touchy with friends, he absolutely clings to you more than most.

He is, however, alarmingly good at sneaking around with you. And he’s gotten damn-good at stealing kisses in the microcosm of time where you aren’t being watched — if anything, this becomes his own game to see how much he can get away with before you two get caught.

His one saving grace is that his bandmates (and the media) don’t really take him seriously. He could be planning your wedding on live TV, complete with finances and documents, and a single refutation on your end could dispel every single accusation lobbied at the two of you.

4/10, but only through sheer luck.

Nathan Explosion

Listen: Nathan thinks he’s fantastic at hiding a relationship… but Nathan in love is a completely different person. It’s painfully obvious that he’s got something for you, and frankly, the guys were already suspicious when he was still in the crushing stage. He’s softer around you, he actually listens to your opinions and what you have to say… and once you start dating, you’ll notice how his hands trail after you a bit when you leave the room, too. He’ll deny the accusations when his bandmates start prodding, but of course, they see through him pretty damn fast. He’s down abysmal for you.

Not to mention, it’s also borderline impossible to miss him in a hallway, Mr. Frankenfeet, so sneaking in and out of his room always has to be a solo endeavor.

And well, he doesn’t really think before speaking… or punching, for that matter — so if one person starts talking shit about you, the cat will be pretty much out of the bag.

2/10, for effort.

[luffyvace]

Her brook Idk if your req are closed so read this at your convenience 🙏

I wanted to ask for a male harpy reader strawhat hc or if not just hc with luffy, more specifically based off a bird with heavy feathers like a snowy owl cause I’d love to imagine that he complains about the heat a lot and wonders why he’s sweating more then usual but it’s just luffy hugging his legs cus he’s so soft

Love your work brook 🙏☺️

nope! Still open lovely anon<3

when I tell you I did NOT know what a harpy was 🤦‍♀️ I had to do research for accuracy 😅😋

but don’t worry it’s all good I’ll be more than happy to do your request!

I’m telling you right here right now luffy would most definitely be interested in a reader like this!! You know how many unique animals and such he tried to recruit into the crew that weren’t even human?? 😂💗

and thank you!! I’m so happy you enjoy my headcanons :) that makes me very happy!

Okay I’m just saying…….like chopper…if you look more animal than human….his first thought is to eat you

”you think he tastes good?” 😋

😭😭

IT JUST IS !!

moving on…♡

He thinks your wings are really cool

I mean a 6.5 ft wing span…….I do too!!

definitely wanted to measure them to check after he learned that

to which he got himself wrapped up in the measuring tape

Both you and luffy eat “strange” animals

such as sloths, monkeys, porcupines, squirrels, opossums, armadillo’s, anteaters and sometimes parrots…..other birds too 😋🍴

No animal is safe 😭

every island you go to the two of you immediately start scouting for whatever variety of yummy foods you could find

”I’ve got news for you two—normal people don’t eat those animals”

- Nami ♡

it taste absolutely delicious to you!!

honestly you probably got Luffy into eating them

which so funny because he already loves eating all types of weird things

which is probably why he was so easy to convince him to eat it too

like he would normally see a monkey and go oh cool a monkey!

but now….😈😈

not all the time tho

mostly when he’s hungry

……….so I guess I lied, yes all the time 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️

he saw you eating a armadillo with some sloth on the side and was like

oooo I gotta try that 🤪🤪

you might dislike for cats seeing as though a harpy’s predator is a jaguar

Least baby harpy’s anyway…

still! 😠

it’s good for you that the sunny is big once y’all upgrade from merry

it has plenty of rooms with shade for you, since a harpy’s natural habitat is rainforests

and they mainly stay in the shade anyway :)

franky probably had a room built that simulates a rainforest for your comfort 💕

like how he simulated the grass

once Luffy found out harpy’s are rare to find and you found the tori tori no mi - model: harpy- it was pretty much settled for you to join the crew :)

like he loves rare stuff!

it’s like treasure!

and you know darn well a pirate will fight for his treasure! 😼

you use your high pitch bird call to reunite the strawhats whenever you guys get separated (which is like- every time you go on an adventure 😀 besides the point-)

it’s loud enough and ranges far enough to the point where it’s more efficient than yelling

very much so comes in handy when your in danger too

also not to mention luffy is 100% gonna wanna fly on your back since you have wings

he probably won’t even ask

he’ll just rocket onto your back while your flying one day and refuse to get off cuz it’s fun

it likely ends with him spotting something cool, telling you to go over to it and getting you two into trouble

just be ready for the

😬😁 ✊😠 💥💥 😖😓

sequence again

flying also comes in handy when saving the strawhat’s BUTT!

You and Robin like 🦅🦅

LOLLL

but no fr you literally just swoop in and save the day 🦸

SUPERRRRRRR M/N!! *super man pose* better yet *franky pose*

Zoro will also appreciate it if you catch him while falling because I swear that man is always getting smacked around-

same with Nami 🧡

another time

Robin was stating facts about harpy’s when the strawhats first met you, and you were confirming

she mentioned that they typically lived 35-45 years (but she was talking about the ANIMAL.)

Luffy—of course—mistook this

“WHAAAT?! YOU MEAN TO TELL ME OUR NEW NAKAMA’S GONNA DIE SOON?!”

*Nami steps in*

”CALM DOWN IDIOT THATS NOT WHAT SHE SAID!!” 💥💥

“……..and besides..! M/n’s not an animal! He’s still a person you know?! Sheesh…..of course he’s gonna live the lifespan of a human”

Sanji will of course cook any animal of your request into your meal

if it’s more nutritious for you—then certainly he’ll do so!

he always prioritizes nutritional value in his meals, and thats different for everybody!

Luffy however….he will get annoyed with 😂

”GO AWAY STUPID *kicks across room* YOU DONT NEED THIS TO SURVIVE! THIS IS FOR M/N!”

your like one of the few men in his life Sanji doesn’t hate

okay I know that was more harpy facts related so now I’ll get into the scenario you mentioned 😅💗

Luffy uses you for warmth in the winter (all the strawhats do)

like chopper ;P

especially with your large and soft wings

”M/n…spread your wings out..we need your warmth..”

-Zoro

you’ve been complaining about the heat all day

You felt like you were ON FIRE.

like seriously?! What was gon on today?!

it’s not like birds need to shed……so why are you burning up!??

”mmmm…your so warm M/n!”

”LUFFY?!”

”shishishishishi!”

”no wonder I felt heavier than usual!! Get off me Luffy!”

”awwhhhh WHYYYYYY?”

”what?! Why?! Because I’m burning up! I already have all these feathers! You’ve got to get off of me Luffy!”

*whines* “but mmmmm/nnnnnn! Your so waaaarrrrm!”

*sighs and face palms* *attempts to pry him off*

“noooooo m/nnnnnn! I don’t waaaaanna get ooofff!!”

Luffy practically had you in a literal choke hold

he was not about to let you go.

and you know he’s got himself wrapped alllllll the way around 😂😂

once again thank you for the compliment my dear!!

Hopefully I did your hcs justice and that you enjoyed them! <3

[kagebros]

people who dislike you personally?

I saw your post then the callout about you selling traced art, if the criticism is valid you should address it before the con. How much of the stuff in your merch is traced? I wasn’t going to say anything because I really love the charity zines, but then I saw someone post on discord that I’m looking forward to meeting at TFcon talk about how insulted they felt looking at one of the prints they brought from you. Honestly I see where they’re coming from. It’s remarkably immature to try and minimize what you’ve done just because you dislike who the criticism came from. Or they dislike you?

it feels so manipulative? No one made you trace that Optimus, or the Shockwave… TWICE. You chose to do that. Then instead of taking accountability or actually drawing something based on the image as reference, you chose to try and cover it up when someone noticed by just… tracing more.

Do you really think that little of your customers? Tracing again when you got caught isn’t something you can blame on anyone else but yourself. It doesn’t matter if the people who called you out are kinda weird, they are right and you shouldn’t hide from what you did just so you can sell more traced merch. I’ve got one of them blocked because their art makes me uncomfortable, but it doesn’t make them wrong about this.

It’s immature to try and turn artists warning customers about bad things you did into another reason to hide from it yourself. Honestly who would like someone who traces things for art trades??

It feels like you’re blaming them so you can avoid admitting what you did until after you have a chance to offload your traced merch on fans who don’t know any better.

Do some reflection on what got you to the point where you thought what you’ve been doing is okay, if you justified trying to hide tracing by tracing again to yourself… you’ve probably justified a lot of other manipulative things to yourself too.

Step up, do better, the people who joined your zines deserve better than this.

You're right. I'll be addressing it later today. The only reason I had mentioned that this was by people who disliked me earlier is because this group in particular has targeted me in the past and the pattern was obvious to me at least. I wasn't going to say anything about it in the post and still won't be saying anything about cus again, like you said, it'd be detracting and deflecting from what's important.

I understand your concerns and anger regarding it all and hear you which is why I'll be making the post today since I have the time. The only reason I had wanted to do it after not was to deceive others into buying my merch but because I wanted to have fun over the weekend as this has been something I was looking forward to. But I see that it'd be better to address it now rather than lose the trust of more people.

That being said. I'm guessing you are someone who has interacted with me in the past or has spoken to me and I encourage you to DM me so we can discuss this. Some of the things you've said in this are either surface level or you don't have the whole picture at all which is understandable given how I've been trying to handle this privately more than publicly.

I'm unsure where you got the tracing for art trades portion from unless you were being rhetorical.

