#it made me want to throw up
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physically sick over the fact that. In the game’s canon Viktor is doing whatever he can to get rid of his emotions and humanity. and it’s what him and Jayce clash over most. its the center of their entire conflict
but in arcane it’s torn away from him against his will because of Jayce. Because Jayce didn’t care what Viktor became as long as he got his partner back. Hello. Can anyone hear me
#in another life this is exactly what you would’ve wanted. but this isn’t that life and it isn’t what you want#going to THROW UP#their relationship in arcane vs the game already made me insane but oh my GOD#there are benefits to looking into the lore. like heartbreak and PAIN#dani speaks#arcane#arcane league of legends#arcane season 2#arcane season 2 spoilers#jayce talis#arcane jayce#viktor arcane#viktor#jayvik#arcane jayvik#in my heart at least
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sometimes i think about what my friend did to me and it makes me want to scream
#literally set up me to feel so gross and uncomfortable#WHY WOULD SHE DO THAT#it made me want to be invisible so bad#it made me want to throw up#i feel so betrayed because#for my friends i only want the best for them and i advise and help them accordingly#like my friend likes this guy. she tells me because im friends with him. i tell her hesa great guy and advise her on how to approach him#i would never ever put her in a high stress situation with a man she doesn’t care for or that she doesn’t know and make it explicitly a date#like thihg#NY FRIEND FUCKING DID TGAT TO ME#and im so so so so so particular about dating and romance and im actually ruthless with romantic prospects as you literally have to be#and im just in shock when i remember the man she tried to push on me i want to cry and screeam and run away for a week because WHAT THEHSGS#every time i tell a sensible person this story they are so gagged they are in genuine shock at wht happened#as they should be it was so BAD#-11029228728/10 experience#it stresses me out just to think about
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based on this:
#project draws#sonadow#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#sorry this image immediately made me want to throw up from laughing so i had to draw it
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Haven't drawn her in forever ah.
#fmab#fma#Fullmetal Alchemist#fullmetal alchemist brotherhood#lust the lascivious#my art#sorry i rarely post anymore *sobbing* *choking* *throwing up*#hope you all like it's been awhile as usual#i haven't posted anything since December want to scream#I'd been working tho so that took a lot outta me but even when I wasn't I was always so tired and didn't have the energy for art#I also made transparents for these and put them on my pixiv in a mini log
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Izumi of Jang Hui died young. She was sixteen and unwed. A kind child, protective and lonely—thus unfit for this world.
Izumi of Jang Hui was murdered. The Painted Lady was born out of hatred and grief. Her skin is painted red with the patterns of her scars. Her home is the river where the Dark Water Spirit dwells—he who found her, drowned and beautiful.
Build shrines by the river and pray for her good will. Harm her land or people and pray for mercy.
#atla#avatar the last airbender#the painted lady#atla izumi#the blue spirit#zutara#painted lady#dark water spirit#Izumi#blue spirit and the painted lady#blue spirit#new gods au#Spirit Touched! Zuko#zuko#katara#zutara au#fire nation#New Gods AU lore#Listen. LISTEN.#I have SO MUCH LORE FOR THE PAINTED LADY AND THE BLUE SPIRIT#THE LITERAL SPIRITS#kyoshi warriors au#Jian Li#Jian Li aka the original Blue Spirit found Izumi right after she died. He saved her. Made her transition into a spirit possible and smooth#The patterns of her war paint follow her scars'#Mainly so I can throw Through the Eyes of a Child's lyrics around because they'll always fit. “Scars we cover up with paint” and all#Anyways. Izumi is my child and she must be protected. I have SO many ideas for her.#I wanted her story (and Jian Li's but I'll talk about that one later) to be poetic in a sense. Especially when seen through the lense of her#story and what it means to Zuko. There's a reason it's her war paint he wears in the Kyoshi Warriors AU.#And don't get me started on the New Gods AU!
