#it just made me irrationally upset

[rostii]

gave myself a headache thinking too hard about the loneliness

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

its so painfully obvious that a lot of these people have genuinely never experienced a better piece of media. it makes me sad fr. like. guy who has only ever seen the dream smp "getting a lot of dream smp vibes from this" im begging you to please go watch a horror movie from the 80s. go read a goosebumps book or a creepypasta for gods sake .

[toucansafari]

when i am upset about something that is, in the grand scheme of things,small and sort of insignificant (but highly significant to me) and someone tries to comfort me by saying it’s not a big deal or “be happy it’s only-” i only feel worse because i start to wonder if i am stupid for feeling so strongly about something so small (which doesnt seem small to me but small to everyone else).

it makes me want to smother my strong feelings about things in general because i constantly feel like i am being too much. (which totally might be the case, but i cant help but feel so)

i’d rather have someone get mad at my behalf (or get mad because they also think it’s a big deal) but that’s not what usually happens. i know people are trying to be nice and tell me that it’s only a pebble while it could have been a big rock. but for me the pebble feel as heavy as the universe itself. especially when i see pebbles everywhere.

it’s the same when i get excited about something and no one else does, because then i feel like an idiot for being so hyped about something that’s evidently not a big deal for everyone else. i know i mustn’t worry about these things and do what i want anyway but it’s like being on the wrong side of the boss in an aoe (while everyone else is on the safe zone) and i feel like soon i will be burnt because of it.

i know these are somewhat irrational thoughts but of late i’ve been feeling them more and more.

[connormoving]

im like a tually so uoset abt several stupid things rn

[monster-effer]

HIIII.. your write rlly good for autistic reader so i would like to request lads boys with an autistic reader that gets overstimulated and accidentally gets angry them? when i am overstimulated i get really angry so i feel bad,,, (hi fellow autistic gals)

Thank you so much 🥰 and yes I can!

In all of these headcanons, it is assumed that each love interest is aware that the reader is autistic and experiences overstimulation on occasion.

Sylus – temperature dysregulation (hot)

It was midsummer in Linkon and you feel like you are boiling in your flesh suit.

You have always had issues with temperature regulation. You get hot from the smallest amount of physical exertion, from eating warm foods, or being outside long enough when the sun is shining. And then you begin to sweat. Being hot and sweaty makes you irrationally angry, and you can’t help it.

Usually, you bring a portable fan and wear tank tops to avoid becoming a sweaty mess. In the summer even these things don’t save you. And today is one of those days.

You are out with Sylus at a summer market in Linkon city. He is wearing a pair of dark sunglasses, a tank top, shorts and sandals as you two peak at the stalls you pass by.

You were so hyped when you first got here because usually Sylus is sleeping during this time of day. But he was willing to sacrifice his sleeping schedule to see you smile.

You have been walking around for an hour, indulging in free samples being handed out and stopping at any stall that catches your eye.

But your blissful afternoon is interrupted by the all too familiar feeling of your body heating up past the point of comfort. You feel agitated and upset that you can’t just enjoy a day out without heating up and getting sweaty. And unfortunately your irritation leaks into your conversation with Sylus.

“Which booth would you like to check out next kitten?”

You let out an audible sigh before replying. “Why do I always have to choose?” you ask harsher than you would have liked.

Sylus pauses at your tone and takes in your body language. Your face looks flushed, you’re starting to fan yourself with your hands, and you have an adorable grumpy expression on your face. He knows what this means.

Instead of commenting he begins to steer you back towards the parking lot, so he can get you back home in a cool environment. He also makes sure to turn on your AC via the smart thermostat he installed in your apartment.

“The booths are that way you know,” you say quietly.

“I know sweetie, but right now I think it’s time for us to go home.”

Instead of acknowledging his response with an answer you focus on fanning yourself with your hands. And lifting your arms up so your armpits can get some air. You blessedly arrive at his motorcycle and after a quick ride you are home once again.

When you arrive back at your apartment you sigh in relief because the air conditioner is already on. Without saying a word, you head to your room and begin to strip down to your undies so you can cool down completely.

Sylus walks to your kitchen to get you a glass of water with ice in it, he’s very familiar with this routine. After giving you a few minutes alone, he brings you the glass of water with adoration in his eyes.

“…I’m sorry. I got so hot and it made me upset. You didn’t deserve me taking it out on you.”

Sylus leans towards you and gives you a smooch.

“I forgive you. Now, drink this glass of water and continue to cool down for me okay?”

Zayne – being tired + in pain

You are beyond tired, there is a large gash on your leg and you’re sitting in urgent care at Akso hospital. The mission you just completed was rough to say the least. As you sit in the waiting room marinating in your misery, you decide that you’ll request a vacation once you’re all patched up.

You can almost feel your social skills slip through your fingers. It’s taking more effort than usual to keep up the niceties when you interact with the hospital staff, but you manage to do it. Just barely.

And when you are finally ushered into a room, the bright fluorescent lights instantly give you a raging headache.

As you close your eyes and cradle your head in your hands you consider going home instead of waiting for the doctor to come in.

You hear the door open, someone walk in then the door close once again. But you don’t bother looking up.

“What damage has your body sustained this time?”

Zayne’s voice is usually very soothing to you. But today his voice feels as smooth as sandpaper on your nerves. You cannot take his teasing at this moment because way too much is going on. You are overwhelmed.

“It’s not like I seek out ways to get hurt you know,” you reply petulantly.

Before he can reply, you can’t stop yourself from continuing “Also who thought it was a good idea to install these blinding lights? My eyes feel like they’re going to explode.”

Zayne silently observes you as he lets you vent. He turns off the lights in the room and opens the curtains so now there is only soft light coming in from the setting sun.

He then turns to you and speaks in a hushed tone. “Is this natural lighting more tolerable? I had to open the curtains so I can inspect your wound.”

You nod your head.

“Let me clean up and cover your wound then I will grab some aspirin for your headache.”

With the threat of the overhead lights gone, you finally open your eyes and look towards Zayne. “Zayne, I’m sorry for snapping at you. Everything just felt like too much at once.”

Zayne lets a small smile reach his lips. “I can tell when you’re overstimulated my love. No need to be sorry for things that are outside of your control. You were my last patient for the day, let’s go home together.”

Rafayel – crowded places

You are attending one of Rafayel’s gallery shows near the beach.

You, for the most part, came to support your lovely boyfriend but you also came at the urging of Thomas because “If you don’t come, Rafayel will not show up.”

The gallery is more packed than usual, with the news of Rafayel making an appearance spreading like wildfire through the news.

Rafayel is currently occupied by conversation with someone interested in buying one of his paintings. You wander over to the refreshment table to grab another flute of champagne.

You feel antsy from the amount of people at this gallery showing. The sensation of being trapped is putting you on edge. As you chew on your bottle lip and take a sip of your drink, you contemplate making a quick exit and apologizing to Rafayel later.

As you scope out the exits, you hear his familiar voice behind you. “Where are you heading off to cutie?”

Your heart is pounding in your chest, and you feel like you are under attack. “Coming here was a mistake. I feel like I can’t breathe,” you say quickly. You avoid his gaze because you know your words hurt him.

Before he can reply you rush out of the gallery and make your way down towards the beach before plopping down on the sand. Your dress be damned.

Watching the waves lap against the sand helps center you. After a few minutes you hear the crunch of sand as someone approaches you. You know it’s Rafayel because he is the only person who sits so close to you, both of your knees touching.

Both of you are quiet for a beat because he speaks up. You tense as you ready yourself for the backlash of your harsh words. But you are surprised at what he says.

“It really hurts when you run away from me” Rafayel says in a soft tone.

You feel like a piece of shit because you know Rafayel has abandonment issues. And you unintentionally played into them this evening.

You feel even worse once you look in his direction and see his signature pout and puppy dogs in full effect.

“Rafayel I’m so sorry. I thought I could handle being around all those people but it became too much for me to handle.”

Hearing your sincere apology softens the blow of your actions. “I figured that’s what happened. We didn’t expect there to be such a large turnout for this showing.”

“You know I would never purposefully put you in a situation that causes you distress, right?”

“I know.”

You two sit in companionable silence after reconciling.

“Do you want to take a stroll along the beach with me?”

“Don’t you have to stay at the gallery showing?”

“Ehh, Thomas can take it from here,” he replies nonchalantly.

With that you two stand up and walk hand in hand along the sand.

Caleb –loud noises

You are enjoying the atmosphere at the Linkon New Year festival with Caleb.

You still can’t believe that he’s back in your life after believing that he was dead for a year straight.

You have exhausted yourself from trying to visit every booth.

Before you know it, it is nighttime, and everyone is walking towards the open lawn to watch the fireworks show.

You turn to Caleb to ask if he wants to leave when he interrupts you by speaking first. “Will you be okay with watching the fireworks show before we head home?”

You swallow your own question after seeing the smile on his face, you don’t have the strength to deny him anything. But you’re not sure if you can handle how loud things are going to get.

“Sure,” you say with a tight smile as you dig through your bag for your earplugs. Your heart drops when you recall that you changed bags this morning. You are now woefully without ear protection. You feel like crying but decide to push through, not wanting to disappoint Caleb.

The fireworks show starts off fairly tame. But the loud boom from each firework frays your nerves and fills you with anxiety and dread. You feel like a cornered animal in a cage.

Caleb suddenly gets close to your ear. “What’s the matter pipsqueak?” He shouts in an attempt to be heard over the continuous fireworks.

The volume of his voice makes you jump and shout back “Get away from me!” Before you take off running through the crowd, towards the parking lot. This moment reminds him of a time in your childhood when you reacted the same way. You were overwhelmed and he refused to leave you alone in this state.

Caleb extensive exercise regimen kicks in as he catches up to you in no time. You have shakily climbed into the passenger seat of your car.

When he gets into the driver’s seat, he turns towards you with concern furrowing his brow.

“How are you feeling?”

“I feel okay now,” you reply quietly.

“Maybe we should look for some new earplugs for you. They didn’t seem to help much during the fireworks show.”

“I forgot to bring them with me today.”

“Ahh well that explains it. Why didn’t you mention it to me? We could have left early”

“I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

Caleb sighs and shakes his head in amusement. “You could never disappoint me princess. Let’s go home. I’ll make you some chamomile tea when we get there.”

You nod your head and buckle your seatbelt. The ride back to your apartment is filled with companionable silence. Nothing else needs to be said. Caleb accepts you for who you are, and he prioritizes your wellbeing above all else.

Xavier – lack of sleep

It took:

six fucking days

to track down and kill a wanderer that was causing havoc in remote town.

You learned during your investigation that this wanderer appears randomly, but always at night. You and Xavier have been taking turns patrolling.