[starmanbyler]

very important question ANY GCSE ADVICE i'm starting my gcse courses and i'm acc panicking sooo do u have any revision advice or anything!!!

and a fun question!! if u could be any animal for a day what would u be

ILY HAVE A GOOD DAY /p

HII RUBI I CAN TOTALLY SORT OF HELP??

first advice, don’t panic too much yet. or at all. i was freaked out when i started doing my gcses, but for now all you need to do is focus in lessons and if there are things you don’t understand, don’t be afraid to ask questions or look stuff up so that you aren’t left behind, because trust me, being confused about certain topics when everyone understands can be very frustrating. so if you need to do some extra revision to work on weak topics, that’s cool, but you will be fine if you don’t. at least take note of your weak points so you can focus on them later, because you’re saving yourself some unnecessary time. id suggest having a little notebook for that kind of thing.

if you want to revise this year (i’m assuming year 10) then i’d suggest maybe half an hour to an hour per subject in a week. and btw i did NOT revise at this point at all. i did revise for physics towards the end of the school year (like march-may) because i had a gcse a year early. but unless you’re really behind and stuck then just do the best you can and only intervene if you notice there are things you don’t understand, because again, this will really help in the long run.

i’ll be honest i didn’t start revising for the rest of my gcses until april this year. most of them i revised the night before. not to brag but then got 98877776666 😭 so in some cases you will do alright even with little revision. but you know yourself better than i do. look at how you do currently in exams and whether you struggle a lot without doing revision or not. some people tend to naturally be better at taking in and memorising content, but others need to work a bit more to solidify it which is totally okay and very normal. so if you do struggle then you should try and revise properly for the actual exams. start out just revising when you have specific topic exams throughout the year. revise for like a week before (cus these aren’t that important) and focus FIRST on your weak topics. that’s the key thing. don’t skim through easy stuff just cus it’s easy. it won’t help you much and is just a waste of time. you need to be honest with yourself and really try to improve the parts that are holding you back. try out different revision techniques every so often or when you have exams to see what works for you. i can’t give many specifics since i don’t know how to revise but there are a lot of resources and ideas online. some that worked for me are:

flashcards (i used quizlet over and over to memorise case studies and vocab)

free science lessons is a GOD

also mr salles is good for english! there is a little community on youtube of english teachers that i found helpful (and i’m doing a level now so hey i guess they worked) also just youtube in general is good for a lot of things, revision advice, actual specification content + explanation and whatever you want to find

if you play around with these now (and anything else you find useful) then you can be more prepared for actual exams.

when it comes to mocks (y10 and y11) they aren’t as important as people act like. unless there is a sudden awful outbreak of covid and they have to cancel exams (which is unlikely in a year or two), your mock results don’t have much effect. they may make you feel bad (i can promise you mine did) but even just a little bit of revision can make a difference come may of year eleven. from february mocks to gcses, i went from a 5 to a 7 in biology, and a 5 to an 8 in geography. i didn’t revise at all for mocks, and i did a day or two last minute for my gcses. i’m not saying that’s a good idea… but what i’m saying is that a little goes a long way. so don’t panic if you don’t get the results you want in mocks. i do suggest revising for mocks, to practice revising and so you have a better understanding for real gcses, mine is sort of a cautionary tale that just happens to have a happy ending. but if you don’t because you’re tired or struggling, don’t beat yourself up about it like i did, because it just makes you mad at yourself and it doesn’t help you motivate yourself. use this as fuel to try harder for the real exams.

id say for actual gcses, start properly revising in the january of year eleven. january is mainly mock revision, but after mocks, you can focus more on the right topics from march-may. and make sure to continue revising before each exam. it can work to just go over your weaknesses over and over again until it’s basically branded on your brain. even if you forget these the second you walk out of the exam, you will still succeed. especially with right-wrong answer kind of subjects (maths, science and maybe geography) gcses are 1% inspiration, 19% motivation and 80% memorisation. that’s probablt an exaggeration, but my point is, it’s okay if you don’t really have the capacity to fully comprehend every concept, just memorise things so you can regurgitate it into your exams. no harm done really. it’s only important to fully understand the subjects you plan to continue onto a level and beyond.

i knoww this is mostly year eleven focused so it might not be as relevant now but trust me the main point is do not stress right now. you are safe so don’t freak yourself out. it’s good to try and get ahead if you have the motivation, but now is your time to have fun and relax before all the academic pressure piles up. not slacking off, but just don’t worry! especially when it’s just september. you don’t need to start immediately, just try things out and work your way up to a system that works well for you!

and out of interest, what gcses did you choose? (besides the obvious maths english etc) and does ur school make you do religious studies?

and good luck of course!! i sincerely hope you do really well and you deserve it :) just work hard and do your best really.

also, if i was an animal for a day it would not be any bug cus i’m dead. if i had a human brain maybe so i wouldn’t act like an idiot and annoy people. or a dog because they’re chill. and cats can climb shit so maybe cat.

anywayssss love you i hope you have the best time at gcse cus i’ll be real with you i wish i could go back sometimes. sixth form is super interesting but way less worry free; so save your worrying for later!!

can’t believe i just put a lana gif in a post. lmao

[viksalos]

ok anyway i’m gonna draft this cus this might just be me getting mad about a thing that is very specific to me idk

basically i saw a post (and it really doesn’t matter who wrote it cus it’s more than a year old now and it didn’t even break 300 notes) which was making fun of people for claiming to have religious trauma when OP assumed they hadn’t been to X amount of catholic services. this by itself is a bit silly bc catholics gatekeeping religious trauma as being exclusive to them is obviously myopic, but one of the tags was like “you don’t have religious trauma you have ptsd from familial abuse that used religion against you” and im like. i fail to see how that’s not religious trauma?

like i’ve said before on this blog, my religious education was primarily reform jewish via my mom with smatterings of various christian denominations mostly via my dad; you could not measure any amount of “christian religious trauma” i have by continuous service attendance but like yeah my experience of christianity is still primarily one of punishment, alienation, antisemitism, supersessionism. and like sure, my dad is a dipshit who never stuck with anything for very long including going to any one church, so no that trauma does not include X hours of christian education or whatever. but boy oh boy did he still like weaponizing our “christian heritage” when i exhibited any proximity to judaism!

and i also feel like *part of* my difficulty with christianity is specifically not knowing what the fuck christians are talking about when they talk about concepts that are seemingly basic to them and having to piece it together after the fact from the random smattering of things i *do* know. and these concepts are just woven in the fabric of US society; everyone seems to understand them instinctively but me! or like i’ll be talking with my (ex-)christian friends about our various bad run-ins with christianity and then it’ll be my turn to talk and they’ll look at me like i have three heads because they can’t conceive of religious trauma that’s specifically centered around christian antisemitism. or i’ll be talking with my jewish friends and because *they* had a more rigorous or conservative jewish education, i won’t fit in with them either--and this too can be partially due to religious trauma on their part!

i guess the other thing too is, this post was kind of in keeping with a different post i saw about protestants appropriating catholic iconography when trying to make art about *their* religious trauma. and on the one hand it’s funny to me that we’re supposed to care about the trappings of a colonial institution being appropriated, on the other hand it’s funny as an outside observer cus i do think the iconography they listed as examples are more alike between catholicism and protestantism than they are different. like i remember some of the examples were stained glass and gothic churches (protestants also have those; i live in a city with many protestant gothic churches) and multi-eyed and winged angels (those are described in the tanakh; they are not exclusive to either of you).

and like maybe it’s corny but i do think they have become kind of signaling things for people with religious trauma to find each other and talk about their experiences. are these particular symbols necessarily 100% authentic to everyone’s experience? probably not, but 1.) they make cool art, and 2.) the looming and foreboding nature of some of these symbols (i’m thinking of the exteriors of gothic churches especially) can be evocative of the sense of alienation one feels when you’ve definitively decided you no longer want anything to do with the church, but it’s still ever present. imo these types are mad because they want exclusive use of the cool art symbolism more than they want to facilitate community. if you wanted to say that art symbolism is not a solid basis for a community, THAT would be an argument i’d respect, but that’s not what y’all said.

[mica949]

Beginnings of Toppat Android!Charles

Henry didn’t know when their ‘arch nemesis’ relationship had turned into something like a game. 

It happened all on its own. It had become practically routine at this point: Henry would capture Charles, who would eventually find some way to escape, and then Charles would capture Henry, who had the power of retries and Toppat engineered gadgets at his disposal. In the meantime came many encounters which, at some point, started being fun. Ellie agreed with him on that regard, and also agreed that Reginald would find him crazy if he ever shared that fact. It all sort of melted over the last time Henry was captured, and pointed a shrink ray at Charles, who had only laughed.

“Honestly, Henry, I don’t expect to ever catch you for good. But, this is kind of fun, huh?”

It was. He had fired the gun at Charles’s headphones, which made him let out a noise of offense as Henry made his escape. 

Now was just another part of their game. He had Charles in some fancy magnetic cuffs, and the man was trying to exercise by seeing how far he could pull them apart. Henry had already given a little speech on how he was going to take down the US government, and it had been about 30 minutes without a sincere escape attempt. Honestly, it was kind of concerning. 

Henry snapped his fingers a couple times to get Charles’s attention, then signed, [Aren’t you going to do something?] 

Charles shrugged. “Sorry man, normally I’d do some witty banter and all that while waiting for my backup, but I’m kinda out of it today. Haven’t gotten any sleep in a couple days, some mission trying to stop you guys or something… I fell asleep during the debriefing.”

Was that normal for the military? Probably. There was a reason he’d double crossed them. He didn’t have enough fingers to count the horrible things he’d heard from members who ended up in Galeforce’s custody. 

[I won’t kill you if you want to rest.] He signed after a couple seconds of thinking about it. Not that he’d kill him anyways, he was pretty sure that the both of them were aware that getting blood on their hands wouldn’t do any good. However, the slight smile that bloomed Charles’s face made his stomach twist in a weird way.

“Thanks, I guess.” Charles moved his magnetic cuffs to a more comfortable position, then laid down. “You know… You guys aren’t actually all that bad. I mean, you steal stuff, and kill people who get in your way, but you’re mostly just… silly.”

Despite the truth to that statement, he couldn’t help but take a bit of offense. Henry made a particularly grumpy expression at Charles, who laughed and closed his eyes. 

“Don’t deny it. You wear a black trench coat and prepare evil monologues for me. Your girlfriend Ellie couldn’t stop making the interrogators laugh” Henry’s cheeks reddened, despite the fact that they were indeed dating. 

Apparently Ellie had a routine planned for when she was captured for information. Her stories of derailing her torture with puns made Henry feel a bit better as the doctors were patching her up. 

He snapped his fingers again so Charles would open his eyes before signing, [Would you believe me if I told you she practiced the jokes?]

“Honestly, I would. It seems like something you guys would do.” The soft smile Charles had fell, which made Henry’s stomach do another uncomfortable backflip. “I honestly felt kinda bad that they did that to her. She’s pretty cool, you know? You guys don’t deserve half the hell we give you.”

Henry tilted his head. What was this leading to? He’d never heard something like appreciation from the other, besides sarcastically in their ‘witty banter’. 

Charles seemed to take the hint, and sighed. “I don’t know. Just ranting, I guess. I’m tired. It’s been 27 years, and I'm finally realizing that we kinda suck. Or maybe I’m just grumpy cus I haven’t slept.”

[They should let you sleep, too.]

“Ehh, I’m used to it. When there’s a big mission going on, it’s pretty normal to pull all-nighters and skip meals.”

[We don’t do that.]

“You don’t?” Charles looked away from Henry, furrowing his eyebrows. “…Huh. Guess that’s another point you guys have on us.”