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they want to talk about mental illness and acceptance and how everyone is a little ocd it's cute and quirky and their "intrusive thoughts" are about cutting their hair off and you say yours are about taking a razorblade to your eye and they say ew can you not and everyone is a little adhd sometimes! except if you're late it's a personality flaw and it's because you are careless and cruel (and someone else with adhd mentions they can be on time, so why can't you?) and it's not an eating disorder if it's girl dinner! it's not mania if it's girl math! what do you mean you blew all of your savings on nonrefundable plane tickets for a plane you didn't even end up taking. what do you mean that you are afraid of eating. get over it. they roll their little lips up into a sneer. can you not, like, trauma dump?
they love it on them they like to wear pieces of your suffering like jewels so that it hangs off their tongue in rapiers. they are allowed to arm-chair diagnose and cherrypick their poisons but you can't ever miss too many showers because that's, like, "fuckken gross?" so anyone mean is a narcissist. so anyone with visual tics is clearly faking it and is so cringe. but they get to scream and hit customer service employees because well, i got overwhelmed.
you keep seeing these posts about how people pleasers are "inherently manipulative" and how it's totally unfair behavior. but you are a people pleaser, you have an ingrained fawn response. in the comments, you have typed and deleted the words just because it is technically true does not make it an empathetic or kind reading of the reaction about one million times. it is technically accurate, after all. you think of catholic guilt, how sometimes you feel bad when doing a good deed because the sense of pride you get from acting kind - that pride is a sin. the word "manipulation" is not without bias or stigma attached to it. many people with the fawn response are direct victims of someone who was malignantly manipulative. calling the victims manipulative too is an unfair and unkind reading of the situation. it would be better and more empathetic to say it is safety-seeking or connection-seeking behavior. yes, it can be toxic. no, in general it is not intended to be toxic. there is no reason to make mentally ill people feel worse for what we undergo.
you type why is everyone so quick to turn on someone showing clear signs of trauma but you already know the fucking answer, so what's the point of bothering. you kind of hate those this is what anxiety looks like! infographics because at this point you're so good at white-knuckling through a severe panic attack that people just think you're stoic. even people who know the situation sometimes comment you just don't seem depressed. and you're not a 9 year old white kid so there's no way you're on the spectrum, you're not obsessed with trains and you were never a good mathematician. okay then.
mental illness is trending. in 2012 tumblr said don't romanticize our symptoms but to be fair tiktok didn't exist yet. there's these series of videos where someone pretends to be "the most boring person on earth" and is just being a normal fucking person, which makes your skin crawl, because that probably means you are boring. your friend reads aloud a profile from tinder - no depressed bitches i fucking hate that mental illness crap. your father says that medication never actually works.
you still haven't told your grandmother that you're in therapy. despite everything (and the fact it's helping): you just don't want her to see you differently.
#writeblr#warm up#to be clear let me state again: i think you should id however you fucking want if it helps you seek peace#but there is a HUGE difference between being like '.... im undiagnosed but i think i might be X'#and a person who is like ''omg my intrusive thoughts made me buy a birkin!!!''#babe mine made me throw up bc they disgusted me so much <3#mine made me hurt myself evenly. even when i wanted to stop. i have had to put my hand on the stove MULTIPLE TIMES#and again i'd rather have 10000 people get help for something they don't need help for#than have 1 kid NOT get help#but there has GOTTTTT to be a middle ground here#bc at this point it isn't ''raising awareness''#it's . fucking misinformation. and ''what this picture says about you!!!!!''#& yes! im mostly talkin about ppl who are actually disgusted and offended by signs of mental illness#but use it to defend THEIR actions#like babe you hate when kids start yelling in the walmart? but you YOuRSELF can yell?#you are depressed so it's fine you were cruel to your spouse?#but if your spouse spends too much time in bed she's a lazy fuck?#your partner needs to do everything for you bc of your history in trauma? but when SHE has needs she's being clingy and gross?#HUGE difference here between whom i think most of my followers are btw. like#all it takes is fucking anyyyy empathy or kindness . like.#anyway it's hard to explain im hoping we all know the person im talking about lol
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Why do I keep seeing transmascs and trans men insisting or implying that all trans men are "female socialized," or "understand the female experience," or "navigated the world as a woman." Because yeah, sure, that can be true for some people. especially if you weren't gnc at all as a kid and didn't crack your egg until well into adulthood, it makes sense.
But they don't stop at saying they had that experience. It always comes with an addendum that trans men, as a group, all can relate to this experience. I don't know about the entirety of my demographic, but I never got even a little bit of what some of them talk about. I didn't even believe that women were scared of going out at night until I kept consistently seeing them say it, online or wherever, for years. I never realized catcalling was a thing until I saw some women complaining about it on reddit.