You learned during your investigation that this wanderer appears randomly, but always at night. You and Xavier have been taking turns patrolling.

Your body, mind and soul are beyond exhausted. And you feel ready to take a week long nap in your bed.

As you finish compiling your report you are fighting to keep your eyes open. Once you send your report to Jenna you see Xavier approaching your desk from your peripheral vision.

“Hey, do you want to stop at the hot pot restaurant on the way home?”

The irritation you feel from lack of sleep reaches a boiling point. You don’t know what comes over you, but you just snap.

“Do you ever think of anything besides food? I am going home then straight to bed.”

Although it felt good to release that pressure and frustration. You regret directing it towards Xavier, especially when you look his way.

The soft and open expression you’ve grown accustomed to is gone and replaced with the blank and closed off one that he wore when you first met him. His lips are tensed in a straight line and his beautiful blue eyes are intently focused on you.

As you open your mouth to try to salvage things, Xavier interrupts you.

“Okay. How about I get us both home and while you sleep I’ll put some takeout in your fridge? When you wake up you won’t have to make anything,” he says in a monotone voice.

You feel tears pricking your eyes. Xavier is incredibly understanding even during the moments you misdirect your anger towards him.

“That sounds good. Thank you for being patient with me.”

“Like my love, my patience for you is limitless. Let’s leave, you need your rest.”

[blueberrylemontea-fanfic]

Cassandra

Pairing: wolfstar x fem!reader

Summary: You get upset when Sirius flirts with someone else. You get into a fight. You make up.

Warnings: 18+, SMUT (threesome, slight dom!Remus), little bit of angst, arguing, readers exit gets blocked briefly

You were pissed.

Deep down, you knew you were overreacting, but you were still pissed.

You knew Sirius was a flirty person, always had been. And you knew he didn't mean it. It normally didn't bother you, but this time felt different.

You knew for a fact that he'd had a crush on Cassandra a while back. It also didn't help that she was kind of amazing, not to mention gorgeous…

You'd tried to get the image out of your head of Sirius leaning over her against the wall, laughing with her… But it was like it was tattooed on your corneas. It was all you'd been thinking about that afternoon.

It didn't help that you'd been studying with Remus in their dorm and that Sirius was acting completely oblivious. As well as annoying. He was restless, constantly distracting Remus and you from your work.

"Come oooon," he whined. "You've been at this all afternoon. Let's do something fun."

"Think you've had enough fun for the day," you muttered under your breath.

"What was that, love?" Sirius perked up.

"Nothing," you waved him off.

He raised an eyebrow as his eyes wandered over you.

It irrationally infuriated you that he'd only just noticed your mood.

"Everything alright, deary?"

You nodded. "Yeah, why wouldn't it be?"

Just because he noticed, didn't mean you wanted to talk about it.

Sirius knelt down in front of your chair. "You sure? You don't seem…"

"Seem what?" You snapped.

Remus put his book down at that. "Siri's right, love, you don't seem quite alright today. Anything you want to talk to us about?"

You let out a sigh. You really didn't like that Remi was getting caught in the middle of this, but you also really weren't ready to have this talk. "It's nothing, really, I'm fine."

"Hey, don't do that," you chastised as the boys exchanged a worried look. "You don't want to believe me, that's fine. I'll just go." You haphazardly gathered up your stuff and shoved it in your bag, ready to storm out.

"Oh, come on, deary, please don't leave." Sirius grabbed your wrist but you pulled out of his grip instantly.

"Please don't leave like this," he whispered.

"Just talk to us." The softness of him made your stomach drop, but you couldn't bear talking through these insecurities right now.

Remus brushed a lock of hair behind your ear. "You're worrying us a little bit, darling. Would you please stay and talk?"

You shook your head.

"Are you mad? Did we do something?" Sirius was getting desperate. He hated fighting with the people close to him.

You bit your tongue, willing your eyes not to well up. "I've got to go."

You crossed the dorm, but Sirius beat you to the door.

"Siri, get out of the way…" You sighed, but Sirius wasn't planning on moving any time soon.

"No. Not until you tell us what's going on!"

"Sirius…" Remus tried to intervene.

"No, Remi, she can't leave like this. There's clearly something going on."

You were starting to lose your patience. "Sirius, get out of my way."

"Not until you tell me what's wrong!" Sirius yelled.

"I don't have to tell you everything that goes on in my head, y'know? You're not entitled to my every thought!" You screamed back at him. You were about to lose your temper.

"Darling, I love you, and there's something wrong. I just wanna help. Just want you to be okay."

"I've told you, I'm fine. I clearly don't want to talk. Now step away from the goddamn door!"

You knew Sirius. He was not relenting. He had sunk his teeth in, and that meant he wasn't letting go. You also knew he was spiralling, going over all the worst case scenarios of how this could end. And if only that image of him and Cassandra hadn't been dancing in front of your eyes, you probably would have stopped to soothe him. But you couldn't bring yourself to do it, now.

You knew there was only one way you were going to get past him. And so, you whipped your wand out of your boot. "Don't make me do this, Sirius." You were almost pleading.

Sirius' confused, hurt look was a punch in the gut, but he really wasn't leaving you any other options.

"Y/n…" He started.

"I don't want to talk to you right now, Sirius. Now, for the last time, let me out of here."

Finally, Remus swooped in, pushing Sirius behind him and opening the door.

You silently stormed out the door, leaving your two bewildered boys behind.

***

You had ignored your boys all throughout the next day, rushing out of every class before they'd even packed their books.

You'd done a pretty good job of it, until there was a knock on the door of your dorm that evening, and you were greeted with two sheepish faces.

"Hi," Remus started tentatively.

"Hi."

"Can we talk?" You looked back into your dorm, which was decidedly not empty. "Are Prongs and Wormtail in?"

"They're in the common," Remus answered.

You nodded measuredly. "Alright, let's go to your dorm."

There had never been tension between you like there was now. It vaguely reminded you of before you got together, when being around each other was all tense and electric. Merlin, were you missing that electricity now...

You plopped down on Remus' bed, fiddling with your thumbs. "So..."

"I'm so sorry," Sirius burst out.

"Merlin, love, I'm so so sorry, I don't know what I was thinking." Sirius sunk down onto the floor in front of you.

"It's okay, Siri," you started, but he interrupted you. "It's not, though. That was not okay. I am truly sorry, love."

You ran your hand through his hair. "Apology accepted, Siri. I'm sorry I pulled my wand on you."

"Didn't leave you much of a choice, did I? I promise, nothing like that will ever happen again."

You nodded. "I know."

Remus sat down next to you. "It's alright if you don't want to talk, dove, we're certainly not looking for a repeat of yesterday, but we're still a little worried. I promise I won't ask again after this, but, is anything bothering you, dear?"

Now that you'd cooled down, you found it much harder to lie to your boys, but you felt so silly admitting that this whole thing happened because Sirius talked to another witch...

"It's stupid, really... I'm just overreacting..."

"Hey, love, anything you're feeling, you know we want to know."

You sighed, burying your head in your hands. "I guess I was feeling a little pissed off."

Sirius' arm wrapped around your shoulders as he sat down on your other side. "Did something happen?"

You cast a sideways glance his way. "This is gonna sound so silly... I just, I saw you talking to Cassandra Fieldwake."

Sirius just looked at you expectantly, still clueless.

"And I guess I just got a bit jealous, is all..."

"Wait, what?" Sirius' eyes went wide. "You were jealous?"

You shrugged. "Well, I mean... Cassandra's great and you used to carry a massive torch for her, and then the two of you looked so flirty, and I know, you're a flirty person, so I just need to get over it..."

"Woah, no," Sirius interrupted, "you don't have to get over anything. I'm sorry I made you feel this way, but, darling, you've got less than nothing to worry about. I am crazy about you."

"I know... I just got insecure," you shrugged. Instantly, your boys wrapped you in a giant hug. "We are so incredibly lucky to have you, darling, we'd be out of our heads to look elsewhere."

"Really?"

"Of course, darling. You're perfect. I haven't so much as thought of another girl since I first kissed you."

"Oh, come on, now you're exaggerating," you rolled your eyes.

"Moony?" Sirius called out.

"He has not shut up about you for the past year-and-a-half. It would've been seriously annoying if I hadn't been so completely head over heels for you as well," Remi smiled, making you blush.

"You know what, Pads?" The drop in Remus' voice caught you off guard.

"I think we need to remind our little dove that she's our number one girl."

Sirius eyes glinted mischievously. "Y'know what, Moony, I think you're right."

You gasped when both of them launched an attack on your neck. You never got used to their hands all over you, it felt spectacular every damn time.

Remus softly guided you onto your back. He kissed you so deeply it made your head spin.

Before you could open your eyes, Sirius took Remus' place. They did this often, but you could always tell.

Remus' hand snaked under your shirt, toying with your breasts before undoing your shirt. You unhooked your bra with one hand and quickly tossed it aside. Moments later, your boys were all over your chest. Merlin, they never stopped looking like they belonged in a porno with the way their backs arched as they ravaged your chest.

"Shirts," you moaned. "Shirts off, please."

"So needy," Moony chuckled, but he took his shirt and tie off immediately. He helped Sirius undo his tie, pulling him in for a kiss while he was at it.

Soon, you were all shirtless, and Remus and Sirius were back on you. Sirius' hand palmed your thighs, working his way up to cup your heat.

"Siri..." You moaned.

"Tell him what you want, love," Remus cooed in your ear.

"Fuck, Siri, I want you to touch me."

Sirius didn't move his hand. "Like this, dove?"

You groaned in frustration. "I want you inside of me," you sighed.

Remus bit your earlobe. "Beg him."

"Remi..." You whined.

"Don't test me, dove," his voice was low in your ear and sent a shiver down your spine.

"Please, Siri, please touch me, I need your fingers in me so badly, darling..."

Sirius groaned at your words, making quick work of discarding the remainder of your clothes. His finger trailed over you and he groaned again. "She's so wet, Remi, so pretty, you've got to see her."

But Remus was too busy lavaging your upper body with kisses. "Our girl's the prettiest," he said in between kisses. "She looks even prettier when she's cumming, though. How about you make our girl feel good, Pads."

Sirius licked his lips. "Gladly."

You gasped as two of his digits plunged into you. Sirius knew exactly what you liked, his fingers angled just so in that way that made your eyes roll to the back of your head. His tongue rolled over your clit and you grabbed onto his hair.

"Do that again, Siri," you mewled.

Sirius happily obliged. "Think you can take one more, love?"

You nodded.

Sirius' third finger stretched you out gloriously.