It wasn’t about points. Henry didn’t know why he suddenly cared. Charles was his enemy after all, even if they mostly just messed around instead of genuinely trying to hurt each other. Though, if he thought about it, maybe he could kill two birds with one stone. Get Charles out of his hair, and get him in a better place as well. It didn’t mean anything. 

[Why don’t you leave?] 

Charles chuckled, but there was no happiness in it. “Well… I’ve told you already, I’m a government android.” He knew that. An initiative that created robots to fight wars, or something. It sounded like the beginnings of a dystopian story. But Charles didn’t seem like the type to overthrow humanity. Charles seemed to realize it wasn’t clicking, and continued. “I don’t have an ID, birth certificate, or even a social security number. Even if I didn’t have a tracker built into my head, where am I supposed to go?”

Henry had an idea. A stupid, stupid idea. He knew it was stupid, but he couldn’t stop himself from thinking, what if everything could be perfect. In this timeline he had everything. Almost everything. Everything except…

[You could come with us.]

“Oh man, can you imagine? Me, a Toppat? The general would be so mad. Where would my hat even go, on top of my headphones?”

He wasn’t taking it seriously. Henry probably should have seen that coming. [You could. I would vouch for you.]

“As if you’d ever accept me. I’m better off hoping they’ll let me retire when I hit my 50s.” 

“Charles.” 

Henry rarely ever spoke. His voice failed him at the worst of times in the past, so he stuck to sign language unless absolutely necessary. He couldn’t remember if he had ever spoken to Charles with his real voice. Maybe he hadn’t, if that bewildered expression said anything. 

“You’re uh… really serious, huh?” Charles smiled, but there was something Henry couldn’t read in his eyes. “I… don’t know. It sounds nice, doing whatever I want whenever I want with nobody to tell me no. But I’m not a criminal. I can’t just… I dunno…”  he was silent for a moment. “…It really does sound nice.”

Henry shrugged. The brief courage to talk had left him all at once. He switched back to signing to say, [Think about it.]

Charles didn’t have a response to that.

[radfae]

how did you find out you were autistic? i’m pretty sure i am but like. have no clue about getting a screening/diagnosis esp cus i have christian parents that very much believe none of that stuff exists and prayer will fix everything, etc etc

this is a little long lol sorry

mostly online research and just my own experiences with like. the world and how i grew up compared to other kids i guess if that makes sense. i already knew i was neurodivergent (adhd) and there’s a lot of overlap with it so for a long while i wrote off a lot of my autistic symptoms as adhd ones, but i knew i was different and had other issues from people i knew that just had adhd. like growing up i struggled w motor skills (couldn’t use scissors properly for a long while, ran differently from other kids and got made fun of for it, etc) and had a really hard time socializing so i attempted to make up for it by ‘copying’ other kids (masking; i literally would study how and when other kids would react to things and mimic how they do it because it doesn’t really come naturally to me. i try not to as much anymore because it’s exhausting but i find myself doing it subconsciously because i picked it up at such a young age). after a while i talked to a couple online friends about it who were basically like ‘yeah this definitely sounds like autism and not adhd’. i then kinda branched out and asked my irl friend about it who said yeah i’ve thought about it for a while and it does seem like you have it. asked my therapist and she said she’d picked up on symptoms throughout our sessions and she agrees she thinks i have it. asked my mom, she said she’d suspected it for a while but never brought it up because she didn’t want a label w stigma to negatively impact me. i still don’t have an official diagnosis on paper because my mom doesn’t want me to get one and i have other issues with bad anxiety that make it difficult for me to do things on my own, but i do want to pursue getting one when i can. but despite the absence of that like i said i’ve pretty much had my symptoms confirmed by everyone in my life (the only person close to me i talked to about it and said she didn’t get it was my sister), including a professional (therapist). though autism presents differently in girls and it can be kind of difficult to get a diagnosis off of that alone; my psychiatrist straight up told me that even though i had symptoms, he didn’t think i had it because i understand how to mask and i seem like a ‘nice young girl’. in the US it can also be expensive if you don’t have insurance, and you can get put on a long waiting list. there’s really just. a lot of hurdles to go through and honestly not everyone even wants to seek a diagnosis because of it, and that’s fine too. you could do the same thing i did and just do intensive research and ask friends if they’ve noticed anything? i’m happy to talk about this further if you need anything else as well

[leejenowrld]

oh u and ur bf’s story is so cute!!! i envy that so much bc (i think im younger than u? im guessing HAHA) ive had a couple of relationships and even though they were serious, or at my age, serious enough that i believe id know what being in love feels like, maybe my frontal lobe has properly developed yet but i do feel myself getting bored after 9-10 months and i admire how u and ur bf have been tgt for 7 years!

how do u guys keep the relationship alive and not boring? i find that to be a reoccuring theme in my relationships :(

stay safe/healthy and have a great day/night!! thank u for responding to my ask 🩷

thank you <3 that means so much :( and tbh i’m not old at all! i turned 21 in august, he’s turning 22 in november so we’re super young lol. we just got together very very young. and that’s so interesting yk like out of all my friends i would say i’m the only one in a stable relationship? i don’t mean to boast but like i’ve noticed the people around me aren’t really into the committed, “settled down” life and me and my bf are just like ??? we love it 😭 i couldn’t imagine fucking around like some of our friends do. like my friends are always surprised that we are still as interested in each other as we used to be which really isn’t difficult like i am obsessed with him. i feel like being in a relationship for so long has shown me what love truly is and what it should feel like and it’s made me more mature. i mean… as mature as i can be lmao it’s difficult to keep my chill when girls are trying to hook up and get with my boyfriend knowing he has a girl (me) like my boyfriend is a lot more “popular” and well known than me, he plays football, he has a lot of friends, he’s very social and outgoing (opposite to me honestly we couldn’t be more different) and he’s definitely a party person and all of these things make girls think it’s acceptable to try and fuck him. not joking. it’s like i don’t exist. the amount of anger i get over this 😭 but i have the best bf ever i will always love and respect how he deals with it <3

i think an easy way to keep the relationship awake and alive is to not have so many expectations! like obviously bare minimum expectations are a thing but like in general i mean. not everything has to be perfect, it can feel perfect which is a very different thing. also independence and time away is a good thing, i have my own friends, he has his, we’ve both gone on holidays with our own people and it’s all good! we enjoy time together and time apart. distance is very healthy, i’d get sick of him if i was with him every second lmao. we also have really fun dates and a lot of different types of dates, as well as sex lmao the variety keeps it alive. we also go on holiday all the time!! we love spending time abroad together.

but as he’s always travelling to other countries (aside from holiday) due to his job, i’d say we see each other like 7/12 months of the year, adding all the weeks up. like i’ve never gone more than two months without seeing him straight (i think i’d kms) but there’s odd weeks and weekends where we can’t see each other and as much as i miss him, the distance is needed sometimes!! i can’t explain why tbh, it just is. it’s healthy.

but like me as a person, the fucking around life isn’t for me, neither for my bf, i just love stability!! like i crave it. we try to be as healthy and mature as possible, don’t get me wrong, we argue and fight and there have been times in the past where we’ve been close to ending things (we did once) and we’ll go days without speaking to each other cus we’ve pissed each other off (normally it’s me fucking up lol :( he’s really great and patient, the one time we broke up was cus of me too sadly) but we always reconcile!! we always make up and communicate. and apologise. and move past it. arguments make us so much stronger. we understand each other a lot more, we know how to deal with each other. everyone around us says they see and feel how in love we are so :)) yeah i hope my advice helps lmao

[invisiblegarters]

All The Liquors Ep 3 & 4

Or, as I like to refer to it (affectionately), Adventures of Adorable Alcoholic and Chef Uncompromising. Because I still don’t know anyone’s name. But hey, maybe one of these episodes. 

Ep 3

So it looks like the only waiter who can put up with Mr. Uncompromising is out of commission. Arm is in a full sling, damn. That was an unfortunate fall. He’s like, there has to be someone who you will be able to work with, yes?

Chef: you just focus on healing.

Our favorite Adorable Alcoholic (AA and yest that does amuse me, thank you for asking), thwarted in his plans to visit Chef Uncompromising’s restaurant with his boss to try once again to talk him into partnering with them, decides to go to his favorite place to eat instead. And guess who’s there? Yep. They both order the fried squid and of course, AA has soju with his. He does some incredibly unsubtle snooping and learns that the only waiter around who can deal with CU is currently out of commission. My bet is he offers up his adorable services in an attempt to get closer to CU and thus convince him to work with him and his company. 

Okay if dramas don’t stop calling people who look forty at most old I am not going to be responsible for my actions. But wow does CU ever get tense when the crowd shows up - so tense that I’m honestly surprised that his back doesn’t snap. And of course they ask for alcohol and of course AA has a bottle of soju. Of course he does. Look I know it’s his job and he most likely had it to try to make CU taste it and reconsider, but with the fact that he pretty much never stops drinking I have decided that he probably carries random bottles of soju around constantly. 

Have to admit though that the guy knows his food. Chef was not the only one impressed after his little spiel. AA offers to work on the weekends if CU reconsiders the proposal. I guess they’re gonna do a trial run and if it works out, AA wants CU to agree to work with them officially.  His manager is like, “and if he doesn’t?”

AA: then I will look for another job, but I’m confident!

Oh, those famous last words. That’s just asking the drama gods to smite you.

Okay, okay. They got me with the soft “get home safe” CU says to AA after they close for the night. For whatever reason his shy interest in AA is just working for me. He even brings him hangover drink! He’s so smitten.

(seriously though have they said their names yet? Like, at all? Waiter calls Chef hyung. I haven’t heard anyone address AA by name. Am I missing this every time? Someone tell me (I will cackle if they’ve been saying names left and right and my deaf self just hasn’t noted it))

I like that AA is a total foodie, though. He likes his drink but he clearly also really loves food. 

I love his bestie, have I mentioned that? Every single time that he’s onscreen it’s a good time. 

Ep 4

Oh, Korea. You and your pratfalls. 

Pfft do these two seriously keep running into each other at these restaurants or is CU pulling something out of a Police song and doing a little light stalking? Inquiring minds would like to know. By which I mean me. I would like to know. 

Oh wow CU really is gone. I never thought he’d actually sign the contract. Still curious what exactly his deal is, though. 

NAMES we have names! I’m happy even though nicknames are fun too.  

Aw, did he think that he’d be working closely with Ji Yoo? That’s adorable why is he so damn cute? And then basically getting Ji Yoo helping him written into the contract. Cute, cute, cute. Although I don’t actually blame hm on a purely practical level - his crush knows good food. That’s probably a good 70% of the reason that Ki Hoon likes him so much (the rest is probably his pouty lips and big doe eyes, with a side of refreshingly sweet outlook on life (even if it is a little soju soaked)).

