#it was literally just giving me photos of renee for a moment there

[anakinfallen]

pinterest tag

first real person, character, quote and outfit when you open Pinterest are your vibe!

tagged by @disasterbuckdiaz @jeeyuns 🥰🥰

tagging: @ghostscowboys @shitouttabuck @darlingavasilva @killianjonesz @courtspiracy

[jacobbellaendgame]

Rewatching New Moon with new eyes is one heck of an experience. I'm taking notice of things I never bothered to notice before (while giving me even more respect for Chris Weitz and a little more for Melissa Rosenberg) and it is a trip.

The Cullens are so worried about their secret but Bella yells out loud about Jasper’s mood control while people are walking around and they’re cool with it?

Edward’s monologue about different suicide options is really discomfiting; while it leads into Edward telling Bella about the Volturi and sets up for what happens later, the fact that he envies Romeo the ability to choose what death he wants when Juliet is gone is just unbelievably tragic and horrific all at the same time - The Romeo/Juliet symbolism = EDWARD/VAMPIRISM IS DEATH (not a good message)

No coincidence that Alice is taking pictures at Bella’s party that Bella doesn't even want (but Alice wants - Alice trying to live through Bella)

Rosalie and everyone leaves due to blood from Bella (but in BD2, Rosalie and Emmett are fine around the blood of Garrett’s victim? make it make sense)

Bella almost uses the knowledge Carlisle gives her to try to manipulate Edward to change her in the truck scene; her true motive is revealed for the rush on the change when it comes to Edward's involvement: “You’re not gonna want me when I look like a grandmother”

Most awkward kiss ever between Edward and Bella in that scene - actually, all of their kisses in this movie are supremely awkward

The bending of the picture of herself with Edward: once again, she’s seeking perfection - her putting the photo in her “senior year” aka last year of human life book: she’s intent on being changed (and Edward removes it, after seeing how she’s bent it aka he doesn’t want her to be changed)

Lovely metaphor - Bella follows Edward and gets lost

No coincidence that Sam found Bella in the woods (when she's "lost") since Bella and Sam are basically in the same type of position with different circumstances: Leah -> Sam -> Emily; Jacob -> Bella -> Edward (and the werewolves don't represent death/fantasy, they represent life/reality)

Bella keeps sending emails to an email account for Alice that no longer exists - here she mentions the Cullens last after mentioning Edward - her goal: vampirism (this is what she’s missing)

Bella’s depression is literally like a withdrawal - the depressed state would be one thing but the nightmares are the giveaway

“The Dead Come Back” - telling of the ending as well as being a tongue-in-cheek nod to vampires

Bella puts herself at risk to get Edward to appear - she is totally uncaring of the dangerous circumstances even after what Edward saved her from in the first movie (and don't even get me started on her not thinking about Charlie and Renee)

The meadow is dried up, looking dead compared to the greenery surrounding it, and here is where Laurent finds her → not only is it imagery that indicates how Bella feels with Edward/the Cullens gone but also for the state of her relationship and for death (which is why Laurent is there and the wolves/life save her from Laurent/death)

“I mean, how much could you mean to him if he left you here, unprotected?” - that's a good point, Edward really didn't think Victoria would use someone else to attack Bella if need be, boy does she teach him that lesson in Eclipse

Bella always attempts to protect those she loves; her mom in Twilight; Jacob in NM, her dad in BD - completely jives with the deer/mountain lion scene later in BD2; she’s unable to protect Edward or the Cullens, which also helps to explain the desire for vampirism outside of the aging and forever-bound-to-her-and-her-to-them factors

Cool effect shot with Paul and Jake knocking down the camera in the woods

Bella sees Sam loves Emily as she is (she may be the imprint/perfect love but she’s still not perfect per se) - Bella should be learning from this moment since she sees her humanity as such a blemish but she takes away the exact opposite from this moment

“What, I’m not the right kind kind of monster for you?” → Jacob wasn’t a vampire, if he was Bella would have been all over him like white on rice; she has a problem with werewolves allegedly killing people but not vampires, more specifically the Cullens who have, especially Edward?

Jake is gone hunting Victoria who is after Bella and she knows it, but hey let’s go cliff diving so we can see Edward again (if this isn’t an unhealthy addiction mixed in with such self-absorpancy, I don’t know what is)

“You’re not gonna lose yourself. I wouldn’t let that happen.” - more Bella protecting

Out of the past few months, the only vision Alice had was of Bella jumping off of a cliff? What about when Jake left?

Bella gives up Jake’s secret right off the bat but was protecting the Cullens’? - more of this unhealthy version of Bella/OOCness that happens when she's around the Cullens/Edward

Let's be real, a little bit of Bella’s anger is when Jake asks how long the Cullens are staying. And if they’re coming back = sore point aka abandonment issues

Edward will think Alice is lying and rush headfirst into death? Really? Even though he’ll also see that Bella traveled with her, what she’s wearing, what their plan is, and that she’s not lying? 

Edward didn’t smell Bella when she hugged him? And for that matter he didn't detect a bit of her scent as she's running towards him?

“I’m human, nothing” - this is the crux of Bella’s problem - even Edward said he envied humans’ mortality

Bella: “She wants to be…” Demetri: “So she will be” Jane: “Or dessert” - important quotes and important scene for Bella - this choice can have one of two consequences

Why didn’t Aro just take Edward and Alice right there? Specifically Alice since he has been wanting to acquire her for years? Edward and Bella can't stop them so...

The fact that Bella still wants to become a vampire after seeing the human children being led to their deaths just makes it that much more unhealthy and tragic and even slightly horrifying - there was nothing Edward, Bella, or Alice could do but this is literally the monster you're becoming, no matter what the Cullens' diet might be

Bella wakes up from a nightmare (which means she’s still having them even after reconciling with Edward) - it’s only when she chooses to be changed that her nightmares disappear until BD1

We get Charlie’s reaction that we should have gotten in Twilight, before and after Phoenix/James

A picture of a wolf next to the door - a certain wolf is there to stay and has taken up residence hehe

Of course Bella doesn’t like it when Edward says they can fool the Volturi and not change her; has Edward not been paying attention? This girl is going to become a vampire come hell or fire

Bella shuts Edward up when it comes to voting time = because her desire to change really has nothing to do with him

“You’ve chosen not to live without her which leaves me no choice. I won’t lose my son.” → I think this particular wording means Carlisle would have voted no if that wasn’t the case

Decision wheel: Rosalie → no (because she knows this shouldn't be a life goal); Emmett → yes (will pick fight with Volturi some other time = he just thinks it's a grand ol' time); Alice → yes (already a sister = you're becoming one of us bitch); Esme → yes (already a part of the family = Edward's not giving you up and surprise or not really, but you're his mate); Jasper → yes (so he doesn’t want to kill her all the time = so her fragile human state that smells way too good is no longer a burden); also it's no coincidence this happens in the same room as the party scene from the beginning of the film

Jake being in the road to stop the car after “Edward, I want you to be the one to do it” → he’s going to be a roadblock to her plan and she's not changing, not if he has something to say about it (which we see he does)

Jake has no problem telling Bella what’s going on vs Edward (we even see this play out again in Eclipse)

Selfish and idiotic Bella: “I love you. So don’t make me choose. Because it’ll be him. It’s always been him.”

And last but not least, like in Twilight, Edward tries to give her more time, will live her life with her, but of course Bella can't have that. Apparently, 23 is the new grandma age. She can't bear to be a year older than Edward, never mind two, even though this guy is basically a walking, talking, crystallized corpse that's been doing that for over 100 years but yes, 18, 19, or even 23 is a problem. My eyes cannot roll anymore than they already have.

And Bella giving in to Edward’s condition that she doesn’t want: marriage. Edward manipulates this, thinking she won’t give in or if she does, then he’ll get what he wants.

It's insane. But man does Chris (and Melissa grumble, grumble) deserve a lot of credit for showing us these things.

[ninyard]

Hi could you write something about Andrew’s eidetic memory and which of the foxes know about it / their reactions to it? I feel like Kevin at least definitely knows and is like a mixture of awed and bitter/exasperated about it

YES I wrote most of a hc post way back in 2016 about Dan knowing about it, but I think Kevin, Aaron and Renee know about it too (but also Coach without actually knowing)

So! How do the folks find out?

Kevin is a pretty perceptive guy, albeit some situations (aka literal son of a murderer) and probably would’ve found out on his own, but he ended up being told by Andrew when he asked one time how he always knows exactly when to pick up Kevs meds/how he knows about all his appointments when he only tells him once. Kevin jokes that he must have a calendar somewhere. Sometimes Kevin will forget about a session with his PT or about a photo shoot or an interview but every time without fail, no matter how long ago he told him, Andrew will be at his door ready to bring him wherever he needs to go. Andrew’s memory serves Kevin in little ways; it’s in reminding him to pay a bill, or cancel a subscription, or pick up something, or if kevin tells Andrew to remind him of something, he always will. Andrew is kind of like Kevin’s personal diary; but Kevin doesn’t abuse that. They never acknowledge it in a “Andrew remembers these things JUST for me” way, and his understanding of it is just that Andrew has a REALLY GOOD memory. Good friends remind their friends to cancel free trials they forgot they had, you know? Kevin never really thought about it deeper than that until the thanksgiving incident, and the moment he put 2 and 2 together, he nearly got sick it hurt his stomach so badly. He never said anything to Andrew, but every now and again he thinks about Thanksgiving, and he can’t help but think about how clearly Andrew must still remember it.

Aaron knows because Aaron just knows. When they went to school together Andrew always did really well in exams without even trying. Aaron could count on one hand how many times he’d seen Andrew ever study. He just seemed to know everything he was asked. He rarely did homework, and while Aaron was busting his balls studying, Andrew was bullshitting answers he’d never wrote, at the back of the class when the teachers asked him to read out his homework. He remembers hearing Andrew’s teachers talking about his photographic memory. I know I talk about it a lot but I feel like it’s fairly significant in all the Foxes relationships with Andrew, but during Aaron’s trial, Aaron’s lawyer is talking about his brothers eidetic memory, and Andrew’s talking about what happened that night, and who Drake was, and what he’d done to him. When Aaron saw Andrew on the witness stand, blank-faced and monotone, talking in detail about what Aaron didn’t see that night? Aaron seen how hard it was in his face, but he saw the intense memories in the panic attacks Andrew would have when he thought no one was watching.

Dan found out in a relatively nice way. Most of the foxes knew Andrew had a great memory, and 90% of the time if they lost anything they could ask Andrew and he would know. Sometimes they would bet on it, but they stopped when they realised he never really forgot like..anything? One time before a Big Game, Dan had lost a loose page she kept in the notebook that had all their opponents numbers, positions, signature moves and stats. She came up to Andrew and was like look I know you don’t want to help me but tell me you know what that sheet said I showed it to you guys last week Matt nearly tells her to give up and then suddenly Andrew is listing off every single name and number that was on that sheet. He didn’t slow down for her to write anything, and didn’t say any of it as if he cared or was interested in knowing. Dan was so grateful but she was like how? How do you do it I remember you looked at that page for like? A second?? And Andrew being Andrew doesn’t tell her, instead tells her Kevin knows and he’s not interested in explaining. She thinks it’s an amazing advantage to the team, until Kevin emphasises he remembers. Everything. She felt bad for wanting to use him for his memory after that, but still sometimes showed him things she would need to know just in case she lost it. Later on in their college career, maybe Andrew stops having to be asked what those sheets said. Maybe he just willingly helps out.

Renee! Sweet angel! Andrew straight up just tells her. They’re talking about some stupid hypothetical, something about time travel, and Renee talk abouts wishing how she could experience some things again; her first game with the foxes, her first kiss, the day she found out she was being adopted (the first time she realised Andrew had a crazy crush on Neil) she asked Andrew if he had anything he would experience again. In Andrew fashion he told her he could experience everything again if he wanted to. When she questioned him he told her. Not much more than that. She doesn’t bring it up after that (but is guilty of asking him where she left things every now and again, specifically at gatherings like the banquets where she would put her jacket down somewhere and forget, or her phone, or her purse)

(Bonus Coach: he found out similarly to Dan. He realises he “learns” stats for Dan, but says nothing, because Andrew is that kind of person that once you bring attention to something he will never do it again. At one point Coach asks him to help scout goalkeepers in his final year, and Andrew can list off the best ones and their information without looking at any notes.)

[winfall]

Episode 1: Welcome to Suplex City (Volume 11)

(background photo by Gerd Altmann on Pixabay) 

(photo by Martha Dominguez de Gouveia on Unsplash)

ACT SIX

INT. SUPLEX CITY HOSPITAL ROOM – LATER

Shane lies in a hospital bed with an arm sling, giving a statement to Renee Young.

Stephanie and Glen quietly enter.

SHANE: This will not affect my campaign run for mayor. I am more committed than ever to putting every last criminal behind bars where they belong.

STEPHANIE: (to Renee) Could you give us a moment?

Renee steps outside.

STEPHANIE (CONT'D): Shane, what happened to you was heinous, and I know you want justice. We all do. But do you really think you're fit to get this city into shape? I mean, look at you. There are monsters out there who are capable of doing much worse.

Shane sees right through her.

SHANE: Oh, I know all about monsters. Thank you for your concern, but I'm not going anywhere. My job is to make those monsters pay for everything they've done, and I won't stop until I do.

STEPHANIE: Then may the best man or woman win.

GLEN: (creepy smile) Get well soon.

They walk out.

(photo by ThisisEngineering RAEng on Unsplash)

INT. RAW TALK STUDIO - LATER

B-roll of the high-speed chase involving the Raw Talk van and the Revival plays.

CHARLY (O.S): Despite our efforts, suspects Dash Wilder, Scott Dawson and their unknown accomplice, whom many have given the name Kane, are still on the run.

The B-roll cuts to Charly on the set of Raw Talk.

CHARLY (CONT'D): If anyone has any information on these three men, do not hesitate to notify the authorities. Every detail is essential. Now to Summer Rae with the weather.

Now off camera, Charly gets up and walks off set for a coffee break.

Kurt joins her. Pours himself a cup.

KURT: I cannot thank you enough, Charly. Your methods were questionable, to say the least, but they got us back on the air.

CHARLY: I just wish we could have done more.

KURT: Those guys may still be on the loose, but you gave the public something they haven't had in a long time. Hope. You were right. Nobody cares enough about the truth. But now they know where to find it.

INT. THE UNIVERSAL CROWN – OUTSIDE BOBBY ROODE'S OFFICE – LATER

Tye bangs on the door. Bobby yanks it open, but just a crack.

TYE: Bobby, what are you doing? Everyone's been looking for you.

He looks behind him. Stacks of cash sit on Bobby's desk. Tye looks him in the eyes, knowing, but not wanting to ask.

TYE (CONT'D): What is that?

BOBBY: It's none of your business. Go home. Show's over.

He slams the door in Tye's face.

(photo by Camylla Battani on Unsplash)

INT. SHAWN MICHAEL'S TRUCK/ EXT. SHAWN'S DRIVEWAY – LATER

Talking Smack is on the radio.

COREY GRAVES (ON RADIO): Our prayers and thoughts go out to Chief McMahon as we hope for a speedy recovery.

Shawn turns off the radio.

SHAWN: You dodged a bullet. Better thank the Good Lord for that.

DOLPH: (defeated) After everything I've done to come this close, yet another opportunity gets stolen away from me.

SHAWN: That place was literally up in flames, and you're talking about a lost opportunity? You will get your opportunity. A better opportunity. It's just going to take a lot of time, and a lot of patience.

DOLPH: What's the point? No matter what I do it's never enough. No matter how high I climb, I get knocked right back down. I have scratched and clawed my entire career just to get one shot. And now... (beat) I'm over it.

He gets out of the truck and heads to the house.

Shawn also gets out of the truck.

SHAWN: (calling after him) If you want to quit, I can't stop you. But everything comes with a price. It's up to you to determine if it's a price you're willing to pay.

The screen door SLAMS SHUT.

PRE-LAP:

THREE DOOR KNOCKS

EXT. SHAWN'S HOME - FRONT DOOR – SOME TIME LATER

Dolph answers the door. No one's there. He looks down. A briefcase lies on the porch.

Dolph looks around the front yard then back at the briefcase. Hesitates. Then opens the screen door and steps onto the porch.

He stoops down and unlocks the briefcase with a CLICK. Opens it. He takes out a piece of paper concealed by the case's lid. As he skims it, his face shifts from surprise to disturbed. He carefully puts the note back inside, shuts and locks the briefcase, troubled.

For a moment he just sits there staring at it... His face hardens. He picks up the briefcase, carries it inside and shuts the door.

INT. PILLMAN'S WAREHOUSE – LATER

The sound of SWINGING CHAINS. Two men with potato sacks over their heads stand with their wrists tied together and chained to the ceiling. The sacks are yanked off. It's Dawson and Wilder, startled and confused.

Roman, Dean, and Seth stand before them, faces masked, menacing.

DEAN: We've got some unfinished business.

END OF EPISODE

-----------

If you’ve made it to the end of Episode 1, thank you so much! Thanks for just taking the time to read any of this story. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I love writing it. I’m a big fan of the WWE and when I was inspired to write this, I was overflowing with joy and passion. I am so happy that I finally get to share it!