"You're taking him so well, dove. Such a good girl for us," Remus was whispering encouragements in your ear. "Is Pads getting you there, darling?" He didn't need an answer, he knew your body by heart, but he demanded one anyway.

"I'm so close, Remi. Siri, please don't stop."

"Wouldn't dream of it, darling." Sirius was hitting that exact spot in you, your hands clutching at the sheets. When he did that thing with his tongue again, you were done for. Your back arched of the bed as you came on Sirius' fingers.

"So damn beautiful, dove." Remus' voice sounded strained.

Sirius let you ride out your orgasm on his fingers before slowly pulling them out, holding them out for Remus, who sucked them into his mouth eagerly. "Taste so good sweetheart. Merlin, Pads, move over, gotta taste her."

And just like that, Sirius was cuddled next to you, while Remus knelt down at the edge of the bed, lapping you up hungrily.

"Mmm, Remy, slow down." You tugged on his hair. "Sensitive," you breathed out.

" 'M sorry, lovely, but you should see yourself... You're so damn irresistible." He dove right back between your legs.

You were used to reigning Remus in by his hair. You'd learned quickly that there was few things he liked better than getting his hair pulled. You were a moaning mess as Remus quickly brought you close another orgasm, and then kept you there.

"Remi..." You whined. "Remi, darling, please. Please!"

Remus' taunting eyes looked back at you. "Please what, love?"

"Please make me cum, Remi, please."

He smirked devilishly. "Soon."

His tongue was flush against you, you were struggling against him. "Hold her still, Pads." Remus growled. Sirius kissed you deeply before moving down to your hips, holding you down to the mattress as he kissed your lower stomach.

"Remi," your breath hitched in your throat, as Remus once again brought you right to the edge. "Please!"

But Remus was never one to give in to your pleas so easily. He was going to use you like his little plaything until he was satisfied, and then he would let you cum. There was nothing more for you to do but give in to him. You relaxed into his touch, your body completely at his mercy. Remus brought you back until all you could do was moan out the word please, tears rolling down your cheeks.

Sirius was whispering affirmations in your ear the entire time. "Such a good girl, love, doing so well. You're so good for us."

"Isn't she, Pads? Such a good girl," Remus smirked. "Does our good girl want to cum?"

"Yes!" You cried out. "Yes, please, Remi, please!"

Remus' tongue dug into you, and this time, he wasn't stopping until your nails were scraping his scalp, hips bucking against Sirius' grip. You threw your head back, a silent scream on your lips as your orgasm crashed into. You held Remus in place until your orgasm subsided, his soft kitten licks guiding you back to earth.

When you caught your breath, your boys were cuddling you, peppering soft kisses across your cheeks.

"Fuck me, darling..."

"So damn perfect."

You grabbed Remus' hair again as you pulled him in for a slow kiss. "I love you, Remi," you whispered.

"I love you, too, dove."

You turned to kiss Sirius as well. "I love you, Siri."

He smiled fondly at you. "I love you too, deary, so, so much."

You watched in awe as your two boys kissed each other, exchanging their own I love you's.

Sirius bent back over you, his nose rubbing against yours. "You know we're not done with you, right, deary?"

You gasped as they tossed you further onto the bed, landing on your stomach. Remus warm breath in your ear made you shiver.

"You didn't think we were passing up this chance to fuck you, did you, love?"

He playfully bit your earlobe as you giggled.

"You gonna fuck me good, Remi?" You challenged.

"You bet your ass, lovey."

You yelped as Remus' hand struck you across the bottom.

"We're going to make you feel so good." Sirius bit your bottom lip as he slid in beneath you. He gathered some of the wetness between your legs and spread it over his length. "Merlin, I can't wait to fuck you."

Before you could even say the words 'then don't', Sirius was pushing into you.

"Fuck, Siri!" You cried out.

Sirius moved slowly, letting you adjust to him while Remus sidled up against your back. "I love you, darling," he whispered as he slowly started working open your ass.

"I love you too, Remi," you moaned. "You too, Siri."

Sirius pulled you in for a kiss. He sucked on the sweet spot behind your ear as Remus slowly pushed inside you. You let out a sigh at the feeling. Whenever they were inside you, you felt so gloriously full that it made you forget why you were ever not fucking them.

"You guys feel so good, fuck, you make me feel so damn good, I love you so much." You moaned as they started moving into you.

"Fuck, Remi, I can feel you," Sirius groaned.

"Me too, Pads. Feels good."

They moved into you in unison, quickly setting a pace that was setting your skin on fire. But still, you wanted more. "Fingers," you managed to breath out.

Sirius sneered. "Would you look at that, Moony, our little dove's not satisfied until all her holes are stuffed full."

"Such a little whore," Remus laughed into your ear. He spanked your ass roughly. "Go on, Siri, give her what she needs."

Sirius held out two of his fingers, watching as you eagerly sucked them into your mouth. You sucked Sirius' fingers, wishing it was one of their cocks instead.

"Merlin,  Remi, look at her. She's taking me so well... I'm not gonna last much longer," Sirius' breathing was getting shallow.

Remus grabbed your hips, fucking you into them. You were so impossibly full. Your moans no longer made it out of your throat, they just had you choking on Sirius' fingers.

Remus grabbed Sirius' free hand and put in on your hip, replacing his own hand. Sirius' fingers dug into you as he desperately tried to hold off his orgasm. Remus noticed, reaching around you to grab Sirius' chin. "Don't you dare come before she does, you hear me."

Sirius nodded roughly. "I won't, Moony, promise."

"Good boy," Remus purred.

"Are you close, darling?"

You tried to answer, gagging on Sirius' fingers. Remus grabbed your chin. "Answer me, dear."

"Yes, so close, Remi," you managed to get out.

"Good girl. Keep sucking Paddies fingers like the good little whore you are."

You nodded vigorously.

They were pounding into you so hard you were practically bouncing on their cocks. You were so, so close. The kiss Remus planted on your shoulder warned you that he was going in for the kill. His free hand travelled down your side, teasing your inner thighs before pressing down on your clit.

You threw your head back onto Remus' shoulder as you came. You were completely overwhelmed, choking on Sirius' fingers as Remus was still rubbing your clit. They hadn't slowed down their pace, still fucking into you, chasing their own highs as you squeezed them deliciously.

They came with a string of profanity falling from their lips, Sirius throwing his head back and Remus biting down on your shoulder.

"Fucking hell, love," Sirius smiled as he fell back onto the bed.

"You did so well, darling," Remus guided you down onto the mattress as well.

"Such a good girl." He kissed your temple and cleaned the three of you up before falling back onto the bed, too.

"You feeling better, deary?" Sirius whispered into your ear.

You nodded. "Feeling incredible, Siri. Nothing but incredible."

"Sleep over?" Remus nuzzled his face into your neck.

"Gladly."

[revelboo]

Everything is Alright pt 13

Starscream x Reader-feelings

• Something’s shifted between one of your heartbeats to the next and Starscream doesn’t understand what it is. What’s changed or how to fix it. He just knows that it’s getting under his plating in a decidedly unsettling way. He hates it.

• The entire trip back, you’re silent, not looking at him or Soundwave. Not exactly ignoring them, just distant. Then you ask to sleep in that little bed Soundwave gave you rather than on his chassis even though he knows you’re cold. You’re always complaining about the cold, seeking out his warmth. And he hadn’t realized how accustomed he’s grown to the soft weight of you against him or the sound of your breathing while he recharges. As silly as it is, he needs it.

• The next day, you smile at him when he wakes you, but it’s wrong. It’s empty and his spark constricts. He runs a palm over his helm, wings fidgeting. Angry because this is the only good thing he has. And it’s slipping through his servos and he doesn’t even know why. “I don’t care if you hate me,” he snarls, servos curling under into fists. He can’t reach for you, afraid that he might accidentally break you. “But can you at least have the decency to tell me why?”

• It’s that rough, angry plea that breaks you. Like he honestly has no idea why. Like he can’t fathom why you’d be upset at all. Your fingers close on one of your pillows and you chuck it at him, wanting to scream. His optics narrow as the projectile just bounces off and you wonder if maybe this will be it. That he’ll finally decide you’re more trouble than you’re worth. If it is, you might as well let it all out. “I’m not a pet, okay? I’m a person- I had a life!” You sling the other pillow at him, suddenly, irrationally angry and on the verge of tears again. Sure, you’d hated your job and your ex. Your life may not have been glamorous, but it’d been yours. Not his to take away.

• His hand comes down, gently forcing you down, pinning you to the bed on your back as his servos cage you and he leans into your space. Oh, you definitely made him mad. “And that life is mine now,” he says, voice a dark, rasping threat. “You’re just a little bird in a cage and I prefer a happy pet.”

• There it is. Something besides that empty, apathy. Starscream grits his denta as you glare at him like you can hurt him that way. If only you knew. Even if it’s all a lie, he wants you to play along. Needs it so bad it hurts. Smile for him, talk to him. Hate him if you must, but be there. Be you. Because even if you hate him, he can lie, too.

• He can pretend because it’s all he has and he can’t give it up just yet.

Previous Next

[ashen-char]

dating anora mikheeva hcs 🔞

ship: anora mikheeva (anora) x gender neutral reader

notes: a mix of nsfw and sfw so 🔞

✦ ani doesn't talk about the club much when she's at home. she wants to just chill with you, have a space where she doesn't have to even think about that

✧ at most, ani complains about the schedule, about how diamond's on her ass about perceived client-poaching. the creeps and weirdos? they don't deserve her attention, not when she's with you

✧ whenever you're curious to visit, she shuts it down fast. she likes that you don't know what her work persona is like. likes that (besides the fucking irresistible clothes she brings home) you haven't seen any of it

✧ with you she's free to be anora. your girlfriend, sometimes clumsy sometimes making ill-advised decisions. always going with her heart rather than needing her guard up

✧ ani doesn't mind doing personal strip teases for you though. but she makes sure to make them nothing like what she does for work. with you, it's foreplay, no money, just to see that desire in your eyes that's all for her

✧ and she feels secure knowing that you don't view her as a piece of meat or a sex object. she can show you her latest choreo idea and you wouldn't escalate things, knowing there's a time and a place for those things

✦ anora is passionate and expressive, wearing her heart on her sleeve and not afraid to show you the depth of her feelings

✧ which is why she fucking hatesss when someone's fake and not upfront with her

✧ whenever you're avoiding questions or are hiding something, she's on you like a hawk, making you spit it out so you can deal with it Together. whatever it is

✦ you catch her humming russian lullabies to herself, and when you ask her what it is, anora gets frustrated with herself because she doesn't remember why she knows it, or the words

✦ anora is a hopeless romantic. love at first sight, soulmates, call her naïve but she sees no issue in dreaming about that once in a lifetime love. she'll never regret striving for it (even if it gets her in situations that she does end up regretting)

✧ as such, your girl is a sucker for romance movies, especially anything to do with disney (pirated of course, fuck big corporations) and will make you watch them with her over and over

✦ ani hoards jewelry, especially whatever you give her. cheap, flashy, whatever. she likes being able to wear them and think of you

✦ BIG reality TV fan. the drama makes her feel like her own life is calmer in comparison plus she loves shitting on the weirdo dudes with the HQ girls

✧ ani swears that if she ever got cast on a reality show, she'd be the fan-favourite or the villain Easily. and she's a-ok with either as long as people have fun watching her

✧ competition shows, talent shows, whatever the ones following one family/cast are called (like bling empire or kardashians), she'll watch anything.