Although man oh man, that discussion with the bosses was painfully awkward. To have your abilities both talked up and talked down in the same conversation. Yeesh.

And yest another pratfall. Sigh. At least time the wet floor was the culprit and not Ji Yoo’s drunken clumsiness. 

“It’s like a scene from a drama, isn’t it?” You don’t say!

They really are cute, though. 

I’m wondering now if maybe Ki Hoon doesn’t drink because he gets sloppy fast. I really hope it’s nothing too serious like he’s a recovering alcoholic though, because that’s...nah, the tone of the drama is too light for that. I’m going with gets either amorous or has no tolerance and gets ridiculous. 

Or has no tolerance and passes out after one shot, apparently. Oh, dear. 

Why does all the food in this look so damn good? Now I want that ramen/spicy chicken fusion. And ha, Ki Hoon totally did follow Ji Yoo to the chicken place. Oh, honey. 

I have to admit I wasn’t sure if I was entirely into this last week, but now I am. The food and the cute have me. 

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

okay, gonna like, spend as little time as possible on this sorry bc the more effective way to do this would just to write the damn essay. but you'll have to wait for that i guess. sorry for not responding to every point as detailed. also sorry in advance im sure this is gonna get longer than i want it to

to the personal views & general philosophy: yeah, agree, generally, more or less. some parts slightly more some parts slightly less, but like not enough for our actual politics to end up in different places, obviously. pretty sure we knew that. this imaginary essay is a lot more about philosophy than politics. it's about doctor who, not real life (by which i mean it's art for fun and thinking. it's not about What We Should Do About The World) im not prescribing anyone anything, im not saying They Shouldnt Call The Doctor Things In The Text. im not saying it's harmful or anything, this isnt about that.

what im saying is i think it's more interesting when we dont. like we can accept the trans stuff in the star beast bc it's good for trans people right? but we can still think it sucks artistically a little bit? same thing. people can call the doctor audhd nonbinary ace, im not saying that Harms The World Or People. i just dont like it, thats all. arguing about taste, again, theres no point.

Within the Doctor’s own culture, they are extremely different, and if their culture had the words for autistic/adhd/genderqueer/whatever they would be them by their own society’s culture too, not just ours. Saying that they’re not those things they’re just Not From Here doesn’t make sense cus the Place They’re From thinks it about them too. For it to be a they’re ‘Not From Here’ thing the Doctor would fit normally within their own society but they don’t.

i know theyre alien inside their culture too, thats part of the Not From Here. what they are, fundamentally, is an outsider. alien on earth, renegade on gallifrey, timeless child in the universe. they are From Somewhere Else. they are Off. Wrong. Different. theyre Not Like Us. doesnt matter who us is. theyre on the outside looking in. theyre the perpetual other. which like i said is an experience most people can relate to for many different reasons. and also like i said this is why their (non)whiteness is integral to this too. but again, i want to see more of what we're doing with 15 in the text and also i need to read more books first to be able to think anything about that

Trying to follow. But might not be, the idea that you can’t label the ‘other’ parts would seem to contradict that - that the Doctor and us share the same sorts of experiences of othering (despite alien society) that allows one to see ‘same hat!’ and label it so would…fit that, wouldn’t it? Perhaps with the same fluidity we give them on assigning a political spectrum to them, but ‘being defined by what you aren’t’ is surely labelling of ones’ characteristics in a nutshell. That is the construction of ones’ sense of self. The definition of one as an entity and how best to navigate the world with those tools.

not entirely sure i follow you here either so 🤝but i think i get sort of what youre saying bc ive heard these kinda words before i think. im gonna try to say again what i think im trying to say in those tags and if that doesnt work i'll just be back next year with the essay and we can do this when i actually have words for what i mean, alright?

(please just bear with me for these last few paragraphs because im speaking at you now from the future where ive written these last few paragraphs and i think i managed to make my points clear)

first part: the doctor

the doctor is a perpetual other (agree/disagree? check which applies?)

the doctor is stuck in the narrative that has their name on it (this is my pet train of thought/fave thing to think about with doctor whomst, youve probably heard me vaguely gesture at this idea before)

this stuckness consists of their role/function as a main character in an ongoing adventure show (adventure=we dont see the downtime much. ongoing=60 years of yes-anding stacking plot upon plot upon plot. plot=dangerous dramatic situations with high personal stakes. (these definitions are for the purposes of this sentence only, not at all an attempt at defining these things in general)

this stuckness means that they experience emotional and physical traumas (not necessarily always/ever called that in the text, but at least in new who i think written and watched with a degree of understanding thats what they are (the emotional traumas perhaps more so than the physical ones) that they because of the no-downtime-just-more-plot nature of the show dont get screentime to heal from

screentime equals actual time because as a fictional character the doctor, by their own acknowledgement (hello 4th wall beloved), doesnt exist without an audience

because of the longrunning yes-and nature of how the show is written, these constraints brought on by the format of the narrative have to be absorbed by the narrative itself. whats on our side of the fourth wall moves through it to the doctor's side. what was out-of-universe becomes in-universe (this connection and its potential to move things through it has existed since the show's first episode because of the name of the show being the same as the name of the character)

second part: us, i guess?

i think everything is stories (this is another agree/disagree checkpoint. in contrast to the first one i dont necessarily expect anyone reading this to agree with this one (i do think we agree on the first one or this entire conversation is like a moot point) i just think it's useful to see that this is a premise we have the option to disagree on and if we do i think it's useful to know that before moving on and confusing ourselves more) when 11 said souls are made of stories not atoms, i agree with that. an identity is a story, a history is a story, memories are stories. everything is stories. history, nations, ethnicity, race, culture, it's all stories. i think we construct the world by naming it. in this philosophy words=names and concepts=stories. everything is stories.

if every social category we can belong to is a story, then i think the way we as people are stuck in the stories that are applied to us (willingly by ourselves, or against our will by others, and even/especially the ones we dont even realise are there) mirrors how the doctor as literal fictional character is stuck in their literal story. our birth & our bodies are our destiny in the same way that the doctor's scripts are. but we can name them, right? queer, disabled, autistic, english, dutch, white, european etc we can name them. we might be aware of some stories more than others, we might bang on the walls a bit, we might stretch the walls. like the doctor talking to the camera or humming their own theme song.

but to me (and this is another agree/disagree and i think i can guess you guys will land on disagree but thats alright, i dont need to convince, i just want to convey) knowing the story doesnt make me feel less trapped. knowing the word for it just lets me see the camera, if that makes sense, the story stays the same. i'd rather try to break the walls down. not "we're all a little autistic uwu", but we all have the same needs that must be met. they cant be met in all the same ways and some people have more needs already met than others do, but fundamentally they are the same needs. and meeting them is what makes you a person. having those needs acknowledged and worked to be met by other people is what makes you a person, that is being treated as a person.

and somewhere in all those bullet points i think is what i want to write an essay about

the doctor isnt neurodivergent or autistic or adhd or nonbinary or genderqueer or asexual. what the doctor is, is Not From Here

[delicrieux]

☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”

PART 13: ...O-OH?

it’s the night of the big stream. y/n uncovers a strange, albeit deep, bond with charlie. corpse interrupts her garden date with sykkuno quite unceremoniously. tensions are high as ever; proximity chat reveals internal monologues and stray thoughts. y/n’s “batshit insane” energy affects everyone. this is, quite literally, the best game of among us bretman has ever played.

─── corpse husband x reader, sykkuno x reader (if you squint, it’s very one sided)  ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 6.1k oops ─── ❥ reqs: sum people requested some interaction w bretman + jealous corpse + flirty sykkuno

author’s note: guys....GUYS WE’RE ON THE 3RD “OH” hope ur excited cus i am!!! this was rly fun to write, but then again, everything is better than writing an essay lmao! this is extremely chaotic and a bit seggsy but like a minuscule bit u wont even notice it i swear xx there’s not much social media in this one, mostly written lol. as always lmk wat u think n thank u for all ur kind words n sooo manyyyy ideassss!!! love u lots

ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous. ҉   next.

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It’s happening, you think, picking the discreet, angelic white color for your astronaut - with a halo and all, truly, you are a seraph that stepped through the gates of heaven and descended onto earth to grace these morals with your presence...quite literally, you’re not only donning white in game, but also in real life, cute as a button or more like as a bunny. Cat girls are overrated - cat boys, on the other hand, you’ll ardently defend till your last breath - but bunny girls...Safe to say, your chat had been going feral. Your endless ego is fed well. You even swore on your heart that no devilish trickery would follow in this game - you had left your snake ways behind you.

No one believed you. The Roaches know you too fucking well.

The influx of new subs, however, do not. Look at this cute girl! She wouldn’t hurt a fly! You chuckle at the compliments. At the exact same moment, Rae pipes up on the discord call, “Y/n is leering and cackling evilly. No one trust her.”

Demon woman herself must be watching your stream before starting her own. You pout, all adorable and innocent, but your eyes gleam slyly. Truly, a mastermind of manipulation! Look at you go! The chat is swooning. The viewer number steadily climbs past 16K and you hum happily, welcoming all that decided to join your little clan, “Don’t listen to Rae. Wifey is mad because I said I’m not bringing her back a souvenir. Well guess what, bitch, I��m the gift.”

Your perfect image does not quite align with your tone, nor the affectionate nickname you call your roommate (bitch, not wifey). The new viewers are none the wiser though, just like your new stream mates.

There is laughter from people you don’t quite know. The lobby is almost full, but not everyone has trickled in yet.

“Filing divorce papers right now.” Rae mumbles, but you hear the smile in her voice. It makes you crack a grin, too. 

More hello’s and shy introductions to the people in the lobby. Sykkuno’s green astronaut pops in with a upbeat, “Hey, everyone! Hi, Y/n!” as his character circles around yours. A collective awww echoes in your stream chat as you, quite breathless at the wholesomeness, reply with a “Hi! Hi hi!” as well.

Corpse is next to join, mysteriously ominous. The discord call is pure chaos, everyone screaming over the other variations of his name while stressing different syllables. Silent as a grave, he just stands there, his black astronaut seemingly eyeing everyone in the lobby. 

Alas, when the noise dies down, he utters, “Whaddup, baby.” and it’s pandemonium all over again. You are screeching/laughing along with the rest. His astronaut swiftly glides to Sykkuno, still circling around you, “Hey, Sykkuno.” He says. The latter abruptly stops. The game hasn’t even started, and already - betrayal! Sykkuno starts circling around Corpse now, leaving you in the dust.

“Hey, dude!”

“Yo,” You interrupt, “I’m like here too, yeah?”

“Fight, fight, fight!” Pokimane jeers. You can’t see her, but you’re certain she’s pumping her fists in the air. 