If you are also a huge WWE fan and enjoy writing WWE fanfiction, I would love to collaborate. I have so many ideas for this story, but having someone to bounce ideas off of would be great and a lot of fun. So, if you have any ideas about characters or plots, please leave me a note or a message. I would love to see what we can create together! 

God Bless and please enjoy your day! There’s always something to be grateful for if you take the time to take a breath and look around.

Love,

Charly <3 :)

[shit-uhm-sorry]

Renee and Neil ultimate friendship headcannons

Listen i need more of these two being bros in my life so here we gooooo

Neil had once revealed all the colors he had died his hair when the foxes had asked one time, and so Renee shows up to his room one day with a thing of bleach and a box of silver hair dye. "Help me?" She asked sweetly while jiggling the boxes

Neil stood there slightly confused but agreed

Truth be told Renee didn't need help and if she did she usually asked Allison. She'd done this rodeo so many times that it's something she could easily do by herself

But she wants to be closer to Neil so she leads him to the girls suite and sets up in the bathroom

"I need to redo the roots" she tells him as she starts mixing the bleach

Neil nods kind of dumbly and puts on the gloves she hands him

He is fast and surprisingly very gentle, clearly having done this many times

Afterwards Renee thanks Neil and gives him a very small kiss to the top of his head after asking with a yes or no

She managed to catch the small smile just in time before she pulled away

They love to criticize movies together

Renee usually kept her mouth shut on many of the inaccuracies of the movies because she didn't want to spoil anything by bringing up the knowledge kept by Natalie

But then Neil joined in on movie nights and he didn't seem to have that filter

After the fifth time of nit picking the movie the foxes told him to shut up and watch

To his credit he did. But Renee wouldn't be a fox if she didn't like to indulge in annoying her teammates every now and then too

"That wound would kill him in seconds. Especially since he just ripped the knife out immediately."

Neil looked at her and Renee looked back smiling with a mischievousness to her eye

He smiled

The foxes looked flabbergasted that Renee of all people would say that

They soon became annoyed as the two of them bounced back many many inacurracies over the next hour and a half

They have a sort of tradition that on each other's birthdays they will get one another the most ridiculous gag gift possible

It started at first with Neil when he gave her an "atheism for dummies" book

Andrew had apparently suggested it saying shed find it funny but Neil was all tension and nerves when giving it to her

Once she started laughing he noticeably relaxed

Since then its been a constant contest to see who could have the most ridiculous one each year

Whoever laughs the longest at the gift is in the number one spot until it is usurped

They literal time this shit with a stop watch thats how dedicated they are

Neil gave Renee a friendship bracelet that Neil actually made that says "my brest fiend Ranie" in the most atrocious colors imaginable

It had taken the number one spot for two years

Renee wears it every day

Sometimes Renee will invite Neil to the sparring matches with Andrew. She insists he doesn't have to join in, that he can just watch if he'd like

Thats usually what he does

Renee's specialty is spur of the moment decisions when it comes to fighting

Neil doesn't know how fight beyond bare basics but he can read people very well

Specifically their fighting habits and patterns

One day when Andrew and Renee are pretty decently matched, Neil grows bored of seeing the never ending stalemate

He calls out "He favors his left Renee!"

Neil can see the cogs turning in her head on how to strategize with that instead of usually taking the punches and slashes as they come

Andrew never looked away from Renee but he scowled

That split second distraction was all she needed

He ended up on the floor with her knee to his throat a moment later. Andrew flipped Neil off as Neil's jubilant laugh echoed through the sparring room

(Neil made it up to Andrew later by smothering his neck in kisses)

After Renee and the girls graduate Neil makes an effort to write her a letter every now and then

Renee started doing it as a means of giving everyone she loves something physical to cherish

So Neil returned the favor by responding

They'll send eachother things as well like photos, jewelry, cat hair ("No Andrew, its not gross. She needs physical proof that they're real besides just pictures")

One day Renee sent over an old photo she had taken back in their Palmetto days

It was of Renee and Neil at the movie theater with all the upperclassmen when Neil had fallen asleep. He unknowingly flopped right onto Renee's shoulder and she had taken a picture with her phone and had printed out a physical photo

It was worn on the edges and had fold lines and looked like it been kept safe for a long time

The back had "me and my brest fiend Norl" written in sharpie

[carlando]

Ik this is random, but try to do mutuals as drivers

[Note: Not all my mutuals are included here, just ones that I thought I could properly place as a specific driver. I appreciate all of you, I promise, I just wanted to be able to give a definitive answer on who was which driver. Love ya'll.]

@racing-inchident as Lando. The lovable chaotic energy is off the charts. If they met, it would be too much sunshine in one room. Literal children, literal adorable human beings.

@sharkleclerc as Lewis. Okay, hear me out. They are both fashion icons (yes Sara, I'm talking about the pink hair), they give (mostly) no fucks and they are both the elder among a bunch of children.

@silverkasienka as Alex. Calm, collected, kind and articulated? Is kind to everyone and likes having the facts? Yeah, that's Martha. She's lovely.

@sebxvettel as Daniel. Living life, very chilled out, trying their best. For example, I'm like Dan's nephew and Nina is Dan trying to babysit me. It's wonderful. And they both love Sebastian Vettel.

@callumilott as Mick Shumacher. Sweet, introverted sometimes but also really interesting to talk to. Lou is kind but also has her cheeky moments (and whenever that happens my mind goes to Mick and his hobby of lovingly throwing pies at people).

@arthursleclerc as Sebastian. Talented, deals with a lot of stress, and needs more appreciation. Cassy, I think you might actually be Seb.

@nico-nation as George. Both could snatch up men any day of the week as they please (Lauren tell ECB to buy you something expensive, you turned down a sugar daddy for him, make him work for it girl), are sassy in the best way and throw shade politely and with memes.

@mhakkinen as Checo. Talented, goofy sometimes, hardworking, under-rated. Has experience but is still young. The more I think of it, the more they seem like the same person. Noora is Checo, Checo is Noora.

@danielsavocado as Sacha. Wants to enjoy life, get good beauty sleep and take some cool photos. It's the young adult energy and the meme ability. That's Napsi!

@suckmyballshoney as Pierre. Mainly because they both are really sweet, not afraid to be wild and funny, has an appreciation for the small things! Also when they're happy, they show it, which is kind of awesome to see.

@iammany as Kimi. Martina is wise and maybe even all-knowing. Has great advice, keeps to themselves, and are good people. Here for the racing and the fun that comes with it!

@someone-worth-racing-for as Max. Passionate about their interests. And really funny too. Max is passionate about racing, Caroline is passionate about finding photos of Carlos and Lando (sometimes Sacha) that I didn't even know existed!

@beetle-kate as Valtteri. Kind, good-hearted and optimistic. Team player and all around sweetheart. Yeah, I think that properly describes Bailey.

@palalabu as Antonio. Funny and dedicated. Antonio is dedicated to racing and Laras is dedicated to archiving Lando's insta stories (which I have to thank her for, it's so helpful). Also, a sweet person to talk to.

@pit-wall as Romain. Hayley, you should have seen this coming. If you didn't, well now you know. Dear swag kitty, you are the feline embodiment of Mr. Grosjean. Funny, sweet; all around so kind to everybody.

@rene-royale as Charles. You're wonderfully crazy and kind and I love you for it. Awesome person, great meme taste, would 100% dress up in a banana.

I'm also kind of curious to see what driver you guys think I am, so if you want to comment/msg/reblog with that, totally do so! I think it would be fun to see!

[crashclatterbang]

Six - Anne Boleyn Edition (Part 2)

Trigger warning for mentions of a shooting

Anne Boleyn has a reputation. She’s never tried to deny it, even though she knows there’s more to her than wild, flirty party girl. She’s never needed to - not when she has Cathy and the rest of the queens.

But now, staring down at the phone clutched in her shaking hand, Anne kind of wishes she’d denied the rumours when she had the chance because now, even though he knows that she doesn’t want to speak to him ever again, Henry Tudor is texting her. It’s one sentence, six words, not particularly good grammar, and yet here she is, barely able to see through tears. Anne won’t - can’t, really - tell Cathy about this. Or any of the other queens. They all suffered because of Henry and Anne will be dragged kicking and screaming to Hell before she brings up bad memories for any of them. Especially Jane.

But anyway. Thinking of Henry and his general dickishness makes her angry and Anne can’t afford that right now. Coming to a decision, she turns the phone off, leaving Henry on read. It’s the kind of thing he’d hated when they were together and now, it’s the least he deserves, but she’s too rattled to think of a scathing retort. She’s got to get ready for the trip she’s got planned with the others. They’re all going to Bean and Gone, the coffee shop where Aragon used to work before the shooting that had made her famous across the college, to celebrate it’s re-opening. Aragon doesn’t work there anymore, but she’d promised to get them all discounts courtesy of her friend Renee. Anne just hopes there’s going to be alcohol. She could use a drink.

As it turns out, Bean and Gone doesn’t serve alcohol. Fantastic. And as if this day could get any better, Cathy’s sat the other end of the table from her and Anne is stuck next to Aragon. It’s not that she doesn’t like the other queen, it’s more that Aragon’s never really forgiven Anne for calling her frigid in the middle of the school hallway in front of everyone. In Anne’s defence, she’s never really been much for thinking before she speaks, she’s ridiculously impulsive and quite often makes horrible decisions fuelled by sleep deprivation and way too much caffeine. Speaking of bad decisions... Anne’s phone takes the moment to beep loudly, signalling an oncoming text. Anne sighs and pulls it out, hoping that it’s not Henry. As always, her famously bad Boleyn luck lets her down again and she opens the text to reveal-

Well.

Well then.

That was unnecessary. It’s not like she’s not seen that before but the amount of nerve that ridiculous boy has to send her that. Well. Anne feels familiar, burning rage creep up her veins until she feels like she might explode. How dare he? The two of them haven’t spoken since what happened and the fact that the first thing he said was the date request and that picture is appalling, honestly. The fire in her is suddenly extinguished when Jane, her kind face glowing with laughter, leans over the table and jokingly plucks Anne’s phone out of her grip.

“No phones at the table, Anne!” Jane smiles. “Don’t be rude.”

Anne makes a futile attempt to grab at the phone, just as Jane turns it so she can look at the screen. Her whole face goes pale and she looks like she might faint.

“Bunny, what’s wrong?” Aragon says, voice suddenly urgent. “Are you ok?”

Anne feels her face flush as Jane lifts wide eyes to her own.

“How long?” Jane asks, voice level and colder than Anne thought it could ever be. “How long have you been sneaking around with him behind our backs?”

The other queens pass looks between them, all confused, as Anne gapes like a fish. That was not what she was expecting.

“Jane, no,” Anne splutters, reaching across the table for Jane.

Jane jerks away sharply and Anne’s arm falls to her side. The other queens are sharing confused glances as Jane locks eyes with Anne and very deliberately reaches across the table, still with Anne’s phone in her hand, and gives it to Cathy. Anne can’t form the words to tell them to stop as Cathy looks at the phone screen. Anne still can’t say anything when Cathy’s eyes widen and she passes the phone to Kitty Howard, who’s sitting next to her. Kitty snorts in contempt at the photo and so the phone goes round the table until it reaches Anne again. No one says anything and everyone’s avoiding Anne’s eyes.

“Guys...” Anne starts, trying to fix the situation.

As if breaking the silence was a signal, the other queens all start talking over each other until the noise is crashing over Anne like a malevolent wave of disapproval. Renee, Aragon’s waitress friend, chooses that moment to come over.

“Is everything ok?” She asks, half waitress concerned about the other customers and half Aragon’s friend worried about her.

Aragon turns to face Renee, so angry that smoke’s coming out of her ears. Well, not literally.

“Everything’s fine, thanks,” Aragon says tightly, fists clenched.

Renee looks uncertain, hovering awkwardly as Anne tries to disappear into the floor.

“Actually, it would be better if Anne left,” Jane pipes up form across the table.

Anne turns to gape at her, feeling very betrayed. As she glances around the table, eyes drop away from hers and fingers fiddle with empty coffee cups.

“Cathy?” Anne appeals, feeling the world drop out from under her as Cathy doesn’t look at her.

The sinking feeling flees, leaving burning anger behind.

“Fine,” Anne snaps, shoving her chair back so violently that Renee has to dart out of the way to avoid being hit, “fine then, I’ll leave. But just so you all know, I wouldn’t take him back even if he were the last man on earth.”

With that, Anne storms out, making sure she’s halfway home before she lets the tears fall. Damn Henry, for doing this, for reminding her - for reminding all of them - that even though they all broke up him back in high school, they’re all still trapped in his web.

Safely back in her dorm, Anne fires off a series of increasingly desperate texts to the group chat. No one answers her and so she throws her phone at the door, just as her roommate Veronica opens it, cup of tea in her hand. Veronica ducks, somehow managing to avoid spilling the drink, and watches the phone sail past her.

“You alright, Annie?” She asks, and at the sound of the nickname, Anne bursts into tears.

Veronica rushes over and presses the cup of tea into Anne’s hands before sitting down and wrapping her arms around her.

“All my friends think I’m still with Henry!” Anne wails, words muffled by the scorching gulp of tea she’s just drank. She’s British - she isn’t going to turn down tea. Ever.

Veronica wrinkles her nose, patting Anne on the back, and listens as Anne - stuttering and awkward for perhaps the first time in her life - tells her about Henry’s texts and the reaction of the other queens. Veronica listens patiently, then retrieves the phone from the hallway. Anne cheers up slightly when she sees that it’s miraculously still whole and not in tiny pieces.

“You’re going to block Henry,” Veronica tells Anne firmly, and so she does. “And now I’m going to come with you and we’re going to see Cathy.”

Anne almost chokes on her last gulp of now-cold tea and shakes her head frantically, voice having deserted her.

“I’m not the best at relationship advice,” Veronica says, looking uncomfortable. “Since my last boyfriend was a raging sociopath and all, but I’m given to understand that generally people in normal relationships talk to each other rationally when one of them screws up. Am I right?”

Anne nods, sniffling, brain trying to process Veronica’s apparently sociopathic boyfriend. She’s too busy trying to reconcile the Veronica she knows with a sociopath, of all things, that she doesn’t even notice they’ve reached Cathy’s dorm. She has a moment of panic that threatens to make her throw up all over the door that Veronica is currently banging on. Forget butterflies - she’s got goddamn elephants. The door slams open and the elephants collectively decide to start yelling. Anne’s stomach growls loudly as Cathy appears in the doorway.

“Anne,” Cathy says guardedly, not moving out of the way.

Anne gives her a pathetic wave and Veronica huffs loudly, getting in Cathy’s face.

“Alright, Anne’s told me everything and you are being ridiculous. I admit, I don’t know too much about Henry but from what I do know, I’m pretty sure that Anne wouldn’t touch him with a ten foot pole.” Veronica runs out of breath and glowers. Cathy bites her lip and turns to Anne. The elephants start up again and Anne runs through a litany of the most colourful language she can conjure up in her mind as her stomach rumbles again. Cathy somehow cracks a smile and moves slightly so that Anne could get into her dorm if she wanted to.

“I’m making pasta if you’re hungry,” Cathy offers and Anne nods, pathetically grateful.

Cathy opens the door wider, allowing Anne in. Anne turns to Veronica, who gives her a proud grin and starts backing down the hallway, nearly falling over the bucket that’s randomly sitting in the middle of the hall. Anne turns back to Cathy, who gives her a small smile and heads into her dorm as Anne follows her. It’s not an apology, but Anne’ll take it.

[amphtaminedreams]

Filling the Met Shaped Hole (No, Not Like That): The Best Red Carpet Looks of Awards Season 2020

Hi to anyone reading,

I want to jump straight into things and ask a question. Which is the best Met Gala theme of the last 5 years and why is it Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination?

Seriously though, despite the fact that I’m not sure anything will top Heavenly Bodies with the preceding and succeeding Met Galas being relatively disappointing (the camp theme definitely could have been taken further and lets not even talk about the Comme Des Garcons disaster), I still get excited for the gala every year, staying up til whatever hour of the morning so I can see all the fashion live. Of course, it makes complete sense that this year’s event has been postponed until October given the circumstances but the chosen theme of Fashion and Duration had the potential to be quite interesting, so I hope we do eventually get to see it; whilst I don’t miss endlessly scrolling through photos of every white male celebrity wearing the exact same suit and tie to the point where fangirls claim Harry Styles to be a pioneer of breaking gender norms because he wore a pink top, I long for the days where we could all temporarily coexist in peace and harmony thanks to the internet’s collective dragging of the Kardashians for paying no attention to the theme whatsoever. We should’ve guessed life as we know it was about to be flipped on its head when they actually turned up in something interesting last year.

What I’m trying to say is that I would love nothing more than to jump back in time to when tomorrow morning’s top Google search would be best Met Gala looks, and not how many lives did Boris Johnson’s fuckery cost us today. So in honour of the lack of trivial content, I thought I’d fill the Met shaped hole in our lives (amongst many other unfilled holes; today the freezer door at work hit me on the ass whilst I was putting ice cubes out and I think for a split second I got all flushed) by putting together a collection of my personal favourite red carpet looks from this year’s awards season and their respective afterparties: the BAFTAs, Brits, Critic’s Choice Awards, Golden Globes, Oscars, SAG Awards, and the Grammys to finish with.