✧ ani gets overly invested into reality TV couples and she especially loves to get you hooked on them. such a sense of pride when you finally admit that yes, you actually were eavesdropping and yes, you wanna know what they're arguing about now

✧ big soft spot for underdog characters (especially if they're old or have a sad backstory) and she gets irrationally angry or even upset for days if they get eliminated

✦ ani gets easily attached to cheap stuffed animals she wins from claw machines and refuses to throw them away even when she's made a pile that makes it hard for you to navigate the bedroom

✧ and let me be clear, she is NOT good at these claw games. she blows way more money than it would've cost to just buy the toy in the first place. but it's about the thrill of the win!

✦ ani has a sharp memory for faces and names, a skill she picked up from working in HQ

✧ and your girl? she holds a grudge. she'll remember she hates someone from an incident years ago and refuse to go back there, even if she forgot what words were actually exchanged

✦ anora always goes to the nail salon and treats herself to a mani-pedi, every two weeks

✧ it makes her feel more like herself, more put-together, more like a person. if she doesn't have at least nail polish on, she'll complain to you that she feels all naked

✧ she tends to go for bright colours or sparkly decals, to lighten up tough days

✦ anora refuses to cry in front of people, but you know she's a softie. she says she doesn't mind you knowing, for whatever reason, because she's alright feeling vulnerable around you. you're a safe space

✧ the first time you ever saw her cry was when her birthday rolled around and her mother sent a very heartfelt and sweet birthday message - basically saying that she wished she could be there, that ani should come visit soon, that she misses her baby girl

✧ she's a big animal softie too. she especially has a soft spot for stray cats and always stops to feed them if she has extra food. if vera wasn't so allergic, ani would sneak all of them home

✧ ani tells you about how as a kid she wanted a pet so badly that she was at her best friend's house 24/7 to play with their dog. and she'd offer every weekend to give him a bath, take him on walks

✦ ani loves amusement parks, not for the rides but for the feeling of being surrounded by excitement and energy

✧ especially a theme park. she's not the type to get embarrassed that it's "for kids", she'd definitely start up conversations with the mascot actors and take heaps of pictures

✦ ani makes playlists for basically everything, every mood, vibe, or situation she's in

✧ the one she puts on all the time is "main character energy"

✧ the habit started because she likes making her own dance mixes, but it creeps into your personal lives as well. she insists on having the AUX cord if you go on a road trip, for example

✧ and you know her sexy times playlist is hot as fuck. whenever she hears any of them on the club on the radio, she thinks of you and sends sexts about how she wishes you were there right now to deal with her sudden arousal

✦ her favourite position used to be riding, either cowgirl or reverse. she liked how it let her control the pace, the angle, and the depth

✧ plus it showed off her dancer's flexibility. she could lean back and arch her spine, roll her hips sensually, using her core strength to grind her clit against your pubic bone in just the right way to drive you both crazy with desire

✧ the power and control of straddling you and riding until you both reached their peak... that's a common fantasy for ani

✧ anora loves the proud feeling that blooms in her chest when she's bouncing on you and she watches your face contort with pleasure. all because of her. the sight is so fulfilling for her

✧ she knows what she likes. her most mind blowing orgasms is when she's setting the pace and making sure you're hitting the spot

✦ but with you, she's grown an appreciation for more intimate positions. the ones that used to make her feel too vulnerable and she thought she disliked. turns out she just needed the right person to try it with

✧ now, ani loves being held close and wrapped up in your arms as you take her from behind, spooning her. it reminds her of lazy mornings where you can't get enough of her, because you just need her that early

✧ plus she loves loves loves the neck kisses you sneak in that way, or how you reach around to mess with her clit

✧ it feels so much more intimate and sensual when you're pulling her body flush against yours. she always gasps so prettily when you slowly rock into her

✦ anora loves overpriced coffee shop drinks, even when she complains about how much they cost. she gets so many vanilla and caramel shots in it because she's got the world's biggest sweet tooth

✧ speaking of her sweet tooth, you learned early on in your relationship that the easiest way to get her to forgive you or to go along with plans is to promise a sweet treat

✧ she's too lazy to go grocery shopping with you? maybe there's a bakery with the best bear claws right across the road. accidentally raised your voice while you two were play-arguing? nothing a slice of cake can't fix

✧ you seriously wonder how she's never had a cavity when half of her diet is sweets and vape smoke

✦ as much as she loves new york city, ani daydreams about running away to a small town but never does because she knows she’d be bored in less than a week

✧ but during pillow talk, she paints such vivid images to you about what it'd be like to live there together, in a little cottage where you two are self-sufficient

✧ solar panels and water tanks, of course. some chickens in your yard to collect eggs for breakfast every morning. a swing hanging from a big tree where you two can push your kid

✧ anora is a dreamer, constantly envisioning your future together

✧ the details and specifics change day to day, but what she does know is that the life she wants to build is one with you by her side

[sugawarassoulmate]

a few of y'all asked me about this ages ago and i always had the thought in my head but i never actually wrote it down.

but y'all really liked the idea of loser!kuroo and virgin!mean!reader

word count: 845 cw: fem!reader, virgin!reader, name calling, bullying, fingering, implied oral (f receiving), minors dni

virgin!mean!reader who everyone thinks is experienced and she's never bothered to correct them

even kuroo thinks she has a couple bodies under her belt when she starts tormenting him on the daily

she's just so cool and beautiful and everyone is afraid of her but lowkey wants to spend a night with her????

but some things are a bit off

whenever kuroo gets too close to reader during their study sessions and his tall, imposing, figure completely towering over reader when he leans in to ask a question, he notices for some reason you can't look him in the eye

sometimes reader kisses kuroo when she's bored and wants him to stop talking but whenever he deepens it by sucking on her tongue or his fingers try to slip under her shirt, she immediately pushes him away. "fucking pervert," she snaps, going back to her book

reader's bugging kuroo another day—the usual poking fun at him for being a loser always talking about science and tripping over his own feet. "i bet you've never even had pussy. you a virgin or something?" you laugh at your own hypocrisy, keeping up the ruse

kuroo shrugs his shoulders, explaining that he had, in fact, slept with two people back in high school (his first girlfriend ever and a rebound after the two broke up)

reader's shocked that even someone as pitifully embarrassing as kuroo got some before her and irrationally pissed off at the thought of someone else touching kuroo like that

again, her behavior captures kuroo's attention, prompting him to ask if she's had sex before

"what the fuck are you on about? i'm not a fucking virgin!" you blurted out, immediately going on the defense. but kuroo can see how you're acting now and remembers all those times you got flustered but the tiniest bit of physical intimacy.

he stands up, using his height to back you into a corner of your small dorm room. just as he figured, your eyes grow wide and all the attitude you had moments before is nowhere to be seen.

"has nobody ever made you cum before, baby?" kuroo asks, leaning in for a deep kiss that you can't push your way out of this time. "is that why you're so upset? do you need me to help you cum?"

you've never seen kuroo act like this before—so secure and sure of himself. his finger reached out, slipping past your top to touch the soft skin and your body feels like it's buzzing.

he kisses you again, using his strength to keep you from pushing him away when his tongue enters your mouth. "te-tetsu," you whine, feeling embarrassed that he's having such an effect on you.

"tell me you want me to help," kuroo huffs between kisses. "i can't do it unless you tell me."

you'd literally rather die than admit how badly you want kuroo to do whatever he wants with you. but the words leave your lips anyway, full of desperation and shame. "tetsu, i wanna cum. please, please help me cum."

it's all kuroo needs to shove his hand down your shorts and push your panties to the side. you whine when his fingers plunge into your warm, wet heat. it's the first time anyone else has touched you down there and kuroo's fingers are thicker and rougher than yours.

his pace is slow but kuroo easily stretches you out, swallowing every cry of yours with another kiss. "this is all you needed huh, baby?"

it's all over when kuroo uses his thumb to circle your clit, leaving you more of an incoherent mess. it's never felt like this when it was just you. touching yourself will never be the same, it has to be kuroo doing it now. nobody else but him.

your body shudders, a sob leaving your lips as you finally come on kuroo's fingers, juices running down his hand. your cunt offers no resistance, fully accepting his digits fucking you through your orgasm.

the only thing keeping you upright is the fact that kuroo pinned you to the wall. you're feeling lightheaded—when did tears run down your face?—the squelching sound your pussy makes when kuroos pull his fingers out leave you mortified.

it's worse when he starts licking them, groaning over your essence.

kuroo helps you to your bed, laying you gently on the mattress and situates himself between your legs. "ready?"

"ready?" you repeated, unsure of what he meant. your cunt was still reeling from your last release, still feeling the ghost of kuroo's fingers sending you over the edge.

"oh, don't worry, baby. we're not having sex tonight, you're not ready yet." he coos, kissing your thigh. "but the thought of licking your sweet pussy right now makes me really hard and i just wanna be a little selfish."

this isn't the kuroo that cowers whenever you walk down the hall, afraid of becoming the target of your anger. this is much, much different that what you're used to.

"whatever makes you feel good, loser," you said, with no malice in your voice.

©sugawarassoulmate 2023 all rights reserved - please do not repost/translate my work on other platforms!

[anonymityisfunwriter]

CONGRATS ON THE MILESTONE!!!!!!!

i’m so happy you’ve captured the audience you deserve with all the stories you’ve shared with us

you never let me down with anything. now, i don’t typically read sam wilson romantic fics (i love him platonically), but your midnight rain fic truly had my heart in pieces, i adored the way you wrote everything and the flash backs that tied it all together. solid 5 stars from me <3

now, as for a possible request / idea, i’m obsessed with a classic “who did this to you?” / “who did this” protective fic with bucky - or anyone really. romantic or platonic, it’s a favourite of mine and i’m sure that i’d love any way you wrote it – if you chose to write that, no pressure at all i just love you

an: i would gladly write anything for you. ily, bestie, and thank you so, so much 🥹

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Anon's 1K Celebration | Bucky Barnes Masterlist

Who Did This To You?

this made me think of irrationally overprotective bucky barnes. the one who threatens men that stare at you a little too long. the one who wouldn't have a single qualm about killing someone for hurting you, even if you're perfectly capable of taking care of yourself.

you’re not together. it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks, you’re really not.

you’re just close. sometimes, a little too close.

but you're not together. no, you're definitely not together.

so after a long, exhausting, disaster of a mission, you're not thrilled to be sitting in the medbay with your team mates not so gently suggesting that you need to tell bucky.