But they posit it as some sort of, you're safer than cis men, right? You know what it's like? Which, on top of being patently, demonstrably false in the case of myself and many other trans men, holds some unpleasant and often outright hostile implications about trans women. And they always deny it, but if you can't even conceptualize someone like me who grew up gnc, and never got the bulk (or any?) of whatever we consider to be 'female socialization,' what does that say about what you think trans girls went through, growing up? I don't want to speak for them, as I've never experienced that firsthand, but I can guarantee that (if you're even a little bit obviously trans) people don't treat you like a cis kid of the opposite gender. By and large, they don't get treated like cis boys.
It just makes me mad that we're taking this inaccurate framework that (ever so conveniently) puts trans people into the box of our assumed birth gender, and trying to fancy it up and use it with a faux-progressive veneer; never mind the way that transphobes use it to bar trans women from being athletes, or using the bathroom, or having access to any gendered resources they need. It would be bad enough to try and dust it off and use it even if it were largely accurate, due to the aforementioned connections to outright transphobia, but it literally is patently false. Not in all cases, obviously, but why are we trying to revamp this untrue, inaccurate generalization and pretend that we can make it 'trans-inclusive?'
#o.#trans#transphobia#transmisogyny#I may or may not be talking about a specific post I saw that made me irritated but I didnt wanna get in an argument with internet strangers#sorry guys I'm still heated over freaking collin allred capitulating to ted cruz and throwing trans girls under the bus bc he didnt have the#guts to stick to his morals#and called them ''this idiotic business with boys in girls sports'' or some crap#as if trans girls don't deserve to play the sports they love. like I imagine if they blocked trans men from being physicists or something#and I just wasn't able to pursue the career I want? that would destroy me#and I still had to vote for him because the other options were ted cruz and some freaking libertarian.#sorry thats all tangential but can we not use the same rhetoric that all these politicians do as an excuse to kick trans women out of public#life PLEASE 🙏#...also I really hate the Popular Transmasc Ideology that says that we all experience life as basically the same as a cis woman & never have#to navigate having male privilege & being an ally to women#and all have some sort of Innate Connection to femaleness or womanhood or whatever bc 'obviously' we all grew up just like girls do#ugh#this one's going out there sans editing so dont yell at me if I worded smth weird please 🙏
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christian men will say shit like "my rib :)" to their wives and christian women will be like "tehee, uwu" as if they aren't descended from a lineage of creators on this planet which the god of their pathetic religion is cosplaying because men still can't fucking handle the fact that they aren't the creators of life
#radblr#feminism#saw some christian guy literally propose to his girlfriend using that line and it made me want to throw up#as if a man's rib could ever create something as fucking beautiful and fearful as me#fuck off#men wish they could but all they do is make the world uglier#christianity#religion#anti religion
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GILMORE GIRLS 4.11 | In the Clamor and the Clangor
#lanekimedit#gilmoregirlsedit#gilmore girls#lane kim#dailyflicks#ohwarnette#usernivi#usersolis#usermalcfoy#mialook#alielook#useraudrey2#userroh#usermai#tuserdanni#*mine#*mygifs#fun fact this episode made me sob so bad that it makes me want to throw up#bc did y'all know that lane kim is actually the most relatable girl in the world#wanting to please your parent so bad that you'll hide yourself in every nook and cranny#just to appear like the person they so desperately want you to be#aughhhhhhh
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KYLE ADAMS as GRANTAIRE
mastered by @bikinibottomdayz
#les mis#les miserables#grantaire#kyle adams#gifset#BRUH#I SAW HIM LIVE RECENTLY#he had me giggling SO bad#his relationship with gav was one of the best parts of the show#always having a hand on his shoulder. hugging him every chance he gets. constantly having to pull gav back ...#which is totally foreshadowing gavroche running without warning for the ammo later on... and R trying to shake gav awake :(#and his relaxed nature around his friends.. jumping on feuillys lap.. kissing marius on the cheek. the light correctiv taps on his shoulder#-from the gang.. his friendship with everyone felt so real and made the final battle all the more Miserable (Haha get it)#i mean come on.. him yelling for the guards to kill him.. wanted to throw up in my seat!#oh yeah and his R is gay as hell too. Happy pride month#enjoltaire#or whatever. sorry for yapping Bye u guys#Also preston Bit him. That was really funny
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waht if i cried
#earthspark megatron#megatron#twitch malto#transformers earthspark#transformers#maccadam#i have gyatt to kms#she learned that from him...#this made me so insane i screamed#i want to talk about Twitch but im not smart enough to say what i want lel#instead i will throw up#yipee