“Let’s leave the bloodshed for the game, yeah?” Dream offers past her laugh ridden urging.

“No, fuck that, let’s start this shit right now,” Charlie declares - his monotone is strangely pleasant to the ear, and you lean back in your chair with a thoughtful hum. Something about his energy just clicks with yours instantly, but perhaps you’re judging too quickly- “Got my fucking knife ready to slit some throats. You can all pretend you aren’t ready to kill on sight, but that’s not me. I’ll teabag your dead fucking body.”

-yeah, no, your initial estimate had been correct! What a pleasant surprise, you feel like you and he will get along beautifully. 

“Way to be subtle, Charles.” Rae snorts.

“Subtle doesn’t make an interesting game, Rae,” He’s quick to bite back, “and if I’m Impostor, you bet your fucking ass I’m going after you first.”

“Noooooo!” She shrieks, rushing to your astronaut, which is still just standing there, abandoned, like the equivalent of that one emoji, “Y/n, protect me.”

“Of course, baby.” You purr. 

There’s mumbling in the discord call, though it’s barely audible. Corpse seems to be repeating the word to himself: Baby...Baby?...Baby...

“You’re gonna stab me in the back the first chance you get, won’t you?” She questions, already painfully aware of the answer.

“You know it!”

“Finally, someone that’s not fucking cowering in their boots and flaunting their real nature.” Charlie says, “Y/n, form a Big Dick Alliance with me.”

“Oh for sure, man.” You agree immediately, trailing to his in game figure, “Let’s show these virgins how it’s done.”

“This is going to be a mess, isn’t it?” Sean’s voice rings with a cheerful laugh, making you flustered. Yes, you’re actually playing with THE JacksepticeyeTM. You still haven’t fully wrapped your head around that part, “I’m very excited to see where this will go.”

“Nowhere good.” You say with unparalleled sincerity - every word you speak to him, the icon, the legend, the one of the few youtubers you actually actively follow, must be genuine. You doubt you can lie to him. He’s too good of a person. You admire him too much. Stuck between wanting to be a shady bitch and an absolute saint, you refrain from addressing him more - you are simply not worthy.

its the y/n trying to act like a normal person in front of jack for me

ikr she looks ready to join the monastery

each day we stray closer to gods light???

Your viewers are snide as always. Gosh, you love them.

The last player pops in, fashionably late, “Hey, y’all.”

“Hey, Bretman!” The call choruses somewhat harmoniously.

“Hi, daddy.” He’s speaking to Corpse now, a smile in his voice - you can hear it even past the static of his atrocious mic. Your eyes widen, eyebrows shooting up. Your friends are cackling, but confusion refrains you from doing the same - were you not the only one Corpse offered, seemingly so long ago!, to be his sugar baby? 

One betrayal after the other. You’re glad for the Big Dick Alliance. The name has a nice right to it, too. 

Corpse laughs, “...Hey, Bretman. How are you today?”

Damn, two sentences for him, but not even a word spoken to you!? You’re already scripting a very melodramatic paragraph you will text him after the stream. With poorly masked discontent, you mutter, “Wow, thanks for such a warm welcome, Corpse, my day’s going great, yeah, loving the company.”

“Now now miss girl,” Bretman chimes, “we can’t be all daddy’s favorite.”

“Careful,” Charlie drones, “I think you just got yourself onto Y/n’s shit list.”

“Right next to Corpse Husband and Valkyrae.” You agree, “Sykkuno!” You suddenly call him.

“Uhm-Uh-Yes?” Is his nervous reply.

“You’re safe.” You state coldly, “For now.”

“You are not going after Sykkuno on my watch.” It must be a belated holiday miracle because Corpse finally decides to address you. His words seem to awake something in him, “Hey-Hey-Hey-” He swiftly glides to you, standing right next to your minute virtuous angel, “When are you coming back to Cali?”

corpse stop acting weird challenge

literally omg lmao

he does bring up a good point y/n y u not in cali yet?!

^pack it up corpse simp he disrespected the queen when he didnt say hi

“Back off, buddy,” Charlie interjects, “this spot is for Big Dick Alliance members only.”

“I’m never returning.” You inform him, your voice cold like the Arctic snow, and the look in your eyes is no kinder. You feel like you’re having a stare down through screen. 

Silence stretches. Is this an intimidation tactic? Because if it is, it’s a paltry one. Your conviction to be petty is stronger than any vulnerability you might feel.

“Then I have nothing to say to you.” He admits and fucks right off with that. Fine, go join Sykkuno and Rae in their little corner of betrayal! Friendship ended with Corpse, now Charlie is your best friend.

“Okay, guys, guys, guys-” Toast, noting this is going to spiral any minute now, tries to catch their attention, “Let’s start?!”

You look into your camera, and the roaches know what you’re thinking. You’re twins like that, communicating telepathically. You are taking back your tender promise of not being a conniving bastard. It’s fucking on. You will destroy everyone in your path, starting with the guy you have a stupid crush on - maybe?! Feelings are confusing, you’d rather just not think point blank period.

With no objections from the cast, the counter ticks away seconds and, for the first round, you’re stuck as CREW MATE.

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Charlie is a gift. Truly, you had not expected such a sudden, wonderful relationship to bloom. How have you not known of him sooner?! It’s a crime that you hadn’t spoken to him earlier. You are a 100% certain if you had found him before you started streaming, he would’ve been a big inspiration. 

The two of you do your silly little tasks and curse like sailors, commenting about this and that thanks to proximity chat. You wouldn’t have been able to stand the claustrophobic silence if it was just a normal Among Us game - to think, missing out on all his foully worded quips! It almost springs a tear into your eye. He’s just as unhinged as you.

worried about this dynamic 

its a trainwreck lol i love it plz collab more plz

Caught in a headed discussion in Electrical - TikTok trends, or audios specifically - you defend the app the best you can. Charlie thinks it’s super cringe, and you insist it’s part of the charm as you connect wires.

“I mean, have...-do you know that one audio, the one that goes, like,” You’re spilling your words, heated, frustrated that he’s so dismissive of the app that literally saved 2020, “it goes like, uhm,” You clear your throat, prep your voice - even take a sip of your favorite drink. Drawing the syllables, you try your best to make it drop an octave - it must sound like you’re doing an atrociously bad and nauseatingly scratchy Corpse impression with an extra dramatic flair, “My assssssss, your cockkk, you do the mathhh.”

“Did-Did I just-” You freeze hearing Corpse’s voice, finally done with your task. Charlie is muffling his laughter behind his palm; Corpse’s astronaut stands in the doorway, “What the fuck did I just walk into?” He seems genuinely confused, though a strangely winded. You’re mortified. Your shoulders are shaking. You look at the stream chat but it’s going too fast for you to follow. Manic laughter bubbles in your chest and you squeeze your eyes shut, mouth split into a toothy grin, lowering your head and trying to hide the blush dusting your cheeks.

“Hey? Guys? What the fuck are you talking about?” He questions again.

“Honestly?” Charlie chimes, “No fucking clue. TikTok, I think. Ask Y/n.”

You can’t reply. You’re crying. You cover your face with your palms, muttering a soft oh my god before bursting into a full blow laugh, throwing your head back, the motion accidentally knocking your headphones off.

“Y/n.” Corpse calls you, “Fuck was that?”

You’re howling. Your stomach hurts. There are literal tears in your eyes. You think Charlie might be laughing too, but you can’t really tell over your loud screeching. Hastily fixing your headphones, you wipe away the tears stuck to your lower lashes, heaving, “S-Sorry, I-” You stutter, breaking into another fit of giggles. Corpse patiently waits you to calm down. Catching your breath, you start again with a sniffle, “TikTok, yeah.” You idly fix your hair, trying to bite down a smile, “It’s an audio.”

“What- What kind of videos are you watching?”

“The good kind.” Your reply is instant, merciless, “Also, why are you here? We’re having a BDA meeting, you know.”

“I-I...” He trails off, “I...I heard people talking and...I just came here to check it out, but...I’m regretting it.” There’s a lilt in his voice, and you know he doesn’t regret jack shit. You bet he’s smiling. You wish you could see it.

“Bitch, then leave!” You huff. You aren’t sure what is with him today, and you don’t want to stick around and find out - his playfulness makes your stomach flip at the most inappropriate times! Like when you’re trying to sound threatening. You must retreat posthaste, “No, wait, I’ll do it for you.” You say, brushing past his character. Charlie follows after you.

“Dude, you’re so fucking lucky neither of us are the Impostor because you’d be deader than I’ve been feeling since I was 10.” Your favorite companion comments. Charlie is truly a modern wordsmith. You’re pretty sure you adore him, because you’re nodding your head, so quick to agree with him that even you’re surprised. 

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A meeting is called. You spare a glance at your fallen crew mates. They will be missed. Sean most of all, God, why does heaven always take the good ones?! The game feels emptier without him, even if you really only passed him once on your trek to Cafeteria with Charlie.

You may or may not have been avoiding him, afraid you’d accidentally say something horrible and he would hate you. It’s a silly fear, though a deep one. And with Charlie keeping you company, you had not uttered a single objectively  good, or even coherent, sentence. Your parents can’t watch this stream once it’s uploaded onto your Youtube channel. They know you’re barely keeping it together in most of your videos, but here, now? Yeah, no. Charlie is already hard to listen to on his own for sensitive viewers, and hearing you agree with literally everything he says with your own chaotic ideas? Your dad would stumble into an early grave.

Mom probably wouldn’t mind too much, but you’d have to explain your relationship status again. She is under the assumption that everyone you collab with is your significant other. You’d say it began with Sykkuno, though the exclamation of “Finally! My daughter isn’t pathetically single! We need to celebrate.” had started with Rae. Truly, a scandal.

Speaking of which, Sykkuno is gone, too, but you had time to mourn him already. You found his body roughly ten minutes ago; so torn with the fresh agony of heartbreak, you could not do anything else but cry. It was Charlie, bless his heart, that reported it.

“Someone killed Jack,” You say, voice dripping with venom, “court is now in session. I’m ready to vote the fucker out.”

People speak all at once. Toast roars over them, “ORDER! ODER IN COURT!” as he slams his hand onto his desk repeatedly. That seems to work, though briefly.

“I think it’s Y/n.” Corpse says. You stare at him, hand gripping your heart, mouth falling open in surprise.

flame him

corpse boutta be a corpse fr

beat his ass queen!!!!!

“Pardon my french,” You grumble, “but nani the fuck?!”

“It’s definitely Y/n, I found her and Charlie conspiring in Electrical. Surrealist experience of my fucking life, but it’s definitely her.”