"he's going to be pissed," sam warns.

"occupational hazard," you grunt, holding the ice pack to your throbbing temple. "he's just going to have to deal."

"so you don't deny that he's gonna be pissed?"

you roll your eyes, "no one likes when their friends get hurt."

sam shrugs, "friends, bed buddies, a couple, same shit, different font."

you groan at him, hissing as you accidentally put a little too much pressure on your temple, "don't you have to go annoy anyone else?"

sam looks down at his watch and hums, "not until 4."

there isn't a warning when bucky bursts through the door, rage rolling off of him in waves. his darkened eyes flash over to you.

"you know, on second thought, i did have that other thing to go do, so, uh, bye!"

bucky's chest heaves for a reason that has nothing to do him running down here. he stalks over to you, making no attempt to hide his eye raking over you head to toe.

"buck..." you sigh.

he stands before you, and without a word, he grips your chin, angling it to the side to see the full injury.

you suck in a sharp breath, you've never seen him this upset. his nostrils flare as he breaks his silence. "who did this to you?"

"bucky," you admonish. it wasn't even that bad. you took the butt of a rifle to the temple, leaving a nasty bruise and knocking you out momentarily. thankfully, sam was there to assist. it looked much worse than it felt.

he grips the back of your neck, his breath coming out in pants, "i want a name. now."

you rest your hand against his chest. you can feel his heart hammering against his ribcage, "it’s fine. mission’s over. it’s done."

"fuck no," bucky growls. "someone gave my girl -"

"your girl?" you rasp.

one hand still gripping the back of your neck, bucky's other vibranium hand comes to lift your chin to meet his gaze. your shiver has nother to do with the cool metal. bucky's breath skates across your gaped lips, "no one touches what’s mine."

AnonymityIsFun Masterlist Anon's 1K Celebration

As always, let me know what you think! Reblogs and comments are always appreciated! 💛

Taglist: @marianita195 @meli18gonzalez@ludicbouquetfromearth@matchat3a@famousbreadcherryblossomsstuff@valoraxx@blue786sworld@buckyandgeraltsupremacy@geminigengar@ansaturn@ecolle@lexhalstead3@ybflkmj@mediocre-daydreams@shanye1112@thegirlnextdoorssister@toomanyfanficsbruh@moonlightreader649@breathtaking-cynthia@mirikusashes@beans-and-toast@niyahcoca@katiechikin@elxvrr@antiheroxsblog@infamouslyclumsy@krissydclayton93@buckysbarne@deadheadwbedhead @qualitygiantshoepsychic@whitexwolfxx310 @getosprettyboy @buckybarnessimpp @withyoutilltheendoftheline

[starmocha]

You were being irrational. You knew you were being irrational. You didn’t care.

As you were stomping away in your heels, Sylus easily followed after you, his long legs kept the distance closed no matter how fast you struggled to walk away from him.

You heard him chuckling at you from behind. You huffed, annoyed and embarrassed, and walked faster. Sylus continued at his leisure pace, effortlessly keeping a close distance to you. You glowered some more when he started humming a carefree tune.

After a few more minutes of this futile and silly attempt to escape him, you eventually gave up and just stood in your spot, arms crossed, glaring at nothing in particular and pretending he was not behind you even though his imposing height and presence was nigh impossible to ignore.

“Sweetie, stop pouting,” Sylus said, walking around to face you. He leaned down to your height with a smile, amused that you still refused to look him in the eyes after his earlier casual confession when he yanked your second glass of wine away inside the banquet hall. His eyes drifted to the dark night sky above you, laughing softly, “There's literally a sky of shooting stars right now.”

“I can't believe you said you would feed me to Mephisto.”

“You were drunk.”

“How dare you.”

“You called me Mr. Big Ca-Cawk.”

“Sylus, look, there's a sky of shooting stars right now,” you said, feigning astonishment and looking away from him.

Sylus rubbed his forehead and muttered to himself, half-exasperated and half-amused, “This girl...”

“Aren't you going to make a wish?” You asked sweetly, hoping he would forget your earlier sour attitude. You batted your eyelashes prettily at him, giving him the sweetest smile you could muster to distract him from the fact that earlier you had allowed yourself to be irrationally upset by a hypothetical drunken question you quite frankly didn’t even remember asking.

He laughed low. He could see through your feeble charade clearly, but he humored you, giving you a devilish smirk. Sylus reached out to pull you by your waist, bringing you closer to him. His sudden action made your heart skipped a beat, and a startled gasp left your lips in spite of yourself. At this point, you couldn’t even remember why you allowed yourself to be annoyed by him, or perhaps, you were never actually angry at him. You were just embarrassed by your own previous drunken behavior. It was silly, you knew it, but you just couldn’t help yourself.

You truly felt childish, but Sylus didn’t seem to see it that way, or if he did, he didn’t care at all. His long finger glided down your pinked cheeks, reaching your chin and lightly tipping it up so you could meet his calm gaze.

The night air was cool, but it did nothing to alleviate the rising heat between the two of you. You were acutely aware of his body heat, feeling a warmth in your cheeks as well. You didn’t know if you were blushing because of your embarrassing attitude tonight, or just maybe, you believed, it was because of the man in front of you, looking at you with absolute adoration in his eyes, still able to find you endearing even when you behaved horribly.

The longer he gazed at you, the faster your heart beat.

He smirked. You lowered your sight.

Sylus leaned down, dropping a chaste kiss on your forehead and luring out your first smile of the night. His voice was soft, his words sincere: "Sweetheart, all of my wishes have already come true."

— even if the stars fall down, aka the follow-up to would you still love me if i was a worm? (and other thought-provoking questions) that no one asked for lmao but I am incapable of just having simple fun in Glint Photobooth. I need backstories.

[sturnsdoll]

Matt and Fwb!reader

at a party she decides to flirt with someone else, i mean she is still single after all

Matt doesn’t like that much

BELONG TO ME ੈ♡˳ - M.S

pairing: (fwb!) matt x reader

summary: when you catch your fuck buddy bestfriend flirting with another girl at a party, you decide you need to distract yourself with a different guy. matt doesn't like that at all. you belong to him.

warnings: jealousy/possesivness, fingering, thigh riding, p in v, hair pulling, LOTS of dirty talk.

"pink" - reader speaking "blue" - matt speaking

the walls in the house were vibrating with music. voices rose over one another. alcohol and perfume filled your nostrils and you were wandering around like a headless chicken to find your bestfriend matt, who had brought you here.

there was a good 10 minutes of being caught up in conversation, being pushed and shoved, as well as just pure confusion of the crowds of people that halted you from your search. but alas, through the crowd of people you recognize matt's black hoodie and grey tank. a smile returns to your face. you adjust your dress down from where it had risen as well as fix your hair a little. mouth open, you're about to call for your friend when you realize he wasn't just standing there conversating. there was a girl stood beside him. with the way his arm cradled her while she leaned on him there was practically no space between the two.

you wanted to keep walking up to him. wanted to not care. but something inside you physically ached at her being on the guy you were so close with. so intimate with. you had been so naked with. your bestfriend. without thinking you turned around, storming off in the other direction.

it took a few minutes, but not many for you to find a guy. handsome, but not matt really your type. it wasn't hard to convince him to come out to the backyard for a little space to have fun. once outside, the strangers hand grazed your thigh as the two of your lips mushed together. he tasted like beer and cigarettes. quite honestly? he kissed like a complete fucking idiot.. nothing like matt

but, he was decent looking. tall with a typically attractive (but douchey) face and damn well good enough to distract yourself from caring about someone else's endeavors. unbeknownst to you though, this would lead to just about anything but 'distracting yourself' from your bestfriend.

when you had seen matt with that girl, it was only as you were walking away that he saw you. matt had not as kindly as possible told the girl he had to go before chasing after you. he had been excited because he hadn't caught sight of you in about an hour or two- or at least he was excited till he watched you drag some random guy outside.

even though it was none of his buisiness, matt followed curiously until you, as well as the stranger, both exited the party. he stayed insde near the window to see what was happening. for two minutes he disgustedly obeserved a heated makeout that made his stomach turn. matt was finding it impossible to decide wether he had a right to go out there and stop it or not.

he wasn't your boyfriend after all. only the friend you fuck... right?

wrong. because the second that guy's hand brushed too close to the hem of your dress, matt was throwing open the back door. he came uncomfortably close to you and the stranger. you caught sight of his enraged features right away. you assumed something had happened and were immedietly concerned "matt hey what's wr-"

through gritted teeth, he interupted "we're leaving now. please." matt's tone was stern but he was trying not to upset you by being irrationally angry. you backed away from the stranger enough to take in matt's whole body language."what? why? the party isn't eve- matt!" matt had firmly but not too aggresively pulled you infront of him by your arm. away from the other guy. the other guy was completely dumbfounded and frozen, no clue what was happening. matt looked down at you with urgency "are you staying here with him.." he eyed the stranger with threat "or are you going with me to your house?" you could tell that whatever was wrong, he was angry enough that he was trying not to have some kind of outburst. although... you'd beg to differ that he already was.

you finally respond "you?" your tone was telling him 'obviously?'. before you can question him further, matt nods as he grabs your hand to drag you through the backgate. the whole way to the car you were asking matt why he was so eager to leave but it just fell on deaf ears.

the entire drive to your apartment his hand aggresively kneaded at your thigh so now you were assuming he left because he was horny. he made it clear that he'd tell you what was happening when you'd get home.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

the second the two of you entered your home you started asking questions while he slid his sweater and shoes off. "if you were horny we could've found a room there matt?" you said, still confused. he didn't respond to you as he undid his shoe laces. now you were concerned. "matt? say something c'mon"

once his shoes were off he stood to face you. he didn't wanna be toxic by yelling at or harassing you about some guy. but he couldn't just let it go either.