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sry i dont know what 2 draw anymore T_T . elendira portrait #999
#trigun#trigun maximum#elendira#elendira the crimsonnail#my art#im sure u can see it but ive been so uninspired w art lately T_T#ive tried to remedy it by just looking and observing. breaking down other works that i want 2 take direction from#but i tjknk its like . just jamming ME UPPP#and now im tjinking Too much ab it and psyching myself out#help me sorry i blow up the tags on every drawing i post ab my art struggles😭😭#its like im whispering in here thouggh. just talking 2 myself and no one has 2 know except the ppl dealing w the same feelings#HAJAHA#anyways. i drew this just to say i finally drew smth agajn and im just going to be ok w it#like sure its not exciting but i like the colors and that shld be enough . OK !!!!#smth smth saw a post that talked ab how u get too in ur Head about this and then u dont share stuff and it becomes cyclical#and youll never get anywhere unless u just throw ur hands in the air and let it Be .#creating 4 the sake of creating . love and joy in sharing what we made and what we like#YAAAY#and bc i love elendira so much.. my go to girlie 4 art block#i need to draw her in fight scenes . i need 2 make art of her like sweaty and bloody yah . clenching my fist#maybe a livio fight scene bc i love it so much T_T
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I know I just got done with ranting about tfp/rid2015 starscream’s character but, if you couldn’t tell by my other rid2015 posts, I’m obsessed with rid2015 bumblebee and when I tell you I love this scene of bumblebee making fun of starscream I’m not exaggerating it’s so cathartic to me
“But bumblebee is a good/hero character, why is he being so mean—” did you forget how much starscream hurt bumblebee in tfp?
He killed cliffjumper who, while probably not as close to bee as he was to arcee, was still close friends with bee
He stole the omega keys from the autobots’ base and handed them over to megatron, practically dooming Cybertron at the time to be remade in megatron’s image — of course the autobots get them back last minute, but that doesn’t change how much that loss effected all of them (evidence: optimus shouting in anger for the first and to my memory only time in the series) — including bumblebee
And his greatest offense towards bumblebee in my opinion—
DESTROYING BUMBLEBEE’S T-COG
“But it was silas and M.E.C.H. that took it in the first place—” HE DIDN’T NEED TO HELP SILAS USE IT AFTERWARDS “but Ratchet was able to fix it—” THAT DOESN’T GET RID OF THE TRAUMA THAT WHOLE EXPERIENCE CAUSED HIM
It’s also incredibly fucked once you think about it more because the t-cog is literally a cybertronian organ — while silas is at least mostly detached from how screwed this is since it’s more like taking parts from a robot than surgery to humans, starscream shouldn’t be since he’s also a cybertronian
Instead of being freaked out and recognizing how messed up silas’ actions are like any rational bot would, he helps silas make his fake-bot-that’s-using-another-bot’s-stolen-organ work by providing him with energon (the [at the time] incredibly scarce resource that helps all bots survive) and — after that plan falls through because of bumblebee finding them — he destroys the bot’s organ for no reason other than he wanted to escape and thought that was a good way to distract him
I just—I’m sorry?? I feel like bumblebee is incredibly justified for clowning on this cringefailure of a bot for what he’s done to him
And this isn’t even mentioning what he’s done against the autobots as a whole (both on and off screen) that has probably hurt bumblebee by proxy
I feel like it’d be justified if bee also killed starscream — he already got to kill the bot that destroyed his voice box, I think bee deserves another murder as a treat <3
/joking but also what if—*gets shot by tfp/rid2015 starscream fans*
#I saw one of the posts that made me make the starscream-essay again and it annoyed me enough to make this#spite is one of the strongest motivators when paired with annoyance <3333#I don’t even hate starscream I like watching him I just find some of his fans annoying as hell I’m sorry lol#the only people who annoy me more than those kinda fans are people who ship bumblebee and starscream like—#*THROWS UP* GET THAT SHIT AWAY FROM ME NOW#even if you disregard the age difference it’s just so rancid as a pairing#WHO CAME UP WITH THAT SHIP I JUST WANT TO TALK *pulls out a shotgun* I JUST WANT TO TALK FOR A SEC#anyways bee should be allowed to tell megatron and starscream to kys <3#tfp#transformers prime#rid 15#rid 2015#rid15#rid2015#tf rid 2015#tf rid15#transformers rid2015#transformers robots in disguise#robots in disguise 2015#transformers robots in disguise 2015#tfp bumblebee#rid bumblebee#tfp starscream#rid starscream#I’m sorry yet again good starscream fans for taking up your tag but this post is literally about him so I can’t not tag him
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@hereticcryptid I appear to be slowly but surely developing an entire series about how Hensheng and Baxia apparently get fed up with their owners' inability to express their feelings and take matters into their own hands...
