#it feels so nice and cozy to me
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I would consider my gender to be "cis with benefits"
#cuz like#I'm afab#but I would identify as a demigirl#it feels so nice and cozy to me#but like#I don't think it would be fair to call myself trans#I kinda#just slid to the left#like ''good job guys!! you were so close!“
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the fish that keeps appearing all over my recommended only that he's out of jail and happy
#✁ | freshly decorated | ✃#roblox#sebastian pressure#sebastian solace#roblox pressure#pressure#pressure sebastian#the way I just copy and pasted these tags because I really don't know what tags he would use#he makes me so mad I literally downloaded roblox because I was curious of him#AND I GOT THE WOMP WOMP LINE?????? I WAS SO LIKE. never speak to me again#also I've been only drawing him for a week it's driving me insane get him OUT#it's so bad getting muses because then suddenly you can ONLY draw the muse I hate this stupid fish#(loving)#also random but#I like to think that if he did manage to escape the blacksite#the idea where like#he can only live in like more rural areas (probably living with someone to help him um#get food#domestic life kinda thing#but like I just think like being cozy. drinking something hot. being next to the fireplace to be warm#warmth being something that he lost a long time ago and it feeling so nice that he can feel it with someone he loves#or cares idk#i need to shut up I WILL LITERALLY JUST SUDDENLY WRITE A FANFIC IN THE TAGS IF I CONTINUE ANY LONGER T_T
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i baked a mini loaf of banana bread and it turned out soo good… have been sooo into making myself little treats at home lately☺️☺️☺️
#partly because it feels so nice to be cozy at home and bake and make my place smell amazing#& partly because going to uni everyday and getting a little treat there every day would lead me to being broke so fast so im alternating#between buying/cooking or baking at home!!#++ when i make things at home i can always bring some to share with my friends!!!! <33333
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"what's your role in the fandom" i am a clown who writes the most terrible posts only liked by two of my mutuals out of pity
#just shut up about the role in the fandom#can we just enjoy the music?#i have no talents i'm just here am i allowed to be here?#this shit is the reason i deleted instagram#it's not a fucking competition for fuck's sake#also stop fighting for celebrities' attention it's kinda pathetic#“the leader of the fandom” there's no such thing everyone is equally important#can we maybe stop worshipping people just because they got a like or a follow from their fave?#EVERYONE IS FUCKING EQUAL#like yes it's nice being noticed but it doesn't mean you are better than everyone else#what the fuck is wrong with people#honestly i'm forever thankful for being a tumblr girlie#instagram is a mess#i mostly joined it because of lmm fandom cause everyone was active there and we had almost no people here#just a bunch of haters#i'm telling you guys this shit destroyed my mental health#and tumblr clique made me feel alive again#it's so cozy here and clikkies are so cool#honestly the best decision ever if you ask me#i say whatever and whatever that i want*
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#i'm pretty sleepy + slightly sunburned after my nature walk today ~ it feels so nice to relax a bit <3#i still need to do some laundry at some point but for now you couldn't get me to move if you were trying to make me lol#i obviously love this shirt since i wear it like three times a week or sumn lmaojhfshkgs thank u washing machine#myself#mine#my post#my photo#self#cozy#cozycore#cozy aesthetic#comfy#comfycore#comfy aesthetic#crop top#midriff#stomach#tummy#belly button ring#body piercing#girls with piercings#pierced#soft#soft aesthetic#soft grunge#soft grunge aesthetic#alternative#alt girl#alt aesthetic#alt
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MOE. SUMMER ALT‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
BIGGEST thing about Moe history is that for Literally Actual Years. I have been trying SO hard to get a beach outfit for it Right. I always had some aspects of it in mind (the white cover-up -- initially sheer, but I like the idea that it's a light shawl kinda like Lyon's, here). But a lot of my designs felt too feminine. Moe is about Balance. Moe is about Mishmash. Moe is about The Silly Factor. It's also unexpectedly practical and loves questionable fashion choices.