"who was that guy?" his voice comes out colder than he means it to. you shrug mindlessly "just some guy" you respond. before he can ask anything else you mutter "not that it's your buisiness". he looks down at you with a million emotions coursing through him, jealousy overcoming most of the others. "excuse me?" he seemed offended and it pissed you off since he started all this. "well since you were busy with some girl i figured i'd keep myself busy too." you stated.

he laughs sarcastically "i had an arm around her because she was drunk and i was physically pointing her in the right direction of where she was going. and yeah, i may have flirted a little" he steps closer to the point where you can feel his breath fan your face "you however- had that guys hand halfway up your fucking dress." even matt's surprised at his own tone. but you both know he'd never intentionally upset or hurt you though. "i was stupid for being jealous but at least i didn't drag you outta there. it's not like i'm your girlfriend matt. i'm not yours" you even hurt yourself with your last few choice of words.

"were you gonna let him touch you?" matt's voice shows that he's desperate for an answer. you roll your eyes. "not your buisiness." the second the words leave your lips he steps forward again, making you back up. he grabs your arm to keep you in place so now your noses brush and lips ghost one anothers. "were you?" he repeats. you can't believe how jealous he seems but something about it makes your thighs clench. "okay, jesus matt, yes. i was." you reply quickly. there's a moment where you can see his mind pool with thoughts. but before any of them come out, his lips smash onto yours. his hand going to the back of your head, in your hair. your lips meld into one anothers, but there's nothing gentle about it. his grip on your hair tightens as he backs you into a nearby dresser.

once he's done with kissing your lips practically raw, he begins to leave marks down your neck. "i don't care if i'm your friend-" he stops to suck at your neck "your bestfriend.." another harsh suck to your collarbone "your fuck buddy.." his free hand pulls your dress up a little "or the biggest pain in your ass ever." he cups your pussy through your underwear as he pulls your head back by your hair, elicting a whine from your throat "you're mine" his hand slithers into your panties and two fingers enter you as he seethes out "you belong to me." into your ear

"matt!" you cry out. he gives you no time to prepare before his long fingers are fucking you faster than you can even think. once he's studied your face and confirmed to himself that you're enjoying this side of him, he uses the leverage of his grip in your hair to pull your face to his, sloppily making out as his fingers abuse your cunt.

a moment later he pulls back again "think he would've known how you like to be touched?" matt questions as he thumb presses down on your clit just the way you like. shaking your head no, you grip his shoulders for support. he answers his own question "no. but i do. so are you his?" his question makes you clench around his fingers because you know where this is going. "n- ngh- no." "well than?"

"liste- uhh mm- i'm sorry i-" he cuts you off "no. i don't care. jus wanna know who you belong to" his thumb circles faster on your clit now, adding more pressure as well. "yo- mm!" he purposefully ruined your chance at speaking by curling his fingers into that one spot. the spongey spot inside you that makes your head spin and stomach turn.

his gives a look of faux sympathy "sorry sweetheart i didn't get that" his tone is convincingly sweet but you know better. giving him a glare, you repeat yourself "you, you asshole". a grin plasters on his face at the satisfaction. you said you belong to him. he also loved the way you mouthed off to him even if he wouldn't admit it "that's how you're gonna talk to me when im knuckles deep in you?" proving his point, he manages to push his fingers just a little deeper. this time when they curl you gasp and moan, gripping his shoulders. you lay your forehead on his chest, embarassed by how your cunt squeezes his fingers at every dirty word and little touch from him. he knows what he's doing. "matt c'mon" you beg.. even though you don't really want him to stop.

"what? you were shamelessly gonna let a stranger finger fuck you but now you're all shy, hm?" he releases your hair so he can pull the top of your dress down, exposing your tits. you only respond to him with a whine as his lips attach to your left nipple. you start to feel the knot in your stomach forming.

his teeth nip and suck making you arch your back, your chest pressing further toward him. your mouth opens, head tilted back. you're getting right to the edge. you're about to tell your bestfriend you need to cum when he slowly pulls his fingers out, hand emerging from under your dress.

you sigh and eye him annoyidly "matt." you complain, clenching around nothing. he releases your tit with a pop. "considering you were gonna let someone else touch you, you clearly don't appreciate how good i am at making you finish" as he talks he's guiding you over to your couch "so i think you should do it yourself so you can learn to appreciate how good i am to you" there's a cocky little smile on his face that he's trying to supress. before you get a chance to respond to him, he sits down and pulls you gently onto his thigh.

your dress bunches around the very tops of your thighs now, underwear still on you, completely drenched from him fingering you. staring at him, you don't process what he's telling you to do until his long fingers come up to grab your jaw, gently forcing eyecontact "ride my thigh." he instructs right before pushing his leg up, the light friction is just enough to effect you.

with how sensitive you already were, the lightest touches have you gone. your hips instinctively began rocking over the rough material of his jeans. your hands find his shoulders to steady yourself once again. his eyes are glued to your frustratedely needy expression. the way your lips part and your lashes flutter as you close your eyes makes his dick throb to be inside you.

although your clits getting some friction, the lack of having his fingers or more disirably his dick inside you is driving you insane. there's already a wet patch on his jeans from you. not surprising considering he has you completely soaked. your hips are already beginning to slow, finding it impossible to chase your orgasm just by fucking yourself on his thigh.

matt notices this. "tired, baby? you need help?" he teases. to add to it his thigh flexes again making you whine his name. it feels good but you need more. "fuck matt, please" you sigh out desperately. his long fingers take hold of your hips and begin rocking you at a steady pace, pushing you down onto his thigh. "this feel better?" he asks. you nod. there's a cockiness to his voice that makes you close your thighs tightly around his.

he looks down to see where you've already soaked his jeans as well as to see how your pussy's desperately grinding on him for whatever pleasure you can get. he looks back up now to see how your eyes are closed, focus in your features. pretty whines and moans spill one after the other. the more needy you get, the higher in pitch your needy little noises get. matt loves when he gets you like this. nothing in your head besides hoping he'll let you cum.

he himself is beginning to find it impossible to ignore the buldge that's straining the fabric of his jeans. for the second time tonight you start to feel your stomach twisting with the familiar ache of an upcoming orgasm. your thighs squeeze around his thigh even harder now.

"can i?" you whine. matt already knows what you want so his grip on your hips tightens bruisingly, forcing you to a sudden stop. your eyes open wide and you stare at him pleadingly, so worked up and out of breath that you can't bring yourself to protest or complain when he lifts you off him and sets you on the couch so that you're on your knee's, hands on the arm rest. he's standing now, removing his clothes. once he's finished, he gets comfortable behind you good thing you have a wide enough couch for the both of you and helps you with getting your panties off. he lines himself up, his tip teasing your hole.

your hips push back toward him needily but he grips them again to force them back into place. there's a long moment of nothing. you open your mouth to ask him what the hell's taking so long but it's replaced by a nearly pornographic noise at the feeling of his length filling you completely with 0 warning.

he pulls out with only the tip in before filling you completely again. "matt!" you cry out in pleasure (and a little pain from the stretch.) loving the way his name sounds from you, he wants to hear it again. he pulls out then fucks back into you. just like he wanted, his name falls from your lips.

his pace is on the slower side but every thrust is deep, hitting all the right spots. your nails are threatning to pierce the fabric of your couch. his name mixed with moans of pleasure come over and over again. matt's not a huge egotistical asshole or anything but he'd be lying if he didn't say that the control he has over you right now wasn't getting him off. he loves that you only become such a mess for him.

he loves that you belong to him

his hips are twitching and his thrusts are faster, needier. his hand finds your hair and he pulls you up so your back is against his chest. he knows he's close but he needs to make sure his girl his bestfriend comes first, so his other hand leaves your hip to come to your clit, rubbing fast circles that make you see stars.

he feels you clenching, hears your choked moans but decides to ask anyway. he wants to hear you say it. "you wanna cum for me baby?" he asks right in your ear, his voice goes straight to your cunt making you impossibly more turned on. you nod your head but that's not enough for him.

"use your words" "n-need to cum f- mph fuck!- for you" at the sound of your begging he nearly finishes but there's one more thing he needs to hear before he's done with you. "i'll let you cum if you- mmph- tell me who you belong to, y-yeah?" you can hear it in his voice, he's desperate too. but he wants needs the satisfaction of hearing that you're his. you groan with frustration "you, matt." your spit out at him. you don't care for his antics right now, just wanting to cum.

he uses his grip on your hair to tug your head to the side so he can make eyecontact with you. he can hear the ingenuity in your voice and he needs you to say it like you mean it. "say it again sweetheart." he demands, landing a light slap to your clit that elicts a whine from you. you can't take much more of this. "matt i need to cum pl-" "say. it. again." between each word he slams inside of you. you feel your legs begin to shake and mind going fuzzy.

"i'm yours, m-matt. i'm all yours"

"good girl. now go ahead and cum for me"

the words aren't even fully out of his lips when you coat his dick with your cum. your legs shake, mind a complete haze as he's fucking you through it. it doesn't take long before your body is basically limp. his grip on your hair and arm around you keeping you up.

he thrusts into you harshly just one more time before stilling, then you feel his seed fill and spill out of you. he stays there for a few seconds before pulling out, releasing his hold on you and gently guiding you to lay on the couch. he drops down behind you to hold you close, pulling a blanket from the top of the couch over the two of you.

for the next ten minutes your "bestfriend" lays behind you, his mouth peppering kisses along your shoulder silently, soothingly. you're the first to speak. "matt?" your voice comes quiet. "mhm?". "i'm assuming that meant you don't want me seeing other people?"

he pulls you closer against him "yea- well.. not unless you want us to be seeing other people??" there's a hint of concern in his voice. "absaloutely not." you say with no hesitation. you hear him let out a sigh of relief. there's a pause before you speak again "and matt?"

no response. "matt??" nothing.

you turn your head to see him fast asleep like a little baby.

idiot.

tags: @mattsrod @sturncakez

[longing-for-rain]

what exactly is Aang's toxic masculinity that you're talking about? there are no examples of such behavior on his part in the show. he is not an ideal person, he is a child who sometimes behaved incorrectly, just like all the other children in the show (Katara, Toph, Sokka), and this is normal.

in addition, we see how he regrets some of his wrong actions and gets better, while Zuko does not regret his toxic behavior, doesn't apologize and doesn't face the consequences of his behavior (racist jokes about Aang, demands that Katara forgive him as if he has the right to her forgiveness, an attack on Aang to "teach him a lesson" and many other things).

Hi anon, thanks for the ask! This is a very good illustration of what I was talking about in this post when I mentioned that I feel toxic men are overlooked more often for appearing “nice” than they are for being conventionally attractive.

No examples of toxic behavior in the show? What do you call this then?