Enjoy!

British Academy of Film and Television Arts Award (yes, that’s the BAFTAs but I needed a longer title)

(L-R: Zoe Kravitz in Dior, Rooney Mara in Givenchy, and Scarlett Johansson in Versace)

I am a British fan of television and arts but I will gladly say it: of all the awards ceremonies, the BAFTAs is hardly the most exciting, and the red carpet even less so. As I said, lots of boring men in boring suits and middle aged women being dressed by stylists who seem to think we’re dead from the neck down by the time we hit 40 and dress us accordingly so. Any hint of a décolletage explicitly forbidden.

There were a few good looks, however. From left to right, above we have Zoe Kravitz in Dior, Rooney Mara in Givenchy and Scarlett Johansson in Versace, who looks so amazing I almost forget that 1). Versace is going down the drain and 2). Scarlett Johansson would stand in front of a forest and take the role of a tree if she could. Which, along with her whole defence of Woody Allen, is really shit-she’s genuinely great in Marriage Story and an otherwise talented actress. As for Zoe Kravitz, she is up there with Robert Pattison as one of my biggest crushes right now and looks amazing in literally everything she wears, and Rooney Mara is consistently low-key yet elegantly dressed. 

(L-R: Greta Gerwig in Gucci, Florence Pugh in Dries Van Noten, Renee Zellweger in Prada)

Renee Zellweger proved an exception to the rule when it came to women over the age of 40 generally having clueless stylists-her dress is beautiful, very reminiscent of the delicate, demure beauty of 50s icons such as Grace Kelly and Audrey Hepburn. Florence’s dress, I actually really loved. It didn’t seem to go down all too well with actual Florence Pugh fans but red and pink together is an elite combo; I’m still firmly on the “surprised that it works but I’m into it” train. I mainly included Greta’s dress for the green velvet, to be honest; it’s disappointingly low-key for Gucci but nice enough all the same.

(L-R: Andrew Scott in Paul Smith, Charlize Theron in Dior, Daisy Ridley in Oscar de la Renta, and Emilia Clarke in Schiaparelli)

I was particularly excited to see Emilia Clarke in Schiaparelli-yes, I adore her because she played Daenerys Targaryen and I was ride or die for that bitch but also whenever I see her interviewed she has the most exuberant energy and honestly I want to be best friends. It’s not the most interesting dress Schiaparelli has ever put out there, but I like the fact that she went for something unique all the same.

Forest green is a colour I find hard to resist which is why I included Andrew Scott’s otherwise kinda basic suit (points for it being velvet) and Daisy Ridley in Oscar de la Renta. As elegant as the dress is, I would love for her stylist to have really leaned into the forest nymph vibes I’m getting and do something a bit less uptight with the hair and makeup; like imagine loose curls with tiny braids and hair rings and a dark lip and a slight smoke around the eye and...yes, I have very specific visions, I know. As for Charlize Theron, her work with Dior is the only reason I care about the brand; there’s definitely a case to be made here for giving Maria Grazia the benefit of the doubt, assuming that she tries all the prototypes on women who look like Charlize and that that’s why she’s happy to send dresses that are otherwise relatively underwhelming down the runway. 

The Brit Awards

(L-R: Charli XCX in Fendi, Ellie Goulding in Koche, Hailee Steinfeld in Fendi, and Harry Styles in Gucci)

In my opinion a much better reflection of quintessential British style than the BAFTAs, I originally ruled out including any music award ceremony red carpets in this post until I saw Maya Jama and Charli XCX’s looks. Consider me pleasantly surprised by Hailee Steinfeld’s cobalt blue burnout dress, a classic incarnation of the regal bohemian aesthetic Fendi channelled in their 2019 haute couture show. Plus Charli’s emo take on Glinda the Good Witch is also Fendi, driving home for me just how much I love their collections. I don’t know if I’d be sure about Ellie Goulding’s dress on the rack but the simple styling makes it work and she looks gorgeous, and Harry Styles looks just as pretty in a Gucci look that is MADE for him.

(L-R: Adwoah Aboah in Vivienne Westwood, Celeste in Gucci on the far right! I’m not sure who the guy in the middle is, I’m sorry and if anybody knows drop me a message and I will correct this immediately!)

Unfortunately, Harry Styles and Celeste didn’t get to pose together because this is really a perfect his and hers Gucci look; I feel like seeing one outfit next to the other would really highlight the quirky elegance of each. That being said, it feels criminal to talk about elegance without including Adwoah Aboah in Vivienne Westwood in the sentence; the dress is obviously stunning quality on its own merit, but Adwoah is what elevates it from unremarkable to ethereal. Fuck the weird ass knight figure that’s currently on top of the Brit Award, this woman is the definition of statuesque! Put her on top of the trophy you cowards!

And just to get it out of the way, when it comes to the guy in the middle, to quote Keke Palmer:

Sorry to this man.

Honestly, I saved all the red carpet photos from a Nylon (I think it was Nylon?) article back when the awards aired and towards the end of the photos they stopped including names-this happened a few times when I was looking through red carpet galleries. I reverse image searched where I could but not every photo turned anything up. If anyone does know who this man is, message me so I can include his name. He looks sick, and as far as suits go, this one is built upon and accessorised enough that it’s actually a look rather than the same old variation of a suit we’ve seen a million times before that may as well be the straight man’s designated red carpet uniform. 

(L-R: Maya Jama, Neh Neh Cherry in Bottega Veneta, Laura Whitmore)

And now the woman that forced me to include the Brits red carpet in this post in the first place: Maya Jama. Don’t get me wrong, my mind isn’t blown by this dress on its own, I probably prefer Laura Whitmore’s (Jaded do a similar newspaper dress and I’ve resisted adding it to my basket for 6 months now, this is the ultimate test of whether or not I finally cave), but Maya looks fucking MAGNIFICENT. The fit, the gloves, the confidence with which she carries it, it’s all SO good. Considering the timing, this is basically her Princess Diana revenge dress levelled up, 2020′s Jessica Rabbit moment. 

(L-R: Maya Jama, Ellie Goulding, Kendall Jenner)

Obviously anything is gonna be a step down from the red carpet look but Maya’s Brits afterparty outfit was cute too, if a tad Pretty Little Thing. 

Don’t ask me what Kendall Jenner was doing at the Brits afterparty btw, because I have no idea. We live in a world where the Kardashian-Jenners just seem to occupy every public space possible and I’ve begrudgingly accepted it at this point. I don’t have the energy to question it-and it helps that green catsuit is actually Very Cool™. 

For the last of my favourite Brit Awards looks, we have a few more afterparty photos-from left to right we have Charli XCX again, Lizzo, and Anne Marie. It was Charli posting her dress on Instagram that sent me searching for afterparty looks in the first place; apparently wearing nothing but feathers and crystals is something that appeals to me, and the more I read that statement, the more it sounds spot-on. I’d categorise it as gothic glamour hoe, and slot it in with the rest of the night-out clothes in my wardrobe that I think I’ll finally have the balls to wear out of sheer desperation once this lockdown is over. The Blossom to Charli XCX’s Buttercup here, we’ve also got Anne Marie looking extra AF and I loveeeee it; it’s an ensemble somewhere between a high-end version of Alaska Thunderfuck’s candyfloss Sugar Ball dress from season 5 of Drag Race (Alaska DID deserve to win AS2 nation, rise up) and a low-key version of a Katy Perry California Dreams Tour costume. I don’t call it low-key as a drag, just a regretful admission of the fact that maybe wearing a cupcake bra which squirts whipped cream out of the boobs is a bit too much for most of us. 

Critic’s Choice Awards

(L-R: Alison Brie in Brandon Maxwell, Chloe Bridges in Azeeza, Cynthia Erivo in Fendi, Florence Pugh in Prada)

I was going to say the Critic’s Choice Awards is kind of America’s version of the BAFTAs but then I remembered that the BAFTAs is really the only big TV and film awards ceremony we have here in the UK and that it’s kind of sad that I have to compare our most high-profile red carpet of the year to L.A’s most low-key one. Getting Cynthia Erivo and Florence Pugh to infiltrate is the best we can do. 

THAT BEING SAID! 

They both look amazing. This is Florence’s best red carpet look of this year, imo (she the prettiest icicle I’ve ever seen), and Cynthia Erivo’s arm must ache from serving the entire awards season. And in Fendi! Taste!

Side note before we move onto the next set of looks: has anybody else watched Alison Brie in Mad Men and Community simultaneously and experienced the extreme cognitive dissonance that comes from watching her play a tragically nerdy (relatable tbh) 18 year old and an overly-sophisticated 30 something married to an ad man in the 60s at the same time? Weird, but anyway! The orange dress with the red lipstick is channelling Marina Diamandis’ Froot era style subtle sex appeal and is a timeless, playful combo. Put the hair up into a beehive and it’s Megan Draper on a date in Cabo-don’t know much about the place but I know the sea is aqua and the sun seekers are blindingly white and the cocktails are plentiful (and whatever colour you want them to be), and all that together is a juicy palette if we’re talking��cinematography. The Mad Men directors are out there somewhere shaking their fists at the sky that they never got to consult me on that, I’m sure. 

(L-R: Phoebe Waller-Bridge in Dior, Saoirse Ronan in Erdem and Zendaya in Tom Ford)

Zendaya’s red carpet look was the stand out of the Critic’s Choice Awards for sure; the skirt I can do without but I hope that hot pink metal breastplate ends up on display somewhere because that is ART, and she is the perfect person to wear it. The Tiffany Pollard “she's so powerful” meme was made for this moment. 

Also, can we talk about Phoebe Waller-Bridge backing up my Dior 2019 Haute Couture wasn’t *that* bad hypothesis? Because unless I’m mistaken this is one of the dresses from that collection and it is quite beautiful. Yeah, black mesh isn’t going to start a revolution or anything but it’s so delicate looking it almost seems out of place on a red carpet-I don’t know if it’s the structure of the bodice or the tulle but I can totally see this in a gothic ballet, whether that’s sensible in theory or not. Probably not. But then again I did quit ballet when I was 10 after months of getting people to near poke me in the eye on the way out of class so it would look like I’d been crying and I didn’t have to go to my lessons after school. So what do I know? Fuck all, in case that wasn’t clear. I also feel a little vindicated by Saoirse wearing one of the Erdem dresses I loved from last year’s collection-if multi-award winning actress Saoirse Ronan’s probably ridiculously well-paid stylist liked it enough to pick it out for her then I guess I’m doing okay in terms of taste levels.

(L-R: Olivia Wilde in Valentino, Lucy Hale in Miu Miu, Mandy Moore in Elie Saab, and Margaret Qualley in Chanel)

The last few Critics Choice Awards looks I picked out above aren’t thrilling or anything but they’re cute enough to include-from left to right we have Olivia Wilde in Valentino, Lucy Hale in Miu Miu, Mandy Moore in Elie Saab and Margaret Qualley in Chanel. It’s kind of besides the point, but Margaret worked with Chanel throughout awards season and I just wanted to add my two cents in here and say that I think she’s the perfect person to collaborate with (also think Laura Harrier would be a good match, anyone agree?) and that in a similar vein, I urge Miu Miu, the creative directors of which I’m sure are eagerly awaiting the opinion of irrelevant Tumblr user amphtaminedreams, to work with Lucy Hale more often. I feel like if girl stopped starring in those shitty Blumhouse horrors and did something a bit more sophisticated she’d fit the brand right down to a T.

The Golden Globes

(L-R: Cynthia Erivo in Thom Browne, Dakota Fanning in Dior, Jane Levy in Steven Khalil, and Janina Gavankar in Georges Chakra)

Finally! I hear you cry! A more exciting red carpet! It’s not the Oscars, but celebrity stylists still pulled the big guns for this one, the Golden Globes probably being considered the second most prestigious American awards ceremony of the year. Plus Dakota Fanning was there! Big yay for me! She and Elle can practically do no wrong in my eyes and are probably the only 2 women that could take on Dakota Johnson and Jennifer Lawrence when it comes to established red carpet style. 

Cynthia Erivo did it again, of course, as slick, as dignified and as regal as she was at the Critic’s Choice. The woman really has got this power stance thing locked down; she always seems so cool and confident in everything she wears that the whole getting dressed up to go out out out (we call going to the club going “out out”, but I’d say a red carpet is a slightly bigger deal than my local club with the sticky floors hence the 3rd out) thing looks like second nature.

(L-R: Zoey Deutch in Fendi, Karamo Brown in Grayscale, Lucy Boynton in Louis Vuitton and Kat Graham in Georges Hobeika)

Lucy Boynton was another of my Golden Globes stand outs, and in general is someone who I really look forward to seeing at red carpet events. She (or her stylist, I don’t know how much of a role she plays!) always seems to commit fully to an outfit and sees it as part of a whole concept where the makeup, hair and accessories are equally as important and that is a girl after my own heart. 60s space age empress is the theme here and I’m all about it-well, either that or a feminine editorial take on the tinman from the Wizard of Oz but the former sounds a bit cooler and does way more justice to how good she looks so we’ll go with that. Quick shoutout to Kat Graham too because she looked absolutely radiant. 

(L-R: Shailene Woodley in Balmain, Winnie Harlow in Laquan Smith, and Zoe Kravitz in Saint Laurent)

The trio above I really couldn’t skim over, Winnie Harlow especially; my America’s Next Top Model grudges aside, she consistently turns it out at every event she’s invited to. She’s another woman that wears pieces with such confidence that they look like they were actually made on her body-even if the garment itself isn’t the most breathtaking in the room, she’s the one that draws my attention. Though she’s got these dainty, other-worldly qualities about her, what you’d expect to be a gentle presence is firm and commanding and whilst the sharp drama and glitz of the dress probably helps, that’s just the way Winnie Harlow is naturally, based on her other red carpet appearances. 

Zoe Kravitz is an interesting one because, on the one hand, her looking amazing with that bone structure (I would trade a vital organ to look like that any day) is a given, but it does also seem like she went out of her way to do something a bit different this past awards season. I have always loved her street style for its trademark edge and the androgynous, oversized silhouettes that she leans towards, and the overt femininity of her red carpet dresses is that grungy, skater girl aesthetic completely flipped on its head. It’s cute, and if anyone can pull a dress as kitschy as this off, it’s Zoe. She’s got that just rolled out of bed look we all dream of that screams “I’m over this shit” whereas the rest of us have to rely on dark circles to get the message across. It’s very weird to think that she and Shailene Woodley were in Divergent together, especially since Zoe in particular has changed so much since. 

My main note with Shailene was just that I got excited to see that Balmain dress off the runway-it was one of my favourites from the S/S 2020 collection (IIRC, mostly on the basis that I’m pretty sure it wan’t haute couture), and it looks good! Not wildly good because I’m not sure the fit of the dress is inherently all that flattering, but still good-she makes it work.

(L-R: Taylor Swift in Etro, Sofia Carson in Giambattista Valli and Scarlett Johansson in Vera Wang)

I know a lot of people online didn’t seem to like Taylor Swift’s dress, but she looks cute, imo. I will say that I’m surprised it’s Etro! At first glance I would’ve thought Carolina Herrera or Oscar de la Renta or something along those lines. And predictably, I think Sofia Carson looks flawless. If you’ve read any of my other posts you’re probably sick of hearing it but I really can’t resist anything that is this modern Disney princess, like powder pink layered tulle? Feathers? What did you expect me to say, ew? I think deep down my clothing preferences will always be that of a 9 year old girl and you know what, that’s okay. Sometimes. Well, when it comes to red carpets. That’s when you can kinda get away with it.

(L-R: Bell Powley in Miu Miu, Billy Porter in Alex Vinash, and Charlize Theron in Dior)

There’s a few things worth mentioning when it comes to the above outfits. Firstly, and most importantly, I need to proclaim my love for Billy Porter. No man is doing it like him, honestly. To compare Harry Styles in his pink suits is unfair. The drama and the beauty and the flair that Billy brings every awards ceremony is on another level and that’s all I have to say about that. If you disagree, I’m gonna need a bullet pointed essay-I am that firm in my opinion.

Second, Bell Powley in Miu Miu semi confirms the direction their PR team tend to head in when choosing women to work with. I might be totally alone here but I feel like she and Lucy Hale both have one of those porcelain doll faces which work really well with Miu Miu’s signature girlish silhouettes and overly-ornate details. 

And thirdly, just to restate my earlier point: someone give Charlize Theron a pat on the back for bringing some life to a Dior design. That is all.

(L-R: Jodie Comer in Mary Katrantzou, Joey King in Schiaparelli and Kaitlyn Dever in Valentino)

All the newcomers really turned it out too, which is a sentence I type through gritted teeth; to call Jodie Comer of My Mad Fat Diary origins a newcomer pains the former depressing 2013 black and white Tumblr user in me, though I suppose to the US audiences uncultured in the ways of British teenage angst Vilanelle is her breakthrough role. And how Vilanelle is this dress too!? It’s bold and it’s attention-grabbing and it’s fun and it is definitely very theatrical female fictional villain that you were inexplicably drawn to as a child before you realised why as an adult-”oh, it’s because she was hot”. 