All this in mind! I think its Look really came together when I decided to give it some sporty touches. I esp love the wet shoes... and the visor works so well on it?? The little fish skeleton is a handmade accessory (not actual bones.), like its "tail" in its everyday outfit. I imagine it's jointed/maybe chain linked, so it has some movement to it! The skeleton adds a bit of edge it always has, and ALMOST. Gives a manta ray silhouette paired with the shawl (most noticeable in the topmost art! Didn't set out to do that, but when I noticed this I ran w it LMFAOO)
And. Some doodles
#fire emblem#feh#RETURN. OF MY SUMMER ALFONSE DESIGN.#like i said though this moe design gave me so much trouble. esp tragically the top pic where i FELT. I GOT IT JUST RIGHT#and then i added details impulsively in pen and the design got too busy. it really needs to be simple.#so what did i do? painstakingly scratch off the pen with a knife.#it's such a small drawing... but it was so perfect.... perfectly capturing everything i wanted to capture w a summer moe...#another thing is that i think sometimes you have to make sacrifices. like. a lot of my prev designs#made a point to show moe's top scars and ESP. its nipple piercings. but like. nothing seemed to work.#i think also bc i have to ask myself 'would moe feel comfortable wearing that?' both gender and autism wise#the sheer cover ups looked so uncomfortable. and i also think about what parts of moe's body#is it most uncomfortable with. thighs ranking first. its shorts always have to be around knee length#i think in second would be its waist/hips. not so much that it Can't be shirtless esp w top surgery#but enough that like. a cozy cute shawl might be nice.#little things change between each drawing too LMFAOO like changing the wristband color from red to green#NONE OF THIS FELT FINAL. all of it feel like I'M GETTING. SO CLOSE. SO FUCKING CLOSE#another scrapped idea was having a fishing lure dangle from the hat. but that would be So Fucking Annoying to wear LMFAOOO#and ESP annoying to draw w moe specifically. the way either eye is visible at any given time.#ANY WHICH WAY. THROWS THIS AT YOU#moe tag#summoner oc#fe alfonse#my art
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okay i was gonna make a post about how migraines feel like taking constant minecraft damage except your health bar is infinite, BUT UH. @staff WHY IS MY DESKTOP DASH COMPLETELY FUCKING REARRANGED. PUT IT BACK THIS SUCKS
#EXCUSE ME??? EXCUSE ME!!!! THIS IS HORRIBLE!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!#ITS LITERALLY BORDERLINE UNUSABLE WHY IS EVERYTHING MOVED AROUND?#AND ITS CLUTTERED AS FUCK?#like im not claustrophobic BUT THIS NEW LAYOUT IS MAKING ME FEEL LIKE I AM#i hate this!!! i hate it!!!!#usually updates are like 'well we moved some of your furniture while you werent looking'#and like yeah its disorienting#BUT WITH THIS ONE THEY REBUILT THE ENTIRE FUCKING HOUSE WHILE I WAS PASSED OUT#THIS IS NOT MY HOME WTF#the desktop dash was so nice! it was spread out! it was simple!#it felt cozy and welcoming!#THIS DASH WANTS ME GONE#tumblr update#absolutely unprompted#every day tumblr starts sliding towards the reason i completely quit instagram#which used to be my main site#that reason: cluttering#too much stuff in my face all the time#why does this site keep making Worse and Worse changes like leave it alone!!!!#cosmetically its fine!!! if its not broke dont fix it!#everyday i wake up and theres fuckin Something. damn#i hate this i hate this i hate this#PUT IT BACK. PLEASE!#maybe im overreacting but im genuinely so unsettled and disheartened by this#now i gotta fucking relearn the entire dash and get used to this squished n squeezed n cluttered Bullshit#tumblr: we want to welcome the new people!#tumblr: *starts alienating their (loyal) main/og userbase*#why.... just Why.... there is no good reason for this....
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#booklr#polls#mine#also if ur listening to music does it have to be music that fits the tone of what you're reading? bc thats fascinating to me#ive read while music has been playing but i tone it out completely (it's just there so i dont hear the screech of the tube which is even#more off-putting)#i prefer no noise but i do like the cozy feeling of rain while reading - not necessarily enough to actually play rain sounds tho#i did once with friends in a reading sprint and it was nice
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Do you have any super into detail thoughts on kyosaya? I know you've drawn a few art pieces for the ship, but I haven't seen any written think pieces about it from you.
I know there are some who don't like to use ships as a way to tie to a characters personality, so I guess I'm curious what your overall thoughts are on it and how it ties into sayaka as a whole.
"Think pieces" is a pretty neat way to put it...The primary foundation of KyoSaya to me revolves around a uniquely sapphic relationship that I hope would be expanded upon in future shows in the series.