I know what I (and the law) call it:

But you see, he’s “nice” right? This is just a misbehaved child, as you put it? Yah, no. He knew better and still did it because he was possessive; this whole interaction started because he was jealous that an actress playing Katara was interested in men other than him. And the show proceeded to frame the situation in a way that made Aang sympathetic, despite being the aggressor and the one behaving irrationally. How much more “toxically masculine” can you get than that? But he put on a flower crown once so we’re supposed to think he’s a soft uwu feminine boi (even though he was absolutely enraged that a female actress played him).

I also find it very interesting that you describe Katara and Sokka as “children” while Zuko is omitted from that list despite being the same age. Are you admitting you agree he’s more mature, or are you admitting that you hold him to different standards?

But, anyways. You asked about toxic behavior on Aang’s part, which I’ll get further into now that the most egregious example is out of the way.

Let’s break down what you consider unforgivably toxic behavior on Zuko’s part and compare it to Aang’s behavior in similar situations.

1. “Racist” jokes

I’m guessing this is made with reference to the “Air Temple preschool” comment. How exactly is this racist? In context, Aang is the one trying to force his beliefs on others, and Zuko makes this comment to a) tell him to back off and b) point out that Aang is, in fact, a child who doesn’t have any business telling Katara how to feel.

This point is particularly interesting to me, because it implies that the simple fact that Zuko doesn’t agree with the philosophy of Aang’s culture makes him racist. By this logic, Aang is also racist against Katara’s culture, because he clearly disagrees with her philosophy and is openly telling her that his culture is morally virtuous over hers. And well. That’s even more believable considering Aang’s previous reactions to Water Tribe culture.

Ah, yes. Playing with a cultural artifact like it’s a toy because you were upset about not being the center of attention for once, and telling everyone how disgusting you think cultural food is, what great ways to show the supposed love of your life how much you respect her culture!

I know your response to this point would be something like “uwu but he’s a kid he didn’t knowww” ok well. The same logic can be applied to any alleged “racism” on Zuko’s part.

2. “Demanding” forgiveness

Zuko: What can I do to make it up to you?

Ah, yes. How demanding of him. He’s clearly so self-centered and only thinking about his own values and agenda here.

It’s not like he…

…told his friend how she’s allowed to process her grief and try to impose his own morals…

…or demanded to know if his crush liked him back, wouldn’t accept “no” as an answer, and forced a kiss on her…

…or told an abuse victim he was wrong to want to kill his abusive father for trying to commit a genocide…

…oh, um. Yeah. Sorry, but after actually watching the show it’s very clear to me which character doesn’t seem to regret or see the flaws in any of his actions at the end of the show, which is when all of these examples took place.

3. Training in the finale

“Attacking Aang to teach him a lesson” … wow, that’s a very dishonest way of phrasing that situation. I’m impressed, I have to say. I’ve seen lots of dumb takes from Aang stans over the years but this is a new one.

Well, luckily I actually watched the scene in context, so my reaction was the same as all the other characters’ reactions in canon when they learned the context behind this “attack”:

They agree with him. Yeah. Obviously, when nobody is taking training seriously when the world is about to literally go up in flames, you might need to do something to get their attention.

“But it was dangerous!” you might argue. Well… yeah. When magic and bending is in the equation, training in the Avatar universe has been shown to be somewhat dangerous at times. As an example, from this very same episode, Toph very nearly smashed Sokka with a giant flaming rock. That was way closer to hurting someone than Zuko was in this incident. If you’re going to fault characters for making their training exercises too dangerous, I guess Toph is mega cancelled.

Now back to Aang. What was his reaction in this situation? How did he react to the end of the world being days away? He ran away with absolutely no plan. Just like he did at the very beginning of the show.

I mean, think about it. This is a critical flaw (and toxic trait) in Aang that is literally never addressed, because he starts and ends the show the exact same way: he’s faced with a problem, he runs away from it, then he’s saved by an in-universe equivalent of an Act of God. Wowie, such great character development. Not fixing your core flaw and having a mythical plot device materialize into existence to solve your problems for you. Aang’s whole arc is a big blah, because the writing fails to address any of his flaws or have him meaningfully question any of his values.

Meanwhile, Zuko has consistently been a fan favorite because he’s the opposite. His flaws are meaningfully addressed, he does admit he’s wrong and fix his flaws, and his character shows a critically acclaimed change throughout the show. His arc is written so well that despite being a cartoon character, Zuko is widely considered the poster child for a good redemption arc across all forms of media.

So anyways, miss me with the double standards… there is a reason why Zuko is the fan favorite, and it’s not just his abs 🔥

[alchemistc]

@a-mel0n's tags on the Helena gifset I reblogged made me take a step back and think for a bit.

I have a metric fuckton of my own issues that play into the way Helena Diaz makes me feel, but trying to look at it as unbiased as I can:

There's a large contingent of people who have IMMENSE derision for a Helicopter Mom, and the way they interpret her actions is just baked in misogyny on top of it. I'm a little scared to look at the tags on that post beyond the ones in my own notifications but I am assuming there's a lot of things in there that would make me go 'yeah but...she's not wrong'.

(If she were my mother we would fight to the death five times a week or I would have ghosted her years ago, but that's a me issue.)

A lot of the dogpiling seems to come from the fact that she's simultaneously dismissive of Eddie and holier-than-thou about the way Eddie parents. And I don't necessarily disagree with those points - there's a very specific reason her tone sticks in my craw and makes me irrationally upset, because it's a very specific behavior that when looked at in pattern is incredibly noticeable and incredibly demeaning.

The scene that tipped me over the edge on Helena isn't even in that gifset - it was when she couldn't be bothered to carry the fucking laptop over to where Chris's friends were singing him HBD, because that tipped the line from "I've been half-raising this child in your absence, this is a pattern of behavior on your part and I'm just trying to keep your son on even ground." to "I do not care about the relationship you have with my your son or the fact that you must be missing him."

In the end, Chris is the one who made the decision to leave, to go live with his grandparents, and they obliged because they love him. Eddie can't and shouldn't fault them for that.

And let's be real. Eddie's a fucking mess. Eddie has BEEN a fucking mess since he knocked up his girlfriend as a teenager and he's never fully recovered from that. He was already expected to be the man of his house BEFORE that, too. He's taken hit after hit after hit but I'm not sure what he's learned from it? That could be a narrative issue but he tends to go with the flow until he can't anymore and then throw live grenades at the issue.

Where I take issue with Helena is the way she just treats Eddie like he should Do Better without actually ever sitting down and having a serious conversation with him. She lectures, she hovers, she makes snide comments, and most of the time she's RIGHT but she doesn't get through to Eddie because her approach is ... atrocious. And she knows it, but she never fucking tries a different way.

And it stinks of Chris being her do-over kid. (Son, specifically, since we don't know anything about her daughters.) She could never bridge the gap and she's disappointed with the way Eddie's life has panned out but this time, this time the kid she's raising appreciates her, listens to her, wants her around, so she keeps holding on to that.

She's not evil, and she's nowhere close to being the worst parent among the 118 mains, but she's a perfect portrayal of the kind of parent who gets away with being cruel because she's just so focused on making sure her grandson's needs are met. She's the kind of parent who will turn a conversation on its head because she feels like she's being unfairly attacked when the conversation wasn't even about her.

I have sympathy for her: her son, the boy who had to be responsible for too much, too early, left her with a new daughter-in-law and a new baby while he fucked off to do what he thought was the right and correct thing to take care of his family. She lived that with her own husband, so I'm sure her priority has been Chris for a LONG time. But just like Eddie (like mother like son) she's done zero learning or growing from the time Eddie's been taking care of Chris on his own.

I think she's fascinating. I want to shake her by the shoulders until she's mildly concussed. I want her to consider that maybe they ALL need fucking therapy. I want her to look at her son and see an adult who is struggling and could use her support and guidance instead of her couched disapproval of anything he does. I would love for her to make a tenth of the effort with Eddie that she does with Chris.

She makes me so mad I wanna scream, but I think the thing that annoys me most is how the show treats her like an obstacle for Eddie to be able to raise his son, when they COULD be trying to figure out how to make it work together.

[amica-aenigmata-naboo]

Hurt

Astarion x Y/N - drabble - 1.1K WC

Masterlist

Warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, being mean to each other, fighting, fluff ending

------------------------

You normally didn’t mind, you really didn’t. His little quips and remarks usually made you laugh. But as of late they were making you uncomfortable, beyond that they were making you sad. You were sure he meant no harm but nevertheless harm was caused. Like little paper cuts on your heart. Today had hurt especially. He dodged your morning kiss, making a face that you could only describe as disgust. He made you the butt of most jokes. You didn’t even stay in his tent at night anymore because he never came to you, staying out all night doing gods know what or sleeping away from you. 

“You have a type don’t you? Elven prostitutes… honestly darling it’s pathetic.” Astarion said as you finished speaking with the drow twins. His voice was unimpressed and dismissive of you. 

Your face fell and you felt your eyes grow wet. You handed Karlach the crude map the drows gave you, leading to the wine festival you were to attend in order to stop a series of murders. “Were done for the day.” you said stoically, leaving Sharess’ Caress. The sun was just beginning to dip down behind the mountains. You waved your hand, golden flakes enveloping you. Your armor was gone and you were left in simple clothes. A hand clasped your shoulder, stopping you from walking.

“Love…” Astarion started.

You cut him off, “Leave me alone.” you said, harshly shrugging his hand off your shoulder and shoving him away. You turned and started to walk off again. Ever persistent, he followed you. He grabbed your wrist with a much softer grasp but you were having none of it. Gold flowed from your hand, forming a small dagger. You yanked your hand away before pointing the knife at his throat, “I won’t ask again.” you spat at him. His face contorted. He looked hurt, wounded by your words and actions. And honestly, you felt good. He was finally feeling what had been building up in you for weeks. 

He watched you disappear in the crowds of Baldur’s Gate. What had he done? He knew exactly what. He was not kind to you as of late. This bitter pit inside of him had him acting irrationally. He knew exactly what it was. He loved you so he was trying to push you away. And by the looks of it, he was succeeding. He sighed, dropping his head. You needed space, so he would give it to you. He returned to camp with the others. He anxiously awaited your return, trying to come up with what he would say to you. 

-----------------------------

You wandered the city, not sure where you were trying to end up. You just wanted to be away. Eventually you made it out of the city and into the wilderness. You sat on the edge of a cliff. You watched the ocean below crash against the rock over and over again. You finally shed your tears. You tried not to blame yourself but you had no idea what had changed in him. You knew what you had to do, now you just needed to gather the courage to do it. You were the leader, you had to be strong. 

Deep into the night you returned to camp. Astarion watched you walk to your tent. You lit a few candles, your tent illuminating him as he edged closer. You were taking your trousers off when he walked in. You pulled them back up with a huff and pulled your large shirt down to cover you.

“Hardly the first time I’ve seen you without clothes…” said Astarion, trying to lighten the mood.