Joey King in Iris van Herpen was a pleasant surprise too considering that when I first looked through the red carpet photos I only knew her as the girl who was in that shitty Netflix original-having watched her in The Act, I apologise for the dismissal! And I admire the sartorial choice! I adore Iris van Herpen designs but as a short girl, wearing one of her dresses to a red carpet event is a risky decision-I hate to admit it because casting a diverse range of people for shows is something I have come to expect of my favourite brands, but the appeal of a lot of IvH pieces comes from the movement of the garments on standard willowy runway models. Fortunately, the styling is really complementary here, and whilst it can’t be denied that the dress itself does swamp her a bit, I liked that she and her stylist stepped out of the box. 

Kaitlyn Dever’s red carpet look is obviously a lot more typical, but you can't go wrong with a Valentino dress, and this one in particular is so suited to the aura she gives off-it’s young and it’s fun and it’s fresh and the intricate floral print, otherwise muted if not for the spring influenced pops of pink and red, is timelessly pretty.

(L-R: Akwafina in Dior, Saoirse Ronan in Celine, Beanie Feldstein in Oscar de la Renta, and Renee Zellweger in Armani)

Lastly, there was Saoirse Ronan in Celine-one of my highlights of the night; she looked phenomenal, a glacial toned dream, and it was pretty different to what I generally expect to see her in. I might be way off base and in need of a bit of a review of her red carpet style, but I feel like she usually leans more towards pretty than edgy with regards to her styling at these kinds of events and a loose fitting, gun metal glittered slip dress is, imo, the perfect way to hit that previously uncharted midway point between the two.

(L-R: Kate Bosworth in Prabal Gurung, Kathryn Newton in Valentino and Sarah Hyland)

Now onto the afterparty looks, and I’m not gonna lie, they’re usually the highlight of the ceremonies for me; I feel like the initial ceremony is all about looking respectful and maintaining that whole dedicated actor image, whereas it seems the literal point of these showbiz parties is a competition to be the best dressed person in the room. Competition really makes people step their game up, and we always get to see more young talent whose style tends to be more current than that of the people we see on the red carpet. 

I’ve got to say, as annoying as I found her character in The Society, I have to overlook that gut instinct of irritation when I see Kathryn Newton and accept how stunning everything going on here is; honestly, she looks like an angel, and I feel like the team at Valentino must reeeeally like her to put her in that dress.

(L-R: Alexa Demie, Ashley Benson in Georges Hobeika, Maude Apatow and Barbie Ferreira)

Obviously I was super excited to see the Euphoria girls on the red carpet, especially Alexa Demie-she does 90s/early noughties inspired glamour better than anyone else on the young actor scene right now and her personal style and the sass she does so well as Maddy Perez shines through every time. Whilst Barbie Ferreira’s look is more casual and achievable for the rest of us in terms of wearability, it’s just as interesting a take on the same period; the delicate pink makeup, hair and jewellery with the 90s inspired slip dress in light teal is a red carpet take on soft grunge for the ages. As for Ashley Benson, she always looks gorgeous and that’s all I’m gonna say before I get emotional and start going into a rant about how her and Cara Delevigne’s relationship was one of the only good things about this shitshow of a year and how now that they’ve broken up the single flame of hope inside me has been extinguished and how their sex swing is gonna get so lonely with them caught in the middle of an ugly custody battle and-

You get the idea.

(L-R: Storm Reid, Sophia Bush in John Paul Ataker, and Sydney Sweeney)

(L-R: Billie Lourd, Paris Hilton, and Camila Morrone)

The Oscars

(L-R: Charlize Theron in Dior, Cynthia Erivo, and Florence Pugh in Louis Vuitton)

Ah, the Oscars. This is where the big money is really spent, and bad decisions are made-in fairness, this year’s winners were a lot more satisfying than usual and I think all of us felt that Parasite was a well-deserved win. I really thought it was gonna be Once Upon a Time in Hollywood just as a bit of a token gesture to Tarantino considering it’s his 9th film, though undoubtedly his worst of the ones I’ve seen, so I was relieved that this wasn’t the case. That being said, it still pains me to see the horror genre being ignored by the academy-in my mind, Florence is here for her performance in Midsommar just as much as Little Women. 

At the risk of getting repetitive, just assume my opinions on Charlize Theron in Dior here are the same again, that Cynthia Erivo is still bringing goddess energy (this is probably my favourite of her looks), and that against the opinion of the masses, Florence looks divine in this colour. I mean, when I say the masses I just mean the people I follow on Twitter, but still, I just wanted be an excuse to be dramatic so that I could insert a meme.

(L-R: Natalie Portman in Dior, Regina King in Versace, Scarlett Johansson in Oscar de la Renta, and Sandra Oh in Elie Saab)

Once again, Scarlett Johansson’s stylist is doing God’s work; this outfit is everythingggg-the Oscar de la Renta dress is probably my favourite thus far. Like we’re talking angel, but make it fitted and sexy, and I hope you read that in the Tyra Banks voice I intended because 2 memes in a row would rob me of any credibility I’m building as a fashion account and I’m not ready to trash that for bad memes just yet; give it a couple of mental breakdowns and I’ll be there. Natalie Portman’s look was a favourite of mine too, with the cape over the top adding a sophisticated touch to the celestial, slightly bohemian feel of the dress. I initially found the detail of the names embroidered into said cape to be quite moving-in a dream world, directing would be my career of choice and so I really admired the statement-but finding out that Portman herself is the only director hired by her own production company ruined that for me a little bit. Then again, multi-millionaire celebrities making performative gestures for good publicity and not doing all that much to make any real change? Colour me shocked.

(L-R: Beanie Feldstein in Miu Miu, Brie Larson in Celine and Billie Eilish in Chanel)

Now, of all the Miu Miu looks so far, I think Beanie Feldstein definitely got the best one. The intricacy of the embroidery, the silhouette, the old Hollywood stye curls-it’s all so graceful. I’d say this is probably her best look of awards season and she and her stylist did a really great job.

And as for Billie Eilish...Guys...do you think she might be wearing...Chanel...by any chance? I’m not sure.

Seriously though, as far as an oversized tweed suit with the brand’s logo emblazoned all over it goes, I like this look. The acid green roots and the jewellery are what make it for me, adding to the grunginess of the outfit which is interesting against Chanel’s prim and proper aesthetic of the last few years. I know she has good reason for the way she dresses, but I’ve never quite been able to appreciate it-this outfit proves to me that her style doesn't automatically equal ugly and occasionally, she can make it work.

(L-R: Leona Lewis, Colton Haynes, Dita von Teese)

Elton John’s Oscars afterparty being the less exciting of the two big ones in terms of fashion-the other being the Vanity Fair afterparty which I’ll cover in a moment-I thought I’d whizz through it (posturing aside though, I bet Sir Elton’s party was a lot more fun).

(L-R: Chiara Ferragni, Donatella Versace, Bella Thorne)

This is a big statement considering Alexa Demie attended, but I think Chiara’s outfit and overall styling might be my favourite of the partygoers; if they decided to do a live action Barbie film in 2020 minus the PG ratio-because lets be real, she’d be a noughties Paris Hilton type and get up to some SHENANIGANS-this is the look that would become iconic. 

(L-R: Ashley Greene in Off-White, Alexa Demie, Sydney Sweeney, Annalynne McCord)

It was a hard decision to make though: I’m just as into Sydney Sweeney’s interpretation of burlesque come 1950s red carpet Barbie, Ashley Greene’s surprisingly delicate Off-White number, and Alexa’s dress and (as always) impeccable styling. That being said, Chiara’s clearest contender here for the best dressed of the night is Annalynne McCord. I know I'm one to throw similes around but she looks like an ACTUAL Disney princess-the dress is magical and an absolutely flawless fit. She carries it with such grace. I'm truly in love.

(L-R: Tessa Thompson in Versace, Vanessa Hudgens in Vera Wang, SZA)

As for the Vanity Fair Oscars afterparty, there were SO many iconic moments this year. SZA was the definition of the fire emoji, Tessa Thompson’s throwback Versace was the mermaid’s take on BDSM fashion I never knew I need to see, and I’d die to turn up to my graduation ceremony (here’s hoping for a successful attempt at the old uni shebang this time, lol) looking as elegant and simultaneously extra as Vanessa Hudgens did in Vera Wang. I mean, this was before Vanessa went on her dumb Instagram live corona rant because she was upset she couldn’t go to Coachella and I still kinda lived for her, mostly because of moments like this. She’s always been the queen of channelling a more hedonistic, carefree era and this dress is the most refined example of that boho decadence yet. It sounds dramatic to say but the rich purple is such a bold choice considering it’s a a colour we rarely see on the red carpet but now I’ve seen eggplant coloured silk I need it, lol. 

(L-R: Suki Waterhouse in Fendi, Lili Reinhart in Marc Jacobs, Lucy Boynton and Margaret Qualley in Chanel)

Then there was Suki, Lilly, Lucy and Margaret as well who all went full angel mode in some of my favourite runway looks of last summer’s haute couture week; Suki’s Fendi dress and Lili’s Marc Jacobs number were highlights of both their shows and there’s something even more magical about them both when the uniformity of the runway is removed. I also would go on about how much I love Lucy Boynton’s style for the millionth time but I think you get my point.

(L-R: Nicole Richie, Cynthia Erivo, Hunter Schafer, Billie Porter)

The more I look at the photos I saved from the Vanity Fair “red” carpet, the more I come to the firm conclusion that these looks are my favourite as a collective. Along with the elegance and sex appeal of the outfits above, we’ve got all these looks too which are so VIBRANT and fun and experimental. Billie Porter is absolutely majestic and continues his reign as the king of in-your-face, theatrical red carpet style, and Hunter and Cynthia look so radiant. Whilst Nicole’s look isn’t as colourful, she still brought drama with the satin gloves and the smoke lined eyes, and she is definitely ready to step on someone’s neck here.

(L-R: Halima Aden, Ella Balinska in Schiaparelli, Emma Roberts, Ciara)

(L-R: Kiki Layne in Michael Kors, Kim Kardashian in Alexander McQueen, Kylie Jenner in Ralph and Russo, Lashana Lynch in Michael Kors)

(L-R: Rowan Blanchard in Iris van Herpen, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Stella Maxwell, and Sarah Paulson with Holland Taylor)

I’ve got to say, it’s really cool to see Rowan Blanchard in Iris van Herpen too; it’s interesting that as far as I know, she and Joey King were the only ones to wear her this awards season, both being up and coming actresses. It would be a good choice for the brand, probably best known for its futuristic, conceptual aesthetic, to also focus its PR efforts on the young potential inheriting that future. Orrrr it could just be that Rowan, Joey and I have the same (good, lol) taste-not gonna lie, from my experience of stalking her instagram Rowan Blanchard does make some unique fashion choices and her feed is full of bold outfit inspiration.

(L-R: Adriana Lima in Ralph and Russo, Alessandra Ambrosio in Armani, Billie Eilish in Gucci, and Donatella Versace in Versace)

Then there’s Billie Eilish, who is really on another level. This is her second custom made baggy suit of the night, this time Gucci. IMAGINE. Chanel and Gucci making custom pieces to suit your very specific style. Again, though, I really like this; whilst it’s very clearly a Billie outfit, it’s got a level of sophistication, cohesiveness and glamour to it that takes it to that I can admire. 

(L-R: Camila Mendes in Moschino, Barbara Palvin and Dylan Sprouse, and Chiara Ferragni)

Honestly, the Vanity Fair red carpet really belonged to young talent this year, and Camila Mendes in one of my favourite Moschino looks from the Picasso collection really seals it. She could’ve just gone for a basic pretty dress-this isn’t a natural choice-but she really does have the proud, regal look of a woman who knows some man is gonna paint her a portrait that will end up in a famous gallery one day. 

One last thing before I move on, though. How the fuck does Chiara Ferragni get everywhere?! And by that I don’t mean how does she get invited, I had the shock of finding out this woman I followed on Instagram because I liked her outfits and thought she was pretty is a hugely successful businesswoman in Italy long ago. Power to her. She’s a big deal! I get it! I just mean, physically HOW? How do you hit Elton John’s party AND the Vanity Fair party in one night and look this good? God really does have favourites, huh. Well, I guess in this hypothetical scenario where I believe in him anyway. 

The SAG Awards

(L-R: Dakota Fanning in Valentino, Kaitlyn Dever in Ralph Lauren, Scarlett Johansson in Armani, and Zoe Kravitz in Oscar de la Renta)

So, I kinda forgot the SAG awards existed and thought that my post was basically finished before I looked in my folder and saw the one dedicated to this ceremony. My initial reaction was like “oh, this is the shitty Oscars, right?” and I assumed the red carpet would be shit and that I could call it a night-it’s 3:30am, I wish I was calling it a night-but then I looked and saw that I had even more outfit photos saved in that folder than I did for my Oscar dedicated one. Because fuck, I want to to sleep, but the SAG awards had a surprisingly good turn out?! So maybe not as irrelevant a ceremony as I thought? Because Dakota Fanning turned up looking like some divine mythical being again, Scarlett Johansson pulled another incredible look out the bag, Zoe Kravitz was a modernised Audrey Hepburn, and Kaitlyn Dever read my comments about her dress being “timelessly pretty” and said “bitch, you really thought” before showing up looking hot as fuck. Truth be told, I think the SAG awards were first but in this universe where Kaitlyn Dever would pay any attention to my opinion of her outfit do we really care? 

(L-R: America Ferrera, Andrew Scott in Azzaro Couture, Camila Mendes in Ralph and Russo, Caleb McLaughlin )

(L-R: Lupita Nyongo in Louis Vuitton, Lily Allen, Nathalie Emmanuel in Miu Miu, Cynthia Erivo in Schiaparelli)

See, I was going to make a comment above how I took back what I said about Camila Mendes not just going for pretty dresses (which I guess I just did here instead-JUST TO BE CLEAR SHE STILL LOOKS STUNNING) and then I uploaded the next photo set and got distracted by 2 things:

1. How weird it is that British legend Lily Allen, who does not get NEAR enough credit for her smart her songs were might I add, is dating David Harbour AKA. Hopper off Stranger Things!?

2. How mad I still am about Game of Thrones and how dirty the writers did Nathalie Emmanuel (and Emilia Clarke and Lena Heady and Nikolaj Coster-Waldau and basically everyone else on that show but that’s another story).

In this same universe where Kaitlyn Dever cares about my opinion can we make the issues I have in the last bullet point not exist? Please?

(L-R: Sophie Turner in Louis Vuitton, Renee Zellweger in Maison Margiela, Phoebe Waller-Bridge in Armani, and Renee Bargh)

(L-R: Gwendoline Christie in Rick Owens, Madeline Brewer in Monique Lhuillier, Kathryn Newton in Valentino, and Lili Reinhart in Miu Miu)

Finishing off the SAG looks, we’ve got the four above. 

Once again, Kathryn Newton was Valentino’s blushing crown jewell; Allie Pressman hate aside, she really is the perfect dressing up doll for the brand. Fresh faced and poised, she has all the elegance and gentle femininity necessary to make floating down the runway as Valentino models do look natural, and Lili Reinhart did an equally good job being a Miu Miu girl. She makes that idiosyncratic cutesy-ness work, all the frills and fragility of a china tea set look easy where I’d just look like I’d been consumed by a charity shop doily. Madeline Brewer did a good job too, helping a Monique Lhuillier design pop in a way that it doesn’t usually. When your hair is bright red and your dress cerulean blue, coral tinted lipstick is a *ahem* choice, buuut in this case it paid off because the result is a look which demanded my attention-ML dresses are reliably pretty, however, they tend to be predictable. Madeline and her styling did a good job subverting that formula. To end the section, though, I feel it’s only fair to save my fave woman til last-probably one of the few people in the world that isn’t a Rick Owens model that can pull off his designs. Ofc, I’m talking about the queen that is Gwendoline Christie. If we’re talking embodying brands, she did justice like nobody else could to the spectacle of Owens’ formidable, out-of-this-world aesthetic. This is her version of the princess moment, and when you’re as striking as she is, nothing less would do. 

At least my girl Brienne of Tarth is thriving<3

The Grammys

(L-R: Ariana Grande in Giambattista Valli, Cardi B in Mugler, and Pia Mia in Julien Macdonald)

TBH, like I said with the Brits, I never planned to do any music award ceremony red carpets, just because I feel like the fashion tends to be more geared towards a younger audience buuuut I’m kinda glad I changed because Ariana looks INCREDIBLE. MESMERISING. TRANSCENDENT. JFC. There’s a reason the photo of her on her Wiki page has been changed to one from this night and it’s because she looks absolutely exquisite, like some kind of moon goddess with an R&B touch which I suppose is kind of her brand? Sometimes I go kind of lukewarm on Giambattista Valli and forget how mystical but at the same time frothy and indulgent and all around luxurious the pieces can be. This is a cupcake of a dress and I want to eat it. Cardi B has become a bit of an unexpected fashion icon and Pia Mia looks as hot-party-girl as ever but I feel to put anyone next to Ariana in this dress seems harsh because she just completely stole the show and I don’t even know if she won any Grammys.