↑ Yet, what are all these words supposed to mean? Sayaka has always done things for the sake of others. Her sense of justice elevated to the point where she views herself as a knight, someone who kneels in the face of goodness in respect of whatever is honourable to maintain it. But a knight is just another form of a pawn, just a stronger one whom everyone perceives has the ability to: 1) protect others 2) kill The Enemy.
Sayaka used to only ever have been able to interpret this in an extreme and binary vision. If she has to defend others, she has to devote herself fully to the cause. To her, the notion of self-care and self-preservation is difficult to comprehend since she feels as though she always has to be a monolith of one singular thing, of one side of things. To her, everything is like a chessboard. There is no way to play knight for both teams at once: either you prioritise yourself, or you prioritise others.
I understand that it is also a realistic depiction of how individuals like Sayaka constantly push through their own struggles alone while always uplifting others, a demonstration of unbalanced relationship dynamics. When this vision is challenged, Sayaka does not know where and how else she is expected to just "move forward" when she realised reality is not a simple game of chess. So she shrinks her view of the world further by clashing with Kyoko, since Kyoko is The Enemy who obstructs Sayaka's own perception of all that is Good and Just. Sayaka knew she was manipulated by Cubey™, but it was not only in the later movies that she comprehended the full extent of it. Something like that feels too complicated in her mind, so it's easier, much less burdensome to just lock onto one person to be angry with. This mentality is almost a sort of fallacy for Sayaka given she becomes a Witch in every cycle she becomes a magical girl.
Sayaka wants to feel relied on by humans. Kyoko does not desire nor expect anything from people, and thus balances out the extremes of Sayaka by being detached from worldly expectations - at least, that is what's consistent with Kyoko's perception of herself. A puppet without strings. She is not a pawn, not a knight. That's why she was angry when she realised the wish-granting alien omitted information on magical girl mechanisms and their life cycles. Instead of shovelling forward headstrong like Sayaka, however, Kyoko reconsiders her childhood memories and her desire, and it was to die with Sayaka so that Sayaka would not have, in Kyoko's eyes, perished for the sake of The Greater Good, because Kyoko believes still in the Self, not the vague promise of a better future.
Uhm. It's probably nonsense now that I put it in legible words. Some other KyoSaya fans who are big brained enough should educate me more on their dynamic, but I find their relationship to be interesting. It's very fallen angel x demon coded. I feel...as though Sayaka and Kyoko are hard to separate given they exist as characters that neutralise and support each other. Perhaps not codependent, but Sayaka was unhinged enough for Homura to not threaten her once, but twice whenever Madoka's feelings are involved. Meanwhile Homura was more...tolerant of Kyoko. Kyoko is there to keep Sayaka in check to make sure she doesn't piss off the Devil to the next century, and to me that is also funny.
[Although, it is tragic that since Sayaka embodies the sea, the only way Kyoko can only be with her "in death" due to the theme of Ophelia, her lover and the flame of the witch. Who could have predicted the doomed yuri is doomed. A sinking ship, even.]
#me rereading this: maybe i am a fake kyosaya fan...#i do love all ships with sayaka in it except maybe when it involves kyosuke#since it was confirmed that even if sayaka got together with him she would have been called a monster#okay.#mfw seikyu is literally too mentally ill to support herself. she's. trying guys#but it feels nice for sayaka because she feels being cared for by someone else for once#and it's “better” because she doesn't want to burden madoka#so she instead she turns to a person not previously familiar with her#but oops she caught feelings and now sayaka is stuck with 99 insight and kyoko is just eating as usual#i also like that their colours and personality are inversed#the ocean is furious but the flame is cozy#ASKS 💌#kyosaya#madoka magica#sayakyo
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Idk why i never feel like im allowed to think about my future. Probs a little depression thing but idk.