“Dude, we’ve been over this,” Charlie sighs, shushing Rae who was about to comment something - knowing your luck, it was probably in favor of the man throwing you under the bus, “we would’ve snapped your fucking neck the moment you walked in. But we didn’t.”

“Yeah, we didn’t.” Corpse notes, “I said nothing about you, I’m just saying it’s definitely her. She probably didn’t kill in front of you because of your stupid alliance-”

“Someone sounds salty because he wasn’t invited.” Pokimane snickers.

“-or possibly she did tell you and you won’t betray her for the exact same reason.”

“That’s some big brain logic you pulled there, genius,” Charlie says, absolutely unimpressed, “sure you didn’t have an aneurysm trying to connect all of that together?”

“Well,” Rae pipes up, “Y/n and Charlie did say they will kill right before the game started. If you ask me, it’s not unbelievable. And Sykkuno was sorta on the shit list.”

“I’m writing down your name twice, Rachell.” You spit.

“Not helping your case at all, Y/n...” Dream worries, “And Rae makes a good point. Charlie and you have professed desire for murder. I’m just saying! It’s a bit suspicious, you know?”

The next words to leave Corpse’s lips sound incredibly smug, “See?” He drawls.  The pressure is getting to you - you don’t understand where this beguiling talent of his to convince literally everyone comes from, but it doesn’t inspire any confidence. Your fist suddenly feels incredibly lonely, so useless - oh, how you long to swing at him, “It’s definitely Y/n.”

“I dunno...” Toast mumbles.

“It’s Y/n.”

“Corpse-” You try, but he's ignoring you - shocker, as if he hadn’t been doing that from the very start of this stupid game - and chanting your name like it’s a fucking mantra or something, a smile in his voice, knowing, relishing in the fact that he’s grating on your nerves, “FIRST OF ALL,” You scream into the mic, successfully cutting him off; catching your breath, you exhale, and continue, calmly, lowly,  “get my pretty name out of your mouth.” 

There’s a pause full of tense silence. 

Then, there’s a sound, seemingly stuck in the back of his throat, “...O-Oh...?”

“Second of all,” You continue, words like honey dipped in arsenic, “This is the clearest smear campaign I have ever witnessed. By how hard you’re trying to frame me for fuck knows what reason, I’m led to believe it’s you that killed them. You’re the Impostor.”

“Corpse wouldn’t kill Sykkuno, though.” Rae comments, skeptical.

“Then the other Impostor did it.” You counter.

“Maybe you’re both Impostors.” Pokimane chirps.

“Y/n would never betray the Big Dick Alliance like that.” Charlie states.

You grin, “Charlie, I literally love you.” 

“Wait hold up now,” Corpse seems to get his bearings together, “what’s this about love I’m hearing?”

“I have none for you, dick.” You snap, flipping him off. Your chat cheers. While he can’t see it, you hope he senses it through the screen, “I officially hate you.”

“No, wait-”

“Boo, Corpse, you suck.” Toast laughs.

“Y/n, please-”

“Let’s all vote for Corpse Husband, okay?” You say it like it’s his full official name with an encouraging smile and multiple soft nods. Sykkuno can’t be here to nod, so you’ll do it for him. You eye the rapidly decreasing timer before clicking on Corpse’s figure and voting for him. The VOTED icon instantly pops up beside your adorable astronaut.

“Baby, I-” It slips past his lips so easily, as if he’s not even thinking about it, like it’s only natural to call you that and a spike of anxiety shoots up, making you glare. It’s only halfhearted. You try your best to ignore the rapid and uncoordinated pulses of your heart. Replace unwanted feelings with anger and hate - works like a charm, every time.

“You are not allowed to call me that.” You hiss. The chat spams snake emojis. 

“Wait-” Bretman chimes, “Hold up, y’all, slow down a minute. Why does Corpse never call me baby?”

“Yeah!” Pokimane agrees, “I want to be baby, too!”

Pokimane may not have been called baby, but you just single-handedly decided her nickname for her - Target 4. Welcome to the shit list, she is officially your public enemy number 1. You aren’t sure why the thought of Corpse ever referring to anyone else as baby makes you sick to your stomach (you actually do know why, but brain no think at the moment), but you wish this whole conversation never happened. You don’t like it.

20 seconds left. More VOTED icons appear by your friends. Corpse is the last one to cast his ballot at, you assume, you, as the rest wait for his quick explanation before everyone (or not) returns to the game, “...Because she’s my baby.”

Goodbye. Life had been sweet, and there was sorrow, though the amount of embarrassment you feel now is worse than when the internet found your cringe worthy high school pictures on your mom’s Facebook. It’s a mixture of dread and excitement - the pleasure of being noticed, cherished even, though anxious from vulnerability. Someone is screaming a very prolonged “WHAAAAT?!”, or maybe multiple people are, you aren’t sure, your ears start to hurt from the loud, conflicting cacophony of voices as you stare blankly at the screen. You received two votes, just like Corpse, Charlie got one, the rest skipped. With no one flung out, you all find yourself back in Cafeteria again.

Baby. My baby? My baby. My baby. The sentence is playing ping-pong in your mind, reverberating louder each time. You’re actually speechless for the first time in your life; your chest hurts, your heart beating so fast your hands start shaking. Had he meant it? Or was this a some joke? Was he trying to get a rise out of you again? You might just go insane from so many questions. My baby. Holy shit, this is a heart attack, this is what a heart attack feels like, dear God, you figured you at least had ten years before you get one!

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First round ends with IMPOSTORS raining victorious. Your sixth sense had been working wonders since, true to you previous estimate, it had been Corpse. His companion was Pokimane. For absolutely no reason what’s so ever, you change her name once more from Target 4 to Target 1. Normally, you’re all for girls supporting girls. Men don’t deserve anything, really, but now you’re so flustered and still reeling from what you are 80% sure was cardiac arrest that you genuinely don’t care about your established morals.

Round two starts without much deliberation. You get CREW MATE again; the game must sense your growing bloodlust, making sure that once you do get IMPOSTOR, you will not hold back. True power is granted to those who are ready and strong enough to wield it. You wait for your moment with bated breath.

Charlie is taken from you too early. The two of you were once again caught in a discussion - God knows about what, Minecraft, hentai, oh! your server! - as you tried to card swipe for the umpteenth time. The lights blew out and you just knew one of you was getting murdered there and then. Charlie’s voice abruptly cut off, and you think a part of you died with him.

It’s a cold meeting; with your new best friend being the first to go, everyone decides to skip. You proclaim you seek vengeance. When the meeting comes to an end, Sykkuno is the first to offer his condolences.

“I’m sorry, Y/n.” He says, and while he’s not in Brooklyn, you somehow feel him patting your back. You feign a sniffle.

“There’s nothing to apologize for...” You murmur sadly, “Unless...” Your voice turns sharp as the knife that was surely twisted into Charlie’s back, “It was you?”

“NO!” He exclaims, “I would never-you gotta believe me! I would never kill him. I know he’s important to you. I wouldn’t do that, I swear.”

“He was like a brother to me.” You admit, solemn, “Charlie, if you’re haunting me right now, know I will avenge you. I will not let this go.”

Sykkuno hums, circling around you, “Hey, I have a task in Greenhouse. Would you, uh--Would like to, uhm, join me?” Despite the shaky start, he finishes on a firm, pleasant note. He’s trying to cheer you up. Having lost your closest friend, he’s offering you his company. You accept with a soft smile and a cute “Yes, please!” and he releases an airy little laugh. The two of you make your way to your favorite place in map MIRA.

It’s difficult to stay sad for long when Sykkuno’s so sweet; the atmosphere of the Greenhouse is strangely calming; your problems seem to be left behind the shut doors. If you tried hard enough, you could imagine being in an actual Greenhouse - the warm, damp air clinging to your skin, the unmistakable smell of earth and vegetation, the pleasant silence broken only by yours and his hushed voices and clumsy footsteps.

The two of you are talking. Mainly about your choice of attire. Cat first, Sykkuno ponders aloud, doing his task as you watch the plants grow, now bunny, what’s next? You affirm that you will most likely dress up in cow-print next, or as an adorable sheep. He laughs, admitting you’ll look good in anything before he trails off. His awkwardness is really endearing. 

“Or!” You chirp happily, content with being locked away with him for the whole game. The idea must be playing in his mind, too, because he seems in no rush to leave, “I could, like, dress as someone from My Hero Academia. I watched the stream you did with Stella, the one where she made you look like Todoroki. It was really cute. You were really cute.”

“Oh, uhm-well, uh, thank you, thanks, I, uhm-” He clears his throat, and despite his stutter, you hear the smile in his voice, “I-I think you’d look better, though. Not as Todoroki. Or, probably as Todoroki, too. But, uhm, what character are you thinking about?”

“Maybe Momo?”

“Momo!” He yeps, “Momo is good. Yeah, she’s great. You’ll-uhm-you’ll look amazing. Really. Momo is awesome. Very pretty. Just like you.”

You are blushing. A stupid, toothy grin makes your cheeks hurt. Your eyes flicker to the chat, but again, it’s going wild. Giggling, you thank him for his sweet words, so giddy it’s honestly embarrassing. Why can’t you stop smiling? This is incriminating. You hide your lips behind your palm.

“...What’s this?” Corpse question. You had failed to note his sudden appearance, too busy gushing. “Am I interrupting?”

“Hey, Corpse!” Sykkuno greets. For someone so awkward and shy, he sure is good at hiding it when he wants to. Perhaps it’s all an act and you had been deviously tricked! Probably not, but you can’t help but narrow your eyes suspiciously, finally able to calm down. You definitely underestimated him, you just haven’t figured out how yet, “Not really! Y/n was sad Charlie died so I took her here.”

“You interrupted our date, dipshit.” You deadpan. 

“...Fuck you say?” Corpse dares, his voice low and somewhat menacing - for someone who exclusively portrays his emotions through only his voice, he’s incredibly hard to read. This is payback. Your love for wreaking havoc resurfaces suddenly. Serves him right for pulling all this ignoring shit at the start. Maybe you’ll make him say oh again.

Your sly smirk is promptly wiped. Fuck. He said oh, he literally said oh out loud. The Teruhashi fangirl in you is screaming. You had been so caught up in defending yourself you didn’t even register it at first. Alarmed, you look at the camera, then at the chat. First oh, then my baby. There’s no way he had been teasing you, and this proves it. Holy shit. You mouth the words “HE SAID OH!” for your audience only.

now she notices

snail pace baby we’ve been loosing our shit for the past hour 

corpse x y/n saikik au enemies to lovers 500k words slow burn im here for it

opening wattpad rn^

Your heart races in your chest - it might be considered an Olympic medalist at this point; flustered yet again, you wish you could cave into yourself. You should’ve brought your bright blue wig with you to Brooklyn. Turns out it would have been perfect for this stream. Yes, yes thinking about unnecessary details always works in distracting you from the butterflies throwing a fucking rave in your stomach. 