(L-R: Josephine Relli, Gwen Stefani, Jameela Jamil in Georges Chakra, and Chrissy Teigen in Yanina Couture)

Other than Ariana, I’m not gonna lie, there was nothing wildly exciting, BUT I did think there were some beautiful colours out on the runway-plus for all her occasionally bad takes I really like what Jameela Jamil stands for and her style has always been very quirky cool. The electric blue tiled effect with the black mesh underneath kinda reminds me of a peacock, and contrasts wonderfully with the carpet-it’s very reminiscent of her T4 days. She’s one of those people that seems to get aggression directed at her that’s completely disproportionate to whatever it is she’s supposed to have done; sometimes the way she goes about saying things is wrong but the intention behind what she’s saying is usually good. Then again, the internet still despises Chrissy Teigen (in a way that’s kind of excessive considering what we seem to collectively let some people get away with) for a dumb AirPods tweet and I’ve included her too. THIS IS NOT A POLITICAL STATEMENT, this time anyway. I just think she looks good!

If I’m going to get controversial about anything, it’ll be Gwen Stefani. She looks stunning, the dress is stunning, and the boots are stunning. The outfit is not my problem! My problem is how she seems not to have aged at all. This woman is 50 years old! That she drank the blood of her Harajuku girls is the only explanation here. Can you imagine if she tried to pull that shit today? She’d get rightly accused of being a culturally appropriating weeb in about 10 seconds flat and we’d have to pretend to stop liking Cool and Hollaback Girl. 

(L-R: Finneas O’Connell in Gucci, Lucky Daye, and Shaun Ross)

(L-R: Tess Holliday, Dua Lipa in Alexander Wang, Tyler the Creator, and Grace Elizabeth in Giuseppe di Morabito)

Back to what I’m supposed to be talking about in this blog post: the fashion. And here, most importantly, Tyler the Creator looking like a cast member of the Grand Budapest Hotel. IDK why. But I love this man.

(L-R: Lil Nas X in Versace, Lizzo in Versace, and Shawn Mendes in Louis Vuitton)

(L-R: Billie Porter, FKA Twigs in Ed Marler, and Swae Lee in Giuseppe Zanotti)

See in general, the men were a lot more interesting on the Grammys red carpet. With the exception of Twigs, Dua and obviously Ariana, the men’s outfits are a lot more memorable; Billie Porter became the most fashionable meme on the internet, for god’s sake. And even when their outfits weren’t extravagant, they were just more interesting, imo, which is a rare occurrence. I didn’t expect Finneas O’Connell to be the writing half of Billie Eilish (the other half being Billie herself) I cared about and yet, in that Gucci blazer, here we are. 

(L-R: Jessie J, Hailee Steinfeld, and Madison Beer)

(L-R: H.E.R, Usher, FKA Twigs, and Matt Shultz)

Of the afterparty looks, my favourites are what we can see of these more casual outfits-I love what F.K.A Twigs and H.E.R are wearing, the headscarf with the leatherjacket on top is in particular very throwback rockabilly, and I’m even into whatever it is Usher’s got on.

(L-R: Olivia O’Brien, Amine, and Alrissa)

(L-R: Salem Mitchell, Machine Gun Kelly, and Sydney Sweeney)

Now, how to round this all up!? How to relate the confusingly persistent but very welcome presence of Sydney Sweeney on, like, ALL these red carpets back to the MET!?

IDEK. It’s been a long year. 

The Met Gala has usually come and gone before we know it, but with everything going on, it’s been the longest January-May I think most of us have ever known. I keep going on about COVID-19 in all my posts now but I have almost forgotten how to write an intro and outro because the pandemic is pretty much consistently on the brain and unless I have something right in front of me to use as a distraction, my mind tends to wander off into a very anxious place. I think, like many others, I feel frustrated and disappointed and angry with the way the situation is being handled by the people who are supposed to protect their citizens, and by how much of a fight some are putting up against measures that are in place to try and save lives. The point of this ramble, I guess, is that whilst we should never forget what’s going on and do the best we can to help prevent the spread of the virus, it’s okay to still care about mundane shit. Was this post one big long distraction for me? Probably. But if there’s something harmless you can do to keep your anxiety at bay, don’t feel bad for doing it. Contrary to popular belief, you can care about more than one thing at once. You can be sad that something you were looking forward to has been cancelled whilst still being sad for the people who are suffering because they’ve lost love ones or who have been forced into precarious living conditions. If talking about clothes on the internet is going to help you get through this pandemic, power to you.

If anyone has read til the end, thank you! I hope you are well! As always, feel free to reply to the post or inbox me with your thoughts! It doesn’t even have to be related to this post. If you’re struggling with everything going on, feel free to reach out too. I spend too much time on the internet anyway, lol! My plans are to finish my fashion week reviews and then I have a Lana Del Rey albums inspired lookbook which I pinched off the stans on Twitter (who I will of course credit when I write it!). For the time being, look after yourselves!

Lauren x

[msbeccieboo]

Arrow 8x01 Brain Dump

So that was....awesome! I’m in shock! Obviously there was a gaping chasm where our precious cupcake used to be, but that’s gonna be the new normal for this last run, so I’m gonna try to not dwell on that too much in these last few reviews. And apparently these aren’t getting any shorter, even without Felicity...

Oliver Jonas Queen: Paragon and bestest hero everrrr (suck it, Larry)

Our beautiful boy 😭😭😭 kicking the episode off with stunning recreations of the very beginnings of the show, first on Lian Yu, then returning to Moira was just *chef kiss*. 

That Oliver is now able to relive these moments, really feeling the feelings and speaking the words that he was previously too broken to, upon his real return from the island, and expressing them to both himself and to those people he can no longer see in his reality, is just heart-breaking and tear-inducing and beautiful and satisfying and all of the feelings. He worked his arse of to get here and to experience it and he fucking well deserves it. Ugh I just made myself cry haha. 

More under the cut...

Stephen’s acting was a beautiful thing to watch in this episode. Oliver’s scenes with all the returning guests were just so perfect; his emotions over seeing Tommy and Moira again 😭, then not-Felicity 😍💔 then Adrian 😂 were all perfect. The scene where he was trying to seek advice or validation from Moira over leaving his family for this mission (even though he couldn’t reveal why) was just heart-breaking. Then when he breaks down (along with us!) and tells Moira he’s sorry, it’s almost like he’s doubly apologising; to Moira for not better understanding her, now that he is a parent himself, and to Felicity, William and Mia, for having to leave them behind.

It was so sad seeing Oliver doubting himself throughout the episode. He tells Diggle that Earth 2 has so many more people alive without him having been there, and then when Moira astutely observes that he is a better man now than before he went on the Gambit, he replies he’s not so sure. How can he still not see this yet?? He’s clearly been away from Felicity for too long! By the end of the episode he seems to be making some headway, at least in realising that he doesn’t need to face this crisis alone, when he delivers an EPIC SPEECH to Tommy “because were only as good as the people in our lives. Every one of those losses brings with it a choice between darkness and light. Make the right choice.” YES MY BOY!!!  I’m totally here for this whole season of Oliver going to other Earths, realising how awesome he is, then imparting this wisdom on everyone by delivering rousing speeches!! The Monitor said it himself in his voice-over, referring to Oliver “the highest [form of heroes] belong to those known as the paragons and they are the only hope of all creation.” YAAAASSSSS!!!! SUCK BALLS LARRY AND LARA!!!

Felicity/Olicity

Just because she’s not there, doesn’t mean she’ll be forgotten! I’m honestly so pleased that the show isn’t going to pretend Felicity doesn’t exist just because Emily left. Her absence is palpable, so the mentions and nods to her character throughout the episode (and the rest of the season, it seems) are very much welcomed!

The fake-out Felicity scene was beautifully done! From Oliver’s initially excited face and “it’s supposed to be red” 😭😭, his “good for her” when he found out that E2 Felicity is a badass mogul, to the OLICITY LOVE FERN on not-Felicity’s desk!!! Perfection!! 

Source: eloquence-of-felicities

Ugh and the scene with Oliver staring lovingly at Felicity and Mia’s photo...HFDSKGHFKJGHDSFKS NOT OK!!! 😭😭😭😭

Source: olicitygifs

Diggle

The Diggle ‘reveal’ was nostalgic perfection:

My live reaction 😂😂

Can I just say that I loved that he’d spoken with Felicity about Oliver, and gone after him. OTA for life!! I’d hoped that that would be the case, but you never can tell with these writers in recent seasons 😬 Dig is a master at advice-giving, and getting Oliver to see the big picture. Oliver needs a friend in this endeavour, and neither Felicity nor Dig would have him doing it alone. Dig’s purpose throughout the whole episode was pretty much to tell Oliver that he’s not alone, his death is not necessarily unavoidable, that he NEEDS TO ACCEPT FRACKING HELP (”that’s the thing about being brothers; you never, ever have to ask”😭😭), and that the whole reason that E2 has gone to crap was because Oliver was not there to protect it! 

In John Thomas Diggle we stan.  

FTA

Our FTA babies were back, and in the lair!! AHKASFHDSDAKF!!!  I loved the power struggle, with the team trying to find the right dynamic, before finally deciding to just make the Olicity baby the leader (duh), or moreover, Mia demanding that things be done her way from now on (apples, falling, tree?). 

Source: oliverxfelicity

William’s little comedic moments just popped. 

Source: olicitygifs

And then his delivery of a Felicity-worthy pep-talk to Mia had me falling infinitesimally more in love with him. This is the spin-off team we need to see!!

We finally met JJ Diggle who appears to be irredeemably (not likely) evil, and very handsome to boot, leading the Deathstroke Crew (baby Sara would have NEVER 😒😒). I was hoping for some Old Man Diggle, but alas we were not so lucky this week.  Much as I actually LOVE the flash-forwards, I did feel like they were a little shoehorned in in this episode. There was so much to unpack in the present story, that I kind of just wanted that to continue? 

Special Guests

From Moira’s first words I was crying.

Susanna Thompson continues to be outstanding as Moira, I love her! E2 Moira married Malcolm Merlyn, meaning we got John Barrowman back 😍😍, in a non-evil role (YAAASSSS!). Although there was no mention of Robert, given that we know on this Earth he returned from Lian Yu, and was later unmasked as the Green Arrow?? Anyway, this new Queen-Merlyn union officially made Oliver and Tommy brothers 😭😭 Oh btw.....TOOOOOMMMYYYYYYY!!!!!!!! AGSHAGFKJSAGFJKAG!!! Back, alive and kicking (literally) and gorgeous as ever. Ugh I just adore my Merlyn men 😍😍😍😍

Source: feilcityqueen

Tommy turning out to be the Dark Archer on this earth is all we had ever wanted to see!! Evil!Tommy is a thing of beautiful fanfiction dreams!! (I also lolled at the OTT, campy, cowering Malcolm, as Oliver realised it wasn’t him!) Not to mention this scene, that re-lit our Toliver flames in the most perfect way 🔥🔥

This moment was so good that I can just about forgive Oliver’s historically inaccurate non-shirtless state 😒😒 (strike 1)

In trying to track down the dwarf star shizzle at Queen-Merlyn Enterprises👀 , Oliver stumbles across the E2 GA who turns out to be ADRIAN CHASE!!  YAAASSSS!!!! It was great to have him back, in the growly S1 Oliver-esque fashion! E2 GA also enjoys the salmon ladder....Stephen really played us all when he told us that we’d see the salmon ladder in episode 1 😡😡 (strike 2 Steve, you’re on your last warning!) I loved Oliver’s little inside joke with himself when he said to Adrian “maybe I’m just 10 steps ahead of you” lolololol!!

Thea OD’d on Vertigo and passed away on E2, which was sad, but meaningful, as it spear-headed Tommy’s war on The Glades, much like Rebecca’s murder did for Malcolm on Earth 1. (Psst, it’s ok though, our Speedy’s back in a few weeks).

Superfluous Cast

Rene and Dinah remain disloyal rats on this Earth, and with no Oliver to mentor them, they turn out evil as well as incompetent and we got to see them taken into custody at the end of the episode...wah-wah-wahhh!! I would definitely be happy with this nice small amount of relevance/screen time for them moving forwards, please and thank you. Let’s let our boys shine for the last few outings!

Black Siren’s presence in the episode was thankfully small, and although she was saved in the end, presumably to go on to help Oliver and Dig (she kinda owes them now), I’m hoping that we continue with this minimal exposure, because, as much as I enjoyed her last season, with no Felicity to make her likeable, I’m not feeling her. I also laughed for a disproportionately long amount of time that her ‘iconic’ Pretty Bird moment that we all heard about beforehand came from Adrian, not her ‘Ollie’ 😂😂

That ending

Following on from the press previews and interviews leading up to the episode, there were comments along the lines of Oliver suffering a devastating loss, and that the Arrowverse would never be the same etc etc, regarding the end of the episode. Well...I have to say I just wasn’t as ‘shooketh’ or as moved by the ending as the previews implied I would be 😬 I mean of course the ending was awful; a whole Earth was erased, and Oliver having to see Moira/Tommy die at the end (especially after managing to redeem Tommy) must have been devastating for him in the moment, but the thing is, I’m not all that invested in Earth 2, so the magnitude of it didn’t really affect me that much. Maybe I’m just a cold-hearted bitch my heart has simply been irrevocably broken by 7x22. Anyway, I’m sure Oliver will be back and fighting fit again next week 😂

When MG, Beth and even Stephen had been throwing around the dreaded term ‘love letter to the fans’ I was more than scared about this season 😬 but the episode really did play out that way in my eyes, something I’m hoping that they are able to continue over the few remaining episodes. So yes, I lost my shit and (begrudgingly) loved this episode 😂😂 It was easier to deal with the lack of Felicity when they had thrown the (brand new, super high-spec) kitchen sink of guest stars at the episode. So it will be interesting to see how we fare over the next few episodes, where the guest stars won’t be such scene-stealers.

Thank you to the amazing gif-makers 💗💗💗 It’s so wonderful to see beautiful new scenes again! Any uncredited gifs are mine.

[side-effect-of-the-meds]

Erin and Ania are like holy fuck I can’t even. But for real Neil sees Abby as a mother figure in the book so like is it the same for Ania? Andrew too? Idek I just need to know their relationships with everyone

It’s time I map out their relationships anyways lol so thanks, love!

Let’s start with the lovely Ania 

Dan, Allison, and Ania are roommates. It’s tough after Seth’s death bc Ania has to face her all the time. Erin tells Allison her theory too so Allison is avoiding Ania so :////

Dan is essentially what Matt was to Neil. She sees Ania and her first thought is ‘baby’. She adopts her so fast. Every morning before class, she’ll pinch Ania’s cheeks and kiss her fingers, chef-style Idk man. It’s just something my mom does to me ok. Let me be soft. 

Renee rooms with Erin so Ania isn’t comfortable with her. Anyone that can spend the night in a room with that girl has to be hardcore. 

Allison also gives Ania a lot of shit about her wardrobe. At some point it starts to get to her so when the monsters head to the mall, Erin catches Ania drifting towards the girl’s section on her own. She’s high so she follows her around, prodding her about it. When Ania tells her, there’s this moment where Erin’s drug haze parts for a second. Ania could have sworn that she saw anger flashing in Erin’s eyes for half a second. She shrugs it off until Allison shows up at the dorms with a bruise on her jaw. Erin knows Ania hides her body bc scars and bc she doesn’t like men staring at her. She refuses to let Allison shame Ania into doing something she doesn’t want to. In general, Allison and Ania have a rocky relationship because Erin keeps interfering. After Christmas, the two of them end up getting along a lot better bc they bond while Allison covers Ania’s bruises with makeup. Also after Christmas, Ania and Renee trade dorms so she and Allison aren’t in constant contact. Part of their friction was due to the amount of time they spent together. A lot of things have happened to Allison this year and the fact that she constantly has to see the source of a lot of her problems makes it hard for her to heal.  

I’ve considered Fem!Nicky but I personally prefer Gay/Lesbian solidarity between him and Erin a lot better so yeah (However if you want me to run a few Fem!Nicky hcs, hmu and I’ll do it. She won’t be a part of the fem!verse but it would be fun). He’s exactly the way he is in canon. However, he is constantly trying to set Ania and Erin up and Erin? Doesn’t? Stop? Him? She’s so desperately in love with Ania that if Nicky wingmanning for her is what it takes to win her over, then she’ll take it. She also has a really dirty sense of humor. The jokes he makes fuel her late-night fantasies. 

Aaron is disgusted with Nicky and, more importantly, himself. Ania is incredibly beautiful and he’s incredibly straight. He doesn’t like her bc he’s so gone for Katelyn. That doesn’t make Ania any less pretty. He finds himself staring at her all the time but so does every other fox so he doesn’t feel bad. 

Katelyn thinks Ania is hot. She’s bi but leans heavily towards guys. It takes Aaron a long time to unlearn his homophobia but he manages it because Katelyn is bi and he couldn’t possibly hate anything about her. Once Riko is gone and Ania is safe, she starts to develop feelings. I mean, she always had feelings but now she doesn’t try to suppress them. She lets herself want to be friends with people. Katelyn happens to be at the top of her list. While the twins are with Bee at their sessions, Katelyn and Ania hang out. Sessions are only an hour/hour and a half long so the girls just grab a soda together or go window shopping in Reddin. I hc Katelyn as a genuinely sweet VSCO girl. Let me have this! Ania has a grunge/goth aesthetic because Erin buys her clothes for her but she thinks Katelyn’s clothes are cute too. Erin wants to hate the thousands of scrunchies and anklets she finds strewn across the dorm but they make Ania so happy. Once on a double date, on Bee’s insistence, Katelyn catches sight of a bubblegum pink scrunchie in Erin’s hair. It’s a stark contrast to her all-black outfit but it’s really cute. When Aaron goes to grab their drinks from the barista, Katelyn tells her so making sure to stay well out of Erin’s reach. Erin just grunts and turns to look out the window. The twins don’t blush with their whole face. Instead, their ears turn red. With Erin’s hair pulled up and out of the way, Katelyn has no trouble seeing her burning red ears. It’s progress! 