#part of me is like. its hopeless. and the other part of me is like. its not worth thinking about just chill#so im just kinda. idk. unmotivated#i have no goals#i dont want to be a successful artist i dont think i can travel with renfest without losing my cats and jonny#theyre my whole world. being away from them for two months is the most terrifying part of all that#i just feel like. idk. i know i'll figure out the point of it all eventually. i have faith things will fall into place#but i also know i have to work towards . something. anything#i dont want anything but people to devote myself to. its odd. why am i like this#how come when my thoughts stray and i think about my future all i ever want is someone to be there#i dont want a career or a big nice house or any of that i just want someone around#okay maybeeee i also want a nice house#maybe its animal brain. maybe the only dream i need is a pretty decorated cozy house and my arms around someones shoulders#not in a trad wife way .#i dont fucking want kids .#cats are okay#i wish i didnt live in capitalism
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#me quietly to myself: am i finally ready... to follow the skz people blogs I've been living at for at least a year now anyway?..#I'm with my usual bullshit pay me no mind#people who already know know ajhsjd#this thing where i can't follow new people because the dash seems overwhelming as it is#(and by new people i mean people whose blogs I've been visiting daily for a year yes)#and recently yes im feeling like my dash is actually a bit overwhelming#i sometimes can't even catch up with it after i wake up (a thing that is normal to want and possible to archive)#but also im literally like at the skz people's territory all day every day#spending more time over there than on my dash#like maybe it's time#besides today with the livestream and everything#i was sitting there so cozy thinking like ah we're watching this together it's so nice#the only thing that would make the experience better is me actually FOLLOWING PEOPLE#anyway I'll sleep on it and like again pay me no mind this is the brain issues i just seem to have#still such a funny problem to have#as far as I'm concerned most people on tumblr follow so many more blogs#and i get overwhelmed with just a few#you'd think I'm not having fun on here but thats not true#but i am in fact always have more fun on here when i manage to psspspsp someone with the same interest#i love tags reblogs replies i love these interactions#and the funny little follow button makes all this so muuuuch easier#alas the brain bugs that are eating my brain are never asleep#but still I'm gonna go sleep and im gonna just be chill about all this#thanks for coming to the least making sense ted talk#chattering
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Applying to an apartment with little income and terrible credit score, in hopes that they'll be desperate enough to take me
#im not even getting my hopes up for this one folks#but this same company rook me when i had no rental history so maybe?#unlikely for the aforementioned piss poor income and credit score#im just praying they remember me feom when i used to rent from them and liked me enough then to take me again#the bathroom is not in the apartment btw#that's the wildest thing. like its a basic studio with a kitchen closet and main area#but you have to go across the hall. to the private bathroom#im hoping they realize that thats wild and give me the apartment#i neeeeed to leave my parents house. and i really miss that city the apartment is in#i wish there was a little essay section where i could tell the landlord how much i like the city#and that ill get a better job once i live there and my parents are going to pay my first month and security deposit#that would be nice#i applied knowing that i won't get it but also knowing that i cant get it if i dont try#mostly i just miss that city#there was a really nice coffee shop within walking distance of my apartment#(the apartment i applied to is next door to the building i used to live in so same area which is great)#but i didnt have wifi so i would go there a lot to do work. it was so cozy in the winter especially#and i went on a lot of walks. so i wiuld swing by there and grab a drink to sip on my walk#and it was literally within sight of a great lake. a literal great lakw of Michigan lol#i loved walking along the lake on a nice day. or a windy day and just watch the waves crash#and my favorite band is feom that city so i got to see so many of their performances. and theyre a small band so the most i ever paid#was $50 and that was for the vip package. i saw them for $10 once. and free once. and $50 for the vip#its a big art and music city and i love it so much. i miss it so fucking much and i regret leaving#but at least it made me realize that no other city is for me. that city is my home#oh and it was literally right next to a bug beautiful library that i loved to wander. i still have my library card from there#mostly used it to print stuff and you have to pay at the box next to the printer. and one time i forgot to pay. i still feel bad about that#but i dont want to reminisce too much cuz i know i wont get it#im trying to pay off my credit cards to bring up my credit score but its slow going#its much nearer my gf and all my friends so i would love to live near them. rn im hours away from about everyone i love#i ran out of tags. maybe pray for me if you pray? or just hope for me. i dont want to let myself want this but its there
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Just had my first consultation with a tattoo artist ever (the other times I've litterally just shown up x'D) and it was online.