“I guess it is a date!” Sykkuno admits, “Kinda after a funeral, but still.”

Corpse hums. You’re still too stunned to say anything. The black astronaut with adorable cat ears approaches Sykkuno. 

“It’s not.” He states. Your mouth falls open in shock as your date, your companion, the Shoto to your Momo is murdered in cold blood right in front of you. His lifeless body, cut in half, lays on the tiles by the growing flowers, right beside you, “You didn’t see shit.”

“...I didn’t see shit.” Is all you can utter, breathless and terrified.

“Thaaaat’s fucking right, baby.” Corpse coos, “Now I’m gonna report it, and I’ll say we found Sykkuno together. Better stick close to me after the meeting, got it?”

If Sykkuno is Shoto, then Corpse is definitely Dabi. 

why is that kinda hot tho omg

didn’t know i needed dom corpse since now but i do

y/n looks like shes boutta throw up lmao 

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You follow him around like a lost puppy - because what else is left for you to do!? You’re helpless in this situation. He’s got you in the palm of his hand, successfully eliminating everyone you had previously interacted with. First it was Charlie, then Sykkuno, even Sean, who said hello in passing, was shot instantly. Real Sangwoo behavior. You almost want to scream warnings at everyone to not approach you. You cannot mourn another lost crew mate, you don’t think your conscience can take it. But words fail to form. You’re too weak. You fake cry to your audience. They’re quick to remind you to stop acting like a little bitch.

“Mean.” Is all you say, eyeing the comments.

“Hm?”

“Was talking to the roaches.”

“What are they saying?”

“That I should betray you.”

“...Better not.”

A shiver shoots up your spine and you half believe he will bust down your door and drag you into his basement for real. A nervous laugh slips past your lips, “I won’t, I won’t.” You reassure him, “Don’t worry, I’m sticking with you. I haven’t seen shit.”

“I like that you listen to me. You always this agreeable?”

“You’re kinda not giving me a choice right now.” You grumble, vending yourself a drink while he looms behind you, protecting you. From who?! Himself?!

“Oh my fucking God, finally,” Bretman exclaims, “girl, I’ve been running around the whole map trynna find someone, is everyone like, dead?”

You’re scared to reply. Corpse does it for you, “Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, maybe? Not sure. Where have you been?”

“Oh you know,” Bretman grins, “doing tasks, talking shit, the usual. You two are not, like, Impostors right?”

You shoot a look at Corpse, but he obviously can’t see it. Biting your lip, you murmur, “Nope.”

“Just your regular crew mates doing regular crew mate things.” Corpse says, no, purrs. Because that’s not suspicious at all. You’d recommend Bretman to run, and not only because that sounded shady as fuck. But he seems to enjoy danger, or he just doesn’t care.

“Hmmmm, crew mates, sure. Miss girl Y/n,” He’s addressing you now; you smile anxiously, “How come every time I see you, you’re with a different man?! Like damn, leave some for the rest of us, for real!”

You like Bretman. You like his high-pitched whine and drawl. You would like him even more if not for the complex situation at hand. You fear for his life. Chewing at your bottom lip, you snicker, “Sorry, Bret. I can leave you Corpse if you want?”

He laughs, “Girl, I’d say yes so fucking quick, but I know he wouldn’t want that. Normally I wouldn’t care, but y’all are such a cute couple it’s making me not want to be a shady motherfucking bitch. Changing my ways, embracing the lord. Love it.”

 Corpse doesn’t correct him that you are, in fact, not dating. His lack of reaction unnerves you slightly. Does he...? No! No think! Only exist! You catch that train of thought and steer it away from forbidden territory. Looks like it’s up to you to clear the air, and that is exactly what you do after trying to swallow down the lump in your throat, “Uh, we’re not together, actually. We’re just really good friends.”

“Bitch, then move over,” Bretman says snappily,”go like, back to your other boyfriends. Or find another one. I think I saw Dream near Navigation.”

“Near Navigation, huh?” Corpse hums thoughtfully. It’s a subtle warning, but you catch it. Yeah, even if you try running, Dream’s going to join your other ‘boyfriends’ in the afterlife. Granted, killing someone by just talking with them is kind of cool. Or maybe Stockholm Syndrome is finally kicking in, “Bret, the thing is, Y/n’s scared of dying, so she asked me to stay with her.”

It’s disturbing how good at lying he is. It is also really really attractive, as bizarre as that is.

y/n stop being in a toxic relationship with corpse challenge

making fanart of this omg her face

its the blushing for me girl get your head outta the gutter!

^she cant, it lives there

“Baby, you’re gonna fucking die if you stick with her,” Bretman points out, “have you noticed the mortality rate of her partners? Rest in peace, daddy.”

“He’s right, you know.” You mutter, dramatically looking to the side, “I’m no good, Corpse.”

“Not leaving you, end of discussion. Bretman, join us?” Corpse offers, catching you by surprise. He might still be lying, though. Creating a false sense of security before eliminating Bretman. Probably would laugh while doing it, too. Wow, he truly is evil.

Turns out he doesn’t have to do any of that, because when Dream strolls into Cafeteria, he kills Bretman instead. The two Impostors are finally revealed. You promised not to snitch on Corpse, but you didn’t say shit about not exposing Dream. You press the REPORT button and say just that: “Dream just murdered Bret right in front of me and Corpse.”

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

The last meeting is called. Dream had been voted out with the help of Corpse, and now only you, he, and Rae remain.

“Baby, you know what to do.”

The VOTED icon pops up beside Corpse’s astronaut. Rae wheezes, “No! Y/n, it’s not me, you gotta believe me, I swear it’s not me!”

“...I really don’t know,” You murmur, “I’ve been with Corpse a lot, and...Rae, I’m not sure...”

“Please! I swear it on my Kagayama cardboard cut out, I’m not the Impostor, please! You know me, I’d never lie to you like this.”

“She’s definitely lying.” Corpse says, sounding pleased.

“Don’t listen to him! Remember, during the first round, when he tried to convince us that you were the Impostor? He’s doing the same shit to me!”

“I also remember you agreeing with him.” You remind her.

“I was stupid! Small dumb brain moment! He was using us to win! He’s using you right now!” She votes, “Please, Y/n, make the right choice.”

You’re silent for a moment.

“I’m gonna...I’m gonna vote for who I think it is.” You lastly say.

A slow, lazy grin makes it’s way onto your lips, eyes gleaming mischievously. You had not forgotten your promise to your brother from another mother, you had not forgotten the pride of the BDA, you had not forgotten your beautiful friendship. Two miniature astronauts pop up by Corpse’s at the exact moment Rae screeches “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!”

“Fuck.” Is all Corpse says with a laugh.

The screen changes, informing of the first CREW MATE victory.

Your ears are assaulted with different voices as you appear in the lobby.

“Now that’s what I’m fucking talking about.” Charlie raves, “I swear to fucking God, Y/n, you even got me going for a second. Pulled some 1000 IQ shit right there. It was fucking amazing. Best back stabbing I’ve seen in a while, and I’ve seen a lot.”

“That was absolutely fantastic, Y/n.” Sean applauds, “I really thought you joined Corpse like some crew mate accomplice or something. Can’t believe you switched on him at the last second.”

“That’s my wifey!” Rae cheers, strolling to you, “Love you, mwah.”

“Hey, Corpse,” Charlie calls him, “How does it feel to be a fucking loser?”

“I’m surprisingly fine with it.”

yeah he would be lmao

mom is the best snake ever i love you sm y/n

rae and y/n’s friendship....the feeeeeels

As the rest sing your praises for another solid minute or two, the third round begins. CREW MATE again. Though, just because you’re stuck as an underpaid worker in a dying spaceship, it doesn’t mean you’re innocent. Your last round proved that quite well. You can’t help but silently snicker.

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

TAGLIST IS CLOSED!

tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @bingusmode - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury--moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

[shenzuns]

KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER. REPOST.

name.  kiwi  !

pronouns.  they  /  them  (  +  she  /  he  )

preference  of  communication.  uhhh probably... IMs or discord  ???  i give out my discord as much as i can, but i’m very bad at talking to people BHDFDJF

name  of  muse.  shen qingqiu, or shen yuan depending on who you get acquainted with...  first  ?  it’s very verse dependent, if you meet him when he’s transmigrated then it’s shen qingqiu bc by that point he’s given up his old identity as  “  shen yuan  “

rp  experience  /  how  long.  good god i’ve probably been here since i was like... 13? so...  8 years disgostang

best  experience.  shitposting  !  that’s literally all i do on a daily basis anyways, but my best rp experiences were when the community would kind of get together and do silly shit on the dash. i don’t see much of that anymore at all now lol, unfortunate  !  oh, and, in character games were THE shit like...  i still try to get those going when i can bc there’s nothing more fun than muses meeting each other for the first time to yell at each other about being the imposter or something.  also, when you kind of have a group of people who are in a specific verse, and matching urls, and just idk very community based things were always my type of beat  !