Ania spends a lot more time out at Evermore as a kid than Neil did. As a result, she was really close to Kevin and Riko. She only knew Jean for like a month before she dipped. I got a request for Fem!Jean so you’ll see Ania’s relationship with Jeanie soon. Kevin sees her as a baby sister. He and Kayleigh were actually at the hospital when Ania was born. There’s a baby photo back at Kayleigh’s old house of 3yr old Kevin carrying a newborn Ania. He’s crying rivers in it. There’s an actual video of it as well. In it, Kay asks him why he’s crying. “She’s sho shmall!” little Kevin sobs. “Can I keep her? Pleashe, mom. I’ll be nice to her and take care of her and I’ll tell her I love her all the time.” You can hear someone laughing in the background. The camera pans across the room to reveal Wymack sitting in a chair by the door, cackling

TANGENT BUT I WANT TO TALK ABOUT WYMACK FOR A MINUTE! So Wymack and Kay are friends with some obvious benefits. He flips his shit when Kevin is born because what if that’s his kid??? Kay is just like, I was with a lot of guys and brushes it off. She’s lying through her teeth. Wymack is the only man she’s ever loved. Tetsuji is salty and I will go into this in another post but I think that Tetsuji really hated Kevin because he was Kay’s son but not his. I absolutely believe that Tetsuji was in love with Kayleigh Day and was pissed when she had a kid. Anyway, Wymack flies out to Ireland a lot to check up on Kay and Kevin because Kay is crazy. How could the inventor of exy not be? It’s literally murder lacrosse. He goes out to make sure Kay isn’t overworking herself and bc Kev has no father figure. Kev grows up knowing Wymack and absolutely adores him. When Kay dies, Wymack wants custody of Kevin. Kay knows who the Moriyamas are and recently she and Tetsuji have been fighting a lot. She’s scared that something is going to happen to her so she writes her will and emphasizes that she wants her son sent to Wymack if she dies. Her fight with Tetsuji comes to a head and the car ‘accident’ happens. It’s not an accident. Tetsuji ordered her killed in a fit of rage. He’s devastated when it actually happens. He loved her and now she’s dead. Well, who’s fault is that, ya dumb bish? He flies out for the funeral and so does Wymack. Tetsu finds the will first and is anger. He has it burned and has Nathan forge a new one where he gets custody of Kev. It breaks Wymack’s heart bc now he thinks Kay didn’t want him around Kev. Kevin is five and he’s crying because his mom is dead and now he can’t live with Wymack. He calls Wymack Dad and Wymack can’t do anything about this. Instead, he just hugs little Kev close and tells him it’ll be okay. Wymack tells Kev that Tetsu has a niece his age. Maybe Kev and Riko can be friends. Maybe they’ll even get married. Kevin says that’s disgusting and Wymack laughs a hollow laugh. Anyway, that’s how Kev gets shipped to Evermore. Tetsu doesn’t allow Wymack near Kev bc he knows the truth. The reason why Wymack always has a sports channel on because he used to keep it on in case Kev ever showed up. He watched every one of Kev’s games and interviews and everything. Wymack doesn’t get to be there to watch Kev grown up so he just watched from a distance. I'm not crying you are. 

Wymack is a father figure to Ania and Erin. He’s there when Ania is born bc he went to visit Kay and Kev who were in Baltimore to meet baby Nathania. Kay carts him out to the hospital to meet her too. Nathan Wesninski was not in the room when his daughter was born. He doesn’t even meet her until she’s six months old. Wymack is the first man Nathania meets and she doesn’t even know. Mary didn’t want to hand Nathania over to Wymack but she and Kay are friends and she knows that he’s her baby daddy. Wymack doesn’t recognize Ania because he only knew her for a month when she was a newborn. Of course he doesn’t recognize her. However, he thinks about her a lot. She’s actually the first baby he’s ever held. He didn’t get to hold Kevin until he was two. Wymack treats Ania the same way he treats Neil but he puts in a bit of extra care bc he knows about Millport incident. 

Abby is definitely as much of a mom figure as she was to Neil. However, after she shows her her scars, Ania gets a lot closer to her. She refuses to tell her things but when Erin gets sent to Easthaven, Ania has a hard time staying at the dorms. She spends all her time at the court bc she has to. She hides in the library bc it’s the one place she wouldn’t see Erin anyways. She crashes at Abby’s a few times because there are times she can’t stand the thought of going back to the dorms without feeling the brush of Erin’s hand on the back of her neck. 

Oh. That’s a thing. Every night after midnight practice n Kev has gone to his room, Ania says goodnight to Erin. Erin will trail her hand across the back of Ania’s neck as she passes in response. It makes Ania shiver because her neck is as much of an erogenous zone as Erin’s is. Erin always watches it out of the corner of her eye bc God it’s the most amazing thing she’s ever seen. It makes her feel. Ania doesn’t really realize???? She’s so dumb. She knows it makes her feel good but she just can’t for the life of her figure out why. 

It’s time I addressed the real psycho lesbian… While Erin’s is a facade, Riko is genuinely psychotic. She’s seven types of crazy. Actually, it skews a little more yandere but I will go into depth about it in the Fem!Jean fic. Rn, I’ll try to keep it short. Riko has her first crush when she’s eight? Nine? She kisses her crush on the cheek when she’s ten and Tetsuji… doesn’t take it well to say the least. The bit about it’s easier to remain straight? It’s the thing Kevin hears Riko say to herself every morning in front of the mirror. Regardless, Riko never gets over that first crush. Riko will never not miss Nathania Wesninski. When she finds out who Ania really is? She loses it. It’s fate, she tells herself. She will have Ania or die trying. Christmas at Evermore is a thing so I mean, I guess she does have Ania :( But she wants Ania to love her. She tells Ania as much and Ania spits in her face. :)

Most of Erin’s relationships are the same except for the Matt and Renee thing I covered earlier. The only other one that changes is Kevin. I know I say this a lot, but she really thought Ania and Kev would be a thing. She says no to Kevin for everything bc she’s petty.  Kevin has always gotten everything that he wanted handed to him on a silver plate. Now he’s taking the one thing she really wants.  If he gets Ania, he can’t have anything else. Again, I’ll cover her relationship with Jean later. 

Thanks again your ask <3

Edit: I'm really tired and have a quiz tomorrow but I forgot to talk about Cleo. I'll make a separate post about her so stay tuned for that!!!

[allforthecourtt]

rereading aftg with my dumbass opinions pt. 2 (tfc chapters 6-10)

pt. 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3

look guys! its the highly unanticipated continuation of my reread of aftg!

chapter 6 (aka. meet this MESS of a team)

“My mother's family is French." It was a lie that probably had his British mother rolling over in her sandy grave.”

neil really never misses an opportunity to remind readers that he fucking buried his mom on the beach huh?

“A liar who practices occasional honesty. Clever. Keeps people guessing. Very effective. I would know. I do it myself, you see. Come on, then. After you.”

have i mentioned how entertaining high andrew is? because he’s funny as hell

also rereading these are fun because Nora is incredible at foreshadowing just sayin

“Neil automatically reached for his seatbelt, but one of the brothers was sitting on it.”

how neil would be in the back of the cousins’ car if they let him:

“You?" Neil said. "You can't." Andrew's smile curved wider. "Ohhh, that sounds like a challenge. Mother may I?" "Your mother's dead. I don't think she cares what you do.”

HO HO HOLY SHIT NEIL

“Starting a fight was too out of character for who he portrayed "Neil” to be, though.”

“Consider this your official invite, you suicidal wretch. I'm bringing you to Columbia with us this Friday.”

awe suicidal wretch... glad they’re starting those pet names early

“I don't drink or dance," Neil said.

andrew: i kno u can

“Kevin doesn't dance anymore”

anymore? ANYMORE??? release the cursed events that led to him not dancing anymore Nora im begging you

“Are you bleeding anywhere?" Matt asked. "Nowhere vital," Neil said.

gskjgnsak god i stan this little asshole so much

“She said it gently, with the hint of a smile on her face, but Neil still felt the rebuke. It was subtler but somehow deadlier”

have i mentioned how gay i am for renee? because im very gay for renee

“Allison looked ready for a photo shoot with perfect platinum curls, spiked heels, and a skintight dress.”

im also gay for allison ngl

“I can move if you want to sit here," Neil said. "No, this is fine." She smiled, but it had a smug edge to it, probably because Seth was glaring at them like he could kill them with willpower alone. ”

lol remember how neil doesn’t think he’s attractive and yet in 0.1 seconds after meeting him allison is like “yes this idiot is hot enough to piss off the other idiot im dating”

“Personal favorite was when someone told the police we were running a meth lab out of the dorm," Dan said sourly. "Police raids are awesome.”

no offence dan but that’s fucking hilarious omg

that’s kind of like the time my residence floor had to get evacuated bc some kids hotboxed their dorm room

god i love uni

“The death threats were creative, though," Nicky said. "Maybe this time they'll follow through and actually kill one of us. Let's vote. I nominate Seth.”

pfffffttttt i love Nicky omg

also hahahahahah foreshadowing!

“It'll be fine," Andrew said. "I promised, didn't I? Don't you believe me?" It took a while, but at last Kevin visibly relaxed. ”

again this is why i thought they were fucking for like the better part of the first two books

“The dead look Kevin turned on Andrew today was the same look Neil saw in his reflection. When Neil stopped acting, when he stopped worrying about who was watching, when he let go of the lies that kept him alive, that was the only expression he could make.”

it’s fine i didnt need a heart anyways

this kid is 18 hes A BABY

the first time i read this i was 18 too and like jfc i was a BABY at 18 and so i neil

“One of us has to make it, Mom." It wasn't going to be Neil. It was obvious he was too stupid to survive without his mother if he let himself get into messes like this. But maybe Kevin could do it.”

sorry let me just wipe my TEARS off my fucking laptop neil honey what the fuck

“He felt distant as he watched them walk in. Maybe he was already dying, his stupid soul fading from his short body in preparation for a brutal end.”

neil we get it you have depression (me too bitch u aint special)

“Fuck running," Seth said.

now that’s a whole ass mood

“he didn't know how Renee could smile so warmly when she was speaking to Andrew.”

haha bitch just wait

“when he slept, he dreamed of his father waiting for him on the Foxhole Court.”

remember how at the end of the series his father is waiting on the court but neil wins??? god we love good storytelling

this is such a fucking wild chapter

could you imagine? coming back from the summer and your first introduction to this amateur from arizona is this neil josten level of sass? because i’d probably kill him

first years are bad enough but first years who dont care about other people’s opinions? the fucking worst

chapter 7 (aka. neil does NOT have a fun night out)

“It seemed Allison and Seth didn't believe in middle ground: either they were slinging vile insults at each other or they were making out in the locker room regardless of whoever might be around.”

that’s just how the straights are

“It reminded Neil a little of Allison and Seth, except without the desperate sexual undertones.”

i’ll just leave this gem of a line here

“His teammates held so little regard for him he didn't even have the dubious honor of being dead last.”

neil shading himself is actually hilarious how relatable

“Neil watched him do it, trying to remember the last time someone gave him a gift and coming up blank. That his first one should be from Andrew was unsettling.”

i actually love the fact that andrew bought him clothes so early on like andrew your gay is showing

“Neil debated how much damage the thick heels of his new boots would do against Andrew's face and liked what his mind came up with.”

i thank god everyday that these books are neil’s pov

“Andrew gave Neil another slow once-over and let go. "We're going.”

^andrew seeing neil w/o contacts (aka. the ‘i can’t think straight’ vine)

“Most of the men wore leather, half the women had corsets, and a good number of both genders were covered in buckles and chains.”

this... is a... gay bar

“Andrew saluted the bouncers on his way by and led the way into the club, bypassing the line entirely.”

i always forget the drinking age in the us is 21 but like this bar really dont care about their liquor license AT ALL lmao

“You think Kevin would risk his future over a night out at the club?" "What future?" Neil asked.”

WOW NEIL WAY TO BE A BITCH

“Neil hadn't seen Aaron get up, but he was waiting behind Neil when Andrew let go. Neil reached for Andrew with lethal intent, but Aaron grabbed the back of his chair and pulled hard enough to topple it over.”

why are the twins literally this gif:

real talk nicky kissing neil like that is horrible and really reflects poorly on nicky as a character

andrew for this entire chapter:

chapter 8 (aka. a hitchhiker’s guide to lying about your identity)

“I don't know how your conversation with Andrew went, but it didn't end well. Rumor has it you paid a busboy a hundred bucks to knock you out. Way to cut our night short.”

this is probably my favourite thing neil does in the entire series ngl

“Wymack grabbed his elbow and hauled him inside. He slowed just long enough to slam the door behind Neil. "Are you stupid or just crazy? Do you have any idea what could have happened to you between here and there? What were you thinking?”

Why does Wymack literally sound like my father?

foxes: daddy?

wymack: DO I LOOK LIKE

follow up:

kevin: daddy?

wymack: uh yeah

“I don't know what the beef is between you two, but it ends here and now.”

Wymack @ neil: tell your boyfriend, if he says he’s got beef that your a vegetarian and your not fucking scared of him

“Then correct me." "Give me a reason." "Besides the obvious?" Andrew said. "If I can't get an answer from you, I'll get it wherever I can.”

andrew:

“I'm—" Neil didn't want to say it, but the word was already there, broken and pathetic between them, "—nothing. I'll always have and be nothing.”

“He wondered for a moment if Andrew could handle the entire truth so calmly, but that was too dangerous and stupid to consider.”

“Hope was a dangerous, disquieting thing, but he thought perhaps he liked it.”

this is such a good fucking line like i am shooketh

chapter 9 (aka. neil is, like, really horny for exy)

“Are you stupid?" Seth asked. "Yeah," Neil said.”

what a fuckin MOOD

“Neil had almost forgotten why he liked Exy so much. He did his best at practices but these days he worked mostly to keep his teammates off his back. As Neil surveyed Kevin's damage, he finally felt inspired again. On its heels was a hungry, desperate rush.”

“Seth made as if to throw his beer at Neil. "His life is not more important than mine just because he's more talented.”

sometimes i really wish seth was actually given a chance to have some character development

“ "Maybe you're not as stupid as I thought." "Maybe I am," Neil said”

another big fucking MOOD

chapter 10 (aka. shocking: university is hard :/ )

“It's fun telling Kevin no," Andrew said with a wicked grin.”

why is andrew like this omg

betsy probably was like just looking for a chill job and was like “oh cool uni students? ill have to deal with like a lot of anxiety, sexual tension, depression and like confusion about the future, not to bad” but NOPE welcome to the fucking MAFIA WARS

“That wasn't so bad, was it? Andrew was convinced it would be a disaster. He put money on you hating Betsy." "Did you bet against him?" "Yes," Renee said. "It was a private bet between the two of us.”

“I hope you didn't lose much," Neil said.”

god why is he such an asshole at every opportunity i love him

“I can take care of myself," Neil said. "Watch me beam with pride.”

wymack is the best father in the world and you cant convince me otherwise

“There was one for every fall team with schedules printed on each. Neil kept the Exy one, tossed the rest into the trash, and buried his magnet deep in his pocket where he didn't have to look at the dates.”

neil “i only care about exy” josten strikes again with his great school spirit

“Palmetto State was facing Edgar Allan on Friday, October 13th”

that’s such a cliche and i love it

“He detoured around students toward one of Palmetto State's three dining halls. Two were for the general student body. The third was for athletes only”

lmao my school literally has one dining hall and it couldnt give less of a fuck what type of student they’re selling food too as long as they’ll pay $15 for chicken fingers

what kind of money does palmetto state fuckin have

like i get us tuition is a lot but jesus so’s mine and my school couldn’t be less fucked

“It was only the first day of school and he already had three assignments: a short paper, a fifty-page chapter to read, and a page of questions about said chapter. Neil debated for a minute as to which one sounded least painful. Five minutes later he was still uninspired, so he put his head down on his desk.”