I loved that the first thing that the artist notices is my Cha Cha Cha mixtape and/or Bojere artwork on my wall x'D
(she litterally said: "Is that Käärijä back there!?". Bless her :'D)
#it went really well#she was really nice#I am quite excited tbh#sounds like she has reserved the whole day for me so that'll be cozy#plus the fact that she a) pointed out käärijä and b) recently submitted a häärijä tattoo she'd made makes me feel even more at home#love that my first tattoo in finland will be with a (maybe) fan xD#waiting to pay the consultation fee now :3#micahs thoughts#micahs foolery
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lowkey it kinda bothers me a little bit that we've literally never seen the inside of a Dunlanding house. The only interiors we got in Dunland were craft areas and meeting-halls, never seen inside of one home. I mean presumably it looks similar to the interiors we've already seen (round, built a little ways into the ground, probably has a firepit in the center, furnished with a lot of fur rugs, most likely a bit smaller), but like, what do their beds look like? do they have bedframes or are they just on the ground? what does the rest of their furniture look like? are there windows or all they all as dark as the other buildings we've seen in Dunland? is it sectioned off into rooms or is it one large circular chamber? what different kinds of decorations would be in there??? I need to know these things!
#I mean I guess this just means I'll need to figure out these things myself in reguards to what Margim's house looks like#but it would have been nice for lotro to give me more to work with as a starting point y'know?#I think that they should have some windows at least. like not made of glass but just some way to let in natural light and fresh air#the other buildings we've seen in lotro look cozy and all but they just So Dark#I assume the other ones in-game had some sort of windows (I think you can even see them on some exteriors)#but they were just literally never sown open on the inside#as far as beds go I think that‚ regardless of what the 'norm' is in Dunland‚ Margim sleeps on the floor actually#I mean think about it she's literally been sleeping on the floor her whole life. I think she would feel too exposed sleeping off the ground#so she just has a big pile of furs and blankets and other soft bedding she sleeps on#obviously I didn't do that in her lotro house but that's just bc they don't give me enough fur items to make that vision work#lotro
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I've never been a "born in the wrong generation" type of guy because for So Many reasons I would be dead. Full stop like I would have died during childbirth I would have died of appendicitis age 8 and that's not even factoring in my queerness and neurodivergency and ultimately my mental health (carefully maintained thanks to support/modern advances in medicine and treatment). On Top Of That my hobbies include The Video Game and many such things that are of modern invention (adjacently: including The Device I'm typing this out on right now which has become my main avenue of communication to the outside world)
But I'm just saying that. It WOULD be nice. To exist in a world where fluorescent lighting doesn't exist and everything is possibly 99% less overstimulating all of the time forever.
#and like. a little less capitalist dystopia. i could do with less of that.#but focusing primarily on my own struggle. it's just a bummer sometimes like#i genuinely had fun!!! w my sisters and friends!!! esp at the arcade w ddr that is ALWAYS so fun#but man you can't even take me to your own damn house unless if you're ready to accept vampire rules.#my sister can/does dim the lights if i ask and i don't mind asking it's just fucking crazy to me like#damn uoy guys live like this. bright ass lights ten diff convos at once music in the bg. what if i died on this beanbag#BUT. THAT IS. one thing that is very nice i AM allowed to die on the beanbag!!!!!!! i'm allowed to cozy up and rest#while everyone does their own thing and i can listen in and chime in every now and again. severely underrated tbh#i really only feel a little hopeless when i think about like. public spaces where the only thing i can control is myself#IF i am ever employable again my requirements would be. no florescent lighting. i will die.#which like. kind of limits my prospects.#i do enjoy outdoors/physical work actually though so. i'm just limited bc i have to bind.#i am. so severely. banking on top surgery working out. it won't be a cure-all but by god it WILL open up my options#plus the. constant fatigue. of binding. but not binding is even worse. i need divine intervention (surgery)#SAD. well there are other people in yhe world#but man rhat is like my fave joke to make but i feel so much sadness attached to it. the world will move on without me.#there are a million other people who are far more capable. much 'easier'. ect.#and i know the answer is well there's only one me and there are a handful of people who love me. who keep me and include me#i am very thankful for that.#it's just a bit of a bummer sometimes. i stay silly and have the most fun i can but i am a little sad about it.
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I want to hug the new tardis interior. I want to lie down on the floor in there. I bet it’s the perfect temperature (I know Donna said it’s cold but I like it cold). Looking up at the lights while they’re moving and blinking would be a healing experience for me I think.
#the color palette is so soft#like yeah it was blue and orange and green and purple but they were slightly desaturated and it was so soothing to the eye idk#I think it would just feel Nice in there#I love the clunkyness of the console; and how it’s slightly off-white#it’s all light and empty but it’s not in a sleek modern way; it’s still so cozy to me. it’s magic idk how they did that.#doctor who#dw 60th#the star beast#tardis
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