#mdzs#jin guangyao#nie mingjue#jgy#nmj#nieyao#very sincerely this is a concept i keep coming back to and spinning around in my head#i find it unreasonably funny i want these swords revealing every tender feeling that these two are categorically incapable of admitting to#really i just want to bring the concept of e'ming and the general embarrassment hua cheng feels for his sabre at all times and throw it#into the mdzs world#can't quite bully the concept into an actual fic but i do love thinking about it and drawing art related to it#i assume nmj nearly went completely feral the first time hensheng shot out at him#like yup! he knew jgy was a snake! he's trying to attack him while his guard is down!!! well nmj is gonna deflect this fucking weak attack#and then SKEWER jgy and there's no way lxc can hold it against him!#except rather than deflecting hensheng baxia is a horrible traitor about it and instead he ends up getting cuddled by a touch-starved sword#0/10 nmj is having a horrible day he would genuinely have prefered jgy try to kill him (jgy would have ALSO prefered that as it happens)#(nhs on the other hand is having an AMAZING day when he sees it)#my art#THANK YOU EVERYONE THAT SENT ME PROMPTS!#this seriously helped get me through the day and made my evening so much better#i shall continue to go through them tomorrow after work as well 🥰🥰🥰#hensheng
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all the tme intersex people i used to know suddenly jumping on the newest transmisogynistic bandwagon and immediately spewing all the same “ur just overreacting, you call everything transmisogyny, stop being hysterical!!!” bullshit really puts into perspective how the intersex community on here gained any traction to begin with, y’all are not immune to pulling the same bullshit perisex people do and you’re calling the intersex transfems arguing against you perisex??? just to let afabs pretend to be us so you have that idealized quiet trans woman again, like i’m sorry but this is a strawman on par with “white trans woman” nothing has changed and at some point you need to realize that your conception of what these terms mean just doesn’t reflect their actual rhetorical use in real conversations about queerness
#it’s just so fucking gross to get called perisex by someone i used to think i was in community with#the moment i was outspoken as a transfem#they hide me in one of their boxes and tell me i talk about transmisogyny too much#and like i don’t want pity i shouldn’t have trusted tme people further than i can throw them but like#i didn’t get the confidence and pride to put intersex in my url from nowhere#and yeah i had their same misconceptions at some point i understand how you get there#but i just can’t feel anything but devastatingly sad about yet another community turning on us just cuz a few transmisogynists#made an argument that flattered their egos#intersex transfems never mattered to these people#cuz the only intersex transfems they like are the afab ones that steal our culture and history and strip it of any of its meaning#and then stay quiet so they can be pointed to as ‘proof’#as if dressing up your friend as a made up animal makes it real as long as the costume stays on
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Vincent Price and Jane Asher //
The Masque of The Red Death (1964) dir. Roger Corman
#vincent price#jane asher#the masque of the red death#masque of the red death#roger corman#edgar allan poe#omg#the way his jaw clenches#fuckkk#i want him to throw me against the wall and fuck me up#what#hes so hot#so sexy#got damn#sir?#horror#bicon#old horror movies#vintage#movie#actor#handsome#gif#gifs made by me#gif set#classic horror
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