1. MOOD

2. first years are so cute thinking that’s a lot of assignments i remember in first year being like “i have to read 40 pages thats so unfair :(” and now i’m like “ah sick only 200 pgs of readings this week? im gonna have so much free time!”

upper year history sucks ngl

“I'm fine," Neil said.”

neil knows exactly two (2) words and those are it

“You say that an awful lot," Matt said. "I'm starting to think you don't know what it means.”

overall thoughts:

the plot is pickinnnng upppp

i kind of forget how much world building happens in the first book but like its good

also i love neil literally hating everyone its so funny bc like bby these going to be your best friends just wait

anyways that’s all for now

part 3 will be the rest of tfc and then we’ll move onto trk if you guys still want more of this? let me know

love u all bye

[orbemnews]

Conyers resident Walter Harris grieves loss of home and history CONYERS — Dollar Bill had been his little best friend and constant companion for more years than he can remember. While Walter Harris’ Chihuahua was small in stature, his heart was big and brave. With the house burning down around them, Harris and Dollar Bill scrambled to safety outside in the yard. It was then the little dog turned and ran back into the fiery blaze. Folks say they believe he rushed back in to save Harris’ grandson, Jefferson Tye, who had already managed to find his own way out of the collapsing house. The brave little dog would not survive. He died of smoke inhalation and was later found among the ashes of the Conyers home. His dog’s death was but one of the many blows Harris would suffer from that horrific early morning fire on March 22. That was the day the Rockdale County native lost everything he had ever worked for his entire life. “He lost ev-er-ry-thing,” his niece Renee’ Simpson said. “He lost every possession he ever owned and that he worked for all his life. Everything went up in flames…He had no insurance. He had liability on his vehicles. We’ll have to buy him a truck. No insurance on his house and only liability on his truck and car. No pension, no savings, nothing.” A man of few words who lived a simple life, Harris never needed much. And what he did have, he shared with others who were lacking. “He’s always been so quiet,” Simpson said. “He was a workaholic and a fisherman and always there for the family. When the family was in need, he was always there to do whatever he could physically or financially when he was employed and had money.” Harris did construction work all his life, primarily laying brick and pouring concrete. He also did what he could for his fellow citizens in Conyers. Simpson tells how Harris had four lawnmowers and for years, he would put the equipment on the back of his trailer and go to small churches throughout the community and mow their lawns for free. Now that equipment too is just rubble in the ashes. It was an old small mill house in the Milstead community, but it was Harris’ home for 51 years. Filled with photos and memorabilia from his 80 years of life, the little house is where he and his late wife lived and where they raised their family. His wife had lived in the house next door before the couple married, so to Harris, this spot, this community is special. “It is very sad,” Simpson said. “He is grieving daily. When I speak of that grief, just imagine a person who returns to the gravesite of a spouse daily. That was his entire life.” The elderly widower is temporarily staying with friends nearby, but his niece says he keeps telling her he just wants to go home. Since the day after the fire, Harris goes to the ruins of his home each morning at 8, where he stays until 7 each evening. His niece worries because he often talks with well-wishers who stop by about those terrible moments of March 22, and he cries. Harris said it was about 4 a.m. when he heard a loud pop. He later told his niece he thought it was a transformer, so he got up and went to the kitchen in the front of the house. He saw smoke coming underneath the door, so he ran back to his bedroom to get dressed and when he returned to the front, the fire was coming underneath the door. Simpson said the cause of the fire is undetermined. Some have suggested it might have been a gas leak, but his niece said her uncle had not had the gas connected to his house for four years. The only thing for sure is that the house is gone and all that’s left now is a tumble of wood and destroyed belongings. “He said it hurts him to leave,” Simpson said. “While he’s there, he just burns a piece or two or three and he literally stares at the fire. I’ve never seen anything like it before in my life.” Some have recommended he move into an apartment or subsidized housing, but Harris tells them he will die if he has to do that. His niece says she believes he would grieve himself to death and probably would not live longer than a month. “He just wants to be right there in that exact spot and doesn’t want to go anywhere else,” she added. Simpson has sent out 213 letters to companies and organizations asking for help with rebuilding her uncle’s home. A few have reached out, but Simpson hopes others will offer to donate materials, money, services or volunteer their time. She said her uncle and family are grateful for everything people have already been doing to help. Success! An email has been sent to with a link to confirm list signup. Error! There was an error processing your request. “There have been a couple of churches that have come out and left money for food,” she said. “Beasley’s Drug Store has been wonderful. They’ve been bringing food out. We’ve had people in the community to bring him clothing and now he has more than he needs. Toiletries have been overwhelming. He has an abundance. Our main focus right now is the difficult part of getting the house reconstructed. We’re needing building materials, laborers, people who are professionals who can donate their time for flooring, insulation, drywall and other needs.” A licensed real estate agent for 24 years, Simpson has found a house plan that is as similar as possible to Harris’ former home. It is a small two-bedroom cottage with a family room and a kitchen. “He’s pleased with that,” she said. “He just wants to be right there in that exact spot…All he talks about is having his house rebuilt. He says, ‘I just want to go home and walk into my house.’” Simpson said she is planning to go through her own old family photos and is looking forward to the day she can frame a few to hang on the walls of her uncle’s new house. Every time he sees her, Harris tells his niece how much he appreciates her and says he doesn’t know what he would do without her. Simpson worries about her uncle and wants to do everything she can. “I can’t explain it,” she said. “He’s in his own world. I’ve never seen him like this in my whole life.” A GoFundMe page has been set up and donations can be made by going to “That’s my favorite uncle — always,” Simpson said, adding that she is the daughter of Harris’ late brother, James, who passed away in 1997. “He’s a fisherman and I love fish. I could eat it seven days a week. He’d always go fishing and he’d call me up and say he’s got fish for me. I’d pop in on him and make sure he’s OK… We’ve always been very close.” It was Harris’ neighbor, who is also a close family friend, who called Simpson the morning of the fire. She first asked the friend if her uncle and cousin were safe and the friend said yes, but added that no one could find little Dollar Bill. Simpson arrived at daybreak to see her uncle standing there with tears rolling down his face. “I felt a sense of tremendous void,” Simpson said. “I was hurting as though I’d just lost my dad all over again. The tears from him were not just for a loss, but a death. It touched me to the core, and I could not fathom what he was feeling at that time. Every emotion he was feeling, it drifted over to me. I could feel it…The takeaway is he survived and my cousin survived. So after gathering myself, I was able to give a sigh of relief. “All of this other stuff can be replaced, but when you think about it, I know this is what he’s thinking, it cannot be replaced. Fifty-one years. It cannot.” Stacker compiled a list of 25 billionaires who live in some of America’s smallest towns, using Forbes’ real-time billionaire list and the U.S. Census Bureau’s American Community Survey. Click for more. Source link Orbem News #buildingindustry #company #Conyers #dollarbill #grieves #Harris #history #home #Loss #Niece #renee #resident #Simpson #Walter #walterharris

[mistyandmatt]

Friends (Insert the Friends theme song here)

We’ve shared a lot of our specific activities we have done while on this trip, as well as all the lovely landscape we’ve got to experience, but I want to take a quick minute to talk about a few things that have really made this trip much more meaningful for me. See, one of the many reasons I found a love in traveling (and let’s be honest entertaining strangers in my home who are also travelers) is because I’m really an introverted social person. I love knowing who people are, where they came from, the things that bring them happiness and joy, what their life experiences have been, and what truly makes them the individuals they are. It’s the innate social worker in me, I suppose. I can’t help it, nor would I change it, because it’s given me the chance to create amazing friendships and truly notable acquaintances over the years. This trip has given us the opportunity to not only meet new people everywhere we go, but for us to reconnect with our friends, many of which Matt or I have had the chance to spend time with in at least two to five years. I introduced you all to my friend Josh, the heavy-pour bartender who enabled us to miss our first flight to Hawaii, I’d now like you all to get aquatinted with Rene. Rene and I had the opportunity to work together in the Oklahoma County juvenile court system since 2008. We first bonded over our crazy work experiences, but second was our love for animals. Rene’s spirit and energy is contagious, her laugh so very lovable, and her feistiness is like none other. A few years ago she decided to move back to Kauai (she’s from here) to lead a more simpler, present-moment life. So, as Matt and I were coming into town, we contacted her to meet up and catch up on her life happenings. On Sunday, Rene gladly served as our local tour guide taking us from the Lihue/Kapaa area all the way west to the Waimea Canyon. We stopped to see several waterfalls, we did a rum tasting at the Koloa rum shop, we toured the coffee plantation at the Kauai Coffee Company, and hiked up to see the best views of the Waimea Canyon (noted as the Grand Canyon of the pacific). We got to see all the great spots, including lunch at a fantastic little side-of-the-road shrimp stand that was absolutely phenomenal. She was able to give us all the history of the area and all the fun insider details of truly being a local. A huge thank you to her for taking her day to do this for and with us, we had a great time and loved getting to catch up with one another. This was our last day in Kauai and quite frankly I was terribly sad to leave. I fell in love with this island and can see us coming back here many times in the future.

The next day we headed to the airport for our last Hawaiian island flight to make the quick trip over to Oahu for the next two days. We managed to get to the airport, get our boarding passes, and then headed towards security. Well, this is where things once again at an airport went south. Matt always tells me I’m not friendly enough with the airline people and that he is just going to “handle” the check in processes since he thinks he can use his brilliant personality to get what he wants (read: Matt thinks he is awesome and he has endless skills…) just wait. So, I took him up on the offer. He was handling check in this time. Matt always carries this specific knife with him everywhere, and he’s usually really good about remembering to take it out and put it in his checked luggage. Well, since you know we can’t get anywhere on time with him, we are cutting it close to boarding time as we are going through security. Well, “Brilliant Personality” forgot to put his knife in his checked luggage (probably because I wasn’t asking him 800 questions about do you have this, have you done that, etc.) and TSA obviously wouldn’t let him take it through. He decided to go over to the baggage check area to see if they would pull his bag and put it in there, but it had already gone out to get on the plane. At this point, they are calling our names on the intercom that they were going to shut the doors to the plane in two minutes and here he is, still not back through security for the second time. I literally ran to the gate (I’m too fat and out of shape for that kind of activity) and begged the ladies to wait so that he could get on the plane (I shouldn’t have, maybe he would have learned his lesson). Luckily, they did for his sake. Matt had to end his 12 year relationship with this specific knife at the baggage counter of Hawaiian Airlines because of his poor planning and “handling the check in process.” I’ll bet he’ll relinquish that decision back over to me again fairly quickly, since episode one of his new approach didn’t work so well. Twenty years later, some things just never change.

We were only going to be in Oahu for two days before catching our flight for the next leg of the journey, so we tried to hit a few highlights while we were there. We went to the USS Arizona (Pearl Harbor) memorial and museum as soon as we left the airport. The government was still technically shut down at that point and it was going to be the last day they were going to be open for visitors if a resolution had not been established. We stayed in Waikiki Beach that night and found ourselves making new friends in the hotel bar. At this point, we were about 11 days into this trip (which around 10 days historically is when I start to get cranky, want to sleep in my own bed, and become terribly impatient and intolerant of just about anything), we decide to go down for one drink and then we will go watch the sunset and go to bed early. Well, one drink turned into several, new friends were made, no sunset was seen, and no dinner was had. Four hours later we finally got to bed, so much for resting I suppose.

I’m pretty sure we wear ourselves totally out on these trips because we just have this drive to see and do as much as we can on our time off. With high expectations from both Matt and I, and a bucket list that seems endless, some days I just really want to rest and do absolutely nothing. No rest for the weary here, by 9:00 am the next day we were headed to the North Shore of Oahu to catch the locals surfing on what we were told were some pretty spectacular waves. January-March is the season for the 20-30 foot waves in this area that the crazy locals seem to love. After a few hours of watching the surfers (see attached photos), we also got to see a full on, out-of-the-water breaching humpback whale. Unfortunately, since nature isn’t “on demand” Matt wasn’t ready with the camera for it, but the image is permanently burned into my memory and I’ll take that, it was spectacular. We then spent the afternoon at the Dole Plantation learning all about the history of pineapples in Hawaii and of course, trying the famous Dole Whip. The tour around the gardens was interesting, as was the beautiful landscape they keep absolutely pristine. Who knew it takes 2 full years to grow a single pineapple? You learn something new everyday! The real highlight of the day was finding the mecca of all Target stores in the U.S. I needed to get a few things before we start the next phase of this trip (and lets be honest, I just really needed to get away from Matt for like one hour and mosey around looking at all the things I don’t need). With some hawaiian potato chips (they didn’t have any popcorn at this Target) and a fresh Diet Coke in hand, the three story Target store was just what I needed at that time. Next adventure: Dinner with Matt’s longtime friend, Philip and his wife, Andrea.

Back to the earlier conversation about meeting up with long-time friends, Matt and Philip have been friends since 2001. They were students at OU at the time and also worked together. Matt also became good friends with Philips brother, Ed, who served many years as our resident guinea pig on trying Matt’s random BBQ/cooking creations while he was in medical school. It’s been about 2-3 years since we’ve last seen each other, so getting together for dinner was on the agenda. We ate dinner at the Side Street Inn restaurant, which is known as a place for “local comfort food.” We followed up with hours of conversation at their house after their two sweet kiddos went to bed. As I’ve been missing sweet JuJu cat, I was able to get my kitty fix here, as the Nguyen’s recently became a kitten nursery, as their human kids let in a stray momma cat who was pregnant. Those little kitties were just so sweet and cuddly, exactly what I needed. At about 2:00 am we finally returned to our hotel to catch about three to four hours of sleep before we had to pack and be back at the airport to begin the international leg of this trip. It’s going to be a long day…..

Hawaii has been a wonderful experience and we’ve enjoyed every minute of it. Can’t wait to come back! Up next: Tokyo, Japan, off to meet all of Matt’s extended relatives for the first time ever. I can’t wait to see how this goes…..

[himbowelsh]

Bob ships: who's the rock star? who's the fan who tags along on tour with them?(*cough cough* groupie *cough cough*) ❤🎸

WINNIX

nix is a celebrity stalker. that’s literally his job.

he’s like the paparazzi, but twice as cunning and twice as shitty. his job is to catch celebrities at their most unguarded. this can involve hiding in bushes, sneaking into hotel rooms, and even pretending to be a limo driver just to catch the money shot.

(it’s not like he needs the money. he took a photo of a kardashian once for kicks, got paid huge dollars for it, and decided this sounded more fun than working for his father.)

his latest assignment: to infiltrate the inner sanctum of richard “dick” winters, country and slow rock megastar.

dick has a squeaky clean public reputation. he doesn’t drink, he doesn’t party, he’s never gotten into any fights with the paparazzi. he doesn’t even have any parking tickets (nix checked). he’s the most boring celebrity nix has ever encountered.

nix pulls his favorite stunt – he waits until room service is cleaning dick’s hotel room, then sneaks in and hides in the closet.

(90% of what nix does is technically illegal, but he figures it’s not that illegal if he doesn’t get caught.)

when dick comes back from his show that night, he seems tired. he puts him guitar down, runs a hand through his hair and takes off his shirt.

nix is just ready to get the money shot (or at least a photo of shirtless dick winters) when he accidentally jostles a hanger in the closet. the noise catches dick’s attention. he spins around, and in two seconds nix is being hauled out of the closet.

“who are you?” dick demands, tossing nix down on the bed. he doesn’t look furious, but he also doesn’t look like he for sure won’t call the cops, so nix weighs his risks.

“well, mister winters, this is a hell of a way to meet you,” he says, holding out a hand. “lewis nixon. how about i call you dick?”

“how about i call the police?” replies dick, raising an eyebrow.

“well… you could do that… but then you’d miss out on some very simulating conversation, and a story you’re not going to believe…”

nix has no clue how he does it, but somehow he manages to talk dick out of reporting him. in exchange, he promises not to take any pictures of him, and get out of his hair. dick has a better idea.

(maybe he’s a little intrigued by the smart-mouthed paparazzi who doesn’t seem afraid of anything.)

they eat lunch together the next afternoon. dick has to leave the city the next day, but nix gives him his number and promises that if he needs anything, just give him a call.

they run into each other every so often after that – nix often isn’t that far behind dick. their meetings are friendly, getting friendlier each time. no matter how hard he tries, nix has no idea how he let himself fall in love with a celebrity.

SPEIRTON

carwood lipton does not have a problem.

he’s not the type of guy who goes out clubbing every night. he doesn’t blast electro music through the house, he doesn’t drag his friends out on weekends to dance at the local clubs. he is not an obsessive fan.

if he owns every single track that a particular DJ Sparky has released on Spotify, well, that doesn’t mean he has a problem.

(he also has dozens of magazine clippings of him, has watched the approximately two interviews sparky has given in his lifetime, and can recite everything the public knows about him from memory. this does not mean he has a problem.)

“you,” his friend george proclaims one day, after having discovered the photo album of magazine clippings carwood keeps on sparky, “have a problem.”

“no, i don’t.” carwood is so deep in denial that he’s underground.

“well, it’s a good thing you do, because i’m about to make your day.”

with a flourish, luz unveils two tickets to a DJ sparky show. carwood almost has a heart attack on the spot.

(he tackles luz. he’s never done that in his life. for a moment, luz is terrified that he’s managed to break him.)

they’ve only been in the club for five minutes before carwood ditches luz in the middle of the dance floor. he feels bad about it, and it’s not like he does it on purpose, but he sees sarky dj’ing, customary hood and sunglasses on his head, and something in him just short-circuits. he needs to get closer -- he needs to be able to see him.

he stays by the DJ station for the entire show, just losing himself in the music. the jams sparky spins are legendary, and they can take carwood to a completely different universe.

as son as the show ends, he has a book clutched in his hands, intent on getting an autograph. he doesn’t want to freaky sparky out, but he needs to meet him, even though he doesn’t want to come on to strong, and he’s coming this way --

“you’ve been watching me all night,” is the first thing sparky says. carwood feels like he’s going to faint.