rp  pet  peeves  /  dealbreakers.  i...  don’t really have many actually  ?  it’s quite litchrally the basic principal that people have been touting for years, read rules  (  please god, i know he acts like a straight guy but my man is gay as all hell Do Not approach him romantically if ur muse is fem aligned  ), don’t try to play god without My permission, don’t forceship unless i say it’s cool cus i love forceshipping with my breasties, don’t... tell me what my muse is... or how he could be  /  act like... man.  uhhh, probably also like, feeling as though i have to diminish how powerful or mean a muse is otherwise me and someone’s mun will get off on the wrong foot like...  i’m sorry i don’t control my muse’s power level it’s on UR muse to not instigate a fight if u Know my muse is strong man.  uhhh...  when people complain about posting too much ooc like ok just say u don’t want to have fun or get to know the ppl behind the screen.  also, it kind of squicks me when ppl are like ‘oh ur character isn’t super canon’ like i already have phobias, don’t add to that man  ---  also canon divergencies exist.  and then other stuff is just stupid shit like, if we’re shipping and there’s no reciprocating amount of effort put in it just tanks me, and like.  fighting over ships too lawl like, i get if toxic ships aren’t ppls cups of tea but that doesn’t mean u have to kill someone over it  (  this does NOT include actually problematic ships, yall are adult enough to get what i mean here  )

fluff,  angst,  or  smut.  all i guess  ???  my fatal flaw is liking angst and smut but being too much of a baby to write it out and  /  or talk about it.  like, i’m very bad at writing angst but it’s all i give my muses so I Want To Learn.  and, re: smut i’m... weirdly shy  ?  which is funny bc it’s horny thoughts 24/7 here but i just get anxious and lock up even though i want to write smut. it’s fucked up and evil and i’m the bearer of the curse SFNFKMSF

plots  or  memes.  boooth...  i say tentatively, LIKE i’m kind of bad at plotting is the thing.  i prefer discussing character dynamics and then discussing how things can go from that.  also, s.qq is kind of difficult to plot with i’ve come to slowly realize  ???  but i also Have to plot with him to get anywhere, so u see it’s a pain.  BUT I LOVE MEMES i thrive on memes, it’s the best way i interact  !  i do try my best to send in stuff and i adore getting things in return  (  i’m just slow as fuck but i always smile when i get asks  )

long  or  short  replies.  UHHHH...  it really depends but i’ll be real, i talk too fucking much when i write SHDSFMKFDKM a bitch doesn’t know how to shut up and s.qq is an overthinker so he’s very introspective  (  TOO introspective u might say  ), so while i love the idea of short replies...  it never really works out that way for me </3

best  time  to  write.  man.  who even knows w/ me at this point LMAOO probably night though that’s when everything’s quiet for me and i can vibe, or like.  the early hours of daybreak.  but idk when my motivation, creativity and social battery are up there is usually when i start writing again

are  you  like  your  muse.  KIIIND OF  ???  my friend’s and i like to joke around that i’m kind of a shen yuan at times, i actually really latched onto his character BECAUSE of his neurosis but.  i dunno, i’m not as logic driven as he is, nor am i as stilted emotionally  /  with my affections.  so, yes and no  !  he can be difficult to write sometimes because of how different he is from me, i think.  i’ve never written a muse like him before, so it’s definitely a challenge, but a fun one  !  i also think it’s pretty natural to take on muses similar to you or put parts of yourself in a muse, bc how else are you supposed to understand them on a deeper level yk  ?  it helps with getting into a muses mental imo.

tagged.  @oftwilight​  thank u sybil, ily  !  <3

tagging.  @junshang​,  @feiyuie​,  @mellodiies​,  @kuurtaa​,  @chiheru​,  @hymnblood​,  @fuxian​,  @suender​  &  if ur reading this that’s it. ur tagged, @ me i want to see  !

[carpsurprise]

Hello! are requests open right now? If so, can I maybe ask for some fluff with Penny? I haven't seen much content of her

combing both of these cus literally both of these have been in my inbox for over eight months. im SO sorry im trying to get back into writing... so i hope this lil penny thing makes up for the literal almost year absence i've had in requests.

as usual they/them pronouns for the farmer

———————————————————————————————

characters: penny/gn!farmer

wc: 1,085

synopsis: fall afternoon, the farmer comes across penny, looking for a distraction just as much as the farmer is.

There was no need for redundancy, as each of the townsfolk knew exactly how each shift of the season manifested— overnight, crashing like sea waves and overcoming like a thunderstorm. Similar to the color loosely hanging leaves of the tall maples, the wind had a new chilling bite to it. The people of Pelican Town never changed, though, and each body gradually added more layers as the days closed in on wintertime.  

Maybe, if the farmer were lucky enough, the blackberries would be ripe enough to finally pick. Already stopped outside of the general store, they ducked down to see the bulletin board and calendar. It was blackberry season, among a few upcoming birthdays and the fair. Fall had been a busy time for everyone, it seemed. Villagers followed the cobblestone paths to their own business, calling across the town for each other and tightening their coats around their chests. 

The soles of the farmer’s boots felt tough on their feet, despite the thickness of their socks, only adding another bullet to the mental list of to-do’s before winter. Their eyes fell to the stone walkway as they made their way to the beach, knowing that the frigid ice of stone would only seep into their weak boots. Snowfall, dreaded so, would only make it worse. Yes, another thing to fix. Another thing placed messily in the clutter of other things to be done. As is the life of a farmer, they had learned. 

Penny had caught their attention from the copper grass, curled up beneath an outstretched maple and lazily turning the pages of her book. She had noticed the farmer’s shadow immediately. She closed her book slowly on one of her fingers to keep her place, craning her neck up to see the farmer. 

“Hello, there,” she greeted. 

The farmer matched her small smile. “Hey.” They paused, looking up at the quick breeze of clouds above them. “Kinda chilly to be out here reading, huh?”

Penny shook her head, slipping her bookmark gently into the book and placing both of her hands on the cover. “Not so much.” She smiled. “I’m having a hard time getting into this one. Something about one of the side characters is just irking me. I think the writing style isn’t doing it too many favors.”

“Sorry to hear it.”

“Oh, it’s nothing! It’s just a random pick-me-up I grabbed from the library. I thought it would be fun to pick a book at random and read it, but I guess I see now why people don’t really do that too often.”

The farmer took their own initiative to crouch beside her. “I don’t think I could do it. Are you gonna stop reading it?”

Penny mumbled, shaking her head. “I don’t think so. I hate starting books and never finishing them. It feels wrong to have one in my hand, spend so much time with it, and then put it back on one of Gunther’s shelves.” She sat in thought. “Have you ever had a friend that you stopped talking to after knowing them forever? It feels weird to act like nothing ever happened.”

The farmer stayed silent in their vague confusion.

“That’s how I feel, anyway.” Penny smiled. 

“I guess I could see that.” The farmer nodded. “Gunther won’t mind if you take another one, right?”

She shook her head. “Not so much. Elliott sure wouldn’t read something like this, and we have so many books piled in the back.”

The farmer nodded, moving their line of sight to look at the old wooden building, with its odd coloring and decaying roof. Maybe, maybe, if they have time in the future they’ll talk to Gunther about helping him out— once the burden of the fall season disappears. Another gust of wind had blown past them, racing to the east to settle in the shrubs and trees. Penny shivered slightly, rubbing her freckled hands against her forearms and opening the book again. 

She set the bookmark beneath her, resting the weight of one of her legs atop it to stop it from joining the dead leaves in the wind. “The book won’t finish itself,” she mumbled, giving the farmer another shy smile.

This must have been a cue to leave. Searching for anything else to hold her attention, noting the turn of her head—the way her curls cover her cheeks— and the faint blush of her chilled skin, each had only proven to be a distraction, not a beacon of recovery. The book talk had ended, the farmer had asked their questions, eyed-up the library, and lost themselves in their work all within a matter of minutes.

Another gust of wind.

Penny shivered again, settling her spine deeper into the rough bark of the tree, hoping for some shelter from the earth. With a grin, the farmer pulled off their coat. Crouching by her side again, she gasped at the gentle movement around her. She did not move or reject the offer, but rather stayed still and in silence, nearly carved of stone, from this gift. Her eyes, pooled with questioning, followed the farmer’s frame as they returned to their full height.

“Here ya go, Miss Penny!” They smiled, bending down to get closer to her. 

She gave them a worried grin, lifting her hands to grip at the collar of the jacket. It was fine leather— built for snow, sun, and storm— heavy duty for days spent wrestling with the elements. Panic had overwritten her face as the farmer retracted themselves from her, backing up and signalling themselves away on their journey. 

“Oh, but you need this!” She called out, placing her now forgotten book to her side. 

They shook their head, yelling back to her as they made their way to the beach. “No need! Got another back home!”

Penny’s breath had calmed itself, the chill of the autumn air biting at the back of her throat from yelling. “Are you sure?” 

The farmer stopped and nodded. “Yeah, you can keep it, it looks much better on you than it does on me.” 

They laughed as they watched Penny curl herself further into the seams of their jacket. She followed their figure as they disappeared over the bridge and to the beach. Noting her debt to them, she silently pulled her book back out, dreading the next few pages, but comforted by the new warmth of the coat. If the winter season would favor her so, she could repay them in no time. 

[corvase]

you’ve heard of meet cutes, now time for meet-not-so-cutes

there’s definitely a name for this i just don’t have a clue hahaha

!! some of these are graphic/descriptive and involve accidental violence (like accidentally pushing someone or stepping on their shoe or running into them)

reader discretion is advised !

i was on a call in the store and you thought i was talking to you when i was just yelling at my younger brother because he flushed my pet fish down the toilet so now you think i’ve just called you a blithering idiot haha hey don’t walk away i need to clarify

bonus if they meet somewhere and are forced to interact later (i.e high school, uni, work)

you’re best friends with my crush and apparently my crush liked me too but you decide to tease them and call them out on it in front of literally everyone so now they will probably never ask me out so thanks i guess lol.

Ahem............ “try help me get together with my crush while we fall in love unknowingly trope?” 🤔

hey you’re actually really cu— okay. why are you glaring at me...?

some jerk took my parking spot this morning after nearly crashing into me and i am so pissed off but also i’m moving into a new apartment and oh. i live next door to the parking-spot-thief amazing.

one character can overhear the other making a rude or misjudged comment (the simple misunderstanding)

we are both prosecutors defending/representing opposing people in a case, i know for a fact the person you’re defending is guilty yet you won the case so i genuinely hate you and oh great you’re switching to my firm

i am deathly afraid of dogs and you just ??? let your dog off the leash and let it come towards me and.... it bit me. thanks for two mental breakdowns, lifelong trauma, and literal therapy (i personally would not be able to forgive someone who did this but do have fun creating a reality which someone would)

you literally ran me over with a car. i am now in the hospital and you felt so bad you decided to not only offer to buy me a new car but offer me a flatshare because you got talking to my friend who was here when i was asleep and you know i am currently homeless and ur also looking for a roomie! so. thanks, i guess

hey we’ve never met but ur proposing to me rn.... oh, i’m the wrong person! Oh, my bad, sorry. oh my God your s/o saw that LOL awkward. no, i’ve never met them before, they were looking for you haha. carry on

can meet each other a year later or something and person a thinks b is married but eeh their bf/gf turned them down so they’ve been single for a while.... now for forced proximity 😁

you pushed me into the pool and i cannot swim / am terrified of the water. we ran into each other on campus and you tried talking to me but um, i’m still mentally scarred, so kindly leave me alone!

we ran into each other and books flew and you accidentally..... ripped a fingernail off.

you talked to me really rude just now and told me it was because you thought i was your driver........ because that’s supposed to make it better..................?

added just now because i can’t stop laughing: so my mom had my photo as her dating profile picture and forgot to add that she is 57 years old and you sent her a heart thinking it was me and flirted with my mom a little until she picked up on it and let you know that no, she is not the college student in her profile picture but would u like to meet her?

somehow we meet and you’re really embarrassed because you used like thirty pickup lines on my mother but honestly it’s more funny than anything