#it stimulates my appetite

[willoftrees]

why nausea :C i don't wanna smoke weeds rn....

[orgyofthedamned]

ive never rolled a joint in my life do you need special paper or can i use a xerox paper

[your-daily-bobby-pic]

( ´ w ` )

A photo of a bengal cat laying on a pink blanket. His left front paw lays at an angle while his right front paw is curled underneath him. He looks wistfully off into the distance.

[galacticdrift]

always good when you can slide your breakdowns to the weekend instead of letting them disrupt your work week

[nat-20s]

Yippee!! The vet says my cat is in extremely good health for her age!

[oysters-aint-for-me]

i’ve been trying to eat during the daytime more because right now i only eat after the sun goes down basically and even though i still miss traditional hunger signals (ie tummy hurts) thanks to my new meds i am starting to feel and notice other less obvious hunger signals (ie irritability, difficulty focusing, feeling like i am incapable of doing anything, sneezing*) and so now that i know eating helps with those things, it’s just silly not to. except my stomach isn’t used to eating during the day and it’s a crapshoot** as to whether or not the food will send me running to the toilet. yesterday i went to a baseball game and had half of a soft pretzel and my stomach went “UUUHH??? it’s 1 pm? i’m not on shift what do you expect me to do w this” then later at like 12 am i had two microwave burritos and a plate of tortilla chips and my stomach was completely fine. stomach, we can’t keep living like this bro, we gotta start assimilating at least a little bit into the normal rhythms of the human species if we wanna start feeling a little better

* don’t ask i don’t know

** pun not intended but embraced wholeheartedly

[phagodyke]

when the 3pm tired sleepies hit......

[toytulini]

carrot destruction

[slippery-minghus]

gah i think the appetite suppression from my adderall is getting worse. i had to talk myself into eating lunch today. and even then didn't have much.... and breakfast was just coffee.

and it wasn't even for ED reasons! i just. wasn't hungry. we had a potluck at work today and everything there looked about as appetizing as it would have if i'd just eaten a full meal. like grocery shopping on a full stomach. a few bites of fruit was a nice treat, but i had no desire to actually eat any of it. i was at a gas station but my fuel gauge still said the tank was full (even though it wasn't)

and all of this. was at like. 1pm? even the coffee had worn off by then.

(.....maybe i should weigh myself tomorrow. keep track of the unintentional weight loss, if it comes to that. i was lighter than i expected last time i checked.) (i see my psych next week... and i trust her not to make this into yay the fat person is losing weight!)

i just wish i knew what to do to reliably get food into my body in the mornings. my dietary restrictions limit my options for meal replacements, and i cringe at the thought of protein shakes. meal prepping breakfast is not on the table right now—i'm barely able to manage lunch and dinner. anything messy, like cereal, isn't a good fit for work. plus, i can't handle the added dirty dishes.

i just don't know what to do. i know it's a problem that i'm going nearly 20hrs between meals almost every day. i haven't started to acutely feel it yet, from this round, but it's not good. and i know in the background it's contributing to what's wearing me down. but i just. can't. fix it.

[kangals]

One step forward, one step back 😩 he did really well yesterday, ate two full meals and seemed a bit perkier, then today refuses absolutely everything and is back to being dull and depressed again. he’s so dramatic about certain things and stoic about others, it’s hard to tell where the actual source of the problem is.

[coquelicoq]

disordered eatings cw

just realized i haven't experieienced haunger in like a week and therefore i keep forgetiting to eat and that is prorbably nogt helping with my energy prohblems...turns out hunger is good for something eafter all. but i just have literally no appetite whatsoever like where did it go??

[mccoyquialisms]

he and I had a good long talk yesterday. still separated but friendly. my entire focus has now shifted into building myself up as a person and building a new life for myself. (and if I’m holding some small hope for the future, well, that’s my business.)

now that I’m not in devastating emotional turmoil every day, I can notice how fucking WEIRD my body feels on the new meds.

[ef-1]

within the measure of a day | june

[waheedawolf]

.

[queenerdloser]

any time truffle does anything remotely normal, i start bursting into tears. she crawled under my bed blanket to lay across my legs (her favorite place to sleep since she was a kitten) for the first time since monday and i had to stop writing work emails to sniffle about it. i need her to get better so i can start feeling more like a normal person again and less like a ball of stress and nerves. 

[nerdyqueerandjewish]

Cw medical stuff, weight

The other thing that was weird with the doc appointment today is that when we were talking about going off testosterone, and the changes, I mentioned that the fat redistribution changes will hopefully make things a bit easier for me - carrying my weight all in my abdomen and none in my butt makes clothing tricky. And she asked how I felt about my weight, and I was like oh, I recently came in to get labs done to make sure my health was good because I wanted to make sure it wasn’t a sign of an underlying issue. But the labs were pretty good! Slightly high A1C but we are gonna keep an eye on it and see how it goes. And she suggested weight loss medication almost immediately.

I’m so glad I have my PCP who is not weird about weight stuff because what was that