“i have... sorry, it’s just, my name’s carwood and i’m such a huge fan... you’re amazing. i can hardly even believe i’m meeting you right now...”

carwood lipton is not a man who gets tongue-tied, okay? this is humiliating for him, and he can feel his face growing hotter with every word. he wants to melt into the floor on the spot. sparky is going to think he’s an idiot.

then, just like that, sparky pulls his hood and glasses off. he’s never revealed his face in any of his photo ops, co carwood had no clue what he looked like until that point.

he’s dazzled. sparky is grinning at him, wamr and mischievous, and he feels like he’s gone to heaven.

“nice to meet you, carwood,” sparky says, holding out a hand. “i’m ron. it’s great to meet my biggest fan.”

BABEROE

babe is not a groupie, okay? he doesn’t care what anyone else (coughbillcough) says, and he’s definitely not obsessed with his favorite band.

lueur de lune is a duo who performs mainly relaxed indie music, duets, and covers of classic songs. renee lemaire is from belgium, and has been singing since she was a child. babe has scanned through the videos of her on youtube, favorited elementary school talent contests and middle school charity concerts. gene roe’s history is a lot harder to track. as far as babe can figure out, he was from louisiana, and only began singing a few years ago. aside from him having met renee on a trip to europe, babe honestly knows nothing about the enigmatic second half of the band.

lueur de lune has only been performing together for a couple of years. they’re not even the style of music babe usually listens to. instead of pounding beats and frenetic bass drops, the two singers go back and forth in relaxed rhythms that never fail to calm babe down. they’ve become his comfort music.

(gene roe’s face may have also become his comfort face, but he’s not going to admit that.)

because the band is pretty low-profile, he often has no clue where they’re touring. he eats up every mention of them on the web, devours their rare interviews (where renee is bubbly and gene frustratingly reticent), and plays their singles hundreds of times.

everything changes when spina auditions and wins a spot as a drummer for “some indie band that needs a few background members”.

babe doesn’t know – he has no clue – until spina sends him a selfie from rehearsals one day.

spina’s grinning on one side of the picture. on the other, staring into the camera with his usual intense gaze, is a face that almost makes babe’s heart stop.

it’s gene roe.

IT’S GENE FREAKING ROE.

babe goes nuts.

he spends all night begging spina to take him to rehearsal – and when he says no, he sneaks into the trunk of his car.

(you’ve gotta die sometime, right? spina might kill him, but at least he’ll have seen gene)

somehow he makes it past spina without getting caught – and poses as an intern. the band doesn’t have an intern, they can’t afford one, but babe doesn’t care. he takes everyone’s orders and runs to starbucks.

he spends the rest of the day – the rest of the week, to spina’s utmost disdain – shadowing gene. gene is baffled, but tolerant, of his “greatest fan”. renee thinks it’s hilarious. spina has already tried to smother babe in his sleep twice.

babe is just eating up any information he can get about gene. slowly, the star-quality is beginning to wear off – eventually gene will just be another regular guy. until then, he’s more than happy to embrace the role of intern – and groupie.

WEBGOTT

webster wants to report on the wildlife section of his local newspaper, but instead he gets assigned to cover the concert a band is throwing downtown.

he’s got no previous knowledge of the band, and no interest. frankly, the black and blues sound like your average grunge rock band that’s going to fade out in a few years or less. their drummer, talbert, is more interested in flirting than music, and their guitarist, grant, was out for a week with a concussion after trying to break up a fight in the audience of their last show. 

it’s not until he meets the lead singer that web really feels a spark of interest for the assignment.

not just interest. inspiration. awe. he’s found his muse in the form of messy hair, a killer smirk, and a leather jacket that shines under the stage lights.

joe liebgott is everything a rock star should be, and he’s hasn’t even played outside of the state yet.

web isn’t head over heels for the guy. liebgott is infuriating. he’s temperamental, argumentative, and can be downright cruel. he’s also a beacon of talent, and hypnotizing on stage. he’s everything webster could have wanted to write about, and web is…

awed.

(okay, so maybe he’s a little in love.)

after his article is written, he sticks around with the group. he’s determined to take on a side job as their publicist, and the band likes him enough that they let him stick around. they tease him, but webster doesn’t care – he loves the articles he writes for them, and he loves his job.

(and if the thing he loves most is getting to banter with liebgott every day, he can deal with that.)

LUZTOYE

whenever a celebrity needs their reputation revamped, they call george luz. the man is an expert at PR – he can turn a celebrity from a delinquent to a charity-leading golden boy in less than a month. he has a history of turning around people’s careers using charm, PR stunts, and no small amount of humor.

luz is damn good at what he does.

joe toye, as it happens, is in dire need of a revamped reputation. his former group, the one that made his name famous, has just broken up. toye is determined to start a solo rock career, but his public image has taken a big hit thanks to a bar fight that he didn’t start, but definitely finished.

(a guy may have been punched through a plate-glass window. joe reiterates that he didn’t start it.)

when luz agrees to work with joe, he knows he’s got a big job ahead of him. he’s surprised by how down to earth joe is, however. for a fast paced rock star, he would have expected joe to have an ego. instead he proves himself to be down-to-earth, not going out of his way to draw attention to himself.

(”i don’t like the spotlight,” joe tells luz once they’ve started to build trust between them. “i love to perform. that’s it. i don’t care about all the attention.”  luz gotten to know a lot of celebrities, but after hearing these words he can’t help but respect joe more than all of them.)

luz is the one who arranges public appearances for joe. he’s got the rock star volunteering at animal adoption drives, food banks, and charities. joe feels a little awkward at first (a big part of him is convinced it’s only for the photo opportunity, not for any better reason) but luz alleviates his discomfort when he volunteers next to him.

george is annoying, overly-friendly,and great at bugging the hell out of joe. he also has the ability to smooth over every social situation, and raises joe’s morale when he isn’t sure he has any left. he starts to genuinely enjoy spending time with his PR rep.

soon tabloids start reporting on the mysterious man seen next to joe toye during all his public appearances. it just takes a little research to uncover who luz is, but it’s a lot more fun to speculate that he might be joe’s lover instead.

george and joe are baffled by the allegations, but not upset by them. they sort of laugh them off until one night after joe’s show, when they both celebrate a little too much, and get a little too friendly with each other.

when george wakes up in joe’s bed the next morning, there’s a tabloid resting on the pillow next to him. “JOE TOYE AND MYSTERY BEAU TAKE ON THE TOWN”.

george smirks and pins the page up on joe’s fridge. “well, mystery beau,” he quips, “you feelin’ like being a little more discreet?”

joe gives a gravelly chuckle that drives luz wild. “what’s the point?”

(george has never fallen for any of his clients before, either, but it’s obvious that joe is a special case. he might be breaking his own rule of staying out of the public eye himself, but he isn’t complaining.)

[reflectingiridescent]

Kylee Goes to the Star Trek Convention. Here’s what happened. (Part 1)

(Ok, sorry about the title. I miss being a journalist sometimes. Only sometimes.)

GUYS I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START. Everyone told me that the con high would go away, and I’d be so sad the week after, but I feel like I’m maybe still on the high? It was just such a good and wholesome experience. I’ll try to break it down.

An important thing, I guess, to point out first and foremost was that Jonathan Frakes couldn’t come (got stuck at work and there were no flights going out, supposedly). So this upset a lot of people because it was advertised as the only time the TNG cast was going to be together all of 2017 (their 30th anniversary year). But this didn’t mean anything for me because I was there to meet my space moms, grandmas, and aunts! <3

So for a little background, I love Star Trek, and I love DS9 the most, but I watched TNG for the first time a couple years ago and liked it well enough. And then I watched it over the past few months during my layoff (and visa troubles). It was kind of this happy family place I could come home to. And also these actors are getting old! So I thought it would be best to go see them while I (reasonablyish) had the funds during a milestone? Also the TNG cast is fucking funny together, and I wanted to see that alone.

Wednesday

(So I only went to three days of the five-day con because that was cheaper , and also I have a cousin who lives in Las Vegas who I really don’t see often, and I see her daughter even less often, so we were squeezing in family time too - and I like never slept, and I made up for all of it yesterday by sleeping THE WHOLE DAMN DAY NOT EVEN SORRY.)

So they’d halted ticket sales online before I got there, so this was only a little stressful (I hadn’t heard of them running out of tickets before, and they were pretty much up for grabs once the actual con started on Wednesday). So I got there at 7:30am and was like I NEED TO BUY TICKETS FOR ALL OF THESE DAYS, etc. And the TNG reunion panel was set for Friday night and was an additional cost...whatever, cons are super capitalistic, and that’s like, the language of the US right? (I was also very happy to be home. Jury’s still out on the home thing, but I think I will always consider the US my home. Specific place? Not decided yet.) But I got everything, which was the most important.

Cool Stuff!

The Gaaays in Spaaace panel (literally how it was spelled), which is like this set of Trek parties thrown across the country with different ST actors showing up to them. So their party was on Friday (I went!), and Nana was the featured guest for both the party and the panel, which was really cool, because everyone was bringing up everything from the kisses on DS9 to polyamory, and we were discussing it like it was breakfast food.

Nana told a story about how when she used to be a dancer on Broadway, all the men she was in a production in once died because of the AIDS epidemic.

Kinsey scale brought up in relationship to DS9 characters, and basically they didn’t say that Kira/Dax wasn’t a thing, so like...that was kind of cool lol.

I won a rainbow tribble for answering trivia about same-sex kisses on DS9!!! I WILL KEEP IT FOREVER.

I stopped by the Gaaays in Spaaace table later and asked about a plethora of other relationships, and one of the dudes was like, “I’m sorry Gates girl, but Sub Rosa was the best episode because of the hair. The wigs in that episode were on point.” And then we had a long conversation about TNG hair, and it gave me life. (Don’t read me wrong - Sub Rosa is terrible, but the hair in that episode was fucking great, rivaled only MAYBE by All Good Things hair and Troi’s in Parallels.)

Also said by this guy: “I can’t believe they used a season 1 shot of Dr. Crusher on the con program. Like, really? Really, girl?”

I FUCKING LOVE THE INTERSECTION OF STAR TREK AND GAY OK.

I was too late (because I didn’t even know if Singapore would let me leave the country until like 5 days before I flew) to get tickets for Nana’s autographs, but I got a picture with her, and she was so cool! I tried to quickly tell her that she was my favorite, and it worked out pretty well.

AND THEN I TOOK PICS WITH NICHELLE NICHOLS AND MY RAINBOW TRIBBLE. I didn’t know then that the smart thing to do was to bring back the pics to be signed by them, so I had her sign my program. She was wearing a ST necklace and a little Uhura pin. So wonderful. So obviously I couldn’t say anything of substance because I was freaking out, but she told me that my name’s pretty close to her son’s name, so obviously I was over the moon for the rest of the day.

Nichelle crashed Mae Jemison’s session, which was really interesting. She discussed the 100 Year Starship project. This led to a really important moment when Mae told the audience, “If you’re looking for someone to give you permission to be in the room, I’m giving it to you.” She then turns to Nichelle and says, “You did that. You gave me permission to be in the room.”

I cried. The lady sitting a row behind me cried. The lady sitting three seats down from me was crying.

And then I got very emotional and Facebook-messaged my 6th/7th grade science teacher (who, btw, is the reason I possess the Greatest Real Life Love Story I’ve Ever Heard - a story for another day) and was like THANK YOU FOR BEING SO EXCITED ABOUT SPACE BECAUSE I AM WATCHING MAE JEMISON SPEAK AND I AM SO EXCITED AND ONE OF THE REASONS I’M EVEN HERE IS BECAUSE OF YOU.

She literally offered me a job doing research for her husband (who works for NASA). Oh my god. And she knew exactly what Mae was talking about because she’d just seen her speak at another event. I had such good science teachers.

I told this story to a lady in line behind me for a photo op, and she started crying because she had quit her banking job to become a teacher, and I was like, “Ok, but remember that scene in TNG - like one of those times Wesley saves the ship - and Picard says they should thank his science teacher? That’s you!”

She’d moved from Idaho to Nevada because the school system she was in in Idaho had cut math and science from the curriculum. :(

I did leave before any of the karaoke stuff so that I could go hang with my family though!

Oh and I was wearing glitter the whole day, and Nichelle and Nana both told me it was nice, and Nichelle complimented my hair color (I’d had it red). So lovely. I didn’t have time for a costume but wore red in both their honor.

I shook Daniel Davis’ hand but didn’t have fucking cash on me (still hadn’t changed my Singapore dollars and didn’t want the crazy ATM charges from Not My Bank), so I couldn’t get a pic. But he was so nice. And we chatted a bit about The Nanny, because that’s really where I knew him from first? Hahaha. He stayed the whole con and mentioned wanting to be able to meet the producers from his episode so he could thank them. Class act.

Half-DS9 panel! Terry, who wasn’t supposed to appear until the other DS9 half panel on Sunday, crashed it. Nana screamed, “Oh my god!” and flung herself across stage to hug her.

Ira Steven Behr basically coming out and saying that we’re never going to get to Roddenberry’s vision and that DS9 was as good as it was going to get.

Rene had crashed Nana’s Gaaays in Spaaace panel that morning and really hadn’t known how to answer a question about Odo and asexuality. He took time to clarify during the panel - he’s not against Odo being asexual - he was not familiar with the term but basically agreed. He didn’t want it to come across that he was negating that identity.

Ok, going to do another post later because this is going to be hella long, I think.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

How to support a writer's career [Please share!]

Since the earliest days of my novel-writing career, readers have written to me to thank me for my books and to ask how they can best support me and other writers whose work they enjoy. Nearly 15 years later, I have a pretty comprehensive answer for them!

Writers' commercial and critical fortunes are intertwined: a writer whose books perform well is a writer whose publisher buys and promotes more books from them, creating a virtuous cycle, as promotions beget more sales and more promotions.

The most important time to support a writer is just after their latest book comes out -- my novel, Walkaway, is in its first week of publication -- because that is the make-or-break moment for that book, and, conceivably, for its writer.

Books that perform well in their first weeks become bestsellers. Bestsellers are more likely to be reviewed by major outlets, they are ordered in larger quantities by booksellers (a bookseller who takes five or more copies of a book will very likely place that book face-out in a new releases section and/or on a table at the front of the store). They are given close attention by collections-development staff in libraries, and are snapped up for translations by foreign publishers. They are read by production staffers for TV and movie studios. They renew interest in the author's backlist, too.

Contrariwise, books that flop go into a death-spiral. They are returned by booksellers, their sales-figures are used to justify a smaller advance for the next book (and less promotions budget), and booksellers order fewer copies of the author's next book. In really dire situations, a badly performing book can kill a writer's career.

Thankfully, Walkaway looks to be on course to be a bestseller, judging from early numbers and indicators. You readers have helped me in innumerable ways to make this happen and I am very, very grateful to you for it. Here are ways that you can continue to support Walkaway, my career, and future books from me:

Buy Walkaway or check it out of the library. Either one sends a strong signal to my publisher, to reviewers, to foreign publishers and to the industry. This is the most important thing you can do.

Review the book and tell your friends. Put your recommendation in your social media, in an online bookseller's page, on Goodreads. There is literally nothing that sells books better than personal recommendations. This is the second-most important thing you can do.

Buy Walkaway from an indie bookseller. The independent booksellers are the best friends authors can have. They support our tours, hand-sell our books, write shelf-reviews and talk the book up to other bookish people. I am visiting 30+ indie bookstores on my tour and leaving signed copies in my wake -- any of the stores I've visited will be glad to send you one by mail-order (and you can always call a store with an upcoming event to request a personalized, inscribed copy). Indie bookstores are experiencing a renaissance and your custom gives them the stability they need to continue.

Come out for the tour! I'm in Chicago tonight at Volumes Bookcafe, with Max Temkin from Cards Against Humanity. Bring along your old books to sign, but buy the new one from the store that's hosting the event, to help them recoup the cost of extra staff, promo, etc. Coming to a tour stop tells bookstores that you value their place in your community and encourages them to continue bringing authors in.

Buy a fair-trade ebook. I just launched the first-ever fair-trade ebook store. I am a retailer for my own ebooks and audiobooks, selling on behalf of my publishers worldwide. Buying direct from me doubles my royalties, and the book you get not only has no DRM, but it also comes without any kind of license agreement, and it is the only way to buy ebooks from a major publisher without having to sign away your legal rights in the bargain. Buying a book this way tells publishers and the industry that fair compensation for authors and fair legal bargain matter to you.

Buy the audiobook. The Walkaway audiobook is amazing, read by Wil Wheaton, Amber Benson (Buffy the Vampire Slayer), Amanda Palmer (The Dresden Dolls), Mirron Willis, Gabrielle de Cuir, Lisa Renee Pitts and Justine Eyre. I produced it independently and it is without question the best audio adaptation of any of my work, ever. Of course, it's DRM-free, too.

I've been on the road for a week now and I'm just hitting my stride. I've met thousands of readers so far on this tour and every meeting has been a pleasure and an honor. You readers are what make my writing possible. Thank you so much for your support, I literally would not have a career without you.

Cory

(Photo: Ruth Copland)

https://boingboing.net/2017/05/07/a-joint-enterprise.html