“That was the past.” you said in a flat voice before you pushed past him to grab your brush. You brushed your hair in the mirror, acting as if he was invisible.

Astarion’s undead heart felt like it was trembling. You weren’t upset, you were angry. He had never seen you angry and he had a feeling he was about to experience a side of you he was unprepared to meet. 

“Darling…” he started, reaching towards you.

You turned around, dodging his hand. “No. You don’t get to call me that anymore.” you said confidently, yet inside your heart was breaking.

Astarions face turned soft, scared. “What should I call you then?”

“Y/N. I am nothing to you beyond a traveling companion, so treat me as such.” your face was cold, your eyes were sharp.

“My sweet, please…” he said. You shot him a glare for the pet name but he persisted. “Y/N…” 

“Do you have anything of value to say? If not, I need rest.” you sauntered over to your bedroll, half expecting him to leave. With the way he was treating you, he should be jumping at the chance to leave. 

“I’m sorry.” he said in a small voice. 

You had never heard him like that, even in his softer moments. You forced your eyes to meet his and noticed the lone tear falling down his cheek. “Were nothing to each other Astarion, you hardly have anything to be sorry for. You should go.” you said, doing your best to keep up the facade. 

“No!..” he blurted. You quirked an eyebrow at him. “... please just let me say my piece… If you still want me to go afterwards, I will without fuss.” 

You sighed before nodding at him.

“I’m sorry… for everything. I’ve acted monstrously towards you as of late. I… I love you… and I’m so scared I didn’t know what to do… I tried to push you away. But once you were gone… everything felt worse. I don’t know what to do… but I do know I’m sorry for hurting you.” he said in a calm tone but you could hear the slight panic. 

“You love me?” you asked him, unsure if you heard him right. 

“More than you can imagine.” he said with the smallest smile.

“You fucking idiot...” you mumbled. 

His smile completely dropped off, he nodded curtly as he turned to walk out. You grabbed his wrist, turning him towards you before you crashed your lips to his. He let out a sigh of relief he didn’t know he was holding. He squeezed you close to him, holding your face in his hands, scared you would disappear if he didn’t. 

“You’re a fucking moron… but you’re my fucking moron.” you kissed him again. You wiped a tear from his face, he nuzzled his head into your hand. 

“I’m so sorry…” he whispered. 

You shushed him, “We were both rash, we both made judgment errors. I’m sorry too.” you kissed his cheeks. “Let's go to bed?”

“My sweet, I’d like nothing more.” he smiled at you, hugging you close before descending to the bedroll with you. “And if I’m honest, you holding a knife to my throat was rather… erotic.” He said with lust in his voice and a wink of his eye.

--------------------------

Naboo's Note:

Hello! I love a little angst so here we go! Hope you all enjoy, love you all so much! XOXOXOXOXO!!!

[btsficsandsuch]

Please Don’t Forget About Me

Your husband Jungkook has to leave for tour. Normally it’s not a big deal, but having to leave your newborn daughter is something he’s never had to deal with before.

———————-———————————————————

“She’s the cutest baby ever.”, you said looking over at your husband Jungkook. He nodded not taking his eyes off of off the newborn peacefully sleeping in her bassinet, “She really is Y/N. We did a good job.” You began to walk out of the room, but then you noticed that Jungkook wasn’t following behind you. You waited a few more second before speaking, “Kookie are you coming? She’s not going anywhere I promise.” He chuckled, “I know I just don’t want I miss any time with her.” You gave him a knowing smile and made your way out of the door.

You were able to get some chores done around the house and now you were just sitting on the couch when Jungkook came walking out of the nursery. He dropped another bag over by the front door. You looked over and saw the pile that was starting to grow. Tomorrow he was leaving for a world tour that would take him away from you guys for the next two months. You knew it was hard on him to leave when it was just you and now that your daughter was there you knew it was going to be almost impossible for him to go.

Jungkook walked over to you and laid on the couch so that his head was in your lap. He let out a long sigh. You already knew what was wrong but you thought that if you asked him maybe he’d start to talk about it instead of bottling it up. “Kook what’s wrong? You used to get so excited to go on tour. You get to travel the world and see your fans and do what you love.,” you spoke while slowly running your fingers through his hair. He thought for a moment before responding, “Y/N I do love all of that. I always will. But I love you and I love Y/D/N more than anything. Y/D/N is not even a month old and I already have to leave her.” He was quiet for a couple minutes before continuing, “I’m going to tell them I can’t go on this tour. I have to back out.”

You could tell that he was getting more upset by the minute and was starting to think irrationally. You slowly started to rub his chest trying to remind him to breathe and calm down. “You can’t do that Kookie. Remember what we said when we decided to start a family? We said that this wouldn’t stop you from performing or doing what you love. You don’t want to let down the members or the fans. They need you just as much as we do, sometimes even more. I will send you lots of photos and videos and we can video chat every day.” He nodded in agreement but you could tell that deep down he was still upset. The two of you made your way to the bedroom to get ready to sleep. Jungkook wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close in the bed, “Y/N thank you for being there for me. I love you.” You nestled into his chest, “I love you too.” The two of you drifted off to sleep in each others arms just like that.

You woke up in the early hours of the morning. Looking over at your phone you saw the time said it was 3am. You figured since you were awake you better go feed your daughter as she’ll be waking up any minute anyways. You made your way out of bed not even noticing that Jungkook was no longer wrapped in the beds warmth. You stood in front of the nursery ready to enter when you heard someone talking on the other side of the door. You slowly cracked it open to hear what was being said when you heard Jungkook’s voice, “and that’s how mommy and daddy met and fell in love” you heard him say. Your daughter must’ve woken up and he was telling her a story to get her to go back to sleep. You were about to let yourself in when he continued, “I know you don’t understand what I’m saying to you right not but I really wish you did. It would make this so much easier for me. I love you more than I ever thought possible. I really don’t want to leave you and for two whole months. I’m going to miss so much. But I’m going to think of you every minute of every day. And when I come back I’m not letting you out of my sight. You’re the best thing to ever happen to me. So please don’t forget me Y/D/N.” When you heard his sniffles you could feel your heart shattering into a million pieces. You didn’t know if you wanted to run in there and give him the biggest hug, or pack your bags and follow him all over the world with a newborn, or simply just sit there and cry with him. You decided he had everything under control and you didn’t want to interrupt his time with his daughter so you made your way back to bed falling asleep fairly quickly.

You woke up a few hours later to your phone buzzing nonstop. 18 missed calls. Text message after text message,

Joonie: Y/N I’m sure you’ve got a lot going on, but please call me when you get the chance.

Yoongles: Y/N you really need to contact one of us back. It’s urgent.

Tae: You need to speak with him. Management said if he goes through with his then he’s out of the group.

JinJin: Please call one of us or management back. We know this is a difficult time but Jungkook is making a huge mistake.

It went on and on. Your mind was racing with so many thoughts. What did he do? What’s a huge mistake? You jumped out of bed and through on some clothes. You were going to get your daughter fed and changed and then you’d give them a call back. You walked into the nursery and noticed your daughter was nowhere to be found. Your heart started beating a million beats a minute. You felt like you were going to be sick. You started walking, almost running, to the living room to grab your car keys. With shaking hands you were about to call Jungkook when you stopped dead in your tracks.

Sitting on the couch in the living room clutching your newborn daughter to his chest was Jungkook. You felt a huge rush of relief seeing both of them there and safe, but you were also extremely angry at him. You were about to shout when you heard him sniffling and wiping at the tears under his eyes. You pushed your anger aside and made your way over to him. You rested your hand on his thigh, “Kookie what did you do? The boys are blowing up my phone. Jin said you’re making a huge mistake.”

He looked up at you. His eyes watery and red. He’d clearly been crying for a while. “I told the company that I was refusing to go on this tour. I can’t do it Y/N. I can’t leave her. Not now. She doesn’t understand why I’m leaving. What if she thinks I’m never coming back?” The sadness in his voice broke you, “Kookie we talked about this. You can’t give up everything that you’ve worked so hard for. I know it’s difficult and scary right now but it’ll get easier. You can call and talk to her any time so she can hear your voice and I’ll lay her down next to one of your shirts so she’ll be able to smell you. She would never forget her dad. I promise. You have so many people depending on you right now but no matter what Y/D/N and I will always be here waiting. No matter how long.”

He was starting to calm down with your words. It was at this time you felt your phone buzzing in your back pocket. You had completely forgot about everyone trying to contact both of you. You answered not even looking at the ID. It was Namjoon. The two do you spoke for a few minutes. You let him know that Jungkook was at home and safe and that you were trying to fix the situation. He let you know that the boys were already at the airport and that a car was waiting for Jungkook outside. The two of you went back and forth for a little bit. You asked him for ten more minutes to try and convince him to join the tour. Namjoon agreed to stall as long as he could.

You looked over at Jungkook. He was still clutching your daughter, slowly rocking back and forth. “There’s a car waiting for you outside and the boys are already at the airport.”, you said sitting back down next to the two of them. You continued, “Look Kookie I know it’s easy for me to say all this because I’m not the one that has to leave her but the hardest part is going to be walking out that door. Once you get with your members and you start performing and seeing the fans I think it’ll get easier on you. You don’t want to regret this later on and you don’t want our daughter to feel like it was her fault.” He slowly nodded, “I know Y/N. I just didn’t think it would be so hard to leave. I don’t want to let anyone down though. Especially you and Y/D/N.”

He held onto your daughter for a few more minutes before giving her a big kiss on the forehead and placing her down in the bassinet in the corner of the room, “I love you Y/D/N. Be good for your mom. Remember what I said last night.” He walked over to you wiping away the tears that were still falling on his cheeks. The two of you made your way over to the front door where he turned to look at you, “Promise me you’ll send lots of pictures and videos. And promise me you’ll answer when I call. And promise me you’ll keep telling her how amazing and talented and handsome her dad is.” The last line making you chuckle. He leaned in and gave you a kiss, “I love you Y/N. Thank you for supporting me.” You cupped his cheeks and gave him another kiss, “Of course. I love you. I mean you’re just so amazing and talented and handsome so how could I not.”

He gave one last look back at your daughter while he grabbed the last of his bags and made his way out the door. You watched him greet the driver and slowly get in the car. Once the car was out of sight you went back in the house and picked up your daughter who was starting to stir. Sitting on the couch you began to rock her all while telling her everything you had planned for the next couple months, “And then next month we’re going to go visit daddy and spend the last month of the tour with him. Uncle Namjoon just let me know that he is working with management so that the two of us can safely travel to see him. But when daddy calls us we can’t say anything to him. It’s going to be a surprise.”